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#it's very funny honestly I'm just out here
gotham--fc · 1 day
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Rivals - A Jessie Fleming Imagine
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Request: Jessie and R both play at UCLA but R plays for the US national team and the media invents a rivalry between them, both Jessie and R get annoyed at being constantly asked about their 'rivalry', they both talk to each other about it and confess their feelings
A/N: I will probably even less active than I am now (if that's possible) I just started school again and I'm very stressed and booked n busy
“So Jessie,” The reporter began. Jessie looked over to where she heard him speak. “You’re about to start at UCLA after these Olympics, and I’m sure you know, but American player Y/N Y/L/N committed to UCLA as well. Do you think your rivalry with her will effect team dynamics at UCLA?”
Jessie really hated media. She was an introvert at heart and if she had it her way, the media wouldn’t be allowed with 500 feet of the team after a game. They weren’t even scheduled to play the US this tournament unless they both made the finals. Still, all they want to ask is about Jessie’s ‘rivalry’ with Y/N. Jessie doesn’t have a rivalry with anyone, and she hasn’t met Y/N off the field even once. They don’t even really interact on the field when they do play, so Jessie has no idea where the ‘rivalry’ theory came from. Except that they’re both the youngest members of their teams, the same age, both midfielders.
“I don’t think that’s going to effect the team at all,” Jessie says, “I have nothing but respect for her as a player and I think she’s a really strong midfielder and she’s very skilled, so I’m confident that we’re both going to play important roles at UCLA and I’m just excited to get started.”
“You might end up facing the US in the finals, the US obviously are the reigning gold medalists, is that something you and the team are thinking about?”
“Not really,” Jessie said honestly, “That’s not our focus right now because nothing is guaranteed, so our focus right now is on our next game. We put ourselves in a good spot coming out of the group stage, uh, in first place, so we’re just focused on the quarterfinal games.”
***
“Y/N, your focus is obviously on winning gold, but can I ask how you’re feeling about joining UCLA this fall?”
“Yeah,” Y/N says, “I’m thrilled to be joining UCLA and I’m excited to further my development as a player and hopefully help the team win a championship.”
Y/N doesn’t really understand why they always ask her to do media. She doesn’t believe anyone really wants to hear from her over some of the vets. But still, here she is, trying not to pull her hair out at these stupid questions.
“Jessie Fleming is also joining UCLA this year, have you spoken to her at all? We know you two have a sort of on field rivalry, have you spoken to her about the both of you joining UCLA?”
“No, we’ve never really crossed paths outside the field, so I haven’t spoken to her. She’s a great player, though, and I think she’ll be an important part of the team at UCLA.”
***
A lot of the players at UCLA are roommates. Even the freshman in their dorms tend to get paired up with someone from the team.  Jessie ends up rooming with Teagan Micah, a keeper from Australia. Jessie likes her, she’s funny, and she’s pretty outgoing, so she drags Jessie along to frosh week activities and Jessie knows if she was left alone she would’ve spent the entirety of her first weeks at school either in class, at practice, or at home.
They have their first practice pretty soon after they move in, since the season starts up right away. The first practice is mostly getting to know each other and the coaches and the style of play they want. It’s different than how Canada plays, so it takes Jessie a second to adjust.
After practice, one of the senior girls calls the team over. She invites everyone to a team bonding night at her place that night.
Jessie gets ready in her dorm with Teagan. Jessie wants to leave so they’ll arrive a bit early, but Teagan just laughs at her, and tells her if a party starts at 8pm, people won’t arrive until 9pm. Jessie wants to say it’s not a party, it’s just for the team to get to know each other, but she doesn’t.
Turns out, it’s a party.
Not only is the soccer team there, but so is the basketball team, the football team, teams that Jessie can’t recognize. She stays near Teagan most of the night, not feeling the most comfortable with the loud music, the drinking, the number of people crammed in a tiny living room. Jessie loses track of Teagan after someone bumps into her, then someone steps in between her and Teagan. Instead of continuing to struggle through people to find Teagan, Jessie goes into the kitchen which is mercifully less full.
Jessie grabs a clean cup and fills it with water from the sink. She hears a commotion and turns, seeing Y/N with a small group enter the kitchen. They make eye contact, and Jessie waves. Y/N nods in acknowledgement. The group begins yelling about shots, and Jessie takes that as her cue to leave. She tries to find Teagan, but it’s impossible, and instead she finds Hallie Mace.
“Hallie!” Jessie yells over the music, “Can you tell Teagan I left? In case she wonders where I went?”
“Yeah, sure Jessie,” Hallie says, “Are you having fun?”
Jessie smiles and nods, and she knows it looks forced, but it satisfies Hallie, who Jessie figures is a little tipsy.
Jessie makes her way outside and walks home, the cool air a relief after how hot it was inside.
Jessie is asleep by the time Teagan comes home, and either Teagan was really quiet, or Jessie was really asleep, because Jessie didn’t hear her come in. The only sign that Teagan did come home is Teagan sleeping in her bed in the clothes she wore last night, hair sticking up in all directions. Jessie sets some Gatorade and Advil on the nightstand for her before she leaves for class.
***
It’s not that Y/N is intentionally avoiding Jessie.
There is truly no bad blood or actual rivalry or whatever people want to believe. It’s just that there’s not much overlap between them except on the field. They’re not in the same program, so they don’t share classes together, they don’t really share the same friends, outside the team. Y/N is friends with the people in her class, other student athletes, and Jessie is friends with people from her classes, and the soccer team. Y/N doesn’t even really notice it, until the online comments start.
It starts with a clip from one of their games. Jessie and Y/N were both on the bench, after being subbed out, and Jessie sat after grabbing water and her pinny, and Y/N stayed standing.
omg they haaate each other
they won’t even sit together its so over
LMAO Y/N really can’t stand Canadians there’s miles of space on that bench to sit and she STANDS???
Y/N frowns when she sees it. It wasn’t intentional, she wasn’t not sitting because she didn’t want to sit with Jessie. She prefers standing for a bit after she’s subbed out. It’s a mini cool down, and she likes bringing her heartrate down before she sits and fully relaxes.
Then it’s the clip from the Olympics, when Y/N said she doesn’t talk to Jessie. All Y/N meant by that is that they hadn’t crossed paths, through no fault of theirs, it’s just how things happened. Of course, everyone decided she meant that she refuses to talk to Jessie.
