#its the funniest thing like DID YOU WRITE ALL STAR THOUGH??

[serenityinstone]

Thanks For Nothing

Yandere America x G.N. Reader

TW: General Yandereness | Implied Kidnapping | Imprisonment | America feeds you food with a fork so idk | Non-consensual kissing (just for a moment) | Thanksgiving? | Reader is tied up

If you can't tell I'm really bad at adding tw's but I always find it helpful to avoid stuff I don't want to read so I tried my best. Go ahead and tell me if there's something I missed.

Also, I know Thanksgiving was two days ago I randomly got the urge to write this last night. I'm like slightly embarrassed by this but I haven't posted anything in over a year so you get this.

Tableware clinked against wood as it was gingerly laid down by an uncommonly careful hand. The room was well lit with candles flickering shadows across the walls, a large chandelier over top. The table was set with an orange and red color scheme with autumn bleeding into every aspect of decoration. Even though only two would be used, eight seats had been set in nothing but false pageantry. The smell of baking turkey wafted in from the kitchen off the ways. Most of the other food had already made its place on the table, surrounding a cornucopia, reflective only in name. Six chairs, three on each side, were all tightly pushed into the table, ready for the use of no one. The spread was massive and one could wonder how only two people, the only residents of the large house, would finish it all.

Humming came from the kitchen, the voice masculine in pitch. The tune was easily recognizable as the Star Spangled Banner, which was more a feat to hum then one would expect. Some of the high notes came out scratchy and the mumbling of the lyrics did nothing to ascertain any kind of satisfying harmony. Both rooms were pleasantly warm, though the kitchen held itself in a higher regard after repeat use of the oven and stove. Light leaked out through the open windows as it bathed the rest of the house.

It was pitch dark outside and a person coming or going could see no more than fifteen feet in front of them. Not that there would be any extra guests anyways. The building was located in the middle of nowhere, a long, winding road the only gleam of civilization. At one point the property had been a farm, but after the changing of owners, its purpose drastically changed.

The deafening silence was interrupted by repeated shifting, a desperate attempt to move. This sound was picked up by the ears of the blonde in the other room. He stuck his head in the doorway, the cowlick on top denying gravity its rightful dues. His blue eyes twinkled with amusement, though you could see none of it. In fact you could see nothing at all. You couldn’t see, you couldn’t speak, you couldn’t move. All you could do was listen. The man laughed boisterously like you had just said the funniest thing in the world.

“Don’t worry!” He said, knocking on the wall in a way meant to exude comfort. “It's almost done.”

Any chance you had of escape was quickly ticking away alongside that turkey clock, and yet you could do nothing. Maybe he really was the original boy scout because his knots were flawless. Arms bound tight to a chair, any attempts at kicking did nothing to loosen the ropes tying your legs to the chair’s. Your back was flush with the chair, cord tightly wrapped around your torso. You were, in all sense of the word, stuck.

The silk material used to blind your sight was far softer than the harsh twine of the ropes. The same was used to bind your mouth. Any of the tears you had cried had long since dried, making the cloth more uncomfortable and sticky than before. What did you do to deserve this?

Time to ponder than question was quickly snatched away as the retro cooking clock sprang to life. You snapped your head towards the sound, not having prepared yourself for it. Suddenly the smell of turkey became stronger than ever before and you swore you could feel its heat as the man set it down on the table. He lit what you could only assume were candles before approaching you. You visibly shook as he gently removed the blindfold.

Blinking furiously to adjust to the light, your pupils contracted at the heavy light, causing you to shut them closed and throw your head down away from the obtrusive shine. A large hand came above you to pet the top of your head. He kneeled down on one knee, grasping your arm, which was still bound to the chair’s, and gently massaged the skin. He almost didn’t seem real, the light making him look like an angel. Then he looked back up at you, sky blue eyes piercing your own (e/c) ones. Any thoughts of a divine existence were quickly washed away as you stared deep into the possessive pools that were his oculus. The man smiled at you, wiping away a tear you hadn’t realized had fell. He licked the thumb that had made contact with the salted droplet, never breaking eye contact with you. 

He abruptly stood up, shifting his attention over to the extravagant feast on the table. He quickly piled on his own plate, seemingly stacking it sky high, before coming back over to your side and collected your piece of dishware. Moving around the table, he began to fill your own plate, though not nearly as large as his own. He placed it back down next its proper napkin, an orange maple leaf.

The man began to slice apart his pieces of turkey, clearly satisfied with how it had come out. It didn’t take him long to begin gobbling down his food like a hungry soldier on the battlefield. He talked while chewing once or twice in a way that would have made a proper British noble scoff in disgust. Though he quickly quit after he realized that he was eating like such. A look fell across his face that made you think that he might have been told off for a bad habit like that. From then on he ate properly, carefully using his utensils and always chewing with his mouth closed.

From the moment he had brought the turkey in, you had felt your mouth water. You hadn’t eaten anything all day and the food laying out before you felt torturous. You didn’t make a sound however, trying to conserve all of your energy into not bursting into another round of tears. Your stomach on the other hand, had no such qualms, and loudly made its presence known.

The blonde looked over at you, to your uneaten plate of food, and then back to you. He was about to ask why you hadn’t started eating before he realized the obvious. Gulping down the last of his diet soda, of which he had put into a glass with ice to look slightly nicer, he made his way past the table and back over to you.

All you could do was sit there, cursing your stomach and every decision that led you to this horrible fate. Standing at far over six feet, he easily towered over you, causing the shaking from earlier to come back tenfold. You must have looked like a frightened little lamb to the big bad wolf. He cupped your face in his hands, rough from years of war. By now you had begun hyperventilating, shoulders moving up and down in desperate disharmony. You tried to suck as much air as possible in but the gag in your mouth stopped most of the air flow. He reached his right hand farther up your face and you squeezed your eyes shut, trying to pretend you were any place but here. Any images of tropical vacation were vanquished after he softly removed the fabric. It was soaked with hours worth of saliva and he threw it off to the side on the table.

Properly swallowing for the first time in hours, your lips finally closed. You still shook but had noticeably calmed down as he focused on your lips.

“A-Alfred.” You finally whispered. “W-Why? I don’t u-understand.”

Tears still occasionally fell down and you desperately wanted to hide your face from him with your hands, but couldn’t because of your binds. You desperately searched his eyes for some clue, a hint, anything. But there was nothing there but pure, unbridled, adoration. His face melted into a content smile and he dove in to kiss you with no prior warning.

His lips melded against yours and he furiously attacked them until you opened. The man pressed you farther against the chair, using both of his hands to keep your head in place. His tongue swirled around your mouth, traversing every cavity and frantically tried to keep your own in this cursed dance. He finally parted from you, a string of saliva connecting you until it finally snapped.

Even more tears had begun to form, all threatening to fall at the slightest motion or whisper. Alfred brushed his thumb over your soaked eyelash, clearing your vision in that eye for just a moment.

“Does that answer your question?” He placed his head in the crook of your neck, taking in the smell. “I just love you that much.”

Suddenly reminded as to why he had come over to the other side of the table, Alfred quickly pulled out an empty chair and sat next to you. He unwound the napkin and the utensils, placing all of them in the correct positionings like he had been taught to do. He then pulled the plate towards the edge of the table, carefully stabbing a piece of turkey he had cut apart with a fork.

“Say aww!” He urged, but you knew it was more of a command.

You opened your mouth, feeling completely demeaned by the nature of the situation. He couldn’t even let you use your own hands. Your chewing was slow as your mouth still hurt from the gag. Alfred didn’t seem to mind as he just fed you another piece, repeating the cycle a few more times. Finally it seemed like he had finally gotten enough out of you and stopped, only to be repeated with a different food instead. As you were chewing, he spoke adoringly to you.

“I love you (Y/n).” He said as he continued to dote on you. “Happy Thanksgiving.”

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

So, what does everyone else do when there’s really depressing news on a weekend that’s painful and triggering and makes them want to distract themselves with the very silly other things? Does everyone else make a second edition of their thing that was originally meant to be a relatively short compilation but got out of hand and became a feature film?

The original version started out as a way to collect clips from various Bugle episodes in which John Oliver talks about the harrowing experience of existing on the same plane of reality as Sarah Palin, because I thought his absolute devastation about that was funny. But as it went along, I added some Daily Show clips, and then I added pictures over the audio, and then I added some video over the audio, and then next thing I knew, it was 74 minutes long. I had accidentally made a documentary/romcom about the story of John Oliver and Sarah Palin. A story that Andy Zaltzman, at one point during the documentary, acknowledges is like a romcom, and they suggest it’s like John Oliver is living the Groundhog Day movie. So that became the title of my, I’ll say it again, feature film. I called it A Groundhog Day of Hatred.

Today, I needed a distraction from the fact that everyone in the world is a terrible person, so I updated it. I added onto the end a clip from last summer’s Last Week Tonight, and a clip from last week’s Strike Force Five podcast, as both of those had not aired when I originally made this last year. It now runs at 119 minutes. Getting to the point where if this were a real movie, it would be too long.

Here’s the shiny new one, in all its glory. A Groundhog Day of Hatred, second edition:

Okay, that would be a bit of a weird thing to do with my time today, but not that bad. You know what would be worse? If in my search for distractions, I'd created a romcom-style movie poster for it:

Look, I'm being self-deprecating about what a colossal waste of time this was, but I also think this is fucking hilarious. That poster might be the funniest thing I've ever made. I will draw your attention to the top of the page, in which I chose to advertise the film with a pull quote from Richard Ayoade (whom I remembered today was John Oliver's best friend at Cambridge, and God, fuck that guy). Richard Ayoade really did write that exact thing as a pull quote, though in reality, of course, it was for Graham Linehan's book. I think we should all start a trend of quoting that Richard Ayoade statement but pretending he was talking about something besides Graham Linehan. That is a good bit, everyone get on board with it.

There is also a pull quote from the excellent @lastweeksshirttonight, who really outdid themself in capturing the style of bullshit faux-academic language in things like that.

The picture in the bottom right corner also appears in the video itself, and I was so proud of myself for finding it last year. In one of the Bugle clips, Andy Zaltzman talks about opening The Daily Mail website and seeing a picture of John Oliver and Sarah Palin on the front page. I searched for ages to find that picture, knowing I had to put it in the documentary, as visual accompaniment to the part of the audio where they talk about that. After literal hours and hours of searching, I finally thought to use the Wayback Machine, where I spent another hour trying various dates from the week before that Bugle episode aired, before I finally found it, halfway down a page that was actually a link away from the main page. But it was worth the effort, because I managed to find a picture that perfectly encapsulated the spirit of my documentary.

It has all the elements of a great film. It has anger, confusion, one man's descent into darkness. It has a battle for the soul of a nation. It has an educational element about a period of American political history. It has some tasteful nudity (audio nudity only, no visual nudity, that's what makes it tasteful). It has a star-crossed relationship. It has a harrowing journey with a note of hope at the end, followed by an epilogue. What more could you want?

It has one part where Andy Zaltzman makes a somewhat less-than-ideal comment about how she can't be VP because she has five kids to raise. In his defence, he was trying to point out the hypocrisy in someone preaching family values and then taking a job that stops them from raising their family, and I've heard Zaltzman point out that exact hypocrisy in male politicians as well, so this wasn't a specifically gendered comment. But still, I thought I'd acknowledge that it doesn't come off great when someone says something like that about a woman in the public eye. You live and you learn. You cannot hold people to everything they said in 2008.

I do think this is a genuinely interesting relic of a bygone era in American politics, when this sort of ludicrousness seemed shocking and worth being horrified about, rather than totally normalized. So my film has value as an archive for posterity. I shall premiere it at Sundance next year.

[sepyana]

Jjba Diamond is Unbreakable Ep. 8-16 Thoughts

Ep. 8-9

Yukako has so many issues god bless

I've taken a liking to her design. Her color scheme goes together well, her hair has a lot of character and I do like the rose emblem on her outfit.

Her stand, Love Deluxe, plays the prehensile hair trope straight, other than her ability to control her hair even when it is not attached to her scalp. I like the name but I find this type of stand boring to be honest.

I'm not really interested in Yukako as a character, unless she gets something more later on. The funniest thing they can do is pair her and Koichi together. "Me and my girl don't argue, she tells me to shup up and I do" and such.

Josuke and Okuyasu were nice this episode. We learn that Crazy Diamond can't bring back anything The Hand deletes. Just goes to show how opposite their powers are.

Koichi is not really my cup of tea. I appreciate him being part of the group but solo episodes with him don't really interest me. Plus his voice is incredibly grating in both sub and dub. It's interesting that he set up that rock so that Yukako wouldn't die, you gotta be really confident that you'll win if you are worrying about the safety of your opponent.

Hey, Koichi with the new hair kinda looks like... No I shan't say it.

Let's talk about Echoes. My boy. My lil man. Look at his lil smile :) My favourite stand from part 4 so far. It seems to emote on its own sometimes, like Star Platinum who smiles every time it gets a chance to beat someone up. I like it when stands emote on their own. The fanworks do this a lot but jjba itself rarely does it. Which is a shame.

Ep. 10

This is just 20 minutes of Okuyasu having nice things happen to him and I think that's just great. If I had so say my one gripe (and be a killjoy), it would be that it doesn't tell us much about Okuyasu and Josuke that we don't already know. The best thing about filler is that it gives us characterization and I don't think this episode has enough of that.

Okuyasu and Josuke fighting reminded me of the Death 13 episode except Polnareff was infinitely more stubborn

Also this is a great time to just give the VAs the biggest shout out cuz wow I love them. Especially Okuyasu I love the way he says Josuke. It brings me joy. They are perfect fits for the characters they are playing. I can hear Tonio's accent but I know fuck all about Japanese so It might be horrible, not my problem tho.

Ep 11 - 12

I think Tomoko is one of my favourite female Jojo characters so far. The bar is on the ground, but, you know. Take what you can get.

I don't get why they added that scene with Josuke at the start. It doesn't really add anything.

I think the funniest thing in episode 11 is Koichi and Okuyasu just going through it and the Jojos not giving a shit. I hate the Joestars so much it's unreal. It did struck me as a bit weird. It's not at all weird for Jotaro (Have you seen the stardust crusaders? They told Polnareff they lied about Avdol's death to him and then they had the audacity to go "I didn't think you'd be this hurt"), It does feel a bit off for Josuke though.

Jotaro smiling as he says Jospeh could die is amazing. Of course he would.

I didn't think about what Red Hor Chili Pepper's stand user would look like but I am definitely not dissapointed in Akira. Personality wise he is insanely boring but I do like his design.

Okuyasu looking at his own hand as he thanks Koichi was a nice touch.

I like how they handled Joseph. Obviously Josuke is not gonna be amazed to see him but It wouldn't go with his personality if he was antagonistic either.

Ep 13

I don't like how different the japanese VA of Joseph sounds when he is yelling. English VA doesn't have this issue but it's also was the weakest of the sdc cast imo. No winning with this one.

Ep 14 - 15

The first episode is just set up. It does that job pretty well though. Really makes Rohan seem insane. I mean, he *is*.

Rohan relating everything to art and writing isn't even that off from how most artists think tbh. Writers will see a documentary about the most disturbing shit they have ever seen and they will go "That will make my writing about this part more accurate".

And Rohan'a advice is actually pretty good. Like, draw with references. Draw from reality. Base your characters on people who you know, instead of like, just taking from your favourite artisans. Anyways,

Rohan's stand is called the Heaven's Door. Firstly, It's a really cute stand. Secondly, this thing is busted. It'd be one thing if looking at a draft was the only way for it to work but touching you with his stand also works. And he can knock someone unconcious when unfurling them. Add on that the insane speed he has for no reason and honestly we should just be glad this guy isn't a villain. He is just weird and offputting.

I fucking love episode 15. The pay off is amazing. I love that Okuyasu and Josuke notice something small like a cut on his hand and immediately help him. I love that Rohan opens Josuke's eyes by insulting his hair. And then he just. keeps. going.

Josuke being literary so blinded by rage that he doesn't see the draft? Amazing. He absolutely destroyed that place. And threw a fucking chair at Okuyasu and Koichi. This show is pretty funny when it wants to be.

The story of his hair was really sweet. The guy helping them seems to be a student like the current day Josuke too.

Ep 16

The art style for this episode looks different from normal and I have no idea why. The style is ussually pretty consistent. You can see the gums in their teeth it's strange.

