#jacob too. i think jacob would be bothered by that but not to the degree of saying anything

[enneamage]

please share what new insights you have on 9s :) i find it hard to recognize 9s who are high energy like karl jacobs and tubbo especially

It’s the high-energy thing I've been grappling with recently, actually! It used to trip me up too, usually my bindspot would be the higher energy 9w1s / when they’re generally in manic-workaholic mode (compared the humble minecraft builder slow and steady tinkering), because that tends to be the opposite of what most profiles would expect. 

At the core of most enneagram types usually sits a paradox or two that they swing on, although they’re endlessly multi-faceted on top of that. Sixes get a fear / bravery split, Fives get being real smart / not knowing a dang thing (/j), and Nines get inertia  / flow-state-workaholism. 

High-energy Nines have the workaholic streak of Threes in that they’re inclined to hustle to buy their ticket into the world, socially, systemically or interpersonally. (The difference between this and Three integration is how much consideration they give to what they’re doing, or if the work is just what happens to be in front of them / given to them at the time, as they can struggle to say ‘no.’) They meld with people, but they also meld with workflows, easing into a slipstream of goals and tasks and doing. 

High-energy Nines seem to have a hard time pulling themselves out of the flow state, and can struggle with flowing from thing to thing if they’re stressed or disoriented. It’s a bit of an ADHD caricature at times (regardless if they have it or not) because they can move from distraction to distraction by accidentally putting equal weight on all possibilities and getting lost in the sauce because of it. 

I was kind of resigned to assuming that I would never really intuitively understand what ‘a fear of disconnection’ meant, because according to The Scrolls I’m one of the most naturally remote people out there and threatening me with time separate from the world is like threatening me with a vacation. What I needed to tap into was their drive for feeling and being felt by the world in a grounded way, stimulation itself, something a bit more in the vein of effectiveness. 

Nines tend to believe in their own natural irrelevance (as an ego) in the flow of life. Sometimes it bothers them, sometimes they’re at peace with it– it’s not a fully rational belief, but it’s how they experience themselves and how they sometimes experience others experiencing them. They can be a bit melty at the edges, taking on the perspective of others because they’re magnetized to that outside input to some degree. Some of them can be very naturally selfless and invest in other people both for their own enjoyment and to go along with something that feels like it has gravity, pulling them into that slipstream again. 

On the flip side, it can also give them a complex to try and make up for their sense of irrelevance, to try to build or find something to hold onto so they’re not lost to the void of the world and their own psyche. Of all the things it took me way too long to understand, this one is pretty high on the list– what can feel like a life-or-death scrape to feel connected to something (without being fully consumed by it, a thing that some of them might think they want but tend to burn out on.) Because they feel like the tether they’re grasping is so thin, some of them can feel very easily undermined or discouraged. If you take into account the wings delegating how anger goes, you might get a dismissive or bullish Eight wing or a sharp and obsessively self (and other) critical One wing. You might also start to deal with jealousy and envy as they decide that certain things overshadow them naturally or are out of their reach on a count of who they are. Can easily become resentment if they lean into learned helplessness, or thinly veiled passive aggression if they’re trying to be competitive and play peacemaker at the same time. 

That’s a bit of the worst-case scenario, though. Most Nines ‘arrive’ fairly gently, but this accounts for the fringe Nines that almost show up with a vengeance– super amped up and eager to hustle out loud in a way that one usually doesn’t expect from Nines. (But it does come out in little ways in even the milder cases– a covert competitive streak seems to be a guilty pleasure if you put certain games in front of them. They like mastery as much as anyone if the mood is right.) 

If they choose to burn the fuel of “I want to be something to someone / the world” they can naturally turn this energy into an altruistic ambition to have an effect on the lives of the people around them in a positive way. Choosing one particular path might be the hard part, but natural flexibility can back them up as they find their way there. 

[spectrophobias]

I wanna pick at your wonderful mind for a minute; have you got any headcanons regarding Kaitlyn (and your other Quarry muses if you'd like too! ) about the aftermath of Hackett's Quarry? Did Kaitlyn keep in touch with anyone, if so, who? How does she feel about that night?

OH YOU ARE SO LOVELY!!!!!! thank u so much for this omg

so to understand kaitlyn's feelings about that night i'll give you a little context about my hcs for her life in general!! her mom hasn't been in the picture for a while, so she mostly grew up with her dad, who she would describe as an absolute weirdo (affectionate). he's the one who taught her to shoot and general survival skills, he's sort of toeing the line towards being a prepper LMAO but definitely on the more sane side of things, more kooky than unhealthily obsessed if that makes sense ! so for her whole life he's been a big believer in being prepared to fend for yourself, self sufficiency, etc etc. she grew up in one of the bumfuck nowhere areas of upstate ny, lots of trees and animals, her dad bought some land and slapped a manufactured home on top of it type of deal. if you've ever driven around up here (or in any rural area tbh) u know exactly what i mean LMAO.

so needless to say, kaitlyn is SO PISSED to have him proven right!!! /lh. she loves him, their relationship is good, but god it sucks admitting your dad is right after years of telling him to Calm Down. she goes back to living with him while all of the legal aspects are ironed out, he's insanely proud of her for handling herself and defends her very vocally even before the potential charges are dropped. she doesn't really confide in him or anything but he's a strong support to lean on and it helps her to have a place to process and get her shit together.

she takes a gap year before she goes to college, maybe even two. she had been planning on taking one anyways just to work and tuck away a bit of money, she'd been working since she was old enough too but. u know. the cost of school is fucking insane. she kind of wants to go into fashion/costume design for media but she's a little terrified of failure actually. what if she wastes all that time and money and her degree ends up useless?? either way she has way bigger things than that to think about for the first couple years after the Incident.

she and jacob grew up in the same town, so they've always talked pretty regularly, or at least been in adjacent social groups. she keeps talking to him, she likes the familiarity of knowing someone for so long. a lot of her friendships are a little superficial, so she's not really used to still having childhood friends jgkdka so he's important to her. she talks to dylan too, which probably means she talks a little to ryan by extension, but mostly dylan. she definitely worries about him coping with the whole No Hand thing and doesn't want him to feel ditched so she makes it a point to keep in contact with him. she occasionally talks to abi and emma, but she's significantly less close to them, and she doesn't really talk to nick? i think she'd like laura a lot but they would have to actually talk and get to know each other first. ofc that's all dependant on them actually surviving the night gjskfj she is definitely worse off if anyone dies!!

as for how she feels about it all, it definitely takes her a bit of time to start feeling Mentally Stable again but she gets there!! at first she's just exhausted, overwhelmed, still can't really even make sense of what happened and everything they saw. she doesn't really have anyone to process it with outside of their little group of counselors, and she never wants to bother them. there's a decent amount of isolating herself and just trying to piece herself back together on her own. she's definitely proud of herself for surviving and for stepping up to try and protect her friends, she's glad to know that she would really react that way in a crisis, but she never wants to have to be strong in a moment like that again. she's definitely a bit less spontaneous and impulsive, more conscious of the situations she's putting herself in. once the legal stuff is worked out and she's able to get a full time job, the routine helps her a lot and she starts to slowly interact with people again. she's not entirely sure how to let new people in knowing that she can probably never talk about what she actually went through without being dubbed absolutely insane, so a lot of her friendships stay on that same superficial level as before, but the more time that passes between her and that event the easier it gets. i like to think she really does live her dream gjfkskd get involved in something theatrical, settle down with someone nice, just gets to actually relax finally!! god knows she deserves it😭😭

[socially-awkward-skeleton]

“Jealousy seems to be a great motivator for you.”

>:3

I'm so sorry this one took so long for me to write, but with the newest batch of smut prompts I found some new motivation for the jealousy prompt.

This one also includes the prompt: “I don’t like people touching what’s mine.” from @fourlittleseedlings

So without further ado...smut is under the cut

"Joseph tells me you managed to swing her to our reasoning. What did it take?"

John's voice was a rasp over the radio waves. He'd been holed up at the compound after the accident and the ribs were taking the longest to heal. Jacob could hear it in his voice, the nagging pain was a constant reminder to John of his failure and it drove him crazy. Even crazier than usual.

"What's it matter to you?"

The half-hearted interest from the eldest brother was an added twist of the knife in the Baptist's back.

"I had her Jacob, so close to her atonement, she could have been mine!" He roared.

There was the feral beast he knew lay below the surface. The real face of John, not the angel he claimed to be.

"What do you mean yours?"

"What do you think I mean, brother?" The words hissed from him, slipping between sharp fangs ready to strike.

Darkened eyes under a heavy brow tried to remain focused on the desk he was working at, but John always knew the right things to say to get under his skin. Knew how and where to hurt him, to get him to react, like nobody else.

"Did you fuck her?" He tried to keep his voice calm and even, the same resolute tone he always spoke with. He couldn't let John know the poison was seeping in.

"Now Jacob, no need to be quite so crass about it. A man like me doesn't kiss and tell."

John's voice grated on him. He was practically laughing in his face. It always bothered him how much joy his brother felt, knowing he was torturing him and without ever having to pick up a knife.

He flicked off his radio and stared at the pinholes in the wall where his plan for Eli once hung. Eyes bloodshot and sore, he rubbed at them with his calloused palms. Surely, if what John said had taken place, she would have told him? She could look him in the eye, and she never flinched.

Then again, she also had the Resistance believing she was on their side.

Heavy boots drummed upon old wooden floorboards. Feet moved double time as he stormed down the stairs towards the showers. There she stood under the running water, thick waves of auburn hair fanning out down her back, sticking to her soaking wet skin.

Baring it all, soon she would be in more ways than one.

Grabbing her by the arm, he swung her around to face him. Her back slammed against the shower wall, his hand pressed to her chest with enough strength to keep her from running or fighting. Shower water poured down his back, drenching his shirt, but he barely noticed. Too focused on her to care about anything else.

"When were you going to tell me?"

"Tell you about what?" Kit's eyes bugged out of her skull. He'd caught her unaware, and she seemed angrier about that than about being confronted.

"John."

Her gaze fell from him, focusing on the drops of water that fell down her now reddening skin. "I knew that would come back to bite me in the ass."

A flush rose up her face, even the tips of her ears started to turn red. He could practically see the water evaporating off of her with how her skin burned.

"What happened?" His stare dug into her with the same force his fingers did into her flesh.

She wasted no time in confessing. There was no point in lying, not to him, he'd know. "It was a kiss. Technically a few. But it doesn't mean anything now. I'm yours."

He froze, icy eyes widening at her choice of words. "Now? It meant something, then?" His head tipped to the side, as if the 45-degree angle would help him understand better.

"At the time…" Her hand wrapped tightly around his wrist, trying to pry him off of her. "... John can be very convincing. He was the first person to understand me in a long time. I didn't have to hide from him, just like I don't have to with you."

His hand slid from her chest, up her neck, bracing her jaw in his grip, pressing the back of her head back up against the cold concrete wall. His thumb traced over her lips, pulling at her plump pout roughly. "Not sure I'm such a fan of knowing Johnny was here first."

"Would it make you feel better knowing you're the last?" She said flatly.

He didn't appreciate her tone, but he also knew she wasn't lying. She was willing to do anything and everything for him. She was his most loyal, his right hand.

His hand fell from her jaw, finally letting her go free, the skin left red where pressure had been placed. He grabbed the hem of his shirt and pulled it up over his head, tossing it to the ground with a wet slap against crumbling floor tiles. His mouth crashing down against her, pressing forceful kisses against her, bruising her lips.

"I don't have to remind you who you belong to, do I?"

Staring down into those icy eyes of hers, seeing that glimmer of madness that always lay just below the surface made him realise just why his brother was driven insane over her. Monstrous beauty was the only way he could define it.

"I just said I'm yours, didn't I?" She growled back.

She clung to him tightly, her hands tracing up his back, pulling him into her embrace like the black hole she was. Drops of water slipped down his nose, splashing onto her face. Only inches separated them as they sized each other up once again, having to rebuild the trust they had tentatively agreed upon.

Fingers slid over slick skin, goosebumps following closely behind. She shivered against the wall, her lip quivering gently as the cold air stung at her the longer she remained out of the water. Ragged nails dragged along the curve of her hip, leaving angry red lines behind.

His tongue dipped between his cracked lips, eyes scanning over her body, quickly forgetting why he was angry as the heated blood began to flow somewhere else.

Her head tilted back to gain him access to her mouth, instead his lips travelled down her neck, retracing every bruise she had in differing shades of scarlet and indigo. Reaching her shoulder, he clamped down with his teeth, hard enough to break the skin.

That same little breathy squeak escaped her as he marked her, the same way he had a dozen times before. It wasn't a new sound, but it was one he was fond of hearing all the same. One that told him he had cracked that hard exterior of hers to reach whatever softness remained down below.

He ran his thumb over the indented marks of his teeth in her pale flesh, squeezing the blood to the surface. "I don't like people touching what's mine"

"No one else ever will."

Her hands made short work of his belt, pulling the leather from the buckle, and undoing the button. She slipped her hand down the front of his jeans, rubbing against his cock with her soaking wet hands. A growl built in the back of his throat, it didn't feel anywhere near as good as her cunt or her mouth, but to get him started it would do just fine.

Stroking him, getting him harder with just her touch, her eyes focused entirely on him. She might have been smaller than him, but the power she held was intoxicating. The desire he felt for her was impossible to ignore. She commanded his attention. She owned him as much as he owned her, and every soul knew it, even as she walked around his mountain under the guise of being the Deputy, his dog tags hung around her neck, tucked under the neckline of her sweater.

Grabbing her thighs, he pressed her back against the wall and lifted her up, her arms wrapped tightly around his shoulders, her fingers trailing over the buzzed scalp and shock of red hair. She squeezed him into her with the power of her thighs, the muscle under her coiled snake tattoo tightening until it was as hard as iron as he pushed up inside of her.

A shuddering gasp dragged out of her as she pressed her forehead to his. Caressing the side of his face, fingertips gently traced his scars as he bottomed out inside of her, pressing against her insides, making her hiss.

Sliding back out of her, her hiss pulled into a moan and then a purr as he pushed back up into her slowly. His cock rubbing up against that perfect spot, practised and perfected, just like he was training for battle (exactly what loving her was).

He grabbed at her flesh, fingers digging into her to bruise, a vice grip around her as his thrusts pushed deeper inside of her, as deep as he could possibly go. He couldn't be sure if it was tears or simply the water from her wet hair but they dripped down her cheeks as a flush overtook her.

Red was most certainly her color. Always had been. She never looked better than when she was covered in blood. And as her skin turned that perfectly aroused shade of blush, he found himself staring.

"Harder!"

She dug her nails into his back, clawing at him to force a reaction out of him. His hips snapped in and out, slamming her tailbone against the wall and she didn't seem to care. Her cunt making wet, squelching noises as he continued to fuck up into her.

Squeezing her eyes shut as she moaned out, the echo of her cries reverberated amongst concrete walls like a cave.

"God, you're so fucking deep," She mewled before crashing her mouth against his.

His teeth dragged against her bottom lip each time she tried to pull away to breathe. He had to let her know what it felt like being around her, that feeling of suffocating he lived with every day. A feeling he didn't want to lose.

Her chest rose and fell rapidly, her breasts pressing up against him, beads of sweat and water passing between their hard, muscular bodies. Toned and tempered to be weapons, and yet in moments like this, they seemed to be able to melt into each other, more like molten metal.

A breathy laugh shook out of her as he bounced her up and down on his cock, feeling her cunt fluttering around him as her slick arousal collected around the base of his shaft.

"Jealousy seems to be a great motivator for you.”

He couldn't help but smirk, looking up at her through his heavy brow. Even in the middle of fucking she couldn't help but provoke him.

"Don't make it a habit."

He rutted into harder and faster as he could feel himself getting closer, his nails digging crescents into her ass as he pulled her towards him, increasing the angle.

Her arm slipped from his shoulder, the other wrapping tighter around the back of his neck, as she brought her hand between her legs. Her fingers rubbing furiously at her clit, her teeth gritted together as her back arched and her cunt clenched around him.

"Jesus Christ!"

He couldn't move, locked in a steel trap between her legs as her whole body went rigid and then moments later falling slack against him. As she loosened around him, he continued his motions, dragging his cock in and out of her. Soft gasps and moans leaking from her as her still sensitive cunt was being used.

"I'm sorry," She whispered softly, coiling her fingers in his hair.

It was the first time she'd ever apologised for anything, likely the only time she would. The gooey, soft center of hers was on full display for him. He wasn't sure how to answer, how to respond. Did he just ignore it? He tried not to lose momentum, to lose his rhythm and kept fucking. Her whines steadily building, her tight pussy clutching him, fluttering against him once more the same way her eyelashes did as she looked at him with cold blue bedroom eyes.

The coil in his gut was getting tighter, about ready to snap. His thighs burned, aching as he maintained her position against the wall. Growls and groans built up in his chest, reverberating through his ribcage.

"Fuck!"

He pinned her back against the wall, forcing her legs open wide with his hands, thrusting as hard as he could with all the power he had left and none of the restraint. He could have torn her in fucking two.

"Gonna fill you with my cum," he rasped.

Her cries morphed into screams of pleasure, sounding more like the feral thing she was, only spurring him on.

"Please!"

With a final thrust, his cum coated her insides, his cock thrusting it in and out of her, drops of it falling to the floor below and circling down the drain.

His head fell to her chest as he caught his breath, listening to the drumming of her heart.

"You're all mine, angel."

She cradled his face against her breasts and gave a heaving sigh. "I'm all yours."

[little-forget-me-not]

day/aeriel/william

text conversation discussing my OCs Day/Aeriel/William’s relationship/family dynamic

[6:20 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: This makes me want to explore Days relationship with his absent dad

[6:20 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: Cuz like surely that bothered him to some degree right

[6:20 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: Always just took it at face value

[6:34 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: I feel like she told him the stork delivering babies story and he's like "my daddy is a stork?" And she's kinda like sure and for a long time he was satisfied with that cuz he had this imagination if his origins and everything. When he told other kids they laughed or found it fascinating

 He probably believed it for a long time before some kid when he's older mocks him for it

[6:36 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: She would rather tell him his father is dead or never existed than for him to know that he was a bastard child unwanted by everyone in her life except her

[6:36 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: Day didn't know about her past at all

[6:36 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: that makes a lot of sense

[6:37 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: does he know his father is still alive?

[6:37 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: Also because Day was friends with Jacob at an early age, it became normalised to him that not all kids had nuclear family

[6:37 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: ohhh that makes sense

[6:37 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: teenage day i mean

[6:37 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: So he didn't really question it. Probably thought Jacob was a stork baby too

[6:38 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: Cuz eventually he knows stork babies aren't a real thing x'D

[6:38 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: yeah man

[6:38 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: he doesn't seem like he won't ask later on

[6:38 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: unless aeriel says the dad is dead or sth lol

[6:39 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: does aeriel tell him his middle name is after his dad?

[6:39 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: Probably also thought the stork carried the wrong letter/name that's why Jacob was previously a girl and had a different name

[6:39 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: Aeriel probably told him this lmfao

[6:39 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: She also illustrated storybooks of the stork concept so it probably seemed very real for day ad a kid

[6:40 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: I'll have to think about all these questions xD

[6:41 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: Omg he probably asked to see the letter and it's actually just his birth cert

[6:52 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: Aeriel doesn't want Day to ever think/know that

1. He was a bastard child

2. Neither of his grandparents or father wanted him

3. The only "support" she was given was meant to be used to abort Day

4. She cut ties with her family and ran off on her own to raise him

5. Will was not a good person

6. Will did not love him

 so I think she lied to Day and eventually told him that his father was dead

[6:54 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: omg

[6:54 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: i want to make it so Day does find out it's a lie and I think it's going to be absolutely devastating to him to realise his mother lied to him

[6:54 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: omg...

[6:54 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: omg do you want the drama

[6:54 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: wow oof

[6:54 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: he asked because he wanted to make sure they got him right too cuz what if he was actually a girl and his name was something else lmao

[6:55 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: omfg...

[6:55 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: is aeriel avoiding thinking about this topic herself?

[6:55 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: shE IS

[6:55 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: no wonder

[6:55 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: she was very relieved when Day bought the stork story and she thought she never had to deal with it again

[6:55 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: but what about when he was a teen tho

[6:56 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: oh she told him that his father was dead

[6:56 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: yeah i think he learns that in like..maybe middle school or smth ...really late xD he bought into the stork theory for a long time (like how my sis lowkey believed in the tooth fairy )

[6:56 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: hahahaha

[6:57 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: by then he was older and the death concept made things click for him

[6:57 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: it's very cool how in the family dynamic, whatever happens with the parent really has an effect on the child

[6:57 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: right!!

