#it's winston (billions)!!!!! of course i do

[unproduciblesmackdown]

truly lmao 2024 lambda literary award finalist wynnstannery

[missxoier]

Hi Billions fans, do you have another space for one more?

I know I hyperfix myself with strange things but this???? I don't know how it happened

[nothingunrealistic]

review roundup: billions 7x12 “admirals fund”

here we are at the end of all things billions! at least until the spinoffs start! what did reviewers think?

New York Times: ‘Billions’ Series Finale Recap: The Last Battle

Am I at a loss for words over the series finale of “Billions”? That depends. Do hooting and hollering count as “words”?

REAL.

There’s no other way to put this: In its final hour, “Billions” delivered, and delivered, and delivered. It saw what it needed to do — spend 45 minutes beating the living snot out of Mike Prince, and the remaining 15 minutes depicting beloved characters being really nice to each other for a change — and by God did it.

i think it could have delivered a little better on both fronts, but good efforts were made.

It’s clear from the confidence on the faces of Taylor, Bobby, Chuck and Wendy in the first shot that things are nowhere near as dire as they seemed at the end of the previous episode. Kate’s arrival on the scene moments later only confirms what I’d come to suspect last week: The forces of good had an inside woman, who for two months has been undermining an oblivious Prince. But wait, there’s more! Philip, too, is a double agent, and has been from virtually the moment Prince ruined Philip’s mentor. His big show of distancing himself from Wendy’s scheme was just that, a show. And while Kate really did ferret out the anti-Prince conspiracy on her own, she ratted it out to Mike as a way of furthering it, not destroying it. Every move Kate and Philip have made since — most importantly allocating sole control of investing power to Philip, then outsourcing all investing decisions to Winston’s algorithm — has been made with the destruction of Prince in mind.

and we love that for everyone involved! …except winston. who was, inexplicably, not involved despite being essential to the success of team kill prince.

Prince’s subsequent meltdown, climaxing in tossing a printer through Wendy’s glass wall — a scene teased in the season premiere — is an absolute joy to behold.

yes!!! it was a printer!!!

Even Scooter’s bacon gets saved. Following Prince’s defeat, the man Wags calls the best second-in-command he’s ever seen quits the ex-candidate’s employ to go it on his own, leaving Mike completely alone. He now finds himself with $100 million — the exact same amount left to Prince — thanks to his nephew Philip. The two men patch things up before Scooter leaves to pursue his dream: to become an orchestral conductor at last. All our heroes get that kind of emotional send off. In pair after pair, they make their peace and call it a job well done: Axe and Taylor, Axe and Wendy, Wendy and Taylor, Scooter and Wags, Wags and Axe — and of course Chuck and Axe, who shake hands and agree that while they may once again cross swords in the future, they’ll do their best to keep it clean in the interim.

hmmm seems to me like there’s a pretty important pairing of two characters mentioned in these paragraphs that Didn’t get a much-deserved sendoff!

Chuck and Wendy are happy. Axe and Wags are happy and possibly moving to Miami for a spinoff.

😏😏😏😏😏

You could complain that this is all too pat, too easy. You could say it’s not reflective of how things work in the real world. You could make an argument that Prince should have won, or that Axe and Chuck should have gone out in a metaphorical murder-suicide situation, like Will Graham and Dr. Lecter at the end of “Hannibal.” You could say all of that, and I’d simply ignore it. Long one of the most sheerly entertaining shows on television, “Billions” closed out its run by doing the most entertaining things it could. If we in the real world have so far failed to defeat our Prince-style villains, so what? The central conceit of “Billions” is that Chuck Rhoades and Bobby Axelrod are, each in their own way, the cleverest people in the game. The game is over, so let them sink that battleship, let them connect four, let them pass go and collect $200. The message of “Billions” is that you need great people to defeat Great Men.

fair enough. i can respect that brian & david decided to end things by making the fans happy rather than making them mad, whether for Realism or for schadenfreude. i’m just annoyed that their mental picture of True Billions Obsessives Who Deserve Fanservice is so narrowly drawn.

The awful compliance officer Ari Spyros gets a big reward from Axe, despite never having done a single decent thing in the course of the series. (Or in the course of his life — am I the only one who remembers he weaseled his way out of sexual assault charges in college?)

you’re not the only one! really makes you wonder how the writers chose Which characters, exactly, deserved to be in the finale and become fabulously wealthy about it.

In this cameo-heavy season, were there any characters from the past you wanted to see again but didn’t? I missed Lara Axelrod (Malin Akerman), who was initially a quarter of the show’s core foursome; Dr. Gus (Marc Kudisch), the bombastic performance coach I once thought was as valuable an addition to the cast as Taylor, introduced at the same time; Oliver Dake (Christopher Denham), the officious government watchdog who seemed every bit as canny as his quarry right until the moment he was beaten; and Catherine Brant (Julianna Margulies), the Chuck Rhoades love interest lost to pandemic logistics.

this list manages to miss out my entire list, which boils down to “every previous character primarily or solely relevant to taylor.” oscar! sara! douglas! lauren! winston once he was fired and in a context that let him interact with taylor again! (also, lol and lmao at sean having once thought dr. gus was as valuable an addition as taylor.) OH ALSO: i would have loved to see the return of savion, the kid who lived in axe’s former house and whom axe promised to be there for if he ever needed help.

I adored the way Axe revealed that his destruction of Mike’s fortune was a fait accompli: “Not doing, Mike. Done.” It reminds me of “Watchmen,” and (spoiler alert) Ozymandias’s jaw-dropping statement at the climax of Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons’s seminal superhero comic: “I did it 35 minutes ago.”

yeah, that was fun.

Watching Philip emerge from the rubble of Prince Cap intact while his superiors fled in disgrace, I suddenly realized what the purpose of this character is in the context of the larger Mike Prince story line: He’s the guy who wins. In the end, he’s simply smarter and cannier than his uncle Scooter and would-be mentor Mike. I suddenly find myself hoping he sticks around for one of the rumored “Billions” spinoffs.

philip is a winner because he wins! he motherfucking wins!! (of course, if the writers knew what was up, he could have been “the guy who’s a Peer / Partner / Equal to taylor in a way no one else really has been,” and maybe even “the guy who goes with taylor as they walk away from the rest of their life.” i would love to see him in a spinoff too, especially if taylor is there.)

Vulture: Billions Series-Finale Recap: Take the Money and Run

five stars!

Ladies and gentlemen, presenting the warmest and fuzziest episode of Billions ever!

hey, could you say that first part again?

Ladies and gentlemen,

yeah. that’s what i thought.

Sure, co-creators Brian Koppelman and David Levien, who wrote the series finale, gave us the expected tension-filled hour featuring a super-elaborate scheme, a Steve Miller Band soundtrack, and no shortage of double-, triple-, and quadruple-crossings.

i don’t think it went beyond double-crossings. triple- and quadruple-crossings would only really come into play if we got something like the fake reddit spoiler ending wherein, quote: “Chuck arrests Axe and from prison Axe uses a burner phone to have Wags leak the contents of the flash drive to that reporter guy. Chuck gets arrested and disbarred and ends up in the same cell as Axe.” but the warmth and fuzziness didn’t really allow for any of that.

While Wendy and Taylor demonstrated evolution by forging new career paths — with even Wags hinting he won’t stick around Axe Global for long — Chuck and Axe are literally back to doing the same things they were up to when Billions began: Axe, for all his talk of freedom at the start of the season, is now … the head of his namesake hedge fund.

i do enjoy the irony that the three people who were desperate to bring axe back at the start of the season are all leaving, or looking for ways out, now that he’s back on his throne. not so great when he’s sticking around long-term, is he?

After seven seasons of selfish, mercenary plays, this was the one time when (nearly) everyone worked together for the greater good, proving the season’s overarching theme: Nurture your friendships because you never know when you’ll need those friends to help vanquish your enemies.

which is almost exactly what axe told prince at their first standoff in 7x10! and prince should have listened, because his failure to focus on his supposed friends and allies brought him down!

Taylor hacks into Michael Prince Capital’s risk-management algorithm (thanks, Winston!) and reprograms it to “zig when it’s supposed to zag.” Philip then merely follows his boss’s orders by deploying all capital and insisting that the algorithm do its work.

here’s how taylipton can still win

As part of the tension build-up, we get more warm and fuzzy farewells between Wendy and Taylor, and even Chuck and Dave Mahar, the latter of whom is also part of the Mike Prince takedown: The New York State attorney general played a key role in ensuring the SEC didn’t let Prince or Scooter put a stop (or reversal) on any of the trades made by MPC that day.

dave & chuck’s last interaction > wendy & taylor’s last interaction.

Philip may have turned on Prince, but Scooter will always be his family: He protected his uncle’s account while draining Prince’s coffers, leaving Scooter with about $100 million and a fitting term of endearment: “Maestro.”

:')

It is a rare feat where one of the most abhorrent characters in recent television history can make me cry. So I have to give the highest accolades to Koppelman and Levien for writing such an impeccable scene — and to Jeffrey DeMunn, who managed to get my tears flowing without losing one hint of Senior’s repugnant essence (comparing Chuck to Phil Spector? Typical Senior).

skill issue.

Axe gives both Wendy and Taylor the hard sell, but neither will be swayed. The one consolation is that this version of Axe lets Wendy and Taylor go with grace. He even offers Taylor the old Axe Global office for a philanthropy organization. When they arrive at the empty location, there’s one last gift waiting for them: a placard reading “The Taylor Mason Foundation” with a familiar TM logo. Stop making me cry, Billions!

yeah, that got me. especially when i figured out it had to have been axe who had that sign put there.

It took seven seasons, but Billions eventually got the memo: Work doesn’t have to be the center of your life.

that’s not the impression i got from this episode, lmao. basically everyone is either returning to their old job or moving on to a new job. the closest we get to anyone going “fuck this, i’m quitting and going to hang out on the beach” is wags’s plan to Maybe go down to miami for unspecified purposes.

So much for my theory that Dr. Mayer was secretly working with either Axe or Prince. But I agree she’d make a great Wendy replacement at Axe Global.

i would be shocked if she even accepted the offer to work there. after all that about wendy keeping her patients imprisoned on a hamster wheel, why would dr. mayer take up that baton? and how many of the axe globetrotters who’d had her as a therapist and been dumped by her in favor of wendy would want to let her back in?

