#just about to watch rina's set now

[dangerliesbeforeyou]

i need y'all to immediately watch hozier's performance of take me to church at glastonbury!!

[mj0702]

The other Bronze – Part 14

For Lunatic... I hope you're doing better and I hope you read this and find some comfort in it - mom and dad love you to the most and back Lunatic ♥️♥️

Sarina parked it just a little bit away from the hotel and turned in her seat to look at you

“We still need to talk Liefje” Sarina said sternly pulling you back into the car

“Don't worry – I found a weak link” you said happily

“Not what I was thinking about but.. good job” the dutch said “.. Leah said you tried to kill yourself – I want to know why”

“Seriously... I swear that was a one time thing and I'm better now” you said upset

“Not what I asked... I want to know WHY” the blonde stayed stricter

“I... I felt so alone... Lucy was gone... Keira just moved to Barcelona.... I mean the girls a great but... they're not Luce or Kei... somehow me stupid brain convinced me that they left and broke up because of me... and that they wouldn't care if I was around or not... so I got some pills from grandmas cabinet and just took them all...” you said not looking at the dutch

“... and then?” Sarina said lowly

“... I got scared... like... I suddenly knew that it was a mistake... so I wanted to call Hempo but I clicked the wrong number... got Leila on the phone.. I didn't knew her very well just in passing – but she came... she asked me where I am after I cried into the phone that I'm scared. I even called her Laurie... you know... she didn't KNOW me – but she came...and before I knew it I threw up... I'm basically still alive because of her... Lei then called Hempo... mills turned from that moment....” you recapped the night it all happened

“But why Liefje.... you know you could always come to me – or to one of us” Sarina tried again to understand you

“I can't tell you why Mama Rina.... I don't know... I just felt so alone... but I swear I never ever thought about it again” you stressed out

“If you EVER feel the need to do something like that again I want you to call me” the blonde took your hand strongly and with her second hand she made you look at her “Okay?”

“Okay... I promise...” you nodded lightly

“Good... so... that weak link....” Sarina smiled slightly

“Now or after dinner? Because I AM kind of hungry” you look embarrassed

Sarina laughed out loud but nodded anyway

“Of course Liefje... come on now” she laughed as the two of you exit the car

The dutch laid her arm around your shoulders pulling you into her side as the two of you walked the short distance to the Hotel. You laid your head on her shoulder enjoying the rare moment of peace you get with the head coach.

“Hey... hey y/n... we saved you a seat!!!!” you heard Tooney before you saw her

“Go” Sarina smiled lovingly as she released you from her hold

You sprinted over to the table quickly sliding into the chair between Less and Tooney before Keira or Leah could grab you. You sat opposite to your girlfriend sending her a small smile knowing Lucy was watching you two with hawk eyes. Suddenly you felt your chair being pulled back a little bit. You squeaked surprised as you felt the chair being lifted.

“You really think I would let you sit at the kids table??” you heard Keira as you looked up you saw Millie and Mary holding the sides of your chair about a foot in the air

“Sorry BB” Millie smiled apologetic “She has dirt on me”

“You can't be serious” you exclaimed trying to slip off the chair

“You will get the same food at my table” Keira said dry as she nodded her head and Millie and Mary started to carry you (chair included) over to the grown up table and dispose you next to your sister while Keira sat down to your other side

“I don't wanna sit here” you whined “This table is boring”

“Excuse me? Do I look like I care? The last time you three sat next to each other you got us kicked out of a restaurant” Keira said nonchalantly

“It was NOT our fault that the flame thingy fell over and set the table on fire” you said upset

“You prodded it the whole time even after I told you to leave it alone” Keira now growled

“I found it fascinating.. the flame was blue” you said ashamed

“Give up Bubs... you stuck with us for tonight” Lucy now sighed “She won't let you go back”

“You can overrule her... sister tops...” you said hopefully

“Oh Bitsy... your sister tops absolutely nothing” Keira smiled sweetly as she lightly slapped your cheek “Now eat”

You looked down on your plate and pulled a disgusted face

“What's that?” you prodded at your food

“Chicken” Keira said as she started to eat

“THAT is not chicken...” you pointed at the light hill on your plate

“That's the rice with sauce” Keira rolled her eyes “That is the chicken” she said as she pushed the rice a little aside

“And that green stuff... I don't do green stuff..” you argued again choosing the difficult route today – she wanted a kid. She'll get a kid.

“Spinach” Leah now answered as her best had her mouth full

“Ew no... not eating that” you huffed leaned back in your chair crossing your arms in front of your chest

“Suit yourself... go to bed hungry” Keira shrugged her shoulders “If you ever THINK of throwing a fit later because you're hungry you and I will have a private talk and you know these never end good for you”

“I want food... not... that” you pouted and whined

“Bitsy come on... you're not three... just eat” Keira said and you heard that she's about to lose her last nerve with you

Still you shake your head not moving towards the plate again

“Bubs come on... you haven't eaten since breakfast” Lucy now tried the nice approach – good cop, bad cop “You must be hungry”

“I AM... but I want something tasty” you whined

“It's very tasty... just try it... for me?” your sister spoke softly smiling hopefully.

“Hey Pumpkin... you interested in a deal?” now Beth interrupted the interaction knowing how important it was to get some food into you

“Listening” you answered and glanced at her

“Two forks equals one stroopwaffle... if you finish your plate – spinach included a whole extra pack” Meado smiled encouraging

“One fork one waffle” you shot back

“No can do... two for one...” Beth leaned back in her chair grinning

“Two extras at final whistle then” you tried your luck again

“I'll give you two extras if you eat your salad too” the brown haired woman smirked

“Okay now you're pushing it” you huffed out

“Two for one and an extra if you finish the plate” Meado leaned forward extending her hand.

“Two extras” you said seriously

“Nope... no deal” Beth said as she pulled her hand back

“Okay okay... two for one and one extra” you said quickly nearly jumping on the table to grab Beth hand “but from the good shop in Amsterdam”

“Deal” Meado grinned as she saw Keira mouthing a “thank you” towards her

You recutlanty started to pick up some rice and chicken with your fork. Everyone at the table knew you were a picky eater. Always have been and always will be – but if you had found something you liked you would eat like a harvester. But also you would go days without actual food if there was nothing you would find interesting. You carefully brought the fork to your lips just to feel the usual knot in your stomach putting the silverware down quickly

“No... sorry... can't do it” you said as you quickly stood up basically fleeing the table and the room.

Everyone looked after you confused. The first one who reacted was in fact Georgia as she pushed her chair back with such a force that it fell over backwards running after you. Lucy tried to run after the two of you but got stopped by Keiras hand on her arm

“Leave them...” the blonde said softly

“But what if...” Lucy tried

“If what...” Leah asked now

“If G takes advantage of her state – we know how fragile she is at the moment” your sister said a little stressed

“Excuse me?” Keira said shocked “That's G we're talking about – you know damn well this girl has a heart of gold and as big as five field... and she's not the brightest sometimes... she doesn't even know what it means to take advantage of someone”

“I'm just....” your sister defended herself

“I know... but you need to let her grow up... it's not easy for me either but let her be Luce” Keira said softly

You quickly sprinted outside the hotel actually jumping over some luggage which was standing around from guests just checking in. Once outside you looked around frantically as you saw the next best bush. You quickly got over there and just started to throw up. This was how your girlfriend found you. Hunched over a bush heaving loudly. Wordless she stood next to you rubbing small soothing circles on your back offering silent support. After a few minutes you got yourself up right again and leaned backwards against the wall

“What happened” G asked keeping her voice down

“Just got too much” you mumbled closing your eyes “Thank you”

“For what?” Georgia asked confused

“Coming after me...” you murmured suddenly feeling tired and exhausted

“I'll always come after you – and if I have to run to the end of the world” your girlfriend answered whispering as she both manoeuvred you into a sitting position

“Sap” you smiled with your eyes closed but leaning against her “We probably shouldn't be so close – what if fans see?”

“Let them... don't care” your girlfriend mumbled back “only care about you right now”

“You would...” you started

“Don't care... you're important to me, you know?” she interrupted you quickly knowing where this conversation would go if she'd let you go on

“You're important to me too G...” you said serious “... that's why we need to talk”

“Are you breaking up with me?” Georgia asked and you heard the panic in her voice

“No... no... but you might want to break up with me after that talk” you mumbled

“Did... did something happened... with someone... in Barcelona?” your girlfriend asked unsure

“Yes... that too... but not like you think” you sighed knowing you can't push that conversation further away anymore “But you need to promise me to let me finish and not interrupt me”

“Okay...” Georgia said carefully

You took a deep breath before you started to talk

“I'm telling you this because you are so SO important to me – not even Kei knows this... or god forbid Lucy... did I ever tell you why Leila and I are so close?” you looked at her and G shook her head before you continued “She saved me G... literally... she saved my life... two years ago, when Kei moved to Spain too... I felt so alone... I know Toons was there... and Less... and Leah... and all of them... but in the same time no one was there... it was bad enough to lose Lucy to Spain.. But I still had Keira... but when she moved too – it broke me G... I know she had to for her career... and I would never ever blame her for what happened but it broke me. I had no one to go to – I was still laborating on my ACL and I didn't know what to do. I fell G and I fell hard. I was rock bottom and I didn't know how to get back on top again...” you started to feel the tears threatening to fall “... so I got all the pills my mom had in her cabinet threw them all in a bag mixed them up and just took a handful... and suddenly I got so SO scared... the sensible part of my brain asked me if I'm bloody serious to choose the easy way out. Out of panic I wanted to call Hempo of all people – you know how she would react in a situation like that. She would panic herself. But she was the nearest to where I was. I pressed the wrong contact and Leila answered the call. Don't know why but she did. I didn't even realized my mistake and just started sobbing into the phone what I just did and that I'm scared and where I am and to please help me”

You were full on crying now. Not the loud outgoing cry, just silently as your tears run down your cheeks onto falling onto your shirt

“I don't know how much time went past but suddenly I got yanked up from the bench I was sitting on and the person just bend me over and made me throw up.... wasn't the nicest thing in the world. After I came by a little more I realized Leila was the one holding me bend over asking me if I think that it was all of it or if there's some left in my stomach because she WILL shove her fingers down my throat again if she had to... told her I think that everything is out and she basically carried me to her car. She told me she's going to get me into hospital and who she should call. Told her Hempo – I knew the chain would work its way to Leah. Leila got me to the Hospital told them what happened and they took care of me. When I woke up the next morning Leah and Meado were sitting next to my bed. Leah looked like death heated over twice. Meado wasn't far behind. I felt so guilty that I started crying . Woke them both up with my sobbing. Leah informed me that they'll take me back with them – already talked to my mom and dad about it. She also told me that they told them it's because she thinks a change of scenery would benefit me – dad agreed knowing how hard I took Lucys moving. Went back to London with them and god – Leah can be worse than a jail guard... I went to therapy... three times a week... it was always Leah or Beth picking me up afterwards... until it was Millie and somehow with Millie I just broke down. I held it together for Lee and Meado... but Millie with her calm persona and just being there – I think I cried for hours. Woke up in Meados guestroom... was the first time I met Viv officially as the girlfriend. It got better after that day – really better. Leah basically held me hostage for another six month – she even made me join her at the Arsefacility for light workouts. Let me tell you they have all that great stuff in their gym and still are shit” you smiled through your tears keeping your eyes fixed straight ahead staring into nothing so you didn't see your girlfriend crying too “ … and then a few days in Barcelona I had a full blown anxiety attack because Mapí played a ball wrong and it came at me. I got it under control played it back to Kei before even realizing what I was doing and then all of them were looking at me like I just scored a World cup winner... got to much and everyone of them saw.. I tell you because I know Sarina wants a friendly against Spain end to camp – when she announces it you act surprised – and they will ask if everything is okay... because that's how they are... It was weird at the begin...”

Suddenly your conversation got roughly interrupted by your sister who pulled G up by her shirt away from you already started yelling at her. You got scared for a second before you quickly jumped to your feet going after your sister who had your girlfriend pinned to the wall by now. Georgia was white her eyes wide as Lucy kept yelling at her

“What have you done Stanway??? I listened to Keira and let YOU go after her to find her crying her eyes out” your sister yelled in Georgias face pushing her harder against the wall

“Lucy please... it wasn't her” you begged your sister tugging on her arm “it wasn't her and it's not because of her... Luce please”

But it was no use since Lucy just saw red. She just came out to check on you knowing you always need air when you feel trapped. What she saw broke her heart and made her blood boil. She saw you crying and your girlfriend just sitting next to you doing nothing. It was irrational she knew but she swore to protect you and if it costed it the place on the national team than she would pay that price but she won't let anyone hurt you.

“Lucy.... please” you tried again as fresh tears sprung to your eyes and again your plea fell to deaf ears as your sister continued to ignore you in favor of yelling at your girlfriend

So you looked around for help and spotted Keira and Leah at the elevators on the other side of the lobby. You quickly ran over to the doors who opened and yelled through the hotel lobby

“Keira!!!” you hoped to get her attention. Your voice must have sounded so distressed that Keira turned around quickly – Leah following suit and she spotted you standing in the automatic door “Help” you said louder but not yelling level.

Keira took off towards you before you could turn around Leah hot on her heels as you went over and tried to get Lucy off Georgia again. Keira and Leah came exit the hotel and quickly saw what brought you to such distress. They immediately got into action mode pushing themselves between Lucy and Gs bodies. You were still trying to tug your sisters arm off Georgias shirt. Thank god Keira and Leah were much more successful (perks of knowing how to separate players from experience) and quickly got your sister and girlfriend separated. You immediately went over to your girlfriend who was still rooted in place shock and fright clear on her face.

“You okay?” you asked lowly “She didn't hurt you did she?”

“Just shaken up... didn't see that coming” Georgia said back lightly shaking

You let Keira and Leah deal with Lucy while you checked your girlfriend over once more needing to make sure she really was not injured. After you were satisfied with your check you turned around seeing Keira poking Lucys chest furiously on the other side of the entrance. Leah stood nearly in the middle of the two parties having an eye on both sides. She met your eye and you let her know that everything was okay and even tho G was shaken up she was not injured. At the way Keira was now waving her hands around and your sister looking ashamed and guilty you knew Kei was pissed and Lucy was at the receiving end. You saw Leah coming over to you and stepped into your field of vision

“Are you okay?” the captain asked concerned

“Yeah... just... got a little scared... don't know what got into her” you mumbled

“Keira is sorting it out right now” Leah said lowly “You okay G?”

“Yeah...” your girlfriend nodded slightly

“You want to report it to Sarina? Or want me to tell her?” Leah asked seriously “You're calling it G... I don't know what happened but I know you didn't provoke her so Lucy laying her hands on you...”

“No...” your girlfriend interrupted her friend “... I just want to talk to her... alone”

“Are you sure G?” Leah asked again

“Yes I'm sure...” Georgia nodded again “... I don't want her thrown of the team Lee... I just want to know why”

“Your call G...” Leah sighed and called over “Kei... lets go” before looking at you “You come with us”

“Da Fuck I will” you said stubborn

“Babe it's okay... let me sort this out okay...” your girlfriend said calmly

“I swear Lucy... if you even as much as look at her the wrong way I will end you” you sneered as you passed your sister getting pulled along by Leah

You don't know how much time passed as you watched through the big glass windows as your girlfriend and sister having a talk outside the hotel with you inside the lobby

“Calm down Bitsy...” Keira said as she pulled you into her side “... G's a big girl... she can handle it”

“I know... but Kei... Luce basically attacked her with no reason” you huffed but let Keira comfort you a little bit

“I know it sounds like a cheap excuse but... she just got scared about your well-being... I KNOW you are also a big girl Bitsy... but you'll always be her little girl... she's trying Bitsy... but seeing you cry made her snap” the blonde mumbled as she pulled you closer

“But it wasn't because of G... I told her what happened in Barcelona and I couldn't stop the tears... G had nothing to do with it” you said as fresh tears starting to form in your eyes “and she didn't listen... Lucy didn't listen to me... I can't do this Kei... I can't have my sister and my girlfriend fighting... or my sister fighting my girlfriend – she needs to stop”

“She will Bitsy... it just takes some time for her to come to terms with it... she's not good with change either – where do you think you got it from?” Keira smiled slightly

After what seemed like forever in your mind you got surprised as you saw your sister and girlfriend hugging. Not an awkward hug. It was a full on bear hug. Like the hugs you only accept from a few people in your life – full of love and unspoken promises. You watched as they parted again but Lucy kept her arm around Gs shoulders as they walked back into the lobby stopping right in front of Keira and you

“You two dating now?” you asked raising an eyebrow

“Yeah about that babe...” Georgia smirked playing along

“It's fine... I'll just take your best friend then...” you waved off starting to grin

“Does Leah know about this?” Keira now asked faking confusion

“Not talking about Leah” you smirked as you pressed yourself further into the blonde

“That... looks so wrong” Lucy looked horrified

“YOU asked me if it was Keira!!” you exclaimed accusingly

“and THAT was a genuine mistake...” your sister defended herself quickly “... but you made it looked like it was!”

“I was just wearing her shorts!!!” you bantered back

“What in our world means that you're basically engaged!!!” Luce fired back

“Where's my ring?” you turned to Keira expectantly raising your eyebrow again

“EXCUSE ME?!” Georgia exclaimed fake shocked “You're engaged and making moves on me?? Keira I swear I didn't know”

“Meeh... it's alright G... thought I give her the chance to get it out of her system before tying her down... because that's over then... and she was drooling over you for a long time” Keira waved off before all of you bursted out laughing

“Luce...” you said getting serious again “... you can't do that... you can't freak out like that again”

“I know... I'm sorry Bubs... It's just...” your sister tried to explain but couldn't find the right words so Keira helped her out

“It's not easy for us Bitsy... we love you so much and even if we KNOW that G would never ever hurt you – seeing you cry is hard for us” the blonde said as she started to scratch the back of your neck lightly “.... we went through so much together that we just want to protect you – and again... we know that that one wouldn't hurt you on purpose but still... seeing you crying and in distress just flips a switch... the difference is that I have WAY more self-control than your sister” Keira explained quietly

“I'll never hurt her I promise” G said quickly her eyes wide

“I know G... I know you'll never hurt her on purpose but there will be hurt... because that's how a relationship works – it's not always sunshine and rainbows... you both have to work for it and you have to communicate” Keira said serious “We'll always be there to support you and if you want give advice – you're both young and we know what it's like to be separated for some time...”

