#jake said FUCK THAT ACTUALLY

[stupidsexygrizzop]

Murph: I have crafted the perfect encounter to incapacitate the party and combine Glen and Ultriss into one force to kick off the next arc and-

[blueingsfairy]

i will accept and forgive and understand anything neytiri throws at spider because it comes from a place of trauma and considering what humans have done to her people is understandable. jake sully however, is human, i don’t care how blue he is. he referring to spider as a pet will not be forgotten. i will be watching him with a microscope next movie and i’ll choose violence. jake is literally the only character that i expect to treat spider better i don’t care.

[be-the-glenn-to-my-maggie]

What if Paz somehow saved Sylwanin and the other kids from being, you know, killed. Just a little, wacky idea for you.

Ohhh, complicated question. I never imagined Paz was at Pandora at that time, tbh. Grace has been on Pandora for so fucking long, she's been there for 30 years. She's been there longer than Neytiri has been alive. There has never been a time Neytiri's life wasn't touched by the sky-people, which is sad to think about.

But back to Paz- I don't think she would've been around for that. BUT, if she was, well, it just postpones the inevitable, quite frankly. Sylwanin and Tsu'tey would've had their good relationships with Grace, and tensions would have continued for a while longer instead of the banning of avatars from Omaticaya land. I do think there would have been another incident that would've caused this ban, just later. Mining would have continued and Sylwanin is still alive and already disillusioned towards the humans. It just adds a really interested dynamic to Jake and Neytiri's relationship when Jake would enter the picture, Sylwanin would NOT be pleased; she was the biggest advocate for the humans beforehand, like Neytiri, I'm sure she feels somewhat responsible for the destruction.

Another note; I really hesitate at fanon characterization of Paz. It comes from a place of wanting Spider to have a parent he can think highly of, one who loved him and prioritized him and his ideals (and the comics hint this of course). In actuality, we know nothing about her except that she died in the Assault on the Tree of Souls. Aside from Trudy, every RDA soldier we see is extremely racist towards the Na'vi and is nothing but excited to wipe them out. I really caution against white savior-ing and humanizing the colonizers, it's a trait that is really overused in this series in particular. The recoms and Quaritch have no excuse and never will, and frankly, neither does Paz. It is really worrying how many people want to excuse them. I know you were just throwing out a scenario though.

[anotherpapercut]

I soooo wish I still had a copy so I could show you guys the best thing I've ever read in my life but I'll never for as long as I live forget the first sentence "There are many oppressed minorities in America: Blacks, Mexicans, Asians, Emos, Goths, Gays, and most of all, Juggalos."

[khaothanawat]

watching ghost host ghost house episode 7 and currently wishing i knew exactly zero thai so that i could live in ignorant bliss about kevin and jake calling one another “i” and “you” too

[the-acid-pear]

I never tried the option myself bc it'd probably mean skipping the Reason You Suck speech at the end (fire for speedrunners though) but I Love that you can frame your Phoneys in 3, especially so if you've already killed the previous two. Like yeah couldn't send you off to die so i'll let the goverment do it for me 🧸 like its just Peak evil imo.

[olivers-cocoapuffs]

“Jake is actually a really good detective” WDYM “actually 🤓” THATS BASICALLY THE WHOLE FUCKING PLOT

[lohstandfound]

ignore this.

learning to shut up when i dont have anything new to say to the discussions my mutuals are having about the treatment of the female characters in this show and fandom

even though ive just gone ahead and rambled in the tags a bunch of bullshit

[foxcassius]

okay sat down with the actual numbers now that i'm in japan and i have a little more money than i thought i would. i'm going to transfer ¥90000 to korea, send my japanese pension refund directly to my korean account, and i have some money in my american account too for sudden needs on that end. i need to buy a towel (rip) + a pillow/pillow-shaped plush + some kind of face wash to be comfortable in hostels and stuff here, but after that i have enough to actually like do something.

[rubyrubyrubytuesday]

your honor, they're the same picture

[thelittlemermage]

Someone on YouTube did a rendition of the musical Sideshow where Jake is white. I feel insane.