Fan Fun with Damian Lewis (Damianista): Billions on Showtime, Season 7 Episode 12: Admiral’s Fund (Series Finale)

We now go back to eight weeks ago: Kate invites Wags to a meeting after their elevator talk in Episode 6 The Man in the Olive Drab Tshirt. Wags arrives at his favorite burger place Joe Junior with a big appetite but loses it as soon as he sees Wendy there also waiting for Kate! And Taylor joining them in a few minutes means they have been busted. However, thanks to Wendy’s super human persuasive powers, Kate decides to put her country before her personal interests and joins them.

wendy’s superhuman persuasive powers that we had to imagine for ourselves since the writers didn’t show us one word of sacker Actually Being Convinced to join team kill prince! for some reason!

And, lo and behold, Philip is in! Wendy just makes sure that the two of them have a meeting in Wendy’s office in which Philip openly says he would not participate in whatever Wendy, Taylor and Wags are plotting against Prince and so Prince keeps him close.

correction: philip says he won’t participate in “Whatever [Wendy], and Taylor, and I don’t know who else are thinking about doing” — no mention of wags, likely because there’s no plausible way for philip to have theoretically sussed out wags’s involvement on his own, and mentioning him would give away too much. (i still wish we’d revisited the waiver that philip allegedly signed, whether or not it was real.)

Remember Season 4 Episode 12 Extreme Sandbox where Axe sends Rebecca on a retreat with Wendy and destroys her business while she is off the grid? And now the rebels are doing the exact same thing with Prince.

well that’s also tied to prince and scooter going off the grid earlier this season at the killer mike listening party. which is how wags and then philip acquired the signoff power that’s central to destroying prince's billions while he’s off the grid again. bit more relevant.

As MPC is taking major hits, Philip says that their “the infant car seat of algos” will protect them.

while you were studying the blade i studied ISOFIX so i could make you the very best infant car seat in the world <3

And the two of them, finding their way back to who they were when they first met, make Bryan’s dream come true and have his law license reinstated. I remember that Orrin Bach is Bryan’s professor from law school and, who knows, his law firm may have a spot for him!

not sure if it’s “his” law firm now that bach is officially axe’s general counsel, but hey, maybe!

When Prince gets into the office yelling at Peach to find Wendy fucking Rhoades for him, he realizes that she is actually here. And he grabs a printer and throws it through Wendy’s glass walls!

yes! it was a printer!

Remember that Prince had Winston change the algorithm parameters in Episode 11: Axe Global to reduce profit temporarily as an objective to protect the downside.

sacker had winston do that, actually, though on prince’s orders. seems like a relevant distinction knowing that sacker was on team kill prince at the time.

Prince finds his way to see the one man whom he still trusts. I admit I was wrong about Scooter. I think I have read too much into the “Murder on the Orient Express” reference that Wendy made to Wags in Episode 4 Hurricane Rosie.

YA THINK?

That is why I firmly believed that Scooter would join the rebels, but he did not. He was loyal to the end but now he wants to go find his own way. And when Prince insists that their mission was righteous and they just hit a snag, Scooter has a few words to say: “I can’t say I committed blindly to it but I was blinded along the way by my sense of fealty. Loyalty to you.” So he knew there was nothing righteous about the mission. He was just loyal.

billions characters (and writers. and actors.) love to emphasize Loyalty as one of the highest possible virtues, and billions fans love to go right along with that in their assessment of who is or isn’t Worthy. this is a great illustration of why i disagree. what’s admirable or virtuous about loyalty to a bad actor or a bad cause?

And here is the dozen I believe that have actively participated in taking down Prince! [PHOTO GRID: Taylor, Chuck, Wendy, Axe; Wags, Dunlop, Philip, Sacker; Dave, Mafee, Ira, Senior]

once again you are reading too much into the Murder on the Orient Express reference and it’s making you forget, or leave out, people who actively participated in taking down prince! allerd! hall! derek! bach didn’t do much but he was at the team kill prince extended edition meeting at chuck’s house in 7x11! winston didn’t deliberately participate but his work was crucial to taking down prince!

So the plan is to siphon the employee money into the Admirals Fund and buy the natural gas stocks when the price hits the  bottom. I believe this is the algo that Taylor works on when Axe enters their office and tells “the kid” to work with him going forward. 

no, that was winston’s risk management algorithm that was reworked to put prince’s money at risk. moving employee money to the admirals fund was mafee’s job. see, right after the news about collusion in natural gas starts hitting:

TAYLOR: The account’s available to you. You poised and ready for when it’s time? MAFEE: Hell yes, I’m ready.

and this is shortly after spyros confronts philip over a long-dormant account that mysteriously contains cash.

With the Admirals Fund play, Taylor has probably exceeded their $1B target so they are determined to leave the world of finance to go into philanthropy. So putting aside his dream of “you and me, together again, kid” and, as a last act of charity, offers his protege the Axe Global HQ in the city. When Taylor arrives there they find “Taylor Mason Foundation” written over itAxe and Wendy has been the most intriguing relationship in Billions. I know that a lot of fans wanted them to get together as a couple, and they were close in Season 5. But I have always admired their deep friendship and written a 10-part series on their relationship – go figure!

i copied and pasted this paragraph exactly as it appears in damianista’s review. she started talking about axe & wendy quite literally in the middle of discussing taylor’s ending. great work. now everyone brace yourselves for a terrible sentence written about this show that isn’t about rian, amazingly.

I believe that a man and a woman can have a relationship based on care and trust without any sexy time.

straight people are really something.

Dr. Mayer. I was wrong about her. I thought she was sharing information with Scooter. And I also thought Rian would use the fingerprints she collected from Prince somehow. Billions has made me such a cynical person! 😀

once again: skill issue. there were no fingerprints!!!

While I am happy to report that the final season has granted almost all of my expectations, wishes, and fantasies, the scene that makes me the happiest is to see Wendy and Chuck say these words: WENDY: I hoped you’d be here. CHUCK: I’m always here. As they have a family dinner at the Hibachi complete with Bryan’s show their smiles are genuine. These two belong together.

can anyone out there conceive of the most important relationships in wendy’s life not being with chuck and axe? or any other shitty men? hello? it’s so dark in here

Entertainment Weekly: Billions recap

yet again no entertainment weekly recap. anticlimactic!

Fan Fun with Damian Lewis (Gingersnap): The Unbeatable, Unstoppable, Unparalleled MVPs from Billions Season 7 Episode 12 Series Finale, “Admirals Fund”

Gingersnap Honoring Our Fathers Award – I don’t know whether to bequeath this to Charles Koppelman in memoriam, Brian Koppelman the writer/showrunner, Jeffrey DeMunn and Paul Giamatti the actors, Charles Sr. the character, or all of the above. It is not lost on me that the scene between Chuck Rhoades (Giamatti) and his father Charles Sr. (DeMunn) could be a nod/final send off – a hug to and from the beyond, so to speak – from Brian Koppelman to his father Charles Koppelman whom he lost in November, 2022.

please don’t besmirch brian’s dead father’s memory by comparing him to chuck senior. (according to brian, people often assume chuck senior was based on his father. he was not. but brian did put one (1) thing his father had said about him into chuck senior’s dialogue.)

Breaking the Fourth Wall Kudos – Wags when he seemingly sent a good-bye message to us, the viewers, but said it to Prince: “Hey man, endings are tough. Someone always ends up unsatisfied.” This one, however, wasn’t tough; this viewer is satisfied.” I’d almost bet a billion dollars the writers and showrunners were telling us fans and Billions‘ Obsessives good-bye through Wags.

they absolutely were.

Terrific Tune – Take the Money and Run by Steve Miller Band.

cosigned!

The Heinz Ketchup Walk of Shame Honor – Prince for throwing a printer through the glass walls of Wendy’s office after learning she and The Avengers have wiped out the company portfolio, locked him out of his company account and sealed the fate of his presidential run.

yes! it was a printer! (the ketchup thing is explained by the rest of the paragraph, but i don’t care enough to copy and paste it.)

The Sopranos Finale Kindred Award – This award goes to the Billions writers and showrunners for the final scene where Wendy, Chuck and their children enjoy a meal together, along with hibachi chef Bryan Connerty. Fade to black. This gave me all the feels of the The Sopranos final scene of the series where Tony, Carmela and their children enjoy onion rings together at the New Jersey diner. Albeit, no mafia hits.

just like the sopranos finale without the deliberately escalating tension or the abrupt cut to black or the implied mafia hit! so, people in a restaurant! groundbreaking!

Damianista […] Dangerous Dozen – The Revolutionaries [PHOTO GRID: Taylor, Chuck, Wendy, Axe; Wags, Dunlop, Philip, Sacker; Dave, Mafee, Ira, Senior] These men and women have actively participated in the successful revolution against Mike Prince, beating him at his own game, collectively impoverishing him and finishing his presidential campaign. I do not think anyone in their right mind wants to mess with any of them.

hey, could you say that first part again?

These men and women

and remind me who that first picture is of?

[PHOTO GRID: Taylor,

🤔🤔🤔

The Ship – Chuck and Wendy No other words needed. These two belong together.

[EXTREMELY LOUD INCORRECT BUZZER]

Lady Trader The Great Nephew Award – I think Scooter will certainly make sure that Philip gets an extra piece of pie at the next holiday get together! Philip making sure Scooter’s account was out of the fray and kept whole shows that sometimes blood is truly thicker than water.

the BEST nephew!!!

TheTailThatWagsTheDog Most Poignant Wendy-Chuck Connection? – The very first “Previously on Billions” intro was spoken by Maggie Siff in season 1, episode 2 (they obviously wouldn’t need it for the pilot). For the final episode, it was spoken by Paul Giamatti. I wouldn’t be at all surprised if that was done purposefully.

incorrect! the first “previously on billions” was spoken by lara! i double-checked just to be sure!

Time Travel Award – To Spyros, who apparently went from Manhattan to Camp David to confront the Marines and try and warn Prince and then got back to Manhattan all in the course of an afternoon. It’s 240 miles one way – even if he had Prince’s helo he couldn’t have done that in time.

the antics of the episode spanned several hours. spyros left mpc in the morning, while prince & co were still At camp david and oblivious to team kill prince’s scheming. chuck’s press conference probably happened around 1:00, since the stock prices of the companies under investigation rebounded shortly after that time, and that was after prince & co had to travel all the way back from camp david. spyros then returns right around the time axe tells everyone about the admirals fund and philip turns the tv to cnbc’s closing bell, which airs from 3:00 to 4:00 on weekdays. a cursory google for “how fast does a helicopter go” gives a range of answers that, for civilian helicopters, roughly center on 150 mph. if spyros had managed to secure a helicopter, he could have traveled the 240 miles there and back (so, 480 miles total) in 3.2 hours. up it to 3.5 hours to account for driving at both ends of the journey and getting beaten up by marines, and that’s still doable in my opinion.

