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#its actually killing me inside a little that the segment has not made it to youtube yet
simperius · 2 months
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My favorite thing about John Oliver trending on Twitter for last night's episode is that all of the haters are saying some variation of "He's trying to bribe a member of the Supreme Court he should go to prison for this 😠😒"
You nailed it bud, that's the heart of the bit. They spent thirty whole minutes making that exact point. It SHOULD be illegal, and YET-
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embedded4554 · 2 years
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That Embedded Product - Did You See It?
Shows. Screens. They sparkle at us and splendidly yell at us from practically every contraption we contact or see as we travel as the day progressed. The hyperactive super-sized shows on Times Square are an undeniable illustration of our century's fixation on besieging the faculties. We are to be sure a general media society with an unquenchable hunger!
We interface routinely with presentations, fastens, and contact screens without a second thought. They are an important and basic piece of practically every electronic gadget available today, from your phone to your vehicle, to the cockpit of the plane that whisks you away an extended get-away. The human maintains that the machine should follow through with something, and they should impart. What's more, some way or another, they do. "In any case, you inquire, "who can say for sure how to assemble this stuff?"
Just a moderately little cross-segment of our general public become individuals that are the minds and strength of the business that comprehends the "how" of making such an electronic item, a "gadget," work. Individuals that wrench out these electronic treats consider their industry the "Embedded Product" industry. An entertaining name? Indeed, think about this. Every one of these superb man-made wonders contains one, or many, chip. You don't see them, and accordingly you simply don't contemplate them! For instance, you most likely don't call your wireless a PC, yet inside that smooth gadget there is, well…, a PC - - a microchip. The microchip is accordingly 'embedded' inside the gadget. It is an offspring of the "Embedded Product" industry.
Truth be told, each kid in grade school today discovers that a PC is a "PC" whose mind is a "chip" which runs "software" on an "working framework. The human collaborates with it through a "GUI" (pronounced "Gooey") or Graphical User Interface. In any case, do they, or do you, besides, question what is happening behind that now-natural GUI, inside that charming ladybug PDA? As my three year old child used to say, "How's this thing work?" Does it contain a working framework or a chip or software? "Review says…YES!"
As a matter of fact, a variation of the "track down the secret Mickey" game can be played the entire day. I challenge you to take a couple of seconds and cause a rundown of the quantity of things that you remember to have a "covered up" chip inside. Might it be said that you are finished? You neglected to record your microwave, isn't that right? Unfortunately you likewise neglected to list your TV!
Embedded items, obviously, are all over. A captivating gathering of specialists and item directors all over the planet team up to plan, construct and market these high technology items that our general public requests, expanding on the shoulders of those that have preceded them. No longer do we track down gadgets with needles, measures and switches. The intelligence of the chip utilized in embedded items has killed generally these burdensome actual parts and have supplanted them, all things considered, with the recognizable electronic showcase. Rich embedded GUIs, for example, one could track down on an Apple iPhone or the dashboard of another Mercedes, warmly connect with us consistently, asking for us to contact them or, at any rate, to simply respect them.
In this way, the exceptionally next time that you end up flying down the roadway in your vehicle, paying attention to your "tunes," taking a gander at your dashboard graphical connection point, with all its virtual meters and needles, noting your cell and advising the children to turn down their DVD, kindly require a moment to ponder the way that your vehicle alone has a lot a greater number of microchips than does the Space Shuttle. I think you'll then, at that point, concur with me that there is a lot of work yet left for our kids to do!
For more information please visit : TinyML
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jadelotusflower · 3 years
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It’s Cold in that Fridge: The Case of Nakari Kelen
Since The Case of Mara Jade has been doing the rounds again, I’ve finally gone back to this post that has been sitting in my drafts for literally years. So let’s honour this absolute badass who deserved better:
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Once upon a time, the Star Wars universe was but six films (and a tv series) in the story of the Skywalker family. But beyond George Lucas’ story was an absolute boatload of books, comics, games, and other materials that made up the Expanded Universe. When Disney purchased Lucasfilm and the rights to the Star Wars saga, everything in this universe was decanonised and deemed “Legends” - some aspects of this universe were retained or re-purposed, others sit in Disney’s figurative vault and will likely never see the light of day (and seeing how the ST turned out, maybe that’s for the best).
But this transition between Legends canon and Disney canon was not so simple, because the nature of publishing meant that there were novels approved during the time of Legends canon that would be released in the time of Disney canon. In particular, there had been the planned trilogy “Empire and Rebellion”, set between A New Hope and The Empire Strikes Back, with each novel from the perspective of one of The Big Three.  
Razor’s Edge (Leia) and Honor Among Thieves (Han) were released prior to the Great Canon Split of 2014.  But while the Luke-centric novel had been planned, it was not due to be released until well after the Split. So Heir to the Jedi (so called as an homage to the Legends progenitor Heir to the Empire) became one of the first books of the Disney canon.
What does this background have to do with Nakari Kelen?  Perhaps nothing, but I do wonder how the writing process was affected by the shift from Legends to Disney - was the novel a relic of the old EU with any reference the LFL storygroup didn’t like excised during editing, or was it a trendsetter for the new EU, a Sign of Things to Come?  
The most salient point being, of course, that Nakari Kelen - like so many love interests before her - was not allowed to go along her merry way at the conclusion of the novel, but was shoved into the fridge.
If there was one constant of the Legends EU, it was that Luke Skywalker’s love interests couldn’t catch a break. Mara Jade naturally lasted the longest relationship-wise, with almost twenty years of marriage to Luke before some bright spark decided she had to go (as per the aforementioned case study). But before Mara there was Jem, Shira Brie, and Gaeriel Captison (who came close to escaping the curse), and in the Legacy of the Force series they brought back sole survivors Akanah and Callista, only to kill them off for good too (and rather brutally, if I may add).
So perhaps when Kevin Hearne began writing HttJ within the confines of the Legends continuity, he was merely sticking to the status quo, or perhaps once subsumed by Disney they needed to make sure Luke's slate was clean (so to speak).  And I can’t put all the blame on Hearne since I don’t know whether it was his idea, or LFL mandated - but regardless it was a poor decision.
The root cause of fridging, imo, is limited imagination.  How best to cause your male protagonist pain if not kill off someone they love, or at least have strong feelings for? The answer is of course, easily. But I’m getting ahead of myself.
The Luke Skywalker of HttJ is fresh from his victory in ANH, a lieutenant in the Rebellion: young, not dumb, and full of...
Nakari Kalen is an absolute Queen a civilian volunteer and crack-shot sniper who loans her ship Desert Jewel to the Alliance. Luke is immediately attracted to her, they bond over a mutual love of fast ships and leaving behind desert home planets, and engage in the inexpert flirting of two nineteen year olds while also risking their lives several times over.
I want to make it clear: I actually really like this book. It's a breezy read, almost serialised as The Early Adventures of Luke Skywalker, and is ofttimes genuinely funny. And credit where it’s due to Hearne, many of of the supporting roles in the novel are female. Other than Nakari, there's Soonta, the Rodian who gives Luke her uncle’s lightsaber, Sakhet the Kupohan spy, and the Givin cryptographer/math genius Drusil Bephorin. In a genre where male characters are often the default for these kind of roles, it was nice to see, but makes the regressive fridging of Nakari even more egregious.
Luke and Nakari make a good team fighting brain-sucking monsters and Imperials, but more importantly they have fun together - she encourages him to work on his Force skills, and he successfully moves objects with his mind for the first time (leading to Nakari adorably dub him "a little noddle scooter"). It's a very sweet, if brief, relationship, and a respite from the danger of the mission. They spend the night together (leaving the reader to decide exactly what happened behind closed doors), and share a kiss before splitting up to try and escape bounty hunters. No prizes for guessing what happens to Nakari immediately after she received the Skywalker Kiss of Death.
I assume there were two motivating factors for why Hearne and/or LFL couldn't let Nakari live:
1. If she survived, fans would wonder why she doesn't appear in ESB/subsequent material.
I recall this bandied about on forums back at the time of the book's release, and to that I say - so what? Fans are always going to wonder, and try to paper over the gaps in canon, to make up their own headcanons to explain any any perceived inconsistencies. It's certainly no reason to kill someone off.
It is in fact possible for two young people to have a romance that just fizzles, or doesn’t work out for whatever reason - it should not require great maneuvering or explanation. If Nakari doesn’t show up in the next book in the timeline, what about it? The reader is smart enough to assume she and Luke broke up, decided to just remain friends, whatever. But it seems that the only way for a female character to exit stage left is for her to die, which is bullshit.
And actually, there's no reason why she couldn't have shown up again. ESB and RoTJ cover a month and a few days, respectively, of Luke's life - just because there was no mention of Nakari doesn't mean she didn't exist at that time, whether or not she and Luke were an item. She could have made an appearance in a subsequent novel, or Rebels, or the comics - she could have become a recurring character, showing up when the Rebellion needed her, or - heaven forbid - even have her own comic/book/show! Her existence in Star Wars canon didn't need to begin and end with Luke Skywalker, merely to service his plotline and backstory and abandoning the richness of her own.
No, the only reason Nakari had to die was to facilitate this:
It was a blow to the gut, realizing what that sudden absence meant. I hadn't seen it with my own eyes, but I had felt Nakari's life snuffed out through the Force, and into that void where she had shone anger rushed in - anger, and a cold sense of raw power and invincibility...I took a step to join in the hunt but stopped, breathing heavily, unaccountably sweating even though I felt so cold inside and the power of the Force roiled within me... I shook with emotion and power, and none of it felt the way the Force had before...I saw what kind of space it was , a black hole that would always be hungry no matter how much I fed it. I might never feel warm again if I didn't get myself under control.
Luke feels the dark side and is tempted by the boost of power it offers him, but immediately identifies it as dangerous and unnatural. I can understand why Hearne wanted to include this - it is a book of firsts after all: Luke's first solo mission, his first time using telekenisis, and ending with story with his first experience of the dark side makes sense. But it wasn't necessary, which leads to:
2. How to push Luke to touch the dark side without killing someone he has romantic feelings for?
Also, obviously, shite of the bull (or nerf, if you prefer). Even if this brush with the dark side was absolutely necessary for the novel's climax, there's any number of ways it could be achieved. At this point, Luke is fresh from losing important people in his life - Owen and Beru, Ben, and Biggs - lumping another death on top of that a narrative trick for Luke to react not only to losing Nakari, but the others as well. But it's cheap, the first card in the deck, and why not show a bit of imagination? Luke is young and inexperienced enough at this point that any number of things could be the catalyst - the whole book he's struggling with his growing powers, why not try and reach too far in the firefight with the bounty hunters, his anger and frustration with himself in not doing enough trigger the dark side temptation? It would work thematically and doesn't involve a fridging that ultimately has very little payoff.
Because Nakari is killed less than ten pages from the end of the book - afterwards Luke grieves, but ultimately chooses to honour her memory and be grateful for what he learned with her, recommitting to becoming a Jedi. It's all very surface level, and once again a female character's death facilitates a male character's development. Was it so imperative that Luke lost someone he cared about as part of this story? Sure, this was a time of galactic civil war, and it's far from unrealistic that these stories have a high body count, but who to make collateral damage remains an authorial choice, and in this case Nakari Kelen was (a) a female character of color, (b) a love interest of the protagonist - not just of this book, but the entire Original Trilogy.
I don't know to what extent (if any) race had to play in the decision. I'm sure there was a segment of the fandom absolutely livid that Luke Skywalker kissed (and maybe had sex with) a black woman. Was her death LFL hedging its bets, or demonstrative of the general lack of attention/respect they show their characters of colour?
In any case this was a chance to stand out from the old EU and it's fridge full of Luke's dead girlfriends, but instead they chose to introduce and kill off Nakari for the sole purpose of Luke's manpain and character development, and that's gross.
And then there's this:
A grisly yet reliable fact about custom bounty hunter ships is that you can always count on them to have body bags stashed somewhere for the easy transport of their kills. They often have built-in refrigerated storage, too.
NAKARI IS KILLED AND LITERALLY STORED IN THE FUCKING FRIDGE I COULDN'T BELIEVE WHAT I WAS READING.
I really hope this was unintentional on Hearne's part, because yikes. He was halfway there, this book was full of interesting female characters who had agency - Drusil in particular was a delight with her super math and inability to understand human interaction. Nakari was full of life and fun - capable but relatable, showing a different side of the Rebellion and those that suffered under the Empire's rule. Fridging her in her first appearance is considerably more vile, because it reduces her to a footnote of Luke's story, a plot device to Help Him Grow, rather than a springboard to tell more of her own story.
Because Nakari was a compelling character ripe for spinoff potential. I would absolutely have read or watched her continued adventures, juggling missions for her father's Biolabs company and trying to aid the Rebellion, shooting her slug rifle and cracking wise, maybe even finding a way to amplify her mother's song Vader's Many Prosthetic Parts to really stick it to the Empire, or try and free the political prisoners on Kessel.
The old EU was made great by allies and enemies of Our Heroes showing up again to help or hinder them, and/or branching out into their own material. We fell in love with them, and followed their stories even as they diverged from the main saga, eager to read more about their lives.
Nakari Kelen never got that chance. In many ways, she exemplified what Disney Star Wars was to become: an exercise in wasted potential.
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atopearth · 3 years
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Collar X Malice: Unlimited Part 7 - Adonis Route
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Honestly, I find the way Ichika joined Zero's side to be pretty iffy even back then in the original game, so I kinda hoped something like Kazuki dying would have changed here but I guess not.. I feel sorry for Kazuki that they reconciled but she still ended up joining Adonis alongside Akito, it must be a pretty big shock having to deal with that. (EDIT: guess he is gone..) Ichika being at the top and training people in marksmanship and stuff is very interesting lol. She looks all right with short hair but yeah, I agree with Zero, I liked the long hair more. Anyway, Zero wants her to find out if there's a traitor amongst them before the next X-Day (since the one 2 years ago failed) in 30 days. Anyway, it seems like you go through each of the Adonis' executors' stories so that's interesting. I'm just going to go from the ones I least like to the ones I like the most haha, and then leave Mikuni for last I guess. Well, Hana's story first then~
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Kobayashi Hana
I guess Hana is as bright as ever. I quite enjoy seeing her try and dress Ichika up and make her cuter lol. On the other hand, seeing her mercilessly cut through that panda cake was pretty hilarious. One thing I enjoyed insight into was hearing that Hana has been avoiding going to Isshiki's concerts to avoid causing any trouble to them with the police just in case they come to crash it because of her or something. Honestly, I was pretty impressed. Like, she's always been pretty selfish, and she's always prioritised her love for Isshiki above everything, but to see that she could stop herself to protect him was nice in its own way. Even though she's a pretty ruthless killer, and even though she's obsessed with Isshiki, I guess she does think things through a bit so that Isshiki won't ever have to suffer because of her. Hmm Ichika seemed to reminisce about Kazuki, does that mean he died? Anyway, these investigations are short? Are they really just segments of story for Ichika to become friends with each person? Lol. I mean, Ichika literally did nothing but talk about random stuff with Hana lol. I actually find it rather endearing that Hana and Ichika can fight so openly about their feelings and understand that they actually do want the best for each other, it's kinda nice how they became good friends under such circumstances.
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Soda Manabu
Honestly, I kinda wish we could just pick one character and continue until the investigation completes because it's sooo annoying having to press on each one like 7 times just to get a couple of lines of story each time Zzz. Anyway, gotta admit Ichika is pretty judgmental towards Soda, and actively tries to "fix" him and thinks what he does is "wrong", which is pretty annoying tbh. Just because she doesn't understand games, she thinks it's useless to Adonis, and then judges him for his eating habits? Lol. Anyway, at least she tried playing his game though lol, and even got lessons from him haha. I see, I can understand why Ichika would go to Zero for "revenge" but not sure about the "sadness" thing if that's what she's going for tbh. Losing Yanagi, Enomoto, Shiraishi, Okazaki and Kazuki is a big hit and I can understand it shattering her world, but going to Adonis is basically breeding everything that killed everyone important to her. Anyway, Sasazuka's pained voice telling Ichika not to go to Adonis really hurt. I'm sure he's really hurting over the fact he didn't notice the weapons that ended up killing everyone, alongside survivor's guilt of being the only one who survived out of the group, and then now not even being able to stop Ichika from going over to the other side.. It's painful to see. Anyway, lmao, Soda is probably a tamer little brother than Kazuki. His words are harsh but you can tell he only talks like that to protect himself, so any time he swears, I don't bother taking him seriously, he's a hurt little kid. It's cute how Ichika mixed his hated eggplants into the gratin and he didn't even notice, but he ate the whole thing happily🤣 He's so adorable lmao, especially when his face went red and he told her he'd eat her stuff again (even though she shouldn't hear it), and then he ran off🤣
It seems like Soda regrets his actions much more than I initially thought. He was able to get revenge, but now he's even more scared of death because of what he had done, and now he's just in this never-ending cycle of fear, needing to have Zero's power to protect himself, doing his bidding so that he won't die, but at the same time being so scared of his life that the only time he probably feels "safe" is when he plays his games. I love how happy he was when Ichika gave him a SS tier rare item and he put it on, locked it and kept it in a special box🤣 That's so cuteee. Definitely enjoyed Soda's mini part more than I thought hahaha, he's such a cute little kid, which makes it kinda sad lol. Soda blowing up and getting mad at Ichika for playing solo and saying she didn't need connections when she made him realise he wanted to start building connections because of her was really...heartwarming. Soda gave up on people and a lot of things thinking that he could never have them because that's how it was considering how people are, but he changed his mind after Ichika so insistently barged into his life, and now to say that it's practically useless would be extremely hurtful to him. I was really impressed with Soda, and I'm happy that he even told Ichika that she can rely on him more, he's such a sweet boy🥲
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Uno Suzune
Lmaooo poor Shion, the woes of a big brother. I found it hilarious how Suzune would give him the green peas she doesn't like even though Shion hates them too, definitely something siblings would do🥲 I superrrr agree with Suzune about handwriting diaries instead of writing a blog! I mean, I have both obviously, but I definitely have different feelings when I read my blog and when I read my writing in my diary. Through my blog, I can easily read my exact thoughts and get to the gist of what I'm talking about, but with my diary, I can see stuff like when I started getting tired of writing, when I felt like changing my pen, and a lot of other feelings that can't be seen or portrayed properly in a typed blog, and yes, the memories of me writing all this usually comes back better when I've written it, mainly because I either say it in the entry or because I can actually remember sitting there and putting time into writing about my life/day.
Guess Suzune's pretty yandere for her brother if any kind of possible romantic interest from Ichika gets her other self to come out and threaten her about it lol. Anyway, it's cute how she’s starting to kinda think of Ichika as a big sister. Suzune willingly taking Ichika to Shion and calling Ichika Chi-chan is probably the biggest improvement you can get considering she could stab you as the worst case hahha. Well, Suzune was definitely cuter than I thought and seeing her so vulnerable, shy but wanting to protect Shion and getting out of her shell for him was sweet. Are there endings for each executor? Well, anyway, Suzune saying she would be sad if anything happened to Ichika was really sweet.
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Sugawara Rika
Lmao, I forgot Sugawara is obsessed with Zero, this is going to be fun I guess. It's kinda funny that getting a 50,000 yen strawberry entices her lol, I'm surprised Zero approved it as an expense, like dang, can I have one too, I'm curious lol. Lmao when Sugawara wanted to keep the strawberries as a memento instead of eating it😂 She should have been convinced when Ichika said it'll become a part of her hahahah. LOL when Sugawara started lecturing Ichika about dressing better in front of Zero, and then tried to get her makeup to make her look better, but then Ichika runs away😂
Okay, I loved the girls dress up night with Hana, Ichika and Sugawara. It was so funny how they started arguing about what Ichika should wear and then became fast enough friends to recommend each other stuff and then wear it for fun. I loveee that they had a CG for their new outfits because they're all so pretty, I love them! I think Hana's is my favourite because it's so simple but cute in a different way from her usual. I guess it's kinda cute how in Hana's investigation, Hana focuses on Ichika's clothing fashion, but Sugawara takes it further or I guess mainly focuses on skincare, makeup and haircare haha. I guess it's nice that Sugawara is definitely much more open about standing up for herself and other women when it comes to men who try to objectify them or think of them as "lesser". She's become stronger. I think it's kinda sad to see that amongst all the other happy mini endings with the other executors, Rika's one with Ichika is actually pretty sad because it was through them bonding that Rika noticed Ichika's true intentions of revenge, and that's why they can never truly see eye-to-eye and be friends.
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Ogata Tomoki
I guess I didn't expect Ogata to be the type to go to batting cages, but I even more didn't expect him to reserve sweets to make sure he can get them hahaha! It's nice that he enjoys wagashi though, I definitely should have tried it when I went to Japan, but I completely forgot😭 Aww, Ogata had such a sweet daughter! Whenever his wife wasn't looking, she would eat his hated tomatoes for him! Such a kind kid😭 I've never heard of monaka before, so I googled it and they look nice!! Kinda like an ice cream sandwich but not with ice cream and has red bean paste and other stuff inside I guess? I would totally eat it. Lmaoo at Ichika's impression of the typical salaryman😂😂 It's true though, I can't imagine Ogata going home to watch comedy shows with a beer in his hand🤣 Aww it was so cute how Ogata did an impersonation of a character in a drama because he got so used to doing it for his daughter. But lmao at Ichika though, telling him what he can improve on since Adonis might have end of the year parties he could use it for, imagine a bunch of terrorists partying for something so normal like the end of the year hahah😂😂
It's actually really sad how Ogata feels like he can't be a father anymore because he knows that he prioritises his current ideals and dreams more than his daughter. And I guess considering how long they've been separated and how much he has changed, it would probably feel awkward to try and be a normal father, but I guess at least through Ichika's encouragement, he's willing to try and reply to his daughter's letter of wanting to meet him. I think the reason why I've always liked Ogata is because he doesn't regret his actions. Like, he knows that he's killed people and that's why he doesn't want to see his family and get them involved with what he's doing right now, because he knows the gravity of his actions. But at the same time, his hatred for Fujii, the police and the whole mistaken arrest that led to such injustice for him and changed his whole perspective on life is something he can't let go of, and that's why it led him to Adonis and to fulfill his "new" ideals. He knows it's a path that will not necessarily have a "good ending" but he's willing to sacrifice everything for it, and I think that's what makes me attracted to his character. Anyway, LMAO at how insistent Ichika was on seeing young Ogata with a buzzcut playing baseball, absolutely hilarious when she was ready to tie him up with a rope and search his room😂😂 It's pretty sad to see that Ogata wanted to be like Isshiki and save people with his justice without faltering in this cruel world but he just wasn't able to do it because hatred was what fuelled him to move forward and not forgiveness or hope. But I'm glad he encouraged Ichika to listen to Isshiki's song and hear Kazuki's guitar, because seeing Ichika show her emotions again, even if just a little bit was nice...
