#jay and zayne coming to you...soon...

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Home is where the hurt is - Cover announcement

Here we go! We're in the final stages, the manuscript is finished, the cover is done and I can finally share it with you all.

I will have a paperback and ebook version of the book available this summer! It will be sold through Amazon all over the world.

Release date to come soon!

[heartyluv]

hey jay!!

i have a fluffier request for any lads guy you want. how would (lads guy of your choice) react to a partner with chronic illness? like pots, eds, cfs, or something like that

you write the lads men so well!!! both for the spicier and fluffier stuff i feel like you capture their characters really well. i love reading your stuff :)

dont feel pressured to if you're busy or that topic makes you uncomfortable though! have a nice day!!!

Note: I did a good amount of research into POTS before I decided to take on writing about it. It was important to me that I understood it to the best of my abilities so that it was written as accurately as possible. Thank you luvly, for trusting me to handle a topic like this. I was originally going to choose Zayne—for obvious reasons—but Sylus just clicked in the end for me. I hope I’ve done this well. ♡

Warning: I don’t exactly know if this needs any or how to list them if it does. But, please proceed to read with caution!

Creds to @/roseraris for the divider!

Sylus/Reader

Your messy apartment was starting to get to you in ways it never has before. From the mountain of dishes to the loads of laundry piling up in your room, you decided that there was no excuse anymore for it to stay like this.

You believe that your boyfriend’s absence is the reason for this, though. Sylus has become your sole motivation when it comes to you doing literally anything, since you two got together. While you know that completing certain tasks is more beneficial for you than it is him, you love how much he praises and loves on you for taking care of things you initially felt were too challenging to accomplish.

And because he’s been gone for almost three weeks now on a trip to handle some business, it’s been getting more and more difficult to do the things you do on a daily basis. You’re not embarrassed to say that he’s become your clutch.

But he’s supposed to return soon, and you refuse to let him feel sorry for you or be disappointed because you let it get to this point. So, you choose your favorite playlist and your best speaker, scrolling through your list of songs so that you can get to work.

It’s as you search that you feel a heat flash and a sudden wave of dizziness. I just need to drink some water and I’ll be fine, you tell yourself. You refuse to be deterred for any reason. You even turn your central air conditioning on so that you don’t overheat when you get into the groove, attempting to tackle all the things that could contribute to forcing you to stop.

You start with the kitchen, getting the dishes nice and soapy before watching all of it be rinsed off by the warm water. It’s the satisfying scene of an empty sink and the fresh smell of your favorite dish soap lingering that makes it all worth it in the end.

You reorganize and clean out the fridge, clean behind it as well as the stove, and you even scrub the cabinets and cupboards. With the kitchen done, even though you had your moments of feeling lightheaded, it wasn’t too bad. You kept yourself hydrated and tried to operate in moderation, despite the motivation coursing through you.

Little did you know, your body was experiencing all these symptoms at a higher intensity because you were beginning to experience your first flare up.

You had only recently been diagnosed with POTS, so you were still navigating how to accurately pinpoint symptoms and their correlations. Since it’s a syndrome and there are so many side effects that differentiate for every individual, it got difficult at times to figure out what was a flare up or something unrelated.

When you told Sylus about it, he became attentive in a way you’ve never experienced before. He was at every appointment, constantly researching vitamins and supplements to make sure you get the proper daily intake, and he’s even gone as far as communicating with your doctor directly to have all the knowledge he needs to efficiently help you in any way that he can.

When you learned that you could have flare ups, you thought that if you just followed a certain regimen and didn’t do certain things, that you’d be fine. The thought of it honestly slipped your mind since you’ve never had one yet.

But typically, flare ups require a trigger and even with preventative measures, your body will always react to something, no matter how hard you tried to ensure it wouldn’t.

And right now, as you constantly bend down to throw dirty clothes into the washer, along with the mix of the exertion you put yourself through with your other tasks, your body was overheating in a way that was noticeably slowing you down.

A sudden sharp pain between your shoulder blades sparked, making you wince. That dizziness now turned into nausea and it felt impossible to stand. But you didn’t want to stop, because if you stopped, you didn’t know when or how soon you’d come back to this. You couldn’t deal with that failure.

Almost like he could feel your pain and struggles, your phone rang, interrupting the blaring pop song. You fished it out of your pocket to see the picture of you and Sylus taking over your screen. Disconnecting your phone from the bluetooth device, you put it on speaker and set it down as you forced the rest of your clothes into the machine.

“Are you alright?” his deep voice rumbles.

Your eyebrows furrowed before you called out to answer. He asked like he knows for a fact that you aren’t, but you don’t want to worry him. “I’m fine, babe. Are you? How’s your trip so far? I was planning on calling you later, actually.”

“I was until I received a notification about your sudden increase in heart rate and blood pressure levels. And you sound fatigued.”

“Notification?” You stop what you’re doing, feeling a sudden shortness of breath as your eyes narrowed with foggy vision.

“The ring I gave you a week after your diagnosis,” he clarifies. “I had technology installed in it so that I would be able to monitor your vitals no matter where I am, so even when you aren’t paying attention, I always will be.”

So he wasn’t just magically able to tell something was wrong. He could see it. “How did you put—”

“None of that matters,” he interrupts. “I don’t like when you lie to me, especially about something like this. And I need you to stop whatever you’re doing. I’ve instructed Luke and Kieran to come by until I arrive later on today to keep an eye on you and to assist you with anything else you need.”

“You’re coming home?” you say excitedly. But you have to retract that joy just a little bit when you feel a rapid thumping in your chest. In and out, slow breaths, you say in your mind.

“I’m on my flight now, and when I get to you, I’m taking you to see my personal doctor that I have on call at all times until your primary physician’s office opens tomorrow since they’re closed today.”

“Sy, I don’t want the twins to see my apartment right now,” you say softly, unable to think straight as a small headache begins to bloom in your temples. “Besides, I just need to sit down. I don’t need any doctor. I’m fine—“

“You’re not fine. You’re experiencing a flare up and I can assume that between your body overheating from whatever it is that you’ve done and with the things I’m seeing right now on my screen, if you do not listen to me, you will fall unconscious.”

“It’s that serious?” you bite your nail with uncertainty and guilt. He was doing more to keep you safe than you were. It felt embarrassing.

“It is. Please listen to me, sweetie.” Sylus never says please, so you know that to not only protect yourself, to give him peace of mind, you have to sit your ass down. “They will be there in thirty minutes and don’t be concerned with the state of your apartment. There is no judgment and you are far more important than any mess. Drop everything you’re doing, drink water—little sips so that you don’t overwhelm your body—and lay down until they get there.”

You nod, even if he can’t see it. “I’ll sit down. I’m sorry for worrying you.”

“Don’t be sorry. Just listen to what I’m telling you, kitten. Stay on the phone with me until they get there.”

He effectively distracts you, telling you about things he wants to do with you when you’re feeling better. You still feel lightheaded and that pain is still in your upper back and head, but it’s significantly decreased.

“They’ve arrived. Can you stand to open the door?”

“I can,” you assure. “I love you, baby. Thank you for helping me.”

“It’s what I do best. Now, let me in.”

You freeze in your process of standing. “Let you in?”

His silence makes you throw the phone down, and you wish you could run to the door, but your body is so tired that you couldn’t. You opt for a brisk walk, and when you see your beautiful man smiling softly at you with the twins by his side and the person you assume to be his personal doctor after you swung the door open, you feel an overwhelming amount of love.

“You lied to me!” you exclaimed, wrapping your arms around his neck as his went around your waist. He chuckles, dollar signs swimming around the sexy tone.

“I had to so that you didn’t get overly excited about my return. Had to keep you stable.” He kisses your neck. “Let’s get you inside so you can be evaluated.”

So much appreciation takes over you as everyone comes inside, the twins frantically looking over you with concern before Sylus tells them to finish what you started. The doctor converses with you for a little bit, the older man’s demeanor gentle and caring as he goes to check your blood pressure while Sylus briefly explains important details.

You couldn’t have asked for a more perfect and attentive family. They’re the only people in this world that you would choose in this life and any after, over and over again.

[wwestrang-fan]

Something different teaser

jey uso x oc reader

Summary :After Jey's divorce, he found himself overwhelmed by the support of family and friends who were determined to help him move on. They became a relentless support squad, arranging blind dates and social outings, believing that a little push would lift his spirits. However, Jey craved solitude to process his emotions. One night, despite his reluctance, his friends insisted he join them at a new restaurant, where he unexpectedly encountered someone who wasn't his usual type completely different from the partners he typically sought.

warning : a little bit of angst insecurity bit of a age gap scars

author's note : this is my first time writing so let me know what you guys think

Jey was waiting for his friend sami zayn by the exit of the arena ready to go back to the hotel

Hey Jay, you good to go?" Sami asked while walking over to me. "I've been ready," jey replied while headed to the parking lot. "Yo, me and the guys are heading out tonight. You in?" Sami asked while hopping in the driver's seat. "Nah, I'm just gonna chill at the hotel and call it a night," I replied as I got in the car. "Come on, man. You've barely hung out with us since the divorce. All you do is work! You should come out more," he said. "I just wanna be alone right now, man," jey told sami. He sighed and started to drive.

Jay and Sami arrived at the hotel, Jay headed to the front desk to grab my room key. "Here’s your room key, sir," the receptionist said, handing it over. "Thanks," Jay replied, making his way to the elevator. "You really don’t want to come out with us?" Sami asked. "Yeah, I’m sure," Jay told him. "Come on, man, your brothers want to see you. They're worried," Sami insisted. Jay sighed and stepped out of the elevator, walking toward our room. "I told you, I just want to be alone," Jay said. With another sigh, they continued down the hallway to our room.

As soon as Jey walked into the room, he lay down on the bed, sinking into the comfortable mattress as the exhaustion of the day washed over him. Just then, a knock echoed on the door, prompting Sami to walk over and open it. Standing there was Jimmy.

"What's up, uso?" Jimmy said, walking in with an easy smile.

What up man you good Sami asked

"I'm good. Y'all coming out tonight?" Jimmy asked, his enthusiasm palpable

"Yeah, I'm coming," Sami replied, a grin spreading across his face. "You coming, Jey

"Come on, uso," Jimmy urged, his tone persuasive

"Yeah, come on! Don't make us beg," Sami added playfully.

Jay let out a sigh, finally giving in. “Alright, alright, I’ll come.”

“Great!” Sami replied, grinning. “Everyone’s down in the lobby waiting for us.”

“Okay, let me change real quick; I’ll be there in a minute,” Jey called after them.

“Okay!” Sami and Jimmy echoed in unison, their voices trailing off as they walked out of the room, their footsteps echoing down the hallway

Jey walked out of the elevator and into the bustling lobby. He spotted Sami, Jimmy, Naomi, Cody, Seth, Roman, and Solo all gathered together, animatedly chatting and laughing.

“There he is!” Cody called out, his wide grin.

“How you been, man?” Seth asked.“Hey, man,” Jey replied, stepping forward to give Cody a fist bump.

“I’m good, thanks,” Jey replied

“Glad you guys decided to come with us.”Naomi teased

Jey rolled his eyes playfully and responded, “Yeah, yeah, I know." Where are we going.

“We’re going to Korean BBQ! Damian and Rhea found this amazing place,” it’s supposed to be the best in town. Roman said.

Jey felt his stomach rumble at the thought of sizzling meat and savory flavors. “Sounds great! Let’s go, then!”

With a renewed sense of anticipation, the group made their way towards the exit, laughter and chatter filling the air as they headed out for an evening of good food and great company.

Everyone arrived at the restaurant and spotted Damian and Rhea in a booth. They walked over to join them.

“Hey, glad you guys made it!” Damian said, scooting down to make room.

“Yeah, especially you, Jey,” Rhea added teasing him. “Me and Jimmy almost had to beg him to come,” Sami said, causing everyone to chuckle.

Jey playfully rolled his eyes. “I’m here, aren’t I?” he said. Just then the Waiter came up to the table

“Hello! I’ll be your server today. Do you guys want to start off with drinks?” the waiter asked.

“Yeah, um, I’ll have sweet tea,” Damian said.

“I’ll have sweet tea too, but with a lemon,” Solo added.

“I’ll take a Sprite,” Rhea said.

“I’ll have lemonade,” Jimmy chimed in.

“Me too,” Jey agreed.

“I’ll just have water,” Sami said.

“I’ll have the same,” Naomi replied.

“I’ll also take a Coca-Cola,” Seth said.

“I'll have one as well,” Roman added.

“Okay, I’ll be back with your drinks,” the waiter said, tucking his pad into his pocket and walie away.

Sami looked at the menu and asked, “What’s everyone in the mood for?” Damian chimed in, “How about we go for chicken, beef, some rice, and ramen?” Naomi nodded, “That sounds great!” Everyone agreed. Just then, the waiter brought over their drinks and asked, “Here are your drinks. Are you guys ready to order?” Damian replied, “Yep, we’ll take chicken, beef, rice, ramen, and veggies.” The waiter nodded writing down on the pad and headed back.

While everyone was chatting to kill time, Jey zoned out and started looking around the restaurant. His gaze landed on someone who really caught his eye— a stunning person with snow-white skin and Native American roots. They seemed a bit mixed, and Jey couldn't figure out if they were a guy or a girl, but one thing was for sure they were absolutely gorgeous.

"Hey, Jey, you okay?" Sami asked, noticing his distant expression.

[allwaswell16]

This is a fic rec of One Direction fan fics with a posh and/or spoiled Louis character as requested in this ask. If you enjoy the fic, please leave kudos and comments for the writer! You can find my other fic recs here. Happy reading!

-Larry-

✨ Darling, so it goes by @disgruntledkittenface

(E, 195k, Grace Kelly au, Prince Louis, famous/famous au, long distance relationship, royal, wedding, falling in love, light angst, smut)

Harry Styles is a world-famous actor at the height of his career but a personal low point when he meets His Serene Highness Prince Louis of Monaco by chance. 

✨ Baby Heaven's in your Eyes by @theboyfriendstagram

(E, 120k, sixth form, rich Louis, private school, alcohol, drugs, bad boy Harry, punk Harry, innocent Louis, smut)

a sixth form!AU where Harry is the fucked up bad boy with too many problems, Louis is the perfect rich boy with too much money and their schools are right across from each other.

✨ Born on Third Base by kiddle / @bluejeanlouis

(NR, 115k, high school, boarding school, rich Louis, smart Harry, roommates, coming of age, partying, road trip, pining, friends to lovers, slown burn, angst, sexual content)

So, deciding that the opportunity best not go to waste, Harry shows up for his first and last year at Rockcrest Academy for Boys. There, he meets his roommate, Louis, who is seemingly popular, rich, rebellious, on the football team, and has a thing for movies from the 80s and 90s. 

✨ electing strange perfections by @scrunchyharry

(E, 84k, rich Louis, gardener Harry, coming of age, first love, homophobia, summer love, coming out, smut)

Back for the summer from university, 19-year-old Louis is faced with a massive problem: their new gardener is quite possibly the most gorgeous man he's ever met. 

✨ You Drive Me Round The Bend by TheCellarDoor / @donotdialnine

(M, 77k, rich Louis, spoiled Louis, musician Harry, hate to love, car sex, one night stand, co-workers, car accident, smut)

In which Louis is a spoilt rich kid who’s always on the phone while he drives and Harry is a struggling musician making his way down the mountain. 

✨ i'll crash until you notice me by stylinsoncity / @aliensingucci

(M, 61k, boss/employee relationship, rich Louis, mutual pining, summer love, kink exploration, smut)

Louis sets off to Barbados to oversee the massive resort his family owns known as Sandy Hill. 

✨ Our Stable Heart by Arora

(E, 30k, historical au, 1920s, forbidden love, rich Louis, farm worker Harry, love, romance, smut)

Louis Tomlinson had it all. A beautiful mansion in the country-side of London, a well known job in the heart of downtown, and a lovely fiance he would soon marry...

✨ drain the whole sea by brainwaves

(E, 27k, writer Harry, Harry/OMC, boss/employee relationship, author Louis, rich Louis, dom/sub, dom Louis, sub Harry, angst with a happy ending, fluff, smut)

Despite his boyfriend Sam’s pleading, he lets this dream bring him to the luxurious yet quaint home of world-renowned, best-selling author Louis Tomlinson.

✨ It's the Climb by @lululawrence

(NR, 25k, Hannah Montana au, singer Louis, secret identity, songwriting, horses, farm/ranch, no smut)

The Hannah Montana AU where Louis is a world famous punk rock singer with a stage name of William and Jay drags him back to Tennessee for the summer.

✨ Through Lonely Streets and Neon Lights by sweetly_disposed

(M, 25k, Great Gatsby au, rich Louis, forbidden love, 1920s, historical, homophobia, secret relationship, angst, pining, fluff, parties)

When fate swings his way and he finds himself in Mr Tomlinson's house, he gets much more than he could ever have bargained for.

✨ Bambi by sincehewaseighteen

(E, 18k, thief Harry, rich Louis, fluff, smut)

the au where harry becomes an assassin and has a mission at louis' house to steal the million dollar zirconia for zayn.

✨ The Importance of being Earnest by louloubaby92 / @louloubabys1992

(NR, 16k, coffee shop au, rich Louis, pining, insecure Harry, fluff, angst with a happy ending)

Harry is a barista who's been harboring a crush on Louis for months. Little does he know that Louis actually likes him back.

✨ Giallo! by @larryent

(M, 15k, historical au, Greece, 1990s, summer romance, rich Louis, shy Louis, teacher Harry, artist Louis, fluff)

Upon his return from University, his family abandon the bustling city of London to bask in the comfort of their summer villa. 

✨ lead me out on the moonlit floor by @scrunchyharry

(E, 12k, historical au, Victorian era, rich Louis, masquerade ball, Christmas, aristocrat Louis, Christmas, semi public sex, smut)

Victorian!AU where Louis is a wealthy lord throwing a masquerade ball for his birthday and Harry is a toymaker who's only confident when he's wearing a mask.