Best Film Homage – I know our fearless leader Bahar likens the plot of this season to Murder on the Orient Express since Wendy references that film early in the season, but I wonder if it might also relate to other, “gather the troops to thwart a common foe” film like The Sting or Oceans 11. I could definitely see Koppelman being a fan of, and inspired by, The Sting. I half expected to see Chuck and Bobby do a little nose swipe at the end.

[brian koppelman tiktok voice] no, not Ocean’s Eleven, dude. Levien and I made the movie Ocean’s Thirteen with Steven Soderbergh.

Best Sci-Fi Reference – Taylor with the mind-meld comment to Bobby. You would figure they would be a trekkie. I assume Taylor is Spock in this case and Bobby is James Tiberius Kirk.

you don’t understand spock or kirk or vulcan mind melds and should never speak about any of them ever again.

Fan Fun with Damian Lewis (Lady Trader): “From the Trader’s Desk” All’s Well that Ends Well Billions S7E12 “Admirals Fund”

I was so happy that the show got back to it’s roots and the demise of Prince was financial and trading in nature. The series went in a political direction this season with Prince running for President, and it really wasn’t my cup of tea.

heaven forbid the show about power politics in new york get political! (frankly i wish it had gone harder on that. show us one specific policy prince wants to implement! one plank of his political platform! any part of his recurring televised speeches that isn’t just Both Parties Are Bad For Unspecified Reasons! show us a prospective prince voter and tell us why they’re voting for him!)

Kate joining the conspiracy was key. Once she was on board, she was able to let Wendy, Taylor and Wags know about the video taping Prince was doing in the office.

another thing that was implied that i wish we’d actually seen!

Mafee is ready to buy the names at the bottom, because he knows that Chuck will hold a press conference to tell the world that there is no collusion, and the stories were just rumors. Those nat gas names will take off and Axe Global will make billions. As an aside, if I had been in on the plan, I would have shorted the names before the open, cover them before Chuck’s press conference, then buy them up at the lows of the day. That way you would be making money both on the downturn and the upswing.

i would think shorting the names beforehand would open you up to allegations of insider trading, but i’m not sure how much that matters when the outcome here is already “sure there were a bunch of crimes involved in taking prince down but what’s he gonna do, sue everyone? with what money and what lawyers?”

Because Kate had Winston recalibrate the risk management of his algorithm to focus away from profit, the algorithm most likely stopped the accounts from closing the position earlier. In my strategies, I have hard stopped built into the trades. For example, if I have a position that takes a loss of 8%, it closes the position, no questions asked. It protects me from scenarios like what was going on at MPC. However, I also have a way of manually closing positions if I see a news/event that would cause a sharp decline in my position. Something Bill and Victor would have definitely done once they saw the stories around the sector. As active managers they see things that quantitative algorithms don’t see.

the algorithm did that because taylor actively reworked it to make damaging decisions, not just because Algorithms Are Insufficient.

I really loved the callbacks to earlier seasons/episodes. Whether it was Axe jumping on the desk, his wearing a Metallica t-shirt, the Talyor Mason logo, or just the whole “caper” feel to the episode, I enjoyed the nostalgia!

talyor mason. sigh.

This season Taylor has talked several times about just wanting to keep making money and keep building their reputation. That Taylor would have jumped at the chance to do amazing and vicious things with Axe at Axe Global. But Taylor must certainly remember the last time they worked with/for Axe, and not with the fondest of memories. There was a reason Taylor stole Axe’s clients (and $3.5B of possible client funds) in Season 3. They both know that things start off well between them, then take a turn for the worst (which is usually Axe’s fault). They both have changed, but not enough to make it work. Taylor has always wanted to make money and do good. Axe just wants to make money. They both realize it, and I don’t think it was a surprise to Axe that Taylor wants to do their own thing. Why else would the Taylor Mason Foundation sign already be up at the old Axe Global offices? Axe knows people, and he didn’t have to mind-meld with Taylor, who I’ve compared to Mr. Spock many times, to know that was the path Taylor would take.

again: you don’t understand spock or kirk or vulcan mind melds and should never speak about any of them ever again.

Axe will always be my spirit animal,

don’t say that again either.

but the character of Taylor will always be the one I want to have on my team. I will really miss them.

i’ll hand it to you. once.

[thecandywrites]

Kinktober Day 27- Toys

Drumroll please....featuring Craig and Iris Foster! From my Magic and Miracles FFXV AU wher Iris is the former Iris Amicitia. and now married to her literal big hunk of a man, Craig. Who is like 6'6 and 400lbs of POWER. (He is both a strong man competitor and he's the other half of Foster and Foster Construction, a construction business he co-owns with his dad, Craig Foster Senior. Craig's uncle who is his dad's younger brother- and his wife- own Fosters Designs Incorporated where they design custom homes among other things where Selena works as a house designer/interior decorator. And Craig and Iris are building their dream house. Craig doing so, quite literally with his own two hands with lots of help from freinds and family.

Fun Fact. Craig is the only man alive that makes Gladio feel small. But they're cool and good brothers in law and Iris REALLY has a thing for the big strong but sweet and gentle type. Which Craig is the epitome of that. Also, look at that RING that is Sylva giving him a sweetheart deal because if her parents hadn't been in the hospital business, they would have been in the jewlery business. And would have been just as well known as the Winstons.

A billion and one thanks to @starsandskies for her Kinktober prompts. This is short and sweet. But only two more left and it's not December yet! Yay! Even though it is the middle of November. It still counts.

Kinktober Day 27- Toys

“So what new toys did you get me?” Iris asked as she giddily looked through the box that Craig had ordered, expecting to see a new piece of exercise equipment but to her surprise and delight, it wasn’t that kind of toy. 

It was vibrator that you wore in your underwear. The pure salaciously and practically evil giggle she made was both adorable yet, strangely, exciting for her husband Craig. 

“So when did you want to try it out?” Craig asked. 

“Right now!” She said. 

“It has to charge first.” Craig pointed to the fact that it was rechargeable. 

“Dang it.” Iris grumped before she impatiently unboxed it and plugged it in and whined when the light blinked red. 

“Come on, I need help with the house anyway. We can play with it when we get back.” Craig insisted as he urged his wife out of their condo and back to the house he was building for her. The basement was already dug, the foundations were poured, the framework was in place. It was getting it’s roof and the rest of the plumbing and electrical work was already in too as the windows were now being installed. And frankly Craig thought it was pretty awesome that not only did he get the materials for this house at cost, he actually got paid to build his own house. Granted along with all the houses he was still in the process of building for his other friends and family. But he took extra pride in this one as he had made sure that Iris would be perfectly happy with it and it would be a big enough house to fit him and his extra large size.

So Iris wasn’t disappointed for long as she helped make sure all the windows were installed correctly as she could still only imagine how great it was going to look once it was all done. Because the next step was drywall then floors, then paint then finishing work and then finally moving in with all the furniture, most of which was sitting in storage because they had gotten some amazing furniture on clearance. 

Then Craig got a call on his phone as he was in another room making sure the windows were installed correctly in there too before he came looking for his wife.

“Hey Hun? Pash and Gladio want to know if we want to go out to dinner. Mom just flew back from her trip with the boys and everyone else is meeting them at the steakhouse by the airport.” Craig informed her as he had the phone held to his chest. 

“Yes, of course, that sounds great.” She beamed. 

“I might need a shower first though.” She realized as she used her shirt to wipe off the sweat from her forehead. 

“Yup, we’ll be there.” Craig agreed as he and Iris got back into his truck and quickly drove home to get cleaned up and dressed as Iris put on just a bit of makeup too while Craig noticed that the toy was now fully charged and pocketed it as he downloaded the app and paired it with his own phone while she was in the bathroom. 

“Ready Babe?” Iris asked as she exited the bathroom, looking stunning as always since she had forgone the pixie cut and really let her hair grow out the older she got.

“Yup.” He smiled as he made sure the dogs were out in the yard before they got back in the truck. 

Once they got to the restaurant, Craig stood so that Iris and the other ladies could sit and wait for their large party to be seated before Regis came in carrying Alexis while Noct had Jaxon in his carseat from the car while Ignis had the diaper bag as a backpack on his back before Iris happily picked Jaxon up out of his carseat, and happily kissed his chubby cheeks and began talking some beautiful Spanish to him that he always seemed to like to hear as Craig simply smiled proudly to see Iris do so. She was going to be one hell of a good mom. When she was ready to be of course. 

So far they were with the couples who were waiting until thier houses were done before they started to expand their families, but others didn't seem to want to wait. Gladio and Pashmina had already had a little boy and a new baby girl and Pashmina was probably going to be pregnant with baby number three pretty soon. Luche and Ada had London and Ada was pregnant again, this time with a little girl as they were still figuring out baby names. And now with Noctis and Ignis adopting two children. Thier friend and family circle was still growing. And Luna and Nyx and Crowe and Libertus were back for a visit. With Crowe bringing Raven with her as Tredd was holding her and Raven just adored Tredd and did not want anyone but Tredd to hold her, which made Tredd happy and proud to see little Raven getting so big.

But Iris didn’t get to hold Jaxon for long before he wanted his grandmother to hold him as Sylva laughed as she took him from Iris and held him and cooed to him and rocked him before he could get a chance to even get fussy. Iris happily handed him over before she came and stood next to Craig who was still looking over a menu as he talked with the other guys before she felt something in his pocket between her hip and his leg. 

“What’s that?” Iris asked as she moved her hip around to feel a little better. 

“Your new toy. It was charged when we got home. Didn’t know if you’d…” Craig began to murmur to her quietly before she slyly pulled it out of his pocket and transferred it to her own purse. 

“Excuse me, I need to go to the bathroom.” She excused herself with a very giddy smile as she quickly went to the bathroom before she eagerly took it out and giggled evilly before she realized she didn’t have any lube and he hadn’t gotten the remote. 

“Aw,” Iris complained as she realized what was missing. 

“Everything ok?” Luna asked when she was in the next stall over. 

“No. Craig got me a new toy but forgot the remote.” Iris answered. 

“Can I see it?” She asked as she stuck her hand uder the stall wall divider in the bathroom before Iris handed it over. 

“Oh this doesn’t need one. It has an app. Nyx and I got one of these too. Here.” She handed it back before she passed one of her little bottles of lube.

“I don’t think I’ll need that.” Iris offered. 