There’s rumours on campus about a bad fight the two had, about how they played against each other with their national teams and after they got into it off the field. Another lie, because they’ve truly never encountered each other after a game. Still, some of Y/N’s new friends ask her about it, ask her what Jessie did, what really went down. Y/N tells them the same thing each time, nothing happened, there’s no hatred or rivalry, they’re simply two people whose lives don’t really overlap and that’s all there is.
***
USA and Canada don’t even play each other at the next FIFA window. The US plays in the SheBelieves Cup and Canada plays in the Algarve Cup. All Jessie wants to do is focus on the games. She can’t, however, because the first media appearance she does, the first question is about Y/N.
“She’s a great player,” Jessie says, “She brings a lot to the team and I’m happy that for most of the time she’s on my team and not playing against me.”
It doesn’t help that her teammates bother her about it too.
“How is it really?” Janine asks, “Does the team have to build a barrier between you guys?”
“Janine,” Jessie sighs, “We don’t hate each other. We’re literally normal teammates.”
“Oh, come on, you won’t even tell me the juicy details?” Janine whines, “I’m your best friend!”
“Beckie, leave her alone,” Sophie Schmidt says. Jessie almost thanks Sophie, then Sophie keeps talking. “Jessie doesn’t want to spend her rare time away from her enemy thinking about her.”
“She’s not my enemy!” Jessie snaps, “You guys suck.”
***
“Sooooo…” Kelley slides in next to Y/N at the lunch table. “How are things at school?”
“Good?” Y/N says, “Why?”
“I’m just wondering!” Kelley says, “I want to make sure you’re handling things, you know, balancing school with soccer, all those things.”
“Yeah, it’s good. I’m good.”
“Aaand the team is good?”
“Why are you being so weird?” Y/N says.
“I’m not! Alex, am I being weird?” Kelley yells over at Alex across the room.
“You usually are,” Alex comes over and joins them at the table, “What are you being weird about now Kel?”
“I’m just asking her how school is!” Kelley insists. Alex rolls her eyes.
“Kelley wants to ask how Jessie Fleming is, but she’s trying to be subtle about it.”
“Alex!”
“Jessie is fine,” Y/N interrupts before the two can start bickering.
“Do you guys get along?” Kelley asks.
“Yeah, we’re fine,” Y/N sighs, “Are you seriously talking about that stupid rivalry thing? That’s just a bunch of BS.”
“Do you guys hang out? Are you friends?”
“Oh my god,” Y/N groans, “Can’t I eat without everyone bringing up Jessie? They’re not even in the same tournament as us, can I not get a fucking break?”
Kelley and Alex share a look.
***
It only gets worse from there. As Canada and the US start playing each other more, and the longer Jessie and Y/N play together at UCLA, and seemingly don’t get along, the more they get asked about it, the more comments are made online, the more frustrated Y/N gets.
Y/N sludges through the mud on her way to practice. It’s been unexpectedly rainy the past few days. Y/N thought LA was supposed to be hot and sunny all year round, and she thought she would spend her days basking in the sun, wearing suntan lotion and getting tan, not stepping in mud and puddles. When she gets to the field, she’s surprised the only other person there is Jessie.
“Am I really late or really early?” Y/N asks.
“I was asking myself the same thing,” Jessie says, “I’m always early but usually the coaches are already here.”
Y/N sets her bag down on the least muddy spot, and shakes her head.
“I thought LA was supposed to be sunny,” Y/N says. Jessie laughs.
“The rain is actually a relief for me,” Jessie says, “There’s not this much sun in Canada, I’m not used to it.”
Y/N laughs. Of course the Canadian likes the rain.
“I’m not surprised no one else showed up,” Y/N says, “The field is a bit waterlogged.” Y/N points down at her feet, her cleats sunk an inch into the mud.
“You can leave if you want,” Jessie says, “I’m gonna stay and run around for a bit, but you don’t have to stay if you’d rather get out of the mud.”
Y/N considers it. She would really like to go back to her dorm and take a hot shower. But she thinks of Jessie, here all alone, and she can’t leave.
“No, I’ll stay, might as well get some work in for the game this weekend.”
Y/N thinks Jessie means she’s going to stay and run drills, so Y/N waits for her to be ready to warm up. She’s too focused on the way her cleats are getting caked in mud to notice the mischievous smile on Jessie’s face. Y/N gasps and jumps back as a wad of mud hits her chest. She looks at Jessie who’s laughing.
“Oh, it’s on.”
Y/N pounces before Jessie can run, tackling her into the mud. They roll around until they’re both covered in mud and laughing so hard their sides hurt. They run around, trying to push each other into puddles. After a bit, Y/N suggests they play 1 on 1 against each other to ‘see who’s really the better midfielder’. They go back and forth a bit, and the score remains even, both equally matched. It goes until Jessie’s up by one, having stripped the ball from Y/N on defense. Jessie dribbles up to Y/N and Y/N knows immediately that she made a mistake, committing too far one way and Jessie easily goes the other. She does it without thinking, one second watching Jessie cut the other way and the next she has her arms around Jessie’s waist, pulling her back until the two of them are tripping backwards into the mud.
Jessie sputters, mouth gaping open.
“That’s a foul! That’s a red!”
“There’s no refs!” Y/N says, “No refs, no rules! We’re tied again, you didn’t get past me.”
“We are not tied! That doesn’t count!” Jessie says, “I had you beat! I fooled you so bad you had to foul me to stop me!”
“What foul? I didn’t hear a foul call,” Y/N knows she’s being annoying, but she refuses to concede the point. “The rules were you had to get past me, and you didn’t get past me. You lost the ball, therefore, my point.”
“You little…”
Before Y/N can react, Jessie is up and running to the ball. She starts dribbling it away from Y/N.
“There! I recovered the ball and got past you! My point!”
“Get back here!” Y/N chases after her.
Y/N runs after Jessie, yelling the whole time, with Jessie yelling back at her. Y/N almost has her, has her fingers in Jessie’s jersey, ready to give it a tug back, and she startles to a stop when a voice rings out.
“You know practice was canceled today, right?” Teagan stands on the edge of the field.
“We sort of figured that,” Y/N says, out of breath.
“Are the two of you going to clean up before team dinner, or is being covered in the mud the new style?”
“I forgot about dinner,” Jessie says, “We should go shower. It’s going to take a while to get all this mud off.”
“And who’s fault is that?” Y/N yells after them as they walk away.
