in fact, I really hate it when people are shy or worried about the fact that they like Octavian or even apologize for it. like what the fuck? why the hell should anyone feel uncomfortable at all because they like something and at the same time it does not harm others in any way? I do not know about you, but I am simply horrified by this situation, and I do not even know who to blame for this more than fandom or Rick
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Fic Summary: It's been nearly ten years since they saw each other. Ten years since they lived in the same state, much less occupied the same room. Ten years since they were friends; eight and a half since Will stopped referring to Mike as such, much less his best one.
Ten years, and here Mike is, and here Will is, and here’s the guy in the chinos who just bought Will’s first friend, first love, first heartbreak a drink. Here is what the poets call cosmic fucking irony, Will thinks: the setup for the world’s unfunniest a guy walks into a bar joke, and Will’s the punchline. Will’s been punched in the gut.
(or, after ten years of no contact, will encounters mike wheeler in a new york city bar, and he doesn't know what to do about it.)
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I haven't posted in a long time.
My anxiety and depression have backslid a lot in the last year. My social anxiety and agoraphobia are particularly out of control.
I have fallen out of producing fandom content, frankly because I have been too afraid to. Fandoms have become a lot more charged than they were when I was younger. I keep trying to get into new fandoms that I hope are less problematic only to stumble across the same patterns, up to and including someone being harassed and told to 'kys' repeatedly over fandom drama to the point of ending their own life.
But being isolated is hard. I haven't stopped making content I just... Stopped sharing it. I don't really know what to do, or if any followers I have here are even still active. I got back into JoJo's and expected most of the discourse to be more 'gay vs not gay' type stuff but some parts are... Really, *really* bad. Worse even than KH. And inconsistent! Censoring myself to fit some fear mongering anti's agenda seems like an anathema, so I just haven't posted anything, even the stuff I have I know isn't problematic.
To me the 'right' thing to do would be to post anyway and stand up for a censorship free Internet and community, but I'm afraid that, especially right now, I just don't have the resilience.
I guess I'm asking people more in touch with a 2024 Tumblr what they think. If it's even worth it. What tools there are. I've spent half the day blocking hate in a tag and trying not to panic about it. As an actual abuse survivor, seeing some of these accusations fly over such inane things is just... Disheartening. Especially knowing my abusers will never be prosecuted, but I'm getting accused of those crimes by trying to cope through artistic expression.
Also if there is anyone interested in some of the 'problematic' ships I've tagged, please give me a ring. I might try finishing and posting some stuff after all of it will actually make people happy. But after seeing witch hunt posts calling for people to haze or blacklist certain crators? It's just... Really scary.
But I'm so tired of being alone.
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the rapid progression of the digital circus fandom is so interesting to watch unfold. like. i dont think its popularity is undeserved?? like i didnt personally think it was that funny, but its really well made and i liked all the characters and the presentation was cool. i can see why it went viral. but even when it comes to viral sensation-type fandoms i dont think ive ever seen Swap AUs and "who broke it" animatics showing up on my timeline when the media itself hasnt even been out for two full weeks yet
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I am really happy that the last Touka fanart I made got notes from a lot of great TG blogs, because I recognize a lot of them already since the fandom is small nowadays. Its nice to see everyone, especially people I already reblogged posts from or follow. Its nice to see blogs I havent discovered too.
But man... I am restraining myself so hard from just going on a reblog spree. I am trying to keep the brainrot in just a little while longer until I do a manga reread and make an entire sideblog dedicated to it probably.
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