“Trust me dinner is going to take at least an hour, you’ll need it. Just trust me on this.” Luna insisted.

“Ok fine.” Iris grabbed the little bottle and lubed up before she used toilet paper to wipe off her hands and to hand it back so lube wouldn’t get on outside of the bottle. 

“Ok, is it on?” Luna asked. 

“Yup.” 

“And now put it in.” Luna instructed. 

“In.” 

“Good, kegal that baby to keep it in as you stand and pull up your underwear if you’re wearing any and your jeans.” Luna coached before Iris did before she flushed and then left the stall to wash her hands. 

“Ok, now, let’s download the app.” Luna said before Iris got a text from Craig. 

‘Is it in?’ 

‘Yeah’ Iris texted back before Craig grinned rather deviously and turned it on. 

“Holy fucking shit!” Iris splurted as she grabbed ahold of the counter as the first jolt of pleasure came from within. 

“Ah, I see Craig has the app already on his phone.” Luna giggled herself. 

“Yeah, fuck, how does Stella do this with a straight face?” Iris asked right as Stella herself walked in. 

“Woah, you ok?” Stella asked Iris. 

“First time using a toy in public, Craig has the app.” Luna informed her. 

“Oh! Nice, which one?” She asked before Luna whispered the answer as Iris slowly tried to regain her composure. 

“Nice!” Stella laughed. 

“How do you do this all the time with a straight face?” Iris asked as she clenched her hands to the counter as she was breathing heavy. 

“Well first of all, don’t go full tilt the whole way, have him turn it down and then build up from there.” Stella coached. 

“Ok, ok.” Iris said as she texted Craig to turn the intensity down if he wanted her to come out of the bathroom at all before she breathed in relief when he turned it down to it’s lowest setting. 

“Oh, ok, that’s much better.” Iris blew out a breath of relief. 

“And that thing stays charged for a couple of hours. Please tell me you have lube.” Stella began. 

“Yeah, I gave her some.” Luna said. 

“Well, since you’re gonna have some fun, I am too.” Stella said before she purposefully got in her purse and got her matching one on and in before she texted Tredd that she was ‘free to play’ before Tredd smiled brightly and got into his own app and turned it on to Stella’s favorite programed sequence. 

“Oh yeah, that’s it.” Stella sighed happily before she came out and washed her hands too. 

Stella, Luna and Iris returned to the group just as they were getting seated as Iris sat next to Craig and gave him a meaningful look as she sat down and just as she was starting to get used to it, he turned it up. They barely got their drink orders in as Iris was happy to use the menu as a shield and couldn’t even figure out what she wanted to eat because she was pretty sure she was going to bite her lip in half to keep herself from squirming or grinding right there in the seat and thankfully by the time the waitress was ready to get her order, Iris was able to at least order for herself. 

By the time the appetizers came, Iris was eager to stuff food in her mouth to keep her from speaking or making any other noises as she felt her breathing pattern through her nose betrayed her but thankfully, Stella was laughing and telling jokes and carrying on and keeping all the attention on her so Iris wouldn’t feel that much more exposed or observed too closely. 

When the salad came, she was in the home stretch and when Craig went to grab for his phone, she immediately grabbed it out of his hands to keep him from changing it anymore and grabbed his arm so tight she nearly drew blood from her fingernails digging into the flesh of his forearm before he moved his arm down under the table and simply held her hand as she squeezed it as tight as she could before she pretended to look through her purse for some tylenol or something because of the almost pained expression she wore.

Then her drink was refilled and she only grinded a little in her seat as she finally rode out the orgasm before she got into his phone and turned it off before she made too much of a scene and blew out a breath of relief as her cheeks flushed but the tension in her lower back finally eased.

She gave Craig a look that said if he turned this blessed thing on again, she was going to stab him with her steak knife. Which got him to snort a laugh but nod that he was going to leave it alone until she was ready to "play" again.

She gave him the phone back as he bit his lips to keep his grin from spreading too far on his face and nodded in understanding before she looked over at Luna who gave her a questioning look before Iris gave her a subtle nod and the sublte thumbs up that she had cum before Luna gave her a thumbs up and nod of solidarity as Stella simply beamed proudly.

[art-of-manliness]

Odds and Ends: May 31, 2024

Reach Ultraclean Dental Floss. PFAS are “forever chemicals” that have been linked to thyroid disease, obesity, immune suppression, reproductive problems, and cancer. They’re used in things like carpets, cookware . . .  and, we recently learned, dental floss. A study found that those who use PFAS-containing floss have higher levels of the chemical in their bodies. This is, of course, correlational, and the use of such floss has not been proven to cause health effects. But heck, why keep using it if you don’t have to, since there are floss brands/types that don’t contain PFAS that might leech into your body? The trick is to find one that doesn’t feel like crap on your gums (PFAS are what give floss its nice glide). After deciding to switch from our old standby, PFAS-containing Oral B Glide, we discovered a winner of a replacement: Reach Ultraclean. Strong and rubbery, it doesn’t shred between your teeth, and it moves in and out of their gaps with a satisfying twang that makes flossing just a bit more enjoyable.  If you’ve wanted to, but haven’t yet made flossing in general a habit, you can bet we’ve got an article on that. The Social Network. I hadn’t seen this film since it originally came out almost 15 years ago and recently rewatched it with the family. It’s a great flick, which shrewdly frames the founding of Facebook as a story of a man seeking status (at the heart of everything, you’ll always, always find the fight for status). Jesse Eisenberg’s portrayal of Mark Zuckerberg is so well-acted, and Aaron Sorkin’s snappy dialogue of course crackles. Even though the main characters in the story don’t come off very well, it made me nostalgic for the early days of the web, when things were still new, exciting, and fun, people were scheming and dreaming about doing something big on the net, and college students could create things in their dorm room that became billion-dollar empires. It was a time for launches. (AoM debuted two years after FB opened to the general public. Memories.) “The Ambling Mind” by L. M. Sacasas. For some reason this year, I’ve naturally been waking up earlier. Instead of sitting around the house until the kids get up, I go out and take a two-mile walk around my neighborhood. I really enjoy it. This article by L.M Sacasas highlights one of the joys of walking outside: it’s a great way to think through things. There’s something about walking that juices your cognitive gears. Which is why many of history’s great philosophers like Aristotle, Kant, and Nietzsche were walkers. For more on the all-around powers of walking, check out this article we published a decade back: “Solvitur Ambulando: It Is Solved By Walking.” The Anatomy of Courage by Lord Moran. Charles McMoran Wilson, 1st Baron Moran, commonly known as Lord Moran, is most famous for being Winston Churchill’s personal physician from the period of WWII until Churchill’s death. But back in WWI, he served as a medical officer in the Royal Fusiliers for two and a half years. During that time, he closely observed how soldiers responded to the stresses of war. Moran offers interesting insights and opinions on what qualities make men more or less vulnerable to fear and susceptible to cowardice, and what conditions are apt to lead men to break down or hold together. Quote of the Week Life is too short to be little. Man is never so manly as when he feels deeply, acts boldly, and expresses himself with frankness and with fervor. —Benjamin Disraeli Help support independent publishing. Make a donation to The Art of Manliness! Thanks for the support! http://dlvr.it/T7ft2t

[allbeendonebefore]

in other news we get a holiday on monday

[qqueenofhades]

Keeping my fingers crossed for that Black Widow meta

Aha, okay. As usual, I am ludicrously easy to enable, so let's take a crack at this. The ask obviously contains SPOILERS for the Black Widow film (and is also tagged "black widow spoilers" if you're planning to filter), and discussion/reference to other films/properties in the MCU, though I don't feel like any of those are still a secret.

Anyway, as I said in my earlier post, I can't believe I am actually still trying to critically analyse a Marvel production in the year of our Lord 2021, but then, I feel like we all have a complicated relationship with it. Likewise, the feeling of "oh wow NOW you're giving Natasha a solo movie after you killed her off in a cheap and fairly sexist way in Endgame?" If this film had come out ten or even five years ago, it would have been major, but holding it off until now seems to have left most of us justifiably unimpressed. Plus, as I am absolutely not the first person to point out, it renders Natasha's sacrifice in Endgame "because I don't have a family" even more narratively incoherent. I realize that this film was written after that one by totally different people, there's no point in expecting the MCU to make consistent canonical sense throughout its eighty billion different films/series, we were all stuck with a mess after the Whedonified Age of Ultron Nat, and so forth, but still. Natasha explicitly SAYS that she has two families (her wacky Russian found family of spies and the Avengers) and her decision to leap off the cliff in Endgame to save Clint and his retconned perfect white heterosexual nuclear family.... Hmmmm. To which I say to you, I do not bite my thumb at you, sir, but I do bite my thumb at Male Writers, sir.

Likewise, while I am wildly attracted to Florence Pugh as Yelena and deeply desire to be wrapped between her thighs, the movie felt more like her story than Nat's. Yelena drove most of the plot and the action, while Nat was just kind of along for the ride. As a solo piece, we really didn't learn that much about Natasha aside from the opening scene (which felt like it was straight out of The Americans and probably worked the best of the whole film for the reason) with her childhood in America. But even the infamous "what happened in Budapest" backstory with her and Clint was quickly info-dumped rather than shown, and they could have taken more narrative risks or included more flashbacks or otherwise given us more NATASHA, y'know??? Instead of cramming the film into the small space between Civil War and Infinity War and making it even weirder that Nat seemingly has no memory or reference to these events when she returns to the team at that time. Why not show her looking for Yelena or her actual defection to the Avengers or anything else we might want from a film that purportedly exists entirely to provide backstory for a now-dead character? It felt like even in the film universe, the main quest was being repeated -- she tried to kill Baddie McSoviet once before and it didn't work out, so she has to do it again, something something. Okay.

As for that, good ol' Marvel and its American Superiority TM. The only actual Eastern European actress in this film about Eastern Europeans was Antonia/Taskmaster, played by the Ukrainian Olga Kurylenko (and I was very interested in her?? If she's supposed to be a narrative foil and a ghost of Nat's past and mark of her former sins, etc., why not develop her as an actual character?) Everyone else were Brits and Americans hamming it up with even more chew-the-scenery fake Russian accents than Elizabeth Olsen's "Sokovian" accent as Scarlet Witch. If it's established that they all have perfect American accents at the start of the movie, why is Nat the only American-accented character in the modern day if she had presumably the exact same childhood as Yelena? I know it's another way to set her apart, but that and Baddie McSoviet (the Russians are finding a way to steal free will from people's brains! Zomgz!!! Is this 2021 or 1981?) were straight out of the Cold War in terms of its not-so-veiled American Supremacy Message. Likewise, making modern!Natasha a former KGB agent never really made sense, since she says in Winter Soldier that she was born in 1984, and we see her in this film as an 11-year-old in 1995. But the USSR collapsed in 1991, when she was seven, and the Red Room appears to be an entirely unrelated flying....lab....thingy run by a generic evil Russian (Ray Winstone, likewise Hamming Up Accent). So like. What is she, guys?? Make up your minds!!!

