#it's only a shame that show has like a $5 budget

[yandere-daydreams]

sup do ya have a ranking for your husbands and wives

the exact rankings are prone to change but you get the broad strokes. also separate lists bc the guys would get absolutely decimated if they were lumped together and i don't think my awful husbands deserve that kind of negativity.

wives:

5) grell sutcliff of black butler fame. i think about her at least once a day. particularly her monologue from the atlantic arc. it did things to me.

4) childe

3) mrs. yor forger my beloved,, i know i don't talk about her a lot but i am constant kicking my feet and giggling whenever she's on screen,,, if loid was not also a yor stan i would hate him with an unspeakable passion

2) ganyu <3 <3 <3 i'm so sorry to have betrayed her this way but she is still very dear to me T-T

1) FURINA FURINA FURINA FURINA F̵̛̘̔̀̽̌̒̔͐͗̈́̏̈͠Ȕ̶̡̧̡̦͎̖̬͇̜̠̹̼̂̃͗͛̎̉̈̐͒̏̔̉͊̏R̶͍̥̱̂͑̒Į̸̧̢̢̨͔͕̝̖̺̱̼͓̅͌N̷̥͇̹̺̟̮̠̩̹̮̊͒͂̊̃̒͛͊̋̈́̈͆͝A̵̻̹͍̪͍̺͍̩̮̤̩̗̿̀͐̈̾͜

husbands:

5) gojo (*a crowd boos somewhere in the distance*). this wasn't supposed to happen but he's just SO annoying and SO pretty and i want to put him in a blender. sigh.

4) that one medicine vendor from mononoke. our time together was brief but he truly has such a stranglehold on my daily life it's actually sickening.

3) baizhubaizhubaizhubaizhu <3 <3 <3 <3 i honestly didn't like him that much when he first game out, but his story quest and his crop top won me over. medical malpractice once again reigns supreme.

2) illumi my beloved <3 <3 he gets points for having the sluttiest waist i've ever seen but loses them bc i think he'd kill me without hesitation but gains them back bc he seems especially breedable.

1) MR. BABYGIRL SUPREME GETO SUGURU HIMSELF!!! what can i say. he fathered so hard he mothered and i love a man with a creative outlet (or a cult, whatever). sorry about all the murders ig. god forbid a woman do anything in this world.

[gabessquishytum]

No one is entirely sure how it started, as it came about so gradually. Certainly it wasn’t the job Hob Gadling was originally hired for at Endless Ltd.—in fact no one can quite recall what his original job was at this point, beyond that whatever it was he’s no longer doing it—but no one is complaining, as it’s generally agreed to be a major benefit to the office environment.

The idea is that if you request a meeting with him, and he accepts and puts you in his schedule, it’s understood that you’re meeting in his private office to have sex with Hob Gadling, Company Slut.

You wouldn’t think it necessarily to look at him. Sure he’s gorgeous and charming enough, but he behaves like your average friendly coworker—you wouldn’t be able to tell that underneath his business casual clothes he was wearing lingerie and a plug to keep him nice and open for his next “meeting”, or that he has a small closet full of other sexy little numbers and toys in his office (that the company gives him a budget for).

The whole thing mostly works because Hob is just so likeable, both in and out of meetings. He cheerfully participates in work events and hangouts and friendly office gossip, and remembers important details you shared about yourself and your life. And in meetings he’s open to most things, never makes you feel shamed or embarrassed for what you’re into, and always helps you clean up and put yourself back together at the end (and of course he’s an amazing fuck every time). Everyone remembers fondly the story of there being a mix-up and two different people showed up to Hob’s office at the same time for a meeting. Hob had looked at the pair of them and suggested they share the time slot, as he thinks they’d appreciate each other’s contributions. After that meeting the two started dating, and have recently just gotten engaged.

(Everyone also remembers with awe the story of the board meeting that was turning incredibly tense, and if it exploded the way it was threatening to it would’ve caused a lot of problems for everyone at the company. Then someone had the bright idea to call up Hob and ask if he was willing to come mediate. He walked in, then a couple hours later everyone walked out looking pleased and relaxed, all issues resolved. Hob stumbled out after them looking very rumpled, very satisfied, and very worn out, and everyone was very understanding when he decided to reschedule his next few meetings and take the rest of the day off.)

Currently, office gossip has noticed that Hob has been having a few more meetings than normal with Mr. Dream Endless, one of the CEOs (Hob usually goes to the Endless CEOs for meetings instead of them coming to him, so it’s easier to notice when they happen), and a few people think they’ve spotted the two of them spending time together outside of work, possibly in a date setting? General consensus is pleased for Hob and they wish him well, though some are concerned about what the relationship would mean for his job, both for their own interests and for his job security.

(Dream has no intention of ending or changing Hob’s position as Company Slut so long as he’s happy to keep doing it. For one thing, it’s clearly a benefit to the company; employee turnover is at an all time low, productivity is up, and morale has never been better. For another thing, Dream finds it all incredibly hot. The only way it’d be better would be if he could watch Hob at work, if it weren’t a violation of privacy for his other employees. As it is, Hob has taken to sending Dream post-meeting selfies of himself looking well-fucked as a compromise.)

-🪽anon

I like this concept soooo much. Company Slut Hob!

From 9 til 5, Hob works a very busy day. He usually grabs breakfast at the office cafeteria so he can say hi to his colleagues - he's a very social guy! And after that, he gets right to work. He mainly organises his own diary so from 9 - 11am he's mainly arranging "meetings", taking a few calls (some people like to just talk to Hob, and it's a service he happily provides as he describes his lingerie of the day). By late morning, it's time to properly get to work. Frustrations have been worked up, people are getting tense and frankly, some just need stimulation. That's exactly what Hob is there for. And aside from a quick lunch break, he's pretty much block-booked up until he staggers home at 5pm. Occasionally he works overtime - more than usual, ever since he's been spending more time with workaholic Dream... but of course so one wants him to burn out, so he has plenty of scheduled days off to relax and rest his tired body.

When an email finally goes around to the whole company announcing that Hob and Dream are dating, many workers nearly have a heart attack! But the email assures them that Hob will keep his job and nothing will change. The whole office collectively sighs in relief. The company would definitely collapse in less than a month if Hob had to quit! But if anything he seems more horny and full of energy than before. He's got new lingerie to show off, and Dream has given his whole little office a makeover so it's now even more comfortable for both Hob and his colleagues. In fact, some workers who weren't really interested in Hob’s services before start showing up just to cuddle on his big plush sofa and talk through their problems.

Hob deserves a very big bonus, and no doubt he'll get one... in the form of Dream’s cock and a blank cheque for him to spend at his leisure!

[kimbapisnotsushi]

sou !! hello !! this is also random and specific but i saw the datekou headcanon post and i was wondering. might you have any inarizaki road trip hcs?

i didn't until you asked me so LET'S GO

oh god you thought dateko was bad??? they were only stuck in the car for thirty minutes at MOST

(or something idk i haven't quite mapped out their geography yet but miyagi is a coastal prefecture and sendai isn't like SUPER far inland, so i'm just making assumptions out here)

but anyways. kurosu is driving obviously as much as he moans and groans about it

shoutout to the coaches btw they are CARRYING these headcanons

realistically i guess they'd road trip to another school for a training camp or like idk. maybe hot springs for some r&r bc inarizaki def has the budget for it but in my heart they road trip to suna's hometown during one of the breaks so suna can see his family <333

i guess it also kind of depends on WHERE in hyogo and aichi they are but we could get a solid 4-5 hours of driving if it was from, say, asago to tahara

kita makes a list of all the snacks everyone wants and rounds up aran, oomimi, and akagi to help him raid the market/convenience store like the old hunter-gatherer days

they end up with two massive tote bags of drinks, chips, cookies, and other miscellaneous snacks and one cooler for things like puddings and cakes and whatnot

oomimi sits shotgun because kurosu needed someone to help with directions and everyone else was on "make sure the miyas don't kill each other before we get there" duty

they all thought that kita was brilliant for making atsumu sit in the back and osamu up front because even tho they're separated the twins will NOT stop bickering and trying to throw random pieces of trash at each other. poor riseki gets caught in the crossfire the most often

they all converged to make one giant road trip playlist so you've got the weirdest mix of pop rock/bubblegum/k-pop/city pop, lofi, indie soft rock, show tunes and soundtracks, and more

(i named those genres with certain charas in mind so like. have fun figuring that out!)

nobody's willing to take a nap in fear of what the twins might do to each other when they're not looking

they play really stupid games like the alphabet-chain game and i spy and even try for a few rounds of truth or dare because, hey, there's nothing like being stuck in a car with your fellow teenagers for four hours to set the mood for emotionally vulnerable bonding time, right?

anyways. everyone learns that gin is afraid of heights and all sorts of horror movies, akagi would like to get his ears pierced some day, kosaku got rejected in middle school in front of his entire class and has refused to fall in love since, and suna takes pictures to capture the memory of a place he does not want to forget

(sorry i'm being emo about suna missing home again i'll stop)

kurosu is sweating BUCKETS in the front seat btw. "oh my god what do i do with this information am i supposed to talk to them i'm their TEACHER i'm supposed to guide them i do NOT get paid enough for this - "

a shame, really, considering inarizaki could definitely afford to give that man a raise

it's okay they get some really funny dares like daring gin to text his crush a totally random and weird question

(and thank god atsumu has his phone tucked away in his bag)

there's not a whole lot of dares they can do in the car tbh so they get really creative like daring osamu to eat this absolutely evil concoction of mixing tiramisu pudding into a bag of spicy chips and eating the whole thing

he does. nobody knows how he survived it

and then riseki dared both osamu AND atsumu to shut up and sit down and not even so much as GLANCE each other for the rest of the trip

this was at, like, the 1.5 hour mark btw

and okay he didn't say it EXACTLY like that because riseki is a sweet respectful underclassman but that WAS the closest to snapping he's ever gotten

they do stop occasionally here and there to get out and stretch their legs, but this makes their trip even longer bc it takes like thirty minutes each time to wrangle everyone and get them back in the van

also akagi is trying out his most terrible pickup lines. or antipickup lines. either one works

akagi: "are you lactose? because i can't tolerate you ;)" aran: "PLEASE, MAKE HIM STOP"

the only reason aran feels like he isn't completely suffering is because gin is sitting next to him and gin is kind of soothing like a cute pet would be. not that aran is thinking of gin as a pet nooooo ahahaha that would be weird

meanwhile gin is wondering why aran keeps trying to feed him crackers

they finally get to suna's hometown after being on the road for SIX AND A HALF HOURS

and while everyone is happy to be outside soaking up the sun and fresh air, they're all going to miss the bonding of being stuck in a van perhaps just a little bit

it's all right, they've got the return trip to look forward to

(made 100x worse when akagi busts out a drinking game and proclaims they should play with juice boxes, but that's a story for another time)

[quartings-main-blog]

Pseudo Harem Reviews: Episode 1

I don't want to clutter my art blog with 12+ nerding out posts, so I'll be posting episode reviews here every week instead!

Animation

It’s a bit on the cheaper side, but that’s okay since the art style is very faithful and nice, even down to the slightly crooked mouths in some scenes- which I personally find a bit charming! Another change I like is adding a blue-grey tint to Rin’s hair to stop it from blending too much into other dark objects like her blouse!

I do wish that the animation got to be a bit higher quality at points. To list a similar show for comparison like Tomo, it at least had some dynamic animation for action shots and better lighting in the night scenes. At least showing some visual or audio cue for Rin’s switch in personas would help. Also I'm not sure I like how the personas are listed as stuff like "spoiled girl" instead of "Spoiled-Chan", "Spoiled Rin", "Sweet-girl" or anything to solidify their identities more. I can only hope a potential dub is able to figure out how to make it work!

Voice Acting

I’m not a longtime fan of Saori Hayami like some of the people who follow her in Spy X Family, Oregairu, and more, but I like the work she does here as Rin! I agree with the few people who say her voice is a biiiit too adult for a high schooler, but I at least like her voices for Cool-chan and Spoiled-chan. Her takes on Cheeky and Tsundere could be a bit more on the high-pitched side though. Still excited to hear more though!

Nobuhiko Omamoto as Eiji is nice too in one of the more subdued roles I’ve seen him in- he does a great job of capturing Eiji’s straightforward and goofy sides and you can feel why Rin likes him early on!

And I’m still crossing my fingers for a phenomenal dub too, which should hopefully get more new viewers onboard with this show! (PLEASE don’t be a bad dub…)

Music - OP and ED

So far nothing major to note in the soundtrack- just your standard highschool romcom style score. I will say I love both the OP and ED as songs- they’re great and I’ve already added what I can to my playlists! And I do hope we get the Rin and Eiji version of the opening down the line too (and maybe some extra surprises hopefully?)

It’s just a shame when the opening suffers from some of the cheapest animation in the whole show- it’s supposed to be the thing that hooks viewers into watching, but over half of it is just a bunch of still PNGs, barely showing the actual Pseudo Harem gimmick until the chorus.