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Uno Shion
Aww, it's cute how much Shion cares about Suzune, but also so cute how he's embarrassed to say he likes chocolate🤣 It's nice that he's more cooperative than Suzune I guess hahaha. I never expected Shion to like to paint though, that's interesting. Anyway, it's pretty sad to think that the "outside world" was much more unforgiving to the Uno siblings, and that it was only after they joined this terrorist organisation did they get to feel safe and secure that they have shelter and food without people going crazy on them. In that sense, it's understandable how much more comfortable Adonis would be for them. Aww Shion and Suzune getting excited over a chocolate cake is so adorable. Them saving up to buy a home for themselves is so heartwarming, it makes me really want to cheer for them. I'm dying from how cute they are trying to feed Ichika the chocolate cake too because they really like her and think she's really kind like their mother was before. Shion buying a cheese tart for both Ichika and Suzune was sweet, she's like a part of his thought process when buying stuff for his sister hahaha. Lol when he just shoved it into her mouth instead of giving it to her like a normal person🤣 Lmaoo when Shion drew a portrait of Ichika stuffing herself with cheese tart🤣 To think that Shion was so serious about drawing that he's actually thinking about a future with it after the X-Day stuff..it’s so endearing.
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Sera Akito
It must be difficult for both Akito and Ichika to talk to each other. Just seeing each other's faces would make them remember the past and compare it to the present, making their whole encounter just...painful to watch. It's so like Akito to hide that he dislikes shiitake mushrooms so that it wouldn't inconvenience Ichika and make her remove it from the cooking menu. Lmaooo at Akito being so scared of bugs, enough that Ichika has to call cockroaches dark fairies to make him feel more at ease🤣 I'm sure Akito must be hurting too, but his consideration for Ichika above himself really makes my heart feel so warm. Awww, my heart swooned when Akito said his ideal type was Ichika! If only there was an Akito route~ Anyway, I didn't expect Akito and Soda to really interact but lmaoo at Soda having spent millions of yen on in-game stuff, Soda is right though, gacha rates are cruel😭😭 Aww, it was so cute how honest Soda was about wanting to have defeated the boss with Akito instead of dumping him and killing it himself, since what Soda values is playing together with other people. So, Kazuki was stabbed by a guy who was influenced by Adonis into taking revenge against his bullies or something, and I guess Kazuki was killed when he tried to step in? Honestly, I feel terrible for Akito. He was already feeling doubts and guilt over getting revenge for his sister, but after experiencing Kazuki's death, he must hate his choice for joining Adonis even more than before. It honestly broke my heart to see Akito break down like that not knowing how he could atone for his sins in causing Kazuki's death. His heartwrenching screams really cut me and made me tear up from all the pain Akito must have been bottling up all this time. Akito will always be my favourite side character, I think his pain, his feelings and his emotions were portrayed so well.
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Sanjo Keisuke
Aww, Sanjo's favourite food being ramen is very him, kinda hahaha. I can't imagine a 7kg bowl of ramen and having to finish that in 30 minutes😱 On the other hand, Sanjo being into arcades is kinda unexpected, lmaooo at Ichika thinking he would play the crane games😂 I didn't think about the fact that Ichika is a former cop just like him now, I wonder how he feels about that or whether he even cares😅 Lmao at Sanjo seriously answering Ichika what his type of woman is and then even describing the body shape with sound effects😂 I can't believe Ichika just tickled Sanjo and made him laugh like crazy, I would have liked to see that😆😆 I think it would have been so nice if Ogata was Sanjo's boss, I feel like their values and ideals of justice back in the day would have matched well since Sanjo probably desired something "pure" back in the day and hoped to be a part of an organisation that helped people, and Ogata was always helping people already, so they would have worked well together. It's just sad that they both got betrayed by their ideals of what the police should have been to them and others.
 The idea that you can't feel any fear because you don't value your life is a pretty interesting and saddening thought. Maybe because I get that feeling sometimes. I agree with Sanjo, Zero definitely doesn't truly care about those ideals of saving the weak that he keeps spouting, he's not like Mikuni, and that's also imo the reason why Zero believes that he and Mikuni will never truly understand each other. Ichika and Sanjo eating ramen together is so cute lol.
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Mikuni Rei
Lmao at Zero calling Mikuni an old man for liking fish, disliking carbonated drinks and other junk food because they're not nutritional hahaha. Otherwise, nothing much to say tbh, Mikuni has always been a rather bland character to me? I like him, but at the same time I don't because even though it's interesting to see that he actually has "noble" goals compared to Zero, the fact is that Mikuni as he himself said has been told that he's a "saviour" of sorts, and I think that really exemplifies the type of person Mikuni is. Someone who believes that he can and wants to "save" people in his own way as if he is someone above them all, but at the same time, he is very apparently flawed exactly because he is like that. He's not someone who truly understands the people "below" him and he also doesn't seem to perceive that as something that can be helped, and that's why even though his goals are "noble", he's not really noble at all. But it doesn't really change the fact that Mikuni is kind in his own way though. Mikuni eating shrimp crackers is so cute😂
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Saeki Yuzuru
To be honest, I've always liked the chill policeman Saeki, and I personally think Zero likes that version of himself too. I feel like he always enjoyed just talking about stuff with Ichika during their drinking charades, and had fun visiting her. But at the same time, I feel like because of the existence of Adonis and Mikuni, Zero never really allowed his negative emotions to be "accepted" in order for him to move on, so instead it just continued piling up inside to the point of indifference towards the world and others imo. Anyway, it's sad, seeing Zero and Mikuni happily play chess together. They really look like two brothers just having fun in their own way. Hearing them say that they've been doing this since they were kids makes it all the more saddening when they realised that despite how "close" they were to each other, they never really understood each other. In a sense, I feel like in the end, both Mikuni and Zero use Adonis as a way to get the things they want and feel like it's one of the only ways they can do it? I mean, I do feel like Mikuni treasures his relationship with Zero more than Adonis or anything else, because when it comes down to it, I feel like he tries really hard to understand Zero by trying to see things from his perspective and hanging out with Ichika, the one that Zero thinks understands him best and the one Zero likes the most. On the other hand, Zero seems to use Adonis as a way for revenge of his mother and as a way to vent those emotions and scars he got, but at the same time Adonis also granted him Mikuni (a brother), and it gave him opportunities and power.
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Zero definitely loves Ichika in an obsessed way, probably the only way he thinks he can love someone, since he doesn't want to become "weak" like his mother was. So if he felt anything like love, he would prefer it to be a love that would destroy him, because in a sense I think I can understand that sentiment of wanting the person you love to solely focus on yourself and no one else, whether that is hatred or whatever emotion doesn't matter, because being the entire focus of someone else's is a sort of "love" to enjoy, so I don't blame Zero for his twisted "love" lol. Especially since you can tell how much he has always enjoyed his after work beers and just chatting with Ichika. I quite enjoyed their little date walking around reminiscing the past and discovering new things they missed out on, now I really want to eat crepes🥲 The ending where Ichika kills Saeki is pretty sad though. Seeing Saeki the most relieved and happy he has ever been is probably what made me kinda happy for him though. He still sucks, but like Ichika said, I can't hate him, because it was true that he did reduce the sadness of many (whilst creating sadness for many others too though) and at the core, he was like in a sense a guy who consumed so much sadness from everywhere around him, always in pain, always sad despite his appearance, and thinking that makes it difficult for me to truly hate him.
Overall, I like the Adonis route! Initially, I was a bit sceptical whether it was really necessary and whether it would be interesting at all but I really loved bonding with all the executors. Seeing more of the human and emotional sides, seeing them warm up to Ichika and become friends with her really made me enjoy the "what could never be" part of it all. I think I especially loved Akito's because of how emotional it was tying into Kazuki and everything. But I also really enjoyed seeing the different sides of all of them. It really makes me wish Ichika got an individual route with like Akito and Sanjo and Ogata because I loveee them🥲🥲
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Overall Review
I definitely enjoyed CxM: Unlimited much more than I thought I would! In the beginning, Sasazuka and Okazaki's routes kinda made me wonder whether I really wanted to continue this, but I'm so glad I got through them because I enjoyed Enomoto's, Yanagi's and Shiraishi's routes a lot! If I ranked them, I probably liked Shiraishi's the most, then Yanagi, Enomoto, Okazaki and then Sasazuka. It's definitely what I wanted in a fandisk, which is more fluffy romance and just bonding with all the guys even more, and I absolutely loveeee the potential romances with Yoshinari and Minegishi, they were so unexpectedly nice. Definitely no plot but that's okay since it's a fandisc and I think it fulfilled really well what its goal was when it comes to more romance in the story haha. 8/10! I'm definitely going to miss the characters, I'm so attached to Enomoto and them lol.
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introvertguide · 3 years
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15 Badass Movies for a Fun Time at Home or with Friends
There is a buzz in the air as COVID-19 vaccines are rolling out and the hope of having a movie night with friends is again becoming a reality. Watching alone isn’t as fun because I want to talk to somebody about what I have just seen. A full theater does not agree with my introvert nature because somebody screaming or laughing or talking on their phone will ruin it for me. Watching with a fellow cinephile or two is perfect. But what to watch first? People have been stuck inside, so fantasy and alternative worlds have been overly popular. All I do is talk over zoom for a living. I think what I need most right now is a movie about realistic people with realistic skills that go into a situation and just wreck house. I need a badass movie. What is this “badass” movie you might say? Well, here are some basic criteria: 1) There must be a tough lead character who kicks butt while spouting one liners and doesn’t need superhuman powers (high levels of peak skill with speed, aim, or strength is OK if they are plausible in the real world), 2) most of the characters (good and bad) must be likable, admirable or at least memorable, 3) the lead must face and defeat overwhelming odds against them, and 4) extra points for memorable one liners. Also, I am only dealing with human protagonists (sorry Terminator), but slightly superhuman opposition is acceptable. This list is by no means exhaustive, it is just an example of some badass movies. So in no particular order:
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1) Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981)
To start off the list, I want to mention the most well known American badass. Indiana Jones is a smart guy with a gun and a whip. He is rugged and punches guys in the face. He has weaknesses but works through them to get the job done. Harrison Ford was in his early 40s for this role and had this tough-as-nails and seen the world kind of feel while still being young enough to fight hand to hand. Any of the first three films featuring Indiana Jones would work here, but this is the original and it started the fun. Easy to watch. Easy to cheer for. Great movie. You can’t really go wrong with any age or group with this one. 
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2) 13 Assassins (2010)
This movie is extremely badass but not for everyone. This is one of the goriest films I have ever seen as 13 warriors kill off a couple of hundred soldiers and the evil leader that they guard. The movie was directed by Japanese extreme horror icon Takashi Miike if that means anything to you (hey made Audition and Ichi the Killer). The movie has gallons of blood, but also an amazing story of redemption and honor. There are tons of scenes of a single warrior taking on dozens of soldiers and managing to overcome. Not for everyone, but still very much a badass movie.
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3) The Raid (2011)
This is an Indonesian action thriller with the word action in bold. The film is directed by Gareth Evans and stars Iko Uwais as part of a small police force that tries to take down an old building that houses a drug lord and his violent gang. It has a lot of what I like in badass movies: one-on-one fights between the lead and almost superhuman villains, long well-choreographed scenes, a banging soundtrack, ridiculous weapons, and ridiculous gore. The fight scenes in tight places and the use of the environment for weaponry is amazing and the sound design makes sure you can feel every punch. The lead character should have no chance, but he makes up for it with skill and being a pure badass. This movie is one of the few that I would describe as having non-stop action.
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4) Jon Wick (2014)
When did Keanu Reeves become so cool? I grew up with him being part of the Bill and Ted duo. He decides to learn martial arts and play a god-like being in the Matrix movies and then becomes a one man wrecking crew? I guess he is a badass because he does it so well. Keanu plays a retired hitman who is wronged and decides to go back to work for vengeance. He just won’t stop coming and seems to constantly survive out of pure hatred alone. There are 3 films in the series and any one of them will impress. Pure fun too watch.
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5) Casino Royale (2006)
When I was asking around, there were many people who thought that James Bond was the ultimate badass. I disagree in that many of the older films show Bond as overconfident with the assistance of many people. In fact, Q is more of a badass in many ways than James Bond. However, when the series was taken back to its roots with the last book that had not been made into a serious film and made darker, it reached badass levels. From the parkour chase to a poisoning to an extreme torture scene, this was not like any James Bond movie before it. Roger Craig plays a much colder lead who gives no quarter, much more like what the greatest secret agent would have to be. Heavy on violence but light on gore, this film is more for all audiences than other films on this list.
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6) Desperado (1995)
What makes this movie is not all about Antonio Banderas and Selma Hayek. It is that every other character is memorable and badass as well. The street standoff with Bucho’s men versus El Mariachi, Quino, and Campo is iconic. El Mariachi murders everyone in a bar with precise skill. The rogue assassin Navajas with all the knives played by Danny Trejo. Nothing but extreme shoot outs and fight scenes with a ridiculous variety of guns and explosives. I think what makes this movie so amazing is that all these amazing assassins are incognito and, when they suddenly produce an arsenal out of nowhere, it is always a pleasant surprise. Quino and Campo are amazing when they bring their guitars. 
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7) Pulp Fiction (1994)
Truly the role that made Samuel L. Jackson into the ultimate badass. He and his partner Vincent are hitman that keep running into the worst situations. The thing about the film is that everybody is so cool. The characters are cool, the music is cool, the dialogue is cool, hell even the diner featured in the movie is cool. The movie only spans a couple of days (in completely separate segments shown out of order) but packs in 7 distinct situations that are all berserk. From the mind of Quentin Tarantino, this movie is dripping with the best characters traveling through the best story. Highly recommend.
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8) Leon: The Professional (1994)
Also known simply as The Professional in the U.S., this film features the debut of Natalie Portman. It is directed by Luc Besson at his best period, right between La Femme Nakita and The Fifth Element. The lead is actually a quiet hitman who reluctantly takes a little 12-year-old girl on as an apprentice to become a paid assassin. Her parents were killed by a corrupt cop and she wants Leon to help her exact revenge. He is an absolute badass and somewhat of a caring surrogate father to the girl. Unlike a lot of the films on this list, the premise is not simply kicking butt in a bad situation. There is serious character growth. Apparently you can be a caring parent and a cold-blooded murderer...and that is badass.
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9) Kill Bill (2003)
Being a badass is not exclusive to men and The Bride is a prime example of this. She survives a shot to the head, kills deadly assassins, slaughters a gang, and takes on a crazy school girl bodyguard. She is tougher then any lead I can think of and she has the bad attitude and sense of vengeance that makes for a badass. Combine this with the soundtrack and beautiful cinematography associated with director Quentin Tarantino and you have a beautifully violent movie in which the hits keep coming. Even on this list, the fight scene between the bride and Gogo Yubari is insane. Also note the nod to Bruce Lee with the bright yellow motorcycle suit. Beautifully badass film.
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10) Aliens (1986)
In nature, there are few things more dangerous than a mother protecting their young. A mother will fight you to the death and make sure that, at the very least, you won’t be able to go after her kids. Now imagine an alien planet covered with hostile beings created in the mind of James Cameron and Stan Winston and you have a setting made to create a real badass. In the beginning, Ripley (Sigourney Weaver) is just desperate to survive and barely knows how to use a weapon. She meets a little survivor named Newt and then has a real reason to become aggressive. She and a group of marines fight through a station filled with super destructive xenomorph aliens made straight from nightmares to save this kid. The transformation is truly amazing and culminates in a mech suit versus a giant queen alien and it is extremely badass.
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11) Army of Darkness (1992)
Far and away the funniest movie on this list, this is the third film stemming from Evil Dead and again stars Bruce Campbell taking on the deadites that were raised by reading from the Necronomicon. The opposition is the undead evil that faces the world which makes the violence very unrealistic. This was early work from Sam Raimi and features a variety of different shots done to the extreme. What really makes this film stand out is how Bruce Campbell is amazing at delivering a one liner. His classic quips have been used as fun Easter eggs in video games like Duke Nukem and World of Warcraft for decades. The quintessential horror comedy and a perfect example of a badass.
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12) Die Hard (1988)
Apparently, I am a big fan of single characters that need to work their way through a building of villains using mostly intelligence and the element of surprise. Throw in some one liners and I am all for it. That is exactly what this is with Bruce Willis crawling barefoot around a 40 story building and fighting off a gang of villains. The movie also has Alan Rickman as the main bad guy and he is chewing the scenery. This is a great example of being a badass, but it is too bad that the follow up sequels were so poor. Definitely stick to the original and let the rest pass by.
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13) The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly (1966)
An OG of the badass movie genre, this is some of the best of Sergio Leone and the spaghetti western. Instead of one badass, this movie has three different leads that are all amazing. You have the good, Clint Eastwood, who is an amazing shot and a heart of gold under a rough exterior. You have the bad, Lee Van Cleef, playing an conniving assassin that will kill anyone that he doesn’t have a use for. Finally, you have the ugly, Eli Wallach, as a desert rat that will do anything to survive. They all gain information about a gold stash and need to work together to get it, but this creates a vortex of cheating, undercutting, and straight up murder. Clint Eastwood is more of the classic badass with his cigar, hat, and poncho, It is an iconic look on an iconic character in an iconic movie. That is what I call badass.
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14) Ong-Bak (2003)
This less of a badass movie and more houses some of the most amazingly badass fight scenes that can only be described as badass. This movie introduced the great Tony Jaa to the western world and showed the high flying nature of Thai boxing and Muay Thai in general. The main character is entered into a street fighting tournament and the moves include a flying double knee drop and a full splits kick. If the whole movie was the tournament, it would be the best movie that ever existed. The variety of opponents makes the fighting even better and the cinematography is top notch. Tony Jaa is truly badass in this film.
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15) Dredd (2012)
Not the crappy version with Stallone, this movie is seriously badass. It features Karl Urban who is helmeted for the entire film (as Dredd would be) taking on a 200 story mega slum filled with residents that want to shoot him dead. There is a drug dealer high up in the building and she locks down the entire compound with instructions to kill Dredd, who only has his rookie partner to help. He takes on random resident mobs, groups of gang members, and even a trio of mini guns that have bullets that can rip through walls. He has a smart gun with a bunch of ammo that he uses judiciously to kill everybody. This movie was seriously underrated since it had not been that long since the garbage Judge Dredd came out in 1995. The 2012 is a far superior movie, being much more violent and dark instead of having Rob Schneider as the comedy relief (not badass).
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I know there will be a lot of opinions about what makes a badass film and what movies i didn’t add. Feel free to add your own movies or critique my choices. I will stand by my choices, however, and recommend any of these films for a night of cheers and badass action.
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Mr. Queen Analysis
My take on the rather heartbreaking and vague ending of the KDrama, Mr. Queen.
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  Okay, I’ve been thinking long and hard on this subject (way too much) and have come to the following consensus:
Bong-Hwan and So Yong are both versions of the same soul. What got me thinking about this was that scene in episode 5 where SoBong talks about original and past lives but then mentions parallel time-streams. To illustrate, she draws two lines running side by side and explains how a past life can be in one and the original/current being in the other. This had me stumped a bit, and I thought it a bit random that they put that in there, but then I looked up “reincarnation and parallel lives” and there’s a surprising number of articles on it - though obviously not conclusive or scientific as it involves spirituality. 
Episode 5 also explains why time in the present is flowing at the same rate as the past, which we discovered when BH’s consciousness briefly reentered his body and explain why they chose to reveal that fact. Time isn’t linear here but more fluid with both versions existing simultaneously - harkening back to the two lines Mr. Queen drew to illustrate.
The reincarnation theory would explain many of the elements of the story that I found hard to accept. For example:
If So Yong’s separate soul was in there with Bong Hwan’s soul then why did he never feel her? In fact, the show repeatedly makes reference to the idea that Bong Hwan does not feel another soul and attributes characteristics of SY to the body (telling her after the kiss that the soul is in control of the body so she ought to behave and in another scene he tries to get her soul to return by addressing the lake - where he believes she is hiding).  The only time he accuses her of being a separate entity inside of him is when he wants an excuse for his feelings and reactions to CJ. The “it must have been her that took control. If I knew it was CJ I would have....still enjoyed it?!? What’s wrong with me?” moments. LOL What if the reason he couldn’t feel another presence was because there wasn’t another? He merely had his consciousness wake up in the body of his past life but didn’t realize it.
It would explain the gradual integration of both personalities. For example, when CJ returns the book to Mr. Queen, she never thinks of herself as NOT being the girl from the well as she did when he first confesses his love for her at the lake. As BH spends more time in her previous body, the lines become more blurred not just in memory but also in identity because he IS her. If they were two separate souls, I don’t think she would have that same reaction nor do I see anything to indicate that So Yong “took over” in that moment or any other. Memories were accessed, personality traits were mingling, but we saw SY come out in episode 20...that personality was immediately recognizable. Fantastic acting by SHS - especially as she had me loving the one and hating the other, despite being both.
It would explain why Mr. Queen falls for CJ so hard, despite his initial protests. I never liked the idea of his feelings being manipulated, but I can get on board with the idea that he accepts his feelings for CJ because this is a man that some part of him has always loved - and falls in love with “again” through their shared experiences and journey.
It would also explain the question of why Bong Hwan. What was the connection between this man and So Yong? They are reincarnations of each other. When So Yong was feeling hopeless and needed strength, she pulled upon her stronger version of herself to help her - made possible in that moment when she desperately wanted to give up on life and he desperately wanted to live. She came to him in that pool and appeared to the queen again when she was looking for answers in the lake. This does not give the impression of a soul cruelly imprisoned in her own body against her will. 
It would also explain why, when Bong Hwan briefly went back to his body, So Yong did not reappear. She wasn’t being suppressed. She purposefully had her reincarnated self come to give her strength and was not ready at that time to assume her life again. I found her choice of words at Byeong-In’s grave to to be telling. She said he always knew where to find her whenever she was hiding. It’s also why I believe BI didn’t realize Mr. Queen wasn’t SY - for the same reason CJ doesn’t at the end of the drama. These two men, both of whom deeply love her, could sense it was her, just in reverse order. CJ-SB-SY and BI-SY-SB.
It would also solve the pesky issue of why BH is an overall better person - not just at the moment of his return but before. Someone on Reddit mentioned the implausibility of CJ’s political accomplishments causing a ripple effect to change BH, and I agree. However, if we look at BH as SY’s reincarnation, then the positive attributes he now displays in the altered timeline can be accounted for because he prevented his previous incarnation from killing herself, therefore in his next lifetime his soul didn’t carry those grudges. This fits with the idea of reincarnation as a person’s life experiences and emotions/grudges/regrets/mindset at death will determine the psychological and even physical manifestation of their next life. 
SY was told by evil Kim that she had no power b/c she was a woman - next life is a man. 
SY had her love cruelly rejected - next life is a playboy who doesn’t seem to believe in love. 
SY felt that she was living a lie - next life is a man who doesn’t care who he offends with his opinion and does what he wants when he wants - to the point of selfishness - though this changes when he prevents many of these resentments by his actions in the past. 
Finally, it would explain why CJ is so “oblivious” at end of the show. He promised when he returned the book to SB that he would never fail to recognize her, and he doesn’t. While her personality has changed, it’s intrinsically also the same person, though this is the area I felt the writers dropped the ball in execution, but I get that they were pressed for time. The implications of this aspect also seem to be what KJH meant in his comment to a fan’s question of whether the king knew that BH had left.That it didn’t matter: SY or BH didn’t matter, only how CJ saw her.