✨ I roll and I roll, 'til I change my luck by @scrunchyharry

(E, 8k, rich Louis, brat Louis, fundraiser, first meeting, ice skating, car sex, smut)

Louis is a bored, rich kid whose latest stunt got him arrested and forced to attend a fundraiser at an ice rink, Zayn is his unlucky partner in crime, Harry is the cute hospital volunteer who is having none of his attitude, Niall is the worst DJ in the world, and Liam is Leslie Knope.

✨ Tonight Is on Your Lips by mmaree / @zqua1d

(E, 5k, aristocrat Louis, strangers to lovers, humor, supernatural elements, superstition, soulmates, d/s undertones, fluff, smut)

Louis is the eldest son of the Earl of Doncaster. It wouldn't be so bad if he didn't have to deal with matchmaking parents, three century year-old curses, and waiters with green eyes.

✨ Cowboy by reality_ruins_dreams

(M, 3k, cowboy Harry, spoiled Louis, rich Louis, daddy kink, dirty talk, smut)

Basically Louis has fucked up one to many times and his parents send him to his Aunts ranch in Texas.

-Rare Pairs-

✨ Pretty Little Plaything (series) by Phillipa19

(E, 55k, Zayn/Louis, rich Zayn, eventually rich Louis, sugar baby Louis, spoiled Louis, age difference, dom Zayn, sub Louis, angst, insecurity, charity events, fluff, past abuse, hurt/comfort, smut)

Louis is Zayn's little toy, his precious pet, to play with and keep safe.

✨ Mulligan by tuanpark

(E, 6k, Niall/Louis, golf au, spoiled Louis, rich Louis, caddy Niall, smut)

Louis is a spoiled little rich brat, and his family are members of a country club where Niall just so happens to work. 

[addythelarrie]

9:28

A soulmate AU where 3 little hearts appear on your wrist when you meet your soulmate after turning 18.

Or, the one where Louis is so sure about the fact that Harry is his soulmate, he's been telling it to everyone they've met since he was 3.

Intro // Part 8

If you were to ask either one of the boys to describe the past week in one word, they would without any hesitation sum it up as hell.

For Louis, because the idiot (his words) that he is, convinced himself that some distance between him and Harry is what he needs right now. What both of them needs.

He refrained from following up on whether the younger boy did in fact say yes to that Lewis chap who he severely dislikes even though they've never met, figuring it would be less painful than the reality of knowing that Harry is actually dating someone that's not him.

Dating someone.

What even? Harry is thirteen. He shouldn't even be worrying about something as miniscule as dating at his age.

Okay. No. Dating is important. He was planning on dating the shit out of Harry just last week.

And maybe one day, if Harry will have him, he will.

He hopes... if Harry could find it in his heart to forgive him for how he's treated him this week.

Louis winces when he thinks back to how he's ignored Harry's messages and phone calls these last few days. But in all fairness, if Harry was going to date someone that's not him, then he's allowed to wallow in some self-pity for a few days, isn't he?

He misses him though. A lot.

He picks up another slice of pizza from the box on the sofa right next to him. He takes a bite- letting out a huff and slumping his shoulders while thinking to himself that he's the biggest idiot on the face of the earth for treating this boy that he loves the way he has.

Just as he reaches for his phone, dead set on apologizing and making it up to the green eyed boy, his head whips around when the doorbell chimes and Louis remembers he had invited Liam and Zayn over. Well mostly Liam- for some footy practice (not really- they're mostly there to keep his mind off the fact that Harry is probably on a date with this Lewis guy- having a wonderful time while Louis can't even stop thinking about him), but Zayn's obviously going to be there because, well... Ziam!

And it's valentine's day.

For a moment he feels bad about wanting them to spend time with him on this day, but then remembers that they insisted. He really does have the best friends anyone could ask for.

He chucks the half eaten piece of pizza back into the box before getting up and making his way over to the door in an unusual slow fashion.

For Harry it is because he feels like Louis has been avoiding him. He has his suspicions as to why, but the thought of Louis really being jealous when he's encouraged him to say yes to Lewis, seems a bit far fetched.

He's sent Louis multiple messages, even tried calling a few times too, but to no avail. Louis would send him a message late at night, when he knows Harry would be asleep with some lame excuse about why he didn't answer or reply sooner. And that was it.

It hurts.

Ever since he's gotten his phone two years ago, not a day went by where Louis wasn't the first and last person he'd sent a message to.

He misses it.

He misses the two kisses Louis would always add after his final goodnight message, and the way he felt all giddy about it.

This past week has been torturous to say the least. He's not sure what he's done wrong to deserve the way Louis has been treating him lately.

He's used to having all of Louis' attention.

All the time.

Which is why he's a little confused and nervous when he rings the doorbell and hear shuffling coming from inside. He knows it's not Jay, because his mother told him she's at work today.

Why did Louis lie to him?

He told him he was going to be at football practice, and that's where Harry went as soon as he got home from school... only to be met by an empty field and without even thinking about it, he started riding his bicycle through the neighborhood until he stopped in front of Louis' house.

He just wants to see him. Hug him. He's missed him. His Louis. His Boo.

He's still thinking about what he's going to say now that he knows Louis had lied to him on purpose, but his thoughts gets interrupted when the door swings open revealing a shocked looking Louis facing him, his jaw hanging slack.

"Thought you had footie practice." Harry finally says, a hint of cheeky sarcasm in his voice while raising an eyebrow. Definitely not expecting Louis' response.

"Thought you were on a date with Lewis."

"What?" Harry exclaims confused. "Why would I be on a date with Lewis?"

"Because that's what boyfriends do, Harry. They go on dates. Especially on Valentine's day." Louis states like it's the most obvious thing in the world- kind of annoyed that he even has to answer the question in the first place.

Harry only stares at him. His thoughts running wild. Louis thinks he's dating Lewis? He called him Harry. And Harry knows that's his name, but Louis has never used it. The multitude of butterflies erupting in his stomach at the sound of it, is unwelcome to say the least. Any other time he would have revelled in the feeling, but not right now. Not when he's sure that Louis used it out of what he thinks is anger?

"Good. Then my question stands. Why would I be on a date with Lewis?" Harry finally replies, a frown edged on his forehead as he eyes the older boy.

It's Louis' turn to just stare at the boy in front of him as he makes sense of his words. But when he does his eyes grows wide and a smile finds its way to his lips. And in that moment he really wants to wrap his arms around Harry and kiss away that silly little frown.

He doesn't though.

"You mean to tell me you didn't say yes?" He asks instead.

Harry rolls his eyes in annoyance and Louis finds himself thinking that it might be the cutest thing he's ever seen the boy do. Well no, the cutest thing was when Harry ate Louis' slab of chocolate a few years back and then denied it wholeheartedly while his mouth was covered in it. Louis never told him he knew he had lied, the pure excitement and satisfaction on Harry's face when he thought he had convinced Louis it wasn't him, had the older boy almost dying of fond.

"No you dummy." Harry exclaims in exasperation. "I didn't." He adds for good measure.

"So you don't have a boyfriend?"

And Harry thinks he might be missing something. Did he not just say no? As in no- he didn't say yes which would automatically constitute that no- he doesn't have a boyfriend? He's sure he has, but nevertheless he replies again with a soft "No."

Louis stays silent and Harry wishes he knew what the older boy was thinking about. He wishes Louis knew how he felt about him. How this morning when he woke up to yet another stupid late night reply from him, all he wanted was to see him, to be with him, to be hugged by him.

"The boy I want doesn't want to be my boyfriend." He finds himself muttering with a shrug, but Louis catches it and for some reason he seems offended.

"What do you mean he doesn't want to be your boyfriend?" Louis asks, unable to hide the shock at hearing Harry's words. "He's an idiot if he rejected you." He finally adds while stepping forward and wrapping his arms around the younger boy. He's treated him poorly without reason this entire week, the least he could do is be a shoulder to cry on now.

Harry on the other hand thinks that for a sixteen year old, Louis is either clueless or daft. He can't decide which one just yet, but he melts into the hug when the two arms he's missed more than anything is finally wrapped around him once again.

"Yes! Yes you are!" Harry mumbles into his chest and the way Louis' body goes rigid does not go unnoticed.

Again Louis finds himself speechless as he lets go of Harry in favour of leaning back and tilting his head to the side a little to look at him. "What?" He says when the boy's words finally makes sense.

"You heard me." Harry says. His voice soft and he finds himself holding his breath as he waits for Louis to reply.

"Me?" Louis finally speaks. "You wanna be my boyfriend?" He asks and Harry settles on clueless.

"Yes, dummy." Harry replies, playfully poking Louis' chest. "You."

"But I thought-"

"You thought wrong, Lou." Harry cuts him off. "We're soulmates remember?" He adds and Louis finds himself wincing a little as Harry says the word, but it goes unnoticed. "Why would I want anyone else to be my boyfriend?" He asks like it's the most obvious thing in the world.

Louis gives him a timid smile. "You know I was planning on asking you to be my boyfriend today?" He says, not missing the genuine smile that finds its way to Harry's mouth. "But then you told me about Lewis and-"

"And what?" Harry asks, almost offended. In his mind they were way past that subject now. Why is Louis bringing that back up?

"And I didn't want to stand in the way of you finding true happiness, Haz." Louis shrugs. "I could never live with myself if I was the reason you missed out on finding your s-"

"What do you mean finding true happiness? I'm truly happy when I'm with you." Harry cuts him off yet again and Louis can't hide his grin at hearing these words.

"It's just tha-"

"Just ask me already, Boo." Harry interrupts him yet again and sheeeeesh Louis thinks. Is Harry even going to allow him to finish a sentence today?

"Ask you what?" Louis asks, shaking his head a little and Harry thinks he might be leaning a little towards daft now. It does however only take a cheeky eyeroll for Louis to catch his drift, mumbling and 'oh' before a smile that reaches his eyes spreads across his face.

Louis is sure they need to have the whole soulmate conversation first, but the excitement on Harry's face has him deciding against it. There'll be plenty of time to discuss it. Right now, all he wants is to see this boy smile and be happy.

So he takes both Harry's hands into his own, smiling when Harry starts giggling shyly. "Will you be my boyfriend, Hazza?" Louis finally asks in all sincerity while running the pads of his thumbs over the back of the younger boy's hands, definitely not expecting his response.

"Well, that depends."

"I-" Louis cuts himself off. "On what?" He exclaims in exasperation.

"If I say yes, does that mean you'll be my valentine?" Harry trails off and turns around. "Because I've got that." He points to a picnic basket perched on the back of his bicycle.

Louis fondly rolls his eyes. His sure this boy will eventually be the death of him. "Yes love." He replies bashfully. "I'll be your valentine."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Then I'll be your boyfriend." Harry replies, giggling when Louis pulls him closer and he melts into the hug again.

"You're a real menace." Louis chimes up, leaving a kiss to Harry's temple.

"But you love me." Harry states proudly.

And yes. He does. Louis loves him. With all of his heart. "I do." He agrees.

"I love you too, boo."

Previous || Next

[justalarryblog]

Hey beca! How are you? Do you have any recommendations fic like hl already in relationships, mpreg harry, they struggle to have a baby? Or arranged married? That have 100k words above? Thanks

Hi anon, thanks for the message! I'm doing fine, I hope you are too. :)

The only one I have mpreg!Harry that they struggle to have a baby is this one:

I Hope You Dance by @wickedarcher_08 (83k) | Explicit

Louis and Harry have been struggling with infertility for over a year. After many failed attempts, they decide to seek a specialist, but they end up with more than they ever dreamed.

For mpreg!Harry that is +100k words, I have:

Say Something by @kingsofeverything​​ (105k) | Explicit

At fifty years old and recently divorced, Omega Harry Styles isn’t interested in dating. When his doctor suggests a heat and rut matching service, he signs up out of necessity. It’s the only use he has for an Alpha in his life.

Twenty-eight-year-old Alpha Louis Tomlinson aims to change that.

I also have a tag for Mpreg fics in case you wanna check if there's any other to your liking.

For arranged married, I've read these:

Through Eerie Chaos by @mediawhorefics (102k) | General Audiences

For as long as anyone can remember, Old Hillsbridge Manor has always been believed to be haunted. Everyone in the village agrees and keeps a respectful, fearful, distance. New in town after a bad breakup and an internship that led to disappointment rather than a permanent job, Harry Styles figures taking pictures of the decrepit building could be a great new creative project. Or at least a much-needed distraction while he searches for a job and crashes at his parents’ new house. No one warned him about the apparitions though; about the music, the laughter, the people who flicker and vanish when you call after them, the echoes of a past that should be long gone… Harry has never believed in spirits but even he can admit that there’s something weird going on. What starts as mere curiosity evolves into a full-blown investigation and soon enough, Harry finds himself making friends with an aristocrat from the 1920s and struggling with finding the best way to tell him that he’s dead.

The Ghost Hunter AU where Niall lives to prove ghosts are real, Zayn is a skeptical librarian and Harry gets caught up in a century-old mystery and catches feeling in the process.

Part 1 of Through Eerie Chaos

tastes like summer, smiles like may by @outropeace (47k) | Explicit

“Is this true?” Harry grabbed the beta by the shoulders. “Bryce, where did you hear that?”

“There’s rumors going around the castle,” he smirked. “stories about his beauty and his cold attitude. They know he is an omega only because of his scent, but he has never had a heat.”

“Do you know what this means?”

Bryce smirk grew into a big smile. “He can’t give you an heir.”

A cold prince, an alpha with nothing left to lose and a kingdom with a secret.

Praise the Mutilated World by @creamcoffeelou, @delsicle (106k) | Explicit

It was August when everything changed.

By October, the leaves changed, and so did Louis’ heart.

OR: An enemies to lovers dystopian au where Harry is an elite alpha and Louis is a rebel omega with too much to fight for. Every move made is monitored, and a fertile omega’s purpose in life is one thing: to give children to their alpha.

a dream is a wish your heart makes by orphan_account (22k) |Teen And Up Audiences

Fairytale retelling of Cinderella, where Harry is a servant boy who’s too kind, Louis is a prince in an arranged marriage, Liam is Harry’s step brother, and Niall is Louis’ dutiful grand duke.

Si Pudiera Volar by @softfonds (68k) | Explicit

When Harry’s fiancé leaves him for his cousin, he looks the other way for the sake of his happiness. He’ll do anything to forget about him, including joining a monastery. It isn’t until his cousin’s former lover, a pirate, appears that he realizes everything is not as it appears, and an honest pirate might be the only person worthy of his heart.

Or, a fic loosely based on Corazon Salvaje.

The Murmur of Yearning by @mediawhorefics (93k) | Mature

Four years ago, Harry Styles was forced into a marriage of convenience to enrich and ally both his and his promised’s families. The sudden, and slightly suspicious, death of the Marquess of Haxshire, however, brings great disturbance to Crescentfield Hall and, as his late’s husband’s closest male relative, Harry unexpectedly finds himself the head of a family he never felt he belonged to. Between a meddling distant cousin hellbent on inserting himself in Harry’s life, his wicked and mistrustful mother-in-law and his late husband’s advisors refusing to help or take him seriously, Harry struggles in the fight to keep what he’s earned and make the Estate finally feel like home.

Luckily, he doesn’t stand completely alone and finds himself an unlikely ally in Mr Tomlinson, the elusive Land Stewart who has been taking care of the property in the shadows for years. Louis Tomlinson is caring, patient, and unlike everyone else, he doesn’t seem to think Harry committed a murder.

the sanctity of patience by @scrunchyharry (22k) | Teen And Up Audiences

When young Lord Harry was chosen by King Louis of Bavaria to become his husband and prince consort, Harry thought all of his dreams had come through. His illusions came crashing down when he understood it meant living in isolation in the alpine castle of Neuschwanstein with a husband who turned out to be far from what he had hoped for.

His illusions vanished, Harry will have learn to appreciate what has and even, perhaps, fall in love with his imperfect husband and his castle.

Winter Pines and Ocean Eyes by @binarysunsets (14k) | Teen And Up Audiences

Harry is awoken by the sudden weight of his dog across his chest, and he yawns and stretches his arms above his head, relishing the crack of his back the gesture produces and sending Fen tumbling down onto the bed. There’s a niggling sensation that he has something important to do that day, but in his still-sleepy state he’s struggling to recall what it is. When it hits him, he freezes mid-rub of his eyes, and his hand slowly falls to the furs strewn across the bed. His fingers tangle into the fur and he bites his lip.

Right. It’s that day.

The day he’s meant to travel south.

Or, the arranged marriage au between young viking Harry, son of his clan’s chief, and a certain caesar by the name of Louis, heir to the empire.

Liberté by @larriebane(64k) | Mature

AU. 1647. “Pretending you don’t have a heart is not the best way to not get it broken. It’s just the easiest.”

Or the pirate AU I always wanted to write

Teenage Rebellion Never Worked Out So Well by @panda_bear21 (55k) | Not Rated

“I’m an adult!” He glanced down at Harry, who seemed anything but at the moment, where he was definitely on the brink of a temper tantrum. “We’re both adults!” Jay glanced to Anne again, before breathing out a heavy sigh. “Yes, but you’re both adults that do not have jobs and who live off of our money… Which means, you have to do what we say… or you’ll have to find a new place to live.” “You wouldn’t do that.” Louis dared, hoping his glare was enough to guilt trip his mother into calling the whole thing off. Or to tell them that it had all just been a huge joke and they weren’t actually being forced into marrying a complete stranger. “Oh, but we would.”

Or the super cliché arranged marriage fic where things escalate way too quickly.

infinitely all for me by @swallowsmateforlife (10k)| Explicit

The Alpha Louis’ been betrothed to since he was 14 has finally come of age and Louis’ been delivered to his home.

or: the one where they figure it all out

keep me safe, keep me sane, keep me honest by @hilourry (8k) | Explicit

Louis is the Prince of England. All past omega princes and princesses have been married and pregnant at age 18, so his parents arrange him to be married to Harry Styles, the royal family’s PR guy.

Sail Across Me by @iwillpaintasongforlou (21k) | Explicit

Harry is a prince that is about to be forced into marriage against his will and running away to sea seems like a much better option. Louis is the captain of the infamous pirate ship The Rogue and he has a thing for helping defenseless creatures. Especially when they're as pretty as this one.