Jotaro gets a slight outfit change. I like the colors and the tilted belts. I'm not sure on the new jacket. I liked that they used the collar of his shirt to give the same vibe as his part 3 outfit insead of just giving him a jacket exactly like his old one. His new jacket is a bit dissapointing. I like dolphins. I'm not sure what they were trying to do with the triangle and the sun. Overall, I like the older one just a bit more. I would love it if he kept changing outfits like this tho.

It's something that Jotaro can't seem to seperate Star Platinum's time stop ability from Dio. Like, that's Star Platinum's power.

As funny as seeing Jotaro get his ass beat by a Twitch looking ass rat is, It's also shows what I like about stands. I know Jotaro is holding back here, but that doesn't change the fact that this is a bad machup for him. So you don't need to nerf him in ordert to create conflict. Stands are good against combatting power creep, is what I'm saying.

Love Crazy Diamond popping up out of nowhere just to look sad. Don't look at me with them big ol' eyes.

Ep. 17

I think one thing part 4 is good at is the character dynamics. Rohan and Koichi was fun to watch. Rohan grinning at Koichi getting flustered was great. Reimi being really friendly with Rohan cuz she knew him when he was a kid is a nice bit of writing.

I made a joke post about where Kak went after death, a few people mentioned how ghosts were real and he could be like Reimi. Now I know what they are talking about.

Reimi has a nice design. Especially the choker with the hands holding on it. Speaking of hands

I know I shouldn't be laughing at the guy whose only trait so far is that he kills young girls to date their hands to satisfy his stupid fetish or something but

what even is that music. Why did they make it like that.

To close this off, I am currently on vacation with little internet access. It's a rural area so there isn't much to do. I've been spending my time writing these, slowly. Gonna take a hot minute to finish this part.

I've been also wondering if I should watch Stone Ocean before Golden Wind and get the Jotaro story over with. I'll decide that later, I dunno.

[jacquelinemerritt]

Dragon Ball Z: Abridged Episode 55 Review

Originally posted September 3rd, 2018

Sometimes, it’s nice to just hang out with well-written characters.

In the process of reviewing a show week after week, it’s easy to lose sight of the nature of what makes that show enjoyable, as the demand to say something relatively interesting about the show requires that the show provide you with something worth saying anything about.

This is a long way of saying that in my previous reviews, I focused a lot on whether or not each episode was moving the story forward, as any episode that pushed the story forward tended to also provide me with interesting things to talk about, and had a lot of trouble finding anything of value to say about the episodes that were less plot focused, and more character focused.

That doesn’t mean that there is anything inherently wrong with the more character focused episodes of Dragonball Z: Abridged, though, and “It’s Been A Year If It’s Been A Day” is pretty exemplary of Team Four Star’s strengths when it comes to writing these character focused episodes.

It helps that unlike earlier entries in this season, this episode makes no pretensions of attempting to move the plot forward, but even if it did, part of the joy of watching Dragonball Z: Abridged is getting to hang out with its cast of funny and infinitely likable characters, and that joy is present even when the show struggles to move the plot forward (mostly due to the wonky pacing of its source material).

This episode is chock full of great character moments too, with the standout being Gohan asking Piccolo to make him a Gi just like his. Kami and Nail both point out that this causes Piccolo’s heart to skip a beat, and I know my reaction was much the same, as this request not only cute on its own merits, but also speaks to the depth of Gohan and Piccolo’s relationship. I mean, Piccolo puts it best himself when he asks Gohan if he wants a Gi like his father’s, and that is ultimately what Gohan wants, since Piccolo has long since been a better father to him than Goku ever could be.

The heartwarming, healthy relationship between Piccolo and his son is put into hilarious contrast with the somewhat manipulative relationship between Gohan’s biological parents as well. Goku and Chi Chi are not exactly cooperative in their attempts to raise their son, and this all comes to a head when Goku brings back Gohan after causing Chi Chi to miss out on a full year of his life. Chi Chi’s method of making up for that loss, while not entirely healthy, is definitely understandable, as she holds Goku to his promise of giving her another baby, one that she will hopefully not miss out on as much time with, and who Goku won’t push into his same fighting lifestyle.

Of course, I know all too well that Chi Chi’s hopes here are in vain, since their next child takes after Goku far more than Gohan ever did, but it’s still pretty clear that this is Chi Chi’s motivation in forcefully demanding privacy with her husband, and riding him until a great Kamehameha wave fills the sky.

There’s also a certain level of visible fear in Goku, but it’s the type of fear that, at least to me, is very similar to the exciting fear I get at the prospect of being… well…. overstimulated by my partner, and it’s genuinely quite funny to see, as it makes it clear that Goku absolutely does not dom, which feels perfectly congruous with his character.

Perhaps I’m reading a bit much into this, but either way, Team Four Star clearly had a lot of fun leading up to this sex scene, and all of these factors make it one of their funniest, and… stimulating, scenes yet.

Rating: 4.5/5

Critical Eye Criticism is the work of Jacqueline Merritt, a trans woman, filmmaker, and critic. You can support her continued film criticism addiction on Patreon.

[peemanne]

Yakuza 2 (2006) Review: Turning Up the Heat

i'm just copying the intro from the last one and you cannot stop me Hey, it's Pee again! So there's this site called Backloggd that's basically just letterboxd for video games and I've been writing a bunch of reviews there, with a bunch of longer ones for RGG games because of course so. I've got one currently cooking for 0 and in the meanwhile, I've decided to put them up here too, for archiving or whatever. I also get to put silly captions on them now. So with that out of the way, here's the original Yakuza 2

Also might as well plug my backloggd in here if you wanna see the rest of the stuff I've done hehehehehe

This review contains minor spoilers. Reviewed on Jul 16, 2023 Completed on the Playstation 2 (via PCSX 2) Rating: 9/10 (4.5 Stars)

I really, really liked Yakuza 2. The more I think about it, the more I just think to myself "Damn, I really really liked that one". Should probably preface this review with a little disclaimer: I've been playing these games in an odd order. Started with 0, played the original 1+2, played Like a Dragon, then Judgment, and then went to the Remastered Collection. And even after all of that, I still look back at this entry, which came so early in the franchise, and I look back at it pretty fondly.

I'll start off with the combat. I admittedly did not enjoy the original Yakuza's combat that much. It was serviceable, and laid out some great groundwork that would be expanded upon for a whole series, but ultimately Kiryu didn't feel that good to control. The janky camera definitely didn't help that much. But when I went to Yakuza 2, I could immediately feel the difference. Kiryu is as smooth as butter here. He's fast, even right off that bat. He's strong, which is made to feel even better with the immaculate sound design returning from the first game. The heat actions are really beefy feeling in this one. Yakuza 2's combat doesn't feel dated at all. It also gave us ultimate essence, which is the funniest heat action ever. Shoutout to the PS2 faxxing gif. The combat shines even more via some pretty sick boss fights. This game introduced Feel the Heat, which really adds a lot to the experience. I'd like to highlight Hayashi for this. He just randomly shows up with a LOT of health bars, a fun moveset, and 2 different phases, the second one having him RIP OUT some pipes from the wall and use them as kali sticks. And when you finally beat him down, his FTH has him backed up and stuck against the wall, and Kiryu delivers some of the most heavy feeling punches in the series. All of this added up for a super memorable fight, even though he held almost 0 story importance.

Speaking of Hayashi, Evil Itself is an amazing track that I wish they remixed for Kiwami 2. Speaking of Evil Itself, let's talk about the soundtrack. The original 2 PS2 games have a pretty unique sound compared to the rest of the series. It has this rough, harsh edge to it, and it really makes it feel like its own thing. Aside from the aforementioned Evil Itself, some pretty good stand out tracks for me are Hit & Kill, The Grudge, Bad Fortune Flower, and North Menace. Then there's A Scattered Moment, which is an amazing final boss theme. It personally makes the final boss for me, it's such a beautiful track. There's also, of course, the GOAT, Outlaw's Lullaby. One of the best regular fight themes in the series, made even better with the Kiwami remix. I love Outlaw's Lullaby so much. It's half the reason I went back to Sotenbori so much. I'd just ride the taxi just to get into street fights for no reason just to hear more Outlaw's Lullaby. I will now go listen to it again. I love it. I love it so much. I love it so mu

Anyways, the story. I understand it's definitely a love-or-hate-it kind of deal. If you've played this game before, you are DEFINITELY aware the shenanigans that occur during the finale. But in spite of all of those shenanigans, I can't bring myself to dislike this game's story. The main driving force for it is probably the main villain, Ryuji Goda. He has such a rich presence, and he absolutely steals the show whenever his mug shows up on screen. Some might call his motivations stupid, but I think they fit his character well. And especially during the later parts of the game, you only grow to like him even more. Aside from Ryuji, though, the other characters are really good too. Kiryu's characterized pretty well here, with the events of the first game still coming back to affect him. Kaoru's a pretty cool character, and her relationship with Kiryu brings out the strengths in both their characters. Plus it's just really sick fighting with her. Killer Kawara's a pretty interesting case part of the story, with his past and all coming back into the spotlight in the present. I only wish he got more screentime, but he's one of the more interesting parts of the story for me. Also Date's with him. And Date's still the goat. What a guy. Again, even with all the super goofy plot twists, I just really like Yakuza 2's story. I wouldn't say it's one of the stronger ones in the series, but I do think it still stands as a pretty decent plot with some amazing characters. I'd also just like to say that this game has one of my favorite scenes in the series, that being the one with Kiryu smoking in the rain.

Yakuza 2 surprised me as a strong entry in the series. I am of the belief that this game has barely aged at all, and I would definitely recommend it to any yakuza fan who hasn't given it a try yet. It's a very unique experience, and it's fun to see just how far this series has come, and just how strong it was even back then. Anyways listen to As a man, as a brother

[andyridgeley]

can’t stop thinkin about this letterboxd review

[musicallisto]

hi, clara! i’m starting french class next week and school.. but no one needs to hear about my panic and i was wondering what are your favorite french shows, musicals, or movies, etc? i want to surround myself with the language to hopefully be more comfortable with learning it in class and i thought going for its entertainment would be the way to go!

✧˖°࿐ ohh nixie, you did not get me started on french musicals... jk jk but first of all, good luck with french classes! and second, most of this might be intimidating at first (it was made by and for francophones, so you will probably be intimidated by the language if you're a beginner) but you will understand and learn in no time, don't worry!

➤ french shows;

this department is pretty scarce because i don't watch many french shows (mainly because i've been traumatized by a few that were very cringey, oops) but here are some i recommend/have heard are really good:

Kaamelott (2005-2009). i absolutely have to mention this one because it's more than a comedy show, it's a staple of french culture - I've yet to meet someone who's never seen at least one (1) episode. it started off as a comedy show about king arthur and his quest for the grail, but in the latter seasons evolved in a much more compelling and layered fantasy story that deals with magic, depression, and suicide. it's made by Alexandre Astier, who is kind of like our LMM except he writes plays instead of music and doesn't have ~controversies~ or whatever. also a much-anticipated (for 10 years) Kaamelott movie came out just now in theaters!

Lupin (2021-). also very famous but in a widely different register. I haven't seen it yet but only heard good things about it, and it has the merit of starring Omar Sy who is everyone's favorite actor. it's about this thief and son of a wrongfully accused man who sets out to get revenge on the rich businessman who put his father in jail, using his knowledge in forgery and theft to expose the entrepreneur's crimes, all while being inspired by French literature hero Arsène Lupin. it will give you great insight into french society today (also features a lot of useful and accurate slang) as well as really beautiful shots of Paris!

Le Bazar de la Charité (2019). a historical drama mini-series about the true event of this fire that ravaged a charity event in Paris and killed many. I haven't seen it either, though I really want to, but I've heard good things about it, and the historical accuracy is probably best since it's a show about French history written by French people. also, features Camille Lou my beloved <3

lastly, here's an article on French tv shows that you can all watch on Netflix! (though I wouldn't recommend Emily in Paris unless you want to get eczema from second-hand embarrassment, lol)

➤ french movies;

similarly to french shows, I haven't seen that many (though I have seen more) because french cinema has the reputation of being... either Not Good (read: Really Bad) or Really Pretentious And Incomprehensible. but there are some really good films that I have to mention:

first, of course, the staples of comedy that every French person has seen, and will earn you shocked gasps of "you've never seen X??????": Astérix et Obélix Mission Cléopâtre, La Cité de la Peur, OSS117, Les Visiteurs, Bienvenue chez les Ch'tis and many others... namely everything Louis de Funès has ever done. it's definitely... absurd humor or parody for the most part, because it's what we like best, but personally I think the first two movies are some of the funniest things I've ever seen so I can attest to their quality.

of course, Intouchables, which was the highest grossing French film of all time for a while and remains the most-viewed French film abroad. Also starring Omar Sy (♡), it was his breakout success actually; it tells the story of this very wealthy quadriplegic man who hires a young man from the "rough area" to be his live-in aid; you may have seen the American remake The Upside, but... nothing beats the original.

Personal recommendation here: Le Chant du Loup (ALSO HAS OMAR SY MY BELOVED!). It's a military thriller about a recruits in a submarine and especially this one soldier who is the "Oreille d'or" (gold ear) and can basically identify any enemy vessel or animal based on the sound they emit alone. it's a veeery tense film (reminded me of Nolan's work esp. Dunkirk, which is one of my favorite movies!) with high stakes that I truly enjoyed; and I have... contacts... who know people... who know stuff... can't say much more before the State finds me lol but even though some parts are very far-fetched, the military jargon and procedures are pretty accurate to the reality of a submarine!

Cyrano de Bergerac. It's the most famous adaptation of the eponymous play, which is a legend of French literature. The whole movie is in verse, taking its dialogue directly from the text of the play. 100% recommend if you're into beautiful literature, swashbuckling stories, passionate tragic romances and antiheroes. Would recommend watching this when you're more advanced in your French-learning journey, and reading the book first, because the language is dated and formal, but incredibly beautiful and it would be a shame missing out on the poetry!

a special mention for animated movies that were all of my childhood, and also that of many French people of my generation: Azur et Asmar, Kirikou et la Sorcière, Kirikou et les Bêtes Sauvages. Imo children's movies are the best way to learn your target language because they use tropes and archetypes that are easy to recognize, are often super whimsical and entertaining, and don't feature super technical concepts or vocabulary.

On a related note: Disney movies!!! I can't stress this enough: watch Disney movies in French!!! you probably know them already by heart and will learn the language super fast by learning the songs. or if you can't watch the movies, just listen to the songs. Watching Tangled in German was an amazing experience for me.

➤ french musicals;

should probably preface this by saying french musicals are scarce compared to broadway ones, because France has a culture of classic theater much more than musical theater. the songs are more poppy and less extravagant belting fests, but not any less entertaining!

Notre-Dame de Paris. Based on Victor Hugo's Hunchback of Notre-Dame, it's one of the most famous French musicals and the closest to a Broadway one I'd say. Features huge names of the Francophone musical scene in the main roles (Garou, Daniel Lavoie, Hélène Ségara and Patrick Fiori are all famous outside of their roles). the story is very famous of course but still a joy (or a pain, because it's just so sad) to follow. Most famous songs: Belle, Le Temps des Cathédrales. (Both of these have transcended the musical sphere and are well-known through all of France even by those who really despise Broadway)

The original production of Les Mis was French as you probably know, and it's worth checking out! Especially À La Volonté du Peuple, which is the original Do You Hear The People Sing? I've talked about the lyrical differences between the two versions and how they evidence different characterizations of Enjolras and Les Amis, but the truth is it's just really good in an "empowering anthem" type of way. Also I will literally never recover from Michel Sardou as Enjolras like I think that's so funny and,,,, ill-fitting but also not like asdkdjdj

Mozart, l'Opera Rock. which as the title suggests is a rock opera about Mozart's life and his rivalry with Salieri, but if Mozart and Salieri were vampires with a gay bdsm relationship lowkey. this is NOT what happens in the musical in reality but the subtext is THERE asixdjsj. the songs are ICONIC and so is the aesthetic, more than one French kid's bisexual awakening before we got Måneskin tbh. Most notable songs: L'Assassymphonie (an absolutely canonical BANGER), Tatoue-Moi, and my favorite, Le Trublion.