[6:57 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Wow

[6:57 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Would he want to know a date or the grave?

[6:57 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: i hate it!!! because i see it reflected in me!! xD

[6:57 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: To visit?

[6:57 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: omg you're right he would...........

[6:57 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: fuckin Aeriel digging herself a hole

[6:57 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Like how parent affects child?

[6:57 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: It's like the eve/yvonne/Jacob situation hahaha

[6:57 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: she probably lied the whole fucking way for years oh jesus

[6:57 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Because I would lol

[6:58 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: yeah...........................

[6:58 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: This is totally a disaster waiting to happen HAHAHA

[6:58 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: The drama omg

[6:58 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: it is omg

[6:58 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: By the way, you should write this down lol

[6:58 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: but ...i cant see her telling him the truth when he was so young

[6:58 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: ....i will xDDDDDDD ill compile the chat lol

[6:58 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: it's also too fresh for her and she doesnt want to deal with it

[6:58 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: That makes sense for sure

[6:58 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: I was just wondering how she deals with it when he's older

[6:59 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Is day sad that his dad is 'dead'? And he vists the grave and everything?

[6:59 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: imagine they bump into Will and Aeriel just goes rigid and Will looks at her and is like "...Flo?" and he sees Day and his eyes widen even more and he's like "Is that?" and Aeriel is like GTG

[6:59 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Because I can totally see that lol

[6:59 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: HAHAHA

[6:59 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: OOF

[7:00 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: oh my god Aeriel probably told him they couldnt visit the grave or anything cuz it's really far away (which is true, she did leave the area) so they made like a makeshift one in the backyard (.........wonder how Aeriel feels about that fucking smh)

[7:00 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Oh my god.......

[7:00 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: I'm dead

[7:00 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: but then Day probably tried to save up tickets so they could all visit and stuff

[7:01 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Day would treat it very seriously right?

[7:01 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Yeah omg

[7:01 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: How does Aeriel feel about that lol

[7:01 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: increasingly horrified lol

[7:01 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: she's really forced to confront this

[7:01 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: i think she breaks down

[7:01 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: I mean....

[7:01 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Ooof

[7:01 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: and Day stops after that because he realises he's upset her

[7:01 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: so after a certain age he stops bringing his dad up

[7:01 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Aeriel..........

[7:02 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: like he learns that it's a taboo subject

[7:02 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: I need to bathe but keep this coming

[7:02 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: jesus i never thought about this ahahaha

[7:02 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: I NEED TO EAT

[7:02 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: It's the same feeling as watching a train wreck

[7:02 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Aeriel................ Omg

[7:02 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: IT IS

[7:02 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: im like..oh god i cant look away

[7:02 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Please write all this up omg

[7:02 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: Day is a super curious child though like there's no way he'll stop badgering her about it

[7:02 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Yeah

[7:03 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: She just keeps deflecting and distracting him

[7:03 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: And he's emotional and he would hold on to stuff like that

[7:03 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Is he sad when it's fathers day and he's older and thinks his dad is dead?

[7:03 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: He'd probably want to know the death date right... Would she make it up too? Omg

[7:04 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: like with the stork theory, she bought years of time xD cuz Day would just draw his own stories and make up what his "dad" was like and ask his mum if they could visit the Storkland or if he can fly and all that and his own imagination basically filled in whatever gaps there were and kept him busy and satisfied for a while

[7:04 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Hahahahaha

[7:04 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Oh gosh

[7:04 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: She's literally just like holding him off

[7:04 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: ....YEAH..she's sentimental so I feel like the date would have either been his actual birthday or the date they split up

[7:05 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: How does she feel about it herself?

[7:05 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Like is it that she can't accept that this is what happened with Will?

[7:05 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Like I'm just curious what's motivating her avoidance

[7:05 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: OOF

[7:05 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Day is living a lie and mourning a lie... I'm dead 🤣😐

[7:06 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: teenage Day probably did a lot of his own research actually.......he wants to know more about this elusive father whom Aeriel never talks about. She only says stuff like "he's kind/good/gentle" etc and omits everything else. And when Day asks if she thinks he would have loved him too it fucking shoots her in the heart like an arrow

[7:06 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: I'm going to bathe but this is such a train wreck omgg

[7:06 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: kids man

[7:06 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: OOF

[7:07 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: If Aeriel never really dealt with it, it makes sense with how she went from being under her parents control to being Day's mom

[7:07 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: It's heartbreak. I don't even know what it's like to feel heartbreak like hers to be completely honest. She literally lost everything and became deeply disillusioned with the world for a bit. She couldn't believe Will would have treated her the way he did and she...couldn't really make peace with it. I wonder if she ever shared this with anyone...like Noella or someone. Idk yet.

[7:07 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: In a way with having to bring up Day, she doesn't have the free time to think about it? I guess?

[7:08 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Ohhhhh

[7:08 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: That makes a lot of sense. She loved him right?

[7:08 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: She just avoided thinking about it as much as she could because she couldn't even come to terms with it herself. Overtime it became easier to just keep throwing blankets on it

[7:08 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: I can't see her sharing this with anyone right now

[7:08 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: That makes a lot of sense

[7:09 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: thats' why when Day presses her she breaks down because it hits too close to home, all her fears and heartache and bitterness and confusion and a deeper sense of "what have i done/am i doing this right/was i not good enough"

[7:09 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: and she has no time for that

[7:10 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: She definitely becomes ...different when you mention Will. Her whole demeanor shifts and I think it probably scared kid Day so he just learnt not to bring it up

[7:11 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: he knows his dad's name though. "William". And he's like :D that's my name too!

[7:18 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Oof...

[7:18 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Oh man

[7:18 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Our characters really made me realize that a perfect parent doesn't exist

[7:19 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: No matter how good your intentions or what kind of person you are

[7:19 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Hahaha I can definitely see Day like that

[7:20 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Are you going to explore this more?

[7:20 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: I dont think Aeriel herself knows how she feels about Will. It's such a mix of so MUCH that she can't really ...think about it for too much. It reduces her to tears and I feel like it's smth she needs to talk to someone about to process it

[7:20 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: This is so interesting

[7:20 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: yeah man

[7:20 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Oof...

[7:20 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Is this why she threw herself wholly into raising Day? I mean, of course she loves him and she left everything for him

[7:21 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: But it's also a convenient reason to not have to think about all this

[7:21 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Or to think about romance or connecting with people in that way

[7:22 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Now that I think about it, she doesn't have many connections other than Day right? It seems like she never seemed very close to Noella though Noella is super friendly. Did this affect how she is unconsciously closed off to any new person or resisted having new connections? She has trust issues. She feared Noella wanted to take Day from her

[7:22 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Sorry for the questions lol, I was just thinking about how it might affect her

[7:22 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: NOOO THE QUESTIONS ARE VERY GOOD

[7:23 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: I just realized she really has no friends

[7:23 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: YEAH OMG....she just made him her whole world and ...well yes it's like it's her responsibility and everything but she could always say she didnt have time to deal with herself because Day. Like Day became her excuse too

[7:23 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Like not in a judgy way but the only strong connection she has in her life is Day

[7:24 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: YEAH I definitely see that in her

[7:24 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: I do think she has a friend group! But idk how much she....yknow, goes out and shit.

[7:25 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: This explains why you said her life was like being under her parents control, and then raising Day and she never really explored her own interests and all that

[7:25 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: I mean the timing is unavoidable but it also makes sense that there wasn't another self-exploration part to it

[7:25 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Ohhh that makes sense!

[7:26 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Idk why she always struck me as having her whole life revolving around Day

[7:26 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: She wanted to keep Day close to her...kinda like how her parents kept her close to them omg

[7:26 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: but also because of how her parents were so overbearing, she gives Day way more freedom too

[7:26 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: That makes a lot of sense

[7:27 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: but more unconciously, it also supplies the reason why Day doesnt feel comfortable leaving her for too long

[7:27 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Yeah man

[7:27 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: It explains the very subtle codependency

[7:27 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: dang it goes deep

[7:28 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: She does have more time for herself after day goes to school and all that

[7:31 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: she does!  i see her opening up more then but at the same time...

[7:31 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: idk i vibe with her in my current condition except hers is way deeper ._.

[7:32 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: she had a thorn festering deep in her and she never pulled it out. Just kept bandaging over it and ignoring it until it looks like it's scabbed over

[7:32 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: that's years of pus and decades of deeper trauma she never addressed

[7:33 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: i dont even know what the deal with her family is

[7:33 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: did they disown her? did they look for her? she was the one who ran away so maybe this whole time they were looking

[7:35 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: because i have this feeling that if she shows up again, yes her parents will be critical and angry but also ....happy to see her? and even Day? they might even feel guilty about the whole situation? Esp when they see what kind of person Day is

[7:40 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Oof

[7:40 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Yeah man

[7:40 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Are you gonna explore her past?

[7:40 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: It seems like it's a big part of how the whole situation with Will plays out

[7:41 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Oh wow... Its even weirder when you think of them as Day's grandparents

[7:43 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: very true...perhaps i shall xD

[7:43 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: it's a hard topic

[7:43 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: she doesn't let me in so it's harder to know

[7:43 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: ikr

[7:43 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: idk how i'll feel if i lived scraping by and suddenly learnt that actually my entire extended family that i didnt know is RICH

[7:44 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: and they partially had a hand in my situation

[7:44 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: bound to feel...squirmy

[7:51 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: lmao i was thinking that if Day seemed a bit distant and off due to this, he'll still be all smiley and jokey with his friends and i think most people won't even realise he has such a big issue as this in his life at the time

[7:55 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: I feel like when Aeriel finally tells Day the truth, he doesn't have the space to process it because he's more focused on supporting his mom because of how clearly deeply upset she is about it

[7:56 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: He doesn't think about how HE feels about it, just how she is taking it and how she is feeling

[7:56 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: It'll probably catch up to him after when his friends ask him about his feelings and he has to confront them too

[7:57 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: but I have a feeling he's very shaken at the fact that she lied to him because he always trusted her 200%

[7:57 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: for so long too

[8:09 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Yeah gosh.... That's messed up

[8:09 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Omg

[8:09 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Aww

[8:09 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: That makes sense with his personality

[8:09 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Oof

[8:09 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Yeah omg

[8:09 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: And about something so big

[8:09 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Would that affect his rs with her?

[8:09 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: Aeriel wanted to shield him from the knowledge because she believed that him knowing would damage something in him (projection) and she never wanted him to feel anything less than loved and cherished. Kid!Day might have struggled with it, because he was a kid. But teen him is more understanding. I think he would have been hurt, yes, but more than anything he would have been moved by her love for him. To him, it didn't matter so much that these faceless people didn't choose/want him, because his mom did. So does his aunt and friends and everyone so like...these people he never even met not choosing to love him meant way less than that.

[8:10 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: That makes sense. I like how Day sees it. And I can definitely see why Aeriel shielding it was because she thought he would react the same way as her

[8:11 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: I think so... it has to. But I think they patch things up a lot quicker than my other ocs

[8:12 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Definitely, they had a strong foundation and they're both attuned to each other

[8:12 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: But wow their relationship never had anything rocky before

[8:12 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: I think it's gonna the first real instance Day realises his mom isn't infallible and it's gonna shake his world

[8:12 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: and he's going to see more and more of it as he grows

[8:12 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: I was gonna ask that omg

[8:13 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: Like it's part of growing up to realize your parents are human and fallible

[8:13 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: And he never really had that

[8:14 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: but he has a lot of compassion for her so I dont think he has ever blamed her. But he starts seeing that she's not perfect and it grounds him a bit. Like this whole time he thought, one could...BE perfectly kind/good/etc everything that he values and honors. It's a bit scary for him to realise that that isn't real

[8:14 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: probably has a bit of a existential crisis

[8:14 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: this sounds unintentionally funny hahaha

[8:14 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: aww yeah i can definitely see that

[8:15 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: wow this is making him grow a little too

[8:15 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: ikr hahhaa

[8:15 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: i wonder when this happens for him

[8:16 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: that's what i was thinking

[8:16 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: like what the timeline is like

[8:16 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: his Nolan saga is already very emotionally draining i dont think he can handle both happening at the same time lol

[8:16 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: so probably not then

[8:16 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: but i feel like it's at a similar age range yknow

[8:16 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: maybe a little older? i guess i'll have to fiddle with it

[8:16 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: yeah that's what i was thinking too lol

[8:16 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: and it's not like aeriel can be there for him during the nolan saga if she has this going on

[8:17 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: so is day still going overseas?

[8:17 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: HONESTLY I DONT EVEN KNOW WHERE THE NODAY SAGA WILL GO. Cuz last I checked, Nolan finally opened up to him after they broke up and Day was already resolute in staying away from hm. They kinda just stopped contacting each other after that

[8:17 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: ohhhh

[8:17 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: i always assumed they met each other again in happenstance when they were older and it's awkward af

[8:18 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: i can't remember the noday details except that there was a lot of back and forth until they finally got together

[8:18 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: ohhh

[8:18 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: actually the whole thing with my struggle with [redacted] has made me kinda wonder if NoDay would even happen lol....... (too real) like...they have so much history and unpleasant stuff ...like why would they end up together and not with others

[8:19 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: oof

[8:19 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: i think sometimes your current situation colors things

[8:19 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: definitely my history with you made me really disbelieve in childhood friend tropes (ironically when i read bkdk and iwaoi) buuut things can change and it's just your situation

[8:19 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: yeah... noday shouldnt make me sad lol xD their back and forth is so annoying but i understand WHY also so...sometimes its just messy

[8:20 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: omg what are childhood friend tropes..

[8:20 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: there is a lot of back and forth, i remember

[8:20 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: i'm gonna sound very cynical, but just the fact that childhood friends can turn out healthy was very hard to believe to me lol

[8:20 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: Day was the one who cut it off!! good boy!! and Nolan was wracked with guilt and shame

[8:21 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: like iwaoi/bkdk and i read a few other ships with the childhood friends turned lovers and i was soo not buying it at the time hahaha but yeah things can change i guess

[8:21 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: he needs that man

[8:21 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: xD I see... thank you for sharing

[8:21 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: i read some bkdk where it happened similarly

[8:21 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: they separated for a while

[8:24 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: Nolan approached him to apologise but Day never continued engaging with him and Nolan didn't feel..like he could. So they just...yeah went off separately for a good period of time. I think when they met each other again, the old flame rekindled and they were pretty awkward about it but Nolan in particular was ...way more of what he wasn't back then. I'm just surprised Day wasn't in a relationship. Or maybe he was? But didn't work out? Idk. I know Nolan avoided relationships after. So yeah idk. It feels too real in a personal way so I don't think about it ._. which frustrates me but here we are

[8:27 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: actually if I think about it, Day was probably afraid to realise he had feelings for Nolan again because it felt very similar to the past ._. Feels like trauma man xD

[8:27 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: OOF

[8:27 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: that sucks that you can't find comfort in it and it reminds you too much of your situation

[8:28 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: i think they can work out though

[8:28 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: yeah man...they were supposed to be my COMFORT ship

[8:28 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: though maybe it's hard to work on that now

[8:28 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: yeah... ooof

[8:28 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: that really sucks

[8:28 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: (nodsnods) yeah.. kinda interesting tho to realise that this time Day is the one who's wary of his feelings

[8:28 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: like it's flipped

[8:28 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: that makes sense

[8:29 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: i mean he was all in and he got hurt a lot

[8:29 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: back then when things got too like....invested, Nolan would backpedal. Now it's Day who gets uneasy if he finds himself getting too close.

[8:29 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: https://a-friendinthedark.tumblr.com/post/664297383776124928/not-me-once-again-using-doodleface-to-create-my

[8:29 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: love that yvonne/eve contrast lol

[8:30 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: ahh i like the parallel

[8:30 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: you said that nolan was forced to woo day

[8:30 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: i like that it flips

[8:30 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: Never thought I'd see the day Nolan is unabashedly wooing Day huh.. I mean i had an idea but I didn't realise it was so....like..it has to be a very deliberate effort

[8:30 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: rather than a subtle thing

[8:30 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: OMG

[8:30 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: i think it's good though

[8:30 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: THAT YVONNE/EVE PARALELL I LOVE

[8:30 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: it's a bit like making up for what he did in the past

[8:30 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: right omg

[8:30 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: ODETTEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

[8:30 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: in mbti terms they are total opposites

[8:31 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: OMG so cool to see them

[8:31 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: and i love that when i put the icons side to side you see it

[8:31 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: AH i should put all my ships side to side

[8:31 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: wait a minute

[8:31 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: let me just edit this real quick

[8:31 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: btw do you think i should keep hal/hannah with the long hair or short hair

[8:31 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: Yeah..! I think he struggled a lot with it too but after he saw Day again and realised "that fuck, he is in love with Day, he's not going to deny it this time, he has to do it right like a man and if it fails so be it but god dammit if he doesn't fucking try"

[8:32 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: Long

[8:32 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: 'like a man' i love that HAHAHA

[8:32 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: i like the reversal, i think it's good for nolan

[8:32 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: and irl a lot of times ppl switch positions

[8:32 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: nova looks so good................. i am respectfully looking

[8:32 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: hahahaha

[8:32 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: IKR surprised at how well i could get her

[8:33 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: whatcha mean

[8:34 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: as in in relationships, people often switch 'positions' a lot

[8:35 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: also the idea of nolan wooing anyone is hilarious...im like...can you do it...... (.......actually can I do it ...omg...maybe i also dont know how to)

[8:35 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: I also wonder how that looks like hahahah

[8:36 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: Day is more grown up then actually. So I wonder how to like...connect to him. Makes me sad he doesn't trust Nolan but I can't blame him. I also wonder why they hang out together lol...if it's so awkward. Can someone write fic of them and I read it to convince myself pls

[8:39 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: oof... is it hard for you to picture?

[8:39 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: ................maybe

[8:39 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: it sounds like you have difficulty picturing it or sth

[8:39 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: i just keep thinking.............Day's a great guy...he can have so many other options. ...so why the guy who hurt him so badly in the past @_@;

[8:40 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: that makes sense

[8:40 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: does Day still have feelings for Nolan?

[8:41 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: He got over Nolan eventually. Seeing Nolan again made him feel conflicted. But I think he definitely develops renewed feelings again which scares him because he's kinda like "oh no not this again"

[8:41 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: because he literally went through it twice already

[8:42 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: so it's like he's resisting it

[8:42 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: The first he confessed, Nolan ghosted him, and when they got back together it was silently understood to never bring it up.

But then Nolan went up at kissed him after Day had already come to terms his unrequited crush and with being just friends

Then Nolan was hot-and-cold and it ended up so that Day believed Nolan just felt guilty and pretended to be into him.

 It's a MESS.

[8:42 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: Ooh that's a good way to put it.

[8:42 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: OOOOF

[8:43 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: poor day lol

[8:43 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: yeah fucking nolan man

[8:43 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: wow the last part is like

[8:43 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: that stressed guy wiping sweat emoji

[8:43 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: nolan really had the whole "I MESSED THIS UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IF ONLY I COULD GO BACK AND FIX IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" realisation lol

[8:43 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: hahahaha

[8:43 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: he shot himself in the foot there

[8:43 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: he really did...he shot himself like 3 times man

[8:44 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: day sounds like he's resisting his feelings and the rs

[8:44 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: i get now why you can't picture it

[8:44 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: this is so cool tho i never thought i'd see this from day xD

[8:44 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: well, he got burned three times technically... HAHAHA

[8:44 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: yeah.....christ xD

[8:45 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: but yeah my comfort ship is RUINED

[8:45 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: ive actually been lowkey bothered by this for months now...feels nice to actually share this with someone

[8:45 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: oh man.......... that sucks

[8:45 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: i still think they can get tgt if that helps

[8:46 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: sorry your comfort ship is like.... NOT comfort anymore ouch

[8:46 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: awww thank you for the faith sobs

[8:46 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: yeah...maybe it can change but for now...they are in the bad place with me

[8:46 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: cuz nolan's shit at courting people but also he can take a hint

[8:46 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: yeah...

[8:47 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: i mean if day is like resisting it then that's hard

[8:47 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: come back to it next time

[8:47 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: seems like now isn't a good time

[8:47 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: (flips through the agnst manuscript...what cataclysmic event can i throw at them to force them together...)