London is well worth a mass  by @dolphinaaaa (93k) | Not Rated

Louis is an Omega prince of France. When he is 13, he is betrothed to Harry of England for politics. The wedding will seal the alliance between the two coutries. This is their story.

Please feel free to check my fic tags if you want to search for other fics! Happy reading, anon!

[dogsliampaynedoesntinstagram]

I’d love to hear your thoughts on Louis’ class position if you want to elaborate.

What a great question anon - of course I would love to!

Louis was born in Doncaster in 1991. That sentance is a weighty starting point to a discussion about class.  Eight years earlier, Doncaster had been the centre of militancy when Miners were striking to protect the possibility of decent work for working-class people. They had lost - and the price was losing was the devastation of work and the economy in the area.

I’ve always wondered if Len was a miner.  The fact that he was working as a driver, makes it more likely - it’s a really common occupation among people who worked as miners.  But whether or not that story of destruction and devastation is Louis’ family story, it’s still the story he grew up steeped in.

Jay was a working-class single mother at 19 (I think we know enough about her family to be reasonably sure at that).  She would have studied throughout Louis’ childhood, and became a midwife in 2002 (although she had to put it on pause while the big twins were little, she must have gone back to it reasonably soon, because she was a senior midwife by the time she had the little twins).  Jay and Louis’ economic position got more secure as time went on, not least because she got married, but both Jay and Louis have talked a lot about money being tight at various points.  Once Jay was able to work as a midwife again after the twins were born - their family would definitely be in a better position than a lot of families in Doncaster. Both midwifery and selling cars to businesses (which is what Mark did) are borderline jobs when it comes to class.  Although importantly at this point in Doncaster - they weren’t constantly being restructured (we don’t know much about Mark’s work history before he got hte job he had when Louis went on X-factor).  

But (and I think this is really important) - Jay and Mark had very little that they could pass on to their kids - and expectations and experiences of working-class people in Doncaster weren’t getting any better.

So what does that look like from pre-fame Louis’ point of view?  He’s growing up in a place where the ruins of class conflict lost still dominate both the emotional and actual landscape.  At some point, they’re in a position of relative economic security - and there are definitely a lot of people around who want that more.  His Mum is working very hard for this little bit of security, and encourages him to join in the project of becoming middle class,.  But that’s far from the only influence in his life - everything that he’s done since made it clear that he paid attention to the working-class older men in his family and wider circle. And he’s definitely not seen as a middle-class kid to the people around him.  Authority figures feel free to say: ‘you are going to have a miserable shit life and that’s what people like you deserve’.  

Then at 18, everything changes. Suddenly he’s a popstar.  He has more money and opportunities than ever seemed like it would be possible.  But he’s still carrying his experiences of class over the last eighteen years.  I think it’s clear that not every door felt open - that there were lots of ways he would continue to feel like a kid from Donny - and therefore aspects of London that felt closed to him (this is based both on the way he’s described his own experiences).

I think that early 1D was also pretty heavily media trained to be non-threatening.  The London riots happened, just before they were launched.  And the discourse of ‘chavs’ was very much at its peak.  I think it would have been very important to their success that 1D came across as compliant, safe working-class lads.  And I think Louis and Zayn would have been the members who were seen at most at risk of suggesting otherwise.  I think Louis probably understood (he was used to the sort of requests that were being made) - and was reasonably happy complying.  But I think it’s really important not to treat early 1D as their unfiltered selves - the class messages they sent to the audience were central to their success. (I always wonder about Louis saying Manchster United as his football team, rather than Donny Rovers, in the Chris Moyles interview in this context, but obviously that could also be about his boyfriend).

And (this is even more speculative) I think there may have been more going on than that.  It’s very noticeable that until mid 2012 - Louis isn’t being styled in a way that might make him come across as more straight.  I don’t think that can be an accident - I think Caroline knew what she was doing.  I’ve always wondered if that was about class - that the most important thing for Louis’ presentation in that first little bit, was making sure that he didn’t come across as a dangerous and unruly working class lad - and if that meant he came across as more gay - well that wasn’t that big a worry.  I wonder what that was like for Louis, to experience how others viewed his class-background and his sexuality as incompatible.

As time went on that obviously changed - Louis’ embraced working-class Yorkshire signifiers much more, in speech, life and styling over the latter years of 1D.  Again there’s a lot going on and it’s hard to tell what’s causing what.  I think it’s clear that football was really useful to him as a way of making sense of the world (I’m thinking of him linking to Joey Barton’s Oxford Union address). 

As all this is happening, things are only getting worse in Doncaster, for the kids he went to school with.  After the 2008 crash, and the austerity that followed, South Yorkshire’s economy contracted more than Greece’s.  He’s aware of this, although he only mentions it obliquely - by talking of liking a Russell Brand video where he talked about the same thing.

In 2017, Louis launches his solo career and he explicit discusses class for the first time.  He describes himself as a ‘chav’.  Now most of my response to this has been pure rage at the class hatred that circulates in fandom.  But in terms of understanding Louis, there’s much more to say.  The first is that it is a selective presentation of himself.  When Louis talks to a radio host who grew up on a council estate, it’s clear that he didn’t.  

But also class discourse has moved on by this point - post referendum the working-class isn’t being presented as unruly young white kids who want things they shouldn’t, but angry older white men who don’t like what’s been taken away from him.  I’m really interested in this choice, because I think people involved must have known about this change.  I think sexuality probably again played a role - now being seen as an unruly working-class young person was less risky and being seen as gay was much more risky.  But also how much of this was about Louis’ understanding of class and his life being stuck when he became famous? Quite a lot has happened since 2010.

But on top of that - I think it’s really clear throughout his solo career how much his class background and experiences means to him.  We particularly see it in the music videos.  The decision to do the Two of Us video is one thing, but the way Louis connected with Richard is so much more.  ‘Chav’ Louis may not be the whole truth - but it’s obviously pretty key to who he is.  

So to sum up, I think Louis grew up surrounded by quite explicit class understandings, both of loss and resistance.  He’s made it clear that older men’s experiences was quite important to him (and in the 1990s in Doncaster that’s quite a specific set of experiences).  He wasn’t ever quite able to be the person who would fulfil his mother’s class ambitions through education, but obviously fulfilled them in another way.  That required him to manage and present his class position for an audience to be consumed - and made the relationship between class and sexuality not just a private set of questions, but something that his whole team would have a say in. As an adult, he has reclaimed and rejoiced in his class culture and background.  This is sometimes very processed and presented as part of his branding, but it also seems to reflect how he interacts with the world. 

[1ddotdhq]

👐🏻 Sat Sept 19 ‘20⚓️

Gigi’s mother posted another photoset on instagram yesterday assuring her followers that Gigi is still pregnant, including a picture with many hands on Gigi’s belly. The hands that were notable missing? Zayn’s! Don’t worry, I’m sure he will pop up soon enough to talk about another boxing match or his FIFA games. The photos weren’t, however, dated, so they could have been taken at any time in the last few months. Honestly, I want to be on their side about this, but they are doing their level best to be the shadiest they can be about the birth of this child! 

Hip hop/rocker and Doncaster native Youngblud (real name Dominic Harrison) did an interview with Hits Radio, where he talked about ‘exchanging DMs’ with Louis, a ‘fellow Donny boy’, about catching a Rovers game on Boxing Day. He was quite close to Fizzy (“God Bless”), but has apparently never actually met Louis. About Doncaster, he said, “every time I go back, it kind of gets a bit better. I remember walking through Donny town center, there’s loads of Pride flags in Doncaster, and I’m like WOAH this is SICK, we’ve really come a long way!!” One of the comments then said, “You look like an e-boy version of Harry Styles”, to which he replied, “I’ll take that! I’d quite like to kiss Harry Styles, actually”. Sorry, Dom, I don’t think Louis’ll be DMing you anymore! 

Speaking of Harry, it was not, actually a Baby Yoda sticker on his phone yesterday, but rather a Kid Harpoon one! It features a rope wrapped around an anchor and two harpoons sticking out either end. I...don’t know why Kid Harpoon has his own merch, but there you have it! Meanwhile, fans continue churning out discourse about his and Louis’ shared shirt. Is he larrie-baiting for the sake of his Grammy campaign? Um, no. To be doing so would mean that he would have known that Louis had one of these VINTAGE, SOLD OUT shirts, have bought one BEFORE they sold out, and have waited for years until a picture of Louis in the shirt came out. THEN, he would have had to be walking around London hoping that someone would recognize him near the dentist’s office (in a beanie and a mask) and hope that they would release the picture rather than keep it for themselves. AND he would have had to time all that with the moment it would best serve his career. So, either that one picture was years in the making, or he sometimes wears his boyfriend’s T-shirts. Take your pick about which seems most likely, I guess! 

Now let’s talk about some less happy news: since the early days of the band, the boys did a lot of funding and charity work for Believe in Magic, which is a charity that was meant to help children with terminal illnesses fund their treatment. It was started in 2012 by supposed cancer survivor Meg Bahri, who was 17 at the time, and her mother. Anne Twist was the first person related to the boys to patron the charity, which she did by doing a fundraising climb of Mt. Kilimanjaro. Jay Deakin then took up the cause in 2014, and, in 2015, Louis threw his famous Cinderella ball for the children that this charity was meant to benefit. Emily passed away in 2018, at age 23; it was said, at the time, that she succumbed to her brain tumor. 

Then, earlier this year, it was discovered that funds were inexplicably missing from the charity. There was not enough evidence to charge anyone with a crime, but it was incriminating enough that the charity was forced to dissolve. If that wasn’t enough, it has just been discovered that Meg did not, actually, die of a brain tumor, but rather of complications due to a fatty liver. While it is true that chemotherapy could cause such complications, her medical records showed no evidence of a tumor ever existing, and her mother was either unwilling or unable to provide supplementary records that would substantiate their claims. It does quite seem that everyone who sponsored the charity - Louis and Harry included - were duped. It is unclear how this fraud affected the other children who were the beneficiaries of the charity. I hope they saw the money that was meant to go to their treatment. However, when having these hard conversations, I would urge everyone to remember that a tragedy HAS occurred - this girl has died. Maybe we don’t have the exact details of her diagnosis, but clearly she was sick in some way. 

[louistthegreatest]

i don't keep up with harry and i have 0 contact with his fanbase....... can u tell me why u think he's an asshole?

Hi anon, 

Tbh if you read the posts I’ve been reblogging you can have an idea... 

I’m not a 1D fan so I can’t really talk much about that era but for what I’ve seen since a year ago, when I became a fan of Louis, Harry seems to be way different from that sweet boy that adored his bandmates (I’m talking about the early years of 1D only) and which is the idealized Harry that larries and ot5 fans have... None of the guys is perfect (nobody can be perfect) but Harry and his team are the cherry on top of being contemptible... He’s the one who has all the attention and all the money to be promoted so, his team paying to publish articles dragging Louis or any of his ex band mates is not necessary, and yet, that’s what they do as soon as any of the other guys has a little bit of publicity or possitive stuff coming... Same with his fans, who are bullies praised publicly on Twitter by Jeff Azoff when they were telling Liam to literally kill himself (after he confessed he has suffered depression and drinking problems)

You know, I didn’t knew what to think about Harry when I became a fan of Louis... It seems for most people that you must become a fan of Harry if you are a fan of the other guys, which is quite stupid and also quite curious because it’s definetely not the other way round and if you become a harrie, you are expected to hate Louis (specially) and the other 1D guys... But then the Euphoria episode happened and it repulsed me to know that Harry knew all the time about that episode because it was written by a friend of his, while no one contacted Louis to ask permission or at least to let him know what was going to be broadcast. So when Louis complained (with all the reason to do it) he was roasted by the press, harries and larries calling him homophobe and trying to ‘cancel’ him... You don’t do that to a friend and you don’t do that to a person you respect. Just like you don't remain completely silent for years while your own fans and the people who work for you insult, despise and create lie after lie to boycott the image of your friends and bandmates and you make like you don’t even know who they (your bandmates) are... That, coming from a man who preaches TPWK is quite ironic... 

Let’s not forget how he queerbaits waving rainbow flags for his lgbt+ fans while writing albums about women and eating pussy for his hetero ones, how he says sexuality is “funny” when there’s people litterally being killed or imprisioned for being gay and millions forced to be on the closet... And I think it was on that interview too where he refered to Louis’ mum as “someone’s mum” which is quite ‘sweet’ from him, knowing how Jay adored him and even invited him to her wedding... Another point for TPWK man.

I could also talk about how he doesn’t give a fuck about fans not being wealth enough to buy his Gucci merch or very expensive concert tickets... He’s white and very privileged, he exudes that image, he makes himself  seen as untouchable and superior to the other 1D guys, his team works hard for him to be seen as he’s the elite and the rest are peasants and his fans think they are entitled to act on the same way too, again being bullies and having total support from H’s team... 

Just the fact that half of his career has been made by boycotting non stop to Louis (specially) Liam and Zayn, with his full consent and participation in it, is enough for me to despise him...

[laxtolhr]

Title: Tomlinson. Louis Tomlinson.

Summary:  “Louis… These new lyrics are kind of…” Niall tries to find a way to vocalise his thoughts without tearing his friend down. “Well they seem darker than what you normally write.”

“Yeah. This almost sounds like heartbreak.” Harry friend and flips through the lyric sheet he was handed. “Hauntingly beautiful, but definitely not what you usually give us.”

Louis shrugs. “That’s all I have right now. Take it or leave it.”

Written for @wrckmyplans for the @sololouiegiftexchange . It’s super late, but I’ve never been good with deadlines. I really hope you enjoy it!

1949

“I just don’t understand this need you have. Can’t you just be happy settling down and working at an office?”

Louis sighs as he shakes his head. “I crave attention. During the war, I would do comedy routines in the trenches at night and it… Well it helped make things a bit more bearable. And it showed me I could be the next big thing. Imagine, me! The next Abbot or Costello!”

Jay continues to wipe furiously at a sticky spot on her counter. “I don’t know, Lou. The girls are still in school and they need a good strong role model to look up to. Just think about if your father was still here how-“

“Well he’s not. He was a dirty lowlife who walked out of his family. I don’t want to think about what he would do.”

A silence falls over the kitchen.

“Fine,” Jay says quietly. “If you think London is where you have to be to make this work then go to London. Just promise me you’ll keep your name. These show business names are getting too much nowadays.”

——————

“Hi, I’m Tomlinson, Louis Tomlinson.” He throws his suitcase onto his bed and holds his hand out for his new roommate to shake.

The boy, Louis assumes he can’t be much older than sixteen, tentatively takes his hand and shakes it. “Is that your real name or stage name?”

“Both,” Louis pulls his arm back with a shrug. “Told me ma I’d keep it the same. She’s not a huge fan of fake names.” He takes a look around the room.

It’s not much. A single roomed flat with enough room for two beds and an even tinier kitchen space. There’s just enough space for a framed picture of his family and his radio, but he guesses it will do. He’s always heard of the actress accommodations in New York City across the ocean, but he never realised London had the same kind of boarding set up for both men and women.

“And you are?”

“Oh, right.” The boy grins sheepishly before pushing his curls away from his eyes and smiling widely. “Harry Styles, at least that’s my stage name. Didn’t think anyone would look twice with a name like Edmond Thatcher so I decided on something simple and elegant sounding.”

Louis nods. “I like it. Easy to remember too. Are you a comedian as well or a more serious actor?”

Harry shakes his head as he sits on his bed. “I’m actually a singer. There are two other blokes down the hall as well who are singers. We do some gigs together when no one is looking for a single, but a quartet is really in right now. We want to be the British equivalent to the greats in America- Sinatra, Martin, Lawford, you know?”

“Sounds like a laugh, mate. I’m not the best singer, but if you all ever need a fourth I’d be happy to accompany you. Figure knowing some friends might be a good place to start in the city.”

——————

1951

“You sure about these lyrics? They seem a bit… Cheeky.” 

Louis rolls his eyes and takes the papers from his friend’s hands. “Liam, what did we talk about last week?”

Liam frowns, eyes going soft. “You take care of the lyrics and I do the instrumental. The big band sound though doesn’t really lend itself to these types of lyrics.”

“Oi, that’s the beauty of music, Payno. You can cross genres.” Louis pulls out a cigarette from his jacket pocket and quickly lights it as he continues to look at his work. “Think about it. Bing Crosby, one of the biggest names in music, was doing a spin on Irish folk songs. Mixing and melding genres is innovative.”

“But these lyrics-“

“Are risqué and real and what we should be singing.”

The door to the studio opens to reveal Harry and Niall, the fourth member of their quartet, carrying sandwiches from the local deli. “Honestly, Louis, do you have to smoke without the window open? Some of us need to protect our vocal cords from the damaging effects of smoke.”

Rolling his eyes once more, Louis moves to the other side of the room and opens the window. “Need you both to take a look at these lyric sheets and give an honest opinion. Payno and I were having a discussion about them, but a fresh set of eyes might be helpful.”

Niall picks up the papers and begins to read over the words. “I’m feeling something deep inside, hotter than a jet stream burning up. I got a feeling deep inside, it’s taking, it's taking all I got?”

He frowns and looks at the lyricist. “Are you singing about an orgasm?”

“Thank you,” Liam says exasperatedly. “It’s too risqué for us.”

“Hold on.” Harry has Niall repeat the lyrics again. “I see where you could think he’s singing about an orgasm, but what if he’s singing about his feelings? Maybe he’s in love and it’s just overwhelming? Sounds like he’s being consumed by feelings.”

Louis takes the last drag of his cigarette before stamping it out against the window ledge. “Honestly, it is about an orgasm, but like Harry said it could be about feelings. I’ve personally never been in love so I can’t relate, but I’m sure someone out there can or even one of you three. Come on, lads, we’ve got great content. Why are we scared of a little controversy?”

The room is silent for a moment as they all have a quick think.

Finally, Liam sighs. “Fine. We can move forward with this song, but we cannot continue with your song about an actual erection.”

——————

“And so I told him he could go fuck himself.”