[anotherpapercut]

CORRECT THANK YOU FOR SHARING

[devil-in-hiding]

Okay but Virgin!Reader who is absolutely terrified of intimacy. It’s not a lack of knowledge on the subject; she’s knows more about it than a retired pornstar. But she just can’t handle the thought of giving herself away, especially to someone she doesn’t know or feels like she can’t trust! Back where she comes from, trust is a privilege and respect is a must. But what happens when she meets brutal, gruff, and one hundred and ten percent dangerous Simon Riley, who’s way more experienced and has a history of fucking just to let off some steam.

Ughhhhh 😵‍💫

Simon is your neighbor. Your first interaction is when he almost knocks you over in the hall, only offering a grunt and cold glare before slamming his apartment door shut.

It remains that way for a year or so, the rare times you do see him home. Nothing is ever said, but he acknowledges you with a grunt, and you always return a small nod of greeting. He’s cold and gruff, but every time he gets home from wherever he goes, you have to hole up in the living room to escape the moans and his headboard banging into your wall. the following mornings you can hardly look him in the eye as he stares at you rushing towards the stairs.

It’s not until after a particularly bad date, who is stubbornly trying to invite himself into your apartment, that Simon actually speaks.

“Jake please, I had a nice time but I have to get up early for work.” You protest, trying to block your doorway and the guy scoffs. “C’mon, you gonna leave me hangin like that?” He frowns, trying to shoulder past you.

“I would like you to leave now.”

“Listen here you little bitch, I’ve had to put up with staring at that rack all night, the least you can do is-“

“Think the lady told you to get the fuck out mate.” A deep voice growls, and the two of you jump, and your eyes widen at seeing Simon there, and there’s a dark look in his eyes as he stares down your ‘date’

“Hey man, this is none of you-“

“Considering this nice woman is my neighbor, I’m making it my fucking business.” He states before quite literally lifting Jake by the scruff of his neck and throwing him out into the hallway. “I see you bothering her again and I’ll kick your sorry ass up and down this god damn complex you got that?”

Jake is gone before Simon is done talking. You hear him take a deep breath, shoulders relaxing before he turns to face you, and you’re surprised by the concern showing in his eyes.

“That fuckhead didn’t hurt you, did he?” He asks, and you’re shocked this man’s voice can be so soft. You’re frozen, just staring at him before you find your voice.

“N-no, no I’m okay, he was just trying to shoulder past me.” You stutter out, nervously playing with your fingers. Your heart stops when one of his large hands reaches up, gently brushing your hair away from your face.

“Sorry it took me so long, couldn’t tell if it was you I was hearing.” He admits, and your heart flutters. He knows your voice?

He talks to you more after that, helping you with groceries when your hands are full, stopping by to ask if you’d watch his apartment while he’s away on deployment. You start to look forward to the two knocks on your door, finding Simon waiting for you, crinkles around his eyes letting you know he’s smiling at you.

But the women still come, along with your nights camped out in the living room, you’re heart just a bit heavier every time.

(might turn this into something)

[moaninmoonen]

Tommy Fury vs. KSI: (Punches Landed)

Jack Talks Boxing

[ncttytrack]

Enha reaction to their sweet virgin girlfriend asking them "please dont make it hurt"

This is so hot I’m dying 😭 I’m sorry for making Sunghoon toxic every time lmao

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨ ʚɞ ୧⋆ ˚｡⋆ ⋆ ˚｡⋆୨ ʚɞ ୧⋆ ˚｡⋆

ꕤ Heeseung would think you were funny for saying that. Him? Being careful? Don’t get me wrong, as his girlfriend he loves you very much, but hearing those words fall out from your sweet little mouth would actually make him want to fuck you harder, rougher and definitely faster. “Baby, you know when you sound that cute I can’t hold back”, he says as he roughly fucks into you. It would leave you so confused, he would fuck you so hard, but his words would be so sweet, praising you for being able to take his big cock

ꕤ It would be over for Jay if you said that. Seeing how weak you are under him, so inexperienced, begging him to not make it hurt. I lowkey think Jay has a virgin kink, since he likes to be the “caretaker”, making sure you feel good and that it isn’t too much for you. Would have no problem in taking it slow, his ego actually getting bigger when seeing how much trouble it takes for you to only take the tip of his cock. “My sweet baby, let’s just start with the tip yeah?”

