#its 37 hours a week roughly... and like... huh...

[doctorwormcore]

so like... i go back to work tomorrow... and then... im full time for at LEAST two months???? wow.... seven hour days...half hour commute each way...but...like...?!?!?!? im in training too...idk man its...its really good so far??? I get to work in aircon, in an area that directly meets art and disability work......i like it so far...in between this, being a cat mum, and now about to get my license fINALLY...everything is a bit overwhelming atm

[leerongrong]

[1:59] the need to throw your phone across the room grows every second best friend!jaemin doesn’t reply to your messages, the last message you sent was 30 minutes ago and he still hasn’t replied. you figure his phone’s notification must be broken from the amount of date outfit photos you sent, now you're starting to regret trusting his gut to choose the outfit picnic date!jisung would like the most.

the day has been perfect, blue clouds and warm weather to accommodate the date jisung asked you out on just a week ago. said boy had planned the day out for weeks, only gathering enough courage to ask you the week prior. he had shyly reminded you again of your date yesterday, to bring some dessert and to meet him at the river. you’d asked him whether you needed to dress nicely or not and his answer was, “you always look pretty no matter what you wear.” with a heavy blush on his cheeks that made you blush too.

you had finished your hair and makeup roughly an hour ago and you’ve planned on either wearing a dress or a skirt, both options seemed uncomfortable as you'll be sitting down the whole time and you'll dread washing the grass stains but you still feel the need to impress your date.

“finally!” jaemin’s specially saved ringtone played on your phone, the melody very catchy and you'd found out it was one of his songs, you pressed the accept button immediately. “nana, i’m gonna be late!”

“i know, i know,” he gushes, "i just finished lecturing jisung- he wanted to wear a hoodie on your date! can you believe it?”

“na jaemin, i will literally spread your netflix password if you don't pick from one of the photos right now.”

“wear the skirt. jisung likes skirts.”

the adrenaline’s still running high in your system the moment you arrive. the river is tranquil with not many people there, just a few sitting on benches and some cycling near the park. the river is flowing smoothly as it should, with countless trees planted around it in purpose of giving shade from the sunlight and under one of them, you spot jisung.

the boy’s laid out on an open mat and while he is facing the other way, you can clearly see him twiddling with his fingers and you giggle, glad that you’re not the only one nervous for this date. you walk slowly onto the grass, hands on your skirt so that it doesn’t go flying when the wind blows. you see a picnic basket in front of jisung, multiple types of food surrounding him and a stereo speaker on his lap.

“hi.”  jisung’s head snaps up at the moment your voice hits his ears, getting up quickly on his feet to greet you with his own smile. “hey.”

you’re changing positions ever so often the moment you plop down while music plays for the both of you, the melody sweet and gentle as you try to eat in peace, conversation and banter flowing like the river in your view. jisung’s hands are twitching and you wonder if he’s uncomfortable with your endless moving. “do you want to use my hoodie?”

“what?”

“you look uncomfortable in you skirt.” his cheeks are pink and he avoids eye contact while rummaging his backpack, hands popping back into view along with a gray hoodie. “i thought it’d be helpful.”

“thank you, sung.” your plates are placed on the ground while you reach out to take his hoodie, both of your hands brushing for a moment and you blush at the contact. you’re quick to hide your face as you pretend to busy yourself with putting his hoodie on your lap while he’s quick to avert his gaze to the laptop in his backpack.

multiple people pass along the both of you while you eat dessert, kids jogging around and playing soccer while you two watch the clouds move along, sometimes pointing out their shape and what they reminded you of, sometimes even laughing at the shapes jisung comes up with.