The whole table laughs at the witty banter of Nick Grimshaw. He was one of the most influential men in all of England and being on his good side meant you went far. He was out with his colleagues to enjoy a simple lunch at the Ritz and that was it.

“Excuse me, sir, but we have an act coming in soon and I know how much you despise having live music while you dine. They are set to take the stage in about ten minutes.”

Nick thanks the server and slips him five pounds for the information. “Well, that seems to be my cue to wrap up this impromptu lunch affair. Quite sad though. I was so enjoying catching up with all of you.”

“Maybe,” Aimee interjects, “we could stay then. I know you’re not one for live music, but perhaps just this once would be alright. Consider it a fun impromptu concert just for us.”

There’s murmurs of agreement around the table. It had been a long time since the last entertainment party Grimshaw had thrown and his guests were eager for more glitz and glamour.

“I guess a few songs wouldn’t hurt, would it?”

The restaurant lights dim slightly as a quartet takes the stages.

“Ladies and gentlemen, please give a warm welcome to Amor Amore.”

A smattering of applause is heard as the swelling of the strings start. The table watches in glee as the four younger men entertain and sing their hearts out for the esteemed guests.

A couple songs turns into a whole set, which quickly turns into a few hours. Grimshaw barely realised that it’s nearly the late afternoon hours until he had been asked if he and his guests were staying for dinner as well. He politely refuses, but demands that one of the quartet comes out to meet him.

“What are you up to, Nicholas?”

“I want to know if they have a record. I’d love to have their music playing at one of my small gatherings.”

——————

December 1955

Louis exhales slowly and watches the smoke curl up into the wintry air. He hates these high class functions. They’re so ostentatious and over done. It’s always the same shitty jazz and same men and women drinking the same old champagne and laughing at the same old jokes. It never meant anything and he wondered how much longer he had to be there until it had been long enough and he could leave. “There you are,” a voice whispers in his ear and there’s a gentle hand on his elbow. It’s Liam, of course it is, and he’s looking at his friend with worry in his eyes. “You can go in like twenty minutes. I know this really isn’t your scene, but being here means the world to Harry, you know?” “That’s why I’m here at all. The whole party and schmoozing scene belongs to Harry and Niall. Sometimes I wonder if you even like it, but then I remember that Sophia is always with you so you have a reason to enjoy it.” The older boy shrugs and downs the last of his champagne as a man up on the stage clears his throat. A hush falls over the partygoers and soon enough the man on stage- Nick Grimshaw- smiles brightly. “Welcome, elite and A-listers. Tonight, I wanted the very best for you all, but I couldn’t very well ask Amor Amore to perform since they’re guests tonight.” A laugh rips through the group of celebrities and important figures. “So, I asked around and I’d like to introduce Zayn Malik to the stage. He’ll be providing the music for tonight. Thank you all for attending tonight. Enjoy the party and happy Christmas everyone.” The guests cheer and holler happily before going back to what they had been doing, ignoring the singer as he took the stage. Louis rolls his eyes and grabs another glass of champagne as the overused jazz sound starts to come from the piano. He can’t see the man, but he assumes he’s like every other wannabe jazz singer- a head of clean cut lines and a smart looking suit wanting to evoke visions of Frank Sinatra from across the pond. “The field was bright with clover, I saw the finish sign. I started as a rover and then victory was mine. I thought the race was over, but they just keep moving the line.” The brunet freezes as the voice pours through the speakers around the room. The voice is breathy and washes over him in gentle waves. He thinks over the name that Nick had mentioned to see if he could place this beautiful voice, but nothing was coming to him. “They cheered at my persistence, but prayed for my decline. The path of least resistance led to Hollywood and Vine. I tried to go the distance, but they just keep moving the line.” He pushes through the women in beautiful little numbers and men in expensive suits to get to the stage. He has to see the man and know what the owner of this voice looks like. He knows he accidentally spills a drink on some woman’s gown, but he doesn’t even have time to apologise as he spots the edgy pompadour sitting atop the performer’s head. “I jumped all of the hurdles to break out of the pack. I started on the outside and then hit the inside track. I left the other fillies back at the starting gate; was ready, on my mark, I got to set to hurry up and wait.” Louis finally pushes through the last of the crowd and finds himself at the foot of the stage. His mind goes blank as he sees the man is his element. He watches as the man tenderly holds the microphone stand and sways to the sound of the jazz music that swells behind him. The man loves his craft, something Louis hasn’t been able to relate to in a long time. The passions and emotion radiating from the man and his voice are enough to send shivers down Louis’ spine.

The attitude was infectious. It made Louis want more for himself. More than just being one of four. He wanted to be appreciated for his lyrics instead of being censored. He wanted that jazzy sound that didn’t quite fit with a melding of four voices.

He wanted to be solo. He wanted to be free of record producers and radio play and measurements of success for a company. He wanted to be successful for himself. He wanted to be more than just a number. He wanted to be a true artist. “So talent and ambition won me a chance to shine. I aced the big audition, but it's rainin' on Cloud Nine. Can't beat the competition 'cause they just keep moving the line. I handled every corner, each bump along the track, and when I saw the ribbon, well, there was no turning back. I won the photo finish, I posed for all the men, but before I got my trophy, well, the race began again.” Louis lets his eyes drag up to the singer’s own and he startles when he notices that they are locked on him. He’s looking straight at him and winks lightly as he continues to sing his song. “So I made friends with rejection, I've straightened up my spine! I'll change each imperfection till it's time to drink the wine! I'd toast to resurrection, but they just keep moving the line! Please give me some direction, ‘cause they just keep moving the line!” The song ends and there’s polite clapping before the chattering continues as if the singer was merely an inconvenience to them. Louis claps loudest of all and reaches a hand up to him. He quirks his head to the side and takes his hand, smiling brightly when Louis shakes it emphatically. He looks at him, trying to read why one fourth of the biggest music in all Britain is interested in his music. “Can I take a request for you, sir?” “Just another song in general so I can watch a wonderful performance. I assume you already have a set planned out, so I won’t bother you with extra songs. When you take your break though, I’d be delighted if you’d join me for a chat.” Louis whispers to the man as he smiles at him and backs away so he can sing again. The singer’s eyes follow him until he’s swallowed up by the crowd and he wonders what just happened.

——————

“Thank you. I’m going to take a small break and be back in thirty minutes. Have fun and happy Christmas everyone.” Zayn says as he ends his seventh song and heads off stage. He’s immediately accosted by the man from before and handed a glass of champagne. “Do you smoke, Mister Malik?” Zayn nods quietly and follows the man outside to the balcony where he lights up a cigarette and hands his one as well. “You have a lovely voice. I thought Nick was just going to hire another wannabe Marilyn, but you’re actually talented.” “Thank you, Mister…?” “Tomlinson. Louis Tomlinson,” he sips at his drink and waits for the recognition. Zayn doesn’t disappoint, although he tries to conceal his excitement. “Louis Tomlinson? Like, from Amor Amore? Oh god. You’re one of the most influential men at this party. I’m lucky to have caught your ear then.” He chuckles, eyes crinkling with his smile. “Your lyrics caught my attention. The fact that you look like you actually enjoy what you do is just a bonus. I was wondering… Would you want to accompany me home tonight? I’d love to hear more music from you.” “You mean… You want to work with me?” Zayn frowns and tries to see the downside to working with someone as powerful and influential as him. This could make or break his career. “Of course. Why else would I invite you back to mine?” Louis seems genuinely confused for a moment before he realises just how rude that may have come across. “Oh! Not that I’m saying you might not be a good friend or anything, but I hardly know you. I’m sure that if we work well together a friendship won’t be far behind though.” Zayn’s sigh of relief and happiness must have been evident. “Well, music I can do. The friendship stuff will depend on how well we work together, Mister Tomlinson. I’m more jazz and Elvis inspired and you’re well known for… Well, big band don't exactly mix with my genre at times.” He smiles and the conversation continues as they laugh and get to know each other. Time seems to go by so fast and soon enough, Nick and Liam are joining them on the balcony. “Malik, you’ve been on a break for well over the thirty minutes you promised.” “Louis, we’re leaving if you want to join us.” Louis looks up at the two men and smiles easily enough. “Sorry about keeping your star, Grimshaw. He’s got a great sound and an ear for music. If you hire him for more events, I’d actually enjoy coming to these parties.” He shakes Zayn’s hand once more before he has to hurry back to the stage. “Oh. And, Liam, I’ll be catching a taxi home tonight. I’ll be waiting for Zayn to finish his contracted set.” He heads inside and leaves the two men on the balcony as it begins to snow lightly. “Oh, Nicholas Grimshaw, what have you started.”

——————

Mid-January 1956

Louis smiles politely up at Zayn as he continues to play a melody that only he knows. He brought the other man to the studio a few hours before the lads were set to join him on another writing session. He doesn’t know what the appeal and draw is to Zayn Malik, but all he knows is that he’s drinking it up like milk and honey.

“All I want is to be up on a stage singing songs I can relate to.” Zayn scrunches up his nose. “Instead, I made the round at parties and corporate events and I sing the same thirty songs in rotation. It’s tiring and makes me want to pack it up and go home.”

“So do it then. Stop singing all these songs by others and start singing your own.” Louis looks up at him with a confused expression. It isn’t that hard for Louis.

Zayn leans heavily onto the baby grand piano and smiles softly. “I can’t write songs. I’ve tried. I’m not good at rhythm without a melody and words just aren’t my strong suit. The song I sang at Mister Grimshaw’s party was an original and that alone took me ten years to write.”

Louis perks up. “Let me write for you. I’m sure I can get some great material and have you headlining in no time.”

“Writing for someone else?”

Zayn and Louis both turn to see the other lads standing in the entranceway to the studio room. Zayn has the decency to look like he’s been caught doing something naughty.

Louis just shrugs, not seeing the issue. “Of course. It’ll be great! He’ll be a proper performer in no time.” He straightens up at the piano and starts to play a quick and jaunty melody as he hums along to the music in his head. “It’s simple. Just have to think of an image you want. You want to be the next Elvis? Easy.”

He taps back and forth between two notes as he tries to think of lyrics to put as his opening lines. “If…” he pauses until it hits him. “If you say something is taboo, well, that’s the thing I wanna do. Do it till we’re black and blue, let’s be bad.”

Zayn laughs as he watches Louis start to create a song on the spot. “How do you come up with stuff so quick? Those lines alone would have taken me days! I should introduce you to my friend Taylor. She’s good at this kind of stuff too”

“It’s easy! You just have to think about the message and go from there.” Louis smiles brightly, the praise feeling good. “And I’d love to meet your friend. Would love to bounce songwriting ideas and tips off someone new.”

Liam, Harry, and Niall all look at each other with worry in their eyes. It could only get worse from here.

——————

February 1956

“Has anyone seen Louis?”

Niall shakes his head as he watches Liam pace the radio station lobby. Being invited to spend air time at the BBC with Nick Grimshaw is a privilege that not many artists got, but of course, Louis is nowhere to be found.

“We’ll just say he’s feeling under the weather. Nick won’t mind if there’s three instead of four of us. In fact he’ll probably prefer it.” Harry shrugs. He’s quite upset with Louis, but there’s nothing that can be done about it now.

Niall has a feeling that they haven’t finished with this conversation, but he plasters on a fake smile when Grimshaw rounds the corner.

——————

After the interview, they’re all piling into Liam’s car when the conversation starts back up again. “Let’s just go to his house. He can’t ignore us if we just show up. That would be entirely too rude.”

“Would it? Well, knowing you have an appointment and not showing up is rude as well. Unless you are on your deathbed, you show up. You’ve booked someone else’s time, so don’t waste it.” Liam starts his car and heads towards the absent singer’s home. “If he’s there, then we need to have a serious talk with Louis.”

Niall frowns. “I think it’s nice that Louis found someone to occupy his time. You know he’s never really been one for singing. He wanted to be a comedian and was just helping us out when we got this big. He’s just along for the ride. Maybe Zayn will be good for him.”

“Good for him? Niall,” Liam tightens his grip on the wheel as his anger grows. “He’s throwing away his career- ours as well. He’s only thinking about himself which he can’t do anymore. He has to realise that he can’t take a break or write what he wants. We’re a group- a team.”

“Yes,” Niall decides to cut off the angry tirade before it really starts growing, “but we’re also friends. As his friend you need to realise that he’s never been happy doing this and we’re killing his creative ideas more than letting them flourish. Maybe… Maybe we should give him an out. He seems so much happier writing for Zayn.”

Harry clears his throat. “Or we could stop insisting he choose. He loves writing for Zayn- we know that- but he also loves performing. So we get someone else to write for us or one of us finally steps up and helps out, big deal. Louis deserves to be just as happy as the rest of us.”

Liam sighs as they pull into the wrap around drive out front of the singer’s home. “Can we at least be upset with him for missing the interview this morning?”

“Depends on why he missed it.”

Turning off the engine, Liam grabs his spare key to Louis’ home. 

It’s fairly quiet when they enter. The usual record music playing softly in the background and a warm glow coming from the main room is the only hint that Louis is even home. Niall is about to call out when a giggle catches his attention.

And then a woman’s shoe.

“Guys? Do you think we should-“

“Oh, Lou!”

Harry’s face turns bright red. “We should come back at a later time. I don’t think now is really an opportune moment.”

——————

March 1956

“Taylor, I promise.” Louis softly speaks into the telephone. He’s meant to be warming up for the show, but he had called Taylor instead. The girl was staying at his place to take care of his dog while he was away, but he found himself calling every night to check up on her.

“I just want to hear you say it again, Lou. Please? Just one more time- for me.”

He sighs, but can’t help the soft smile on his face as he thinks about her. He can picture her all curled up in his most comfortable chair in the study with Cliff and Bruce at her feet and a heavy book of poetry resting easy on the table where the phone receiver sat. He knows that she’s in those highly fashionable pants that hike up to her navel and a shirt that stops just above so the smallest sliver of skin is visible. Her hair is probably up in a high curled ponytail with a bow tied around it and all he can think about is how much he wants his fingers to be running through her blonde locks. It’s a domestic scene that he never knew he wanted until now.

“I’ll be home tomorrow night. I’ll be home and I’m going to fuck you good and hard until you’re begging me to let you come. It's just how you like it, isn’t it, darling?”

Her giggles are the only reply.

“Tayor, love, I’ve got to go. I’ve got to head to the stage soon.” He bites back those three words on his lips. “I’ll see you tomorrow night.”

——————

“So what kind of music are you leaving me with?” Grimshaw asks as he takes the record from Louis’ hand.

Louis shrugs, trying to keep it light. “Nothing. It’s a record of a friend of Zayn Malik- the man who sang at your Christmas party. I’ve been writing and recording with her and I thought maybe you’d want to be the one to discover her. Give it a listen, yeah?”

“Well,” Nick pushes his chair back from his desk and quickly crosses the room to his record player. “If you’ve written for her, I’m sure the lyrics will be great. I’ve always wondered why you hadn’t written for other artists before.” He places the record on the turntable and carefully moves the needle to the edge of the vinyl surface.

It takes a moment before the striking piano chords are playing loudly in the room. Suddenly Taylor’s voice joins in.

“We were both young when I first saw you. I close my eyes and the flashback starts: I'm standing there on a balcony in summer air. See the lights, see the party, the ball gowns, see you make your way through the crowd and say, ‘Hello.’ Little did I know...”

The music swells slightly and Louis tries not to smile as he can tell Nick is already hooked. He wrote this song drawing on Taylor and his relationship. He had always wanted to tell a story that wasn’t quite so dirty all the time and finally Taylor’s voice was his own.

“That you were Romeo, you were throwing pebbles and my daddy said, ‘Stay away from Juliet.’ And I was crying on the staircase begging you, ‘Please don't go.’ And I said, ‘Romeo, take me somewhere we can be alone. I'll be waiting. All there's left to do is run. You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess. It's a love story. Baby, just say “Yes”.’”

Nick grabs the needle, plunging the room into silence.

“What are you doing?” Louis is bewildered.

“I want it. I don’t need to hear anymore. She’s got a lovely voice and your writing talents are brilliant, we already knew that. I’ll find a segment to play it on. The sentiment is beautiful, just what this country needs. We’ve had the death of our King and hundreds of countrymen die because of the heavy fog at the end of last year, but this whimsical sentiment is perfect.”

Louis smiles brightly. “So you’ll play it?”

“Absolutely!”

——————

“'Cause we were both young when I first saw you.”

Niall turns towards his friend, smiling happily at the two artists. “You wrote that?”

“Don’t sound so surprised, Niall.” Louis laughs as he grabs his cup of tea from the table beside him. “I know all of our music is erections and orgasms hidden with colourful language, but I can write lyrically beautiful pieces when I want.”

“Well I think you’re brilliant, darling.” Taylor smiles brightly and kisses at his cheek.

Harry rolls his eyes. “You’re only saying that because he’s taking you to bed almost every night.”

“Harry!” Liam looks scandalised. “That is not polite conversation. We don’t speak of that type of thing.”

Taylor just laughs harder. “Oh it’s perfectly alright, Liam. He’s quite right- about the bed part. I think he’s brilliant with or without the sex.”

Liam watches in disgust as Louis falls more and more in love with her. He needs to put a stop to this before it goes any further.

——————

They’re at another party when Liam sees his opportunity.

“Taylor,” he says nonchalantly towards the girl on Louis’ arm. “Have you met Simon Cowell? I do believe he’s over there.”

Taylor’s eyes widen as she cranes her next to see the music mogul. “Simon Cowell? He’s only the biggest name in music that isn’t an act. Anyone who’s anyone is contracted by him.”

Liam nods. “Would you like me to introduce you?”

“Would I!” Taylor lights up like a Christmas tree. “You wouldn’t mind, would you, darling?”

“Of course not.” Louis smiles and kisses at her cheek. “In fact, I’m going to use the lavatory. Liam can introduce you while I’m gone.”

Taylor smiles brightly and watches him walk away. Her eyes shift to Liam, the smile turning into something a bit darker as her focus shifts. “Well aren’t you going to introduce me?”

Liam can only smirk. He knew there was a reason Taylor stayed with Louis. Hook, line, and sinker.