So why send BH back? I believe they did it because it wouldn't make sense for him to live a life he essentially already lived as SY. Reincarnation is meant to be for a soul to grow and spiritually evolve, which it could not do by simply repeating what it had already done. Also, for some reason (I suspect so as not to offend Koreans by skipping over one of the most prominent historical figures in their culture - Queen Min), they still have CJ dying at age 32. This can be seen in the book BH is looking at when he's seeing his portrait, and is mentioned as early as episode 1. This was never going to be a happy ending for CJ/BH in the sense that many viewers wanted. Rather, he was going to facilitate the relationship of SY/CJ so that his previous life could run its course...ugh, I feel sick typing that out...with the hope that they meet again in another lifetime. Our SB is many things but trapped in Joseon without modern medicine, a miracle worker she is not. CJ dies without any heirs; his baby with the queen dies at just six months. If the BH decided to stay for love and then lost the baby and CJ, that would be just as heartbreaking for me as the ending I received. 
Wiki and other sources speculate the CJ was poisoned by the Andong Kims, but many historians (including Bong Hwan’s mother, it seems) dispute that fact as it would serve no purpose since he was a puppet king and since his death then allowed the Jo family to briefly take control until King Gojong’s father pretty much crushed both the Kims and the Jos. In reality, he probably died of unhealthy habits and a life of excess. In the show’s world, who knows...cancer or any number of possible illnesses that could not be treated at that time. During the banquet planning, we see CJ suffer a nosebleed. In the spinoff, Mr. Queen mentions how CJ is trying hard not to collapse from the strain of his burdens. These could be hints left by writers to indicate that CJ’s health has been compromised by the grueling struggles and stress he’s had to endure, not to mention allowing himself to get blown up.
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They writers did give us the hope for another reunion - perhaps in BH’s lifetime or perhaps another one. It’s why I think they tried to imply a SY/CJ connection in the Bamboo Forest prequel (the only prequel in the spinoff) as well as end Bamboo Forest with a reincarnation wish. The setup seemed quite intentional and in specific order. The prequel created a sense of destiny. The next segment was about Mr. Queen confirming if it was just his body or his soul that was attracted to CJ...literally the words out of the character’s mouth...and they gave an answer to that with the last shot. The final segment introduced the wish for CJ to meet his queen again, and he is clearly thinking of Mr. Queen - so why the prequel, which would seem to introduce a separate love interest, unless it’s actually not because they’re one and the same with the middle segment emphasizing the genuine attraction and love for each other.
This might not be everyone’s cup of tea; it certainly wasn’t mine, and I think the writers should have handled the leaving better instead of going for an quasi mind-wipe of all the characters’ remembrances of Mr. Queen. I mean, CJ went from being horrified at Mr. Queen acting like a perfect little queen for a few seconds a mere handful of episodes ago to just asking "why the formality" at a more permanent display of temperament and seemed practically oblivious otherwise. Then Choi and Yeon were "shocked" when So Yong didn't revert to her witch of the palace act and chastise the maids that were laughing by the pond - as if Mr. Queen didn't already change that way of thinking months ago. Not to mention that they were also nonplussed by the fact that their relationship to the queen had gone from being regarded as family back to a servant/master status quo. Even with the soulmate angle, there was to much deus ex machina thrown in. The idea of soul mates is a romantic one, but the execution of it fell through.
They should have never gone with the reincarnation route, especially if they were never intending to let SY have a true voice in the drama, even if it’s just a final conversation between herself and BH before he leaves, made possible in that split second before true separation. Viewers never got to bond with her, and in those moments we did see her, she was either a watered down version of the personality we were emotionally invested in or emphasized the opposite characteristics (demure, feminine, etc...) that we loved Mr. Queen for rejecting. Also, this angle gives us no true feeling of completeness and satisfaction. SY is with CJ in the past - we won't see them develop their feelings for each other and grow to like them as a couple. BH is in the present but who knows if he'll find CJ's reborn soul and happiness with whoever it is. Promises without fulfillment demand too much from the audience to fill in the blanks. If that's the case, next time just give us a tag line and tell the audience to imagine the rest.
Even if they share the same soul, we are given two distinct personalities and not enough connection between them in terms of their recognizing each other, acknowledging their feelings for CJ to each other in some sort of passing the flame moment that would make it feel more homogeneous and prevent feelings of resentment at what we perceive as an injustice to a personality we adore.
Instead of creating an emotional divide between the two, they should have just have SY die before BH's soul enters, and develop the romance between CJ and HB's as the novel and even that cheap and campy Chinese version did. Having SY there just muddied the waters, and became a distraction and an excuse for every emotional milestone Mr. Queen experienced, negating that character's development and laying it at SY's feet or claims of deliberate interference.
They should have chosen a fictional king and not boxed themselves into a limited outcome. Granted, it gave them a valid reason for booting BH back to present times, but look at the result: limited number of years with someone the audience isn't really familiar with for our beloved ML (plus their baby dies) and a huge question mark for our F-turned back into ML in the present with the hope that maybe the reincarnation thing works in his favor but who knows because they couldn't even toss us that small crumb which would have alleviated some of our heartache for BH as well as give more credence to the fact that SY/BH are the same and thereby lessened the feelings of resentment to the SY character as well. Or they could have gone with a multiverse theory and left it wide open as to what sweeping changes would occur. BH being initially thrown back to the Joseon era as a result of his dying would have achieved that because then the audience would have no reason to revisit the present nor see that the worlds were linked via changes upon his return and stuck with the poisoning threat averted. Blow recorded history to smithereens and leave that to our imagination instead.
Yes, the fish-out-of-water hijinks were great fun, but the completion of the character arcs/relationship/etc...shouldn’t be an afterthought. 
The other element I would have liked to have seen that was in neither of the televised versions (though the Chinese one came very, very close) but was in the web novel is the king fully accepting that his wife is not the woman she was, believing that her previous body was a man, falling in love regardless and she with him. However, I think we all knew that wasn’t going to happen in a kdrama. 
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fandomlurker · 3 years
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A Ponderous Rewatch: Bubba Bo Bob Brain and Cameo
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Can I just say that I think I’m somehow getting worse at keeping the screenshot count down?
Neither the cameo nor the main episode in this post are animated by TMS, so that’s not the reason for the surprisingly high screenshot count. However, the regular episode is animated by Wang Film Production, who are the same folks that animated the very first PatB segment and have done most of the episodes I’ve covered so far, including the previous one. I can tell they’ve gotten a better handle at animating our main duo in the skit we’re looking at today, especially Brain. Wang Film Production is no TMS, but they’ve gotten very, very good at expressions. They’ve also seemed to settle into a rounded and soft design for Brain, something that they’re kind of known for among fans if I recall correctly. Pinky can still be a little…off at this point in time, though.
Moving on, the cameo that we’re starting with is animated by Akom Film Productions. They’re the folks who usually do the animation for the Chicken Boo and Goodfeathers episodes, and they usually do a pretty good job with those characters. As far as our mouse duo go, though, Akom has only done “Opportunity Knox” so far. You know, the one with the oddly nightmarish Brain close-ups. Thankfully we get none of that since it’s only a short bit.
So yes, onto the cameo in “Noah’s Lark”!
So this is actually a Hip Hippos episode, but luckily we don’t have to deal with them at all right now. The premise is the story of Noah’s Ark, obviously, but the character of Noah is done as a parody of the stand-up comedian Richard Lewis, who was somewhat popular in the 80s. The most modern and notable media he’s been involved in that people on Tumblr might know him from (or at least, what I think folks here might recognize, it can be a little hard to gauge that since both millennials and gen z folks are the main demographic of this site) are Robin Hood: Men in Tights where he played Prince John, and Curb Your Enthusiasm where he plays himself.
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Noah is rounding up two of every animal to go onto the ark (which is a popular depiction of how the story goes, but is actually false: it’s supposed to be seven male and female pairs of “clean” animals of each species and one pair of “unclean” animals of the same species, but that’s as far as I’m going into that topic). He’s nearly finished the list and has just been mauled by the wolverine pair, and…
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“Lab mice?...”
The fact that he’s specifically asking for a pair of lab mice raises a lot of questions that I don’t think we have time to unpack.
The pair of lab mice that he gets is, of course, Pinky and the Brain.
And Pinky is, for the very first time in the series, crossdressing, presumably to pass as a female mouse so he and Brain can survive the great flood by boarding the ark.
…This is also a lot to unpack.
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“Check!” they both exclaim, although Pinky does it in a very deep voice for some reason.
Wow, look at the surprise and then hostile suspicion on Noah’s face there!
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Their outfits are very 1950s, with Brain even carrying a suitcase. Anachronisms aside, these two really went all out for the “we are a normal, heterosexual pair” ruse, didn’t they? Not only is Pinky in a dress and a blonde wig, but Brain even put on a little bowler hat. Why did he feel the need to do that? Did he feel left out of dressing up otherwise? Was he afraid he wouldn’t look “manly” and hetero enough without it? I have so many questions…
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“Whew! These pantyhose are killing me, Brain!”
Wow, for once it’s Pinky physically hurting Brain, even if it’s a relatively minor tug on the ear.
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“I think I prefer knee-highs…”
…Pinky, you’re not even wearing pantyhose. What the hell are you talking about?
Assuming that this is just the result of an animation oversight (which, honestly, I’m certain it was), we now know that his disguise went so over-the-top as to include pantyhose which Noah wouldn’t normally see…and also it’s a type of pantyhose that Pinky doesn’t even like wearing, which implies to me that this is something Brain acquired for him.
There is just so much going on in cameos like these if you think about them for even a few seconds.
Also, I agree with Pinky. Knee-high pantyhose are much less uncomfortable to wear.
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BONK!
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So the mice are allowed to board and the audience is left to think that their little ruse worked, but immediately after the two run off and are out of listening range Noah rolls his eyes and says
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“Who am I to judge?”
Heavily implying Noah completely saw through it and let them on anyway. Wow.
That’s the end of their cameo. Who’d have thought that this little scene would be the precursor to Brain having Pinky crossdress to disguise him as Brain’s wife so many times in the series? And who’d have thought that this very first time wouldn’t fool anyone at all?
But now let’s move on to the meat of this rewatch post:
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We open to Acme Labs at night, as usual, though I’ve never noticed until now how lonely and eerie the place seems if you ignore our mouse duo.
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“Pinky… I believe I have conceived my most brilliant plan to date!”
Oh boy, we have another first for today! Brain is very much a fan of using temporary mind control for his plans. It’s the method he falls back on the most, which is very interesting when you consider his various psychological issues involving having control taken away from him all his life.
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“I shall use subliminal mind control to take over the world!”
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“…Pinky?”
The hand-on-hip pose here is great.
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“Today’s inside story is country mega-star Willie Ray Cypress!”
Uh, Pinky? Considering that this is pretty much the expression you had while looking at Pharfignewton, I am very, very worried about you looking at the Billy Ray Cyrus parody the same way.
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“Don’t tell my head, my empty hollow head!~”
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“You know I wouldn’t understand!~”
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Same, Brain. Same. It’s just like Pinky to enjoy a song as earworm-y as this (not to mention how relevant this parody is to his everyday experience with Brain’s plans), but lord was the real song this is making fun of annoying as hell back in the day. Like, I was a small child at the time this song came out, and I still hated how often this would be played on the radio.
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Luckily, Brain pounces on the remote’s off button and puts an end to the nonsense.
But oh, the look of sad betrayal on Pinky’s face is heartbreaking! I’m sorry, sweetie!
“It must be inordinately taxing to be such a boob.”
Heh, Brain said “boob”. /inner six year old
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“You have no idea…”
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“Pinky, do you know what a subliminal message is?”
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“Something you leave on a subliminal telephone answering machine?”
Nice try, Pinky.
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“No. It is a recorded message perceived only by the subconscious human mind.”
Two things here:
This diagram bothers me because my mind always interprets the way they’ve drawn the bottom of the cerebellum as the person shutting their eyes extremely tightly.
Brain using his own tail as a pointing stick is very, very cute and I love this detail.
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“I have recorded such a message.”
He’s still holding his tail, aaaa!~
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“Citizens of the world, you are under my control. You will do whatever I say…”
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“Nice mix, but it’s not exactly danceable, is it?”
Oh, Pinky. Only you would sincerely compliment Brain’s incredibly dry mind control message and then immediately point out a flaw that has nothing to do with its purpose. Bless you, you stupid and wonderful little mouse.
I like how Pinky’s interjection startles the hell outta Brain for a moment, too.
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“If people heard this message enough times, they would succumb to my control and we could take over the world!”
Notice that despite Pinky being a minor annoyance and despite the fact that Brain claims that everyone will be under his control, yet again it’s still both of them taking over the world.
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“What do you think, Pinky?”
And he still wants Pinky’s input. It’s small and scattered and very, very subtle, but in my opinion this is Brain’s most frequent way of showing that he cares about Pinky. Brain likely isn’t even aware that he does it. Pinky might not be aware, either.
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“I think I’m getting dizzy and I rather like it! Ahahahahahoo!~”
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“Sometimes you hurt my head, Pinky…”
And yet, Brain. And yet…
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“The only problem: How to get this message repeated worldwide airplay…?”
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Offscreen, Pinky turns the TV back on and startles Brain again, but only for a moment.
Another great pose and expression here: Mildly annoyed, but interested and on the verge of an idea.
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“I just adore Willie Ray!”
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“I listen to his song twenty times a day!”
I…really don’t know why they chose to have this shot done with Brain walking over the “camera” towards the TV so we get a brief close-up of Brain’s mousey behind. It made me laugh, though, so I thought I’d share.
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“Pinky… Are you pondering what I’m pondering?”
I’m also kind of obsessed with this brief expression of Pinky’s I unintentionally managed to capture. It’s a bit of a smug, knowing, and yet endeared look. I’m sure it’s completely unintentional on the animators’ part, but I love the idea it gives me of Pinky knowing exactly what Brain’s thinking but purposefully saying something entirely unrelated to playfully tease him.
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“Well, I think so, Brain, but burlap chafes me so.”
To be fair, Pinky, I think burlap chafes everyone. And were you thinking about doing a potato sack race? That’s the only connection to burlap I can think of that would be in any way relevant...
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“Country music, Pinky. I will go to Nashville and become the biggest country music star of all time! Everyone will hear my record and my subliminal message and I will take over the world!”
In all honesty, that would probably be easier to do in the early 90s when this takes place since country music wasn’t such a…well, “dead” is a bit of an exaggeration, but country music as a genre is incredibly unpopular nowadays with the occasional notable exception. In the early 90s? Not so much.
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“Egad, Brain!”
This is the most enthusiastic swoon I’ve seen and heard from you yet, Pinky.
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“Oh! But no, no… It takes people years of hard work to become famous, Brain.”
Well, that or they’re born into a famous family. Or they’re just rich.
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“Why, take Kathie Lee Gifford for example: She did community theatre, and—“
I actually can’t find anything via Googling about Kathie Lee doing community theatre before she became famous. She seems to have studied music and drama in university, and had a folk music group in high school, but the only reference to theatre I can find is professional musical theatre in the late 90s.
It’s possible Pinky’s right, though.
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BONK!
BRAIN! …Wait, where did you even get that tiny club?
“Stop talking, Pinky, I must think.”
You… Brain, I think I’m starting to see why some fans believe you may be as neurodivergent as Pinky is, but in a different way. I can’t in good faith elaborate on that myself, since I haven’t been diagnosed as such and it would be completely disrespectful of me to do so, but if anyone wants a good little theory on that, try here.
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“I have calculated every ingredient necessary to become a country music mega-star. Read me the list, Pinky!”
He’s typing by hopping from one key to another, aww!
Eeeh, the lettering work on that computer is pretty bad, though.
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“A cowboy hat.”
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“Check!”
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“A southern dialect.”
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“Check, ya’ll!”
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“Nice, Brain.”
The way Pinky says “nice” here reminds me of this meme. Also, aww, Pinky’s always ready with the compliments.
“Working class values…”
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“I enjoy beef jerky and the comedy stylings of Gallagher. Check.”
His visible cringe at having to say he enjoys Gallagher is wonderful. I first heard about Gallagher through My Brother, My Brother and Me, but for anyone that doesn’t know, Gallagher is a frankly terrible prop comedian whose most famous act was smashing things on stage (usually fruits of increasing size) with a large mallet that he called the “Sledge-O-Matic”, ending with smashing a watermelon. It was apparently a mildly popular bit of comedy in the south. Does that sound entertaining? No? Yeah, that’s…that’s why Brain is cringing so hard.
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“A song.”
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“Check!”
A song titled “A Song”. Brain, sweetheart, I think you’re going to need to put in a little more effort than that.
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“A name consisting of not less than three words.”
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“From now on, I shall be ‘Bubba Bo Bob Brain’. Check.”
I would make fun of him for this name, but honestly it’s kind of genius in its bland simplicity.
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“And…a height of at least six feet!”
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“Aaa--guebuh…”
Whoops. Forgot about that one, huh?
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“Drat!”
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“There must be some way for me to increase my height…”
Gee, if only you had a fully operational mechanical human suit just laying around.
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“Hmm, let me think…”
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“Don’t hurt yourself, Pinky.”
He is trying his best!
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“Faster, Pinky! Faster!”
…Why does Pinky have to spin the thread? The whole point of sewing machines like this is that they’re powered electrically, Brain. Are you just making him do this so Pinky feels included?
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Oh. Oh no…
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Brain’s “WTF?” face is great. He’s surprised and yet not at the same time, because things like this just happen when you have Pinky around.
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“You amaze me, Pinky.”
“I do my best…”
A very cute exchange.
So instead of using the mechanical human suit they usually fall back on in times like these (maybe it’s under six feet tall?), the mice instead come up with…this.
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“Proceed, Pinky.”
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I have to give them some credit, regardless of how ridiculous this is, as sewing denim to make a very bizarrely thin and tall pair of jeans must have been an absolute nightmare.
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“Ki-yi-yippee-yi-yo. How do I look?”
I’m getting flashbacks to the similarly deadpan singing of “Camptown Races” from last episode. Brain’s really on a western kick lately, isn’t he?
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“Oh, very nice, Brain!”
Your finger-framing may be focused on the back of Brain’s head for some reason, Pinky, but your pupils are definitely pointed a bit…lower.
“It’s ‘Bubba Bo Bob Brain’.”
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“You are my manager, Colonel Pinky.”
This is a reference to Elvis Presley’s manager, Colonel Tom Parker, who was honestly quite the bungler when it came to managing Elvis’ career. I honestly don’t think Brain’s making a subtle jab at Pinky’s competency here for once because Brain’s grasp of pop culture he’s not already interested in is surface level at best most of the time.
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“You discovered me playing the guitar on the front porch of my humble pig farm. Any questions?”
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“Oh, just one: When you farm humble pigs, how far apart do you have to plant them?”
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“…If I could reach you, I would hurt you.”
Hey now, you’re the one that asked, Brain.
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“But for now, on to Nashville!”
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“On to Nashville!”
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BONK!
“This is a pain that is going to linger…”
That’s what you get for rolling your eyes at Pinky’s enthusiasm.
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No perilous car trips this time! Instead, the boys are getting bus tickets to Nashville.
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“Two tickets to Nashville, please.”
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“Ooh-wee!~ You’re a tall drink a’ water, aint’cha, darlin’?”
…Ma’am? Excuse me, ma’am? Ma’am, are you flirting with The Brain?
Like, sorry, that “tall drink of water” saying is not just to point out that someone’s tall. It’s specifically for flirting with someone who is tall and gorgeous and a refreshing sight to see, like a tall glass of water on a hot summer day.
This lady is flirting with a mouse on stilt legs.
I know that Brain’s disguises are prone to inexplicably work even when by all rights they shouldn’t, but…
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“Actually, I am a lab mouse on stilts.”
Brain does his usual bold and plain truth shtick and I’m a little surprised that he didn’t react to what she said beyond that. Then again, this is Brain and he’s quite terrible when talking to women in general, so maybe we dodged a bullet here.
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“…At least he didn’t ask me to pull his finger.”
I’ve worked in retail and food service for years, ma’am, and if that’s the extent of your experience with unpleasant men, consider yourself lucky.
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“EGAD, Bibby-boo-bop-Brain! Round trips are so exciting!”
“It’s ‘Bubba Bo Bob Brain’, Pinky.”
“Right! Sorry. Zort!”
Honestly, Pinky’s version is much cuter.
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“Concentrate, Pinky, concentrate!”
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BONK!
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“YES! This pain will definitely be with me a while.”
Brain out here looking like a bad Minecraft texture.
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Hello again, Warner Siblings! Gosh, that little fringed western skirt on Dot is cute.
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“’The Rowdy Ranch Nightclub’… What are we doing here, Boobie-baa-baa-Brain?”
I checked the official subtitles for this and yes, that is exactly what he mistakenly calls Brain here. We have had both of these two call each other “boob” or some permutation of it this episode.
Pinky and the Brain sure is a show that exists.
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“…It’s ‘Bubba Bo Bob’ Brain. And according to statistics, and inordinate number of country western superstars have gotten their start at this very establishment.”
You probably didn’t need me to tell you this, but there’s no Rowdy Ranch Nightclub in real life. There is, however, “The Rowdy Ranch”, uh, ranch in Texas.
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“Egad! [gasp] Do you suppose Minnie Pearl performed here?”
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“One can only hope…”
Man, Brain, you are really laying the sarcasm on thick this episode. Come to think of it, he’s been slightly more sassy towards Pinky than usual this episode as well. I suppose he’s still sore about the end of the last one. You know, for reasons.
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BONK!
At least he’s getting some karmic punishment for it, I guess.
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“I am a telephone repairman from this area!~”
This little ditty this man is singing has bugged the hell out of me for quite a while, as it certainly sounds like it’s a reference to something but I never knew exactly what it was referring to until just now thanks to an old Animaniacs Usenet group from way back in the day: It’s a parody of the song “Whichita Lineman” by Glenn Campbell. The writers are really giving it their all with the pop culture references this time.
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“When I give the signal, play the subliminal message tape.”
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“Right-o, Bippie Bebop Balloola!”
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“…Sometimes you frighten me, Pinky.”
Why, though?! Despite it being a mistake it’s honestly a goddamn adorable one. Why must you fear affectionate, innocent, unknowing malapropisms, Brain? Pinky’s still going to do what you told him to.
Anyway, Brain is ushered onto the stage as a newcomer and he’s…not exactly any more eloquent than Pinky was just now.
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“Howdy, you all. Here’s a little…ditty I wrote. Hope you enjoy it…you all.”
Here’s the thing: Brain’s not one to get stage fright, and while he’s not the best actor he’s still usually better than this. He was saying “ya’ll” and getting the country-isms perfectly fine beforehand, although he was still doing it in his deadpan Brain way.
Now, suddenly, after hearing Pinky cutely screw up his fake name and going on stage he’s starting to mess up. It’s like Pinky’s error is still in the back of his mind and flustering him enough to throw him off for a bit.
He gets back into the swing of things when he starts singing his song, though.
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“I am a lab mouse, I escaped from my cage
Never had a job, never earned minimum wage.~”
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“He ain’t half bad.”
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“Ain’t half good, either.”
OUCH. That’s a little harsh. Sure, the lyrics are kinda blah but he’s a decent singer here. Really, it’s just not a genre of music that his voice fits very well.
Also, lady? You’ve got a suspiciously busty doppleganger in the back there. That’s got to be a bad omen for you.