[8:47 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: hahahahah

[8:48 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: (but i dont want that xD but thats why fic writers do hahahah)

[8:48 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: yeah... xD its actually a pretty good reflection on my current emotional state in terms of my hopes and dreams

[8:48 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: ...oh that sounded....a lot darker than i realised

[8:49 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: yeah it would be kind of forced lol

[8:49 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: aww... ouch

[8:49 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: i think the ship can work

[8:49 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: though yeah i guess it isn't a good time

[8:49 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: btw does wendie have blue eyes?

[8:49 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: i decided to use doodleface to make everyone

[8:49 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: i wanted to see the contrasts lol

[9:16 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: OOH

[9:16 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: yeah she has blue eyes!

[9:16 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: not how genetics work but she has matthias' eyes and nolan has heather's lol

[9:18 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: https://a-friendinthedark.tumblr.com/post/664300458004873216/the-lin-family-unintentional-but-i-gave-jacob

[9:18 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: oooh

[9:18 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: hahaha

[9:18 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: JAVOB LOOKS SO FUKCIN CUTE

[9:18 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: it's ok i guess we can take some creative liberties lol

[9:19 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: it's our world

[9:19 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: AWWWWWW sobs i love it

[9:19 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: i'm tidying up all the many doodlefaces and posting them with relationships

[9:19 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: didnt you make aeriel before

[9:19 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: not me using doodleface again in 2021 lmao

[9:19 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: yes i did

[9:19 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: i also made double bs

[9:19 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: i'm going to collate everything and send you the links

[9:19 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: she has the same hair as eve

[9:19 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: yeah

[9:19 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: so does morrigan

[9:19 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: i remember your wendie was SPOT ON

[9:20 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: jacob is so cute my heart

[9:20 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: thank youuu

[9:20 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: I AM REMAKING STAY TUNED

[9:20 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: hYPE

[9:20 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: while i was showering i realised when Day saw Nolan again for the first time he was like "Oh no, he's still hot" in a very dismayed way in his head

[9:21 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: omg

[9:21 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: that's so funny hahaha

[9:21 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: ikr...i relate to him tho lmfao

[9:21 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: me looking at my own icarus doodleface: did i make icarus half asian??

[9:21 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: what???

[9:21 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: i like how nolan is always day's type

[9:21 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: this is what the attraction is for

[9:22 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: shortcut to get people to notice each other

[9:22 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: hahaha

[9:23 pm, 06/10/2021] Reba ♡: did i ever say before that icarus was half-asian?

[9:23 pm, 06/10/2021] r e i: I have this idea also that Nolan doesnt know how to date and he asks his mom and people around him in relationships how to court people lmao. And he attempts it all but it's so.............................not his style that he probably confuses Day a lot. I can imagine Day asking him about his weird behaviour and Nolan is very confused and kind of embarrassed/angry like "Courting you?? I thought it was obvious???" and they both pikachu face at each other lol

Also Day's naivety can really be linked to his upbringing with Aeriel. Her idealism is almost like a defense mechanism for dealing (or not dealing) with the losses she had to endure when she cut ties with her family and was dumped by Day's dad and ordered to get an abortion...... She's very idealistic and she wanted the world to be a safe, hopeful place for Day so she really did everything she could to keep it so.

which worked cuz Day grew up very optimistic, hopeful and idealistic too...but naive to a fault. Which was honestly pretty dangerous for him

cuz he didn't really have the best judgement of character

[luckylulu82]

That's true what that previousanon said look I'm the number one person if I don't fuck with you I'm not gonna hang out with you no matter what even if I was in your city and you the only person I knew there and I still had your number for some reason or I knew you on Instagram or Facebook I still will not hit you up to hang out cause I don't fuck with you and pedro look like the type to do the same so clearly aint no beef between him and paco like get over it anons ya fell for a bs lie. // I sorta disagree. I'm more in agreement with the other anon, in that I don't think Pedro hates Paco to the point that he'd ice him out completely, but I don't think Pedro is that friendly with him either. Not like the way Pedro is with some of his other pals. It's not about hating Paco, it's more about having different degrees of friendship. I just don't think Pedro and Paco are in the close friend category...or they were more friendly and now they're not. Just remember how many times Pedro liked and appreciated posts from other TUWOMT cast members and friends. Paco is one of those who suddenly stopped getting that kind of appreciation from Pedro, while others kept getting it. That's weird when you think back to how tight they were on set and on IG back in the day. Pedro obviously went cold on him at some point BUT again not to the point that he'd avoid Paco totally. Maybe just keeping a distance when he can.

Another anon brought up the point that Paco is a famous Spanish star and lives in Spain. He easily could've found out about Pedro being in town or even bumped into him from being in the same circle of friends. So if Paco asked to hang with Pedro, would Pedro be the type to say no and ignore him completely? I don't think Pedro would do that, even if Paco isn't one of his more favorite "friends". He'd hang with him I'm sure because although Paco might annoy Pedro, again it's not like Pedro totally hates him. Different degrees of friendship, you see. It's not just hate or love.

Also we can't really say that what we'd do in that situation is exactly what Pedro would do, too. Just because we'd ignore someone who annoys us or someone that we hate, that doesn't mean Pedro would do the same, especially Paco is a former costar and probably not someone he fell out extremely badly with. Actually I think Pedro is more diplomatic than that. Just my take. 🤔

From what we can see they are hanging out, it does not look like there was any icing of any nature. I can think of others who pedro has iced out so yes anon he could if he wanted to had not rekindled talking to paco but he chose to not only once but twice hang out with him. You mentioned their closeness while on set and as another anon pointed out he was also close to Jacob and from my recollection a lot of videos and photos that we got of pedro he was always with paco or Jacob, but filming ended and they went their separate ways that happens anon it does not mean a blow up had to have happened and as it appears it did not. Along with the false narrative pedro was annoyed or bothered by him I have to ask why would pedro willingly put himself into that predicament again being around paco if it were true? In my opinion and I have to repeat what we are seeing that is not the case and he and paco are fine.

[emilysshortstories]

Paul Lahote Part 2

Don’t really know what to call this, but thanks for all the love on the last part. I’m gonna try and post weekly but I work a lot so no promises.

Warnings: Angst, lots of it. cussing, hints towards abuse.

After a few weeks went by things seemed to work themselves out between Jacob and Bella. I would drive out to Emily’s about once a week, Paul conveniently never being there. Which I was actually kinda glad about, although I felt eager to be around him, Jared told me about his anger issues so I think it’s better for me to steer clear of him until this eagerness goes away. Anger issues scare me. 

Jared and I have gotten close through these visits, always laughing at each other's sarcastic jokes and ending the night with an episode of New Girl. That was usually the time when everyone else bailed but I didn’t care, it gave Jared and I some hilarious inside jokes. No matter how close we got, our feelings for each other never grew past platonic, though I would rarely catch Sam giving Jared a look. It was never all knowing “when are you going to ask her out?” look, more of a “back off” look. But that could just be me reading into it too much, there is nothing. I am thinking too much. I’m just happy I finally made a friend of my own. 

One day when I arrived at Emily’s for dinner, there was a new face in the crowd. “Y/N! You’re here!” said Emily as I walked in. “Hey! This is for you. It’s a cake for later” I said, handing her the grocery bag in my hands. “Thank you, you didn’t have to do that. This is Seth, Harry’s son.” Emily pointed to the unfamiliar face. “Hi, I’m Y/N, Charlie Swan’s niece.” I introduced myself, but Seth just kind of stared at me, never saying a word. Jared’s laughing was what broke the silence. “What are you laughing at dick nose?” I asked, hoping not to embarrass Seth. “Nothing, just your ability to woo people” 

“Very funny, I don’t woo anyone, you’re imagining things. How Emily puts up with you is beyond me.”

“IT’S NOT WITHOUT GREAT DIFFICULTY” Emily yelled from the kitchen before walking towards us. “Paul isn’t going to show up again?” she added.

“Nope” Embry said “ Too stubborn for his own good, the dumbass”

“Hey, if he doesn’t want to meet me that’s fine. It’s none of my business.” I say, hoping to ease Emily’s thoughts, seeming it always bothers her when he doesn’t show up. 

We all seemed to move past it and dinner was great, as usual. “Hey, instead of New Girl do you want to take a walk? I’ll show you the hiking trails around here.” Jared asked me.

“Sounds great” I said with a smile.

“Can I join you guys?” Seth asks like a small child which made me have to suppress a giggle. Poor boy had been staring at me all night like a lost puppy, he was cute no doubt, but being 5 years younger than me was a deal breaker. 

“No, Jared has something important to explain to her. Remember?” Sam said like he was Seth’s father. He seemed to always be incharge of everything around these guys so that didn’t surprise me. I definitely wouldn’t call them a cult, but club would be a better term, seeming as a hierarchy was apparent. 

“Seth likes you” Jared said as soon as we walked out of the house. “Wow! Way to out your friend there! Remind me to never trust you with a secret. Plus you don’t know that for certain, he just met me.” I said and Jared laughed, but didn’t say anything back. No until we were pretty deep into the woods did I ask “So what is this thing Sam said you needed to show me?” 

“Well I wanted to try and explain it to you but I have a feeling you wouldn’t believe me.”

“Your sarcasm levels are like no other to be fair, so show me.”

“Ok” he said and stopped walking. “Just brace yourself and try not to panic. I promise I won’t hurt you ok?”

“Ok” I say, trying to do what he said.

I watched. Watched him take off his shoes. Watched him back up a few feet. Watched him start to shake. Just like Paul did that day Bella slapped him. Then I watched him turn into a wolf. I was stuck. Didn’t say or do anything. I couldn’t. Just continued to watch as this wolf trotted back into the woods. My brain was blank. No thoughts, words or actions came to mind. Everyone knows the fight or flight trauma responses, but not a lot of people talk about the third: freeze. 

Jared came back, this time a human. “You okay?”. I took a deep breath and said “I’m in need of explanation please” I remembered that he wasn’t going to hurt me. 

He explained the histories, Vampires, and why he spends most of his time with the “pack”. I listened, tried to take it all in and process the copious amounts of new information, but apparently I was too quiet for Jared. “Please say something” 

“I’m alright, surprised to say the least and will need some time to process everything. But I’m not mad I promise. Thank you for telling me everything.”

“Well, that actually is not all. We just figured it would be best to wait until you’re ok with this first.” 

“There is more? Please just tell me the rest, trust me, I process better with all the information.”

“Okay, well. We can hear each other's thoughts, we are 108 degrees, and we can imprint.”

“That’s why you never wear shirts… What’s imprinting?” 

“The best way I can describe it is soulmates. When we make eye contact with them, our whole world becomes this person and we will be and do anything for them. When we are apart it’s hell, getting rejected by an imprint can really fuck you up. Make you sick. No one has ever died from being seperated from an imprint but you might as well be.”

“That sounds intense. What does that have to do with me?” 

“Paul imprinted on you. And it scared him. Still does scare him because love was never something that he wanted. That’s why he won’t see you, he isn’t mad at you. He’s in love with you and his stubbornness is eating him alive. It wouldn’t be so bad if I didn’t have to listen to his obsessive thoughts all the time.” 

“Hold on. Paul is my soulmate but he doesn't want me?”

“No, he wants you. He needs you, but he’s scared. We thought if we told you, you could convince-”

“You want me to try and convince my soulmate that he should be with me?... Fuck that. You dump all this crap on me and then tell me my own fucking soulmate doesn’t want me?!”

As if on cue, Paul came out of the woods “What did you do to her Jared? You hurt her?!”

“How do you know I’m in pain?”

“We feel our imprints' pain too” Jared added. 

“Oh! Perfect! So you can feel what you are doing to me asshole!” I couldn’t help but yell at Paul, I was overwhelmed to say the least. I’d never been so angry in my whole life. 

“What?”

“Jared didn’t hurt me, You did! What? You thought that I would be all sweet and understanding?! Awe my own fucking soulmate doesn’t want me-”

“No it’s no like that-”

“What is it? Am I not as pretty as you thought I would be? Well I can guarantee that you were not what I had in mind either you prick! In fact you are the last person I ever wanted. Oh great! Another egotistical asshole with anger issues to make me feel like shit all the time! Let me just take off my shoes so you can sweep me off my feet properly! I’m happy you got some practice keeping your distance from me. Now keep doing it! And don’t you dare think, even for a second, that you have any sort of claim over me. I’m out of here!”

Frustrated tears flowed down my face like a waterfall while my heart felt like it had died in my stomach and air was coming into my lungs but not my head. 

“Please don’t go. I had no idea you would feel this way. I can’t be separated from you anymore, I’ll go insane-”

“GOOD! Now fuck off!” I got into my car and slammed my door before Paul ran up to me window “Ok ok you can leave, just please let me drive you home. You shouldn’t be driving like this, and it’s dark. I promise I won’t say a word. Let Jared drive you! Anything.”

“Don’t tell me what to do!” My own stubbornness got the best of me and I drove away. Only this time I was dumb enough to look in the mirror to see Paul sobbing.

[missnight0wl]

I read that the events of Year 6, Chapter 18 were first uncovered under the code name "Rowan's birthday" by dataminers. With that in mind, if your theory about the Jacob found in the Buried Vault being an imposter is correct, do you think it's possible that the "Player Father" character is actually the real Jacob under a similar code name? Or, is that giving Jam City too much credit and getting our hopes up in vain?

Yeah, I remember “Rowan’s birthday”…

To be completely honest, I don’t think we’re dealing with a code name here. However, it’s not a totally ridiculous idea either, and it actually kind of bothers me. I mean, why Jam City gave the information about the Father away so easily?

Alright, here’s the thing: Jam City knows that we datamine the game. “Rowan’s birthday” is the best proof of that, but it’s not only that. They do control how much they reveal, at least to some degree. They often wait with putting in the dialogues whenever something bigger is about to happen, and I’m pretty sure that Y6Ch45 (where Merula is revealed to be the mole) wasn’t available at all, for example. We had to wait for the chapter to be released. So, what’s going on now?

I assume that they had to put this model in the game already to test the animations or whatever. But… why they called him “Player Father”? I mean, Verucca was called simply by her name. And sure, with Verucca, her connection to Merula is not obvious at all because her orange streak is usually hidden under her hat. But still.

Let’s say that they’d call him “Richard”. Considering that he’s an adult and that his outfit is very similar to vault!Jacob’s, it could’ve been concluded that he’s the Father either way. But at least it wouldn’t be so blatantly obvious! For example, it could mean that he’s simply the leader of R not related to MC, and Jacob’s outfit looks the way it does just because Jacob works for R and is so fascinated by Richard that he started copying his idol. But then, the proper chapter is released, and it’s revealed that Richard is indeed the Father! I mean, it’d be at least A LITTLE more surprising, right? And it seems that JC wants to be surprising? They’re not particularly good at it, but it appears that they try. So again, why they made such a decision?

To be fair, I do think that it’s just an odd decision. However... I suppose it makes some sense if it’s the real Jacob, too? First of all, Jacob should’ve been in his early twenties by now, so he technically should have an adult model. Admittedly, the “Player Father” looks a bit too old, but we know that JC is terrible at depicting an accurate age. There’s also no logic in the way they’re using child vs. adult models, so even if we’re ever to meet the real Jacob, it doesn’t mean he’d have to have an adult model. Still, it’s worth pointing out.

As for their outfits, I guess it still makes sense that vault!Jacob would try to copy the real Jacob. Let’s say that Jacob had more or less the same style even before he disappeared. It’d mean that it’s somewhat familiar for MC, making MC more likely to trust vault!Jacob. It’s also possible that’s why vault!Jacob looks younger: the imposter wanted to appear more like MC remembers Jacob, which again would influence their trust.

Now, I’m not gonna lie, it does feel like a stretch, and we probably shouldn’t get our hopes up. But that being said, it’s an interesting observation, and thank you for sharing it. I guess it won’t hurt to keep it in mind.

[johnkrrasinski]

dwindling, mercurial high

full masterlist

Pairings: Andy Barber x female!reader 

Word count: 2,733

Warning: SMUT!!! infidelity/cheating, age gap, unprotected sex, dirty talk, angst, lots of angst. (MUST BE 18+) 

Summary: based on the song ‘illicit affairs’ by taylor swift. things changed between you and andy, the man you’d been crushing on for the longest time, after you returned home from college. what was born from a single glance & stolen stares turned into a secret addiction, something neither of you could get sober from. 

a/n: the idea piqued my imagination after watching taylor’s folklore long pond studio session and i wondered what it’d be like to be the third person instead of the cheated one, thus this angsty fic was born. reblog & feedback are always appreciated. 

⭒☆━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━☆⭒

You closed your eyes as your back hit the wall repeatedly, you held onto him as tight as possible as you moaned in his ear. The bristle of his beard tickled your neck as he nipped your sensitive spot, causing your head to spin. The coil in your abdomen tightened, so did your legs around his waist, and you clenched around him, pushing him to thrust harder into you, chasing your orgasms. Your wailings grew louder and you cried out his name like prayer as his pace become sloppier.

Time became hazy as you plummeted into bliss while he continued to impale you, prolonging your release as well. You wanted the moment to last as long as possible as you presented your body as a vessel for him to obtain pleasure, the kind that he couldn’t get at home from his lovely wife. You didn’t mind that it took him longer to reach his peak, the comforting feeling of him being inside you was like cozying up to your favourite knit sweater and a cup of hot chocolate whilst it was raining outside.

But rains don’t last forever, and the sun was always around the corner, lurking to appear and scorch the planet once more, waking everyone up out of their comfortable place. And that’s what it was like being with Andy.

He groaned as he released deep inside you, resting his face on your shoulder while trying to catch his breath. He kissed you on the lips, claiming your mouth as you ran your fingers through his hair until he needed air. But you didn’t, because he was the air that you needed. Then he set you on your feet gently and he began putting on his clothes. “It’s stopped coming down, I should head back now, Laurie’s going to come home soon and I told her that I’d be working from home today. It’d be suspicious if I left the house without telling her.”

You nodded, “…okay.” But it wasn’t okay, how much longer were you going to have these clandestine meetings? How could you tell him that you wanted him to stay and hold you close just for once?

He slipped his feet into his shoes and untied the lace. You leaned on your hands against your study desk and watched his flushed state longingly as if you were trying to speak with your gaze and you wanted him to get the message because words would hurt both of you. He put on his coat and swung the hood over his head then stood before you, “are you okay, kid?”

No, how could you even ask me that? “Yeah.” He always asked the same question after every time you both made love but never once did you tell him the truth and he believed you. He kissed you on the forehead and there he goes, leaving you with your tears and fury once more without a single weight in his heart.

How did you end up here? It began last summer after you came back home from college. You were going to work in your father’s law firm once you finished law school and obtained your degree. Your father was a lawyer and had a good friendship with the Barbers since you were little. You even watched Jacob being born when Laurie went into labour. Besides living across from each other and worked in the same field, you were like a big sister to Jacob too. He was always a shy, introverted kid who didn’t make friends easily so Andy truly cherished your companion for his son.

You were always happy being a big sister figure to Jacob, you were both the only children so it was easy to bond over that. But what you’d never admit out loud, was also the fact that yous secretly had a crush on Jacob’s dad. What’s not to swoon over? Andy was extremely good looking, a good father and a loving husband. He was a top lawyer, courteous, soft-spoken and always treated you kindly whenever you came over.

It affected your dating life in high school because, despite all the boys asking you out, you never said yes to them. Because there was only one man that you wanted and you couldn’t have him. Even in college, you tried to forget him and seek for someone else, but even college boys couldn’t live up to Andy.

Three years went by and you finally returned home and were ready to start your career as a lawyer. Law and crimes always fascinated you because you believed that justice wasn’t as simple as black or white, or the good guy versus the bad guy so it came naturally for you to follow your father’s footsteps.

Your father invited the Barbers over for dinner to celebrate your homecoming. Laurie asked you about the college life and teased if you might’ve had dated a few boys and you nervously refuted the question by telling her that you were too busy with studying. Andy sat across you and you tried so hard not to make eye contact with him but you couldn’t fight the urge and you swore you saw him glance at you once or twice and he’d quickly look away once you caught him.

One afternoon, a couple of days after the dinner, when your father was at the court, and your mother was at her boutique, you decided to come over to the Barbers’ house. Jacob texted you earlier about his Physics homework and asked for your help on doing it. You were going to start working at the firm on Monday so you had plenty of spare time at home, doing whatever you wished for. You were bored, you had been reading books and watching Netflix all day so you decided to spend time helping Jacob with his homework.