——————

August 1956

“Louis… These new lyrics are kind of…” Niall tries to find a way to vocalise his thoughts without tearing his friend down. “Well they seem darker than what you normally write.”

“Yeah. This almost sounds like heartbreak.” Harry friend and flips through the lyric sheet he was handed. “Hauntingly beautiful, but definitely not what you usually give us.”

Louis shrugs. “That’s all I have right now. Take it or leave it.”

“Does this have anything to do with Zayn and Tay-“

“Don’t fucking say their names.” Louis lashes out. “Why would it have anything to do with them? It’s not like they used me to get connections or anything. They didn’t take a journal I had filled with song ideas for- full songs with lyrics and piano chords- and just fucking leave in the middle of the night. It’s not like they suddenly found someone better and left me.”

The studio space is quiet.

“Oh, Louis,” Niall is the first to hurry to his side and pull him into a hug. “I’m so sorry. I’m so fucking sorry.”

Louis tries his best to keep his composure, but he catches sight of the song sheets in Harry’s hands and the title hits him hard. Love you, Goodbye almost seemed too sweet compared to the way things actually happened. “I don’t want to do this anymore.”

“Do what?”

“This!” Louis shouts and flings his arms around to encompass the space. “I don’t want to write anymore! No more writing, no more singing, no more performing! I’m done. I’m going back to Doncaster and… I’ll figure it out there.”

“What! Louis, you can’t just-“

“He can though.” Niall cuts off the line of protest he can already feel brewing in his other friend. “Louis, you need to do what is best for you. If that means washing your hands of the industry, so be it.”

Louis nods. He never wanted to sing anyway.

——————

February 1961

Louis sat in his home staring at photos from a different time. His mother, god rest her soul, had made him keep everything he brought back to Doncaster- even photos that brought back bad memories. He’s busy staring at one of him and Taylor smiling brightly with Zayn off in the background smirking like he knew something they didn’t. In the end, Zayn did know something Louis didn’t; he knew the plan to break Louis’ heart and rob him of any creativity.

He doesn’t know why he pulled this album out. He knew looking over these pictures were going to hurt more than anything. He chalks it up to the wave of nostalgia he felt this morning after hearing Niall’s voice singing to him through the radio.

It was weird, hearing Niall solo for the first time. He kept expecting Liam to join in with his higher harmonies and round out the sound, but there was nothing but Niall’s soft baritone crooning away about love and loss.

Finally something Louis could relate to.

He had felt his hand twitch at the first note from Niall’s mouth. The usual twitch that meant he should be writing. He hadn’t felt it in awhile and figured it had been a knee-jerk reaction. That had been hours ago though and he could still feel the tug in his mind and heart.

He hadn’t written anything in five years? Why would he try again? Was if he was shit at it?

Letting out a long suffering sigh, he grabbed a pencil and some paper. He stared at the photos for inspiration. He could take this pain and make a song. He had done it before. He could do it again.

He just needed the words.

------------

December 1962

Louis stood backstage, nervous and ready to pass out. Tonight at the London Palladium, the biggest variety show in all England was trying to pull off the biggest surprise of the decade.

He looked to his left and smiled as he saw Niall tuning his guitar. He looked to his right and saw Liam doing vocal warm ups. They were all performing individually and then were going to perform a melody of their old songs together. It was going to be a night to remember.

He knew he was on after Niall, but he was still debating on which songs he should do. His backing band was well versed in all his tracks so he could do a last minute change in setlist if he wanted, but he had chosen the four songs for a reason. The lyrics were some of the best he had to offer and he was not going to disappoint.

“And now, ladies and gentlemen, premiering his songs for the first time anywhere Mister Louis Tomlinson.”

Louis blinked a few times before it registered that he had to take the stage. He took one final breath, catching a smile and good luck from Niall, before taking his place on the stage. He thanked the host before turning to his band. “We Made It, yeah?”

He turns back around and looks straight into the camera. It was his time to shine.

[larryfanficwriter98]

Chapter Twelve

Fake It Until You Make It Real

**Side note- 1. It’s a long one. 2.Daniel is Hannah’s boyfriend (not sure if I’ve explained that yet). 3. Fizzy (or Félicité) is not in this story, she was a teenager, not an adult so I do not feel comfortable writing her in like I do with the adults. Also because the adults play essential roles in this story while the sisters/siblings do not. I have not decided if mentioning her at all is in my comfort zone and respectful in my personal opinion with my writing so if you would like her to be mentioned briefly let me know, however she will not be a living or recurring character. If she is mentioned it'll be as respectful as possible with Louis obviously mentioning her or something along those lines. I do not want to come across as rude or disrespectful when it comes to her or any other character who is longer with us, but like I said it did not feel right to write her in just for it to not play a key role in the story and be a brief sentence. I try not to make them (siblings and all) key roles in my stories out of respect since theses stories are about Harry and Louis only, but obviously they'll be mentioned every now and again. Again I'm trying to write this as carefully worded as possible so sorry if it doesn't make sense or comes off badly.****

Harry was up early the next morning as he prepared to make enough donut holes for over a dozen people, most of them being kids. He was excited to finally have the house filled with kids and family and glad today would be warmer than yesterday according to every weather app and website he looked at yesterday before falling asleep with the kids in the bed after they had all cuddled up for a movie in his room. Harry was pulled from his thoughts by arms sliding around his waist and a face pressed against his back making him jerk not having heard Louis.

"You okay?"

"Yeah, I just didn't hear you I was a lost in my thoughts." Louis hummed snuggling into his back, Harry didn't need to look at Louis to know his eyes were still closed and that he was wearing one of Harry's sweaters that fell to his thighs, his briefs probably was just peeking out at the ends, "what are you doing up of you're tired?" Harry asked amused.

"You took your body heat with you." Louis mumbled; it was barely audible, but Harry heard him well enough making him grin.

"Sorry." Harry said, "I had to start breakfast."

"What are you making?" Louis asked resting his chin on Harry's shoulders looking over into the fryer, "ooh something deep fried I like it already."

"Powdered sugar donut holes with little plastic spiders on the piles so they look like spider eggs." Harry said excitedly as he showed Harry the picture that was with the recipe in his homemade seasonal recipe book. Louis was silent for a few seconds before he laughed shaking his head.

"You're lucky you're cute Harold." Louis said pressing a kiss to Harry's cheek before he laid his cheek against Harry's back again.

"You're cuddly this morning."

"I'm tired this morning and you're warm."

"Just admit you're cuddly."

"Never." Louis said kissing his shoulder, "Alright what do you need me to do before everyone arrives?" Louis asked stepping away from Harry and grabbing a mug for his morning tea.

"I think we're all ready for visitors but you - oh baby proofing! I bought baby proofing things this week they're in the basement."

"You bought baby proofing stuff?" Louis asked.

"Well, I've never had babies here so yeah I'm about to have two one year old roaming the house. I figured you were the best one to do that stuff since we never really did Hannah and I, I mean."

"You never baby proofed?" Louis asked looking at Harry who shook his head.

"I bought a large pen and we kept Maddie in there during the day except for naps and such but we did tummy time in there and she crawled in there. When she started walking and wanting to roam, we completely sealed off the living room and kept her there. We didn't have a need to baby proof. I mean obviously we made the room was safe and her crib was where it should be and all of that stuff, but we didn't really have a lot of furniture or outlets so." Harry explained shrugging at the end, "obviously if you and I have a baby one day this house will need to be thoroughly baby proofed and we'll probably spend more money on gates than we will on anything else, but our apartment was probably the size of the living rooms combined. It wasn't that big."

"Not even married yet and you're already thinking about trapping me with a little baby. The audacity." Harry grinned looking over at Louis.

"I'd be more worried if I didn't know you have a Winnie the pooh outfit in the basement storage for a baby girl. Still on the store hanger that is at least a year old."

"It was on sale." Louis said sipping his tea as he walked towards the basement door, "at least you have a warning of what the theme of the nursery is going to be. You can pretend you had a say in it now and suggest Winnie the pooh before I have to go behind your back and do it myself."

"You're lucky I approve otherwise we'd argue."

"No, we wouldn't." Harry chuckled as he heard the basement door click behind Louis before it opened again, "oh by the way its seven months old thank you very much. Not a year. I bought it in March. It was last one of its size and it spoke to me Harry. It said buy me and so I bought it."

"Remind me to never let you know where the credit card is." Louis laughed closing the door behind him.

****

Three hours later both of their families were there, and everything was going smoothly. Anne had looked so shocked and heartbroken but excited when she saw Maddison that Louis had almost cried. He knew his mother had to look away to keep from crying as well. After that however everything went smoothly, and Louis could tell his mother was absolutely in love with Harry.

"So is a baby in the near future for you two?" Anne asked as they stood in the kitchen moving the pudding cups onto the decorative trays. Harry was outside with his mother talking about recipes or something that Louis didn't pay much attention to.

"Not so near that I'll be showing at the wedding but yes it's been discussed. We both wanted to wait until he had custody though so we're not dealing with too much. With my mom an hour and a half away and you guys in London, Liam and Niall working most of the days Harry has off, and Zayn being the only real available last-minute option we don't want to deal with a pregnancy during the craziness that is sure to come." Louis explained looking at her briefly.

"Right, I understand that. So sometime in the next or two."

"Yeah, I think so. I hope so at least. I loved being pregnant with Freddie, it wasn't the greatest experience with my partner, but take him away it was great. Harry is such an amazing dad to Maddie, and he is stepping into the role with Freddie so easily. He missed a lot of Maddie with his school and Hannah doing what she did I know he feels more guilty than he lets on about that."

"He loves her to death and Freddie. You can see it when he looks at them. And you, of course. I thought Harry was in love with Hannah but him looking at you doesn't even come close to him looking at her."

Louis blushed, there was that four-letter word again so soon in the real timeline yet so casually being mentioned today. Harry and he have been carefully avoiding that word, they knew it was too soon, or maybe that was their excuse, so they didn't have to say it so soon. He didn't know. What he did know was that he and Harry both had a conversation about that word and that they wouldn't say it until they meant it. If anyone asked, they would say it wasn't something they just casually said or whatever felt right in the moment. So far no one seemed to notice or think anything of it if they had noticed.

"He's great. I'm really lucky to have found someone like him." Louis freely admitted, "even now he just...I don't have words to tell you everything that I want to list." Anne chuckled nodding

"I'm so proud of him I just wish he would relax a little with saving so much. He was such a careful spender always terrified of spending too much and ending up barely making ends meet."

"Really? I've always thought him a little, not careless, but definitely not cautious. He definitely doesn't come off as a rich boy just someone who has enough money to not blink yknow."

"Yeah, he's very humble, I think. Doesn't show off his wealth any more than he does unconsciously. Though a lot of that is from his childhood, I'm sure he's already told you about that, so I won't go too much into it, but it was hard. Especially since I can see how much they remember it now as adults, I always wished they were too young to remember or maybe it'd be pushed as they got happier memories. I overcompensated a lot when they were teenagers."

Louis nodded even though Harry hadn't actually told him anything of his childhood except a brief mentioning that his mom had been a single mother with two kids. Nothing in depth that would explain what his mother was talking about. And looking back that was Louis' fault, Harry always asked about him and Freddie and their lives. Louis was always too happy to tell anyone about Freddie and his baby years, Louis has never asked Harry about anything. By the way Anne was talking it was obviously not something Harry would just casually mention and had to be asked about it to talk about it. The door slid open before either of them could continue talking and Harry walked in with his mom, the kids, and dogs running into the house.

"What are you two talking about?" Harry asked wrapping his arms around Louis' waist from behind resting his chin on Louis' shoulder.

"Just this and that." Anne said with a shrug, "I asked him about grandbabies."

"I asked Harry about grandbabies too." Jay said.

"Our mothers are conspiring against us." Harry whispered just loud enough for the mothers to hear him; Louis chuckled nodding.

"I think so too. Though my mother should be ready for a break from kids. She has twin toddlers at the moment."

"I can send yours back to you after cuddling them." His mother said.

"Yeah, I've already tried that." Harry told him, "she's prepared."

"Of course, she is. We're going to have to rearrange weekends around, so every grandparent and honorary uncle has quality time."

"Just imagine the weekends without kids though. I'm sure we can think of something to pass the time away."

"HAROLD!"

"What? Practice makes perfect." Louis slapped Harry with the closest item which happened to be a spatula. Harry quickly dodged the swats as he ran out of the kitchen.

***

Trick or Treat was a long three hours filled with adorable kids coming up to them with large grins and most of them greeting Harry by name. Afterwards they spent a few hours laughing and talking in the living room before Harry, Anne, and Jay went into the kitchen to start the pot pies and other food.

"DADDY! I NEED HELP!" Maddie shouted as she came running down the stairs out of her costume, but her hair piece was tangled in her hair which was a whole mess.

"Sweetie, I can't right now, and I told you not to touch your hair without help, didn't I?" Harry said gently.

"But daddy please. Mom said if it gets stuck again, she'll cut my hair." Maddie said crying, "I didn't want it to get stuck and have it cut."

"Maddie sweetie as much as I want to help you I really can't. I told you not to touch your hair now out of my kitchen with your hair please and thank you."

"But daddy you have to help. It hurts and it's a knot and mom says she'll cut it." Maddie pleaded crying more.

"Your mother isn't here to cut it Mads. You'll be fine for an hour as soon as I'm finished, I'll handle your hair, okay?" Maddie stomped her feet and folded her arms pouting.

"But daddy-"

"Maddison. Not right now. In one hour, I can help but I can't right now and that is something you'll have to accept."

"Grandma-"

"Maddison Rayne." Maddison made a closed mouth scream towards Harry as she stomped her foot again before she ran upstairs slamming a door closed. Louis only lasted a minute before he snuck upstairs and poked his head into Maddison's room seeing her sitting on her bed crying.

"Hey, can I come in?" Louis asked getting a nod, so he entered the room closing the door behind him, "you know Maddison I have a ton of sisters and each other has had at least ten knots I've helped get out of their hair all without scissors." Louis told her.

"Really?"

"Of course. I know we haven't had me and you time to talk about your dad and I, but I am marrying him. I'm marrying you too essentially. I know I said I become your stepparent when I say I Do with your dad, but even right now you are my stepdaughter. That means if your dad is busy doing whatever he us doing and you need help you can always come to me and if I can, I will help you as much as you need me to."

"I didn't want to bother you...Daniel doesn't like it when I ask him for help. He tells me I'm not his responsibility just because he's with my mom."

"I'm not Daniel. You are my responsibility this week as much as you are your dads. You're my daughter too, you never have to call me anything you don't want to either it be Papa or Mr. Tomlinson. The title doesn't make the parent, the love and support does, and I love you and will always support you and I will always have your back. In one hour, we can trick your dad into going outside and we can throw water balloons at him as payback for making you cry." Maddison giggled as she wiped her eyes and face with her sleeves and looked at him.

"Really?"

"Yes really. Now how about I help you with this tiara and we paint each other’s nails in a fall color? Sound good?"

Maddison smiled and nodded climbing onto her knees and hugging him tightly. Louis kissed her head rubbing her back before he got up and went to grab the hair things for Maddie's hair in the kids shared bathroom. Maddie had a light pink basket full of curly hair care products and decanters as well as combs and hair accessories. He grabbed it and headed into her room sitting them upfront of her floor length mirror on her closet door and got to work. He never had to deal with curly hair like Maddie’s, but he soon got the hang of it and they never noticed when Harry came up only to stand in the doorway watching as they sang Disney songs and Louis carefully detangled her hair. Maddie had dressed up as Rosie the riveter and Harry had done her up in an updo with her bandana looped through her hair, so it hadn't fallen off and thus when Maddie tried to undo it all she had ended up with a mess. A mess that took over an hour to undo but once it was finished and Louis was able to come through it no problem he went and got the nail polish form her kit.

"Thank you LouLou." Maddie said as she hugged Louis around his neck once their nails had been dried. Louis grinned as he hugged again rubbing her back.

"You are most welcome. You can ask me for help anytime." Maddie nodded, "now how about we go downstairs, and you say sorry. Just a tiny one."

"Okay." Maddison held Louis' hand as they head out of the room and down the stairs. Harry was in the living room with Freddie lying beside him as they laid on the loveseat and watched Wall-E together. Maddie skipped over and carefully crawled on top of Harry situating herself comfortable as she cuddled up to him.

"I'm sorry daddy."

"Thank you, sweetie. I love you you know that right?"

"I love you too Daddy. I was scared but I didn't have to act like that."

"It's okay. Your emotions still get the best of you at times. Your nails are very pretty."

"Thank you LouLou and I paint each other's nails and looky he got my hair untangled without scissors." She said sitting up and pulling her hair over her shoulder to show him.

"I see that. He might be better than me with all the practice he has with his sisters." Harry said as he looked up at Louis.

"Not with curly hair mind you, but enough practice it didn't take us that long to get the worst of it." Louis said folding his arms on the air of the sofa and leaning down to press a chaste kiss to Harry's puckered lips, "besides I'm a big softie when it comes to tears, I only last a minute after she ran upstairs."

"That’s because you're a great Papa who doesn't let a baby cry for more than a minute."

"You mean I'm weak."

"You went through a c-section and want to do it again. I'd call you incredibly strong before I ever call you weak. As much as I wish I could carry sometimes I do not want to go through that and if I had I'd never do it again."

"The only reason I'm so willingly to do it again is because I know this time will be different. I'll have a cute doctor fussing over me as much as I fuss over the baby. I may even be able to have him do the heavy lifting for the first few weeks."

"The lifting, the carrying, the picking up, the bending, you name it, and I shall do it for as long as you need." Harry said pulling Louis back down for an awkward but sweet kiss, "also I'm more than cute I'm drop dead sexy when I'm awake at three on the morning making sure your stitches aren't infected and you're not in pain."

"Oh, right my bad." Louis said rolling his eyes as he straightened up and moved off to where he heard Zayn, Liam, and Niall were at in the other living room drinking and playing FIFA.

"Hey, grab a beer and join us. You have enough designated sober for you and Harry to drink a little." Niall said.