At least the ED has cooler and more creative visuals with the anime-to-manga hybrid beginning, the rap verse from Rin, and better showing off all her personas (I find it a bit funny they’re trying to showcase every single one rather than the main 4-5 to entice new viewers more and maybe provide more contrast haha)

Pacing

And here we have the elephant in the room. I was so hyped for this series I didn’t even consider that the short disconnected nature of the series’ early chapters would lead to a very disjointed first few episodes.

If the show wanted to spend more effort on animation, they could have either rearranged the chapters so that the similar ones in the same settings got paired up into bigger scenes like how Squid Girl did it. If I could have everything my way, I would just extend the episodes with lots of original content, but I know that’s unrealistic.

If not, then short connecting scenes or establishing shots could help, or even interlude cards if you really want to save on budget. From what I’ve heard new viewers say, they all really liked the series concept, the characters, and their dynamic, but they were really put off by the pacing, assuming it would be this way for the whole show. And sadly, I can’t blame them for being disappointed since they don’t know the series will go into longer arcs and better-paced episodes as it goes on.

The choice to move their first meeting to the first scene was also very odd, as it shows why Eiji likes Rin, but creates a weird and unclear timeskip where she likes him by the Ch1 gym scene immediately after, and also kind of diffuses a bit of the tension on whether Eiji actually likes Rin or just the Pseudo Harem for the first 40 chapters or so.

I can only hope the show better arranges the scenes to keep the viewers’ attention from Episode 2 onwards!

Extras/Overall

I still had tons of fun with this pilot though! I do hope it shapes up a bit more in the animation and pacing departments, and I hope new viewers will give this show the usual 3-episodes chance at the very least! This is still my most anticipated anime of 2024 and I can’t wait for more!

[little-miss-understood]

All About the Agrestes

(Which is really what Miraculous Ladybug has become)

At some point in between releasing the PV-version of Miraculous Ladybug, and taking the series to air, a decision was made in regards to how the deuteragonist would relate to the antagonist of the story. As most know by now, originally the villain and the character who had the Black Cat were not related, but that ended up being changed by the time the show we know now made it to air.

To the detriment of everything that came after. It overtly complicates everything when it doesn't have to be.

And we can blame Thomas Astruc for this decision, as he believed that Felix as he was in PV came off too much as an "anime cliché". Which is honestly surprising when one considers that in the series, when he is reintroduced, he basically becomes more effective than Adrien ever could be.

But the effect of doing this change, in making Adrien and then also having him be the son of Gabriel Agreste, who is the main villain, makes the whole series unbalanced. It gives everything away before the start because it makes the ending that's coming be tragic for all involved. There's no way out of that, much like the fucking Love Square itself.

One has to ask, why? What could have been done better? For starters, actually keeping Adrien and Gabriel as separate entities and not family would have made for a stronger series, though I suppose there would be less needless angst (Chat Blanc haunting Marinette) here and there. Have his parents be some rich family but then it becomes a tale about how two teens get wrapped up in this whole Miraculous thing and neither really wanted to be. Then there's also faulty math in the chances of Hawk Moth being, of all people, the father of one of Marinette's classmates. There are thousands bordering millions of people in Paris and somehow it all comes down to one family and a class of kids? A stronger villain would have come from being outside of that entirely.

(Which is also why Marinette would have been smart to choose people outside of her class to be heroes, but I digress it's kind of hard to show that on a series where the budget only allows for reuse of most akumas outside of new ones for Chloe every season.)

(Yes this also means Adrien's not a Sentimonster in this scenario but honestly they pulled that out of their asses.)

The story of the Agrestes also overshadows that of Marinette, and it's a shame. I've brought up before about how the show pushes her to the background but Season 5 has hammered it in even more, considering this is the season we also finally learn of Gabriel's past, how they found the Miraculous in the first place, and then everything involved in getting this mess to a "conclusion".

This is without going into how Adrien ends up being a significantly flawed deuteragonist, how Gabriel is a monster yet ends up winning, and honestly for what? So that the whole series can revolve around Marinette saving the "Prince"? If we were being realistic, Marinette should have sidestepped all of this and the mess the Agreste family is.

For a show about "Girl Power", they seem to lean into the lifestyles of this rich family an awful lot, and it makes a waste of five seasons. They won't have this crutch soon, so I wonder how they're going to make use of Lila as the Butterfly-

(remembers that they gave her three mothers and multiple identities in Season 5)

Goddamnit.

[inkofamethyst]

March 13, 2024

Happy covid-iversary, yay. "Two weeks to stop the spread," is a saying that will haunt me my entire life, I think.

I didn't actually journal on March 13 which is a shame in hindsight, but I remember not doing much. I lounged around my house because classes were cancelled, I picked my sister up from school, and we went to get ice cream. A lot of other people from my/her high school had the same idea, so the line was long, and I was too awkward to say hi to the people I kinda knew (but I always thought they were cooler than me (I genuinely think most people are cooler than me... which might be a problem in some respects, but I'll deal with that later.)).

Anyway I coded for 5 hours straight and got a working encounter system, a working character creator, and a working opponent set generator. There's still a lot to move from my note to the script, but, the game works, and everything I've written runs as intended. Is it fun? Well, right now, it's all the same. Name yourself, fight one-fight two-fight three (each only requiring one or two inputs), game ends. It was exciting the first couple of times, but now I want to add more for more variety, of course.

[edit: wrote the above a couple days ago and after a break it has returned to being kind of fun. I've also learned that instantaneousness kills all tension, so I wrote a few basic functions to delay and separate lines in various ways. Anyway I'm going to hold off on doing much more transcribing/coding from my pseudocode, since I don't want to get too far ahead of the final project timeline, and I don't even really know what the expectations are, so I could be way outside of bounds here and I just wouldn't know.]

[edit 2, next day: New plan. Going to write more detailed pseudo/update poorly-detailed pseudo, do some story planning for the secret ending that I don't intend to get to but hey yaneverknow, and try to balance mechanics/come up with items/do a bunch of the little things that sap a surprising amount of creativity.]

I also binged She-Hulk, and I loved it?! I thought it was going to be awful and cringey the way people online (dudes?) talked about it, but it was genuine, and meta, and actually had me laughing at times. I mean, that last episode? Come on!!! Sure, some of the vfx were just alright, but it's a show, and after six-odd years of AOS, I'm used to it. I'm glad they leaned into the unseriousness. Also,,,, Matt Murdock is such a hottie. The quips, the law banter, the violence, ahhhh. My dnd-friend strongly endorses Daredevil, but I've held off because I was afraid of the violence, honestly. But I'm a big girl, and I'm very good at closing my eyes.

Today I'm thankful for a successful antiquing run!!!! Early last semester I heard about this antique market, and I finally put in the effort to get there today, and it was amazing!!! I was looking for shared housewares (found the specific item I was looking for!) and unique vintagey jewelry. Didn't quite manage to find anything truly vintage, but I got a darling piece of simple costume jewelry and the most fantastic mug that's shaped like a head of lettuce (this description does not do its beauty justice). The necklace will be perfect for when I finally make my way to the opera, and the mug is like something a fairy would drink from. I stayed within my budget which means I have just a little bit left in my allowance to thrift for clothes, maybe on Friday or Saturday (since I'll be in lab all day tomorrow).

By the way, the antique store was amazing. It has at least five floors (I got tired after three and a half) and is filled to the brim with some of the most eclectic stuff you could ever find, with old-timey radios playing music from various eras throughout. Magical. I could waste a lot of money there.

Oh wait, before I go, yesterday was such a busy day that I didn't even journal but I:

Met up with a lab/classmate and their partner for a lunch and a stroll in the city which was fantastic. My original plan was to go see Dune and also to pick up some (red, short, block) heels I'd ordered, but I didn't end up liking the heels on me very much, and I was enjoying the pair's company too much to cut the time short with a three-hour movie.

Went to a paint night through a diversity org I'm in which was also fantastic. I painted a cute little mushroom scene! I don’t really consider myself a visual artist and I’m not a huge fan of acrylic but it was very relaxing so I’d love to try watercolor sometime. Also like,, because this isn’t my "preferred medium" it was SO nice to not be stressed about perfection and just go for it.

[magnorious]

Review: The Last Airbender Episodes 4&5

Why was Netlfix so hell-bent on adapting this show instead of making something new in the ATLA universe? Make a Kyoshi spin-off! Everyone would have been hyped to watch Kyoshi crush skulls between her thighs. Make some other avatar we’ve never heard of with complete freedom to do whatever you want with their story. The 100-year war can’t be the only conflict in the history of this world and the gap between Wan and… I believe Kuruk is the earliest-named Avatar in canon after him, is massive.

It would have been free from all the “the cartoon did this better” nitpicks and legit complaints.

If they wanted to Game of Thrones-ify it, they should have taken notes on how to deliver exposition. Opening the pilot spoiling the best reveals of season 1 would be like opening GoT with Jaime Lannister stabbing the Mad King with full context for why he did it, instead of waiting for that reveal when he’s confessing to Brienne.

“The Storm” was perfect, and you soiled it!

—

Season 1 of the original is the weakest in terms of consistency. This season has both “The Storm” and “The Great Divide”. It didn’t have the biggest budget and didn’t have the intense overarching story of 2 or 3 with the struggle over the Earth Kingdom and the climax with the Fire Nation.

So skipping and rushing a few episodes like “The Great Divide” or even “Bato of the Water Tribe” and just sifting out all the important beats wouldn’t have made too many complain. I didn’t have a huge problem with shoving 3 episodes worth of content into one menagerie because it still worked, even if it didn’t stick the landing.

But it just keeps going. If they hadn’t cut away to the Fire Nation scenes, maybe they could have reworked all this Omashu plot into one episode. I’m bored. I’d rather be annoyed, than be bored. Boredom is the cardinal sin of entertainment. They take forever in the Spirit World too with all these unnecessary flashbacks for Sokka and Katara.

Still don’t like Iroh. “It seems we are always getting on or off boats, perhaps that is our lot in life, Prince Zuko.” Wow. Sagely wisdom. I want that on a t-shirt. Totally.

*Side note: Couldn’t you keep any of the original episode titles? Name the premier “Boy in the Iceberg,” episode 2 “Warriors of Kyoshi”, episode 3 “Jet”, episode 4 “The King of Omashu”, episode 5 “The Winter Solstice”.

Aang’s conversation with Iroh in the crystal cave prison cells looks and feels like they stole it from “Crossroads of Destiny”, except that Aang is way more vitriolic than he should be. He gets indignant, but he never gets so judgemental.

When I said in my last review that these characters aren’t cartoonish enough — Bumi is supposed to be over 100 years old, as old as Aang. His actor looks 60. Costume is pretty, though and coding the kingdom of Omashu as Indian and the rest of the Earth Kingdom as Chinese implies they were their own kingdom for a very long time and got annexed so, kudos.

Bumi’s voice attempts to fill the cartoonish void but because everything else is so grounded, it’s just awkward. He got turned into a royal jerk, not just a crazy old man like he used to be. Also not letting the “Bumi” reveal happen, that even one of Aang’s ties to his old life is still kicking, is disappointing. This isn’t Bumi. Not to mention that Bumi, in season 1, would never let this happen to his city, or his prisoners of war. Manufactured drama is manufactured and we all noticed.

~Secret Tunnel! Secret Tunnel! Through the mountains! Secret Secret Secret Secret Tunnel! Yeah. ~

I am actually shocked they kept the hippies. Very well brought to life.

I didn’t mind episode 3 playing fast and loose with the episode order and content, but butchering the “Cave of Two Lovers” is a crying shame (and dragging it out of season 2, no less). The story of the two lovers (read by Katara, not the hippie whose name escapes me) was reflected in Katara and Aang’s journey through the caves. Romance has never been Avatar’s strong suit, but the episode was still entertaining. Now it reads like Katara and Sokka are the lovers, which is a *choice*, but no, they just bicker.

Iroh’s side plot with the Earth Kingdom soldiers, with this unnamed dude we don’t care about, certainly fills the more adult tone they insist on going for, it just doesn’t need to be here. Once again, the original got away with implication flawlessly, instead of preaching the horrors of war explicitly.

I can’t remember exactly, but Lu Ten was danced around as a topic until Iroh’s mini-sode in “Tales of Ba Sing Se”. We could see that he wasn’t all smiles, we knew the wacky uncle was a bit of a mask, but that episode showed you exactly who Iroh is when no one saw it coming. All this filler is just a whole lot of unnecessary scenes and dialogue hammering home a backstory done way better with far less.

And, that episode was in season 2. Once again, the writers can’t hold out on a mystery for anything.

*Side side note: For shame slipping a piano into the score! For shame! Get that Western percussion out of here. Maybe GoT is just on my mind thanks to that rumor, but the theme music for the Southern Water Tribe sounds a lot like the Winterfell theme in the beginning. Hell and gone from any asiatic influences.

“It wasn’t the crystals that guided Oma and Shu,” no, actually, it was. You just didn’t want to animate the wolfbats so you turned the gentle giant badger-moles into snarling beasts.

