#it's the first time my rewatch series progress has been this thrown off

[mk-wizard]

Sailor Moon 90s Anime is STILL the best

Hi. I know I am on a Sailor Moon binge here, but after seeing all of Crystal, Eternal and on R (season 2) of the first anime, I want to get this all off of my chest... and before I go further, since these are all animes, I will refer to them as 90s, Crystal and Eternal. And after watching them all, I have to say that the 90s takes the gold medal as the best Sailor Moon anime so far and this is why;

1- It had the best pacing. - While I admit that sometimes, it went too far with the filler, 98% of the time, it worked with the 90s. It took its time to make you get to know the characters for better or for worse, it made you see different sides of them, it gave them a chance to truly develop and be multi-dimensional, and it made you care about them. When a death happened, it felt tragic. When a victory happened, you cheered. And when you saw what side characters did, it mattered. I mean, who can ever forget the contribution 90s Naru Osaka had to the story? And everyone who has seen the 90s anime cannot forget her. More on the character development and getting to know characters later.

Sure, it wasn’t true to the manga and even the characters had different personalities, but I let that slide by because when Crystal and Eternal did follow the manga to the letter, we didn’t get a chance to digest anything. The only characters who develop are Usagi, Chibi-Usa and the outer guardians, and for the last bunch, it was the bare minimum. Crystal and Eternal were fun rides and I would be lying if I said I didn’t like them, but they were like roller coasters. They gave you a thrill, but fast and been done. The 90s was like a slow scenic ride that gave you surprises, emotionally touched you, made you cry, made you laugh, made you root for the heroes and even at the age of 37 years now, I keep rewatching this series.

2- The art of the 90s was better because it was sketchy, dark and edgier. - I know Sailor Moon doesn’t seem like this on the surface because the heroines are lovely girls in cute costumes, it emphasizes femininity and all things pretty, it has a romantic theme and is all about love, but Sailor Moon is also one of the darkest, grittiest, edgy and violent magical girl animes I have ever seen since Magic Knights Rayearth. Sailor Moon has on screen deaths which were permanent most of the time, on screen stabbings and the drawing of blood, and fights that got so hardcore, that real punches and kicks were thrown. The dark edges, black line art and sharp edges worked with the atmosphere of the story. I mean, look at the difference between the halls Dark Kingdom of the 90s (above) and that of Crystal.

And if that is not enough to win you over, the characters were much more animated, organic and conveyed more emotion whether they were exaggerated or serious.

In Crystal, the expressions and body language was very dulled down. Not to mention, very stiff.

Everything is also too bright and soft which makes the characters look like velvet dolls with too much make up especially with the line art. I will give them props for adding better details, cleaner lines, the glow of magical items, and details in the gems, but everything else is all wrong.

Eternal was better, but still not quite there. The colours are still way too bright and the characters still look too much like dolls from having line art that is too wispy. And I really do not like how the eyes have this unnatural glow to them. The edgy scenes become lost with all this brightness.

3- We got to see that there was so much more the characters than just heroes or villains. - Since Usagi is the titular character, let us just talk about her in the 90s since I could go on forever about how much we learned about the characters. In any version of Sailor Moon, Usagi’s role as a Sailor Guardian has always been the core of the story and she does indeed show progress as one. However, the 90s tells us that no matter what, she is still going to be herself too which is just as important and she shows character development as just plain old Usagi too. The manga, Crystal and Eternal which only paint Usagi as not doing anything right except be a Sailor Guardian, but the 90s show her hidden talents and learning new skills. For example, she was bad at cooking at the beginning of the series.

However, by Sailor Moon R, she gets the hang of it and is able to cook a meal by herself. Yes, she is messy, clumsy, never gets the hang of making cookies and is nowhere near Makoto’s level especially when it comes to presentation, but she is good at cooking food.

Another hidden talent of Usagi’s is her drawing skills. She isn’t just good at drawing. She’s got talent at it, so in the 90s, Usagi is quite the artist.

And it is admirable that 90s Usagi is open to trying new things even if she isn’t good at them. She practices, she explores and tries to enlighten herself. Sure, academics, coordination and organization will never be her fortes, but she really does have other and tries to discover more.

In Crystal and Eternal, she is good at being Sailor Moon, she is a good friend and a good girlfriend, but that is it. She is one dimensional here and she isn’t the only one to painted like that. Everyone is only the obvious and that is all the audience gets.

4- Better character redemption. - I mentioned before that Sailor Moon had grit and was dark, but the 90s also made it more complex and did character redemption right. It was open to the possibility of bad people becoming good. For instance, the Black Moon Clan Specter Sister are unforgettable for being successfully redeemed.

Yes, I admit that the monster of the day would get killed by the hands of the Sailor Guardians, but they also clearly showed that the monsters were not people or even alive. They were made of energy, clay or sand. When the monster of the day was a possessed innocent, they were saved through exorcism. Very rarely was an actual person ever killed and even when they were, it was either by the hands of another villain, their own hand, self defense or as a last resort. They never used killing as means of dealing with every single bad guy.

Furthermore, the bridge arc about the Makai Tree that also served as a prologue to Sailor Moon R could be seen as a story about mercy, kindness and love. It stands out as the one time the big bad was actually a misunderstood big good being the Makai Tree herself. And even Ail an An were never bad, but were raised bad. And even then, they changed. This story is unique only to the 90s so far, but it was great and stood out for that reason.

In Crystal, the heroines will kill a person without a second thought which I am shocked that no one brings up how repetitive and contradictory that is. The pretty warrior of love and justice should by all means protect the Earth, but doing so by killing off the bad guy all time is not love or justice. I also think the caption in this picture sums up how I feel about how the one and only time bad guys were given a chance to be redeemed...

Eternal was better because the Asteroid Guardians got redeemed and saved. However, even then, I feel like there is still a double standard. They were one of the good guys to begin with and Sailor Guardians. In the 90s, the Amazoness Quartet wasn’t, but were given a chance to change anyway. I find it cool that the Quartet turned out to be Sailors and even better that they will go on to become Chibi-Usa’s team, but mercy is not just for your allies or for your own benefit. Everyone should be given at least one chance to fix their mistakes.

5- We got to know Mamoru better. - I admit that no matter the incarnation, Tuxedo Mask will never be as powerful as Sailor Moon except when he is King Endymion, but the 90s take on his character made him better even if they did omit his super attack being Tuxedo le Smoking Bomber. What the well dressed masked man lacked in firepower, he made up for in intelligence, insight about the enemy’s weakness, courage and skill. The only times he ever did get overpowered was either by bad luck or because it was intentional because he was taking a hit for Sailor Moon. And even then, he always got back up. He’s a real man like that.

More importantly, we get to know him as Mamoru too. Even before he confides being an amnesiac to Usagi, we see his struggles with feeling alone in the world from having no memory of his life before a tragic accident which also killed his parents. Now, him being a stern cynical person makes sense because I probably wouldn’t be pleasant to be around either if I lived with that. Once his walls come down, we see that deep down, all he wants is to belong somewhere and have a family. It should also be noted that 90s Mamoru doesn’t love Usagi because he is “destined” to. He loves her because he wants to. Even during that brief period where he broke up with Usagi was an act of love. The thing I also always liked best about 90s Mamoru is that even though he loves Usagi more than life itself, his life doesn’t revolve around her which is a healthy thing and he tries to encourage Usagi to be the same way for her own good. He is studying to be a doctor, he has a job and he even has his own crowd which I think is great.

In Crystal and Eternal, while I do see an attempt at trying to follow this trend by showing that Usagi and Mamoru were on their way to falling in love even before they got their memories back, I still find he was one note and we never really learn much about him that has nothing to do with Tuxedo Mask, Endymion or anything royal related. Sure, we know that he’s studying to be a doctor and is a genius to an extent too, but that is it.

I would like to end this by admitting that the 90s was not perfect either, but out of all the takes on the tale of Sailor Moon as of date. Crystal and Eternal were ok, but they just cannot stand up to the quality of the 90s. The only thing I can say I find Crystal did better than the 90s were the costume designs. Specifically, how they let Venus keep her chain belt, Pluto’s key chain belt, Uranus and Neptune’s shorter gloves, Uranus’s sword, Uranus having two earrings, Mercury’s suit is shoulder less which I always found suited her better, and I liked Sailor Moon’s brooch and necklace better in season 1.

And even then, I should have liked it if Jupiter’s antenna was always on display as it is just something I always found cute in the manga, I liked Mars’ five point star earrings better in the 90s, and I like how in the 90s, each of the Inner Guardians’ sailor stripes were a little different.

Of course, this is all my opinion. I would like to hear which of the animes did Sailor Moon right in your opinion and why. Thanks for reading and stay safe, and have a great day.

[missinghan]

countless skies upon me ⤖ lee minho

❖ genre : fantasy; action; fluff; angst 

❖ word count : 16,5k.

❖ warnings : explicit language, mentions of blood + violence

❖ summary : when you stumble upon the notoriously skilled swordsman of Kalmburg, your heart finds itself wanting to get closer to his.

❖ a/n : this is the full extension of this blurb that I wrote impulsively after rewatching an old anime, please give swordsman minho a whole lot of love 🖤

prologue.

Minho’s wooden sword gets knocked out of his grasp, landing onto the floor with a loud series of clattering noises. The little boy widens his eyes when the tip of another wooden sword hovers over his stomach and he looks up to be met with the stoic gaze of his mentor. 

“What did I tell you yesterday, Minho?” 

“That I need to make more progress on improving my reaction time,” he answers grimly and rubs his forearm, head hanging low in shame. “I need to know the timing of the enemy like the back of my hand and use my own timing in which they don’t expect.”

His mentor retreats his sword swiftly, humming, “You got distracted, you weren’t observing my stance before I lunged at you. By narrating the enemy’s preparation, you can partially map out their movements, when and where they’re aiming for. That’s why you were taken aback and this allowed me to disarm you with little effort.”

“But master!” Minho pries stubbornly. “It’s not very fair if an opponent can’t fight with their sword, is it? A sword is supposed to be the coil of a swordsman’s strength. It’s all we’ll ever have.”

A fatherly smile dances on his mentor’s lips this time. “Strength is simply an illusion, there are far more important things,” he places a warm hand on Minho’s shoulder, speaking softly. 

“And it doesn’t matter if you still have your sword or not, fighting isn’t an obligation, it’s a choice. A choice whether you’re going to fight until the very end or not.”

one.

Market stalls crowd the route, selling sacks of nuts and dried fruit, grilled meat hanging on lines after lines of roasting skewers. Powdered spices lay in rust red and dusty yellow and bright green piles spill from sacks as large as feed bags. Mixed and familiar scents cut through thin air, people bumping into each other, toes trodden on. Lovers stroll hand in hand, casually browsing whilst housewives hustle and bustle, hollering over background noises for the best price.

Minho ends up walking through the entire market before getting to work that day with an apple in his stomach, silently like a phantom, blending into the sea of people effortlessly. 

To him, work is just like another day in the market for stallholders, another pile of weapons needed to be honed and repaired for blacksmiths and another batch of bread to bake early in the morning for bakers. 

Except his job is somewhat… questionable and considerably dangerous for a guy who looks nothing like a warrior. At least that’s what he’s been told. Rather pretty-looking eyes being hidden under his long fringe, a high and slim nose bridge, sharp philtrum. He’s not that tall either and doesn’t necessarily have as many muscles as he initially wanted. But the swordsman doesn’t listen to his muscles to fight, he listens to his mind and becomes one with his blade. 

There’s no need for a shield or armor, for he thinks they’re doing nothing but getting in his way and slowing him down during combats. Minho draws his sword with no more qualms than a middle-aged lady gossiping about her irritating neighbors and slashes his enemies while thinking about what he’ll be making himself for dinner that day. There’s no joy for him in violence, but he takes extreme pride in a good clean kill. He has a reputation to maintain and that reputation keeps him safe in this world. 

A man approaches Minho from behind, leaning himself flat against the wooden bench that the swordsman has situated himself on for the past hour. The guy never makes the first move, that’s what he’s been told. 

“Twenty thousand units,” the masked client speaks up, his voice mellow and slightly muffled. “If you can bring back the head of a shadow wolf that’s been lurking around the Dunst forest these days, I’ll double the price. Silver-white fur, brown eyes. Make it quick too, and you can have sixty in total. He’s been eating up one too many of our sheeps already.”

His lips twitch subtly and he crosses his legs, keeping his tone low but clear, “Shadow wolves can’t handle the cold that well, why would one roam around a place with such tremendous decrease in temperature at night?” The sound of coins crashing against each other in the leather pouch suddenly irritates him. 

“C’mon, Black Swordsman, how would I know these things? I’m just merely a guy who’s trying to get by in life,” the man chuckles lightheartedly but Minho isn’t finding anything funny. No one ever gets the upper hands in a deal with him. “Look, I heard you’re good at your job and you sure look like you know what you’re doing so why don’t you just take the mon—“

 Minho stuffs his hands into his pocket and sighs, “Don’t think so lowly of me, I don’t accept deposits. I’ll only get my money once I’m done with the job. Meet me here tomorrow at noon, sharp. And if I don’t show up, consider locking your sheeps inside.” And with a grin through his flat lips under the mask, the cryptic client leaves Minho alone by the bench, fully satisfied with his attitude and reactions. 

The brunet gazes at the space ahead for a good ten seconds, thinking rather deeply about this before waving his hand absentmindedly, calling out to the errand boy who’s been hiding behind the ugly tree. “You can come out now, Jeongin. Did you catch any of that?” he asks without turning around. 

“Every single word,” Jeongin cancels the spell that’s been his cover during their entire conversation before stepping out, pursing his lips together. “A guy who’s trying to get by in life but still has twenty thousand to pay you beforehand? Sounds absurd to me.”

“Enough with the brainless chatters, you know what to do,” Minho pushes himself off the bench when his muscles start growing sore on the hardened surface. “If you do a good job, I’ll treat you out for dinner. Now run along, Chaeryeong is probably looking for you, don’t be late to class.”

Jeongin holds him back by the sheath of his sword, “You’re still going to accept the job? I don’t think it’s worth the risk. He’s obviously setting you up.” 

“If anything, I might bring his head back instead of the wolf’s,” Minho replies monotonously, and Jeongin lets his hand fall to his side. The swordsman turns on his heels to see concern laced in the younger boy’s eyes, this prompts his voice to soften. “Don’t worry, a single wolf can’t hurt me,” he ruffles his hair before slipping into the crowd again, making his way towards the mountains to enter the Dunst forest. 

He wouldn’t mind dying alone, actually. It’s not like he has any regrets.

two.

The city of Kalmburg has it that no one has ever surpassed Lee Minho when it comes to the art of swordsmanship. 

“If you’re going to take on a guy who can parry a crossbow bolt with his sword as he’s contending against five other men, it’s time to re-evaluate the direction of your life—preferably while running away as fast as you can.”

The man walks up to the center of the town square every single day at the crack of dawn, his figure fully covered in a big black cloak, the hood thrown lazily over his head. All you can see is the strides he takes with his black combat boots. He almost belongs, but not quite. Kalmburg is known for its dashingly ornamental architecture — a white granite surface with serene spires can be seen from the castle at the top of the hill, soothing atmosphere and generically nice residents. Some say no beauty can be compared to its sunrise due to the dashing sight of a lake situated before the town square’s gate. 

Whereas, Lee Minho gives people a stark contrast with his dark aura and the black sword hung firmly on his back. He easily takes in everyone’s attention with a single sweep, his midnight orbs setting on nothing before he leaves as expressionless as he’s entered. His purposes and motives always remain hidden; hence the allure. Though it’s not hard to see how he’s making a good living on a daily basis. 

For one, he slays monsters; and for another, he deals with people. Outsiders might be surprised at how many units the Nobles are more than willing to pay him as long as he comes back alive, with the beast’s head limp in his hands. There were times when he’d come back covered in a sea monster’s gastric juice, other times he could barely walk back to the town because his spleens got severely damaged. But most of the time, he’d return as though he just got back from a stroll, outstretching his palm to collect the payment. 

Dealing with people is far more troublesome than those deadly creatures, Minho constantly tells himself so. It’s true, after all. Because when careless juveniles aren’t able to snatch their parents’ spare change on the dining table, they decide it’s a brilliant idea to challenge him for a duel. If they win, he’ll have to follow their request without receiving a single penny. But if things go the other way around, they will most likely come home crying for their mother. Such a nuisance. 

Today is no different. 

Moving into the morning dew is a shadow wolf. His paws kiss the earth not gracefully, but rather with evident difficulties and there’s a ray of exhaustion in that pair of bronzed eyes. The wolf has seen better days. His silver-white fur is thin and it clings to his frame like an old cloak in a gale. Even from several yards away, Minho can count each rib as they’re sticking out, he sees dejection in his movements as if he’s gonna let himself tumble to the ground any moment. 

Minho carefully inhales, pulling out a silver dart from the back of his belt. He raises his hand and aims precisely for the pine tree, just a strand of hair away from the wolf’s ear. When he exhales, the weapon comes flying past the creature before embedding itself to the wooden surface. 

The wolf whips his head towards the swordsman, locking eyes as he lets out a mere cry of pain, crimson dripping down on the side of his head. As Minho pulls his hood off of his face, slightly dubious that the creature of darkness will turn into a wisp of black smoke to take flight deeper into the forest, the wolf shakes his head before lying down on the soil, unable to coordinate his limbs. Then with his great grey head on his bloodied paws, he closes his eyes. He’s giving up on his life. 

“Something’s wrong. Shadow wolves’ blood isn’t supposed to be red,” Minho holds his breath in utter disbelief, taking a step backward. He’s got the wrong target. No, that client scammed him. 

A branch snaps. 

Minho reaches for his sword when the sound of thin air being ripped apart rings inside his eardrums, two blades coming in contact with each other and he has to squint slightly when tiny sparks of flame come to life between the weapons. Instead of looking at the raider, he quickly deflects their slash again. Hypothetically speaking, there are two possibilities: the first is that both swords are too weak to withstand the pressure of the blow, so they’ll simply break - in the exact same fashion. The second is in which case both blades are durable enough to field the contact, they will bounce right back. But his unwanted guest seems to detest him so much to the point they keep their sword grinding against his until their weapons slip against each other, creating a wave of grating shriek resonating through the woods, dust being thrown in the air. 

He stumbles backward, the sole of his shoes tearing the leaves below into bits. His vision shakes a little from the sudden attack before trying to focus on the figure before him. The first thing that he sees is the white wolf on the button of your silver-accent cloak. That’s the royal guards’ emblem.

“You,” the female voice catches him by surprise. “Lay another finger on that wolf now, I dare you.” You know all too well who this man is, and like hell you’re going to let him do what he wants just because of some cheap units.

Minho’s fully aware that his beating heart is thundering inside his chest, but he’s not sure if it’s because of the adrenaline flowing in his veins or those round eyes glaring at him from under the sunlight. He sees the grip on the hilt of your rapier being tightened and that’s when he regains his composure, taking in a deep breath. If he gave up now because of a pretty face with a deadly blade, he’d damn his reputation as a swordsman.

“Oh that wolf is all yours,” he smiles at you fakely, wiping the beads of sweat on his cheekbones away. “But you’re going to have to do better than snooping around on people.”

Minho steadies his grip on his sword, trying to keep himself together in the deafening silence, “So, who’s making the first move now?” The tonal mockery in his voice irks you and he seems to notice that too by the slight smirk tugging at his lips when the muscles on your face twitch. 

One. Breathe in.

You’re getting into your stance sideways, your blade eye level. This man doesn’t know what he’s getting himself into. 

Two. Breathe out. 

Minho isn’t letting his guard down this time despite being slightly impressed with your skills. Usually, there aren’t many girls who take up sword fighting, at least not in his hometown so he thought you’d be sort of a novice. But your dexterity is beyond incredible, he can hardly see the tip of your sword. 

Three. “I am.”

You charge first by swinging your rapier at him from above, Minho receiving the clash with the flat of his blade. He circles away from you, keeping his sword in motion while constantly changing his stances and attacks. Rapiers aren’t very suitable for slashing or slicing since the blade is so long and thin, it can only allow its owner more speed, more precise stabs and thrusts but greatly lowers their defense. So if he can just catch you off guard…

When the tip of your sword grazes just above his clothed ribs, Minho’s reflexes kick in and his blade knocks yours away almost immediately. With the bewildered look on your face as a signal, he dodges as you attempt another stab at his left ear. This causes you to trip on your heels, your balance quivering the moment his sword slashes at the button of your cloak rather than your neck. To prevent yourself from falling, you jump and do a backflip safely, breath’s fraying as the piece of clothing is completely ditched by a tree. 

“You are strong, just like the rumors,” you breathe out a stoic comment, chest heaving up and down rapidly. 

“You aren’t too bad yourself either,” Minho grins; he hasn’t felt this much eagerness to fight someone other than monsters before. In other words, he’s never faced someone who knows what they’re doing with a sword as skilled as you are. 

You cock a brow at him, confused, “Why are you smiling?” 

“I don’t know, actually,” he shakes his head and hearty waves of laughter bubble up inside his stomach. The brunet sheaths his sword with a loud ‘clunk’, walking towards you to place a warm hand on your shoulder. “But good fight, you really know how to hold a sword.”

“Wait… aren’t we going to finish this?”

Minho picks up your cloak from the ground, outstretching his palm, “You seem like a person who knows what it takes so I don’t think that’d be necessary anymore. But I’d be glad to take you on again?”

This man is baffling you, and not in a good way either. Nonetheless, you still slide your sword back into its sheath and accept his handshake. “So you’re gonna leave that wolf alone right?”

“Only if you tell me what happened to it,” Minho replies firmly, receiving a nod of approval from you. He actually seems like a solid person. Perhaps you can trust him. 

“That’s my brother, Chan.”

three.

The forest hums with life all around you. You lift your head ever so slightly when the sunlight slips through the green leaves and branches, lighting up the dirt path ahead decorated with outgrown roots and wildflowers. You gaze up at the fluffs of clouds, searching for the birds that are singing sweetly. Minho trudges on before you a couple of steps, finding the natural fragrance of the current surroundings rather soothing. It’s making his eyes droopy.

“What happened to him again?”

He stretches his limbs tiredly and yawns like there’s no tomorrow, making you scrunch your nose in disapproval. He’s not even paying attention to you. It’s been at least an hour since you’ve mounted an unconscious Chan on your horse — Noir and accepted this cryptic stranger as your guide for now. You’ve never been to this forest more than once so it’s best if you follow him—an experienced individual in order to get your brother back safely. 

You frown at him, giving the back of his neck a firm slap while your other hand is holding onto the rein. “Ow, what was that for?!” he yelps. 

“You weren’t listening, were you?” 

“Remotely,” he hums out a reply, “I didn’t sleep that well last night.” And that’s when you notice the dark spots under his eyes, the occasional tears whenever he squints his eyes under the sunlight. The job’s more draining and demanding than you thought. 

To be fair, slaying monsters and getting your hands bloodied might not be the best thing to do to a degree of morality but you really can’t judge him when you’ve only known him for a few hours. Minho’s far younger than you’d expected too. You’ve had your strolls downtown from time to time with your fellow royal guards and it’s not hard for rumors to fly. People were gasping and bouncing on the balls of their feet talking about this mysterious swordsman who’s dressed completely in black, a single one-handed sword, no shield, and no armor. They really had you thinking he was an old man in his forties who has no regrets, just trying to get by in life no matter what it takes. 

And you’d be lying if you said you didn’t find him charming the moment you saw that handsome face under the big cloak. 

“He was recovering from a business trip so our mage decided to treat him with a special potion,” you nibble on your bottom lip, looking over at your worn out brother sideway in concern. You’ve wrapped his injuries up with some of the cloth that you’d packed before leaving this morning, he should be fine. “I guess something went wrong; hence, he’s magically turned into a wolf, panicked and bolted out of the castle. And you know how cruel people can be sometimes…”

“Oh, sorry about that,” Minho feels a big lump in his throat when you secretly toss a glare at his direction. “I should have known something was off the moment he started bleeding red.” He shakes his head, highly disappointed in himself for mistaking Chan as a shadow wolf. His professional etiquette forbids him ever repeat the same mistake. 

You stop dead in your track, cocking your head at him in confusion, “What do you mean?” 

Wait, no, something’s wrong. Something’s terribly wrong. It can’t be that simple. “You’re still going to accept the job? I don’t think it’s worth the risk. He’s obviously setting you up.” His steps come to a halt, only a few feet away from you and before you can even tap him out of it, Minho snaps his head back, grabbing you by the shoulders. “Tell me, when you first entered the forest, did you encounter any wolves? Even just one?”

“N-No, I don’t think so,” you stutter, slightly flustered at the sudden decrease in proximity. But you soon shake the heat on your cheekbones away when he lets go of you, pacing back and forth to think hard about something. “Uhh- what are you-”

“Shh shh..”

“Did you just shush me-” The wind whistles in your ears and you stumble backward when Minho draws his sword, the blade coming in contact with something hard and deflecting it successfully. Your jaw is locked at the sight of an arrow sticking to a tree not very far off. That could have been your head instead...He just saved your life.

“Someone’s coming, take cover.”

Minho carefully tugs your horse over to a nearby slope when you hop off the main pathway, waving him over to a big tree. You both get down on one knee as the sound of armors crashing against each other grows louder, dreadful footsteps becoming more detectable. Swiftly, Minho notices the color of your bright blue cloak can easily be detected right through the bush and clicks his tongue in annoyance. He unbuttons his black coat, silently draping it over your smaller figure. For a second there, you widen your eyes at him but soon ensconcing yourself obediently under the leather fabric. 

Stepping into your vision are two familiar faces, Minho’s breath almost hitches in his throat when he realizes they’re clothed in the same blue and white uniform as yours. Both equally emitting the same hostility and mettle—as expected from the astute royal guards. 

“Hyun-”

You stagger backward when Minho clasps a firm hand over your mouth, shaking his head while you’re giving him a ‘what are you doing?’ look. The moment you manage to peel yourself away from his grip, your fellow colleagues are nowhere to be seen. They must be looking for you since you left the castle this morning without a proper announcement. “What was that about?! They’re my friends, now if you’d excuse me-”

“They aren’t the most trust-worthy people right now,” he lets out a sigh. “Think about it. They’re parts of the few people who could possibly see Chan the day before he turned into a wolf. And I’m sure the royal mage wouldn’t have such a reason to spike the commander of the guards. I don’t see how it’d benefit her if Chan was to take a break from his position. On the other hand…”

Is he accusing one of your friends of harming your brother? And for what too? A higher rank in the team? Preposterous! “Why would I trust you then, Black Swordsman?” 

Minho cringes inwardly at the nickname because good gracious, it’s so unoriginal. He’s heard about plenty of Black Swordsmen before during his wandering all over the Continent. They’re basically cryptic-looking swordsmen dressed in black...people really need to come up with more colorful monikers.

“Because I just saved your life from those people whom you called ‘friends’,” he blinks at you bluntly and the hand resting on the hilt of your sword tenses up. 

You take in a deep breath, slowly considering his deductions. It’s not like he doesn’t have a point but you don’t understand as to why Hyunjin or Changbin would want to overtake your brother, they’ve only become a part of the royal guards four years ago. You might not grow up together but after going on plenty of adventures and living in the palace, you’re practically family.

Still, humans are made of greed after all.

“I can’t believe I’m doing this,” you exhale. “You’re going to help me figure this out for throwing a dart at Chan’s ear. But if you even think about hurting him or make a single move that prompts me to think you’re doing something behind our back, I’m going to tear out your spine with my bare hands.”

Minho chuckles at your threatening tone, slightly scared for his life, “There’s no need to worry, miss…” You raise a brow at him when he trails off rather flusteredly. “Ma’am? No- uh, vice commander? What about lady…”

“The name’s Y/N,” you can’t help but break into a fit of giggles, amused at his sudden discomposure. Seems like this man has been chit-chatting with monsters more than having civil conversations with other human beings for his whole life. “And would you get your hands off me now? We don’t have to hide anymore.”

His chest swells a bit at that if he’s being honest.

four.

“Aren’t we supposed to be at the castle?” Minho looks at the log house before his eyes questioningly. Not that he’s complaining, he doesn’t think it’s the best idea for him to show up in front of royalties either. 

You pull off your hood and say, “No, the royal mage doesn’t live there.” After a few knocks with your knuckles on the wooden door, hurried footsteps are audible from inside the house—whoever’s in there must be dying to see you, Minho thinks. 

“Yeji, how are y—“ The door flies open and a figure thrashes against you faster than a lightning bolt, their arms wrapped around your torso, rubbing your back tenderly. You’re slightly taken aback but smile nonetheless knowing that your friend was worried sick like she’s always been. “Hello to you too, stupid.”

This prompts Minho to avert his gaze away awkwardly, the grip on Noir’s reign tightening evidently and your horse lets out a small neigh, nudging her nose against his side like she’s attempting to appease him. He murmurs a small ‘thank you’, hand reaching upward to brush through her shiny black coat. Shaking his head, he snickers at himself for talking to a horse. 

Yeji mumbles against your neck in relief, like someone’s just lifted a weight off her shoulders, “Good gracious, Y/N! Are you okay? You just left without saying anything. Changbin and Hyunjin said they couldn’t find you in the woods and Chan’s gone missing for a few days now and I got so worried I-”

“Slow down, Yeji,” you give her a firm squeeze in reassurance, chuckling. “It’s barely been a day. I did manage to find Chan, surprisingly, thanks to Minho, well, partly.”

“Who’s Minho?” she pulls away to get a good look at the man standing next to your horse, eyes widening in surprise. Dressed in black, one-handed sword, no shield, and armor. “Is that the Black Swordsman? Like the Lee Minho? He’s the real thing?”

You grit through a stiff smile, “As real as it can get.”

“Huh, and I thought he’d be some old, balding man in his forties,” Yeji comments while eyeing the swordsman up and down, making him somewhat uncomfortable. “He knows how to use a sword, is young and quite the looker too. Ohh I see what’s going on here..”

You warn her with a clap on her forearm, “You’re embarrassing me in front of that jerk.”

