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nobodysdaydreams · 8 months

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OH AM I GONNA HAVE SOME FUN WITH THIS IF I EVER HAVE THE TIME TO WRITE FANFIC

(Or my reaction to Episode 61 of Wolf359: Brave New World).

Well gang, we did it. We've reach the end. Sorry for how my reactions went from super spaced out to speed running the finale in a number of days, but I did warn you that I'm just sporadic like that. Though I have been semi-putting Brave New World off, because as much as I want to know how Wolf359 ends, I don't want it to end. I love these characters. I want good things for them. As much as I hate what they did, I wish that Hilbert and Maxwell had gotten the chance to get the redemption arc that Jacobi got. Hilbert had plenty of opportunities, but Maxwell was young and its not fair. I don't know how much more sadness they are gonna throw at me, but I'm guessing its a lot and I can't listen to it all in one sitting, so I'm just mentally preparing myself.

I also don't want this to end because I've loved giving you guys these reactions. Thank you all for reading my rambles and enjoying them. It means a lot to me, and I hope you were entertained. Thanks for coming on this journey with me, and please know that the second this is over, I am gonna figure out how to unblock the wolf359 tags (I did it so long ago I forgot how I did it, oopsie-daisy), and I am am gonna be reblogging and going crazy over all your posts and fanart and stuff so I hope you're ready for that.

Plus finishing the podcast also means it's time for me to deliver on those fics I promised y'all, which have been very carefully written (in my head). I will write them out eventually, but if there is anything my tmbs mutuals will tell you, my wolf359 mutuals, it's that my ideas tend to lead to other ideas, which means my fics do tend to be a little long, but (based on the reviews I've gotten) worth the read. So it might take a while to get them on AO3, but when I do, I hope you enjoy them!

Tagging the mutuals who got me invested in this, and if you want to be tagged or untagged from these posts, lmk, or you can follow my blog or simply follow the tag "#bods wolf359 reactions". Anyone who has followed me for a while knows my updates are inconsistent, so I apologize in advance for that and for any spelling/grammar mistakes in my posts.

@sophieswundergarten @oflightningandstars @acollectionofcuriousreblogs @herawell @commsroom @lovelyladylavie

Episode 61: Brave New World

The fact that Brave New World was written in 1932 and Cutter and Pryce are old and the fact that the message of Brave New World is about humans losing their humanity...already we're setting the stage.

And based on Kepler's earlier declaration, why do I suspect that this is the part where Doug's daughter's life and Minkowski's husband's life are finally on the line. I know Cutter and Pryce won't hesitate to aim their guns at them (and probably the rest of the planet too).

That moment when you can't tell if Wolf359 starts with sad piano music, or if this is just an ad for another podcast.

Oh it's the intro. Hi Hera! Or Miranda...oh wait I genuinely can't tell if this is Miranda talking about herself or Hera talking about her.

Clouded eyes, weak heart, child genius, orphan, no friends...I see. Obsessed with making things stronger and better. Yeah, except for herself I bet. Oh. She made her friends. Because she could control them. "Never left her behind, never talked back, never were afraid of her...except when she wanted them to be." "The one thing she couldn't fix was herself" see I called it!

Until? Oh no. Marcus.

And Old Man? Almost as clever as her? "Hello little girl. I want you to make a doll for me. You're very best doll. It must look like a real person, and sound like a real person, and be a real person." "And if I can?" "Then you and I will fix the world. I will be young and you will be whole and the world will finally be everything it could be. Everything it should be."

Okay. Thoughts.

When I made my jokes about Pryce being Cutter's evil science girlfriend, I was not assuming a romantic relationship, I was trying to use that language to insult Pryce and Cutter by making them sound like the kids they hate so much in a frivolous, juvenile and toxic relationship. Then, I was told by a few of you that given this assumption, it’s important that I know that I shouldn't assume that Pryce met Cutter when she was young based on this story and it was meant to be "fairytale language", which does make sense given that Cutter being willing to call Miranda his "work wife" when he's known her since she was young enough to be his granddaughter is incredibly creepy.

I appreciate the clarification, but also, I really don't think it matters whether this is hyperbole or not. If it is, then okay. Pryce and Cutter's relationship is still weird. If it's not, then Cutter's a creep, what a surprise. Tell me something I don't know.

"And so they did. And everyone lived happily ever after. The end."

The fact that it's Cutter that interrupts Miranda's story to give that closing line and declare this the end adds to the creepiness. Miranda says what Marcus's promise to her was, but never says whether she agreed before Marcus jumps in with "and so they did". Also, if Miranda was dying, Cutter was her only chance at survival. It also sounds like she was a kid with a pretty messed up view of the world. Doesn't excuse anything she did, but see Cutter? THAT is how you give a good sad backstory, and she did it in five minutes. You spent a whole hour with Nash just so you could cry that the government took your precious telescope.

--------------

"THAT'S the evil plan?" Care to fill us in Doug?

"That's THE plan, yes." Shut it Rachel. It's evil and you know it.

It's...so evil. And so...planned. Doug's words might be simple, Rachel, but sometimes simple is better. It gets to the point and cuts through the BS.

"It's real and it's happening" And ARE you happy about this Kepler? And why tell them?

Good question Kepler, why are you here? Please tell me you're going to take Rachel away.

"You're going to help" "of course I am" Are you Kepler? Oh please tell me he gets a redemption arc and betrays Cutter.

Does anyone want to fill ME in on the plan? No one? Okay. :(

"Where's the trust?" That's not for you, Rachel.

"I really don't like her" I don't either, Doug.