1789, les Amants de la Bastille. It's my favorite and it's most definitely not the best but I hyperfixated on it when I was 10 and my life has not been the same since. I mean, star-crossed lovers during the French revolution??? Hello???? Camille Lou my beloved is here (remember, from the Bazar de la Charité?), also Louis Delort on whom I had a little bit of a crush ngl. (actually had a crush on both but s: Ça Ira Mon Amour (my favorite since 2012 😔🤟), Pour la Peine, and just like. Generally all of them are bangers

Roméo & Juliette. pretty self-explanatory as to what it is about, I've never listened to all of it, just the most famous songs, but what I know from it is SO GOOD, I have this friend who is the most dedicated fan of this musical so I had to mention it. Les rois du monde and Vérone are a bop and a half! Big Broadway vibes with this one musical, with super talented singers and ensemble casts giving it their all, so I'd recommend starting with this one (or the first two I mentioned) if you don't want to feel too out of the water.

there's also Le Roi Soleil which is about the life of Louis XIV in Versailles and it's very very famous probably on the same level as Mozart or Romeo & Juliette and it has Emmanuel Moire in the lead role and I Respect and Cherish him but I never really cared for it? Je fais de toi mon essentiel is still super famous so I'm including it here and the costumes & staging are great!

I'm forgetting many (La légende du Roi Arthur, Robin des Bois...) but these are the main ones. My musicals playlist has all my musical faves, and a good proportion of them are in French! (And you will find some familiar faces in English, too.)

➤ and one last rec;

read the Little Prince.

I'm dead serious, read The Little Prince in French (which isn't the original version, funnily enough). Not only is it one of my favorite books ever, it's also one of the most well-known and widely-translated works of French literature. You've probably already read it in your native language and if you haven't, it's really easy yet incredibly poignant and full of truths about life and philosophy. I treasure this book with all my heart, and it was the first book my mom read when she was learning French. It helped a lot!

I really hope this is useful! tell me if you need anything else. and good luck! 💜

[leejeongz]

jealous treasure (asahi-junghwan)

🔅i’m gonna use another member in each one because it’s easier than making up a whole new person and explaining a bit about them for each one if that makes sense. but this is just for fun, it’s fictitious, remember that pls🔅

find the other members here

🌷 asahi:

“it’s wednesday” junkyu announced. it wasn’t out of the ordinary for him to say whatever was in his brain, but today the other boys decided to humour him a little and asked him to elaborate.

“we should wear pink” he clarified as if everyone should know. asahi rolled his eyes, you’d been pestering asahi to tell junkyu to watch mean girls since well, forever, and that now he’d finally watched it, he wouldn’t shut up about it.

“but you’re not wearing any pink” asahi pointed out after scanning his whole body.

junkyu corrected him by fetching the hoodie he was expecting to wear. it was a soft, baby pink colour, with a little heart on the pocket right in the middle. asahi recognised it straight away.

“where did you get that?” he asked. junkyu couldn’t lie, he’d been caught red handed.

“from your closet” he confessed “but you always wear it and i thought i might look cute in it, can i wear it just for one day?” he begged with pleading eyes.

“hm let me think” asahi put his hand to his chin with sarcasm written all over his face “no” he snatched it from junkyu’s hands. “why would you wear y/n’s hoodie anyway?” he asked

“i-” junkyu stuttered “i didn’t know it was theirs” he said while assessing the situation “but are you really jealous right now? i didn’t know you were the type” he laughed, drawing the attention of the other members.

“no” he scoffed, “i’m not jealous, i just don’t think that they would want you wearing their hoodie. you smell” he spat out, turning his back and heading for his room.

“someone call y/n” junkyu said, wanting you to hear what a jealous man your boyfriend really is.

“don’t you have something better to do, like finding your own pink hoodie, you know, like the one you never take off your own back?” asahi snaps back, referring to the infamous pink hoodie from junkyu’s trademark outfit. as he leaves the living room, asahi takes a hesitant sniff at the jumper, hoping junkyu hasn’t infected it with his scent so much so that it no longer smells of you.

🍄 yedam:

having been stuck inside your house for what felt like a year, you were grateful and willing to accept any invitation to leave. today’s invite came from your boyfriend, yedam, who’d recently been too busy working to come and see you, which was completely understandable. he’d asked if you’d like to join him and a few of his friends on a walk around a nearby park, you of course said yes.

with beautiful scenery came the chance to take beautiful pictures. noticing that your boyfriend was too preoccupied by the ice cream van, you asked one of his friends, jeongwoo, to take a picture of you by the fountain. he agreed and instructed you on how to pose so that it wouldn’t look awkward. you followed his advice and managed to get a few shots. you walked back over to jeongwoo, who innocently stood with your phone in his hand, when you saw your boyfriend come rushing over.

“what are you doing with their phone?” he questioned “they let you take photos of them?” he spat out in a hurt manner.

“yes…” jeongwoo replied before you stepped in.

“how much are they?” you asked, pointing in the ice cream van’s direction, not understanding what all the commotion was about.

“apparently they’re all out of ice cream” he mocked “but why did you let him take photos of you? that’s my job” he pouted with a soft tone to his voice.

“ooo our yedam is all soft for y/n” jeongwoo jeered which, judging by the look yedam gave back to him, was not appropriate. “it was just 3 pictures” jeongwoo clarified “the model isn’t that easy to work with anyway, they have no fresh ideas of their own to spice up my business” he scoffed jokingly while handing your phone back to you, causing yedam to finally crack a smile.

“⅕ stars, pictures came out wonky and the photographer is bossy, unlike my lovely yedam” you smiled, playing into the joke. it wasn’t long before yedam was back to his usual cheerful self and had also finally decided that an iced tea was a good substitute for ice cream too.

🧶doyoung:

there was a lot of things in your house that didn’t make sense, but the worst was definitely the paintings hung up in your room that you’d never gotten around to taking down, mainly because you couldn’t reach them but shhh. you’d always been too shy to ask doyoung, knowing he’d laugh at you and tease you for being too short to reach them, and given you hadn’t been together for that long, you weren’t sure how much you’d appreciate that being your first inside joke.

a friend of yours, jihoon, had come over to your house while doyoung was there, which wasn’t exactly an issue, he knew you and jihoon were friends and he respected that. the three of you often gossiped and gamed together, it was a common thing these days.

“i tell you this every time im here but those are so ugly y/n, please take them down” jihoon glanced up, locking eyes with the spooky man in the painting and shuddering.

“i can’t reach” you joked, forgetting your boyfriend was also there.

“i’ll do it then” jihoon announced, standing up and reaching each painting easily.

“i could have done that” doyoung whispered under his breath while staring at you. you turned to your left to see your boyfriend's unimpressed face. “why did you let him do it?” he questioned, seeming really quite angry.

“he offered, i wasn’t gonna say no” you defended yourself. jihoon took this as his queue to leave and take the artwork elsewhere, he didn’t know where, but anywhere was better than being in that room with you two.

“is it because of his big muscles? is it because you value his opinion more than mine?” doyoung asked, laughing at his own thoughts and how ridiculous they were but possibly true.

“no” you rolled your eyes before making eye contact again “its because he offered” you repeated.

“and if i offered?” he asked, expecting you to say that you would have declined.

“obviously i would have said yes” you replied, “they were horrible i don’t care who got them down i just wanted them gone”

“oh” he sat back and relaxed into the pillow “well i’m glad they’re gone. i didn’t like to say it, but they were creepy” he laughed with you. “the next thing to go is him though” he joked, seeing jihoon walk back into your room, which of course was replied to with a scoff from your sassy friend.

💥haruto:

your sleeping pattern was well and truly out of the window, so you decided to stay up and call one of your friends that you knew would be awake, hyunsuk. he was just like you, you both slept at 4am and woke up at 2pm, so he wasn’t that shocked when you called, wide awake like him.

“where’s haruto? wasn’t he supposed to be staying at your place tonight?” he asked, genuinely concerned about his friend. you flipped the camera to show your bed, where a certain sleepy haruto lay, peacefully entering dreamland. “he’s so cute” hyunsuk giggled, you cooed in agreeance, he really was the cutest.

you stayed on call for about an hour. you were currently laughing about the tiktok he’d just sent to you, your humour was exactly the same too so it’s wasn’t hard for you to crack the other up. all the commotion woke your boyfriend, whose bed head was clearly visible in the reflection of your opened laptop when he sat up.

“did we wake you?” hyunsuk laughed upon hearing a groan from his friend.

“we?” haruto responded in a sleepy voice. “who’s we?”

“uhh us” you pointed between you and the phone.

“y/n? hyunsuk?” he snapped out of his sleepy state quickly. “why are you two up at this time and on the phone together?” you looked at hyunsuk on the screen and smiled, trying to hold in your laughter. “turn that off and come to bed, i want cuddles, and i want you to get some sleep, unlike him” he flung himself back at the bed, only inches away from hitting his head on the headboard.

“wait for me” hyunsuk joked in a teasing tone.

“no, not you” haruto whined. “just y/n please” he smiled closing his eyes and opening his arms, ready for you to join him.

“i guess this is goodnight then” you said to hyunsuk, which haruto followed up with a goodnight for his friend too before you put the phone down.

“now, cuddles please!”

♟jeongwoo:

for jaehyuk’s birthday this year, he asked for a small gathering, just close friends, which you of course are included in since you and jeongwoo had been together for over 2 years now. when you arrived, you quickly gauged the atmosphere of the party was pretty light and fun, it wasn’t oppressive in the slightest. usually parties you attended were fully kitted out with loud music, dimly lit rooms and a bunch of strangers in every room, instead your friends were in the living room, just chatting and laughing.

“you came!” jaehyuk screeched, running over to hug you. “oh and you bought a plus one, jeongwoo” he joked around with your boyfriend, who just rolled his eyes in response.

it wasn’t long before the boys delved into the games cupboard and pulled out the “who’s most likely to” box. the oldest of the boys shuffled the cards and took the top one which read “who’s the funniest”. whenever you played, this one always seemed to come out first, so you changed your answer every time to please everyone.

you turned around your board with the name “jaehyuk” written on it. your eyes scanned the room to see almost everyone had his name written on their boards, probably because it was his party after all. you quickly diverted your eyes away, however, when you saw that jeongwoo had written your name, which should have made you feel happy but instead, you felt quite guilty for not writing his.

the game went on, and your name wasn’t written on jeongwoo’s board ever again, despite you putting his for almost everything positive. the rest of the evening, jeongwoo didn’t come near you at all, everyone noticed, everyone questioned it, it was so obvious that he was jealous, but there was no way he was admitting to it.

as you got ready to leave, you glanced over at the boy who was supposed to be staying with you tonight, sat firmly in his place on the sofa.

“jeongwoo, aren’t you coming?” you shouted from the door. “jaehyuk is staying here so you don’t have to worry about him” you teased, everyone else smiling at you and giggling silently.

“fine” he grunted. you made up on the way home, he couldn’t even remember how it all started, he just “wanted to make a point” which, sure, he did.

🌍junghwan:

you and junghwan never got to spend much time together before you became friends with the members since he was always with them or at school, which is why he’s never complained or showed any jealousy when you are with them.

today you headed over to their dorms to relax and play when you remembered, today was the day of junghwan’s english exam. you pulled out your phone and dropped him a quick good luck text before continuing your journey.

yoshi brought you up to his room where he said you could chill for a bit since everyone else was still sleeping, other than those who had school of course. yoshi began to ask you lots of questions, you learnt a lot about each other in that hour or so, and the conversation was flowing so well that you didn’t hear the door.

“y/n, you did remember?!” junghwan asked excitedly, clapping his hands while smiling from ear to ear. “you came all the way here to see me after i finished?”

“remember what?” you asked, bewildered. “your exam? yeah i sent you a text, i’m sorry i didn’t realise until i was over half way here else i would have gone to see you first” you confessed, feeling guilty. his face dropped at your honest words.

“you mean you came all the way here just to see yoshi?” he asked. “everyone else was in the kitchen, but you two were in here… alone…?” disappointed in your reasoning and forgetfulness, he slowly backed out of the room. he wanted to cry, but he couldn’t. he wanted to feel sad and upset, but did you really do anything wrong, he thought. “you couldn’t have just turned around and gone home”

“well i didn’t want to, i wanted to see my friends. i didn’t realise that most of them didn’t get up until the afternoon” you walked closer to him, praying that he didn’t try and get away. “i’m sorry i forgot about your exam”

he shuffled closer to you. you’d never argued before, and he wasn’t sure how to respond, so he hoped a hug would go down well. as he hugged you, he whispered his own apology into you hair “i’m sorry for jumping to conclusions”

[jalebi-weds-bluetooth]

Hi Dear Jalebi, I demand your analysis :)   What are your thoughts on IPKKND might have some typical track if the audience, TRP, actors departure didn't influence it otherwise? Let me explain, IPKKND was supposed to have a longer office track (that wasn't common though, I would've loved it) but the TRP was low, so Shantivan track was introduced. Then, I read that, Sana Maqbul (Lavanya) wanted to quit IPKKND, that's why the quick breakup???

Is that why they didn't give us the COMMON AF *jealousy and hero's ex GF turns villain* track? Then again, Anjali was jealous and sad about Khushi after the first reveal of Shyam, and it looked like track about Didi Ki Saut was beginning. But again ratings dropped and the fandom didn't react well (kinda protested), Anjali quickly stopped showing jealousy and Dadi was introduced to give ArShi a common saas-bahu vibe.

Hello Dear Analysis Anon!

I am going to over answer this with a lot of detail because I have a lot of thoughts, as always! Time to get into my thinking cape/coat:

This analysis is going to cover:

(1) every example you just mentioned,

(2) my thoughts on external things affecting plot of the story,

(3) things/plots/ tracks that could've been if not for external factors

Examples

1) IPKKND was supposed to have a longer office track (that wasn't common though, I would've loved it) but the TRP was low, so Shantivan track was introduced

As far as I can remember from one of the writers' interviews, the office track was cut short because this was a show on Star Plus - which, as a channel, caters to 'family audience' therefore needs to have sanskaar and stuff at its core. Hence the rude shortening of the office track and weird 'makeover' and 'desi-dying' Lavanya. And hence we had a very weird four months of an eighteen-twenty years old Khushi teaching someone about sanskaars and suddenly knowing everything about a household when Bua-ji or even Payal would've been a more apt choice for this 'tutoring'.

If this was a Star One show, they might've not shifted out of the office for the longest time!

2) Sana Maqbul (Lavanya) wanted to quit IPKKND, that's why the quick breakup??? Is that why they didn't give us the COMMON AF *jealousy and hero's ex GF turns villain* track?

I did not know that's why the quick end happened. Honestly that happened perfectly. I think Lavanya had an inkling about their relationship heading south right when Arnav told everyone he's getting engaged to her. But she chooses to not see it until one day she couldn't. Maybe we could've gotten more from La but if you see carefully, La clearly knows that this relationship is now just for face. Bless her heart for trying though, trying with a smile!

Also, again I think the writers never thought of making Lavanya a vamp. They had enough material with Arnav-Khushi's own differences, Shyam and Buaji playing enough roles to mess up Arnav-Khushi's love story. I probably think they always had planned Lavanya as a beautiful person who was unintentionally caught in all of this. I feel they planned La and Khushi's friendship - they clearly enjoyed writing two completely different people becoming closest of friends.

The writers/creators deserve full credit for this.

3) Then again, Anjali was jealous and sad about Khushi after the first reveal of Shyam, and it looked like track about Didi Ki Saut was beginning. But again ratings dropped and the fandom didn't react well (kinda protested), Anjali quickly stopped showing jealousy and Dadi was introduced to give ArShi a common saas-bahu vibe.

This is all true.

My Thoughts on External Things Affecting Plot

It's not necessarily bad that external things affect plot. Feedback, from channel or fans, can help the show to pivot and understand what is working and what's not. The problem is when feedback is implemented regardless whether or not it matches the theme of the plot.

I loved:

1) The channel moving out of the office because the power dynamic was too great and the contract terms were very unhealthy and Arnav Singh Raizada deserved to get sued at least 10 times by the end of this contract so yes, the shorter the office track the better. Literally the saving grace is they didn't "fall in love" there.