You knocked on the door and texted him, “I’m outside.” You were a little early than the agreed time so Andy opened the door instead of the person you expected.

“Mr. Barber, hi! Is Jacob home yet?” You tried your best to keep your composure.

“No, he said he was staying for Math. He didn’t tell you?”

“Uh, he must’ve forgotten. He asked me earlier to help him with his homework and I thought I could come by early to hang out, but it’s fine, I’ll just come back later. Thanks, Mr. Barber.”

“You could come inside and wait for Jacob here if you want?” He offered.

“Um, are you sure, Mr. Barber? I don’t wanna be a bother.”

“No, please, Laurie hasn’t come home yet, and I’d appreciate the company. And just call me Andy.”

“Okay, yeah, sure. I’ve got no one to talk to at home yet, anyway. Except for my cat who only comes to me when she’s hungry.”

He chuckled at the joke as he closed the door behind you. “You want anything to drink?”

“Coffee would be nice, thank you Mr. Barber.”

He gave you a look at the nickname. “Sorry, I meant, Andy.”

“You’ve really grown since the last time I saw you, ____. You’ve even gotten good-looking.” He nonchalantly said whilst he was making your coffee. “Milk?”

“Huh?” your heart was beating fast at his flattering words. “Do you want some milk in your coffee?”

“Yes, please.” You gulped, mentally screaming at yourself to keep it together. “Are you saying that I was an ugly duckling, Andy?”

He chuckled, “no, what I meant was, your appearance definitely changed and I like it.” He served the coffee on the dining table where he laid a bunch of papers and a laptop and you tried to maintain your distance despite every cell in your body was begging for you to sit closer to him.

You hoped he couldn’t hear the way your breath hitched so you drank your coffee with shaky hands. He asked you about college or shared some advice in becoming a young lawyer. He also caught you up with stories that you missed while you were away. How he found out Jacob was bullied by this kid in his school and how he and Laurie had been arguing a lot lately.

“I’m sorry about that, Andy. But you two will work it out, what marriage doesn’t have its disputes, right? If you both had made it this far, I’m sure you can make it for many more years.”

“Thanks, ____. Be sure to keep that in mind if a guy starts a quarrel with you, okay?” He sipped his own coffee.

“I’ll have to find a guy first, I guess.”

“Are you not seeing anyone?” He gave you a quizzical look.

“No, just haven’t found the time, I guess.”

“Oh, c’mon. You’re an intelligent and attractive young woman. You should go out and explore.”

“And what if I couldn’t find one that I want, Andy?” You stirred your coffee, unable to look him in the eye.

“What do you want, ____?” He inched his face closer to you, making it hard to breathe. His ocean blue eyes bored into yours, with the kind of look that you never saw before. In this proximity, you could see how his pupils had dilated, filling the rim with darkness lust. And you didn’t question his intentions or what he was thinking but at that moment, you had never wanted him more. And you needed him. You needed him to grant your heart’s greatest desire. Him.

“You,” you voice was barely a whisper. “I want… You.”

“Say it, say it louder.”

“I want you, Andy. I’ve wanted you forever.”

Then as if the time had frozen, he slammed his lips onto yours, nearly causing your chair to fall back if only he didn’t catch you. Andy grabbed your face and kissed you with a burning passion. You shut your eyes, reeling from the swirling emotions in your stomach. It wasn’t butterflies but the whole damn zoo. Andy licked your bottom lip and you parted your mouth for him, allowing his tongue to enter and tangle itself with yours.

You whimpered and you felt Andy smirked at the way your body reacted to him. Andy then stood up and lifted you onto the table, and he slightly pulled your hair back, exposing your neck to him. He began trailing kisses there and his right hand roamed around your body until it reached the hem of your off-the-shoulder top and it travelled to your breast and he toyed with it, pinching the nipple and fondle with the globe.

“Andy…” taking your whimpers as a green light, he moved his hand down to the zipper of your jeans, fumbled with the buttons and he pulled them down just enough for his hand to caress your womanhood. Blood rushed to your cheeks when he felt your arousal. He shoved the G-string aside, allowing his fingers to stroke you.

“If I knew how much you wanted me, I would’ve made a move sooner, baby.”

The coalescence of his voice, his plump lips and his hands touching you all over nearly made you forgot where you were until the act was interrupted by Jacob’s voice from the door, “Dad, I’m home!” Andy quickly stopped his assault on you and let you go. You stood on shaky legs as you tried to smooth over your rumpled top and zip up your jeans.

Luckily, when Jacob found you both in the kitchen, he didn’t suspect anything and you followed him to his room, walking away from Andy as if nothing even happened. And that was the beginning of your doomed affair.

His infidelity carried on for months and none of you had found the strength to break it off. You knew it was wrong in so many ways. You always considered The Barbers as your second family despite your latent feelings for Andy. You’d be letting down so many people if they found out about this affair. Each time you both ran off to find escapism in a secluded place, you were consumed by guilt. Every time you told yourself that you can always stop, that he can always stop, you were choked with words. The desire has rooted itself way too deep and none of you could go back now.

It started in your room and once he’d grown weary of the atmosphere, he’d take you to a motel a little outside of town where nobody really knew who you were and it has now taken you to an empty parking lot. Andy laid on the reclined shotgun seat with his clothes off and his pants around his ankles. You leaned your hand on the window as his cock stretched you open from under.

He loved the way your breasts jiggled with each thrust. You had your shirt lifted just enough to display your breasts for him while your shorts and underwear were thrown off to the backseat. His cock was hitting your G-spot repeatedly, creating tantalizing friction. You writhed above him, screaming his name as loud as you possibly could with your mind disarrayed from his thrusts. He had both of his hands gripping your hips solidly, controlling your move as you rode him.

“After all the time I’ve fucked you, you’re still so tight,” He groaned. He moved one of his hands to breast, pinching the nipple and you mewled from the pleasurable sting. He slid his hand up to your throat, cutting off your airway, suffocating you. Your whimpers your muted but it didn’t stop you from moving up and down on him. His other hand slid under your body, he toyed with your wetness and rubbed your clit, causing you to clench around him. “You gonna cum all over my fat cock, baby?”

His filthy words never failed to arouse you. If anyone had told fifteen years old you that the man you had such admired and respect, though from afar, had a foul mouth during sex, you would’ve told them to piss off because they had no idea what the hell were they talking about, but now you had an explicit, front-row seat view of it, you couldn’t look at him any other way.

The way his cock rutted into you and the way his digits worked you over and over again, while his massive hand made you struggle for air, sent your body into overdrive and you cried out his name as if it was your salvation. Your brain was clouded with ecstasy as he continued to ram into you, chasing his own release.

You lost the power to straddle him and collapsed on top of him. Andy’s hands travelled back into your hips, locking you in place as you were pliable with your prolonged orgasm. “Fuck, I’m gonna cum too, baby.”

Then Andy emptied his seed into you, filling you up with his load, and he groaned out loud in your ear. You both tried to abate your breathing while he was still sheathed inside you. The closeness felt intimate and comforting and somehow it felt like you were committing treachery. Your limbs were intertwined and you didn’t wanna untangle yourself from him because you knew if you did, he’d drive you home and take the less travelled by road and that would be it.

There was no post-sex cuddling or aftercare. There was no murmuring soft words under a duvet and exchanging tender kisses while basking in the afterglow with him. Because that’s all this was, an illicit affair. All there was after a steamy rendezvous were quick showers to wash off traces of each other as if you didn’t even exist and a spontaneously fabricated tale so the other person wouldn’t know where the other one had truly been.

You wanted to throw things at him and scream, don’t you fucking call me kid or baby, I’m neither of those things. You wanted to hate him for the godforsaken mess he’d turned you into, but you couldn’t. Because he had shown you colours you couldn’t see with anyone else and you couldn’t erase the secret language he taught you from your mind despite the idiotic fool that he made you.

And no matter how many times you witnessed him kissing his wife like a loving spouse would and how long he made you wait for a call, you knew damn well that you’d do it all over again for him in a heartbeat.

[therealvinelle]

Vinelle (and muffin since I know they'll see this too~!), I don't know if you guys have made a post ranking the Twilight books and why (including Bree and L&D if applicable) but I'd love to hear your opinions! (also if you could rank the Twi movies from least worst to most worst and why that'd be awesome too! 030 hi key love your rants on the movies and would love to hear y'alls thoughts more on them)-Sw

You’ve caught us out, anon.

And thanks to you, we spent last night watching Breaking Dawn Part 2 so we could rank it. @theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin hadn’t seen it at all, while I half-remembered it from years ago. A terrible time was had because that movie was unwatchably bad.

Since this ask was sent jointly, our answer was co-written.

So, without further ado, movies first:

1. Twilight

This is a bad movie, but it’s recognizably a movie. The scenes are connected, there are things it did well, and we could tell you what the plot is. The awkwardness, for instance, is very well done. The weaknesses are glaring, the main one being that the film never sells us on the characters of Bella and Edward, nor on their relationship, relying instead on the audience knowing they’re in love because- well, they’re in love.

Diving deeper into Edward and Bella, there’s an understandable explanation for this. Edward of the books is terrifying, and I don’t think there’s a translation to screen that could have kept the romantic atmosphere surrounding him that we see from Bella’s point of view.

Bella can listen to Edward eating Biology and how he explains that it means how much he loves her and not blink. An actual audience hearing that dialogue will have second thoughts.

Right out of the gate, Twilight has a very difficult task: Salvage Edward Cullen while still producing a somewhat recognizable character who will take the same actions (or near the same actions) that Edward Cullen did in the book.

In the effort to make Edward palatable but save some of his original character he loses his more terrifying lines (as well as his hilarious ego) but becomes weird, awkward, and vaguely creepy. Edward Cullen of the films is that weird, friendless guy in your high school who you feel kind of bad for but don’t want to eat lunch with.

Bella faces a similar transformation. Bella’s insecurity is completely removed (or else the screenwriters somehow failed to notice it). As a result, we get this strange antisocial girl who is too cool for school because she’s a stuck up bitch.

Between Edward, this creepy guy who sits next to her in Biology, and Bella, this girl who enters school too good for everyone else, we see no reason why they would ever be interested in one another.

In an attempt to make these characters likeable they made them both unlikeable and boring. The film series as a whole never recovers from this (indeed, the quest to make Edward look good keeps leading to stranger and stranger places). 

It also forgets to explain why the Cullens live among humans, they’re attending high school… because. It’s a movie that explained to us all those terrible 2010 era memes and “still a better love story than Twilight”. And frankly, those memes were great, better than the movie. Case in point.

Everything is weirdly blue, which is atmospheric but also makes everything and everyone washed out. Everyone is super pale, so you have Mike looking just as vampire-y as Edward. However, it’s recognizably a movie. It introduces the characters, recognizes that the audience needs to be informed of things that are important to the plot, and most scenes are in some way connected to the plot. This is more than can be said for the other films, which is why it lands the top slot.

2. Eclipse

Eclipse earns its second place by process of elimination. The remaining three were worse. Eclipse also features Edward being cuckolded mercilessly, which is hilarious. Oh, and Victoria playing Riley, that was another beautiful scene.

Apart from that it’s just a deeply boring, borderline unwatchable movie.

Special shoutouts go to:

The opening scene of Riley getting turned, a ridiculous and poorly executed scene that served no purpose for the movie whatsoever.

Rosalie dropping her backstory without any context, Bella walks up to her and Rosalie launches into this horrific story for no particular reason. Both her and Jasper’s backstories could have been cut, as they served no purpose to the story and felt really thrown in there.

The many, many redundant scenes. The Victoria chase that ends with the Cullens and Quileutes squabbling could have been cut entirely. So too could the Seattle subplot with the newborns and Bree.

It’s a movie that isn’t about anything in particular, so it throws subplot spaghetti at the wall to see what sticks. It dutifully regurgitates the Jacob/Bella/Edward love triangle while also trying to convey that Bella’s about to lose her mortality, while also trying to introduce suspense and excitement with the newborns. It fails to execute either of these, and it also fails to tie them together.

3. New Moon

The movie that wanted to skip itself.

This movie had two jobs, show that Bella is depressed when Edward leaves and convince the audience of Bella and Jacob’s strong friendship. And apart the rotating shots and the occasional Stewart voiceover, the former becomes one of those “just stay with us on this one, guys” failures, and the second is failed on every level. Jake and Bella are much closer at the beginning of this movie than they were in canon, and a montage of Bella hanging out with her buddy is just that, it’s a montage of Bella hanging out with her buddy. It speaks volumes that Stewart’s voiceover has to remind us she’s depressed and Jacob is helping her heal, because there’s no indicator on screen that this is happening.

This, in turn, makes Bella/Jake as weak and unconvincing as Bella/Edward was in the previous movie. We just have to take on faith that these people are important to each other because that’s what we’re told.

There’s also the wolves, who are completely butchered. In the books, there’s this great mystery with bears in the woods, there’s Bella wondering why Laurent ran off, there’s build-up, then when we find out what’s actually been happening it’s a satisfying explanation, all the pieces come together really nicely. This is not the case in the movie. Meeting the pack is just weird in this context, because we never wondered who they were. Bella is randomly invited to breakfast, we meet Emily with the scarred face who won’t ever have a line again, and that’s it, these characters don’t become important to the movie in any way. It’s a pointless scene that could have been cut, much like so many other scenes in these movies.

Apart from that, the Volturi scene from the books is butchered so I hardly recognize it, and Alice, Carlisle, and Edward’s characters are assassinated to an impressive degree considering they were barely in the movie.

It was hard to watch.

It lands third place because somehow, Breaking Dawn was worse.

4. Breaking Dawn Part Two

I’ll just list the positives: the intro was very pretty and promised a better movie. It was also long, which we appreciated because it took away from the movie’s runtime. (This is not at all an exaggeration, a lot of the time watching all five movies was spent looking at the remaining runtime and groaning.) The Tommy Wiseau sex scene in the sex cabin was uncomfortable, but the fact that it would have fit perfectly in The Room made it funny. The Romanians were genuinely, unironically, great, because of all of Carlisle’s trashy friends, these were the only ones the movie didn’t try to convince us weren’t trashy.

This movie ranks above Breaking Dawn Part One because of the things listed above.

Apart from that, something all of these movies, but especially the last four, suffer from is that they don’t have plots so much as they have a check list of things to put in the movie before they can call it a wrap. This movie is the worst offender of that, and it’s made worse by the film’s expectation that the people are fans who already know what’s happening, and therefore don’t need anything explained. I’ll explain what we mean by that.

We get Bella waking up a vampire, and absolutely nothing is explained. If you don’t know what happened in the last movie then fuck you. Bella then goes hunting, we get the hiker, we get the mountain lion, she goes back to meet Renesmée, finds out Jake imprinted on her daughter, we get the sex cabin, the handwrestling with Emmett. The Charlie problem is introduced (poorly), only to be solved a scene later with emotional payoff that had absolutely no buildup. All of these things, and the rest of the movie as well for that matter, feels like we’re just crossing items off a list.

Since the audience is expected to already know the story, the story only bothers to explain about half of what’s happening, if half. Who’s the lady living with Charlie? If you don’t know, don’t worry because it’s not important anyway. When did Kate and Garrett fall in love? If you don’t care, that's understandable, because they’ve barely interacted in the movie. Who are the Amazonian women? Do they have names? Don’t worry about it. Did Alistair actually leave, if so did that have an impact? Well, Bella stared at a window for a few seconds.

Every so often the characters will start quoting the books, and it’ll be completely out of place because these movies veered off course long ago. Carlisle references his great friendship with Aro, a friendship that was only briefly mentioned at the beginning of the second movie. Aro randomly starts talking about how scary human technology is.

All of these scenes feel like Marcus is telling the story, he’s just listing events waiting for the story to be over, and forgets a lot of pertinent details because he doesn’t care enough to remember them. There’s no effort to tie these scenes together, no effort to build up to anything.

There’s also one significant failure, and this is a failure shared by all five films, but it affects the plot (I use the term “plot” loosely) of this movie which is why it gets a special shoutout here. Vampires in these movies look human. The fact that Bella has to ask Edward is Gianna the secretary is human says it all, because in the books you know instantly, there’s not even a question. This makes the Charlie subplot ridiculous, because Bella looks and acts the same as ever. She had a trashy makeover, maybe, but she’s still Bella. Watching her get human acting classes after we watched her act perfectly human is just silly. Now, we’re all for suspension of belief, but this movie just pencil drew a moustache on her and the audience is supposed to go “My god, Bella, I didn’t recognize you!”

We then get to the atrocious fight scene, which was somehow worse than I remembered. It was also oddly long for a giant fake out. This scene took significant run time and it turns out to have 0 effect on the plot. And when we get back to the real world, the tonal shift is extreme. You can’t go from Jane being choked, dragged across the snow and face eaten by a wolf to her standing around chilling. We could have skipped it entirely, just had Alice touch Aro’s hand, and he goes “Ah, I see, cheerio.”

The end credits were pretty funny, “here are these random characters with bit parts in previous movies, isn’t this nostalgic?”. Nice try, movie. The fact this came after an extended clip show of the great romance of Edward and Bella, through blurry montage images that failed to be convincing in their original films let alone this one, just made it even more hilarious. Hope you didn’t completely ruin the director’s career, though honestly you should a bit.

5. Breaking Dawn Part One

As you can probably tell by the above entries, the fact that this is the worst one is really saying something. All the movies were hard to watch, but this one required pure strength of will to power through.

The big issue is that Breaking Dawn shouldn’t have been split in the first place. However, it was, and that meant that we got a movie that was almost entirely filler. (Followed, somehow, by a movie that was also largely filler.)

We get everybody preparing for the wedding. What do Mike and Jessica think of Bella and Edward getting married? What’s that, you don’t care? Well, now you know anyway. We get the full wedding, as in the whole fucking thing, including the afterparty. We get Bella and Edward traveling to their island, and there’s filler in the filler where they go clubbing in Rio. We then get every minute detail of the wedding night followed by every minute detail of the honeymoon.

There’s fanservice, and then there’s this. This was live action fanfiction.

NOTHING that in any way is relevant to the story happens, the closest we get is Irina looking stoned. Too bad the Denali’ refusal to help out in Eclipse was cut from the last movie, in fact I’m not sure they were mentioned at all previously in these movies (I think maybe Edward had a one-line reference in Twilight?) so this means nothing to people who haven’t read the books.

We then get to the pregnancy arc, which could have been Rosemary’s Baby but is instead as outrageously boring as the first half of the movie was. The director must have realized as much, because he gives us Jacob’s alpha plot that should have been cut from the movie (yes, I know it was in the books, but the thing about adaptations is that things have to go. For the record, I think Meyer should have cut it too). That subplot was straight out of an anime, by the way. Jacob claiming his ancestral rights as alpha while listing off his titles and the soaring music, was… every shounen anime, ever. Complete with the shitty voice acting.

It was a soul-crushingly boring movie.

-

Something that screws over the last four movies is that they were made to feed the fangirls, and generate revenue because the producers knew the fans were coming to watch the books they liked come to life, so they just had to throw scenes from the books and into the movies and let the magic happen. This is a terrible way to adapt something.

Special shoutout too to having to watch Taylor Lautner run around shirtless in four out of five movies. That was very uncomfortable and none of us needed that in our lives, Lautner included.

Super special shoutout to the fact that we disagree with nearly all the casting.

And this isn’t the post for that, but all of the characters were butchered. Some more than others, and some more insidiously than others. It’s the big things, like Carlisle’s character being turned on its head since he thinks all vampires are damned, exactly the opposite of what he thinks in the books, and the little things, like Jasper and Bella being buddies who bicker fondly in New Moon. 

Then the books:

1. Midnight Sun

HANDS DOWN. This is easily our favorite thing to come out of the entire Twilight franchise.

Edward is every kind of crazy at the same time, all the time, and it makes every single sentence packed with delirious entertainment. Reading this book is having a stroke, a psychotic episode, and watching five different true crime shows all at once. We adore every letter of it. (That’s no exaggeration, we even laughed about Edward capitalizing “Son” when Carlisle refers to him as “son” in conversation.)

The book was more than we’d dared to hope for, one of those rare books that makes you go “This was written just for me.”

2. Twilight

The one that started it all.

Vampires are wonderfully creepy. Things like Bella staring at Carlisle acting like the mundane town doctor shortly after learning just how old he is, Alice explaining how vampires kill all, and the uncanny valley perfection of the Cullens all add to the otherness of these vampires, and the general atmosphere of the book.