“you want to watch a movie?”

the two of you sit side by side, a comfortable distance in between while jisung sets up his laptop and opens netflix to watch a movie. while the movie’s duration shortens, so does the distance between you and jisung, the two of you shoulder to shoulder when the movie hits halfway and it takes everything in you to rest your head on his shoulder, heart beating faster while you wait for his reaction.

jisung is quiet for some time, his body going stiff after you laid your head down. the boy trying to take deep breaths as discreetly as possible. ‘she smells like strawberries and vanilla.’ jisung takes one deep breath, almost coughing when he hears you take one too. ‘come on, jisung. be a man, be a man.’

your heart jumps out of your chest when you feel fingers intertwine with yours. you'd imagine what holding his hand would be like before, only now experiencing how big his hands are and how they're slightly calloused and you feel shy to think about how his slim fingers fit perfectly intertwined between yours, the smooth texture of his palm underneath yours.

the rest of the date goes smoothly, both of you silent as he slowly walks you to the front door of your house. the night air is fresh and cold, slightly nipping at your skin under jisung’s hoodie. he's looking down at his feet the moment you reach the door, your hands ready to push it open and go inside to scream into your pillow. “i had a great time.”

“i- yeah- me too. i had a great time too.” his smile is flustered, cheeks pushed up as he smiles bigger at you. you see him slowly raise his hand to wave as he turns to walk back home. “good night.”

you're bitting the inside of your cheek, eyes trailing after his figure and you cup your hands to your mouth to scream out. "jisung, wait!"

your feet have never moved this fast in your life, you scramble down the side walk to meet him halfway, stopping yourself before you crash into him. under the streetlamp, you decide jisung looks more ethereal anyone else ever would, the thought of seeing him again soon filling your tummy with butterflies. you raise yourself on tiptoes, planting a kiss onto his cheek and making a mad dash back to your front door. you push the door open and wave at him, giggling when you see his tomato like red face. "let's do this again soon, yeah? walk back safe, good night sungie."

the door clicks shut as you slide down the wooden surface, heart beating so fast you press your palm on it, hoping to calm it down. your cheeks hurt from smiling so wide and you're not sure how long you’ve stayed in that position until multiple dings from your phone snaps you out.

[20:01] nana🐰

how was your date?

[20:16]  nana🐰

jisung just came in looking like a tomato

[20:17] nana🐰

why does he look like this???

[20:17] nana🐰

hellooo????

[20:18] nana🐰

oohhh you kissed him! and asked for another date!!

[20:18] nana🐰

he looks like a love struck fool

[20:19] nana🐰

p.s jisung's going around like an idiot looking for his hoodie. its with you right?

[20:20] nana🐰

p.s.s jisung just realized its with you & says you can keep his hoodie. he said, i quote, “hyung it looked better on her than it ever did on me.”

[20:22] nana🐰

heheh jisung says your hair smells like strawberries and he likes it

[20:25] sungiiiee <3

please don’t read hyung’s messages!

[20:26] sungiiiee <3

i had a really good time...

[20:36] sungiiiee <3

i'll call you tomorrow, goodnight♡

[20:37] hyuck 🤡

he’s smiling so hard at his phone i’m scared his face’ll fall off.

[20:37] hyuck 🤡

it took him a whole ten minutes just to send a heart. love sick idiot.

[20:34] nana🐰

i hope he makes you happy as much as you do him. it makes me happy seeing him like this. tell me about the date tomorrow, now get some rest okay? good night.

[20:37] to: sungiiie <3

too late for that sksksk. your hoodie looks good on me huh?😳 good night sungie♡

[20:38] to: nana🐰

dont worry nana, he made me smile like no one ever did... good night.

[caroline18mars]