“Thanks Kei” you mumbled into her shoulder

“Always Bitsy...” she smiled as she pressed a kiss to your forehead “And G”

“Yeah?” your girlfriend asked weary

“For god sakes... grow some balls and defend your girl” Keira said sternly “Lucy can take some bollocking – because that will be something she has to deal with when we're back in Spain anyway”

“I have to what?” your sister asked horrified knowing Keira doesn't fuck about

“We'll have a talk when we're back... just you and me... in private” the blonde informed your sister who shrunk back a little under the intense stare of her ex-girlfriend

“Uuuuhhh... someone is in troooouuuble” you sing-songed snickering

“You want to be added to the list?” Keira raised her eyebrow looking down at you

“Yeah no thank you” you quickly said sheepishly

“Thought so... now off you go... it's late and it was an eventful day – I can see and feel the exhaustion from you” the blonde scoffed before pushing you off her slightly

“Luce” you whined and your sister immediately turned around to give you a piggy back ride

You unceremoniously climbed on her back letting her carry you to the elevator getting you to your room while Keira and G stayed behind

“I'm sorry for what happened G” Keira started

“It's okay Kei...” Georgia waved off

“No it's not G... it's not okay what Lucy did” the blonde interrupted her best friend quickly “... she shouldn't have reacted that way... and I promise you it'll never happen again I make sure of it... but I want you to understand that Bitsy is her everything – Lucy wouldn't think twice to jump in front of a truck for her... both of us wouldn't think twice but Lucy would be quicker. She went through so much and never actually talked about it or grieved you know – when she got the news of it being her ACL again and this time she's forced to stop playing... she just... sat there” Keira said remembering the day as if it happened yesterday “... she just sat there – 13 years old... blank face... shrugging her shoulders – Lucy and I kept it together until we were home and then first Lucy broke and then me... but her... she just – I don't want to say accepted it but she just bottled it up... she lost her spark that day – and slowly it's coming back... you are the reason for that G... you don't know it but you help her heal more than Lucy and I could in the last three years”

“I... didn't do anything” your girlfriend said confused

“You treat her right G... and that's enough for her” Keira smiled slightly

“I nearly didn't... you know... if it wasn't for her stubbornness” Georgia admitted shyly

“What do you mean? And yes... everyone with the name Bronze is stubborn as fuck” the blonde said rolling her eyes

“She kissed me you know... after the Euros... I was... drunk... but sober enough to kinda realize what’s happening... I pulled her outside the locker room and told her this can't happen..” your girlfriend explained to her best friend “... I told her she's too young and this isn't what she wants... she told me she may be young but she definitely knows what she wants... and that's me... she was so adamant... but I pushed her away a few time... until she showed up at me apartment in Munich – god only knows where she got the info from where I live – and just TOLD me that she won't accept me saying “no” anymore and she'll definitely won't let me run away and hide anymore... my whole self-control broke that moment....”

“So you did have sex with her before her birthday... because that's what she told Luce... that you waited till her birthday” Keira questioned

“No... god no... I didn't touch her that way before her birthday... I swear Kei... I mean there were some moments where it nearly got to that point but I stopped... I SWEAR K...” Georgia said quickly

“G... even if you did have sex with her before... it's in the past and nothing can change it... I know how the Bronze women can be... once they have something set their mind on it takes an army to get them to get them off the rails... it doesn't matter if it's Lucy or Bitsy or Sophie or Diane...” Keira smiled “... you will experience that in future a few times – and I wish you good luck and already feel sorry for you at the same time... but what Luce did earlier is still not okay”

“We talked it out K... I swear it's okay... she promised to hold back” your girlfriend assured

“You could talk to Sarina...” Keira said but this time Georgia interrupted her

“No... she apologized we talked it out... done and dusted... I understand her Kei... I really do... because if I see someone making me girlfriend cry I would snap too” your girlfriend waved off

“Great...” Keira mumbled “... another one I have to keep an eye on... the next time I get asked what I would do if I don't play professionally football anymore I say “zookeeper”... got plenty of experience in keeping wild animals under control”

Georgia burst out laughing and offered her best friend her hand to pull her off the couch. Keira accepted the hand gladly and let G pull her into a standing position.

“You're getting old Walsh” Georgia teased when Keira groaned getting pulled into an upright position

“No... I'm just over the whole shite” Keira grumbled as she turned around to leave

“Love you Walsh” G yelled after her

“Love you Stanway” Keira yelled back making Georgia smile

Lucy noticed you were asleep before you two even made it to your room. The way your head slowly sank deeper onto her shoulder was a clear indicator – as well as your light snoring and the occasional smacking of your lips. Your sister “knocked” on the door using her foot adjusting her hold on you. LJ opened annoyed but perked up immediately when she saw Lucy

“Yeah?” LJ asked

“Just here to deliver Bubs...” Lucy said being a little icy towards the younger player

“Oh... okay” LJ said stepping aside letting Lucy in

Your sister disposed you carefully and with practical ease on the bed and started to pull your socks and trousers off your legs

“She's 16... I think she's capable of undressing herself” LJ bit a little too harsh which caused Lucy to narrow her eyes at her teammate

“I am aware... but I also know her... look LJ... I don't know what your twos problem is but when it comes down to it – she's my baby sister... and whoever hurts her better makes his last will because I won't have it...” Lucy said seriously as she made sure your scars were covered quickly

“Lucy... I know that okay... and yes we're not really friends anymore” LJ started and Lucy snorted “... but I think we can be civil with each other.. I mean you and me know she swapped my cleats and I did nothing to her did I now”

“I really like you as a person and a player LJ...” Lucy sighed before pressing a kiss to your head “... but again.. she's my baby sister”

“We will figure it out” LJ said and if you weren't asleep you would've bursted out laughing – because from your side there was no “figuring it out”

“Morning” you greeted Meado at the elevators the next morning

“Morning pumpkin” Beth greeted back giving you a once over “You okay?”

“Gettin there... need coffee” you said slowly clearly still half asleep as you felt Meado putting her arm over your shoulders pulling you into her side

“Pumpkin I know you don't want to hear it but I need you to eat something too okay... I know you can go longer than 24 without food but it's not healthy” Beth said a little concern in her voice.

She as well haven't forgotten what happened two years ago. How Leah called her full on sobbing that she needs to get to Manchester as quick as possible but she can't go on her own because she probably would crash the car. Of course Beth immediately was on board picking Leah up not even 15 Minutes later. Leah was an emotional mess. Meado actually didn't find out what happened until there were about 30 Minutes out of Manchester. And when Leah finally told her – Beth nearly lost control over the car. So yes – your well-being also was important to her.

“Yeah I know... yesterday was just...” you started ashamed

“... emotional... I know...” Meado finished for you smiling slightly

“Morning” you heard suddenly as Keira stood behind the two of you

“Morning Kei” Meado said happily while you just grunt in response

“Come here Bitsy” Keira said lovingly opening her arms knowing you always need longer and more importantly physical contact in the mornings

The elevator arrived and all three of you entered it to go down to breakfast. One floor down Millie and Rach entered the elevator and you immediately whined for Millie to carry you. As usual you had everyone wrapped around your finger and so it happened that you got carried to the breakfast room where surprisingly Sarina waited for you with a coffee in your hand

“We need to talk, Liefje” the dutch said you still clutched to Millies back pushing the mug into your hands “So ex that and with me”

“What did you do to make the big boss angry?” Millie asked confused as she set you down looking after Sarina who was just leaving

“You're guess is as good as mine” you shrugged your shoulders downing the coffee shuffling after the dutch into an empty meeting room

“What can I do for you great masteress of lionesses?” you tried to lighten the mood

“What happened yesterday?” Sarina came straight to the point looking at you expectantly

“Huh?” you looked at her confused

“Why were two of my best players at each other throats AGAIN yesterday after dinner?” the dutch said and you knew not to fuck about

“There was a misunderstanding” you said carefully

“Elaborate” Sarina said seriously and you noticed she's getting angry

“I told G about what happened... two years ago... and in Barcelona... because I wanted to be honest with her... I started crying... I didn't even noticed I was crying... and suddenly Lucy was there having a go at G... but Kei and Leah took care of it” you spilled immediately trying to low the blow

“Okay... okay...” the dutch sighed out massaging her temples

“I didn't mean too” you said quickly feeling incredibly guilty

“It's not your fault... but I need to talk to both of them... this can't go on” Sarina said seriously “I can't have my squad fighting each other”

“I know” you sighed ashamed “... I don't know what's going on with Lucy... because G did nothing and Luce is constantly out for her...”

“Your sister is protective, Liefje” Sarina said softly “And it's hard for her to see you dating”

“But... I'm not a baby anymore” you said desperately

“Liefje... you were with her your whole life – there were rumours that you are her daughter instead of her sister” the dutch chuckled

“Ugh” you gagged slightly

“I want something else from you” Sarina now leaned against the big table

“Ehrm... I feel honoured but... Ehrm... you are a little to... experienced for me Mama Rina” you stuttered scratching the back of your neck

“Dear god kiddo... it's not all about sex in life...” the dutch rolled her eyes “... I want you to come up with a exercise for training – teamwork and communication”

“Why are you including me so much...” you asked a little confused

“Because I know how great you can be – you always sell yourself short... I want you to realize how amazing you are and live it” Sarina said softly “... and I want to inform you that we indeed have a friendly against Spain in 10 days”

“Yes... I really want to face them” you said happily “... I really want Less and Toons to meet Mapí”

“Liefje... I will put you on a leash you if you plan on doing something stupid” the dutch pointed her finger at you

“I just want to.... cultivate international relations...” you said carefully

“You want to cause trouble – I will talk to Lucy about your harness... what was the name?” Sarina waved off

“Bronzo” you murmured defeated

“Ah yes... now... I want you to come up with an exercise and a strategy for the game against Spain” the dutch said and you know your little “meeting” was over

“Yes Mama Rina” you sighed already thinking about different drills

“Oh and y/n?” Sarina held you back as you were about to leave

“Yes?” you looked up a little shocked

“Send your sister and girlfriend in” the dutch smirked and winked at you

“Will do” you smiled widely “With pleasure”

“BRONZE!!! STANWAY!!” you yelled when you entered the breakfast room and all heads snap towards you

“Big Bossies wants to talk to you” you nodded towards the meeting room

Both your sisters and your girlfriends face went white as they stood up walking slowly past you with Georgia stopping shortly

“Are we out?” G whispered lowly

“Don't think so... but I can't say for sure” you whispered back grabbing her hand and squeezing it encouraging

“If that's the case I'll still be around – we can invade Leahs apartment” Georgia smiled lightly but you saw right through it

“She won't kick you out.. she'll kick your ass and that's it... she knows it's not you who causes trouble... it's Luce” you leaned up quickly pressing a kiss to your girlfriends cheek

“STANWAY!!” now Sarina yelled down the corridor

Georgia quickly let go of your hand and ran down the corridor.

“They're in trouble?” Keira asked you as you plopped down in the chair next to her inspecting Keiras plate who immediately pushed it towards you

“Yeah.... somehow Sarina knows about yesterday” you mumbled “... hey Kei?”

“Yes Bitsy?” the blonde smiled at you

“Can I have eggs?” you asked embarrassed

“Of course Bitsy.. why do you ask?” Keira looked at you confused

“Don't know.... just feel like it” you shrugged your shoulders

“Come on Bits... let's get you some breeki hm?” the blonde smiled encouraging and pulled you out of your chair leading you over to the buffet

“Take whatever you want Bitsy.... just... don't load your plate Bronze style” Keira smiled as you went over all the option

“Eggs... bacon...” you mumbled to yourself

“Something healthy” Keira threw in

“Guac....” you mumbled deep in thoughts “Uuuuhhh.... donuts”

“No” Keira smiled sweetly

“But” you whined childish

“No Bitsy... take some fruit and we're good” the blonde grinned

“But you said whatever I want” you whined again

“No donuts... you didn't do anything today what would justify a donut” Keira said and you knew you lost the donut for good

You sighed heavy and took an apple from the fruit basket

“Uuuuhhh... mom put her foot down” Rachel laughed as you passed they're table

Keira pushed you to walk on when she noticed you wanted to start arguing with the blonde and lead you back to your table. After you sat down you looked down on your plate with the apple next to it. You picked up the apple looked at it for a second before throwing it towards Rachel hitting her straight in the back of the head which caused the whole table (especially Millie) to interrupt in loud laughter and Rachel to swear loudly. Keira scolded you lightly but smiled nonetheless

Lucy, Georgia and Sarina entered the room. The two players looked like drowned puppies while the Head coach smiled satisfied. Georgia immediately took a detour towards Tooneys and Less table which caused you to frown. Lucy sat down opposite to you and you watched her closely

“All good?” you asked

“All good” your sister answered before continuing to eat

“Okay Girls... this was a really good training so far” Sarina yelled over the field clapping her hands

“Our new addition here” she pulled you next to and in to a hug “will have the honour for the last exercise of the day”

All Lionesses looked at you expectantly and you suddenly felt a little shy

“I didn't agree to your offer” you mumbled shyly

“You will” Sarina smiled happily “I'm pretty positive about it – now go and show them what you got”

“Okay Ladies... and Lucy” you said loudly grinning after the little pep talk

“Hey!!” your sister exclaimed annoyed as the team began to chuckle

“Listen up... we're playing Hungry Hippo” you clapped your hands and Rachel “woohooed” loudly

“For everyone who doesn't know Hungry Hippo... it's simple... teams of three each... every team gets four balls... you have to defend your balls and also have to steal the balls of the other teams... team who is out of eggs first runs laps until the game is over” you explained quickly

“What's the goal of the game?” Niamh asked

“Goal of the game is to get all the balls in one “nest”... the goal of the exercise is teamwork and communication... you need to work together and communicate with each other” you explained “And before you ask... I put the teams together”

“Aaaawww maaaaan” you heard Less groan

“Walsh, Stanway, James” you rattled off ignoring one of your best friends

“Russo, Williamson, Toone” you smirked knowing you just got Leah back for the rooming incident

“WHAT??” the capitan exclaimed shocked

“YES!!” Tooney and Less high-fived

“Daly, Bright, Mearps” you continued and split all the players into teams

“Really?” Sarina asked under her breath but loud enough that you could hear her “Walsh, Stanway and James?”

“Kei and G are pissed at James – rightfully so but still need to learn to keep it off the pitch” you mumbled back

“Genius move – I need you in my team” Sarina smiled

“And you will.. I want Jill Scott as my guardian” you said off handy

“Done” the dutch answered quickly and smiled widely

“And we will talk about numbers... I want a good salary” you smirked at her

“You haven't even seen the contract and already start hackling?” Sarina laughed

“I saw Lucys contracts over the years... they were shit..” you pointed out

“We'll talk about it later... now let them run” the blonde dutch smiled and you grabbed her whistle successfully pulling the short woman closer to you and blew that whistle hard

Immediately there interrupted chaos on the field and you couldn't help but laugh loudly when Lucy rugby tackled Rachel to the ground who tried to steal a ball from your sisters nest. The little game continued for some while – for a hot second it looked like Keiras team was loosing since they did everything than communicating with each other but the recovered quickly and got some balls back. You also saw how different the teams approach their tactics to defend and retrieve. Team Bright for example had Mearps AND Bright on defending egg duty while Rach zipped around stealing balls. Lucys team had only Lucy for defence and Lotte and Meado for retrieval. It was honestly too funny and you turned around to the media team

“Oi edits.... get some footage of that... fans will love it” you laughed as they quickly scramble to get some of the chaos on video

“Hey.... hey you” you shouted over to a guy who stood there a little lost and when he turned towards you you waved him over

“What's your job here?” you asked but still keeping an eye on the field

“I'm... a trainee” the dirty blonde said shyly

“Okay... perfect... go get coffee for the big boss and myself.... she takes it black like her soul – strong... basically like oil... I want a latte” you said smiling

“Where do I find coffee?” the young bloke said getting even more shy

“In the meeting rooms should be coffee machines.... just... take some from there” you looked a little unsure yourself “Oh... and what's your name?”

“Finney... friends call me Finn” he now smiled getting a little more comfortable talking to you

“Yeah no.... I'll just call you Fren... we're Frens now” you waved off “everyone who brings me coffee is a Fren”

“Okay... I promise I bring the best coffee I can find” he smiled before sprinting off

“Already abusing your status I see” Sarina smirked next to you

“Don't tell me you had enough time this morning to actually fulfil your caffeine fix” you said rolling your eyes

“Of course I didn't... I had to put your sister and girlfriend through the wringer AND put them on probation.... I was THIS close to put them on the naughty step” the dutch mumbled annoyed

“I would have paid to see that” you bursted out laughing “OI STANWAY.... STOP PULLING LOTTES PANTS DOWN!!!!”

“JEALOUS???” Lotte yelled back holding onto her shorts for dear life with Georgia hanging on the hem of them shorts trying to pull them down once again

“Not at all” you yelled back laughing at their antics “She already knows how comfortable the couch is...”

You saw a few seconds later how team “Two best idiots + Leah” lost their last ball and you grabbed Sarinas whistle (and Sarina) again whistling loudly. All Lionesses froze in their place and you grinned

“I really enjoy this” you said loudly smirking evilly “... Capitan oh Capitan....” you said dramatically “... your team is the first loosing all their Hippo eggs... so... you and your mates.... off you scramble... laps until the game is over”

“You can't do that” Leah growled knowing fully well you actually can make her run

“Oh but I can... I said beforehand the first team without Hippo eggs will run laps, Williamson” you smirked enjoying having the upper hand for once extremly “... sooooo... run”

Less and Tooney already jogging away from you knowing they wouldn't get out of it anyway so they just accepted their fate. Leah on the other hand was adamant to prove a point now looking at Sarina

“She can't do that” Leah said sounding a little like a small child

“She can... I gave her the task of finding a exercise for teamwork and communication – which she did – and I authorized it.... she said before you all started what will happen and you lost.... get going Leah...” Sarina said calmly knowing when to back you up and when you can defend yourself

Leah started to jog away still mumbling and growling under her breath

“Thank you Mama Rina...” you mumbled as you accepted your coffee from Finn

“No need Liefje... you were in the right and just because Leah wants to pull the capitan card doesn't mean she can do that all the time” the dutch said softly also accepting her coffee from the young lad.

The leftover players on the field were still looking at you expectantly and you realized you didn't restart the game

“Sorry guys” you smiled embarrassed

“Wait...” Grace (Clinton) said quickly before you were able to blew the whistle again

“Yeah Hillary?” you looked at her smirking

“First... please don't....” she sighed “second... what does the winner get?”

“Oh... winner gets the afternoon off – and gets a cheat meal extra” you smiled shrugging your shoulders

“Excuse me?? I didn't agree to that” Sarina exclaimed surprised

“Yeah well... I just thought of that” you looked at her apologetic

“The things I let slide with you” the dutch rolled her eyes and waved her hand for you to continue

“Love you Mama Rina” you smiled pressing a soft kiss to her cheek

“Yeah yeah” the blonde murmured but a smile tugged on the edge of her lips

You blew the whistle again and immediately there interrupted chaos again – the game ended with a tie (you were made to stop it by Sarina) between Team Walsh and Team Bronze. Which surprised everyone – especially you but you did internally congratulate yourself for fulfilling the task of brining the team closer together.

The Bus ride was mostly quiet except for Georgia and Esme (who was on Lucys team) discussing rather loudly what they would have as their cheat meal with Rachel throwing in Gs direction

“Little Bronze doesn't count you know... you can eat her as much as you like” the blonde smirked and immediately got Lucys dirty sock thrown in her face while you bursted out laughing next to Mearps and Georgia turning fire red once again. Back at the Hotel everyone went to their rooms to shower and get ready for Lunch and eventual media assignments. Lunch went over without a hitch – if you ignore the fact that your sister shooed your girlfriend away again – and soon all of you got the plan for the rest of the day.