The love story is convincing. Edward seen through the eyes of Bella is wonderful, the red flags are there but if it weren’t for the books that followed we wouldn’t have decried the ship the way we do.

3. Eclipse

Breaking Dawn is the more interesting book, but Eclipse has less things we outright don’t like. We get to know all the characters better, Edward and Bella are their usual beautiful selves, and it’s overall peak Twilight.

4. Breaking Dawn

Would have ranked much higher, we like what it did. Without it we wouldn’t be in this fandom now, as it brought so much amazing content. The baby plot is fine by us, Carlisle’s friends are great, the Volturi confrontation is a beautiful, if bleak culmination of preventable events. There’s a lot of great stuff in this book.

Unfortunately, and there’s just no diplomatic way to put this, so I’ll just come out with it: there’s too much Jacob.

He no longer had a reason to be in the story, given the way Eclipse ended he had every reason not to be in it. In spite of that we get an entire third of the book from his point of view, and then damned if he’s not shoehorned into the last third as well. He added absolutely nothing to the story, he was just there taking up space and being possessive of a toddler. His POV section was tough to get through, and his presence in book three was just painful. He should have been cut.

5. New Moon

This was the book we had to power through. There are some very good things in it, most notably the Volturi scene, but the Muffin and I enjoy Twilight for the vampires, and that makes Laurent and Hallucination!Edward the highlights of the part of the book where Edward is gone.

There’s also the fact that Jacob isn’t a very compelling character. He has to carry the book now that the Cullens aren’t doing it, and he simply isn’t up for it.

-

Yes, we’re aware that these books are ranked according to how much Jacob is in them. We don’t even hate him, not at all, it’s just that he’s boring.

(That being said, the books at their worst are better than the movies at their best. Jacob narrating his perfect playdate with Renesmée would still be preferable to… I’m trying to think of a good scene from the movies. Hm, nevermind.)

As for The Short Second Life of Bree Tanner and Life and Death, only I have read Bree Tanner and I don’t remember it well enough to give a proper assessment. I was bored with the OCs, though, bored to tears, throughout that book I was itching for Victoria and the Cullens. We have not read Life and Death, but we’re offended by its existence so it ranks bottom.

[wingsofanillyrian]

Lights Over Monaco: Chapter 3

Day late but here you go! Thank you to @acourtofcouture​ for beta-ing and putting up with me!

Chapter Masterlist

The six hour flight left Nesta well rested and refreshed as she checked into her hotel. She texted Jacob to check in and make sure none of his equipment had gotten lost on the flight. Having arrived a day earlier, he had been lurking around paddocks in hopes of capturing any drama on film.

He assured her everything had made it safely and informed her there were rumors flying about transmission troubles with the McLaren team. Nesta told him to keep an eye on it and unpacked her suitcase.

Nesta had just sat down when her phone rang. It was Tomas. Sighing, she decided she couldn’t avoid him forever.

“Tomas,” She answered coldly.

“About damn time you picked up the phone,” He replied, remorseless. He wasn’t earning himself any points. “What room are you in?”

She frowned. “How do you know if I’m even in Baku?”

“Doesn’t take a rocket scientist to find out flight numbers.” Interesting, he was keeping tabs on her.

“I don’t want to-”

“I said what room?”

Nesta sank back in the plush chair. Truthfully, she did want to see him, if only to determine what he had to say for himself. She couldn’t let go of the hope that somehow this was all a simple misunderstanding.

“Fourteen twelve,” She told him, instantly regretting it.

She heard him shuffling on the other end. “Five minutes.”

A knock on her door sounded a few minutes later, and she let Tomas in. “I saw the story.”

“Obviously,” Nesta scoffed, crossing her arms. Tomas reached for her but she stepped away. His eyes went bright with anger. She would not make this easy for him.

“I tried calling you.”

“I am aware.” Nesta picked at her nails to hide her trembling, trying to appear utterly nonplussed. “Did you sleep with her?”

“Yes.”

Nesta froze. Ever so slowly, her gaze slid to Tomas. Back straight, chin jutting out, staring down his nose at her. He still showed no sign of regret, nothing that would indicate he made a mistake.

“Why?” She rasped, fighting back tears. Tomas was not worth it.

He shrugged. “Because I wanted to. You and I are just fucking anyways. What does it matter?”

Nesta recoiled, blinking. “I can’t do this.” She had grossly miscalculated their entire relationship. Her palms began to sweat, her breathing increasing to a fever pitch. She pressed a hand to her chest, praying that the pressure would prevent her glass heart from shattering. Instead, it pushed the shards further into her lungs, making each breath ragged.

“Get out,” She whispered. Tomas scoffed, stepping forward.

“Nesta-”

“Out!” She repeated, more forcefully. She only needed to hold herself together for a few more seconds until he was out the door, then she could crumble.

Tomas’ face twisted. “Fine. I’ll see you at the paddock tomorrow anyway, I’m sure.”

Nesta let out a choked sob as soon as the door slammed shut. Her resolve broke, the dam inside of her punched through. Tears flowed freely down her face as she fell to her knees. She shouldn’t have loved him. 

Before they had met, she knew he was nothing but a heartbreaker. He went through women the way a drunk went through a bottle of liquor. Tomas viewed women in the same way as well; objects to be used until they were no more than empty shells and then discarded.

Nesta let the grief crash against her for a handful of minutes before she realized how useless it was. Tomas would never love her. Honestly, she wasn’t sure if he was capable of feeling such an emotion at all. There was no use letting him affect her.

Gathering her strength, Nesta stood. She looked at the sorry image in the mirror, taking in the red eyes, the mascara tracking down her cheeks, the disheveled hair. She wouldn’t let a man crush her. She had made it this far by blinding herself to the sneers and derogatory comments thrown at her. Why couldn’t she do the same to get over Tomas?

But as she climbed into bed, she realized how flawed that mentality was.

**********

Sunday’s race kept Nesta busy. Lucien and Azriel collided in lap three, causing a safety car and ultimately leading to the pair of them being unable to finish the race. Nesta had seen it on a television hanging in the Mercedes garage, the entire team letting out a collective shout when Vanserra didn’t yield to Azriel in the 90 degree turn and the Red Bull tangled with the Mercedes. Both cars were a mess of broken carbon fiber and snapped suspension bits.

Nesta managed to corner Azriel and get a few heated words out of him, a rare bit of annoyance showing through his usual calm. “Vanserra should have cut into the corner more sharply. He was way off the racing line.”

“Some people would say that you should have backed off and yielded the position to him,” Nesta added, hoping to get him worked up further. “What are your thoughts on that?”

Azriel glared at the camera, addressing anyone who dared think the incident had been his fault. “If you’re not allowed to defend, what’s racing about, then?”

Azriel turned on his heel and belined back to the garage. Jacob lowered the camera and turned to Nesta to ask, “You don’t actually believe it was Azriel’s fault, do you?”

“Of course not.” Nesta’s attention returned to the monitors and she grimaced. The racing incident had allowed Tomas to move up into first. Cassian was only a second behind, but struggling to overtake. At least she no longer had to be invested in Tomas holding his position. She couldn’t care less if he won or not.

In the end, it was Tomas taking home top points for Red Bull, Cassian bringing home 18 for Mercedes and Varian with a handful for McLaren spraying the champagne on the podium. Red Bull’s one stop strategy meant that when Cassian dipped into the pits on lap 38 for a fresh set of soft compound tires and one of the wheel nuts got stuck, Tomas was the clear winner. Cassian had no way to make up the 10 second deficit. The 25 points Tomas’ first place finish awarded him allowed him to slip past Cassian and snag the championship lead. 

And gods, was he smug about it.

Nesta told herself she didn’t care when Tomas sauntered into the press pen, his self-satisfied smile directed at her as he sat. Cassian and Varian filed in moments later, each silent as they took their seats. The room paused, Cassian’s hazel eyes flicking to where she sat front row. Everyone was waiting…. For her.

But her mind was blank. Not a single race related question surfaced. Nesta panicked, clenching a fist hard enough to feel her nails bite her palm. After a few beats of silence, the roar of the other reporters filled her head.

They had been waiting for her to ask something - anything - and she couldn’t come up with a single damned thing to say.

Jacob nudged her side. “You good?”

Nesta was too lost in the tangled web of thoughts to reply. This had all been a game to Tomas; his attitude now told her that. He had used her to gain favor with other teams and build a solid reputation with fans. After all, what better way to gain positive media attention than to have the sport’s most infamous writer in your bed?

She managed to keep her face carefully blank until the end of the conference. She didn’t say a word to Jacob as he packed up, shooting her confused glances all the while. The walls of the room pushed in on her, chest becoming tight. Standing on shaky legs, she fled down the hall, finding an abandoned alcove far from the cacophony of noise.

Chest heaving, Nesta tried to sort through her revelation. Tomas had used her. He had never intended to let this drag out. Those pictures had likely been a calculated move on his end, intended to spear her heart. Maybe breaking her had been his plan all along. He seemed to enjoy her emptiness, judging by the way he kept glancing at her during the conference. 

Her phone vibrated. Against her better judgement, she checked it. It was only Jacob, asking where she was. She only texted back to say that she was fine before gathering herself. She couldn’t just crumble in a hallway where anyone could see her.

She had just began to head towards the exit when someone jogged behind her. “Hey!”

“Not now Cassian,” Nesta said, annoyance evident. How did he always manage to find her when she wanted to be left alone? It was like he had some kind of sixth sense, focused directly on her.

“Hold on,” He said, fingers brushing her arm. The touch froze her, muscles coiling. It had only been a brief moment, but the surprise of it was enough to disarm her. “You okay? You didn’t say a word at the conference.”

Her lips peeled back in a snarl. “Why do you care?”

He did not flinch. Most would have. “Because I’m a decent person, believe it or not.” She searched his face for any sign of insincerity. She couldn’t find any; his hazel eyes held only honeyed truths.  

Nesta’s laugh was cruel, hot tears threatening to fall. “Right. Sure you are. Suddenly you feel like caring about how I feel instead of fucking with me. How about you leave me to my misery, Cassian? No need to rub it in.”

She didn’t wait for a response. Didn’t want to see the look on his face, whether it was anger or smug satisfaction, or something else entirely. 

Nesta managed to make it out and call a taxi to take her back to the hotel. She was silent the entire ride, not bothering with half-hearted small talk. Collapsing on the bed, she didn’t bother changing. She queued up a cheesy comedy film, one that was full of stupid jokes that were funny when it first came out, but not relevant in the present day.

Halfway through, Nesta grew bored and checked her phone. There was a text from an unknown number.

You okay? You never answered me.

"What the fuck," Nesta mumbled, rereading the message. How had Cassian gotten her number? 

Fine, was all she said back. She didn't know why she even bothered responding. Maybe it was because he had seemed genuinely concerned in that hallway and she felt slightly guilty for blowing him off.

I can buy you a drink if you come down to the hotel bar

Fuck off and leave me alone

Gladly.

Nesta let out a frustrated sigh and texted Jacob.

You gave him my number didn't you?

Jacob's response was only an emoji of a nervous smile.

"Little fucker," She mumbled, tossing her phone aside. She'd throttle him tomorrow on the plane. Right now, she was too hungry to send a snarky reply. If she slipped out the back, she could grab a burger without having to chance running into Cassian at the bar.

Grabbing a sweater - the desert got cold at night, she'd learned that the hard way - she made the trek down the fourteen flights of stairs, trying to piece together her life.

By the time she made it to a fast food shop, she was exhausted. She inhaled her meal in minutes, lounging in the dingy booth. She looked at her phone for what felt like the thousandth time, disappointed when there wasn’t so much as a text from Tomas.

She got up from the booth, tossed her trash in the bin and walked out. She took the long way back to the hotel, purposely winding through the streets. Why did she care if Tomas hadn’t texted her? It was her own fault that she had let herself fall for him in the first place. She knew it had been a horrible idea, and yet she had allowed herself to let him gain a place of importance in her life. They’d agreed on no feelings, and yet here she was. 

By the time she made it back to her hotel room, Nesta was exhausted. It took her three tries to fit the electronic key in the reader, and she used her full weight to shoulder the obscenely heavy door open. 

She didn’t bother with the lights, simply slipping out of her shoes and throwing her jacket in the general direction of the closet. She wanted to sleep; maybe that would reset her mind so she could feel less broken tomorrow.

“Hey-”

“Fuck!” Nesta jumped at the voice, fumbling for the lightswitch, heart in her throat. She squinted when warm light filled the room, shoulders relaxing when she saw who it was. Tomas, standing awkwardly by the desk, roses and a small box in his hands. Despite herself, hope bloomed.

“What are you doing here?” She asked, unmoving.

Setting down the bouquet, Tomas stepped forward to hand her the box. “I came to apologize. I know I missed your birthday and that I’m a shitty person. But if you open that, I think you’ll see…”

He trailed off, nodding to the present she now held. She opened the hinged black velvet, revealing a small diamond necklace. It was delicate, nothing flashy, but enough to make a statement. Nesta glanced up at him, heart warring with her head.

“Do you think showering me with pretty things will make me take you back, after what you said?”

“I think it’ll help, when paired with the fact that I-” He swallowed, trying and failing to hide his grimace. “I love you.”

Any and all sane thoughts left her head upon hearing those three precious words. Gods, she had dreamed of this moment for months. He’d only waited to tell her because it was clearly hard for him to say. But now that he’d admitted it, she could teach him how to love.

Nesta laughed, throwing her arms around his neck. “I love you too, Tomas. I always have.”

His hands rest on her back, not returning her fervor but she didn’t care. “Now will you take me back?”

The short answer was yes, absolutely. There was nothing she wanted more in the world than to wrap herself up in him and get lost. But her head knew that she needed to lay out a defense.

“Only if you promise we can make this real. If we can be together. Which means no more stunts for the cameras. I can’t keep writing about it like it’s nothing.”

Tomas tensed against her. “Fine. I can do that.”

The weight on Nesta’s chest eased. She let him lay her back on the bed, ripping at his clothes. She only let him pull away long enough for him to whisper, “I can’t stay the night.”

@aphoeni @planet-faerie  @nina-zcnik @darlinminds @linsimin @that-little-red-head @teagoddess99 @enpointe10 @electronicstrawberrystrawberry @awesomelena555 @iptneus @weesablackbeak @wonderland–memories @nessian-trash-heap @magicalwaterfall @perfectlyimpxrfect @cassians-wings @valkyrie-archeron @acourtofcouture @nesemryn @chloepereyra @toastedroastedburnt @swankii-art-teacher @illyrianshadowhunter @bakingandbooks3 @maastrash​ @candid-confetti​ @flamingveritas​ @silentquartz​ @suckmykawaiidesu​ @18moneytoad​ @frosted-crackers​ @maybekindasortaace @lysandra-tiara9 @rowaelinismyotp​ @jlinez

[we-are-inevitable]

☾ - sleep headcanon for jack or davey !!!

(hi jac, ilysm !!! hope you’re having a good day dear <3)

HI CHANDLER ILYSM2 AND I HOPE YOURE HAVING A GOOD DAY AS WELL !!!!! AHH!!!!

MOVING ON: i will answer this for both of them !!

Jack Kelly:

ok first and foremost: if this is a modern au, he ABSOLUTELY has to have a weighted blanket.

if canon era, in lieu of a weighted blanket, he sleeps best when he's not alone- so, like, if someone can cuddle him and put pressure on him, he's 100% going to sleep through the night.

that's aside from the point but oh well

he just likes having that extra security, y'know?? he hasn't had the easiest life, and sometimes that pressure is enough to make him feel safe enough to sleep through the night.

but that only applies to nighttime when he's alone, bc this boy can fall asleep anywhere. park benches, chairs, leaning up against a wall- anywhere.

it's not uncommon to see him sleeping with his forehead against a table.

he doesn't get a lot of sleep at night, so it's the next best thing.

taking this a step further: when sleeping with someone else in the bed, too, jack is the little spoon.

it doesn't matter if its a friend or an s/o, it doesn't matter if it's Kath or Davey or Crutchie or, hell, even Spot. jack is the little spoon.

also, jack would rather sleep in an ice cold room than a room that is one (1) degree too hot

David Jacobs:

davey usually sleeps pretty well, but he sleeps in the weirdest positions if he's alone.

if he's in bed with someone else, he sticks to himself- unless there's already been a conversation about whether cuddling is alright or not

davey isn't a huge fan of cuddling, just because he likes his personal space, but it's nice sometimes; especially if he's dead tired.

also, noise level doesn't bother him. like, he can sleep through anything, just because he grew up with 4 other people in a small space with him. he's trained himself to be a heavy sleeper, somehow.

davey is not a morning person. you'd think that he would be very optimistic and very "early bird gets the worm"-ish, but he really isn't. if given the chance, he would probably sleep in until 10 a.m., but nonetheless, he wakes up early and gets shit done.

he just complains about it, though. that's all.

i don't have as many headcanons about davey's sleeping habits, but i will leave you with this, which also kind of ties into the noise thing from above:

davey can't sleep in complete silence. from a young age, his bed has always been right next to the window, and he usually keeps it cracked. especially in a modern au; he loves the sounds of New York City, loves the honking cabs and the laughter from below. its almost like ,, his version of those asmr videos that put people to sleep

THANK YOU CHANDLER YOURE THE LIGHT OF MY LIFE ILY!!! MWAH !!!!!

[writerwrites]

Little Town Street

Pairing: Andy Barber x Reader

Summary: A college fling with Andy Barber is rekindled when you move back to Boston and you’re both single. 

Word Count: 3.7k

Warnings: Smut 18+, language, tinge of angst, Defending Jacob spoilers / all the warnings that would go along with the series, fleeting mentions of divorce and bad breakups

A/N: *THIS IS A ONE SHOT* This is the Week 3 prompt to the Optimistic Captain Donut Challenge created by @captainchrisbaby, @optimistic-dinosaur-nacho , and @donutloverxo​ || The Week 3 Prompt was based on  All Too Well by Taylor Swift || I’m only 3 months late, minimum || Fall dividers by @firefly-graphics​

Boston. Your heart raced just thinking about getting back to the place you went to college. The glide of the tassel across your cap and the memories of late night conversations over pizza and beer while elbow deep in a tort. You’d loved the smell of law books and the haze of the green lamps on the library’s oversized and ancient oak desks. The magic of that place was lost on you while you were there, as was the magic of the few relationships you managed to establish while getting your law degree. But here you were, the little suburban town just out of the city, boxes piling up in the empty living room as you settled into your newly single life at a small firm that liked your big New York City success. This was a needed change after a painful breakup. This was your clean break.

Covered in sweat with your hair in a messy top bun, tank top slithering up the steep curves of your soft sides while the sun kissed the back of your bronzed skin, you heard a honk at the intersection in front of your house. The unexpected sound jolted you and the heavy box of books slipped from your fingers and landed on your foot. Hopping to the steps of your new brick home, you looked over at the intersection. It was a near-accident that was the cause of the ruckus. Both cars now at a standstill at the center of the four-way intersection. It took a minute for you to process the shock as you rubbed at your aching foot, but there he was, thick brown hair and bright blue eyes looking at you through the windshield of a black Audi A6. Andy Barber.

With such a public court case and the subsequent car accident, every news-viewing American knew who he was and knew a little too much about him. The problem was that while you’d sat in your own office in the Big Apple, trying to put yourself in Andy’s shoes, you watched a person you once knew in a new light and while your now-ex kept bringing up the commentary of obvious guilt, you couldn't help but sympathize with the collapse of his life. It was too easy for you to slip into the heartache of a family stalked and ruined, a person left so completely exposed and judged by everyone that you’d trusted. It was, after all, why you’d left New York. It was a miracle you’d gotten your fresh start, the Barbers certainly didn’t. You could picture it, but you never speculated, never stayed on the channel when the case came on. Every fiber of your being couldn’t look at him, not because of what broadcasters said but because of the too real memories of a love lost.

You were the one that ended the stare-off, your foot aching more with every passing second. Jaw clenched and lips pressed into a line, you were just about to convince yourself that there was no way Andy Barber, your biggest competition in college and your first love, was outside your new home… and then you heard him say your name. God, it always sounded so good coming from his mouth. The last time you’d heard it he was asking you not to go, drunk outside the bar you’d had your first date telling you that what you two had was bigger than the careers ahead. He didn’t see the tears streaming down your face once you turned away to get in your cab. Maybe, after all this time, he thought you didn’t hear him scream your name.