Likewise, Baddie McSoviet/Dreykov as a villain obviously plays into the hoary old Hollywood "All Bad People Are Recognizable As Being Terrible Sexists and Also Probably Russians" trope, but aside from that, he doesn't make sense. He has this entire army of basically unstoppable Widows and he has just been.... waiting around and causing random explosions? Or was just waiting for Nat and company to return so he could Put His Evil Plan Into Motion? Are we really supposed to believe that this guy has just been sitting up in his flying saucer and essentially never doing anything this whole time? He had about a million chances to launch this take-over-the-world plan long before Natasha ever got there. Plus, I.... am.... not sure what to think (aside from /deep sigh/ MARVEL) about the fact that all the Widows we see dying/getting killed on screen are women of color. (Then the Black surgeon who was about to remove Yelena's brain in the Red Room and the only other Black guy being Natasha's errand boy, which just... in context... YIKES.) I think the fact that there are random Black background Widows are supposed to mean that they're inclusive and badass or something? Scarlett Johansson also has her own issues with White Feminism and all the other things we've critiqued her for before, so after TFATWS and the Flag Smashers, Marvel clearly has found its subtly racist sweet spot. As usual?

The end of the film also just basically turns into the standard Marvel empty-spectacle/cool-looking fights/people flying through the air thing, and I wanted a lot more focus on the wacky found-family Russian-spy hijinks (I did love them, for reasons) and character dynamics, rather than all of them separately fighting baddies in different places. I did obviously have feelings about Natasha putting the parachute on Yelena to save her life. But why were we then denied Nat/Gamora parallels/relationships/any character development or interaction at all in Infinity War/Endgame? Both of them are trained assassins adopted into a non-biological family that they have a complicated relationship with, but end up forging a strong bond with their sister (Yelena/Nebula) nonetheless. Of course, that would have required Endgame to put more effort into its female characters than what it did, which was one (1) Epic CGI Charge Scene at the very end, and literally nothing else. Not that I am still salty about this or anything.

Anyway. The movie was genuinely fun in places. The wacky Russian found family of spies was definitely the best part, even if it made Endgame even more nonsensical as a result. But I wanted this movie to be a lot better than it was overall, though I probably would have liked it more if it had actually come out in a timely fashion and wasn't only released after they killed her off. It just feels like there were so many possible threads of potential that could have been done with Natasha if they were actually interested in experimenting and exploring the character and not just coming up with new baddies and ways to go boom, and it unfortunately missed the mark with that.

[foundadventures]

Those who would trade our freedom for the soup kitchen of the welfare state have told us they have a utopian solution of peace without victory. They call their policy "accommodation." And they say if we'll only avoid any direct confrontation with the enemy, he'll forget his evil ways and learn to love us. All who oppose them are indicted as warmongers. They say we offer simple answers to complex problems. Well, perhaps there is a simple answer - not an easy answer but simple: If you and I have the courage to tell our elected officials that we want our national policy based on what we know in our hearts is morally right.

We cannot buy our security, our freedom from the threat of the bomb by committing an immorality so great as saying to a billion human beings now enslaved behind the Iron Curtain, "Give up your dreams of freedom because to save our own skins, we're willing to make a deal with your slave masters." Alexander Hamilton said, "A nation which can prefer disgrace to danger is prepared for a master, and deserves one." Now let's set the record straight. There's no argument over the choice between peace and war, but there's only one guaranteed way you can have peace - and you can have it in the next second - surrender.

Admittedly, there's a risk in any course we follow other than this, but every lesson of history tells us that the greater risk lies in appeasement, and this is the specter our well-meaning liberal friends refuse to face, that their policy of accommodation is appeasement, and it gives no choice between peace and war, only between fight or surrender. If we continue to accommodate, continue to back and retreat, eventually we have to face the final demand, the ultimatum. And what then, when Nikita Khrushchev has told his people he knows what our answer will be? He has told them that we're retreating under the pressure of the Cold War, and someday when the time comes to deliver the final ultimatum, our surrender will be voluntary, because by that time we will have been weakened from within spiritually, morally, and economically. He believes this because from our side he's heard voices pleading for "peace at any price" or "better Red than dead," or as one commentator put it, he'd rather "live on his knees than die on his feet." And therein lies the road to war, because those voices don't speak for the rest of us.

You and I know and do not believe that life is so dear and peace so sweet as to be purchased at the price of chains and slavery. If nothing in life is worth dying for, when did this begin - just in the face of this enemy? Or should Moses have told the children of Israel to live in slavery under the pharaohs? Should Christ have refused the cross? Should the patriots at Concord Bridge have thrown down their guns and refused to fire the shot heard 'round the world? The martyrs of history were not fools, and our honored dead who gave their lives to stop the advance of the Nazis didn't die in vain. Where, then, is the road to peace? Well it's a simple answer after all.

You and I have the courage to say to our enemies, "There is a price we will not pay." "There is a point beyond which they must not advance." And this - this is the meaning in the phrase of Barry Goldwater's "peace through strength." Winston Churchill said, "The destiny of man is not measured by material computations. When great forces are on the move in the world, we learn we're spirits - not animals." And he said, "There's something going on in time and space, and beyond time and space, which, whether we like it or not, spells duty." You and I have a rendezvous with destiny.

We'll preserve for our children this, the last best hope of man on earth, or we'll sentence them to take the last step into a thousand years of darkness.

Reagan delivered this speech 58 yrs ago. Amazing how it still rings true today.

[coreastories]

Modern Royals: The King’s White Day declaration

If you live in Corea and you’re a man, you probably have a burning resentment for the king always raising the bar when it comes to romantic gestures. 

For my international readers-- and let’s face it, most of my readers are international because I write in English, although some ahjummas have taken to using translation apps on my articles, just to make sure I’m accurate and/or have used what they “educated me about...”

Anyway, White Day is a special day you only see in a tiny portion of Asia

Japan started it, and Corea and Taiwan also do it. China, Vietnam and Singapore also do it to some extent

While the Western world pampers women on Valentine’s Day, it’s quite the opposite here, where men receive chocolates and confessions of love from women

It’s gotten so widespread that it’s become a standard in schools and workplaces, to the extent that “giri-choko” or obligation chocolates exist 

These are the chocolates you had to hand out to your male colleagues, relatives, friends

Apparently, you can give cheaper varieties for these people. The more expensive the chocolate, the more special the guy will perceive himself to be. It’s a game of finesse, of not leaving anyone out, making sure your recipient feels appreciated (especially the sunbaes and bosses) but making sure no one gets the wrong message either 

White Day is a reverse Valentine’s Day. It’s the women’s turn to receive chocolates and gifts from the men

And men are expected to give four times the value of what they received on Valentine’s Day

Many workplaces pool their money to buy packages of good chocolates for their women colleagues

In Corea, despite dwindling support for obligation chocolate, romantic chocolate persists. Chocolate sales reach billions of won on Valentine’s Day, and this triples on White Day.

Stores create special White Day chocolates, and advertisements and online reservations start as early as January.

White Day this year was full of queen-themed chocolates. Crown shapes, real gold flecks, the plum blossom inspired by the Royal Court’s insignia and Her Majesty’s necklace and signature forget-me-not blue color dominated the designs that flew off the shelves before they were even placed there.

Specific hashtags on Instagram were full of posts of these chocolates and photos of guys waiting in line to pick up their reservations for a Godiva box of Crown Jewels, a limited edition White Day 2021 box of chocolates quilted in the distinct Chanel pattern, which is now a trademark of the queen so often seen wearing her Coco Crush earrings or rings. 

Chocopologie’s House of Knipschildt also created Sa Majesté Truffle, very similar to their Guinness Record-holder La Madeline au Truffle, except this one contains a delicate strawberry and edible gold candy in the shape of the queen’s plum blossom pink diamond necklace. 

This is made to order, and sources say Chocopologie had to close orders from Corea when it reached 2700 pieces. That $350 per truffle. 

Delafee sold out their Plum Blossom Chocolate and Gold Lollipops in seconds, and their 24-karat Gold Chocolate Box with a collectible solid gold coin bearing the Royal Court’s plum blossom insignia, retailing at $899, sold out in one day.  

Coreans snapped them up. These were the gifts to be had. Men thought they were pretty much in the clear in pleasing their women. 

Until photos came out of the queen wearing the legendary J12 X-ray, made almost entirely in sapphire crystal. 

The J12 X-ray and its transparent sapphire crystal face and 5.46 carats of baguette diamonds, with the gear train seemingly suspended in midair

Aside from the watch hands, train wheels, mainspring, metal hinges and components, if the parts aren’t sapphire crystal, it’s diamond, and where it’s not made of diamond, it’s in white gold. The hour markers are diamonds. The bezel is diamond. The face and bracelet are all sapphire crystal. 

As it often goes in Corean media, the photos zooming in on the queen’s wrist were immediately taken down. For security purposes, and some ahjummas said it’s so the queen’s bespoke watch won’t be imitated. 

There are only twelve of these watches to be made in the world, and aside from the queen of Corea, we have not yet seen it on anyone else. The availability is still TBA. 

Sapphire crystal bracelet, plate and bridges. The luxury and rarity comes from the difficulty and expense of machining and working with sapphire crystal, the second hardest material next to diamonds.  

It’s so fitting that royalty is the first to be seen with this watch, and not just any royalty, but the queen of Corea, who does seem to like Chanel watches. 

See our Queens Day Recap, where the queen wore the Chanel Boyfriend watch. 

Here’s Her Majesty photographed wearing the J12 Phantom last year 

And I think the king’s in trouble, because I rather think the queen had no idea she was wearing $626,000 on her wrist when she and the king appeared at the UAAC Baseball season pre-opening friendly match.  

The Prime Minister was also there, along with CorGen Obstetrics Chief Chae Song-eun, the queen’s OB. 

The Royal Public Affairs Office declined to comment, but in his monthly televised panel today with the Ministries of Finance and Commerce, the press asked His Majesty about the watch as the meeting wound down, and the king answered it with laughter.    