You entered the room which was officially dubbed the “common get together”-room finding Lucy, Keira, Mary, Less, Tooney, Niamh, Meado and LJ (who you honestly could do without) chilling around. Some of them were lounging on the couch while Tooney, Less and Niamh were placed at the table playing with some Legos. You made a beeline for your two bestest friends as Keira looked up from her book

“No” the blonde just said knowing letting you sit with them would end up in a Lego fight and you'd throw pieces at each other until one got either hurt or cried

“Keira cooooome ooooon” you whined which caused Tooney and Less to look up

“Yeah Keira... cooooome ooooon” Tooney whined too

“Come here Bubs” Lucy said from her place on the couch stretched her hand towards you trying to get you to come over to her “Wanna show you something”

“You can always show it to LJ” you pulled a face and your voice was laced with venom

“Huh?” your sister looked at you confused as you turned around now marching towards Tooney like you were on a mission

“Bitsy” Keira warned you raising her eyebrow in challenge

“I'm just gonna sit here” you said annoyed and the blonde noticed your grumpy mood

“No Lego fights!” the blonde looked at you threating

“Okay mom” the three of you answered simultaneously grinning

Soon after Less got called away by the media team for some... whatever, you didn't pay attention. Tooney and you continued to build on your Lego castle but as usual after like 30 minutes you both got bored

You just looked at each other communicating without words – like always. You both stood up at the same time looking around until your eyes fell on the dart board that was hung up on the other side of the room. Tooney and you tried to be as sneaky as possible as you slandered over to said piece of fun without noticing Keira watching every step you took. Just as you were about to pull the third dart out of the board so Toons and you could play a hand reached over your shoulder taking all darts away

“I told you... no sharp objects” you immediately reconized the voice of one Keira Walsh

“They're not sharp...” you pouted as you turned around to look at her with your best puppy eye look

“No pointy objects either” Keira smiled sweetly and you knew it was fake as fuck

“But... Tooney and I wanted to play” you pouted

“Tooney is banned from pointy objects too” the blonde just said hoping to end this topic

“Tooney is what?” Ella said confused

“The last time you whined for a WEEK that your finger nearly fell off” Keira rolled her eyes “So no darts for you either... find something else”

“Oh yeah.. I forgot about that... it was really close for me finger to fall off” Tooney said as she remembered her last interaction with darts

“Your bloody finger was fine” you exclaimed

“Bloody... that's the word you should emphasize... so much blood” Ella sighed

“Less nearly broke my nose.... THAT was bloody... your finger was just... trickling blood” you said upset

“If you don't stop to one up each other immediately I'm going to put you in different corners of the room” Keira interrupted your “fight”

“Sorry mom” both of you said

“Gosh... can't you two play nicely with each other for once?” the blonde rolled her eyes

“We tried... you wouldn't allow it” you tried to reason with her

“No sharp or pointy objects” Keira said again “Find something else”

You looked over at Tooney who just shrugged her shoulders

“Uh... there's a bowling thing in the basement... can we go bowling? Nothing sharp, nothing pointy” you said excited as Tooney started to beam

“Not without a responsible adult around” Keira said “And I'm not going down there with you”

“Millie and Rach are down there... I think” you said as you tried to convince Kei

“Lucy?” the blonde turned around to your sister

“Yeah?” Lucy looked up from her phone where she (most likely) texted with Ona

“I just spoke english did I?” Keira asked her ex

“Ehrm... yes? Why?” your sister asked confused

“Good... I just thought I switched to spanish without noticing it when I said them two nobbheads won't go bowling in the basement without a responsible adult and Bitsys answer was Millie and Rachel... I just wanted to double check that I in fact did use the english language” the blonde said and you groaned behind her knowing she just shut down your idea

“Oh no... you definitely spoke english” Lucy smirked

“Mary??” you asked hopefully looking at the keeper

“Yeah okay...” the tall brunette rolled her eyes but smiled noneless “I'll take you bowling”

“YES!!” you high fived Tooney “Mary counts as responsible, right?” you checked with Keira

“Yes... Mary counts as responsible” the blonde sighed actually hoping you'd find no body who would go with you so she could keep an eye on you

“Woohoo...” you cheered chasing after Tooney who already was sprinting towards the door

“No running” Mary yelled after you but it was no use as she stood up following the two of you

“I'll give them 20 Minutes” Keira said plopping down next to Lucy on the couch

“Naah... Mearps is good... Bubs respects Mearps.... 30” your sister grinned as she started a timer

32 Minutes later the door of the common room got kicked open and Mary carried you bridal style inside to cross the room with quick strides. Tooney was following after you apologizing profusely while you whined into Marys neck

“32 Minutes and 17 seconds” Lucy looked down on her phone grinning stopping the timer showing it to Keira

“Should we follow or just ignore that something went horribly wrong... as always when these two are left to their own?” the blonde sighed looking expectantly at Lucy

“Naah... she has Mearps with her...” your sister waved off smirking knowing you'll throw an absolute fit once one of the physios wants to touch whatever limp is hurting at the moment.

A minute later the door opens again and Mearps head appeared

“Luce... Kei.... Help... please? She bit the new physio already” the brown haired keeper pleaded with her teammates

“Rock paper scissors?” Lucy asked raising her eyebrow

“2 out of 3 or at first go?” Keira just asked back already getting ready

“First go... we don't have the time for 2 out of 3” your sister said getting ready as well.

“Okay Bubs... why are you causing trouble again?” your sister sighed as she entered the medic room “And what happened in the first place?”

“I want Keira” you sniffled

“Yeah well... Keira won rock paper scissors so here I am” Lucy shrugged sitting down on the exam table next to you

“Tooney threw the bowling ball on me foot” you whined and Lucy REALLY needed to bite her tongue to not burst out laughing – leave it to Tooney and you to actually get hurt by a bowling ball

“We just wanted to take a look but she wouldn't let us touch her foot” one of the Medics explained to your sister

“It's okay... I got it” your sister smiled as she sat down further down on the table putting your foot into her lap which caused you to whine and try to pull away

“No Bubs... let me look” Lucy said softly starting to undo your laces and carefully pulling your shoe off your sock following just after the shoe

“Okay... I'm no medic but it doesn't look broken...” your sister said looking up at you “We'll just let the pros have a look at it okay Bubs”

You knew it was a rhetorical question but that doesn't mean you couldn't answer anyway

“No no no no no” you shook your head quickly

“Yes... come on Bubs... just a quick once over and we're out of here again – I'll even get you some cookies” Lucy said softly knowing you needed reassurance right now

“Okay... but I want a donut... the chocolate one” you mumbled

“Of course” Lucy chuckled nodding to the medics

Just as she promised they just did a quick once over put some tape on your foot and told Lucy you should keep weight off it for at least 24 hours before sending you on your way again. Your sister knew you would be stubborn about letting her help you so she quickly grabbed you before you could slide down from the table and carried you down the hall

“Lucy let me down” you yelled annoyed as your sister carried you into the common room

“I will...” Lucy said calmly looking for a place to dispose you “Stop wriggling”

“Now...” you grunted trying to get out of your sisters hold

“No...” Lucy grunted back “Kei help”

“Just put her down on the beanbag” the blonde said already coming over

“Keira...” you whined loudly

“Oh Bitsy... what have you done now?” Keira sighed seeing your taped up foot

“Toons just doesn't know how to bowl” you huffed crossing your arms over your chest

“I TOLD you to be careful” the blonde scolded

“I WAS... I stood behind her... ball needs to go forward.. not my fault she doesn't understand the rules” you grumbled back

“I'm really sorry” Tooney said from the table where she got placed down by Mary “gently” (gently means death glare and pointed finger)

“I know you are Toons” you grinned “You got me donut”

“Excuse me??” Keira exclaimed looking at your sister annoyed

“She was good... she deserves one” Lucy defended herself knowing by Keiras look that the blonde didn't agree

“Just like always Lucia” Keira snarled “You don't have to deal with her when she gets all hyperactive because of the sugar – you just sleep or disappear”

“I'll be good Kei... I promise” you said quickly not wanting that Keira and Lucy fight

“I know you Bitsy... you won't... so you can have your donut... tomorrow... and in small pieces” the blonde said strictly

“But...” you started but got shut down immediately by Keiras killer glare “Can I play Lego with Tooney?” you asked instead sheepishly

“You hate Lego” the blonde answered as a matter of fact

“There's nothing else to do” you whined

“You can just leave your ass seated for a hot minute” Keira sighed loudly throwing her arms in the air annoyed

“That's boring” you whined making grabby hands towards Keira

“Seriously Bitsy.... you and Tooney are a guaranteed headache” the blonde said but helped you up nonetheless

“y/n... Tooney... you up for some media contend?” a voice suddenly asked from the door

“YES!!” you and Tooney exclaimed quickly as you tried to hobble away from Keiras prying hands as quick as possible

“Great... we have something fun planned...” the man you named “edit” (because he edits all the contend for the Lionesses social media) grinned widely

“You need my approval” Lucy yelled out just as you and Toons slipped through the door letting it fall shut loudly

“Okay guys... first you gonna introduce yourself and then we gonna explain what you have to do” edit says as if you two did media for the first time

“We know how this works Steve” Ella rolled her eyes

“Okay... then... go” the black haired man said

“Hi guys... I'm Ella Toone” Tooney smiled brightly

“.. and I'm the smarter and better looking Bronze” you grinned into the camera

“You have a name you twat” Ella said hitting your shoulder

“I know I do... but I AM the smarter and better looking Bronze” you huffed back shoving Ella so she nearly fell of the chair

“Okay... so here's what you two will do today” one of the media guys explained from the background “Ella we going to blindfold you and we play a little taste test”

“Why am I getting blindfolded??” Tooney whined loudly while you grinned

“Because you so ugly they don't want their lenses to crack” you laughed

“Shut up” Ella shoved you hard pushing you successfully off your chair and you took the table down with you.

Tooney looked down at you shocked but a second later both of you exploded laughing

“Oh god... we should've paired someone else” one of the media guys said desperately already seeing this go horribly wrong

The staff help you up again and set up the table again before giving you a Lionesses scarf and tell you to cover Ellas eyes with it. After you done your bit and actually tested that Toons really doesn't see anything by pretending to hit her multiple times you grinned happily back into the camera

“What now?” you asked excited as you got handed a take out box

“Now you just have to feed that to Tooney and she has to guess what it is” edit says pointing to the box

You opened the box looked inside and immediately gagged loudly before closing it again.

“What?? What is it??” Ella asked alarmed

You opened the box again and now even just the smell resulted in you gagging even louder (the gag that comes from way down) – you felt like you nearly need to vomit

“y/n... you can't do that... stop gagging” Tooney said seriously already feeling her stomach tighten

“Sorry... but... no... no” you said again pulling your shirt over your nose heaving again

“STOP IIIIIT” Ella whined

“This stuff is making me heave... I can't stop” you gagged again turning away from the take out box “I swear Toons... I would be livid if they made me eat that...”

“Stoooop” Ella now whined desperately “You can't say shit like that and expect me to eat whatever it is”

“Okay... okay...” you breathed deeply reassuring – not Ella but yourself “okay... this isn't gonna be nice okay Toons... just... swallow it... don't taste it just swallow it down... ready?” you asked having a little bit of the brown substance on a wooden spoon

“Fuck me” Toons looked unsure

“Trust me Toons... just... down” you said unsure as you lined up the spoon with roughly Ellas mouth

“But...” as soon as Ella opened her mouth you shoved the spoon into her mouth pulling it out a second later

“Get that away from me” you pushed the take out box harshly so it nearly tumbles off the table before looking at Ella again who actually started to chew a little bit

“Toons... just swallow it... you're not a fucking gourmet” you exclaimed disgusted

“What is it?” Ella asked trying to guess the right flavor

“It's dog food I swear... it looks like the stuff Lucy gives Narla... Caesars or something” you said starting to heave again

“It's not...” Tooney said convinced “It's pâté... or something”

“THAT'S Pâté?” you asked confused since you were sure it was dog food

“It's not Pâté” one of the guys said from behind the camera

“IT'S NOT???!!!” Ella screeched

“Told you... it's dog food” you said offhandly

“It's chicken paste” the guy said

“Oh... oh... it's not bad actually” Tooney said nodding

“No... if you ever bring that near me again I'll break you legs” you gagged loudly again

Half an hour later the two of you left the media room and Tooney helped you hobble down the hallway.

“I swear Toons... it look like dog food” you mumbled needing to concentrate on your good foot

“But it was tasty” the brown haired girl said softly as she held you upright

“Hey” suddenly someone stood in your way

You looked up to see your girlfriend leaning casually against the wall

“Need a lift?” she smiled at you softly

“I would take a ride too” you winked and this time it was Ella who gagged loudly

"You know... I'm just gonna call you Georgiaswifey from now on" Tooney huffed as she helped you onto your girlfriends back

(if you want to see the inspirational video to that media moment of bb and Tooney...

https://www.instagram.com/reel/C0M5xD0oapm/?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==)

[kpop-stories-21]

A Boyfriend For Christmas

Group: Stray Kids

Pairing: Han x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 2.6k

Rating: 18-21+

Genres, Tropes, & AUs: Non-Idol AU, College AU, Romance AU, Strangers to Lovers, Fluff, Smut

Content & Trigger Warnings: Barista!Han, Student!Reader, strong language, unprotected sex(wrap that shit up kids), manhandling, oral sex(f receiving), edging, slight degradation, slight dumbification, intense orgasm, aftercare, after-sex cuddles

Summary: Telling your parents you had a boyfriend always kept them off your back about settling down. Now that they're coming up for Christmas your lie is about to be exposed. Luckily, Fate takes pity on you and has you running into a cute barista who captures your heart.

Tags: @kpop---scenarios @stardragongalaxy @jeonrose @skittlez-area512 @mybiasisexo @biaswreckingfics @anyamaris @trashlord-007 @liliesofdreams @rdiamond2727 @naturalogre @millennial-fangirl @twisted-tales-of-all @yoonguurt @staytinyville @dimpledsatan @kwanisms SKZ Tags: @lovelyhange

If you want to be added to my taglist, click here

Network pings: @kdiarynet | @cultofdionysusnet

Collab Masterlist | Main Masterlist

“Yes, Mom, I'm doing fine.” You sighed into the phone, rolling your eyes at her ill-founded concern.

“Don’t roll your eyes at me young lady.” Your mother scolded. “I’m just looking out for your wellbeing.”

“I know Mom, I know.” You admitted grudgingly. “Anyway, before you ask, my studies are going fine as well.”

“Good! Just remember, if at any point you want to change your major, you can go to your father’s friend Mr. Kim.”

“I’ll keep it in mind.” You said, knowing full well that you never would.

Just then your roommate Karina poked her head in and eyed you expectantly. You nodded in acknowledgement and began to end the call with your mother.

“I gotta go now Mom.”

“Okay sweetie. I’ll call back soon, I want to hear more about this new boyfriend of yours!”

Once you hung up, Karina stepped into your room.

“Still stalling her with the new boyfriend bit?” She inquired.

You nodded. “They haven’t questioned it so far.”

“Are they still planning to come up for Christmas?”

“Yeah, unfortunately.”

“So you have until then to find a guy?”

You frowned. “It’s either that or admit I’ve been lying, and that will not go over well.”

“Well, I wish you luck.” She said warmly. “I’m getting ready to head back home, you sure you’ll be alright staying here by yourself?”

“I’ll be fine Rina.” You say with a grin. “I can take care of myself.”

“Of that, I have no doubt.” Karina teased.

You laughed and chucked a pillow at her. “You better get going before your mom assumes you missing and calls the army.”

“Okay, Y/N! See you next year!”

After Karina left you fell into the same routine you always did, spending most of the day in the dorm room except for the few times you went outside to get coffee or takeout. A few weeks passed, and then came the dreaded call from your mother, announcing that she and your father would be coming up soon to spend Christmas with you.

Panic began to set in, and as you walked to the corner coffee shop one morning you wondered if you should maybe download Tinder or some other dating app. You were so lost in thought you failed to see the figure right in front of you until it was too late and you found yourself tumbling to the concrete, limbs tangled with those of whoever you had crashed into.

Looking up, you found yourself inches away from the most gorgeous man you'd ever seen. Eyes wide, the two of you just stared at each other for several moments until he finally snapped out of his daze and stood, brushing himself off before offering his hand. You took it and he gently pulled you to your feet.

“I am so, so sorry “ He began, remorse clear on his face. “I have a terrible habit of not watching where I'm going.”

You smiled comfortingly. “No, no, the fault is mine. My mind was elsewhere and I didn't even see you until we collided. It's me who should be apologising.”

He chuckled lightly. “Alright then. I happen to work at a coffee shop nearby, can I at least buy you a coffee or something to make it up to you?”

You needed no hesitation to answer his question. “You had me at coffee! I was heading to my favourite coffee shop anyway.”

“Perfect!” He exclaimed, smiling so widely his eyes disappeared.

“My name's Han Jisung, by the way. Most people just call me Han because they know at least one other Jisung.”

You grinned. “I'm Park Y/N and I happen to fall into that category as well! Nice to meet you, Han.”

As you walked you fell into a comfortable conversation with Han. He was easy to talk to, listening intently while also inserting little jokes and puns at the most opportune moments. Before you knew it the two of you were standing in front of the very coffee shop you’d been heading to before you ran into Han.

You were surprised, sure that you would have remembered seeing him there before. “You work here?!” You exclaimed. “I come here all the time, how come I’ve never seen you before?”

Han grinned. “I’ve only been here about a week, I’m kinda new in town.”

You nodded understandingly. “Ah, that would explain it.”

Han opened the door for you, making you blush a bit as you walked in. You’d been here enough times that you knew all the staff by name and considered them friends, so you received several greetings as Han stepped in behind you.

“Hey Han, you’re a bit early today.” Felix called out, blond hair in its usual ponytail.

“Yeah, me and Y/N here had a bit of a collision so I said I’d buy her a coffee to make up for it.”

Minho smirked mischievously. “Well I’m surprised she didn’t kiss you for that, Y/N-ah really loves her coffee.”

You glared at the brunette playfully. “Ha, ha. Very funny, Min.”

“I thought it was quite funny.” Black-haired Hyunjin quipped as he walked by.

You stuck your tongue out at him and he returned the gesture, stopping only when Jeongin started to complain about how grossed-out he was.

After ordering your coffee you sat down in a corner booth, watching fondly as they all teased poor Han about being perfect “boyfriend material” for you. Once they’d left him alone he came to join you, conversation picking right back up like nothing had ever happened.

Students and other people came in and out, oblivious as you talked with Han until his shift started. By the time you decided you should leave, the sun was already starting to set. You gaped at the time on your phone, shocked that you’d been out all day. Gathering your things you bid farewell to Han and your friends, and hurried back to your dorm.

Once back inside, you pondered your encounter with Han. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t find him extremely good-looking, and you were secretly hoping he’d feel the same. You’d never really believed in love at first sight, but there was no denying the instant attraction you felt when you made eye contact with him. It was worth pursuing at least, especially with your parents’ visit looming ever closer.

By the end of the following week you had exchanged numbers with Han, and hope was growing within you that maybe he felt something for you too. Having a boyfriend in time for your parents’ arrival was the last thought on your mind now, 90% of your brain was taken up with Han and how you felt about him.

One day you woke up feeling rather bold, and decided to just get it over with. Shooting him a quick text revealed he was free, and so you asked him to meet you at the wishing fountain near the coffee shop. He arrived there mere seconds after you did, curiosity written all over his face.

“Hey Y/N! Your text seemed kind of urgent, is everything okay?”

You nodded briefly. “Yeah, mostly. However, there is something I wanted to ask you.”

“Oh? Ask away then.”

Taking a deep breath, you blurted it out before you lost your nerve. “I really like you and I was wondering if it was at all possible that you like me too.”

Something akin to relief flashed across Han’s features, then he took your hands in his and held them tight. “I’ve been trying to work up the courage to ask you this very same question, but it seems you’ve beaten me to it.” Looking you right in the eyes he added, “Yes, I like you Y/N; so, so much. From the very moment we ran into each other you have been almost the only thing I’ve thought about.”

You blushed, feeling suddenly like a teenager speaking with her crush. “I’ve been the same way.” You admitted, which made Han smile brightly.

Leaning forward a little you caught his eyes and asked softly, “Can you kiss me?”

“I thought you’d never ask.” He remarked cheekily.

You smacked his arm playfully and he chuckled, pulling you close and covered your lips with his own. Fireworks exploded behind your closed eyes as your heart rate picked up, and you gripped his shoulders in an effort to ground yourself.

You parted after a moment, both of you breathing a little harder.

“That was…breathtaking.” Han murmured, hands coming up to gently cup your face.

“You took the words right out of my mouth.” You replied with a smile.