2) The fans protesting against Didi Ki Saut track. Not because I hated the track - I think it was executed in the worst manner! From identical visual languages to show Arnav-Anjali and Arnav-Khushi scenes (which didn't work to show Arnav being equally torn between the two most important women in his life, but just made the audience get creeped by Arnav-Anjali's relationship) and writing scenes of Anjali getting offended by Arnav-Khushi's intimacy/Arnav spending time with his wife, on her birthday, in his bedroom... did she expect Khushi would just *disappear* in a her and Arnav's bedroom? Like that was the worst way to show a compelling plot line and giving people some weird thoughts about Anjali-Arnav (which I hate because I LOVE Anjali-Arnav).

3) Barun walking out when the plot was literally done. Yes, thank you!

4) Barun going to do a movie led to the kidnapping track, which I liked a lot. No, not the nonsense of Manorama Bond fishing out Delhi's security camera footages in vintage recording system - but the fact that given the chasm and angst between Arnav & Khushi, only something bigger than their misunderstanding could force Arnav to give weight to his feelings and for Khushi to be able to forgive him. And his life was at stake. It was a sharp reminder to both of them that they lost so much by not communicating that it doesn't matter what they had to say - they loved each other, they just needed to get back and fight off everything together.

And then again, there are things I HATED that happened because of external factors:

1) The channel for the whole La becomes Desi. And the overdose of sanskaar and tradition that followed for a few months *uggggh* Clearly the channel demanded this from the plot because family, traditions and all are important to Star Plus (wtf are they thinking for Ghum Hai Kisi Ke? though or YRKKH?) And even the Aarav track and Mrs. India - two tracks with terrible execution - were very Star Plus recommended content. Just now Saath Nibhana Saathiya 2 had a Mrs. Surat/Gujarat track and Yeh Hai Chaahatein had a miracle child popping up...

2) The fans demanding Arnav & Khushi's proximity. The whole hut scene was *noooooo*. Lack of consent, body doubles, GLARING logical loopholes and them just trying to do it when one of them is really not in the mood and they were both so out of character. @phati-sari explains this really well in her post (just search for the hut to get all relevant posts on her blog)

3) Barun? Not exactly - he's never in control of the plot so really it's the writers that kinda know what to do with his presence and absence. Even if they get a short time, it's upto the creators who know if they use the last 2-3 weeks for stretching a random track as much as they can and give a rushed ending or quickly wrap up a crap track and give a satisfactory ending. A good example of this is Lavanya's exit - although rushed was dealt with grace, important conversations and memorable hugs. Bad one is the end of the show - I know Barun gave his papers but I wish they went the La way with the end of the show - important convos, teary hugs and a sweet moment (they tried their best tho...)

It's an ITV trend though to not plan for the end of a show... they stretch a crappy track as much as they can and have like a 2 min epilogue. Kasautii 2.0 was the funniest cause they had all misconceptions cleared, Komolika and Mr. Bajaj die and then have a weird 2 min pillow fight to show 'happy family'... guess in that way I'm glad we had whatever we did with IPKKND!

Possible Tracks Then

So if external factors didn't influence the show, we might have had the following:

1) A longer office track. It would end the way it did in canon though. I think it was prewritten that at one point Khushi would tear up the contract and hold him accountable for everything Arnav did. Just instead of 3-4 days it would've been 10-15 days after the contract.

2) Didi Ki Saut track. Honestly that was compelling if executed right. Sometimes you can have an antagonist without becoming a villain, Anjali the perfect character for that.

3) A separation track. I'm pretty sure Arnav-Khushi could have separated at some point in their six months marriage - this is just my inkling and not something I heard in an interview unlike the above two. If given full reign to writing, we probably would've gotten an angst heavy stuff at some point post marriage/6 months.

4) A remarriage track sans Dadi. We know why Dadi was introduced (honestly I didn't mind her, it was a track done well and kinda to redeem Arnav in front of the public eyes. It's a perfect track cause Arnav is 'nice' for standing up for her and kinda heals the wounds he caused in the first few months of the marriage by retorting someone who tells Khushi everything he told her...) But anyway I do think a remarriage was in the works, not because of TRPs but the way their whole 'marriage' was framed and how Khushi was broken because of the lack of everything in it. And they deserved one w/o the devastation that night brought.

5) The 'marriage' would've been a live in. Arnav and Khushi's elopement was supposed to be darker in nature*. Their 'marriage' would've had no religious nor legal validity, therefore a stark contradiction to everything Khushi stood for... but you can't have that in ITV. *By dark I don't mean sexual violence - never.*

6) The whole IPKKND was meant to be darker. I am glad for the romantic comedy though! I think their balance of angst and comedy pre marriage was perfect! Not sure post marriage because it felt like a loop of going back to square one with no progress. But I think things were meant to be less subtle, more tragic and dramatized. So I think we could've gotten extremely angsty periods post marriage with a slow, gentle lull to the romance/comedy. While I am extremely glad for the lightheartedness, I wish I could've read what the whole original concept for Arnav/Khushi was!

7) Arnav revealing the truth to Khushi would've been different. We know the distasteful suicide track quickly came as a way to push Arnav's buttons and have him confess the truth of his elopement to Khushi. And that came from Barun going away - hence the quick kidnapping track and everything. So if Barun didn't go away, I honestly don't know how the revelation would happen. Would Arnav start piecing things together from information and things about Shyam in Laxminagar? Would Arnav end up helping and hospitalizing Shashi who would tell him the truth? Would Arnav come across any hidden wedding card Buaji could've had printed for Shyam-Khushi or even Shyam's fake kundili? Given the Gupta house wasn't the place where Shyam covered his tracks... was this where Arnav would start seeing things? Or guilt ridden, would Garima/Khushi/Madhumati tell Arnav the truth? Something was meant to happen for this revelation, whether it's Arnav believing Khushi or just getting further evidence against her - I... don't know! I wish I knew what the writers had in store.

We highly appreciate for not showing a typical Nanand against Bhaabi trope, also for not making La villain, but would it result differently if things didn't have a hand? Imma cry thinking Anjali jealous and La villain! meh!  What a feast for the eyes it was to see ONLY ONE VILLAIN and less negativity in a tellywood show. Baas bohut hua my casual verbiage. By demand I mean no pressure, please take your valuable time and reply whenever you feel like it.Take Loads of Care and Chocolates your way <3

I hope the above answered all your queries :) Thank you for all the chocolates and care!!!

Phew this was rather long! A big hug to anyone who went through it! See ya later!

- Jalebi

[keepyourpantsongohan]

And Many Happy Returns

A gift for @sloaners, one of the funniest, nicest and most talented people I know. You deserve nothing but good things, so here’s something made with the wish to make you smile. Please check out the collaborative pieces by @uintuva​ @tomicaleto​ @kiro-sveta and @ohayohimawari​​. | AO3 (Art/Writing) | Podfic |

                               ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

It starts, as the best intentions often do, with a thirty-year-old man blowing out a birthday candle. 

“Happy birthday, Kakashi,” Tenzō tells him warmly. 

This warmth between them is both new and old. It aches of familiarity, and partnership, and all the things Kakashi has compartmentalized as something he ought to think about at a later date. But it is later, the moon shining down upon them in the wee hours of the night, his face bare to his companion. It’s a new world order, one where to Kakashi is the Sixth Hokage, and the village is bustling with migrants from all its neighbours, and where he lets someone look at him the way Tenzō is doing, like he has done something incredibly right. 

Kakashi wishes Obito were here to see this. He likes to think it would annoy him a little, even if this was exactly what he had suggested. 

“So how does it feel?” Tenzō asks, smiling. He sets down the cupcake, knowing Kakashi isn’t interested in sweets anyway. “Your first birthday as Hokage. This should be a day that the whole village celebrates.” 

“Maa, you know I don’t like parties,” Kakashi says, ducking his head as if a villager might pop up somewhere with a confetti canon. He reaches out and lets his fingers brush Tenzō’s. “This is fine with me.” 

Tenzō sighs, all fondness. “Well, you have to at least let me show you your birthday present.” 

Kakashi raises an eyebrow. “Oh? Did you bring something?” 

Tenzō shakes his head. “It’s more of something I get to show, actually.” 

It’s very tempting for Kakashi to make a joke at that, but his thought is soon cut off by a gleaming light in the sky, a bright blue-green speck making its way from far up above them, heading downward quite suddenly. For a moment, he thinks it could be a shooting star. Yet it doesn’t look much like a star to him, particularly not when he realizes whatever it is is hurtling not only towards the ground, but towards them. Kakashi’s mental calculations suggest that the meteor will land before they get a chance to move. 

It is all they can do to brace for impact. Kakashi feels his chakra gather in his palms and raises his hands so that he might be able to form a chidori. Beside him, Tenzō’s hands form a serpent seal and a wooden dome suddenly encloses them. A futile effort, given the speed and force of the object, but one Kakashi appreciates nonetheless. 

What surprises him, however, is when the meteor passes straight through the barrier, lands in their laps with a groan, and lets out a frustrated, “Ow!” 

Kakashi’s brain tries to catch up to the situation. They’re alive. They’re alive, and so is their meteor. Except it’s not a meteor, it’s a mint green man, who has appendages jutting out from his neck that dig into Kakashi’s thigh. Kakashi’s eyes rove over the man’s back, taking in the familiarity of what he is facing. 

“Obito?” asks Kakashi incredulously. 

“Obito?!” Tenzō repeats, his voice rising an octave. “Your Obito? Kakashi, isn’t he supposed to be dead?” 

Kakashi says, before he can think much about it, “Well, it wouldn’t be the first time.” 

In answer to their questions, Obito finally rolls over, confirming what Kakashi already knew. Obito’s face and body are the same as they were at the height of the war by all accounts. Scales, tomoe, and horns decorate his body, but what draws most of his attention are the brushstrokes painted across his stomach, reading, “Love, Kaa-san~”

A hand thrown over his eyes, Obito grumbles out, “Your mother says, ‘Happy birthday,’ Bakashi.”

—

Tenzō’s first order of business is to find out how this happened. Obito’s first order of business, as soon as he is able to stand on his own two feet, is to stare at Kakashi. 

“Wh— That’s— You’re handsome!” Obito accuses, outraged. He points his finger at Kakashi’s uncovered face. 

It’s unclear if Kakashi’s face is flushed from the impact of Obito’s words or the impact of his body flying at them from space. “Uh, thanks,” Kakashi replies weakly. 

“Can we go back to Kakashi’s mother?” Tenzō asks, waving a hand in front of them. “How many people are back from the dead?” 

“Just me, so far,” says Obito, a little defensively. “Kaguya’s immortal, so it’s not like she was dead in the first place.” 

“Kaguya,” Kakashi echoes flatly, eyes drifting up to the night sky. Tenzō’s gaze follows his, staring up at the moon, suddenly conscious of every moment he and Kakashi might have shared under the moon’s light. “My... mother?” 

Obito claps his hands together, distracting Tenzō and Kakashi from their respective existential crises. “Right! She said this would help explain.” 

Then, without preamble, Obito steps towards Kakashi, places his hands on either side of his face, and pulls him forward into a long, enthusiastic kiss. Kakashi’s hands drift upward, hovering over Obito’s sides. Though Tenzō can’t see both of Kakashi’s eyes, he does see one of them widen and shut, as a bright light pulses from Kakashi’s forehead, blowing his hair upward with an accompanying breeze. They draw apart, with half-smiles on their faces. 

“Oh,” Kakashi says, as if the situation makes any more sense. He looks at Tenzō. “Can you tell him too?” 

Obito nods. Tenzō tries not to jump when Obito leans towards him and their lips meet. As they do, Tenzō’s eyes are flooded with images, first of a woman with three eyes and long silver hair, and then of a man who looks just like Kakashi. The images flash quickly from the woman holding a small child, to passing through rips in the universe, to the remnants of Obito’s chakra being pulled into the moon. It is not unlike being awoken from a genjutsu.  

When the last memory passes before his eyes, Tenzō pulls away and says, “You know, all she said you had to do was touch us. Any reason you chose a kiss?” 

Obito’s mint green skin turns a bright shade of orange. “Hey— Well... Kakashi, help me out here.” 

“It was a pretty good kiss,” Kakashi offers in reply. “Eight out of ten, at least.” 

“Six and a half,” says Tenzō. “He bit my lip.” 

Obito grumbles under his breath, “Some people like that,” while Kakashi laughs.

—

“Remind me again why we’re staying at Yamato’s place and not yours, Bakashi?” 

Kakashi tosses a pillow at Obito, which, to Tenzō’s mild regret, he catches. “Because my place is the Hokage’s residence. Your chakra signature is too noticeable. Not to mention, the horns.” 

There’s far more intrigue in Kakashi’s last few words than Tenzō finds comforting. 

Obito and Tenzō lock eyes. “He looks at me judgementally,” Obito complains, pouting. 

“That’s because I’m judging you,” Tenzō informs him, just a little bit amused. “Consider me your rehabilitation sponsor.” 

Obito winces. “Doesn’t me dying count for something?” 

Tenzō regards Obito speculatively, weighing the consequences of an honest answer. Strangely enough, the man seems sincere. One of the orbs floating by Obito’s head brushes against Tenzō’s cheek, like a sulking cat seeking attention. “No,” says Tenzō, this time smiling outright.

Tenzō brings his attention back to Kakashi. He roots through one of his utility pouches, and shortly deposits what he finds into Kakashi’s palm. “This was supposed to be a gift for you,” Tenzō explains. “But now I suppose it makes more sense to give it to both of you.” 

“A key,” Kakashi observes, turning the wood over between his fingers. His mask, now back in place, doesn’t fully hide the flush creeping up. 

Tenzō nods, and with a few hand seals, a duplicate is in his hands. “I like my house the way it is,” he tells Obito, closing his fist over it. 

Without waiting for a reply, Tenzō crosses the room to head upstairs. Aside from Kakashi and Obito likely needing their own moment to speak, he feels the beginnings of a headache forming behind his eyes. 

As his feet reach the third step, he hears Obito say, “What am I supposed to do with that?” 

“You might try being helpful,” Tenzō calls out from the stairwell. 

—

Obito decides to take Yamato—Tenzō, as Kakashi keeps calling him—seriously. He spends the next morning in Tenzō’s kitchen helping out. The fridge doesn’t have everything he needs, but he saves time by going out into the garden and encouraging some of the fruits to grow with his mokuton. Food hasn’t been a necessity for Obito for a few years, so he takes care in arranging it, hoping that if it isn’t tasty, it’s at least well-presented. 

Obito is attempting to place seaweed on rice in an appreciable impression of a cat’s ears when Tenzō comes to stand beside him. 

“Is this for Kakashi?” 

“This one is for you,” Obito says, gesturing. “The other one is for Kakashi. His box has a rabbit.” 

Tenzō eyes crinkle at the corners. Obito is beginning to recognize the motion for what it is, a reflection of the way Kakashi smiles, when the mask is in place. “Thank you. I can bring it to him, if you want.” 

Obito mulls over the offer. “We can go together.” 

“I don’t know if that’s—“ 

Obito closes the box, and uses his free hand to wave off Tenzō’s concerns. “Don’t worry about it. It’s too early for him to have any visitors. Besides, I want to see if he really wears those robes like Old Man Third.” 

Tenzō shakes his head. “How are you planning to pass through the village unnoticed?“ 

Obito taps his temple, right beside his sharingan. “Kamui,” he says, both an explanation and a warning. 

“Obito—”

In one fluid motion, Obito tucks a bento box in the crook of his arm and grabs Tenzō’s elbow to yank him forward. Moments later, they stand in front of Kakashi, who looks surprised but pleased. 

“What brings you two here?” 

“Your lunch,” Obito declares, sliding the box across his desk. 

Kakashi rests one elbow on the desk, leaning his head on his palm. “What’s the occasion?” 

“I didn’t give you a gift,” Obito says, and then freezes. 

At once, both he and Kakashi realize what Obito has said. Kakashi is looking at him the same way he did the night before. His stricken look and doubt from the war is gone, replaced by something warmer and softer. Obito feels his face heat up. 

“There’s nothing you need to give me,” Kakashi says quietly. He hasn’t stopped looking at Obito. 

“I want to,” Obito tells him honestly. It feels freeing to say it. 

Kakashi finally breaks their gaze. “That’s good to hear,” is what he says, reaching for the bento box. Their fingers brush. 