However, she ignores you and pushes the door open, motioning for Minho to carry Chan inside. “Move quickly now, Black Swordsman, I suppose Chan’s condition must be critical, his heartbeat and the blood flow in his veins is increasing at an alarming speed.”

Minho looks around in awe when he steps into the log house—there’s not much for him to say about the house. Furniture is self-explanatory enough: a single bed, a comfortable chair made with what seems to be one of the finest materials, a wooden shelf above the fireplace with an array of potions with different shades and colors, windows completely covered with curtains. It’s not much, but it does feel homey. He would be able to find a place like this with ease if he hadn’t wasted all of his money into information dealing and weapons trading.

“It’s nice, isn’t it? The house, I mean.” 

Yeji’s question snaps him out of it. And he looks over at the table where Chan’s lying, immobile and his bronzed eyes droopy and his breaths mingling. There’s a strange, bright light pulsing from the mage’s fingertips when she hovers her palm over Chan’s bloodied ear. Minho watches as the light flickers from a shade of white to blue, enveloping the open wound and heals it completely. He meets Yeji’s eyes before she pulls her hand back, her eyes glowing gold before turning back into a deep brown. The art of magic is truly fascinating. 

Minho manages to blurt, slightly flustered, “What?”

“You said the house’s nice, I simply agreed with that statement for it is true,” she briskly reaches for a flask, inside holds a soft green-colored liquid with golden specks floating around. 

“I didn’t say anything,” he frowns at her when she brings the rim of the flask to Chan’s mouth, pouring the odd-looking liquid down his throat. 

You speak up from behind her, arms crossed in front of your chest, “Yeji, stop reading people’s mind that’s creepy.”

“Okay I’ve got everything I need for the potion that’ll manage to turn Chan back into his human form,” Yeji tells you while rummaging through her wooden cabinets filled with bottles after bottles, grabbing some along the way as she comes back to the table. “But I’m missing some crystals. And I’m not talking about those fake ones that you see at the stores, the ones I need are way towards the north, in Drachens Hohle, on the Restless Cliffs.”

Minho hums, brows knitted together, thinking rather thoroughly about this. “Drachens Hohle is pretty far off, it might take us an entire day to get there, and then another day climbing those cliffs...we might need to pass by a store of a friend of mine to pack some stuff since I suppose you won’t be returning to the castle anytime soon. We’ll get moving as soon as possible,” he mumbles and nods to himself, satisfied with the plan. 

“Let me just make one thing clear here, Black Swordsman…”

He screws his eyes shut when air suddenly gets ripped apart, only opening them slowly after and almost flinches at the tip of a dagger pointed directly at his nose; one wrong move and his eye will be gone. Minho doesn’t know what should startle him more—the blade gleaming with a bright shade of yellow or the dark look in Yeji’s eyes when he meets them. He’s seen Chaeryeong do it many times before—incorporating magic with weapons, to better the damage output while maintaining the defensive factors. 

“If you lay just one single finger on my friend, I'm going to turn you into a mere, pathetic, little sparrow and lock you in a cage along with other pieces in my collection.”

Minho panics, feeling nauseous at the thought, “What collection?”

The mage withdraws her knife and laughs it off, “I was messing around with you, there’s no collection. Look after her for me, she can be quite clumsy sometimes.”

“The clumsy one here is you,” you mumble bitterly in the corner, extremely embarrassed for the sake of your friend. You might as well dig a hole and bury yourself in it.

Unexpectedly, the wooden door is once again pushed open, two men barging into the log house abruptly. You and Yeji remain still in your current positions while Minho touches the hilt of his sword, ready to draw it. “Don’t bother, they’re friends,” you wave at him absentmindedly before pushing yourself off the chair, walking over to the front door. 

“Y/N, where have you been?!” 

“Hello to you too, Bin.”

Changbin pushes past Hyunjin and jabs his index finger at you, eyes filled with both rage and concern. “What were you thinking? If you’re going to find Chan, we’re going with you. We’re a team and he’s our brother too! Don’t you remember? That was an irresponsible and childish action to do, you’d better have a good explanation for this. If you’re going to do something, at least act your role in the team more properly.”

Hyunjin pulls him back by the arm, shaking his head, “Changbin, stop. There’s no point in arguing. What’s most important is she’s gotten back safely.”

You eye both of your teammates back and forth, skepticism and uncertainty rising from the pit of your stomach. If what Minho said was true, then the culprit must be one of them. Or was he lying to you, trying to mess with your mind in order to achieve a personal goal of some sort? After all, you’ve only met him today yet you’ve known Changbin and Hyunjin for years now, why would you even hesitate to choose your friends over a total stranger? 

“I wasn’t alone.” Changbin pauses at your words. “He was with me, this is-”

“Lee Minho.” You gape at your friend in disbelief. 

Minho’s hand pulls away from his sword, a strange glint flashes in his eyes for a moment there. “It’s good to see you’re doing well, Changbin,” he says with difficulties, clearly not knowing how to act. 

“Why were you with her?” Hostility washes over the atmosphere when Changbin croaks out, fists clenching in anger. “Y/N, what were you doing with a scumbag like him? Haven’t you heard enough rumors about this guy? People like him only care about themselves, they’ll just end up hurting you in the end. There’s no good in letting him stick around.”

When you squint your eyes at him, Changbin takes long strides towards you, grabbing your wrist and attempting to pull you away. “Yeji, please take care of Chan for the time meaning and we’ll be heading back to the castle. Y/N can’t just leave when we need her the most.“

Minho tugs you back towards him and voices firmly, “I’m sorry, but your vice commander belongs to me now. I’ll be responsible completely for her security and escort her with all my respects. You’ll simply have to make do without her for some days.”

Changbin lunges for Minho’s collar, anguish seething inside his chest. “Insolent bastard! On what basis do you think you have the right to protect her? You might not be a threat, but you’d better stop pretending to be a hero.”

“A hero? Like you?” He shouldn’t have said that. 

Hyunjin looks rather concerned, rubbing his friend’s shoulders, “Changbin, we should go.”

“Seo Changbin, Hwang Hyunjin,” you step in between them in disquiet, shoving Changbin away. “As vice commander of the royal guards, I will be coming with Lee Minho in the next few days on an important trip and I stand by my own decision. If my absence causes the team any trouble, I’ll be more than happy to receive the punishment from our superiors. You two are to return to the castle until further notice, continuing on with your service for the king and queen.”

“As we should,” Hyunjin smiles at you sweetly before walking over to Chan, giving the wolf a small pat on the head. In return, Chan lets out a displeased growl but it’s too small to notice. Minho watches the guard from afar, suspecting the strange glint in his eyes. He decides to say nothing about it.

“I’ve already warned you about him, don’t come crying for me when things go wrong.” With that, both of the royal guards excuse themselves out of the log house—Changbin shutting the door angrily after Hyunjin bidding you goodbye with a hug. This makes your heart heavy for not being able to trust them. You still don’t understand as to why, but you have a sudden faith in Minho, your intuitions are telling you that you should trust him. 

Softly, you ask, “You know Changbin?”

“He’s an old friend, we haven’t talked in a while,” Minho shifts uncomfortably in his chair, finding the topic rather awkward to talk about. “We didn’t get along that well back then either. Glad to see nothing has changed.”

You shouldn’t have asked him in the first place. 

five.

A wide variety of shops lined the streets of downtown Kalmburg: antique and art stalls, jewelry, and accessory shops, luxury boutiques, souvenir kiosks and stores selling leather goods, all showcasing an array of the finest wares in the area. Tourists flock to them like fireflies to a lamp, enthusiasm accentuating their features. The silvery melody of the drawl of sightseers and the strong, distinct accents of the locals drift through your ears as they amble by. 

You follow Minho to the very end of the streets with your cloak draped over Chan’s limp body. No one needs to know why there’s an unconscious wolf on the back of your horse. Alas, you both arrive in front of an old wooden door, the mahogany color fading as a result of time. He told you that he needed to pass by a friend’s place but doesn’t this place look a bit fishy-

“Five hundred units for ten bags of Philenor powder, and you’re good to go!”

A blond-haired boy peeks out from a client behind the counter. “Well if it isn’t my least favorite customer,” he voices cheerfully. 

“That’s because I’m smart enough to not buy any of your shit, Jisung,” Minho walks in with a grin, pitifully eyeing the dreadful-looking man who’s taking heavy strides out of the shop. He’ll learn someday. “Still running your greedy business as usual I see.”

The dealer named Jisung returns the sarcastic remark with a gummy smile, bumping his fist against Minho’s in a brotherly way. “Don’t speak so ill of me, will you? This greedy business is housing you,” he retorts, “I suppose you’re going to hog my place tonight as you always do, Black Swordsman?” So turns out he spends his night slumbers in this old crusty shop, no wonder people think he sleeps in the woods since they’ve never run into him outside of the town square before.  

“Actually, I won’t be in town for tonight,” Minho’s answer catches Jisung off guard. “I’m heading north, to the Restless Cliffs.”

“Another life-risking business trip huh. You’re going to need warm clothes, some supplement, and probably some medicine too,” Jisung hums to himself. “Hey, Felix! Get your butt over here and sharpen a sword!”

You detach your rapier from your belt and take a few steps forward before placing it onto the counter. “Uhh, can you perhaps do the same thing for my sword? I’m coming with him,” you try to appear as friendly, not wanting to startle him. 

But to your dismay, “Y-You’re one of the th-the royal guards!”

The younger boy looks over at you, utterly bewildered when he sees the emblem on your uniform. His eyes look like they’re about to pop out of their socket any second now. As if to fuel the fire, Minho jerks his head towards the direction of Noir, speaking casually, “Also, ask Chaeryeong to take care of the wolf and the horse for me. Tell her to be gentle too, the wolf is hurt and confused. Don’t let him drink potions that aren’t tested beforehand.”

“You brought injured animals to my shop?!”

“One more thing, I need to see Jeong-”

Jisung has to manually shut him up by swinging an arm over his neck, forcing his friend to tumble over the wooden counter, their cheeks pressed against each other. He’s practically spitting into Minho’s face at this point. “What in the world is an outcast, stubborn-headed of a loner like you doing out here with a royal guard?! Didn’t you say that having other people coming along would only get in the way? I thought you worked alone! What’s the deal man?”

“Ahaha, it’s a long story. You see-”

“Excuse my discourtesy for I haven’t introduced myself properly yet,” Jisung stops and averts his gaze over to you, soon letting go of Minho when you flash him a crooked smile. “My name is Y/N, second in command of the royal guards and I’ll be stuck with this dimwit for a while, it’s a pleasure to meet you.”

Jisung reciprocates your bow, the look in his eyes softening a bit, “And I’m Han Jisung, freelance dealer, single, I’m looking for a—“ Minho finds it irksome how his friend is already out and about, starting a proper conversation without almost getting killed by you so his fist moves on its own, jabbing against the blond’s stomach, forcing air out of his mouth with a low grunt. 

“Don’t mind him,” he turns sideways to reassure you, holding back the twitching muscles on his face. “He’s a decent person, despite how creepy he can be sometimes.” Jisung then elbows him harshly as a payback, making a scene when they start wrestling with each other like a bunch of toddlers. This makes you snort involuntarily, the Black Swordsman isn’t as fully-fledged as what’s been told around the public.

“Kids, that’s enough,” you tell them after making a grab for one of your pouches on Noir’s back. “Minho, why don’t you go meet up with the blacksmith? And Jisung, do you perhaps have a kitchen that I can borrow?”

While Minho’s mumbling something under his breath, hugging both of his and your sword to his chest to make his way behind the counter, Jisung nods at you, lifting a curtain next to a shelf full of weapons, gems, crystals, and potions that leads you down a dark, narrow hallway. “It’s not much,” he says and lights a candle so none of you would trip over each other. “But I hope it helps.”

“Don’t even, doing all of this for a stranger like me is incredibly generous of you,” you say humbly, not wanting to take anything for granted. “I’ll definitely return the favor when I come back.”

Jisung stops walking all of a sudden, causing you to almost bump into his back. “Is that so? Then, uhh…” he scratches the nape of his neck sheepishly. “How do I say this..? I know Minho can be irrational sometimes, loves pretending like he doesn’t care, and always runs into fire. So please..” His throat starts growing dry as he lowers his head a bit, attempting to bow at you.

“Take care of him for me, will you?”

You smile at the blond-haired boy, warmth flaring through your rib cage like butterflies, “I assure you he’s in good hands.”

six.

That night, you and Minho spend the whole night, the next morning, and the afternoon walking barefooted from Kalmburg to a small village at the base of the Restless Cliffs called Drachens Hohle. And it’s anything but Kalmburg. Rustic cabins dot the grassy hills as trees stand up like spikes, zigzagging the border of brick roads and unpolished homes. Rivers stream through deep valleys. The town is as complex as the heart, the streets are the veins, paved with red stones and the people are the heart. They look like they don’t own much, but are willing to share everything and anything. It’s the smiles on their faces, the way they greet each other, the sound of weapons and breastplates being pounded into shape that shows you just how alive this small community can be.

The motel Minho chooses looks like one of those places where men with beer guts would be snooping around with their neighbor’s wife, paying by the hour; a place where random hookers and drug-dealers would thrive. There are external wooden stairs that lead to a second floor, the second row of doors, that looks like the building inspector was either bribed to pass it or drunk on the job. You insist on finding a better place than this rat-hole but Minho said you don’t have to waste a couple of extra pennies just so the beds can be softer.

After dinner, you both receive your own keys before going upstairs to your respective rooms. A dingy place like this isn’t able to provide much when it comes to furniture anyway so there’s only a plain bed with pillows and a blanket, a nightstand with a pitch of water, and a small candle beside it. You sigh while casting your eyes around the room one last time. It’s just for one night.

“Y/N,” Minho gives your door a few knocks. “Are you asleep yet? I have something to tell you.”

You’re still halfway done with unpacking your stuff so you try to yell back without turning on your heels, “Not yet, just come in. I didn’t lock the door.”

He hums as a response before pushing against the wooden surface, closing it with a small ‘click’ after. “I just ran into the mayor downstairs,” Minho starts speaking and that’s when you finish putting your sword away, turning to look at him. And your cheeks inevitably grow hot since the first thing you have to lay your poor eyes on is his collarbones. This bastard really has the audacity to keep his buttons anywhere but a degree of appropriation. 

“Hey, focus,” he snaps his fingers as an attempt to knock you out of your trance, not noticing how he’s obviously the distraction. “It took an hour for him after rambling about his childhood and his love for the village to finally spill something about the kind of crystal that we need. At least pretend like you’re paying attention, will you?”

“I was paying attention,” you mumble loud enough for yourself to hear it. What a white lie. 

Minho quirks a brow and leans himself against the wall, looking amused, “Hmm, sure you did. Now, where were we? Ah! The mayor said those things aren't very hard to find, the only problem is that the field where they grow is right in front of a dragon’s den. No one has ever made it back in one piece. Chances are there might be other random monsters on the way…” 

Suddenly he stops talking, confusing you. “What’s wrong-“

The stiff look on his face seals your lips almost immediately. Faster than a lightning bolt, Minho turns the doorknob and rushes outside. “Who’s there?!” he snaps at the hooded figure running towards the end of the dark hallway, reaching for the sword on his back only to realize it’s not there. “Shit, this isn’t good.”

“Someone was eavesdropping. We’ve got ourselves a spy.” You close the door again after Minho walks inside, facepalming himself onto your bed dreadfully. 

He supports himself upward on his forearms and runs a hand through his hair, “Look, I’m not saying this because I’m doubting your abilities, I just want to guarantee your safety as much as I can. Their motives and patterns are getting pretty much unpredictable.” When he looks straight into your eyes with his warm, brown ones, your heart dips ever so gently. “Would you mind if I were to spend the night in your room?”

Your lips grow agape, your jaw almost drops to the floor. No one has ever asked to spend the night in the same room as you, not even Ryujin—your closest friend out of all the royal guards. Heck, you’ve barely known this man for a good three days yet why is it that your heart didn’t even hesitate? Are you scared? Most definitely not. Then what is it? What’s this weird, fuzzy feeling that’s been stirring inside your stomach for who knows how long?

“.....fine, but don’t try anything.”

Your heart is being weak again.

“Just what do you think you’re doing?”

You place your hands on either side of your hip when Minho comes back from his room with his pillows and blanket scattered all over the floor, organizing them neatly with his sword leaning against your nightstand. He flickers his eyes upward to look at your judgmental ones, slightly shaking from the cold and nervousness. “I’m getting comfortable?” he tells you, blinking innocently. 

Shaking your head at Minho, you snatch the pillow from his hands and situate it on your bed, right beside your own. “Hurry up now before I change my mind,” you decide after some time of consideration. The floor doesn’t look necessarily clean, and it’s not like Jisung would pack any extra clothes for him to change into. You’re just being nice like any normal, civil human being would. You’re sharing a bed with a stranger, nothing out of the ordinary. 

“Oh, I’m good,” Minho scratches his head with a sheepish smile. “The floor is fine for me.” Although the cheap material of the mattress does look more convincing than the hard, cement surface. 

You squint your eyes at him skeptically, “Are you sure?” He then puts his hands up in defeat as though you’re pointing a knife at his throat and motions for you to scoot over with a wave of his hand. You both shuffle around after he slips into the blanket with you, shifting until you’re facing the wall while Minho’s staring awkwardly at the front door. Well, this is kinda nice, he thinks to himself when your back brushes over his every now and then. 

“Uhh, sleep tight, I guess?” Minho says before leaning over the nightstand to blow out the candle. 

“Goodnight to you too,” you spew out your last words of the day, deciding to keep your lips close before you embarrass yourself any further. Okay...maybe one last thing before you completely pass out. “Uhm, Minho?”

He replies softly, “Yeah?” Seems like he can’t fall asleep either. 

Minho tosses himself over the moment you move your body and this causes your faces to be inches apart, his warm breath fanning your cheeks. Although you can’t see him clearly due to the limited source of light, those round eyes are definitely piercing right through you, leaving your heart pounding faster than usual. 

“Can you tell me…” you nibble on your bottom lip hesitantly. “What happened between you and Changbin? You guys weren’t being very civil for old friends.”

When he shifts slightly again to face the ceiling, his arm brushes against yours but he does nothing about it. He likes the lingering warmth from the tips of your fingers. 

You watch in awe as Minho stares up at nothing, broken bits of sadness floating softly inside his irises like an unwanted scar from his past; it’s tragically beautiful. “It was years ago when this whole monster hunting thing started,” he starts calmly, finding it hard to not look at you. “I wasn’t alone, Changbin was there with me too.”

Then, he continues, not knowing that you’re widening your eyes at him, “We were in an assault team, traveling all over the Continent and making a living out of slaying those creatures. We didn’t have much back then, but we had each other. Unfortunately, everyone has their own secrets despite our promise of not hiding anything from each other. Changbin was planning on leaving the group to go on a different path, and I...I would secretly sneak out alone every night, throwing myself into danger, thinking that I wasn’t good enough…Truth is, I was just being selfish.” His voice trails off, trembling as if each word pains him, like a thousand arrow wounds straight into his heart.

Bitter. Unforgiving. Pain. 

“I knew that I was lying to them, that I should just leave without saying anything,” Minho swallows hard like someone’s stepping on him, forcing air out of his lungs mercilessly. 

“But I never belonged anywhere, they were all that I had—my only family. I longed for that warmth, that feeling of being at ease so I just, I couldn’t leave. One day, we were hired to clear out a dungeon through an anonymous letter. It raised some skepticisms in my head since I’ve gone there before, there was nothing, no monsters, no nothing. Even so, I was held back by my own cowardice, I was afraid they might question me. I didn’t stop them when they accepted the job, it was good money.”

Your voice fails you when you open your mouth to say something, so you wordlessly slips your hand into his, hoping that you’ll be able to convey some of your heat to his cold fingers. As if feeling encouraged by your action, he doesn’t push you away and regains his composure. 

“Turns out, my intuitions were right, we got scammed,” Minho says. “A group full of criminals attacked, wanting to keep all of our money for their own. We cooperated and gave them everything, yet that wasn’t enough. They needed to seal our lips for good….Only Changbin and I made it out alive, three mobsters from the gang died under my blade that day. I confessed to Changbin later on, he didn’t forgive me. I couldn’t forgive myself either, the only family I’d ever have was gone, my arrogance and pride killed them.”

Silently, you pull him towards you, caressing the back of his head like he’s gonna fall apart the moment you let him go. Minho’s breath hitches in his throat as he sees you wear a smile on your face, your starry eyes twinkling when moonlight slips through the crack of the wood-lined window, pieces of glass chipping off on the edges. You’re breathtaking, unearthly. 

“I’m not going to die, I know that you’ll protect me just fine.” There’s a wide-eyed expression on his face, his lips falling open but his words die in his throat. A tear unknowingly rolls down on his cheek, consequently blurring his vision with waves of sadness that only the broken would encounter. You let him nuzzle his head into the crook of your neck, his fists grabbing at your shirt until his knuckles turn white. 

Minho cries into your chest unceasingly, “I don’t have any real strength. Without my sword, without the anonymity that has been casting terror and curiosity on people, I’m just Lee Minho, the coward who only ever knows how to run away and hide behind the shadow of the Black Swordsman. Changbin was right, I don’t have any right to even think about protecting you.”

“My father used to tell me,” you stroke his hair gently as choked sobs punch through him, pulling him back from the opening arms of his grief. “Strength is simply an illusion, there are far more important things.” 

He stops for a moment, nostalgia hurling him back to the memories of two decades ago when he was still just a boy, training hard with his wooden sword while someone watched him from afar, a pleased look lingering on their lips. Tears pool in his eyes again when that person’s face flashes inside his mind but the hollow space inside his heart isn’t the same, there’s a ray of joy that’s managed to make its way through a crack of his walls. 

“And I don’t care if you’re the Black Swordsman or not, I only know the cryptic-looking guy who crossed swords with me and wasn’t willing to back down that day. I knew, I just knew that even without a sword, you could have beaten me. Because fighting isn’t an obligation, it’s a choice. A choice whether you’re going to fight until the very end or not.”

His tears can’t extinguish what has happened, yet only carry him forward until a time comes when that searing pain is distant enough to forget rather than remembering. And maybe one day, it might erase itself from his conscience for good. So perhaps it’s not much of an oddity to thank the salty liquid streaming down on his cheekbones. They’re a living proof for his morality, a barrier to save him from becoming a monster—indifferent to suffering and sorrow. 

Minho sees the fatherly smile on his mentor’s face, just like the old days. And then he sees you through his blurred vision, momentarily breathless at how close you are. 

“After all, I have a promise to keep,” you tell him but it comes out more like a reminder for yourself. “I won’t let you die even when I’m no longer capable of picking up my sword and I mean it. As vice commander of the royal guards, you have my words, Lee Minho.”

An ignited desire wells up at the bottom of his heart, and it baffles him. Lee Minho, a coward who’s willing to turn his back on everyone just so he alone can exist. A bastard who betrayed his only friends, who didn’t even try to plead for forgiveness, who coldly walked away from those painful memories. Such a self-absorbed being like him doesn’t deserve a simple ally, let alone something much more intimate than that.

Then he starts to remember why he’s here, with you. Your smile. Your voice. Memories are flooding back into his head about this girl who made her way into his life abruptly yet so easily. And before he knows it, she’s all that’s on his mind. 

So instead of giving in to his nightmares like he would every other night, Minho stops reminiscing his bloodied past, surrendering under the sense of familiarity radiating off your touch.

seven.

You both stand in awe as the great mountains loom before your eyes, cold grey crevices holding the blood of the fallen. While the lower passes wear a cloak of greenery, the peaks are crowned with a headdress of ice. As though the earth has a pulse, it rises through the mountains, creating their bold silhouette. From carved rocky outcrops, waterfalls drifting like skeins of white lawn, and in the fields, you can see the amber glint of the rivers and the occasional mirror-like flash of the lake. 

The mountains soar upward like they wish to plant a soft kiss on heaven, wanting to have a taste of the horizon all around. The path ahead winds as effortlessly as a blanket laid on a bed, yet each step feels heavier than the previous one, draining your energy. It only gets steeper and narrower as you make your way closer to the top, but giving up is not an option. You’re willing to go to the other side of the world barefooted, searching for every corner, every edge of this planet if it means bringing your brother back. 

A gust of wind howls in the distance, piling up snow in drifts, blinding your eyesight with ice-white dust. You try walking, bending over against the cold, protecting your eyes with your clothed forearms. Everything looms into your vision before vanishing completely, swallowed in white. “Minho?” you call out to him after a few minutes of not looking forward, waving one of your hands around until it can feel something. 

Another hand reaches for yours, and you snap out of your daze when the coldness on the tips of his fingers is clasped against your palm. “You’re as slow as a baby turtle,” he comments lamely while staring ahead, not letting you see the coral shade scattered across his cheeks. “Let’s just hurry up and get back, I’m hungry.” 

Breath pale against the numbing air, you blink thoughtfully while gazing down at the sight of his fingers being intertwined with yours as the frost patiently kisses your face. He’s still wearing the same old pair of fingerless gloves, no wonder his hands are freezing. But you suppose it’s because he doesn’t want the grip on his sword to slip. 

“Oh, I actually have something for us to eat,” you retract your hand to fish it inside your bag, already missing his warmth. “I guess we should have lunch, either way, we’ve been walking before the sun even rose.”

Minho makes a noise of confusion before bringing his steps to a halt, turning his head to see you pull out something being wrapped neatly in paper, giving it a slight jerk towards his direction when he continues to stare at you blankly. Wordlessly, he takes it and sighs, eyes widening when the smell of grilled meat invaded his nostrils. Inside the wrapper is a sandwich made from thinly sliced bread, generously stuffed with meat and vegetables. The peppery aroma inevitably makes his stomach rumble and without another word, Minho chomps on his lunch portion like a hungry child; the sandwich is long gone before he realizes it. 

“It’s...good,” he licks his lips to clean up the remaining sauce in the corners of his mouth. It doesn’t look any different from the ones he’s seen inside restaurants but the taste is what reminds him of something he ate as a kid, he almost teared up while inhaling it. “Where did you buy this? I’ll make sure to pass by the place when we get back.”

“I didn’t buy it,” you stride ahead of him to hide the giddiness in your stomach. “I made it yesterday at Jisung’s place. That’s why the bread got a little soggy if you couldn’t tell already.”

Minho fixes his collar and his hearty laughs echoes through your eardrums, stirring up feelings inside your stomach unabating. “You would make a fortune out of these,” he tells you while trying to catch up, following your steps in a hassle. “But now that I‘m thinking about it again, you shouldn’t do that, I’d hate to see people getting to enjoy the same food as me with some cheap units.”

You blush (out of anger) at his statement and attempt to cover it up by stepping onto his toes. This causes him to yelp while stumbling backward, almost falling onto his bottom. “Why did you feel the need to do that?!”

“I can just make you more if you like it that much, you jerk,” you murmur mostly to yourself but he hears it nonetheless. 

A smile makes its way to his lips, and a fuzzy feeling bubbles up inside his stomach. He’s not sure what it is, but he’s not complaining, really. It’d be nice if he could have the same delicious meals when he’d retired, dozing off while watching the sunset with his significant other and his own kids in his arms. It’d be nice if he could have a place to come back to when he needs a break, a shoulder to lean on and someone to tuck him into bed. It’d be nice if… He looks at you again after those shameless thoughts and immediately, embarrassment dusts his cheeks pink. His face feels hot despite the puffs of cold air escaping his lips. 

“Hey,” Minho pulls you to a stop by the hand, suddenly giving it a squeeze. “I just wanted to say thank you…” A glint of anticipation gleams in your gaze when you both lock eyes, prompting him to look away. “Thank you, for...the meal, it was nice. I might as well bother you a little longer to eat more good food.” Lee Minho you coward. 

“Do you only think about your stomach?“ you almost gawk at him, raising your hand to give him a slap in the face but Minho grabs your hand before you can do so. The next thing you know, his other hand is on the top of your head, ruffling your hair in a playful manner. 

He tells you and trudges on, grinning to himself, “Let’s get moving, we’re wasting time.”

“....Minho?”

“Hmm?” he turns around with a lovesick smile on his face but that’s not what you’re paying attention to.

“You might want to look out for that…”

“For what-“ 

Minho swallows heavily when he sees an enormous figure overhanging his shadow on the white snow. Slowly, his gaze follows the sound of faint yet sturdy footsteps and he holds his breath, eyes twice as white as before. 

“Just to be clear…” he asks breathlessly. “Dragons are nocturnal, right?”

“Correct,” you subconsciously take a step back. “And we might have woken it up.”

Minho takes notice in the thick stripe of black streaking down on one of its claws, and his face morphs into a frown when his surroundings reek off the smell of fresh blood. “No, someone else did.”

The dragon’s scales gleam dashingly in the sunlight, they are its pride and delight, violet streaks blending into a deep blue at the end. Its teeth so cold and sharp like icicles, they can easily rip any armors into mere ribbons of skin and bones. In its chest holds a hearth of ever flickering flame although the remorseless heart remains rime. Eyes with a shade of crimson as deep as the liquid that’s coursing through your veins, nourishing you; those eyes are seemingly endless pools of wisdom and intelligence.

But once those red pupils dilate and focus on the two mundane mortals before themselves, a glint of gold is suddenly evident, almost alarmed. The dragon takes off into the air with its wings stretched leathery like a bat, sending a small snowstorm flying towards the both of you. Minho squints his eyes hard while you’re shielding your vision with your forearms, coats fluttering as wind whistles into your ears.

Minho calmly takes a step forward, flashing you a smile sideways. What is he doing? 

Then, he spares you one last glance before drawing his sword. As though triggered by the sound of metal scraping against the leather sheath, the dragon flaps its majestic wings and inhales, heaps of glowing embers come swirling in midair, twirling towards Minho with a fiery dance. He’s just simply there, feet planted firmly on the ground as though challenging the creature’s deadly breath. 

“Minho, what are you doing?!” you yell at him, trying to keep your balance as the ground begins to tremble. “Get out of there!!”