"Let me guess Harry said not unless I did it." Louis guessed folding his arms watching as Liam and Niall blushed guiltily, "I don't care if he drinks you know."

"We know that, but he respects you too much and he probably doesn't want you to think badly of him with y'know his past drinking problem after Hannah kept Maddie from him." Louis also didn't know about that but didn't let it show as he left and grabbed two beers from the fridge then headed to Harry and put one on his chest.

"Will you drink before your friends decide I'm a bad influence on you and controlling you through telepathic connections or something." Louis said.

"What if I don't want to drink."

"All your friends are doing it." Louis teased waving the can upfront of his face making him laugh.

"Peer pressure. Really."

"Yes, now chug it and shut it." Louis said kissing his cheek before heading back to the other room and grabbing the spare controller as he flopped on to the large beanbag chair that the lads had dragged upstairs from the basement living/gaming room.

****

After dinner Louis took his family to the basement where the guest rooms were located for them there were a total of four guest rooms down there, one with a queen size mattress, and two rooms had two twin size bunkbeds with the stairs in the middle and the last one had two full size bunkbeds with the stairs in the middle. Louis helps his mom set up the travel crib then held get the twins ready since Dan was still with Harry getting the bags. The evening turned late and one by one everyone was in guest rooms or bedrooms and Harry and Louis were finally alone and relaxing on the couch with Louis’ back pressed against Harry's front.

"We should get to bed." Harry said.

"I know but I can't get up. I'm tired. Besides, I've got questions for you that I know I will forget if I sleep on them."

"Oh? And what are those questions?" Harry asked amused.

"Niall mentioned you had a drinking problem? When Hannah left?"

"Oh that? Yeah, I guess. I was pissed and my lawyer said there was nothing that could be done until we proved paternity, so I drank and went out to the clubs a lot. It got a bit...obsessive I guess but I never really considered it a problem. Like I could stop I just didn't want to. I was stupid the first six months but then the DNA test came back, and my lawyer said I had to get my life together and so I did. Instantly. One weekend I was at the pubs and the next I was home or working. Guess it didn't really occur to me to tell you that." Louis nodded understanding where Harry was coming from.

"Is that why you won't casually drink?"

"No, I just don't want to be unavailable for Maddie or Freddie if they need something. Liam and Niall don't understand that, I get it y'know they don't mean any harm by it and a few beers never hurt anyone, but I've always been scared of drinking one night and not being able to drive Maddie to the hospital because the ambulances were out of order or something. I don't know. It's a weird parenting nightmare I get every once in a while."

"I will never let you get so drunk you wouldn't be able to function as a father around the kids. That's where I draw the line but drinking with your mates with a dozen people here sober is completely fine. No one will think twice of that."

"I know I just feel wrong...like I'm being judged or something. Choosing beer over my kids. I never want to do that."

"And you never will." Louis promised, "your mother mentioned something today as well. Well, a few things."

"Oh God. Whatever it was I swear there's an explanation."

"No but now I know I've gotta ask her for the good stuff. No, she mentioned your childhood very very very briefly. Like she completely skipped over it thinking I already knew. Which if you don't want to tell me that's fine." Harry tense for a second before he sighed and scooted Louis closer against his front, "you don't have to-"

"My mom was young when she fell pregnant with my sister. She got kicked out of her rich family’s home with nothing but a bag of clothes and a fee bundles of cash. She was able to get a job as a waitress after dropping out of school and she got a studio. My dad, my biological dad that is, he didn't want to lose the money from his money and my mom was young and naive, so she stayed with him. When I came my dad left after taking the money my mom glad hidden away for emergencies. Fast forward two years and my mom was poor, like poor poor. I was potty trained because my mom couldn't afford diapers and because of this the carpet in the living room smell horrible. We had a beat-up couch with a pull-out bed that smelled. When I got older, I remember being so embarrassed by it, obviously I couldn't control it and mom and Gem always said it wasn't my fault, but I hated it. Obviously, it wasn't only me, Gem had accidents too, but it was mostly me. Anyway, my mom spent everything on the electric and water, the two most important things. Then she spent it on her phone so she could be called into work y'know. Then the little she had left was just enough for bread, peanut butter, and sometimes a fruit of our choice to share. So, for most of my childhood we ate peanut butter toast for breakfast and peanut butter bread folded up for lunch and dinner. I can’t eat peanut butter to this day, like plain peanut butter. I can eat it with something but not ever in large amounts.” Louis shifted around so he was able to look at Harry, he played with a bracelet Maddie had given Louis to give to Harry a few weeks ago during art. He was clearly thinking about it from the faraway look he had on his face, “My mom suddenly stopped wanting us to go to the stores with her and she’d bring home groceries. Real groceries. She’d cook and we ate vegetables and fruits and had food we were allowed to snack on. Gemma and I thought she was stealing and so we started telling mom to stop and that we were fine. We met Robin a few days later, mom done everything to get rid of the smell that lingered in the studio apartment.” Harry’s lips twitched in a small smile that only now looking back on it all was he able to release in light humor,

“She bought a mattress from a goodwill and got rid of the couch and had the mattress on the floor for all three of us. I remember mom had us all showed that morning because the water was being shut off the next day and so we all helped do laundry in the bath and then hung them to dry. Robin walked into the door in a lab coat and Gemma started freaking out, crying. She thought mom was giving us away, up for adoption, Gemma was begging mom not letting her get a word in to explain. She told her she would go without food so I could eat and that she would help out as much as she could and went on this rant. It was like she was prepared to plead our case and I don’t doubt she was. I started crying when Gemma went on and on because I was scared, and mom just looked so helpless and guilty. After mom was able to calm us down and explain Robin was a friend of hers and was a doctor, we slowly opened up to him. I was practically his son within a month. He and I just grew close because I asked him about his work, I knew doctors made a lot of money so in my mind I would become a doctor and help my mom out with money. It made perfect sense. Mom and Robin moved fast, I don’t know if mom was just desperate at first or if they had known each other longer than they let on, Gemma and I never asked because Robin was our dad and mom married him. I know mom loves him now, I know mom has loved him for a long time, not sure how long, but long enough that it doesn’t matter anymore to me to know the truth. They met when mom was at work, he’s been a regular for years, but mom never had him as a customer, barely even saw him before then. One day she had him as a customer and I guess they just hit it off. He saw her at the store a few weeks later after a few more times meeting at the restaurant and he told me something just told him to give her his groceries. So, he did. Mom said she was having a bad week that week and that home life was stressful, and her boss had almost fired her so when he gave her his groceries she just cried and told him everything. Just ranted. Poor guy was just trying to do something nice and got ranted at. He drove her home and started tipping her bigger and then asked to buy her and us dinner without us knowing of course. They never really did give us a complete timeline, but they made it sound like it was going on for a few months at least before mom introduced us.” Louis was smiling, chuckling when Harry empathized with Robin being ranted towards, “When I was old enough to realize what happened, like why things changed so dramatically for us, I wrote him this long letter for Father’s Day because it was coming up and I have it to him as soon as he woke up and I left for school. I was pulled out of school not an hour later by Robin and we had a father son week, he literally kidnapped me and took me to Greece only telling my mother when she called him frantic that I wasn’t home after school and Gem hadn’t seen me all day. When we got back Mom was there waiting for us and ripped us a new one right in the middle of the airport. Not giving a damn about who was watching us. That lecture lasted an entire month.”

“Your mom says you’re too cautious with your spending because of it. Is that true?”

“I guess in a way. I mean I have a lot of money from all different kinds of things and this house is completely paid off, I don’t have any debt or loans. I know how much I have in my savings accounts and all of that stuff. I know how much I have inside this house and how much I carry with me. I guess that is something we should talk about whether you want to join our bank accounts or keep them separate or what.”

“Yeah, that is something we should talk about but after I’ve had sleep.” Louis said resting his head in his hand as he stared at Harry, “I couldn’t even imagine it. What you went through. My mom wasn’t the richest, but always made the end meet in the end and we were always full. She may not have been, but we were. She’s a nurse which was good money for one two even three kids, but then more and more babies came. I don’t even know when she found the time or energy. Nor do I want to, but still. She worked so much and did so much in so little hours that sometimes when I look back, I feel like she had magic to make the time slow down. I have no idea how she did everything and still had time for every child that needed her. I guess that’s why I stepped in so early, I saw my mom needed help and so I was there. Changing diapers, feeding babies, changing clothes, burping. Whatever it was. I don’t why I ever thought I wouldn’t be a carrier; I was bloody natural at seven years old.” Harry laughed shaking his head.

“You are a natural. Thank you by the way for earlier with Maddie.”

“Of course. You don’t need to thank me for that. She is my soon to be stepdaughter after all. I don’t think Daniel has left a good idea of what a stepparent is supposed to do and its easier spending time with her when we’re in familiar school territory. It’s different here, I guess. More…personal, I keep forgetting she’s still a child, only six. She had to grow up so much around her mother…she’s completely different here than she is there or with her. It’s like she isn’t afraid to express normal attitude and emotion. Like earlier Maddie has never even remotely given attitude to anyone that I’ve seen.”

“The first time she came over she had this huge tantrum, she had behavioral problems so bad, and she just broke everything she could possibly reach and then she cried. At first, I was mad yknow, she broke a tv, she broke mugs, plates, literally everything. But then I thought about it. I remembered what my mom used to tell me that the child acts up the most around a parent they trust. So, I sat down on the couch and I waited. I waited over two hours I think when finally, Maddie came over and started crying. She was three at the time I think, maybe four, I’m not quite sure so at that age she didn’t have all the proper vocabulary to tell me what she was feeling, and she was behind on her development anyway. I just remember holding her as she sniffled herself to sleep and then I got up and I felt like such a failure. My baby was hurting, and I couldn’t do anything to help her because I got a job that took so many hours of my life away and there was no routine or schedule. So, I promised myself that even if Maddie came over and broke everything in the house each and every visit, I would do everything I could to get her over here as often as possible. I started looking for someone to settle down with, it wouldn’t be casual it wouldn’t be testing the road, it would be the long haul. I started with women; I knew my best bet was getting a housewife. A normal life and family. One a judge couldn’t look at and disagree with. Never went past a first date because obviously by then I had explored through drinking and pubs and everything else I much preferred the male body. So, I started dating men and as you know men didn’t want babies in their twenties. They want casual sex and relationships and that was it. I stopped about a year ago, gave up and resigned myself into not getting my daughter at all and quitting my job and finding something else to do. I started looking at jobs and things to do with my degree with better hours. I was very desperate to just find something to help me so I could help my daughter. Then the hospital announced they were opening a bigger pediatric ward with scheduled days and routine weeks. But it wouldn’t be ready for two years. Then Hannah told me about Daniel’s potential promotion, and I knew I didn’t have two years.” Louis knew where it led to, where the desperation of a father wanting to do right by his daughter led. He grinned and leaned over pressing a not at all chaste kiss to Harry’s lips.

“Lucky for you, you found me then huh?” Harry laughed but nodded pulling Louis in for deeper kiss, “I am not having sex with you with our families here.”

“Buzzkill. Come on let’s get to bed. Any later and none of our families is getting cooked breakfast in the morning.” Louis followed Harry upstairs after they turned off the lights and set the alarm, Gizmo and Bear following close behind them only for Bear to enter Maddie’s room and Gizmo to enter Freddie’s. When they entered the bedroom they crawled into bed and cuddled up together falling asleep almost instantly.

[harrytomylou]

You’ll always find your way back home.. - Louis (Includes Harry/Louis)

* I’m posting old fanfictions that I wrote onto this account simply because I want to keep them for myself *

No Trigger Warnings

Sometimes you feel like running, find a whole new life and jump in.

It was obvious really.

The pressure was getting to Louis and even the fans were beginning to notice it now.

‘Do you ever just wish you could go back to before?’ He whispered into Harry’s ear one night while they and Niall were watching Liam and Zayn play Mario cart in the living room area of their tour bus.

‘Do you?’ Harry replied, not willing to let his mouth answer the question himself. They all knew the answer. The entire band wanted to go home. They wanted to see their family and friends and Liam wanted to see his girlfriend. Louis wanted to stop being made to spend every minute of his spare time proving a fake relationship was real and spend time with his boyfriend and family instead and Harry wanted the exact same. They all loved their life. They loved touring and singing and none of them would change it for the world. They were just so stressed and their management wasn’t helping that. They just wanted to be themselves. Be in control of when they went home for a couple of days or when they stayed on tour and be in control of their own lives.

‘Yeah.’ Louis whispered before sighing and laying his head on Harry’s shoulder from his position on the sofa beside him. ‘Sometimes I just look at our fans and think ‘fuck, I wish my life was that easy again.’ You know?’ Louis muttered into his secret boyfriend’s collarbone.

‘Yeah.’ Harry whispered in agreement.

‘No hassle. No management. No hiding who they are. Nothing. They can be whoever they want to be. We have to be what management thinks will get them more money. I hate it, Haz.’

‘I know, Lou.’ Harry muttered back, sympathetically.

‘And the majority of our fans either live with their families or see them every other fucking day. I’m so homesick, Harry. Sometimes, I just want to run. Run away from everything.’

‘I know, baby. I know.’ Harry muttered as he turned his head and pressed a soft kiss to his fragile boyfriends head. ‘Everything will be okay. I promise.’ He whispered before taking Louis’ chin in his hand and pulling his head up slightly to connect their forbidden lips.

Your best friends, your little hometown, are waiting up where ever you go now; you know that you can always turn around.

Louis Tomlinson > Stanley Lucas

10:06am - Hey mate.

10:08am - Hey! How are you?

10:10am - Stressed, bored and ill. You?

10:14am - M’alright. Why you stressed?

10:17am - Touring and shit. The stress is making me feel ill… I just want to come home.

10:19am - It’ll be over soon, mate. Do you know when you’re next off?

10:23am - I hope so. I really miss everyone. We have a day off in about a week but we’re not allowed back to England for another 3 months! Manager says we’re too busy.

10:26am - That’s shit! We all miss you too, Lou. We’re all waiting up for you to come back!

10:30am - I’m waiting up to come back, man!

10:31am - It’ll fly by, mate.

10:32am - I really hope so.

10:34am - Miss you.

10:47am - Miss you too. Got to get back to rehearsals. Call me later?

10:50am - Course, Lou.

11:09am - Love you, Stan.

11:11am - Love you too man!

Louis Tomlinson > Jay Tomlinson

6:01pm - Louis, Stan came round earlier and told me about what you were texting about. If touring is too much for you right now, come home xx

6:44pm - I can’t. You know that xx

6:45pm - You can do whatever you need to. It’s your life and you’re my son. If you need to come home, you will xx

6:47pm - I’m okay, mum. Honest. I was just kind of letting everything out with Stan. I’m alright xx

6:49pm - No you’re not. I know you better than that, Lou. At least tell them you need a short break xx

6:50pm - I have. It’s not changed their minds. Money is more important to them.. xx

6:51pm - Just leave then? Xx

6:54pm - I can’t let everyone down like that xx

6:56pm - Oh, Louis.. Well, if you change your mind just call me. You’ll always be welcome here baby. It’s your home! Xx

6:58pm - I love you xx

7:00pm - Love you too, honey. Is Harry taking care of you? Xx

7:02pm - Yes mum :’). Go to go, concert. Talk to you later xx

7:04pm - Okay, baby. The girls and I love and miss you xx

7:05pm - Love and miss you all too.. So much xx

7:07pm - Have a good concert, boo. Remember you can always come home if you need too xx

When I’m feeling down and I’m all alone, I’ve always got a place where I can go.

‘Louis? You alright?’ Louis’ 13 year old sister answered the phone quickly.

‘Not really.’ Louis muttered as a reply. He had been wanting to call Lottie for hours but had held on to make sure she had returned home from school and was able to answer without getting in trouble. He had always been close to his younger sister. They spoke about everything and anything, their 7 year age gap not mattering to them one bit. Louis could trust Lottie with everything and she and Harry were often the only ones who could honestly cheer him up.

‘What’s up, bro? Isn’t it, like, midnight where you are?’

‘It’s 4 in the morning.’ Louis replied quietly.

‘Okay, now I know it’s something big.’ She stated. Louis stayed silent, a small smile already grazing his lips. ‘What’s wrong?’

‘I’m just’ Louis paused, suddenly feeling stupid for calling her about something so insignificant while he should be sleeping and she would most probably rather be out with her friends.

‘You’re just what, Lou?’ She asked, worried.

‘It doesn’t matter.’

‘Louis, if you’re calling me at 4 in the morning, it’s got to matter.’ Lottie stated, suddenly sounding way more mature than a girl should be at her age. Louis laughed gently into the receiver. ‘Tell me?’ She asked, tone softening.

‘I just miss you.’ He whispered, blushing and burying his head into his tear soaked pillow even though she couldn’t see him. There was silence for a couple of seconds before the young girl spoke.

‘Oh, Lou.’ She whispered gently. She knew just how much it affected Louis, being away from home, her, their sisters and their mum so much.

‘I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have called you.’ He mumbled embarrassed as he heard one of the other boys choke out a shut up from their bunk. ‘Fuck off.’ He called slightly louder to whoever it was. Lottie figured it wasn’t directed to her so she ignored it.

‘It’s alright, Lou. You can call me if you want to, you know that. I don’t care.’ She murmured down the phone, attempting to comfort her older brother. The one who was usually so strong and comforting her. Louis hummed in reply.

‘It’ll be over soon, Louis. You’ll be home before you know it.’

‘I hope so.’ He whispered, tears escaping his eyes again. Lottie sensed it.

‘Don’t cry, Louis. Not again. It’s okay.’ She whispered back.

‘How do you know I’ve been crying?’ He whispered, voice cracking in sympathy half way through his sentence.

‘I’m your sister. I know you.’ She laughed gently. He laughed too. ‘Where’s Harry?’

‘Asleep. I don’t want to wake him. He was so tired.’ Louis replied, wiping the stay tears away from his cheeks before burying his head back into the, now wet, pillow of the tiny single bunk bed.

‘Fair enough. Do you want to talk about it? Or do you want me to distract you?’