Oh, there’s Zuko’s sympathetic side in that flashback about Lu Ten. Nicely done, no notes. That’s the Iroh I want the entire season. I hear that Leaves from the Vine in the background.

—

Episode 5 opens with some ham-fisted exposition and wow, that was impressively bland. 

I… spoke too soon about omitting Bonzu Pipinpadaloxicopolis. My mistake. And I spoke too soon about enjoying Azula and Ozai. They’re both still great, they just don’t need to be here yet.

Because they have to make up scenes for these characters, they still say a whole lot of words without saying much at all – except that Ozai now randomly actually respects his son and chastises his daughter for mocking Zuko. That’s new. Ozai is all about “self-serving flattery and coy whispers.” Dude named himself the Phoenix King and invented a rank above Fire Lord for his own vanity. He would be a loser if he wasn’t so powerful.

Okay, the show got me. I actually laughed out loud when Zuko tried to bribe the Earth Kingdom tavern keeper and it didn’t work.

Nice to see they paid as much attention to the “Great Divide” as the Ember Island Players, but for shame about “The Waterbending Scroll.” That was a decent episode. They also skipped most of “The Fortune Teller” and carved out June and *man* is that some rushed CGI on Nyla.

Wan Shi Tong?! *checks notes* 20 episodes early?! His VA is great. Gravely goodness.

Iroh accidentally reads the script notes when he says “Zhao is already making his moves and we have yet to draw our tiles”. These two are aimless, leadless, and hitting plot points like potholes.

Regarding Aang dragging Sokka and Katara into the Spirit World with him, as far as I know only avatars and Iroh can enter the Spirit World. They don’t need to be part of these scenes. When I said the writers did their homework in the pilot, they must’ve read the SparkNotes for “The Winter Solstice”, and instead filled it with stolen flashbacks from season 3.

I take it back. I take back wanting to skip “Bato of the Water Tribe”. Hakoda never got the chance to do Sokka’s ceremony, that’s why it was Bato’s job, that’s why Sokka was left behind and so much older than the rest of the kids in the village, because he wasn’t a man yet. Are all these supposed to steal from “The Swamp”? They aren’t from season 1.

Koh looks great. That’s the best part of this whole over-long sequence. Koh. Even seeing Gyatso again doesn’t feel earned when this scene doesn’t need to exist. It’s not like Katara and Sokka are learning new information, nor are they the bridge between the worlds. Aang doesn’t quite feel like the “last airbender” if he can chat with Gyatso’s ghost whenever he wants, he’s supposed to be utterly alone, 100 years divorced from everything he’s ever known.

Gyatso’s speech is nice, if I extract it from its context.

—

This show is missing artistry. Some beautiful establishing shots and cinematography, scenes I can freeze-frame and stare at and turn into wallpaper – not to mention that once again, it’s too damn dark to see anything in night scenes.

Once again, the VFX is very obvious and distracting. I know the artists aren’t to blame, but, gee, had the whole thing been a cartoon, there wouldn’t be a need for realistic CGI.

Slamming all these episodes together like this makes them messy. The plot isn’t a meandering adventure filled with side-quests anymore. It’s not written like a show where you tune in once a week for a good time. It’s written like a bingeable Netflix property, and released all at once like one. They could have at least staggered the release to two episodes at a time.

I don't think I'm actually going to finish it. At least not now. I don't want to give Netflix the view thinking I watched beacuse I was invested. I wish it were as bad as the original movie, if only so I could make fun of it.

[puncromancer]

personal shit

 but i got laid off last year right before the holidays which is the shittiest time in the world to lay someone off because absolutely nobody hires you at the end of the year because that’d be wild to hire before the new budget and also everyone’s just out for the holidays. My boss was very respectful about it and gave me privacy and like blocked the window to my office with his body so nobody could look and see me crying which was very nice. But the CEO had a stick up his butt about there had always only ever been two IT people before and he felt that having three was a waste of money. Ben the other sysadmin had been with the company (not in IT though another department) for 5 years which left only me on the chopping block. Even though I consistently closed the most tickets and put the most work in. And he said it was nothing about my work and that he’d recommend me to any contact that asked for a sysadmin and he’d be happy to answer any reference calls for me. And honestly a week after new years, i got a very sexy new job making 20k more than i was and doing like 10% of the work? so it worked out very much in my favor but it was a very deeply shameful fact for me that I was unemployed for two months. it felt like i failed my wife and it was awful for my mental health i couldn’t sleep i was straight up hallucinating and had trouble telling what was cooked up by my depression soup brain and what was real. Looking back on it I think I might have schizophrenia or something that emerges due to stress because things were not good during those two months. 

And also the unemployment website said to keep track of all work search activities because they might randomly request a history of your work search activities but to not upload it unless specifically requested. So it was the week of new years and new job postings were still pretty slow so I spent deadass a whole day of 12+ hours making an excel spreadsheet and going back through dice and linkedin and all the other random job applications and documenting every single job I applied for and every interview I went on. There were fucking 500 entries. Not even 2.5 months unemployed and I had 500 work search activities. The minimum to claim unemployment is 3 a week. And I was doing 50 a week (just a cool 17 times more than required) like I was putting the work in on searching for work. It was a major point of pride that I was going so far above and beyond but it also fucked me up that I was putting myself out there so much and not getting any traction. And I remember thinking wow it’d be funny if now that I put all this time into documenting all my work search activities if i would get a job offer because then obviously i wouldn’t claim the unemployment any longer and thus wouldn’t need the list that the work search commission nebulously may or may not ever call for. 

And literally the next day I had an interview go extremely well (all my stories and answers were well honed by the hundred other interviews at this point) and they were in a rush to hire someone by next monday so literally a few hours after the interview they sent me a job offer on like a wednesday and asked if there was anyway to go ahead and do the paperwork and drug test by the end of that week. And I was like well hey i won’t have to interview any more so getting to cancel those freed up my days. So the next day I did all the paperwork online and went in peed in a cup that morning and then had a follow up interview with them that afternoon and they were so impressed that I helped them get this done in their accelerated timeframe that they game me like a $5k raise. I had already signed and submitted the job offer but they voided and sent over one with the increased salary. It’s with an MSP so it’s a company that just does IT for other companies. But it has like the most room for growth possible for someone like me. They have a team of 500k app developers so if i want to start doing that they’ll show me how. But the gig I have right now is a 5 year contract to be the helpdesk guy on site at this union. But we’re outsourcing all the mundane remote helpdesk stuff so I literally just have to do the onsite support but it’s an office of like 20 people. It’s the cushiest gig I’ve ever had. 

First IT job was doing everything for 150 users, then I asked for a raise after 5 years of the same salary and was denied so I moved to that last company and was there for 1 year. It was 250 users that I had to do everything for (that also had a history of ransomware attacks and I overhauled their whole security and then they fucking laid me off that same year wild) but for 10k more. And now it’s 20 people for 20k more. So anyway I’ve been here for a month now. The first couple weeks were really hectic settling in so that’s why I’ve been offline mostly. But incredibly grateful for this opportunity. The whole point of this was to actually say that since I’m working for a union right now the mindsets of my coworkers is such a heelturn than what I’m used to. All my users before have been very entitled old white dudes. So I’m used to having to have them spew random vitriol out of nowhere and having to pretend that their incredibly hurtful words is totally fine. But working for a union is great everyone here is very pro worker. You can leave early if you need to. We were watching a senate hearing and everyone’s rooting for the worker’s rights side and it’s just such a liberating feeling to work somewhere that shares your point of view.

[curestardust]

Dust Watched: Macross Δ Movie 2: Zettai Live!!!

Genres: Action, Mecha, Music, Space // 2h movie // M01 (x)

My experience with this movie could be summed up in a single sentence which is “Slow the fuck down!!”

✧  story  ✧

Obligatory note that I’m not really into Macross or Mecha stuff. I do enjoy it but its plot leaves my brain the second the anime ends, which is kind of a problem when you’re trying to write about a franchise branching across 50 years.

Anyway, this movie is the sequel and ending to the previous one which shows us an Alternate Universe story of the events of the original Macross Delta series.

The biggest problem this movie suffers from is that it tries to tackle about 100 things at once. Character drama, character relationships, character progression, a movie only plot, expanding on the original plot, wrapping up elements of the original plot, wrapping up this movie only plot, referencing the previous franchises, bringing back old characters, introducing new characters, giving character focus to THESE characters, a huge dose of exposition dumping then add a sprinkle space battles in the mix and the flow and tonal shifts of the show felt like *I* was the one sitting in one of the mechas and going at lightspeed.

I feel like I’d need a thesis to talk about the story and not get something wrong so I won’t. All in all, it was your usual affair of Big Bad Mecha needs to be taken down, and then it is. Yay!

✧  characters  ✧

Offta, they really tried to force a lot of things on the characters. The tonal shifts are the worst here; we can go from one scene where Makina is pushing her boobs up against Mirage and they’re goofing around only to then transition into a scene of someone dying a tragic death. A good example of just how much is going on is Bogue; he goes from hating humans still, to losing one of his comrades in battle, to joining up with the humans and taking orders from their commander. All the while, we basically see no reaction from him to all this besides one or two side comments. They try to give Mirage a plotline as well, and it... I mean it’s alright? RIP to all Hayate/Mirage shippers out there tho. And speaking of...

Freyja, oh my dear girl. Freyja (and Hayate’s) plotline gets the most focus even though with everything going on their scenes have a lot less impact than they should have had.

<spoiler> I almost was about to say that the last scene was truly heartbreaking but they pussied out. BRO!!! Show me her passing on properly! Her vanishing into the wind in her lover’s arms would’ve been so impactful but before that can happen they just show the credits? Why?? This an AU, you don’t have to do the “did-she-or-didn’t-she” game here, she is alive in the original series, so just commit to it! <spoiler>

Oh right, almost forgot about them. Yami_Q_Ray, who are even on the cover, went really underutilized which is a big shame. Would’ve loved to see more of them.

✧  art  ✧

The art was also veeery wonky most of the time. The background art were gorgeous, the mechs looked good enough I guess (I don’t know anything about mechs) but the characters... in some scenes they looked like paper cutouts pasted on a background. They lacked detail and depth. The animation was the same. Weird and janky. The CGI looked the best (the inro sequence of Walküre was a treat). The battles were really hard to follow too.

✧  sound ✧

Fantastic as usual. Macross has always been about the music and I’m glad that at least that didn’t disappoint.

✧  overview ✧

In conclusion, I feel like they spent 90% of the budget on the 10 minute long Macross F short in the beginning of the movie. Which I didn’t talk about cause I genuinly have no clue what was going on but damn did it look great.

My Rating: 5/10

[sheacouleecametoslay]

Season 1 (2009)

Yeah, this season has certainly aged like milk. There's very little about Season 1 that resembles Season 14. Everything feels so low budget here. The show looks a vintage 1970s porn movie that was filmed in Ru's basement. The challenges are meh - especially that Destiny's Child one. I mean the first mini-challenge involves the queens doing glamour shots against cars, and it looks like it was filmed in a Wendy's parking lot. Also the Vaseline filter makes it hard to appreciate the runway looks. Ru has this serenely calm voice compared to modern seasons that makes the whole thing feel like a fever dream. And the Werk Room is so small. Not to mention the season is painfully short, so it doesn't feel like I got properly fall in love with the queens. The Makeover had the worst judging imo, but what else is new. Queens Ranking: 9. Jade Just something about her attitude was off-putting to me. She was the most forgettable in the Oprah challenge. And then she got was eliminated because she touched Rebecca during the lip sync. A shame since Jade probably should've won that one. 8. Victoria "Porkchop" Parker She's an icon in the community to this day for being the first person ever booted from the series. And she seemed nice enough on the show. But that runway look in the premiere was terrible - she really brought a bucket of what looked like cream corn??? and then she stumbled around stage during the lip sync. Tragic. 7. Rebecca Glasscock How she made final 3 is still a mystery to the fandom. I understand the reasoning for why she won the Makeover challenge, since her and partner wore the exact same outfit, but those outfits were so basic! I felt for her when she got emotional talking about HIV in that one challenge though. But then she walked off AGAIN during the F3 music video challenge and I was over it. 6. Akashia What a trainwreck. She was so bad as the team leader during episode 2. She fumbled the choreo. And she fell over the runway. But I guess she was the first ever lip sync assassin, even if she beat two people who weren't really trying. 5. Tammie Brown Quite possibly the strangest person I've ever seen on this show (which will be reflected even more in my AS1 ranking). The way she talked back to Ru during the reunion was certainly a moment. But that lip sync was so bad and her costume was falling apart during that challenge... when she was the one in charge of costumes. 4. Shannel She seemed cold, serious, competitive, and overconfident. But I can appreciate what she brought to the season. I liked some of her looks, especially the one in episode 3. And her juggling on the runway to save herself from the bottom was LOL. Her "quitting" the competition was a memorable moment too; as was her headpiece falling off during her lip sync. Also lol at her talking too much in those challenges. 3. Ongina My favourite in the early season and the first ever "shock" elimination in the show's history. It took being in the bottom 2 against the eventful winner for her to leave (it was the episode where Ru had to walk off stage to think over the decision). It's always the Makeover challenges that create a speed bump for the front runners. But yeah, loved her style on the runway. She had some of my favourite looks this season. 2. Nina Flowers She grew on more and more as the season went along. I love her aesthetic, it felt very unique for the season. She had my favourite entrance look too. Her confusing "Hit TV" with "HIV" was certainly a moment though. 1. BeBe Zahara Benet Season 1 got it right with the winner. Ongina might have been my initial fave, but Bebe really sold me by the end. She's fabolous. She had the best runway looks, including the episode 3 Ru-veal, which was my favourite look of the season. And her verse in the "Cover Girl" rumix kinda served? I think she helped elevate the runways for future seasons too. And she won the Oprah challenge, which was the only comedy challenge this season had. I don't think she should've been in the bottom for the Makeover either. Favourite entrance: Nina Flowers Challenge ranking: 1. Drag on a Dime (Design) 2. Channelling Oprah (Improv) 3. Mac Viva-Glam (Advert) 4. "Cover Girl" music video 5. Absolut Ball 6. Makeover 7. Destiny's Child girl group battle (Choreo) Lip Sync ranking: 1. BeBe Zahara Benet vs Ongina ("Stronger") 2. Akashia vs Shannel ("Greatest Love of All") 3. BeBe Zahara Benet vs Nina Flowers ("Cover Girl (Put the Bass in Your Walk)") 4. Jade vs Rebecca Glasscock ("Would I Lie To You?") 5. Rebecca Glasscock vs Shannel ("Praise You") 6. Akashia vs Tammie Brown ("We Break the Dawn") 7. Akashia vs Victoria "Porkchop" Parker ("Supermodel")