A Man On Fire - Chapter 37

Where was she? Jared’s eyes scanned the room, storming inside there had been no more answer after his last e-mail, and he was starting to worry that she’d been too upset to send a coherent answer after everything she read online about him. Following the murmur of a TV coming from the bedroom, he opened the door, there she was looking at the ceiling, the phone balancing on her forehead made him snigger, she was so deliciously awkward and her behavior was so quirky it often made him giggle, that was what most women these days lacked, a sense of humour. “Hey” he softly said as he threw his phone and wallet on the floor and crawled on the bed over to her, kissing those luscious lips so hard it made the phone slide off her forehead, her sad eyes took his breath away, “oh hey, I didn’t hear you come in” she sighed, twirling a strand of his long hair around her finger. “You ok?” he whispered unable to stop kissing her lips, he’d hungered for her kisses all afternoon, “yeah, how was your afternoon?” she kissed the tip of his nose, “fine, but I missed you” his hands caressed her stomach “are you sure you’re ok, you look a little sad”. Her dark brown eyes locked with his, yep definitely sad “I'm alright, I missed you too” she breathed, to his surprise she started unbuttoning his pants, slowly sliding down the zipper, “Harper..babe” he whispered, she'd never went down on him before, not that he was complaining, oh no, was this about..?. “Shut up, Jay..I'm not just doing this for you, I just happen to love giving head” she freed his lightly aroused dick and licked her lips looking up at him “let's see just how 'Jaylicious' you really are” her hand found an ever so slow rhythm for a few seconds until her tongue started joining in, licking his growing length until it was fully erect in all its' massive glory. “Yum” her eyes glazed over as he saw the tip of his dick dissappear between her lips, rolling her tongue over it before she hungrily started sucking, inch for inch he dissapeared in her mouth, “oooowww” he growled in pleasure when he felt her push down until it hit the back of her throat. She looked an absolute picture, taking her time to give him the best head he had gotten in years, closing her eyes in bliss, this was definitely a keeper, ohhh, “yeahhhh” he groaned as she forced herself deeper down over him. Even her gagging was deliciously sexy when he helped her a little pushing deeper inside so his dick could slip past that final frontier, “relax..that's it..good girl” he heard himself say when she relaxed her throat but his mind was a boiling mess. She felt like in a trance, it was painful and wonderful at the same time, this was what she needed after this horrible afternoon, it actually relaxed her and brought her in a different headspace, when her mind couldn't take it anymore, she just went into submission and gave him control over her body and mind. It felt like she was trying to suck him dry, that's how ferocious her attack was on him, he grabbed her hair roughly and pushed her down one last time, he didn't care if she was about to choke “fuuuckkk, yeahhhh” he barked and shot his load deep inside her mouth.

Harper gasped for air as she let her back connect with the mattress while he zipped up again before he slid down next to her and kissed the bare spot of skin on her stomach where her T-shirt had crept up. “Is that what reading fanfics and some nasty gossip site does to you? If so then I'm totally down with it” his hot breath tickled on her skin, “so not funny, Leto, reading about your random girls having imaginary and real bdsm sessions with you is not exactly eroticizing, trust me”. Don't grump, Coco, come on, no can't help it, gone was the mindnumbing bubble of submission, hello again to your reality and the worries that came with it, “whoa, don't call them my girls, because they're not, I told you, they're just a whole lot of overactive imaginations and gossip site trash” he lifted his head with a frown that matched the scribble of worry on hers, she didn't believe him. He stretched so he was next to her “look at me”, he had to repeat his question because she was so lost in her thoughts again “Harper Coco, will you look at me?” he said a little sterner, mentioning her full first name did the trick. “It's just gossip, those things that are being said about me..it all happened a looong time ago, I was different, things were different, I was a lot more promiscuous back then, there was the first success, booze, dope, and a whole lot of groupies, I'll admit that much and I guess you could say that Shannon still hasn't escaped that era but I have”. Jared pushed himself up on one elbow “I'm not the same Jared anymore, they're not my girls, they never were..but YOU..you are, you're definitely my girl and I wouldn't want it any other way..I love you, I love only you”. She let her indexfinger trace down his nose “how do I know that? I mean, we've only been together for a few weeks and..this tour is littered with beautiful girls in the frontstage every night, I've seen how far they're willing to go..”. He couldn't stand to hear any more “stop it, Harper! Just stop right there! So basically what you're trying to say is that you're insecure about me and the fans? Ok, well, what about me? Because I'm just as insecure as you are, I see all the men on this tour, on the street, in coffeeshops, museums and they're all staring at you, drooling over you, like they want to have their wicked way with you right there on the spot, how do you think I feel? I'm just as insecure as you are” he breathed. “You? Insecure? Mr. Rockstar? I find that very hard to believe” she plucked a little kiss from his lips “I don't know what gave you that idea though, it's not like I've done anything with all that admiration as you call it, unlike you”. It was said with a smile but he felt the little sting behind it, he just didn't get the time to react properly because there was a knock on the door and she got up, “Hey Harper, is my brother..? oh there he is!” Shannon just came walking in “we're about to leave for the venue, you coming?”. Jared looked at Harper who was already grabbing her things, “I am, but you..you're staying here” he locked eyes with her, “what? But I need to..the lights..” she frowned, “you've nearly crashed, you're hurting so I'm listening to what the doctor said..you are going to rest”. Don't leave me here, come on, I don't want to be alone with my thoughts right now “no, let me come with you at least..” she started protesting. “Sorry babe, but I know you, the minute you'll arrive at the venue, you'll start working, and that's the last thing I want, no, you're staying right here and you're gonna rest up, early tomorrow morning we'll be leaving for Italy and I know you want to be fit and have a clear head about that” he kissed the top of her head and let his hand caress her hair, case closed, fuck this “I'll try and keep the meet and greet short, ok? I'll be back before you know it, can't wait”.