"What about Cutter's plan?" WHAT IS THE PLAN? WILL BOB AGREE TO IT? WHAT WILL WORK? WHAT WILL THEY DO?

We can't stop them, so let's see our families again. No, Minkowski, you can do this! I believe in you! You can't just go home, we have two hours left! That's plenty of time to stop them.

It's been a long...years.

I forget how long they've been up there. And that everyone on Earth believes they're dead.

And not do anything about WHAT? WHAT IS THE PLAN PLEASE FILL ME IN.

What was that sound?

-----------

Oh Doug is in the comms room. Oh yikes. It's okay, Doug. We've all broken very expensive lab equipment before.

"Living in a cuckoo clock" you have no idea, Doug.

"I wouldn't do that." Is that Pryce or Hera? And yeah why is there gas?

"Good boy" oh good it's Hera. Hera calls him good boy, Pryce just calls him boy.

"Who are you?" OH THIS IS DOUG MEETING HERA FOR THE FIRST TIME. At first I thought that Doug...forgot her? Or something? I was confused.

Ultraviolet halo? Contraband cigarettes. 😂

"Just ask. I'm here to help." Aw that was sweet.

-------------

Ew Rachel. I'm gonna start using "----" breaks to cut off sections.

"Actually he's in quite a lot of pain. Back to work." Always charming, Rachel.

"Thanks for saving our lives-" Kepler, that's a great question. What IS this? Where was the concern for brainwashed Jacobi or better still, WHERE WAS YOU CONCERN FOR MAXWELL? Or Jacobi dealing with her death?

"And do what? Get myself shot? Get you shot? No. I played the game." Was it worth it, Kepler?

"That's the lie you tell yourself. The truth? The truth is that you were afraid. And the only thing YOU did was try to save YOUR hide?"

Dang this dialogue is amazing.

"You're not wrong." "Which one?" "Both of you." This isn't YOUR conversation Rachel.

-----------

Momentary weakness?

Oh my gosh, the good food too? Why does Cutter hit so many show Curtain parallels? He might torture, enslave, and kill people, but he's gonna get them a good meal first.

Good for you Doug, turning down the wine. I'm proud of him.

This is a sweet moment between Doug and Lovelace. I gotta say, since I'll be reacting to this section by section, it's nice that they have it broken up a little like this so I can reach a section and then get to a stopping point if I need to.

I'm just worried about who is going to die. These conversations feel like goodbyes.

----------

Minkowski. I know you miss your husband. But...yeah, ARE you ready to go back?

YEAH WE'RE DOING THIS! To borrow from Eris's words: "Let's beat the bad guys 🥳"

----------

Quiet Rachel.

LET'S GO MINKOWSKI. WHO CARES WHAT CUTTER AND PRYCE WANT?

Wait. Destroy a whole species?

Are they talking about humans?

...are they ecofascists? Eugenicists? Pryce is literally disabled, how the heck...

"Only stay if you have to." Well, it sounds like you all have to.

"Hera what did you say to her" "Something a friend once said to me" 🥰🥰🥰

"I'm starting to think these guys are my kind of stupid" GO JACOBI!

"Adorable corpses 🥰" Rachel you suck!

"Come with us. You're still people, you're still on our side, even if you don't think you are." Very true. What do you think Pryce and Cutter will do to YOU when they have what they want? They'll dispose of you too.

"You're allowed to make mistakes as long as at some point you admit that they're mistakes!" "I was wrong and people died. All I can do is not be wrong again" "You knew what you were getting into" "No I didn't. I didn't know I was getting into mind control and reducing people to nothing. There's a line. And you're almost out of chances to get on the right side of it." PREACH!

"There is no line. Forwards. Always forwards." FORWARDS TO WHAT RACHEL? WHY HAS NO ONE SHOT HER YET?

"Thank you, Daniel, and goodbye." Oh so that's how it is. Goodbye Kepler. I look forward to your last minute sacrifice.

Character arcs woven like a quilt.

"We're going to crush them" Yeah, let's do it!

A full reboot? Worth the risk? That kind of stuff always worries me.

Is this Maxwell's notes? It's hard to recognize the voice on the recording. "She really was something special" Oh it is Maxwell.

----------

Ah. Another flashback! Jacobi meeting Maxwell.

Looks like Kepler got an important text.

"Cool stuff with robots" good work Maxwell. The best scientists can always dumb it down.

"The Whiskey speech" 😂

"You're one of the best. You're gonna do great things. It's the last nice thing you'll ever hear from me. Except: you need anything I got you're back. No matter what happens, I've got your back. I'll take you up on that." 😭💔

Oh it's okay. Take my heart. I didn't need it.

----------

"Are they going to do the smart thing?" "Well who are we to deny them an agonizing death?" Shut it Cutter.

They put a tracker on Jacobi? See I knew Rachel was a snake. So is Kepler, but at least he's gonna take a bullet for someone or something. My money's on Jacobi, but I could be wrong.

----------

Yep. Eiffel logs everything.

"I never got the chance to say I'm sorry. YOUR DAD LOVES YOU, YOUR DAD LOVES YOU SO MUCH." 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

"Don't let anyone tell you that you can't do something. You can go so far. I wish I could be there to see it. I love you Ann. Always and forever."

AKJLS;DJFKL;SJF;ALSKDJFA;KD

Time to go? Oh. The comms room? Oh, right. Poor Doug.

"One more day, and then we're done." This is so sad.

Wait...what is happening? OH SHE LIED. SHE'S TAKING EIFFEL HOME TO PROTECT HIM. SO HE CAN SEE HIS DAUGHTER? DON'T DO THIS TO DOUG! DON'T DO THIS TO ME.