After that the rest of the week became a bit of a blur, most of your time spent either with Han or packing for the trip to the family cabin where you’d spend Christmas with your parents. You’d expected Han to go back and spend the holidays with his own family, but he insisted they wouldn’t mind if he went with you this time. So you soon found yourself driving those all-too-familiar roads while Han sat in the passenger seat and kept you company.

Upon arriving at the family cabin, you were surprised to find that your parents weren’t already there. Usually they would get there early to make sure the place was nice and cosy by the time you arrived, but this time they were nowhere in sight. Once you and Han carried all the luggage in you checked the answering machine to see if your parents had left a message. They had, and you played it immediately.

“Y/N sweetie, it’s your mother. We had a bit of an accident on the way here so we’re laid over for a few days until we can get the car repaired. Don’t worry about us, we’re both fine. You just have fun with your boyfriend and we’ll see you in a couple days!”

You turned off the machine and looked at Han. “Well, looks like we have the place to ourselves for a few days. What should we do?”

Han thought for a few minutes, then said “I have a few ideas, but they’ll all have to wait until the morning.”

You glanced at the time. “It is pretty late, I’ll fix us something for dinner and we can start our adventure in the morning.”

Han agreed to this and you set about fixing a quick meal of bibimbap, which he declared was the best he’d ever had. The two of you washed the dishes together, then retired to your room, where you unpacked and got ready for bed.

When you woke up in the morning it was freezing. Confused and more than a little concerned, you woke Han and together you made your way to the living room to look out the big picture window. To your utter chagrin, you saw that there’d been a massive snowstorm overnight and there was a thick layer of the stuff that reached halfway up said window.

“Seems we’re snowed in for the foreseeable future.” You grumbled, rubbing your arms vigorously to keep them warm.

“Hey, it’s not all bad.” Han stated as he came up behind you, engulfing you in his warmth as he wrapped his arms around you. “I can think of a few things we can still do.”

You looked up at him, curious. “Oh yeah? Like what?”

“Like…make breakfast together.”

You giggled and let him pull you towards the kitchen. “That sounds like a good place to start.”

Han, as it turned out, should not be allowed anywhere near a kitchen; a fact you only discovered after he put too much molasses in the cookies, dropped the jar trying to put some back, slipped on the sticky floor and pulled you down with him as the bowl of dry ingredients was dumped all over the both of you.

Sitting on the floor covered in multiple white powders with several sticky patches all over, you turned to a sheepish Han and gave him a playful glare. “You are banished forthwith from the kitchen, under pain of death.”

Han rubbed his neck, embarrassed. Then a look full of mischief came onto his face and he yanked his shirt off in one smooth motion, reaching over to do the same with yours. Before you could react or even open your mouth to complain, he had snatched you up and tossed you over his shoulder, all but running to your shared bedroom. You were dumped unceremoniously onto the slightly cool duvet, goosebumps popping up all over your skin at the contrast in temperature.

Looking up revealed Han hovering over you, eyes dark as he gazed down at you. A shock of arousal raced to your core, and you returned his gaze with rapidly growing want while quickly shucking off your sweatpants.

“You look so pretty laid out like this, baby.” He rasped, running his hands over the blue lace of your bra and panties.

“Wore them just for you.” You breathed, feeling your body heat up even more as he slipped his fingers under the waistband of your panties. “They’re an early C-Christmas present.”

“How thoughtful of you, baby. Now you just lay back and let me unwrap my present.”

The panties came off in one swift yank; then he hooked your legs over his shoulders and slid his tongue into your wet folds, eating you out like a man starved.

“Oh G-God, feels s-so good Han, please don't stop!”

His nose pressed against your clit as he continued his ministrations, bringing you to the edge three or four times but never letting you cum.

You were an overstimulated mess by this point, pitifully begging for your orgasm as if your life depended on it.

“Look at you baby, already going dumb and I haven't even fucked you yet. If you hold it till I finish, then I'll let you cum. Can you do that for me?”

“Yes, I can do it, I promise. Just please, please fuck me!” You babbled, mind blank aside from the overwhelming need for release.

“As you wish, my love.” He replied, making short work of his own pants and underwear before hovering over you once more, filling you to the hilt in one quick thrust that punched a sob of pure pleasure from your lungs, fingers wrapping the duvet in a death grip as you fought to hold back your orgasm.

Han set a rough pace, pounding into you with an urgency that belied his own imminent high. The sounds of squelching and slapping skin filled the room, the air permeated with the smell of sex and sweat. It made for a heady mixture of sensations that had your eyes rolling back as his thrusts grew faster, until finally he slammed into you one final time. Lips brushed your ear as he spoke the words you'd been waiting for: “Come for me baby.”

You let go, the world washing white as your limbs went stiff and liquid bliss flooded your veins, a hoarse scream ripping from your throat as your climax crashed over you. After a few moments that felt like forever, you began to come down, the white quickly replaced with black as you fully passed out.

You came to and found Han cleaning both of you as well as the duvet, a relieved smile appearing when he saw that you were awake. “Hey baby.” He murmured, kissing your forehead. “How do you feel?”

“Like I've been fucked into next year.” You whispered, voice almost completely gone. Han chuckled and pulled you under the duvet with him, wrapping around you to help keep you warm.

“Merry Christmas, my sweet Y/N.” He breathed, caressing your cheek.

“Merry Christmas to you too, my handsome Hannie.”

[mysticmunson]

Here’s an idea for a story that has been stuck in my head!

So eddie and the reader have been long childhood friends and they gained a crush on him but never said anything. Eddie started dating someone else and the reader is like not really jealous but heartbroken but never shows it and is still close to eddie. the reader and eddie get high and talk about feelings and the reader is like “it hurts” and eddie’s like “what does?” “loving someone you can’t be with”

Sorry if i have a shit explanation i’m like really bad at it💀 you can chose the ending!

sorry this is such a late response my dear! i hope u enjoy :) also in this, eddie and reader are in the same grade, reader is held back too so theyre the same age :)

also my requests are open, i just have a pea brain and don't always remember to write lol

"what did you just say?" eddie said through a puff of smoke, lounging on his bed against the creasing pillows. flicking off the ash into his tray, his red eyes look into your equally colored ones, taking the blunt into your own hand.

"huh?" you coughed, hoping that maybe high eddie would ignore your slip up of words. sitting at the end of his bed with your legs bent and crossed, you took a long hit before exhaling slowly.

today had been peculiar, eddie had been spacey all week, even as the topic of the new campaign arose. he barely spoke to anyone, even you and dustin, brushing past to get from one place to another. you fully expected to go home, a little disappointed, but he signaled you to his van like he did every week.

the ritualistic smoke sesh had been a friday tradition since freshman year, listening to music and eating pizza. it was one of the only times you saw eddie after he got together with rina, a new student at school who knew how to play dnd.

while rina had been polite, it was absolute torture to hear about her all the time, especially since your crush on eddie had only blossomed with time. she wasn't overly nice or mean, she just seemed like a dud, the complete opposite of eddie.

"what did you say, kid?" he questioned, the affectionate nickname ironic since you were only months apart. he took back the weed and took an even bigger hit, watching his body deflate as it calmed.

"i just said i don't know if i'll find love, don't need to get deep about it." you grumbled, fiddling with your ankle bracelet beneath the cuff of your jeans.

"ah, c'mon, where's my hopeless romantic at?" he joked, smiling wide, but the teasing hurt more.

you were longing for a relationship, to be held and appreciated, just to have someone whose chest got a little tight even thinking about you.

"it hurts too much, eds." you sigh, laying on your back with your head hanging off the bed, looking at his upside-down mess. the bed shifted as he mimicked your position, setting down the finished blunt.

"what does?" he lightly chuckles, his euphoric state making it hard for him to decipher the tone of your words. his doe eyes looked more innocent now, softly glazed over as his pink lips parted just a bit.

you wished you could kiss him, to show every emotion you felt constantly overwhelming you when he was around. it wasn't fair to like someone for so long, just to be taken by someone who hadn't even known him a month.

"it hurts to love someone you can't be with," you said with eyes closed, trying your best to seem relaxed, "it ends the same. they don't reciprocate and i get heartbroken, i'm too tired."

"i get it, it fucking sucks," he began, making your eyes open, "but you never know. i'm sure that dude from your science class likes you based on what you say about him."

the imaginary boy from science class that you made up to make it seem like you weren't hopelessly fawning over eddie. your face heated from embarrassment looked at him astounded.

"at least you have rina!" you blurted, sitting back up with him following in the same motion.

his cheeks grew a crimson color as he looked down at his rings, fiddling with them. the guilt began to sprout, he was just trying to be nice and you snapped at him.

"had rina." he emphasizes, "we broke up a few days ago."

"oh, shit i'm sorry eds." you consoled, putting your hand on the top of his back, and rubbing it gently. he pinched the bridge of his nose, brows crinkling together as he sat in thought.

"it's cool, it was mutual, just wasn't working out." he responded dryly, shrugging his shoulder as he looked at you.

while the conversation moved on to happier things, the night going like normal, there was a gnawing feeling at the back of eddie's head. he had fucked up, majorly, which only intensified as the sesh persisted.

he knew he liked you, feeling too guilty to string rina along, even though he did think she was pretty and nice. but it wasn't you. and as you sat in sweatpants with a can of beer, he knew he didn't want to be anywhere else.

he just wishes he knew how to tell you.

[guess-my-next-obsession]

Meet Me In The Hallway, Chapter Six:

pairing: frankie morales x ofc (Dylan Jones)

rating: E (18+ ONLY, minor angst, alcohol consumption, fingering, oral (f rec), unprotected piv, sub!frankie if you squint)

wc: 6.8k

series masterlist | frankie masterlist

It was Labor Day, and also Frankie’s last free day before starting his piloting job at the airline. The sun decided to shine extra bright, as if it knew it needed to in order to lift Dylan and Rina’s spirit, the looming cloud of Frankie’s weeklong absence forcing them into gray moods.

Frankie stood outside with Will and Santi as they prepared the backyard for the barbecue they were hosting later on. Santi was on grill cleaning duty while Frankie and Will retrieved the plastic folding tables from the shed and set them up on the grass before doing the same with the chairs. Dylan busied herself inside the house with Rina, the two of them making a game out of cleaning up the living room while Lennon, Benny, and Imelda got to work prepping the food.

As Dylan chased Rina around the sectional, the sound of her laughter filling the home along with the playful bickering coming from the kitchen, she caught a glimpse of her roommate-turned-friend-turned-lover through the sliding glass patio door, forcing her to freeze in place.

Frankie had his back turned, his khaki colored t-shirt clinging to his broad shoulders as he stood with his weight shifted onto one hip. There was a broad stripe of sweat darkening the fabric down the length of his spine, and try as she might, she couldn’t help but daydream about what he’d look like if he took it off. She imagined the sun on his brown skin, the way the beads of sweat would slowly trickle down his back, melting away into the waistband of his gray house shorts that she was sure he wore just to torment her.

She must have been lost in her daydreams too long given the way Rina called her name, pulling her eyes from the scene outside to meet her small, unimpressed face.

“I’m supposed to chase you,” she said, offering a not-so friendly reminder of the game that was supposed to be at hand.

“I’m feeling a little tired, Ri,” Dylan lied, desperate to get outside and touch Frankie to make sure he was actually there, looking like that. “How about we take a break and then we can play some more?”

“You’re like daddy,” she said, seemingly accepting the proposal with a ladened sigh.

“What do you mean?” Dylan laughed.

“He’s old and his back hurts so he doesn’t play long either,” she replied. “You’re old too.”

“Not as old as him,” Dylan retorted with a sassy bob of her head. “He’s like a hundred.”

“Really?” she asked, wide eyed. Dylan nodded, forcing her amusement to hide away as she scrunched her nose up in mock disgust.

“Yeah,” she said, gesturing at the sliding door. “Do you want to go give him a bottle of water with me? Since he’s so old and tired.”

“Yeah, that’s smart,” she agreed. Dylan watched Rina run off to the kitchen and grab a bottle of water from the fridge before skipping out in front of her through the now open patio door, the sound pulling Frankie’s attention from Santi and Will’s bickering. Turning around to greet his daughter with a smile, his eyes flickered up to Dylan’s for a moment, turning her knees into pudding as she watched him scoop his daughter up onto his hip.

“What’s this for, mi vida?” he asked, plucking the water bottle she was holding out for him out of her hands before planting a sweet peck on her temple.

“‘Cause you’re old and tired,” she said, repeating Dylan’s words from minutes ago. Frankie gasped at the unintentional ribbing, turning his eyes to Dylan who stood by the patio door watching the two of them exist together.

“You have anything to do with this?” he asked, a smirk growing on his face as she looked at him like he was something to devour. When she didn’t reply, her eyes locked on the way he was filling out his t-shirt, he let out a small laugh and shook his head. “You’re staring.”

“No, I’m not,” she defended, high pitched and guilty. “And even if I was, it would be rude to point it out.”

“My eyes are up here,” he continued his teasing, amused by the flush of pink that burned on her cheeks.

“You’re full of yourself,” she said, rolling her eyes as she tried to tame her smile. “Maybe that’s why I had Rina knock you down a size or two.”

“Partners in crime, huh?” he asked his daughter, bouncing her as he held her before setting her down.

“Daddy, what’s it like being a hundred?”

Frankie chuckled and looked to Dylan again, her smirk wide as she looked on in pride at the monster she created.

“I’m not a hundred,” he said. “Feels like it, though.”

“I’m only five,” she said proudly.

“Six next month,” he added. “Growing up on me.”

“I don’t wanna be a grown up,” she frowned. “I wanna play and play and play and never get tired.”

“You don’t have to grow up until you want to, baby,” he said, brushing her curls out of her face. “Look at Uncle Benny. He still hasn’t grown up.”

“That’s true!” she chimed, her eyes locking on the play set across the yard. “Can I go play, daddy?”

“Yeah, just don’t mess with the tables or anything, baby.” Rina nodded in confirmation before darting off towards the playground set, leaving Frankie and Dylan behind to watch.

“So,” Santi walked over from the grass, a shit-eating smirk on his face as he eyed the two of them standing so close that they may as well have had their hands all over one another. “Things going well?”

“Pope,” Frankie warned.

“I think they’re going alright,” Dylan answered the question anyways, drawing Frankie’s stare to her profile as she stood beside him. “He’s starting to develop a little ego, though.”

“That right, Fish? We’re not busting your balls enough, or what?” Santi asked.

“Oh, you’re doing a fine job at that, don’t worry,” Frankie replied dryly.

“Maybe it’s your fault then, Dyl,” Santi suggested. “With all that staring—“

“I don’t stare,” she defended herself again, swatting Frankie on the arm as he gave her a proud grin.

“Right,” Frankie drawled out, nodding in feigned agreement. He waited until Santi went into the house, keeping his eyes forward to watch as Rina forces Will into pushing her on the swing, to lean over and whisper in Dylan’s ear. “We’re all alone. You can admit it now, baby.”

She wore a smirk as she turned her head to look up at him, his eyes falling to her lips instantly.

“Look who’s staring now,” she said, bumping her hip against his.

“I am,” he nodded. “No shame.”

“When’s Rina’s nap again?” she asked, her tone laced with suggestion.

Frankie checked his watch before shrugging, feigning casualness. “An hour or so. Why?”

“You know why,” she said, playfully rolling her eyes at him.

“I’m not good at reading between the lines, baby.”

“You’re dressed like a whore, you know? The gray shorts, the sweat. It’s enough to drive a woman mad.”

“The sweat?” he chuckled. “I’m gross. And probably stinky. Maybe you shouldn’t stand too close.”

Dylan ignored his suggestion as he moved to step away, her body following his.

“I can’t believe yard work and sweat is doing it for you,” he laughed. Dylan bit her lip as her eyes followed the line of sweat trailing from his sternum down his stomach. “You look like you’re gonna tackle me.”

“I might,” she replied, flashing a smile at him. Frankie chuckled again and looked away from her for his own sake.

“I’ll try to have Rina down soon so I can come pay you a visit,” he said, reaching his hand down to rub her lower back, feeling her lean into his side. “Gonna be a tough week. No sneaking over to your bedroom.”

“Don’t remind me,” she sighed. “Have to worry about you finding true love in London.”

“True love’s gonna have to find me because I won’t be looking,” he said. “Gonna be too busy thinking about you and Rina having fun without me.”

“I did promise her she could come bake with me again,” she said. “That is if your conveniently gorgeous, twenty-four year old nanny lets us.”

“She was the only one who Rina liked,” he reminded, though the thought of the beautiful woman taking care of Frankie’s child filled Dylan with jealousy. “May I remind you she’s only around when I’m not. Kinda hard to fall in love if I’m never around her.”

“So you admit she’s gorgeous?” Dylan smirked at him, earning an eye roll.

“Not like you,” he replied. “The woman that’s given me an ego problem simply by acknowledging me.”

“I’m gonna miss your ego,” she said, sincerity flowing freely in her words, earning an adoring pout.

“I’m gonna miss you, too,” he said. “Hate that I’m not going to be here.”

Dylan wrapped her arm around his waist and gave him a squeeze before letting her palm smooth over his side comfortingly.

“It’s gonna be alright,” she offered, her voice soft, as if she was still struggling to believe it herself. “At least the homecoming sex is gonna be insane.”

Frankie laughed and pulled her in tighter before leaning over to kiss her temple when Rina wasn’t looking. “God, I’m into you.”

“Hey,” Santi poked his head out of the crack in the sliding glass door, forcing the couple away from each other as they turned around to look at him. “We forgot to get buns and ice. Can you two make a store run? I’ll watch the monster.”

“Yeah,” Dylan nodded, eager for a moment alone with Frankie.

“She needs to go down for a nap soon so she’s not cranky when everyone shows up,” Frankie instructed as he followed Dylan inside the house. “I’m gonna change really quick.”

“I’ll be in the car,” she called out as she grabbed her keys and slid her sandals on before heading out through the front door, her hands already itching in anticipation.

Sitting in the driver’s seat, she busied her eager hands on the steering wheel, tapping them against it to the beat of the radio, her lip caught between her teeth as she watched the front door until Frankie emerged. He changed into a white t-shirt and jeans, the sight of his frame stirring a primal want in her to rip them off his body right here in this drive way.

“Hope I didn’t take too lon—“ Frankie was interrupted as he climbed into the passenger seat, Dylan’s hands tugging him over the center console so that she could kiss him, deep and lingering, as if she was attempting to get her fill and failing at it. Frankie smiled against her lips, his hands bracketing both sides of her face as he moved with her, just as desperate to sear the feeling of her lips against his into his mind.

“Fuck,” she panted as she pulled back, blushing at her own neediness. “Sorry. You just look so good today, it’s turning me feral.”

“I can tell,” he chuckled, his hand still resting on her jaw, his thumb smoothing over her cheek. “Fuck, you’re beautiful.”

“Okay, stop looking at me like that so I can drive.” Frankie laughed and shook his head.

“You’re gonna have to figure out a way to focus because I can’t look at you any other way than this,” he said, forcing a bashful grin onto her face as she pulled out of the driveway and onto the road.

“So,” she said, trying to distract herself from the throbbing ache between her thighs brought on by his hand resting on her leg. “Do you get free time when you’re flying somewhere?”

“Depends on where I’m going and how long I’m there, but for this one I’m probably going to have too much free time on my hands,” he replied. “But I’m just gonna hang out in my hotel and at the airport.”

“You’re gonna be in London for five days,” she said, glancing over at him. “Why not go out and live a little?”

“Because I’m an introvert,” he said, chuckling. “And the weather’s supposed to be fucking miserable all week. I’ll probably go out and find Rina some souvenirs, but aside from that…no intentions on socializing.”

Dylan nodded, trying to hide her joy over the fact that she wouldn’t have to worry about some English woman coming and stealing his heart away from her.

“What about you?” he asked, tapping her thigh with his hand. “Got anything planned? Friends,…dates?”