Pretending not to listen to your warnings, Minho gets into his stance, blade angling low with his knees. What happens next downright baffles you. The blade of his sword glimmers with a shade of purple, his feet taking off towards the plume of fire that soon engulfs his figure completely in your vision. 

You squeeze your eyes shut not just because of the heat but also because you can’t bring yourself to see it. Once the air around you cools off, your eyes flutter open again to see Minho angling his head over his shoulder, throwing you a wink in the process. Did he just counter a dragon’s breath with his sword?

“Chaeryeong taught me that. Neat trick, isn’t it?” he says with a grin while you’re blinking at him in utter shock; he looks almost proud of successfully deflecting that breath attack. “I use magic more often than you’d think. Nothing major, only the basic things. Enough to keep me alive.”

“I still think we need to run first.”

Minho looks at you dejectedly, “Don’t you have a better plan?”

With a howl as loud as any sky-born thunder, the dragon flaps its wings more vigorously this time, flinging the layer of snow under your feet into a blizzard—a swirling storm of screaming silver, a primal force than conquers until its core explodes. Everything around you is almost white-out as you bat your hands around helplessly in the middle of this snowstorm. After a while, you can no longer feel your legs, it’s like the storm just sweeps you off your feet. You’re not sure if it’s because of the cold or-

What the…?

You widen your eyes in a panic; you’re falling. Your perception of time distorts, your surroundings slow down until there’s nothing, only you, the sky above, and a hole that’s only a few hundred feet away from where you were standing previously. Your hand reaches out to the canvas above, grasping the endless crevasse of blue. 

Everything’s a blur, a blur that swirls out of existence. Suspended in the air for a few seconds, you close your eyes and take a deep breath, letting your tense muscles relax. You won’t die from the fall since there’s a likelihood that snow’s already covered the pit. But you can’t just let yourself fall freely, that would cause minor, unnecessary injuries. So you reach for your sword, planning to jab it against the rocky surface as an attempt to go against gravity. 

Once the metal comes in contact with the side of the pit, tiny flares of fire flutter in the air as if the sword is being sharpened by a blacksmith, an ear-piercing sound hisses against your eardrums. The stab is strong enough to slow gravity down from pulling you downward any faster but it’s not enough to make you stop completely. 

Chan, you think while screwing your eyes shut, every cell inside your body is shaking, every muscle is aching. You can’t give up now, not when you’re still in one piece, and Chan’s hanging on the edge of not getting his old life back. You can’t give up not knowing who’s the culprit, not just yet. 

And you’d rather be cursed than making out of this place alive and leaving Minho behind. Your conscience won’t ever forgive you. 

When that thought crosses your mind, you grit your teeth and suddenly the sword stops sliding down, leaving you dangling midair on one arm. The rapier is too slender, it won’t hold on for long, and it’s not like you can climb all the way up to the top. 

A mighty, fearsome roar blares through your brain like wildfire so you flutter your eyes upward to see the dragon with its wings folded on both sides, diving at an immaculate speed into the hole, in your direction. 

There’s my ride. 

eight.

Once the blizzard settles down, the setting sun comes with a sky of fire, the orange of every wintry hearth. The color stretches far and wide along the horizon like a reflection of the dawn that comes after the velvety night. 

That’s when Minho sees them. 

The crystals have grown as something alive may do, thriving over the ages, through many generations. As such they become a rainbow sea made of perfect rocks, the shoreline ever-present and still with colors that shine in the brilliant light of a richness that only nature can bring. Minho might feel bad when he snaps off a piece, it’s like cutting a single, healthy rose in the middle of the thorny garden. But if it’s for Chan, he’s certain that you’d do anything at any cost. 

Minho sheaths his sword and sighs, turning around, “Y/N are you okay?” All that he’s met with is a muffled silence, the cold wind whistling into his ears, the hollow space before his eyes white-out and empty.

“Y/N?” Nothing. 

“Y/N!!” No one answers. “Y/N!!!”

No, he lets out a choked whimper. No, no, no.

His legs tremble inside his boots, his lips quivering, his fists clenched, his fingers turning cold. And the thing that terrifies him most? His heart feels like someone is grasping on it so tightly as though they’re going to crush it with their bare hands. 

A seed of fear suddenly grows inside his rib cage, thriving at an abrupt pace, branching out, gripping onto every cell, every muscle inside his body. He can’t breathe. This can’t be it, he tells himself, tumbling backward a bit. He promised not to let this happen. He swore. Yet his biggest nightmare is only one step away from becoming a reality. 

Minho wants to cry your name aloud over and over again until his vocal cords are torn apart, he wants to be vulnerable for once and let himself fall. How is he going to face Chan? And Changbin? And his own conscience? He might as well run his own sword through his heart because what would be the point in living if you’re no longer here?

All of this was a grave mistake. If only he didn’t throw the dart. If only you didn’t come with him. None of this would have happened. None of this would have happened if he didn’t accept that damned offer. He could have easily flipped you off the second that duel was finished and gone on this trip by himself. And face the scythe of Death alone, by himself, like he always does. He should have died alone, he deserves to die alone. 

But this time, he didn’t make the right decision and the consequences are horrendous. He gave in because of your stubbornness, your determination, your bossy nature. He let you in and his walls came down tumbling one by one, his stern and trained facade shredded into pieces. His head is a mess whenever he sees your smile, his heart can permit you to tread on his boring life. And because of those merely unguarded moments, he’s killed another person that he truly cares about other than himself.

Wait, something clicks inside his head. He almost forgets the most important thing of all. The culprit. 

Minho regains his composure and snaps his head back towards the crystals. The sun might be going down but its limited source of light is more than adequate to cast a shadow onto the snowy white surface. The shadow of a person, a person that’s not you. The shadow that sets a silent inferno inside his chest, the flame spreading by the ticking second. 

“I have been waiting for you,” he turns on his heels, reaching for the hilt of his sword. “Hwang Hyunjin.”

The shadow visibly flinches before stepping out, a hand outstretching from the black cloak to pull down the hood. When Hyunjin’s face comes into view, Minho’s muscles tense up, anguish making his head a little dizzy. But he maintains his cold front, not letting his opponent see how much this is affecting him. 

“I’ve got a feeling that you’d already figured it out the moment I visited the cabin,” Hyunjin says slyly, his facial expression rather relaxed. “And I was so close to silencing you little errand boy for good too, but I’ll admit, the little brat is well trained, he ran off before I could catch him. So tell me, Black Swordsman, where did I slip?”

“Your eyes,” Minho grits. “They weren’t staring at Chan with what’s supposed to be concern or relief. You were looking at him like a predator watching its prey from afar. If I weren’t keeping an eye on you, who knows what you would have done to him. He didn’t sound pleased when you touched him either.”

Hyunjin drops his cloak to the ground, laughing under his breath, “You are sharper than I’d expected.” He takes a few steps closer forward, craning his neck tiredly before drawing his sword, causing Minho to do the same. “Now, now, vice commander, an innocent man is about to be killed because of you.”

Minho can only snicker at the statement, “I’m not planning on going down easily.”

“So am I,” Hyunjin gets ready in his stance, glaring at his opponent. “I wasn’t really planning on dealing with you. I would rather end her and let you take the blame. Actually, that sounds like a better plan! Don’t you agree? No one would put their trust in you—a low, damned being who lives off the upper classes’ bloodied pennies.”

With his blood boiling hot, Minho inhales and exhales deeply to keep his voice calm. “End her?” he repeats after the guard. End her. Hyunjin hasn’t made a single move yet he feels like someone just stabbed him in the gut. How could he?! You trusted Hyunjin, you went through so much with him, you trained him. And now he’s just going to turn around and bite the hand that fed him? Traitor. “Over my dead body.” 

Hyunjin lunges forward, his feet sprinting quickly and he brings his blade up from a lower angle while Minho attempts to clash him from the head down. Both of their swords get knocked away on different sides from the harsh contact. Before Hyunjin can raise his weapon again, Minho sword slices at him sideways but he luckily deflects it in time—the reflexes and muscle memories from his training are kicking in. 

“Why are you doing this? Aren’t you her friend?”

Minho’s sword aims for his head once again; however, Hyunjin steps to the side and makes a grab for his hand, holding his weapon down. This makes Minho lose his balance for a few seconds while Hyunjin tries to cleave his neck. He stumbles on his heels at the last second, only getting away with a small cut on his cheekbone. The pain isn’t even there, he’s been beaten up ten times worse before, this is nothing. He’s practically numb by now. 

“Friend?” Hyunjin drags his sword against the ground before bringing it up to stop a slash at his chest, throwing snow into Minho’s eyes. He groans agonizingly when the white matters’ coldness burns his skin, blurring his vision. “She and Chan only care about themselves! They are the ones who get all the praises and recognition after a mission. Little rumps like me and Changbin?”

He angrily tightens the grip on his weapon, dragging a long slice downward, “We didn’t have any title, we’re merely just two faces amongst a hundred of the other guards. We get treated like we don’t even exist!”

“Did Y/N ever treat you that way? And Chan too?” Minho heaves after dodging the blow by rolling on the ground. He’s circling around the guard, trying to keep his mind clear. “From what I’ve seen, she seems to care about you and Changbin as much as she does about her brother. 

Hyunjin swings his sword at him, and Minho receives the hit with the edge of his blade. The sound of metal scraping against each other is pricking at his eardrums but he can care less, he won’t be dying today. “So you can break my soul,” Minho pants before both of them stagger backward, switching their initial position. “Take everything away from me.”

“Beat me up.” Another blocked blow. 

“Tear me into pieces.” Anger almost tears through his mind again. Anger towards Hyunjin for betraying Chan, you, and his entire team. Anger for falling into his trap. Anger for not being able to keep you safe. He wishes he could just unleash all of his hatred and rage on the guard. But what can he do? He’s one to blame too, after all. 

“Or kill me, even.”

Hyunjin catches up to Minho when he starts sprinting away to regain his vision, the two of them running side by side, in between the lined up crystals. Thrusting his sword at Minho in various directions, Hyunjin’s stabs are getting messy because of the limited amount of space. 

“But I will tell you something, you’d better listen to me and listen to me for good.” Minho’s sword strikes at him but he blocks it in time, their faces inches apart and their weapons threatening to snap each other into half. 

“Touch Y/N.” A low grunt escapes Hyunjin’s lips when Minho jabs his fist against his stomach, forcing air out from his lungs. “And I am going to give you a taste of hell. I have been there before, and you know what? You would be begging me for a painless death by then.”

When the guard falls onto his knees, his weapon dropping by his side with a loud clangor, Minho directs the tip of his sword on top of Hyunjin’s head. “Think about it again, do you think that all of this is really worth it?”

A sinister laugh echoed through his ears and Minho’s eyes grow alarmed when the blood trickled down on his cheek starts to harden a little. No, something’s wrong. “You spoke too soon,” Hyunjin tells him with a devilish tone, the corners of his lips being tugged up into a smirk. 

What is this? On the tip of his fingers reveals a dark shade of blue, it almost reminds him of the royal guards’ uniform. Suddenly his body collapses, he can’t feel his muscles, he can do nothing. His sword is so far away from his grip, he can’t even move his fingers. Paralytic poison. “You bastard!”

Hyunjin pushes himself off the ground, holding his sword by the hilt when the tip is faced downward. “I suppose this is the end. Our encounter is rather short but it was a pleasure to cross swords with the infamous Black Swordsman,” he raises it, chuckling. “Goodbye, Lee Minho.”

Minho locks his jaw, his muscles tense but he can’t move, his eyes are shut while he braces himself for the contact. But it never comes. A growl as loud and frightening as a clap of thunder rumbles through the sky and that’s when Minho opens his eyes to see the shadow of a dragon flying not too high above. Next thing he knows, a figure jumps off, falling rapidly like a lightning bolt. 

Your foot slams onto Hyunjin’s shoulder, causing him to fall back while you land on the ground safely. Before he can register the situation, your rapier is drawn to yank his long sword away. “Hyunjin?” you grit with tears brimming in your eyes. “Why?”

Hyunjin doesn’t respond, instead, he takes a few strides towards you wordlessly. You don’t raise your weapon nor retreat it, simply keeping it limp by your side. But he lifts the blade of your sword with his hands and swiftly runs it through his stomach, blood splattering everywhere. His arms are weak, yet he still tries to put one of them around your back, pulling you closer and leaning his head on your shoulder. “Congratulations, vice commander,” he taunts into your ear. 

“You’re a murderer.”

nine.

Chan finds himself waking up on a plain bed, a white blanket draped over him, and a cold towel on his head. All the mayhem from the past week comes crashing down on him like a tsunami, banging against his temple. He tries to push himself up but his limbs are too wobbly—it feels foreign, it’s like he’s inside someone else’s body and not his own. With every move, his head pulses in agony, and his muscles ache.

The pain stops when he sees you sleeping soundly against his bed, your head rested on your forearms. Another figure is present too, on the couch staring blankly at the flickering fireplace. Opening his mouth to speak, Chan scrunches his nose in pain as he accidentally strains his vocal cords but no words come out, only incoherent sounds. 

“...Chan?” you rub the sleep away from your eyes, yawning tiredly. 

“Ah..ah..ah,” Chan can only lift his arms, calling out to you in desperation. His eyes grow stingy at the sound of your voice and before he knows it, tears are already rolling down in his cheeks relentlessly. 

“Chan, it’s alright,” you hush him softly, slipping your arms around him and holding him tight. “Everything’s fine now, you’re safe. You’ve done enough.” You bury your face into the crook of his neck, that way he won’t be able to see your glassy eyes. This isn’t the time to cry in front of him. 

The door closes with a sharp thud.

Chan only convinces himself that he’s still alive, and back to his human form, not being buried six feet under the ground somewhere when your fingers graze the dull lines that his tears leave behind. A sense of relief washes over him the moment he sees your smile, though insomnia has been carved into your features over time. You’re safe, he closes his eyes. You’re not hurt. 

That’s all that matters. 

“Wait for me here, I’ll call Yeji in,” you give his hands one last squeeze. Chan pulls you back for a second there, a faint frown adorns his face. “Just leave the rest to me, we’re going to be alright.” 

With Chan’s weak smile as an approval, you dash outside, finding Minho standing like a soulless being at the front door of the cabin. He can’t bring himself to face you after what he did. His body is tired, his mind is a mess, and his heart is filled with sorrow. Even his sword seems too heavy for his existence, it’s weighing him down, making him not be able to move. 

“This was all my fault, wasn’t it?”

You don’t answer him and instead outstretch your hand, letting your fingers tug at the sheath of his sword. “Minho, it’s no one’s fault,” you mumble with your head hung low. “I dragged you into this. If anything, I’m the one to blame.”

“No!” His sudden outburst makes you flinch; hence you pull your hand back with a wide-eyed expression on your face. “If I hadn’t thrown that dart, we wouldn’t have met. If you hadn’t followed me on the trip, nothing would have happened! None of this would have happened! You almost died back there, Y/N. Do you know how much it scared me?”

“So you’re just going to leave me like this?” you raise your voice, trying not to snap at him. “After everything, you’re still going to turn away from me? Just like how you did to everyone else?”

“I-“ 

“Lee Minho, if you claimed to care about me so much-”

“I should stay away from you, I will only cause you more trouble. Even worse, I will get you in danger. I won’t forgive myself if anything happens to you.” His heart clenches at his own words as his shoulders shake, arms tense on his sides. 

You reach for his hand, and huff in determination, “Stick to your words and protect me then.”

ten.

It’s been a week since the incident happened. Hyunjin has managed to live after the fight, yet he wants to keep his lips sealed for a while as to why he intended to harm the commander of his team in the first place. For now, he’s being kept in the dungeon while the king and queen permit you to do whatever. After all, he didn’t cause the kingdom any trouble. And if you were being honest, you would forgive Hyunjin without a second thought just so things can be normal again. It’s not as easy as you’d hoped. 

Minho, on the other hand, has been praised tremendously by everyone in court for what he did. His name has been cleansed and every flighty rumor or gossip about him has been cleared out. He doesn’t like this at all, journalists are starting to snoop around Jisung’s place, leaving him no choice but to stay at Yeji’s log house for some time. His reputation was what used to keep him safe, now everything’s being flipped upside down. 

He stares at his own reflection in the mirror from across the room. Minho can’t tell if it’s because he’s only worn the color black for the longest time or he’s being irrational, but he thinks the white loose shirt and matching pants that the mage brought back last night from the castle just don’t look right. Is his own moniker messing with his head? Probably. 

Glancing sideways to catch a glimpse of his sword on his bed, he exhales dejectedly. I look like a joke, Minho thinks to himself. 

“I never knew the Black Swordsman would look this dashing in white,” Chan enters his room with a dimpled smile on his face, Changbin following him suit. He’s recovering from the past week of living his life as a wolf, it’s still quite hard for Chan to walk so Yeji forced him to use a wheelchair for the time being. 

“Don’t you guys have any clothes that aren’t so flashy?” Minho cracks a crooked smile, feeling unfamiliar being dressed in such a bright color. “I look ridiculous.”

Chan chuckles wholeheartedly and shakes his head, “Actually, that’s one of our less flashy ones. Don’t worry, you look great.”

“Why are you here, anyway?” Minho’s question isn’t necessarily directed towards Chan, but rather the person standing behind him. “If you want to curse me for the things I’ve done, then fine, I accept it. I will leave Kalmburg and move to the other side of the Continent. You’ll never have to see me again.”

Changbin steps forward, and with a deep breath, he says, “Thank you, Minho.” 

Minho can’t believe his ears, did he just—

“Thank you,” Changbin says again; this time more firmly, and the look in his eyes softening. In those brown orbs, Minho can once again see the look he used to be met with five years ago, no hatred or anger, just warmth. He missed this. A ‘thank you’ has never sounded so nerve-calming before. It’s genuine, it’s real. Heartwarming, almost. 

“When you told me that you would protect her,” Changbin continues, gaze cast downward. “I almost believed you, I knew you weren’t lying. It felt like that day after we both got out of the dungeon all over again. My anger always got the best of me and I just burst. I never gave you the chance to explain yourself, I never got to know your reasons. I am sorry because I didn’t care about you enough, as a friend.”

“I am sorry too,” Minho rises from his seat on the bed, suppressing the happiness inside his ribcage. “I’m sorry I bailed on you that day, I think about it all the time.”

He pauses for a moment and sees Changbin outstretching his hand, the familiar broad smile dancing on his lips. Minho accepts his friend’s warm handshake and reciprocates his grin. “You’d better stay alive first before apologizing.”

Minho widens his eyes, “Of course I am alive!”

“No, I mean,” Changbin waves his hand dismissively. “I was going to ask you to join us since there’s a good chance that His Majesty won’t turn you down, but then I’d figure, you’re too reckless for us to handle either way. So if you’re planning on going out here and throwing yourself at monsters, you’d better stay safe or I wouldn’t forgive you again. And Y/N would never forgive herself.”

Chan eyes the small box sitting neatly on Minho’s nightstand, and teases, “Speaking of Y/N, when will you tell her?”

Minho scratches the nape of his neck with glowing cheeks, he can physically feel the pink tint darkening by the second. “I don’t know, but soon. I still need to have his permission first,” he leans over to take the box in his palm, opening it carefully. 

The sight of the silver band resting nicely inside makes his chest swell, his beating heart doing its best to not implode from joy. It might be too early, but he’s scared that if he doesn’t do this now, fate is going to be one step ahead and take you away from him forever. 

“Minho!” Yeji calls out to him from behind the door. “Y/N’s here!”

“I wish the best of luck for you then,” Chan tosses a wink in his direction.

eleven.

“No one asked you to come, Han.” Is the first thing Minho spats out when he closes the front door with his bag slung over his shoulder. Jisung’s welcoming grin falls flat on his face at his friend’s cold remark. He really should have got used to these things by now. 

“I did,” you tell him with crossed arms, releasing your grip on Noir’s reign. “Yeji said she’s running low on some herbs so I introduced her to Jisung’s place.”

Minho rolls his eyes to the moon. “Aren’t there more trust-worthy stores for the royal mage? Why would you refer her to that dingy dumpster?” And this statement prompts Jisung to give his knee a harsh kick followed by a mere glare from the younger boy. 

“I actually like his place, it’s cute,” you scoff. He’s just acting out since Jisung always shows up unannounced. 

“Why? It’s a rip-off.”

“Minho, you were living there for free!”

“I’m going to leave you two love birds alone now,” Jisung pushes past you to shoot Minho a mischievous smirk, patting his friend on the shoulder. “Don’t do anything weird to her or Chan is going to cut your arms off.” Actually, you’re fully capable of cutting his arms off yourself if he dared think about doing something damned. The swordsmanship runs in the family after all. 

Your face morphs into a frown when Jisung finally enters the cabin, your head tilted to the side in confusion. “What is he talking about?” you ask but brush it off nonetheless; it’s Jisung, you can’t expect anything less from him. “Forget it, are you ready to go?”

“Yeah,” Minho answers while petting Noir, your horse nudges her nose against his face in return—she’s always been keen on seeing him since day one. “How is your father these days? Last time I’d asked, you told me that he’d retired.”

You nod, resting your palm on the hilt of your sword, “He’s good. He said he’s already too old to train soldiers and he’d rather stay at home. Though he’s getting bored these days since there’s not much to do anymore. He’ll find a new hobby soon enough, he will need to take a break from everything eventually. Father has never let himself rest after our mother passed away, constant work distracts him.”

Minho hears you let out a small sigh and takes another step, his hands finding their way towards yours, collecting your fingers between his, giving them a firm squeeze. 

You give in after a few moments to face him completely, concern is flashing in his eyes while a small smile blooms on his lips. He looks a little tired, probably didn’t get any sleep for the past few days while you’re resolving all the problems in court. Minho never fails to stun you nonetheless, from the curve of his lips to the fullness of his eyelashes and the adoration in his warm eyes for you and only you; they make you feel at ease. 

“Like father, like daughter,” he brushes a strand of hair away from your face and jokes. “You’d better be eating well and getting enough sleep, vice commander.”

You snicker, “Speak for yourself, Black Swordsman, you look terrible.” That’s a lie, he looks absolutely wondrous it’s unfair. 

“I like this color on you,” you giggle after noticing his appearance today. They really don’t have any dark-colored pieces of clothing in the castle. “Look, we’re matching. You’re just not matching with your sword anymore.”

“Y/N.” The merry tone in his voice suddenly drops and Minho looks away, his muscles loosening. “Can I ask you something? But I don’t want you to get mad at me.”

You’re suddenly worried. “What’s wrong?”

“On the day that the incident happened….,” he trails off nervously. “Why didn’t you run away? You could have just left me there and got home safely. There will always be another way to help Chan. The chances of surviving that fight were too slim, there’s no telling what would happen. Why would you—”

“Lee Minho, are you even hearing yourself right now?” you cup his cheeks so that he’ll look at you. “Are you assuming I’m some sort of lowly being who will run away while their partner is in danger? I’d rather die with someone than let that person die in front of my eyes. Especially when it’s you! I would never forgive myself if I ever did that to you. So why are you saying such things?”

Minho reaches for your hand and melts into your touch, exhaling heavily. 

“I don’t know...I’m sorry I think I’m losing my mind. After everything, I’m scared that I might lose you. All I want to do is run away with you, from all of this, from everything. We can live together in someplace far away, where no one can find us,” he clenches his eyes shut. 

“I just- I don’t want you to be in love with someone who always has hell hanging by his doorstep, who gets his hands bloodied for a living, who—“

You place your index finger on his lips and shake your head. “Do you even know who I am in love with? Hm?” you question. 

“I’m in love with the most caring, kindhearted man that the world could ever ask for. Whose heart is so warm and fragile, he’s afraid to let anyone in because of his tough past. Whose will is so unwavering he didn’t even think twice about fighting off a dragon alone. But what makes me fall so stupidly for him, is the fact that despite his wounds and scars, he’d always prioritize other people’s needs before his own. Because he’d rather believe and regret than doubt and regret.”

“Y-You’re in love with me?” he studies your delicate feature in the daylight, his heart going on a rampage. 

You chuckle to yourself, “Yes, more than I should be because you’re a pain in the-“

Minho presses his lips against yours and inhales every word, sealing the nagging in until you respond to the kiss. Your hands find their way up to his soft hair, weaving themselves into the dark locks and dropping to caress his face after. He latches his arms around your waist, pulling your body flush against his so he can have more control of your movements. You’re drowning in his existence as he tugs and nibs at your bottom lip, trailing small kisses down your jawline before pulling away completely. 

“I guess this means you’re in love with me too?” you ask to distract yourself from the heat that’s flaring through your nostrils, setting your heart on fire. 

Your question has him stop for less than a moment, realizing that maybe he is in love with you as much as you are with him. And maybe you want him just as much as he wants you too. 

 He nods curtly, breath shaking, “Yes, yes I am.”

For the longest time, Minho used to forbid himself to cry, smile, and laugh like any sane human being would, as he thinks expressing his emotions is being strong, is protecting himself. But in reality, he’s just running away from his own problems instead of finding ways to solve them. 

Now, he will let himself fall, he will let himself cripple, he will let his tears run freely for strength is simply an illusion, there are far more important things. He will fight for what he believes in, protect what he cares about and run on his bare feet through the entire galaxy if it means he gets to see you at the end of it, if it means you can dive into his arms, safe and sound. 

Then, Minho thinks of what’s inside the little box, making the thing thundering inside his chest skip a beat. “Will you stay by my side forever?” he blinks. 

“Is that even a question?” you convey between labored pants. “Even if fate pulls you to the other side of the universe, I will find you, do you hear me? I will find you and fall in love with you all over again.”

“Very well then,” he holds you by the shoulders; the eagerness in his eyes lights up a curiosity inside you. “Y/N, let’s..” But it’s gone before you can even register. “Let’s get going, we’re going to be late.” It’s not quite the right time yet. He still needs to meet someone before tying you up with him for eternity. 

Because Minho too, will always find you and fall in love with you all over again. If fate has a problem with that, then he won’t be giving a damn. 

[untitledtallgeesepodcast]

[TRANCRIPT] EPISODE 14: ROAD TRIP (NO APOLOGIES)

Cathy  00:03

Hello and welcome back to Untitled Tallgeese Podcast, a podcast where four old friends rewatch and discuss Gundam Wing. I am Cathy, your moderator for this episode, and I am joined as always, by Kat, Mallory, and Caitlin. If you have been following along, you know that this week's episode — Episode 27, Locus of Victory and Defeat and Episode 28, Passing Destinies — are recap episodes, following the unofficial Season Finale from last time. As mentioned previously, we will be spending the bulk of this episode discussing a topic near and dear to all of our hearts, Gundam Wing fanfic from the early 2000ish through the lens of one very special fic, Road Trip by Sunhawk.  But first, there isn't a lot to talk about that's new in episodes 27 and 28, but I would be remiss if I didn't mention two bits of new information we got. First, that Relena has switched wardrobes, and is now in a Sanc Kingdom school uniform. And she no longer is informing Heero that he needs to come over here and kill her but rather to return to her, echoing Quatre's telepathic insight into Heero's Golden Aura from the end of Episode 26. And second, Treize is now being placed under house arrest by the Romefeller Foundation for his speech in front of Duke Dermail. At the end of Episode 28 we see that he's not alone in house arrest, but rather joined by a ghostly Lady Une still in her peaceful ambassador outfit, who joins Treize, as he looks at blueprints of yet another mysterious Gundam-like mobile suit on his laptop, which spoiler alert, is Epyon. I think, you know, these are interesting episodes. And Caitlin, I know you had something to say about the way the recaps are done in 27 and 28.

Caitlin  01:45

Yeah, I think that it's really interesting how they, I mean, that new information comes to us via these framing narratives, where you have Relena, and a little bit Heero, and then Treize narrating everything that's happened to them. So we get a Relena narration where she's much more strongly identifying herself as the ruler of the Sanc Kingdom. And then we get a Treize narration that links together a lot of his dubious political thought, in the midst of his defeat.

Kat  02:18

It felt like the first time we really understood like, exactly what Lady Une thought his politics were, or his plans were and how he changed those plans, like explicitly.

Cathy  02:29

Yes, there was this moment where he reflects on the beauty of where he is trapped, which I believe is the Luxembourg base, but I don't know if they ever say that. And he articulates it as if to say, "this is what I wanted to preserve. This is what I joined OZ thinking it was to preserve," and then traces his change in thought, which I don't remember that ever coming through necessarily. What he thought he was doing originally before he became the Treize that we know.

Kat  02:56

Cathy, I did want to say that it felt like Treize was really reciting from your theory of anime from last episode when he talks about these "warriors with rebellious wings," and how their like purity of spirit completely changed his life.

Cathy  03:12

Yes, I love it. I felt like [laughter]--

Mallory  03:15

Yeah, I wrote, "Cathy! strong wills, what purity! theory of anime!" in my notes. So there you go. 

Caitlin  03:22

Now we have to address the possibility that Cathy is Treize. Treize was God, he was Hannibal, and now he's Cathy. 

Cathy  03:28

It does, I think, speak to why I've always found Treize a really fascinating character, even if I think he is a huge asshole, and none of his ideas make any sense. But you know, I am always drawn to this idea of people who, and I think I phrased it as "get sucked into other people's deranged orbits?" and Treize is both a person who creates a deranged orbit around himself [laughter] and also gets sucked into the orbit of the Gundam pilots, so I do love that about him.

Caitlin  03:56

Interesting. That explains a lot about you, but also makes me understand Treize a little bit better framing him that way.

Kat  04:03

I know you're sick of her but I did like that Une finally figured out the soul of OZ, that the purpose of battles isn't limited to making ideals into reality.

Mallory  04:11

Since you brought it up... why does Treize refer to her as like, my love? Or beloved? He says, "Lady Une, my love, rest in peace." So is the show trying to make me believe that Treize has feelings for Lady Une? 

Kat  04:26

Is it just awkward writing?

Caitlin  04:28

I think it's just awkward writing but also kind of that. I think the dub at least -- and I only listened to the dub this time -- decided that Treize was in love with her and is going with that.