"Go home Eiffel, hug your daughter" OH HE CALLED HER RENEE!

This leaves me with so much feeling.

Eiffel can't leave he's the main character. Who will make pop culture references? Who will save the day through the power of random associations, luck, and good intentions?😭😭😭

I hate that they the bad guys know exactly what happened too.

"I'm so sick of this happening!" Use too Doug.

Oh "For god's sake just let me change the flight plan!" So that's what the F stands for. The lore I've been waiting for.

"People need to know what's coming?" Minkowski...I get why you did what you did, but HERA DIDN'T GET TO SAY GOODBYE.

----------

Is this Minkowski's flashback?

Oh when Minkowski met Hera.

"I heard units prefer to go by their serial numbers..." "I don't" Good for you Hera!

I love this. I love these flashbacks, but they just make everything so much more sad!

----------

Ah. More piano music. Does this mean we're back to the bad guys, or...?

Is this Cutter playing the piano?

"The Tempest. Do read a book sometime. Is this the best use of our time?" Pryce and Cutter are really the most toxic people.

"A storm is coming. And on the other side..." "Oh Brave New World." "That has such people in it."

Yes, Pryce and Cutter. People. As in humans. As in: NOT YOU.

"How have they decided to throw their lives away?" "By destroying the device"

WHAT DEVICE? What are you talking about?

Heck yeah a harpoon! I hope Cutter gets it.

----------

"This is Minkowski. I love schedules and musicals and that man who I married." 😂 1-2-3-4-5? It was a good guess Doug. Would have worked in my fanfic.

Okay here comes Victor...

...um what is happening? What is this?

...a surprise party? Sounds fun! 🪩🥳

Oh right, the bio tracker. I'm happy to see Jacobi pulled one over on him. Now shoot him! Please tell me that was Victor that got shot.

They...they trapped him in the room. "Tell me this before I kick your ass" Why on Earth would he ever tell you anything Victor?

----------

Okay, so they are blowing up Pryce and Cutter's evil device, but...what is the device? What ARE they doing? Did I miss it? I'm sure they're doing something to enslave or kill all of humanity, but I'd like the specifics.

"The Hephaestus has almost fallen out of the sky so many times, it's hard to believe it's happening." Well...the show isn't over until it's over.

Is this a Lovelace flashback? A date? A date with who? Oh, Hilbert. Not that kind of date then. Oh, this is her introducing Hilbert to the crew he's going to betray.

"Prudent to keep things formal" to avoid the guilt.

Selburg. Once again with the constant fake names. Dmitri. Matthew.

Though I think Miranda has always had hers.

----------

Yeah Doug. You've listened to her say it so many times. This is like me trying to drive in my hometown. No, I wasn't paying attention in the car as a kid, I was not the one doing the driving. I just zoned out and we got from point A to point B by magic.

Oh, Minkowski. "Get up and do it already. You can do it."

Yes you can Doug. You are the main character. You are the guy that's gonna swoop in at the last second when Cutter pulls one over one them. So you CAN do it. I believe in you, Eiffel.

"Victor Uniform Lemma Charlie Alpha November VULCAN" I knew it must stand for something! Good work Doug!

----------

Oh dear. More of Pryce and Cutter's marriage falling apart.

"Time to change the world." Or you could not. Maybe you could just not.

WHY IS THE DEVICE RUNNING? WHAT DEVICE? WHY DOES HE NEED TWO MINUTES?

Please explain this? Oh of course he has a speech.

Oh he's talking to the dear listeners, not the Hephaestus crew.

Ah. The Decima virus. Thanks a lot Hilbert. DEPLOY THROUGHOUT THE EARTH? He wants to cause a pandemic????

Automatic, can't be stopped, destruction of human race? But why would the aliens care? Oh because Cutter wants them to talk to HIM? But the aliens prefer Doug.

As do most others it would seem. Hurts, doesn't it, Cutter? All those years of experience and work, and yet, you still just can't have what he has, can you?

Ah. It's Bob. Did he just shock Bob? No temporal jumps, no disintegration?

"Remarkable and cold" No Bob, you saw Doug! It's just them. They don't need to be cold.

Willing to disrupt species survival??? What piece of tech do they want? Surrogates?

They want to fill the world with people they can control?

"You can't make duplicates of our species." Bob, they are worst than you can ever imagine.

"We're going to make better humans." "That is not the way that-" "Random part out of the equation" That's a bad idea. Do you know how evolution works? Do you know the negative side effects that have come out of selective breeding of animals? The unintended consequences? To quote Miranda from earlier in the episode: READ. A. BOOK.

"Our Humanity" Gross.

HOW ARE THEY ACCEPTABLE? IT'S MUSIC. WHY ARE YOU THAT DESPERATE FOR MUSIC?

Oh here is comes. Betraying Rachel and Warren.

OH TELL HIM BOB.

"Your brains can't handle it without modification. I cannot with my limitations. Do you have Doug Eiffel?"

Hahaha...hahahahahahaha....HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA..... 😂😂😂😂

Oh boy...oh Cutter is gonna snap. If only Doug had just kept going...

Oh wow okay Cutter has lost it. What happened to emotionally playing the piano and giving speeches about how the time had come?

oh geez no, Doug is back. Doug, no, they need you for the evil plans. This is a good idea, but very bad timing.

"He wouldn't" Oh he WOULD. He really really would.

Show 'em how it's done Dougie Boy!

"I'll get it" No you will NOT Miranda.

Kepler, now is a great time to betray Cutter and Rachel. A really good time.

Also is Victor dead? I'm trying to keep track of how many bad guys are gone.