She shot him an amused look before rolling her eyes.

“No plans. Definitely no dates.” A beat of silence passed over them before Dylan gathered the courage to speak again. “Listen, I know it’s still new and everything, and we haven’t really had the monogamy talk—“

“I want to be exclusive,” Frankie blurted out, pulling her eyes to his as they reached a red light. “With each other, I mean. I don’t…want to see anyone else.”

Dylan leaned over to quickly kiss him, wishing that she had more time to make him feel the so far unexpressed love she has for him.

“I don’t want to see anyone else either,” she agreed.

“So…does this make me your boyfriend?” he asked, shy and boyish.

“As long as it makes me your girlfriend.” His smile grew wide at the title, his head nodding in confirmation.

“My girlfriend,” he chuckled. “Fucking insane.”

“Which part?”

“The part where you’re actually into me.” Dylan laughed and reached her hand down to squeeze his as it rested on her thigh.

“I’m more than into you, Frankito.” Frankie raised an eyebrow at her. “There’s that ego I love so much.”

“All your fault.”

•••

The afternoon went by faster than Dylan and Frankie would’ve liked. Rina woke up from her nap twenty minutes early, her little fist knocking on Dylan’s door only once before letting herself in, forcing Frankie to scramble and cover their naked bodies with the comforter. A frustrated command for her to go back to bed left Frankie’s lips, his daughter obeying with a whine as she closed the door shut on her way out.

“Fuck,” he sighed, covering his face with his hands. “Since when does she just open doors?”

“To be fair, she didn’t know what we were doing,” Dylan offered, reaching her hand over to rub his back.

“What we were about to do,” he corrected, resting his hand on her hip before sliding it down her thigh. “Barely got started.”

“We’ll have to wait until tonight,” she frowned at him, reaching to pinch his chin between her fingers. “I think I hear people showing up.”

Frankie stilled himself to listen closely, the sound of greetings from the entryway and Santi’s loud cousins creeping in through the closed door and walls.

“Fuck,” he whined and Dylan smiled, wondering if he had any clue how much it resembled Rina’s. “Gonna have to watch Santi’s cousins try to talk to you all night.”

“No you don’t,” she laughed. “I’m your girlfriend, remember?”

“They don’t know that,” he retorted. “Shit, our roommates don’t even know that.”

“So let’s tell them,” she shrugged. “I’ll just introduce myself as your girlfriend. That’s what Imelda, Lennon, and Cass do, even though they all pretty much live here.”

Frankie couldn’t control his smitten grin at the casualness in her voice, as though it was always meant to be like this.

“Alright,” he looked at her with a wide smile, his eyes lidded with affection as he nodded. “Glad we have that settled, then.”

Dylan grinned back at him just as cheesily as she leaned over to kiss him before tapping him on the leg.

“Go get your baby girl, she’s probably not very happy with you,” she said.

“I know,” he sighed, angry at himself for snapping at her. “I’m sensing a late night ice cream run in my near future.”

“Count me in.”

Frankie pecked her lips one more time before climbing out of bed, Dylan following shortly behind. They tugged on their clothes as quickly as they could manage before making their exit into the now empty house, the party seemingly making its way to the backyard.

While Frankie apologized his way out of trouble, promising ice cream just as a cherry on top, Dylan fixed her appearance so that it didn’t look like she’d just been in a very heated makeout before changing quickly into a sundress, hoping that her lack of makeup would go unnoticed if she was dressed well enough.

Meeting Frankie and Rina out in the hallway, she was shocked to find the five year old giving her the cold shoulder as they made their way into the backyard.

“She thought you were hurting me,” Frankie whispered in her ear as he slid the patio door open.

“She thought that I was hurting you?” Dylan gave him a confused look before laughing. “You were on top of me.”

“You know, now that I think about it…” He clutched his lower back and faked a groan of pain, earning a swat to his stomach. Frankie laughed and wrapped his arm around her shoulder, squeezing her close and kissing her forehead. “Don’t worry, once she gets some ice cream in her system it’ll be water under the bridge.”

As Rina ran straight to Santi and Imelda, allowing her uncle to lift her up to sit on his shoulders, Frankie and Dylan made their way over to the table where Santi’s cousins sat with Benny and Will, Frankie’s arm never leaving Dylan’s waist as they walked.

“PDA?” Benny asked. “Does this mean—“

“Hey, I’m Luis.” The best looking of the cousins stood up and held his hand out for Dylan’s, a charming smile on his face as he eyed her. Frankie’s arm left Dylan’s waist to accept the handshake on her behalf, making her smirk at his jealous streak. “Lo siento, Frankie,” he breathed out a chuckle. “Santi told me you found yourself a novia, pero—”

“You’re good,” Frankie assured, turning to Dylan and seeing her smirk. “This is my girlfriend,” he couldn’t help but smile at the sound of the word coming from his lips.

“Dylan,” she added, reaching her hand over to shake Luis’s. “You’re Santi’s cousin?”

“Yeah, yeah,” he nodded, taming the flortiness in his smile and voice now that he knew she was off limits. He turned to the table and rested his hand on the shoulder of the guy sitting beside him. “This is my brother, Berto.”

“Nice to meet you,” Dylan smiled at him and shook his hand before looking across the table at the three men that looked continuing to do the same with each of the men at the table while Frankie walked off towards the grill where Santi was calling for him, leaving her alone to deal with Benny and Will’s shit eating smiles.

“Girlfriend?” Benny teased her as she came to sit beside him. “Since when?”

“Since today,” she replied, shrugging her shoulders nonchalantly, but her smile gave her away. Benny nudged her shoulder with his just to tease her even more before offering his congratulations.

“Frankie’s already guarding you like a watchdog,” Will said, pointing across the yard to Frankie who stood watch over the grill while Santi went inside the house, his eyes locked on Dylan rather than the meat cooking.

“You said you and Frankie just got together today?” Luis asked, punctuating his question with a sip of his beer.

“Well,” Dylan started, tilting her head back and forth in consideration. “We’ve been friends for a few months.”

“Until Frankie finally made a move,” Benny added. “Now look at ‘em.”

Will pointed at Frankie again as he started to come back over. “Guard dog is back.”

“What are you idiots talking about?” Frankie asked, pointing his question at Will and Benny.

“Wouldn’t you like to know,” Benny taunted. Dylan rolled her eyes and chuckled as she stood up and walked away to grab a beer from the cooler, Frankie following in tow.

“There’s too many men at this party,” she commented lowly to him as she cracked the top off. “Where’s Len?”

“I think she’s picking up some of her friends,” he said, walking with her over to the grill.

“Daddy!” Rina came over, ignoring Dylan completely as she tugged on her father’s shirt.

“Yes, baby?”

“Can I have a soda?” She used her round, brown eyes on him, batting her lashes until he had no choice but to say yes.

“Si, pero sólo uno,” he said, trying to sound firm as she ran off to the cooler with a squeal. Turning back to Dylan, he watched as she tipped her beer back, a droplet of the golden liquid slipping from the corner of her lips down to her neck only to be wiped away before it could reach her cleavage. Lifting his eyes back to hers, he found her smirking at him. “Told you somebody’d try to steal you from me.”

“And look how that turned out for him,” she countered, reaching to slide her hand across the small of his back to hold his hip. “Where’s Cass?” Frankie winced as he looked at her, earning a squeeze to his hip. “What? What happened?”

“Don’t say anything,” he warned, and Dylan nodded her head eagerly in agreement. “Will broke off the engagement.”

“What?” she whisper-yelled.

“Yeah,” he nodded. “Got tired of the fighting and her parents, I guess. He told me this morning.”

“Oh my god,” she shook her head in disbelief. “He seems so normal.”

“I think it’s been a long time coming,” he said. “I never really thought they’d make it, but Will’s a creature of habit and they’ve been together forever. I think he forgot that he still had a choice.”

“Well, in that case, maybe Len is gonna bring someone that he can have a meaningless fling with,” she said, making Frankie chuckle.

“You’re gonna have to get him plastered if you want him to socialize.” Dylan gave him a mischievous grin and flickered her eyebrows before turning to walk to the cooler. “Don’t go getting yourself into something you can’t handle, bebita.”

“I’m a pro,” she assured, lifting the chilled bottle of tequila out of the cooler. “You gonna come have some fun?”

“I have to watch the grill,” he said, earning an exaggerated frown. Frankie shook his head and chuckled at the power she held over him, the power he’d continue to hand over for the rest of his life if she’d let him. “Can’t say no when you look at me like that. Give me a second to find Santi.”

•••

It was well into the evening, the party having passed its peak. Lennon did end up bringing a few eligible bachelorettes for Will to choose from, and thanks to their game of quarters and King’s Cup, he was loosened up enough to initiate conversation with one of them.

Dylan’s inhibitions were released as well, the tequila lighting her up inside with a near feral desire to pounce on Frankie as she watched him dance with Rina in the middle of the grass, spinning her around his finger underneath the string lights that hung overhead. She thanked the heavens when she saw the little girl yawn and point to the house, knowing that if she had to wait any longer to have Frankie alone, she might start pulling her hair out.

“Gonna give her a bath and put her to bed,” he whispered in Dylan’s ear as he reached her at the patio table, Rina already half asleep on his hip. Dylan bit her lip and gave him a smile that she hoped conveyed her desire, but only received a kiss on the cheek in response.

“Dyl!” Lennon called for her sister as she watched Frankie walk into the house, pulling her glassy, red eyes to hers. “Come have another drink.”

“I can’t,” she croaked, walking over to the table that held the remaining guests: Benny, Lennon, Santi, Imelda, Will, and Lennon’s friend, Skye. “I have plans for tonight, and I think throwing up would probably kill the vibe.”

“Ew,” Lennon gagged while Benny laughed.

“So you two are doin’ it?” Santi asked, his eyes just as glossy as Dylan’s. She laughed and nodded, sitting down beside him. “Is it as bad as we all assume?”

“What makes you think it’s bad?” she asked, looking to her sister for answers.

“Frankie just—” Benny shrugged. “He just seems like he’s a lazy lover. I can’t imagine him being very athletic.”

“First off, sex doesn’t have to be athletic to be good,” Dylan countered. “Secondly, why is everybody thinking about my sex life?”

“Not about your sex life,” Imelda corrected. “You and Frankie’s sex life.”

“Well, it’s good. It’s better than good.” Santi gave her a skeptical look before tipping his beer back. Dylan laughed and swatted his arm. “It is!”

“Whatever you say,” he teased. “I guess they must call him catfish for a reason.”

“Oh god,” Dylan rolled her eyes and chuckled as she stood up. “Well, on that note, I’m gonna be going to bed. I’ll see you drunkards in the morning.”

“Give Frankie’s ass a kiss for me!” Santi called.

“I thought you like to do that yourself?” she called back.

•••

It was nearly an hour before Frankie made it into Dylan’s bedroom with a yawn, finding her sitting on her bed, planning out the next month’s menu.

“Sorry it took so long,” he rasped as he sluggishly climbed onto the bed beside her. “Her tantrums are getting so bad. I don’t know what to do.”

Dylan frowned at him and set her notebook down before straddling his lap. Frankie looked up at her from where his head was laying on the pillow, his eyes tired and red.

“I don’t know, either,” she said. “Is it me? Us?”

“I don’t know,” he shrugged, resting his hands on her hips. “I don’t think so. She loves you.”

“Yeah, but maybe she doesn’t love the fact that your attention is divided now,” she said, watching her hands as they smoothed up and down his cotton-clothed chest.

“I don’t feel like I’m neglecting her,” he said, frowning a bit. “Am I?”

“I don’t think so,” she said. “But she hasn’t lived with you full-time in years, right? Maybe she’s just scared of you going away again.”

“Which is exactly what I signed up to do,” he sighed, lifting his hands to his face to rake over them. “I don’t know what to fucking do besides quit.”

“Are you sure?” Dylan asked, trying to hide her selfish hope over the prospect of Frankie choosing a different career that didn’t send him away for the majority of the week.

“I can’t think of any other solution,” he said. “I just don’t know what I’d do.”

“You can work for me,” she said, shrugging and offering him a smile. “My first full-time employee.”

“Baby,” he chuckled. “I’m not a baker.”

“No, but you’re good at a lot of things. You can cashier and do maintenance and help me with my books and stuff. I’ll make sure you’re busy, and I can pay you minimum wage plus tips for now, more if things continue to go well for the store.”

“You’re being serious?” he asked, a half-smile on his face as he studied her. “Are you still drunk?”

“Tipsy,” she corrected. “But no, I’m dead serious. Work for me while you figure things out.”

Frankie rolled her over onto her back and rested on top of her, grinning at her as his hand slid up the curve of her side until it was sliding underneath the cotton of her tank top to drag it up with him. Lifting the fabric over her chest, he lowered his mouth to kiss the swell of her breast delicately.

“You don’t need to interview me first?” he husked, trailing his lips to the opposite breast to give it the same attention. “Make sure I’m the right fit?”

“Well,” she smiled and combed his hair back as he captured her nipple between his lips. “Maybe you’re right. Maybe I need to see what you can do.”

“Anything you ask,” he rasped, placing a kiss to her sternum before looking into her eyes. “I’ll do it.”

“Guess my first question would be: are you good with your hands?” she asked, smirking at him as he grinned from ear to ear.

“I’d say so,” he replied, sliding the hand that wasn’t propping him up down her side to play with the scalloped waistline of her boyshorts. “Would you like a demonstration?”

Dylan bit her lip and nodded, already feeling her pulse thump between her thighs as his hand moved to her mound.

“Can you follow orders?” she asked next, watching as his eyes turned a couple shades darker.

“I’ll follow any order you give me,” he whispered. “Tell me what to do, baby. Tell me what you want.”

“I want you to make me cum with just your fingers,” she purred, loving the way his hand trembled against her as it dipped beneath the thin cotton of her panties. ”Then, if you do a good job, I’d like to see how good you are with this.” She ran her thumb along his bottom lip. Frankie smirked as he stuck his tongue out and swiped it across the pad of her thumb before moving down the bed to shuck her underwear off her legs.

“God—“ Frankie sat back on his knees and watched as she spread her thighs for him, showing him just how badly she’d been wanting him all day long. “Pussy’s so fucking pretty, baby. Wanna taste you so bad.”

“You will,” she purred, curling her fingers at him to beckon him closer. “But first, I want to feel your fingers.”

“Anything you want, baby” he breathed. “I’m yours.”

Dylan’s breath hitched as Frankie’s lips pressed against her stomach at the same time his thumb pressed against her clit.

“Fuck,” she moaned, feeling her eyelids grow heavy with pleasure as he rubbed intentionally soft circles against her to ease her into what was to come, though with the way her walls were already clenching around nothing, she didn’t think he really needed to.

Frankie rested his head on her inner thigh, his eyes switching back and forth between focusing on the faces she was making and the way her pussy was leaking for him. Pressing a kiss to the crease of her thigh, he switched fingers to stroke up and down her slit to gather her arousal on his fingers, eliciting another moan when his fingertip dipped into her entrance. He lifted his eyes to hers as he rubbed circles into her clit again with more ease than before thanks to her slick drenching his fingers.

“Frankie,” she breathed out, reaching to rake her fingernails through his curls. “Inside.”

“You want my fingers inside you, baby?” he asked in a rasp, his lips pressing against her thigh again. “You want me to fuck you with them?”

“Yes,” she begged desperately, her fingers clenching his hair in her fist before giving it a gentle tug. Frankie moaned against her thigh, leaving a lovebite there before soothing it with a kiss. “Please, Frankie.”

“Love it when you sound like that,” he mumbled against her skin as he slid his fingers down to her entrance, shallowly pumping in. His eyes lifted to her face, watching as her brows furrowed together in pleasure and her lips parted, her breath stilling in anticipation. With a smile on his face, he pressed into her and curled his fingers upwards to find her favorite spot while his thumb pressed firmly into her clit.

“Fuck,” she moaned, her head falling back against the pillows. “Your fingers are so fucking good.”

“Just my fingers, baby?” he teased, pressing a kiss to her clit just to watch her buck her hips.

“Fuck, keep going,” she panted, lifting her head back up to watch him as he pumped his fingers into her with the sort of precision that made her wonder where he learned to please so well. “You make me cum so fast, fuck,” she giggled, feeling the knot in her stomach start to tighten with every stroke of his fingers. “You’re so fucking good, Frankie. I’m gonna cum—shit.”

“Come on, baby,” he urged, his voice husky and low with arousal as he watched her eyes flutter shut at the same time that her walls clenched around him. Wearing a proud grin, he smoothed his hand over her stomach and hip to soothe her through her climax, whispering sweet praises to her the entire time. “Did so fucking good, made such a mess. Can I clean you up, baby?”

Dylan was still reeling from her high as she nodded her head eagerly before remembering exactly how she wanted to do this earlier.

“Come lay up here,” she ordered in a breathy whisper. “Wanna try something.”

“Oh?” He raised an eyebrow and smirked at her before moving to obey her command, finding his spot on the bed beside her. Dylan was grinning just as widely as he was as she sat up and swung her leg over the breadth of his shoulders to straddle his face. Frankie licked his lips as he took in her pleasure-swollen center hovering over his mouth. “I fucking love this idea.”

“Tell me if you start to suffocate, okay? Would suck if you died.”

“I don’t know, dying like this sounds pretty nice,” he joked as he placed his hands on the top of her thighs to yank her down to his mouth, making her gasp with the tender swipe of his tongue against her still-sensitive bud.

“Shit,” she sighed, reaching to hold onto her headboard. “Go slow.”

Frankie didn’t say anything, simply choosing to nod his head underneath her weight as he continued circling her bud slowly until she grew needy for more and started to grind her hips against his tongue.

“You should win a fucking award for this,” she panted, looking down at him between her thighs. “You look so fucking good like this, baby.”

Frankie groaned beneath her and squeezed the tops of her thighs to pull her even closer. Dylan could feel it dawn again, the sight of him living for the taste of her forcing her closer and closer to the edge until she couldn’t hold it back anymore.

“God,” she cried, shaking on top of him as he worked her through it, swallowing down everything she had to give him until she was squirming away.

“Too much?” he asked, wiping his beard clean with a smile.

“I can’t even make my own self cum twice,” she panted. “How the fuck do you do it?”

Frankie chuckled before rolling over to rest between her thighs. “I was hoping for another one.”

“I don’t know if I can take another one,” she giggled, reaching to pet his face. “But I’m down to find out.”

Frankie grinned as he leaned down to kiss her slowly, letting her taste herself on his tongue before he was sitting up to tug his t-shirt off before standing up to do the same to his sweats and briefs. “How do you want me?”

Frankie scoffed and climbed back onto the bed to hover over her again. “I want you whatever way you want me. I’m lucky to even be here in your bed.”

“Okay, but let’s pretend you were calling the shots,” she smirked, lightly scratching her fingernails up and down his stomach. “How would you want me?”

“I don’t know,” he blushed. “I…I used to fantasize a lot about you riding me.”

“Yeah?” she bit her lip and smiled before gently shoving him so that he was flat on his back. Frankie’s dark pupils were blown as he watched her straddle his lap and grind her cunt against the underside of his cock. “Like this?”

“Fuck; yes,” he panted, groaning with every pass of her clit over the ridge of his reddened head. “Please, baby.”

“Please, what?” she teased, lifting her hips so that the tip of him would catch on her entrance.

“Please,” he moaned, gripping her hips. “Sit on it, baby.”

“Okay,” she smirked, but it was wiped away once she began to take him in deeper and deeper, inch by inch until she was sitting flush against the curls at the base of him. “So big, Frankie.”

“God,” he choked, letting his eyes close and head fall back against the pillows for a moment to catch his breath. “You look too fucking good like this.”

“You’re not even looking at me,” she laughed.