***
They don’t necessarily start hanging out after that. They still exist in different circles, but it’s more like they partner up in practice, or sit together at team meals, or Y/N plops into the seat behind Jessie on the bus.
Comments start to swirl again after one of their games against USC. USC is one of their biggest rivals and the stands are always packed, each team fighting for a win. UCLA pulled out the win, thanks to a goal from Jessie. Jessie gets pulled into an on field interview after the game and Y/N sneaks up behind her and dumps her almost full Gatorade on Jessie’s head.
“I’ll get you back for that!” Jessie yells, before clearly remembering she’s in the middle of an interview. “Sorry,” Jessie says, “What was the question?”
The clip circulates, people asking if they’ve squashed their beef, if it’s all for show, or if they’re really friends. Y/N rolls her eyes at all the comments.
They end up playing against each other with their national teams in a friendly. While in the tunnel waiting to head out on the field, Y/N finds where Jessie’s standing in line.
“Psst, Fleming,” Y/N gets her attention, “Can I get your jersey after the game?”
“Sure,” Jessie says, “But I don’t want yours. I’d rather die than wear American colours.”
Y/N sticks her tongue out at Jessie, but smiles when Jessie has to turn away to keep from laughing. She catches Kelley staring at her, raising her eyebrows. What? Y/N mouths at her. Kelley raises her arms in surrender and focuses back at the front.
After the game Y/N and Jessie meet in the middle of the field. Y/N already has her jersey off. She holds it out to Jessie.
“The whole point of a jersey swap is the swapping of jerseys, now give.”
Jessie rolls her eyes and pulls off her jersey, handing it to Y/N. They put on the others jersey and Jessie makes a face.
“This feels illegal.”
“Let’s take a photo,” Y/N drags Jessie over to the nearest photographer. She’s more than happy to get one of the two of them in each other’s jerseys and promises to send it to both of them.
***
After the game, a lot of the teams plan to meet up since a lot of them are friends and teammates on their club teams. Jessie isn’t 21 yet, and she really doesn’t know anyone on the US team very well, so she stays behind. She should probably do some homework anyway.
Jessie’s finished showering and doing her post game routine and about to pull out her textbooks, when there’s a knock at the door.
“Hey,” Y/N says when Jessie opens the door, “Everyone’s out drinking, except us it seems. Wanna hang?”
Y/N doesn’t wait for an answer before she pushes into the room and flops on the closest bed.
“That’s Janine’s bed,” Jessie says as she closes the door. Y/N groans and moves to the other bed.
“It’s so lame being under 21,” Y/N says, “Everyone ditches us to go to bars and stuff.”
“I don’t like bars anyway,” Jessie says, “I’d rather stay in.”
“I don’t mind staying in, I guess, I like hanging out with you, I’ll skip the bar if you’re here.”
Jessie doesn’t answer, looking away before Y/N can see how her cheeks grow red.
“Did you see this?” Y/N turns her phone to Jessie, “People are going crazy over the picture of us from the game. They’re trying to prove it’s a PR stunt since we tooootally hate each other.”
“All that rivalry stuff is pretty stupid. There was never anything to it.”
“You know everyone wants to create drama when there isn’t any.”
“I never…” Jessie turns to look at the wall, talking quietly, “I never had any problem with you, even before we became friends. I hated the rivalry crap. I always thought… I thought you were cool and I wanted to talk to you, but I thought you might’ve really hated me.”
“I didn’t hate you,” Y/N says, “Jess.” Jessie hears Y/N shifting on the bed and Y/N gently grabs Jessie’s shoulder and turns Jessie to face her. “I didn’t hate you, I thought you were cool too. You’re such a good player and everyone liked you so much. I didn’t know what to say to you.”
“I don’t think I’m that cool,” Jessie mutters.
“You’re way cool!” Y/N says, “You’re one of the best midfielders in the world and you’re still in college! And your photography stuff is really good, and everyone likes you, and, I think you’re really awesome Jess.”
Jessie feels like she might cry, and she doesn’t want to. She doesn’t want Y/N to see her cry, she doesn’t want to try to explain why a few nice words from Y/N are making her cry. She panics, because she can feel the tears coming and she doesn’t know how to stop it. Y/N is looking at her intently, and Jessie stops thinking. Before she knows it, her lips are on Y/N’s. She pulls back almost as quickly as she leaned in.
“I’m so sorry,” Jessie says. She feels like she might cry even more now.
“Oh,” Y/N breathes, “Oh. I didn’t realize…”
“I’m so sorry. I get it if you don’t want hang out with me anymore. I’m so sorry.”
Jessie keeps apologizing, not able to do anything else. She’s expecting Y/N to slap her, or to just walk out of the room and never talk to her again. She wonders how easy it is to transfer schools, she doesn’t want to leave UCLA, but she doesn’t know if she can face Y/N again. Lost in her thoughts, she freezes when Y/N kisses her again.
“Sorry,” Y/N says, “But I didn’t know how else to get to you to stop apologizing. I’m not mad, I like you too. I didn’t think you liked me back, so I didn’t say anything. I like you, Jess.”
“Really?” Jessie asks, “You… you like me?” Y/N nods. “I-I like you too,” Jessie says shyly.
Jessie covers her face and falls back on the bed. Y/N laughs and follows her. When Jessie uncovers her face, Y/N is facing her, looking at her with a soft smile on her face. Jessie takes a deep breath and works up her nerve. She reaches a hand out and slides her hand over Y/N’s. Y/N grins and laces their fingers together. Hours later, they fall asleep like that, hands clasped between them, and Jessie wakes up to the sound of a camera shutter.
“Sorry, didn’t mean to wake you,” Janine whispers, “I felt like we needed photo evidence of this moment.”
“Please don’t post that anywhere,” Jessie says, and she rolls over and falls back asleep.
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People asking which one we get between Jack Skellington and Oogie Boogie, while I'm sitting here in a Comm class thinking "Why not both? Lmao". We all recognize them easily, so having it a twist(heh) of both, with Jack's being a hero character and Oogie being the main bad, could work out with how they actually are.
How Yana could go about it, idk, we'll have to wait and see. But honestly, am so fucking hyped for it. But what exactly do you think could be a possible plot idea or what do you think could happen in the event?
You can answer at your own leisure.
[Referencing this post!]