When you opened your eyes Andy was there at the bottom of your driveway on that little town street, brows knit together with concern as he locked his car that was perfectly parked on the steep driveway like he’d done it a million times. “Don’t look so worried about me, Andrew. You’re the one who just nearly crashed a bajillion dollar car.”

He laughed, despite noticing how you’d used his full name like you two were standing on opposite ends of a courtroom- and maybe you were. But that laugh, the warmth of it wrapped you up and you were thrown back through the magic and memories of that romance once more. The plaid shirts you stole in the middle of the night to run to the kitchen for a midnight snack. Your skin was covered in goosebumps despite the heat as you remembered how Andy had peeled you out of his shirts to warm you back up with his skin on yours, the metal of the fridge pressed to your back. Every moment with him was crystal clear in your mind the smells of autumn and taste of cider and beer when your tongues met, the feeling of his beard scratching your thighs, and... It took his hands on your chin to pull you out of the pain and want of those happier days that you’d ignorantly run from scared of settling. “Are you sure the box didn’t land on your pretty little head?”

The sound that passed your lips was practically a damn purr, you mentally cursed him for pulling it out of you with familiar ease. Opening your eyes to look up at him, you wondered if the emotions of that tumultuous relationship sat at the forefront of his mind too and if it was written on your face. “Nope, definitely landed on my foot.” Swallowing at the sandpaper in your throat, you looked at the swollen discolored mess. “You didn’t have to see if I was okay.”

“First, yeah, I did. It’s been fifteen or sixteen years since I’ve seen you. Second, I saw you hop over here clutching your foot. I can’t leave a wounded deer on the side of the road, can I?” His hands were stubbornly placed on his hips and that’s when you noticed the pale indent of a missing wedding band on his left hand’s ring finger. His blue eyes followed your gaze and he rubbed at the spot like he’d not gotten used to the absence of the cool metal. A similar thin, faded line from a discarded engagement ring on your matching finger. “I guess we’ve both been through it.”

Offering him a small smile, he helped you up and as Andy’s strong hands clutched your waist you wondered if he’d remembered just how ticklish the space between your ribs and hip were when he was careful to not touch you there. When you grabbed at the perfectly tailored coat trying to hop around the man let out an amused grumble and scooped you up. “Aren’t we a little old for grand gestures?” Your head rolled back as you laughed and he turned to get you through the door without smacking your injured foot on the frame. “Jesus are you hitting the gym and benching thick girls, Barber?”

The laughter filling the house was only amplified by his unceremonious dropping of you onto the love seat. The crooked smile looking down at you made you melt. That look, it was a drug that you’d had you first taste of in a mock trial, when he knew he’d won his case and looked back at you in the seats behind him, taking notes. “Other than the box on the lawn, are there any more?”

“You don’t have to..”

“But I’m going to and I want to. Besides, you can’t.” Andy was already pulling off his coat, loosening his tie, and buttoning his shirt before you could protest... not that you were capable of it. He bit his lip when he caught sight of you drinking him in. The slacks and the undershirt that clung to him. “Like what you see?”

“It’s rude.” You stated matter of fact, gesturing to all of him. Andy raised his hands as if to apologize, heading to the door to get to work. Closing your eyes, you could perfectly picture that one picture of the two of you at your graduation. Inadvertently, you mumbled to yourself. “I miss looking that damn good.”

If your eyes hadn’t been closed maybe you would’ve seen the way he froze in the doorway, biting his tongue before stepping out. It wasn’t until you heard the hefty thunk of a box on the hardwood floor that you peaked your eyes open. A clear sheen of sweat glistened on his brow and you bit your lip, the heat running over your body was hardly from moving boxes or the summer heat pouring in the front door. “Please tell me the rest of it isn’t boxes of books, Legal Beagle.”

Scoffing at the old nickname you sighed, “Nope, it’s just bottles of wine and liquor and pictures. The remnants that I didn’t want to break or misplace in the moving truck that came a few days ago.”

“You’ve been here for days and you didn’t call.” His tone was surprisingly wounded.

“Well, Legal Eagle, you didn’t exactly shoot me an email either.” Andy’s eyes burned into you when you used his old nickname back, but you couldn’t decipher what that look really meant. Before you could ask or apologize he was turning back out the door, leaving you there to chew the inside of your cheek raw.

Andy made quick work of the boxes in your car while you nursed your bruised foot trying to unravel the feelings bubbling to the surface of your mind in memories and regrets. When the front door shut, you couldn’t even bring yourself to look up, eyes fixed on the bruise while you thought about the emotional bruising you’d caused each other. It wasn’t hard to really know why he hadn’t emailed, nothing funny in the broken pieces you bother were left to pack up and move on from. When had you started crying? Cheeks wet when his hands cupped your face, forcing you to look up at him, thumbs brushing the tears away. “Hey, if it hurts that bad maybe we should take you to get it looked at.”

Reaching up you grabbed Andy’s wrists, but you found yourself hanging there, incapable of pulling him off of you. Instead, your thumbs brushed across the inside of his wrists just applying a little bit of pressure before skimming your hands up the firm muscles of Andy’s forearms. Each of you tried to translate the signals the other was putting off. If it hadn’t been for the haze of being so close to him, maybe you would’ve had the sense to pull away. With a sniffle and apologetic smile you shook your head ‘no’- or at least to the best of your ability when he was still comforting you like no time or pain had passed between the two of you. How long had you been holding on to this first love?

This close you could see it, the little creases of age at the corners of his eyes and a little salt and pepper in his beard. Despite the way those lines seemed to crease his face like words of chapters you’d not been privy to, his blue gaze was unchanged and every welcoming detail of them looked at you like you hadn’t changed either. The moment his knee pressed between your thighs to your core you realized just how needy you were, whimpering and parting your legs as he lowered himself onto you. His hands moved down your neck to your breasts and a firm squeeze and the brush of his thumb over your nipples elicited another breathy moan from your lips. How long had it been since anyone had looked at you like that? How long since you’d gotten off?

“Andy,” The weight of his name on your tongue was dizzying, but the way he said your name back was just as heavy. You pulled his mouth to yours and he parted his lips to wrap around  your bottom lip. His beard scratched at your chin, sending shivers down your body.

Picking your hips up from the couch, you satisfied the ache between your legs on his thigh. Smirking against your lips Andy pressed harder into your core. “You missed me.”

“To the bone,” The confession passed your lips and all you wanted was for him to stay, the thought alone so wholly selfish. Your eyes fluttered open, scared that it had been poison on his own tongue, noticing how he’d pulled away ever so slightly. “That wasn’t fair.”

Though it seemed like a poor apology, Andy was already shaking his head to reassure you that it wasn’t. That quiet, it wasn’t a trait in him you recalled. His hands moved down your frame and he pulled you onto his lap, careful to let you move your legs to straddle him and not hit your foot along the way. “Did you think I wouldn’t care that you were coming back?”

Before you could answer, he stole your air again. Andy’s lips pressed to your neck and he hummed as he tasted the salt on your skin. Then he found the spot he used to always mark, that spot that always seemed to peak just a little out of your favorite courtroom blouse. Gasping, your nails scratched softly at his sides. He took it as a hint and pulled off his undershirt, throwing it at the boxes that had his tie, coat, and button up. “Andrew. I’m trying not to assume anything here but…”

He looked up at you so sweetly that it erased whatever logic you were trying to pull on him with that one dopey smile. “Tell me this isn’t home.”

“I..” Your mouth bobbed open and you looked at him with wide eyes. Did he mean Boston or this moment on his lap like pieces were falling into place since you’d left.

Squeezing your thighs in his palms he repeated the question. “Tell me this isn’t home. Tell me you don’t remember the promise you broke. Tell me those boxes with pictures don’t have the pictures of us all over this town.” Was this a call out? If he hadn’t been looking at you with such heartache you would have looked away. “Maybe I asked for too much and maybe I was just as scared as you were about the future I saw for us… but tell me we didn’t just find our time.”

The tips of your fingers moved up his chest and settled at the sides of his neck, innocently tugging at his beard. Leaning forward you pressed your lips to his forehead and slipped off of his lap though your whole body seemed almost unamused by the cruel neglect of his warmth, your legs staying draped over him and one arm still linked through his. Looking over the boxes you found the stack with the bright blue sharpie, ‘winter clothes’ sprawled across the top as it sat halfway between the bottom of the stairs and the closet by the front door. “Grab that one.”

Andy untangled himself from you with his fingers burning across your skin, reluctantly slipping off the couch to grab the box. When he came back with it you noticed a hesitant look on his face. His eyes moved to his discarded clothes and you sighed and pulled him back to the small couch. “Want to tell me why you’re avoiding my questions?” Ignoring him you peeled the box open and moved a few things out of the way while you pulled out exactly what you knew you needed. “I don’t break over honesty anymo-”

Words seemed to escape him the moment he saw his scarf from the first time he’d gone home with you to meet your family. He didn’t do the meet-the-parents charade and the relationship had been new, but yours had welcomed him in and made him want his own one day. Andy never thought he’d settle with someone else, but that’s exactly what he’d done when you didn’t call, write, visit, or move back… he’d settled. That little trip was a memory he’d revisited often in the torment of waiting for you to come back. The pair of you had spent most of the holiday either studying for exams on your twin sized bed or pouring over old photographs from your childhood. Now you could practically see the memories flooding back as he reached for the scarf and brushed his fingers over the soft fabric.

So, it was your turn for a confession, an apology even. “I remember it all. I miss it all. We may have been young, but we weren’t wrong. No one knew me like you did. No one ever has. We grew up, but you lingered here.” Your fingers combed through his hair and tapped his temple before moving down his body to his sternum, tapping at his pulse, “... and here.” Andy covered your hand in his, drawing your fingers lower to the buckle of his slacks. Your cheeks went red and you nodded a ‘there too’ without being able to form the words.

“Do I get a hundredth chance?” The hope in his eyes was mirrored in your own, your racing heart no longer felt like a warning sign.

“Shouldn’t I be asking you that?” A shaky laugh passed your lips. Andy wrapped his arms around you, tender, before he laughed too, his body shaking against yours. “Oh, this is a prank? Well, damn. That’s embarrassing.”

Andy looked at you and lunging forward, mouths ricocheting in a deep kiss, tongues hungry for the lost time. Only when you came up for air, the pair of you now buried in the couch cushions, did he speak up, “You deserve all the hell I’m going to give you for waiting this long to let me love you.”

“Does that mean you’re going to stay and rub my skin raw with this beard?” Squirming under him, the pair of you frantically reached for every clasp and zipper until there was nothing left between you. His lips moved down your frame and you surprised yourself, pulling him back to your mouth. “You’re staying with me Andy Barber.” Your fingers wrapped around his length and pumped him, brushing the head of his cock against your slit, already dripping. “You’re staying so beard on thighs can wait.” Pressing your mouth back to his as you continued to tease him you whimpered, not even needing to say it but recalling how much he used to love hearing it. “I need you. Don’t make me wait anymore. I need to feel all of you. I miss-”

The begging and pawing, he couldn’t take you slowly, not yet at least. Andy rutted himself into you, growling when your tight wet heat wrapped around him. He buried his forehead into the curve of your neck as he thrust into you over and over, savoring the way you gasped at his every slight movement. Andy worshiped the new softness of your frame and none of this felt like strangers trying to figure out how to get each other off. His thumb brushed back and forth across your swollen clit and, unlike anyone else, you stuttered his name as you got closer, clamping around him, hips bucking off the couch to meet every deep thrust as he slowed his pace to draw this out for both of you.

You loved the look on his face, the way he bit his swollen lips between a million kisses left on your sweaty skin. The way he lost focus when you said his name and how he gently grabbed your chin as you stuttered his name again; so close, so wet for him, so ready to finally get off. Permission, your legs shook and you whined as he kept you right there at the tipping point, building himself up to his own orgasm while he edged you. “Come for me, lover.”

The words were so welcome, just enough to push you over the edge and quickly chased by you begging him, “Stay inside me.” Andy throbbed inside you as you pulsed around his cock, your fingers digging into the meat of his thighs as your orgasm didn’t seem to stop, the room seemingly silent as the echoing thrusts and calling out of names tapered out to the sticky collapse of you both tangled up on the love seat.

Your eyes closed, exhaustion settling in, and Andy watched you breathing. Softly, Andy nuzzled his nose against the top of your head. “If you fall asleep, I’ll fall asleep.”

With a hum you nodded, reaching up to his hand that had settled on your breast, patting it, “Would that be so bad?”

More to himself, voice so low you almost couldn’t hear him. “I can’t lose you again. Can’t lose anyone else.”

“There’s probably a lot we can’t talk about, but this isn’t a dream, Andy.” Pivoting just enough to look at him you held his hand and kissed his chin. “I can’t lose you again either. I already lost a foot.”

There it was, that cheeky little smile. You both sleepy laughed and you watched his body relax. “You almost cost me my car.”

“I couldn’t run away again, even if I wanted to.” Crinkling your nose you smiled, brushing your finger over the smooth part of his skin where the missing ring marked him. He did the same. The scarf hung over the back of the sofa and looked up at him. “I don’t want to, if that wasn’t obvious.”

His blue eyes closed, his smile went soft, and Andy Barber fell asleep in your arms. If someone would have told you that this would have happened when you left New York you would have run back to Boston and spared the pair of you a world of pain. Though you were scared of bridging the gaps caused by the many roads the pair of you had taken to get here, you shut your eyes and smile at the reality that all those roads led home- to him. Like kintsugi everything seemed hopeful, incapable of breaking like the last time, stronger and made beautiful through the healing time of quiet apologies, verbal and physical.

It had been him all along, no denying it. Neither of you would ever have to ask the other to stay again.

All Content Tags: @tom-hlover​

CEvans Content Tags: @void-hoechlin​

[bellaireland1981]

New Beginnings: Ch 3

Characters: Andy Barber x Single Mom! Briella James (Named Reader), Jacob Barber, Ava James

Summary: Briella James is a HS teacher and has Jacob in her class. Jacob meets Briella’s 5 year old daughter and they form a bond. Andy is interested in Briella but her ex (and Ava’s dad) is becoming a problem!

Warnings: Mostly fluff, some angst, jerk of an ex that harasses Briella… will update in future chapters.

word count: 1922

A/N: I do Not own Andy Barber or Jacob Barber, they are fictional characters. I do not give permission for anyone to repost my work or translate it to another site. Reblogs always welcome!   This is my FIRST EVER attempt at writing for Andy…or any character, so be gentle!  THANK YOU to my friends for supporting me and encouraging me! I’m my own worst critic so I love their feedback! @denisemarieangelina​ @fluffymisha97​ @jamielea81​

Chapter 1   Chapter 2  Chapter 3 (?)

Ava had gone to bed without any complaint the night before. Spending all day at the zoo and getting ice cream had worn her out. After she went to bed you’d had time to sit and think about what Andy had said. You knew he was probably right about you ex, you were just scared to further set him off. Up to this point, he’d pretty much left you alone. You worried that if you pressed the issue, he’d make trouble for you or worse, for Ava.

You also had to admit that you’d very much enjoyed spending the day with Andy. He was easy to talk to and fun to be around. He was an amazing dad to Jacob and was sweet in his interactions with Ava. While you definitely enjoyed his company, you were still unsure whether or not he would be interested in anything other than just being friends, and if he was, was dating the father of one of your student’s a good idea?

With everything running through your head, you didn’t get much sleep. You dragged yourself out of bed when you heard Ava get up, slowly making your way to the kitchen. She was already on the couch watching cartoons, so you decided to take advantage and start the coffee before getting her some breakfast.

After your coffee was ready, you poured yourself a cup and then set to making Ava some French Toast and Scrambled eggs. While you were cooking, you heard your phone ping with new messages but decided they could wait, assuming it was just your ex again.

“Ava, come eat breakfast,” You called her once the food was done. “You have to eat and get ready, Papa will be picking you up soon.”

“Yay! I can’t wait to tell Papa about the zoo! And Jacob and his daddy!” She said excitedly. She came in and sat down at the counter and started eating her breakfast.

“I’m sure he’ll love to hear all about the zoo, Monkey.” You confirmed. And later, you were sure to get the third degree about Andy and Jacob. Sometimes you wished your brother and sister in law lived closer so that your parents could fuss over them once in a while.

“Mommy?” Ave asked, swallowing a mouthful of her French toast, “When can I see Jacob and his daddy again?”

“I don’t know, Babygirl” You replied, “I’m glad you had fun with them though.”

“I did!” She said, “I wish Jacob was my brother. Katie, at school, always talks about her brother and they do fun stuff together.”

You weren’t entirely sure how to respond to that. Your heart broke that she didn’t have a sibling. You knew how nice it was growing up with your own brother. Ava didn’t even have cousins that lived close. Thankfully, your dad arrived, which saved you from having to come up with a response.

“Good morning, Sweetheart.” Your dad said, entering the kitchen, “Morning, Ava Bug! Are you ready to go out on the boat?”

“Yup!” She said, happily, “I’m ready!”

“Go grab your jacket and put your shoes on, Monkey.” You instructed her.

While Ava got her jacket and shoes on, you placed her plate in the dishwasher and wiped down the counter.

“What are your plans today?” Your dad asked.

“I’m going to go get groceries and then come back and get some stuff done around the house.” You replied, “I’ve got some grading I should catch up too.”

“Try to do something that’s just for you, Sweetheart,” He said, hugging you, “It’s ok, to do things for yourself too, doesn’t make you a bad mom, teacher, or daughter.”

“Thanks, Dad.” You replied smiling, “I will try to squeeze some me time in there as well.”

“We’re happy to keep Ava Bug overnight, if you want to get out with other adults and paint the town red.”

“I’m not in my twenties anymore dad” You laughed, “No need to go out drinking or partying with friends. The recovery takes too long now.”

“The offer still stands” He insisted, “Being the only grandchild in the state, we’re more than happy to spoil her.”

“She’s more than happy to let you!” You said, shaking your head.

Ava came bounding back into the room, declaring she was ready and all but dragged your dad out the door. After quick hugs and a reminder to her to listen, they were off for their adventure.

Once they were out the door, you grabbed your phone to look at the missed text messages and phone calls.

You read through the texts, seeing that they were all from your ex. You were starting to get worried with the increase in calls and texts from him. He was clearly escalating. You took a deep breath to calm your nerves.

You decided to go get dressed and try to clear your head before making a decision on what to do about the texts and calls. You’d promised Andy you’d think about taking actions to get your ex to stop harassing you, and you had to admit he was probably right.  

By the time you got dressed and brushed through your hair, you’d made the decision to go about your day as planned, and you would reach out to Andy in an email on Monday.

You grabbed your car keys and purse, tucking your phone in your pocket and made your way out to your car. You blasted your upbeat playlist, hoping it would work to calm the remaining nerves before you got to the grocery store.

You were able to get the shopping done in record time without having to negotiate all the treats with Ava. You had a feeling she’d make a great lawyer someday. With the shopping done, you decided to reward yourself and grab a coffee from the small coffee shop around the corner from the grocery store.

As you stood in line, you heard your phone ding several times, alerting you to new messages. You pulled your phone out to check, and felt your anxiety increase again. You sent a text back asking to be left alone, knowing he’d ignore it.

“Fancy running into you here” A voice sounded behind you, startling you and causing you to flinch. “Woah, Brielle, are you ok?”

Finally recognizing the voice, you turned around, taking a deep breath and trying to calm your racing heart.

“Andy,” You replied, quietly, “Yeah, I’m fine. Sorry about that, I wasn’t paying attention so missed when you came in.”

“You do realize I’m a lawyer, and can see right through that right?” He said gently, “You’re showing all the classic signs of distress. How about you have a seat while I get us coffees and then you can tell me what’s causing that distress.”

“I appreciate the offer,” You replied, “I have groceries in the car though, and wasn’t planning on staying.”

“I don’t think driving when you’re upset is a great idea either,” He reasoned, “It’s cool enough, the groceries should be fine while you have one cup of coffee.”

“Ok,” You smiled, softly, “You’re pretty good at bargaining.”

“Professional hazard” he joked, “What would you like? And before you argue, I’m buying the coffee and you’re going to sit and breathe.”

“Yes, Sir,” you smiled, “Mocha Latte, please.”

“Coming right up” He said, smiling warmly, “Grab us a table.”  

You quickly found a table in one of the corners, figuring Andy would be grilling you over why you were upset, you didn’t want the rest of the cafe to hear the conversation.