“I did hear that men are furious with me? I’m sorry but the watch is very much the queen’s style. The sapphire crystal means the band and the watch face are indestructible. I happen to choose Her Majesty’s accessories in that criteria. 

“If you can afford to buy your wife and the mother of your child an expensive gift, why not? This country owes a lot to its women--don’t forget we have a Queens Day because we owe our queens so much-- give them expensive gifts! The most expensive you can afford without bankrupting yourself and getting yourself killed by your wife, of course.”

Seeing as the king is very much alive and his blissfully happy self as ever, we can assume the queen has forgiven him. 

And now I bet all the luxury brands in the world are gearing up with their own sapphire crystal and/or timepiece offerings. 

And while the J12 X-ray’s price is astronomical, I have to agree with the king that it’s definitely the queen’s style. That is to say, it’s absolutely wearable, unlike the million dollar diamond watches Harry Winston, Cartier, Chopard and their ilk have made. 

We do wonder what the queen has given the king for Valentine’s Day, but perhaps bearing the heir to the Corean throne is beyond enough. 

Our countdown to that happy day continues! 

[alex-fucking-dempsey]

hi love! you don’t have to but could you write a zalex fic during the camping trip where after everyone finds out about winston and alex zach checks on him and they have this super cute moment where they’re like just looking at the stats/moon? kinda like the clannah scene in s1

The Same Person That I Need is The One I'm Running From

    The woods were still, they were quiet except for the occasional who-ing of owls, the rustles of the leaves, the movement of fabric as people moved in their sleep. Alex had been lying awake, he was freezing and heartbroken. Alex had his big yellow jacket on as well as being wrapped up like a burrito in his sleeping bag. He sighed, he felt so fucking betrayed and used and disgusting. He can’t believe he was played and lied to like that, he ran a hand down his face and That’s when he heard the crack of a stick right next to his tent. He saw the shadow of someone right next to his tent, his heartbeat quickened, what if it was a murderer. Alex decided he had faced scarier in his short 17-years of living and took a deep breath, waiting for the figure to go away, slowly the shadow moved towards the front of Alex and his father’s tent, then he heard a small “Alex,” He knew exactly who it was when he heard the voice, he rolled his eyes at the antics of the boy. He unzipped his sleeping bag quietly before crawling towards the front of the tent, unzipping the zippered up entrance. Seeing a familiar goofy and lopsided smile, Zach Dempsey, worlds resident sweetheart, Alex’s best friend. 

    “What do you want?” Alex said peeking his head through the entrance, he realized how close he was to Zach’s face, Alex flushed backing up from the entrance. 

    “Come out here with me,” He smiled. Alex nodded, wearily. He never needed much of reason to go with Zach, he would follow him into a void if he smiled at him like that. He zipped the tent back up before turning around and facing the boy who dragged him out of his deep and heavy thoughts. “Okay, I’m out here what do you want Dempsey?” Alex said folded his arms across his chest, his eyebrows raised.

    “Can’t a man tell his best friend to wake up without wanting anything?” Alex rolled his eyes, looking at him expectedly. A small paused, Zach, said more carefully, “I heard what happened…” 

    Alex sighed walking away from Zach and the campsite, it was no one’s business. He was furious with the way news of the two of them had got around not only was he furious about that it had gotten around but that it had reached Zach, the one person he deliberately didn’t want to know. Zach had followed him wordlessly. 

    “I’m okay, you know…”

    “I can’t believe that when the last time you said-” Zach inched closer to the boy in front of him with a frown painted on his lips.

    “I know…” Alex whispered. He let out a loud exhale, “I really am okay, Zach,” He said turning away from Zach, he knew he’d see the lie in his face if he saw it. 

    “I can tell you’re not…” He said crossing his arms, “You think I can’t hear it in your voice?”

    “Well, what about you huh?!” Alex’s voice crack, he felt like crying. He turned sharply in the direction of Zach.

    “What about me?” 

    “You obviously aren’t okay,” Alex ran looked down at his shoes, “Stop caring about other people and care about yourself for once, asshole!” He rolled his eyes, looking away from Zach.

    “I want to show you something,” Alex squinted his eyes a little taken back by the boy’s words, wordlessly, he nodded, Zach took the lead, the walk was awkward and uncomfortable. It was filled with the boys breathing, and the sound of twigs snapping underneath their weight. They came to a cliff, that overlooked the lake, the stars were brighter than Alex had ever seen. The small waves crashed on the shore, Alex thought it was rather peaceful. 

    Zach wordless walked towards the edge which caused Alex’s heart rate to speed up, although Zach didn’t completely sit at the edge, he sat closer to where the two were standing. Zach patted the hard ground next to him as a signal for him to come and sit next to him, Alex hesitantly took the gesture sitting down next to him with a groan. Zach looked up at the sky, then back at Alex. “I care about you, man,” Zach said in a small voice, “I’m sorry he used you,” Alex shifted uncomfortably looking out at the lake. 

    Alex furrowed his brows together, “I just…” Alex had a lot of frustration bubbling inside him. He was so hurt that people continue to use him, first Jessica, then Winston when does he get a fucking break. He let out a loud exhale, “Why do people do this me?” He said sadness and confusion filled his voice as he tucked his knees into his chest, he started to shake as the tears he’s held in almost all day were released. Zach hesitantly put a hand on his smaller counterparts shoulder, making the boy jump as a reaction, Zach felt him ease up underneath his touch. He sniffed loudly, before looking up wiping his tears on the sleeve of the yellow jacket. He laughed although, it was bitter and cold, completely void of humor. “Why am I not good enough for anyone, Zach?” He had his head on his arms that were on top of his knees, he moved it to look at Zach. His face was red, not in anger or embarrassment may be from the cold or the crying Zach couldn’t tell but all he wanted to do at that moment was make sure he was safe.

    Zach sighed, looking up at the stars twinkling back at him, “They fucked up,” He shook his head, “You don’t deserve that… No one deserves this, especially not you,” 

    “It happens so many fucking times why wouldn’t I deserve this I fucking killed a man!” 

    Zach was stunned into silence all he could do was look at the stars. “Do you believe in fate?”

    “That’s for dumbasses of course not,” 

    “Gee thanks,” Zach chuckled bumping their shoulders together. Alex just rolled his eyes and continued to look at the water crashing up against the shoreline. “I do…” 

    “Hence it being for dumbasses,” 

    “Fuck off, Standall,” Zach’s goofy grin. Alex thinks it may be his favorite smile he’s ever seen but he doesn’t dwell on the thought for very long, he already knows loud and fucking clear how Zach feels. 

    “Why?” 

    “Hm?”

    “Why’d you ask if I believed in fate?” Zach was silent again, he was silent for almost two minutes before he took a good look at Alex, then back at the stars. 

    “Do you think if we wouldn’t have killed him someone else would have? I think about it sometimes like maybe… If he didn’t die at the hands of us it was fate for him to die that night?” 

    Alex pondered the question, he didn’t like thinking about Bryce. It made him physically ill- he had blood on his hands that no matter how hard he scrubbed, no matter how many times he’s washed his hands- they are stained with the blood of Bryce Walker. “Isn’t that taking the easy way out?”

    “I guess so,” Zach stretched back putting his hands behind him as he watches the stars, he loved how beautiful and collected they were, he was envious of flaming balls of gas. “But still… You know, we aren’t the only ones who wanted to kill him I mean there was like a hundred suspects before they narrowed it down to us.” 

    Alex mulled that thought over, “I mean I guess you aren’t wrong, he was a piece of shit.” Zach nodded. A thick blanket of silence and tension fell over them. “How’d you know?”

    “About you and Winston?” Alex nodded slowly, “Ani and Clay told us about Winston Jessica told me that you guys were you know…” 

    “Making out?” Alex deadpanned, “Truth be told,” Alex said getting into the same position as Zach, “I never hooked up with him,”

    “Why?” Zach blurted out before he could keep his big dumb mouth shut, “I-I mean…”

    “I don’t want to have sex with people who I’m unsure of…” 

    “When did you become such a sap,” 

    Alex just rolled his eyes looked away from him, “Shut up, it doesn’t even matter he didn’t even like me anyway,” Alex said rather bitterly yet he was still playful. He felt a pinky brush his own he knew it was Zach’s- neither of them made an effort to move their hands so they kept their pinkies overlap.

    “He’s a fool,” Zach shrugged, now at this point, Zach’s hand was on top of Alex’s smaller one neither cared to move it. Reason three billion and four why Alex thought Zach liked him- the two of them could be hanging out and Zach and he would basically be holding the hands of each other and not say a single word and leave their hands there. “You are an amazing person, Alex,” 

    Alex just nodded, the two savored the silence as they looked at the sky. The night sky wasn’t completely clear it had small clouds moving passed the stars, quickly. Alex loved to watch the sky so intently he’d be able to see the world spin. Alex laid his head on Zach’s shoulder, “I’m obviously fucking not Zach…  I have a hole in my head, I have this dumbass limp, I mean look at me I’m so fucking ugly it’s no wonder why people leave…” He was just ranting out loud, but what he had said had hurt Zach’s own feelings. 

    His brows scrunched together, “I don-”

    “Zach, you opinion doesn’t matter you’re my best friend you’re supposed to say these things.”

    “No, I’m not I could agree with you but they aren’t true, I mean sure yeah you shot yourself so? You’re still just as beautiful as before if not more so, there is beauty in pain you know,” 

`    Alex sighed. He had no idea why Zach insisted on saying these things about him. He felt hurt in a way that he is allowed to say these things and also not reciprocate the feelings Alex has. He couldn’t wrap his head around why Zach did things like this. “We should head back,”

    Zach shook his head, “No one is calling us, let’s just enjoy the stars.”

    “Are you some sort of astrologist?” 

    “No, but sometimes- like right now, it’s peaceful… Like it’s just eh two of us,” 

    “Would you like that?” Zach looked away, Alex, didn’t take back his words nor his hand. 

    “I would, yeah.” 

    Yet, another thing to add on Alex’s running tally of reasons why he loves Zach, “Me too,” 

    Zach nodded as he hesitantly intertwined the two’s fingers neither one of them pulled away, they just stared at the stars in comfortable silence, just the two of them. 

[unproduciblesmackdown]

the way this is just lighting up the board hitting the Winston (Billions) points. the way it's from a survey about autistic experiences with perceived dehumanization.

[neverheardnothing]

Is billions worth to watch?

man that’s the billion fucking dollar question isn’t it.

well it depends on what you’re trying to get out of it and i’ll break it down into 3 different levels. i am assuming you’re a will fan since you’re sending this to me but i guess you could also be a random person who has seen me posting in the billions tag. anyways here we go.