“I know, I can’t,” he chuckled, lifting his head and opening his eyes to find her still on top of him looking like a goddess; her golden skin covered in sweat, the teardrop shape of her breasts, the patchwork tattoos that took up most of the real estate on her left arm, her honey colored hair in long waves, her plump, pink lips, the amber of her irises. He shook his head and let his head fall flat again. “I’m going to cum too quick if I look at you.”

“I don’t care. Look at me,” she commanded, earning his obedience almost immediately. Frankie took a breath and lifted his head to watch as she lifted her hips before sinking back down, over and over, so slowly that he thought he was losing his mind. His hand shook as he left his hold on her hip to cup the weight of her breast, delighting in the moan he was able to pull from her. “Fuck, you’re perfect, Frankie.”

Her praise had his eyelids fluttering for a moment, coaxing him into some sort of sinful hynpnosis he never wanted to break free from.

“You feel so fucking good,” he groaned, sitting upright to hold her as she rocked her hips into his. His hands gripped the globes of her ass to guide her against him, the closeness of their bodies forcing her clit to grind against his base with every rock forward.

“Baby,” she whined, throwing her arms around his shoulders and hugging him tight. Frankie’s lips were pressed against her neck as he used every bit of patience and willpower left in him to get her to the finish line before him. “Cum with me, Frankie. I’m—fuck, please.”

“I’m with you, baby,” he whispered against her skin. “I’m gonna fill you up.”

“Please—oh, fuck,” she cried, tightening her hold on him as she came, the grip of her walls forcing him over the edge with her with a groan loud enough for everyone outside still drinking to hear.

“That was too fucking loud.” He laughed at himself as he wrapped his arms around her waist to hug her close. “Forgot it wasn’t just us for a second.”

“I know,” she giggled, lifting her head to give him a dopey smile before planting a kiss on his lips.

Frankie laid back against the pillows, taking Dylan with him and letting her rest on his chest with him still inside of her while he traced a line up and down her spine.

“Were you being serious about hiring me?” he asked after a few beats of peaceful silence. Dylan lifted her head to look at him, finding him already looking at her.

“Depends,” she said. “Were you being serious about staying?”

Frankie was silent for a beat, but smiled when he seemed to settle on a response.

“Yeah. I just…I can’t leave. I don’t wanna leave her.”

Dylan smoothed her hand over his chest and hugged him closer, a wave of comfort and security washing over her as she breathed in his scent.

“And you, too,” he continued, guiding her chin so that she was looking at him. “I don’t wanna leave you, either.”

Dylan gave him a sleepy smile as she sat up, resting her hands on his stomach as she looked down at him, desperate to speak the three words that had been playing on the tip of her tongue since the first night they shared together. Instead, she settled on something less terrifying and vulnerable, something to take the place of her consuming affection for him.

“I can’t wait to see you in an apron.”

Frankie laughed and rolled his eyes. “Do I really have to?”

“No, but it’s a personal demand,” she said, smirking at him. “I just love a man in uniform.”

“In that case, I only ask one thing.“ He rolled her over so that they were laying on their sides. “Can I get one with my name embroidered on it?”

•

•

[27emailsicantsend]

I just have a question to ask about Tim's IG post, "Not Canon (at this time)"? What does that even mean? Does that mean it'll be canon when spinoff is happening? Or...I am trying to figure out what he meant by that, haha. I think it's hint hint for a spinoff, am I right or is it something else that I might misinterpret it?

Oh I wanted to talk about this so thank you for sending!! For anyone who is curious, it was this post:

This is not the only hint he has made about a possible spin-off.

He’s said (I can’t go find all the direct quotes right now but I can give you what I can remember and I’ll post some pictures at the end):

-he’s wanted 5-7 seasons since the beginning

-he feels like the kids are graduating high school for now but the “next obvious place is college”

-he has brought up ideas to the network but nothing is official for now

-he has specifically mentioned Ricky and Gina and where THEY are going next (in the picture above and other interviews)

-he has a “surprise” for everyone after the show ends… which looked like something at East High but I haven’t seen the actual surprise. Unless he was talking about their Wicked song, but even then the picture of him mentioning the surprise didn’t look like the Wicked song set up… it looked different. (I’m so sorry I don’t have this picture but if anyone has it feel free to reblog with it!)

-he wanted the franchise to be “Degrassi”-esque with lots of spin-offs and seasons and such. It was never meant to end here.

Not to mention when Josh and Sofia were asked about a spin-off they just giggled and shrugged nervously but made jokes about it being a rina college spin off (the body language is suspicious and telling)

And the official HSMTMTS account (which I believe Tim has some control over) posted a really cryptic tweet/insta about how “happy endings are just the beginning”

HSMTMTS cast was invited to D23 I believe? This year which is only for announcing NEW things usually so it’s kind of weird to slot a show that’s ended?

I find the amount of promo we’re getting from Tim and the official HSMTMTS account is… bizarre for a show that just ended? Maybe we’d get stuff for a few days but they’ve been hammering it home like we’re getting a new season next week. I don’t really watch promo for a lot of other shows though, so this could be a normal amount.

We also know that the strike is impacting a LOT of things, including promotion or talks of new shows. Tim wouldn’t do a movie/show for this without his og cast on board, so I feel like they’re waiting for the strike to be over to start things.

All of this to say, I do think we’re getting more but the strike really halted any of that coming forth for now. But with how good the show did, the contract Tim just signed with Disney, and how we were really starting to get moment with these characters (not to mention views and $$$ it was bringing in for Disney), I would be SHOCKED if we didn’t get more.

Tim purposely ended the show where he did because he wanted it to end on a high note and close the “high school” chapter, but that doesn’t mean we can’t get another. I think Disney was probably ready to offer him a s5 but he didn’t want to risk it… with a new show, he can at least probably get 4 more seasons.

(don’t ask me what the hell is going on with bunk’d and their 7 seasons… I’m still trying to process that)

[youarentamaybeyoureayes]

here's my take on potential spin offs or any other reunions we could potentially get in the future that nobody asked for:

first and foremost, and i'm sorry if it sounds biased, but the #1 spin off that i'd want to see would be a spin off about kourtney's life at lewis college written/developed by nneka gerstle. the reason why i believe kourtney deserves a spin off the most is because not only was she only supposed to be a one episode character in the beginning, but as a black girl who also deals with anxiety among other things, she was one of the most relatable characters on the show to me—not to mention her talent is out of this world and a show completely devoted to her would be the perfect platform to showcase that without her having to spend her story in the background of someone else's bigger story. also, i don't think there's a black college show that also involves music in an important way that's on tv right now, and i just think the possibilities are endless for a show revolving around her.

the second spin off sounds more likely if tim had a say in things, but i could definitely see a spin off starring emmy as the lead with miss jenn, mr. mazzara, and dani in supporting roles along with new cast members. i also think it'd be the perfect opportunity to bring back alex as one of the new students since emmy was able to upgrade her role from season 3. admittedly, i don't see myself being as enthusiastic for this spin off because of my attachment to the original cast, but it could be cute to see them make appearances from time to time and also see if there would be any parallels from the past show. they wouldn't be able to do the same hsm format plot, which i guess would defeat the purpose or whatever. but even naming the show East High or just having it set in the same universe would be cool to me.

anyways the third and final option i'd watch is a full length movie with the original cast as a final farewell to the show. i am biased enough to admit that it'd be cool for it to be a rina wedding, but even a jennzara wedding would be entertaining. the plot could be literally anything and i'd just think it'd be cool to see the cast back together in something well written for the future.

k i'm done sorry if it was wordy, i literally have no other way of expressing my ideas lol

[gimmedamemes]

i dont think im gonna watch HSMTMTS season 4 :(

I cannot watch this. Maybe I’m a debby downer. Maybe I’m a negative nancy. Maybe I’m expecting too much realism from a TV show. However, no show has made me feel so  offended by the treatment of one character more than this one. 

My poor boy EJ was completely and totally DISCARDED by EVERYONE in the last season. He was juggling so many things such as college, his friends, his dad, and his girlfriend, and all he wanted was to enjoy his last summer as a kid by spending it with people he felt he could be the most comfortable around. 

Instead of that, however, he is suddenly and without warning pushed into being the director of a musical that he did not know anything about, while also being the pseudo-camp counselor because apparently, investing more than one adult into a summer camp is worth it to the Camp Shallow Lake owners. And yet, no one seems to acknowledge how unfair this is, not even EJ himself. 

All he does is push through and do his absolute BEST to make it happen. However, because he can’t adapt to this new role flawlessly and balance everything perfectly, to his fellow campers who are not dealing with anything of that nature (no, Carlos’ inability to climb a rock wall doesn’t count) he becomes a bad friend, a bad cousin, and a bad boyfriend. 

And due to the fact that he was too busy while running a show that he had no business running, to devote every second to his girlfriend, the final straw in their relationship is Gina’s discovery of a letter that was not her business at all. Perhaps his reason for hiding it was because of her reacting the way she did. We’ll never know, because EJ’s feelings were never given a first thought, much less a second and he was never able to explain. 

And thus, in the last half hour of the final episode, we get Ricky and Gina, who have decided that they’re each other’s one true love based on.... what again? Oh yeah, some chocolates she thought he gave her. And some other stuff too, I suppose, but that’s all it took for some to decide that they were a valid ship. 

Ricky who was HOPELESSLY devoted to another girl for 2 seasons straight, whose whole reason for being in the drama club was for her, for whose primary interactions with Gina were either because of her or about her, suddenly decides that Gina is the one he’s looking for ONLY after driving to said summer camp on a whim because his other girlfriend was discovered to be the saboteur we all knew she was. Shockingly (but, maybe not to some), Gina reciprocates. In the last few minutes of the last episode, Ricky and Gina kiss, not even 12 hours after Gina breaks it off with EJ for good. 

Now, what’s my problem with this? It’s so sloppy and unrealistic. Now, the show itself is unrealistic and as a theater kid myself, I can tell you that for sure. Our sets aren’t anywhere near as elaborate, we don’t have a strong supporting ensemble cast and overall, the whole concept of any school club having that much devotion is a serious stretch. But it’s done well. Or it was. N

Rini was a couple we were somewhat rooting for from the start. Portwell we grew to love because of the slow burn and the slow reveal of the couple’s true feelings for one another. Now, we are expected to believe that 2 seasons of solid Portwell build up (as well as the first half of season 3 before they began having problems) is just calmly thrown away and for what? For Rina? A subplot/sub-ship that was made possible by under 10 scenes together? Ricky, who was so devoted to Nini and promised never to let her go again and Gina who wasn’t able to give her obviously overburdened boyfriend any grace? That’s the ship that we’re supposed to root for?

I don’t think so. It was sloppy and badly done and it made no sense whatsoever. If they had to end the Portwell relationship, for whatever reason, I don't know, perhaps they didn’t want to encourage a sophomore-senior relationship or going to college while dating someone in high school. They could’ve easily done what they did with Ricky and Nini, and break them up on amicable terms because a relationship with someone in high school and someone in college just doesn’t work. 

They had no reason to abuse EJ’s character and ruin some of his relationships, before never talking about him again, while Ricky swoops in and takes his girlfriend AGAIN. It was so unnecessary and at this point it's repetitive. Because everytime there’s a season that starts off with 2 characters being madly in love, we all know it goes. 

So I don’t know how much I'll be watching.

(lol i just wanted to get this out of my system after watching the season 4 trailer)

[mrs-johansson]

Chapter 5: Avengers: Age of Ultron - Two Ghosts

Part 1:

“When can I meet her?” Dad asked as he came down to have lunch in my lab. “Soon. I want her to settle in, and I want her to have the hearing aid.” “And how’s that going?” He stood up and walked up to the table. “I’m just gonna run some more tests and we’ll see, maybe next week you two could meet,” I looked up at him.

“How is it that your friends have seen Katarina sooner than I would?” Dad had been trying to meet Katarina for months, but with James at the house and the setting time, I thought she could have a little more time. “Because they are not her relatives biologically. Clint helps me with babysitting and Natasha is… Natasha. Believe me, she’s worth the wait. I swear she has your attitude sometimes even though you two haven’t even met yet.” The proud and surprised look on his face was funny but also such a great feeling to see. “Okay show me some pictures then.”

***

The last couple of months have been hectic. Hiding James has been really difficult, but mostly for him. He couldn’t really leave the house without assistance and he was bothered by that obviously. Even though he’s very introverted and a house buddy, he wanted to get out there and explore the world on his own, which was not possible at these times.

So he stayed at home most days, spending time with Katarina and learning from within the four walls. He watched the news every morning and evening, surfed the internet for information, and read about the time he had missed.

We once visited the Smithsonian National Air and Space Museum, where he learned about himself and the war, but mostly about the Captain America we know now. James was so eager to know everything and be present that sometimes he got lost in what he actually wanted. He still didn't have a plan for what would come next. I tried everything to make him look further but he got stuck.

Meanwhile, Katarina was growing fast. She’s not even one and she has the abilities and looks of a 3 year old. She knows sign language to a full extent, which she learned in just a couple of weeks.

It is incredible to see how she’s developing day to day, but not gonna lie I miss the previous steps. I wanted to see her open her eyes for the first time, roll over for the first time and I’m not even gonna mention the first steps. I know I complain about great things but these are also great things to miss out on.

When I work, she’s in kindergarten from Monday to Thursday and on Fridays, she stays at Barton's. She already sees Clint and Laura as her uncle and aunt, and the kids as her cousins. They treat her like family, which I appreciate out of this world.

And Natasha, she’s here on most Saturdays, when Katarina is just full of joy. Nat is definitely her favorite, apart from me of course. They bonded on a deep level and it brings me happiness but also so much pain to know that we couldn’t work out.

Maybe if it wasn’t for the break-up, we would raise Katarina together. But it’s never perfect, is it?

On Fridays, which is today, I usually bring dinner to Clint’s house and we have dinner together.

Pulling up to the farm, I could see the kids and Clint playing outside, kicking a ball around. Katarina’s dark brown hair was gently braided into two little braids, and the pants she had on were basically dirty as the ground. She enjoys being outside since at home we only have a flat still.

The Bartons looked up to the sound of the car and Clint alerted Rina that I’d arrived, and she looked my way too. Her attention left the ball imminently and with those little feet, she started running towards me.

Seeing this was something that made me appreciate every little thing. She was getting older by the second and I wasn’t gonna miss one more minute with her.

I got out of the car and quickly rounded it before picking her up.

“Hi baby,” I gave a kiss to the side of her head, then put her back on the ground and kneeled in front of her. “Your hair is so pretty! Did Laura make it?” I asked. “No, Natasha.” Nat’s here? “Wow, she’s so cool, right?” She nodded. “How was today? Did you have fun?” “Yes, we painted. I made you something,” she took my hand and insisted on getting inside.

Getting the take-out dinner I picked up Katarina and made our way towards Clint and the kids. “Hey guys, I got us Chinese today,” I greeted the three of them. “Copper, why don’t you guys take the food inside? We’ll be there in a minute,” I gave him the bags of food and the three of them walked in, Katarina grabbing a hold of Lila’s hand.

“What is she doing here? She hasn't been returning my calls for over a week. And I know she wasn’t on a mission,” I turned to Clint. He looked inside then at me with a sigh. “I don’t know why she didn’t talk to you then, but now she’s here to talk. It seemed pretty serious,” he said. “Great, just perfect.”

Walking inside, the kids already settled around the table, Laura and Natasha unpacking the boxes. “Hi,” I said. Nat picked up her head and I couldn’t describe the look she gave me. “I was just saying the other to Clint, how much I craved Chinese but he didn’t get me any,” Laura’s voice made me look away. “Because it was in the middle of the night and we live on a farm,” Clint stepped in. “I’m glad your craving will be fulfilled,” I said.

Grabbing the plates, I had to step next to Natasha. “Nat,” I nodded her way. “Y/n.” The urge to read her mind was so tempting but I promised everyone that I won’t use it on them. “You haven’t been returning my calls,” I said as I reached the shelf.

“It wasn’t a phone conversation that I wanted to talk about,” she said. Voice tense, body language just strict. “We can talk after I put Katarina to sleep.”

***

Katarina insisted that Natasha would be the one who stays with her until she falls asleep, so I did the dishes so that Laura could relax a little, but she kept my company throughout.

“Dinner was weird,” she said. “What do you mean?” “You and Nat. What’s going on?” I stared at the water as it flowed through the sink. “It’s been strange for a while. She’s dictating herself from me, from us really. She canceled last week’s Saturday and hasn't answered my calls since. Of course, Rina asked for her, because she’s obsessed with her. But nothing. And last week too, like she was distracted at all times. And if it was work she would definitely tell me.” “Maybe she’s seeing someone,” she casually threw it out there. “You think?” I stopped the tap and dried my hands. “What else could it be? It’s Natasha, you and work were the only option she could be occupied with, but there’s no you anymore, and if it’s not work… Maybe she found someone,” the sad smile on Laura’s face was something strange. I know she loved us together but I didn’t think she would actually prefer us over other relationships. But she also probably knew something.

“So, can we talk?” Natasha walked down the stairs, and both of us looked her way. “Yeah, let’s go outside. Good night, Laura,” I said to the woman. “You too guys.”

As we made our way outside I played all the scenarios in my mind about what could happen. Maybe she did find someone and wants to disappear from my life, or maybe it is a work thing.

We were a great distance from the house and we didn't talk a word on the walk. Then she stopped at almost the end of the lot. “I know about Barnes,” her voice was filled with anger. “And?” I shrugged it off, trying to act cool.

“Y/n, are you insane?” She stepped closer, veins popping out on her neck. “He is dangerous! And you let your daughter around him? There’s a chance that he’s gonna be that killing machine again, and what are you gonna do then, huh? Or what if HYDRA finds him? That’s why you won’t let anyone over to your place! And what about Steve? You’re just gonna let him suffer and look for him when you know damn well that he sleeps in your bed, eats your food, and plays with your daughter every day.” “You have no idea Natalia how fucking hard it is for me! If it wasn’t for him I wouldn’t have found Katarina. I wouldn’t be alive if it wasn’t for him!” By now we were yelling at each other and I was glad the house was far away.

“I’ve been trying to help him settle in, to come up with a plan. But nothing. He doesn’t even want a glance at the future. For the past several decades he wasn’t Barnes, he wasn’t the Bucky Steve knows… But he’s trying to be the old him. He wants to learn and be human,” I explained but as I spoke she only got angrier. “How are you falling so easily into this? Y/n how can you be so naive after everything that happened?” Her hands spread to her sides, confusion hitting her face. “Naive?” I scoffed. “Every single day when I go home, I think he’s not gonna be there anymore. That he left, that they took him. For months I’ve been living on the fucking edge, scared to leave my daughter alone with him, scared to fall asleep next to him. I’m not naive, I just don’t want to make him feel even worse,” I said and turned around to walk back.

“No.” She simply said and I looked back at her. “No, you are just scared to be alone. You can’t be alone and you just won’t admit that,” she caught up to me and stood right in front of me. “Don’t ever talk to me about hating to be alone. I became a mother overnight, and I wasn’t gonna do this alone.” “But you are not alone,” Natasha took hold of my hand. But I took it away and shook my head. “I am.” “Y/n don’t shut me out now,” the want in her eyes was something I missed every day but I couldn’t let this happen. “I’m not shutting you out, but we talked about this. I can’t do this, not now… James is there and Rina, I-“ I stumbled over my words, didn’t even know what I wanted to say. “James…” She said quietly like she knew immediately. With the look she gave me, she definitely knew.