Andy set your coffee down in front of you and took a seat in the chair next to you.

“Thank you” You said, placing your hands around the warm up.

“You’re welcome” He replied, “How many more messages have you gotten from him?”

“Today? Or since you read the messages yesterday?” You asked to clarify, but mostly to stall.

“Sweetheart, if you have to ask that, it’s time to put a stop to it.” He said gently. Your heart fluttered at the endearment.

“I’ve gotten 9 more texts and 4 voicemails just since this morning.” You admitted, “I sent a text back asking him to stop, but I’m guessing that’s not going to be effective.”

“Probably not,” He agreed, “But it’s a good first step. Are the texts the same as yesterday or more aggressive?”

“They’re the same, just more frequent.” You said, “Honestly, I just want him to leave me alone. I don’t want to have to worry about him suddenly popping up or worry about if he’s going to demand to see Ava.”

“Are you willing to let me help you?” He asked gently.

“If you’re sure it’s not a bother…” You said, giving in, “I would very much appreciate the help.”

“I wouldn’t have offered if I didn’t want to help,” He assured you, “Besides, my motives are purely selfish.”

“How so?” You asked, smiling.

“It gives me a reason to see more of you, which hopefully leads to us getting to know one another more, and in the interest of full disclosure, once this is all cleared up, I’m going to ask you for a date.” He admitted, smiling.

“In the interest of full disclosure,” You replied, “once this is all cleared up, I’ll probably say yes.”

“Probably?” He asked, laughing, “I can work with that.”

“You may have to run it by the boss…” you teased, “She’ll probably grill you on your knowledge of Disney Princesses.”

“I better do some research then.” He said, “I want to make sure I can pass with flying colors.”

“Ava was asking this morning when she can see Jacob again.” You said, “Seems she is very taken with him.” You left out the part about her wishing he was her brother.

“How would you feel about Jake and I coming to your house tomorrow?” He suggested, “He can keep Ava occupied while we sort through paperwork so I can get it done and filed with the court on Monday?”

“The only way I will agree to be the reason you have to work on a Sunday is if you at least let me cook you and Jacob dinner.” You bargained.

“You drive a hard bargain,” he joked, “I will happily accept those terms.”

“Any food allergies or aversions” You asked, “I was thinking about making lasagna tomorrow.”

“Jake and I eat pretty much anything.” he confirmed, “And lasagna sounds like Heaven.”

“I’ll plan on dinner then for around 5:30, but you are welcome to come any time.” You said, “And really, I cannot thank you enough for this.”

“No thanks are needed,” He said, “I’ve already admitted this is purely selfish on my part. Jake and I will come around 3:30, we’ll want to make sure Miss. Ava gets enough hang out time with Jake.”

“You’ll be her new favorite person.” You teased, “3:30 is perfect.”

“I’ve heard she’s the one I need to impress anyway in order to gain approval to ask her mom out.” He winked. “In the meantime, try not to look at messages from your ex or stress over the calls. We’ll get it all worked out soon. And do not say ‘thank you’ again!” he laughed, see you opening your mouth to do just that.

Andy walked you out to your car and you said your goodbyes before heading home to get groceries put away and laundry sorted. You were very much looking forward to dinner the next day.  

@waywardodysseys​ @nickysurfer28​

[musingsofanunorgainizedmind]

Top 10 Things I Love About Supernatural

It’s been almost half a year since the show ended and now that the dust has settlIed, I just want to list ten reasons I love this show. Despite it’s flaws, it’s been quite the ride.

1. Team Free Will

When I first got the idea to make this list, I originally planned on doing entirely separate entries for “Sam & Dean” and “Destiel”. Except then I wanted to pay tribute to “Sastiel”. And then I wanted to do an entry for “Team Free Dads”. By that point, I was already halfway through the list and I hadn’t even moved on from the main characters. A few months ago, I made a post about why I love every single pairing in this group. Obviously, Sam and Dean are a legendary duo. Obviously, Dean and Cas have an unparalleled story. Obviously, Sam and Cas are an underrated team. As for Team Free Dads, I’ve always had a soft spot for father/mentor figure characters and and all three tackle the role in different ways. I love Jack, too. I love how everyone in this bizarro family is “broken” in some way. We’ve got the Allistair’s prized pupil, the spawn of satan, the boy with demon blood, and the angel who nearly obliterated all of heaven. But they help each other heal by being supportive and seeing the good in each other. They all love each other so deeply and when together, nothing can stand in their way. Not Michael, not Lucifer, and not God himself. They tore up the book and wrote their own story. And it was a pleasure to watch it all unfold.

2. The Suppporting Characters

To list every single supporting character I have loved and lost in this show would take way too long. I don’t know if it’s the writing or acting performances, but I love pretty much every single supporting character on this show. Even villains like Azazel or Allistair are top-notch villains. Hell, I even like characters like Metatron, Lucifer, Mary, and John! Characters like Rufus, Charlie, Crowley, Rowena, Kevin, Ellen, Jo, Bobby, Gabriel, Balthazar, Mick...how am I not supposed to love them??? All of their stories were cut so short. I’d watch a show about any of these characters. The Wayward Sisters were robbed. So many ships were gone too soon (Sam/Rowena, Dean/Jo, Cas/Meg, Etc.). So many heartbreaking deaths. I want to be best friends with all these characters. Why be a “dean-girl” or a “sam-girl” when you can be a garth-girl? A kevin-girl? A claire-girl? A bela-girl? There are so many great characters with interesting and compelling backstories and so much untapped potential. I could go on forever on this, but I digress.This show has one of the best supporting casts I have ever had the pleasure of watching.

3. The Themes

It’s no accident that I got addicted to this show at the time that I did. Namely, my Senior Year of College and 2020. Graduating college and entering the “real world” felt like it’s own sort of apocalypse. 2020 definitely exacerbated my worst tendencies. Messages like “family don’t end in blood”, “you can write your own story”, and “always keep fighting” really resonated with me. I could definitely relate to the feelings of insecurity these character’s felt and the ways they suppressed/repressed their issues instead of facing them. I could relate to the feelings of not fitting in and I could definitely relate to the loneliness. This show helped remind me that I’m not alone. That it’s okay if my values and identity don’t line up with the what I envisioned for myself. And, most importantly, that there is a light at the end of the tunnel and that I should never give up. If Dean, Sam, and Cas can keep moving forward despite their demons and despite how bad it gets, so can I. Regardless of how the story ended, these themes resonated with me and I’ll still hold them with me. A single episode can’t take that away.

4. The Fun Episodes

This show has so many legendary standalone episodes. Changing Channels. Ghostfacers. The French Mistake. Fan Fiction. Tall Tales. Bad Day at Black Rock. When this show goes for the absurd, it goes all-in. It takes the risks it needs to take, it gets completely insane, and it pulls it off. So many of these episodes could have easily been the moment that the show “jumped the shark”. Yet, time after time, the show delivered on it’s potential. I don’t know how much I can say about these episodes except that they made me laugh out loud, made me fall even harder for these characters, and that they’re the episodes I remember best. If I were to rewatch any episode, it would be one of the fun ones. This show knew how to not take itself too seriously and how to poke fun at itself. I’ve always had a soft spot for shows that can make me laugh and cry (X-Files, Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Angel, Doctor Who, etc.), and this show definitely nails the fun part. 

5. The Sad Episodes

Death’s Door. Hammer of the Gods. Despair. Carry On. Abandon All Hope. In My Time of Dying. Swan Song. When this show wants you to cry, it doesn’t pull the punches. It gets downright devastating. No character is safe. Literally every character you love will either be forgotten or will die. Or both. The amount of trauma Sam and Dean have to go through is insane. Both have literally been to hell and back. Both have killed countless people, including innocents. When this show decides it wants to wreck you, it’s overwhelming. I sobbed when Bobby died. I sobbed when every single member of Team Free Will died for the final time (I still can’t watch any of those scenes). I still wish Jo, Ellen, Charlie, Kevin, Mick, and Gabriel had been given more time to tell their stories. Being a hunter means a life of endless angst. Being an angel or demon doesn’t get you off the hook, either. I remember going into this show thinking it couldn’t hurt me. My favorite character type is “mentor/father figure”. But holy hell...I don’t think every single sad moment was necessarily good writing, but when it was? Damn. 

6. The Biblical Themes

I’m not a relgious person. But, despite this show being steeped in Christian mythology, it really touched on my feelings about the Old Testament in a profound way. Well, really just Ben Edlund and Robbie Thompson did. I’ve never seen a show really hit the overall feel of the bible the way this show does. The idea of Angels as mystical and terrifying creatures. The idea of God as a flawed father figure with a penchant for wrath. The sheer epicness of the biblical stories. The idea of family members constantly being turned on each other. Cain and Abel. Jacob and Essau. Moses and Ramses. Moses and Aaron. Abraham and Isaac. The bible is full of stories of family drama. This show doesn’t always give angels and demons weight. Sometimes it’s silly and stupid and cheesy. But when it hits right? It’s epic. This is more of a personal thing I love about the show, but definitely a plus!

7. The Music

The early seasons music is so good. I really miss the classic rock of the golden era of the show. I mean, there are still some great musical moments later on, but damn. I loved hearing songs I recognized and I loved learning new songs. I loved when the song and the scene hit perfectly in time (Death’s intro. Cas’s return in Season 13.). Also Supernatural wouldn’t be Supernatural without the ‘Carry On My Wayward Son’ song at the end of every season. Even at the end of a season I didn’t love, that recap would always get me pumped. Also Chuck singing Fare Thee Well? Dean and Lee singing together? Fan Fiction? All great. 

8. The Cast & Crew

I never care about the actors or actresses in a show. I definitely don’t bother with the names of specific writers and directors or their styles of writing/directing. They’re just random people who happen to write for or play these characters I love. They’re not actually the characters. But these guys? Well, for one, I’m pretty sure half this cast actually is their character. At least to some degree. They’re also just...really cool people? Who are all friends? They make a point to do community service, to interact with fans, and to promote positive ideas. Jared’s Always Keep Fighting campaign. Misha and GISH. The fact that they all participate in fundraising opportunities and encourage fan engagement. Do they all have issues? Definitely. Have they said stupid things? Yes. But the good far outweighs the bad. They’re an entertaining bunch whether onscreen or not and I hope they all do well in whatever their future endeavors may be.  

9. The Fandom

I joined this fandom late. To be honest, I thought this fandom was obnoxious before I found myself a part of it. Now that I’ve been in the trenches? It’s got it’s ups and downs like any fandom. There are some parts that are more toxic than others. A lot of people yelling that their opinion is the only opinion. But overall? The good outweighs the bad. And the good? The good is great. Some fanfictions I’ve read are better than actual books I’ve read and just as moving. The fanart? Incredible. I love reading all the metas about random aspects of the show I never would have noticed. I love the music videos and I love the analytical videos. In real life, I’ve made many friends through our mutual love of this show. Hell, even getting sucked into GISH once or twice has given me some solid memories and brought me closer to friends. I wish all fandoms were this much like family. I’m so glad I got to be a part of this fandom and I can’t wait to continue being a fan. After all, nothing ever stays dead in Supernatural.

10. The Chaos & Insanity

Season 16 has been a time. First, Destiel went canon. Then suddenly Sherlock was having a 5th season, Putin was retiring, and Georgia was going blue. Destiel going “canon” and Joe Biden winning the presidency will always be correlated in my mind now. Things in the fandom went from quiet to blaringly loud real fast. Carry On happened. The fandom went into a civil war. I can’t even remember half of what happened in Season 16, but it’s been a wild ride. There’s been ups (my personal favorite being the french dub and the Saileen wedding). There’s been downs (Jared’s controversial statements and the original scripts being leaked). At one point Misha Collins had sex with Bill Clinton???? It’s been a wild time. It’s honestly gotten me through the end of this pandemic. At least it’s entertaining. I would say that at least all the craziness is over, but is it ever really over? Every time I say that something else completely insane happens. But it’s been fun. I’m glad I started watching this show despite my reservations and here’s to whatever happens next. 

[third-generation-female-warrior]

The Path we Walk

Talbott x Ravenclaw!Alexus oneshot

I just wanna see if anyone wants to read my writing (4,318 words) They’re idiots in love, you’re honor, with one count mutual pining in the 1st degree, and multiple accounts of angst/comfort in the 2nd degree.

Talbott Winger had never been an emotional person. Ever since he lost his parents when he was a child, he had no need nor want for emotions, or attachments to other people for that matter. He didn’t want that pain again.

So when Mr. Winger found himself feeling a romantic pull towards Alexus Johnson, a Ravenclaw girl in his year, he was torn perfectly between fear and annoyance.

He hadn’t initially thought there wasn’t anything remarkable about Alexus when he first met her when she was inquiring about being an animagus. Now, he knew otherwise. She was determined and clever, almost dangerously so. She had an annoying determination to be his friend, a dedication to him that had become endearing over time. He looked at her, and he saw someone he actually trusted, someone he let himself care about before he realized he cared about her. He furiously reflected on remarkable Alexus as he trudged up the snowy steps to the Owlery.

‘She’s annoying,’ he thought. ‘She’s insufferable, persistent. Too persistent. She’s quiet, comfortingly so. Clever. Too clever and too kind to the point where she seamlessly weaved through the obstacles and barriers that I had put up to keep the rest of the world out. Clever to where she could match wits with me, I didn’t even know I admired that…’

Talbott nearly screamed in frustration. As much as his head told him to resist, as much as he was reluctant to allow it, he’d only get hurt again, Alexus had definitely become one of his best friends before she became someone he was attracted to. Her closeness to him only intensified his feelings and he wasn’t sure if he hated it.

He shoved his hands into his pockets as he reached the entry to the Owlery. He looked forward only in time to see a face right before he collided into that person, chin first.

He stumbled back, clutching his jaw, brief yelling muffled into his palms. He glared down at the person who had stumbled back opposite to him. Then his expression softened when he saw that it was, of course, Alexus Johnson, like his life was a cliché novel that he himself wouldn’t bother to read.

But he didn’t let her see the waiver in the mask he wore, hardening his expression again into that of annoyance.

“I should have known it was you,” he snapped.

“Oh, sod off and watch where you’re going,” Alexus retorted, holding a hand to her forehead. That must have been where his chin collided, which made sense, since, not only was he considerably taller than most students, but she was rather shorter than most their year. This had led to more than one occasion of him daydreaming about holding her in his arms so she could tuck her head perfectly under his chin.

He let a small smirk cross his sharp face as he looked at her.

“Come here to sulk?” she continued.

“Only if you are,” he replied, earning a small laugh out of her.

“No, I was actually sending a letter to my mother…” she muttered the last bit, knowing the topic of mothers were rather touchy for the both of them.

Talbott imagined it was a rather large possibility that he was the only person who knew that her mother was almost totally despondent, ever since the infamous Jacob Johnson disappeared. There was also the mysterious fate of her father she grappled with. Though, what that fate was, Alexus still had not revealed to him. Her mother was a topic that Alexus had not divulged to him so easily, only in a moment of softness, when he revealed the tragedy of his parents. It was solid grief they felt for each other that night. Missing their family was another thing they had in common.

He gave her a slight nod of acknowledgement, the silence between them that of a knowing air that no more words of the topic needed to be discussed.

“So, any new information on the Vaults?” he asked, changing to a topic that he knew she had no qualms talking about.

She shifted on her feet, thinking about her answer. “No. Not really. Cold leads, for a majority, but there is something promising that Jae Kim is looking into for me.”

“Yeah? What sort of things?” he asked.

“Oh, it’s… it’s probably for the best if you don’t know. The less you know, the safer.”

He scoffed at her words, but he didn’t press more. He had heard a rumor or seven about Alexus and Jae Kim’s exploits to spots with dark wizards. “Do you have anything you’re doing in the meantime?” he asked.

“Just regular student activities. Gotta do something to make the professors think I’m normal. Friends as well. Valentine’s is in a couple days and it seems some of the Circle is rather concerned. I should do things to take my mind off the Vaults, you know, and romance seems to be their answer.” She spoke with a hint of disdain at the prospect of her entire scenario, and Talbott wished he could sympathize, but no one was particularly interested in his own dating habits enough to berate him. But he would still imagine it was annoying.

“I’m sorry,” he said, grimacing at the prospects of forced social interaction.

“It’s all fine, but the worst of it is that they seemed determined to find a date for me rather than ask me whom I would like to be with.”

His heart faltered for just a second before fluttering. He swallowed before he spoke again, hoping nothing about him was betraying his internal eagerness. “Any likely candidates?” he asked, voice even.

“Actually, yes. For them, they seem to think Barnaby Lee would be a good distraction.”

Talbott heard glass shattering in the distance, but he knew it was just in his head. “Oh?” he pressed.

“Yes. I admit, he would be good at lifting my spirits, but… he’s more a brother to me than anything else. Well, he has been something of a brother to me, since Jacob… you know. Barnaby is sweet, he’s kind and funny, but… I just don’t feel anything romantic for him. He’s a bit too energetic for me. I like someone more…” she trailed off for a second before focusing on Talbott. “Someone more… calm,” she spoke, resolved.

Talbott swallowed again, his throat drying up rapidly right now. “Seems like you have an unlucky lad in mind already,” he remarked.

She smirked and folded her arms over her chest. “Actually, I do.”

He was hoping his blush was not so visually obvious as he felt it was, his face was burning. “Anyone I know?” he asked.

She stared up at him for a second, her emerald green eyes meeting his piercing scarlet ones.

“You are… so daft!” she shouted. He jolted back, her voice resounded across the snowy sky, muffled by the weather, but still loud enough to shake the nearby owls, the fluttering of many wings resounding through the air like a shaky echo of her exclamation.

“I’m describing you! I’m thinking about you! It’s always been you! Merlin knows why, you’re thicker than a brick wall!” She threw her arms up in frustration as he slowly processed what she was saying.

Then, a slow, mischievous smile crossed his face. It was a relief that she felt the same way, but it was also a sense of victory that he had over her. She admitted her feelings first.

“You fancy me?” he started as Alexus realized the ammunition that she had handed over to him.

He almost laughed. “You call me thick, but you’re the one who just confessed from pure frustration!”

She pulled out her wand and made a quick job of knocking him down onto his bum. He just laughed, out loud.

“You’re the worst! You’re insufferable!” she yelled again before walking past him, disappearing down the stairs of the owlery.

He watched her leave, the smile never leaving his face. He will talk to her later today, apologize, maybe confess his returned affections, but for now, he felt like flying. Someone liked him. Someone whom he himself liked very much.

~    ~    ~

Night came, and so did curfew. Talbott waited in the corner of the Ravenclaw common room anxiously, waiting for Alexus to return. He had not seen her since their encounter earlier that day, but she was bound to return. Though, he did consider the idea that she might not. Her disregard for the rules and intellectual prowles had led to her spending the night in the library in secret, doing research on a miscellaneous number of things all throughout their six years at Hogwarts. He hoped that this was not a night where she needed to be gone.

Talbott almost had an overwhelming instinct to apologize for laughing, but they both knew it was the nature of their relationship. Chiding wits and quips, mixed with heavy sarcasm. It has been that way since they’ve known each other. He took another deep breath as he waited. He looked up every time someone came in, but none of them were Alexus.

Slowly, the number of students filing into the Common Room started to dwindle until no one was coming in anymore.

Talbott was feeling uneasy when Badeea Ali and Tulip Karasu came from their dorm room, the same dorm Alexus would be in. He stood up and silently made his way over to them. He almost felt apprehensive when they stopped talking as he approached, but he persisted nonetheless.

“Is Alexus in her dorm?” he asked tentatively, “I have something I need to tell her.”

“I haven’t seen her since dinner,” Badeea replied, almost in a contemplating way, some subtle emotion in her voice, and Talbott did not miss the small gleam in Tulip’s mischievous dark eyes. He remembered Alexus storming off, so it was not an illogical step that she told her friends a filtered version of what had transpired between them. Then he remembered the whole complaint about her friends in the Circle trying to set her up with someone for a date, Tulip would definitely be one to tease Alexus about her romantic quests, especially with Talbott.

“Oh, sorry, I’ll just… head up, then,” he started to excuse himself, making his way to his own dorm, but they stopped him.

“At dinner, Jae Kim came to the table, told her that his “contact” or something was ready to meet her,” Tulip recounted.

“Uh… did he happen to mention where this meeting was taking place?” he asked, but the fact that it was Jae, the fact that she told him it was safer if he didn’t know, it wasn’t hard to draw a conclusion as he had done earlier.