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“But you will respect me, YES, once my plan is unfurled!~
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You will call me your leader, I’ll be king of the world!~”
Careful, Brain. Your complicated emotional complex is starting to show in those lyrics.
There’s some more nice facial expressions here too. I can’t really capture it with still images, but Brain’s got a very tender demeanor when he sings about being king of the world.
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“Now, Pinky!”
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…I just noticed that Pinky’s wearing a completely different outfit here at the nightclub than he was when boarding the bus to get to Nashville. He was previously in an all-white colonel outfit and now he’s in a more generic yet very sweet cowboy get-up. Did you make yourself an entire wardrobe, Pinky?
Another minor detail is that while Pinky’s cowboy hat is a generic tan colour (although before, it was white), Brain’s hat is completely black, which as per western film traditions marks him as a clear villain.
You and I know he’s not really a villain and is, at worst, an anti-villain…but I thought this was worth pointing out anyway.
“Citizens of the world, you are under my control. You will do whatever I say.”
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I love how he does this completely unneeded strum on his guitar in the middle of his subliminal message. It's for the drama!
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“Buy my record and listen to it twenty times a day.”
Corporations be like…
Who am I kidding? Corporations nowadays would have you pay a fee monthly to have a song on your phone playlist and you would never really own a copy.
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“Let’s buy his record…”
“And listen to it twenty times a day…”
Lady, that doppleganger is still over there. Do you need a distraction while you sneak out the back?
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This smug lil’ jerk. Gotta love him, though.
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And so Brain’s cassette tapes fly off the shelves at record speed.
Man. Cassette tapes. I feel so fuckin’ old…
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“I don’t know ‘bout ya’ll, but I can’t get enough of Bubba Bo Bob Brain. Let’s hear it again!”
JFC, that spittoon. Blegh! And just what do you need that rope for?!?
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“Well, he’s the hottest thing to hit Nashville since my mama’s jalapeno grits! Here’s Bubba Bo Bob Brain!”
Having just recently learned what exactly “grits” is, I am very disturbed by the idea of jalapeno grits.
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“I’m your biggest fan! What d’you say to that?”
Hi, Dolly Parton! I’ve gotta say that the animators nailed the caricature of 90s Dolly here pretty well. She’s instantly recognizable, unlike some other celebrity parodies Animaniacs does. It’s not just because of Dolly’s, uh…most renowned physical characteristics, either. That’s a very Dolly Parton smiling face.
Not much to say here other than that Dolly’s a sweetheart of a woman, from what I know about her, especially for a celebrity. She’s a staunch supporter of Covid relief and Black Lives Matter as well.
That said, she’s sadly—both in the 90s and now—most well known for…
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“I’d say puberty was inordinately kind to you.”
BRAIN!
Well, yeah. That.
I guess now you can see what I mean about Brain not being very good at talking to women. Like, he’s definitely not ogling her here. In fact he’s just kind of…stating something he’s noticed and looking absolutely done with this whole celebrity thing. But Brain you don’t just make a joke like that about a woman’s bust size no matter how deadpan you do it, you ass!
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“Haha, go on.”
She takes it well, though, just like Dolly seems to in reality.
Still, though! Brain, you retroactively deserved all those run-ins with doorframes.
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Continuing on the buxom southern women thing this episode has decided to run with (seriously, what’s going on here?), we now have a brief parody of a Hee Haw skit.
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“Hahahahaha!”
“Hey, Bubba Bo Bob Brain, I just got back from France!”
“How’d you find it?”
“I used a map.~”
“Hahahahaha!”
Yeah, that’s an accurate depiction of Hee Haw style humour.
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“And the Country Tune Award for best male vocal goes to…”
“Bubba Bo Bob Brain!”
Here we have Garth Brooks and Crystal Gayle emceeing this awards ceremony. I had to look up who these two were supposed to be, though, since the caricatures are pretty vague this time.
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“EGAD! YIPPEE! Narf! Ah hahahahahaha!”
Aww, he’s so happy for Brain! And oh, is that yet another outfit I see? And a much more appropriately sunshine-y yellow and flamboyant one at that! Pinky really went all-out for this.
Again with the tongue hanging out too, except this time it’s more understandable.
“You’re embarrassing me, Pinky.”
And you’re continuing to be a jerk, wow. Someone needs a nap or something.
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“Pardon my effervescence, but your accolade is more than any bucolic mouse merits.”
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“What’s he sayin’?”
“I don’t know.”
Yes, Brain just used the word “effervescence”, much like in that one Tumblr Twilight meme. To those reeling from the fact that this compares Edward to Brain via their shared pretentiousness: You’re welcome.
Also, a Brain-to-common English translation: “Pardon my bubbly enthusiasm, but your award is more than any countryside mouse deserves.” Would that have been so hard to say, Brain?
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“…I’d like to thank my mama and Elvis.”
I wouldn’t thank Elvis. He was an asshole. But that’s probably not wise to say at a 90s country music award show, so I guess it’s understandable.
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“Oh, how nice!��
“Well isn’t that nice!”
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“I’m outside the Grand Ol’ Opry, where tonight’s concert featuring country music sensation ‘Bubba Bo Bob Brain’ is being televised worldwide.”
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“In two words: Bubba is hot!”
I… That’s twice in this episode where a human woman thinks a tiny, big-headed mouse on stilts is hot.
Furries, come get these poor, confused women.
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“You gotta know how to cut ‘em
Know how to shuffle
Know how to deal the cards, before you play Fish with me.~”
Hello, Kenny Rogers. I only know the song parodied here, “The Gambler”, again through “My Brother, My Brother and Me” and the long and hilarious conversation about it.
It’s kind of weird to have a song that was made famous by Rogers in 1978 sung like it’s a recent hit in an early 90s awards show, but ehh. Maybe the shelf life of hit country songs is a lot longer than songs of other genres.
And then you die in your sleep~
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“Do you realize what will happen if the world hears my song just one more time?”
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“An angel will get its wings?!”
If only, Pinky.
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“NO, Pinky!”
I think all this country stuff is really getting on Brain’s nerves. He’s being snappy and irritable and lashing out an abnormal amount ever since arriving in Nashville, and there’s not a lot of joy in the minor successes he’s had so far. Like, compare Brain smiling and praising Pinky for his work during the alien encounter spoof they did together, the last episode with Brain cheerfully singing to himself when he was certain he’d win the race…to now where he’s yelling at Pinky for minor mistakes that no one but himself is aware of and being joyless and faking pleasantries and rolling his eyes at the country stars he’s surrounded by. This mouse is crabby as all hell, and I don’t think it’s just because he finds the whole country western thing stupid and below him. This is a mouse who’s done and will continue to do degrading things to achieve his goal of world domination without this much jerkishness.
I think he’s still fuming about the whole Pharfignewton and Pinky thing, and the current plan being a very rural, country-focused plan like the last one with the Kentucky Derby is just exacerbating it by reminding him of it. Like, you don’t even have to take it in the gay way I am and instead take it in a “how dare that goddamn horse take the complete attention of my friend/world domination partner away from me and my plans, this sucks and I can’t believe Pinky’s just being his usual dumbass self like everything is fine and the same” sort of way.
But the gay way makes way more sense, fight me.
…Okay, don’t fight me, I’m tired and old and I really don’t want to get in internet fights about cartoon mice.
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“My subliminal message will take permanent hold, and the world will be under my control!”
Ooof! We’re back down to “my” control and not “our”. Jeez, Brain. You really are spiraling right now, aren’t you? Your attitude has quickly devolved from the beginning of this episode...
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“Oh, that.”
And dang, even Pinky’s enthusiasm is starting to get deflated.
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“Now, do you remember what you have to do?”
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“Yes. I need to make a dental appointment. I have horrible plaque buildup!”
Pinky, you do realize that unlike a regular, non-sapient mouse you can just brush your teeth, right?
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“The tape, Pinky, the TAPE!”
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“Oooh, right! When you give the signal, I play the tape.”
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“And now, I’d like to introduce…”
“This is it, I’m on.”
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“Good luck, Booba Bip Bop Brain!”
Folks, I swear to you that I tried to get a decent screencap of Pinky slapping Brain to figure out if he slapped his back or his ass and for the life of me I could not get it. The slap goes by just that fast and I’d honestly have to go frame by frame if I wanted to get it, but my video player will not go that slow.
Either way, Brain is certainly startled by the contact but is fixated more on the continued mangling of his fake name.
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“How many times do I have to tell you, my name is--!”
Uhh, Brain? Getting a liiiittle close there.
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“—Bubba Bo Bob Brain!” exclaims Kenny Rogers. And oh boy are these screencaps exploitable. Again, you’re welcome.
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“Yee-haw! Let’s start this hootenanny!”
Better than last time you came out on stage to sing at a show, at least.
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This time the crowd even sings along with him, and they’re not even hypnotized yet. Much better.
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“Now, Pinky!”
“You are under my control, you will do whatever I say…”
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“I will do whatever he says… Whatever he says… Whatever he says… Whatever he says…”
A confusingly consistent detail here: Every woman in the crowd has swirly red hypnotized eyes and every man in the crowd has swirly green hypnotized eyes. Why? Who knows!
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“Way to go, Blubber Boo Bean Brain. Narf!”
Heh, that hand flip.
It looks like Pinky is trying hard to suppress his verbal tic here for some reason? Or maybe he’s just realized that he’s messed up the name again and is cringing in anticipation of Brain yelling at him? Either way, poor guy… You really don’t deserve any of what’s coming.
And what’s coming? Well, given Brain’s heightened pissy attitude and his mental issues with not having things go exactly the way he wants them to, plus his obsessive need this episode to correct Pinky on this one thing that doesn’t need to even be addressed because no one else hears it, plus other repressed emotions…
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“Do me a favour and forget my name. While you’re at it, forget you ever knew me!”
Holy shit.
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…Now you fucked up, Brain. Now you fucked up.
Man, I hate the one thick facial hair on the dude in the middle. It’s so unsettling.
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“Hey, who’s that skinny guy on stage?”
“Who is he?”
“Get him off!”
“Boo!”
“We wanna see someone famous!”
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Yup. Look at what you did. You messed this up all because you were having a temper tantrum about Pinky messing up your stupid false name. You hang that head in shame. And you apologize to Pinky.
Later...
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“Tonight’s inside story: A complete unknown somehow made it on to the stage at the Grand Ol’ Opry.”
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“…Turn that off, Pinky.”
You know what? Keep it on for a bit, Pinky. Let Brain wallow in this humiliation just a bit more. He needs to have the lesson set in.
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“I’m trying to concentrate on a better plan for tomorrow night.”
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“Why, Brain? What are we going to do tomorrow night?”
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“Same thing we do every night, Pinky:”
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“Try to take over the world!”
Hey wait just a minute! You can’t just reuse this excellent ending from “Win Big” on this episode! Brain doesn’t yet deserve to get back to being cocky and determined after being such an ass!
Ahh well. He does get better, folks, I promise. This is just a rough patch. Brain is… He’s going through some things, I think. He’s not processing his emotions in a healthy way and it’s really coming back to bite him.
Listen, I understand this whole thing with Brain being extra grumpy and hostile after the whole Pinky dating Pharfignewton thing is largely coincidence. We don’t actually know what order these episodes were made in, after all, and the Animaniacs writers were not big on continuity.
Here’s the thing, though: I still find it fascinating that these episodes were aired one after the other…especially with a random cameo with Pinky and Brain disguised as a married couple in between. It makes for the beginning of a strange sort of arc that occasionally reminds us that, hey, these two mice are a duo and something is amiss when that duo is broken up or there is a strain put on that relationship.
I’ve read that after a while, network executives at the time tried to push for these mice to settle down and have families and for the skits and the eventual spin-off to largely abandon the whole world domination thing. They wanted it to be more sitcom-like to rival and imitate shows like The Simpsons.
That obviously doesn’t work. It can’t work. The writers, especially Peter Hastings, very much pushed back against the idea. When you have a duo of characters who fit together and play off one another so well, when the basic premise of a story is of a pair of characters working together to achieve a goal, and when those characters just mesh so perfectly and basically complete one another…trying to add another main character just puts the entire story completely out of wack and/or changes it into something unrecognizable. You can add reoccurring characters off to the side, sure. You can have a nemesis or two pop up and return every now and again. But with something like Pinky and the Brain where the main story is a small pair against incredible odds working towards a singular goal, disrupting that core relationship is going to cause a domino effect that will ruin the whole thing.
All this to say that I like this approach that’s going on here much more, even if it was completely unintended by the creative team: There is the element added of Pinky, off-screen, dating someone. It’s not something that’s brought up a lot and whenever it is brought up, Brain is irritated. We’ve seen at the end of the last episode where this development was introduced that Brain is unusually snappy, and now in the next episode he continues to be angry more often than he was before. It’s a more subtle and smooth way of seeing how these characters react if something or someone threatens to come between them, in a way that doesn’t immediately break the entire premise to pieces. Of course, it helps that Pharfignewton is…largely absent for all this and is only brought up every now and again. It’s not a perfect way to explore this kind of thing, but it’s preferable when compared to something like Pinky, Elymra, and The Brain.
However, after this episode Brain’s temper begins to de-escalate, and we won’t pick back up on this accidental “arc” for a few episodes. So to folks who are maybe a little bit bummed out about his behaviour here: don’t worry. We’re getting quite the breather next time with a very odd alternate universe skit courtesy of the Warner Siblings  messing around with character placement, as well as an entire Animaniacs episode devoted to a Pinky and the Brain skit…fantasy style!
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blackjack-15 · 3 years
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(Pachin)Koping Mechanisms, KuroSAWa, and Putting The Ring On It — Thoughts on: Shadow at the Water’s Edge (SAW)
Previous Metas: SCK/SCK2, STFD, MHM, TRT, FIN, SSH, DOG, CAR, DDI, SHA, CUR, CLK, TRN, DAN, CRE, ICE, CRY, VEN, HAU, RAN, WAC, TOT
Hello and welcome to a Nancy Drew meta series! 30 metas, 30 Nancy Drew Games that I’m comfortable with doing meta about. Hot takes, cold takes, and just Takes will abound, but one thing’s for sure: they’ll all be longer than I mean them to be.
Each meta will have different distinct sections: an Introduction, an exploration of the Title, an explanation of the Mystery, a run-through of the Suspects. Then, I’ll tackle some of my favorite and least favorite things about the game, and finish it off with ideas on how to improve it. For this meta and the next (CAP), I’ll have a section entitled “The Faerietale” where I break down the issue of genre within the game and how it adds to the experience.
If any game requires an extra section or two, they’ll be listed in the paragraph above, along with links to previous metas.
These metas are not spoiler free, though I’ll list any games/media that they might spoil here: SHA, SAW, MAJOR SPOILERS FOR SPY, GTH, Rashomon.
The Intro:
Full Disclosure: draft titles of this meta include “Yurei-sing the Tension” and “Using Your Girlfriend’s Mom’s Horrific Death For Fun and Profit”. They ultimately don’t fit the tone of the game (or the meta), but I thought they were fun…so you’re being subjected to them anyway.
Freshly out of the games of growing pains, Shadow at the Water’s Edge is the first of our two Faerietale Games, where we delve fully into Theme and Allegory and other such literary devices — which happen to support some pretty fine mysteries as well. As such, in case you didn’t see it above, both SAW and CAP will have a section diving into the Faerietale-ness of it all (partially because it’s That Interesting and partially to keep the intro section from being like 2k on its own).
SAW is interesting for a number of reasons (which I’ll go into throughout the meta) but one of the things that stuck out to me on a replay was how much it leans on Rashomon for its story about the past. For those unfamiliar, Rashomon is a Japanese film by Kurosawa Akira from the 50s that deals with the rape of a woman and the killing of her husband, a samurai, as told through four different points of view.
Nowadays called “a Rashomon episode” or “false flashback”, the idea of different, opposite points of view being shot and filmed to present to the audience is almost a cliché, but Kurosawa was the first to really bring it to film and to popular consciousness internationally.
Like in Rashomon, we’re presented with different views of the situation at the ryokan (including but not limited to Kasumi’s death) from our characters’ perspectives — and, like in Rashomon, no point of view nor opinion on what happened is ever confirmed to be the Honest Truth.
Was Kasumi’s death accidental, and on whose part was it accidental? Does the world stay the same inside the ryokan, or is it just as prone to change as the rest of the world? Is the ryokan a resort or a prison? Should you respect what your loved one wants for themselves, or is it your job to want something better for them? Takae, Rentaro, Miwako, Yumi, and even Kasumi all have different opinions on these questions, and we’re never told who’s correct, nor to what extent.
Finally, like Rashomon, the game is content with leaving a few answers undiscovered. While shooting the movie, Kurosawa was approached many times by the actors, who wanted to know what “really” happened in the movie — and each time he refused to say, wanting the story to be truly Alive in a way that it wouldn’t be if he answered their questions.
Nancy’s job is to expose the malevolent force in the game for what it is, not to heal the family, nor to make decisions for them.
And speaking of their decisions, let’s talk about what motivates our characters in this game. I know, this intro is already kind of long, and I normally keep this kind of talk for the Characters section, but given how much they intersect in this game, we’re gonna go into it here. All of our suspects here in the game are driven and informed by one thing: their coping mechanisms.
C’mon, no surprise here. It’s in the title of the meta for more than just the pun.
Because our suspects are living in the “Once Upon a Time” section of the faerietale — aka the past — it’s their coping mechanisms that drive them. Takae is driven by guilt over her daughter’s death and fear of a changing world; Miwako is driven by anger towards her family and personally-assumed responsibility over Everything That Happens; Rentaro is driven by selfish pride and concern over his loved one; Yumi is driven by avoidance and individualistic willpower.
These are all common when dealing with loss, and each of these tell us exactly how our characters are going to act throughout the tale. In a very real way, SAW is a game about how we, as humans, deal with the stories that we tell ourselves (another thing that it has in common with CAP), and how that changes the way that we perceive the world.
It’s the breakdown of Rentaro’s coping mechanism — his pride in always being correct — that causes him to Do Evil while claiming that it’s The Right Thing. Everyone else’s mechanisms are what allows for him to be as influential as he is; Kasumi is already haunting Takae, and Miwako is already feeling the world crash down around her. Even though the yurei is just wires and metal and Upsettingly Damp-Looking Hair, its presence in the ryokan isn’t physical – it’s psychological.
Remember, “a ghost doesn’t need to be real to haunt you”.
The Title:
Let’s be real here, we’re getting into the segment of Nancy Drew games where the (most of) titles just kick butt and aren’t afraid to do so. Like, Shadow at the Water’s Edge? Gives you creepy vibes right off the bat even without the yurei on the front giving you The Ring flashbacks. Properly atmospheric without being too specific, and “shadow” gives us the idea that we’re dealing with a monster that’s more ghostly, rather than flesh and blood.
I don’t even have anything negative to say about this title, that’s how good it is — plus, I mean, the acronym is literally “saw”. Awesome.
Let’s move on then to the faerietale behind the title.
The Faerietale
SAW and CAP both function, genre-wise, as a faerietale — a story with few characters, big pasts, legends and magic, and a moral at the end to tie things off. In both cases, interestingly enough, it’s our villain who gives us our “moral” — the Truth that ties the plot, history, and characters together, able to be said in a single sentence. In SAW, it’s this (rather chilling) statement from Rentaro that does it:
“A ghost doesn’t need to be real to haunt you.”
But let’s start at the beginning.
Like in a lot of faerietales, we have two sisters who are as different as can be, an inheritance (a ryokan rather than a crown or a prince), absent/dead parental figures, a wizened mentor related to our main characters (Takae), and a Monstrous Force opposing them and their ‘kingdom’. In this story, Nancy is the Dashing Outsider (not unlike the Prince from The Twelve Dancing Princesses) who vows to learn the secrets, defeat the monster, and save the kingdom, restoring balance to the ‘royal’ family and allowing them to prosper.
(And no, I don’t think it’s a coincidence that in this game Nancy’s the Knight in Shining Armor when CAP and Renate’s talk about them is right around the corner, but we’ll save that for next time.)
Having established that the game is a faerietale, let’s talk about why that actually matters (beyond the fact that it’s kinda cool in itself) when we’re looking at the game.
It basically matters for a handful of reasons: it allows us to figure out the suspect Fairly easily, it allows the writers to Allude to subject matters that are a little Dark for the E/E10 rating that Nancy Drew games normally get, and provides a bridge between the (overall) concrete games of the past and the more thematic, character-development-focused games that we’re coming up on. So let’s break that down.
Assigning our characters faerietale roles lets us see immediately that Rentaro is Missing an easy assignation. He doesn’t fit the prince, doesn’t fit a sibling — he doesn’t fit anywhere, in short, which is our first clue that he’s the villain.
Even ignoring the fact that the yurei is obviously mechanical, that Rentaro has free access to the entire ryokan in a way that no other character does, and that he’s responsible for upkeeping the ryokan (which is why it’s suspicious that he’s not the one Dedicated to figuring out the mystery) — which are all excellent things that point towards Rentaro, his absence in the faerietale points to a hidden role.
Since the only role worth hiding is either an 11th hour ally or a villain, and Rentaro is present from the beginning of the game, it’s pretty clear which one he is.
Situating the game as a faerietale also lets HER play with a few more themes than they normally can, given their target audience. Starting with a rather blatant implication of suicide, the game spins on to abusive relationships, overpowering guilt, and Nancy being, well, downright mean with her questions about a family member’s death.
While Nancy’s always been a bit insensitive, the mystery surrounding Kasumi’s death sends her into the realm of bullheadedly rude (to the point where you can get a game over for it). We see why this writing choice was made in SPY (which we’ll cover in that meta), but it’s one of my favorite things about this game; it takes a slight character trait of Nancy’s and gives it a character-driven purpose.
The last function of SAW (and CAP) as a faerietale is to provide a bridge between the older and the newer games. The older games tended to be self-involved entities: they began with Nancy’s room and ended with the letter to Carson/Hannah/Ned. As the game technology improved and the player base got older, however, that started to not be good enough; Nancy and her mysteries needed to become A World rather than simply a string of cases held together with a handful of familiar names and archetypes.
The first step towards this was the inclusion of the Hardy Boys back in our Expanded games, but it’s really SAW and CAP that show an Active Transition. Faerietales are often thought of, literarily speaking, as the bridge between children’s fiction and adult fiction; they involve simplistic plots and archetypes that children can easily grasp, but teach hard lessons about the world that adults will understand and resonate with.
The earlier Nancy Drew games, on the whole (there are of course a few exceptions), are largely concrete, like the children’s fiction they’re based on. The good and bad guys are simply and easily divided,  Nancy and co. are always the heroes and always do right, and the bad guys always go to jail.
The past few games leading up to SAW start to shift slightly; while generally our heroes and villains are still sharply divided, nothing is quite as simple as it seems (look at TOT, where at least a few bad guys get away and actually profit from their bad actions).
It’s here in SAW, however, where we see that take a sharp shift. Those who should be good guys (Rentaro is a Love Interest, he enjoys puzzles, he’s a ‘fixer’ by trade) aren’t good at all; those who should be the bad guys (Takae and Miwako behave a lot like early Nancy Drew villains with their cageyness, dislike of Nancy, and ability to get Nancy to Second Chance) really aren’t.