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I don’t think it’s strange at all that people are speculating which character will be the one twisted. Yes, Fellow and Gidel were introduced as a pair, meaning that there is no limit or precedent set for there only be one new character revealed. However, it’s very clear that Fellow was the star of the show, as he has the stronger presence (and ended up getting the SSR as well). Ultimately, it does mean they end up being treated like a single character rather than individuals anyway. So really, I think most fans are still running on the logic that only “one” can be twisted.
The problem with Jack and Oogie is that they are both strong presences, neither dominating the other when it comes to being attention grabbing. Fellow and Gidel go together, but Jack and Oogie are opposing forces, not teammates, in their own story. This makes it hard to predict which of them will be twisted and makes it less likely they’d be crammed into the same card.
(ncbsbsvwjwheisn NOT GONNA LIE, I’m really hyped for a twisted!Jack Skellington… but a part of me is also really attached to my OC that’s twisted from Jack 🤡 That’s not to say that I don’t want a canonized one; I think I’d actually ASCEND if we got a twisted!Jack Skellington for real!!! It’s just that I wouldn’t know what to do with my OC after the fact 🤷‍♂️ Something similar happened with my Snow White OC when Neige was introduced in book 5 www)
A popular idea I’ve seen in circulation is another isekai plot where either the students go to Halloween Town or the Nightmare Before Christmas characters come to Twisted Wonderland from Halloween Town. I’d wager that’s a pretty safe guess! Like… they’re doing their Halloween parade prep and there’s a new character disrupting things. Maybe they’ll have to pull off a heist or kidnapping of some kind?? 🤔 It would be funny if the NRC boys had to help play matchmaker for a Sally and Jack/j Personally (and this is a stretch), I really would like to see some kind of casino or gambling element because I love those design details for Oogie’s lair. Not sure if it would make sense being a large part of the event story, but it would be cool to consider.
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menlove · 5 months
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the way no is winning that poll is so funny to me I do truly constantly think my experiences are universal until proven otherwise
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sysig · 11 months
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If your almost out of requests I'll send my second allowed one! Didn't want to send a second one at first though to give other people a shot lol
Howsabout.... something something Scriabin with the vibe from the song "This is Love" by Air Traffic Controller? If vibes from songs are allowed ofc xD
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Day 13 - I know wrong, I know right, I just love to pick a fight
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b4kuch1n · 5 months
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tdov was like a week ago already but I just wanna say when I came over to vacation slash help my sworn brother move flat he told me, "ever since you said you wanted to get top surgery I've been thinking about it. it's straight up number two on my bucket list"
#bakuspeech#number one is a house bc obviously. if u can own a house wouldnt u#he was very drunk at that time of the evening. I was not bc I have the constitution of a hot air balloon and any stimulant will blow me up#(relatively new development. france fucked me up big time turns out)#we held hand on his bed for like the whole evening. it was honestly very funny in hindsight but we were extremely earnest in the moment#and Im like. working on this thing as well. I dont got meds or therapy lmao Im bootstrappin here#but yeah early last year his bf offered to get me meds and I... turned it down... I think I was worried abt like. idk. something#but one year past looking back Im fully like that was a stupid move you shouldve gotten meds. youve once again fucked urself baku#but yeah with that kinda realization Ive also come to realized I've somewhat? accepted. that I'm just gonna be. like this#this in light of a number of likely chronic stuff too (hence my balloon-like constitution lmao) and#that's kinda bled into the rest of me without me really noticing#but him bringing that up fully unprompted... kinda jolted me out of it#its just. really incredibly sweet. that someone doesn't want me to settle for what I make do with#and like. preps for that work. just kinda held my hand and told me it's possible to do this actually#I didn't really express how I felt very well in that moment I think my brain is very bad and I process emotions with like a day of delay#but. well. Im thinking abt it Right Now. so yknow thats the kind of impact that had on me lol#not super sure why I wrote all this down here really. I think I just want a good n nice reminder that object permanence is real#and I exist in my friends' life even when Im going insane in a hole by myself#and with the power of friendship we can alter the universe's plan for ourselves and also kill god#that's that. anyways I eat lunch now and then pass out probably. last night was... eventful lmao#but!! very good things on the horizon hopefully. well manifestly we hold hammers and we use them#have a good day lads. let's go out and slay monsters under a highway
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ship-garbage-pile · 1 month
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let's talk about Inquistior Adaars facecard, never once declined.
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astrxealis · 11 months
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if i do "?" in text i'm genuinely tilting my head like a dog if i do "!!" my eyes are sparkling and i am figuratively wagging my tail if i am IN ALL CAPS i'm screaming from the top of a mountain with all the power i can with love and the strength of RAGHHH within me
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zhongli-lover-69 · 11 months
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hey girl is the room flooding or are you just happy to see me
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musical-chick-13 · 1 year
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Girl help, I talked myself out of writing a fic because I was worried about being Harassed™
#ugh maybe I WILL just post it anonymously. and not link it here at all. and only send it to my friends.#honestly it's like. not even That Bad. but I know how people get and I will ABSOLUTELY get accused of 'romanticizing [bad thing]'#which like. I don't think people have the best grasp on what that term really means but. also that's...not the purpose of what I'm doing#anyway. like I don't want to go into specific detail but 100% the point of this is to work through an o/c/d thing but I KNOW people#are not going to see it that way. and it's just...like I understand there is nuance here. because talking about the WAY people#write and represent various issues (in fandom and out of it) is helpful I think. and there are a lot of insidious holdovers from various#types of prejudices occurring in those overall trends. but also like...no one except me knows what's going on in my head and what#my intention is. and I can try to make that clear but that's not always going to translate and also if something is meant to Work Through A#Thing then......I don't want to tell people what exactly it is that I'm working through. that is very private information that I don't want#ANYONE to know. and I don't think I should have to put that on display to be ''''allowed'''' to write this thing I'm writing.#it's also once again very funny to me how many people are like 'oh h*nnibal/h*nnigram peak tv true art™' and then like. get mad at someone#for writing something that's equally fucked up but in a different way#like why does this keep happening.#(I have an idea but I already made that post 2 years ago and I got one of my few instances of actual genuine anon hate over it)#ANYWAY
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casualnepotism · 2 years
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It is a strange thing, for a fighter to be so full of words. Having known a fuck ton of them, they’re usually either too quick-witted or too damaged to have any. But I have so many.