ꕤ Jake wouldn’t know how to react tbh. At one end, he would love to take extra care with you, making sure that his cute virgin girlfriend doesn’t get hurt the first time you have sex. But, I also think he is too clumsy? - accidentally pushing himself way to roughly into you, making you let out a loud cry. He would try so hard to not fuck into you then and there, but he would eventually give up and just be as rough with you as he pleases. “You feel too good for me to take it slow”

ꕤ Sunghoon finds your begging hot, so hot that he would in fact not be careful with you. “Don’t worry bunny, I’m gonna stretch you out real good so it doesn’t hurt” The pain of taking his big cock for the first time, mixed with the pleasure, would be too much for you, making you cry. Sunghoon would probably get more turned on by this though, and the harder you cry the rougher he pounds into you. But, right after, he would be so sweet to you, cuddling you as aftercare, giving you soft kisses at the top of your head. “My sweet bunny, you were so good for me, let hoonie take care of you”

[moondancediner]

Love of my Life

summary: the dagger squad meets hangman's best-kept secret

jake seresin x reader

word count: 1490

warnings: no editing, fluff

a/n: this popped into my head the other night... enjoy! also this gif makes me CHOKE ohmylord

song rec: love of my life - harry styles

masterlist

It wasn’t on purpose. Nights when you and Jake ended up at the same bar were never planned, mostly because your friends from work always wanted to go somewhere downtown, and Jake’s friends from work always wanted to go to the Hard Deck so there was never a chance for the two groups to intersect. 

Tonight, however, your friends had enough of hearing about all your nights at the Hard Deck with your fighter pilot husband who drops by work every once and a while with lunch or a gorgeous bouquet of flowers. They decided to venture out to the Hard Deck tonight for your monthly get-together and you weren’t going to miss an opportunity to ogle at your husband from across the bar while he played darts and pool with his Dagger Squad friends who just so happened to be in town visiting. 

And that’s exactly where you found yourself on this lovely Friday night. Your friend walked over to your standing table with another drink for you and you thanked her with a smile. She immediately started diving into some workplace gossip, keeping her voice quiet since so many of your colleagues had managed to make it out tonight. You half-listened to her go on how bad the break room refrigerator smelled the other day but your real focus was on Jake who was playing pool with Phoenix, Fanboy, and Bob. He had Bob on his team and you were surprised to see him actually give the man a chance to play without correcting or coaching him. 

You knew all about the Dagger Squad, when Jake was first sent out here you followed him, even knowing this wouldn’t be a permanent duty station, and he talked about everyone he was competing against non stop. From the moment he came home after training you were getting a full rundown of the days happening (you were sworn to secrecy of the top secret events, of course). You learned quickly who was who, even if you never got the opportunity to meet them. 

After the mission, you were pulling out boxes and getting ready to move what little belongings you brought over to the island when Jake came home and surprised you to your core. He accepted a teaching position here on the North Island and you were staying for the foreseeable future. 

You were shocked but over the moon. Jake would be in one spot for at least a couple years and wouldn’t be off on deployments and missions so often. You could start a family and he could actually be there for all of it. 

“Hello? Anybody home?” A hand waving in front of your face brought you out of memories and a trance you hadn’t realized you were in. You laughed and smiled at your friend, but not before catching the eye of Phoenix, who totally caught you staring at Jake. 

“Sorry, sorry, got a little lost there.” You waved her hand out of your face and took another sip from your drink. 

“I’ll say,” she laughed, “I mean, I get it.” Her eyebrows wagged and you laughed heartily, throwing your head back. She was always complimenting your choice of husband and you had to agree with her, he was fine as hell. 

“Fuck, I think one of his friends just caught me staring,” you said once the laughter died down. 

“Remind me again why he doesn’t tell them about you?” 

“It started off as a joke,” you start, “he wanted to see how long it would take one of them to notice, and now it’s just an ongoing bet we have.” 

“A bet I am about to win, by the way.” Jake suddenly appears behind you and you’re happy to see him until his words sink in.