Kat  04:39

Both of these episodes felt very much like, "Hey, remember this heterosexual pairing?"

Cathy  04:44

Yes! And I remember one time we talked about whether or not this show actually ships heterosexual pairings or just, they thought they were but they're just so horrible at writing heterosexual romances [laughter] that everything comes off really strange and this is definitely an example of that. Like, I could see both sides of this, that we are supposed to believe that Treize had romantic feelings for Lady Une and then it just was written so poorly because nobody on the show has met a real woman before. [laughter] Or, and I guess this would be my interpretation, it isn't that he is like romantically interested in her or was in love with her. But she was very important to him and represented, you know, one of the people that I think he wielded the biggest influences on and that touches him deeply. And her quote unquote, fate being that she is, quote unquote, dead at the end of Episode 26 weighs heavily on him.

Caitlin  05:40

But she's not dead. [laughing] Why does he say it? I know that in the episode, it's meant to be a fake out like, Oh, we know, we saw Lady Une die. And then Treize is talking to her as though she's dead so it's really not until the very end of episode 28 that we get the reveal that she's alive. It doesn't make a lot of sense.

Cathy  05:59

So let's address fake outs because there are characters talking in episodes 27 and 28, and I'm not sure if we are supposed to believe that they're talking at the time of the flashback footage being shown to us, or afterwards, right now, in the world of Episode 28.

Kat  06:16

I think Relena's was the only narration that actually seems like 100% anchored to what we were looking at. So... like Treize definitely we hear his earlier thoughts at the beginning and then he explains how they've changed, but with Heero it's just sort of like A, and then B. 

Mallory  06:34

Right, when Heero in Episode 27 says, "I don't consider the other Gundam pilots my comrades, I've never had comrades from the start," I have no idea if this narration is trying to tell me that Heero at this point in time currently, after Episode 26, does not believe the Gundam pilots are his friends. Or if he's referring to how he felt back then.

Caitlin  07:00

I under-understood that as definitely he's talking about that point in the flashback.

Cathy  07:05

It is kind of thrown out there. And it seems like by now he would have had so much interaction with these guys, especially at least with Trowa, that it would be kind of wild for him to say that [laughing]

Caitlin  07:18

He considers Trowa his comrade boyfriend, y'know? [cat meows in background]

Mallory  07:20

It was making me laugh because we've been reading this fic, this road trip arc. And it's kind of incredible how much this arc -- and we'll talk about this -- how much this arc and formed my idea of what the Gundam pilots' relationships were or like, their, their relationship dynamics or that they /had/ relationships with each other. So when I read all these fic, I was thinking like, "Wow, I didn't see any of this coordination in the show. Like there are no safe houses in the episodes that I watched. Oh, that like, it's okay, that must have come later." And now I'm later in the series, [laughing] and I'm finding out that actually, they interact very tangentially for the most part, where I was imagining a lot more camaraderie as the episodes progressed.

Kat  08:11

I know in Episode Zero, you were really distraught to learn that it's not like, "let's all five meet up and team up!" ... 

Mallory  08:19

Yeah!

Kat  08:19

...kind of anime

Mallory  08:21

I mean, I'm really enjoying where it's going now. And I enjoy the sort of bits of relationships that we're getting and the ways that their personalities bounce off each other. And that's what makes, that's what makes Gundam Wing such a rich field to mine for fic, because you get all of these like, glimpses of what these characters could be to each other, within the canon of the show. And it's really easy for writers like Sunhawk to kind of just like, take them and run.

Cathy  08:52

Yes, so let's talk about Road Trip by Sunhawk. Road Trip is part of a larger, 17 part series called the Road Trip Arc by its fans. We are going to be talking mostly about just the first installment -- which is actually barely shippy. Like there are hints of the relationship that will come to be especially the 1x2 part of it. And the rest of the series is very staunchly 1x2 with background 3x4, question mark with Wufei, which I'd really love to talk about later. But at least in the first part, it's kind of more of a, I don't know if action story is the right word...  You know, it starts at some unspecified time in the canon. Heero and Duo are escaping a mission that is kind of going south. They land on earth, on a beach. Heero is badly injured, Duo is you know, kind of beat up but is still mostly functional. You know, he's not internally bleeding and concussed, which is what Heero is. So he's forced to drive them to safety, and eventually to a rendezvous point where the idea is that Quatre and the others will pick them up. But when they get there OZ is basically hot on their heels. So Duo is able to leave Heero, basically in secluded cover, but he has to redirect OZ's attention, which gets him into more trouble. And he almost essentially drowns. So exhausted, pummeled within an inch of his life, he limps his way back to a safe house, again, unspecified location, or why he knows that that thing is there, but whatever, where all the rest of the pilots are staying at. So that's Quatre, Trowa, and Wufei. Heero's already in the hospital, you know, Duo basically passes out. He's given immediate medical attention, including drugs that cause him to lash out and nearly kill everybody around him. But finally, Heero, near death himself, manages to sneak out of his hotel--hospital room to sit by Duo's side, which calms Duo down and the fic ends with them having this really cute exchange about Duo's IVs.  So I did want to talk about the landscape of fanfic reading at this time, before we really dive deep into Road Trip itself. Do you guys have any memories, you know, or impressions of what it was like at the time when you first started reading Gundam Wing fanfic?

Caitlin  11:12

I remember that... I'm pretty sure I read this fic on a site that had either an all black background with white text; a sepia tinted background, that was like, you know, like a light, brownish, and then like a sort of off gray text. Because back in 2000, the only HTML any of us knew was how to change background color and how to change font color. You could put one image... They had gifs back then. And I don't, that's probably why my eyes are bad now. [laughter]

Kat  11:45

Yeah, it was either like very weirdly colored websites or really, really intensely over-styled websites, where it like, it's a little pop up and it's butterfly-shaped.

Mallory  11:58

Yeah. And there's like glitter and sparkles when you move your mouse and stuff. I didn't have fast like, I didn't get DSL until really late, like I was a senior in high school. So all of these websites just like crashed our internet constantly. [laughing] It was, it was hard for me to read those kinds of archives and stuff. 

Caitlin  12:22

The point here is that these fics were hosted on like, a bunch of different sites. And it was just small, privately run, I guess you could say archives, like it's like it's one person who wants to save all the Gundam Wing fic in the world. Which is actually why we have Road Trip preserved on AO3, Archive of Our Own, which is that it's part of the Open Doors Project where a archivist by the name of Dacia used to run a site called A Little Piece of Gundam Wing, she was really into Duo. She read pretty much every Duo pairing if I recall correctly, like she was really into like all Duo pairings and she started collecting fic from various places where like, she-she wanted to curate like the best fic in her mind. So she would like ask authors, "Oh, can I host this on my site too?" after finding the fic other places and so she collected a bunch of, a bunch of fic. And as probably a lot of us know, Archive of Our Own, which is run by the Organization for Transformative Works, has a program called Open Doors where they will import archives that are closing, fanfiction archives that are closing, or that the maintainers just don't want to maintain anymore. So they maintain, they import them wholesale from the original archive and put them on Archive of Our Own.

Kat  13:49

It's pretty great because there are tons of fic from that time period that I wish I could remember or find or go back and to be able to like even search stuff on AO3 that was on those is great.

Cathy  14:02

So we've talked about this before, but that's where Gundam Wing Addiction is actually pretty funny because they did rescue some of these sites. You know, we talked about the Izumi Fountain District with Alexe Cinz stuff last time, but they also rescued, I want to say it's Lev or Levwolf or something like that? 

Kat  14:23

Leviathan's Lair. 

Cathy  14:25

The-the Leviathan's Lair. There we go. 

Kat  14:26

Ooh, I remember this site. Wow--

Mallory  14:28

Yeah

Kat  14:28

Looking at this site is like getting slapped in the face. 

Cathy  14:31

Yeah, I definitely read a lot of fic on A Little Piece of Gundam Wing, which I remember had a lot of text that was like accent text in orange [laughter]. And one of my favorite authors. well, they were an author pair, TB and Marsh, they were hosted on A Little Piece of Gundam Wing, that's where I first discovered them. But same thing with Sunhawk, who wrote two really famous series you know, Road Trip is the first one -- and in my memory, the more famous one although I think some people might say it's the Ion Arc, which I really don't remember anymore. 

Kat  15:06

No, like reading Road Trip -- it's sort of like if I didn't read Road Trip, I read a bunch of fics like it, but the Ion Arc doesn't really ring a bell. 

Cathy  15:15

Ok, yeah. So it was also the one that was easiest to talk about because the first part of Ion isn't really meaty enough, I think to talk about whereas Road Trip, the first installment is almost perfectly self-encompassing of a lot of stuff. In terms of dates, you know, I cannot find a definitive date of when Sunhawk first wrote and posted Road Trip, the first archive I could find that was still crawled by Web Archive, thank you Web Archive, was from November 2001 on Steelsong, who was another moderator of a large network of websites, a lot of which were Gundam Wing websites and specifically had their own Gundam Wing fanfic archive. By the time that Steelsong had put Sunhawk on their site, which was some time around November 2001, Sunhawk had already written much of Road Trip, she had already written the first six installments, which is a lot of fic. And at that time, at least in 2001, 2002, Sunhawk was writing Road Trip concurrently with Ion.  My suspicion is that Sunhawk probably first wrote this on a mailing list, you know, the 1x2 mailing list was a really popular one at the time, and so maybe it was that she first started there and then later got into the archives. But this would mean that Sunhawk probably started writing Gundam Wing fic right after Gundam Wing's run on Toonami in 2000.  So another thing I did want to point out is that we are really lucky now that Gundam Wing is available on streaming on Hulu, that there's all these wiki sites that we could basically find all the information we would want. It's possible that Sunhawk did not actually have a way to fact check anything that she was writing at the time. And so you know, one thing I did want to talk about with the fic was this indeterminate canon timeline issue, I don't know when in the series, this was supposed to happen. You know, Deathscythe is called Deathscythe. Much later in the series, Wufei's Gundam is referred to as Altron, which is his second Gundam. But we don't ever get this kidnapping phase that happens in the fic. So I don't know. But then again, I realized when I was Sunawk in 2001, how was she supposed to have checked that? Right?

Kat  17:29

I think also, nobody gave a shit back then. [laughs] 

Mallory  17:32

Yeah. Like, it's also sort of like, did it really matter to your enjoyment? Like, you have all the elements of the Gundam Wing pilots and them interacting and the shipping, and like, it doesn't really matter what canon we're supposed to be in because we're already out of, outside of canon.

Kat  17:52

I feel like there were only like two timelines for fic and it was basically like pre-Endless Waltz and then post-Endless Waltz. I never really felt like, even though there's definitely a definitive plot split between, like, from all the episodes we've seen, and all the episodes we're about to see, I never really felt like fic did.

Caitlin  18:12

It's, it's sort of an interesting question in like Film Studies, where, you know, up until VHS, there was no way to really rewatch a movie that you were writing about. So a lot of film criticism and film theory was written by people who had only like, watched the movie once. So there's, it's kind of like a pathology we have nowadays that we can rewatch everything over and over again, so we can get this sort of like perfect timeline, this perfect like, sense of a film. Whereas in the past, like nobody ever watched anything like that. And there are, there are some film theorists nowadays who's still argue for that as like the true model of cinema, though obviously, that's much less prominent now. That, that gets into my whole idea of fanfic as a form of like interpretation, like fanfic is like a type of criticism of the original series. 

Kat  19:01

Yeah, absolutely. And the thing that people wanted more of in Gundam Wing was gay shit and safe houses. 

Mallory & Caitlin  19:08

Yeah. 

Caitlin  19:09

And it's and it's easy to just like put that in. Like reading Road Trip, I wasn't thinking too much about like, where does this fit in the timeline because who cares?

Cathy  19:16

This is a first person POV fic, which in my mind now is pretty rare for big fanfics to be first person POV. But you, Mallory, had noted how much this voice sounded like the dub Duo voice. 

Mallory  19:30

Yeah, she has gotten Duo's voice down. [laughs] I think it's just the slang that she kind of throws in there, the sort of casual way that Duo thinks and speaks feels very "of the show." Like I hear Scott McNeil's voice in my head [laughs] reading her fic is how good I think it is. Like there's like a cheesy earnestness in the dialogue of both the show and the fic that I think like works really well and is like really charming.

Caitlin  20:05

And I think that, so I think Duo's voice is very well established and it is at least, I only read the first two parts, but in the second part which is Heero's first person point of view, Duo's dialogue lines are also very strongly Scott McNeil-esque, I felt. I think Heero's voice is a little bit less distinct. One of my struggles with these fics was like, does this read as Heero to me? Like I really wasn't sure. And I'll say with regards to the first person point of view, maybe this gets us on to a different topic, but there are so many things about this fic where if I opened a fic like this now in 2020, I would hit I would hit the back button so hard. 

Cathy  20:48

No, I want to talk about this, this is a great topic. I love this. 

Caitlin  20:51

So I would never read something with this much violence. I'd always be like, what I don't want to read that, I don't want to read Duo getting beaten up or tortured, or whatever.

Mallory & Kat  21:00

Oh! [laughter]

Caitlin  21:02

I know! I like, I don't, I don't read that sort of fic these days. Like I don't read whump, the ancient genre of whump. [laughs]

Kat  21:10

Oh, whump I guess is like a ancient genre but an everlasting genre to me. 

Caitlin  21:15

Yes.

Kat  21:15

Cathy, when you were trying to classify this fic, I was thinking, "this is definitely whump, pre-slash."

Mallory & Caitlin & Cathy  21:21

Yes, yes. Yes. 

Mallory  21:22

At least part one is pre-slash.

Kat  21:24

Yeah

Caitlin  21:25

And I would never read something like that these days... Like if it was, it was tagged pre-slash, rated M, and I be like, "but how can it be rated M if they don't have sex?" I'd be like, "no, there's got to be some other reason for this to be rated M, I can't handle it. I need to go back." Like I would hit the back button so hard. And I'd be wrong because this fic is really good. 

Kat  21:47

It definitely feels from, from an older time~

Cathy  21:50

Yes, I agree. And I second everything Caitlin said. This fic was surprisingly readable and I know that sounds like a backhanded compliment but what I mean is, I didn't expect it to still sound as good and like something I would see someone write now, but it is. It's still really good, you know the voices are really good, the dialogue are really, is really good. But everything about it screams back button. Like I hated Quatre and Trowa even in this fic. [laughing]

Caitlin  22:19

Oh my god, oh my god [laughter]

Cathy  22:20

[laughter] Even though they do nothing, I hated them. Outside of Gundam Wing I did not ever read whump or hurt/comfort fic, you know, this was just not a genre that I was ever interested in. In Gundam Wing it was almost unavoidable? 

Kat  22:33

I was gonna say there's no way [crosstalk]

Cathy  22:34

because of the plot [crosstalk] So you kind of had to--

Kat

especially if you like Duo--

Cathy

Especially if you liked Duo! And then of course all of the little fandom tropes that kill me now about the fic might actually have not yet been as deeply entrenched in fanon at the time she was writing as they are now but--

Caitlin  22:51

True

Cathy  22:51

Certainly now when I read it, I'm like, well, there's the safe house.

Mallory  22:55

Yeah, it's like a checklist almost. Like oh, there's that mention of Duo's hair smelling like sandalwood,

Cathy  23:02

Yes!

Caitlin  23:02

Why sandalwood?

Mallory  23:03

It was always sandalwood and it was always Duo. Duo's hair always smelled like sandalwood..

Kat  23:08

I mean it might be this fic though, like this is  The the fic, the landscape of fic reading and stuff, there was just less of it and like the people who are into it are like really spending time to find it and stuff. We're talking about different archives, I read like everything on 1x2x1--

Mallory  23:10

Mmhmm

Kat  23:10

Uh wing-- Shinigami and Wing like and so I think it was like, fanon still coalesces pretty fast now but I think because there's less access to source material too it's like so much easier for it to grow like this, just sort of permeate the entire fandom, not just one pairing.

Mallory  23:48

Yeah, I mean like Kat you were saying earlier you may not have read this particular fic but you have definitely read 10 or 15 other ones that are very similar to it in terms of what you can expect from the action and the characters and the pairings.

Kat  24:04

Duo is gonna get hurt. Heero is gonna be angry over something that he doesn't need to be angry about. Trowa is gonna to be a calm head, Quatre's the kind heart. Wufei I like in this because he's like the friend, the bro, instead of the standoffish fifth guy. 

Mallory  24:19

Yeah, 

Kat  24:19

so that's nice--

Caitlin  24:20

Yeah. Wufei good in this but he has a better like,

Kat  24:25

Rapport?

Caitlin  24:25

He has more rapport with Duo than Heero does [laughter]  

Mallory  24:28

Yes. I was going to say--

Caitlin  24:31

I'm sure we were all in on this but I was side shipping Duo and Wufei a lot. Wufei gave him a bath!

Mallory & Kat  24:38

Wufei gets him! 

Cathy  24:40

Do you guys, can I spoil something about the rest of the Road Trip arc? 

Caitlin  24:43

Yes! 

Mallory & Kat  24:44

Yeah. 

Cathy  24:45

So I okay. And I will first give readers this warning, if you do want to read the rest of the installments of Road Trip, there are warnings on AO3 but I must add that there is a significant part of Duo's backstory that deals with rape and trauma and especially rape of Duo when he was very under age so--

Caitlin  25:10

This also something that would be auto back button for me.

Cathy  25:13

Yeah so I have to I have to put in that disclaimer because I don't want people wandering into the rest of the story. Road Trip the first installment is fine but the rest of the story this is, this is a big part of his character so please don't read it if it is triggering. But one thing about Wufei is you find out later he actually has a BIG honkin' crush on Duo and he is almost always--

Mallory 25:36

I must have read this.

Caitlin  25:37

Nooooo!

Cathy  25:37

 He is almost always there basically like helping like pick Duo up and like--

Caitlin  25:43

no [crosstalk] this is too sad!

Cathy  25:43

Supplements this like emotional stuff that like Heero doesn't get because Heero has a bad problem 

Caitlin  25:49

[agonized] Noooo--

Cathy  25:49

in Road Trip of like treating Duo as like too fragile which pisses Duo off  

Kat  

That was a common dynamic. 

Cathy

He comes to this like realization that he's like really in love with Duo but then he has to shelve it because he realizes that Duo and Heero are soulmates? And so he like, he says he'll be a friend forever and he gives like do this plush dragon. And then the whole thing is it's set up to be eventually a Wufei and Sally Po story? But the very last installment -- that is part 16 of the 16 part series -- is essentially a story where Duo has an anxiety freak out while Heero's away. He calls Wufei over to his apartment, they spend a night together completely platonically. Duo realizes that Wufei is like eaten up inside by something that Wufei won't tell Duo about. And it's like this crush, which all of us know because we all read the part with the Wufei point of view, but like Duo didn't get the memo. 

Mallory

Oh my god?

Kat

I picked up on this and I only read one chapter.

Caitlin

I can't handle this.

Cathy

So he's not sure what's happening. And that at the very end, you know, Wu Fei is like basically telling Duo that he doesn't want to start dating Sally Po because he's afraid of like, basically something that like, and he phrases it in a way that makes Duo think he's talking about his former dead wife, but it's actually about Duo. [crosstalk: No!] And Duo says to him, you have to let the past go. And so then Wufei does and call Sally up for a date. 

Kat

Okay, that plush dragon thing just lit up eight synapses.

Caitlin

I hate this.

Kat

I have read this fic, 100%.

Caitlin  25:57

It's possible that this is why I got into 2x5.

Cathy  27:32

So I just had to add this here because like, I truly felt the same way. Like I shipped Wufei and Duo was so hard and the more Heero like became this like, super protective like... I like this story, but I don't buy it as Heero characterization. Like I don't think Heero was very convincing. But I do find Duo and Wufei very convincing in the series. [laughs]

Caitlin  27:51

Yeaaah.

Kat  27:51

I think this is a big problem with a lot of Heero fanon characterization at the time, though, because like the logical conclusion of the fanon characterization of Heero is just a huge asshole nobody wants to date. [laughs] When the Toonami series aired, it was like a ton of 1x2. That was it. It was like 1x2, 3x4 blah, blah but I think as fanon crystallized like pairing diversity also increased.

Caitlin  28:17

Yeah, the thing is that I'm fine reading fanfic between assholes that nobody would want to date. That is, tends to be the type of fanfic that I read anyway. 

Kat  28:27

Look, I get that.

Caitlin  28:27

So Heero being terrible is fine. The problem is that this fic characterizes him as less terrible than he seems to actually be?

Mallory  28:36

Mmm.

Caitlin  28:36

Like, I don't think Heero is this, I don't think he's this protective. I don't think he's this in tune with his feelings. Part Two, really, like, as some of you might know, I never read established relationship fic, so I wasn't going to continue past Part Two anyway. Even though they have a lot of problems, I'm just like, all right, they already confessed their feelings. I'm not interested anymore. But I just found it really hard to believe that Heero would be able to confess his feelings or even like, recognize love, emotions, or romance that early on. 

Kat  29:10

It's the combined problem of he's an asshole who no one would want a date and the fic is still trying to convince me that him and Duo are like really great together in general. So I wrote a lot of Gundam Wing fic in middle school, so I consumed so much of it on [laughing] fanfiction.net and the characterization ended up getting really, really far removed even further removed than this fic from the actual show, I guess.

Cathy  29:35

So one thing I did want to point out, it's less obvious in Part One, but becomes increasingly obvious as you move through this arc is the total lack or mention of Relena Peacecraft. And, and I mean it, she is not mentioned once in this entire fic, which is odd because it goes from middle of the canon through until the post-Endless Waltz and then [laughter] seven to eight years, and seven to eight years after--

Mallory  30:05

Wow 

Cathy  30:05

the end of Endless Waltz, which, and again at by the end of this fic series, spoilers, Duo, Wufei, and Heero all work for the Preventers. So it seems very [laughter] weird that none of them would interact with Relena. So like I did--

Caitlin  30:14

It seems like they would run into Relena sometime [laughter]. 

Cathy  30:21

I did want to open the floor to talk about Relena Peacecraft and her place in Gundam Wing fanfic.

Kat  30:29

Well, so either you're a het shipper so you're, you're, you're doing fine, your Heero is probably very different. [laughter]

Caitlin  30:41

Wait, let's let's be clear that there were a lot of het shippers

Kat  30:44

Yes.

Caitlin  30:44

And they still are there. There was a lot of het shipping in the Japanese fandom too. I think Heero and Relena were popular. 

Kat  30:51

Duo and Hilde. 

Caitlin  30:53

And the official media that came out was like, oh Duo and Hilde. And, oh Heero and Relena.

Cathy  30:58

Yeah.

Kat  30:59

Relena and fanfiction so you're a het -- you could be a het shipper, so then she's in it a lot. 

Mallory

Or you hate her and she's a monster and she's the the thing standing between Heero and Duo falling in love or being together, which I feel like I read a lot of.

Kat  31:15

She could be shipping them but that was way more rare I thought and then like just not having her around.

Caitlin  31:22

So like, from the perspective of the contemporary moment, it looks bad to just not write Relena at all in your 300,000 word fic about characters who talk to Relena all the time. Like it seems bad 

Kat  31:38

But! 

Caitlin  31:39

but she was so controversial that I could see like I can see the logic of just not including her.

Kat  31:45

And as a reader I, I often preferred that she just kind of not be there be like very peripheral over... like I think at the beginning I really enjoyed the like Relena hating because there's just very viscerally satisfying, but later on, I was like, hmmm.

Caitlin  32:01

The other option is like, write a explainer about why your Heero in your fic doesn't love Relena, he only loves Duo. It just becomes, like, tedious to write that every single fic.

Cathy  32:15

One thing that I was digging up was a lot of Relena hate sites. And one thing we had talked about in past episodes was kind of like hating her because she was this rich girl, she had this entourage, we couldn't really relate to her. And there was a lot of that in why people expressed why they hated Relena. Like she was spoiled. She had everything. She was obsessed with Heero and so she definitely like wanted him as one of her belongings kind of thing? So I think it is one of those moments where now that I've read a lot more other types of Gundam Wing fanfic that I wasn't reading at that time that have, I think, much more interesting Relena characterization, and much more I think realistic ideas about what Heero and Relena's relationship would be like. I think, "God I was so stupid!" but I feel that same way about like everything I was into, right? [laughs] So like, it is kind of humbling and also funny. 

Mallory  33:14

Like reading this fic it's about as comforting as like finding your favorite High School sweater, you know, in the back of your closet when you're visiting home and putting it on and finding out it still fits. And it's because it sort of hits all of those familiar tropes that I remember reading, like the use of "Gods" is like--

Kat  33:32

Yes!

Mallory  33:33

punch in the face.

Caitlin  33:34

Why does everyone say gods? 

Mallory  33:36

Yes. 

Cathy

Everybody!

Mallory  33:37

Okay, and I don't remember, like I remember this being a thing in Gundam Wing fic I don't remember why--

Caitlin  33:43

[crosstalk] Duo was American and was raised in a—

Cathay

[laughing] Catholic!

Caitlin

Catholic. Why would he say Gods?

Kat  33:48

[crosstalk] Yeah Duo would never.

Cathy  33:49

I kind of get maybe the idea of why others would do it if this became like a post colony thing but certainly not Duo.

Kat  33:57

In like middle school. I was always wondering like, "oh, what kind of weird event happened in the future that made everybody until like a polytheist?" [laughter] Like, what kind of world building is this?

Mallory  34:07

Yeah, I thought that there had to be like a reason or is there a rule?

Caitlin  34:12

I kind of thought that just like the people writing fanfic at the time tended to be like pagans. Like, like, that was fine. And they and they were pushing their pagan agenda by having everybody say gods. 

Cathy  34:22

No, I, I, 100. That's 100% my theory.

Caitlin  34:25

that's what I think it is. 

Cathy  34:26

So I mean, Sunhawk was one of the older writers at the time, but I think a lot of the people who were archivists and writers at the time were older, she was probably at least I want to say in her 30s. They're usually older, some of them are Wiccan or pagan and a lot of them were very interested in like education and sort of like bringing up the younger members of the fandom. So Sunhawk specifically, like had a personality who was like very educational? I'm not saying that that's why she did particularly this "Gods" thing, but I do think that that was like part of the general dismantling of monotheistic-- 

Mallory 35:01

Christian god. 

Cathy  35:02

Yeah. So the last thing I want to talk about in terms of this fanfic is all the five pilots working together, coordinating pickup and rescue missions. 

Mallory  35:11

Rendezvous points? How are they in contact with each other? 

Cathy  35:15

And they all appear to have like similar missions? Like, it seems like Heero and Duo were on this mission together instead of what we see in the show, which is that they don't...? Again, I think I just love this idealistic view of the Gundam pilots where they're all not just friends, but also comrades in arms.

Caitlin  35:33

Yeah, I mean, this makes more sense than what the show does, which is that on the show, it's always, oh, they just happen to run into each other on the same mission. And they're like, oh, who are you? Why do you have the same Gundam as me? [laughter]

Mallory  35:47

We shouldn't be fighting. 

Caitlin  35:48

But Quatre's the only one who says that everybody else is like, let's blow each other up.

Cathy  35:53

We joke a lot about how this podcast is basically us questioning the internal logic of Gundam Wing, like why would anybody do this thing where they just sent five teenagers without any knowledge that there are four other of them and just be like, here you go.

Mallory  36:07

Complete a vague unspecified mission.

Kat  36:10

I feel like fanfiction really made them way more competent. Like there's literally that whole scene where the doctors are like, "You guys fucking suck. You're not the perfect soldiers at all." [laughter] 

Mallory 36:21

"You don't know anything." 

Kat  36:22

And then in fics it's like Heero's like, "I'm the perfect soldier. I know everything! 

Mallory  36:28

"I must be the perfect soldier." 

Caitlin  36:30

Oh, yeah. Like they all seem to be much better fighters than they are in canon. 

Kat  36:36

Yeah

Caitlin  36:36

I feel like in canon Wufei is the only one who does his job. And in fanfic, it seemed like they were all doing jobs.

Kat  36:43

Trowa's maybe just doing his own thing. 

Mallory  36:46

But he's doing A Job.

Caitlin  36:47

Yeah, clowning. Trowa's job is clowning! 

Kat  36:50

Everybody got way more trauma than Quatre did in fic even though the show is like here's Quatre's biggest trauma. 

Mallory  36:58

You know, that's very true. 

Kat  36:59

Which didn't even show up in the clip show.

Caitlin  37:02

Yeah, it also doesn't really make sense that Quatre's always this really sane one in fanfic when he's the main one we've seen in canon go apeshit. 

Kat  37:12

Reading this fic and then watching the clip show, I was like, damn, like Wufei/Treize/Zechs was like it's, a whole ass universe. And it's just like, one scene in the first 27 episodes. [laughter] But what a scene. 

Mallory  37:27

Such a good one.

Caitlin  37:29

I think that it's important to note that Sunhawk passed away last year, and so we could consider this episode our very weird tribute to her.

Cathy  37:37

Yes, in 2019 in March, there was a post on Sunhawk's LiveJournal, by her daughter, who had become in Sunhawk's words, essentially somewhat of a fandom secretary for Sunhawk, noting that if you are reading this entry, now, it means that she had passed away, she had been diagnosed with cancer, like in 2015, she said four and a half years ago from the time of the writing of the entry. So Sunhawk, beginning in 2007, did a tradition where every year for the 12 days leading up to Christmas, she would post the ficlet, or fanart inspired by her fics, usually 1x2 related usually an excerpt from or like a special scene or bonus scene from one of her stories about Duo and Heero. And she continued that tradition even up until 2019. 

Kat  38:25

Oh wow

Cathy  38:25

So prior to that she had actually queued up 12 Days of Christmas for 2019, which her daughter posted. And the very last story actually was a coda for the Ion arc, which was left unfinished and her daughter finished it for her. And if you had the chance, and of course, we'll link to this, I really highly recommend you read the goodbye post from Sunhawk.

Caitlin  38:49

It's, wait, it's really good. Can I read just a little bit of this? 

Cathy  38:51

Yes, please. 