It was the early hours of morning when she felt the mattress dip and her eyes fluttered open, “hey babe..you awake?” the smell of alcohol in his kiss that landed on her cheek was nearly sickening “I am now” she grumbled as she pulled the cover over her a little higher, she so wasn't in the mood for this. “You mad?” he giggled as he seductively tried to bite her earlobe, “no, I'm not angry, I'm extatic to be woken up in the middle of the night by my drunk lover, definitely extatic yeah” she hissed venomously. “Oh, I like it when you're being feisty” he giggled and let his hand venture down to her butt, “you touch that butt, you lose that hand” she warned him “I'm not kidding, Jared, go to sleep”. Uh-oh she wasn't kidding..damn! 'slap' his hand still landed on her butt, she hissed in shock while he giggled and playfully rolled away from her waiting for her to turn around and scold him or laugh, didn't matter, but what he was expecting didn't come, she just huffed, buried herself in the duvet and ignored him. “Harper? Babe?” he ticked the duvet, no reaction anymore, he ticked again like a puppy that wanted to play, he was definitely in trouble..”I'll go to sleep then!..” again no reaction, oh god the room was spinning “you sure you don't want some good loving?” he yawned, I'm just gonna close my eyes for a second, maybe then the room will stand still again “you absolutely sure?” oooohhhh yes definitely better, ooohhh his arms were so heavy “ok then..talk..to you..in..morning..wuvv ya” and with that darkness surrounded him. She rolled her eyes when she heard his heavy breathing turn into loud snoring, dumbass, bleggghhh, so not in the mood for this..ok this snoring was getting out of control by the second, grumbling she got up, dragging the entire duvet with her, don't give a fuck, the alcohol will keep him warm and stomped out of the room, slamming the door behind her.

His phone bleeping pulled him out of his alcohol induced coma, as far as he was able to see nothing important, he put the phone back down and looked at the empty spot next to him in bed, huh? Where was she? He pushed the covers away and took a few seconds to get back to his senses sitting on the edge of the bed, it was the loud bang followed by a heartfelt curse that had him venture out the bedroom and into the opulent living room. “What are you doing?” he walked up to his lover jumping from one foot to the other, “what does it look like I'm doing?” she growled as she pointed at the culprit that was her suitcase that had decided to tumble off the chaise longue and which was now turning her little toe black and blue. Instead of reacting verbally he just crouched down, took her foot and kissed her toes “there, better?” his beautiful baby blues looked up at her, Harper nodded, her cheeks flushed she looked so nervous. “Come here” he whispered as he got up and put his arms around her “what's wrong?” he whispered as he nuzzled her hair, her body felt tense and was trembling at the same time, “nothing..I just need to pack my bags, we're leaving in an hour” she lied as she let go of him trying to step out of his embrace. “I'm not going anywhere until you tell me what's troubling you, did I misbehave? I really didn't plan on coming back a drunk mess” he folded his arms around her waist and let them rest on the curve of her butt. Harper shook a firm 'no' and then hung her head “I'm nervous because we're travelling today and that stupid suitcase fell on my toe and just look at that mess” she broke away from him and kneeled down again to throw all of her stuff back into the suitcase. He kneeled down next to her and stilled her trembling hands “are you sure it's just the travelling? Because I think it's the destination, it's going back to Italy that's freaking you out, isn't it?”. How could she possibly think she could hide this from him? “yeah” she whispered all hoarse refusing to look at him, “you're going home, babe..you've got a chance to make things right with your family”. His words made her shudder “I know, but what if..”, he put his thumb against her plump lips to silence her “no, Harper, no 'what if's', you're gonna go there with an open mind, you'll talk things through..” his hand drifted over to her long hair, caressing it ever so gently. “Excuse me” she suddenly jumped up and ran off to the bathroom, all colour drained from her face, “babe..you ok?” he slowly knocked on the bathroomdoor but nothing except from a gagging noise followed by flushing water. She walked back out with her hand over her mouth and gazing at her feet, it simply broke his heart to see her this upset, this nervous, “I'll be right there with you, we'll do this together” once again he put his arms around her and she clung to him this time. I want to believe it, I need to believe it..her cheek rested against his chest and listening to the soft thumping of his wonderful, warm heart she closed her eyes, it was gonna be ok as long as she had this beautiful, strong, wonderful man by her side, of course it would be ok, believe it..