“You’re not allowed to interfere!” You point at him and he just laughs. 

“No interference, I promise.” He leans on the table you two are standing at and you almost forget about the bet for a second because his green eyes still captivate you even after all this time. 

“Well, what are you doing over here then?”

“See now, that’s where it gets interesting because someone caught you looking at me,” he tips his beer over in the direction of his friends, who scatter like chickens when you turn your head to look at them, “and they bet me $20 that I couldn’t walk over here and get your phone number.” 

“Hmmm, seems like fair play to me.” Your friend interjects, looking contemplatively between you and your cheating husband. 

A noise comes out of your mouth, somewhere between disbelief and betrayal. You only had one month left before the bet was yours and you could claim your prize and now this happens, the perfect opportunity falls right into Jake’s lap. 

“Did none of them notice the giant ring on my finger?” You hold up your wedding rings, which glint even in the dim bar lighting and Jake takes your fingers in his hand, bending them towards himself before placing a kiss on your knuckles. You swoon. It’s impossible not to. “Don’t try to distract me, you’re in trouble.” 

“Come on darlin’,” His hand fell away from yours but moved slyly around your hip, where it curled around the belt loops of your shorts, and just then, while his face was inching towards yours, your wedding song came on. 

“When did this song get added to the jukebox?” 

“I may have put in a special request.” His smile did you in. You met him halfway and when your lips met that familiar kaleidoscope of butterflies took flight. Jake pulled away just to smile at you some more before pressing a few quick kisses to your lips. When he backed away enough, you took the chance to look over his shoulder and see what his friends thought. 

The entire group was standing around, completely gobsmacked at what just occurred and you could only imagine what was running through their minds. 

“After you, Mrs. Seresin,” Jake whispered in your ear. You gave him the best glare you could but he just laughed and grabbed your hand to walk you over to the group of people you already felt like you knew. 

Jake chuckled as you got within ear shot. “Everyone, I’d like you to meet someone,” he pulled you under his arm and you automatically slid your own across his back, “this is my wife.” He said it with genuine pride, a stark contrast to his usual cocky tone everyone was used to. 

“Wife?” Rooster repeated, dumbfounded.

“Pick your jaw up off the floor, Bradshaw.”

You ignored Jake and introduced yourself to everyone with a quick wave. “It’s nice to finally meet you all.” 

There was a beat of silence while you watched everyone process what was happening, but Phoenix broke it with a laugh. “You’ve been holding out on us, Bagman!” 

“Yeah, what the hell, man!” Rooster seemed downright offended that Jake would keep such a secret from them and you couldn’t help but laugh. 

“It’s not all Jake’s fault,” You come to his defense, “we had a bet going, which I just lost.” 

“What bet did you two have?” Bob asked, coming forward to introduce himself to you properly. 

You shook his outstretched hand, smiling. “We wanted to see how long it would take for someone to figure out he was married.”

“You… you don’t wear a wedding ring?” Rooster seemed to be having the hardest time with this revelation and it was cracking you up. 

Jake pulled his dog tags out from under his shirt, proudly turning them around to display his gold wedding band that perfectly matched the one around your finger. They both belonged to his grandparents and he was so proud to give you his grandmother's band on your wedding day. 

Phoenix studied the two of you for a moment, watched the way you started to sway to a song and Jake immediately joined in, watched how his attention always drifted back to you, and how his entire cocky dimenor melted away as soon as you were near. 

“So, what’s the story? How did you manage to bag Hangman?” Natasha asked, leaning her hands on the pool cue in front of her. 

Jake pretended to be offended. “I’m not that wild.” 

You roll your eyes affectionately before diving into the story of how you and Jake met. It was nothing spectacular or anything you would want to make a movie about, but it was a whirlwind romance that ended in the two of you married in the Seresin family’s backyard three summers ago. 

When you finished your story, all smiles for your husband, Rooster raised his beer in a toast. “Welcome to the family, Mrs. Seresin.” 

Jake couldn’t help but smile. It felt good to let the team in on his best-kept secret, even if he was gonna pay for her losing the bet later on tonight. 

---

thanks for reading ily

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