Caitlin  38:52

Before I shuffle on off, though, I would be remiss if I didn't address the fandom that I have called home for almost two decades. To everyone, thank you, I realized that we aren't as large as we used to be that the heyday is over. But I've enjoyed being here and writing for you all. And there is one thing that I've learned through all of my years, and all of my time with the fandom that I want to share that I think applies not just to our little corner of the internet, but all fandom. Write it, draw it, sing it, create it, share it. We all start somewhere. We all start with works that are horribly out of character. We write tropes that have been written up million times before. We all stare at blank canvases unable to get the lines down in a way that we want. And we all scrap ideas that we feel just aren't good enough. But a fandom lives because of the people who produce for it. And by those who come to read and view. Yes, maybe that 500 word drabble in which two strapping young men are trapped in a remote cabin during some horrible weather event and there is only one bed, isn't your best work. But what about the work after that, or the one that follows? With each creation you learn, you polish yourself, you grow. Never stop yourself from growing. Never let others stop you from growing. Share the stories you have in you. Post your heart -- Post your art, because at the end of the day life is too damn short to spend not doing something you love to do. To all of the Gundam Wing fandom and all of my friends, I want to again say thank you, reading my work supporting me talking with me, you've made my stay here a pleasant one.

Cathy  40:21

I find it really heartwarming. And one thing that I did for this episode is I went back and I read some of Sunhawk's first LiveJournal posts in 2002, when she started her LiveJournal, and even in the comments to people who were, I don't think close friends of hers, you know, just fans, she was always extremely, you know, encouraging and welcoming, and always told her fans that they should just write, you know, even if they felt like whatever they did wasn't perfect or wasn't in their words going to match up to what she did. She always told them just write it. Coming to Sunhawk and realizing that she'd spent two decades in a fandom that I think a lot of us considered dead and she was still cranking out work there and like encouraging people and being loving in that fandom, it just is it's like everything that one hopes one span that experience will be like and how they'll be remembered when they leave. Well, I want to thank you guys for joining me on this episode where we talk about, you know, Sunhawk and fanfic and being really young and on the internet with dial up. I really, you know, appreciate all of your memories, which are also my memories. And together, we'll keep Sunhawk's spirit alive. Write it, draw it, sing it, create it and share it. Thank you very much and see you in two weeks.

[ramblingguy54]

How do you feel about the sudden shift in pacing in SUF? Personally, I was so disconcerted at first, I thought that it was /worse/ than the original series, then I rewatched, and realized that it was just really different. It's definitely a lot more blunt in the humor, and of course there's the whole Steven-not-knowing-everything-anymore-thing. What do you think?

The overall pacing of Steven Universe Future has been very enjoyable!

I genuinely find it to be pretty damn good actually, as its focus is crystal clear on where it should be. That being Steven Universe’s inner dilemma of what he’s supposed to do now the whole massive conflict with the Diamonds has been solved. As much as I loved Steven Universe’s story when it focused on the main conflict surrounding the Crystal Gems against their own planet and learning more about each of them, along with Rose’s entire backstory too, it still suffered from some of the Beach City episodes dragging it down in the pacing when it could’ve focused more on the other characters, like further exploring Lapis and Peridot’s chemistry for example. That isn’t to say I hated every single one, as some were actually enjoyable and gave me an appreciation for them in a sense. Sometimes it’s okay to take a breather and have a simple slice of life episode. Fun fact, I didn’t get into watching the OG series, until the movie was released last year, so that gave me more of a tolerance for the Beach City episodes. Makes me very glad that I waited this long because hoo boi some of the hiatus issues I’ve heard about from a close friend of mine, who got into watching this series when it first aired back then, weren’t pretty. LMAO!

Anyways, the idea surrounding Steven’s characterization of not-knowing-everything-anymore-thing, as you’ve put it, isn’t actually as weird, from I’ve heard some people make it out to be for a form of criticism that people on Tumblr have made rebuttals against before. It’s wonderfully consistent with what Steven’s character is all about and that’s trying to figure out his place in the world. This has always been a consistent struggle for himself, like the lyric mentioned in the full version of the series opening from Steven.

“I will fight to be everything that everybody wants me to be when I’m grown!”

Steven’s whole internal conflict surrounds not knowing whether or not he can exactly be like his mother, which puts a shit ton of insecurities on his own self-worth into trying to fit in with the other Crystal Gems because he’s not your average-every-day-kid that you see in society. He’s a special hybrid of human/gem that neither side of the species connected to him has ever seen before and that puts a ton of pressure onto how the boy feels a need to connect with both sides of himself. While he already has a deeply loving relationship with his father, Greg, Steven also wants to better understand that Gem lineage and why his mother was so revered by what he perceives to be these amazing warriors, who fight evil. Never mind putting this onto a kid’s existence, as soon as he or she’s brought into reality, but even an adult would struggle a lot with all this stuff. As the original story progressed, Steven learns all of the hardships the Crystal Gems faced many centuries ago and what his own mother did to protect the Earth in exchange for many issues Steven would have to handle, as soon as Pink Diamond gave up herself to create the child.

Holy shit, did he ever have to handle the baggage from Pink Diamond.

You should’ve shattered me back then. At least if I were in pieces, I wouldn’t have to know how little I mattered to you. You didn’t even tell em. You bubbled me away and didn’t ever tell your friends! MY friends!

I’m going to tell them. I’m gonna tell them everything.

Then you really are better than HER…

Pivotal moments, like in the episode centered around Bismuth, paint everything in an entirely different light for Steve’s ideals based around his mother. At first, Rose Quartz was implied to be an individual who could do no wrong to any living thing, but hindsight from Bismuth’s trauma paints everything in an entirely different light for this poor boy having to take on the entire blunt of this figurative dagger. A question that is represented in the episode, Storm In The Room.

Did you make me, just so you wouldn’t have to deal with all your mistakes!?

Is that all I’m here for…?

I’ve went into more detail about this episode in a previous ask surrounding this topic, so you can check that one out in your free time, but the point I’m making here is Steven has centered a lot of himself around the idea of Rose Quartz being a self-less individual and helped many others through her actions that put this entire series into motion in the first place, but when all of that from this kid’s perspective is thrown out the window through tragic events that also happened in part because of her decisions, Steven starts questioning everything about his life. I’d like think in these moments Steven’s internal dialogue is worded around these types of statements.

“I wanted to be a savior, like her. Although, she did bad things, too! Am I no different from her? Can I truly help people without hurting them in the process?”

That’s why he helped the Crystal Gems in The Test Season 1 episode feel better about their own issues, while hiding how hurt the boy felt about being lied to about the obstacle course being 100% percent un-failable because Steven adopted the selfless image of his mother in this important moment. Steven listened in on a private conversation he had no business hearing from Garnet, Amethyst, and Pearl that fueled this idea further of becoming a savior to all living things and put into perspective that these “amazing warriors” were in fact very insecure like himself and needed Steven in their lives, just as much as he did.

That’s why he helped heal Lapis before.

That’s why he helped Peridot open her eyes and come outta her shell.

I could go on and on, but in a nutshell Steven has made life revolve around others so much that feels only natural to help anyone he can, considering that’s what his mother believed in. Even if they’re morally questionable individuals, Steven still tries to see the good in everyone. His angry statements against Lars attitude about Rose put all of that into perspective to contemplate about.

What do you know about my mom!? I didn’t even get to know my mom, but I do know she saw beauty in everything! Even in stuff like this and even in jerks like you!

Steven’s only known what to do because he’s adopted the ideals of his mother so much. Kind of like being brought into existence like your typical Gems, where they’re programmed to feel that way and commit the actions they’re all built for. It’s poetic honestly that he’s helped everyone, but not himself in the long run. These issues were piling on since the start because Steven didn’t have to worry about feeling inferior because he could always help everyone in this series, but now that the events of Steven Universe Future have occurred this puts everything into a more deeply poignant light for the kid entering a more mature phase of his life now and is going to reflect on every little aspect of himself.

There’s no such thing as happily ever after. I’ll always have more work to do.

But if there’s nothing to work out…

Steven Universe Future is a brilliant character study pay off to all those five seasons that were paving the way to this cementing the idea that Steven has issues that are spiraling outta control from putting all of independence into the idea that he has to be a savior like his mother was. Much like how Spinel was so attached to Pink Diamond as a “best friend”, Steven puts so much faith into the mindset that he has must stick his guns and stay that perfect savior everyone knows/loves. It’s unhealthy emotional attachment that is coming to light with these Pink outbursts of his. While he still loves what his mother stood for, despite feeling very conflicted about her in general these days, still strives to be the best parts of her and not the worst, hence the ending of the Rose Buds episode where he puts the painting of her pure persona into Lion’s mane realm.

It’s entirely reversed roles now where the Crystal Gems and mostly everyone are fine, but Steven is far from being emotionally stable currently in recent events. Steven Universe The Movie built the subversive punchline that this epilogue series has been delivering strongly on so far and hope it will continue to do so. I’ve loved how they’ve deconstructed Steven’s characterization.

To end this lengthy post, I’ll refer to these words from Jasper that sums up everything on Steven’s issues. She may have been seriously harsh, but Jasper aint wrong in some ways about Steven feeling very low on himself in general.

You think everyone needs help, but its only you! No one is as pitiful as you!

On a side note, regarding the humor real quick in Future, I can see why you’d think its more blunt. It’s very on the nose with how much it pokes fun at itself, but honestly I don’t have issues with it all. I don’t know about you, but I find it fucking hilarious how they’ve been openly taking potshots at their previous ideas in the story line. I’m always down for a creative team being snarky with themselves!

Thanks for taking the time to read this detailed post of mine! =)

[colesartandbooksandstuff]

My Auto-Buy Authors

I wanted to make a quick short post about authors that I will automatically buy any books that they publish. I had seen this a little bit around bookstagram and thought I’d give it a shot. 

1- Leigh Bardugo: If King of Scars is as good or better than Six of Crows/Shadow and Bone, there is a very good shot that she will be my favorite author. I have given every of her books 5 stars (the only other two authors with that achievement being Angie Thomas and Holly Black). I am currently finishing Ruin and Rising, and King of Scars is a few down on my TBR. Six of Crows and Crooked Kingdom are #4 and #3 of my favorite books of all time. (Desperately holding out for both Six of Crows 3 and Alex Stern 2) *I have rewatched the character trailer for Shadow and Bone on Netflix far too many times- I need that show NOW!

2- Karen M. McManus: My second favorite movie is The Breakfast Club, so when I saw One of Us is Lying for sale, it really could have been hit or miss. I finished it in 2 (very late) nights. Since then I’ve gotten each of her books as soon as I could, and absolutely can not wait until she interprets Ferris Bueler’s Day Off next fall. *Also One of Us is Lying is going to air on Peacock and I will be first in line to stream it. 

3- Becky Albertalli: Simon vs was one of the first books that got me back into reading, with Leah on The Offbeat really drawing me back in. What if Its Us broke my heart and made me want a start dating. Yes, No, Maybe so got me thrown into politics more so than I already was. I love all of her books (I haven’t read Upside yet, but after that I’ll be caught up). She seems like such a genuine author and that trait is found in her characters. We need more books with queer characters and happy endings and for that reason I will always support her. 

4- Angie Thomas: I was LATE to the game on The Hate U Give. When I say late, I mean that I didn’t read it until this summer (I know- it was always checked out of the library and hardcovers are expensive). I picked it and On the Come Up off of book outlet and oh my god was I kicking myself for waiting so long. I will be reading Concrete Rose as soon as I get the chance; straight to the top of the TBR. I would love to see her write a romance with Becky or Adam Silvera, since theyre friends in real life. Similar to Becky, we need more diverse stories and the best way to increase the number of them is to prove to publishers that readers need them too.

5- Cassandra Clare: The Shadowhunter Chronicles is my favorite series. I’ve read them all, including the short stories and spin off series. I know that some people don’t like that there are so many books, but I do. I miss the OG crew (Clary, Izzy, Simon, Jace, and Alec) but the new characters are nice too. That being said, I can’t wait for Sword Catcher to come out and hope that it is even better than TSC.

*Honorable Mentions:

-Sarah J Maas: I’ve only read Crescent City (loved it) and Catwoman, but all 4 ACOTAR books are on my night stand. I’m have 4.5 books to finish before then (I KNOW I KNOW I KNOW), but then I’ll finally start. Once I finish those I’ll get to Throne of Glass (which I do want to read, but to be honest, it likely won’t be until the middle/late summer that I get to start). I’ve heard good things and liked what I read, so I’m sure that once I read some more, its a safe bet that she’ll be one of my auto-buys

-Adam Silvera: I have read all of Adam’s books except for History is all you left me (on my night stand) and More Happy Than Not. I loved What If It’s Us, liked TBDaTE, wasn’t in love with Infinity Son, but I want to give it another shot. Odds are, if he publishes something, I’ll pick it up. I know that it will have diverse characters, but I don’t know if I’ll love it.

-Casey McQuiston: Red, White, and Royal Blue is my second favorite book of all time. It is the reason that I am taking a poli-sci minor and that in turn lead to me wanting to go to law school. It made me want to write my own queer love story (in progress- barely). However, she has only released one book. I will be picking up her sophomore novel (One Last Stop- 6/1/20) as soon as I can get my hands on it, but I can’t say that I’ll pick up everything without her repeatedly releasing books I love. 

*Queer Books: I’m bi, and I worked at a bookstore for over a year. I own most of the queer books that we sold, 1) because I want books I can relate to, and 2) because I feel obligated to support those authors and those stories. That is where I end up with books like “We Contain Multitudes” and “Call Me by Your Name” on my shelves. I hated WCM. I think that it was damaging to the community, it glamorized statutory rape and abuse, it was low quality writing, (my whole review is on my blog). I got rid of it after I read it. I will likely buy a book because it has a queer storyline, but that doesn’t mean that I will keep it. I have a bunch of queer books on my tbr and my shelves that I havent gotten to, but i’ll type them out for recs: Only Mostly Devastated, Fell of Dark, Stay Gold, Late to the Party, Damaged like Us. These are all books that I haven’t gotten around to reviewing, but hopefully will eventually

[0n-y0ur-left]

I ALSO THINK IT WASN'T UNTIL ROME THAT CROWLEY FELL IN LOVE!!!! Originally, I was totally on board with the idea that it was right away, that conversation in Eden. But I just rewatched that episode and I completely agree! Crowley was intrigued by Az from then on, but it wasn't until Az 'tempted' him in Rome that I think he really gave in. What are your thoughts on Aziraphale's side of things?? I kind of think it wasn't until WWII and Crowley saving the books that he actually fell in love.

I had the longest fucking response post to this complete with gifs and screenshots and then accidentally hit “back” on my browser and almost fucking threw my laptop out the window this morning, so... this will not be as good as it could have been

BUT OKAY LET’S TALK ABOUT THIS PROGRESSION FROM CROWLEY’S SIDE SHALL WE??? (cut for the sake of your dash)

So here’s the thing - I think, in the garden, that was where the seed of ineffability was planted, if you will - that was when Crowley first became interested/intrigued.  Because he slithers away from his hidey hole, having just pulled off the first human Temptation TM in history, and it’s given him the confidence to approach the Principality at the gate, even though he’s seen the fact that they have a smiting sword (he’s about to become the most successful demon in Hell, what is the angel going to do, really?)  So Crawley approaches the angel, and starts his usual shtick, that which got him thrown out of Heaven in the first place - he questions God.  And the angel, well... they hem and haw but there’s obviously a little seed of doubt there; maybe something that he can dig into deeper.  But before the serpent can take hold of any of that, he notices that the sword isn’t there, and comes to find out that not only did the angel not lose it - he gave the damned thing away.

Because he felt compassion for the humans.  So... whether he wants to admit it or not, this angel - one who was entrusted to guard The Garden, one who was given one of Their greatest weapons, one who was meant to thwart Crawly in the first place... well, he has to be thinking like the demon, at least a little bit.  In his own way.  And then to top it all off, when the first rain starts to fall, what does he do?

He shields the demon with his wing.  Which... okay, you could attribute to Heavenly kindness, but - as the rest of the series goes on to very clearly show, the angels aren’t nice.  

So yeah - the demon can’t help but be interested.

He seeks the angel out 1000 years later in Mesopotamia, only to find that God is still up to her same Bullshit, killing off all humans (and isn’t it interesting that it’s the demon worrying about the children?)... Crawly questions like he usually does, only this time the angel stays in hard line with the Great Plan.  

It’s disappointing.  Then the rain starts and the Earth is wiped bare again and the demon doesn’t bother with the angel for another 3000 years.  And this time they stand by and watch the man who’s the supposed son of God be publicly executed, and again the angel washes his hands of it.  By this point the demon has changed his name, is changing his identity, shedding that skin of the demon and turning more into Crowley - whatever the hell they are supposed to be.  But the angel sticks to the status quo, and they both stand there watching the crucifixion.

I think if you ended things there, Crowley just goes on doing his work and minding his own business.  But then, within the same decade, the run into each other again, and this time it’s the angel who finds him.

 The angel, who now apparently drinks alcohol and eats food, even if its not meant for their celestial bodies.  The angel who raves over oysters, then tempts the demon with them.  And of course, he blunders his way through that bit and walks it all back when he realizes what he’s said, but the little considering smirk that Crowley gives him (before absolutely going along for their first lunch together)??

As far as I’m concerned, that’s the moment that the demon said “fuck it, this is a thing that’s happening now” and just sort of... fell again, for the angel who was about as bad of an angel as Crowley knew himself to be a demon.  And that’s why he continues to seek Aziraphale out, apparently with more increasing frequency as the centuries go on, even coming up with The Arrangement to both get the two of them out of work and to spend more time with the angel.

I could do the same from Aziraphale’s side (and probably will later) - I think his spark moment, if you will, came in Paris; he’d already seen that Crowley could do good if given the proper motivation, but here he is putting himself out for the sole purpose of saving Aziraphale.  And then, of course, the “Oh fuck I love him” moment came in the church during the Blitz.

And then that also makes the whole “You go too fast for me line” that much more painful - Aziraphale has been in love for 20 years; barely he blink of an eye for the two of them, and he can hardly just go off with the demon now - whereas for poor Crowley it’s been over 2000 bloody years, how slow can a Celestial go?

[dlamp-dictator]

Allen’s Rambling: A Combat School Anime About Combat (Absolute Duo)

Every year I go out of my way to rewatch three anime. 

The first is Kenichi: The Mightiest Disciple, a martial arts comedy anime that I’ve always found enjoyment out of since I first watched it quite a few years ago back in the early 2010s. I never watch this to completion anymore given it’s over 40 episodes, but watching about 5 or 8 episodes helps me remember what I love about this genre. The wacky fights, the likable characters, the plot progression, all good stuff that I can recommend to anyone.

The second is Master of Martial Hearts, another martial arts anime that is so legendarily bad that it’s almost a required viewing for any anime fan. I watch this as a sort of palette cleanser to just remind myself of what a truly bad anime is like when I feel like raving and complaining about how uncreative the Isekai genre is. All I have to look back at this anime and then ask myself: “Is there an anime as bad as Master of Martial Hearts in the year 2019?” If the answer is no (when the answer is no), I know that we still live in a world where anime is pretty okay. 

And the last thing I watch every year is Absolute Duo, an anime that is honestly pretty average in the grand scheme of things, but is such a fun and comfortable watch that I can’t help but enjoy it every year. I decided to watch my yearly three shows a little out of order this time and... well, I just want to talk a little about this show for a bit.

And let’s start this as I usually do, with the premise.

Absolute Duo focuses on a Tor Kokonoe, a young man who becomes a student at Kouryou Academy, a military school that trains students called Exceeds who wield spiritual/soul weapons known as Blazes. Tor is an Irregular, a title given to him due to his Blaze manifesting as a shield instead of a melee weapon like everyone else. With his Duo partner Julie Sigtuna they train and fight off several threats to reach Absolue Duo, the final frontier of an Exceed’s power.

That’s the basic premise, pretty standard for a Combat School anime. However, I like how serious the show takes that premise. Or at least how much the show recognizes that this is, in fact, a military school. It’s not so much that I like the show, but that I like all the little bits of world-building that go into it. Classes focus on tactics and combat, a character’s strength and ability are the main way to keep their grade. Students that don’t get stronger are expelled after their first year, and so on. It’s simple stuff, but with how little teeth most anime of this archetype show, this was a breath of fresh air.  

The first episode is what honestly hooked me. Tor meets up with a girl named Imari, they hit things off pretty well, there’s even a hint of romance. As the scene goes on and the two reach the entrance ceremony you’d think she’d be the main lead and that they’d be paired up for the rest of the series.

But then in the entrance ceremony turns out to be a duel to the finish, with the two new friends having to fight it out in order to remain at school.

This... caught me off guard. Heck, this caught everyone in the cast off guard. People were confused at first, but the headmaster made it clear that getting into the school was the easy part, earning the right to remain was the next step. When Tor questioned the headmaster about this strange rite of passage she simply responses by saying they’ll have to fight both in class and after graduation, that they were given powers to use and so they need to prove why they want to keep them. In short, to repeat what I had said  a few years ago:

It was... a surprise when I first watched this, it’s still a surprise to this day so many years later. The stakes were set in such a surprisingly cold way that it kept me interesting. It was then I knew I was watching something just a little different.

And the show picks up from there. New challenges are met, new allies and enemies are made, and so on. If that first episode got you interested then it was likely you’d stick around for at least another two or three.

I already give a spiel about this anime two years ago and while I don’t like that post as much any more my thoughts remain the same for the most part. And I don’t feel like giving a play-by-play of all the bits I personally enjoyed, but I’ll at least go over all the little world-building parts and overall moments that impressed me:

The fact that Blazes are created via nanomachines and injectionss was surprisingly dark for such an overall lighthearted show. It really give it a bit more edge than I expected.

Seeing Imari come back in the second half of the show was a huge surprise, and a pleasant on at that since she left a really good impression on me. Something else I like was that although she did have romantic feelings for Tor she knew their chance meeting was just chance that she needed to step down and let someone with a better shot at him take it. It really spoke to her maturity and got me even more invested in her character... even if at that point she was just a side character.

The fact that there was (technically) one romantic interest that had a shot at Tor and that she confessed to him was not only a surprise, but welcomed. However, due to shenanigans that happened after the confession I’ll just say that it lost it’s impact pretty quickly.

The overall narrative theme of figuring out what lengths one will go to obtain power was compelling. I just wish they went a little deeper with it, especially for Tor and Julie who had more selfish reasons for wanting to become Blazes. Like I said, you get these powers via injections, so it could had gone to some interesting places if they focused on it more.

Tsukimi was a very interesting villain, a cosplaying teacher with a surprisingly vicious side she only revealed to those that survived her initial snap. She was always fun to watch interact with the cast after she finished her villain segment. A lot of my own characters tend to follow a “cute, but actually evil” character archetype to them, so maybe that’s why I enjoyed her so much. 

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Again, I miss the little line breaks I could do back in the old days of Tumblr.

Regardless, despite my praise I can’t recommend this series. I ordered the full DVD series with episode commentaries from the dub staff, but I don’t think I’ll come back to this anime unless I have a really specific itch for it. Instead, I think I’ll throw out some anime that are a little more worth watching.

Armed Girl’s Machiavellism isn’t a combat school anime per se, but it is an action series that takes place in a school and has combat in it. It’s a pretty fun ride throughout with a surprisingly likable main character. You can catch this on both VRV and Amazon, though I know for a fact the dub is on VRV if you’re into that like I am.

Chivalry of a Failed Knight is a combat school anime that has been seen as probably one of the better, if not best, combat school anime out there. It takes it’s premise seriously, it takes it’s action seriously, and still keeps an overall lighthearted tone. I’d definitely recommend giving this one a shot if you’re interested.

And while a little out of left field, Grimgar of Fantasy and Ash is about to replace Absolute Duo on my yearly watchlist since if the Isekai boom isn’t fizzling out anytime soon, I might as well watch a good one to remind myself of how this genre should play out. It’s... an Isekai show that takes it’s premise a little more seriously and deconstructs the general a little bit. I’d say a good comparison would be a much lighter version of Goblin Slayer with some Isekai elements thrown in.

And I believe that’s it. I’ll catch you all later when I do the Weekly Update tomorrow.

[graykaren333]

Dramas I’ve Rewatched

So I’ve been watching kdramas since 2012.  We’re talking compulsively, obsessively at times, usually exclusively, consistently watching kdramas.  (Because they are way better than American/Western TV shows/entertainment but that’s another post for another day; besides, if you’re reading this I’m sure you already agree with me on that point).  So bottom line is I’ve watched over 175 kdramas (I’m not quite at the 200 mark yet) and I’ve kept accurate lists of which dramas I’ve finished and liked or finished and didn’t like (or in this case finished, and then eventually went back and rewatched).  When your sites are always set on trying to watch new dramas that are coming out or trying to make sure you’ve watched old classic ones for the first time, it can be hard to convince yourself to take the time to rewatch ones you’ve already seen.

That being said, the following 20 kdramas are ones that I have gone back and rewatched at least once, in some cases multiple times.  These dramas either had fantastic plotlines that were so tight and consistently moving that it was just fantastic to see all the pieces fit together even when rewatching OR there were anywhere from one to four characters who I became so invested in that I loved watching their character development.  Do the characters create the plot or does the plot create the characters?  Sometimes it’s hard to know which is more prominent but I will try to highlight which stood out for me.

NO SPOILERS: the following are reviews have no spoilers as to specific details, they just contain an assessment as to why I believe I could go back to them and rewatch them.

WARNING: for some of these dramas I have skipped watching some subplots, even when I went back and rewatched it, because I was either too obsessed with the main characters’ interaction or else I was so minimally invested in the characters in the subplot that I just didn’t care to watch.  I will let you know with a WARNING message as to which dramas that happened for.

Everyone has their own opinions on what kdramas are good or not and everyone has their own thoughts on what constitutes a good kdrama and why, but for me, here is the crème de la crème of the kdrama world:

Shut Up Flower Boy Band (slice of life/coming of age)

Unique elements: In my opinion this is hands-down the golden standard of slice-of-life/school age dramas (and I’ve seen most that have been made in the kdrama world!).  The plotline basically follows a group of high school age guys and if you look at them from the first episode to the last episode, there is no doubt that it is a coming of age drama but without year-long jumps in each of the last six episodes (*cough, cough* Reply/Answer Me series *cough*).  The plotline is fantastic in that it gets us to invest in every one of the group of guys and then the plotline keeps up a brisk pace and never gets bogged down in any one plotline.  Plus, the male lead does have a love interest which is so adorable and I get particularly obsessed with that plotline but I really love the whole entire plotline. Because the male lead, especially as portrayed by Sung Joon, is simply fantastic.

Reasons why I rewatch it: fantastic plotline!  The characters are really great too, let’s be honest.

Assessment: should be a cult classic but isn’t

Heartless City (action)

Unique elements: This drama originally aired on a cable channel in Korea so it is really unparalleled in its hard-hitting action and suspense as well as its willingness to show, well, violence.  But the violence always serves a purpose and moves the plotline forward, it’s not just meaningless violence (I’m looking at you, Mr. and Mrs. Smith movie).  It is filmed a la film noir and pulls it off to a “t”.  Literally all of the characters have so much moral ambiguity as to their decisions and behaviors.  So many twists and turns, the bad guys turn out to be good and the good guys turn out to be bad that is there really even a line between the two anymore? And this is much more highlighted than with any other kdrama I’ve ever seen.  Think 24 in intensity meets the mafia. It’s kind of my guilty pleasure.

Reasons why I rewatch it: Other than the fantastic plotline as detailed above, the male and female leads are so fantastic!!  Jung Kyung Ho’s character is so dark and brooding yet fantastic and smart and calculating, yet not always, especially around the female lead’s character. While their scenes together are few and far between, the scenes are always electric (we’re talking sparks coming off the computer screen).  The way Jung Kyung Ho acted out this complicated character with all the character’s nuances is just a delight to watch and the character is easily in my top five favorite characters of all time.  I am convinced that no one else could have played the character so well.  Plus, we slowly get more and more of the various characters’ backstory as the plotline progresses and I always love that kind of plotline.  How obsessed with this drama do I get?  When I rewatch it, it usually only takes me three days to watch it.  And it’s 20 episodes long.

Assessment: should be a cult classic but isn’t

Mrs. Cop 2 (action)

Unique elements: Nothing particularly unique except for Kim Bum’s character.

Reasons why I rewatch it: Kim Bum’s performance is one of my all-time favorite performances and his character is one of my all-time favorite characters.  His female foil is moderately appealing at best in general but she is always able to hold her own as a character in her scenes with Kim Bum’s character. Kim Bum’s character makes this drama and on that reason alone it is a good enough performance to watch the drama.  He inherited his family’s business but he is the first kdrama CEO that I’ve seen who hasn’t acted all entitled when facing the police…but he might also be a serial killer?  This drama is another guilty pleasure of mine.

WARNING: there are numerous subplots that I did not watch (female lead’s home life interactions) or rewatch (all of the rest of the scenes that Kim Bum wasn’t in, lol, even including other police scenes)

Assessment: stunning performance by one of the actors

Two Weeks (action)

Unique elements: Nothing except for the incredibly tightly written plotline.

Reasons why I rewatch it: The reason for this one is plotline, all the way.  I love the characters and am invested in them but I am invested in them because of the particular situations that they are thrown into because of the premise of the plotline.  Jang Tae San is a small-time gangster who more or less grew up on the streets and has had to figure out life on his own.  He is set up for murder and has to survive without getting killed (by either the police or the people who set him up) for two weeks until he can give lifesaving surgery for his daughter. Every episode is a day except for the first and last episodes.  Let me tell you, this drama is so tightly written that no scene is wasted.  There are a surprising amount of characters and they are connected in often surprising ways.  Desperate times call for desperate measures.  Also, we more or less get thrown right into the plotline and slowly get the backstory as the drama progresses.