Chock full, some would say. I’ve stored them up for years, months, weeks, days. Hours. All the moments it was expected to say them, I missed. All the moments it wasn’t, I seemed to grasp onto and yet- still- they remain. Even when I manage to get them out of me, they’re the wrong ones: excess that built up over time and spilled out before I could fix them into what they were supposed to be. Cataloging the moments where I could have. Should have. Said anything at all and I couldn’t.
When Maelo said he had it, When Wol decided to leave, When Cog tore out her heart, When Clay made his choice, When Nilos first floated joining the board, When Adiane leaned into her godhood, When Cog destroyed the church, When I killed Wol, When Jack killed Dennis, When Jack died, Again, again, again, When Nilos did leave to join the board,
So many times I’ve written speeches in my head to match you all, discarding them back down to where they could live safely. Knowing they could never match what any of you say without even thinking about it. Knowing that none of your goals align to my own, not really. I kept thinking the time would come, the stars would align, the world would sit still long enough for me to explain. Long enough that you would have time to listen and parse my plodding inanities to hear the point that I hide.
Clumsily. Easily visible to anyone listening, I know. I am not skilled in words the way y’all are, so I have to assume you choose not to hear, and I understand. In your shoes, in the end, given the selfishness of what I ask, I would make the same choice.
My words will never match the ones you all spill forth so easily, handing them to the rest of us like they’re grains of sand and not precious gifts to be hoarded and turned, over and over, until they lose definition with love. Not the ones I hand over, not the ones I hide and perfect, and perfect again and again and again.
I supplement instead with what I can give: a hand, a shoulder, a punching bag, a presence, a whetstone, a shield, a pillow. All of my words, folded and compressed, and shaved of their edges until they can be handed away in a bomb that you will never recognize.
Not a bomb, perhaps. You see? Even now, my words cannot compare.
Allow me to rephrase.
We all know what a milkshake is. We could easily describe it. But there is so much more, for us, held inside the word that we could never describe. For me, anyway.
I hope that you have always understood my actions for what they are. A milkshake for the words I was never able to say. I hope you know that I would never you are so I have never I could never if you were to s I hope you know it’s a milkshake for only one word, really, that you can and should interpret in all its forms.
Stay.
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khaotunq · 1 year
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🥹🥹🥹🥹
#i am always going on about how feedback is lovely but doesn't particularly motivate me#buuuuuuuut#i got a bunch of reblogs tonight on the ayan's instagram edit i made#and i am now back working on kan's#i have his and akk's almost ready to go i just ran out of ideas for posts#i have a few ideas for wat's#i am going to s t r u g g l e with thua's lmao#i may end up doing a second aye one#i'm trying to incorporate their personalities into every element and some are relatively easy#aye am i being a play on words on his name#umakktually being both a sarcastic interjection and a play on um being a common way of transcribing 'yes'#watadirector is pretty self explanatory at the same time as him Doin A Funny#ka555n is just fun to say honestly. but he's the joker of the group so. obviously.#i VERY NEARLY went with etthuabrute for thua but i'd get eaten by thua stans lmao but i think i'm funny#findingnamo was a last minute stroke of exasperation. kid's a cartoon fish or something#i wanna wait for our skyy to incorporate potential uni stuff but i'm#1. not that patient and#2. have absolutely zero impulse control#anyway my period's nearly here and i'm emotional about everything rn so#thanks guys u rly made this old boy's day#about jay#mine: eclipse socials#so it is decreed#but i am putting an absurd amount of thought into other things#kan has more followers than anyone. he also posts constantly. about everything.#akk has the least followers because he barely actually uses the thing and is mainly a lurker on his friends' profiles#like an overbearing parent#wat gets photo credit on half of everybody's posts#which is fun because wat's ig is probably going to be full of photos of everyone else#alksjdfas anyway more coming i promise
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theheadlessgroom · 2 years
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https://www.tumblr.com/beatingheart-bride/710019365046763520/theheadlessgroom-beatingheart-bride
@beatingheart-bride
“​I don’t think it’s silly at all,” he smiled, delighted to know that she had enjoyed the show (even if it was simply the orchestra) as much as he had, as well as admiring her desire to see what he and the rest of the audience saw during a performance. “It’s wonderful to watch-I-I would enjoy watching an opera with you, were we ever afforded that chance.”
What with her being the leading lady now (and would hopefully be the leading lady in many, many productions to come; he had a feeling her future as the opera’s star was within reach), the opportunity for both Randall and Emily to sit down and watch a show together seemed not quite in the cards at the moment (not unless Emily could be in two places at once), but he still liked to imagine that, someday, she would be afforded that chance. Under what circumstances he did not know, but it was a day he liked to think was possible.
And what a day that would be! The two of them, seated in Box Five together, watching and enjoying the show in their own private box in their evening best...perhaps he would see about getting them some fancy chocolates to enjoy during the show, or something to drink (he wasn’t a fan of any of the alcohols available in the café; he’d tasted a few out of curiosity and decided very quickly that they were not for him, instead favoring sparkling, non-alcoholic ciders and the like instead)…she would have the best seat in the house, and he would have the best company...
(He wished most of all, however, that Emily could see what he saw on opening night, when she made her grand debut: He wished he could see how magical she would be onstage, how she would wow the audience with her beautiful voice and emotional performance...she could see how amazing she really, truly was, how gifted she was as a performer!)
“What opera would you most like to see?” Randall asked her curiously, brows raising in interest behind the mask.