Though Obito can feel Tenzō looking at them, he finds himself distracted in Kakashi’s face. The war feels only like yesterday to Obito, but he can see new lines on Kakashi’s face that hadn’t been there before. Lines beside his eyes to accompany his smile, a tan line peeking up from where his mask has not sat evenly on his face, and a line between his brows that reminds Obito he is standing in front of the Sixth Hokage. 

“Kakashi, I—”

What Obito is going to say, even he cannot predict, but he is spared from answering by the door to Kakashi’s office suddenly bursting open. 

“Sakura, Sai,” Kakashi greets the two teenagers casually, as if there is not a six-foot-tall formerly dead rogue ninja in his office. “What’s going on?” 

Sakura stares, disbelief written on her face. “I could ask the same question.” 

“It’s a long story,” Tenzō says, raising his hands in a warding gesture. 

The boy, who must be Sai, blinks, looking oddly unaffected. “Kakashi-sama, is this some kind of test?” 

“Would you believe it if I said yes?” Kakashi asks.

Sakura gives him a withering look. “Not even a little bit.”

Though Sakura is the one Obito expects to be gawking at him, given that she was present when he died, her ire is directed towards her teacher. It is Sai who looks at him with focused curiosity. Well, Obito supposes people don’t encounter a jinchuriki with his appearance every day. “If you have something to ask, just say it,” Obito tells him.

“Why aren’t you wearing a shirt?” Sai inquires seriously. He has a sketchpad in his hands, as if he were intending to take notes. 

“Why are you alive?” Sakura asks, reasonably. 

“It was Kakashi’s birthday yesterday,” he explains, before Tenzō grabs his arm and phases them both through the wooden floor. 

—

“Just stay put for now,” Tenzō demands, when they arrive in his back garden. “We’re lucky it was those two. If Sasuke or Naruto were in the village right now, there would’ve been much more of a scene.” 

Obito sits down on the engawa, feet sinking into the grass. “I was just helping out,” he says, shrugging. 

Tenzō takes a seat beside him. “Help less obviously.” 

“Kakashi wouldn’t take my apology,” Obito replies quietly. He brushes his fingers over a dandelion, letting it grow taller and wilder in his grasp. “But he would take my lunch. I know he still has thoughts about my past, but he won’t say anything about it. He just keeps looking at me like...” 

“...He’s happy that you’re alive?” Tenzō suggests. “He is. Believe me, he doesn’t look at just anyone like that.” 

“He looks at you like that.” 

Though his expression doesn’t change, Obito doesn’t need a sharingan to pick up the redness in Tenzō’s cheeks. “It’s complicated.” 

“Am I complicating it?” Obito asks sincerely. 

“A little,” Tenzō admits, to Obito’s surprise. The other man chuckles. “But I think you’d be complicating it whether you were alive or not. And I like to see him happy.” 

The words make Obito’s stomach tighten in a pleasant way. He takes a moment to take stock of his companion. It is easy enough to see what Kakashi sees in him, in his honest feelings, determination and loyalty. It makes Obito wonder if they can make whatever this is work after all. 

“I’m sorry for what happened during the war,” Obito tells him. “For what I did to you. I know what it’s like to be used. It doesn’t change anything, but—”

“It does,” Tenzō interjects calmly. “It helps.” 

Obito wants to say something more, but both of them turn their attention to the woods, feeling a familiar chakra presence rushing at them at full speed. 

“That’s not...” 

“It is,” Tenzō confirms. “Well, this was bound to happen eventually.” 

With that, a green blur rolls straight past Tenzō’s wards and jerks to a halt right at the edge of Tenzō’s property. “Yamato, my youthful friend!! Is it true that you and my rival are now living together in hot-blooded cohabitation?” 

“Does he really not notice me?” Obito mutters. Tenzō kicks him. 

“Not exactly, Gai,” Tenzō calls out. “He’s free to come and go as he pleases.” 

Gai, who looks every bit as energetic as ever, pushes his wheelchair closer to them. “Yosh!! Just like Kakashi!” Gai replies. “He wants to train harder before taking that next step.” 

When he is at arm’s length from the house, Gai turns his stare to Obito, narrowing his eyes with a concerned frown. 

“Hey Gai,” Obito says, waving. 

Gai lets out a thoughtful hum. “Yamato, your comrade seems... familiar. Have we met before?” 

“Seriously?!” Obito exclaims. 

This time, Tenzō elbows Obito. “Gai, I’m not sure if he looked like this that last time you saw him, but this is Obito. He's come back from... somewhere.” 

Gai’s smile fades. The seriousness in his expression looks out of place. “I see.” 

Obito takes a deep breath, and stands up. He bows his head a little, half in contrition and half because he thinks Gai would rather not look at him. “I’m sorry. Kakashi told me that Naruto’s friend, the Hyuga boy, was your student. I know that doesn’t change what I did, but you deserve to hear me say it. I wish I could bring him back—”

“Neji?” Gai interrupts him, his voice shaky. 

Obito offers one quick nod. “Yes, if I could’ve done things differently, I would—”

“Neji,” says Tenzō beside him, sounding shocked. “Obito, what did you do?”

It surprises Obito that Tenzō hasn’t already heard this story from Kakashi. He lifts his head to reply, when suddenly he catches sight of the source of their surprise. Standing beside Gai, unscathed, is the Hyuga boy who Obito had certainly impaled with mokuton. 

“Gai-sensei?” Neji asks, stepping unsteadily towards his teacher. “What happened?” 

“Neji!” Gai says again, pulling his student down into a tight hug. Gai’s eyes are full of tears, but his grin is blinding. “You’re alive!” 

“Not if you keep crushing me like this,” Neji wheezes, but he returns his teacher’s embrace, pressing his face to Gai’s shoulder. Some of the weight in the air finally lifts off, and for a moment, there is peace. 

And then the moment passes. Tenzō’s hand comes down firmly on Obito’s shoulder, turning them to face each other. “Obito,” he repeats soberly. “What did you do?” 

“I didn’t do it on purpose,” Obito yelps. “All I said was that I wish I could take back what I’d done to the Hyuga kid—”

Tenzō eyes him doubtfully. “And that was all it took? Listen, I wish that I could bring Asuma back, but that doesn’t mean he’s going to show up at our next Mahjong game.” 

Obito wishes this level of suspicion was unwarranted, but he supposes his track record is less than stellar. “I don’t know what happened, alright? If you don’t believe me, ask the kid.” 

“Neji,” Tenzō asks, with far more patience in his voice than he had with Obito, “what’s the last thing you remember?” 

“The war,” Neji says, finally escaping Gai’s hug. He thinks for a moment, and then frowns. “And then some strange woman who claimed she knew Kakashi-sensei.” 

Obito and Tenzō look at each other. And somehow, from across the village in the Sarutobi District, the wind carries out three piercing screams. 

—

When Kakashi gets to Tenzō’s place that night, Obito is already fast asleep on the sofa, sitting up straight with his mouth wide open. One of the orbs that is always surrounding him bumps against Kakashi’s hand, not unlike Kakashi’s ninken do to greet him. Tugging the blanket over Obito’s shoulders, Kakashi smiles. “You’ve made a lot of paperwork for me, you know,” he tells his sleeping friend. Obito mumbles something in reply unconsciously, and Kakashi ruffles his hair, sighing. 

“You can’t give him all the blame,” Tenzō points out, emerging from the kitchen with his hands on his hips. “It’s a full moon this week. Strange things tend to happen.” 

Kakashi laughs. “You, defending Obito? It didn’t take him long to win you over.” 

Tenzō approaches him, settling a hand between Kakashi’s shoulder blades, a soothing warmth. “Only on a trial basis.” 

Kakashi closes his eyes. “You realize, as Hokage, I oversee all shinobi trials.” 

He feels Tenzō laugh at his back, the hand drifting to his side. “Maybe Obito was right, this system is corrupt.” 

“You can admit that you’re enjoying having him around, Tenzō,” Kakashi baits, tugging him towards the sofa. 

“I find his absurdity disarming,” Tenzō confesses. “It’s similar to how I feel around you sometimes, actually.” 

Kakashi pulls Tenzō down so that he can sandwich himself between the two mokuton users. “I’ll choose to take that as a compliment.”  

Tenzō leans on Kakashi, just as Kakashi leans on Obito. “You would.” 

Obito opens one eye. “You shouldn’t talk about me like I’m not here,” he mumbles, through a yawn.

“Go back to sleep,” Kakashi says, patting him on the cheek. 

For once, Obito listens. And so, tangled on the sofa is how they find themselves the next morning, when all three of them awake to a glowing purple egg gleaming innocently on Tenzō’s coffee table. 

[nbrook29]

💞 My ultimate Sobbe fic recs 💞

Recently, I have gone through Robbe/Sander tag on ao3 and I decided to compose a list of fics that are absolute gems for me. A few disclaimers first:

✔ I didn’t include works in progress (WIPs), however I did include fics that are only on tumblr

✔ the order of the fics below is random

✔ this is the list of my personal favorites so if your favorite fic is not on the list it doesn’t mean it’s bad or that I consider it bad - we just vibe with different things :)

✔ if there’s a fic on this list that you decided to give a shot and loved it, please remember about leaving a comment under it to let the author know that

✔ I’ve been trying to add the “read more” thingy but it doesn’t show, I’m sorry, I know long posts are annoying af

under 1k

we’re keeping it simple by noobishere | G

Summary: Sander comes over unannounced and attacks Robbe’s very person (a.k.a the one where Sander teases Robbe on Eenvoud)

This is a guaranteed mood lifter. It’s short, sweet, to the point, and oh so funny. The banter. And I’d die to see that in the show. 

1k - 5k

Fizzy Colas by Foxsake5 | M

Summary: Let’s say this is a clip (hopefully not as short as the standard 1:40 of this season) with Sander as the main on a ‘bros night out’ 🍻

This author is my queen/king alright? They take a simple idea and turn it into the most lovely/cute/soft story. This fic is exactly that. Sobbe’s chemistry here is out of this world and the banter is to die for.

high for this by flowersmaze (@bowieskam) | G

Summary: In which Sander remains a Flirt™ and in love with Robbe even when he can’t feel his face after a medical procedure

The summary says it all. Loopy Sander is the cutest and funniest thing.

Pull Me from the Dark by TheOceanIsMyInkwell (@theoceanismyinkwell) | T

Summary: Sander discovers that Robbe has recently been prescribed antidepressants, and Robbe opens up to him about the night he almost stepped off the bridge. Only love will show how much they’ve grown and pull them through.

This time, the boys talk about Robbe’s mental state which is unusual in fics. This oneshot is communication 101. And this line is just 👌🏻 “But after the dust of their first kiss and their first vows of commitment settled around them, Robbe took a look at the space in which he floated and realized, somewhere along the line, that finding the love of your life doesn’t fix you.”

diminuendo by noobishere

Summary: Waking up feels like an ordeal. His eyes are heavy, arms a dead weight, he isn’t sure if his limbs are even in the right places, but eventually, Sander comes to. (a.k.a a take on how Sander fairs after Robbe left for school.)

Sander’s POV after Dinsdag 7:27. It’s a great insight into his headspace during that time. This could be a scene in the show because it fits so well.

you’re wonder under summer sky by nothingbutniall | M

Summary: Two city boys go camping. What could go wrong? (Everything, apparently.)

Those boys are a chaotic mess okay? They’re such dorks. This fic has the best kind of grumpiness there is and sobbe is written so in character here.

if we can make it through december (maybe we’ll make it through forever) by nothingbutniall | G

Summary: Robbe and Sander at the Christmas market.

Can you imagine those two dorks at the Christmas market? Well you don’t have to anymore because this fic is everything you need and more. And this line “Couldn’t,” Sander sulks. “You can’t hold hands properly with mittens on.” makes me go all gooey inside every.single.time 😍

A New Sunday Feeling by Foxsake5 | M

Summary:  Sander before Robbe: Ugh, Sundays 😒 Sander after Robbe: 😏🥺🥰

The way this author writes sobbe’s intimate moments is just pure talent. They have such way with words.

memories painted with much brighter ink by nothingbutniall | G

Summary: Saint Nicholas is the perfect excuse for an evening of gifts and banter with the flatshare. (Basically all five of them being cute together, and then Robbe and Sander being cute with just the two of them.)

This is the perfect fic for an October evening, when Christmas is just around the corner and you’ve just made yourself a cup of coffee and want to read some heart-warming well-written christmassy fluff. 

5k - 10k

Let’s Dance by msleviss (@sander-driesen) | G

Summary: Robbe and his friends go to a club to check out Amber’s DJ cousin.

THIS PERSON PREDICTED DJ SANDER Y’ALL. And Robbe thirsts over him. And there is an instant connection. And Robbe dances. And it’s so cute.

video phone by tokyometropolis (@luludemauryyy) | E

Summary: AKA OH MY GOD, THEY WERE QUARANTINED…except not together, because life is cruel. Thankfully it’s 2020 and when Robbe has an…er…intense dream about Sander in the middle of the night, all he has to do is press one button and Facetime him about it. Thing is…sometimes FaceTiming isn’t enough.

Look. I get that smut fics are not everyone’s cup of tea. And that’s totally fine. But. If you’re looking for a well-written smut that’s in character and where you can feel the love between the characters, this is it. Hands down. Sorry not sorry 💁🏼‍♀️

10k - 20k

our camp of dreams by robbesanderx (@robbesdriesen) | M

Summary: a summer camp!AU where robbe and sander are both co-counselors

Misunderstandings lead to pining. Teenage angst at its finest. I really like camp stories, it’s my thing.

Falling For You by silver_etoile (@azozzoni) | T

Summary: Robbe only knows one thing about football: that Sander Dreisen is the hottest player on the FC Utrecht team. When Jens drags him to a match, the last thing Robbe expects is to meet someone so perfect, and it’s all he can do not to mess it up, but will he succeed?

Sobbe in a different setting with a bit different dynamic yet still having that special something. It’s a nicely written story of the development of their relationship, first meeting, falling in love, ups and down, all the best things in fics. And Sander as a soccer player is a pretty 🔥 concept (and I think Robbe agrees).

This isn’t our first time around by noobishere | E

Summary: One moment they are in the kitchen of their shared apartment, the next, they’re in this strange but familiar room.(a.k.a the au in which they accidentally go hopping through multiple universes)

The universe takes matters into their own hands and shows those silly boys that they are meant to be. Sign me up for the ride.

Coffee and Croques by peaceoutofthepieces (@peaceoutofthepieces) | G

Summary: Sander works at the on-campus coffee shop with Eliott, and he might just have a crush on the cute boy in the brown coat.

I’m a sucker for coffeshop fics. There is just something so good about them. This one is the coffeshop!AU that sobbe deserves. Oh the pining, and the secretive looks, the silly boys, and a pinch of Elu. Me likey ☕

The finest of the meadow by allforyoumylove | M

Summary: The universe brings two lonely boys together in a flowering meadow. They fall for each other fast and hard among delicate daisies, warm summer breezes, and shooting stars.

This is magical. My comment on the work was “So soft, so beautiful, so THEM, ugh.” and I MEANT that. This is just the right amount of sweetness. This is a must read. I’m not messing around. 

two side of the same coin series by MajorAccent (@acespaceacepilot) | E

Summary: the valleys and mountains of sander’s bpd

How the boys handle Sander’s ups and downs. Robbe being the best boyfriend ever. I love how good he is for Sander, being there for him, not treating him like a baby, and not controlling him. How much he tries to make it at least a little bit easier for him. If you don’t want to read explicit stories, at least give the first part a try since it’s not E rated. 

Zaterdag 9:58 by Foxsake5 | M

Summary: What happened after the croissants dropped to the floor 🥐🤭💕

I meant it when I said Foxsake5 has great way with words. Every single piece of theirs is just “chef’s kiss”. This fic is a definition of a domestic fic. Oh, and it happened. Totally. It’s my headcanon now.

its an unrequited love by eggsntoast | G

Summary: Sander works part-time at a museum every Sunday. Robbe is a frequent visitor.

A Sander POV fic. I was sold from the beginning. The development of their relationship here is so cute, and they’re being so stupid with their pining instead of just talking to each other and you just want to shake them but at the same time you’re rooting for them so hard. Oh and did I mention pining?

20k+

Jij Verliest series by ravenbrenna09 (@djsander) | M

Summary: For the past three months, Robbe’s life—and what it once was—had been stripped away and rearranged. Now, if anything, his life had become a bit repetitive: homework, stream, ignore Thomas’s Instagram, repeat. But one Friday evening, Robbe meets a hurricane in the form of a platinum-haired tattoo artist who just might show him everything that he’s been missing.