In case this point is a bit obtuse, Logan is the perfect example of what I mean.
In SHA, Charleena Purcell has a receptionist (well-voiced by JVS) that at first prevents you from talking to her, but isn’t much of an obstacle. It’s a cut and dried ‘solve this one puzzle’ and then Nancy can talk to the author as much as she chooses — it’s barely an impediment, honestly.
In SAW, we’re dealing with another famous author, who also has a receptionist — Logan Mitchell. Unlike the receptionist in SHA, who’s just Doing His Job and exists long enough for a puzzle, Logan is a rather spiteful character who enjoys hanging up on people, and does it to Nancy with Great Joy.
As a character, Logan matters; he has his own viewpoints, loyalties (that are explored in SPY as well), and his own idiosyncrasies that make dealing with him — repeatedly — a bit like dealing with people in real life. The receptionist in SHA isn’t a character, no matter how much I personally like JVS’ voice work with him. Logan is. And that’s a huge difference in the approach of the games and the shift from the concrete, insert-puzzle-and-go nature of the older games and the more abstract, thematic nature of the newer games.
Whether or not that’s a good thing is up to you, the player, and your personal preferences. But it can’t be denied that there is a shift, and it’s the genius of SAW (and CAP)’s genre-shift to a faerietale that does it.
The Mystery:
Our mystery picks up where TOT left off, with Krolmeister sending Nancy to one of his favorite ryokans in Japan as a thank you for her help in the previous case.
This is how we find out that Krolmeister is apparently Spooky AF, as the ryokan is haunted.
Nancy decides to pick up a job while she’s there (the ‘how’ of her obtaining employment and an E-2 visa so promptly is ignored) as an English teacher to some of the cutest (and one of the most disturbing) children in Japan, which is how she spends her days — and how the game gets away with it taking place Solely at night.
The more time Nancy spends at the ryokan, however — and the more people connected to it that she meets — the more that she suspects that the ryokan might actually be harboring a malevolent entity bent on wreaking havoc and shutting down the place once and for all…
As a mystery, the game is solid; you spent most of your time “on-site” at the ryokan, soaking in the very well-done atmosphere, with only a few moments in-game spent at other locations (such as the pachinko parlor, Yumi’s apartment, etc.), and the amount of work that went into every detail of the ryokan is staggering (especially the garden).
Normally, I wouldn’t hang so much on the atmosphere when talking about the plot, but it’s actually relevant here, since the atmosphere is part of the plot — i.e., is it the ‘atmosphere’ of the ryokan that makes the hauntings happen, and did the ryokan kill Kasumi.
Speaking of Kasumi, she’s one of the biggest open-ended mysteries in this game. Did Shimizu Kasumi kill herself, or was her death an accident, or was it caused by a Paranormal Entity, leading to her becoming a ghost herself?
The game tells us how Kasumi died — cleaning a bath that she had never cleaned before, leading to her drowning — but the circumstances outside of her death like her will and her premonitions about her death speak less to an accident alone and more towards Something causing her death.
In my own point of view, Kasumi — remember, this is the Nancy Drew Universe, where ghosts are actually real — had a bit of Prescient Awareness to her, and knew that her death was coming, though not by what. While there’s evidence towards her knowing about her death that could, if looked at in that light, lead one to suspect Kasumi of suicide, it’s unexpectedly hard to kill yourself via drowning in a shallow body of water. Add to that her future plans, and I think it’s pretty safe to assume that Kasumi knew she would die, but she didn’t plan and execute a suicide.
Of course, there’s good arguments to be made on the other side. Whichever way you look at it, I’m just happy with the presence of loose ends, as that’s not the mystery that Nancy’s there to solve — and, indeed, without the presence of an actual suicide note from that period, is a mystery that simply cannot be solved.
The Suspects:
We’ll start with (and yes, the names will all be in Japanese rather than Western order) Shimizu Miwako, the Younger Daughter in our faerietale and the current force behind the ryokan.
As the one (via a faerietale’s rules) destined to succeed, Miwako sure does get the short end of the stick when it comes to her relationships. Her causing/contributing/worsening the rift between herself and Yumi aside, her boyfriend is actively sabotaging her and her grandmother doesn’t think she should be the one running the ryokan, no matter how good a job she does.
As a culprit, however, Miwako would have been a bit confused, given how much she likes the ryokan and the good job she does with it. For a Miwako ending to make sense, she would have had to been influenced by an actual ghost, sabotaging the ryokan without wanting to and having your usual blackouts that come with Psychic Interference. It would have been interesting, but out of the faerietale genre (and out of the Nancy Drew game genre as a whole) and thus not a very good story.
Next up is the Elder Daughter, Shimizu Yumi, who left the ryokan as soon as she could and instead sells bento boxes in Kyoto. Framed as a sort of free spirit, Yumi doesn’t see any need for her to run the ryokan and instead does something that she likes and is obviously very successful at.
As a culprit, Yumi would have, to be frank, been a major disappointment. Already taking fire from her little sister and her grandmother for the Abject Sin of not taking on the family business, Yumi would have been way to easy, both character-wise and tonally for the game as a whole. The Elder Daughter in a faerietale is usually the one who fails (the Youngest Daughter almost always succeeds), and so it’s refreshing to have everyone but herself consider Yumi a failure.
Their grandmother and quasi-mentor, Nagai Takae, is the other person who helps run the ryokan — much to her displeasure, as tradition dictates that Yumi, not Miwako, help run the family business.
Because someone who resents being there will definitely be a much better worker in the hospitality market than someone who loves the ryokan.
Takae has absolutely no head for anything but her own ideas and clings onto tradition not for its sake, but because change is scary, hard, and (in the case of her daughter’s death) heartbreaking.
As a culprit, Takae would have been interesting, but absolutely impossible — unless she was working with someone else. And as interesting as a Takae/Rentaro team-up would have been, Takae simply has no motive for scaring everyone else out. She needs the ryokan to survive, to do well, if she’s going to be able to cling on to the things that she wants.
Rounding out our main faerietale cast is our Malevolent Force, Aihara Rentaro, the ryokan’s handyman and tech expert, who secretly builds robots resembling his girlfriend’s dead mother and uses them to scare people out of the ryokan.
He’s a peach.
Not only is Rentaro our only option for a faerietale ending, but he’s also just the best option for the culprit in general. Handy enough to build a “ghost”, expected in any place in the ryokan without suspicion, and with a strong (if dickish) motive). Like all Evil Wizards/Malevolent Forces in faerietales, he wants to ruin the kingdom and steal away the Daughter — though, unlike a lot of faerietales, he’s convinced himself it’s For Her Own Good.
Which yeah is super gross, but hey, he’s our Villain. Villains should be a bit gross.
Lastly, we’re going to look at two characters who are inseparable from one another for the purposes of discussion: Savannah Woodham and her assistant Logan Mitchell.
Savannah (as we meet her in SAW) is a former ghost hunter who now writes about technology (hence her presence in Kyoto) who mentioned the ryokan in a book about the paranormal. Not being fond of interruptions, she pays Logan to be her assistant so that he can deal with the calls that she gets.
She also brings in a nice little easter egg talking about CAP, where Castle Finster is implied to be the castle she mentions in SAW.
As a character in the Nancy Drew world (as it becomes a world), Savannah is an odd presence, in that she’s a sage without being an academic. Most of the ‘authorities’ that Nancy calls for information are professors, researchers, etc., but Savannah doesn’t quite fall into that designation.
Sure, she’s written a book, but ghost hunting isn’t exactly a…respected profession or topic — and yet, Savannah is clearly the smartest person in the game (and one of the smartest people that Nancy encounters as phone friends). This is great — Nancy herself is no academic, and I do get tired of the prioritizing of Academia over actual knowledge.
Savannah also gets the best lines, and her VA absolutely smashes it out of the park. I’ll talk more about her as the Nancy Games (beginning in ASH), as a lot of her dialogue is foreshadowing for our next games, but suffice it to say that, other than the Hardy Boys and the Drews, Savannah probably fights only Alexei for the most significant NPC in the ND universe.
Her assistant is no slouch in the Significance department, though.
MASSIVE SPOILERS FOR SPY AHEAD, IF YOU DON’T WANT THEM SKIP UNTIL THE NEXT ALL-CAPS PARAGRAPH.
Logan (according to him) started working for Savannah to make some money during spring break and found the job too weird to quit once break was done (according to him). He loves hanging up on people, resulting in Savannah referring to him as her “lil’ Georgia bulldog”, and would like to go out on a date with Bess (according to him).
Yeah, pretty much everything about Logan should be taken with a grain of salt, as he’s the one who tells it to us, and…well, Logan is a spy. A spy who’s assigned to Nancy at least as far back as SAW, who gets close to her friend(s) and reports back to Cathedral that Nancy’s obsessed with her mother’s death and thus will probably be used by those who want to know Kate Drew’s secrets.
He ‘fires’ Savannah from being his boss prior to GTH because his work is done; he’s completed the mission he’s been assigned and is now working on other things. Logan isn’t a ghost hunter, nor a receptionist, nor a guy who wants to take Bess out on a date — until he needs to be. Like any good spy, Logan is all things to all people, and it’s his tiny bit of backstory in SPY (easily missed if you’re not paying attention — remember, in Nik games especially there’s no such thing as “optional reading” — that makes him so significant in SAW.
SPOILERS END HERE, YOU’RE ALL GOOD TO CONTINUE.
The Favorite:
There’s a lot to love about SAW, so let’s dive right in.
The first thing I’ll mention, because I just mentioned it, is Logan, who is one of my favorite parts of the Nancy Drew universe, let alone this specific game. His VA is great, his dialogue is great, his character is great — he ticks all the boxes, and I love it.
Savannah is, of course, also a favorite; any game with Savannah in it automatically moves it up a few clicks in my estimation. Savannah (and sage-type characters like her) is where Nik’s writing really shines, and her dialogue is always a joy to read and hear.
My favorite moment is actually a tiny moment, despite it being the titular incident: the shadow at the water’s edge. It’s easy to miss, but when Nancy looks in the bath and sees Kasumi’s shadow for that split second…it’s the haunting that games like HAU and CUR really wanted to have — subtle, upsetting, and fully within the bounds of the Laws of Haunting that the ND universe has set up.
My favorite puzzle is hands-down the bento boxes. Longtime readers of this meta series (which will be two years old this summer!) will know that there’s nothing that I like better than a good logic puzzle, and the bento boxes are a great logic puzzle. It’s fun, cute, and I love that you can do it as much as you want.
I do love, lastly, that this game is a faerietale. Having read and analyzed faerietales for a good portion of my life, it’s nice to see that niche interest represented within another niche interest.
The Un-Favorite:
There are a few things in SAW that I really don’t like, as much as I think this game is great.
The most important is my least favorite puzzle: the frame puzzle. This puzzle is one of the few puzzles that actually make me white-out in Rage and refuse to play further, which is a problem given that SAW is actually a great game and I enjoy playing it. It honestly stops me from replaying the game as often as I really should, given its significance to the ND universe, and for how just good it is. I usually make my sister or my best friend play it for me, but I do actually have to leave the room while they do it because it infuriates me that much.
My least favorite moment in the game is a little different, given how good the game actually is; it’s the very end where, depending on the choice that Nancy makes, Rentaro’s apology is accepted by Miwako. Sure, Nancy says it’s unlikely that they’ll date again, but this is a case where the choice to tell on him or have him tell himself should result in the same result: him having to leave. Handymen aren’t thin on the ground, and the ryokan needs help, rather than the same toxic influence that helped bring it down in the first place.
While I appreciate the choice for Nancy impacting the end — I really do — it should say more about Nancy as a character than it should about Miwako and Rentaro. That it doesn’t is a failure in storytelling at the 11th hour, which is a shame in a game this good.
The Fix:
So how would I fix Shadow at the Water’s Edge?
First things first, I would obviously change the frame puzzle a bit. I don’t think it needs removed per se, but I would definitely shift it. Give an option to skip it, perhaps, or make it easier the more time you spend on that screen, or make it easier if you go in and out of it a few times. Heck, even having it reset when you back out (or having a reset button) would be better, since getting stuck in the puzzle results in Hours of Frustration.
Other than that, I would only change the ending choice. Like I said above, the choice is great, but it should be changed to show us exactly who Nancy is (not unlike the choice in GTH). Is Nancy the kind of person who would not trust Rentaro to tell himself and thus does it, or is Nancy the kind to give him just enough rope to hang himself?
Either way, we’re given a view of Nancy that we’ll see more and more — that she is not always kind, nor infallible, nor impartial. She lets her feelings interfere with her cases, and while sometimes that’s good (again, GTH is a prime example), sometimes the only impact her choices need to have on her is to show us her character.
All in all, Shadow at the Water’s Edge is a good, mature look at the Nancy Drew universe, and continues the thread of connecting case-to-case. While it’s ultimately imperfect, I believe it’s not only one of the most fun games to play through, but also to consider in the larger realm of Nancy Drew games and in adaptation of genre altogether.
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k7l4d4 · 3 years
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Midnight Striga: Fairy Tail/Owl House Cross Fic Episode 5 Part 9
Hello all, I am back with another exciting segment of Midnight Striga!! Admittedly, this one is slower than the prior chapter, but I still hope you all enjoy it.
Lilith strode forth, Eda hot on her heels. They circled through the Covention, spotting the representatives from the Major Nine assisting. The Construction Coven workers were rapidly working on structural damage dealt to key pillars and walls, members of the invading force held tightly by hastily assembled cells and chains, the Construction Head, and Lilith was genuinely puzzled as to where he had come from, looming over the invaders, personally guarding them. The Oracle, Healing, and Illusion Covens were working in concert, with the Oracles tracking down trapped or injured citizens while Illusionists either guided them to safety, or rescue workers to their locations, and the Healers had set up a clinic to attend to the injured.
The Plant and Abomination Covens worked to root out and capture the remaining attackers, many of whom were thrown into those same cells she had passed alongside the Construction Coven. The Beast Keeping Coven members used their abilities to track down and locate those stuck in areas inaccessible to the abilities of Oracles, allowing rescue workers to bring them to safety, the Bards using their magic to manipulate the pieces that the Construction members couldn’t move safely. The sight of the Covens working together, in harmony, brought a melancholy smile to Lilith’s face. Her mood plummeted further, however, when she saw the bodies.
Piles of corpses, so many they couldn’t lay them out properly and were overlapping in awkward lumps, were arranged before the Healers’ Clinic, families weeping over their loved ones, the ones who had been present with them at least. The rest would need to be informed. And not to mention the numerous corpses of Guards, some having died cleanly… others not so much. Titan, she really was a failure, wasn’t she? Shaking herself from her self-loathing, she turned to her sister. “Edalyn, I must ask, but do you have any idea what has occurred?”
“Well, from the looks of it, a huge fight.” Eda said, faux-humorously. Before Lilith could snap at her, she continued. “But seriously, while you were stuck in la-la land, that guy, Rudolph he called himself, said he and his group were part of the ‘Black Dog Squadron’ whatever that means, and that they were here to kill everyone for someone or something called Oroboros. Beyond that, I couldn’t say.” She recalled, face grave.
Lilith bit back a curse. Taking a deep, calming breath, she attempted to draw more information out of her sister; out of all the adults on the Isles, Eda’s knowledge of humans was estimated to be some of the best, by virtue of her regularly full stores of ‘treasures’ to sell. “Edalyn, I am begging you, if you have any knowledge of how this…” She gestured, to the corpses, to the crying parents and children, the ruined stands and damaged walls, ”all happened, I need you to tell me!” She pleaded.
Eda leveled an even stare on her sister, before slowly replying. “Lily, I had no idea how this happened, or what went into it occurring. As much as I hate Bonehead, if I had ANY idea that something like this was going on, I would’ve either let you know, or tried to stop it beforehand myself, maybe both.” Lilith searched her eyes, an almost desperate light burning within her, before sighing, accepting Eda’s words.
“As much as it pains me to say this, I will likely need your help for the moment.” Lilith said as evenly as she could, the bitter sting of acknowledging just how much her sister still outclassed her rearing its ugly head. “If any of these scavengers are still lurking about that are on the level of that maniac Rudolph, I will likely need your skill to defeat them before they can wreak further havoc.”
“Heh, glad to see you finally admitting my skills,” Eda preened, oblivious to Lilith's mood plummeting at her statement, before growing serious. “And yeah, of course. We may have had our differences, but I’m not gonna cut and run when kids are in the crossfire.”
Lilith nodded, relieved. She hated that she felt relieved; it was just another admittance of how Eda was better than her. Still, Lilith took in the sight of the dead guards, the mutilated children, and felt her resolve harden. It didn’t matter if Eda was better than her right now; justice was what was needed, and she would bring about that justice. She felt her eyes mist. It was the least she could do, as penance for failing them.
Throwing up her arms in confusion, Lilith exclaimed. “What I truly wish to know is how did Humans gain the ability to wield magic!? It should be impossible!! They lack a bile sack, so how did that-that maniac cast those spells!” She whirled on her sister. “Please tell me you didn’t know about this?”
Eda shrugged, feeling guiltily amused at Lilith’s flustered panic. “Eh, only for a few weeks or so. And let me tell you, it sure caught me by surprise!” She laughed. Eda paused, a thought occurring to her, but it was one she was hesitant to share. Biting her lip, she carefully broached the topic. “You know, I think I might know someone who could shed a little light on this whole mess.” She said cautiously.
Lilith zipped into Eda’s personal space, tightly gripping the front of her dress. “Truly!?” She asked, pleading honestly. “Where are they? Who are they!?”
“Well first off, personal space sis,” Eda bluntly stated, lightly pushing Lilith out of her comfort zone. Taking a breath, she added, “As to where they are, they honestly should be right here in the Covention.”
Lilith’s face fell, already fearing the worst. “But, if they were here, then wouldn’t they have had to face…” she gestured to one of the attackers being led to the cells, cackling insanely, “ Them?”
“Pffft! If goons like that were a serious problem, I’d be a little worried, but she’s crafty enough to stay alive, heck, she probably beat a few of them!” Eda cackled, before adding, with a hint of nervousness, “And, well, I hate that I got to ask this, Lily, but please keep an open mind when you meet her? Please?”
Lilith gave her sister a flat stare. “Edalyn, I have just had a rather large portion of my worldview regarding humans and the power and stability of the Isles torn out from under me, as have a large group of others. When word starts spreading, I have no doubt that more than a few people will either go into denial or mass hysteria.” She placed her hands on her hips. “Very little could properly phase me at the moment. So yes, Edalyn, I will keep an open mind.” She said the last part so dry and sarcastically that, if this weren’t serious, Eda would’ve been so proud to call them sisters. Eda nodded grudgingly, accepting her promise. With that, the two headed out. Eda really hoped the kid was okay.
Luz gasped and sputtered, nearly choking on her tears. Willow slowly rubbed circles on her back, calming some of her heaving and screams. Gus and Amity stood on the side, both feeling lost and awkward; neither was as close to Luz as Willow, but neither wanted to see the girl in such despair either. All three just wanted to know what was going on.
“Sshh… sshh… it’s gonna be okay.” Willow whispered, unbothered by the tears staining her dress; it had already been ruined from the blood and grime of the battlefield the Covention had turned into, but even if it was fresh and clean, Willow would gladly soil it for a friend to cry on. “You can talk to us, okay? And if you don’t want to, we’ll be here anyway.”
“She-She can’t be alive!!” Luz spluttered, tears clogging her throat. “She can’t be!! I can’t have abandoned her!” She wailed. It had to be a lie, it had to be!! Because, if it wasn’t… Luz would never be able to stop until she saved her, no matter what she’d have to do in order to do it.
“Who?” Amity hesitantly asked.
“My hostage.” Luz said glumly, her tears drying up for the moment. She reached into her jacket, pulling out a photo tucked inside, showing it to them, a watery smile forming on her face. “My sister.”
“Sister?” The group echoed, leaning forward. Staring back at them was a picture of Luz and, well, Luz! Or rather, they saw Luz standing by what they presumed was her identical twin. The two were still very much distinguishable from one another. The one on the left was clearly the Luz they knew, having a similar style, a wild and reckless grin stretched across her face. The one on the right, however, was shyly glancing away, a nervous smile on her face, hair tied back neatly with a pair of clips.
“Yeah, Vee.” Luz said, a melancholy look of remembrance on her face. “She was always my leash, even before I got drafted into Oroboros. Whenever I had some crazy idea, she’d talk me through it before I did something stupid.”
Willow and Gus sat down beside her, leaning close, Amity standing a respectful distance behind them, clearly listening. Luz continued. “One time, I got this idea to make home-made Lacrimas by shoving a bunch of magic into one spot, and Vee reminded me that neither of us knew how Lacrimas formed, and just stuffing magic into things blew them up.” She snickered, a tear tracing down her cheek. “And this one time, I was gonna try and tame a Wyvern, I actually went out and did it even! But then, Vee reminded me we had nowhere to keep it, and no way to feed it, so I found it a nice hunting ground, and convinced it to defend a nearby town.” She laughed out loud, a heavy, full-belly laugh that sent her sprawling, tears leaking.
She paused, tears in her eyes. “She was my best friend, the person who made every day away from home something bearable. She was my anchor, my rock, and Oroboros used her against me.” Her fingers dug into her hand, a pained look crossing her features. “If she’s actually been alive this whole time…” Her tears were cut off when Willow and Gus hugged her, both having tears of their own.
“Hey, it’s okay. We’ll get through this.” Willow stated, pulling away and looking Luz straight in the eye. “Oroboros is going to keep coming after the Isles, so you’ll probably get an answer one way or another. And either way, I’ll be right by your side.”
“And the same goes for me!” Gus chimed in. “Plus, my dad’s a reporter, so I can help find out new info for you to go off of!”
“And if I am available, I would not be averse to using my magic to fight against those who’ve threatened the Isles. Rescuing an innocent will be a nice bonus, I’d say.” Amity primly stated, sporting a confident look.
Luz gave the three an almost awestruck look. “You guys.”
“GET AWAY FROM THEM!!” A voice screamed, drawing their attention. Luz’s eyes widened as Lilith Clawthorne, Eda’s apparent sister, rocketed towards her, staff glowing with magic, her eyes burning with rage. Before she could smash Luz’s face in, however, Eda jumped in, tackling her sister to the ground.
“Sheesh, Lily! Chill out!” Eda cried, desperately wrestling her sister to the ground. “I told you to keep an open mind, remember?”
“What does that have to do with-” Lilith ranted, only to pause, eyes widening in realization. “Oh, you’ve got to be kidding me.” She groaned, hanging her head as Eda sheepishly chuckled.
“U-um… Eda, what’s happening?” Luz tentatively asked.
Eda really wanted to ask Luz why she’d been crying, but decided to put it off, focusing on the current issue. “Well,” She drawled, “My prissy sis here wanted info on everything that happened. And after thinking it over, I thought you’d be the best person to give it to her.” Eda stated, pointing at Luz decisively. As unbalanced as Luz’s emotions were at the moment, she could see the logic in that.
“Seriously!?” Gus cried, incredulous. “After what she just learned!?”
Eda blinked. “What? What’d she learn?” She asked, figuring that whatever it was was the reason behind Luz’s tears.