Assessment: terribly underrated

Suspicious Partner (action and romance)

Unique elements: Nothing overly notable

Reasons why I rewatch it: I’m a sucker for kdramas that blend both action/suspense and romance. And this drama does that to a “t”. So the first couple of episodes are rather crazy and you’re just sitting there wondering where in the heck the plotline is going but then it finally settles in to a bit of a procedural courtroom drama with the male and female leads both being lawyers.  But wait, there’s a serial killer who is after them so they are trying to figure out who it is and bring the person to justice before he, you know, kills them.  There is also a consistently developed romance plotline between the male and female leads that is very intense at times and the characters just have fantastic chemistry.  The plotline rarely drags even during the procedural courtroom episodes, the plotline swiftly moves through the cases and doesn’t get bogged down.  Ji Chang Wook plays the male lead and is stellar.  I absolutely love the character.

Assessment: terribly underrated

 Strong Woman Do Bong Soon (action and romance)

Unique elements: Nothing overly much; action and rom-com with a slight twist of sci-fi

Reasons why I rewatch it: So, Do Bong Soon comes from a long lineage of incredibly strong women (we are talking she can lift a car as though it were a paper clip) and her strength cannot be lost as long as she doesn’t use it for evil ends.  Along comes the male lead, a CEO of a company, and when he finds out about her powers she becomes his bodyguard and hilarity ensues, as does a serial killer which is decidedly less funny.  The scenes between the two of them are absolutely fantastic and it is simply a great romance plotline with gradually less comedy and more thriller/suspense, but just as much romance if not more, as the plotline progresses.  The male lead is also quite a complex character as the storyline unfolds.

WARNING: there were some workplace subplots that I just didn’t care enough to watch as well as scenes between the female lead and the second male lead (he’s as interesting as a pile of snow if you ask me).

Assessment: terribly underrated

Oh My Ghostess (action and romance)

Unique elements: This is the only drama I’ve seen that starts out almost completely as a rom-com and then slowly ombre’s into an action/thriller (with decidedly romance elements) by the end.

Reasons why I rewatch it: The premise of this show involves ghosts (surprising I know, based on the title) and it’s different in that most dramas that are supernatural like that either progress on the premise that ghosts are more or less harmless and it’s just comical with inhabiting people OR all ghosts are purely evil and we should be terrified at the thought of what they can do.  Well this drama said, “You are going to force us to choose one premise over the other?  No thanks, we’ll take both” which is how you can start with a rom-com and end with a suspense/thriller.  The overall plotline is fantastic.  No particular character overly stands out in my mind.

Assessment: it was not what I was expecting going into the drama but I absolutely loved it and it is terribly underrated

Healer (action and romance)

Unique elements: Not really anything in particular

Reasons why I rewatch it: Ji Chang Wook is at it again!  He plays yet another fantastic character as the male lead and the audience becomes very invested in seeing him accomplish his goals.  The female lead is sweet and adorable but also bad-ass in some aspects.  The romance elements between them are consistently developed throughout each episode in parallel to the action elements.  

WARNING: There is a really intricate and complicated and interrelated backstory of several of the characters that feels very melodrama-ie and really bogs down the plotline at times including many subplots that I’ve never bothered to rewatch after the first watching.  

Assessment: accurately rated very high by many people, and maybe even slightly overrated at times given how it gets bogged down at times, but still well worth watching

Descendants of the Sun (action and romance)

Unique elements: a special ops guy as the male lead and a doctor as the female lead?  Yeah, that’s pretty unique!

Reasons why I rewatch it: I honestly kind of want to marry the male lead.  He’s so bad-ass at his job, yet so down-to-earth yet suave in his personal life; his job gives him this aura of secrecy and danger yet he is honest-to-goodness a fantastic guy.  The female lead character is good but doesn’t always hold her own in her scenes with him.  It is rather fascinating to see them work things out as a couple when they are so obviously attracted to each other and really have fantastic chemistry together but view the idea of helping people from very different ideological viewpoints based on their respective jobs.  The action elements come from the missions it shows him doing but the plotline focuses much more on the progression of the romance.

WARNING: I was so obsessed with the leads’ romance story that I had a really hard time not skipping over all other subplots.  

Assessment: accurately rated very high by many

City Hunter (action and romance)

Unique elements: not too many except that it is perhaps the oldest action drama that has consistent and good action scenes throughout the plotline.

Reasons why I rewatch it: Lee Minho’s character is SO fantastic and he gives an excellent performance of it (his eyes are so expressive); it’s a complex character and he really does it justice.  The action and romance plotlines are developed nicely in parallel but through most of the drama are separated by a thin veil that is Lee Minho’s character’s mask. The female lead is adorable though a bit ridiculous at times given her job as a bodyguard, but her chemistry with Lee Minho’s character is still quite good.  

WARNING: Upon rewatching this kdrama, the plotline does really drag at times when it gets into all the politics of the specific men that he’s going after.  Still, a must-watch.

Assessment: accurately rated very high by many

The Woman Who Still Wants to Marry (romance)

Unique elements: Minimal if any

Reasons why I rewatch it: Kim Bum. Kim Bum.  Kim Bum. His character is fantastic and of course he is fantastic in how he portrays it.  His character is in his early 20’s and he’s a musician who plays the guitar and piano and the character just has a fantastic presence about him especially in his scenes with the female lead who is easily one of my favorite female leads of all time.  She is in her mid to late 30’s single, and rocking out her career, but she’s been through some pretty rough stuff on and off the job, too.  Their chemistry is fantastic.

WARNING: An oversized amount of screen time is devoted to exploring her on-the-job struggles and strife and I really don’t care about all those details especially when there’s a fantastic romance story to be told.

Assessment: rewatchable even if you have 30 kdramas on your list to watch that you haven’t even seen once yet

Personal Taste (romance)

Unique elements: Nothing much

Reasons why I rewatch it: Lee Minho.  Enough said. I constantly go back and forth as to whether or not my favorite character of his is in City Hunter or this drama.  This is one of those dramas that I first watched years ago and every time I go back to it I think, “it can’t possibly be as good as I remember, especially with all the dramas I’ve watched since then,” and then I watch it and am reminded of just why and how it is so good!  Lee Minho’s character is just so fantastic. The female lead is kind of cliché and dopy at times but they have really great chemistry together, they both have really good backstories that make you invest in the characters, and it has so many funny elements.

WARNING: No matter how many times I rewatch this drama, there are some characters that I just can’t get invested in so there are a few subplots that I have never watched

Assessment: while it is a classic kdrama and gets mentioned on lists fairly often, it doesn’t get nearly the recognition it should

One More Happy Ending (romance)

Unique elements: nothing in particular

Reasons why I rewatch it: Jung Kyung Ho is at it again! This is kind of a slice-of-life/romance about a group of people in their mid-30’s who are killing it at their jobs but not so much in their personal lives.  The romance plotline between Jung Kyung Ho’s character as the male lead and the female lead is really riveting and fantastic.  I just end up getting obsessed with their plotline.  It was one of those dramas where you look back on it at the end and you can’t really remember anything specific or noteworthy that happened yet it was all just so fantastic; you can’t really remember why you were so obsessed with it yet every time you go back to rewatch it, it is just as fantastic.

WARNING: There are a lot of secondary leads with the female lead’s group of friends and I can never get really invested in her friend’s subplots.

Assessment: rewatchable even if you have 30 kdramas on your list to watch that you haven’t even seen once yet

My Secret Romance (romance)

Unique elements: Even though the leads have a one night stand in the first episode, the female lead is able to act cool like it didn’t affect her but the male lead character can’t really get over it and it’s obvious to everyone who’s close to him

Reasons why I rewatch it: At 14 total episodes, this kdrama is almost exclusively focused on the main leads’ romance plotline – and what a plotline it is!  The whole dynamics of him ending up being her CEO are just so much fun – it’s such a good premise.  No matter how many times I’ve seen it, I always get obsessed with this drama when I watch it.

Assessment: terribly underrated

Legend of the Blue Sea (romance)

Unique elements: The premise itself is highly unique. (Also, Lee Minho!  Lee Minho!)  Each episode begins with a few minutes of a storyline of a relationship between a magistrate and a mermaid in the Joseon era.  Then it jumps to present day and we end up meeting a lot of the same actors from the Joseon era plotline and basically everyone is reincarnated from that era and are very similar to who they used to be in their past lives.  The male lead (Lee Minho’s character) starts learning more and more about his Joseon era self after he finds out just how much they look alike and he also starts having dreams from his past life in the Joseon era. Does history have to repeat itself entirely or can he change his fate for himself and the woman he loves?

Reasons why I rewatch it: The characters of ok on this one, but it is the plotline and the premise that really carries this one.

Assessment: terribly underrated

High Society (romance)

Unique elements: First of all, the female lead has all the sociopolitical clout and backing coming from a very rich family while the male lead grew up in a very poor family and he has always strived to make great gains in the business world.  I especially love the ambiguity and mystery found in the male lead (who is fantastically portrayed by Sung Joon).  Second, it follows the romance journey of two couples: for the male and female leads, their characters focus on internal strife, conflict, and angst – internal difficulties as they both wish to be raised as the other had; the secondary male and female leads are both simpler and less ambiguous characters but there romance plotline is no less compelling as they face mostly external, not internal, pressures regarding their relationship.  

Reasons why I rewatch it: The plotline is fantastic and I am obsessed with all four characters’ relationships to each other.

Assessment: terribly underrated

Coffee Prince (romance)

Unique elements: nothing in particular

Reasons why I rewatch it: Another drama that is a classic drama because of how old it is, Coffee Prince has strong comedic elements, especially towards the beginning, and also has a slice-of-life feel with following subplots for several of the workers at the coffee shop, but presents them in a slow enough way that we are invested in all of the characters.  With the female lead pretending to be male for most of the drama, this is certainly a gender-bender drama.  I usually find myself questioning if it really is as good as I remember it to be and then when I rewatch it, it confirms itself to me that, yes, it has stood the test of time.  Plus, Gong Yoo’s performance as the male lead is impeccable – he’s not just acting the character, in those moments he IS the character.

WARNING: Some of the subplots with the various supporting characters can slow the drama down at times so I have been known to skip some of these scenes, especially when I’m feeling particularly obsessed over the male and female leads’ interaction.

Assessment: accurately rated very high by many

Boys Over Flowers (romance)

Unique elements: literally zero, haha, but it is one of the most classic and well-known kdramas of all time.

Reasons why I rewatch it: Before you roll your eyes, let me just say two words: Kim Bum.  The reason why I’ve rewatched this drama multiple times is to solely watch only the scenes that Kim Bum is in, because I’m kind of obsessed with his performance in this drama, honestly.  He was the original “bad boy” character I became obsessed with and was the first character that went on my favorite characters list. I love seeing his character development, especially in regards to his female love interest (I honestly think his character has more character development than the male lead, or at least just as much, and he has a forth as much time devoted to his subplot).

WARNING: Because it is such a freaking long drama, it can tend to easily drag, even for scenes pertaining to the male and female leads.

Assessment: stunning performance by one of the actors

Cinderella and the Four Knights (romance)

Unique elements: not too many, really, if any at all

Reasons why I rewatch it: In some ways it feels similar to Boys over Flowers in that there’s one female lead who is interacting with several male leads, all of whom have significant screen time.  But unlike Boys over Flowers, the plotline rarely if ever drags and I pretty much feel equally invested in all the characters and especially with the romance triangle between the female lead and the male lead and secondary lead.  It’s one of those dramas that at the end of the drama you just think, “what was the plotline even about?  I don’t know, but I was obsessed about it!”

Assessment: terribly underrated

Another Oh Hae Young (romance)

Unique elements: very unique premise.  Basically, the male lead keeps having sudden, short visions of the future that all revolve around chance interactions with the female lead and he’s trying to figure out if he has the ability to have an alternative future from what he sees, especially when he sees a vision of himself getting violently hit by a car! But the female lead has struggles of her own: her life continually gets thrown into chaos over mix-ups with another person named Oh Hae Young.

Reasons why I rewatch it: the plotline is so fantastic.  I also really love the chemistry and tension between the male and female leads.

WARNING: there are a surprising amount of scenes dealing with the male lead’s, and especially the female lead’s, work environments that can really bog down the plotline at times – I’ve never bothered watching these scenes.

Assessment: terribly underrated

[blayzez]

I'm sorry, I know I don't usually post discourse on my blog. I'm just... really hurt right now.

At the age of 24, after spending my entire childhood forcing myself to believe I was straight because that's what my family and religion said I was supposed to be, I finally acknowledged that I was bisexual. Even then, I was still second-guessing myself: What if I only think I'm bisexual because the internet/social media makes it seem like the "In" thing? What if my sexuality is just a mask and not who I really am? What if, what if, what if. It was hard.

Then I saw Voltron. Lance seemed to have a bisexuality arc laid out for him, and it was obvious that he didn't quite know he was bi and/or wasn't emotionally ready to acknowledge it.

That was just so validating. It made me happy to know that being confused about your sexuality -- not being sure if you're the sexuality you think you might be -- was common enough to include it in a kid's show and it made me feel so much better! I was so happy, and with Lance's help (and the help of my friends and therapist), I was able to finally accept my sexuality for what it was. And I'm an adult. Think about how many kids his arc could have helped! Kids who were questioning, kids who were unsure, kids that might not being surrounded by a good support system and have to hide who they are. Lance was shaping up to be someone kids could really look up, admire, and in turn accept themselves for they are because of him.

And now that's washed down the drain. It meant so much to me, perhaps meant so much to a lot of kids that needed that role model, but it clearly meant nothing to the writers and that is just so disheartening.

This isn't even about shipping. I love K/ance with all my heart, but I would be okay with any endgame ship so long as it was written well. This includes keeping the characters in-character and allowing the romance to help in their character development. Keith was the most likely candidate -- he really did make Lance a better person and vice versa -- but if someone else filled that role and filled it well, I would have been perfectly fine with that! But that's not what we got. Instead, the boy who has been insecure ALL SERIES has to spend his only romance building up his partner and have that not be reciprocated. That most-likely-candidate boosted him up more than Lance's actual romantic partner, and that is just bad writing. That's not a good relationship. Relationships are two-way streets; you can't have only one of the partners be supportive -- they have to be EQUALLY supportive. And A//urance was not that. A//urance was rushed, did not help the characters develop in the slightest, and took away TWO great role models.

I don't like Allura. I think I've made this clear before, but I really don't like her. I was neutral to her in s1, then the whole Not-All-Galra arc happened in s2 and my opinion of her started going down at that point.

But she didn't deserve the hand she was dealt. She was the only woman of color in the main cast, and they KILL HER??? WHY????? I may not have liked her, but that doesn't mean she was a bad character! On the contrary, she was a great role model and I'm sure many girls of color looked up to her. And then they just kill her? First they take away the great role model Lance could have been as a confused bisexual character, and then they take away the only woman of color on the main cast. WHAT. THE. FUCK. You can't just do that! I feel so horrible for the kids who looked up to those characters only to have it all ripped out from under their feet.

Oh, but there was a random gay wedding at the end, so that makes it alllllllll better~

Except it doesn't. Adding in a gay wedding/kiss with little-to-no build-up is more likely to cause confusion than anything else. And it doesn't erase how dirty they did Lance and Allura. Both characters deserved better.

On the topic of shipping, yes, it was queerbait. I refused to believe the showrunners were doing that -- I absolutely refused because I trusted the showrunners completely. Surely they wouldn't have ALL OF THESE ROMANTIC PARALLELS between K/L with other canon romantic couples for nothing. Surely they wouldn't have developed K/L's relationship more than any other relationship unless there was a really good reason for it. SURELY THEY WOULDN'T BE OKAY WITH VAGUING ABOUT THE SHIP MULTIPLE TIMES AND BEING OKAY WITH DW USING K/L FOR MARKETING PURPOSES IF IT WASN'T GOING TO HAPPEN.

But nope. All of the media techniques to subtly hint at a romance used specifically for K/L meant nothing. It was just bros being bros nothing gay here.

And that is BULLSHIT.

Honestly, the whole season just screams, "SHOCK VALUE," to me. They wanted to shock people, but I don't think they really considered the repercussions of how they were doing it. I get shock value, bringing up the interest and encouraging audiences to rewatch the series to understand why the shock was actually built-up from the beginning, but there's right way to do it and a wrong way to do it. Voltron took the wrong way and screwed it up royally.

To be clear, I am not against straight ships. Far from it, some of my favorite ships are heterosexual. Nor do I fetishize mlm relationships -- K/L is only the second mlm relationship I've come to really love (the first being Hau and Gladion from Pokemon Sun & Moon). It's just that K/L really struck a chord with me and with so many other people, and to take that away for the sake of a straight ship and some shitty shock value? Dirty thing to do to the show's audience. Don't build up proper LGBT+ rep UNLESS YOU ACTUALLY FUCKING HAVE IT. The only rep? Shiro, and a hastily-added Zethrid/Ezor ship. Blaytz, too, but that was glossed over tbh and I wouldn't be surprised if a lot of the audience (not on tumblr because we analyze everything to death lol) completely forgot about Blaytz's interaction with that make Galra. That's not proper rep. That's throwing it in and thinking, "It exists so our job is done."

Media in general has being doing LGBT+ rep dirty for SO LONG. Even when we had positive LGBT+ characters in media, they were still characters based off of gay stereotypes. They were good positive characters, but were still perpetuating a certain bias against LGBT+ by displaying these stereotypes as fact. Times are supposed to be different now. We're supposed to be progressing, making it BETTER. I really thought Voltron was going to be part of that progress, that it would give us a well-written, well-developed, well-loved LGBT+ representation for kids of this generation to look up to and admire and learn acceptance -- about themselves and about others -- from. Instead, the showrunners three half-assed, tacked on LGBT+ reps and called it a day.

THAT'S NOT COOL.

This isn't about ships. This is about proper media representation for the LGBT+ community -- something that is really scarce, even now -- and how it affects the LGBT+ community when it's done badly. This also goes for racial rep. You can take two misrepresented groups and treat them horribly and then call it good rep. IT ISN'T. The poor representation of the LGBT+ community has proved to be detrimental in society's view of them. THIS DOESN'T HELP.

*sigh*

Off the topic of that, can we talk about how shit the writing was? Because it was really shit.

I'll admit that while I like s7, it wasn't written amazingly-well. Still, it wasn't bad and did have plenty of interesting episodes. Even with all of the asspulls we got in the last episode, it was still awesome because we got to see Shiro back in his element after losing almost everything in prior seasons. It was a mix of good writing and bad writing, but the good writing made up for the bad.

The seasons previous to that were well-done. Maybe not s4, but the other seasons were well-written and really enjoyable! There's a reason the show took off; the plot maybe standard, but the characters, character dynamics, and relationships were fantastic and were the true driving force behind the series and its success.

So why was s8 so all over the place? Why were plot threads that had been hinted at or outright confirmed left hanging or tied together hastily? So many things were alluded to in previous seasons only to lead to NOTHING. WHY???

Why did everyone BUT Lance get an arc?

What was the point of Lance getting a sword if it was never going to be brought up again?

Why was Keith's arc suddenly thrown to the wayside?

Why did Allura have to DIE for her arc to reach its conclusion?

WHY?

So many people complained about bad writing in Voltron, but I had always believed that the writing in Voltron was relatively good. Sure, it had its problems (like the entirety of s4, and the MFEs being boring as shit), but it was mostly a well-rounded show with well-rounded characters.

And s8... just threw all of that away.

All of that potential, all of those good arcs -- wasted.

The writing went downhill SO fast, and it's just such a shame. Something that meant so much to me has dissolved into the mess s8 was. It's disheartening.

I also want to apologize to all of my followers who followed me because my K/L optimism and metas. I'm sorry if I got your hopes up; I really thought K/L was the logical conclusion -- everything was building up to it, right from the first episode and even continuing in s7 (hell, even s8 added to it) -- and I truly thought the writers were going to follow through with all of the logical conclusions the previous seasons built up. I had faith in them, but I was wrong. For that, I apologize. I know it's just a cartoon show, but I also know how influential and meaningful media can be -- especially for marginalized groups -- so if my hype bringing you up made your fall harder when s8 was released, I am so sorry. You didn't deserve that; nobody in the fandom did.

I'm so jaded and disillusioned right now. Voltron has been a major inspiration for me; I originally decided to be a cartoonist to bring LGBT+ representation to children's media because of Steven Universe, but it was Voltron that really motivated me to reach that goal. I looked up to Voltron -- it was my muse, my main inspiration. I've learned so much about writing -- writing character arcs, relationships, etc. -- from Voltron and all of the analyzing people did. Seeing it devolve into what it did is upsetting. Something I loved so much has let me down, and I'm hurt and disappointed.

But more than ever, I want to create cartoons that don't do this; cartoons that tie up its loose ends, follow through with obvious character relationships, puts the main characters through complete arcs, and give proper development to them all. Cartoons that have proper LGBT+ and racial representation -- with LGBT+/characters of color that can be admired, that won't fall flat, that will teach the children of the generation about acceptance of others and acceptance of yourself regardless of sexuality, skin color, gender identity, etc. Voltron failed in that aspect; it was a compelling show that failed in everything it needed to succeed in. I refuse to make that same mistake.

With that, let's all look ahead to future and enjoy the fanworks that do these wonderful characters justice. Let Voltron's failure inspire you to create and make something better, something that will be much more impactful, much more meaningful.

Don't let it get you down; let it bring you up.

[theonceoverthinker]

OUAT 3X01 - The Heart of the Truest Believer

Finally, I can start Season 3! It’s been so long that I can HEART-ly believe it!

...Did you miss the puns? I missed the puns. I don’t think Emma did, because I’m just hanging on by a thread! 

(Ha! Snuck two in!)

Anyway, let’s get under the cut and see what this episode has to offer!

Press Release Emma, Mary Margaret, David, Regina, Mr. Gold and Hook enter Neverland to search for a kidnapped Henry, they’re greeted by a school of not-to-friendly mermaids who threaten to end their search before it begins; Henry finds himself on the run from the Lost Boys with another escapee from Peter Pan’s encampment; and Neal, recovering from his wounds, travels through the Enchanted Forest with Mulan in an attempt to learn the fates of Emma and Henry.

General Thoughts - Characters/Stories/Themes and Their Effectiveness Neverland Seas ”I blame you.” Yeah, I disagree, Emma. For one thing, this plays a pretty small part of the overall story. For another, while they tried to convince her of what to do, it was Emma’s ultimate decision to do it. As she says, “We’re the same age. We have equal amounts of wisdom.” For a third, their decision, while endangering Henry, saved Regina. For a fourth, the only people’s faults for Henry’s capture are Greg and Tamara. *sighs* Look, I get Emma’s grief and worry, but this writing direction doesn’t feel genuine for her to deflect blaming Snow and David. It feels like a conflict was thrown in so that there would be more of a disconnect between her and her family.  I love Emma, but I can admit when a scene makes her completely unsympathetic despite the framing telling me otherwise, and this is a prime example. And here’s the thing: This never comes up again! Emma doesn’t apologize to them. This moment is utterly pointless!

The importance of teamwork is the big theme of this segment and once we get over that hiccup of a scene as I just mentioned, it’s delivered incredibly effectively. The conflicts between the characters, both internal and external, are incredibly real and no one is holding back. And the twist of those conflicts causing the storm is handled well! Rumple presents the bare essence of the theme, about Emma’s lack of belief, and because he chooses to go off on his own, the narrative has him fail by putting him into a traumatising position, whereas Emma’s belief in their abilities as a team and, in correlation with Rumple’s speech, herself, allows for the rest of the Nevengers to succeed.

Neverland Island So I have a nice bit to say about this segment, but it all applies to my “Favorite Dynamics” segment, so you’ll see that down there!

Enchanted Forest There’s not really much to be said about the story other than I liked it. That’s not to say that I didn’t like it or I didn’t appreciate the characters re-introduced or the interactions between them, but it was rather simple and that just doesn’t leave me a lot to talk about in terms of a breakdown of themes of major character actions. Still, the pacing was nice and the story was engaging!

Insights - Stream of Consciousness -So I didn’t realize that Emma giving birth to Henry was the first scene of the season. For some reason, I was under the impression that it happened at the start of “Coming Home,” but I honestly love it being here. Immediately, you get the sense that this arc was well planned so that it could return to this moment at the end of “Coming Home.”

-Also, I love that flicker of light as Emma gives birth! Such a special part of Emma’s life -- one filled with both joy and misery as she decides to give Henry away -- deserves the magical treatment!

-I seriously got choked up as Emma denied her chance at being Henry’s mother from the start. There’s so much love for him from the start and while it’s causing her so much pain, she’s doing what she thinks is best for him. And the gentle and yet powerful way the theme plays in the background just kills me. Swan Believer forever!

-Damn, what a cool way to go back to the present! We’re put right in the action, not missing a minute of the adventure.

-I will NEVER get over how much I love hearing Killian say “Neverland.” Whether in “The Crocodile” or here, Colin puts so much energy into the word, encompassing the danger and adventure to be found there.

-”It’s a good thing you guys don’t ask any questions.” My sentiments exactly, Henry!

-”More time than I care to remember trying to leave this place to kill Rumplestiltskin.” This provides some interesting insight into Killian’s character. It implies (to me) that he devised his Dreamshade plan with quite a few years to spare before his escape, whereas I always assumed that the planning took most of the time and that the escape was just a pinch of time towards the end.

-”Villains don’t get happy endings.” It’s incredible that this line, said by a character that left so little of an impression, is what follows Regina, Rumple, and Killian throughout basically the rest of the series.

-”That’s a great use of our time. A wardrobe change.” To be fair, Killian, Rumple’s not going to be in fighting shape sporting a Calvin Klein suit. This...honestly weird ass outfit makes the most sense.

-”You don’t believe in your parents, you don’t believe in magic, or even yourself.” Talk about a kickass line of foreshadowing of all that she’s going to overcome by the end of this arc!

-”When have you ever taken a real leap of faith?” Give it about a half hour, Rumple!

-So I must say, it’s funny that a lack of evidence is brought up as such a big story element here, but once Tink enters the picture, it’s her need for evidence as to the safety of their voyage back that secures it. A bit of dissonance, but nothing too severe.

-I love how Rumple spins his cane as he disappears. Rumple is the most beautifully extra person across the realms.

-I probably should’ve discussed this last time, but I love the design for the Lost Boys. They give off this air of being lost souls and their numbers stand to make them very intimidating.

-So going off of Greg’s death as well as the events of “Awake,” I’m gonna say that a shadow rip doesn’t necessitate death unless the shadow ripper wants it to mean death.

-”No time for questions.” I like that subtle line that’s in tune with Greg and Tamara’s line of no asking questions, foreshadowing the revelation about him.

-Damn! JMO is strong!

-The dialogue in the scene with Neal, Mulan, Aurora, and Phillip flows so naturally!

-”How long was he with you?” ”Long enough for me to know that I miss him, too.” I normally don’t make timeline jokes, but...come onnnnn!

-”I will not be capsized by fish.” This may be my new favorite David line.

-Also, any pretense that murder leaves any long-lasting effects of Snow and David go the fuck away when David tries to kill mermaids.

-Why didn’t Regina get rid of them earlier?

-”If Pan wants you, he WILL get you.” This line is delivered so well. Pan is not only just barely holding out from outright bragging, but is trying to deteriorate Henry’s belief and seeing that it isn’t working, cementing his part to play in Pan’s ploy.

-”Lead the way.” Am I the only one humming “Follow the Leader?”

-I like how, until Rumple enchants her, Tamara physically can’t talk. Very realistic.

-You know, everyone talks about heart colors when it comes to Rumple, Regina, Snow, and Killian, but does anyone notice how Tamara’s heart was pretty freakin’ red when Gold crushed it?

-Did no one read “Lord of the Flies?” Get the conch shell away from your enemies!

-”Filet the bitch.” I’m starting to think that all of my favorite character lines in this show have to do with aquatic life.

-”We need to think this through.” Emma, that why they’re shouting at each other. They’re discussing the matter.

-Okay, so I’m not the biggest Robin Sr. fan (And I’m hoping that this rewatch changes that for the better), but this was a solid entrance. It feels iconic, plays to the character’s power and good nature, and the more neutral yet noble tone that the scene requires plays well to Sean’s strengths.

-”See these markings? He was keeping track of me growing.” Awwwww!!! Papafire moment! That was necessary and beautiful!

-I just realized, this is our intro to blood magic! Cool!

-”I ruined YOUR life?” Regina, please. I thought we were past that…

-”Don’t call my wife a slag!” Yeah, Killian. You deserved the fuck outta that punch.

-I love the music that plays during the flying sequence! It’s gorgeous, distinct, and whimsical!

-CAPTAIN CHARMING BROMANCE!!! We have taken off!

-So I’m guessing that Rumple has encountered Felix at least one or two times.

-”Each of us have been too busy being at each other’s throats to be believers.” Those things aren’t correlated.

-”We need to do this the right way.” “No, we don’t. We just need to succeed.” YESSSS! Emma! That is my girl! She gets her tactics from her mama!!

-”It’s easier to get people to hate something than to believe.” That’s...incredibly accurate.

Arcs - How Are These Storylines Progressing? Everyone Working Together AND The Mission to Save Henry- ”It’s time for all of us to believe, not in magic, but in each other.” Emma’s speech took a sentence to get going, but once it did, DAMN did it get good! Now, as one gleams from this episode, these two arcs are one and the same. The only way Henry is saved is by working together, and this episode completely captures why that’s so important.

Emma Accepting Her Parents - This second-part-of-an-arc got off to SUCH a weak start, and that’s frustrating because I KNOW it gets better from here. But what I said above does apply.

Greg and Tamara - “We don’t ask questions. We just believe in our cause.” Holy crap. Tamara and Greg went from being two pretty intelligent and well designed villains into being total morons. I will say, part of me is glad that they did because if not, their conflict would’ve been way too close to a science vs. religion debate for comfort. But they also die here. To be honest, if anyone but Rumple was to find one of them, I’d rather it have been Greg who got the additional moments of life to speak and allow for Henry to get away. His story, well, was actually a story, whereas Tamara’s connection to Neal is loose at best.