This is a long series okay? But oh so worth it. It’s captivating and you don’t want to stop until you finish. And once you finish you’re sad it’s over even though you’ve just spent 8 fucking hours reading it. It’s amazing. But you probably know that because it’s quite popular (rightfully so). The best thing is that you expect it to go bad halfway through because it’s difficult to keep the quality on the same level in a fic that long. But it doesn’t.

Visitations by lucidpantone (@lucidpantone) | E

Summary: Does Robbe and Sander’s relationship survive into adulthood. This fic takes place in two simultaneously timelines: the past and the present.The present occurs in one entire day. Both timelines are completely out of chronological order. Everything is in clips.You can be dropped in at anytime of the day in any timeline. So clip by clip you will need to piece together what happen to Sander & Robbe and why the present looks the way it does and what happened in the past that got them there.This love story is a journey. So be prepared.In the words of one of our Even’s. It’s a complicated love story between complicated people.

This is not a regular fic. The author put so much thought into it, there are so many gems, so many little things that you have to pay attention to because it.all.matters. And there is not one interpretation. Don’t you just love when a story forces you to think and use your brain? Cause I do. Not gonna lie: this story hurts, and like the author says themselves, it’s a journey. But oh my god get in because it’s amazing. And the ending is just sjsjsjsjsddhdhsdsgdsg 🤯

the night we met by themoongirl (@dearsander) | T

Summary: Robbe Ijzermans has a brain that won’t let him sleep, a chest that feels far too heavy and thoughts that never stop.During his first year of college he meets Sander Driesen. Robbe finds what he never went looking for.

A college AU. This fic is a journey of pain and fluff and humor. It has awesome friendships. And sobbe falling in love. And liminal spaces. I read it a while ago so I don’t remember it as well as the others but you know what? I still remember that it was great and I’m lowkey happy I don’t remember it that well because now I can go and read it again. 

The Stars Look Very Different by @peaceoutofthepieces 

Summary: Robbe is bored. He’s bored of listening to his friends talking about girls, and his other friends making out, and no one ever doing anything. He’s tired of having to put in all the work, of making his own fun. He’s tired of feeling nothing so he doesn’t have to feel like nothing. His party stunts are pushing the limit, his thrill seeking beginning to worry even his friends, and his carelessness is toeing the line of dangerous.

He’s a little tired of being ‘dangerous’, too.

Sander may or may not have a crush on the older boy with the apparent death wish. He wouldn’t mind a little danger.

Once I started reading this fic, each day I was waiting for an update at the edge of my seat which was a feeling I expected from s4 that did not deliver. TSLVD definitely delivered. My favorite sobbe social media AU

Ziggy Stardust Series by skamsnake (@skamsnake) | M/E

A collection of fics taking place throughout the season. Most of them are E rated so be aware of that but it’s a really cool mixture of fluff and spice *fans myself*

[deerixiie]

APPRECIATION POST!!

june 29th, or a little more that 6 months ago i posted my first fic. that was honestly the best decision of my life because tho tumblr is a hellsite it’s a hellsite that got me through a hellish year. i just want to come out and express my extreme gratitude for all of the people who have gotten me through 2020.

my followers. i remember when i first hit 100 and i was so excited bc 100 ppl in the world actually appreciated my writing enough to follow me...and then more of you guys started coming and sent sweet asks and suddenly i felt so loved 🥺 i didn’t expect to gain the following i did on this hellsite but i did and i love you guys so much :( thank u so much for being here through it all and making this year so much better!!

character anons/other anons; i know i don’t have much and not all of u are active but you!!! you guys are the bestest people on earth!!! shoyo, haji, yams, and all my noya anons,,, i love u guys sm. seeing you in my inbox made me so happy and i loved interacting w you 🥺💗 i hope you guys have an amazing new year and i hope you can talk more soon!! same goes for my other anons, 💜, 🍁, iara, and all the other anons that have send me asks, i love you guys so much!! getting anons and asks was something that made me feel so appreciated and important and seeing your asks always made my day!! ily guys <3

@sa-suga, @neonghxst, @sanso, @starrysamu, @stelleum, @myelocin, and a whole bunch of others writers; you are the most amazing people on the planet. writing on a site like this that gives little to no appreciation is so amazing of you :( your fics have made me smile, laugh, cry, and even grow as a person and i’m so grateful for that! bc of u i was able to distract myself from all the crappy things that happened this year. ily guys so much!

and now, my mutuals!!

@hajiimes; cola i will always always start with you. my closest friend, writing genius, someone i can bounce ideas off of, ask for help, watch movies with, voice call for hours with, and simp over characters with. getting close with you was one of the best things of this year and i really appreciate you for it. its really refreshing to have such a close friend i can really turn to and talk to about stuff that’s bothering me and i know i do it a lot and i’m a terrible friend sometimes but you’re always there for me :( and yeah we tease each other a lot and you’re honestly so annoying sometimes but yeah it’s fun and i love you so <3 STOP MAKING BREAKUP PLAYLISTS OKAY IM SORRY

@sugakuns + @suikazura + @kageyuji + @miyasangel + @giorvanna + @sophiawithstars + @hajiimes; i literally could not have gotten through 2020 without dinonet. it’s the first discord server and probably only discord server that i’ve really felt at home in because you all are so accepting and sweet. your support and love and kindness have gotten me past this year. i’ve been able to laugh and scream and vent and word vomit and be myself because of you all and i’m so appreciative of that. i cant wait for an entire new year with you all, ilysm!

@mehreya; you changed your url and i freaked tf out but ANYWAYS HEYYY~ rae i literally. i literally love you so much like. where would i be without you? you’re so welcoming and comforting and i love you so much :( if there’s anyone i’d share a deformed braincell with, it’s with you!! i feel like i can relate to you?? so much?? i literally keysmash in your inbox sending like 12 messages and i don’t have to worry about you getting upset because you do the same thing right back. we share really similar interests and you’re so compassionate and sweet and ugh i’m gna cry ily

@suikazura; bae i. how do i even say this. you’re literally the kindest, sexiest, funniest, loveliest person i’ve ever met. when i had a really bad day and broke down you were there to hype me up and tell me such wonderful things that i still think about all the time. you wrote a poem comparing me to the sun. ME?? THE SUN?? sui i don’t even know where to go with this ive never had someone do that for me and you doing that just makes me tear up and i’m tearing up writing this- and i love your humor so much despite the fact that it haunts me to this day and your art is so pretty and i could look at it for hours. like man i can’t believe someone like you exists i don’t deserve you at ALL. ilysm bubs

@cavalree; AZZIE WE HAVENT EVEN TALKED THAT MUCH BUT OUR CONVERSATION YESTERDAY WAS >>> THIS IS ME SAYING WE SHOULD TALK MORE WE HAVE A LOT IN COMMON

@fairyoomi + @luvromis + @rilacry; we’ve been moots for So Long but i have no idea what to talk about w u so i get intimidated and don’t talk :( ily guys so much though, you’re really sweet and kind and your humor is literally top tier. this is so weird to say but reading ur self-ship posts makes me so happy bc i feel like i can be open about my self-ship too,, it rlly comforts me and makes me feel loved hehe. i miss talking to u guys even though it was barely anything and i rlly hope 2021 is the year we get closer!!

@sophiashortcake + @star-puff + @kurooskult; we’ve recently become mutuals but i love your vibes!! i really hope i get to interact with you more next year so we can become closer <3

@bunx; BIG SIS!! literally i feel so bad for not talking to u because you’re literally the blueprint :( i just don’t know what to talk about and then get all freaked out XBSKSJD i’ve stared at your disc so many times debating what to say cbsjs but anyway thank you so much for being here from the beginning! i know for a fact ill wouldnt be where i am today w/out u 🥺 ilysm bubs

other moots that made this year so much more beautiful i want to get closer too!: @haikoo, @4fterh0urs, @run-004, @sugasugawarau, @s4ijoh, @gg9183, @baeshijima 🥺💗💗, @kozu-mei , @kaguol ily all so so much, you all are such amazing ppl and i hope we get to talk more!!

[sheepfulsheepyardinspace]

Do you have any Star Wars fanfic recommendations, or have a link to someone else's list? I really wanna veg out.

oh my god, DO I. this may have been the best ask in the world. i’m not really sure what u want a feel for, so i threw together some of my favorite longfics for maximum veg time from the ot/pt and links for swr and swtcw recs. they’re pretty much all luke-anakin/vader centric, since that’s kinda my bread and butter.

let’s start with frodogenic, who wrote the first longfic i ever read in sw and might be one of the funniest authors ever. they once reviewed my fanfic & i nearly cried from joy. anyway. 

The Father, 284k+, complete. “Ten years after ROTS, tormenting nightmares of his unborn child drive Darth Vader to extraordinary measures with unexpectedly drastic consequences. Clearly, experience has taught Darth Vader nothing...” 

this is my og star wars fic and boy oh boy is it amazing. i will never get over this. i don’t want to spoil anything but when i say the final chapters are great? i mean they’re legendary. sometimes i still think about them & wish upon a star that i could be such a great writer. vader’s amazing, han is spectacular, and the ocs are fantastic.

Far More Than Rubies, 70k+, complete. “Nine years after AOTC, tragedy revisits the Lars Homestead. Little Luke Skywalker is suddenly plunged into chaos as the rebel movements discover a secret military project that may make a crucial difference in the war with the Empire.”

the spiritual twin of The Father, FMTR takes a look at padmé’s character and relationship with both luke and anakin/vader that’s hard to beat. it’s darker and heavier than The Father, but it hits those same sweet, sweet emotional beats while raising the age-old question: if padmé had lived, what would she have done?

The Family Tree, 12k, complete. “In which Luke Skywalker is stranded in a tree waiting for a flash flood to recede. Too bad he's got company...”

okay, i admit, this isn’t a longfic, but it is a longshot, and it’s amazing. the imagery and description always blow me away, and the interaction (canon-compliant) between luke and vader just [chef’s kiss] get me. vader’s in full, glorious form, and it makes it all the harder when luke wrestles with the knowledge that vader is his father.

Sibling Revelry, 25k, complete. “After Bespin and before Endor, Darth Vader is shocked to discover that Luke and Leia are twins. He's even more shocked when Imperial Intelligence reports that Organa and Skywalker are, erm, a tad closer than previously suspected.”

this is complete crack and humor in the best way possible. it’s crack treated entirely seriously, and you will be in stitches, i promise. no matter how many times i’ve read this i break down.

KittandChips (@kittandchips) writes what i can only describe as food for the soul. the luke-vader interaction is insanely amazing, the world building of daily imperial life and imperial governance is amazing, and vader just has a special je ne sais quoi that u must read to understand––tragic, funny, and so, so fatherly. they’re currently rewriting the Force Bond Series to fit in with newer canon, so i will joyously binge reread the entire again (including the new Force Bond: Mustafar Weekend).

Force Bond 1: Orphan, 47k, complete. “After Owen and Beru are killed by a mysterious stranger, young Luke ends up as an orphan on Coruscant. It's a race against time as Obi-Wan struggles to find Luke before Vader realizes the boy is his son.”

Orphan kicks off the series, which tracks vader and luke’s relationship through the perils of luke’s teenagerhood while growing up under the eye of the emperor and imperial court. it’s filled with slow growth, struggle and misunderstandings as darth vader tries to single parent, and pay off in every installment. the entire series clocks in around 777k+ and is the most joyful, fulfilling reading you’ll ever have. promise.

darth-nickels (@darth--nickels) writes darker, twistier, and terribly, terribly heartwrenching aus. they’ve got a whole host, but let me introduce to my two favorites. also, check out their faux-academia on vader. it’s amazing and i love it, but i admit i am an academia hoe.

Dooku Captured, Pt 2, 16k, complete. “Dooku is taken alive onboard the Invisible Hand, and Sidious' web is torn. The Sith Lord wonders if death might have been preferable to clumsy interrogation by Anakin Skywalker.”

Dooku Captured is a longshot au told from Dooku’s pov which takes the beginning of ROTS and throws it on its head. it’s a fascinating outside perspective of anakin and obi-wan’s relationship and such and interesting examination of dooku’s psyche and especially his complex relationship with the jedi order, qui-gon, yoda, and palpatine. i cannot rec this one enough.

Black Mirror, 90k, incomplete. “The Ghost crew returns to the Lothal when they hear the Empire is investigating the Jedi Temple there. They learn Vader is alone and decide to take him out-- but what they find could change the course of Galactic history.”

Black Mirror diverges into swr territory, but make no mistake: this is entirely an examination of vader and, later, obi-wan as well as ahsoka. luke makes his appearance later in the game, and boy oh boy will you love luke’s portrayal is a microcosm of luke and vader’s relationship within canon. heed the tags, though.

jerseydevious ( @jerseydevious ) is, first and foremost, one of my favorite people on earth. secondly, though, she’s an amazing writer with a deep understanding of vader’s character and psyche, a flair for beautiful depictions, and the true ability to wring every emotion out of your body.

Two and a Half Men (with a baby), 13k, incomplete. “After a long day of bargaining with Hutts and attempting to ignore his past, Darth Vader is nearing the end of his rope. When he discovers his two-year-old son, it's the straw that breaks the semi-rational Sith Lord's back; in a rash act worthy of the Skywalker name, he scoops his son into his arms, steals a shuttle from his own fleet, and punches in random hyperspace coordinates to a destination on the other side of the galaxy. Unfortunately, father and son are not the only ones on the ship.”

Two and a Half Men will stick with you, dude. like no other. i promise. it’s a whirlwind ride with obi-wan, vader, and piett and as funny as it is heartbreaking. it touches on some heavy issues and doesn’t shy away from looking at the damage done to vader––again, heed the tags.

Helioseismology, 4k, complete. “Luke gets shot down on a supply run and caught in an ice storm. It's extremely lucky that his father followed him there.“

i’ll admit. im completely biased about this one because it was a birthday gift to me and i am sucker for litcherally anything when jd puts pen to paper, but believe me when i say you will be awed by the depth and tangled relationships between these luke and vader that jersey can illustrate in a stroke of the paintbrush. im love. always.

izzythehutt ( @izzythehutt ) i am blown away by the intricate dialogue and characterization, always. and the latin puns? im sold. im also a sucker for latin puns, but that’s a story for a different time.

In Loco Pirates, 34k, complete. “A down-on-his-luck Hondo Ohnaka manages to capture the unicorn of all bounties--Luke Skywalker, which sends Darth Vader, Lord of the Sith, on a painfully familiar trip to the planet Florrum to collect his prize. The failed negotiations leave Vader in the awkward position of being stuck in a besieged pirate bunker, trying to balance keeping his wayward child safe (and in his custody) with controlling the tongue of a loose-lipped pirate who--to the surprise of no one--has a bad habit of telling 'amusing' anecdotes from the Clone Wars.”

hondo, aka the best character of swtcw, is brought to life just as vividly on paper as on screen. his entire personality brings luke and vader’s difficulties in a sort of incredulous light, which makes it as funny as it is vulnerable and tragic. the sequel, Palpatine Ad Portas, brings piett into the spotlight, and oh man do his interactions with palpatine and vader bring u all the uncomfortable vibes. relish in it.

sparklight ( @littlesparklight ) man. lemme introduce u to an amazing prolific and detailed writer. i will never get over the series they’ve written & neither will u.

Where Our Intrepid Hero Doesn’t Get Away, 122k, incomplete. “One-shots surrounding either AU situations of canon/legends works where Luke would normally have gotten away (or Vader is simply inserted into the action to come pick his child up) but in these instances doesn't, or completely new scenarios of the same. There are no deep ruminations on consequences of the situations here, just our awful Sith dad picking his son up when he'd rather not be.”

exactly what it says on the tin. u know those glorious moments of fanfic where luke’s gotten captured and ur on pins and needles, waiting for vader to show up in a moment of dark glory? here’s the moment. here’s all the moments.

Space Race, 122k, incomplete. “Owen gives in to Luke's wish to attend the Imperial Academy and Obi-Wan is too late to avert it, though he's not too late to make sure Luke leaves Arkanis before Vader can gets his hands on him. Luke spends over a month running around the galaxy before his father gets him, and from there...”

this story relishes in chase and boy is it fun. it will keep you on the edge of your seat and it’s an amazing ride.