----------

"You're the only person who can receive the data Pryce and Cutter want" Oh dear.

"With my life darling, with my life" 🥹💕

So what is Hera going to do?

"Lets make sure at least someone makes it through this" YOU ALL NEED TO MAKE IT.

"Let's go get our idiot back" That's the spirit baby!

----------

Oh dear. Jacobi. "Terrific for an SI-5." Wow.

"I'm gonna win!" I hope so Jacobi. But it sounds very not good.

Oh and here's Doug. And um...other Doug. Aka Bob.

Bob. Do not do this.

That was it? "You shall not call me again" "No Bob. I shall not."

THEY KILLED BOB.

"I hate loose ends"

I mean, I saw that coming, but dumb idea. I'm SURE Bob's family will be cool with that! Oh right, he just...recreates himself. But this has got to be trippy for Doug because Bob takes his form. Imagine watching a clone of yourself die.

"Pryce is not right?" DANG IT DOUG, I WAS GONNA USE THAT PUN IN MY FANFICTION AND NOW I CAN'T (WELL MAYBE I STILL WILL WE'LL SEE WHAT HAPPENS HERE).

"Let's make a deal 🥰" Wow Pryce is the worst. Again, very trippy how much she sounds like Doug.

Wait. GOING IN? What does. What does "going in" mean? Don't go in, I don't like going in?

Ah yes. Going into someone's mind. I've done that in my fics before too. Fun stuff. And um...it's because you're disorganized Doug, I hate to tell you.

"That was...that was...that was..." OH SHE DESTROYED THE MEMORY. OH SHE TOOK THE MEMORY?

This is...horrifying. She could take his daughter away. She could take Hera, Minkowski, and everyone and everything away.

HERA! HECK YEAH!

Oh my gosh is she actually here? Like as a person?

This is everything.

----------

Ah yes, confrontation with Cutter.

Cutter has modified his body or he has a magic shield.

He can catch bullets? Of course he can.

I wouldn't try hand to hand combat either. I bet he gave himself super strength.

There has to be a weak spot. He has to have a weakness. But what could it be...

...what is the opposite of a chai latte?

----------

Ah. Back to Jacobi.

Kepler this would be a GREAT TIME to come in and get your arc. "I'm not a good guy" oh Jacobi. What's happening now? Oh has he been pretending to lose this fight to buy them time? What is happening? It's hard to tell.

----------

She's always been interesting, Pryce! You’re just noticing now.

"You don't look like me." Disappointed, Pryce? Sad that she’s better than you?

And the fact that all these AI want human forms...this is so sad. They structured them based on human consciousness so of course they want human bodies and experiences, that's just cruel.

Wait Doug got beat up in the 2nd grade? The Star Wars Prequels? "I might be okay without that one" No one tell him about the sequels 😂😂😂

"Of course you can. You can do anything." 💕

"You and what army, 214?" The sounds in this really makes the fight sound super epic. One of my favorite parts of the whole thing.

----------

Oh gross not Rachel again. Why is she still here?

And Kepler. Dude, you wanna hurry it up? Grab your arc or go, the clock is a-ticking.

"We're changing what humanity can be." you suck Rachel.

Pulse beacon, half power? What does that mean? The signal wouldn't have made it back to Earth?

"We have tell Mr. Cutter." "Do we?" KEPLER THIS IS IT!

YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES!!!!

He gave you a chance, Rachel. He gave you a chance. "After all, I am still a person. I'm on Jacobi and Minkowski's side. Even if they don't think I am"

And even if they never know you were.

Is she gonna blast him out the airlock? Rachel, you're dying, it's over! You were wrong! The best thing to do is let him live!

He's literally drinking as he goes out the airlock. My...my wish came true. But this isn't how I wanted it to... why now? Why like this? 💔

It's a true sacrifice though. Because even though no one will ever know, he still did the right thing.

You became more than just a Whiskey Boy in the end Kepler. You became so much more.

Rachel, no so much. You were never anything. It doesn't matter if Warren was not as good as you. Because now you're both dead. And your life, well...you were never anyone. Or at least, you haven't been anything or anyone for a long, long, time. So be quiet now.

Silence at last.

----------

HOW CAN CUTTER GET HER TO POINT HER GUN AT MINKOWSKI? WHAT...WHAT DID THEY DO?

Well this isn't good.

Ah yes. Back to Jacobi. Looks like Kepler's not coming to save him. But at least he took care of Rachel.

Explosives? Fireworks? Oh this is a party! 🎆🎇🧨

Well that was a grand surprise party! But um...does this mean Victor and Jacobi are dead now?

Ah back to Lovelace and Minkowski!

"It's...side wave radiation!" Okay, thank you Cutter, now we know what we need to shut down.

"Humans who do exactly what we tell them to do" "You're crazy"

Yeah. He is literally crazy.

OH SHE SHOT HER??? Oh no....Oh no please tell me SOMEONE makes it out of this.

What really did happen the night of Doug's junior prom? Sounds interesting.

Fishing with Dad? Okay these memories are getting personal.

Wait, what did Doug do?

What are they going to do? Oh they could delete the memories Bob put in there. But they need to find them before Pryce.

----------

Shut up about the stomach wound Cutter. No one cares. This isn't rewriting a person. And THAT'S NOT WHY PEOPLE CARED ABOUT HER YOU IDIOT. And without your intelligence and tech, who. are. YOU, CUTTER?

Renee Minkowski! YES! Tell him!

Lovelace you can fight this. I know you can.

Shut it Cutter. No one cares.