“You guys are a thing, aren’t you?” Her shoulders dropped. “We’re not a thing,” I looked away, shaking my head. “Oh don’t fucking lie to me. I know you, Y/n. You two are fucking for sure,” she got mad again, but mostly she looked disappointed. “What if we do? You have absolutely no right to question who I sleep or don’t sleep with. We broke up, Natasha. We ended things because it didn’t work. I’m sorry that I’m trying to move on. It hurts me like shit, that he’s not you, that it’s not us! I wanted you, Nat!” I yelled at her. She has no right to speak to me like that. “I wanted all of you. We had each other and now we don’t. So you don’t get to decide what I do with my life.”

***

“Good morning everyone,” Steve walked into the meeting room with Maria following him. Files in her hands she handed one to everyone. The team gathered around the table, while Steve presented our next mission.

“As you all know, we found another HYDRA Research Base. It’s in Sokovia, Europe. It is the base where we tracked Loki’s scepter and the plan is to retrieve it. The files have everything you need to know before we take off. Tomorrow morning we leave at 5. Any questions?” He looked around and everyone was silent. “Alright, see you tomorrow.”

***

Taking Katarina out of her seat, we made our way upstairs right away. It’s how the days go, in the mornings I drop her off at kindergarten and after work I get her and we go home to James.

After the meeting, I went to Stark Industries and we worked on some new projects and I finally finished Rina's hearing aid so I’m very excited to try it with her.

Opening the front door, I noticed the flat was awfully quiet. James usually is always on the couch when we get home, watching the news but now he isn't. The tv was turned off, no sign of James in the living room.

I shut the door behind me and put Katarina down, who took off to her room immediately. “James?” I called out once. Maybe he’s sleeping. I checked the kitchen and the balcony, but nothing. Bathroom empty. Then I made my way to the bedroom to see it was also without him in it.

And then I noticed an envelope. Lying on his pillow. My heart dropped and I couldn’t think of anything else other than he had left.

With shaky hands, I took hold of the envelope and saw my name written on it. Opened it and saw the handwritten letter. I sat down on the edge of the bed and read it.

Hey Doll,

We both knew this was coming for a long time now, but I think neither of us thought that it woulduld actually happen. I had to leave. For your and Katarina’s safety. I am a liability and it wouldn’t be safe for you two if I had stayed. I also didn’t want Steve to find me, he had enough trouble with me the last time we saw each other.

I won’t contact you and I don’t want you to contact me. The only communication I want is Katarina. I’d like you to send pictures to the address at the bottom every month. Just one picture of Katarina.

I am truly sorry and I promised I won’t leave you again, I am sorry that I broke this. But please forgive me, Doll.

Your James.

[themuse-if]

20 (or so) Questions with R Fukushi

Let's try to figure out this icy ballet bot! Is ballet really all that exists to them or do they have a secret sweet spot for something else?

Interviewer: Rina/Ren, thanks for taking the time to dive into more details. Let's start with your birthday – you're a Virgo, right?

R: Yes, September 10th. It's just another day, but people seem to think it holds some cosmic significance.

Interviewer: Understandable. Do you go by any nicknames, or is it all about Rina/Ren?

R: It's just Rina/Ren. Keeps it simple, and there's no need for unnecessary embellishments.

Interviewer: Got it. Beyond the world of dance, what are some good traits you'd say you possess?

R: Dedication and precision. When I set my mind on a goal, I don't stop until I've perfected it. Discipline is key.

Interviewer: Admirable qualities. Now, on the flip side, any challenging traits you're aware of?

R: Closed-off, perhaps a bit cold. Small talk isn't my forte.

Interviewer: Understood. Do you have any hobbies outside of dance?

R: Cardio and Pilates. Taking care of my body is not just a hobby; it's a necessity. A dancer's body is their temple.

Interviewer: Absolutely. Let's explore strengths a bit more. Besides dance, what do you consider your greatest strength?

R: Perfectionism. I strive for excellence in every move, every routine. Anything less is unacceptable.

Interviewer: And your biggest weakness?

R: Lack of openness, perhaps. I keep my circle small, and I don't readily let people in.

Interviewer: Understandable. Describe yourself in one word.

R: Focused.

Interviewer: How do you think others see you in one word?

R: Distant.

Interviewer: Let's talk about fears. What’s your greatest fear?

R: Not living up to my own standards. Failure isn't an option in my world.

Interviewer: Intense pressure. What are your top priorities in your life right now?

R: Becoming the best ballet dancer. Everything else comes second. It's about dominance in the world of dance.

Interviewer: Family time – tell me more about yours.

R: Fairly normal. My dad works in an office, my mom teaches Japanese at a community college, and my younger sister is navigating high school.

Interviewer: Future goals – what's on your agenda?

R: Dominating the ballet world. That's the only goal. Each performance is a step towards that.

Interviewer: Ambitious. Rainy days – how do you spend them?

R: If it's absolutely pouring and I can't force myself to walk over to the studio, then I'll just let myself relax. Maybe make some quick spaghetti and watch a movie. Maybe "Suspiria" the original of course. I have a thing for horror and suspense.

Interviewer: Not what I expected. Favorite book?

R: I'm Not that big on reading, but one of my friends made me read "The Dance of the Dolls" by Lucy Ashe. It features two of my favorite thing suspense and ballet, what more could I ask for. *shrugs*

Interviewer: Fair point. And your favorite movie?

R: Probably "Suspiria" the one done 1977 not the remake. It's visually stunning and the soundtrack by the band Goblin is a jarring masterpiece.

Interviewer: Alright. Any dark secrets?

R: No, not at all. What you see is pretty much what you get.

Interviewer: Ok...What about your physical appearance, what would you say is your best feature?

R: My body. I've put a lot of work into it, and I'm extremely proud of it

Interviewer: *gives R a long assessing look up and down* Indeed. I can tell. So, what about your least favorite?

R: My moles. there are just to many of them.

Interviewer: I think they're lovely, lots of people would call them beauty marks. *soft smile*

R: Yeah, I've heard that before. *completely deadpan*

Interviewer: Ok...last question, how would you describe being in love?

R: Haven't really thought about it. My focus is on dance, not romantic distractions. Then again, maybe one day once I've properly started my professional career.

Interviewer: Got it, Rina/Ren. Thanks for delving deeper into your world. Excited to witness your journey and dominance in the ballet scene!

[numetaljackdog]

what i'm listening to november 2023. the agony

spot. link//yt link

song notes under cut

Laura Les - Haunted: haunted. by laura les.

Garbage - Queer: stand up for the fag anthem. but also let's be real one of the main draws here is the music video where shirley manson pushes the pov character down to the ground and forcibly shaves your head while singing "i know what's good for you." i'm a lesbian

Chris Fleming - W.U.G.: i've met a couple wugs in my time but more than anything i'm just on my chris fleming shit recently. this one has been stucks in my head sooo bad and bsaically anytime i see the word "guy" it comes back with a vengeance

Limp Bizkit & Method Man - N 2 Gether Now: random lb songs will really just crop up in my rotation for seemingly no reason but really this one has so many good lines and the addition of method man brings it up by so much. it's comical on some level bc it's like why is he here, he's like. a real rapper. and fred sounds so out of his depth next to him. but at the same time they both do actually really pretty good. pull the plug and then jet. MIC CHECK.

Sloppy Jane - Bark Like a God: recommended by a friend. need to listen to the full album but this goes insane goes crazy i mean those damn vocals and the THEMES ugh i mean what else do you need in this world. don't even really know what to call this band but it good and i need more

Almeda Riddle - My Little Rooster: Gummo is a 1997 American experimental drama film written and directed by Harmony Korine, starring Jacob Reynolds, Nick Sutton, Jacob Sewell, and Chloë Sevigny. The film is set (but was not filmed) in Xenia, Ohio, a Midwestern American town that had been previously struck by a devastating tornado. The loose narrative follows several main characters who find odd and destructive ways to pass time, interrupted by vignettes depicting other inhabitants of the town.

Destroy Boys - Fences: mostly just real catchy. many such cases. but there is a certain doggish quality to it as well

Enon - Natural Disasters: hi violer :3 ooh ahh the song so catchy the riff so tastey and shiney

Limp Bizkit - The Truth: i watched the band's short film of the same name recently and was pretty underwhelmed. but it did make me wanna go back and listen to the ep! it's been said to death but it's easily some of lb's best work, and not just because it's the serious one or whatever

Repo! The Genetic Opera - Night Surgeon: tbh there should be more repo on here but there's only so much space and this is undoubtedly my favorite track from the soundtrack (although "at the opera tonight" comes pretty damn close!!) i could listen to anthony head go "i remember" like that allllll day. i have been having some serious repo fixation recently i won't lie. give it a watch it's a normal movie

Foo Fighters - Everlong (Acoustic Version): okay look you guys know at this point how i get about everlong. so when i was watching hit film little nicky starring adam sandman and a rather beautiful sequence took place accompanied by a sparse acoustic version still laden in the characteristic warmth of the original song, of course i was hooked. and that's a nu metal-ass movie, too, but this was the pick i ended up making. that's special

Dropkick Murphys - I'm Shipping Up To Boston: WOOOOO BOSTON!!!!!!!! GO BRUINS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GET ME A CUP O DUNKS!!!!!!! WOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!! YANKEES SUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <is not from boston but rather a different place entirely

Fefe Dobson - Unforgiven: why did nobody tell me about this fuckin nu metal x y2k pop fusion. this is like rina sawayama stfu but all the way back in 200-goddamn-3. fefe you were before your time

MGMT - Little Dark Age: i don't know mgmt that well but i heard a little bit of this song in a youtube video long ago and really liked it and could never find it and then i happened to encounter it again and was like oh hello my old acquaintance shall we get to know each other better

Billy Joel - All For Leyna: beginning to realize that billy is good actually. every little part of this song is crunchy and sweet and delicious for me. and god i sure am doing it all for leyna aren't i......

Tom Cardy & Brian David Gilbert - Beautiful Mind: tbh this was far from my favorite effort from either of these guys...... didn't really think it was all that funny. had a very lol random sort of appeal that just didn't hit me right. however it does sound amazing, really clean, and they both have nice voices. plus you know i love them harmonies

Taco - Puttin' on the Ritz: they play this a lot at a cafe i go to sometimes. i used to not like this song but it's really grown on me. it's one of those absolutely one-of-a-kind songs that could have only been a hit at the exact time and place that it was. and i like stuff like that! you might even say i think it's super duper :)

Violent Femmes - Breakin' Up: this song is dumb as balls. and it sounds way better in my head than it does to actually listen to it. but! the video is really cool, with that simple but effective camera trick. i enjoy that

Bowling For Soup - Girl All the Bad Guys Want: if the previous song was dumb as balls, this song is dumb as. like. the epididymis. or like a single sperm cell. i don;t know man it's a dumb fucking song. but it's about a cool rap rocker girl :3 and that's meeeeee probably. when i listen to it i like to rate each lyric on how true it is. watching wrestling? maybe now and then. creaming over tough guys? hmmm no i would simply not do this. but listening to rap metal? turntables in her eyes?? now we're fuckin talkin!!!!!!!!!!

[caswellmendes]

my not-so-lil rant

disclaimer—this is no hate to any of the characters or actors. just me ranting about the writing of this show.

*sigh*

hi friends. it me.

i know i’m probably the 100th post you’ve seen today discussing the finale, but i just gotta get some things off my chest. 

first, i will say this. i love this show with my whole heart. and y’all know how much i love portwell. i’ve been in this ship since s1. 

but... (i’m gritting my teeth as i type this) i will gladly go into s4 excited to see rina’s story unfold like i have all the rest. if a new chapter is ahead for both of these characters, then i’ll welcome it with open arms.

but i just have an issue with how it all went down.

in what world could no one, except val, (bless you val, we love you), be there for ej when his world was upside down. 

imagine planning on spending this last summer before adulthood with your childhood friends. dreaming of summer nights at a summer camp you’d been dying to show them and the chance to just being a kid one last time.

but then, you’re not asked, but you’re literally backed into a corner and obligated to throw that all out the window and direct a full-length musical production.

imagine for a second what it would feel like to lead an entire group of distract-able, dramatic teenagers. but more than that, they’re your best friends. and you don’t want to let them down or do a mediocre job.

imagine that you only had fourteen DAYS to make sure lines were memorized, costumes were ready, sets were prepped, and musical numbers were rehearsed. 

imagine if you had a father who decided for HIMSELF what YOUR future was going to be. because for him you would be a failure doing anything else. never said he was proud of you. never asked where you wanted to go to school. never asked what your dream was. nope. it was all HIS decision and you had to live with that. sorry!

imagine finally opening your heart up again to someone new in your life. and this summer was going to be your time together, away from the drama of high school. away from the drama of home. just you two, finally being the leads and spending the whole summer together.

but too bad, the lead goes to the guy who stole your ex. and has his eyes now on your girlfriend.

then imagine that in your head, the only real hope of you ever staying with your girlfriend, your friends, your literal chosen family, was dependent on how successful this play was. you were doing it for their success and for yours.

oh and just imagine that ALL of it was going to air on TV. FOR THE WORLD TO WATCH AND JUDGE.

so yeah maybe i’d be stressed out of my mind. yeah maybe my world would probably be upside down too. maybe i’d feel every minute of my time was valuable. yeah maybe i’d be terrified out of my mind to show my girlfriend a letter determining my fate, my fate that i MYSELF wasn’t even ready or willing to accept.

but who cares right? you’re the villain. you’ve got to “take it down a notch” cause you’re ignoring your friends, you’re not allowed to try and be in two places at once, you’re lame for skipping out on hikes in the woods, you’re missing bucket-list shenanigans, you’re just too stressed.

and all your efforts were for nothing. because guess who didn’t show up for you? everyone you’re doing this for. your dad. your ex-girlfriend. your cousin. your friends. 

because apparently people think it’s justifiable to give up on others during the span of two weeks when they’re going through anxiety. pressure they didn’t ask for. stress they were trying to cope with so that you could all be successful and be TOGETHER.

oh but you’re just being your 1.0 self.

again—no hate to any characters. i just hate the way ej’s story unfolded. it boils down to the almost universal lack of support he got, and i just can’t wrap my head around it.

i just—UGH.

[viktorybell]

If I’m Honest

Marina x Pearl

Word Count: 1.2k

Warning: none

Prompt: 50 Ways to Say “I Love You” (deity-prompts) #35 “I’d rather just hang out with you, if I’m honest” 

“It’s me and you against the world, ‘Rina!” Pearl cheers, throwing her arms up in a quick celebratory pose before leaning forward in her seat towards her co-host. “Let’s wake the sleepin’ giants with our sloppy sonic science!”

Across from Pearl, Marina sniffles, dabbing at her eyes gently as she responds, “Yeah, let’s bring our bumpin’ beats to the oceans and streets!”

“Our splatfests may be coming to an end, but Off the Hook is just getting started!” Pearl kicks her legs up as she spins in her host's chair, Marina informing their audience where they can find their gifts for participating in their final Splatfest. “Until next time!”

The two jumped up and joined together for their outro, “Don’t get cooked, stay Off the Hook!!”

Marina watches as her co-host slumps back into her chair, a satisfied grin on her face as she watches their crew celebrate a truly fantastic last Splatfest. As much as they played it up for the camera, Marina is proud of her Pearl for winning. They’ve come so far over the past two years, Marina never thought she could accomplish anything like that. She’d been stuck in OCtavio’s army for what had felt like forever, making weapons that were to be used on the very city she now loved.

But here she was! A star! An Inkopolis Square star with a show she helps run with her closest companion in the whole world! Oh, and here Marina is, getting teary eyed again…

“Everything fresh, ‘Rina?” Pearl asks, scooting to the edge of her seat where Marina was still standing in front of her own host’s chair. “I’m sorry Team Order lost, I can make sure your side of the apartment has NO chaos on it at all, swear!”

“You’re too sweet, Pearlie. I’m ok, I just,” Marina pauses to wipe at her eyes, smiling a shaky smile down at her other half. “Just a li’l overwhelmed is all.”

“Too overwhelmed for our Off the Hook wrap party?!” Pearl springs up from her chair, bouncing excitedly around their set. “Crusty Sean is gonna cater it and even Annie’s gonna be there, and I haven’t seen her ONCE since she started working for Sheldon! Oooh, I wonder if I can get Sheldon to drink enough Ink-well Chillers then maybe I can finally convince him to make that portable Princess Cannon-oh! Or I-”

“Pearlie-”

“Maybe I can convince Annie! We went to school together, I’m sure if I promised to use my cool-rockstar-celebrity influence to get some primo snacks for her clown fish then maybe-”

“Pearlie, I don't think I-”

“Hm. I lied, I actually don’t know what clown fish eat, and if I killed Annie’s fish then I’d probably get banned from Ammo Knights for life. Heh, not that that’s a bad thing. Save me from listenin’ to the old man’s drivel. I swear, that fool can just talk and talk and talk and-”

“Pearl!!” Marina finally raises her voice, fighting to be heard over Pearl’s externalized internal monologue. “Sorry, Pearlie. Just had to get your attention. I don’t…I don’t think I’m gonna come to the wrap party tonight.”

Pearl’s demeanor switched almost immediately, going from hopping around the studio to standing still as ever in front of Marina. A clammy sweat formed on the back of Marina’s neck, she hated to bring down the mood, but today had been…a lot. Between the emotions running high in their last Splatfest special and all the work this Spaltfest has entailed…It’s just too much. Marina’s good in a crisis, less so in a giant dance hall full of inklings just begging to talk to her or to pull her into a dance or sing for them. As much as she’d like to stand by Pearl’s side at that stuffy after party, she’s 90% sure it would trigger an episode right about now.

“Word, ‘Rina. Do you want me to pick up some take-out instead?” Pearl cocks her head to the side, gold eyes clear of judgment or disappointment or anything other than the adoration and affection she held for her co-host and best friend.

“Huh? Take out?” Marina’s face was heating up, Pearl’s eye contact was always intense and made her feel like a clumsy little girl again.

“Yeah! I mentioned Crusty Sean’s earlier, I’ve been cravin’ a Galactic Seanwich all week, but I think there’s gonna be a food truck stoppin’ by too. Crab-n-go I think?” Pearl continued on like Marina wasn’t having a minor conniption. “Ooh, how about a movie? I’ll let you pick this time!”

“No, Pearlie, I mean take out? A movie? What about your wrap party?” Looking down, letting her tentacles fall in her face, Marina turned to stare out through the Inkopolis side windows. “I don’t want you to miss out on a fun night just because I’m…tired tonight.”

Words are hard. The only words that come to Pearl easily are the sick rhymes she writes for her and her ‘Rina’s hot tracks. For as much as Pearl loves to ramble and rap and rhyme, when it comes to expressing herself, expressing how she feels to Marina, she feels she’s fallen short for what feels like the first time in her life. But Pearl would do anything for Marina. She’d move mountains or explode evil telephones or help rescue a super cool secret agent from an underground subway that might, like, actually be the coolest music video back drop ever if they could just-

Pushing through the mental block in her head that stops her from getting mushy on Marina, she grabs both her hands. Marina peeks out from behind her bangs, eyebrows drawn together in worry.

“I’d rather just hang out with you, if I’m honest,” Pearl states simply.

Marina nods her head, almost frantically, gripping Pearl’s hands back and pulling them close to her heart. She also seems at a loss for words. And where silence would normally unsettle Pearl, she found there wasn’t a single place in the world she’d rather be than in front of her partner, asking what she wanted to pick up for dinner.

“Alright,” Marina’s voice was high pitched and strained as she held back from launching into a bear hug and snuggling into Pearl like her life depended on it. “Take out sounds good.”

“And a movie?”

“And a movie,” Marina smiles down at Pearl, pressing a kiss to the back of each of her hands. Pearl lets out an ear piercing squeal that makes Marina thankful for the headphones she never takes off. They come in handy more often than you’d think.