[bebecue]

Anonymous said: “37!!!! with wonho!!!! hehe thanku♡♡♡”

37. “I didn’t even know you could blush. It’s nice.”

You check the time on your watch. It reads 5:37 pm. You have been at the gym for over an hour, and have been on the treadmill for over fifty minutes.You’re about to run out of steam, and you want to give up, but the guy you have been lowkey crushing on hasn’t arrived for his daily gym session yet, and you had been hoping to see him today. 

From what you gathered from the trainers, staff and other gym-goers, his name was Wonho. He was friendly with everyone, and people genuinely liked him. He always gave the staff at the gym cheerful greetings, followed with the brightest smile you could imagine. He was polite to the other gym-goers, always waiting his turn at the machines he wanted to use, and wiping down equipment he had been using. You didn’t want to be shallow, but one of the things that attracted your attention to him was his Adonis-like body. You always found yourself staring a little too long whenever he lifted dumbbells. You couldn’t help it. The way his muscles tensed and bulged fascinated you, and the first time you saw him lifting weights, you almost tripped on the treadmill. One other thing that intrigued you about him was that every few months, he’d show up with his hair dyed some outrageous color. One time, he showed up with bleached silver hair, the ends dip-dyed a powder blue. A few weeks after that, it was bleached blonde. And then a couple of months later, it was dyed jet black. When you saw him yesterday, it was a deep purple, his hair color for the past four weeks. The speed at which he changed his hair color gave you figurative whiplash. 

You had only had two previous encounters with  Wonho. The first was when he struggled to turn on the water fountain in order to fill up his bottle. You were too eager to help him out, and you twisted the knob too quickly and too roughly. The water shot out of the fountain in a wide arch, and drenched you, soaking your shirt. Wonho was kind enough to let you use his unused towel, and he had told you to keep it, insisting that he had another one in his bag. He had left you at the fountain, somewhat dazed and giddy, clutching his towel to your chest. The second encounter involved him asking you for the time. You almost choked on your speech, and it was a struggle to get the words “four forty-two” out of your mouth.

You are about to give up and call it a day, slowing the pace on your treadmill as you start to cool down. You look up from the keypad, and you see a spot of bright red in your vision. You blink, thinking that the red spot is a remnant of the bright red lights from the keypad, but you see a face and a body underneath the mop of red hair. You almost fall off the treadmill. It’s Wonho, and his hair is brighter than a red traffic light.

He greets a trainer, and gets on one of the cross-trainers on the other side of the room. You finish your cool down, and you decide to go closer to where Wonho is. You see that opposite the set of cross-trainers is a couple of weight benches. You also see that one is directly in front of the machine that Wonho is using, and you head over to it, quickly making a decision to do some bench presses. You start to set it up, and you look over to Wonho, who gives you a polite nod and a small smile while he continues his cardio workout. You put two five kilogram weights on either side of the bar, but you decide that it isn’t enough. So you increase the weight, adding two fifteen kilogram weights on either side. This’ll impress him, you think to yourself. You sneak a peek at Wonho, and he is giving you a strange look that you can’t quite read. You then lie down on the bench, and attempt to do your first press. The bar is heavy, but you manage to bring it down to just above your chest. You try and lift it up again, and with a surge of panic, you realize that it is too heavy. You struggle, exhaling roughly, and your arms give way, the bar almost crushing your chest.