#((you make a great point; and i agree! i don't think that randall would be nearly as enamored as he is here))#((were he to have a normal; more stable upbringing; but i also feel like he'd still be very keen on music))#((enough to want to pursue a career in it-i see wilhelm as being fairly musical himself; as he plays the harpsichord))#((and so it just gets me thinking about that fondness for music rubbing off on randall and inspiring him! it might not be the same passion))#((as he has here in this 'verse but i feel like; in a kinder world; he'd still love music; enough to seek out the opera))#((and meet emily as a result!))#((as for his face...i'm not sure! obviously june and wilhelm would work hard to make randall feel confident in himself))#((and not let anyone get him down because of how he looks; but i could see him wearing something when out in public))#((maybe some sort of prosthetics a'la that one-shot we did; where he devised a makeup/prosthetics to wear))#((so that he could go out with emily and the twins? i'm just spitballin' but maybe that'd be his workaround!))#((and true; it is kinda funny! but honestly emily will ALWAYS bring out the pace's parental sides; regardless of how old she is))#((or what she is! vampire? yup! siren? yup!))#((...actually now i'm thinking about little emily meeting little randall at gracey manor when june was working there))#((and june feeling just as maternal towards her as she does towards dorian!))#((don't know if that's an au we would ever do but it just popped into my head and i just imagine little randall being smitten))#((with little emily; just the way little dorian is smitten with little elizabeth!))#outofhatboxes#beatingheart-bride#V:Phantasm of the Mansion
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sysig · 7 months
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Let’s put it all on the line, see who’s victorious (Patreon)
#Doodles#Just Desserts#Villainsona#IRL vent stuff in the tags be warned#I've mentioned offhand that Kaiein is inspired by various sources but overall mostly on one person#And I've been very low contact with that person for years now - but I'm going to meet with them in the near future#I'm nervous as you can imagine haha#But I'd like it infinitely more to have to change Kaiein than to have him reinforced so I'm trying to feel hopeful as well#Either way I'm prepared. Either I get to do some rewriting or I have a very well-worn established outlet#Haha - it's a bit funny actually since there's no one-to-one translation but there is a kind of asymmetrical equivalence going on here#I pretty much never include my family in my sonas' stories - which is double funny since I love being an older sibling so much lol#That aspect rarely makes it into my sonas! I guess I feel like it's not my place to make characters for my loved ones lol#But IRL they're my support system <3 I'm in good hands and I trust them to have my back with what I need to face#And Charm has her wings! The Staff! She has something to rely on that make her more capable and confident!#It's not The Same Thing but it's how it feels ♥ The power of love and friendship!! It makes me stronger!!#And that's what makes the difference between Charm as a villain and a Hero :)#I used her TVAU outfit here - or one of the temps anyway :P - but honestly this is probably how S2 would go down hehe <3#You're no match for Charm when she knows she's loved!! She'll fight you to full defeat!#I wonder how he'd react#Guess I'll find out real soon#Wish me luck
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batsplat · 1 month
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can we have a conversation about how much ktm is in shambles? cause i’m hearing they’re having so many problems financially and apparently even technically. it seems like they got stuck from the start of the season and they are just not progressing. i get that the last few circuits weren’t stop and go circuits that ktm prefers but the performances were really worrying. now, no offense to binder but he clearly has no backbone, but pedro already scolded them this weekend because they are not working the way they should, is there a chance they finally decide to take a risk and develop a project around him? because i feel like that’s what they need to do, a bit like yamaha or honda did for vale and marc. also i’ve thought about the fact that a lot of ktm engineers are leaving ktm for honda, if honda is actually working on a good project for 2027, is there a chance that perhaps a rider like pedro could get them out of the hole they got stuck into? cause i think that would be very interesting to see. of course only if he decides to leave ktm which i hope he doesn’t cause i’d like to see him become the first motogp wdc winner with a ktm. also i can’t really see where else he could go if one day he decides he’s unsatisfied with ktm
love asks that clearly come from the heart. I've been holding off on being too mean about ktm because in a way I do want to save it for after the NEXT race. we're in austria now!! ktm's home race! which they've actually been remarkably successful at, given they're the only non-ducati manufacturer to ever win in the modern iteration of this race in the premier class - first in that quirky last corner shoot-out courtesy of oliveira in 2020 and then in that bizarre slicks in the wet performance by binder in 2021. which, okay, unusual races and all that, but it's a track they should be doing well at!! binder got two second places here last year. if they flop here, then the alarm bells will really be ringing
I guess we can get into an argument about what 'flopping' would even look like. it's entirely plausible that, hm, the first 4-5 slots at minimum are locked out by ducati again - honestly, at the minute another ducati podium lock out feels like the expected scenario. I have heard there's a decent possibility of rain on sunday, but by this point of the year I've been promised rain quite a few times so I'll believe it when I see it. if it rains, sure, anything's possible. a positive result for ktm right now would probably be... a podium, right, which in itself is pretty damning - how are ktm still this bad at actually winning races? last year, binder got a podium at silverstone, which isn't a massively ktm-friendly track. this year, they didn't get even remotely close to that. the ktm defence argument goes 'well, look at what everyone else is doing'. silverstone is a very aprilia-friendly track and they had a pretty disastrous weekend themselves this year. the less said about the japanese manufacturers, the better. but... well, ktm was kinda supposed to take it to ducati this year. they finished last year on a very promising note, with what really should have been a 1-2 at valencia. (the fact that they didn't convert on that maybe should've gotten some alarm bells ringing about the ultimate potential of that rider line-up, but let's not get into that.) after binder's performance at qatar, ktm surely should have been determined to be in the title hunt. they are extremely not in the title hunt
the thing is, anon, ktm does know that pedro is their title winner. the idea of 'developing a project' around him is tricky - because to the extent that ktm is capable of that, they will do it!! they're not going to develop the bike in a direction that suits binder over him, for instance, or completely disregard his feedback or any of that. manufacturers can struggle with being reactive enough to rider concerns... my sense is that ktm likes to throw a lot of stuff at problems, it likes to flex its muscles and use a lot of data and come up with big update packages and all of that - and for all the progress they've made in their bike development, clearly all is not yet well on the in-season development front. (cf the whole chattering thing that ducati has gotten a handle on and ktm hasn't.) manufacturers do sometimes have a tendency to believe they know best and not listen enough to their riders, especially when there's a disconnect between the riders and 'the factory' that's actually designing the bikes. yamaha is an interesting example of that at the minute, where a lot of their current problems are so long-running that you can find their roots in stuff jorge and valentino were complaining about YEARS and years back. they've become a lot more reactive in recent years and did do a lot to tackle fabio's complaints about the bike's top speed... but by that point, they were in such a hole that just 'fixing the top speed' really wasn't enough to actually make a competitive bike. still, part of the reason why fabio's decided to stick with that project is he feels like yamaha is finally listening to him - and if they'd lost him, they'd really be fucked, so that has to count as at least a little bit of a W