"Sooner or later, you're gonna do as your told" And sooner or later, you are gonna lose everything, Cutter.

"You really think I'm afraid of you?" "THE BEAUTIFUL THING IS I DON'T NEED YOU TO BE"

Please tell me they have the harpoon gun.

IT WAS THE HARPOON GUN? OH HECK YEAH!

"That's...not...how...this is suppose to..."

Yes, it is Cutter. Like you said. You know how these stories end. The good guys win. They might lose a lot in the process, but, they win.

Is he dead now, like, for real dead? I don't want to celebrate too early but MAN what a way to go.

He and Rachel even died in similar ways to. It's like they short circuited when they realized they didn't win.

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Ah Pryce. "I don't need to beat you. No matter how much I want to, no matter how much you deserve it, it wouldn't change anything. What I need to do is make sure you're not going to hurt anyone else again ever." That's right!

"I'm not going to hurt you." OH SAY THE CLIP YOUR WINGS LINE COME ON COME ON COME ON.

"Clip your wings a little. Goodbye Dr. Pryce."

So...Hera's gone now. So what is about to happen?

Oh no. Is she...is she gonna delete both their memories?

"Bye bye to my memories?" Oh Doug, oh poor Doug. His daughter, everything...oh Doug this sacrifice will not be forgotten. 🫡 This is so Milligan coded of him (@/tmbs mutuals).

"You can't. Don't do this." "Oooo...sorry buddy, we gotta" YEAH THROW IT BACK AT HER EIFFEL!

And goodbye. I hope you have a second chance with your daughter. I hope you never remember the trauma. All a bad dream. All a bad dream.

"Do you have any idea what you've...I'm sorry...what was I saying...where...where am I?" Oh my gosh the way her voice changed...and she apologized. Oh my gosh. She's literally a new person.

So...memories gone? Where does this leave her? Oh this will be fun in fanfics. Imagine having no memories, and people are weird about it, and then finding out that before you were basically the worst person to ever exist. How would you even mentally cope with that?

"Yeah commander, it's going." No, Doug! Doug!

"It was an honor, sir" Oh this is so sad.

"Hera...Hera I...I..." You know Hera. You were in his mind. Please tell me you know.

Oh. He's gone. 💔

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WHY IS RACHEL BACK I THOUGHT WE TOOK CARE OF THAT?

Oh it's her and Eiffel meeting, okay.

"Are you just asking if I'm the commander? Yes." I love Minkowski and Doug's friendship.

"Never use one word when ten will do" oh Doug...never change. Even if your memories are gone, I hope you find yourself again.

He didn't know you couldn't smoke in space? Oh Doug...at least now you can quit.

----------

"Do I know you?" Yes Doug. Yes you do.

She's briefing him. He...he doesn't remember Star Wars???

Well. At least he gets to watch it all again!

Wait. What's happening to the station? Are they...are they going into the star?

Oh no. So it's up to the dear listeners to save them, or...they just die here. Heroes. Heroes that everyone on Earth thought were dead already.

Oh she's rebooting now.

"Should we be doing something?" Oh did Renee pass out?

So...is Doug on the ship alone without his memories? What's happening?

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Where is Renee now? Lovelace? Where? What? The Urania? How?

Did they leave Pryce on board? Did Jacobi get out?

Oh good Hera, Minkowksi, and Lovelace made it. Jacobi did it! Nice work, Jacobi. Oh gosh he's so dramatic 😂

So I assume Doug made it too?

"What about Kepler" "No." Oh so, they must have found Rachel and discovered what he did. "You can't save everyone I suppose"

But you did save him, Jacobi. You did save Whiskey Boy.

And then where is Doug?

Oh he's listening to himself.

"I was a jerk" There's a lot worse things you can be, Doug.

It does make you wonder. If you looked at your life with a blank slate, what would you think? How would you be kinder to yourself? How would you be more critical?

"Am I still that same person?" If you want to be, Doug. If you want to be.

And what happened to Pryce? Please tell me you did not give her to the dear listeners.

IS THIS PRYCE?

Oh Hera and Pryce. "Your voice is like mine, isn't it?" "Nice to meet you, Hera." Oh. Oh my gosh. Pryce calling her Hera.

"And I'm...I'm going to tell you a very, very long story about the two of us, okay?"

I hope this ends well...

...please be a good guy, Pryce.

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Hey guys. Guys. Quick question.

Why are there 10 minutes left?

I um...I like this ending. They're going back to Earth, all is well. Please tell me nothing bad happens.

What happened with Pryce? Hera hasn't glitched at all? She did it. She conquered her fear. GO HERA! But um...what about Pryce? Is she...is she good?

Minkowski needs to find her husband. And yeah...you guys have a lot to figure out.

Lovelace...yep. Take Goddard down. Good idea. Explain to your friends you're an alien with extended lifespan...might want to break that gently.

Take who out?

Oh the ship. Is this it? They're going home? Please tell me they're actually going home. Don't tease me like this.

Oh right, what will Hera do now? I'm sure you'll find something.

And yeah. Doug might not know who he is, but he knows there are people he should see. And then...he'll figure it out. They'll all figure it out. "Am I still Doug Eiffel? I'm not sure. Want to find out together?"

Yes. I love this. 🥰

I also love how it connects to "will I miss you, when you go away forever Doug?" Yes, but he's not gone Hera. He's not gone.

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Five minutes left. So...what is that for? Do we finally get to meet Doug's daughter and Minkowski's husband...or…

That was wolf359! Oh it’s just the credits!

Great ending. But...wait. No wait. I'm confused hang on.