“Something we can talk about later. In. Private.” Luz stated, her face screaming ‘let it go for now!’ Eda grudgingly agreed.
“Ugh, can we please move back on to the topic of information?” Lilith growled, pulling herself up. She loomed over Luz, a suspicious glare emblazoned across her features. “I have a great many questions for you, human.”
“And I’m perfectly willing to answer them, Miss Clawthorne.” Luz replied, unblinking. She glanced around, taking note of the damage around them. “But maybe it’d be better if we went somewhere more private for this?”
Lilith nodded, seeing the logic in that. “Indeed, better we not be interrupted.” She turned to her sister. “If that is acceptable for you, Edalyn?” She asked, getting a shrug and a nod in return, the Witchlings following Eda’s lead. Lilith clapped her hands. “Well then, we’d better be going back to the main center, as I recall seeing the Covens building something of a camp there to deal with the aftermath of this mess. The Healer’s Clinic should have a room we can use.” And with that the group set off, a tension running through them after their collective ordeal.
Emira paced, frantically glancing about the interior of the Healer’s Station, Edric gloomily slumped next to her. Her eyes scanned the nearby groups, hoping to spot something, anything, that could give her some hint as to where her sister was. She and Edric knew she was here, but where had she disappeared to after being displayed up there with Lilith was the real question.
“Could you please stop pacing, sis?” Edric groaned, clutching his head. “It’s not going to just make her appear if you keep doing it.”
Emira whirled on her brother, fire in her eyes. “Well what do you expect me to do!? Maniacs barged into the Covention, massacred who knows how many people, and OUR SISTER IS MISSING!!! I don’t have a lot of options right now, now do I?” She brutally snapped, briefly yelling in the middle of it, before fading into a broken tiredness. All those people, those kids, all gone. If her sister was gone like that, and her only memories were of her and Edric pranking her… She looked into Edric’s eyes, and saw the same fear, the hopeless, helpless realization that Amity may be gone, and her only memories of them would be of all the times they gave her trouble.
Edric sighed, tiredly rubbing his eyes. “Believe me sis, I get it, but all we can do is wait, and hope she’s okay.” He patted the spot next to him, a clear invitation to sit. Emira gave one last furtive look around, and glumly complied. The two briefly wondered just how their parents would take all of this.
Bria bit her lip, glancing over at Gavin and Angmar. She didn’t consider them friends, not really. Maybe she’d change that? She wasn’t sure. She wasn’t sure about much right now. She… had been made helpless. Magic like nothing she’d ever seen had been on display, and a LOT of people were dead. She, Gavin, and Angmar WOULD be dead. If it hadn’t been for Matty. Matty; goofy, clumsy, always taking the fall, boasting about his skills Matty, had saved their lives. Tears pricked her eyes, as she remembered how close she’d come to death, the sheer heartlessness on display. Was that what she was like? Some kind of monster? ...Was that what everyone was like at Glandus, behind all the excuses about being powerful?
“Hey, I got your drink!” Matty cheerfully replied, holding a glass out to her.
Bria shot him a half-hearted smile. “Thanks Matty.”
“Eh, it’s no problem.” He said, waving it off. “After all, we’re friends, right?”
“Yeah, friends.” Bria muttered, sipping her drink. Maybe… they really were friends. She’d have to talk to Angmar and Gavin about this. Maybe Hexside was still taking transfers.
Skara listlessly handed supplies to Bo, who was frantically patching up as many injuries as she could. Skara just felt so tired, so hollow. So many people had died. She’d seen little kids ripped apart, their parents crying over their bodies. She’d seen the opposite too, parents being cried over by their kids and family members.
Skara only had eyes for one thing, though. Boscha. Boscha was propped up on a bunk, at least two rows away, but still in Skara’s line of sight. She’d been brought in by a little demon, screaming and demanding that someone help her. Skara felt a twinge of jealousy at the thought that it wasn’t her demanding that someone heal her friend. Oh, wait, they weren’t friends anymore. It still hurt to think about, even though talking with Amity helped. The demon was hovering around Boscha, ranting and ordering around anyone and everyone who got close. In the back of her mind, Skara was honestly impressed at how unrelenting and exacting he was with his demands, even if no one was following them.
Then, Skara caught sight of another body brought in, another corpse. It was Batthew, a nice guy who had flirted with her a few times before. He was sweet, in his own way, and was really fond of going over the top. His throat had been slashed open. Skara didn’t fight the tears as they came.
Lilith pulled up a seat, eyes glaring daggers at the human seated before her. One way or another, she was going to get the answers she needed. She briefly spared a glance at Perry Porter, a known and well-viewed reporter upon the Isles, and one known for being unabashedly honest and direct in his reporting, something that earned him several points with the populous, as they knew they could trust his information. The boy, Augustus, had called him in after they’d gotten to the emergency clinic the Healers had established, citing a need for the people to understand what had happened. Thinking of her own impending reveal to the public, Lilith had agreed. If all turned out well, both could be accomplished together.
Lilith leaned forward. “Now then, human, it’s time for you to answer my questions. The People of the Isles are dying to hear what you have to say.” She said, eyes half-lidded.
Luz placed her hands on her chin, a brave smile on her face. “Ask away. I’m all ears.”
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1000scrubs · 3 years
Text
Round 1: Tonzy
Writer Tonzy’s entry for the initial prompts from 2 years ago
It was sort of brilliant actually... I don’t know if anyone even saw it coming. It was gradual at first. A couple big news articles about how the bees were disappearing, but nothing we hadn’t seen before. But over time it started getting worse. At first everyone was thrilled.  Chemical pesticides were a thing of the past and malaria was at an all time low. But then the grocery shelves started looking just a little sparse. By the end of the year they were practically empty. And it wasn’t just the bees, oh no. Butterflies, silkworms, hell even the stinking flies had started to disappear.
Well by then it was all out panic. All around the globe people were stampeding. Stockpiling food to keep them through the next year, but that only drove the prices up. It only got worse from there. Food became a rare commodity, most of us had to scrape by on processed food bricks and such.  Desperation turned to violence, soon we were on the brink of world war 3.
But that’s exactly where they wanted us. They had the whole world in their hands. While everyone was distracted by the food shortages, they swooped in and took control of the largest food distribution centres that were left. Massive ships descending from the sky.  We were at their mercy.  
It’s been around five years now and almost everyone left has gone underground.  But damn if this apocalypse isn’t good for business. Bodies littering the streets, mortality rates skyrocketing. Someone’s gotta get rid of them all, so the aliens have been  tripling the rations for anyone brave enough to do it. Lucky me, I’ve been an undertaker all my life. It’s dangerous though, above ground is a wasteland filled with the worst dregs of humanity. It’s where we banish the criminals. It’s a lucky thing that I’m the best.
I started running an underground smuggling route from my cemetery. Hidden in the crypts, where no one would think to look. People pay good food to get smuggled back into civilization. Every so often someone would come through spinning wild rumours about a device that could fix our unique alien problem. Bring the bugs back and restore our humanity. Like everyone, at first I assumed it was just wishful hoping. Brought on by our imminent destruction. But the rumours only got louder and stronger. More specific. Something about a mad scientist who found a way to jump through time and space to recover a lost artifact. It sounded like a load of bull except for the very precise science that accompanied it. Not that I particularly knew what any of it meant, but it definitely sounded too good for someone to have just made it up.
That’s when it all changed. Her name was Carrie. She was older, in her 60’s, with a stern face and narrowed eyes. I met her on one of my morning digs through the deserted towns. She must’ve known me by reputation, because she approached with no hesitation. “The Undertaker. You can get me back to Karyon?” Her voice was low and gravelly as the dust swirled around us. “For what price?” I asked hesitantly. Her confidence was unnerving in this hellscape. “I’ll give whatever you want, just name it.” She snapped. “Garlic bread.” It had came out of my mouth immediately. I had been waiting 5 years for that buttery, cheesy bread between my lips. Just the thought of it made my mouth water. “5 loaves.” 1 for every year. I knew I was pushing my luck. I must’ve smuggled thousands of people, but not a single slice of garlic bread had I ever seen. “Done.” My eyes must’ve showed my suspicion. She gave a deep throaty chuckle. “I’m good for it don’t worry. I had a good job with the aliens.”
We waited till nightfall before I led her down the crypts to the small dark tunnel.  I had my back turned to her, no reason to suspect anything. She was half my size, practically no meat on her bones. Then everything went dark. The next thing I remember I was waking up on a cold dark floor with a bright blue light strobing on and off. An acidic taste in the back of my mouth and a pounding headache.
Carrie stood looming over me. My eyes were throbbing beneath my skull and there was a weird pressure there that made my ears stuffy.  I saw her mouth moving but all I could hear was a ringing whine in my head. “WHAT?” I could barely hear anything. She pursed her lips tightly, her eyes flashing in anger. She picked me up and shoved me roughly towards a small bench in the corner of the room. I felt a sharp sting on the side of my neck and suddenly everything went clear. “Shut up. We don’t want any unnecessary attention.” She hissed, “this is our last chance. I will not have some narcissistic undertaker ruin it.” Narcissistic! The nerve! I opened my mouth to retaliate but she quickly cut me off. “Say another word and I’ll kill you myself. Just listen.” She pulled a small pouch out of her jacket. A small silver disk slipped out of and lit up with a quiet whirring noise. Bright light illuminated the room and I had to squint to see what was hovering above it. “This is our last hope. This is the Declaration of Independence.” She must have seen the incredulous look on my face, “ obviously not the real one, it’s just a projection. It’s the key to ending this goddamn horror.” “What are you talking about?  Everyone with a Third grade education knows that’s just an ancient piece of paper.” “No.” She hissed, annoyance flashing through her face, “This is the key to our salvation.”
— 2 months later —
Hot air blasted against my cheek, singing the fine hair. I ducked for cover. Not for the first time, I thought of the warm buttery, cheesy prize awaiting me at the end of this god forsaken mission. “At this rate I deserve a mountain of garlic bread for all this.” “Shut up.” Carrie glared from where she was situated behind the wing of our rocket. “If you could think about anything other than yourself for once...” More gunfire peppered the area. I grabbed my weapon and let loose, several alien figures dropping to the ground with garbled screams. They were segmented like an insect, with bulbous orange heads and black pincers at their mouths. Several more blasts shot out and the last few aliens fell.  “We must be quick” Carrie dusted off her arm and strode off briskly. I exhaled softly, finally able to take a good look around. This place was familiar, yet exceedingly foreign. As if you asked someone to recreate all life on earth from memory. The bubbling sound of running water, the rustling of purple tinged leaves, the crunch of green stones beneath our feet. “This is planet K-4670.” Carrie spoke softly, as if the sound of her voice was an intrusion on this serene world. “The first inhabitable planet discovered outside of our solar system.” “Inhabitable? Don’t you mean inhabited?” I tried to keep the sarcasm out of my voice but based on her severe glower, I hadn’t succeeded. “Of course we didn’t know that.” Her face softened slightly. “This place is rich in valuable resources. We hadn’t seen signs of intelligent life forms.” Her hands fidgeted with the cuff of her sleeves. “We thought we could do something good. Renew our dying planet.” “So you exploited this one instead?” I looked up. The sky looked the same as Earth. Puffy white clouds floated against  vibrant blue. “We didn’t know.” Carrie quickened her pace, her posture stiff. “Bullshit.” I huffed. Ahead of me, Carrie tilted her head slightly, an ugly look on her face. We walked in silence from there, occasionally passing the scars of our discoveries. Looking into one of the deep craters, I saw remnants of a sprawling civilization. Eventually we reached our destination. A giant tower crawling with aliens. We stopped a fair distance away. The place resembled a massive termite mound. Carrie shoved something into my hand. “This will get you back where you need to go.” The object was the size of my palm and smooth to the touch. “What do you mean, what is this?” “Just press the button when I tell you.” Her arms were crossed in front of her. “I haven’t told you this yet, but thank you. You’re a good person.” She pat my arm awkwardly and turned away. “I’ve been called many things in my life ma’am, but good was never one of them.” I stared at her back, once again noticing how small and frail she looked. Without her usual overbearing personality, she was just a little old woman. “We should get this over with.” She turned back to me, an unbearable sadness washed across her face briefly, before she steeled back into her usual sneer. “Let’s go.” We snuck around to the back of the building, carefully avoiding the rounds of guards that walked by. The inside of the tower was dark and cool. The green rock walls were worn smooth. A dim glow permeated the long empty corridors. For all the activity outside, the interior seemed abandoned. We worked our way slowly through the winding paths, until we came to a large high roofed room. It was empty, apart from a tall podium set in the centre. “There it is.” Carrie breathed. She took a step and reached up at the podium. “Stay your hand witch.” A garbled voice emerged from the shadows, accompanied by a metallic whine. Carrie snatched her hand back, a single drop of blood falling to the floor. A hulking beast of an alien emerged from the shadowy corner. It stalked closer, stopping several feet away. Several hair thin needles twirled between its fingers. “You’ve made a mistake coming here.” It’s words sounded strange, unlike any accent I’d heard before. The large black pincers made sharp snapping noises as they opened and closed around its mouth. “You’ve given us no choice.” Carrie clenched her fists at her sides, when she opened them again four white indents were pressed into the pink palm. “I will do what I have to for my people.” The alien made a noise that could loosely be described as a laugh. “We’ve given no choice? We were living peacefully here, we had no quarrel with you. It was your people that destroyed our homes and killed us in droves.” “We didn’t mean to cause such pain, we didn’t know you were here.” I spoke up from beside Carrie. Glancing at the stiff look on her face. Another laugh echoed against the four walls. “Is that she told you runt?” I bristled at the insult, my stature had never been questioned before. “We made contact with your probes. We accepted your surveyors into our homes. We taught you everything you know about our planet. Yet your greed cannot be satiated. You wanted this planet for yourself, so you tried to exterminate us.” The clicking of its mandibles was deafening in the silence. Carrie said nothing. I turned to face her, but she avoided my gaze. “We know we have no future, what you see here is the last of our population. So the last thing we can do, is to take you down with us.” “You would kill millions of innocents for revenge?” I was seething. Angry at this alien for what they had done, angry at Carrie for what she had started, and angry at myself for trusting her. The alien turned to me, it’s small pale eyes seemed to look straight through me. “Innocents? Do you mourn the millions of us who were buried in these craters?” Its voice was rising in anger. “Enough! There are no innocents. Your people never questioned where your wealth was coming from. Your people didn’t want to know that there comfortable lives were paid in blood!” All three of us moved in the same moment. Carrie reached up and grabbed the wrinkled paper on top of the podium. The alien extended its long arm and shot out a handful of paper thin needles. I pulled out my weapon and shot straight at its chest. Time seemed to slow down. The alien crumpled to the floor as I caught Carrie’s falling body. “Take it, press the button.” Carrie desperately shoved the paper into my hand, her body convulsing as she took gasping breaths. “I’m not just going to leave you here.” I stared at the vibrant blood red stains steeping into the aged yellow paper. Her wrinkled face seemed to sink into itself, her eyes bulging. “This is what I deserve. You must get this back. Give it to my daughter. We must save Earth. My life is insignificant.”  She spoke in a strained staccato. She fished into my pocket and pulled the palm sized item out. She clicked something into place and pushed it into my hand. “Get out of here, you don’t have much time.” I lowered her body to the ground and stepped back. A hint of a smile was on her face.  She closed her eyes and a sigh escaped her dying body “I’m sorry.” The sound of feet echoed down the hall. Shadows were rushing forward to the room. I pressed the button and everything disappeared.
White light pierced my eyes. Loud ringing enveloped my brain. Yellow paper stained with blood was clenched in my fist. A stern face. Brown hair.  Sharp eyes. “Give it to me.” A voice. My head throbbed. Fingers grabbed at my clenched hand and forced them open. The woman took the paper and cut it open straight through the centre. A thin blue glowing string was pulled out. “She sewed this into the Declaration of Independence, she knew we would need it.” The woman placed the string on a round tablet, scanning it. A diagram appeared on the screen. It looked like a weapon. “Here, you must be hungry.” She handed my a warm plate. A long forgotten aroma wafted against my face. I couldn’t believe it. A plate stacked high with freshly baked garlic bread. I didn’t hesitate. Handfuls of warm cheesy bread were shoved into my mouth. I could barely register the taste with how fast I was swallowing. Eventually the last slice sat on the plate. This time I ate it slowly, savouring every bite. My face covered in crumbs, I finally asked.  “What are you going to do with it?” “I will finish what my mother started.” She turned to me with that severe overbearing look. I saw a flash of silver before blood spurt from my throat. It ran down my throat as I choked, struggling to take a breath. I fell to my knees, one hand grasping at my gauged neck. I looked up at her in a panic, only to be met with an apathetic stare. “Thank you for your service”. My body collapsed. Red blood pooling on the floor, the last bite of garlic bread stained red as my body began to die. At least I got paid.
Who: narcissistic undertaker obsessed with garlic bread What: steals the Declaration of Independence When: The ‘When’ prompt was lost Where: the first inhabitable planet discovered outside the solar system Why: because all the insects disappeared
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sdghgffh · 3 years
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The Funeral Service
The Funeral Service will be held at ST. Well, what shall I do now? What’s that? Herbs nike air max 102 essential white . Only I looked round and saw that grandfather was following me quickly, and then ran to overtake me, and began calling out to me, ‘Nellie, Nellie!’ And Azorka was running after me. But later, he tries to rein in Tom, telling him not to harm Vargas. Rea (her Clytemnestra is one of the best parts of the Iphigenia segment), Rebecca Ridenour, Beth Thompson (as a sort of doomed Kevin Bacon), and Nikki Weaver (as a girl without hands).. That night, the happy Hatch clan celebrated at the 800 Degrees pizza parlor in Fort Wayne with "30 to 40" friends and family. The wolfswood, the northmen named the forest. Tyrion was not entirely sure he had been japing... She has also appeared in stage productions of "The Sound of Music" (Maria), "Little Women" (Jo) and in UNLV's production of "Annie Get Your Gun" (Winnie Tate).. 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Douglas starred duci alkalmi ruha in one of the most memorable episodes of Rod Serling's "The Twilight Zone" titled "Eye of the Beholder," it was the one in which her head is wrapped in bandages for most of the half hour after plastic surgery aimed at fixing her "ugliness," which in fact was beauty in a universe of monsters. But I noticed a great change in Natasha; there was not a trace now of her old frankness with me; in fact, she seemed to have become actually mistrustful of me. While some of the pieces boasted oddly functional elements, such as backpack type straps inside a jacket that was then sent down the runway zattini promoção de botas as a cape like topper, the playful use of shapes, classic colours such as navy, white, red and olive and even a bit of shine all said to be inspired by the 2016 Olympics in Rio made for an eye catching collection that is sure to garner the brand bokacsizma bakancs more than a few new fans. 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The sporty style would feel comfortable at a gala event wearing long, flowing pants, and simple top and low (but elegant) shoes. Reuben L. The notion had not been raised in public council discussions during which the council approved the ordinance in concept and it was not noted in the staff report accompanying the ordinance.. Then consider a supportive insole. You always left a little room to "grow into," down at the toe, but if you outgrew the growing space, well, you just had to hang on until barefoot weather, because you weren't getting another pair of shoes. Children 12 and under should be in costume and must be accompanied by a parent or adult to participate. Assuming it reliably delivers 5 mpg more than the Hemi, the EcoDiesel burns 160.4 adidas mariposas fewer gallons of fuel annually based on 12,000 miles of travel, saving $495.64 annually. Tropicoso, Greater Cincinnati's premier Latin band, will perform at the park's BEHRINGER CRAWFORD MUSEUM as part of its summer COFFEE CUP CONCERT SERIES. At its hottest, it can reach temperatures of up to 460 C on a regular basis. That was just another silly dream, though. The law views them as capable of committing crimes. Massey’s own ancestral holdings, far to the south, were lost to him, so he must needs make an advantageous marriage or resign himself to being no more than a knight of the king’s household. He might prefer to cut the castle off from the outside world and starve out its defenders. Morning at last dawned, and, according to orders received the air jordan aj4 day before, they prepared themselves to go, and even put on their bonnets and shawls, and stood ready for the word to be given. And yet in fekete táska női our own homes it's this dinky room, where we just take off our shoes and hang our coats and hats."Bryson discovered that the discrepancy could be traced back to the Middle Ages. Passengers are allowed to buy beverages or liquids or gels of any size, once they have passed the airport security area and are in the terminal. By late afternoon the snow was falling steadily, but the river of wildlings had dwindled to a stream. She must have had some rat in her, now that I think of it. Now he found himself wondering whether they had felt as lost and confused as he did.. My enemies have told you I am dead. 15. Everything takes place in the connecting rooms of a hotel that the best that Cleveland has to offer. “Would that we were ravens,” Justin Massey said on the fourth day of the march, the day the snow began to fall. I mean its not like anyone reads this stupid thing anyways except Shaina. It's more about high waist, straight leg or wide leg, plus culottes and gaucho pants.
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goose-books · 4 years
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darklingverse & magic
as promised! a look at the magical system in my speculative fiction loose-retelling-of-king-lear WIP, which you can find out more about here and here! this is a terribly, terribly long post, so i’m sticking most of it under a cut, but i can guarantee there are at least a few fun diagrams in there. (all character images used are from this picrew by cinnasmores!)
shoutout to waya @harehearts​ for helping me work out some of the kinks in this by asking incredibly helpful questions... waya i will untag you if you want i just wanted to appreciate your contribution. also going to tag @suits-of-woe​ because you mentioned wanting to see this!
Jasper’s dad talks about it like oil. Petroleum has to be refined before you can put it in your car. Unrefined, it’ll just as soon kill you as anything else. The natural clock ticks. A mage hits twelve, or thirteen, or fourteen. And then it’s roaring under their skin, like an electric volt, like a fever, burning in them, fighting tooth and nail to get out.
It always gets out. You pick the route. Or you don’t.
The first thing Vee ever learned was duplication. Small objects only. Jasper was crawling through stacks of post-it notes for weeks. It was like an illness: Vee would get too itchy, his magic nipping at his neck, and he’d clench his fists and then they’d have another goddamn stack of stickies. “He has to get it out somehow,” Dad had admonished Jasper, when he’d complained. “Otherwise it’ll hurt him. I do it, too. The difference is I’m useful.” And he had demonstrated by snapping his fingers and cleaning all the house’s dishes at once.
Jasper is loath to give his father props for anything. But he was, on that particular occasion, right. Within a year Vee could flick his hands and shut windows, heat leftovers, unlock doors, send laundry skittering across the floor into the hamper.
It makes sense; Vee’s an infuriatingly quick study, magically and academically. And he inherited their dad’s style of magic. Easygoing. Quiet. Unobtrusive. Less explosive, more creative. Nowadays the worst that happens when he gets hot under the collar is that he spawns another houseplant and Jasper has to brush the leaves off the kitchen table.
Because Vee followed Dad’s instructions. He annotated all of his textbooks. He mastered it early, by seventeen, because of-fucking-course he did, but he was already in control by fifteen. Everyone learns to control their magic eventually.
Most people do eventually.