“Shit!” you say, or try to, at least. What comes out of your mouth instead is a garbled yell and some spit. 

You’re about to black out completely, when suddenly, the weight is lifted off from you, and you’re able to use your lungs again. 

You hear your savior grunt, and the clang of the bar as it’s placed back onto its stand. You groan as you sit up from the bench and attempt to thank the kind stranger. Wonho looks at you from behind the bench, his hands still hanging loosely from the bar. 

He frowns at you. “You should really have a spotter when you’re doing bench presses,” he says, chastising you.

You look down, extremely embarrassed. “Yeah,” you agree. “I thought I could do it myself, but that was obviously a dumb idea.”

Wonho gives you a small smile. “If you want, you could always ask me. I wouldn’t mind spotting for someone as cute as you.” He adds a wink, and you swear you feel yourself dissociate from your body.

“I, uh, yeah, that would be great,” you manage to splutter.

Wonho laughs, his smile reaching all the way up to his eyes. “I didn’t even know you could blush like that. It’s nice.”

You shift your eyes quickly to the top of his head. “Is my face as red as your hair?”

He laughs again, and his fingers reach up to his bangs, gingerly stroking the strands. “That bright, huh?”

[junker-town]

6 winners from Week 12 of the NFL season

Photo by Timothy T Ludwig/Getty Images

The Bills old man/young man tailback combo might be the balancing act they need for the playoffs.

Week 12 didn’t offer much in terms of playoff-caliber matchups. It did, however, offer plenty of instances of good teams playing poorly and bad teams leveling up.

The Seahawks gave the Eagles roughly 20 different chances to keep pace in Philadelphia before their eventual win. The Saints let the Panthers stick around thanks to dumb mistakes and stupid penalties before kicking a game-winning field goal as time expired. The Patriots’ offense looked every bit as non-threatening in a win over the Cowboys as it did last week against the Eagles.

Meanwhile, Washington and the Bengals, two teams that had one win between them, each held halftime leads. Washington even went on to win!

Sunday’s winners, of course, weren’t limited to teams that slumped to uninspiring wins or beat a Matthew Stafford-less Lions team. Here are the six players and teams who got their share of triumph in Week 12.

It wasn’t ...

Not considered: the Raiders, whose playoff hopes have been upended by the ... Jets?

Wait, that can’t be right.

No, huh, here it is. Jets 34, Raiders 3. Oakland opened the game with a field goal and then watched the Jets cascade over them like lava sliding down a mountainside. Things got so bad that the Raiders threw human white flag Mike Glennon into the lineup with more than 16 minutes left in the game. Glennon, true to form, fumbled on each of his first two series.

Derek Carr, who’d come into the week as a low-key MVP candidate, finished with just 127 passing yards and a pick-six, netting -3 points for Oakland. Glennon’s five drives gained a grand total of 32 yards. Everything was a mess for the Raiders.

On the other hand, Sunday’s beating was a cathartic moment for long-suffering Jets fans. Sam Darnold powered up with 315 passing yards and two touchdowns. Prized offseason acquisition Le’Veon Bell averaged 6.4 yards every time he heard his number called. A defense that ranked 24th in the league in points allowed stifled a team with a winning record to a long field goal.

So, good day if you’re a Jets fan. A season-changing, optimism-crushing one if you’re pulling for the Raiders.

Now on to ...

Week 12’s actual winners

6. Tyler Boyd, Cincinnati’s silver lining

Boyd was a 1,000-yard receiver in 14 games in 2018, but his impact with a winless Bengals team had been muted this fall. He’d had just 192 receiving yards in his last five games, including a one-catch, zero-yard performance in a loss to the Raiders that forced him to express his displeasure with Cincinnati’s toothless offense to the press.

First-year head coach Zac Taylor and rookie quarterback Ryan Finley were listening. On Sunday, they made it a priority to get Boyd opportunities early in the game. He responded with a pair of plays that almost single-handedly willed the Bengals to a touchdown.