Alexus was a smart girl, one of the brightest students in their whole year. But she could be the thickest person in all of Hogwarts when the Cursed Vaults were in her mind.

“It’s hard to say, she’s rather secretive when it comes to her exploits with Jae. But for specific locations, she did not say a word. She just took off,” Badeea explained.

Talbott pursed his lips and gave them a nod, collecting himself without another word before he went upstairs to his own dorm. No one was in there, which was what he needed before he opened the window. He took off into the night sky as he assumed his animagus form, an eagle. He had a strong idea where Alexus currently was, and that gave him an educated guess as to where she was going to end up before the night was through.

He flew through the castle, elegantly, weaving between the highest walls with practiced ease, navigating the way to the Hospital Wing, or, at least, the outside of it. If Alexus had gone exactly where he thought she had, he imagined that the smartest girl in their year would have said something just as smart, more than likely to the wrong wizard. Or, maybe she was pursuing one of the dark wizards of ‘R’. It wasn’t so long after she was attacked by the black lake, she could very well be attacked again. The more he thought about it, the more it made sense to Talbott that she was going to be turning up in the Hospital Wing.

He circled a small thicket of trees outside the wing before he landed on a branch, perching close enough to the windows to where he could see a majority of the interior.

He waited now, every person moving had his head turning, every sign, any sign, he watched.

For an hour, there was no sign of Alexus, however, and no sign of anyone really, and the moon was slowly crawling higher into the sky. Talbott entertained the possibility that maybe Alexus would seek alternative help for healing, if she needed it, maybe to avoid the suspicion of the teachers. If that was the case, he would bring himself to inquiring Chiara Lobosca at breakfast.

For an hour, he waited,  not quite ready to go back to the dorm yet, when the doors of the Hospital Wing were thrown open, and three people came in, one of them unconscious, carried on the back of another while the third urgently enlisted Madam Pomfrey.

Talbott immediately recognized Alexus being carried by Ben Cooper, Jae Kim running to Pomfrey. He watched as she was carefully lowered onto a bed. From what he could see, she was not bleeding, but the finer details were a bit harder to make out, and no blood wasn’t a definitively better sign.

Ben and Jae stepped back, and after some small exchange with Pomphrey, they left.

Talbott watched for another second of Pomfrey caring for Alexus before he resolved himself and flew away. He was worried, yes, but he knew Alexus. She was strong, and was bound to be okay. She had to be okay, it wouldn’t have made sense otherwise. He would be there for her, when she wasn’t okay, he would see to it himself that she was okay.

~    ~    ~

Alexus’s eyes shot open and she gasped, moving to sit up and whip out her wand to send a quick spell to the nearest danger, but was pushed back down when an explosion of pain raked through her body.

“Easy, easy,” she heard a soft voice next to her say as she was slowly pushed back down.

She took a calmer breath and looked around. Hospital Wing, not Knockturn Alley. Daytime, the morning judging by the position of the shadows being casted by the natural sunlight fluttering in from the windows. No dark wizards inflicting curses on her.

She blinked a bit, focusing her vision before slowly turning to the person at her bedside.

“Talbott,” she whispered, her throat sore, unable to speak much louder at the moment. But it was unmistakable, the sharp-featured Ravenclaw boy whom she fancied, his red eyes filled with concern and worry.

“Yes, unless you were expecting someone else,” he muttered as he reached over to the nightstand. He did not miss the strain in her voice, and grabbed a small glass of water perched there. She took it carefully, hands shaking, but grip not so weak. She took the water in small sips, drinking enough before handing the half-empty glass back to him.

“Better?” he asked.

She nodded and let herself relax into the bed. It was hard to relax, being tortured for an indistinguishable amount of time by the Cruciatus Curse in a dark alley could have that effect on a witch.

“You were actually  one of the last people I expected, after you laughed at me,” she muttered.

Talbott smiled softly, despite himself. “It was a laugh of relief, Alexus.”

She had half a mind to tell him to leave. “What would you possibly be relieved about?”

He leaned back into his seat, and she looked up at him. “You mean it’s not obvious?” he asked, “It’s a mutual feeling. I… fancy you too.”

She sat up abruptly again before pain pushed her back down. “I ought to hex you!” she whispered harshly, unable to raise her voice into a proper yell.

“You’re in no right shape to do so,” he chided.

“Careful, Winger, I won’t be in this bed forever.”

His face blanched at the smug look that crossed her face, but he steeled himself. “You’re uncharacteristically temperamental right now, emphasis on mental.”

“You get tortured, see if that doesn’t make you a little mental.”

He sighed and watched her face. She looked cross, brows furrowed, lips tugged down, but in her eyes, it was different. He’d seen that look before, the look of frayed terror and exhaustion. The ordeal weighed on her more than she was willing to admit, and he understood. The pride, the expectations, the appearance. She’d been through too much before she stepped foot on Hogwarts, they both had. But her life had not gotten easier, not with the betrayal, the death, the attacks. She found Jacob, but at what cost? She had lost him, and she was looking for him again.

Talbott knew that Alexus’s pursuit of the Vaults was no longer just the pursuit of knowledge that no one had obtained before. In her heart, in her pursuit was all just for the chance to see her brother, one more time. Talbott would give anything to see his mother just once, if only for a second.

He slowly slid his hand over hers, gently linking his fingers with hers, a gesture that she reciprocated.

“You know… it’s… it’s not the torture that was the hardest part. It’s not the hardest part of this journey, of this path that I’m walking. N-not by a long shot,” she whispered, faltering at her words, lacking the strength to speak, but not for the reasons that were obvious.

He just tilted his head in a silent inquiry for her to say whatever she needed to say. He would listen.

She took a shuddering breath. “It’s… it’s hard finding people, finding friends who will still want to walk with me, once they realize how serious my path is.” She let go of his hand, slowly moving it away. She turned away from him, not able to meet his eyes anymore.

He kept watching her. She spoke vaguely, she spoke seriously, and he read between the lines, maybe the rehearsed speech she prepared for him, prepared for anyone who dared to get close. She was asking him if he would be someone who still wanted to walk with her. Not just in a path of friendship, but if he liked her, she was terrified of him getting hurt. Worrying about him, making him relieve the one thing he wanted to and had been trying to avoid for a majority of his life because of the choices she made.

This was something he thought about, often. More often than he cared to admit, wondering what his feelings met in the long term, knowing full well that Alexus may walk out the door and never come back. She could very well die in front of him, and he knew that.

“Everything… is with risk in life, Alexus. I know that. It’s just a matter of knowing which risks to take, the one’s you’d be willing to take. I know which ones I want to take unwaveringly so.”

“That doesn’t mean that I should risk the lives of others in my own pursuit of knowledge.”

“No, you shouldn’t, you shouldn’t even be risking your life for that matter, but here we are. That said, I know why, Alexus. I know why you’re doing this. And I hope you realize that I’m not the only one who thinks you’re worth the risk.”

Alexus looked back at him, mouth agape, eyes wide, trying to speak, but nothing came out. Eventually, she closed her mouth and looked down, hiding her face. “I can’t abandon the path I’m on,” she whispered. He noted her fists clenching the bedsheets, the slight shaking of her shoulders.

She was crying.

She was crying, and she didn’t want him to see.

Soft sniffling came from her before she looked up at him, eyes glistening. “I’ve come too far. I can’t give up on him…”

Ordinarily, he’d be looking for any excuse to leave immediately the second anyone gave any indication they were about to have a heart to heart, but Talbott felt an even greater pull to Alexus, a compelling force to comfort her, to make the tears disappear.

“I know you can’t. If I was in your shoes, I know I wouldn’t be able to either. So the best thing I can do is stay by your side. Walk your path with you, because you are someone I can’t walk away from. Not anymore.”

Her expression relaxed before she furiously wiped the tears away with her thumb. “You’d do that?” she whispered.

“I would.”

“Thank you.”

He looked at her, his eyes piercing at her with a certain sharpness, almost calculating. Then, they weren’t calculating. Every so subtly, his expression softened, a quiet admiration, still easily mistaken for something steeled. He did have a reputation, afterall.

She smiled, finally. He felt some pride, having contributed to that.

“So,” she started, her smile turning into something a little more mischievous, reminding him of Tulip’s persistent presence at breakfast that morning, and he had a sneaking suspicion she had correctly guessed his emotions for her.

“So…?” he repeated, quirking an eyebrow.

“So, would you be willing to walk the path with me… on Valentine’s Day?”

His face heated up immediately, and he pressed a hand to his mouth, trying to hide the blushing. “I’d love to,” his muttered utterance stifled by his hand.

She grinned more. “Don’t worry, Winger, it’ll be somewhere quiet. Hopefully, the Hospital Wing is quiet enough for you.”

“Oi, I didn’t think you’d stay here for that long!”

“No, I plan to be out by tonight, but… well, nothing is certain in the future.”

“Well, I’ll have you know, the Hospital Wing is plenty quiet, but don’t you go and take that as an invitation to go and get trampled by a hippogriff or whatever you do in your spare time.”

“You’re stupid,” she said, almost laughing. “But I take risks, as we said.”

“You’re the stupid one,” he shot back. “Take risks, but just be fine. For three days, be fine. Okay? You need the rest.”

She gave a small nod. “Okay.”

He gave a small sigh before leaning down and pressing a kiss to her cheek, only for a second, but a good and soft second.

He pulled away, and they were both satisfied to find that the other was visibly flushing red.

It was pride that made them blush. A sense of things such as reputation and unfamiliarity to vulnerability and fear that created that pride.

It was a display of affection that was tremendous to him. Unfamiliarity in the sense that it had been years since he had done like that. Talbott had not kissed anyone on the cheek since he was kissing his mother goodbye. That memory brought fear, and he couldn’t show anyone he was afraid. That was his pride. He could be afraid in front of her. He could display tremendous actions to her.

It was warmth in her chest and the secure feeling the action signified to her that was unfamiliar to her. Alexus had not been kissed on the cheek since her mother was coherent. The memory, to her, was a bittersweet rage that was more bitter than sweet. No one had cared for her, no one to care about her, to give her comforting gestures, to make her feel safe. She had to let the world know she was unflappable, perfectly in control unlike the speculation of her maddened brother. That was her pride. She could be vulnerable to him. She could let him get close enough to give her a sense of security that she had feared would never envelope her again.

He slowly slid his hand over hers again before he reached into the bag at his feet. “Would you be bothered if I read to you?” he asked as he pulled out a blue-leather bound book. He held up the cover so she could read it. A collection of poems from a particular author. She was familiar with the book, actually on the waiting list in the library to check it out, poetry being something she was very fond of.

She looked at him, and he flushed again. “I-I have imagined reading allowed to someone I cared about. Something about sharing the feeling of a good poem always attracted me.”

She smiled. “I would love that.”

He returned her smile, and, with one hand, flipped to a page he had marked previously. “There’s a few I thought you would enjoy,” he muttered before clearing his throat.

“The sun was hot You were cool My mother's flowers were beautiful My mother's flowers were safe Your flowers were new Your garden a gift Your love is mine My love is yours

You're a winter husband I'm the summer's daughter My mother's flowers were safe My mother's flowers were a cage Your flowers were a life Your garden a haven My love is yours Your love is mine

You were strong I was helpless My mother's flowers bloom for me My mother's flowers are a gift Your flowers are ours Your garden is ours Our love is ours Our love is life”

He looked at her when he finished. Alexus had a soft smile on her face. “That’s Persephone’s Husband, isn’t it?”

He nodded.

“That’s one of my favorites. Any poems about Hades and Persephone have a place in my heart.”

He almost snickered. “I never took you for being romantically inclined, you’re so logical.”

“Just shut up and read, Winger.”

[rookisaknight]

Raf Tanager, meet Hope County

⤘⤘⤘There’s a new Deputy in Town⬽⬽⬽

So as a side benefit of getting into this fandom again with a brand new gender and a brand new vibe: a brand new deputy. Excited to introduce you all to my boy, they were developed for a joint Deputy au with @ophiebot​ (who will do this for their Deputy Elijah Rook if so inclined). Not exactly reinventing any wheels here, but this time its about the indulgence.

FYI, Molly is still extant, but her story I think has been explored in my brainspace as much as it needs to be. 

➷The Basics

1. Give their full name, and describe them or post a picture! (Height, build, hair, eye, and skin color, etc.)

Rafael "Raf" Tanager (birth name REDACTED). 5'4", prone to chub but hardening up with the frequent exercise, solid build. Freckles on cheeks that darken as time goes on. Short hair kept red by some truly obsessive hairdye upkeep, which is harder than you might think. Hazel eyes. Burns and shrapnel scars around the eyes and mouth.

2. How old are they?

24

3. Sexuality and gender?

Bisexual, transmasc genderqueer. She/they/he but a preference for they/he when he doesnt trust the person using them.

➵Pre-Game

1. How did they end up at the Hope County Sheriff’s Department? How long have they worked there?

Raf grew up closer to Missoula, but he’s still a Montana native. They’ve been at this for around 8 months, pretty much right out of graduating college. Even they honestly aren’t sure how they ended up here, just the latest in a series of adrift jobs after graduating, taken primarily to avoid any potential financial dependence on their  family. Probably would have resigned soon were it not for. Everything.

2. Relationship with Pratt, Hudson, and Whitehorse?

Pratt: Used to hate his guts. The teasing felt too much like flirting for their comfort and he was honestly kind of a bully. Now its trickier. He's pathetic in a way that’s hard for them to be around, as awful as that is, because it hits too close to home.

Hudson: Had a massive crush on her for most of their early days that pretty much went out the window post Eden’s Gate. They still try a little too hard to impress her though.

Whitehorse: Intellectually, they resent his passivity since it means a lot of Eden’s Gate ended up falling in their lap and he’s STILL insistent that maybe they should have left it alone when they’ve all had months to realize why that was a bad idea in the first place. Emotionally, well, they’re maybe a little in need of a father figure or two.

Elijah Rook: The former Rookie. They were quietly a little intimidated by him prior to all this and that’s never fully gone away, but they’ve now been able to witness more of his dorky side that makes it a little harder to take him seriously. You try chaperoning this guy from one end of Hope County and considering him at all frightening.

3. Do they have an education?

They have a MASTERS and its never relevant to anything because its a humanities degree, specifically the classics. Part of the reason they’re a little adrift currently, there was no easy dismount out of college. Just a hell of a lot of debt.

4. Where are they from? Did they speak a different language there?

Missoula, or close enough to it. They picked up some Latin and Greek from their degree. The Latin comes in handy more often than you’d think, what with the cult stuff, but the reading material is a real bummer.

5. Is there anyone outside the valley that might have come looking for them?

They’ve never had many friends in college and high school that could outlast physical proximity and they basically ghosted their family since that was easier than coming out to them at a certain point. So no, no one they want to find them is looking.

6. Did they have a religious background of any kind?

His father is a preacher, and while there’s some baggage there they would still describe themselves as broadly religious. Or at the very least superstitious.

➷Inside Hope County

1. What was going through their head when the helicopter went down and during the subsequent chase?

The crash was honestly the easiest part. That was just panic. The chase was the hard part. The helicopter exploding ended up catching them in the face, leaving them with burns and scarring that would remain for the rest of their life. She's lucky she wasn’t blinded. Still, he was forced to stumble out of the woods in intense pain and bleeding out. Had it not been for Elijah they definitely would have been taken then and there.

2. Were they afraid of Joseph and Eden’s Gate? Angry?

Terrified. Not just because of what they’ve done but because Raf knows intuitively that he's susceptible to it. As early as their first encounter they have a hard time breaking the hold Joseph gets on their mind. Even though they’re conscious of HOW they’re being manipulated, its hard to resist it.

3. Did they trust Dutch?

At that point Raf would’ve happily taken literally anyone who seemed to know what they’re doing and wasn’t holding a gun to his head.

4. How did they feel about their team being taken by the cult, did they count them as lost, did they want them back, did they not care?

Absolutely the nightmare scenario: people’s lives depending on them and their ability to be decisive. Had it not been for Elijah they probably would’ve high tailed it out of there and tried to find someone higher up the authority chain to deal with this mess. Still, just abandoning them all didn’t sit right with him either, and by the time they’d liberated Fall’s End even he had to admit he was there by his own choice.

5. How did they take to the idea of being part of, if not leading, the resistance?

Again, Raf doesn’t really do well with people depending on them. Alone. they probably would have found it a lot more miserable, but Elijah significantly helped lighten that load for them in terms of having a direction. They’ve found out they’re accidentally pretty good at working with a variety of people and can even be inspiring without meaning to. Still, in their ideal world they would’ve been left alone, or at least remained a foot soldier.

6. Which companions did they recruit, and who did they travel with the most?

All guns for hire were recruited, but Sharky and Nick were their go-to’s, Sharky for personal reasons and Nick for air support. Grace was usually the adult supervision when Nick couldn’t make it but. To be frank Raf's aim isn’t great and it drives Grace a little nuts on prolonged missions. She’s tried teaching them but it never really seems to stick.

7. Did they have time to find romance amidst the chaos? How did they do it?

Sharky. That relationship was a bit of a cold opener  (and don’t bother, Sharky already beat you to that joke). After getting their face fucked up during the escape they’ve had a pretty healthy aversion to fire and explosives, making his recruitment a little harrowing. Still, Sharky's sweet in his way, makes them laugh and breathe a little easier when the pressure gets to them, and operates on a pretty similar brainwave. They’ve been joined at the hip since their first few months in Holland Valley. They’re both a little on the codependent side, but really, who are they to complain.

8. Feelings about Joseph?

Joseph taps into a lot of vulnerabilities inside of Raf intuitively. The absence of a strong support system, the loneliness, the fear, the directionlessness, the relationship with their own spirituality, it all provides him a unique entryway into their psyche that he is exactly the kind of person to exploit. As a result, he tends to fixate on them over Elijah, usually to their detriment. Still, that connection can sometimes go both ways, and there are things about Joseph that Raf understands which even his brothers never fully do.

9. Feelings about the other Seeds?

John: They have a unique capacity for antagonizing him. Probably because as an oldest child themselves they know exactly how to jab at the youngest child insecurities. Still, that relationship didn’t stem any deeper and he focused his energies a little more on Elijah. Still, they have him to thank for the Sloth scars on their arm, thanks for that. They’re starting to run out of unmarked skin.

Faith: Faith, meanwhile, was a little more directly focused on Raf, partly because her region was the first time they had to operate a little more on their own. For personal reasons, Elijah wasn’t particularly able to engage with the Bliss. Meaning if Burke was ever going to get saved Raf had to be the one to go in there, again and again. Faith, like Joseph, can tap a lot of that loneliness that Raf has, as well as some gender and sexuality stuff Joseph can’t touch. Suffice to say Sharky had a pretty good reason for being as overbearing as he was during those months, even though he was eventually able to do the job. As a side note, they haven’t had access to their ADHD meds for MONTHS and it doesn’t help when the cult drug is the first thing to make your head feel clear in a while.

Jacob: Jacob was utterly uninterested in Raf and the feeling was mostly mutual. He doesn’t really get him or what he’s about, just knows that the county would be better off when he was put down. Transition goals, though (don’t tell Staci they said that).

10. How did they handle having to kill animals and other humans? Had they done it before?

Animals yeah, you don’t live in Montana as long as they did without hunting occasionally. People....well. You can get used to it.

11. Which canon ending did they choose in-game, and would you have changed the ending at all?

Resist. I wouldn’t. Raf might.

➷Personal

1. Favorite weapon(s)?

They usually prefer to show up to spots early and lay traps, try to minimize the direct combat involvement. When it can’t be avoided though, their pistol isn’t ever far and neither is a hunting knife.

2. Stealth or firepower?

Stealth, one hundred percent. Sharky and Eli are here to do the firepower.

3. How did they spend their time, when not fighting peggies?

A lot of bad movies with the boyfriend and a LOT of poker, one of their more unknown talents. Resistance isn’t gonna fund itself.

4. Where did they live during the events of the game?

Wherever there was a bed they could fall into. Their little trailer they’d been living in prior to all this got absolutely decimated while they were healing up on Dutch’s island.

5. Any other facts you want to share about your Deputy!

He’s got almost supernatural luck to the point that a couple of their guns for hire have gotten superstitious about bringing him to certain events. Including fishing. The catch just always seems somehow a little better. Also he’s privately obsessed with the 1998 recording of Cats and is terrified of anyone finding out.