— darkling, segment iv: control
okay so let’s get into this!!!
isn’t darkling a modern king lear retelling? what do you mean, “the magic system?”
great question! darkling is, in fact, a modern king lear retelling (well, very loosely; it’s my city now and i reserve the right to do what i want). it takes place entirely in and around a city called dovermorry, an extremely isolated place secluded in the mountains, surrounded by wilderness for hundreds of miles, and only reachable via a single train through the mountains. dovermorry is loosely in the american northwest, sort of, i guess. by which i mean that’s kind of where i’m picturing it, but also it’s incredibly vague and honestly i don’t really know. dovermorry is, like, you know… [gesturing] it’s around. [kicking any kind of definable map under the rug]
the plot is set in the modern day with modern technology. the magic that exists is woven into daily life alongside said modern technology, which is the primary reason i’m calling darkling speculative fiction. most people in darklingverse aren’t actually heavily affected by magic (for reasons i’ll get into but which basically boil down to “they don’t have much”); however, dovermorry as a city is mostly known for being The Place Where Mages Go. most of the families in the city have been there for a long time; they’re old money families with powerful magic who use their inheritances to study increasingly esoteric forms of magic that aren’t very helpful in praxis. this is because dovermorry is home to the large and powerful Mage’s Guild, which is in charge of setting the laws around what kind of magic can be practiced in the city and by who. if you want to study magic at a scholarly level, you’d better pay your dues to the guild, otherwise you’re gonna get the boot.
every large city has a guild, but dovermorry’s in specific is Really Big and, unusually, has more political power than the actual mayor / government of the city. partially because leovald stayer, the guild’s president, is just… ughghhebwfbefbdsbfbdsfsd. That Way. in dovermorry if you’re not getting the boot you’re licking it
“wait, slow down. what is a mage anyway?”
well, technically, anyone! everyone in darklingverse has at least a little bit of natural magic (though it might be very little) that develops during puberty/adolescence! so by its literal definition, A Person Who Does Magic, everyone is a mage. that said, in colloquial terms, the word mage has taken on a connotation that basically means… exactly the kind of people who live in dovermorry. like i just said: scholarly, probably rich, probably a little elitist. so your average working-class person is TECHNICALLY a mage, but if you asked they’d say something like, “oh, mages are those hoity-toity folks who join guilds and stuff, WE’RE just regular folks over here.”
“you keep saying magic. what are you talking about. magic is a word that means so many things”
don’t worry, in darkling it just means [gestures vaguely]. re: everyone has magic, it develops in puberty, and there aren’t really specifications - it isn’t like some folks get fire magic and others get shapeshifting magic or etc. it’s more like everyone has a certain amount of raw energy inside them that can be drawn out and funneled into different tasks/spells. some ground rules:
1. you can’t change the amount of magic you have. your magic develops naturally, and maybe you get a lot of raw energy, or maybe you only get a little, but that’s what you’re stuck with and no amount of practicing is gonna give you more.
2. that said, magic is hard to control when it first develops - and practicing WILL help you get better at controlling it. so while you’ll always have the same base amount, you’ll get faster and more efficient about concentrating it into tasks.
3. re: amount of raw energy: that shit isn’t limitless. whether you have a lot or a little, it will eventually run out and you’ll have to wait for your juice to recharge. like a battery. you are a battery. how long this recharge period takes depends on how much magic you have, how fast you used it all up (if you push your limits to do something Really Big, you’re gonna be wiped), and also just how you’re doing physically in general? if you use up all of your magic in one go and you haven’t slept in a while, you might want to, like, sit down. drink a juice box. take a nap
4. while magic isn’t limitless, you can’t just NOT use it, either. when you aren’t using your magic, that raw magical energy builds up in you. and builds up. and builds up. and it does not particularly want to be in you. it wants to be out in the world, actually, and by god your fragile human meatsack is not going to stop it. so if you don’t choose a task to funnel your magical energy into (eg, i use my built-up energy to send my socks scuttling across the floor of their own accord to get into the laundry basket), that energy will eventually decide to just come out on its own. more on this later.
5. like i said, the mage’s guild of any particular city sets the rules, but there’s generally one core rule and that’s “don’t do necromancy.” like, obviously you’re not allowed to kill someone magically, but you’re also not allowed to kill someone NONMAGICALLY, so that’s kind of a given? but necromancy is something only a few very powerful mages can do and it is a BIG no-no. don’t fuck around with death, man. people don’t come back right, but also, just, like, let them rest, all right? let the dead rest.
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[image description: the “society if X” meme, showing a futuristic “ideal” society full of green landscapes, smooth silver buildings, and flying cars. the text on the top reads “society if no one did necromancy.” the text on the bottom reads “this post made by the official mage’s guild don’t do necromancy you freaks bottom text.” in the corner you can see the imgflip.com watermark that i could have erased were i less lazy.]
“so what CAN you do with magic?”
the average joe? not much. again, there aren’t specific categories of magic; there aren’t any ATLA-style bending divisions. if you and i have the same raw amount of energy, there’s no reason we can’t both learn the same spells.
that said, the average person doesn’t have a lot of magic! it is much less dramatic than i’ve made it sound. there are not big magical firefights happening marvel-movie-style on every city street. if you want to talk to your friend, you use your iphone, not some kind of distance-speaking spell (which would be hard to maintain anyway and oh my god the phone lines are right there). the average person, on a daily basis, will use their small amounts of magic to heat their coffee up, or to wipe up a mess or spill, or to clean their floor re: the socks i mentioned earlier. (while writing this post, i had to begrudgingly admit that the socks were not going to scuttle anywhere, and i was forced to pick them up with my hands, manually. tragic, i know.)
again. dovermorry is the exception to this rule. most of the people in dovermorry have a little too much money and a little too much magic and not nearly enough chill. but dovermorry has also been festering like a petri dish alone up in the mountains for decades so what can you do.
“hold on, are you telling me that people in darklingverse didn’t immediately start wielding innate magic quantities as a tool of classism? sounds fake”
regretfully i cannot retcon classism out of darklingverse as it is relevant to the plot. this is because the plot is “Incredible: This Rich White Guy Has Never Been Told No And Doesn’t Know How To Handle It Without Crytyping!”
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[image description: a picrew of leovald stayer, a pale-skinned man with short blond hair and an angry-looking frown, plus tears that i drew onto him with the paint tool in paint.net. beside his head is red crytyping text reading “ii’mm sso; so..rryy i didn’t[ mme  a nit wwhy . are yu,,o suiiicdee .bai,,it,ing MMe gr;;acen im yuour da[d,,,”]
the general implicit belief across the country, but especially in highly stratified cities like dovermorry, is that upper-class people from distinguished noble families are just naturally born with more magic, and lower-class people are born with progressively less as we trip down the social ladder. is this kind of true, demographically? yeah but everyone’s got their cause-and-effect turned around. class doesn’t dictate natural magic so much as natural magic dictates class. the people on top like to be on top. and having jacked-up magic is a nice way to stay on top. so rip to the rich kids born with piddly little amounts of raw magic, because your family probably is not going to help you get places. and rip to everyone else born with piddly little amounts of magic, too, because unless you’re REALLY good at something nonmagical, you probably are not going to Strike It Big because those in power are gonna keep you down. and if you DO make it to the top you’ll be viewed as an exception that proves the rule.
there is some magic that is genuinely naturally harder to work with. the upper classes are personally really invested in making sure that kind of magic is painted as rough and lower-class. this is because it is threatening to them! and they do not want to be threatened. unless, of course, it’s them with the hard-to-handle magic. and then they’re fine with it.
“but didn’t you say everyone’s magic is basically the same?”
everyone’s magic can be wielded to do basically the same things. you can’t control how much flows through you. you CAN control where/how it gets out. and everyone’s pathways for how to let it out are basically the same (see the examples i mentioned above!). but some magic is a lot easier to control than other magic.
you can’t just not use magic, because if you don’t use it, it will use itself. it will Do Shit On Its Own. and that’s where this gets sticky.
so let’s get into that.
active vs. passive magic
now with fun diagrams!
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[image description: a rainbow spectrum stretching from blue to red. the leftmost end (blue) is labeled “’passive’ magic” and “way down here you can mostly do fun party tricks.” the rightmost end (red) is labeled “’active’ magic” and “way down here you’re officially a ‘witch’ lol.”]
when i say active vs. passive magic, i should specify that this is not a strict binary! i’m about to use the terms in a sort of binary way to simplify this post down, but magic exists on a spectrum.* generally the less raw magic energy you have, the more “passive” your magic will be, but that’s not a hard and fast rule! characters vee and rory, for example, both have comparatively passive magic; however, rory’s is smaller and generally good for party tricks, illusions, and sleight of hand, while vee has more magic that he finds is really good for things like Growing Plants Really Fast and Making The Plants Do What You Want.
*i know this looks like some kind of metaphor for gender but i swear it’s not. you can trans your gender no matter WHAT your magic looks like i promise <3
i mentioned that if it builds up for too long unused, magic will Do Shit On Its Own. with passive magic, the Shit It Does is, like, accidentally growing a plant where plants shouldn’t grow, or changing your hair color when you aren’t looking. slow seeping magic that just kind of oozes out of you until you notice, “wait, shit, my hair didn’t used to be blue.” with active magic, if you don’t control it, it will Break Shit and it will not be nice about it.
active magic is - if we simplify both the magic binary and human genetics until they’re really really blurry - the dominant trait. if you made a middle school biology punnet square, active magic would be the dominant allele and passive the recessive allele. (i haven’t taken a bio class in two years no one get my ass for this analogy.) the child’s magic will take after whichever parent has more active magic. so, to illustrate that, let’s look at a normal family with a normal non-scandalous family tree. by which of course i mean the greenwoods. [canned laugh track playing in the studio]
here are ara, griffin, and medea (parents) charted by how active their magic is:
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[image description: the same spectrum, now featuring three picrews of characters. ara, a dark-skinned woman with wavy black hair, freckles, and glasses, is placed leftmost, closest to the blue/passive end. griffin, a dark-skinned man with short black hair and glasses, is placed near the middle of the spectrum, slightly to the left. medea, a pale-skinned woman with spiky white hair, freckles, and gold hoop earrings, is placed rightmost, at the very edge of the red/active end.]
...and here’s how that went for them, progeny-wise:
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[image description: a little family tree. ara and griffin’s child, vee, a dark-skinned person with wavy black hair, a worried look, and band-aids on his face, is labeled “quiet unobtrusive plant-based magic” in green text. medea and griffin’s child, jasper, a lighter-skinned person with spiky brown hair and freckles, is labeled “once accidentally shattered 50 champagne glasses at his dad’s birthday party” in red text.]
(yes, i know i said there aren’t any ATLA-esque magical divisions; that’s still true; vee just happens to get on really, really well with plants. much like jasper gets on really really well with entropy and causing problems on purpose.)
so the thing about “active” magic is that it’s usually more powerful, but if it’s too powerful it gets incredibly destructive. like i said earlier - if you’re part of the upper class, it shakes out fine; otherwise not so much. your choices with this kind of dangerous magic are to either fight it and keep it tamped down, or to lean completely into it and embrace your massive amounts of dangerous power. if you are rich, you can do that second thing! that’s what leovald stayer does, and he’s the president of the mage’s guild! good for him! [i say, through gritted teeth.] but if you aren’t rich, you had better try to keep that shit on lockdown, unless you want to be branded a reckless uncultured social deviant and - in most cases - a witch.
mages vs. witches
everyone with magic is a mage. only a few mages are witches. it’s like squares and rectangles, you know? you can hear gracen talk about that here in nice prose (plus baby cressida!), but the bottom line is that “witch” is shorthand for “woman* who has magic so powerful it’s unsafe, who uses it to break shit and be reckless,” and anyone with the “wrong” type of magic who doesn’t have a trust fund to back them up is getting tarred with that brush. they’re nothing like those elegant learned mages casting down benevolent laws from their ivory towers, you see.
*this isn’t a gender specific thing but usually women are the ones who get called witches because Women Should Know How To Control Themselves But Men Are Just Like That. god we love misogyny <3
tl;dr: misogyny and classism real. if you have hard-to-control magic that breaks shit then you’re destined to be a pariah UNLESS of course you’re rich and powerful and then it’s COOL that if you got too out-of-control you could collapse a building or cause a monumental storm or something. you know. cool.
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[image description: the same magic spectrum. medea is still there, placed exactly where she was before. leovald’s face is also there, right above hers; in terms of magic, they are equally placed on the spectrum. leovald is labeled “runs the whole city” and medea is labeled “lives in a cave in the woods,” both in white text. there are three thinking emojis at the very top of the image.]
funny how these things work out.
in conclusion
in conclusion, if you’ve read all of this, you’re braver than the marines and have my undying love. if you’re down here for a tl;dr: magic is a natural force everyone is born with; some magic is comparatively harder to control; classism & other social structures affect the way a person’s magic is viewed (there are a lot of double standards); i really enjoy making little oc diagrams.
if you have questions, comments, etc, about this post or darkling in general, my ask box is always open! thank you for reading! [blowing you a kiss]
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yourdeepestfathoms · 4 years
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in aeternum, little lamb
(Read Anne as Courtney!Anne)
Word count: 4756
Prompt: “Look, I know we don’t know each other that well, but I’m still worried about you. No one deserves to be alone.”
———————
It was raining. Again.
Usually a rainstorm was serene and peaceful, normal for London, but there was a certain sticky humidity in the air that made going outside a chore. It was cold, yet uncomfortably warm at the same time with no wind blowing to ease the mild heat that has settled its oppressive, sultry murk over the city. It spilled into every street, every alleyway, every house that dared to open the window, thinking that it would help with the clamminess that fogged their home, but to no avail.
This, of course, brought upon complete and utter dreariness that coated every person making their rounds through their daily lives.
Anne’s forehead was dotted with beads of sweat by the time she arrived at the theater, only then really regretting her decision to walk to work. She hadn’t been expecting the humidity to be that bad, but here she was, feeling like she was leaking steam from every pore.
“God, this weather is miserable,” Jane was grumbling in her dressing room when Anne peeked in. She was currently attempting to tame her wild blonde hair (and losing the battle), which had a small (read as: large, high, anything but small) tendency to frizz up in high vaporous atmospheres like the one drenching London on that day.
“You look great, Jane.” Anne laughed, leaning on the doorframe. She gets a piercing grey glower shot in her direction, but isn’t phased by it. The coldness of the stare almost eased her internal temperature.
“Why is it so damn humid?” Jane finally exclaimed. “We live in London! Not Florida or whatever the fuck it’s called—”
Anne bit both lips, trying to hold back her laughter at the proper fit the queen before her was throwing.
“It’s supposed to be rainy and cold. Not rainy and a LITERAL SAUNA!”
Kitty, who was sitting nearby at her own makeup table, giggled softly. She got up and picked up a brush to help with her mother’s wild hair, which was definitely puffing up as if she were an angry cat or a distressed Studio Ghibli character.
“I don’t know, Jane,” Anne laughed slightly. “Well, I’m going to go get a cup of coffee. You two need anything?”
“Yeah,” Jane said. “A word with Mother Nature.”
Anne laughed again, waved a hand, and walked off to the break room.
Well- it wasn’t really a break room, per se. Theaters didn’t really have those. It was just an extra dressing room that nobody used and had a microwave, mini fridge, and coffee machine inside. In some way or another, a round bar table, small couch, and two beanbags ended up inside- Anne couldn’t really remember how they got there, but they were there and, thus, the room became a nice place to chat and relax when nothing was going on. Kitty had once even hid under the twin beanbags during a game of hide-and-seek (which was also her idea).
Upon stepping inside the break room, the scent of coffee bombarded Anne’s nose. The coffee machine was still on, but little was left in the pot. She walks over to it, thinking it was enough to sate her- she didn’t really like coffee, but she needed the extra rush to help her combat the dreariness the weather was inflicting upon her.
“Sorry,” A voice from behind suddenly said. “If I had known you wanted some, I would have made more.”
Anne actually jumped and she whirled around to see none other than the music director sitting in one of the beanbags. She jumped, too, and straightened up, nearly spilling the mug she had placed beside her pillowy seat.
“Sorry!” She said again. “I didn’t mean to startle you.”
Anne placed a hand over her racing heart and waved the other dismissively, laughing.
“It’s alright!” She assured the girl. “I didn’t see you at all!”
Joan smiled slightly, humoring her comment, then slumped back over to continue reading the book she had in her lap.
Anne studies her for a moment- as everyone said, Joan wasn’t much for conversation, despite always lurking on the edges of a group discussion. It was like she wanted to join in or just talk to someone, but didn’t have the courage to do so. Perhaps she was worried about being ignored or rejected, so, instead, she just watched in silence.
Maybe that’s why a few younger stagehands who were working there for college credit started calling her the “Theater Ghost.” Anne couldn’t really deny that that title wasn’t accurate- her not noticing the girl at all just proved that it was.
“Did you drink all of this?” She asked, trying to strike up a conversation to make things less awkward. Tenseness was as thick as the humidity outside in that room.
“It’s not that big of a pot...” Joan sort of mumbled.
So, yes. She did.
Anne frowned slightly. She vaguely knew of Joan’s caffeine addiction, but never really saw it first hand. She just knew that the girl drank more coffee than everyone working on the show combined.
“I see,” Anne chuckled. “Well, alright.”
She turned around while waiting for the pot to fill to see that Joan was looking at her. However, when she noticed, Joan snapped her head back down to her book. Anne furrowed her eyebrows.
“What are you reading?”
“Huh?” Joan seemed...surprised that Anne was asking her something. “Oh, it’s just- it’s just some silly book.” She kicked her leg anxiously against the beanbag, seemingly trying to hype herself up for something. “It’s, umm- it’s called Wings of Fire.”
She brandishes the book, keeping one finger inside the pages to mark her spot. On the cover was a flying gold and black dragon with four insect wings, spines along the back, and funny little glasses on the snout (something about dragons having eyesight care and possibly dragon eye doctors stood out as silly to Anne).
“It looks good,” Anne said after inspecting the picture.
“Oh, it is!” Joan said, perking up slightly. “It’s about these ten dragon tribes and five baby dragons were supposed to be born on The Brightest Night and be the Dragonets of Destiny to stop the war between three Sandwings fighting to be queen. So they’re kept underground, but their caretakers are kinda abusive and mean. Probably because the Skywing egg was destroyed so they had to replace it with a Rainwing egg, which are supposed to be the laziest tribe and that makes Kestrel- the really mean guardian- mad. So she’s kinda a jerk to the five dragonets. But then they break out of their cave before they’re supposed to leave when they’re six, because they have to wait until they’re seven, only to be captured by the Skywing queen! And they’re forced to fight to the death and they’re almost killed because this one character, Peril, can burn everything she touches! But then it’s revealed that Clay, he’s the Mudwing, has fireproof scales! And Glory, she’s the Rainwing I was talking about, can spit venom!! Then they escape and go to the Seawing kingdom and Tsunami- the Seawing- is actually the missing Seawing princess and a statue was killing all the other eggs. Then they go to the rainforest and Glory becomes queen and Starflight goes blind in the fourth book and the end of the war happens in the fifth!!” She’s babbling about a hundred miles per minute- Anne can barely keep up. “We should- we should read it together! If you’re interested. Like a book club! Except I’m on the twelfth book right now and I don’t know how fast you can read and I just basically spoiled the entire series, hahaha...but only for the first five!! But the next arc isn’t that good if you ask me. It completely throws everything that has happened out the window and just puts new characters in a school? Which they barely even stay at! So why even make the school, Tui? And my favorite character in that segment is in a coma for, like, three of the five books in that arc!! Arc three is pretty cool, though. I like the new tribes. And Sundew is supposed to be a lesbian! With an actual girlfriend! And it’s a main plot point!!” She’s beaming now. “I just—I think you would really, really like it and, I dunno...it would be fun! I can read it aloud? N-not because I think you can’t read or anything, I just—like talking. To someone. And to make sure you don’t doze off and miss any of the really good parts! Because there are SO MANY even though Tui doesn’t seem to remember any of her world building half of the time, but—”
“Joan?”
“Yeah?”
“Breathe.”
Joan’s face flashed deep crimson. She hunched her shoulders around her neck and ducked her head, almost using her book as a shield to hide herself. It seems she just realized that she had been talking the green queen’s ear off.
“Sorry,” She whispered. “I-I just thought that you wanted to...” She shook her head. Her hands clench around the sides of her book. “Nevermind.”
“Joan-”
“Your coffee is gonna get cold.”
Anne looked at the full coffee pot, then back to the girl, and then walked over to get herself a cup. She can hear Joan shifting anxiously in the beanbag behind her.
Honestly, she found the girl’s deep interest in what she was reading quite endearing, she just didn’t know how to reply to her monologue in a way that showed that she actually was interested in what she was saying.
“Maybe send me the link to the book sometime?” Anne offered while heading for the door. “Or if you have a physical copy...”
“Yeah,” Joan smiles thinly- weakly. “I have some at home. I’ll give them to you tomorrow.”
“Sounds great.”
“Oh, and— Anne?”
Anne stopped right as she was walking out.
“Yeah?”
“Thank you.”
“What for?”
Joan looked down shyly, shifting her legs.
“For talking to me.”
———
“She thanked me. For standing there while she was ranting about a book!”
The other queens looked rather amused by the story they were given during dinner. It wasn’t exactly the reactions Anne was hoping for- was nobody else concerned by the oddity of the situation?!
“Joan’s a...quirky kid.” Jane merely said. “She’s always been a little strange, Anne. I’m almost positive she was raised by literal street rats, so that might have something to do with it. Rats aren’t exactly much for conversation.”
Anne looked at her in shock. Of everyone to say such a thing, she hadn’t expected it to come from Jane “Protective and Loving Mom Friend” Seymour.
“Did you just—”
“Anne,” Jane sighed. “You know what I’m talking about. She worked for you! She’s just a weird kid. Kids are weird!”
“‘Weird’ is when a kid likes to watch snails go over salt and get burned, Jane. Thanking someone for listening to them talk about a book is concerning.” Anne argued.
“Cathy does it all the time.”
“Cathy doesn’t thank us!”
Anne was really getting worked up over this and she wasn’t exactly sure why. She really only got this way for Kitty or Maggie- she theorized it was those maternal instincts kicking in or just a natural protectiveness for an ex-maid in waiting.
Whatever it was, it sure seemed to be amusing to the others.
“Okay, calm down, Anne.” Cleves said, laughing slightly. “We get it, you think it’s worrying. No need to start a food fight over it.”
“I’m not going to-” Anne broke off into agitated grumbling, which caused even more giggles in reaction.
“I said thank you to Catherine when I read to her yesterday,” Cathy said.
“That’s because you were asking her opinion on a chapter you wrote!” Anne struck back. “It is NOT the same thing!”
Cathy shrugged and took a bite out of her pork chop.
“It’s nothing you should stress about, Annie.” Kitty said. “Maybe some people are just meant to be alone!”
Anne gave her a look of disbelief.
“Like Henry.” Cleves put in helpfully.
“Like Henry, yeah!”
Now, don’t get Anne wrong, she loved her little found family with the queens very much, but, at that moment, she wanted to hit all of them with the salad bowl at the center of the table as hard as she could.
Maybe not Aragon, though (unfortunately). The woman hadn’t told Anne to forget about the situation or just move on- she was thoughtfully silent, eating her dinner in reserved peace. Whatever her opinion on the argument was, she didn’t say it.
Anne sighed, putting her head in one hand as she picked at her dinner until Aragon finally spoke up to tell her to get her elbow off the table. She begrudgingly obeys.