First he showed off some Spider-Man hands (well, hand) on a 47-yard gain:

OH BOYD! Tyler Boyd with the unreal one-handed grab! #PITvsCIN @boutdat_23 : CBS : NFL app // Yahoo Sports app Watch free on mobile: https://t.co/YLI9jW8U5W pic.twitter.com/lfEakj1lzr

— NFL (@NFL) November 24, 2019

Then he finished the drive one play later for Cincinnati’s only touchdown of the afternoon.

Spike that #BigLevels | #SeizeTheDEY pic.twitter.com/UL23JlYdaY

— Cincinnati Bengals (@Bengals) November 24, 2019

The Bengals still lost to the Steelers, 16-10, but Boyd led all receivers with five catches for 101 yards. The fourth-year pro showed he can be the team’s top wide receiver as Cincinnati hurtles toward an A.J. Green-less future and a complete rebuild. Unfortunately, that likely means spending the next four seasons in southwest Ohio, which might not be especially ... prosperous from a win/loss standpoint.

5. Dwayne Haskins, winning NFL quarterback

It wasn’t pretty, but Haskins quarterbacked Washington to a win. With the roster currently constructed as owner Dan Snyder’s tribute to the films of David Lynch, that’s an accomplishment.

The rookie only completed 13 of his 29 attempts and failed to throw a touchdown pass for the second time in his three NFL starts. He came up big when his team needed him the most, however. He pushed Washington 33 yards in the game’s final minute to set up Dustin Hopkins’ game-winning field goal. His 17-yard completion to fellow first-year player Terry McLaurin on third-and-5 helped give fans at FedEx Field a reason to go home rather than grit their way through overtime.

Haskins, in his most relatable moment of the afternoon, was possibly too eager to get the hell off the field. Case Keenum had to take over kneeldown duties at the end of the game because the rookie was too busy taking selfies with some of the intrepid few who’d shelled out upwards of $6 to purchase tickets.

Dwayne Haskins takes a selfie with fans while Case Keenum has to do the victory formation pic.twitter.com/Y76AL2cquF

— CJ Fogler (@cjzer0) November 24, 2019

Haskins would like nothing more than to ignore the on-field action at a Washington game in favor of having fun with people he likes. Same, Dwayne.

Same.

4. Tevita Tuli’aki’ono Tuipulotu Mosese Va’hae Fehoko Faletau Vea, touchdown machine

Vita Vea, possessor of the amazing name copied-and-pasted above (I wouldn’t dare try to type it from memory) had never scored an NFL touchdown before Sunday. This made sense, since he’s a 347-pound defensive tackle who’d played only three offensive snaps in his career before Week 12.

As such, the Falcons wouldn’t expect him to be a red zone threat. That’s exactly what Tampa Bay head coach Bruce Arians was hoping.

THIS IS NOT A DRILL VITA VEA HAS HAULED IN HIS FIRST CAREER TOUCHDOWN pic.twitter.com/UXlButlO9H

— Tampa Bay Buccaneers (@Buccaneers) November 24, 2019

Vea, lined up at fullback, slipped past the line scrimmage untouched and caught an easy lob from Jameis Winston to send his team into the locker room with a 19-10 advantage. It was also the heaviest touchdown in league history.

This goal-line wizardry helped offset what had threatened to be another awful Winston outing. The mercurial quarterback threw interceptions in two of his first three drives. With the burly lineman getting into the mix, Winston went on to finish his day with three touchdowns, 313 passing yards, and a stellar 11.2 yards per pass. Of course, it wasn’t just Vea’s single yard of offense that did the trick. Chris Godwin’s seven catches for 184 yards and two touchdowns was probably just as valuable in a 35-22 win that kept the Bucs’ playoff hopes alive for another week.

There's a reason they don't call him Chris Regularguywin.

— Taylor Jenkins (@TJenkinsTampa) November 24, 2019

3. Dennis Kelly, who gave us our second O-lineman beer chugging celebration in as many weeks

Last Sunday, Quenton Nelson showed the world his keg stand skills after scoring a touchdown that ultimately was called back. In Week 12, it was Kelly who taught viewers proper shotgunning technique after the tackle found the end zone for the Titans.