[adamwatchesmovies]

Prehysteria! (1993)

Do you ever feel like going back and revisiting that one obscure movie you saw as a kid that no one else has ever heard of but you know for sure exists? I distinctly remember seeing Prehysteria! as a child. Well, at least one of the three movies. All I remembered were those awesome miniature dinosaurs. I couldn’t recall ANYTHING about the plot… and there’s a reason for that.

Slimy museum curator Rico Sarno (Stephen Lee) returns from an expedition in South America with five mysterious eggs. When he accidentally swaps coolers with Frank Taylor (Brett Cullen), the widowed raisin farmer and his kids - Monica (Samantha Mills) and Jerry (Austin O’Brien) - discover that their dog is now the proud mother of 5 miniature - but fully-grown - dinosaurs!

The film is basically a mix of Gremlins and Jurassic Park but without any edge and only the blandest of human characters to keep the plot moving. I’m sorry, 6-year-old Adam, but this movie is bad. It isn’t devoid of merit, but it's sub-par entertainment, even for kids.

The best - and really, only redeeming - element of Prehysteria! is the dinosaurs. Even then, a lot more could’ve been done with them. Jerry and Monica’s new pets - Tyrannosaurus Elvis, Brachiosaurus Paula, Stegosaurus Jagger, Chasmosaurus Hammer and Geosternbergia Madonna - are pretty neat in a few ways. Of course, there had to be a t-rex and I wouldn't consider a stegosaurus an obscure species of dinosaur, but the rest are fairly unique, which will please amateur archeologists plenty. The creatures are brought to life with terrific puppetry and stop-motion effects. Considering the film’s low-budget (which shows whenever the use of a green-screen is required), the pint-sized thunder-lizards look great. If only the beasts were given any personality. At the end of the day, it hardly feels like you get to know them at all. It's a shame because the humans who adopt them? They’re complete throwaways who hardly convey the genuine sense of wonder you’d expect from meeting actual dinosaurs, miniature or not.

The unique animals are thrown in a plot that’s so generic it’s hard to care. Rico Sarno is a one-dimensional greedy… museum curator? Huh? The only ones stupider than him are the two goons he hires to help him steal the dinos: Ritchie (Stuart Fratkin) and Louis (Tony Longo). They’re so dumb even a kid could tell the peril in this film is non-existent. The kids are a bit better, I guess, but they’re just typical “younger brother who doesn’t like his older sister” type. The dad is another kind of enigma. He sells fossils to the museum - an opportunity to make doe eyes at Vicki (Colleen Morris), who works at the museum’s desk - but has no interest in dinosaurs whatsoever. It just feels weird. How does he even know what he’s digging up if he has no interest in archeology? I guess we can talk about her too. It’s no spoiler that she ends up on the Taylors’ side against meanie Mr. Sarno when she learns he wants to exploit the dinosaurs for money. As soon as you learn Frank is widowed, you know that means they’ll end up romantically involved. There are no surprises at all and the conclusion is so hurried some of it doesn’t make sense.

You might wonder if I’m upset at a “treasured memory” getting debunked. I’m not. I had a good time with the movie back then and I had a bit of fun with this rewatch… if only because it made me appreciate how much my taste has evolved. I think the funniest thing about Prehysteria! is that while all of the dinosaurs are named after famous musicians, only Elvis contributes to the soundtrack. Even then, it might’ve been an imitator. This movie does not have the budget for Madonna, not by a long shot. All it had was the money to make the dinosaurs look good. That's not enough. (September 25, 2022)

[silverspeirs]

i finished masters of the air and i have many many thoughts.... and i will do my best to write them down.

disclaimer: i know the show is a fictional depiction of real life events and real life men who fought in wwii. i don't mean any disrespect to the real people who are being portrayed in the show. this is merely my impressions on the fictional show produced by apple tv+.

continues under the cut because this ended up being a long post.

let's start with the positives: i loved the show and was crying at the end of the last episode. the visuals are gorgeous, the actors are all amazing in their roles, and the first few episodes are perfect at setting up the story/setting. a sentimental plus was that i watched the show with my parents, who are also both history buffs, and finished it close to the 79th anniversary of VE day. additionally, my dad, who is a pilot, told me all the lingo and processes used when they were flying is accurate.

i also loved seeing the character development of rosie and croz. they seemed so unassuming to me when they were introduced, and ended up being two of the strongest characters in the show.

the issues i have with the show can be separated in 3 sections: script+editing, time/timing+budget, and the amount of moving parts.

script + editing: while the show is solid on average, the script has some issues, which were made worse by the editing. characters and plot points that were introduced on one episode were never referenced to again in later episodes. for example, what happened to colonel harding? he's gone to london on one episode and on the next, his replacement is replaced and we never see him again; quinn and bailey get some air time escaping from belgium and then a quick mention to never be heard from again... which brings me to my next issue:

too many moving parts: the show has so many characters to explore and show in only 9 episodes. it has too many storylines it is trying to follow, and it starts losing itself after a while. hey, let's start with setting up the show: here you have a bunch of pilots who are all super cool, but we won't give you too much information on them. you have to keep watching to find out more (fair). now, buckle up because we're going on a few missions. alright, now we're going to bring on more characters! and we need to take a break from all this flying, so we're going to the flak house and to cambridge (which i concede, this episode is important for developing rosie and croz). okay, we're back to flying, but we're also going to go to a POW camp to see how our first leads are doing. and HEY! we have another company of pilots we want to introduce to you!! (i know the tuskegee pilots were introduced later to fit in with the POW scenes but i really wish they had been brought on earlier). oh man, we're running out of episodes, we gotta do a big time jump! now we're on d-day. now buck and bucky are trying to escape. and now the war is over.

i know that the show encompasses a long time period - basically 2 years of the war - but i'd rather them show us less things, and show them well, than try to fit as much as possible in 9 episodes (which goes back to being a script+editing problem. they could have used one more episode).

finally, time/timing and budget: on this post , it is said that MOTA ran out of budget, which is why some choices were made. starting production in 2021 meant that COVID measures were in place, and it also meant that production had to be halted when crew/cast tested positive. there's also a 3 year gap from when production started and when the show was released, meaning that the show sat with the editors for a long time, which is not necessarily a good thing.

it also feels like the show ran out of steam after episode 5. that's a shame, because the first episodes show so much potential.

i have some other issues with the show, mainly how they didn't have the actors on the background like BoB had, but this post i referenced before encapsulates my thoughts pretty well, so i won't repeat it.

to end on a positive note, the directors and the actors did a wonderful job with what they had.

all this to say: i enjoyed watching mota. will i rewatch it? absolutely. did i like this more than i would have because im a big hbo war fan? for sure. i just wish they had worked better with the wonderful stories they had to tell.

[37-children-of-the-dreams]

I found one thing, I guess you may be interested in that, in japanese translation, in description of episode with Dax's story it was said in the end "Who are Dax's parents?" But only question this episode answers is "Who killed Dax's parents?". And we did saw only one of Dax's parents, not both... Thats weird thing. Also, in japanese translation, it said that " Six has 5 brothers including dead and alive".

Also interesting that even if monsuno had low budget, still no one had same launch animations, I mean really same, except 3 persons. Chase and Six are two ones here, and them cause Six is exacly Chase's clone. And there is third person - Dawnmaster. Also it was some kinda hint to Six's appearance, when Chase had vision when first met Droog, he met himself but red and holded hands with them. And so we didn't saw Dawnmaster's face, even skintone. Even his voice. That's weird. I mean, one of Six's special things that links him to Chase is that same launch. But Dawnmaster was before Six who did that. And some things weren't made to life, so this could be one of them.

If you don't feel good to answer, it's ok. Just wanted to share with you these theories, I think they're interesting

I guess Dax found both his parents and we never saw him bury his father since the episode was getting a little dark for a kid’s show.

As for Six having living brothers, I wish Monsuno had more seasons because Klipse made a ton of plot holes for the cast and most will never be answered.

I have been rewatching Monsuno to keep myself entertained while sick, and just watched Dawnmaster’s episodes. And you’re not wrong if you think Dawnmaster is another Klipse clone.

Dawnmaster’s color scheme is like those of Klipse even if he as a Core Tech core, he’s soft spoken, but sounds like he has a speech impediment, and he does have the same launch stance as Chase. Six has the Klipse coloration, is soft spoken and monotone at times, and due to being Chase’s clone has the same launch stance. They could be related, but we’ll never know.

The sad part of this theory is that Dawnmaster hasn’t been seen since season 1, and it’s really a shame because it would made a huge plot twist to show he is a clone and one of Six’s brothers. Like think of what it could have done to Six’s psyche and where the storyline would have gone if Dawnmaster had helped Six escape their father.

As for Six being foreshadowed in the episode with Droog, maybe it was just artistic choice since Chase was dealing with horrible visions and needed to reassure himself that everything was going to be alright, but it’d made a great foreshadowing since Six did help him and Lock become closer and lead Chase to save the world without killing off the Monsuno.

[absolutepokemontrash]

MC’s Half Demon and They Look Awfully Familiar

(Part 3! Starring Mini Mammon and Mini Asmo!)

Part 1 Part 2 Lessons 1-5 Underground Tomb special Group Retreat Lessons 10-12 Part 4

MC names:

Lucifer’s kid=L!MC | Mammon’s kid=M!MC | Asmo’s kid=A!MC

Why did bad things happen to good people? Well... Lucifer being a good person is up to interpretation. He hadn’t done anything too heinous recently, his instruments of torture were collecting dust for goodness sake! So why oh why was he staring down two half demon children who looked suspiciously like two of his brothers?

The first kid to step forward was Mammon’s without a doubt, but their general demeanour was very different from their father’s. Perhaps their other parent had done a good job-

“What the fuck was that?!”

Never mind. The kid had Mammon’s pottymouth.

The other child surveyed the scene with a nervousness that their suspected parent never possessed. The kid’s gaze fell on Lucifer, their eyes began to glow ever so slightly. “Uh-um...” the kid cleared their throat. “Someone explain what’s going on!”

Was this child seriously trying to use manipulation powers on Lucifer? He almost laughed at the mere idea of someone trying. The child didn’t even seem to be aware that they were doing it. When their question was met with blank stares, they instantly shrank back and practically hid behind the first half demon. Despite the severe self-esteem difference, this kid was Asmodeus’.

Lucifer’s own child cleared their throat and smiled. “Welcome to the Devildom!”

The Uncle That Looks Like he Has his Shit Together but he Leaves the Reunion Drunk off his Rocker (Lucifer)

Ah shit here we go again-

Okay- okay. Normally he’d scold L!MC for taking Diavolo’s line, but Dia had recovered from his shock and was now gushing over the new exchange students like an excited puppy.

“Okay... L!MC you’re going to need to share your room.”

“What?! Why?!”

“Unless Belphie is willing to give up the attic as a nap spot-”

“OVER MY DEAD BODY!”

“You’re sharing your room.”

RAD was buzzing with gossip for the entire first month of the second attempt at the exchange program. The threats of being eaten were once again stamped out very quickly.

(Special thanks to L!MC for being a good bodyguard)

Now, Lucifer didn’t exactly know what to expect when it came to the child of his favourite brother. Mammon was a dumbass, but this kid... this kid...