Like that, the conversation is dropped and something new, something Anne really didn’t care about was talked about.
After dinner, Anne decided to do some snooping on her laptop. First, she looked up historical information on Joan, only to find nothing. Every website was just the same thing over and over again- literally. It was just copied and pasted from the extremely short and vague Wikipedia page on the girl. The names of her parents weren’t even recorded, nor was any childhood information. There was barely even anything on her time as a lady in waiting, which only covered her work under Jane and not either of the cousins.
She had a son named Hercules, though. If that meant anything.
Next, Anne went to Joan’s Instagram page. It had several hundred followers, mainly from the fans who insisted on following everyone associated with the show, and was filled with the normal posts the actors usually had- although there were very few compared to the queen’s and other ladies in waiting’s accounts. Most of the photos were of her work or her playing the songs on her piano or of selfies of her in the band costume.
In almost all of them, she was completely alone.
Anne searched for something- she didn’t know what exactly, just something- in the seventh-five posts on the account, then went to the photos Joan was tagged in. There weren’t many- just group photos and a few good shots of her from a MegaSix and a single appreciation post (she vaguely remembered Joan telling them about it and how giddy it had made her...nobody had really listened to the babbling at the time).
And then Anne found a certain photo- the first one she was ever tagged in: it was a photo of her costume laid out on a table with the caption, “Here’s the lady in waiting costume! I’ll be posting about SIX more on my other account, so follow if you’re interested!”
The name of the account was @force-be-with-ewe.
Anne clicked on it.
force-be-with-ewe
i just really like drawing sheep
Johanna-She/her-Asexual lesbian-Musician and artist
That’s the first thing Anne saw when she clicked on the account, along with an adorable profile picture of a sheep playing a piano, then the whopping twelve followers (most of which were ghosts or bots) and three hundred and nine posts.
It took Anne just a moment to realize that this was Joan’s personal account.
And she went through all of it.
The profile was a mishmash of drawings and piano videos and sheep. The latest post was actually a photo of a bird with a caption talking about how the little guy had been visiting Joan’s bedroom window every morning and “giving her a reason to get up because she had someone looking forward to seeing her.” She maturely and proudly dubbed the bird “Minecraft.”
After that were drawings of dragons with #wingsoffire and #wof in the descriptions, leading Anne to believe that they were characters from the book she had been told about earlier that day.
And they just kept going.
Among videos of Joan playing the theater keyboard when presumably nobody was around, were drawings of sheep playing various instruments and sleeping and being adorable, drawings of more dragons, drawings of a few Pokémon (mainly Snom, Wooloo, and Sobble). There were stunning drawings of giant creatures from a game called “Subnautica” and beautiful drawings of castles and scenery. There were even drawings of the queens!
Usually fans would tag them in art, but it appeared that Joan was too shy to do that. So, instead, she just left them floating in her profile with no ways to see the masterpieces, since there weren’t any hashtags on those.
Anne was genuinely amazed by the attention to detail in the sketches of her and her fellow queens and even more amazed by the drawings with watercolors. She swore the painting’s eyes had more color than her own and the costume was as vibrant as the actual one in real life.
It was beautiful. They were all beautiful.
Why didn’t Joan want anyone seeing these?
Anne kept scrolling and eventually came upon rather...concerning posts.
The first was of a messy, but haunting colored pencil sketch of a pitch black ram with inky, bleeding red eyes that seemed to stare through the screen and directly into Anne’s soul. The caption simply said, “Black Philip.”
Another was a drawing of a blonde girl, presumably Joan, leaking coffee from every single orifice on her face and was drawn with such detail that it would easily make an emetophobic’s stoamch churn with nausea.
And then there were a few of an ice dragon, slightly similar to one of the dragon tribes from the book, but this one notably had more icicle spikes, frayed scales, and jagged wings. It was moon silver in color with ice blue hues and eyes like a raging blizzard.
All the drawings done with this beast, which was apparently named “Killer Frost” (and has no ties to the Flash character of the same name), were normal- just it laying around, flying, standing atop icebergs menacingly or breathing a freezing death breath. But there were a few that stood out to Anne as worrying.
The first was of Kitty, actually. She was wearing her show costume and her eyes were closed with a peaceful expression on her face. And then there was the glittering paw of the ice dragon reaching down from the top of the image and cupping one of her cheeks with its serrated, barbed claws. The caption read, “The Chosen One.”
The second and much more concerning drawing was captioned, “Envy truly is a deadly sin.”
It was a drawing of Killer Frost crouched in a feral position, staring forward with blazing eyes, jaw hanging open and teeth bared, absolutely soaked in blood.
There was just blood everywhere. Blood on the body, blood on the claws, blood dripping in horrifying realistic threads from the mouth, blood all over the blank, white floor beneath the beast, blood squirting from the remains of the carcasses that had presumably been gored.
The image left Anne with so many questions- What did this represent? Who were those corpses? Was Joan jealous? And if yes, who was she jealous of?
One thing was certain, though- Joan was startlingly good at drawing gore. A sketch of Killer Frost holding its own gooey, bloody esophagus and larynx in another photo just proved that. There was even one of the dragon ripping its own throat out while the faint outline of what appeared to be three ghosts encouraged it.
It was strange to see such mishmashes of horror shoved in between adorable sketches of sleeping baby lambs and fluffy Wooloos. It also left Anne with growing worry for the artist.
When she finally finished going through the profile, Anne decided the follow the account and became the thirteenth follower.
This time, thirteen would not be an unlucky number.
———
Five books were left on Anne’s dressing room table the next day, all with a colorful dragon on the cover, and a note that read, “I didn’t know if you only wanted one book or all of them, so I just left the first arc. Let me know what you think! :) -Joan”
“Fan mail?” Cleves asked, peeking over to the table from where she was getting ready.
“Nah,” Anne replied. “Just some books.”
“Sounds very cool,” Cleves chuckled before returning to dousing her hair with hairspray.
“Extremely.” Anne said, then set out to find and talk to Joan before the show. She could get her hair and makeup done later!
Except she couldn’t find the girl anywhere. She asked around, but nobody knew where she went. And she was definitely there because Anne saw her onstage right before the performance, but, by then, it was too late to speak to her. Anne just decided to see her afterwards, which was easier said than done because, once again, Joan was nowhere in sight.
Anne was about to give up, since it was almost time to leave, but then she spotted the girl in the break room playing a card game by herself at the round bar table. She considered charging in and barking at her about where she’s been, but she didn’t want to freak her out, so she just walked in calmly.
“Hey, Joan,” She said cooly, noticing the way the music director’s hand froze as she was setting down a card. She grabbed a water bottle from the mini fridge and sat down at the chair across from Joan. “Whatcha doing?”
“Just...playing a card game my brother taught me.” The girl replied meekly.
Joan had a brother? The articles on her said nothing about him...
“You had cards back then?” Anne asked, as if she hadn’t been born in the same time period.
“No, we used strips of wood we would tear off from people’s houses and carved symbols on them with knives.”
Anne blinked.
“...Oh. That’s...”
“Concerning?” Joan finally glanced up from her deck of cards to look at Anne. A ghost of a smile graced her lips for a moment before she tilted her head back down with a light laugh. “I know.”
“Mind if I play?”
She’s glanced at again- scanned, as if Joan was expecting her to pull something and make a joke out of her. But then she gave in and began collecting the cards from how they’re laid out on the table.
“This game is too complicated to explain,” She said. “But we can play Speed?”
After a quick rundown of the rules, Anne agreed and the game began.
And honestly? It was great. Joan genuinely laughed and smiled as they playfully bickered and argued over the card game. She almost looked like a happy little lamb frolicking in a field of flowers.
On their third round, Kitty peeks into the break room.
“There you are, Annie!” She said. “I was looking for you!”
“Oh, hey, Kit!” Anne said. Out of the corner of her eye, she definitely saw Joan clench her jaw. The drawing of Kitty and Killer Frost’s claws and then the bloody sketch briefly flashed in her mind. “What’s up?”
“We’re leaving,” Kitty informed. “We had dinner plans tonight, remember?”
Joan sighed softly and began to pick up the cards. Anne gently pressed her hand down.
“I think I’m going to pass tonight, Kit.”
Both blondes looked shocked- Joan more than Kitty from the way her head whipped up fast enough to give her whiplash.
“How come?” Kitty asked, clearly confused. “I thought you really wanted to go to this pub...”
“I know, but I’m hanging out with Joan right now.” Anne said. “Just bring me home something if you can!”
Kitty blinked several times, glanced at Joan, then nodded and walked out.
“You didn’t have to stay,” Joan whispered.
“I wanted to, though.” Anne assured her. She gently took the deck of cards from Joan’s clenched hands and began dealing them out. “Wanna keep playing Speed or try War? I’ve played with Aragon before. I swear, she ALMOST broke my nose in anger!”
“You followed me last night.”
Anne blinked.
“Yeah, of course,” She said. “I had no idea you could draw so well. You’re very talented.”
A hot pink blush dusts Joan’s cheeks and she looked away. She anxiously plays with the corner of an ace of spades. The slight drizzle that had been tapping on the window starts to pick up.
“I-”
She’s embarrassed, Anne realized. Embarrassed and horrified because she knows Anne saw the gruesome drawings she had made.
She believes that Anne thinks she’s sick. Or a freak. Or a monster.
Anne would admit that they’re a little weird, but a lot of artists liked to make horrific art. Nothing wrong with that, especially if they were vents.
“Joan-”
“Why are you doing this?” Joan asked quietly. She looked up and centuries worth of loneliness and neglect and pain reflect in her stormy grey eyes. “What do you want?”
Finally, Anne understood.
“Look,” Anne said. “I know we don’t know each other that well, but I’m still worried about you. No one deserves to be alone.”
Joan froze. She just stared at Anne in shock for a long time before tears fill her eyes and start to run down her cheeks. She tries to stop them, but it’s clear she’s been bottling this all up for a long time and won’t be able to hold it back any longer.
“Y-you want to be my friend?” Joan whispered.
“Yes, Joan.” Anne answered her honestly, not missing a beat. “You deserve someone who cares about you.”
The most heartbreaking whimper Anne has ever heard strangled itself out of Joan’s throat. The tears start to come down faster.
“N-nobody— Nobody has ever w-wanted to—”
“Oh, Joan...”
Anne quickly got out of her chair and walked around to Joan’s side of the table. She wrapped her arms around the girl and she immediately slumped into her embrace, clinging back like Anne was her life line.
“Oh, Joan,” Anne said again. “Oh, you poor, sweet little thing...”
Joan began to openly sob against her shoulder. Her hands claw at the back of Anne’s shirt, desperate for a good hold.
“I’ve- I’ve been alone f-for so long—” She wept.
“Shh, shh,” Anne hushed her. She began to rub her back soothingly. “I’ve got you now, honey. I’ve got you. I won’t let you go.”
That elicits a sharp whimper from Joan, who burrows herself even closer to the queen’s warmth. And she stays like that, half slid out of her stool, clutching onto Anne Boleyn like her life depended on it until she was able to choke back the rest of her tears.
“Feeling any better?” Anne asked. She was still rubbing Joan’s back, as the girl had yet to pull back from the embrace.
Joan shrugged weakly. “A-little.” She croaked. “N-not...not good. But better. B-because you’re here.”
Anne’s heart simultaneously broke and melted.
“You sweet girl,” She said lovingly. “I want to be here for you from now on. Is that alright?”
Joan nodded. “Please...”
“Alright,” Anne said. She gently pressed Joan back and gave her her water bottle, which she never actually opened. “Drink something for me, sweetheart.”
Joan obeyed and took a few small sips of the water. It soothed her dry throat, which was weak from the outpour of emotions.
“Good girl,” Anne said encouragingly. “Hey, here’s an idea! Why don’t we go back to my house and watch a movie? I know there’s a tray of lasagna we could heat up! If you want to, that is.”
“N-no, that’s-” Joan sniffled. “I would really, really like that...”
Anne smiled warmly at her.
“Wonderful.”
———
When the other queens came home later that evening, none of them were expecting to see Anne sitting on the couch with the music director’s head in her lap, but that’s the sight they were greeted to.
They both looked content, Anne with a loving smile on her lips and Joan with a peaceful expression settled on her face as she slept. One of Anne’s hands was stroking through Joan’s hair and the other was holding a book, which she looked up from when the front door opened.
“Hey, ladies,” She said, momentarily setting down Wings of Fire- The Dragonet Prophecy. “How was dinner?”
———
A day later, Anne got a notification on her phone saying that @force-be-with-ewe had posted. When she checks it, she sees a digital drawing of Killer Frost being nuzzled lovingly by a large, emerald green dragon.
The caption simply reads, “Thank you for giving me a chance”
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lotornomiko · 3 years
Text
Triumph’s Tribulation Five Sneak Peak
Ah I usually don’t like posting until a chapter is complete, but I am having a lot of problems offline, in addition to the the third and final segment of the chapter, the check in on Midgard, is giving me no end of difficulties. It was supposed to be a Rufus POV but seeing as his POV keeps derailing the fic and my timeline, I will take whoever I can get to be the narrating voice for Alicia and Co. at this point.
I’ve actually debated posting five as it is, but I am trying to have each chapter have three segments, even if one segment ends up being incrediably small like the Lenneth interlude was in uh was it chapter two...?
Right now I have Loki (With Frei!) and Lezard’s parts done...I am posting the Lezard part at least...it[’s mostly finalized, although I’ll probably tweak some words here and there when I go over it for the umpteenth millionth time...X_X
I’d say this scene is PG 13, though it is Lezard so has some darker edge to it...but still hopefully worksafe...! Side note, the A ending got strongly influenced after rewatching the A ending, and all the events leading up to it. It left me with the strong impression and opinion that Lenneth had some kind of mental, nervous break down when the seal broke. I think I even wrote down a few lines from it...if not to use in this chapter, then maybe a future one! I’m also currently in the midst of rewatching VP 2: Silmeria...so maybe that will find my muse for the Midgard crew in this! XD
Onto the scene excerpt now!!
====
The marble of the floor had sealed itself together seamlessly, not so much as a sliver of a crack to betray the chaos that had gone on just moments earlier. That of the anger that had been felt, the world itself a living extension of what had been in its God’s heart. Such has been Lezard’s displeasure that in that moment, Creation itself had acted, moving to protect him and his interests, spiriting the frightened Goddess away to somewhere else safe. Safe from his rage, and safe from his desires, the man who had once been human,  having pushed too hard, too fast, too soon.
She wasn’t ready. He knew that, every bit from her fight to her flight had in fact acknowledged it, the fear that was in Lenneth’s heart. It had sent her running, the Goddess scared, not so much of what he might do to her physically as much as the emotional havoc he had been intent on wreaking. The truths that had needed to be confronted, and with it would come all of its pain, such sorrow born of those lies that the woman had told herself. She wouldn’t be spared its sting, not even God himself able to shelter Lenneth from the agony of breaking free of such warped delusions. The comfort it had once given her, was now nothing more than a crutch, one that that divine beauty needed to break free of if that heart of hers was going to stand a chance at any true solace.
It wouldn’t be easy, that fact something Lezard could acknowledge in his more rational moments. His beloved needed a far gentler hand than he had thus far been capable of, that near overpowering lust of his, making him impatient and clumsy whenever she was so near. So consumed with the want of her, his attempt at a controlled veneer had all but shattered when her fear had turned violent, Lenneth’s fist finding its mark against his jaw. It had left him so close to doing something unforgivable, illusions torn and discarded if not for his world acting instead. Protecting him as much as her, Lenneth swallowed up whole into an abyss that had opened up beneath her feet.
Even now she was still there, free falling in an endless darkness, that heart of hers in an absolute turmoil that would only be the start of her unraveling. There was both pain and pleasure in the idea of it, Lenneth this intoxicating brand of everything that Lezard could have ever wanted. Her heart, her soul, that of her mind and her body, her tears, her agony, and that of her happiness, the man wanted it all. He was obsessed with the having of it, of attaining paradise with so perfect a being. It was so close to a reality, that he could almost taste it, his blood stained hands reaching for it, for her, Lezard this newly remade being, the ultimate Lord of it all, Lenneth and the effect she has always had on him, the one thing this God could not control.
Even now he was tempted, sheer folly though it would be to go after her right now. Lenneth was too wild in the moment, too angry and afraid, tormented by a truth he had only merely hinted at, such insinuations holding the strength to make a Goddess reel in an absolute terror. It was a fear not just for herself, for what might be done to her, but that of her world, the paradise that she had created. That perfect utopia that was nothing more than a lie that her wounded soul had retreated into, every insinuation that Lezard could make had the power to tear that universe apart from the root, the very foundations it had been built and brought to life upon.
It was a world of desires, that perfect paradise grounded in a pain so blatant that it had nearly torn the Goddess apart. That heart of hers that had been so ripped to pieces by the sins committed against her, it had left Lenneth reeling in an agony even she herself had not understood, the Goddess so overwhelmed in the moment as to escape into a fantasy. An illusion, the deceits woven there all by her own hand, the ageless woman latching onto a figment, the fragment that had been dangling before her. Seizing upon it, with that earring in her hand, out of all the lives she had slept through, it had been the latest, that of a child, a girl no older than fourteen when she had died, that had helped feed into a delusion. In that moment she had been thinking not as a Goddess, but as a human, a child, torn apart by a loss that had been about more than just one man’s death.
The seal had been broken, a flood gate of emotions overtaking the Goddess. How much agony had it been, to remember them all, every last life that had hosted Lenneth inside them. The highs and the lows, their joys and their pains, hundreds upon hundreds of women, all helping to shape the Valkyrie’s humanity. Her compassionate heart, the depth of her millennia of experience far more than anything those scant fourteen years as Platina could have given. She was just a sliver of what had helped shaped the Goddess, so small and inferior a speck, the child was not who Lenneth was meant to be.
So much more than any one human girl, Lenneth was in fact a being so uniquely her own. A caring Goddess, one whose capacity to feel and sympathize with the mortals a threat that Odin and the other Gods could not abide by. They hadn’t killed her, they had done WORSE, the woman’s free will taken from her, her true sense of being SEALED away.
A safeguard meant to control that which the Gods could not understand, that human compassion that that particular Goddess had been gifted with, the likes of which had been cultivated and learned over the course of a millennia of different hosts. Through them she had loved, and Lenneth had cared, the woman so wholly unique in her ability to FEEL, the Goddess the champion that the mortals had needed. The Gods had feared it, feared Lenneth and the allegiance that such emotions had wrought, Odin needing the Valkyrie to be a good little soldier who fell into line with his own selfish wants. Unable to dominate her as she had truly been, that tyrannous God had tried to eradicate her spirit, that of her true self, through such archaic means, such a brutal manipulation of the self, such that Lenneth had been little more than a doll. A puppet, beautiful and perfect, and so wholly without the feelings that would have interfered with the Heavens’ schemes.
The Gods had seen her as nothing more than a Death Goddess, a chooser of the slain to bolster their own armies with the souls of dead heroes. They had let her pick from the brave as though they were mere flowers, calling into service warriors from all corners of Midgard. Leaving her exposed to the very thing that the Gods themselves had feared, the emotions that were so plentiful in the humans, putting cracks in the shield erected around Lenneth’s heart. Bit by bit, that ancient magic had been worn away, the seal itself eroded with each and every encounter, until it had finally shattered, and with it went Lenneth’s mind, the woman having snapped.
It must have been so, so overwhelming, to have been hit at once with all those feelings, with the many lives she had slept through, their hopes, their desires, all coming to life within Lenneth in startling clarity. Was it any wonder she had lost her true self in the process, spinning from one host to another, again and again, until she had latched onto the most recent, that of the child, those scant years of fourteen the most overwhelming dream of them all given how fresh it had still been.
Even grounded in that child’s psyche, it had proved too much. Lezard himself had born witness to it, to that mental break that the Goddess had had. The tears that had fallen, the screaming that had been done, it hadn’t been just the Goddess, but the child, Platina, made horrified by the one solace of her life, Lucian the only kindness and warmth she had ever known, LOST, killed in turn by his own refusal to let go of his own delusions.
It had all been such a mess, a tragedy the likes of which all else had fallen short. Her puppet strings not just severed, but left tangled across the board, Lenneth had been operating on a grief born madness, forgetting who she really was, to play fantasy for one ignorant human. For some fake facsimile of him, Lucian a shadow, his miraculous return to life nothing more than a figment born of Lenneth’s own desperation and desires. Instead of the warrior she had known, he was something new, a puppet who was nothing more than some idealized version of who she had thought him to be, Lucian just one of the many dolls whose every thought had been painstakingly crafted by Lenneth’s power.
Creation itself had been remade on desire, on such potent delusions and lies, the many souls there not the people they had once been. They were just shadows of those that had died, annihilated in the Ragnarok that Lucian had helped Loki bring about. It hadn’t just ended lives, it had wiped out everything, including that of nearly every living being’s soul from existence, such devastation a permanent end, the cycle of rebirth itself destroyed. Such finality was there to it, that no one, not even God, could fight against, the world and its people entirely eradicated.
It left the world in complete ruins, Lenneth’s land a paradise populated in lies. It was a copy, a mere imitation of what had once been, formulated out of fragmented glimpses, the memories she had gathered, the people there nothing more than a pathetic bunch of puppets. They were just these hollow husks of what she thought them to be, these seemingly ideal versions ultimately falling short, all an attempt that was unfulfilling when it came towards truly easing the pain in the Goddess’ heart. They were all lies that couldn’t make her truly happy, anymore than they could satisfy her needs. Each and every last one of them, Lenneth living in a farce, a waking dream that could crumble apart so easily given the right push. If enough care wasn’t given, the Goddess would crumble again with it, her psyche perhaps lost to yet another kind of fantasy.
Lezard couldn’t lie and claim that he hadn’t considered it. Hadn’t given thought to molding Lenneth into a fantasy that would suit HIM best. But ultimately, he didn’t want the illusion, that of those broken remnants of who the Goddess had once been. He wouldn’t be satisfied with just a sliver, wouldn’t embrace the farce of just one of her sides. He wanted her everything and her all, Lezard made mad with the desire, with that need. It fueled him, his obsession with Lenneth the motivating strength that had led Lezard into doing the impossible again and again. He had died for her, traveled through time for her, even become a God for her, such a warped semblance of love a catalyst that had no limits and no match. Not even Lucian could compete, that young man unable to see past Platina, and past the Valkyrie, to the supreme manifestation of the woman, a Goddess so sublime as to move a heart that had once been so unfeeling.
Her mark left on him, Lenneth had helped shaped Lezard into this mad man, so utterly devoted in the pursuit of her. Worlds had been ruined, people slaughtered, time itself run roughshod all over, yet his hands were no less dirty than any of the other Gods. Than even HERS, Lezard creating his own world, his own perfect paradise to ease the pain that was in HIS heart. That it spilled hurt onto others, was of no concern, Lezard an unfeeling God who had no desire to rule or be worshiped by anyone other than by Lenneth.
Such blasphemies should have been sins enough to weigh even God down, yet Lezard was instead made unburdened by it all, free of the demands the throne of Creation should have made of him. He was free, having discarded duty the way he had discarded bodies, nothing but time on his hand, and power, and harboring a patience that was fast running out.
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