in terms of the valentino and marc comparisons, they are just about different enough that it'll only take you so far. with valentino, the simple truth is that nobody today could do what he did for the yamaha project in 2004. he couldn't do that nowadays; it just isn't possible for a rider and his team to make that sort of instant impact anymore. motogp is so different now, with all the aero and devices and all the other stuff casey hates. the balance of power, if you will, has shifted pretty decisively from riders to engineers. also, valentino by that point was a fair bit more experienced and a lot of the credit has to go to his even more experienced team for what they were able to do with yamaha's carte blanche. a rookie, however gifted, just won't be able to provide quite the same level of direction. with marc... well, the honda was fantastic when he showed up! best bike on the grid! it's not exactly an analogous situation to pedro in that what honda needed to do was 'keep being good'. they did listen to marc's feedback and it did bag them enough titles to make it worth their while, but it also did not send their bike down a particularly happy development route for anyone else riding that thing - which ultimately as a manufacturer is not a situation you should want. honda was already losing the development arms race to ducati in the late 2010s, but giving marc a fast if capricious bike and relying on his natural talent to ride around the issues managed to disguise the problems for a while... or at least make them hurt less. all in all, I'm not really convinced 2010s honda is a model anyone should be particularly interested in copying
what ktm should do is listen to pedro, obviously. I assume they're already treating him as their championship contender elect, but if they're not then, yes, they'd be idiots. and given how long it took for them to actually confirm his place in motogp last year, I am open to the possibility that ktm are being idiots here. whether there's a workable system in place to actually make use of that feedback and continue to progress is more open for debate, and that's kinda what pedro went to the factory to check in on. pedro today was talking up a "big, big step" in the coming few races, in part due to the impact of their two test riders and the more ktm-friendly circuits to come, so it'll be interesting to see if it lives up to that. beyond that, who knows? ktm does have money and resources and a track record of success outside of motogp to give it faith, but of course this year has been a disappointment. (quick note: I have seen the stuff about ktm being in trouble financially and obviously that would massively change all of this, but at this stage it's quite hard to judge how seriously to take that - so the rest of this ask will assume that ktm will continue having a lot of money at its disposal. if they don't, my analysis is that they're probably fucked.) the first bit of the season made everyone doubt whether the bike was actually better than thought and the riders were simply not taking advantage of it - which a few signs last year like 'surely dani shouldn't be this competitive' and the whole valencia thing already pointed to. now, it's definitely less competitive than last year and even their superstar rookie can't do all that much with it, so that's not great. they do have a little time to play with here, but not that much. pedro's signed for 2025-26, but if ktm doesn't start next season more competitive, it won't take long for him to start looking around. and even though you can't do valentino 2004 things in quite the same way anymore, this is clearly going to be a project that needs an alien-level talent to actually get it over the line. they've kinda managed to fail upwards into a very strong set of riders next year and they should be able to extract a lot of them for bike development purposes, but also their rider management has traditionally been godawful so it remains to be seen how that'll work out
that being said, pedro will be fine! I mean, idk if he'll be ktm's first premier class world champion. if I had to put money on it, I'd say it's pretty likely, yeah? but the 'where would he go' thing isn't really a big concern. all the big names have kinda hunkered down (as have the teams who signed them) with two year contracts that take us very neatly to the next rule cycle kicking in, which everyone expects will majorly shake things up. while this whole japanese manufacturer situation is massively annoying, I would be shocked if at least one of them aren't regular race winners again in 2027, and hopefully will already be so before that. most manufacturers except maybe honda have at least one star rider they're intending to be a title contender in 2027, and ducati has two. they probably won't all stay in the same place (even if they all remain reasonably healthy in that time) and there's bound to be at least one manufacturer hunting for a big name. pecco will be in his late prime and possibly grey-haired, god knows what state marc will be in *taps wood*, we have no idea how the whole jorge aprilia situation will work out. maybe yamaha will be so competitive again that they actually decide they want TWO riders fighting it out for a championship and we get a proper throwback in blue to the good old garage cold war days - which is where my imagination sadly fails me because I can't picture fabio putting up a wall or yamaha not sucking. maybe, like you say, pedro is just what honda needs to... well, honestly I don't think he could get them out of this hole - but perhaps in a couple years time when honda is looking healthier again, he's the kind of rider that could make it a title winner again. it'll be a new world! if pedro is as good as we all think he is, then obviously any manufacturer would be thrilled to get their hands on him, not least to deprive the competition of having him. how old will he be in 2026? about nine years old, I think? if I had to guess, I do kinda see him being a title contender around 2026-ish, because I just can't quite picture ktm making the necessary leap by next year so 2026 feels like a good way of hedging my bets and trusting his sickening levels of natural talent to make up the bike difference. one of my big remaining doubts is... well, it's actually been quite a while since a new manufacturer has won a rider's title. the last time was ducati way back in 2007 when they nailed the new regulations cycle and also kinda lucked into signing the casey stoner, but ducati had already been regular race winners for quite a few years before that. capirossi was third in the championship in 2006. I suppose aprilia got vaguely close in 2022, but that was a chaos season we don't have much reason to expect to see a repeat of any time soon, and in the end they also didn't get that close. ktm really needs to be getting into race winning form soon if they want to be thinking about titles. it's ridiculous that it's been over three years since their last win in the dry, and nearly two since their last win full stop. if I were them, I would maybe consider winning some races, instead of continuing to lose them idk. let's see how they do on sunday, eh