Was smart.

For the first time in Lucifer’s very long life he felt compelled to place someone in a higher echelon than himself.

Mammon’s child managed to successfully budget that dumpster fire of a house. On the first fucking day. Not only that. This kid managed to skim FIVE THOUSAND GRIMM OFF THE TOP AND THE BUDGET STILL WORKED! WHAT KIND OF BULLSHIT-

Lucifer and Mammon thanked whatever spirit was watching over them because they truly believed their financial woes were over.

Shame that M!MC also spent their money on dumb stuff they didn’t need. Like father like child.

It’s no secret that Lucifer does have a bit of a soft spot for Asmo, I mean, who doesn’t love Asmo? But A!MC was a blessing sent right from the Celestial Realm.

They were just... too sweet. Way too sweet. Lucifer was actively getting cavities just being near them.

Anyone who bothered A!MC and M!MC during the first month ended up getting... uh... suspended.

(We can assume the threat of suspension would have extended to those who bothered L!MC but all the lesser demons were already terrified of them.)

Normally when Lucifer called someone into his study it was to lecture them for at least four hours and then send them to their rooms, but he was having quite the difficult time actually being upset with M!MC and A!MC.

A!MC looked close to tears and M!MC just stared right back at Lucifer with little to no fear in their eyes.

“Starting a fight during the first week of school is not how I expected the exchange students to behave.” Lucifer pinched the bridge of his nose, and prepared to continue the lecture, when he heard a sniffle. There wasn’t enough Demonus in the entire Devildom...

“I-I’m s—sorry...” A!MC sniffled, quickly wiping at their eyes. “Th-they were being r-really scary and we did-didn’t know what else to do...”

“So you threw them out of a window?”

“I threw them out of the window.” M!MC huffed. “They were bein’ a dick.”

“So you threw them out of a window?”

“That um...” A!MC mumbled. “That’s not all... I may have... told them to stick their head in a toilet first...”

“You made them stick their head in a toilet,” Lucifer turned to M!MC. “And then you threw them out of a window?”

“Yes.” M!MC and A!MC replied. Lucifer downed the rest of his glass of Demonus and debated whether or not it would be a show of weakness to slam his forehead into the desk in front of the children.

Lucifer looked between the two for a moment, then shook his head and sighed. “It’s my job to deal with threats to the exchange students, not yours.” Lucifer stood in front of the two, he rested his hands on their heads and gave them a quick pat, before knocking their heads together. “Next time someone bothers you, tell me. If I hear even a whisper of you two getting into another fight, I’m hanging you from the ceiling. Is that clear?”

A!MC and M!MC looked at each other, then back at Lucifer and nodded. “Yes sir!”

“Good.” Lucifer removed his hand from their heads. “Now shoo.”

Flying lessons for the two of them went way quicker than it did for L!MC, mainly because L!MC was a way better teacher.

As much as Lucifer loved his newly found niblings, he couldn’t show it too much. Outward softness was reserved for L!MC and L!MC only. M!MC and A!MC were stuck with silent acts of affection.

Every once and a while a little present or two would end up in M!MC or A!MC’s possession. Some ice cream money for M!MC when they blew their part of the budget on fancy sunglasses, a multiplayer video game that the three half-demons could play together, new shoes when A!MC accidentally ruined their’s...

He’s a good uncle. A scary uncle. But a good uncle. ^_^

(Don’t tell him I said that, I’m still in trouble for advertising Mammon’s escape Go Fund Me and I don’t want to have to write the rest of this HC hanging upside down.)

He’s Not Like the Other Dads, he’s a Cool Dad! (Mammon)

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA (Fear)

He’s a dad?! HE’S TO YOUNG TO BE A DAD! Hang on- he’s over five thousand years old...

Oh would you look at that! His kid pulled out a calculator.

...his annual income? Uh... why do you- HEY! WHAT’S WITH THAT FACE?!

M!MC puffed out their cheek as they continued to add the ever growing list of numbers into the calculator. Mammon was trying to get a peak at what they were calculating. M!MC suddenly looked up and practically lit up the room with their smile. Aw, their fangs were growing in!

They had a devilishly charming smile, just like their pop! A real chip off the old block! It almost brought a tear to Mammon’s eye and he actually felt compelled to give this kid all the money he had on him. Maybe even his Rolex too!

“Mammon, Avatar of Greed,” M!MC said sweetly. “My... dad.”

“Yep! That’s uh... that’s me!” Mammon awkwardly ruffled his kid’s hair, the kid laughed good naturedly.

M!MC’s sweet as honey smile flipped from elated to malicious in a manner of nanoseconds. “You owe over thirteen years of child support. Dad.”

Everyone say thank you to Lucifer and Diavolo for getting M!MC to compromise and not try and sue their father.

If you thought Mammon spoiled L!MC you’ve got another thing coming. Mammon’s wallet never stood a chance against his kid.

Poor Goldie, press F to pay respects.

Mammon also tried to teach A!MC and M!MC to drive, M!MC has no regard for their safety, the safety of others, or the laws of the road, buuuuuuuut they manage to get the car back with no dents and no property damage bills are being delivered to the house sooooo...

A!MC can drive fine... it’s just that they adhere to literally every law known to demonkind, which means neither Mammon or Asmo are allowed to open up the sunroof and do that movie thing where they pop their heads out and yell something. ITS NOT SAFE!

Our beloved dummy also tried to teach his kid how to play poker, with... limited success.

“Aw, come on kiddo.” Mammon smirked, flicking his kid on the nose. “Your poker face is awful, I can also see your cards from here.”

M!MC growled and held their cards closer to their face. “My poker face is fine!” It was in fact, not fine.

Mammon scratched his head and thought for a moment. Was he sure that this kid was his? I mean, they weren’t good at poker, had terrible luck in blackjack and roulette, and could barely understand the rules of craps. Craps! While he was lamenting the loss of possible gambling winnings, an idea hit Mammon at a thousand miles an hour.

“Hey kid, you’re damn good at math like your great and amazin’ father, have you ever thought about learnin’ how to count cards?”

Fancy outfits on, hair done (sorta), car ready, the two were off to the casino after quite the intense training montage. It appeared that casinos in the Devildom allowed children inside... Diavolo should really fix that.

“Okay M!MC, you remember what to do, right?”

“Yes. Remember the signal, and if someone catches on, deny deny deny.”

Mammon gave his kid a slap on the back. “Damn straight! You got this, bud.”

As the night dragged on, M!MC and Mammon had made their weight in money, paper money, they had made a SHIT ton is what I’m saying. Tragically, neither the Avatar of Greed or his child had any sense to leave before their luck crashed like the Stock Market in 1929.

They were both Icarus, and they were playing chicken with the sun... and by 3 am they were also playing chicken with security.

“GO GO GO!” Mammon shouted as he and M!MC sprinted towards the car, the night’s winnings in hand.

“I think I lost a shoe!” M!MC gasped as they scrambled into the car, security on their heels.

“I’ll buy you new shoes JUST PUT ON YOUR SEATBELT!”

Re-enacting every Fast and the Furious movie in twenty minutes was how that lovely night of father/child bonding should have ended... until they got home and realized they were locked out.

“The window to my room!” M!MC whispered, pointing up at their window. “It’s usually unlocked, we can climb up to get to it.”

“Good idea!”

M!MC tucked the bag full of their precious money under their arm and began the climb to their window, their father close behind. They had almost made it, they were so close, M!MC could literally touch the window-

The window swung open and the smiling faces of L!MC and A!MC greeted them.

“Oh my, it looks like we have some delinquents breaking curfew~.” L!MC cooed, resting their head on their hand.

“You shouldn’t be gambling this late! A-and your accessories don’t match!” A!MC huffed.

“Oi! L!MC, A!MC! What are ya doin’ up this late! It’s not good for ya!” Mammon whisper-yelled.

“My sleep schedule should be the least of your concerns right now, right A!MC?” L!MC elbowed A!MC, who nodded enthusiastically.

“Yep! Those who break curfew are hung from the ceiling by their toes.” A!MC shuddered.

M!MC rolled their eyes and stuck out their hand. “Come on L!MC! Let us in! You should listen to your older cousin!”

Upon hearing M!MC pull the older cousin card L!MC smiled deviously, grabbing both of M!MC’s hands. “Of course, dear cousin.” They leaned in. “Long live the king!”

L!MC shoved M!MC downward, Mammon caught them, but lost his own grip and they both lost hold of the money, which fell out of the bag and onto the ground like snow. Paper snow...

Oh well, at least Mammon and M!MC landed in some of the bushes...

“Ya know,” Mammon said as the money fell around them. “I’ve had dreams where this has happened.”

“Wow,” M!MC smiled. “Me too!”

Yep. This was his kid alright.

Not all his father/kid time revolved around money, it also revolved around both of them trying to avoid horror movie night without making it look like they were chickening out.

“Okay, I’ll fake a medical emergency!”

“Kid, no! They’ll never believe that!”

Since A!MC had their father’s eye for fashion and none of the judgemental comments, the kid became Mammon’s unofficial style coach.

“U-um... I hate to say it but those shoes don’t match with the rest of the outfit, the silhouette is confusing...”

“What’re ya talkin’ about? I look fantastic!”

“Are you blind? You look like a thrift store threw up on you.”

“Who invited you, Asmo?!”

“I’m here to support A!MC! You’re doing great by the way, sweetie!”

He may have cried a little when M!MC was able to fly without help... sniffle... they grow up so fast...

Oh- oh fuck they both crashed into the tree-

Oh My God he Actually Showed Up?! (Levi)

That... that couldn’t be real life! A shut-in’s worst nightmare! More people he needed to talk to!

Considering Mammon and Asmo’s track record with taking care of his things, Levi was incredibly hesitant to invite the two to binge anime with him and L!MC.

It seemed that the two normies inherited their fathers’s level of respect for closed doors. What I’m saying is the two crashed anime night.

“I have never seen such bullshit before.”

M!MC’s hands were stuffed in about five pairs of socks each, effectively turning their hands into useless nubs.

“You be quiet! This is to make sure that you don’t take any of my things and try and sell them on Akuzon!” Levi hissed, turning back to make sure his figurines were safe from the mini Mammon. A!MC was standing awkwardly next to L!MC, who was sitting in Levi’s gaming chair reading manga.

“So what are we going to watch..?” A!MC piped up. “I haven’t really watched much anime but I did watch Digimon...”

“I was more of a Beyblade kid.” M!MC hit their sock-stumps together to make a thumping noise.

Levi looked like he was ready to have a stroke. “L-listen! Those are gateway anime! You two need to watch proper anime! Non-dubbed anime!”

A!MC let out a shriek and stared at their reflection in a very shiny looking gundam figurine. “Have I been wearing off colour lip gloss the entire day?! O-oh no... I’m a mess!”

Levi let out a strangled wail and snatched the gundam out of A!MC’s hands. “D-don’t touch that! It’s worth more than a house!”

“It is?!” M!MC perked up and tried to wrestle their way out of their sock-gloves.

“Don’t make me stick you in a straight jacket...” Levi growled. He turned to L!MC with a pleading look on his face. “Please make them stop...”

L!MC grinned deviously and closed their book. “Of course I’ll help you, if we watch season two of The Promised Neverland.”

Levi shrieked and nearly pulled out his hair then and there. “It’s manga divergent! MANGA DIVERGENT! THEY SKIPPED SO MANY ARCS!”

M!MC and A!MC continued to wreak both purposeful and accidental havoc on Levi’s room, he was just about ready to summon Lotan then and there when L!MC shrugged.

“The ball’s in your court, Levi.” L!MC leaned back in the chair and resumed reading their manga.

Levi’s willpower shattered the moment he heard something fall off one of his cabinets. “WE CAN WATCH WHATEVER YOU WANT JUST MAKE THEM STOOOOOP!”

Quick as a flash, L!MC was out of the chair and had both M!MC and A!MC by the ears.

“HEY!” L!MC growled. “STOP ACTING LIKE IDIOTS OR SO HELP ME GRANDFATHER YOU TWO WON’T LIVE TO SEE GRADUATION!”

M!MC and A!MC became the most well behaved children in the Devildom after that... and L!MC and Levi got to watch their anime in peace.

Okay, Levi wasn’t heartless, he loved his lame normie niblings. They were just very very loud...

Though, M!MC was very good at finding merch for way lower prices... and A!MC actually really liked some of the anime they watched... Maybe they weren’t so bad.

M!MC’s attempts to budget that financial dumpster fire of an otaku was not going well, at least until M!MC convinced Lucifer to dangle concert tickets in front of Levi like a carrot on a stick until he agreed to do his best to stay within the monthly budget.

Levi had learned his lesson from L!MC’s flying lessons and steered clear of them, but luck was not on his side. The ONE time he willingly stepped outside of the house...

Both M!MC and A!MC crashed right into him.

The Uncle With the Cat You Never See and Aren’t Really Allowed to Pet. (Satan)

Oh fuck him sideways the house was going to be so much louder... Say goodbye to his quiet reading time...