The Suns of Tatooine, 85k, complete. “Luke ends up on a moon swamped in dark side energy after a mission goes wrong, then his father appears... and then they go on a bit of a learning experience. This could've been the only thing that would come of getting through a Sith complex with his father, but thanks to going to free Han earlier than the gang did otherwise, more revelations are had. Will that change anything?”

this series is a thoughtful, contemplative piece examining the nature of the force and the relationship the skywalkers have with tatooine. the descriptions are beautiful, the inventiveness is amazing, and you’ll be thinking about it for long afterwards.

an additional few…

Between Flight and Longing; 34k, complete. “Luke Skywalker and Han Solo journey to the planet Balen'ar on a desperate mission and find more than they'd bargained for.”

a classic and it is for a reason. the interaction between han, luke, and vader is so spectacular and the slow trudge of going through the forest with your greatest enemy and best friend is something hilarious. the end is bittersweet and fantastic.

The Sith Who Brought Life Day, 13k, complete. “An Imperial officer loses a bet and has to get Darth Vader a present for Life Day.”

somewhere between terrifying and dull, this fic presents a canon-compliant look at the hunt for luke and the grinding wheels of the empire. the oc is amazing and it echoes in true star wars spirit: sometimes it’s just some dude who can change the galaxy.

Quintessence, 5k, complete. ‘“Well, Master, I think I’ve found the one positive aspect of this situation.” “Which is?” “The Temple won’t have to pay the costs for our funeral pyres.”’

pure hilarity and shenanigans abound in pre-aotc obi-wan and anakin hijink goodness. lemme tell u––u will deeply sympathize with mace windu afterwards. additionally, check out the rest of the author’s oneshots! they’re deeply thoughtful and the interactions the author writes between obi-wan and anakin are always gold.

some extras & shameless self-promotion

here’s a full list of recommendations for star wars rebels fanfic in case this is what you’re looking for (remember when this used to be a swr blog, lmao)

i’ve also written sw fanfic, both swr and luke-vader centric. drop by and tell me if it’s any good!

[minnarr]

Don’t Talk to Me About Naboo’s Moons

Last month, I had a little too much time on my hands when I ran out of things to do at work, so I made a Powerpoint. I did not expect to have 20 slides worth of yelling about Naboo’s moons, but here we are.

[ID: PowerPoint slide. The title, in big letters, reads “Don’t Talk to Me About Naboo’s Moons.” In smaller letters, the subtitle: “(Star Wars Writers Sure Didn’t Talk to Each Other About Them, Either)”. /end ID]

And now I’m adapting it to a Tumblr post, because why not.

How many moons does Naboo have?

I'm glad you asked

Three

Inside the Worlds of STAR WARS Episode I (2000) stated that they had one moon, and from TPM footage it’s hard to claim for certain there’s any more than that. Apparently taking their cue from Secrets of Naboo, a supplement to the WOTC Star Wars RPG, later sources have run with three moons

Source: https://www.theforce.net/swtc/orbs.html#naboo

Thrawn: Alliances (2018) compares another system’s moons with Naboo’s: “They were small moons, smaller than any of Naboo’s three…” (Ch. 15)

Nexus of Power (supplement to the Star Wars Force and Destiny Roleplaying Game) says Naboo has “three small moons”

[ID: Moonlight over Theed, The Phantom Menace. One obvious moon shines in the sky over Theed palace. Another bright object in the sky may also be a moon. /end ID]

[ID: Amidala’s starship passes a moon of Naboo, The Phantom Menace. The moon in question is tan and barren-looking. /end ID]

So, we have designations for three or fewer moons, right?

Wrong

There's five candidates: Ohma-D'un, Onoam, Rori, Veruna, and a “nameless mass”

Sources and Canon in Star Wars

Before we go on, let’s look at how we get information about the Star Wars universe, and how I select from contradictory information. If you’re familiar, obviously, feel free to skip ahead to the next section. The imaginary audience for the PowerPoint might not have been.

The old EU passes into Legends

On April 25, 2014, in the leadup to The Force Awakens, Lucasfilm announced that all previous Expanded Universe material would now be published under the Legends banner. All six previous movies plus The Clone Wars series “are the immovable objects of Star Wars history, the characters and events to which all other tales must align.” Novels, comics, and other expanded universe material published after the changeover to Legends is now known as New Canon (or Disney Canon).

Every fan ultimately comes to their own arrangement with what they consider canon — which pieces of New Canon and Legends they stitch together to come to a satisfying understanding of the Star Wars universe.

Canon status of roleplaying game materials

The canon policy of Wookieepedia is fascinating and I have not even scratched the surface, but the section on roleplaying games makes for especially convoluted reading. Both the West End Games and Wizards of the Coast licenses for RPGs ended before the Legends changeover; these are firmly Legends. 

Fantasy Flight Games, however, gained the license to card, board, and roleplaying games in 2011, just three years before the switch to New Canon. Lucasfilm Story Group has made no public stance on whether their material is canon. 

For this reason and because their publishing time for the RPG sourcebooks stretches before and after the changeover, Wookieepedia has gone case-by-case and selected which books apply to Legends, Canon, or both for article-writing purposes.

Mainstream solutions to the three-moon problem

[ID: A quote from Nexus of Power: “Three small moons - Ohma-D’un, Rori, and a nameless mass that is little more than an overgrown asteroid - house small colonies as well as a handful of offworld and orbital shipyard and factories.” /end iD]

Nexus of Power is an FFG sourcebook that was determined by Wookieepedia’s standards to apply to Canon as well as Legends articles. Its entry on Naboo, however, differs from the later sourcebook Rise of the Separatists, which Wookieepedia deems canon and cites in its selection of moons. 

The Rise of the Separatists entry reads:

Three moons—Ohma-D’un, Rori, and Veruna—orbit Naboo. They host small colonies with shipyards, orbital dockyards, and factories.

So even within one publishing license and one context, different moons have been attributed to Naboo.

Wookieepedia

Wookieepedia’s Canon page for Naboo lists Ohma-D’un, Onoam, and Veruna. Each of these comes from a different source:

Ohma-D’un cites Rise of the Separatists

Onoam cites Leia, Princess of Alderaan

Veruna cites Star Wars: The Visual Encyclopedia

They’ve made a choice—but it’s definitely not the only plausible choice. Each of the four names we’re given for Naboo’s moons has at least some backing in New Canon.

Onoam

Onoam is the only moon on this list that is fully and non-dubiously canonical, as Leia spent some time there in the 2017 novel Leia, Princess of Alderaan. It is, however, the funniest name choice: someone recently pointed out to me that it’s just an anagram of “a moon”

I love this, but Claudia Gray sure muddied the Naboo Moon Name Waters by making this the only choice it is impossible to reject. No shade, though. I loved the LPOA Naboo crumbs.

Onoam has both mines (plagued in the Imperial era by corrupt leadership and miner safety issues) and luxury housing. Before his assassination, Moff Quarsh Panaka resided in a chalet on Onoam, and Queen Dalné had a home there.

Sidebar: The Mining Moons

When discussing the assassination attempt on Padmé in Attack of the Clones, Mace Windu says, “Our intelligence points to disgruntled spice miners on the moons of Naboo.”

Leia, Princess of Alderaan establishes that Onoam was one of these moons; it mentions strikes and minor political violence a generation before Leia’s. It also establishes that Onoam is mined for medicinal spice, which by law can only be mined by humans, not droids

In Queen’s Shadow, which takes place in 28 BBY, the mining moons “struggle to maintain the balance between the rule of Naboo and their allegiance to filling their quotas”; the mining jobs are much less lucrative than farming on Karlinus

Veruna

[ID: a rather barren, tan-colored moon /end ID]

Star Wars: The Visual Encyclopedia (2017) identifies the moon pictured above as Veruna. The same moon was identified as Ohma-D’un by The Complete Star Wars Encyclopedia (2008), according to Wookieepedia. I have access to neither, but it looks like the moon the ship passed in TPM. For being one of Wookiee’s choices, the evidence for this name is astonishingly thin, but the same can be said of some of the others

Sidebar: King Veruna and his moon

The likelihood is that Veruna (the moon) was named for Ars Veruna, Padmé’s predecessor as Naboo’s monarch in Legends novels Darth Plagueis (2012) and Cloak of Deception (2001)

It is very probable that Veruna is no longer canon, and it is certainly impossible that he served a decade-plus term that ended shortly before Padmé’s reign:

Padmé’s immediate predecessor, according to Queen’s Peril (2020), was Queen Sanandrassa

Sometime during Eirtaé’s childhood, Réillata served a single two-year term, according to Queen’s Shadow (2019)

Even if he’s placed somewhere before Sanandrassa, there’s not really room for him to have reigned that long unless there are two monarchs between him and Padmé 

Rori

Rori was named and fleshed out in the 2003 game Star Wars Galaxies, which is now Legends. While it is one of the names given in the Fantasy Flight Games sourcebooks, it doesn’t seem to have a source anywhere else in New Canon.

Ohma-D’un

Ohma-D’un has one New Canon source outside of RPG sourcebooks: the 2018 reference book Star Wars: Smuggler’s Guide. In Smuggler’s Guide, Tyro Viveca (one of the owners of the in-universe book) mentioned seeing bursa-baiting on Ohma-D’un. Bursas are bear-like creatures originally from Legends material, where they were known to attack and destroy Gungan settlements.

I had a picture of a captive bursa for illustrative purposes, but honestly it made me too sad so I deleted it. Nevertheless, that’s stronger detail and evidence than we have for either Rori or Veruna.

Bonus fact: Naboo officially has no such thing as prison. When Panaka mentions this to Rabé, she says, “Only because we send everyone to the moon” (Queen’s Peril). Enjoy those implications!

TL;DR

While Onoam is definitely one of the moons, what you call the other two is up to each person’s discretion until something else is stated. Personally, I prefer Ohma-D’un and Rori, rather than Veruna. This partly because I don’t like Veruna the Legends figure (petty) and partly because Rori has some interesting Legends lore that could be drawn on in a pinch, which as far as I can tell Veruna does not. 

[grimoire-of-seven]

I have a crush on you

PROMPT :: “I have a crush on you..”

Rating: SFW

Words: 350-450 per character

Characters: Demon brothers + MC/Gender-Neutral Reader

Note: Thank you for the request! Although you didn’t specify which character, I took it upon myself to write for all of the demon brothers! It’s a little long so please continue reading under the cut!

LUCIFER

You stood your ground before him, eyes determined to express all these pent up emotions into words. When you arrived at the student council office, Lucifer was busy with several of the student council papers but insisted that he is listening to you.

“Lucifer,” You called out to the black-haired demon infront of you, hands clutching your Devildom Law book for courage, “I have a crush on you.”

“Hmm, yes,” He nodded his head almost automatically, his focus towards the papers unwavering, “You can put your term paper draft on my desk. I shall attend to that shortly after I finish this–”

“I said, ‘I have a crush on you’, Lucifer.” You repeated with a louder and much more resolute voice.

With that, his hands stopped mid-way through putting down one of the stacks. He directed his attention towards you, there was no semblance of an expression in his visage aside from its usual stoicism.

After that one second of shock, Lucifer then smiled at you with… was that pity or sadness in his– “…take that away.”

You gasped his statement, appalled that he dares to tell you how to deal with your feelings. You finally gathered the courage to tell him and he’s telling you to ‘take it away’?!

Within an instant, you made your way to his table and slammed your hand at his desk, “Now, listen here, you little shi–”

Wha-?!

He pulled your necktie with enough force that had you reeling towards him, the tips of your noses barely missing a millimeter.

“I’m just teasing.” He chuckled in delight, those piercing dark eyes staring at yours with such intensity that made your knees weak like jelly. “Time and time again, you amaze me with your honesty.”

Goosebumps trailed your arms as Lucifer’s hand caressed your cheek delicately. If he comes any closer, you’re most certain that he’ll hear the embarrassingly fast beating of your heart. “I like that.”

 MAMMON

“Plus four!” Mammon exclaimed in glee, slamming the card in the low coffee table. Before reaching to the deck for four more cards, the white-haired demon stopped you in your tracks and placed yet another identical card, “Another plus four! I change the cards to blue!”

“You can’t stack plus four cards! UNO tweeted that before–”

“We’re using local rules here, dummy, get with the program!” He smugly replied, smirking at you as you reach for eight cards. “Taste my reverse card!”

“Yikes,” You sighed at his beaming energy of mischief, placing a blue card down, “You sure play dirty…”

“I get to ask ya one truth or a dare if I win!” Mammon nodded eagerly at your words as if it’s a compliment to him. He removed another blue card from his deck and exclaimed, “UNO!”

“Greedy… you’re too greedy for victory.” You changed the colour of the cards to yellow in high hopes that his last card isn’t the same.

Please don’t be yellow–

“Got’cha!” Damn.

“Truth or dare?” He asked excitedly with the energy of a toddler on a sugar-high.

He would definitely ask something very private and embarrassing if you chose truth, given that he’s animatedly eager to get you to lose this round. With that in mind, you chose the lesser evil, “Dare.”

“I dare you to tell the truth!”

This stupid idiot… You sighed and nodded, “Fine. But give me the cards, I’ll shuffle it this time.”

“Who are you interested among the seven of us brothers?”

Ah, so that’s what this is. You chuckled, his earlier demeanor making much more sense with his ‘dare’. “No wonder you’re pumped up when I said we should higher the stakes.”

“Ya didn’t wanna bet money!”

“It’s an UNO game, man.”

“So, who is it?” He asked, leaning back to his sofa with crossed-arms as he waited for you to hand him his set of cards, “Maybe if you slide in some cash, I can help you get–”

“He’s quite cute.” You began, taking a card as a starter and waiting for Mammon to put down his first.

“Oh? So that counts out Asmo since he’d beautiful!”

“He makes me laugh a lot.” You smiled, “Reverse card, reverse card, plus four, change colour to yellow.”

“GAH! I don’t have any yellow!!!” Mammon twisted from his seat at the realization of his misfortune, seeing that you only have three cards remaining in your hand. “That can’t be Levi or Lucifer or Satan! Those guys would choke if they’re asked to share a joke. So, it’s either Beel or Belphie, huh!”

You shook your head at his words, placing down another card, “I have a crush on you, Mammon.”

“Wh–” He looked up at you with wide-eyes, “No! Q-Quit playin’ dirty! I ain’t fallin’ for that.”

“Reverse card, UNO,” You stared back at him, eyes never leaving his as you placed your last cards, “I win.”

LEVIATHAN

What does Ruri-chan have that you don’t?

Dejectedly wiping the said figurine with a damp towel, you asked that question to yourself.

You were summoned at Levi’s room earlier that day for some ‘important friend training’ to be facilitated by the purple-haired demon himself… only to find out that he’s cleaning his figures and needed a few more hands on deck.

Why does he like Ruri-chan so much? She’s a fictional character, for god’s sake!

“Hey, Levi,” You started, looking up from your task, “If I say I have a crush on you, what would you do?”

The man in question stared at you for a moment before erupting into a boisterous laughter. “LMFAO,” he spelled in glee, hands waving off your statement as if it’s a mere jest, “That’s the funniest joke I have ever heard from you in a long while lolol.”

“Take this seriously, Levi!” You wrung the damp towel in annoyance and weaponized it against your companion, hitting him by the leg with enough force to have him yelp in pain.

“OW, TF you doing? That hurts!” He rubbed his leg in attempt to stave off the stinging feeling, only to realize your reaction to his answer, “Wait, that wasn’t a joke?”

“Do I look like-?!”

“WTF!? That’s a horrible decision!” Levi exclaimed in disbelief, his eyes scanning your expression for some sort of… mischief in your eyes or a slightly wolfish grin.

But all he saw was that you were genuinely serious - about him and your feelings for him.  

“Why?” He breathed out the question, his head thinking of the times when you must’ve raised his intimacy close enough for you to drop that confession bomb on him, “Compared to Lucifer and Asmo, I’m not even the most handsome or popular character in this–”

“We’re not in a game.”

Levi went silent at your words.

Have you done it? Is this finally friendship over?

Panic began rising up your chest as he sat still, unmoving from his position. Before you can speak, he looked at you with a hopeful spark in his expression, “Then… does that mean I can like the main character, too?”