1. you are legitimately interested in watching a show

regardless of who is in it. basic rundown is that billions is a show about a cat and mouse game between a hedge fund ceo and a government attorney. every single character in this show is a terrible person who does terrible things to get what they want (with a few exceptions). what they want might be for “good” like stopping other shit people from doing their terrible things, but they do shit things to try to get there. that’s part of the fun and drama. there are a few characters who feel Bad when they do shit things and the moral quandary they go is another added level of fun to watch.

i, personally, do not have a fun time watching this, but have heard that the appeal of watching the show is that you get to see terrible people be terrible to each other. expect character to go out the window for insane plot reasons. don’t try to think too hard about anything that happens because the answer is almost always simply just because. since this show is on showtime, they get to say and do some very Explicit rated stuff. the opening scene of the show is a guy getting pissed on by a dominatrix. the characters get to say fuck. a lot.

basically if you want to turn your brain off and watch a ridiculous, unrealistic drama going at 100 mph, rich people flaunting their wealth, and characters saying absolutely buckshit wild things like it’s normal then go for it. it’s not a show to be in the fandom for. it’s a show to binge watch as fast as you can and think back on in several months with slight fondness like “oh yeah, billions. i watched that show in two weeks and havent thought about it since, but it was absolutely fucking insane. good times.” that’s how people should enjoy this show if they want to imo.

2. you are here for will roland but you also want to understand what happens in the plot/interested in taylor mason

then i can direct you to this VERY handy link called the taylist (made by yours truly) named after one of the deuteragonists of the show, taylor mason (asia kate dillon), who is winston’s (will roland) boss. this playlist contains (my best attempt at getting) every scene taylor is in.

taylor is one of those characters who does bad things and feels bad about it mentioned earlier and for me it’s agonizing to watch since I Care Them. asia kate dillon is a ridiculously good actor so it’s hard not to feel for taylor. they come into the show in season 2.

you don’t miss much in season 1. chuck (government attorney) tries to get well liked billionaire axe (hedge fund ceo) in trouble by proving he is trading on inside information (illegal). the drama comes in when wendy, chuck’s wife, is also the performance coach at axe capital. the season progresses. axe tells wendy something that if revealed could get him in trouble. chuck breaks into wendy’s computer and uses it as evidence. wendy and chuck separate for the time being and wendy quits working for axe. chuck and axe have a confrontation in the axe cap offices where they end up in a giant screaming match. and that’s about it.

other worthwhile characters introduced in season 1 are ben kim and dudley mafee, both analysts at axe cap. ben is your stereotypical nice and meek asian math guy but over the course of the show he starts growing a backbone. mafee is a dudebro and kinda himboish and in season 2 he is the one who hires taylor as an intern.

3. you are here for will roland

no. it is absolutely not worth the watch, at least right now, but i kind of doubt it’ll ever be. most of us here for will roland have not seen the entire show (with a few exceptions) and we’re doing just fine in our winstannery lol. if you want to be extra and go for it, that’s fine, but it’s definitely not required.

will appears in 13/60 episodes and has about half an hour of screen time. his first appearance is in 3x03 and was intended to be a one-off character (quant kid #2), but apparently wrol Killed It and hit it off with asia kate dillon so much that the writers invited him back to become a recurring character. his next scenes were written while he was on set for his initial one day shoot, and you can really tell because at least for the rest of season 3, they really continue to deliver on that good asia kate dillon and will roland acting together content.

he was in 6/7 of the episodes that have aired so far in season 5 and we’re pretty sure that he will be in the rest of the episodes, as apparently the reason he wasn’t in more of season 4 was because he was busy with be more chill. chances are pretty high for him being in a lot of season 6 as it stands now.

here’s every bit of content he’s been in.

season 3-4

season 5 episode 1

season 5 episode 2

season 5 episode 3

season 5 episode 5

season 5 episode 6

season 5 episode 7

[broadway-heere-i-come]

Oh man do you know how fucking badly I want an episode of Billions to do that shit where everybody goes out for drinks after work at a karaoke bar and somebody (probably Rian) is like “Winston you should sing something” and Winston is like “No I can’t sing” but then everyone heckles him into getting up onstage and then he absolutely crushes it and of course the whole thing is just an excuse to show off Will Roland’s voice for three minutes but afterwards all the characters’ minds are blown and they all have a newfound respect for Winston and his hidden talent

[nothingunrealistic]

new information from that 7x04 call sheet:

7x04 is written by lio sigerson, who cowrote 6x04 burn rate and 6x08 the big ugly with brian koppelman & david levien, and directed by john dahl, who directed 1x08 boasts and rails, 3x04 hell of a ride, 3x06 the third ortolan, and 5x03 beg, bribe, bully.

babak tafti, who had a lead role in super pumped season 1, will be in billions season 7 as a new character, bradford luke. last month daniel k. isaac posted a selfie with babak tafti captioned “SUPER PUMPED & now #Billions Family,” so this isn’t too surprising. in this episode, luke will try to stop prince from taking some course of action and will fail because he “has no veto power.”

scooter will get the chance to conduct a musical ensemble (tying back to telling philip in 6x05 that he could have been a conductor “for real”) and prince cappers will be there to watch.

chuck & allerd will return to the us attorney’s office for the southern district of new york and work against prince from there. in this episode, this will involve someone named kai huang liu (see: the photo double casting call for “kai sr”) and a kid who flees the law until prince convinces him to turn himself in.

the dollar bill photo double/stand-in will appear in this episode.

questions raised by the call sheet:

who exactly is bradford luke and what is he failing to veto? how big will his role in the season be?

is prince hanging out at prince capital because 1) he’s still running the fund day-to-day despite ostensibly handing over the reins to philip and taylor, 2) he’s using it as his operating base for his presidential run and other projects, or 3) he wants everyone to cheer and clap for scooter and this is the best place to do it?

how on earth did chuck get back into the us attorney’s office after being fired from there and from his subsequent job as the nyag *and* supposedly being indicted? what happened to dave’s plan for him to go after prince under cover of disgrace? is his office a supply closet in the back of the building?

who’s the kid that’s hiding out on prince’s plane until he turns himself in, and is he connected to the kai huang liu case? is he, perhaps, kai huang liu junior? or is there no connection? why is he unnamed and not listed on the call sheet with the other actors?

given that dollar bill, rian, chuck, and allerd are in this episode, where are mafee, winston, sacker, and dave? i can understand dave not being on here, since none of the scenes listed happen at the nyag’s office, but why wouldn’t sacker and winston be at what seems like an all-hands prince cap meeting, and why would dollar bill be there if mafee isn’t? for that matter, why isn’t wags in those scenes despite being listed on the call sheet?

if my newly-acquired understanding of call sheet abbreviations is correct, this day of shooting was the last day that asia kate dillon, kelly aucoin, daniel k. isaac, louis cancelmi, eva victor, and dhruv maheshwari worked on this episode, despite it being only day 3 of an 11-day shoot. is the prince cap ensemble barely present in this episode, or were the first two days of shooting jam-packed?

[cockbiteproductions]

6 and 9

nice

6. Episode of tv or webisode that defined the year for you?

I thought a lot about this question and I’ve narrowed it down to 3 answers which are posted here in experienced order:

Daredevil 1x10 Nelson v. Murdock - i rewatched all of daredevil with my roommate during the quarantine part of the spring semester and had a blast. foggy finds out matt’s secret (being a superhero, his super senses). the Betrayal of it all. the way they show them ugly crying instead of like letting out a single man tear. fuck. “then again, maybe i would. what the hell do i know about matt murdock?” the cutting back and forth between their present day fallout and their meeting and developing friendship. it’s SOOO much it’s like Specifically Crafted for maximum pain and i eat it right up. foggy: are u even really blind? the show: *immediately cuts to a flashback of them meeting and foggy learning that matt is blind* foggy: was anything ever real between us? the show: *cuts to the two of them thick as thieves and making plans to form their law firm together and matt almost revealing his secret*. matt: this city needs me in that mask, foggy. foggy: maybe you’re right. maybe it does. but i don’t. i only ever needed my friend. the show: *cuts to them starting their law firm together.* also the scene where ben is in the hospital with his wife and we see her forget him on screen. ouch. a lot happens in this episode but tbh i just focus on the Friendship Falling Out. it reads even better if you think they’re in love with each other, as i obviously do. man daredevil Hurts.

Star Wars: The Clone Wars 7x12 Victory and Death (series finale) - the panic in rex and ahsoka as they have to get off this LITERAL sinking ship filled with enemies that used to be their brothers, who had just within the week painted their armor, one of the few things they can customize to express themselves, to resemble her, who they know would never willingly turn against them, and a fucking wackjob killer wildcard. the growing tension and cornering is fantastic. when ahsoka takes off rex’s helmet and he cries because he’s facing killing his brothers. the cute droid squad. i’m always a sucker for non-humans. the fact that they had special orders to kill ahsoka, who was no longer a jedi, from palpatine, meaning he thought she was a threat still and she IS. she’s up there with obi-wan in terms of attachments anakin has. the action is truly epic (though i do have to say the maul ahsoka fight was better). the fact that ahsoka and rex didnt just leave the clones there and they dug graves for them. the shot of ahsoka in her cloak in front of all the helmets painted like her face on sticks will be burned into my brain forever. vader coming down to the planet himself much later and finding and igniting one of the sabers he as anakin LITERALLY remade for her. just the image of vader holding a blue lightsaber is going to be the death of me. a literal representation of who he was. it’s too much. it’s too much for me to deal with. i started crying as i was typing this. also when you look closely you can see his eyes through the helmet lens. it hurts man. (possibly) morai flying away as this happens. man, star wars can be good. 