Killian’s Redemption - Killian’s redemption takes an honest-to-goodness step forward. He’s acting on his decision to care about someone other than himself (And that shows through the two people aboard the ship that can stand him), but still has quite a bit of his verbal firepower and contempt (Towards David and Rumple) that reminds us of his villainous past and that his redemption won’t be all sunshine and rainbows.

Rumple’s Redemption - Rumple takes what is a realistic step back, though I’m not even certain I should call it a step back. Despite being his Rumple-y self, the narrative makes it very clear that his decision to dessert the group and chastise them beforehand are made on behalf of the mission to save Henry. And as we see the personal trials he’s already taken on in this pursuit with the confrontation with Pan’s minion, there’s so much power that grows with these decisions.

Regina’s Redemption - Regina also takes a step back into some of her more vicious tendencies: hating on Snow, defaulting to magic and violence for all her solutions. I personally like this because while there’s an understanding that these people are family, the anger and resentment between Regina and them is still present and in the heat of the moment, Regina won’t forget it. I will say, the Regina Blames the World trope is back and it still annoys me, though slightly less so here because the framing wasn’t going for sympathy in that moment.

Favorite Dynamic Henry and Pan. Pan’s dynamic with Henry sets up perfectly the kind of monster he will be for the rest of the season. He’s an incredible manipulator and plans out everything he says in order to activate Henry’s belief just when he needs to. Look at the way he set up the pixie dust and how that moment pays off! It’s makes for a triumphant moment that becomes terrifying in hindsight. But what makes this dynamic work so well is how it is set up. In the few minutes we see before Pan’s disguised appearance, Neverland has shown itself to be a cruel place. The location itself is darkly lit and the two villains of the previous season are violently murdered. Because of that, we as an audience clutch to Pan just as Henry does and because of that, for the first time, our belief causes suffering as the deception is exposed.

Writer Adam and Eddy, as usual start up the season! And I honestly like it. A lot of it is good! I’d compare it to the Season 1 finale where it’s a good mix of story and character moments (And just like in the Season 1 finale, has a completely pointless and aggravating moment, but thankfully, this one doesn’t mean a lot)! I feel like the characters were put in a solid place where they have room to grow and are put somewhere that keeps them intimate and gives them opportunities for great dynamics!

Rating 9/10. This episode is a great way to start off the season! The settings and themes have been set up well, and the characters are in good form! It’s exciting and adventurous, but nerve racking all the same. It makes me super excited for what’s to come!

Flip My Ship - The Home of All Things “Shippy Goodness” Captain Swan - Look, season 2 was not Captain Swan’s golden time for shipping (For me, at least), but Season 3 is here and they are glorious! Killian is incredibly respectful of Emma, comforts her over her worries, addresses underlying grief she has for Baelfire, and supports her as she prepares for Neverland’s horrors. It’s honestly amazing! Also, Emma and Killian are sailing the Roger together during the storm!! They’re working together and it is the BEST!!! Ship of dreams...quite literally! Swanfire - And don’t think I forgot about Swanfire! Both Emma’s grief and Neal’s devotion to getting back to her is such a big presence in this episode. “Tell Emma I’m alive, and that I love her.” Letting Emma know that he’s both okay and loves her is Neal’s main priority and that’s just incredible! And I loved Neal’s scene with Mulan as he discusses his regrets leaving Emma. <3

-----

Woohoo! Season 3 is off to a solid start and I can’t wait to take the rest of Peter Pan’s Flight! Thank you for reading and to the fine folks at @watchingfairytales!

Next time...I don’t know. Reader, help me out, cause I’m lost...girl… ;)

See you guys then!

Season 3 Total (9/220)

Writer’s Scores: Adam and Eddy (9/60)

Operation Rewatch Archives

[queen-ofsunflowers]

October 2018 Progress

Michael Mell: Ace Attorney - A lil’ bit of progress has been made. I edited Chapter 20, the end of Turnabout Goodbyes, and am currently writing it’s bonus chapter. I have the characters planned out for Rise From The Ashes. And I think fans of the Newsies will like it... maybe. Maybe not. I don’t know. Progress: 20.5/32

Turnabout Fairytale: A Land Without Magic -The basics have been filled out at this point. I am trying to get at least two scenes done per day so I’ll be ready by December. Okay, back to what you came here for. Chapter one is done. And fair warning. There is a bit o’ angst straight of the bat. On both sides. I’ve started chapter two, and have about... three scenes done so far. It’s mostly just Edgeworth scrambling around trying to keep shit together. Not sure how people will handle it, but if you’ve seen the episode it corresponds with, I think You have an idea. Progress: 1/22

While we’re on the topic of Turnabout Fairytale, I’m thinking about rewriting chapter 17 of No More Happy Endings so it’s entirely AA characters. Sorry, Sebastian. But I have a good idea and I won’t let it go to waste. If people could let me know what they think about this, I would be grateful.

Phoenix Wright: Wizarding Attorney - The arc for Turnabout Sisters is done. I’ve started to work on Turnabout Samurai, and I’m sitting here thinking that there are so many instances in which magic can be used during the investigations. And I have to say that so far, it’s the most magical case in the fic. So much magic... and even a duel! Though, it will reveal some stuff about Maya in that case, and lead to a special chapter I plan to write in-between Turnabout Samurai and Turnabout Goodbyes. Ooo! And if anyone has read my Aromentia one-shot, it will tie in with the last chapter of the Turnabout Samurai arc! You’ll recognize it. You will. Progress: 5/30

A Family of Wild Cards: My Darling Twin - Not much progress made due to the fact that I keep putting off finishing Persona 3. Sorry, I’ve having so much trouble getting into it with the time I’ve had to myself lately. Anyway, I have made some progress. At this point, Kotone (FeMC) and Minato have run into Yukari. In the dark. With a gun. But I do have plans for future events! Such as Fuuka’s whole arc with being trapped in Tartarus and stuff. We get to see the siblings apart. In the meantime, I also have been coming up with ideas for the P4, DaN, Arena and P5 eras of this series. Some fun, some PAINFUL. Pain that I will revel in. Not sure if there will be ships in this fic though. Maybe, maybe not. If anyone has any recs, I would love to hear them! Progress: .083/???

From the Diary of a Not-So-Secret Prince - Not much progress done. Static. The same. Written a few bits, though. If anyone wants to talk about this AU, I would love to talk about it. (Princess Diaries/AA) Progress: 1/???

The Miraculous Turnabout: Creation and Destruction - Still not much progress done. Apollo is in the suit, has a knife pointed at him. So yeah, things are going well. I have gotten some stuff done around Akumas and akumatization and stuff. I am a horrible person for hurting your favorite characters. But it is necessary. Progress: .92/28

The Miraculous Turnabout: Ladybug and Black Cat - Basically AA1/Miraculous Ladybug. Told from Maya’s and Simon’s POVs. And it’s interesting writing from a younger Simon’s perspective. Anyway, I might have Rise from the Ashes a separate fic from this. Not much has been done with it. Just some scenes and ideas thrown around. Progress: 0.02/???

Legend of the Yatagarasu: Book One - Which is my Avatar AU that I’ve been posting about. No real name yet for the fic. Been progressing steadily with the basics for the chapters. Got some work done on chapter one, though. Getting a little farther in the story as a whole, even if the beginning is slow. I wanna space it out, add in some things, etc, to make it  Progress: .23/???

Team RAYN: Wake Up, Get Up, Get Out - If you’ve seen this post, you know about my Persona/RWBY AU. A lot of people liked it. More so than I expected. So, I’ve kinda... gone on with it. Got some stuff sorted out, some things still up in the air. Mostly just designing the weapons so I can write them out. Might need to rewatch a Persona 3/4/5 playthrough to get some characterization right. But I think it has some potential though! Anyone wants to see the weapons, I will be more than happy to oblige. I think I’m getting better with weapon combinations. I hate drawing guns. Progress: 0.24/21

I have more WIPs, but they are just snippets at this point and not actually written. As soon as they make it past the first scene, they’ll make it onto the list.

[chillafqueen]

My thoughts on Voltron (especially season 8)

As a collective, the series was great. I’m not going to shit all over it and denounce it for the rest of my life. I’m gonna rewatch it, write fan fiction, follow artists and writers who will continue to do amazing work. I’m still in the process of buying more merch. It’s in my top 5 favorite shows. That said:

I’m extremely disappointed in the show’s ending. From about season 5-6, I feel the writers were way in over there heads. They had so many ideas and characters they wrote and put into the show. Yes, there was some important moments its just uggh.

Imma just get into it.

First off, Takashi Shirogane He’s been through hell and back. He was an amazing character the writers just tossed to the side when they wanted to follow the original plot more. I mean, in the original series Shiro was never the black paladin. The original Shiro was the blue paladin and was killed off. Then was kinda, kinda not Sven afterwards. VLD’s Shiro was poorly planned. They make him the black paladin for what reason? To give us a spacer until the writers were ready to make Keith the leader and then we just push Shiro to the side. His clone doesn’t suffice. Clone Shiro/Kuron is just bullshit honestly. Real Shiro is actually dead/stuck in the inner quintessence of the black lion while his clone is fucking up Shiro’s image. Yes, Kuron is just a pawn in Haggar’s evil plan to defeat Voltron, but before we know that, we just see “Shiro” fight with Keith over how to lead Voltron, and yell at everyone. To make things worse, Shiro never gets to pilot Black again because Allura needs to be blue, Lance red, and Keith black to follow the originial series. The writers just shit all over Shiro. They take away his arm again, kill off his ex fiance, don’t give him anytime to mourn him really, season 8 doesn’t even ever mention Adam. Nothing.  Adam was there just to say “gay rep”. And Shiro is given the Atlas to pilot which is just Castle of Lions and Voltron’s love child. They think they can just take away Shiro’s claim on the black lion and just toss him a new ship to make it up?

Shiro had to constantly fight for the control of Black because Zarkon still had a connection. Shiro earned his right to be the leader. I love you, Keith, but Shiro deserves Black.  Shiro didn’t go through all this shit to hand it over to someone else. They hand him this ship that seems awesome but is overkill. Castle of Lions is gone what are we going to do? Oh, just make a new one except it turns into a thicc voltron. 

Then season 8 comes around and Shiro isn’t given any real new development. In fact he’s just a face at this point. He captains the Atlas but all the spot light is on the current paladins and Allurance. 

Like Keith and him are distant friends now???

And in the end we just throw him a rando to marry and call it good?

Next we have Pidge, who I don’t have as much to rant about. She’s my baby and I will protect her at all costs. The only real problem I ever had about my little Katie is the constant cliche thrown around every time she starts explaining science or math things using smart big technical terms and you get someone to say “in english this time” or “Just get to the point”. Like Pidge, you is smart but too smart omg just dumb everything down for us dumbs is a constant joke thrown into the show. Just let my girl use her big words and be proud of her intelligence. While she has a very great role, she deserves more instead of deus ex machina-ing everything.  

Now Allura. Oh boy here we go.  I love my beautiful strong black girl. She’s smart, resilient, and a fighter. They did her dirty.  I mean we just kill her off? I was rooting for her. WE was all rooting for her. She’s a grounded princess who just wants to end the war and do Altea some justice. instead we throw her into romance like there isn’t the constant threat of the Galra just waltzing in any moment? My girl deserved better. She becomes the blue paladin, and struggles with learning how to work with blue as one. And watching her over come that obstacle was amazing and I’m a proud mom. But we just kill her off? Like Altean Alchemy is a fictional practice in a fictional show. Why did it take both Honerva and Allura to fix it all? Why did it have to take their lives? Why couldn’t Allura just take a deep breath close her eyes like she’s done with everything else and then do her blue glowy stuff and boom, lets go home.

They made the rules so her death wasn’t necessary. They could make easier less mean rules

Was it the writers trying to find a way please more than one ship? Like they wanted Allurance but killed her off to make Lance single and ready to mingle with Keith or Pidge to make fans happy? Did they think after fixing all realities once more that Allura had no where to go? They didn’t want her to help bring all the planets together? Did they not want her to marry Lance? I mean, we ask how do we form Voltron without Allura, and she answers Voltron is no longer needed. Like is there really not going to be any rebellion that needs Voltron intervention? Who says someone in the Galra empire isn’t satisfied with the ending? Or someone in the Altean colony wants revenge? Voltron could still be used. plus just because Voltron is no longer needed why can’t Allura be needed still??  I also can’t stand the writing they did for her. I’m looking at you, Allurance.  Allurance isn’t one of my favorite ships just because of how it turned out. Lotor and Allura was even then a bit iffy, although was healthier than Allurance. With Lotura, Allura and Lotor bonded, had their Altean heritage in common. A common goal. They weren’t rushed together. They were amazing together, until the very end where Lotor goes insane with quintessence. Allurance is just forced. In the very beginning until about season 7 we see Allura ever showing any feelings for Lance. All this time it was Lance being a cheesy lover boy who was hot for the princess and in return Allura rolled her eyes or ignored his advances. Up until season 7 where Allura all of a sudden blushes and whabam, has a full blown crush on Lance. OUT OF NOWHERE. Sure, theoretically Allura could’ve just hid her feelings very well until that point.  This newfound love just mocks Allura’s character. A strong woman who needs no man, but you know that hot suave prince who no one could resist. Then all of a sudden right before a mission, Allura becomes a little school girl blushing and stuttering.  Anyway, Allura deserved better than being a martyr and a rushed relationship.

Next on my list is Lance. My very precious boy who I will end myself to make smile. HE IS A BEAUTIFUL BOY WHO DESERVES EVERYTHING. including Keith  Lance, a cocky pilot, a terrible flirt, a lover not a fighter. He has one of the best arcs in my opinion. He’s a star example of growing up. He is first just a goofy boy with no care in the world except to show up Keith and get the ladies. As time progresses he matures so much. Goddamn should I even write about him because I just love him so much. He becomes a ninja sharpshooter, gains confidence, fucking earns himself the title of paladin.  though, he is constantly used as an object for comedy or plot continuance. He is the stupid one of the group who doesn’t understand anything. He’s the classic funny guy. Makes jokes, big flirt, doesn’t understand the big words the smart ones make. But I gotta admit, I think Lance eventually realizes that character and that’s him. Once “Shiro” comes back Lance thinks someone has to give up a lion. The old Lance would’ve voted Keith off the island, but Lance at this point came to terms that Keith isn’t just his rival. Keith is a vital part of Voltron. Lance has faith in Keith as the leader, and a paladin in general. And Allura at this point made some amazing progress with Blue, the lion Lance prided himself on the one Blue picked. Lance was willing to give up Blue for Allura and give Keith back Red, the lion Lance also really wanted in the beginning as well. Lance questions his own worth. He realizes he’s the goofy flirt. He’s not as smart as Pidge or Hunk. He’s not as skilled of a pilot and fighter like Keith. He’s not a leader like Allura or Shiro. Lance eventually realizes his importance later on when he finally gets some recognition and praise. “That’s why we bring our sharpshooter” Lance also develops a huge real crush on Allura. While he always had a thing for her, he also had a thing for literally any other female being he had come across that was remotely attractive. His not so serious hard on for Allura turns into something beautiful. He sees her for more than her looks. He knows how fucking incredible she is and he knows he’s not worthy. 

But season seven fucks him over as well as everyone else. Forced Allurance. Lance had a big crush on Allura for years and waited patiently. Allura falls for Lance out of NOWHERE. That’s all fine and dandy cause I love my boy and he deserves happiness.  But in season 8 with their relationship, Lance becomes just the boyfriend. A complete opposite of his usual self. He’s serious and at Allura’s side 24/7 being her emotional support even though she really takes him for granted. Allura never really shows this compassion to Lance.  Lance is just the kid who got his feelings returned. But that’s all it is. The whole season is Lance being with Allura there is no Loverboy Lance. It’s just sullen boyfriend who is giving his all for this relationship. And Allura isn’t like this at all. She returns the hand holding, the hugs, the kisses, but she doesn’t give the emotional side back. Which I understand is because she has way more important things to worry about. That’s another reason why I hated their untimely relationship. This is not the time for a blossoming relationship. Allura isn’t in the mindset to give her all to this relationship. She’s busy with Honerva. allura doesn’t have time to be all uwu for some guy. And in the end Allura gives her life to save all of existence. she kisses Lance one last time, and gives Lance those marks which is never explained further. Like are those marks there to signify only the relationship that lasted a few months? Lance’s love for Allura or Allura apparent love for Lance? Do those marks give Lance some Altean abilities?  Lance the sharpshooter fighter pilot ends up just being a farmer on his family’s farm? Like maybe the harsh cold truth of war might’ve made him want to retire the spaceman dreams??? The writers also just plain lied to us about Lance. Lance’s endgame was supposed to be a slowburn? that Lance wasn’t going to be someone’s second choice? And in the end he’s just sad and depressed over Allura. At this point he’s just there to spread the gospel about Allura. I mean who knows? Maybe they left everyone without a significant other (besides Shiro) to keep it all up in the air. Like maybe Lance’s slowburn endgame is Keith but we don’t see it? 

Then my boy Keef.  My boyfriend, my husband, my child.  What a mess. They gave him EVERYTHING. He gets childhood flashbacks, childhood trauma, mommy issues, a loving parent relationship, a backstory, his mom even got a backstory. He’s an amazing fighter. He is a great leader. He has some good connections. He’s smart, an excellent strategist.  He also has trust issues, a lone wolf type of guy, and he has some problems sorting out his feelings. He learns patience, compassion, love, trust. He’s the whole enchilada until season 8, where pretty much everyone is thrown out the window except for Allura and Honerva.  Literally the only problem I have with the writing for Keith was season 8, him and Shiro have literally no interaction for shit?  “Brother, I love you.” Bitch where?

Keith traveled galaxies for Shiro. And season 8 they’re just two co-workers. 

Hunk I’ve had problems with since the very beginning. He doesn’t get enough love. He’s the big guy so he is always hungry, always thinking of food, gets tired easily, has little stamina, scared of everything. Sometimes I forget he’s literally a genius engineer? 

Romelle had more potential than to be one of Hunk’s chefs. I’m sorry. 

Coran is perfect. Don’t ever change.

In the beginning of the series, they weren’t writing characters well enough, and in the middle everyone had something, but in the end there wasn’t enough time to wrap things up nicely. It was rushed. The last season was a poor excuse for an ending.  Lotor deserved better. They hyped us up for Lotor’s return but it was pretty much just his corpse in the sincline??? We get his back story a bit. But in the end he still doesn’t get the mother he deserved?? And Allura and him never got some closure????

Krolia who? We spent all this time getting to know her and build her relationship to make her a background character.  Keith and her have no interaction in the last season?? 

They should’ve made Veronica and Acxa lesbians. Ezor and Zethrid deserved some wlw screentime. More than what we got at least. Not enough Colleen.

Definitely needed more of the mfes. Especially James. Like I wanted some interaction between Keith and James???? Something at least?????

Also, Bae Bae should’ve been made into a main character. 

Though with all my complaints. I’m really gonna miss the show. I didn’t spend as much time with it as a lot of you guys did. I finally watched it right before the 7th season came out. So I haven’t had as much time to analyze it or to experience every season like all of you. But I’m gonna miss this show. I’m really beating myself up over not watching it early on. Like I’d see it on my instagram, or here on tumblr, but never gave it a second thought. It was just some mech kids show that was gonna be hella cringey. But it ended up being a big part of my 2018 and I’m gonna be carrying it into future years. 

I never made any friends because of the show. I’ve never reached out, no one ever reached out. Seeing all of you interact, or reminisce over the times you all had over Voltron moments. While I’ve only known it for months and I’ve never have that time a lot of people did.

I have discovered many great writers, artists, cosplayers because of Voltron and I’m so fucking happy that I was able to find people who express their love for the show so much that they present it to the world in different ways and I get to experience it. 

I loved the show. And I will continue to love it. I want to thank all the cast and the people who made the show. And I’m gonna go rewatch this whole entire thing over and over again even if I’m not 100% on board with how they decided to end it, but who ever really likes endings?

[progmanx]

So? Part 2?

Well, now that it’s been released digitally, I can actually answer this question. Thank you for your patience. So, uh, spoilers, if you haven’t read Turf Wars Part 2 yet. I guess.

Short version: It’s just as bad as Part 1 (if not worse), but for slightly different reasons. For mine and @lokgifsandmusings‘s thoughts on Part 1, you can read our several articles about the first installment, as well as our good friend Bo’s take on Part 2 who makes some excellent points on why nothing works. I’m going to do my best not to reiterate the things he’s discussed, as I think his work does a better job of laying out that argument than I could. So go read that first, if you want.

Slightly Longer Version (That’s Shorter Than The Short Version?): Mike (there’s no way Bryan is actually consulting on anything aside from the art; Asami is his baby) clearly neglected to rewatch his own series/re-read his own series bible, and the scope of this negligence goes so far beyond nitpicking it’s baffling. The narrative threads and characterization of our two heroes are jumbled and essentially nonsensical.

Extremely Long Version: Sigh. I would like to preface this by asserting that my opinion of Turf Wars is in no way related to the work I did with RRaU, or Spin the Rails as a whole. Sure, I thought a lot about the world and this relationship, but frankly no conclusion I came to couldn’t also be reached by anyone else who puts in the time. Just because Mike continued the narrative differently doesn’t mean I wouldn’t like it automatically. The fact of the matter is, I really wanted to like this. It just so happens that the method Mike chose is…like, kind of the worst possible amalgamation of bad narrative decisions he could make short of turning full edgelord.

This got extremely long, hence the moniker, so it’s under the cut.

Anyway, my problems and critiques of Turf Wars are that of the product itself, how it chooses to continue the story of the animated series proper.

Now that that’s out of the way: I kind of hate almost everything about it. Yeah, I’m probably gonna lose followers for that. I want queer rep, and I want it badly, but if we can’t even criticize what we get without getting thrown out onto the street, how will it get any better? It’s not all or nothing.

Not even Turf Wars is all or nothing. I still stand by what @lokgifsandmusings and I said in our pieces regarding Part 1: It’s an overall good thing that it exists, and it’s not hurting anyone. However, that does not mean I think it itself is actually anything close to good, narratively speaking.

If I really had to boil down all of my problems with this…since Bo’s argument regarding how these books are overly stuffed with narratives that have no connection to one another aside from the fact that Asami gets kidnapped (we’re gonna dissect that one) and that none of it actually serves any purpose other than treading water for…something is so comprehensive and great. Seriously, read it!

Fact of the matter is, there’s no reason for any of these narratives to exist. It doesn’t push anyone’s character forward, with the exception of Zhu Li, Toguka (who even cares?), possibly Keum, and I guess by default Raiko by making him more of a jerk. None of those characters are the principal cast, meaning that this whole damn thing is, as far as I can see, really weird, overwritten filler.

Filler for what? I have no earthly idea, but if the only thing that changes out of this graphic novel series is that Zhu Li becomes President, then…you could have done that off-screen. Like how Raiko won. Neither Bryan nor Mike know how to write politics (or business, but that’s another conversation) so why not? Saves a lot of time.

Okay, so, there’s one other change that could happen in this “filler arc”. And it’s something that everything so far seems to be pointing to as a resolution. For anything to make sense, Asami has to basically say to Korra, “I’m a liability and will only keep getting in the way, so we either have to keep our relationship a secret or break up.” Probably to get rejected by Korra, or the world, or something. Which is just…terrible and ridiculous, as I’ll outline more in this post/rant/essay/dissertation. It has nothing to do with them being a same-sex couple, which is somehow both not as bad (because that shouldn’t matter) and worse (because of Kya’s infodump in Part 1).

Anyway, on to the biggest issues above all: our two “protagonists”. Well, more like the title character and also that lady she’s banging. Because it’s really hard to see how Korra and Asami are actually relevant to any of the narrative threads in this story aside from the ones they are forcibly pulled into so they can react to things. And this isn’t even accounting for how Mike is somehow able to write literally everyone else just fine except for Korra and Asami! It’s so freaking weird!

Korra, even more than she was in Part 1, has been almost comically back dialed to her Book 1 characterization. At best, it’s Book 2, but that is a stretch. Everything she does it to try and bust some heads, and even goes out of her way to physically assault Raiko’s campaign advisor. This isn’t even accounting the flagrant abuse of the Avatar State in Part 1, or the many other microaggressions that keep popping up.

Book 4 Korra would not do this. That was like—it’s her whole fucking series arc. She doesn’t look for fights! She tries to resolve them before they get bad, and especially with Asami she backs down and tries to diffuse and explain the situation. Like, you know, that time when Asami snapped at her in 4x07 in contrast to how Mako snapped at her also in 4x07?

But it goes deeper than tossing out years of character growth because “lol conflict”. I felt that the interactions between Korra and Asami here read embarrassingly straight. What I mean by that is, it’s how I imagine a straight dude would believe “special” relationships (ie queer, who aren’t) should be written. It’s something that a lot of non-queer writers struggle with, since there’s this false belief that treating those “different” from you as unique or better props them up, when in reality it artificially props them up in a way that is inherently insincere. Mike wants to show us he understands how important this relationship is, and how it’s important to him, but the words he’s choosing have the opposite effect.

It reminds me of the “Magical Negro” trope that originated in Hollywood as an absurd, and then eventually harmful, overcompensation for making sure people knew that they weren’t racist by making every minority character in a given film the perfect wisdom to set the hero on their journey. It’s same basic principle, as Mike is trying to make sure as loudly as possible that we know he’s super supportive of all of this…but the outcome is just plain weird and dangerous, even though his intentions are absolutely good.

Remember that bit in Part 1 where Asami says that the Spirit World is special and unique, like their relationship? Welp. It’s not. It was exceptionally well-written and true-to-life in its queerness but I guess not anymore, huh?

They’re more caricatures of their former selves than they are actual characters in these moments. The purest irony here is that these scenes, the “relationship scenes”, are actually pandering. Like, while the show wasn’t and yet anti-korrasami people kept yelling that it was (it wasn’t; that’s not how animation production works) boom, here we go. Actual pandering. (And yes, this is an entirely subjective opinion, but isn’t that kinda what this ask was for?)

Thirsty Asami, Overprotective Korra; these characterizations not only don’t make sense, but they’re exactly what the fandom has been asking for despite neither of them really fitting at all with previous characterizations. These things are supposed to build off one another, and yet they just go in random directions. Okay, fine, in fairness, Thirsty Asami only doesn’t make sense in the context we see it here, rather than a general sense. She can be horny, but that was the weirdest segue to that sort of tone, and it felt shoehorned in as fanservice. Need proof? Look no further:

I mean, seriously? The final lines of the TV show? That’s…every single fanfic writer has at least considered doing that because of the free sentimentality points due to the emotions attached to that final scene, but good lord that is some blatant not-helpful fanservice that, to me, feels automatically pandering right there.

Because that’s what their relationship reads as in these comics. Fanservice. It’s meaningless fluff that seems as though it’s actively refusing to progress either character in personal and communal growth. It serves no other purpose than to reinforce the idea that Asami is a liability (and that Korra’s feelings are the so super strong for her you guys that she’s overprotective lmao). Which is so beyond absurd a notion to have, according to the show itself, because Korra has been present for almost every doofus Asami has decked:

This is also depicted in the end of Part 1, where Korra chooses to save Asami (who is either drunk or high as balls considering her hilariously inept and counter-canon combat performance) from a rock instead of Tokuga. Which just ties into what happens to Asami at the end of Part 2. Yes, the kidnapping. I already talked about the kidnapping, and lo and behold, I was right. Tokuga kidnaps Asami to get to Korra (how original!), and is weirdly okay with them being in a relationship. Remember that homophobia in this universe that may still exist in the Fire Nation because nobody bothered to clarify that? Welp, apparently it didn’t mean squat because Korra just flat out tells a security guard that she’s dating Asami when they were all like “hey let’s keep this to ourselves for the time being”. Even the supervillains don’t care that queer people exist, I guess?

Which of course leads to this scene:

Okay, no. No, there are…so, so many ways to get out of this scenario. First, that’s not a real knife. It’s a fire made in the shape of a blade. It does have mass, but whatever level of “sharpness” it has can’t really retain shape because it’s FIRE. It’s not ice. Asami could presumably just run through it, suffering some nasty burns, and jump to safety because there are plenty of people there who could catch her. Second, that dude is an old man. Asami has taken down multiple terrorists simultaneously. She could just kick him in the balls with her heel. It’s super easy. Third, Asami has been trained in “self-defense” since her mother was murdered (we’ll circle back to this) by firebenders, the implication being that it was the Agni Kai Triad.

So, Hiroshi, being a hardcore genocidal anti-bender crazy person with a daughter insists that she start learning to defend herself at the age of like 5…what do you think those lessons are? I’ve covered this in my Jings and Other Things post, but frankly it doesn’t take a whole lot of thought to realize that “oh he’d make sure she was trained to fight against benders.” That actually circles back to point two, since hey, remember how firebending works?

Remember when Uncle Iroh was all “firebending comes from the breath, not the muscles”? Which lead to Zhao getting his butt kicked by Zuko? All Asami has to do is knock the wind out of this old geezer and jump. Or break his concentration, because, again, not a real knife. This is something she would absolutely know.

Elbow his stomach, kick him in the balls, bite his knuckles, break his nose with the back of her head, kick out his legs, throw herself backwards—the list goes on. Something so fundamental to the universe, to the point that it was sort of Zuko’s whole thing, rebelling against Sozin’s perverted firebending teachings (DANCING DRAGON FORM) through the previous series, being ignored and seemingly retconned because…Mike forgot? And didn’t do any research on his own work to make sure it remained consistent? Uh, okay.

You don’t need to be an action director to think of any of these, especially if you’ve seen the TV show in question. Also, just as an aside to Korra not being able to locate Asami…she, uh, has spirit GPS? Remember that? Through the vines? Found Wu, and Jinora. Just kind supports my theory that Mike forgot to watch his own show. Since that was like, important to Korra’s healing arc.

Anyway, for Asami’s character as a whole…good lord. I don’t…she’s, again, either drunk or high as balls. I mean how else do you explain her being super chill and okay with working with Zhu Li in the first place? Didn’t her husband steal her company? Something that Zhu Li had to have been complicit in considering she was in prison with him? None of this makes any sense! Asami’s convictions on what is just and what is not are kind of her core (remember the Equalists?), so for them to just be thrown out because plot is a little strange and disconcerting.