“FRESH yeah!! I heard they just got this new menu item called the Pescatariat Royale!” Pearl rambles on, never letting go of Marina’s hand as they walk out of the studio side-by-side.

There’s paparazzi swarming the building, every Inkopolis reporter and their brother was out there, flashing their cameras and calling out to the stars as they ran to Rina’s dope motorcycle.

For once, her co-host’s hand in hers, Marina just laughed as she ran past the press and hopped on. Pearl immediately tucked in close, wrapping her arm around the other’s waist and throwing out a peace sign as she shouted out her love for their devoted fans.

It was hard to feel bad with Pearl by her side.

[brainrawt]

Do you have any late thoughts on the proposal

Thank you for asking (ages ago - I am SO SORRY)!

I haven’t thought about All American too much during this hiatus but here’s some thought dumps. 

Jordan’s relationship with Layla has been a vehicle for displaying Jordan’s character development. He summed up his entire year with the word “maturity” and pretty much his primary plot in S5 was Layla. He is more mature now and we see it in his relationship with Layla. As a fan of Jordan and Jordayla, I’m happy to see how his character journey continues through the marriage chapter of life, and how it’s good and right. When he got married the first time, he didn’t ask his parents, he didn’t put in the work into the marriage afterwards, he didn’t tell his friends about it, he just did not go about it in a way that set them up to be successful at all. This time will be different. I did want to have heard his reflections but we’ll see them for sure.

In the last episode, Layla was the mouthpiece for the cons for marriage. I just can’t wait to hear them describe their decision and relationship. 

I just LOVE the later parts of a ship where we look over their past moments (Did anybody else just watch the Rina flashback montage in hsmtmts S4?!). When they call back to prom etc, when I hear their vows, I fear I won’t survive.

In S3, it comes up repeatedly that Jimone thought that marriage would turn their love “real”, whereas Jordayla’s love is very much already REAL. I did want to make a post about this but just don't have it in me to rewatch S3 lol.

To revisit their best friends era, just rewatch S4. To revisit their dating era, just rewatch S5. It doesn’t matter if it's too soon for them to get married, just watch S6 when you’re ready hahaha. I’m happy that a married era is being filmed and released of our favourite couple, who wouldn't be?

A cute thing – When he’s advising Asher about Jaymee, he talks about her being “not afraid to live.” Similar to 5x20, when talking about Jasher, we can hear into his thoughts about his own relationship. One of the main reasons for proposing is that after his traumatic experience, he’s eager to live, and he can only see himself doing it with one person. We see this theme repeatedly: “He wants to start a life with her” / “I don’t want to spend a day of my life without you knowing.” Also, whilst he’s giving relationship advice, Layla is heart eyeing him hard and it takes me back to the first time she caught feelings for him when he was giving relationship advice about Clay during the prom dance and she’s taken aback by that sincere passionate side of him. It’s still something that makes her swoon!

I’ve enjoyed their love story happening away from everyone, a little nervous for them to be in the middle of the spotlight. Oh, and I hope the marriage process is not to Billy-centric, hearing his name in the proposal almost sent me over the edge. Realistically, I know he’ll come up but I just won’t love it. 

I think the writers always (as much as a fan can ask for) get them right and will continue to. 

I’ve missed talking about Jordayla. Thanks for your ask anon!

[ja3yun]

HIIIII HAPPY MELTING POINT DAYYY 😆🎉 we should start normalising saying happy melting point day instead of happy friday actually

finally completed my workload for the day so i finally have the time to read the newest chapter 😝 im seated, seat belts buckled & so ready for the ride

"boyfriend" I GIGGLED THEY R SOOOOO TGT NOW 🫂🫂 used to pray for moments like this ...ok the minhee not responding to yn as usual kinda sus yea 🧐🧐 but anyways dgaf for now bc HOON CAME TO SURPRISE YN? I LIVE FOR THEM 🤍🤍🤍🤍 STOPP HE LET HER ADD HER OWN TOUCHES TO HIS CAR?:!!: AWWWW THATS SO SWEET i love when couples have a synergistic effect like hoon showers yn w all his love and attention and likewise yn gives hoon nothing but love and pride they truly are meant for each other

NO WAIT HOONYN HAD MORE HISTORY?.?:! when i say match made in heaven i really do mean it 😭 but hoon saying he had a reason when he rejected her... 🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐🧐 HMMMMM HMMMMMM 🧐🧐🧐 FAWKKING HELL THEY SAID WHAT NOW 🥺🥹🥺🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹 they LOVE each other 🥹🥹🥹🥹 aj i ABSOLUTELY LOVE the little glimpse into hoonyn's past and the little moments that add up to their r/s now im just 🥰

i also absolutely love hoon sets yn straight like u can love both parties but there really shouldnt be a double standard, family or not. and its so refreshing to see main characters actively voice out their feelings! yn pookie imma have to need a word with u bc... i get that this is minhee's first chance at going even bigger but its still as big a thing for hoon too 🥺 and we cant deny minhee has said terrible things about him too...

oh no the mother and son r plotting.. i dont like that 😠😠 okayyyyyy minhee is acting too cold to yn for it to be normal now 🤨🤨🤨 UGH I JUST HATE THEIR MOM. like WOMAN PLEASE. theyre both ur kids ur flesh and blood i get that this is a big thing for minhee but like UGH 😤 OMG? rina made hoon's fit? SLAYYY U GO GIRLLL

WORLD PAUSE. WHAT HAPPENED?:!/!/& the moment i read the words "his ankle unexpectedly snaps at a 90 degree angle" MY HEART DROPPED MY JAW DROPPED BC THERES NO FREAKING WAY. does minhee want to fight WHY IS HE HOLDING YN BACK. LITERALLY LET THE GIRL GO!!!!! wtf. did minhee actually have something to do w hoon's skates. bc if he did istg. NOT HIM TRYING TO CHANGE THE TOPIC WTF. NOW IS NOT THE FREAKING TIME U DINGDONG!!!! but ig now we know why he was acting so distant w his own sister 😠

OK SO HE REALLY DID IT? oh U WANNA FIGHT KANG?.!.!/ AND HERE COMES THE MOTHER. if u can even call her that 😡🤬 IM SO?.!.&/ WHY WOULD THEY DO THAT DO U HAVE NO SHAME NO MORALS WTFFF 🤬🤬🤬🤬 i knew chapter 4 was the calm before the storm 😭😭😭😭 i hope yn got to see hoon tho 😭 im starting a hoon ankle speedy recovery manifestation ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹

icb i finished the chapter so soon 🙃 now im back to living non melting point days.... patiently waiting for melting point day to come 🤍

i am with you on that! happy melting point day is how i'm greeting every friday from now on !!

ynhoon have been going longer than anyone realised and honestly i know i wrote it but why do i still get so ajdhsjhd over hoon when i remember he told his dad to give her the sweets?? its my little pocket of happiness :( and it just makes the i love you so much more deeper than we realise!!

minhee and the mum, honestly, i love the reactions 😭 the plot thickens each chapter and i can't wait to watch everyone unfold it along with yn.

thank you as always for reading! ilysm you have no idea!!

[ughitsl-ay]

Portwell Engame

AN: Ok so I accidentally posted an alt ending on my page so imma give the full thing so it makes sense. Feel free to comment which ending seems better!

AN: This is how I win. Like now stay with me, this is what tf is going to happen season finale. WATCCHHH. So this is how I envision portwell ending up staying together, but not without angst from Ricky’s irra ass. It's going to give Rina for bit but trust I make it worth your while IKDR! 

DESC: So lemme preface it with some information. Gina has been feeling conflicted about her feeling towards Ricky at camp which obviously causes tension between ej and gina’s new budding relationship. this is set as the season finale.

Gina feels like a volcano boiling over, waiting to erupt. She finally felt like she had stability. A semblance of order. And now it seems like it’s all being thrown away because she can’t choose! She just walked away from EJ after having a conversation with him. They decided to cool off their relationship with each other after the confusion she has been feeling towards Ricky. As always, Ej being a better man than everybody. He was understanding and respectful. Telling her to not sweat it and even giving a corny dad joke which made her laugh. She knew though that it hurt him. If only for how his smile dropped when he thought she wasn’t looking.

Now she’s sitting around a campfire with the other members, trying to act like she’s not deeply upset. It used to come easy to her to fake it. After moving as many times as her, she learned how to shapeshift, like a chameleon. She knew exactly how malleable she needed to become to be likable. But now, it’s so much harder to conjure up that same determination she had to be liked. To put on a mask so everyone else is more comfortable.

The fire is warm on her skin, contrasting to the slight breeze from the night air. The other campers are singing, “Can I have This Dance” by the musical Disney movie High School Musical 3. She tries to mumble the lyrics too but can’t seem to bring herself to do it.

She looks up, her eyes glazed over as her mind races thinking about other things when she catches Ricky’s eye.

He’s looking directly at her. His guitar in one hand. It almost seems like he’s singing directly to her. The crackling flames from the fire dancing in his brown eyes. (watch this kiki)

And with every step together, we just keep on getting better So can I have this dance (can I have this dance)

His melodic voice rings out through the camp as he sings along to the lyrics. Making gina’s breath hitch in her throat, and her heart beat faster. It’s almost like her ears zero in on his voice only. The other campers’ voice blending in with the noise of the night.

Finally they get to the last lyric, the other campers voices getting quiet as Ricky strums out the last tune of the song.

“Can I have this dance?”

His eyes burn into hers, “Can I have this dance?” His voice being the only one still singing.

Suddenly she cannot take it anymore. Feeling overwhelmed, hot, and more confused than she’s ever felt in her life. She hops off the lawn chair and quickly runs in the opposite direction. Closer to the yurts and back to her room. Back to safety. Back to where things weren’t as complicated.

Unfortunately she can hear that someone is following her. Their footsteps crunching the dark dirt under their shoes. Walking briskly. She wants to keep walking. Pretend she doesn’t hear anything. And she almost does. She starts walking faster, her head down and her heart in her throat when she hears a voice ring out.

“Gina.”

She stops in her tracks.

Damn it.

She doesn’t turn around. But she hears the footsteps getting closer, until she feels a hand at her shoulder.

“Gina. Please.”

She squeezes her eyes tight. Takes a breathe and let’s him turn her around. Ricky’s hand sliding down to her hand.

And there he is.

His curls moving slightly with the wind, Those dark brown eyes looking deeply into her own with determination and intensity.

Those damn eyes.

Those eyes used to make her heart skip a beat. It used to have her cheeks warm and a smile stained onto her lips. She doesn’t know how she feels now.

not like-

Ricky exhales and gives a smirk, “You would make an excellent track star, Gina Porter.”

She smiles but it doesn’t reach her eyes.

His smirk drops slowly and he let’s out another breath. Like he’s psyching himself up for something.

“Gina...I-”, He shakes his head, his brain trying to conjure up the words he wants desperately to say.

“I like you. A lot. Like more than I ever thought I would. And it hit me like a train. We have been dancing the same dance for years and it seems like it took me to see you with someone else, to really see you.”

He steps closer, “See you how you wanted me to see you I suspect. See you how you ought to be seen.” He breaks off with a slight nervous smile, “I’m bad at this, words, which is weird because I write songs but I’m rambling now which is besides the point, what I mean to say is...”, he grasps her other hand, it seems the flames she saw in his eyes at the campfire have returned. Maybe they were never from the fire. Just him, “I want to be with you. Gina. Truly. Badly.” His hands shaking hers slightly on the last word, yearning in his voice.

She should smile right? she should smile and interlock her fingers with his and nod and finally have the clarity and the guy she wants, right? Right?

But...she doesn't feel that way. She doesn’t feel anything really. She just feels tired.

He must see the facial expression on her face because his small smile drops.

She drops his hands and shakes her head, her eyes becoming misty, “Ricky, I can’t do this.”

Stark understanding shows through his eyes and he swallows thickly. He looks down. Hurt evident in his voice, “Oh.”

There’s a silence between them for a loaded minute. The energy between them is oh so stagnant. So still. But she hears the crickets and the wind. Can smell the smoke in the air and hear the distant laughter from the other campers. It’s just them.

Ricky and Gina. Gina and Ricky.

The new kid and the skater boy.

Oh how times have changed.

He picks up his head and looks at her with lowered eyes. “Do you- I just...”, he sighs, “Why?”

She shrugs, looking around, finally feeling the chill of the air, “Ricky I-”, She takes a breath and looks directly at him, “I think I deserve better. “

He looks at her, his eyes getting slightly bigger.

She sniffles and wipes her nose with the back of her hand, blaming it on the cold and not how she feels inside, “I spent so many-so many of the most transformative years of my life, pining after YOU, chasing after YOU, wishing, hoping, praying, that one day you’d finally see something that wasn’t there. I wished so badly that I was enough. “

He shakes his head reaching towards her as he steps forward, she steps back, “I wanted so badly for someone to want me the way it seemed I did with everyone else. I wanted and yearned for a friend, I crushed after you, I wanted my teachers to like me and people to think I was good. that I was great actually. Someone worth it. Someone to keep around.”

He interrupts her, “You are, Gina. You are worth it I’m sorry-”

She continues, “I mean I cried over you, I cried to you. I put my heart on the line multiple times, constantly putting myself out there when every fiber in my being was telling me to walk away to avoid getting hurt.”

His hands drop back to his sides. Looking caught in her intense stare.

“And I got nothing in return.”, she balls her hands up at her sides, “I deserve to be pined after. To be wanted. To be chased. To be treated as the first choice. I deserve to be wanted first, Ricky. Not after I’ve moved on. Not after I’ve finally gotten everything I’ve wanted.”

He slumps and looks down. Nodding his head. She un-balls her fists and a cool breeze comes across her face. Cooling down her heated cheeks. She closes her eyes for a bit. Just feeling. Just for a moment.

She hears his small voice, making her open her eyes, “Was it that bad? Was I-” he stops for a second and starts again, “Were there no good moments between us?”

She almost wants to scream at him. To tell him yes it was bad and that he was careless with her precious heart and made her feel lonely. If this was 2 years ago she would have. She would have let him have it and walked away while her heart was breaking. Then pushed it back inside and deep down into the recesses of her body. Another thing to carry with her. But she wasn’t Gina 1.0. Not fully. And really...it’s not his fault. He can’t choose who to love. He can’t choose who his heart belongs to.

“No, Ricky...it wasn’t all bad. “ She looks at him with kind eyes, “ That first year I moved here, I was so stressed and scared. I didn’t want to get attached to anybody and tried so hard to keep my distance. But you”, she pokes him in his shoulder, a genuine smile on her lips, “wiggled yourself in. and I softened. I will always be eternally grateful for you taking a chance on me. I truly truly am.”

She could see the relief her words gave him. How his shoulders sagged and his face softened. It almost felt unfair that she’s giving him peace of mind. That he get’s comforted in this situation.

Now there was a comfortable silence between them. It seems that the campers had finally retired for the night because there wasn’t any background noise. It finally felt like a weight has been lifted off her chest. This whole summer, there was turmoil and confusion. Her heart at it’s capacity for how she was feeling. Now it just felt calm, and good.

“It’s him right? He wanted you first right? EJ?”

She breaks out in a big smile. Looking down bashfully, “Yes, yes he did. He listens to me. And gives me advice and a shoulder to lean on. He lifts me up and he’s smart and nice. And he makes me laugh which is surprising given his horrible dad jokes.” they both chuckle, “And he’s a good guy. He’s actually a great guy. He actually bought a plane ticket for me to come back to salt lake to see the musical that year. And that was before everything. Before we both changed and grew. I think EJ has always had that inside of him. That goodness. He was just fighting against it.”

She sighs, “And really...he’s probably my favorite person. No he is. He is my favorite person. I like being around him-it’s like there’s this ball of warm energy around him and it’s addicting to be around. It’s like you can’t help yourself. “

They fall into another short reprieve from talking and her thoughts are all on EJ. She left it so horribly with him. Basically dumped him for another guy and ran off. And him being the fluffiest cutest, most endearingly good guy she’s ever met, took it all with a smile. 

My god...

She looking at the ground, panic clouding her thoughts when Ricky interrupts her spiraling inner monologue.

“Go. I’ll be fine.”

She gives a slight smile and walks away towards the barn. That was the last place she saw him at. Where she basically told him that they should call it quits. It’s probably too late. He’s probably asleep in bed and she’s wasting her time.

She opens the barn doors with a creak. She looks around her eyes adjusting to the dark, the moonlight through the big windows being the only source of light. That's when she sees him.

He's sitting at the table that was used for auditions. His elbows propped up on the table and chin against his knuckles. He has a candle lit on the table. giving off a huge shadow cast from him. He’s fiddling with the papers on the table. 

He looks very un-EJ. Which makes a knot form in her throat and a rock settle in her stomach.

She quietly walks over to the table. Right next to other chair next to him. He finally looks up at her and his eyes widen.

“Gina?”

She smiles slightly, “In the flesh, can I...sit?” 

He looks at her with confusion and nods absent-mindedly. Never taking his eyes off of her.

She always wants him to look at her like that.

She sits down and turns to looks at him. He tenses and drops the arm that was holding up his chin.

“So...how did everything go with RB?” He bumps his shoulder against her and gives a smile. It doesn’t reach his eyes though. It actually doesn’t even reach his lips really. It sort of turns into a grimace

Her heart clenches. 

She puts her hand on the arm that’s still on the table, “EJ...”

He shrugs her off, “I mean, did it go well? Ah that Ricky. It’s 2 to 0 now. It seems he always get’s the last laugh huh?”

And she might have felt offended. That she isn’t just some prize to win and lose. But she knew it was deeper than that. She knew that he was really hurt. More than he was letting on. 

She was about to speak up but he was quicker. “And honestly I should have known, I mean you’re Gina Porter. You’re so incredibly talented and smart and pretty. And I was so mean when we first met. So incredibly rude and selfish.” He shakes his head, self-deprecation coloring his words,  “So maybe this is for the best after all. Ricky is actually a good guy and I just want you to be ha-”

She interrupts him by turning his head towards her with a hand on her cheek. Slowly. 

Oh so slowly. 

His eyes reach hers. Those beautiful green eyes. EJ could never hide a thing in his eyes. Too expressive. Too sensitive. She could see the glassiness in them now. Something that she put there.

She puts her other hand to his other cheek. So she’s cradling his face in her palms. 

“EJ...Eric. I’m right here.”

He blinks in confusion. 

She scoots closer to him. Her face inches from him. 

“Im right here. Sitting next to you. With you. I’m not going anywhere. “

He looks into her eyes, searching for hesitancy. Lies. He seems satisfied because his eyes slide down to his lips then back to her eyes.

“Why?” He whispers.

She gives a small smile and presses her forehead against his. Their noses slightly touching. She slides her hands back towards the nape of his neck. Combing his soft brown locks at the bottom.

He sighs.

“Because you make me so incredibly happy. You really do, EJ. And you’re the nicest person I know. You listen to me, and give me advice. You never make me feel like I’m taking up too much space. You calm me. You make me laugh everyday. And your jokes are horrible, absolutely terrible, “ They both chuckle, “But I love them so much...You have this bright and beautiful presence around you and it’s like I’m gravitated to it. I’m sorry for straying. I was confused then. I’m not anymore. “

He’s smiling genuinely now and her heart feels full and skips a beat.

This is what it feels like. Huh.

He shakes his head and puts his palm against her face. His thumb grazing the apple of her cheek and his pointer finger pushing a braid behind the shell of her ear. She shivers.

“You are the most incredible person I've ever met. Truly. I haven’t felt this happy in a long time. And it’s all because of you. And I haven’t felt as much despair as I did when I thought I lost you,” She shakes her head and push themselves closer, a sliver of distance between them, “You don’t realize how precious you are to me.” He whispers against her lips. 

Her eyes are closed now and her voice slurs as she speaks quietly to him, “I think I’m in love with you.”