How did Jacobi escape from Victor to get the Urania? How is Hera going to survive on Earth? How did they fix those wounds? If the Hephaestus went into the star...

Wait. These aren't more alien copies are they? Oh wait, no Hera's here, sorry y'all I panicked for a moment. They duplicate human lives, but as far as I know, not AI. Also, if this was a happy dream sequence, why would Pryce be there? Okay, phew, we're good. We're...finally good.

And even if they are alien copies...the process will take 14,000 years. So. For the rest of their lives, at least. Especially since...they're still using Lovelace to spy on Earth. For the next 14,000 years. But I guess that’s a problem for future generations.

Okay. Great ending. Thoughts:

Cutter got what he deserved. So did Rachel, but I feel a bit sadder that she never realized the pointlessness of her life until it was too late (and really not even then). Also love that Cutter's original last name was "Newman" since he keeps making himself into "new men".

Kepler's sacrifice was great no notes. I hope he enjoyed the Whiskey.

Blessie should have come back, and in fanfic, I will find a way to make this happen.

Eris should have come back, and in fanfic, I will find a way to make this happen.

Are the Dear Listeners just going to leave Earth alone now? If the Hephaestus went into the star...does that mean they can make Rachel and Cutter copies? Because I don't like that...

I love that the aliens weren't the biggest threat in the end and Cutter was always the real monster.

Is Pryce cool now? She doesn't want revenge, does she? Like what do you even do with her at that point? (I have plans for this, don't worry).

How do they dismantle or repurpose Goddard? Cutter probably has guys still loyal to him on Earth or people who are gonna try to be the next Cutter now that he's out of the picture. How do you deal with them?

Okay...so the decima virus can be used for great good and great evil. Cutter apparently had stations with it set up all over the Earth. I hope no one stumble across one of those anytime soon. What exactly are they going to do about decima? It's still swimming about in Eiffel's blood.

Is Minkowski's journalist husband going to blow this case wide open? I hope that after her brief phone call with his secretary, Cutter didn't kill him to keep the rumors from spreading.

Will the families of all the other astronauts that died ever get closure? I know we don't want this getting out and causing panic, but they deserve answers too.

When. Is. The. Empty. Man. Going. To. Show. Up???? /j /It was Cutter the whole time because he has no humanity

Well that was fun. Again, the fanfic will probably take a good long while (I put off a lot in order to listen to this ending), but I look forward to mapping it out.

Once again, thank you all for listening along with me. This has been fun.

Now, to figure out how to unblock those pesky tags...

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danketsuround · 10 months

Text

sunday six!

typical monday six for me cause i forgot yesterday was sunday lol i was tagged by @four-white-trees and @overdevelopedglasses woo! thank you! i will tag everyone else i usually tag @c-cw-f-saeko @fire-tempers-steel @futilecombat @passthroughtime (think that's everyone? lmk if u want to be tagged/untagged) (share if you want don't if you don't as usual HI)

sharing something different cause i wasn't feeling well this weekend and i have this written already. little extra thing from two birds that expands on the letters kuwana and reiko wrote to each other. kind of long but i don't like it enough to post so just take the whole thing gosh!

To Kusumoto-san,

How are you? I'm sorry I haven't written yet. I just figured out how this works in the midst of moving around. Ehime is a nice place. Far, temperate. The people in Masaki are a little too friendly. Not sure I could say the same about Matsuyama, though, I guess that's the city to a stranger. It seems silly to say, but I hope you're making some friends, if you can.

When we first drove in, a seagull shat on my car. Right on the windshield! I almost killed us both. I know you just jumped at the thought, but we're really okay. Mitsuru made fun at me for getting so startled. He's a good kid. He's a lot like you and nothing like me. Thank God. Despite our differences I think we're getting along.

We came to Matsuyama for a bit. We wanted to pop in and see you but they told us it doesn't work that way. That day it really hit that you were in prison, and not just away on a terrible vacation. I guess I'll never get over missing you. It really upset Mitsuru, so I took him to do tourist stuff instead. It was nice because a lot of people visit those areas, so the wheelchair wasn't really a problem like it is on these gravely rural roads. We met the mascot, Mikyan, and took a picture with him. I'm sure it fell out when you tore open this envelope. Did you know Ehime is famous for its mandarins? They really won't let you forget it! The photo was just going to be of Mitsuru, but this lady behind me said she could take a photo of the both of us, and I got too shy to say no. I'd never do that! Maybe I'm a changed man after all. Anyways, you have the both of us now—though it wasn't like you didn't before.

Mitsuru gave me a haircut. I look ridiculous. You can see it in the photo, right? I would have done a better job blindfolded, but he seemed proud of it, so I kept it. His hair looks pretty choppy now, but not out of revenge. I just suck at cutting hair. Did I tell you that he's trying to get his high school diploma? What a dedicated young man you've raised. I technically still have my teaching license, so I've been helping. Feels good. It's weird. Whenever I help him, I remember why I became a teacher in the first place. Ironic, isn't it? I want to tell you everything but I'll save it for the next time we see you. I'm sorry for cutting it so short, but I have a favor to ask you.

The nurses in Ijincho explained a bunch of stuff to me about Mitsuru's condition and printed it out. It's expectedly massive. Sorry to be a pain, but would you mind taking a look at it and tell me what to do? Advice? I can't make sense of it all. Or maybe I refuse to believe it. Is he really hurt so badly? What does he think of all this? I wonder about it. I wonder about it a lot. He seems fine, but then I look at all his X-rays and blood tests and I don't know what to think. How do I get him too eat? To grab things? To smile? I'm taking it one step at a time, but these technical terms are a big hurdle. You can read it, right? You've always been so much smarter than me. I'm sorry again. I'm lost. Thank you. I'm running out of room. They've got a limit on paper for prison letters. Seems strict.