‘Distract me please, Lottie?’ He muttered vulnerably.

‘Of course. What time do you have to be up?’

‘6.’ He whispered.

‘Shit.’ She replied under her breath.

‘Yeah.’ He agreed.

‘Do you want to even bother trying to sleep or do you just want to talk for the next 2 hours?’

‘Talk.’ He spoke, blinking back the tears that were threatening to fall again. ‘Lottie, I’m so homesick. I hate it. I just want to’ He paused, unaware or what he was even trying to say. ‘I don’t even know.’ He whispered.

‘I know, Lou. Only a little while now though. You can do it.’ She replied softly. Louis hummed, unsure. Lottie stayed silent, eyes searching around her suddenly empty room for something to talk about to distract her broken older brother. Louis was such a role model for her. She hated seeing (or hearing in this case) him hurting. It hurt her. Louis was always the strong one. The life of the party. To see management take away his freedom to the extent where his main personality traits left him was heart breaking for the new teen. Her eyes landed on a letter sticking out of the top of her school bag and she smiled gently.

‘I’m going to Thorpe Park in 2 weeks.’ She stated excitement evident in her voice. Louis smiled, hearing it.

‘With school?’ He asked. Lottie grinned even more as she heard the smile on Louis’ lips.

‘Yeah.’ She replied, thankful she had managed to cheer her personal idol up slightly, even if it was only temporary.

Where they know exactly who you are, where the real you is a superstar, you know it’s never too far away.

Louis sighed slightly as he felt Harry tighten his grip on the older boy. They were currently lying on the double bed of one of the many hotel rooms they stayed in at just gone 5 in the afternoon. They surprisingly only had a couple of interviews that day and had gotten back to their hotel room at about 4 o clock. Harry and Louis had left the other boys playing Xbox in Liam’s room and come back to their own to collapse on top of their beds in each other’s arms at about half  4. They had fallen into a pointless conversation easily which had died down by now and had been replaced with thoughts.

Louis was currently thinking about Doncaster.

He felt safe there. It was his home. The same sort of safe he felt with Harry. Despite being almost 3 years younger, the green eyed boy seemed to have that effect on Louis instantly. Louis had just felt a vibe from Harry. He was safety. Harry knew Louis like the palm of his hand. The same way pretty much everyone in his home town did.

Back home there was no secrets with Louis. Everyone knew he was gay. Everyone knew he was with Harry. That’s why he loved it. They knew and loved him for exactly who he was. He didn’t have to hide anything. They loved him for him. Louis from Doncaster. Not Louis Tomlinson from One Direction. And sometimes that was one of the most comforting thoughts. They cared. They weren’t pretending. They weren’t lying. They weren’t fake. They cared. He was loved back home. He was missed.

But you know what? With Harry around to help, for Louis home was never that far away anyway.

You can learn to fly and you can chase your dreams, you can laugh and cry but everybody knows, you’ll always find your way back home.

'Oh my god.’ Louis heard a small voice mutter from the doorway of the kitchen in which he was currently stood making a cup of tea. He grinned happily before abandoning what he was doing and turning around to face the younger girl stood behind him.

‘Hey Lottie.’

‘Oh my god.’ She repeated slightly louder, eyes fixed on Louis’ as a wide smile spread on her face.

‘What?’ They heard Jay shout from the hallway.

‘Hi mum.’ Louis yelled through the house, grinning even more when he heard his mother’s shocked gasp.  

‘Lou.’ He heard his little sister whisper as she practically ran into his arms. He let out a small laugh as he hugged back tightly.

‘Louis!’ He heard two younger girls exclaim as he pulled away from Lottie.

‘Dais! Phoeb!’ He opened his arms and crouched down as his two 8 year old sisters ran towards him wrapping their arms around his neck and clinging to it. He distantly heard Lottie laugh gently.

‘I thought you weren’t coming home for, like, another week? I thought you were coming with Harry?’ Felicite asked joyfully as she hugged her older brother tightly, seconds after the two girls had let go. Louis laughed again.

‘We got bored in London and missed home too much so we decided to stand up to management. Harry’s gone back to Cheshire for a week and I’ve come here.’ He replied as he walked over to his mum, the last of the five to walk through the kitchen door, pulling her into a tight hug as well as she dropped the bags in her hand carelessly onto the floor. He and Harry were supposed to drive down to Doncaster exactly a week later to join both his immediate family and Harry’s, who were staying in a hotel for a week so they could be with the two boys, Jay and the girls.

Carefully wiping away the small happy tear that had escaped his eye, he pulled back seconds later just enough to allow both he and his mum to pull all 4 of his younger siblings in to join them in a group hug.

He had missed this. He had missed them. He loved his life. He loved everything about it. The singing. The foreign countries. The screams. The band. His boyfriend. It was all a part of his dream. He’d got there. They’d done it. But right now, his family were taking over that. His sisters and his mum. His world. His happiness. He loved them more than he ever would the fortune and fame.

And as much as he loved Harry, Doncaster and his family were his true home.

You’ll always find your way back home..

[wwestrang-fan]

Something different pt 1

jey uso x oc reader

Summary :After Jey's divorce, he found himself overwhelmed by the support of family and friends who were determined to help him move on. They became a relentless support squad, arranging blind dates and social outings, believing that a little push would lift his spirits. However, Jey craved solitude to process his emotions. One night, despite his reluctance, his friends insisted he join them at a new restaurant, where he unexpectedly encountered someone who wasn't his usual type completely different from the partners he typically sought

warning : a little bit of angst insecurity bit of a age gap scars

author's note : this is my first time writing so let me know what you guys think

Jey was waiting for his friend sami zayn by the exit of the arena ready to go back to the hotel

"Hey Jay, you good to go?" Sami called out as he walked up to me. "I've been ready," Jay said, making his way to the parking lot. "Yo, me and the guys are going out tonight. You coming?" Sami asked as he jumped into the driver’s seat. "Nah, I think I’ll just chill at the hotel and call it a night," Jay answered as I hopped in the car. "Come on, dude. You haven't hung out with us since the divorce. You’re always working! You should hang out with us more," Sami said. "I just wanna be by myself right now, man," Jay replied. Sam just sighed and started driving.

Jay and Sami arrived at the hotel, Jay headed to the front desk to grab my room key. "Here’s your room key, sir," the receptionist said, handing it over. "Thanks," Jay replied, making his way to the elevator. "You really don’t want to come out with us?" Sami asked. "Yeah, I’m sure," Jay told him. "Come on, man, your brothers want to see you. They're worried," Sami insisted. Jay sighed and stepped out of the elevator, walking toward our room. "I told you, I just want to be alone," Jay said. With another sigh, they continued down the hallway to our room.

As soon as Jey walked into the room, he lay down on the bed, sinking into the comfortable mattress as the exhaustion of the day washed over him. Just then, a knock echoed on the door, prompting Sami to walk over and open it. Standing there was jimmy

"What's up, uso?" Jimmy said, walking in with an easy smile.

What up man you good Sami asked

"I'm good. Y'all coming out tonight?" Jimmy asked, his enthusiasm palpable.

"Yeah, I'm coming," Sami replied, a grin spreading across his face. "You coming, Jey?"

"Come on, uso," Jimmy urged, his tone persuasive.

"Yeah, come on! Don't make us beg," Sami added playfully.

Jay let out a sigh, finally giving in. “Alright, alright, I’ll come.”

“Great!” Sami replied, grinning. “Everyone’s down in the lobby waiting for us.”

“Okay, let me change real quick; I’ll be there in a minute,” Jey called after them.

“Okay!” Sami and Jimmy echoed in unison, their voices trailing off as they walked out of the room, their footsteps echoing down the hallway.

As the door clicked shut, Jey swung his legs out of bed and planted his feet on the cool floor. He pushed himself up and shuffled toward the bathroom, determined to get ready quickly.

Jey walked out of the elevator and into the bustling lobby. He spotted Sami, Jimmy, Naomi, Cody, Seth, Roman, and Solo all gathered together, animatedly chatting and laughing.

“There he is!” Cody called out, his wide grin.

“Hey, man,” Jey replied, stepping forward to give Cody a fist bump.

“How you been, man?” Seth asked.

“I’m good, thanks,” Jey replied.

“Glad you guys decided to come with us.”Naomi teased.

Jey rolled his eyes playfully and responded, “Yeah, yeah, I know." Where are we going.

“We’re going to Korean BBQ! Damian and Rhea found this amazing place,” it’s supposed to be the best in town. Roman said.

Jey felt his stomach rumble at the thought of sizzling meat and savory flavors. “Sounds great! Let’s go, then!”

With a renewed sense of anticipation, the group made their way towards the exit, laughter and chatter filling the air as they headed out for an evening of good food and great company.

Everyone arrived at the restaurant and spotted Damian and Rhea in a booth. They walked over to join them.

“Hey, glad you guys made it!” Damian said, scooting down to make room.

“Yeah, especially you, Jey,” Rhea added teasing him. “Me and Jimmy almost had to beg him to come,” Sami said, causing everyone to chuckle.

Jey playfully rolled his eyes. “I’m here, aren’t I?” he said.

“Hello! I’ll be your server today. Do you guys want to start off with drinks?” the waiter asked.

“Yeah, um, I’ll have sweet tea,” Damian said.

“I’ll have sweet tea too, but with a lemon,” Solo added.

“I’ll take a Sprite,” Rhea said.

“I’ll have lemonade,” Jimmy chimed in.

“Me too,” Jey agreed.

“I’ll just have water,” Sami said.

“I’ll have the same,” Naomi replied.

“I’ll also take a Coca-Cola,” Seth said.

“I'll have one as well,” Roman added.

“Okay, I’ll be back with your drinks,” the waiter said, tucking his pad into his pocket and walie away.

Sami looked at the menu and asked, “What’s everyone in the mood for?” Damian chimed in, “How about we go for chicken, beef, some rice, and ramen?” Naomi nodded, “That sounds great!” Everyone agreed. Just then, the waiter brought over their drinks and asked, “Here are your drinks. Are you guys ready to order?” Damian replied, “Yep, we’ll take chicken, beef, rice, ramen, and veggies.” The waiter nodded writing down on the pad and headed back.

While everyone was chatting to kill time, Jey zoned out and started looking around the restaurant. His gaze landed on someone who really caught his eye— a stunning person with snow-white skin and Native American roots. They seemed a bit mixed, and Jey couldn't figure out if they were a guy or a girl, but one thing was for sure they were absolutely gorgeous.

"Hey, Jey, you okay?" Sami asked, noticing his distant expression.

“Um, yeah, I’m fine,” Jey replied, snapping back to reality.

“What are you looking at?” Jimmy questioned, scanning the room to figure out where Jey's gaze had landed.

“Nothing, I was just thinking,” Jey said. Just then, the waiter returned, saying, “Here’s your guys food,” as he placed the dishes in front of them and turned on the grill.

“Thanks you” everyone said in unison, and they all started to dig into their meals.

Jey still couldn’t keep his eyes off the person in the restaurant. He noticed they were wearing a baggy anime T-shirt paired with loose cargo pants adorned with chains. For some reason, their calm demeanor captivated him, drawing him in even further.

“Jey!” Rhea called, breaking his trance.

“Huh?” Jey responded, blinking as he snapped back to reality.

“You’re going to burn the food,” Sami remarked, glancing at the grill, which was starting to sizzle dangerously.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Jimmy added, studying Jey’s distracted expression with concern.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” Jey assured them, taking the food off the grill, though his mind still lingered on the intriguing figure across the room. He glanced back just in time to see the person getting up from their table and walking out of the restaurant.

A sudden wave of urgency washed over him as he wanted to move, but his body felt frozen. By the time he registered what was happening, the person was gone.

“Hey Jey, there’s a friend of Jade’s that lives in New York I think you’d like,” Naomi said, breaking the silence.

Jey sighed, “I told you not to set me up on dates. I don’t want to go.”

“Come on, Jey! You can’t just keep moping around,” Jimmy urged, leaning forward.

“They're right,” Roman chimed in.

“If you go on this one, I promise not to set you up again.”. Naomi said

“Fine,” Jey relented, returning to his food but still lost in thought about that captivating person. As he picked at his dinner, he couldn’t shake the image of them from his mind, wondering if he’d ever see them again. The laughter and warmth of his friends faded into the background as he replayed that brief moment over and over.

[mindthebulletso]

What?! No I'm not !! the only side I am in is that of my way of seeing the world, my conscience, my cynical character and experience. Because I am very selective and I have chosen people to follow. I don’t follow you because you are a Louie but because I consider you a smart girl, so seeing how easily many have fallen into this, imo, manipulation hurts me. For Louis above all else. Because I remember being one of the first in 2018 to speak openly about Sony Sabotage in HS2 favor and I perfectly remember what and how it was answered to me!!

Because I remember Why I looked for the Rads ....and how the world has turned upside down 🤣 Having moved away from Styles for other reasons, having taken a different approach before this perhaps affects my thoughts and reasonings but how can you not understand that you are doing exactly what Sony wants (regardless which Label we will discover has louis now) years of Larries VS Anties hasn't really opened your eyes? How is it possible? Have you ever noticed how many Louies (not larries) always write "team" and never "Sony" Have you ever noticed how full their accounts are with everything Harry does / doesn't do in real time? Twenty-five years of Kardashian (Hello Uncle Irving) did not help to understand StarSistem is based on chatter and not only on good things? They often update before Larries! if you want to know what happens in Harry Styles life follow a Louie. nice no? If you watch MV to "see how shabby it is" and then talk about it on social, however, you contribute to creating curiosity, chatter, comments, quarrels. If you always complain using Harry as a yardstick, you keep Louis in this funnel that L is crushed in one way or another. If you look back and you don't see how much 2015!Louis was tired and only blame Xander for that , thinking that he was happy for singing a bit more because Zayn was gone or for the water fights with Liam it is you who considers him half of a ship!! If you confuse his nostalgia and humility for lack of ambition or trust , you consider him half of a ship. If you love Louis and have decided that Harry is an active part of his sabotage why don't you get to completely ignore him, always, in the most absolute way after having clarified your position? And if you have decided this, how can you accept Niall and Liam, whom you consider his brothers do not take sides with him but rather, as soon as they can, they raise Star!Styles? Have you ever thought about how he can feel seeing that his fandom, while insulting Styles' new life, spends days asking for OneDirection!Louis? And the braces, and the hair, and the beanie, the headband, and the tank top .. he had to admit this is frustrating but nevertheless Louies continue and if you point it out the answer is "Old!Louis receives more likes " 😒

anyway let's go.. “Because I loved Styles anyway and I have a past with him” Ok. Let's start from here then. Azoff and Sony in 2013 begin to seriously plan H solo career. Azoff has a story, a very clear story, but you voluntarily ignored it at that time, only to blame Styles for choosing them (being chosen) now!! Like three silly kids Louis Niall and Liam until 2016 believe in an 18-month hiatus 😂 . Do you really think they are so naive? Seriously? Louis William Tomlinson who at 20 sees a hole in the writing process of the band and turns everything upside down does not understand what is the destiny designated? Among other things, the same for all boyband before 1D and info easily accessible on google But “he was in love "ok. But then you have to admit you start from the starting point that you now strongly reproach Larries. You have to admit you are living in Young & Beautiful Spin Off because instead I see a strong, smart, brilliant man, who for 10 years has been fighting tirelessly for his individuality. I think this passive Louis is the result of the FF you read because you are the first who make everything go around Styles, even before Sony. Someone stuffing your head saying Harry doesn't need Larries anymore. Are you Sure? Because business is brutal and Labels don't exist for your enjoy. They don't invest in you leaving you power. It is quite the opposite. The more you make money, the more you are a puppet. Just check the difference in numbers between H and Justin, Ariana, Selena, Ed, DuaLipa to understand what I mean!

the Direction taken is the right one, it is having a good success - well deserved - but, believe me, not enough to justify the investment made. And do you really think Azoff, manager since the barter still existed, evaluates the point of view of a 25-year-old who even made almost deny the first album? Who no longer took his mommy on holiday when Harries started complaining about her presence? Do you really think these guys signed contracts to their advantage (I'm not talking about money of course)? Do you really think Styles can say in Sony -I don't do this-? Based on what? Do you blame Harry for his ambition but do you really think he has alternatives? Especially in Sony that has no other icons of this generation? Someone make you believe Harry is loved by everyone but have you ever come out of the fandom bubble to read what so many locals write about him? don't you read how much hate he receives? Azoff arrives in 2013, from that moment on did you see his life change for the better? Less work, more attention to his health or did you see him arrive at the end of 2015 without voice? or do you think "better life" is going out with Taylor Swift and Kaya Gerber Because in that case you love the life Louis says he hates 😟 And considering the type of music he produced, do you think his 2021worldtour is to safeguard his voice and health? Really!? And how is it possible if Azoff loves Harry person and not Harry MoneyMachine? Do you really think Harry is so naive that he doesn't know this? Do you often notice how bad it is aging, How dull are his eyes.. Isn't this already an answer? And if you want to say "that's what he deserves" wow do you remember that you don't really know them and that they are only singers / strangers you love? They are not really your son? that you've never been to their room and their songs aren't a gossip magazine?