#this has been languishing unanswered for a good week but crucially i can get in my hot take before friday practise#also the binder dig lol. honestly i've never really got what his deal is supposed to be but i don't think a backbone would really hELP him#binder becoming ktm's golden boy of all golden boys was always kinda a weird situation#i haven't understood a lot of what ktm's been up to these last few years really. never been a believer in this set up#my ktm takes have gone from being very contrarian to incredibly mainstream this year which has been a satisfying journey#//#brr brr#batsplat responds#i think i've mentioned this before but i do have to state in the interest of fairness that i'm broadly rooting for ktm to fail here#i just have such deep contempt for their whole deal and *especially* their incompetent rider management#that it'd just be deeply funny to me personally if they fucked THAT line up. like you convinced them all to trust you and now what#and i'm not really invested enough in any non-pedro bit of next year's line up to feel all too bad if things go south. he'll be fine!!#i've basically existed in a very casey-ish state of schadenfreude about the ktm project since the start of the year#both when pedro was doing well and now they're all flopping. because at each stage it was kinda proof ktm had been fucking about#but i'm aware that all good things come to an end and am broadly expecting ktm to get their act together and win a lot to piss me off#by contrast i have a lot of respect for the aprilia operation but am deeply pessimistic about that thing's future. so goes life#it's the money thing unfortunately. that's what it all comes back to. ktm will fail upwards because they'll never run out of the shit#or ktm goes bankrupt and then we're all free!!#whereas my poor scrappy underdogs over at aprilia are relying on hopes and a prayer on that front#the fact they're so much better than honda and yamaha is... god let's not even talk about them don't get me started#current tag
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astrxealis · 1 year
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good morning my personality for the day is that i'm uncontrollably sobbing on the inside about ff9 and ff10
#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚#RAGHHH FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL AGAIN....... feels unreal tbh lol whatever#i'm a tad bit sick which is worrisome and it's been raining a fuckton in the ph . thankfully i'm not affected#but my heart goes out to those who have :') you guys here stay safe okay!!#and HIII I HOPE YOU ALL ARE WELL <3 it's way too early for me in the morning i woke up at 5 holy fuck uh. i hope u all are well#anyway Not Alone and Suteki Da Ne and Melodies Of Life ..... i am ruined#the ending of ffx . the whole thing with Friendship in ffix.#yk the funny thing... ffx was my childhood it is and was everything to me and my first final fantasy but i still haven't finished it actuall#ik the story and i'm literally at the end but my spheres suck. i was not even 13 when i started playing okay.... on ps3 And ps4#:(( tidus and yuna are everything to me. the whole main cast is tbh. i love them dearly#ix i have not actually played yet hahaha i'm crazy ik but my twin has!! anddd i just love all final fantasies vvv much#ik some stuff abt ix but obvs it's nothing compared to. Actually Playing The Game#i did play a bit tho ^_^ until the#vamo' alla flamenco!!#oh i had to search it to make sure i was right in spelling and Bless. i actually was lol#honestly idk my fav in ix but x it is . tidus yuna rikku. can't pick! but yes i adore tidus he's everything#uhmm ix tho... freya? zidane? dagger? vivi? ya#awh. i love ff sooo much#still also very much in a xiv mood btw. uhmm raha themis alisaie hyth zenos zero my beloveds!#those r my top favs me thinks but i have wayyy too many :] lyse... magnai... fandaniel... venat... thancred... ryne... urianger... fordola#and etc. dhgjsbsj there is a Lot. my heart goes out to so many of them but i think my top favs are the ones i said first fr ^_^#funny daniel got demoted to a lesser fav i'm sorry luv LMFAO but maybe when i'm in a fandaniel mood again someday. yay!
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planetpiastri · 6 months
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pairing: lando norris x fem!australian!reader [no faceclaim] summary: honestly, you kind of expected this part-time gig to just be four days of pure chaos that gave you an excuse to see an f1 race up close. then some guy in the fanzone complimented your shoes, and the rest is history. notes: requested by anon!! this has been sitting in my drafts for aaaaages, sorry love <3 y'all are so brave for putting up with me while i try and remember how tf to write these uhhh yeah this one took a turn hope u like it anyway LMFAO
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liked by oscarpiastri, ynusername, and 13,024 others
ausgp Arriving in style! The lads looked great at the Melbourne Walk today 🤩🤩
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username1 lewis and zhou are absolutely slaying!! and oscar is also there
ynusername oscar i love you but you gotta step up your game mate, i wanna wear your merch so bad but it is UGLY!!
landonorris excuse me ausgp i think my fit was deserving of recognition in this post :(
ausgp Can't compete with the hometown hero 🤷‍♂️ landonorris but daniel isn't in this either ? oscarpiastri You're funny.
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landonorris
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liked by mclaren, ausgp, and 811,364 others
landonorris he shoots, he scores! thanks for such a warm welcome melbourne :)
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oscarpiastri You and I have different definitions of scoring I think
landonorris ever heard of playing the long game? oscarpiastri Nurse he's out again
username2 where's the worker with the shoes i think they're indirecting her
username3 GET THIS MAN THE SHOE LADY'S DIGITS
maxfewtrell Now that's just uncalled for
ausgp Love to see the spirit 😉
username4 aww lando always looks so happy in melbourne, he loves it here :'))
ynusername oh wtf
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liked by ausgp, yourfriend, and others
ynusername busy busy busy day, absolutely buggered, but very excited for tomorrow 😁 (also peep The Shoes on the last slide)
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yourfriend i mean... he's right, they are sick shoes
ynusername you're just saying that cos you made me buy them yourfriend well yes!
username5 omg are u the girl who was working the fanzone today??
ynusername i was one of them!
username6 ok if this is the shoe lady i don't blame lando for staring she's so pretty omg
yourfriend "the shoe lady" ynusername i've been titled?????
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ynusername
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liked by yourfriend, landonorris, and others
ynusername weirdest work day ever (included today's shoes bc apparently it's a thing now)
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yourfriend that wrap was good as hell tho
ynusername deffo the most exciting part of lunch
username7 wait who is this girl and why does lando follow her?
username8 go to lovestruckln on twitter, she has a whole thread about it!
landonorris ...weird in a good way, right?
username9 your lack of rizz is astounding lando username10 bro STAND UP ynusername weird in an interesting way landonorris i'll take that
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landonorris
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liked by ynusername, ausgp, and 1,011,023 others
landonorris melb, you have my ❤️
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username11 SHOE GIRLLLLLL
username12 i hope they never hard launch and he just keeps posting pics of cool sneakers
georgerussell63 You're welcome
charles_leclerc You did it, you crazy son of a bitch ausgp Where's our credit?? georgerussell63 You put the pieces in play, I moved them into checkmate ynusername you threw a shoe at me. calm down. ausgp He what???
username13 bro's collecting aussies like infinity stones
danielricciardo ?? oscarpiastri No ynusername :// landonorris 😁😁
ynusername you're cool ig 🙄
landonorris your swag style and utter disdain for me has captured my heart ynusername oh my god stop i'm blushing
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tagging: @thearchieves @sheridamn @nikfigueiredo @charlig123456789 @ilove-tswizzle @aandreea2005 @sideboobrry @vellicora @eire-the-egg @marymustdie @cocote1410 @taygrls @koalapastries @vroomvroommuppett @nichmeddar @d3kstar @333kiki @ririyulife @resident-swiftie @zimm04 @jupiter-je-taime @ever_bizzare @clemswrld @hollieeelol @leireggsworld @ironmaiden1313 @lunar-racing @lightninginab0ttle @maddie-naps @bwddermilch @pnkwhskyprncss @landossainz @chaotic_version
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request: hiya! i love how funny your smau’s are and i’m begging for an aussie!reader x Lando one. maybe she works for the AusGP and they met in Melbourne? idk -anon
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