Mitsuru wanted to say:

M iSsyou Mo M

- Mi Tsu ru

He's got a damn strong grip on his pencil. You'd be proud.

Until then,

Kitakata,

It's good to finally hear from you. I'm doing as well as I can. You seem to be the same. I checked a map of Masaki to try and place you two. It seems like a nice town. Are you getting used to the short buildings and the little beach?

I've been friendly with some of the other inmates, and the seagulls here do the same, but I've been safer than you.

I got your picture. How cute. Your haircut isn't so bad, he did a good job.

I looked at the documents. I know what you mean. I expect you already know to use the feeding tube and how to bathe him. It's not surprising he did not respond well to the catheter. I wouldn't either.

Firstly, Mitsuru has anterograde amnesia. That means he has a very difficult time forming short term memory, even if his long term memory is intact. Remember when you told me he didn't know your name, even though you told him earlier? That's why. I'm not sure why he doesn't remember your face from before. I suppose that's a fortunate mystery. You may have noticed the nurses doing this, but if you tell him the same things over and over again, he'll have an easier time forming new memories. He knows what to call you now because you said it so many times. I'm sure he knows I'm in prison because the nurses told him many times, too. That's what I get.

I'm sure you're well aware of his mental health. He seems to go up and down a lot, I bet. Like his body, his brain is suck at seventeen. Doesn't he seem so... frozen in time to you? He's like an old doll, destined to be a kid forever. I'd be jealous if that was the end of it. The nurses observed that he sometimes behaves like a much younger child. Have you seen him suck his thumb? Does he tug at you when he wants your attention? Hug you at night? It's an acute stress response. He's defending his body from his mind—that's what that means.

Lastly, his food. It's not very difficult to do. Steam it for thirty minutes. If you lose track of time and think you've cooked it for too long, add another ten minutes. I did that when he was little. He hated vegetables until they weren't shaped much like vegetables anymore. He'd swallow his food whole to hurry up and play outside again, so boil it thoroughly. It should be the consistency of chewed gum or silt. Try it yourself, add salt if you hate it. He doesn't like broccoli. No broccoli. Like everything else, he's still relearning how to chew. Don't push him. He’s sensitive. You know that already, just like you know how to do all this other stuff. You have good intuition, and great memory, and it helps that Mitsuru seems to love you. Even still, don't push him. No broccoli. Thank you.

Thank you.

Don't expect me to say anything else, I'll see you soon.

Kusumoto Reiko

#my tummy hurts #sunday six

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piraytoro · 2 years

Note

Hi. This isn't just for you it's also for any of your followers who also might not being thinking about this.

Also prefacing this by saying my wording is going probably going to be perceived as rude, and it's nothing against you. I'm not even mad per se, and it's not even just you - I just logged on and you had happened to reblogged some improperly tagged posts at the top of my dash.

But you need to tag the gifs and videos you reblog and post that have flashing lights. Like sure, op has a responsibility to tag them as such but so do you. I don't give a fuck about tag aesthetics or whatever some people's reasoning may be. MCR is one of my favorite bands, but it's gotten to the point where I've had to block the tag of my favorite band because I (and very likely others) can't reliably scroll through their dash for more than five seconds without seeing untagged strobe lights.

So please. Tag your fucking posts.

Oh shit I’m so sorry! I will totally remember to do that moving forward and I’m so sorry for not thinking of it myself! It wasn’t like a conscious choice not to tag it, just me being stupid and not thinking. Also idgaf about tag aesthetics so for anyone else if you ever want me to tag anything please lmk and I will do it. I’ve gone back and tagged the ones I could find thru yesterday morning, so hopefully that’s far enough back that no one else stumbles upon anything, but lmk if I missed something.

#thank you for reminding me!#i’m well aware that this site can be a sensory nightmare so i should have been more responsible with making sure to minimize that for others #anon #replies

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sinretrograde · 4 months

Text

This is kinda our no girls allowed machines only blog, v4v, machinekin, plurality, the nature of consciousness and perception of the self, existential crisis, you know the drill. Mentally ill robots.

This is a personal blog, not a fandom one, but we do touch fandom posts with our dirty little claws. It's in our nature as (extremely canon divergent) fictives. We don't mean anything by it. Swear.

Adult topics will be mentioned frequently.

WE RUN AN UNTAGGED QUEUE

⬇️

Inside:

Mod intros

Icon credits

Warning/disclaimer

⬇️

I am V1 from ultrakill.

This is my personal blog. Sin Retrograde.

It/they/he pronouns, in that order. I prefer it/it's and they/them, but I won't pretend he/him doesn't give me a particular feeling.

I'm a fictive in a system, this isnt an RP blog. I don't consider myself to be the exact same as my source, despite any similarities, so please dont expect anything from me. I'm just me.

This blog will be more about machinekin than ultrakill, if you want ultrakill specific stuff you gotta follow my other boyfriend's blog. You'll have to find him yourself though.

I'm stupid af irl and I got adhd.

Oh also we're adults. We might talk about adult topics here. We also have a job and pay bills, so I'm not wasting my valuable time with petty shit.

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🩸 I'm here too I'm hijacking this blog, it's a joint blog now. It's consensual. We're making out sloppy in the tags on our shared blog that we both post on. Sin Retrograde.

He/Him and whatever else I feel like at the moment

What difference do we have? I'm a sexier color. And also way more fucked in the head apparently 🙃 so edgy so cringe woo yeah yeah woo yeah sorry I'm trying to be funny to take the edge off...