I’m not saying she wouldn’t work with Zhu Li for the good of the city; she did the same with Varrick and that rings true to me because it’s not like she spent three years rebuilding the fucking thing. Of course she’d be protective of it! It’s also her home. But all of that pales in comparison to the single most glaring thing that is addressed briefly, in passing, in Part 1, but isn’t even mentioned in Part 2:

I just—Korra got a phenomenal healing arc. Asami is the second half of this couple that they are banking these book sales on, and she’s not given room to grieve? To acknowledge that her father was not only murdered, but sacrificed himself to save her life and how complicated and conflicting those feelings have to be considering he tried to murder her back in Book 1? Yeah, that is a meaty subject matter that can absolutely be tackled by a comic. You just sort of have to actually do it and not sweep it under the rug. But that’s what they do, despite the fact that he’s been dead for, oh, I dunno, like less than a month? Nobody can recover that quickly. No one. Not even the Avatar, and we literally saw that in action.

I get that Kuvira isn’t physically in this, and that the corpse of the massive mecha-giant that could not have possibly been moved via conventional means (it was covered in vines that not even Korra can safely remove, remember?) is randomly missing after Korra and Asami get back from their vacation but I really feel like Raiko’s surrender directly leading to Hiroshi’s death is something that could easily be dug into. Even if it’s not totally rational, because it doesn’t have to be because grief and emotions are not rational.

I mean, I doubt I need to get into the fact that Asami is once again sidelined in a plot that should be about her (the reconstruction effort was literally her thing between Books 3 and 4), since that one is just—it’s there. That’s what it is. Zhu Li gets it because she’s around, I guess? And because Raiko is a terrible President who needed to get ousted anyway (why is he not letting people get their food???), but why wouldn’t whatever theoretical legislature just impeach him while Korra and Asami were on vacation? What purpose does this narrative actually serve since we already don’t like Raiko and would want anyone in that position that isn’t him? Preferably someone who lost in the first round of elections—I’ll stop there. It just unfolds with the slightest tug.

SPEAKING OF DEAD PARENTS (perfect segue) remember when I reminded you that Asami’s mother was murdered by firebenders? After a break-in? When she was five? Wow that must have been pretty traumatizing for her considering it literally radicalized her father into becoming a genocidal maniac. Which, you know, makes it extremely strange that this isn’t brought up or addressed when Jargala and her crew do like, the same thing to Asami.

Wow that’s scary, isn’t it? Possibly PTSD flashback level scary, if Mike had remembered that important aspect of Asami’s history. Yet this is not brought up, and it doesn’t seem to inform Asami’s character at all despite the fact that it should probably be the second thing that comes out of her mouth when she discusses the encounter with Korra.

But wait, it happens again with Tokuga, who just ransacks her place, which just makes it worse. It’d be bad enough not to have Asami explicate this connection the first time around, because she could be bottling her emotions (she does that), and we find out about this later, but to do it twice in the same graphic novel? In quick succession? Yeah, Mike just plum forgot.

I don’t think I need to explain further why being lazy with a canon that you yourself poured your blood, sweat and tears into is not a great look. But that’s what the story Mike wrote is saying.

So, yeah, those are most of my issues with Turf Wars Part 2. Thanks for reading through to the end!

Other random thoughts on how none of this makes sense:

Why does Republic City have Kuvira’s military armaments in a warehouse? Even if the war is somehow over, which it can’t be because that’s not how anything works, it’s still Earth Empire property.

Why do any of those mecha-suits even work after Varrick’s EMP?

Why is Ba Sing Se offering relief efforts when that’s the capital of the country that just invaded the United Republic— seriously they’re still at war you guys you can’t just capture the enemy commander and win

How does Tokuga’s half-spirit form allow him to control spirits? Wouldn’t that make them hate him more?

Why do the triads agree to work under him when all he’s got is a tentacle arm? They could just set him on fire and be done with it

What is the point of Keum, like, at all? Why does he even exist? He got kidnapped at the end of Part 1, but we have no emotional stake in his existence

Why are Mako and Bolin relearning how to value one another’s different skill sets? This is like the fifth time or something

[coshayphinelove]

now that the finale afterglow has faded, i’ve been kind of looking back on the series with a more critical eye than a “PLS DONT LEAVE ME” eye.  

this is by no means the last time i’ll write some kind of long-winded essay, i’m sure i’ll find other things to overthink about on rewatches and as i write more fic, but it is a direct reaction to the finale and the five years i have spent with this show.

in short, the finale was amazing.  it was probably the best finale of any show i have ever seen.  it was satisfying and true to the characters that we had grown to love.  it was realistic insofar that the problems didn’t end with the evil being defeated.  it was bittersweet and made me emotional where i didn’t think the show could anymore.

(although i still haven’t watched the last two episodes of frin/ge so it’s rank may change).

if the rest of the season and the previous two seasons had set it up, it would have been even better.  it is, to this day, my firm opinion that season 1 was the tightest, most well thought out season of television i have ever seen.  like, if you had asked me in season 3 where i thought the finale would be, i would have had such a different answer.  (please do ask me, i have so many thoughts.)

most of my criticisms are on the co-phine/delphine front bc that’s where i’ve curated the most facts, having a few transcripts saved to my computer for ease of access.  and the first thing i have to talk about is the plot holes this season, bc wow, so many.  like, delphine was only there when it was convenient.  that much was clear.  

like she only helped siobhan bc there needed to be a good guy survivor to tell the rest about what happened.  she was only invited to the big house so cosima could invite herself along.  she was only put in the dress so that cosima could be in the suit so that the pr team could tease a wedding.

and she was only in the final clone scene to reinforce that ‘’we can trust her now guys’’.  like she and cosima never talked about anything.  not the shay snafu in season 3, not the lying, not the spying, not the secrets.  which are really big things.  and i’m not saying it had to be 45 minutes of therapy jargon but i am saying that they should’ve said... ‘sorry’ or explained what happened and where they were coming from.  bc to this day i don’t actually know why delphine did what she did in season 3.  what happened in frankfurt?  why did she threaten shay like that instead of just asking?  why was she suddenly working for topside?  none of that ever gets mentioned after it happens.

and as much as the sarah hug helps me with my sarcoshayphine struggles, they hadn’t spoken since ‘piss off delphine.’  how did they get from there to hugging?  ‘we’re doing all of this on account of bloody delphine?’ to soft hugs and kind words?  like yeah, it fit and it worked and it was touching.  but when you think about it, it kind of dissolves.  which is kinda fitting for a lot of the plot this season.

and to me, that left this season of c0p/hine feeling kind of empty.  we reused the ‘can we trust delphine’ plot.  we reused the ‘delphine’s off in a foreign country and therefore unreachable’ plot (eighty times this season, right?).  i still stand by my point that in season 4 she could have been in hiding, having driven off into the sunset to do mrs. s’s bidding.  like they could’ve had delphine funneling info for all of season 4 through mk/siobhan completely off screen.  but she just.. did nothing for all of season 4.  right.  boss ass bitch corporate delphine just... sat around getting told what to do... sure..

or in 5x09 she could have just been around the corner at the grocery store rather than france.  and why even bring that up if you’re never going to do anything with it?  she went home right when cosima would’ve needed her and she was free to be there for her?  what the hell?  and there was no setup for it either.  one second they’re ‘on the precipice of doing anything they want’ and the next delphine went home?  without cosima before the fight is over?  like, season 2 delphine would’ve been doing The Most: cooking, cleaning, grocery shopping, chores, snuggles, etc etc.  but instead she hears the news and hops on the first plane out of the country?

like you guys do realize they didn’t say ‘i love you’ this season at all, right?  delphine is ‘motivated by love’ but she doesn’t say it at every possible opportunity?  cosima thought she was dead, but doesn’t blurt it out the first time she sees her after waking up?  like fuck a sex scene, normalize wlw couples saying ‘i love you’ to each other first.

idk...  i know there were scheduling conflicts and i know they had to keep rewriting as the schedule got rearranged, but come on.  i can, right now, change a few key scenes that do something for both cosima and delphine’s character, that keeps them both active and doesn’t just ignore 3 seasons of characterization.

which is another point.  there was so much they could have done with delphine’s character.  not just this season, but for a while.  instead of like.. idk following up on the threads they presented (affair with l**kie, changing sides, the girl who slit her wrists which was implied to be delphine herself, seeming to be worth shooting and kidnapping and nursing to back to health to neolution, what she was doing before cosima got there, what she did in geneva, etc etc) they only brought her back to kiss cosima.  like bottom line.  like, she didn’t really do anything active that someone else wasn’t doing elsewhere except warn siobhan about kira.  which they didn’t even listen to her about.

and several times they referred to her as a lesbian when in 1x08 she clearly and fully called herself bisexual.  and they shot her.  for being in love with cosima.  regardless of what they have recently said about ‘knowing about byg and always intending to bring her back’ they... still did it.  and right afterwards said some really gross stuff about fans who were upset about it.  i don’t really remember all of it, but i do distinctly remember the word ‘reductive’ used to say that fans were reducing her to her sexuality and that was the real problem.  which... see the above several paragraphs.  pot, kettle.  kettle, pot.  (i have separate thoughts on the season 3 debacle..)

which brings me to my main thought.  i think they were too hyperaware of the fandom.  they tried to roll with the scheduling conflicts and make a nice new shiny ship for us.  but when there were complaints (*cough* hate *cough*) thrown at creators/cast over it they waffled and changed their minds.  which then led to a shay shaped plot hole.  also a shay shaped hole in my heart.

and i think someone around season 1 told them they were being progressive and they just... didn’t try to learn new things?  idk how to phrase this.  like season 1 was genuinely feminist.  and the fact that they saw this story unfolding from a female perspective was incredible.  and sarah’s storyline throughout the seasons was incredibly feminist.  and the fact that they thought to include characters of genders other than cis and sexualities other than straight was fantastic.  but after they got a pat on the back for being progressive, they stopped actively trying to call themselves out.  they were like, ‘yes i am progressive and feminist therefore everything i produce is good without a second check.’

but this past season was all about petey and the clones were only used to further reinforce his evilness.  and felix was more active than sarah, the protagonist.  and tony actually got mentioned but he never actually showed up.  and their ‘stand-in for the patriarchy’ got to violently murder two women (of two different underrepresented minorities, ASD and middle aged) while going back and abusing another woman (and praising him and saying he actually loved her!!!!).  and their lesbian character centric episode was primarily focused on her romantic entanglements rather than, say, her and her character.  (which i’ve been learning is actually kind of a problem in the wlw community, is losing yourself to new relationship energy and they could’ve actually taken a stance on this and said something important, but... anyway..)

and the creators were touting this as the most feminist season ever.

...

like okay.  by walking0 de..ad and game- of9 thro///nes standards it is.  but what they said in interviews and what they put on the screen did not match up.  and i think that’s my main problem.  like when i turn on my tv i generally turn off my feminism eyes and my lgbt rep wants.  bc i generally know that not every show is going to be perfect and as long as it’s not like last man standing then i can tolerate it.  but season 1 and their interview presence just got my hopes up.  and they just didn’t deliver on their promises, imo.

and that wouldn’t be so bad, but they were so close, like this close!!  you can’t see my fingers rn, but they’re almost touching...  like they had the perfect setup, a meatball straight down the plate, just begging to be a home run, but they shanked it to right field and got stopped at second base.

like implying in interviews that some characters are nonbinary or confirming characters sexualities is really cool!!! i used to be a r//izzl//es fan, i know how awful it is when cast/creators genuinely don’t want you in their fandom.  getting a confirmation is super cool.... but technically it’s not canon, it’s not In The Show.  like it’s not untrue either, it’s not not canon.  but being Progressive and Feminist and Positive LGBT Rep would’ve been.. idk saying it on the show, in the character’s own words?  bc i can go anywhere and get coded representation, i can go back to the fifties and watch stuff with thinly veiled metaphors and small little nudges in the confirmation direction.  it’s not something you get to pat yourself on the back for.

like, imo 1x08 was probably the best handled lgbt scene.  like delphine stated her identity.  and cosima just went along with it.  and they got to talk candidly about it.  they said ‘gay’ and ‘bisexual’ in the same scene.  like??!!?!??!?! that was amazing.  but for some reason they couldn’t do that for sarah, or felix.  or let tony talk about being trans rather than having it be a hushed whispered conversation between two (then believed to be) cis people without him.

and it was just so frustrating to me, as a viewer, knowing what they meant and seeing what they put out there.  

bc they are two different things.  i can say whatever i want about this post, but at the end of the day it is just a grammatically incorrect, rambling, walk-about way of saying i have insomnia and was thinking about this enough to try and organize my thoughts.  the creators can say whatever they want about the show, but eventually those interviews and those panels will get buried in the internet and all that will stand is their product.  which doesn’t have confirmations of those themes within it.

like i’m forever going to love the show and i’m always going to go back and rewatch.  it’s always going to be an influence on my writing.  it’s just not... me trying to replicate and be like this show it’s trying not to make the same mistakes.  which is kinda sad, bc it used to be the other way.  

and at the end of the day it is feminist.  like it’s about women told from a women’s perspective about allegories for womens’ issues.  it’s just not by women so it missed the mark.  same goes for the lgbt stuff.  it is progressive that they thought to include it, but the stories they ended up telling were closer to the older stuff than what they thought.  

i just wish they had brought in a third showrunner that was a woman and had lgbt writers come in to tell the lgbt stories.  that doesn’t mean that it would’ve automatically been 100% Unproblematic™ but i think it would have been a lot closer to what they had promised.

anyway, i miss it already.

[darkershining]

DarkerShining’s thoughts on the Pretty Cure Movies: Futari wa Pretty Cure Splash Star: Tic-Tac Crisis Hanging by a Thin Thread.

Hey everyone! Since I had some spare time and was having trouble making progress on my fanfic stuff, I decided why not do another one of these. This time, I’ll be talking about the Futari wa Pretty Cure Splash Star movie. It’s a bit shorter than the other movies in the Pretty Cure franchise, for some reason.

Like I did when I did my thoughts on the two Futari wa Pretty Cure Max Heart movies, I rewatched it and took some notes underway so I’d remember anything I might want to bring up.

And just to warn you, I will basically be spoiling the entire movie under the Read More link, with some spoilers for Splash Star in general as well. Okay, let’s go!

Plot:

The story begins with Saki being late for a meeting with Mai due to oversleeping, as the two of them have entered a karaoke contest. While waiting for Saki to show up, Mai notices a nearby clock store and decides to take a look, taking an interest in an old grandfather clock. Saki eventually makes it to the meeting place, but can’t find Mai. She eventually heads to the clock store to confirm the time, and meets up with Mai. The two don’t have time to discuss the situation as they’ll be late for the contest.

The opening credits play as the two try to get to the contest, Saki eventually suggesting a shortcut. However, while taking said shortcut, they come across a mysterious man who asks if they know where the oldest clock in the area can be found. Mai realizes he must mean the old grandfather clock, and Saki gives him directions to the clock store. Flappy and Choppy briefly sense a negative energy, but as it came and went so quickly, the girls decide to just keep running to make it to the contest.

The mystery man reaches the clock, and opens a portal to The Land of Clocks.

Saki and Mai have just missed the deadline for registering for the contest, but manage to convince the people there to let them in anyways. Saki is relieved they made it in time, but Mai reminds her that they didn’t actually make in time and the judges just let them in to be nice, and that Saki should’ve made sure to make it on time since entering the contest was her idea. They get into a small argument as Saki explains why she was late and Mai explains that she only left the meeting place for a few minutes. Kenta shows up and wonders if something is wrong, but the girls insist everything is fine. Kenta reminds the two that they must have harmony if they’re going to sing together, and wishes them luck.

While the guest judges for the contest are giving a speech, Saki and Mai get into their goofy animal costumes to prepare for their number, but both are visibly troubled by what happened earlier. When it is time for them to get on the stage, both are suddenly struck with stage fright and wish time would stop.

Time does just that.

The girls wonder what just happened, and why they and their fairies are the only ones unaffected. Saki wonders if it might be an Uzaina’s doing, but Flappy and Choppy don’t sense any nearby. Saki tries to lighten the mood by jokingly bringing up all the possibilities of everyone else being frozen in time, but Mai isn’t in the mood for such jokes. Flappy and Choppy wonder why the girls aren’t getting along as well as they usually do.

Two other fairies resembling a turtle and a rabbit are suddenly thrown out through the large clock. As they both hurry back to the clock store, the girls follow the two in hopes of getting some answers. The fairies head back through the portal, which sucks in the girls and their fairies as well. The two new fairies are surprised to have company, but don’t dwell on it for long as they need to get back to the Infinite Clock.

The girls learn how the Infinite Clock in the Land of Clocks keeps all time moving, but the hourglass will soon run out of sand if they don’t do anything about it. The turtle and rabbit introduce themselves as Hours and Minutes, but don’t seem to agree on what their team name is. The villain, the mysterious man from earlier, shows up, surprised to see Hours and Minutes back so soon after he threw them out into the Land of Greenery.

He introduces himself as Sirloin, a villain from Dark Fall. When he sees that Saki and Mai are clearly familiar with Dark Fall, he realizes they must be the Pretty Cures. Saki and Mai realize they messed up when they gave Sirloin the directions to the clock store, but can’t seem to agree on which of them was the most at fault. Flappy and Choppy remind them it doesn’t matter, since there’s a villain to fight.

Sirloin reveals he intends to let the sand in the hourglass on the Infinite Clock run out so time will stop permanently, so that he can have everything to himself in a world of complete silence. Saki and Mai are of course not okay with this, and transform into Cure Bloom and Cure Egret. They fight against Sirloin, but with the two of them out of sync, they are soon overpowered. Hours and Minutes try to intervene, but Sirloin simply traps everyone inside a purple void inside his suitcase.

Cure Bloom, Cure Egret, Flappy, Choppy, Hours and Minutes find themselves trapped in a large maze, with Sirloin claiming it’s an endless maze that they’ll never escape from. Cure Bloom remains optimistic, and says that since there was a way in, there must also be a way out. So, they begin searching for a way out. However, Moop and Foop have been separated from the rest of the group. They happen to come across the Clock Spirits, whom Sirloin had also imprisoned after removing them from the Infinite Clock.

As the Cures’ group continue exploring the labyrinth for a while, Cure Bloom starts to become discouraged and wonders if there even is an exit, causing Cure Egret to point out that Cure Bloom was the one who said there had to be one. Cure Bloom is worried about Moop and Foop and wants to find them first, while Cure Egret thinks they should continue focusing on finding the exit.

After a brief argument on the subject, Cure Bloom starts to walk away in frustration. However, an Uzaina suddenly appears and attacks Cure Egret. Cure Bloom hurries back, but Cure Egret is no where to be seen. The Uzaina knocks Cure Bloom along with Flappy and Hours away, while Cure Egret, Choppy and Minutes get trapped behind a door and transported to a different area.

Cure Bloom wonders if her low spirit power is because they’re in a different world, but Flappy reminds her how much of the Pretty Cures’ power comes from their bond, and while they’re separated, their power weakens. Worried about their friends, but lacking the resolve to keep going and blaming themselves for the current situation, Cure Bloom and Cure Egret’s transformations wear off. While the two of them are having their Heroic BSOD, Sirloin talks about his plans and how he looks forward to total silence.

Flappy eventually talks some sense into Saki, as does Hours who is worried about Minutes. Choppy and Minutes do the same for Mai. The two girls eventually resolve to find the other and sort things out. Saki calls out for Mai, and her voice manages to reach Mai in the distance. Mai calls out for Saki, and soon the two begin hurrying to where the other is. Moop, Foop and the Clock Spirits also hear their voices, and begin making their way towards the sound.

Saki and Mai finally reunite, but nearly fall, only to be saved by the Clock Spirits. The Uzaina reappears, and the leaves on its head fall off to reveal a door. They realize the door might be the exit to the labyrinth. Saki has the Clock Spirits carry her to the door, but Saki is unable to open it on her own. Mai eventually drops down and helps her open the door, and together they manage to free everyone from the labyrinth within Sirloin’s suitcase, much to his shock.

Hours, Minutes and the Clock Spirits immediately start heading back to the Infinite Clock to prevent time from stopping, with Flappy, Choppy, Moop and Foop trying to stop Sirloin from stopping them from doing so. However, Sirloin traps the Cures and their fairies in a pillar of sand to stop them from interfering any more.

Saki and Mai apologize to each other, holding hands. They gradually transform into their Cure Bright and Cure Windy forms as they reaffirm their friendship. They soon escape the sand pillar, leading to Pretty Cures VS Sirloin part two. This time, with their spirit power fully restored, the Cures are the one who get the upper hand. However, Sirloin doesn’t go down that easily, and takes on a stronger form for the third round.

Even so, Cure Bright and Cure Windy refuse to give in, since everyone’s futures are at stake. They charge up for a Spiral Star Splash, with Hours and Minutes giving them some additional power. The Cures fight against Sirloin, give the obligatory speech on teamwork and protecting the futures of everyone. We get some epic visuals as the Infinite Clock resonates with the Cures, causing some sort of spirits based on the Eastern Zodiac to appear and join in on the final attack, defeating Sirloin.

With the Infinite Clock fixed, the Cures bid their new friends good-bye. Time is moving again, and Saki and Mai find themselves back on the stage for the contest, and they perform the ending theme.

The Characters

All right, let’s talk about the movie exclusive characters, Hours, Minutes and Sirloin. The Clock Spirits are essentially just like the spirits of the different Fountains that the girls rescue throughout the series, except that they look like different clock parts, so there’s not really much to say about them.

Hours is the more temperamental of the two fairies from the Land of Clocks, being quick to show his frustration with Minutes. However, when they’re separated, he openly shows concern for his companion. So, I guess he’s basically a tsundere towards Minutes.

Minutes is the more laid-back of the two, and even while separated, doesn’t lose his cool and is certain that Hours is out looking for him, showing that he clearly knows how his partner really feels.

I like how their moments with Saki and Mai highlights the different aspects of their personalities and how close these two fairies really are, even if they don’t always get along. Their designs are cute too.

Sirloin’s design is pretty cool, and I do wonder how he managed to get an entire labyrinth into that suitcase of his. Regardless, what’s really interesting about him is how his goal is pretty similar to Gooyan’s in some aspects. Both of them desired a world of total silence, although their exact idea of what this entails and their methods for carrying out their goal is quite different. While Gooyan intended to destroy the entire world, Sirloin sought to stop time. Of course, neither of them stood a chance once the Pretty Cures got involved.

My thoughts on the story

It’s not really the best of the Pretty Cure movies, but for what it is, it’s okay. Since Saki and Mai are usually getting along pretty well in the series itself, some might find their conflict throughout the movie to be a bit out-of-character for them. I guess both of them being a bit stressed about the karaoke contest in the beginning might’ve played into that, though.

The movie has some nice visuals, such as the design of the Infinite Clock, Saki and Mai’s gradual transformation into their Cure Bright and Cure Windy forms just before the climax, and the end of the final battle against Sirloin. Cure Bright and Cure Windy didn’t actually get a new form for the final battle as Pretty Cures tend to get in the movies, though.

If I were to make a guess about where in the timeline the movie takes place, I’d guess sometime before Michiru and Kaoru were rescued, since neither of them appear in the movie. Other than that, all I can tell is that it takes place during the second half of the show.

So, yeah. It’s an okay movie, I guess. Not much else to say. Maybe I’ll have more to say about the next movie I talk about. Next time, I’ll probably talk about the Yes! Pretty Cure 5 movie, The Mirror Kingdom’s Miraculous Adventure!

[elizabethrobertajones]

Yesterday I finally caught up with probably half of Tumblr and finished watching Sense8 (*hugs my new Netflix account*)... 

I really enjoyed it and I guess it lives up to the hype, though waiting forever to watch it kind of took the edge off, since I was curious enough to examine every gifset on my dash for the last... couple of years? since it appeared. I really like how everyone’s so in love with the characters and their dynamics that despite learning a great deal about almost every character and their relationships, I 1: didn’t even know Naveen Andrews was in it and 2: had no idea what the main plot was and assumed it was mostly just a great big action/romance romp with random soulmate dynamics thrown in to spice it up. :P 

And it’s brilliant as a soap opera ignoring the main plot, as several characters have pretty much nothing to do with it (yet? I started off trying to analyse the plot and linked up Capheus, Kala and Sun as the most important players in an epic biomedical scandal involving the businesses and such they’re tied up in that must surely link further back to all the sinister stuff with the real bad guys, and then of course nothing’s come of that yet in a season + Christmas special...) and definitely one of its main strengths is the characters and their relationships and interactions, especially as with so many ways to sort them, and some plots with a lot of one on one cross over, characters you’d come to know and love were still meeting each other for the first time fairly late on. 

Anyway, Daryl Hannah floating around being the fridged woman with a remarkable resemblance to Mary Winchester aside (I feel so sorry for actresses whose entire role is wearing a dirty/bloodstained nightgown while making spooky appearances for the sake of the main characters :P) the actual plot seems like Orphan Black in many respects, and the more I think about it the more connections I make, aside from the obvious of Weird Science bothering a group of seemingly normal people who then discover they’re actually clones/soulmates with a whole bunch of other people they have uncanny connections to. By the end of the current season of Orphan Black, our protagonist clone is even having sustained visions of the clone who started the series with the suicide of one of their own who, like Daryl Hannah, kicked off the entire plot for the main characters, and her daughter seems to be psychically connecting to the other clones through the same Weird Science as Sense8. There’s a strong focus on life and death and altogether too much childbirth stuff on screen :P

I think Sense8′s advantage is that it’s much less confined by the format not just that it can be absolutely openly as diverse as it wants to be, but because without having to be somewhat procedural or else fitting the regular format of TV shows, you can get the really long, weird sequences which aren’t really doing anything except quiet, meaningful stretches of character stuff. There are story arcs per episode, but the entire thing moves incredibly slowly. I swear Orphan Black made the same progress through the plot in a handful of episodes as Sense8 has done so far in its entire run. 

Obviously neither show is finished yet, and in several important respects Sense8 blows Orphan Black out of the water, with OB being included in the great Onscreen Queer Women Massacre of the start of the year it only just bought my interest but not my trust back by backpeddaling that... and even if they always intended to bring said murdered queer woman back, they’ve not allowed the couple in question to just exist happily and unapologetically, and inflicted that trope on us in the first place... they also DID apologise while at the same time doing it, admitted they were aware they should use a trans actor to play a trans character but because of the clone thing, still used Tatiana to play a surprise brother clone they threw in for one episode basically, I guess, to show something about variation etc, and at this point I don’t know if it’s for the best he’s not in a ton of episodes, although weird they never mention him again after that. 

Sense8 has a much clearer sense of these issues, though its attempt to portray a broad stroke of human existence world wide has netted it a lot of criticism for stereotyping & racist tropes in those portrayals, which I’m not equipped to comment on, but as someone who wearily watches a lot of media, certainly none of the non-western, white, stories felt particularly unexpected or not like something I could see elsewhere... Orphan Black has mostly stayed clear of those issues by just not going near them; the actual cast when you narrow it down away from the character list is still very white. Throw in the dozens of versions of Tatiana and the other clone guy and they’ve got endless room to add in as many more characters as they like, obviously all versions of the same white actors dressed up differently.

... in any case, Sense8′s plot gave me a fair amount of deja vu to the show I’d already watched, but because OB put me off several times (and yet I kept coming back to it :P) I don’t have a very clear memory of the first season’s plot to make a stronger side by side comparison. I’m mostly intrigued by the sense of the huge terrifying rich biotech and medical corporations, doing Weird Science juuust beyond the range of what we can understand now, or with a slight science-fantasy element to it, relying on real world conspiracies or Fortean Times level suspicions of what might possibly be real if you wanted to believe tales of precognition, telepathy, etc. In Sense8 there’s a few mentions of ~real~ stories of such things, but I can’t remember if OB went over it yet. 

Certainly in both there’s a sense of unity and impossible but unbreakable family bonds, and a lot of exploration of who the Self is vs these huge faceless corporations. OB cycles through several villains or weird cults and such as the bad guys, each one in turn unknowable but powerful or embedded in a way with science or military or religious connections that make them dangerous to go up against. It’s hard to tell exactly what message Sense8 has about it because so much less plot involving it has unfurled but it’s obviously not good news with the big corporations, definitions of humanity, and secret conspiracy to police what is human and what is not. It even sets the entire viewing audience against the Sensates as part of a mass of non-sensate people who lack the emotional connection and empathy to feel like they do, implying the whole lot of us are murderous and cold as a result... In this way the evil scientists out to get them are only the very personal version of ALL the struggles they face, represented by that moment in the Xmas special where they all see the writing on the wall at Lito’s house transform into the worst things they have been called. 

It takes a much colder view of humanity, making it us or them, and for us, switching which of those groups we identify with by way of sympathy to the main characters. OB is less personal in that way but focuses on the dangers of science trying to create a better human, and while the clones are supposedly all “improved” humans, they have enough flaws, physically and emotionally (although yikes, Krystal makes me sure they have latent super soldier genes none of the others have properly unlocked except maybe the unkillable Helena :P) that they don’t come across as totally othered for more than the unfortunate circumstances of their births they obviously didn’t ask for. Rachel as the only one raised in the know ends up the most dangerous of them all, perhaps for having her sense of humanity denied to her and knowing for most of her life that she was only an experiment and property of the company. What makes the rest of humans human isn’t in question so much as how much the clones might belong with humanity, and that they could grow up oblivious and fit in emotionally, and still have human values even when they discover they’re “only” property and experimental prototypes who’ve been living almost Truman show lives. In that respect, Sarah as the narrator is the most free and human because she was raised outside of the program with no influence from it whatsoever - narratively it’s not coincidental that she and Helena are also the only clones who are fertile and can have children.

... I’ve been making connections all day but this post is really long now so I’m going to stop here. I want to rewatch Orphan Black now, since I noticed it on the Netflix menu and I’m having a bit of a cackling wildly, world at my fingertips moment here. :P