Supernatural 6x20 The Man Who Would Be King - ok so i know the question said year but man has show really defined my like last two months. as for this eps specifically, im predictable is what this says. i like tragedy and unhappy endings. i like gay angel. i like self-aware narration. i like reflection. i like the moment before it all goes wrong. this episode is the literal point of no return for s6 cas and i want to scream. it’s like when anakin cuts off mace windu’s hand. “but cas, youll call right? if you get into real trouble?” “and the worst part was dean, trying so hard to be loyal.” “for a brief moment, i was myself again.” “wonders never cease, they trusted me again.” “of course, i didn’t realize it at the time, but it was all over, right then, just like that.” “the big lie, the winchesters still buy it. the good cas, the righteous cas, and long as they still believe it, you get to believe it.” “it sounds so simple when you say it like that. where were you when i needed to hear it? / i was there. where were you?” “you know the difference between you and me? i know what i am. what are you, castiel? what exactly are you willing to do?” “i believe it’s what you would call a... tragedy from the human perspective... i’m asking you, father, one last time. am i doing the right thing? am i on the right path? you have to tell me. you have to give me a sign, because if you don’t... i’m gonna do whatever i... whatever i must.” like are you kidding me. not to talk about star wars even more but like. when rots novel said “the blurred line between our best and our worst” hhhhh. this makes me crave a 150k fic from cas’ perspective in season 6 where we see all the terrible things he’s doing for his well intentioned plan and how he keeps digging himself in deeper and deeper until it’s too late. and if i had the skill and time i would write it. alas.

runner ups: billions 5x05 contract (the epic lows of hearing taylor say they wanted to fire winston, the epic highs of 4d chess theory. the shitpost memes i immediately made. did not make the list as i made it a requirement that i actually enjoy the content in my winners list). supernatural 15x18 despair (lost out to man who would be king because i Care Cas, but i will never get over cas going out the way he came into this show; calling dean OUT on his bullshit).

9. Best month for you this year?

bro who can even remember the months. ok i just looked at my calendar and i guess i’ll say may. i finished up my spring semester the week before. clone wars finale aired then and billions season 5 started airing which was a “fun” time. had a job. things were alright.

[darnloveablecharacters]

Universal, Part Four: What Have I Done

Series Summary: Simply a multi-part, self indulgent reader insert with John Wick universe kinda plumbed in. Fair warning…. SLOWWW BURN. Ignore canon and timing and crap, that’s not important….  Gifs and recognizable characters are not mine, but the story and all of the mistakes are!

The Universal - Masterlist

Chapter Notes: I re-wrote this like 50 billion times. I knew roughly what I wanted to happen here, but the execution was a struggle. I hope I made the right choice in this version and hope y’all enjoy it! On a side note, I actually had to stop myself from calling this chapter “WTF Obi Wan?”

Warnings for this chapter: Where do we begin? Blood, violence, mad rage, character death, angst... *phew*

The Clone Wars have been raging on.

They were on a remote planet in the outer rim and were laying siege to a Separatist base. It was their mission to ensure the Separatists did not escape while Anakin and Ahsoka infiltrated and gathered intel. As transport after attempted to leave… the Republic shot them down. So far, there had been no casualties that they were aware of.

Obi Wan stood in the command room with his eyes closed as her energy flowed through him. The comfort that her presence gave him came as a shock. He hadn’t seen her since that night at The Universal, but she was here now and he knew that would change.

Cody ran to him and gave yet, another, report. “There is another transport leaving, Sir.”

“Bring it down.” Obi Wan said waving Cody off distractedly. He heard as Cody ran off and give the command. He tried to focus on her again, to prepare for what she may be planning. The sound of the cannon seemed to ring especially loud in his ears and this time, time seemed to slow to a near stop.

Obi Wan gasped as fear and anger gripped him so strongly that it brought him to his knees.

It wasn’t his.

Shaking, he looked out of the window and watched in horror as her fighter appeared, as if out of nowhere, between the cannon and the transport. He reached out with the Force to the cruiser and felt it, there was life on that transport. “No.” He choked out in despair as the bolt hit her ship in the wing and she spiraled to the ground, disappearing in a cloud of smoke and dust. What have I done?

“Are you all right, General?” Commander Cody asked with concern, returning to Obi Wan’s side and pulling him to his feet.

Obi Wan didn’t trust his voice to be steady, so he simply nodded and looked back to where she had crashed.

Cody hesitated, but shook off his brief confusion and gave his report. “The transport got away Sir, but I believe the ship we did take out belonged to Lady Y/L/N!” He said with pride.

“Good work, Commander.” Obi Wan said after a few moments. He hoped that Cody couldn’t hear the trepidation he felt in his voice. “We will need to search the wreckage; she may have survived.”

“Right away, Sir!” Cody said with a salute before gathering a small team.

It didn’t take them long to make their way the remains of her ship. As they drew closer Obi Wan motioned for the clones to stand back. He had a moment of relief as he felt her presence again; however, it was short lived as a darker energy than he had ever felt consumed him.

He managed to grab his lightsaber just in time as the hatch opened and Y/N flew out and attacked him with even more ferocity than their first encounter. Obi Wan could only defend as her lightsaber battered against his own. Every time their sabers connected it felt as if a shock was sent through his entire body. As she continued to push him backwards, he felt a strange tightness in his chest and he realized what was happening.

It isn’t just anger, this is hate.

The thought made him pause just long enough for her to gain the full advantage. She managed to knock his feet out from under him while disarming him at the same time. He attempted to roll and Force push her away, but she had countered him with her own strong push.

As they each struggled to gain the upper hand, the moment slipped away and it felt as if they were pushed away from time itself. They had somehow each gained full clarity into the others mind and were stunned as memories that were not their own flooded them.

A five year old child stood before the Council with her nervous parents standing behind her. “Too old to train, she is.” Yoda stated with a finality that seemed to crush the small family.

~

She had no memory after the bully punched her brother who was defending their little sister. When she was aware again, she was being pulled away as the older kid gasped for air. She had only wanted to protect her family.

~

The child was seven now and she was alone in a small room packing her few belongings. The sounds of her parents arguing could be heard through the walls. She had to leave. Dangerous is what they called her.

She closed the sack as she crossed to her window, but the sight of the holo on her makeshift desk stopped her. She picked it up gently and watched as the parents and three siblings laughed as if they had nothing to fear. Tears formed in her eyes as she stuffed it in her sack and disappeared out the window.

~

She was alone, afraid and starving. She backed into a corner as a mysterious man approached her with his hand raised cautiously. “Don’t be afraid, young one. I can help you to control it.” She glanced at his extended hand suspiciously, but her stomach rumbled with pain and she knew she had no choice but to take the chance.

~

They were in The Universal. A younger Winston shook her hand with a warm smile and she immediately felt at peace. “This is the closest I have to a home Y/N.” Her new master explained. “It may not be the most honest living, but you can live.”

~

The girl was thirteen, and her master was dying. The tattooed Zabrak stood over him with a menacing smile.

“Run Y/N. Go, NOW.” Her Master cried out with his last breath. She was stunned and watched as the Zabrak landed the killing blow and turned toward her. She switched on her new lightsaber but it was unsteady in her hands. She took one last look at her Master and, with tears in her eyes, followed his final advice.

She ran.

~

She had come a long way since her master died. Her skills had improved and she was fully confident in her abilities. Now twenty-four, she was lounging with her eyes closed as Winston was reading his data pad. “Did you hear? A Jedi has killed a Sith.”

“Oh?” she said with mild disinterest.

He nodded as he continued reading. “Yes, apparently an apprentice… Obi Wan Kenobi killed a Zabrak called Darth Maul.”

She opened her eyes, but it was the only indication that the news had any effect on her. “Hm, I will have to thank this Jedi someday.”

~

She pushed her family toward the transport, but her father turned on her. “They have shot down every single ship that has tried to escape. What makes you think this one will make it?”

“There’s a Jedi in that control room. He will feel your lives, he won’t bring it down.” She said with certainty.

“What makes you so sure?” He demanded.

“I’ve met him. I trust him.” She said, surprising even herself.

Her father finally met her eyes and placed a gentle hand on her shoulder. “Y/N, I’m so so…”

“Not now, you need to go.” She said, interrupting him and shoving him on board.

They were both trembling as the memories faded, but Y/N still had a firm grip on her lightsaber. “What have you done?” She finally choked out with tears shining in her eyes.

Obi Wan closed his own eyes and tried to center himself, but all he could find was confusion and fear. As he began to wallow in his despair, he heard Y/N scream in pain. He opened his eyes to see her crouching on the ground holding her bleeding arm. The clones had managed to shoot her, and her lightsaber lay deactivated a few feet away.

“Lady Y/L/N, you are under arrest for crimes against the Galactic Senate.” Commander Cody stated without emotion as he stood over her with his blaster pointed at her head.

Y/N regarded him with pure malice. “You may have won this battle clone, but you just assured this war for the Separatists.” She said with conviction.

Obi Wan stood shakily and stepped between Cody’s blaster and Y/N. “Y/N please, do not fight this.” He pleaded, before adding quietly. “We can help you.”

“No! I will never submit to someone who would kill innocents!” She spat, focusing her fierce gaze on Obi Wan.

“Your lies will not work on us, Separatist Scum!” Cody yelled as he moved around Obi Wan and hit her with the stock of his blaster.

“Enough!” Obi Wan commanded as he pulled Cody away. He glanced at Y/N who now had blood trickling down her face, but wore a satisfied grin as she watched their interaction. He turned back to Cody with more ferocity than he intended. “She has had enough, we will take her to the council.”

“As you wish, General.” Cody said with clear frustration. He shook out of Obi Wan’s grip and moved forward, pulling her roughly to her feet. She swayed with the abrupt motion, the events of the last few moments finally catching up to her.

“Treat her gently, Cody.” Obi Wan warned. “She may be a prisoner, but she is a prisoner of the Republic. She will have care and will not be harmed, any further, in any way.”

Cody’s grip tightened on her arm, but he responded with respect. “Of course, General Kenobi.”

He watched with empathy as Cody tugged her away toward their base. When they finally disappeared, he turned toward her destroyed ship and moved pointedly toward the cockpit. He wasn’t sure how but he knew he would find it in the rubble, the sack the young child had packed. After a few moments of digging, he finally pulled it out and opened it gingerly.

The contents had changed. It was now mostly filled with the golden coins used as currency at The Universal, but the holo he had seen in the vision was still there. He plucked it out and activated it. It was the same family he had seen in her memories, so happy and full of hope for the future. Tears suddenly filled his eyes as he turned off the holo and placed it back in the sack.

He found his way back to their base in a slight daze and contacted Anakin immediately. “There’s been a development. We’ve captured Lady Y/L/N and I will be escorting her to meet with the Council. Will you be okay?”

“Of course, Master.” Anakin replied.

“Yeah, I’ll protect him Master!” Ahsoka said cheerfully.

“That’s enough out of you, Snips.” Anakin scolded.

Obi Wan smiled despite himself and ended the communication.

As he moved toward the ship that would transport them to Coruscant, he reflected on what had happened. They had somehow formed a bond, stronger than anything he had ever felt before. The thought warmed his heart and simultaneously gave him a strong sense of dread.

What have I done?