On the bright side, the look of pure disbelief and exhaustion on Lucifer’s face gave Satan the biggest rush of serotonin he’d ever had in his life.

To be honest, he got on well with Asmo, and he... well it’s Mammon.

Could have been worse.

Could have been ANOTHER child of Lucifer.

“So... who do you think did it?” M!MC asked as the opening to the fourth episode of the murder documentary they were watching began. “I think it was the sister.”

“On what evidence do you make that assumption?” Satan asked.

M!MC shrugged. “Chick’s shifty.”

“I um... I think they disappeared on their own accord.” A!MC murmured. “I mean, so far it seemed the two’s home lives sucked...”

“Good theory.” Satan nodded to himself. “But both of you are wrong, it was very clearly the mother and the neighbour.”

“On what evidence do you make that assumption?” L!MC asked, imitating Satan’s voice. Detective Toe Beans was sprawled out on their lap.

Satan glowered at L!MC and leaned over to scratch Bean behind the ears. “The step-mother and neighbour are backing up each other’s alibis and they have a motive, access to a possible murder weapon, and a way of disposing of the corpses.”

L!MC rolled their eyes. “That’s a load of crap. It was just the step-mother. The mother had the motive, she and the father were on the outs, she wanted the father’s inheritance all to herself so she got rid of his kids.”

“How many more episodes of this are there?” M!MC asked. “This seems like a really dragged out way of just saying: I don’t know.”

“Sh! They’re explaining possible corpse disposal methods!” Satan hissed.

The four of them traded theories until the documentary series eventually ended with an unsatisfying ‘we dunno’.

“This is such shit...” M!MC muttered. “How have they managed to fill eight episodes with all these leads and evidence and the case is still unsolved?!”

“It’s because everyone involved was incompetent and stupid.” Satan sighed.

“You know,” L!MC smirked. “With all the true crime stuff the four of us watch, we could create the perfect crime.”

“We really could.” M!MC nodded in agreement.

“Using A!MC’s powers no one would suspect us...” Satan rubbed his chin thoughtfully.

“Uh...” A!MC shifted uncomfortably. “On an unrelated note... I’m going to go...”

As A!MC scampered out of the room, L!MC turned to Satan and M!MC.

“There’s always the one weak person in the group who’s not down with murder.”

“A sad truth.”

“Hang on I thought we were talking about theft or something-”

Satan and M!MC are surprising study buddies, hell, they even help Mammon study. Or... it’s more accurate to say that they try to help Mammon study.

A!MC is good company, they’re quiet when they read, unlike most people in the house who felt the need to provide commentary on every single event that occurs in the book.

After proving to be quite useless in L!MC’s flight lessons, he just reminded the two new half demons to wear protective padding.

The Hot Single Dad That’s In Every Romcom That Features a Child (Asmo)

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA (excitement)

Oh... his... father... HE WAS A DILF NOW-

He practically vaulted out of his seat to coo and fuss over his new found hellspawn, they were just SO CUTE!

Their wings were just like his! So adorable! Oh and those little horns! They were so cute Asmo just might have combusted then and there.

Of course, he couldn’t combust without finding out which of his flings had made such an adorably shy mini-him.

“Ah! I remember that party!” Asmo squee-ed as he looked at a picture of A!MC’s parent. “They looked so hot in that outfit I swear I was completely-”

“Asmodeus.” Lucifer grumbled. “That’s a child in front of you.”

“Oh! Right! Mind if I call your ren, A!MC?” Asmo asked, ruffling their kid’s hair. “I want to see if they remember me fondly!”

As Asmo chattered with A!MC’s parent about just how adorable and perfect their kid turned out, Asmo leaned over to A!MC to ask a question.

“A!MC, I know this is sudden but how do you feel about getting a sib-”

“ASMODEUS IF YOU FINISH THAT SENTENCE I WILL FEED YOU TO CERBERUS!”

“Tsk. Rude.”

It’s safe to say Asmo adores his kid. I mean, they’re 50% him, how could he not.

He didn’t exactly have experience with the whole... being a big part of his kids’s life thing. Sure he held the unofficial record for most kids but that was because effective birth control hadn’t been invented at the time when he was allowed to run rampant in the human world, not because he was an A+ dad.

None of that mattered! He was going to be a 10/10 dad to A!MC!

They were so shy... so... mouse-like...

“Um... dad?” A!MC awkwardly twiddled there thumbs as they stood in the doorway to their father’s room. The sweet smell of whatever essential oil was being spread with the diffuser did next to nothing to calm the poor half-demon’s nerves.

Asmo popped his head out of his walk-in closet with a sparkling smile. “Yes, child of mine?”

“I um, just wanted to ask...” A!MC was desperately trying to stave off an oncoming stutter-spiral. “H-h-how- *ahem* how do- ugh...”

A!MC steeled their face and straightened their posture.

“How do I be confident like you?!” They blurted that out a little too loud for comfort, but Asmo’s near-immediate joy quashed any embarrassment A!MC was feeling.

“You want to be like little ol’ me?” Asmo gushed, clearly trying to hide just how flattered he was. “Well, of course you do! Your dad’s got your back. So first what we’re going to do-”

The Avatar of Lust had done the stereotypical early 2000s movie makeover many times before, but never with so much enthusiasm. His kid’s style was fine, it wasn’t a lack of pizazz either, it was the lack of confidence in the pizazz.

“Okay, now stand up straight.”

A!MC straightened their back as much as they could.

“Perfect! Chin up, shoulders back, and there you go!”

A!MC didn’t look too different on account that Asmo felt like their fashion sense was perfect, but dear not-old dad coached MC on a new walk, better posture, and Asmo filled their arms with about seven boxes of self-care supplies.

“What’s all this for?” A!MC asked, shifting the weight of the boxes slightly so they could actually see their dad.

“That, A!MC, is all the stuff you need to have confidence.” Asmo explained. “It’s not required of course, but it sure does help.”

“I’m not sure I follow...”

“Oh sweetie, it’s simple really. When you take care of yourself, you feel better, and when you feel better, you look better, and when you look better and feel better, your confidence skyrockets!” Asmo shifted some of the boxes A!MC was carrying around so they could stand up straighter and not be held down by the weight of the self-care arsenal. “Good posture stops your back from hurting, dressing decently helps you feel better about your appearance, as does taking care of your skin, aaaaaand all this will culminate in you being your best!”

A!MC still looked a bit skeptical, but they nodded anyway.

“Remember MC!” Asmo said as he led MC back to their room to help them sort their new stuff. “Confidence in yourself doesn’t happen overnight, so don’t let Mammon try and sell you a fix-all potion because it’s just boiled Gatorade.”

“O-okay- wait did you just say-”

“Yes, boiled Gatorade.” Asmo shuddered. “Let’s not talk about that.”

Dear uncle Asmo? A financial dumpster fire?! It’s more likely than you’d think.

Sure, Asmo’s got a job and makes his own money, but Geez Louise... one demon does not need that much hand cream! Or that many questionable Akuzon packages that everyone is too afraid to touch...

M!MC had their work cut out for them is what I’m trying to say.

Of course... once M!MC realized what a lost cause getting Asmo to stop with the obsessive bath bomb purchases was and a few too many insults were thrown at M!MC’s dear dad... some of Asmo’s things went uh... “missing”

But would you look at that! No one went over-budget!

Even though their dads have a fierce party related rivalry, A!MC and M!MC get along great. It’s very wholesome.

The Uncle That Helps You Pester Whoever is in Charge of the Food at the Family Reunion About Dessert (Beel)

Yay! More kids :)

Do you think any of them know how to cook? No? Okay... :(

Beel adores his new niblings with all his heart and soul, and Belphie’s out of the attic and is able to meet them with everyone else this time! Yay!

I didn’t mention this in the other parts- but Beel totally gave L!MC piggyback rides whenever they asked, but now that two more kids have arrived... it’s now a fight to be tall.

But yea- kids like uncle Beel. Strong contender for favourite uncle.

“Do you think this is right?” A!MC asked as they fiddled with the settings on the stovetop.

“No clue. Do we put the cheese on while the meat is cooking or do we wait until after?” M!MC asked, they flipped through multiple cheeseburger recipes on their DDD, their frustration growing. “Hang on- do we have a deep fryer?”

A!MC rummaged around the cupboards and shelves for a good fifteen minutes and came back empty handed. “No, but I’ve seen videos of people making fries without a deep fryer, I think we just need to heat up vegetable oil and drop the potatoes in.”

After setting up the make-shift deep fryer, the two cousins carefully dropped the first fry into the oil, then screamed like banshees when some oil splashed close to their hands.

“Did you get burned?!” M!MC asked, A!MC shook their head.

“No, you?”

“Nah...” M!MC eyed the oil warily. “We should do this one at a time to be safe...”

It was an awkward process, grab potato, place potato, scream, make sure no one is burned, repeat. As... decent as the process was, with both of them manning the deep fryer, no one was manning the patties that were now completely charred.

“What’s going on in here? It smells like Solomon’s cooking.” Beel poked his head into the kitchen and saw two very upset children and the world’s messiest kitchen.

“We’re failures. That’s all...” M!MC murmured.

“We wanted to make lunch for all of us and we ruined it...” A!MC added.

Beel’s heart was set to explode then and there- but his stomach growled. “You tried your best, don’t feel too bad. Let’s get cheeseburgers somewhere else with Belphie.”

M!MC and A!MC nodded enthusiastically as the three of them left the destroyed kitchen behind them.

After Beel had to sling a sleeping Belphie over his shoulder, the now four of them were halfway out the door before they heard L!MC scream bloody murder.

“YOU IDIOTS COME BACK HERE AND CLEAN THIS MESS UP RIGHT NOW!”

M!MC and A!MC made eye contact, then sprinted out the door. “CHEESEBURGERS FIRST!”

A!MC and M!MC probably go to all of Beel’s games like the little super fans they are. Beel is very grateful for the support! :D

Flying lessons? Nnnnnot again. He’s here for moral support and moral support only. And to catch the two babs when they inevitably fall.

The Uncle Who Was Like... Really Racist the Last Time You Saw Him But He’s Not Anymore (Belphie)

So he uh... he didn’t try and kill these two. That already gave the two newbies a better first impression than what he gave to L!MC.

The Anti Lucifer league ALSO grew, just by one member though. A!MC was very easily persuaded to snitch on whatever prank the group concocted.

The attic nap club gained two new members, but Belphie still had to deal with wings hitting him in the face and waking him up. He’d usually return the favour with a swat from his tail.

“M!MC I swear I will throw you out of the window if you kick me again.” Belphie murmured, mashing his face into his pillow.

“Mmmph.” M!MC threw a pillow in Belphie’s direction.

“Quit whining, Belphie.” L!MC huffed. “You’re doing better than me.”

A!MC had attached themselves to L!MC like a sloth to a tree and would not let go or stop drooling. Ah schadenfreude, the best feeling in the galaxy...

“Stop with that look.” L!MC hissed, Belphie snickered. “I’m telling you to quit it because you’ll wake up Beel, and Beel is solving your M!MC problem.”

Belphie turned to see Beel practically crush M!MC into a bone breaking hug in his sleep.

“Should we do something about that?” L!MC yawned.

Belphie smirked his little douchebag smirk. “Eh, let them stew for a few more minutes.”

“Help me...” M!MC rasped.

Out of the three, A!MC is probably the best nap buddy, they bring in their own pillows and don’t hog the blankets.

Belphie is once again at the forefront for taking videos of the flying lessons, at least till M!MC accidentally broke Belphie’s DDD.

Just a friendly reminder, the sleepy cow man would kill for these kids.

Look at them funny and no one will find your body.

Okay! That’s part 3 done! I had to cut Belphie’s and Satan’s short because of post limit stuff, but the stuff with the side characters is coming soon! Also, Mammon would like me to inform all those who donated to his Go Fund Me that you will NOT be getting your money back, he has a kid to deck out in full Gucci now, he needs the cash!