Same talk about Louis Fam. Louis Tomlinson openly lashes out against Euphoria chatting with his HetStalkerNumberOne creating more promo or against Zayn when he drops GY but is unable to tell his stepfather / sisters to stop using his life like that? Really? Or do you think he did this but Mark ignored that ? Everyone uses him but he, passively again, cannot do anything. Do you really think Louis is this? Why? Look Louies focused on commenting What Harry is doing in istagram? Look how much power they are giving this stupid thing? They put Harry at the center of Louis' life, they considered him Mrs L. Styles weak and closed in the suitcase with the only ambition to jump on his cock. why this daily need to highlight how disappointed you are with the person who has become? Are you more concerned that Harry cheated on Louis or that Harry cheated on you? Because if you think Louis has a new life why you don't go on too? The position is clear, why keep playing the Sony game? How do you think Louis feels when he sees his fandom has absorbed that his pubblic life has been closely linked to his girlfriend for years now? When you read that H's lunch with stringer was cruel and nobody mentions anymore three days later he was paps with El and the dogs? Just because The Sun canceled? What does it matter he had to undergo this, he had to get out of bed, go out and go to the pap (in 2020 only if you are 12 you can think that the paps are not scheduled) You can also think that there is a friendly relationship with E but why you accept that she is also present when a month later they go to GoKart? Why can't only Louis spend The first Christmas without Fizzy and Jay with his sisters? Why can't Louis alone participate in the B.L.M. march? We told ourselves that the cause was more important than the company and it is true. But important for whom? For us or for him that of B.L.M. did speak before everyone when it wasn't “trendy” ? Why doesn't even his fandom fight for his freedom? from everyone?! Why Do you think this imposition is healthy for him? Or do you think he chose this, because if you think this then all JLYMV was a joke for you and it's okay but I ask you, do you really believe that it is no longer hard for him suffer the presence of Eleanor than a Harry Styles SmileyNails ? Are we talking about what's harder for him or for you? Does Louis individual really care about anyone? Because my heart breaks to see how, even if it were reality, his pubblic life is linked to this girl as if she were the star! Everyone has a girlfriend but not even Kilye Jenner was so present in Travis Scott's career, private life. Why don't you rebel against this? Why "thank you Eleonor" ? Why is your selfishness more important than he has to live this actively? Why do you think it is easy for him after 10 years? Whatever your opinion about , Louis has not interacted publicly with Freddy since 2018. Why don't you get angry with Louies who do not care about this and clog social with his pics not respecting Louis' will? Why do you only get angry with a certain part of fandom and not with those who help a small group of people to spread this child's face wildly despite Louis not doing it? Why don't you ask yourself "louis does not do this, it is the case that I do it"? Who is your Louis landmark or the baby's family? Why is Louis never enough? Why don't you see Louis' individual freedom is not seized by Harry Styles but by Sony which is who should protect him from Azoff / Styles? If your answer is "Sony does not believe in him enough" I'm sorry I have news for you, you believe Louis tomlinson is not worth enough .. and while you continue this useless fight between Louies Larries Labels will continue to use Harry, Louis for their bank accounts and only for that laughing at us whatever the real personal situation between the two of which I honestly care zero but, as you can see, in one way or another it is still at the center of our attention and if Larries have the justification "I believe in them" what excuse do you have?

[alarriefantasy]

                                 Halloween Fic Rec 2019

Demon

Trade Mistakes by ifancylou, Taayjaay

Words: 3k

Harry summons a crossroads demon without realizing that he'd be giving up his soul in exchange for the deal. He offers the demon something a little different instead.

Demons by CarlyLovesLarry

Words: 4k

or where Harry is a demon and Louis is a hunter, and Harry fuck Louis into oblivion  

Sealed With A Kiss by ty_madison

Words: 6k

Harry has been having dreams about a boy, every night since he turned sixteen and everytime he has opened his eyes in the past the boy has disappeared. But now he is awake, the boy is here and he has a deal to make with the innocent Harry.

Paper Planes by cathedralhearts

Words: 7k

Louis sold his soul to the Devil when he was sixteen, tear-stained and miserable, grief wracking his body as the doctors told him his mother had days to live. Lucifer prefers to go by the name Harry, wears Louis’ soul around his neck as a pendant, and spends the next five years following him around.

Shadow Holding Me Hostage by scribblewrite

Words: 26k

Harry's a demon, basically the king of hell and the source of all evil, and he needs an heir. Louis's a normal human, unsuspecting of what's in store for him.

The Devil's Angel by lilacsweaters_ivorylilies

Words: 86k

Ezekiel 28:13 - For Lucifer has been in Eden the garden of God; every precious stone was his covering, the sardius, topaz, and the diamond, the beryl, the onyx, and the jasper, the sapphire, the emerald, and the carbuncle, and gold: the workmanship of his tabrets and of his pipes was prepared in him in the day that he was created. 

Fantasy/Supernatural

got me losing every breath (i'm latching onto you) by kissingiscool

Words: 14k

(or an au where louis is a fairy with a fear of thunderstorms and a talent of knitting and harry is a vet with three cats and a lot of love.)

A Love So True You Don't Have To Be Afraid by homosociallyyours

Words: 14k

In a world long ago but not so far away, where true love is valued above all else, Louis and Harry have already found one another. Their lives are shaken by the arrival of Simon, whose heart is more than a bit shit, and who longs to sow unhappiness.

When Louis is changed into a dragon and Harry is the knight meant to vanquish him, it would appear that Simon has succeeded. But love wins, every time.

Waiting For Someone Who Needs Me by graceling_in_a_suit

Words: 17k

AU: Harry is a genie, and Louis doesn't think he needs anything.

The Prince Of Light by jacaranda_bloom

Words: 35k

Louis was found abandoned at a hospital at six months old and adopted by an older couple who raised him. Now twenty, he studies by night and by day works as a live-in au pair for a family with three little girls. One of the girls, Holly, swears there is a Garden Fairy coming and eating treats she leaves out in the cubby house each night.

When the family goes away for a two week holiday, Louis is secretly tasked with feeding the Fairy. While laying out the food one night he falls from the cubby house and is found by Harry. Harry is different and Louis is fascinated. But as Louis learns how different Harry really is, he discovers his own true home and a very surprising past he never knew.

Cue badgers, bananas and cookies, soulmates, a whole other world, and a future he’d never imagined.

like cabbages and kings by you_explode

Words: 60k

When Louis was a kid, he had a series of very vivid dreams about a place called Wonderland. There were rabbits wearing waistcoats and talking cats and ridiculous tea parties, and amidst all the absurdity, there was a boy. A boy with dimples, big green eyes and the sweetest soul Louis has ever known. Louis has always kept a place in his heart for that boy and for his funny dreamworld, and when he’s twenty-five and his life falls apart, it turns out Wonderland might not be so imaginary after all.

there's no fair in farewell by we_are_the_same

Words: 218k

When Harry and Louis, two Cupids who have been bringing people together for decades, are tasked with making Soulmates Liam and Zayn fall in love, it proves to be much harder than expected. But maybe, just maybe, that isn’t such a bad thing after all.

Ghost

The Haunting of Louis Tomlinson by HelloAmHere

Words: 31k

OR: Louis is a plucky Gothic Heroine, Harry is a Mournful Spirit, and Big Country Houses are full of mystery and suspense, as Big Country Houses ever are!

Close to Nowhere by angelichl

Words: 34k

Louis and Harry are psychics who kind of hate each other. They go to Tennessee to investigate a haunting.

you look so good in blue by patdkitten

Words: 20k

Or: Harry Styles hears about a perfect flat from his roommate Zayn's boyfriends and decides to sign the lease. The only problem is: the flat has a reputation for being haunted. It certainly doesn't help that Harry's cat is seeing things as soon as they move in...

The Case Of The (Definitely Not Haunted) Styles Mansion by BriaMaria

Words: 40k

Or the Nancy Drew AU where Marcel is a man of logic, Louis is a private detective who believes in ghosts, and the Styles Mansion is definitely, absolutely, positively *not* haunted.

Tied to Fate by littlelouishiccups

Words: 52k

After his estranged father’s death, Harry inherits a castle in England that has belonged to his family for generations and he knows nothing about. When he breaks up with his boyfriend, Harry decides England is the perfect place for a small vacation. He isn’t prepared to meet Louis Tomlinson, a ghost who once lived in the castle and has haunted it for over five hundred years. He’s even more unprepared to fall in love with him.

Through Eerie Chaos by MediaWhore

Words: 102k

The Ghost Hunter AU where Niall lives to prove ghosts are real, Zayn is a skeptical librarian and Harry gets caught up in a century-old mystery and catches feeling in the process

Halloween Themed

Trick-or-Treat (Cheer Up) by writingstylinson 

Words: 2k

Louis Tomlinson is the single father of a little girl named Finnley, and they’ve been living in Holmes Chapel for a year. This Halloween is the first one they will be celebrating without Louis’ younger siblings or his own mother. It’s because of this that his daughter, who is usually outgoing and fearless, starts to have some worries about going trick-or-treating alone with her father.

Then Louis comes up with the perfect solution.

This is Halloween, everybody make a scene by allwaswell16

Words: 2k

When Louis takes his son trick-or-treating in a stormtrooper costume, little does he know by the end of the night he will end up gaining a Luke Skywalker, a Chewbacca, and a Rey. He doesn't mind the additions, and if Rey's very hot dad wants to come along as well, he doesn't mind that too much either.

this kitten's got your tongue tied in knots by ballsdeepinjesus

Words: 3k

[it's halloween, harry is a kitten in a tree and louis is a (fake) firefighter.]

A gold and green Halloween by Tita

Words: 8k

Harry and Louis are strangers who, dressed as Drarry, compete on a Halloween couple's costume contest. It's exactly as much of a mess as it sounds.

Black Cats Steal Hearts, Not Souls by SLD24

Words: 9k

Harry finds a kitten in a pumpkin patch the day before Halloween but it turns out not to be a kitten at all.

Horror

All The Songs That You Sing In The Dark by pukeandcry

Words: 10k

What happened was that first people got sick.

What happened after that was that they died.

But the worst thing was what happened after that. After they died, they came back.

The Skeleton Key by photo41

Words: 18k

Harry Styles, a good-natured nurse living in Manchester, quits his job at a hospice to work for Violet Winston, an elderly woman whose husband, Ben, is in poor health following a stroke.

When Harry begins to explore the couple's rundown mansion, he discovers strange artifacts and learns the house has a mysterious past. As he continues to investigate, he realizes that Violet is keeping a sinister secret about the cause of Ben's illness- and tries to convince the Winston's estate lawyer, Louis Tomlinson, that he really isn't going insane.

Loosely based off the movie of the same name.

Insane by prideinlou

Words: 20k

Or in which Louis Tomlinson and Harry Styles are two dim-witted, drunk teenage boys that take a Halloween night dare too far, and end up in a life or death situation in the clutches of a haunted mental asylum.

Will they make it out alive... or will they go insane?

Mermaid

seaside improvisation by tinyweirdloves

Words: 6k

[harry is a mermaid who has lost his tail and he lives in louis's bathtub for a month.]

at least as deep as the pacific ocean (i wanna be yours) by writtensoul 

Words: 9k

louis is the very entitled prince of the seven seas!! harry is a goofy sailor boy!!! a lot of hijinks ensue involving slippery mermaid tails and happy fun little sea creatures!!

Define Dancing by asphodelknox 

Words: 20k

Death has a way of making certain things crystal clear. After Jay’s death, Louis returns to the summer cottage he always considered home. Unbeknownst to him, he’s also returning to the merman who has been his best friend through everything and finds that maybe there’s a chance for more.

Don't Let the Tide Come and Take Me by kiwikero

Words: 28k

Or, the one where Louis decides to set a merman free and ends up finding his own freedom along the way.

Still Deep In Us by graceling_in_a_suit

Words: 41k

AU. The village Harry has called home his entire life sits on six shaky legs, held aloft from the ocean which claimed the entire world twenty years ago. Harry's just a grieving tinkerer trying to do his best, and Louis is a mermaid that ruins The Village's delicate balance of power (and perhaps, just maybe, wins the heart of a boy).

Pirates

Captain Harry Styles... And The Faerie by spaceboyharry

Words: 8k

“You have today been defeated. Remember this forever as the day you were bested by Captain Harry Styles.” Louis zoomed past, shouting “AND THE FAERIE!” I sighed, rolling my eyes. “And the bloody faerie.”

must be something in the water by hattalove

Words: 3k

They all remember, somewhere deep down, why they gave up everything they had for the Mermaid.

The last vestiges of kindness and bravery and everything that is good in the world are on board that ship. Louis’s heart is on it, moored by some nameless jetty.

In Your Black Heart (Is Where You'll Find Me) by graceling_in_a_suit

Words: 35k

Louis Tomlinson has been lying for five years. His crew sees him as a pirate, a Captain, and an alpha; only two of those are the truth. He was content to let the illusion go on forever, but an omega named Harry Styles just had to join his crew and get his warm-vanilla stink all over Louis' best laid plans.Or: the story of The Captain and The Carpenter.

Si Pudiera Volar by messofgorgeouschaos

Words: 68k

When Harry’s fiancé leaves him for his cousin, he looks the other way for the sake of his happiness. He’ll do anything to forget about him, including joining a monastery. It isn’t until his cousin’s former lover, a pirate, appears that he realizes everything is not as it appears, and an honest pirate might be the only person worthy of his heart.

Or, a fic loosely based on Corazon Salvaje.

Vampire

Call Me the End of Your World by captainsftlouis

Words: 3k

or, the vampire AU where Louis is addicted to vampire venom, and Harry is addicted to Louis.

Waiting On You: A Christmas Drabble by emma1234

Words: 5k

On their first Christmas Eve as a couple, Louis and Harry decide it would be a great idea to exchange one special gift with one another to mark a new tradition. Of course, things never go as smoothly as they planned.

I Wanna Do Bad Things With You by lesbianphrodite

Words: 7k

Harry goes to his favorite pub with the intention to drink and feel bad for himself after a terrible break-up. Instead, he ends up hitting it off with a handsome vampire.

Forever And Always by jacaranda_bloom 

Words: 25k

OR the one where Harry’s neighbour is a crotchety old witch who hates vampires, Niall is the unsuspecting human who ends up inhabiting Harry’s body, and Louis is the caseworker who is assigned to swap them back. How it ends up a love story is anyone’s guess.

we should open up (before it's all too much) by disgruntledkittenface

Words: 43k

Struggling with grieving and depression since his dad died, Harry has never felt so alone. It’s too much to cope with on his own, but he feels like a burden when he tries to open up with people.

Then he meets Louis.

For You I'd Bleed Myself Dry by amomentoflove

Words: 49k

Harry is cold. His bones ache. Every movement draws a whimper from his cracked lips. The stone underneath him is practically like ice. He’s numb, but can clearly feel the sharp pains on his neck every timeHe visits him. Below the icy cold, the achy bones, and the pain on his neck, Harry Styles is pissed. There’s a fire burning in his mind and the anger for the man who keeps him imprisoned is the fuel. He despises him, the man who feeds from him and is a daily reminder that Harry’s suffering won’t end. The man who keeps Harry so weak that he can barely move most days. Harry’s waiting for the day when his owner will go too far and finally kill him. Death must be better than this cold hell he is in.

It won’t happen, though. He has a way of keeping Harry’s heart beating. So for now, all Harry can do is wait for death to come.

He’s been waiting for years.

Witches

what's inside your imagination (is as real as anything else) by suspendrs

Words: 3k

Or, Harry's a witch who likes to pretend he's a human pretending he's a witch, and Louis's the human in a not-so-clever costume that keeps catching his eye.

A Kind Of Magic by mellagreens

Words: 12k

Louis feels the urge to tell Harry he's in love with him.

Spellbound by lovelarry10

Words: 22k

Louis’ a shifter. Harry’s a witch. The only problem is, they’re hiding those things from each other.Will they be able to keep their secrets hidden at the most spooky time of year?

Call It True by abrighteryellow

Words: 48k

With dreams of being a successful novelist, Harry’s been working so hard that he almost doesn’t notice the smoothie shop that just opened down the street. But he can’t miss the mysterious, irresistible boy who works there, nor the strange but entirely positive effect his drinks seem to have. Harry needs to know what’s going on and he wants to get close to Louis, though not necessarily in that order.

A Spell and A Spark by dinosaursmate

Words: 73k

Louis is a teenage witch, living and attending university among mortals. He has to keep his secret whilst studying on both his degree and his witch's licence. His friends don't suspect a thing, even as spell after spell goes awry.

Our Place By The Moon by PearlyDewdrops

Words: 108k/WIP

Or: a late 90's urban fantasy AU in which Louis wants to befriend the strange boy next door, Harry is just trying to keep his family together, and falling in love is most inconvenient for a witch that may have accidentally reignited a centuries old curseꟷone that kinda messes with that.

[starfoxrry]

do u have any abo fic rex:(

here are some that ive recently read !

in a world alone

Harry’s breath catches as the glow grows bigger and bigger until he’s squinting his eyes and blinking at the sudden intense brightness. He closes his eyes, rubbing at them helplessly. When his eyes open again- he gasps, grip loosening on his bow as he gawks at the sight before him.

Because the swan is gone.

And in its place is the prettiest omega Harry has ever seen.

A Swan Lake AU

Compete Against the Stars

“We should probably keep our distance,” Harry says, now backing up until he’s leaning against the wall opposite of Louis. It already feels too far away. “I don’t know if I can handle not being able to touch you in some small way.”

Louis nods and looks down. “The solstice will be here soon,” he murmurs.

“And with it, our mates,” Harry finishes, his voice cracking at the last word.

An ABO au where Louis finds out he's claimed to another Alpha. Angst ensues.

Habit

In which Louis is a Donna who has a soft spot for alpha Harry.

Promise Me You Wont Run Away

“Does kissing me stop you from having bad thoughts?” Harry asked, voice muffled into the collar of Louis’ dress shirt. Louis chuckled at this. He trailed a hand down Harry’s back, feeling the muscles tensing along with his touch.

“I guess you can say that. You’re a good distraction.”

“Then I will be the best distraction.” Harry answered, pulling back and watched Louis’ lips unashamedly.

“Come distract me, then.”

Or the Prince/ Knight AU in which Harry left Louis, but the omega never once gave up on them.

Royal Desires

“Yes. Harry should help me through my h-heat,” Louis shuddered, looking away from his mother because it was getting really weird by now. “Please leave, Mum.”

“Right,” Jay exhaled in relief. “Ring the bell for Zayn to get you anything. Remember, no knotting or bonding. And…have fun?”

“Out!”

When Prince Louis falls into an early heat, his new personal guard Harry Styles is brought in as his heat partner for the time being until Louis finds a suitable royal prince to bond and take the throne with. The only problem is that Harry is everything Louis wants but can't have. Freedom, tattoos, individuality...and quite possibly love.

In The Heat of the Moment

When Louis unexpectedly goes into heat in maths class it takes him way too long to figure out why (it might have something to do with a certain curly haired boy sitting next to him).