SATAN

Satan had offered to walk home with you together after hearing that Solomon is graciously tutoring you for certain RAD subjects – those that doesn’t exist in the human world. The blonde demon insisted that he doesn’t mind waiting for you given that there are still some things he has to do for the student council.

‘It sounds like an after-school date’, Solomon grinned at you before leaving. You swear, he’s got some sort of voodoo magic radar for your emotions.

Removing the thought of Solomon’s jests before you blush too hard, you thought of confessing to Satan before a certain someone runs his mouth about it. Should you…?

Yeah, it’s better to hear it from you than someone else – namely Solomon.

“Hey, Satan, I have a crush on you.” You told him, as casually as you can without breaking voice.

He stopped in his tracks, looking at you with disbelief. Satan opened his mouth to speak but stopped, taking a moment to think about his words, then simply asked, “Why…?”

Eh? “W-What do you mean ‘why’?”

You couldn’t really answer that. You’ve asked yourself a hundred times why you fell for a demon, the actual personification of Wrath itself, yet you can’t seem to find an answer for yourself. At least, you had no answers aside from… “I just really like you, Satan.”

He continued walking, you can feel the gears of his head turning as he oversees the situation in its logical perspective, “I’m a demon and you’re a human, need I remind you?”

That felt a pang on your chest, hearing him say it even though you are well aware of the fact.

Taking a deep breath to muster up the courage, you asked him for his final verdict, “So, you’re saying you don’t like me back?”

“Yes–!” He answered automatically, but then almost immediately denied, “Well, no.”

Huh. That’s quite confusing.

“I like you, too,” Satan smiled at you for a moment, “But things will be complicated if we think about this logically.”

Scratching the back of your head at his words, you couldn’t help yourself in saying, “When did love become a logical thing, though?”

He blushed at your words, hastening his walking speed to stop you from further seeing his reddened face, “S-Stop being too c-cute! I’m not lending you any more romance novels if you keep being so adorable!”

ASMODEUS

Asmodeus held your hand as if it was the most fragile thing in the world. With great precision, he coated your nails with an even layer of nail polish to match his wonderfully manicured ones.

People adore Asmodeus’ natural charm. What can you say? He’s absolutely flawless and drop-dead gorgeous.

Just thinking about the way his eyes sparkle at the news of Jeffrey Star’s new palette collection. The way he speaks excitedly whenever Prada presents their new line of designer bags. Hell, even talking about hand cream is a treat in itself whenever Asmodeus does it.

Look at you, absolutely whipped for this man and his undeniable charm.

He insists that you’re immune to his beauty yet you’re still attracted to him. It’s unfair to be this handsomely beautiful.

“Asmo, I think I have a crush on you.” You spouted out randomly, feeling his soft warm hands against yours.

“Of course, you do~” He replies as a matter-of-factly, “Everyone lusts over my magnificent–”

“I’m serious, Asmo.” You cut him off from his usual sugar-sweet line, “I like you.”

“Alright, humour me, love,” He put aside the nail polish and intertwined his hands in yours, his face closing towards yours dangerously, “If I accept your confession and we become a couple, what would you like to do with me…?”

With heated cheeks, you opened your mouth to speak but he sensually placed an index finger by your lips, he whispered with that hedonistic tone of his, “In private, that is…”

In private?! Gosh, he’s asking for a lot!

Suddenly feeling parched, you gulp at the thought of what you wanted out of him if he ever accepts you as a partner. Eyes flitting anywhere except towards his, you tried your best to hold your trembling body before him - backing down now might show your lack of conviction towards him, after all.

You mumbled softly, hoping that he can hear you through your closeness, “…ds with you.”

“Tsk tsk,” The peach-haired demon grinned as he clicked his tongue, “I can’t hear you with such a silent voice. You can do better than that~”

“M-Maybe hold h-hands with you… or c-cuddle if y-you want.” You repeated a bit more audibly, your blush deepening by the second, “I-It’d be fun to go o-on a café w-with just the two of us, too.”

“KYAAA~! That’s so wholesome and adorable!!!” Asmodeus squealed in delight at your answer, throwing himself at you in a tight embrace, “Alright, I’ll be your boyfriend and we’ll do all those together~! This is so exciting!”

“No!!! Asmo, my nails!”

BEELZEBUB

From whatever ‘reliable’ and expensive source you’ve heard [definitely not Mammon], Beel apparently loves a certain sandwich menu from Hell’s Kitchen. Unfamiliar with Devildom’s cuisine and Hell’s Kitchen’s menu, you were faced with a dilemma.

The question would be… which one of the three sandwiches in the menu he likes most?

This frustrating situation made you want to curse Mammon for scamming your 100Grimm with this useless piece of information. Sighing at the thought of having to buy all three just for good measure, you saw the Avatar of Gluttony himself walking pass the restaurant.

“Beel!” You exclaimed to get his attention, waving at the tall ginger-haired demon as he looked towards your general direction, “I have a question for you!”

He greeted you with that heart-melting smile of his, eager to answer any inquiries from you. You whisked him away from the street and into the shop, asking, “Which of the sandwiches in the menu do you like most?”

“What for?”

“Just answer the question, please~”

“The one with the tartare and cheese…” He replied, eyes dreamy at the menu board, most possibly captivated by the memory of having such a treat. Beel snapped from his reverie, explaining to you why it’s his most favoured, “It’s like your human food ‘cheeseburger’!”

You nodded and ordered the exact sandwich for him, much to his surprise.

It’s like a date! You inwardly screamed, mentally giving yourself a high-five for taking advantage of this sweet opportunity.

“Let’s split up the sandwich, as thank you for buying me food…”

How sweet! The thought made you want to curl up in the floor and cry in happiness, but resisted, “Come on, let me treat you once in a while!”

You both took a seat on the less conspicuous booths of the store. As Beel ate with glee, you chatted him up, content at the moment both of you were sharing.

“Why’d you *munch* even buy me food?”

“I like you!” You answered without a sliver of a doubt, carried too much at the connection you were sharing at the time. Blinking once… twice, you realized what you’ve done.

Well, fu–

“This food sure is great,” Beel avoided looking at you and continued eating, his face noticeably red from his blushing cheeks.

Groaning in defeat, you buried your face in your hands. It’d be rude to suddenly take back what you’ve said. Stupid me, stupid, stupid–

“I thought I’m hearing things because I’m still hungry.” The ginger-haired demon explained, his hands taking yours and peeling them off from your heated face, “You’re like this sandwich, you know that?”

“W-What…?”

“It’s my favourite, just as you’re my favourite person to be with!”

BELPHEGOR

You stared at Belphegor’s sleeping face, so peaceful and at ease.

It’s hard to think of him as a demon when he’s especially languid like this.

He had invited you to watch a movie that Levi suggested, only to doze off within fifteen minutes of the production, his head perfectly placed by your lap. Deciding that the Avatar of Sloth would rather sleep than watch, you let him sleep to his heart’s content.

The moment the movie ended, you didn’t notice that your lap had fallen asleep with him. Great.

You poked his cheek, seeing if he’ll wake up. “Belphie~” You cooed, “Belphie, wake up… My thighs has fallen asleep with you~”

“Fiv.. m’nutes…” He stirred, making himself much more comfortable on your lap and on the sofa.

“What am I gonna do with you?” You sighed in affection, smiling at his sleeping visage. Similar to Belphegor, you also made yourself comfortable on the sofa despite the stinging feeling by your thighs, “Alright, five more minutes, but only because I like you.”

To your surprise, Belphie spoke again, “Say that again.”

“I said you can have five more minutes, Belphie.”

“No, the second part…”

He heard that?!

You gulped, eyes avoiding his as you slowly repeated, “B-B… Because I like you.”

The raven-haired demon closed his eyes once, turning away from you, “I must be dreaming.” And within seconds, he has fallen asleep again just like that.

“No, Belphie, don’t sleep!” You stood up at his reaction to such an important confession, only to remember that he was formerly sleeping on your lap.

WHOOPS.

“Ow,” He rubbed his head after being unceremoniously thrown out of the sofa, sitting up groggily from all of the commotion, “Okay, so it’s not a dream.”

You sat beside him on the floor and rubbed his head as well, apologizing for it, “Why would think that, though?”

He looked away with a blush, “Because it’s too good to be true…”

[anonymous0writer]

Daddy Issues

Author: @anonymous0writer​

Warnings: Mentions of abuse. Swearing. Inferences of sex. Death...

Requested: Yes!! :) “If you take songfic requests - can you write maybe a JJ one with 'daddy issues' (the neighbourhood)? I really enjoyed 'Friends'! 😊😊”

Summary: Based off the song “Daddy Issues” by the Neighbourhood.

A/N: This was so fun. :) I have another request that might take a while to write after this one, so be patient with that one!! But send more in!! Also I made up JJ’s real name. I thought Jesse was fitting...

Lyrics are in Italics

Take you like a drug I taste you on my tongue You ask me what I'm thinking about I'll tell you that I'm thinking about Whatever you're thinking about

Tongues crash as you kiss him feverishly. His hands grasp your butt, roaming over you bare torso. You arch into his back, moaning softly. 

“God, JJ.” You whisper, breathless. 

He picks you up and carries you to the bedroom, crawling over you. He cages you in, hands on either side of your head. He sucks on your neck, leaving you breathless and needy. You whine his name, asking him for it. 

He smirks and undresses you with the ease of someone who’s had plenty practice. Most of them with you. You giggle, naked before him as you reach for his belt. He allows you to take off his pants and as you tease him, you watch his control fray. Once his pants are off, he pushes into you, unable to hold his need back any longer. You cry out his name at the sudden burst of pleasure.

The rest of the night is a blur of moans, pleasure, his rough voice and sheets. The memory of the amazing night it hazy, but your body remembers. You giggle and intertwine your fingers with his. He leans over, his chest pressing against your back. His hot breath brushes your bare shoulder as he kisses it. 

“What are you thinking about?” He mutters. 

“John B.” You laugh as he grunts with annoyance and kisses your shoulder again. “No. It’s always you, J.” 

“That’s my girl.” He holds you tight and makes a new hickey just below your jaw.

Go ahead and cry little girl Nobody does it like you do I know how much it matters to you I know that you got daddy issues

A knock sounds on your window. You frown and go to investigate. A familiar blonde boy is perched on your roof, tapping on the window. Gasping you work quickly on opening the window and allowing your boyfriend in.

“JJ what-” You start but stop as you take him in. 

Lip busted, black eyes and more probably splattered across his torso. Your jaw clenches. His father.

“Holy shit, J.” You whisper, looking up to meet his blue eyes. 

“It’s fine. Nothing I’m not used to.” He gives you half of a smile, but it’s quickly replaced by a wince. 

Snapping into your ‘doctor’ mode, you grabbed his hand and forced him to sit on your toilet as you went to grab your first aid kit. Sadly, you’d done this enough to know what to do. Not just with his dad, but with other kids. More specifically, Rafe Cameron. They always seemed at each others throats.

You cleaned him up and got a glimpse of the damage done to his ribs. Though you often begged him, JJ refused to go to the hospital. No matter what. Even if you were afraid they were broken. He was so stubborn sometimes.

After you cleaned him, you helped him into your bed, and cuddled and kissed him until you heard his breathing even out.

I tried to write your name in the rain But the rain never came So I made with the sun The shame, always comes at the worst time

You were breathing hard, rain sliding down your arms and spilling into your eyes. You stood across from your boyfriend. The blonde who was shaking his head. 

“No, stop saying that!”

“Why?” You screamed back. “Why JJ? I love you! It’s not a bad thing!” By now you were pleading. 

His blue eyes looked dark. His pale hair was darkened by the onslaught of rain. You two were drenched and screaming at each other, outside of John B.’s house. In the beginning of a hurricane. Fitting, right?

“Just stop saying that!” He yelled back, jaw clenched and eyes hard. 

You swallowed. “Why?” you’re voice broke. You knew he didn’t feel the same way. You knew it would take a lot for him to say it. And you were okay with it. But he had freaked out when you confessed. Now you were wondering if he just couldn’t say it, or he just couldn’t say it to you.

You felt like sobbing. And it was heart breaking. Today was your first year anniversary.

I keep on trying to let you go Not even let you know How I'm getting on I didn't cry when you left at first

You sat in your shower, the water spraying your puffy face. You were broken and sobbing. All along you knew that he didn’t love you, and you were okay with that. But he wasn’t, so he ended things. And you were okay. In the beginning. But then you saw him with another girl. And looked happier with her than he had been with you. 

So it was safe to say, that you weren’t okay now. You didn’t cry at first, but now it seemed like you couldn’t stop. And neither did the hurting. But he seemed okay. He seemed happy with his new girl. One that you couldn’t even compare to. One that had stayed with him longer than you. A year and two weeks. You and JJ couldn’t even make it to one. 

But now that you're dead it hurts This time I gotta know Where did my daddy go? I'm not entirely here Half of me has disappeared

You stood by John B., Kie and Pope. And Charlotte. You five stood in a line, black dresses and suits. The sun illuminated the stone engraved with a name that broke your heart. 

Jesse J. Maybank

Amazing friend, boyfriend and son

They said it was a bike accident. That he succumbed to his wounds. No matter what, he would’ve died. 

JJ. Your JJ. Your best friend. Your former lover. The love of your life. The only blonde you fell for. The funniest person in the world. The one that could make you smile no matter what. The one who got you and understood you. The only person you ever loved that much. 

Beside you, Charlotte sniffled. You knew she was hurting worse than you. After all, JJ actually loved her. And admitted it. And she wasn’t a bad person. She was actually the nicest person, with a rare, witty humor. Not to mention she was drop dead gorgeous. You tried not to hold resentment in your heart. And you didn’t. Over the years, you recovered and healed. But JJ was still the one. But the hard truth was that you weren’t the one for him.

And that hurt, but right now, you weren’t the only one in pain. Kie was sobbing in Pope’s arms. John B. was staring at the stone, tears streaming silently down his face. Charlotte was the complete opposite. She was on her knees, sobbing. The sound broke your heart. And you were surprised that you were the one to keep it somewhat together among the group. So you sank to your knees beside Charlotte and pulled her into a hug. 

“I know.” You whispered. “I miss him too.”

Go ahead and cry little girl Nobody does it like you do I know how much it matters to you I know that you got daddy issues And if you were my little girl I'd do whatever I could do I'd run away and hide with you

You looked at the letter with shaking hands. Your name was printed in familiar messy script on the front of the pale envelope. It’d been a year, and Charlotte had found the letter after finally cleaning the small apartment she and JJ shared and moved. She gave it to you a week ago, but you’d been too afraid of it. 

But you were ready. As ready as you’d ever be. 

Y/N, 

I don’t know if you’ll get this. Or when. Or hell, if I even keep it. I’ve written at least ten of these and just threw them away. I guess words were never my strong suit, yeah? (You better be damn proud of me because I’m actually writing this shit.)

You let loose a half sob, half laugh. God, you can hear him speaking to you. His blue eyes bright and his lips smirking. You keep reading. 

But this is what I wanted to say: I loved you. When you said those words to me, I freaked out. I’ve never been in love and I didn’t know what if felt like. And I didn’t realize it, but I was in love with you too. I just was blind and dumb back then. It was only when I found Char that I knew what I felt for you was love. But it’s different than what I have with Charlotte. 

You know that thing you said about the three loves in your life? Remember, we were on the boat, just us and watching the stars because that was your new obsession? Well, I remember it. And exactly what you said. I’ll never forget it. 

“You have three loves in your life. The first one is your first love. It’s messy and heartbreaking and might not seem like love, but it is. Because it’s what you believe to be love. The second one is your hard love. You heal from past mistakes and you learn and grow together. But its hard because it’s worse than the first. It puts you through hell, but that’s when you find out what you want and you become stronger and wiser. And then your last love. The one that the one. You find each other when you least expect it. You might not even be looking for it. But you love each other and you love them completely.”

Your heart wrenches. He remembered that. All of it. He was really listening.

And I believe you were my first love. We believed what we had was love, and it was. At least you did. I’m am sorry that I didn’t realize that I loved you when we were together. I should’ve. And I wish I could take it back. Go back and tell you I loved you. Because while I love Charlotte more than anything, I think, that if I told you I loved you, we’d be together still. And we wouldn’t have to go through our hard love. We could just skip from first love to last love. 

I’m sorry, Y/N. I wish I would’ve said it all those years ago. But I loved you. I still love you. 

From, 

JJ