[realcube]

ARCADE

summary ★ she needs to get the action figure that's in the claw machine for her sister’s birthday, so saiki does her the favour of using his a telekinesis to win it...along with a few other favours.

trigger warning ★ gambling, god, swearing, fem!reader & reader has a younger sister

construction on the new arcade near pk academy had finally come to an end. the grand opening was today after school so of course, nendou suggested that they attend as a squad. usually, saiki tried to avoid getting roped into outings like this but for a change, he actually agreed without the need for any further prying. that's because the arcade was attached to a small cinema where they'd be premiering the latest action movie — based on the TV show adaptation of the game — 'Olfana's Story X-2'. as it turns out, a few months after saiki gave the game a shot, it became a craze and a massive hit among speed-runners. so from it's new-found popularity, they developed a TV show series which inevitably flopped so now they have created a movie. only the most elite people among the gaming community were allow to see it before the official release date and they all said it was incredible; but there was not a doubt in saiki's mind that they were being paid to sing it's praise. a crappy game turned into a crappy show, now adapted into a movie was sure to be crappy. so you may be wondering why he even wanted to view the movie if he was set on it being awful. Well, there are two simple answers; curiosity and the mystery. since it was so exclusive, he had yet to overhear spoilers through his telekinesis and he now had a germanium ring in his possession so he could watch the movie in peace. also, having played the game but not seen the show, he was curious to see how bad the movie is going to be and perhaps he'd be able to get a good laugh out of it. but he made the mistake of mentioning his plan to see the movie which screened a few hours after the opening of the arcade, as now kuboyasu, nendou and kaidou were all going to see the movie along with him. In theory, it shouldn't be a problem since he'll have his germanium ring on but in practise, the world seems to be against saiki so one of his friends will probably end up stealing his popcorn or chatting throughout the entire movie. he'll just have to wait and see. kaidou and nendou did not even stop to take breaths as they raced on about how excited they were while they were all walking to the arcade. "i'm sure the movie is going to be sick!" kaidou exclaimed, followed by rapid head nods from nendou as he replied, "yup! And i can't wait to see what sort of games they have!" saiki was a bit excited himself but he didn't care to show it like the others did. but when he saw the vaporwave building covered with bright neon lights come into view, his lips curled into a small smile. though it was short-lived as he noticed the massive queue to get in; it appeared as though they weren't the only ones who had the idea to visit the arcade after school as he noticed many familiar faces standing in line, amongst crowds of others. all of their cheery auras dissipated for a few moments until kuboyasu perked up, approaching the doors to the arcade with a smug smirk, cutting in front of everyone in the line and gesturing for the boys to follow him, "don't worry about the queue, guys. follow me." nendou followed without any further questions but saiki and kaidou were a bit apprehensive. all three of them watched as kuboyasu stood shoulder-to-shoulder with the guard by one of the doors, muttering something in the man's ear, causing him to sweatdrop and hesitantly open the door with a shaky smile; allowing all four of them inside. "woah, that was awesome, aren!" kaidou yelled, not only out of awe but so he could be heard over all the cheering, laughing and game noises from inside the arcade. "yeah, that was so cool! but what did you say to that guy? he looked freaked out!" nendou inquired, surprising saiki with his actually intelligent observation. kuboyasu's hand found it's way behind his neck, rubbing it awkwardly as he chuckled, "oh, nothing! it's not important-- hey! how about you guys start playing your games and i'll go get the tickets we reserved, yeah?" "yeah!" kaidou and nendou cheered in unison, high-fiving the purple-haired boy before the all ran off in different directions, leaving saiki standing alone at the entrance. he fidgeted with his germanium ring, contemplating taking it off as he stared at kuboyasu; he really wanted to know what the teen boy could've said that'd incite such fear into a grown man, but he decided against it — merrily making his way towards the claw machines, leaving kuboyasu's secrets alone. ★★★★★★★★★★ "shit." he cursed under his breath as he watched the cyborg cider man plushie that he's been trying to win — for yuuta — for half an hour straight slip out of his grasp once again. 'these things are rigged. and what's the point in having psychic superpowers if i can't use them.' he thought to himself but had to quickly shake off the idea, as there was no way he could risk using his powers in such a crowded place, especially for a plush that wasn't even for himself but rather for an annoying kid. he sighed, slipping another coin into the slot and about to find the right state of mind until he heard a loud "fuck!"  from in front of him. his head jerked up, scanning the area for the source of the noise until his eyes landed on you. the claw machines were lined up, back-to-back, and playing on the machine diagonal from him was a girl with enchanting (e/c) eyes which contrasted greatly with her disheartened expression as she stared at the box. the only emotion she wore was sadness as she stared at the machine, so out of curiosity, saiki slipped off his ring in order to read her thoughts; feeling no guilt in listening to the affairs of a complete stranger. 'c'mon, stupid claw machine, i need this!' your silky yet whiny voice rung through his mind, 'what's she gonna think about me tomorrow when i tell her that i couldn't get her the gift she's wanted? she's gonna hate me- even more than she already does. and now i've spent all my money on this silly game so i can't even try get her a crappy gift with the little money i had. Wow, (y/n), you're the worst big sister in existence.' saiki cocked his head to the side, peering through the glass of the machines to see the contents of the claw machine you were standing in front of and when he saw the limited edition, silver cyborg cider man action figure sitting on a pedestal — almost as if it was taunting the poor girl — he finally connected the dots. your hand dug through your pockets until you found the smooth metal surface of your final coin, 'just once more try. if i win her this action figure, maybe she'll finally respect me as her big sister! and this toy will surely make her more happy than any gift mom could've possibly thought of. i'll make her sixth birthday one to remember!' the dejected look on your face slow lifted into a determined one, but it wasn't very convincing as saiki — and anyone else — could see the worry and shame in your eyes as you dropped your last coin into the slot of the machine, giving you one more chance to redeem yourself and claim the title of 'best big sister in the world'. saiki watched you maneuver the claw of the machine with bated breath, admiring how your pretty nose crinkled and your tongue poked out from the corners of your perfectly glossed lips in concentration — 'ew, stop being a simp, kusuo.' he mentally rebuked himself before engaging with your scene one again. your fist slammed down against the big red button, followed by the claw opening and lowering over the box of the cyborg cider man action figure, slowly closing it's jaws around the box and grasping it perfectly, resulting in a slight gasp to escape your throat as your lips pulled into a grin. the claw kept it's grip in the toy as it lifted up, slowly making it's way over the hole where it would drop the action figure, straight into your possession.  that is, if the grip didn't falter hence allowing the toy to fall down, off it's pedestal and onto the bottom of the compartment to join the rest of the more average action figures. "fuck!" you screamed in an almost identical way to which you did earlier, expect this one held more pain. 'this can't be happening; is this the third year in a row that i'm going to show up to my little sister's birthday party empty-handed?' you thought, your bottom lips quivering so you quickly bit down on it, staring at the damned toy before turning on your heels, shuffling away from the game with your head hung low, the thoughts which cried in your head about how much you budgeted and how hard you worked made saiki's heart sink. 'maybe i could take out a mortga--' your thoughts were abruptly cut off when you heard the noise of something falling behind you. whipping your head around to see what happened, you exhaled a sigh of relief upon seeing nothing out of the ordinary. however, you caught a glimpse of inside the machine which you had been cursing at and realised that the toy wasn't with the packaging peanuts where you left it, as if it magically disappeared in the few seconds you had averted your gaze. creeping up to it, your gaze darted around in search of anyone who might've won it in less than 5 seconds but that was unlikely. now that you were closer, you peered through the glass once more to confirm that the toy was in fact missing and you were right. recalling the noise of falling you heard just before you turned around, you dropped to your knees and lifted the flap to the compartment which held the good that people would win from the machine. you almost screamed with delight and shock when you laid eyes on the limited edition, cyborg cider man action figure that was tucked snugly inside. yanking it out, you pressed it to your chest and the tears you were choking back finally came running down your cheeks, but now they were from joy. "thank you, god." you whispered to yourself, making saiki chuckle from his spot at the claw machine which he hadn't moved from. he wasn't god — nor was he friends with god — but he didn't mind not being able to take the credit for his kind actions of using his psychokinesis to drop the box into the hole for you. honestly, he found that seeing you happy, sitting on the floor with brightest beam gracing your features along with your now cheerful thoughts in his head, was enough of a reward for him anyway. also, he appreciated how you didn't question how the box ended up in the hole and instead you just deemed it a miracle as you were too overjoyed to use logic; that sort of thinking saved saiki a lot of trouble. 'i should probably go home and wrap this.' your internal monologue had now calmed down slightly as you were now able to produce a thought that wasn't just a squeal of delight, 'hm, maybe once i am done i could come back and see the new movie that's premiering-- but i've not got much money left so i guess i shouldn't get ahead of myself.' you hummed, picking up the box along with yourself, dusting yourself off before heading towards the exit. saiki must've been staring for a tad too long though as you caught his gaze while brushing off your clothes. he cringed, instinctively darting his eyes away so you didn't think he was an ogling creep but the fact he appeared defensive probably didn't help. so he fully expected you to frown or cast him a dirty look, judging him for his actions but to his surprise, you simply chuckled. waving at the pink-haired boy before strolling off with the box under your arm. 'he seems cool. where i can get clips like those?' why were you thoughts making him blush like an idiot? time to put the germanium ring back on. ★★★★★★★★★★ as it turns out, nendou is surprisingly good at poker. he figured this out after he stumbled across the casino section of the arcade, and since he looks way older than seventeen, nobody questions it when he took a seat at one of the slot machines, under the impression that it was a fancy, old-timey arcade game. he was then offered a round of poker with some old dude with way too many gold teeth and nendou ended up taking the poor, stubborn guy's entire fortune. god-knows how many games with how-many people later, nendou was sitting on stacks of cash at a round table with a tired dealer, and two grown men — one crying into the shoulder of his arm-candy and the other weeping into the sleeve of his suit — while the three boys who had came to give him his ticket stood by, all wearing matching confused expressions. "uh, nendou." kuboyasu tapped his friend on the shoulder, waving the ticket in front of his face, "the movie is gonna start soon, we should start heading over there right now so we can buy snacks and get good seats." nendou raised an eyebrow, puzzled until he recalled that he was supposed to watch a movie today, "oh, that sounds cool and all but i'm having a lot of fun right here." he smiled, motioning to the large casino area. kuboyasu chuckled awkwardly, backing away from nendou slightly as he turned on his heels, ushering the two other boys away, "alright, well, have fun, nendou! don't stay out too late!" nendou sung an okay in response, sliding a kaidou some cash for the extortionate theatre snacks before he was rushed away by kuboyasu, the purple-haried boy not wanting to spend anymore time in the casino than needed. "if nendou isn't joining us for the movie then we have a spare ticket. here, saiki, you should have it!" "why me?" "uh, because you said you saw reita earlier. so if you see him again maybe you could offer him the spare ticket." 'absolutely not.' was vocalised as "sure." by saiki as he took the ticket from kuboyasu's outstretched hand, fiddling with it before stuffing it into his pocket along with his own ticket. "what i said to nendou was kinda an exaggeration" aren mused, glancing at his watch before looking up at his two pals, "we still have some time left before the movie starts. i'm gonna go handle some business — you two have fun, and try find reita!" kuboyasu said before pivoting on his heels in the direction of the staff only closet. the only thing saiki could think to do during this free-time was escape kaidou's pestering to play dance dance revolution — since saiki didn't want to dance, dance or revolute, he darted outside as soon as kuboyasu left, leaving kaidou alone and confused in the middle of the arcade. 'finally, fresh air.' saiki inhaled, filling his lungs with the cool air rather than the stuffy, arcade oxygen. scanning the surrounding area, his eyes caught a glimpse of a figure standing by the ATM, which he immediately recognised to be that of the girl he had helped earlier. so naturally, he flicked of his ring to figure out the reasoning behind the awkward look on her face. 'do i really want to withdraw money to see some stupid movie? i mean, i could leave that money to accumulate and buy something nicer later.' without thinking, saiki hummed in agreement with your thoughts as he had been in your position many times before. 'but then again, i should treat myself! when was the last time i saw a movie that wasn't pirated? hmm..' your indecisive thoughts matched perfectly with your conflicted expression as you stared through furrowed brows at the screen of the ATM. a soft breeze passed, followed by something light smacking against you face. you winced slightly, your hand snapping your cheek and grabbing at whatever it was; just by the texture, you could tell it was paper. holding it in front of you, upon further inspection you realised that the mysterious sheet that had flew into your possession was in fact a ticket to tonight's showing of 'Olfana's Story X-2'  row G, seat 9. you double, triple checked it out of fear that this may be a cruel prank but no, this was completely real! you cheered, bouncing up and down and away from the ATM since you no longer needed it's services as god had blew the desired item straight into your hands — or your face, rather. either way though, you were over the moon, clutching the ticket to your chest and basking in your second miracle of the day. unbeknownst to you, saiki's smile was almost as wide as your own. you thanked god for your relief and saiki had no problem with that; seeing your little happy dance and squeals with your free ticket was enough for him. but actually, perhaps he might benefit himself after all, since the ticket he had given you previous belonged to nendou. meaning that saiki was seated at row G, seat 10; right beside you. ★★★★★★★★★★ saiki forgot to send a few notes flying your way in the wind, so you walked into the theatre and took your seat, completely snackless since you couldn't afford the exorbitant prices that they sold food for at the cinema. but perhaps that wasn't all bad as it revealed the possibility for saiki to offer you some of his popcorn as a conversation-starter, as he's usually not too good at socialising with new people — forget starting a conversation. however, he didn't need to work up any sort of courage to talk to you as the first thing you did when you plopped down in your seat beside him was turn to him and chirp, "oh, you're the guy i saw at the claw machines earlier! i love your clip thingies." your buoyant-adrenaline allowing your to be more bold than usual. the movie had yet to start, low murmurs of chatter coming from across the theatre as the trailers played in the background, "yes. and thanks." 'good grief, curse myself for not being more talkative. she probably thinks i'm dull now. perhaps i should channel my inner nendou..if i have one.' instead of ending the conversation right there like he assumed you would, you continued talking and saiki was..glad? why did he want to interact with you so much? he spends most of his days trying to avoid interacting with people; why were you any different? "no problem- also, did you get what you were playing for?" you inquired, tapping your lip in genuine curiosity. his ring remained on his finger, despite the fact he wanted to know what you thought about him, he didn't want to invade your privacy any more than he already has. "no. did you?" "yeah, i did, actually!" you chirped, not noticing the smirk creeping onto saiki's lips as you were too engulfed in your memories, "i thought those games were rigged but maybe they're not 'cause i managed to win this super special action figure that my sister has been on the top of my sister's wishlist for like- forever! and her birthday is tomorrow so i'll be a--" you cut yourself off, crinkling your nose in embarrassment, "sorry, i'm over-sharing, aren't i?" your enthusiasm made his heart flutter in a way he wasn't used to, if you didn't know any better, he would have thought he was having a medical emergency. his eyes widened slightly as you halted in your speech, "no, you're fine." he said, the uncharacteristic softness in his voice catching the attention of his two pals sitting on the other side of him. you shook off his comment, "i mean, i'm telling you my life story and i don't even know your name." you said, laughing sheepishly at the reality of the reality of the situation. 