Open up the cooler for the boys! #JAXvsTEN#BudLightCelly | @budlight pic.twitter.com/5DmJtbFq0s

— Tennessee Titans (@Titans) November 24, 2019

Between Vea and Kelly, NFL fans were gifted 668 pounds of touchdown catches over the course of two plays. If the league keeps this up, we may have to co-opt the Piesman Trophy for the pros.

2. The Bosa brothers, who are apparently the key to beating Aaron Rodgers

The 2019 Packers vs. teams with a Bosa brother: 0-2

The 2019 Packers vs. everyone else: 8-1

Back in Week 9, Joey Bosa helped make Rodgers’ life hell with 1.5 of the Chargers’ three sacks that day. Los Angeles shot out for a surprising 26-11 win on the West Coast that reduced the Green Bay offense into a sputtering Bengals cosplay. In Week 12, Nick Bosa had one sack as the San Francisco defense got to Rodgers five times in a surprising 37-8 reckoning a few hours north of LA.

Bosa was part of a 49ers pass rush that kept Rodgers dancing in the pocket all evening. San Francisco limited the two-time MVP’s damage with a consistent pass rush and a big dose of trust in its secondary. Rodgers never found a rhythm downfield because his wideouts failed to get behind the Niners’ blanketing coverage. Even the improvised scrambling plays on which the veteran has built his legend were limited to short gains rather than long bombs.

As a result, he played at a level that can only be accurately described by one made-up but entirely accurate word: Bortles-ian.

The Niners made Rodgers look like an overwhelmed rookie rather than a savvy veteran. The Packers QB finished with an average of 3.2 yards per attempt — the lowest number he’s ever had in his 169 regular season starts in Green Bay. Jimmy Garoppolo, on the other hand, finished his day with 12.7 yards per attempt and 18.1 yards per completion,

Everyone else in the playoff picture should be taking notes — and trying to figure out how to lure a Bosa to their lineup in the near future.

1. The Bills’ legend-rookie run game

The Bills’ most dangerous weapon may be a multifaceted running attack led by one of the greatest tailbacks of all time and a teammate 14 years younger than him. Devin Singletary, the pride of the Florida Atlantic University Fightin’ Kiffins, notched the first 100+ yard rushing day of his career against the Broncos, springing for 106 yards on 21 carries. While that was a big accomplishment, he was overshadowed by someone who did less on the field.

That’s because Frank Gore’s 15-carry, 65-yard performance was enough to move him ahead of Barry Sanders on the league’s all-time rushing list. The 36-year-old now ranks behind only Emmitt Smith and Walter Payton with 15,289 yards in the course of a 15-year career.

The moment @FrankGore passed @BarrySanders to move into third on the all-time rushing yards list. pic.twitter.com/avxZ7TQlMy

— NFL (@NFL) November 24, 2019

The pair was part of a unit that ran for 244 yards against a defense that ranked seventh in the league in rushing defense until Week 12. That opened up the Denver defense enough for Josh Allen to throw for 185 yards and two touchdowns in a game that was never really in question.

So how did Gore handle this accolade? With the grace and veteran presence he’s become known for in his decade-plus in the NFL:

As we were talking to Devin Singletary he was asked a lot of questions about playing with Frank Gore. When Gore heard the questions he stood up and said “ask him about his first 100-yard game, that’s a big accomplishment” #Bills @WKBW

— Matthew Bové (@Matt_Bove) November 24, 2019

And later by thanking every offensive lineman who’d ever blocked for him. Awesome. It’s no wonder NFL legends came together to congratulate him after Sunday’s big accomplishment.

Congratulations to an all-time great from these all-time greats.@FrankGore | #FootballisFamily pic.twitter.com/iFLoJg2n9n

— Buffalo Bills (@BuffaloBills) November 24, 2019

Buffalo is now 8-3 with games against the Cowboys, Ravens, Steelers, Patriots, and Jets remaining. This could be the first 10-win Bills team of the millennium. It will likely be Gore’s first trip to the postseason since 2013.

The Bills still have plenty of flaws, but with a dominant defense and chain-moving running game, they’ve got the look of an old-school playoff squad.