“saiki kusuo.” he blurted out without a second thought.

you blinked a few times, shocked that he’d give his details away so easily as you somewhat expected him to be more of a reserved type of guy but evidently, you were wrong. “uh, i’m (l/n) (y/n).” you choked, biting down on your bottom lip slightly before continuing you story as he seemed to wait expectantly, “as i was saying, today’s just been the best day ever! everything has been going so well, i’m a bit scared as to what is going to happen when it hits midnight.” 

saiki nodded along, popping a piece of popcorn into his mouth before remembering his plan, “oh- would you like some?” he asked, offering you some popcorn from his bucket. unfortunately, the plan was a last-minute thing so he had only bought a small, but he still wasn’t opposed to sharing. 

you shook your head, trying to grin foolishly wide at his kind offer, “no thank you.” 

saiki nodded, about to open his mouth to reply until the blaring music from the beginning of the movie started, putting a swift end to your conversation — despite the fact saiki would much rather talk to you than watch the crappy movie — out of theatre etiquette. 

★★★★★★★★★★

it was worse than you or saiki could’ve ever imagined.

it was painfully trying not to burst out laughing right in middle of it or lean over and giggle in each other’s ear at the silly dialog but out of respect for the other people in the cinema, you both stayed silent and just cast each other occasional knowing glances whenever something cringey happened on screen. 

you both let out audible sighs of relief with the credits began to roll, accompanied by a slow indie song. “that was..something.” you mumbled, grabbing your purse and jumping to your feet, wanting to exit the building as soon as possible and hopefully leave your memories of the movie behind you. 

“definitely.” he snickered, absently flicking the side of his empty popcorn bucket, “i stopped paying attention once i finished my popcorn.” it felt weird to vocalise — or rather, telepathically communicate — the comments he’d usually keep to himself; why did he feel so comfortable speaking to someone he only just met?

he began gathering his things, stuffing all of his rubbish in the bucket so he could dispose of it all at once. his mind was fixated on crappiness of the movie and how a five-year-old could’ve shot a much better film, until you grabbed his attention by calling out his name, followed by a question which made him blood run cold.

“before i go, it gotta ask’ how’d you do it? or more importantly, why’d you do it?”

he blinked several times before putting on his best bewildered expression, with the idea that maybe if he played dumb, he could gaslight you into thinking that it never happened or that he had nothing to do with it. “what?”

“oh, don’t give me that!” you scoffed, narrowing your eyes at the boy, “i’m not stupid. every time something good happened to me, you were nearby. i’ve connected the dots so fess up. why did you do all those nice things for me? was it out of pity or are you that nice to everyone?”

“i’m that nice to everyone.”

“i don’t believe you.” you snapped, fixing your tone when you remembered that even though he was lying to you, he still helped you get the present for you sister and gave you his spare ticket. “i don’t care if you’re not gonna give me a straight answer, but at least let me make it up to you.”

he huffed, an unimpressed look covering his features before you even proposed your idea. there was really nothing he could possibly need from you. what were you going to give him that he wasn’t capable of obtaining on his own? so he frowned, ready to decline your offer. 

“i saw that you bought one of those jelly pots from the snack stand and i actually work at a little café in the town, so i might be able to get you few things for free or discounted?”

“yes.” wait, that wasn’t refusal. 

“great!” you chirped, glad that you wouldn’t have to pry further, “does later this week sounds good? we could meet up here then i can walk you to the café- or i could give you my number and we can arrange a date later?” 

“sure.” saiki said without thinking once again.

but it wasn’t as though he regretted it when you slipped the piece of paper you had scribbled your number onto, into the front pocket of his shirt, tapping it with a smile. “alright! i’ll see you later then- unless you want to walk home with me?” you fidgeted with your fingers slightly, instantly regretting what you just came out with. not because you didn’t want to walk with him, but due to the fact you highly doubted he was going so say accept so you mentally prepared for the impact of his harsh rejection.

“sure.”

★★★★★★★★★★

BONUS 

saiki ended up walking home with some girl he met at the theatre so that left kuboyasu and kaidou to fetch nendou once the film finished. they both searched the casino area for almost half an hour but neither of them had any luck finding nendou. that was, until kuboyasu had to take a step outside to escape the casino as he noticed an old friend of his playing on the slot machines, and he found nendou crouched by the garbage cans, on his phone. 

“nendou! we’ve been looking all over for you- why are you out here by the trash? and what happened to all your money?!”

nendou chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck with his spare hand, “fun story actually. i was doing so well and i was on my way to becoming a millionaire until these schoolgirls came marching in and absolutely slaughtered me! it was so embarrassing and the only way i could escape them was by running away so i hid back here.”

kuboyasu’s aura just screamed ‘disappointed but not surprised’, “so you’re telling me that you lost millions to highschool girls?”

“they might’ve been middle-schoolers, i’m not too sure. i didn’t get a very good look at ‘em but they were all wearing creepy red uniforms.”

all kuboyasu could do was massage his temples to ease his headache at the stupidity of his friends, “so you lost all your money to school girls in creepy red uniforms?” he repeated aloud, just to make sure he was hearing things correctly.

“yes. but not all my money.” he said, pulling out his wallet and grandly opening it to reveal a few notes and a button, “i’ve still got enough to spend on ramen with my bros!”

[moldygreenblue]

things from the asoue movie

(i personally think did better than netflix asoue, with “honorary mentions” that i can tolerate in ways.)

1. the movie soundtrack. thomas newman composes a lot of good scores, and everything in the asoue movie soundtrack is no exception (drive away is a real head banger). the fact it’s all on youtube, means one can jam to it whenever they go on youtube (i’m guilty of this). i love the netflix soundtrack a lot as well because shoot that is jim dooley’s music (i love his music ever since pushing daisies came out!). but netflix...where’s the official soundtrack? the fact jim dooley’s youtube channel has him uploading songs via request means he’s the only one to listen to the fans who want the show’s soundtrack is why the movie did better because of netflix’s poor treatment by not releasing it. it has to be jim dooley himself having to do it (and i appreciate him doing so because omg i can finally hear the tpp version ‘that’s not how the story goes’ without lemony talking over *tears up*)

2. the vfd group photo. everyone in the photo feels all organic and real. you got members sitting on the floor and steps. some members are standing. some members smiling happy to be there, or with neutral expressions because they don’t want to be there. some are in gestures of sorts (ike is flexing his arm like a goofball; that’s a nice touch to flesh out a dead minor character). it almost feels like the movie team decided ‘since we have the budget, we should get billy connolly, meryl streep, and others to take a photo and we’re telling them they can do whatever they want’. netflix’s vfd feels artificial and very, fake in ways. i don’t want to say it’s a bad photoshop, because group photos can have everyone stand in neat little row all smiles, but some heads feel...off. like, something feels really off with larry, ike, and uh, the guy i think is lemony who is clearly got the worst of it. is that a bad photoshop?

3. the littlest elf. the movie made that elf have a (minor) presence from beginning to end. there’s the fake out opening. the theme song from the fake out opening is heard three more times (twice in-verse, and it’s the final song in the credits) and it’s annoyingly catchy. olaf having a bobble head doll so shoot that means it’s popular franchise in the movie world. the movie made the littlest elf a thing, and netflix only makes it a word-of-mouth reference. what’s weirder for netflix is gustav despite having more of a character and kept his director status (unlike movie!gustav), never bring up this horrific masterpiece and the connection between the two (that i can recall). like, this is not cool, netflix!

4. movie!monty being able to carry snakes and having a personal snake.  the movie probably had the budget to do so unlike netflix, but monty in any continuity would carry a snake with him if possible, even for a short amount of time. movie!monty goes up a level by being a giddy herpetologist with his own personal pet snake he loves and adore (sidenote: movie!monty, that’s why petunia thinks you’re a tree you always carry her around. you spoil her rotten). netflix!monty with the winged lizard is not the same vibe, because it’s cgi. i think netflix!monty should have hold a real snake for at least a minute, as a treat.

5. two-thirds of the wide window section. it’s not that i think the netflix version is bad, for i do enjoy it. but there’s so many details in the movie version i enjoy: josephine and her poofy black mourning dress. klaus dissociating in the kitchen and josephine losing it. josephine casually telling the children ‘oh no he [ike] got eaten by leeches’ and the baudelaires are all (O_o) and sunny speaks for them all. the fact josephine is strong enough to pull the chain to show off the wide window all by herself and violet and klaus are still (O_o).  josephine screaming at the jane lynch cameo + “we got to get her out of the house.”. sunny accidentally dropping the apple basket. klaus tackling captain sham shamelessly. the baudelaires getting accuse of shoplifting. everything about hurricane herman, especially with josephine’s fears coming true. klaus assuming violet may kill them all with her plan to get off the platform.

the fact that the deleted/extended version of josephine’s death is so messed up (josephine realizing she can’t jump, josephine allowing herself to sit back on the boat, crying as she apologizes, the fog covering her and the boat), i truly think the wide window was the book the movie team attempted to do the series right in their own way, but meddling got involve.

and now, honorary mentions.

honorary mention 1: movie!powder face women ages. i don’t know what is up with their personalities (i’m including deleted scenes), but you know what? the movie team did cast two actresses who fit the age range of the sbg. had the movie continued in hypothetical sequels, i would have 100% believe their recruitment into vfd is connected to the loss of their sibling in a fire. netflix!powder face women are older than their movie counterparts (and maybe book counterparts, taking brett helquist’s illustrations of them as them being on the younger side), so when netflix decided to make ishmael the creator of vfd, they pretty much made a giant hole of a contradiction over their statement of losing a sibling to a fire (unless they aged very badly). netflix due to their major changes of vfd, made the movie look good in a weird way. honorary mention because movie series is dead in the water, and their characterization.

honorary mention 2: the baudelaire’s mansion. the exterior only shows up for one second in its glory before fernald stabs his hook into the photo, but given how the ruins are shown a lot, it’s easy to tell the mansion isn’t super huge, but still huge and noticeable. its location being in middle of the street holding a corner spot of sorts means looking from high above does give the illusion it’s in the ‘heart of a dirty and busy city’. the netflix mansion...it’s something. the netflix mansion looks like it’s borderline on a suburb neighborhood, and the mansion takes up six lots like this not what i thought in mind. it’s honorary mention because the exterior shows up for one second (and i’m not sure how to feel about the interior).

honorary mention 3: movie!lemony hiding his face 24/7. netflix!lemony showing his face is because he’s narrating the series from the future. whenever (past) netflix!lemony shows up, there’s is a sense (future) netflix!lemony is trying to avoid narrating himself because it screams, “oh hey that’s me! oh wait that’s me. i’m just...going to go.” and he leaves and only comes back after he’s certain past!lemony is gone. as much i as actually enjoy what netflix did, i do like the ‘i’m not going to show my face, suckers’ angle lemony has in the books. 

the movie carries this over. lemony’s face is always not in the shot because the movie is showing his body head down, obscure by shadows, or do show his face but partly. the whole ‘my ribbon just jam’ bit still has lemony still refusing to not show his face. in fact, it’s hard to find a shot where his face is ‘visible’ without editing the lighting and shadows and what not until the ending, when lemony gets his transcript out of the typewriter due to the lighting of the lamp:

it’s a honorary mention because excluding lemony having no shame on interrupting the fake out opening, no shame on telling the audience to jump out the airplane if they’re watching the movie there, the ‘ribbon just jammed’ moment (if only because movie!lemony blank out afterwards), and technically lemony being melancholic after looking out the spyglass (lemony would totally do that, but in a different context), movie!lemony doesn’t do a lot of things that make him be, well, lemony. that, and movie!lemony’s aesthetics still confuses me to this day.