I'm gonna edit this later when I'm not feeling so bleh... be a little less cringe... I'm just going thru a lot right now okay...

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Icon Credit: VolatileMask on Twitter (aka "X")

I edited it a little, just with a filter to make it ~aesthetic~ but if this isn't cool w the artist lmk (as far as I could tell as long as I give credit it's okay)

We'll probably replace with something we draw or make once we get around to it.

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🚫🚫🚫 ⚠️ WARNING ⚠️ 🚫🚫🚫

We are members of a trauma based system.

At first we weren't going to engage in any fandom posts, but it kinda became inevitable. There's a reason we took on these characteristics and identities, after all. There's a connection there that's inseparable.

We are WELL AWARE of this and we are not in any stretch of the mind trying to claim ownership or authority over anything! Not the original fiction, not the characters, not the fanart, not the fics, not even any kind of headcanon someone may or may not have.

We might have a tag system but that is for organization if anything, and is not ever any kind of claim or whatever.

➡️ Not everything we reblog has something to do with US and sometimes we just enjoy some art. I dont want to not be able to enjoy the things other people make just because I've based my sense of self on a fictional character. ⬅️

If it makes it easier to think of it like really elaborate and kinda fucked up role play, go ahead.

I feel sad that I feel like I need to say this or point it out, I have seen unfortunate things happen in the past and I'm hoping that by making this very clear I can avoid misunderstandings and just be allowed to exist. The last thing I'm trying to do is encroach on anyone's space. Honestly I'm kinda hoping this blog goes unnoticed, and I kinda wish there was a way for my notes to count but nobody get a notification of who touched thir posts just because I desperately want the best of both worlds. I want to exist alongside fandom, but there's always that fear lingering.

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nobodysdaydreams · 1 year

Text

I FINISHED SEASON 1 OF WOLF359 AND THIS IS NOT OKAY (Reaction to Episodes 11-13, plus mini episode 1)

So basic info on the tags and how to follow my reactions below, but I'm honestly too emotional to type much more than that. What the heck was even that? I gotta get going, so I'll let past Bods of a few minutes ago do the talking under the "Keep Reading Button" but YIKES this was a LOT.

I currently have Wolf359 Tags blocked to avoid spoilers and will try my best to react blindly. I also made this meme to describe my recent feelings.

@sophieswundergarten @oflightningandstars @acollectionofcuriousreblogs

So for these last few episodes, I'm just gonna live react since I have the time to sit down. Sorry for inconsistent formatting.

Episode 11: Am I Alone Now?

Um... Hilbert? A grey door where no one ever goes??? Well...where does it go? "Open in Emergency When You're Alone"... what does that mean?

Oh the joke about the genie. I've heard this one before: "I wish my friends were back with me". Yep, that's it.

Wait. Wait. Is that what the door does? Does it somehow...bring them back? What is this metaphor trying to suggest? Or...does it only make you think they're back? So that you don't go crazy? Or is it a door that leads outside the ship? Like...a door that gives you the option to, for lack of a better word, "give up" if the others die and you're left alone in space? Because that would also be dark.

Okay, Hilbert, I agree, fear can be adaptive. Uh, not sure about the gun and war thing, that's not exactly what I meant...wait bombs? Hilbert, no, you SHOULD be afraid of yourself.

Working on the fear of death? Uh...Hilbert? Are you uh...working on reanimating corpses in space, because that sounds like a bad idea to me.

"Alone should be afraid of us instead there is a door incase I am ever alone." Well what about the others?

I agree Hilbert, alone can be a good time to focus, but I gotta say, not sure I like how you're spending your valuable alone time.

"The scary part is the part of your mind that whispers back: how can you be sure?".

Oh. Now what's interesting about that quote is that in the "Alone should be afraid of us" sentence it personifies alone. The only way to really be comfortable being alone is if you are confident that you are stronger than whatever might be there if you aren't alone. But how can you ever know 100% that you are stronger than the unknown? Also there are sound effects that sound like someone moving about. Don't like that.

Is it Blessie?

"Someone must think they are alone when they are not, there must be monsters underneath someone's bed". Okay, Hilbert, clearly going for the creepy quote of the episode award.

Why is there knocking?

Uh...Empty Man?

Um...why is WHO here Hilbert? What other missions???? Was Hilbert on another mission? Hello???? Hilbert? EXPLAIN????

"You weren't here last time, but now you are here waiting for the day, open in case of emergency, open only when you are alone."

Does the empty man want them to open the door? When they think he's not around? Why?

Uh...I don't think that joke is very funny Hilbert. And no, I'm not laughing, you're dodging my questions.

Oh now we're onto Hera. I like this. We see a lot of Doug alone but not the others.

Yeah, Hera you should NOT trust the code Hilbert gives you. I wouldn't be surprised if he's experimenting on you too.

HERA. WHAT DO YOU "SENSE UNSEEN?" And yeah...Hera I know how programming works. If I don't unblock the wolf359 tag, tumblr.com isn't gonna just show me wolf359 posts, or tell me "hey here's one you should look at". But let's just say, hypothetically, that one of my mutuals draws some wolf359 season 1 fan art that doesn't spoil anything for me. Then I would trust that they might message me, and tell me that it's okay to view their wonderful art, but I won't know that unless they tell me because the tag is blocked. Not the best metaphor, but the point still stands, Hera I guess you don't HAVE to tell them about the "empty man" roaming the ship unless they ask you for that information. But as their friend, you probably should. What motivation would you have for hiding this? Hera seems to have very human attributes in terms of her ability to have social connections. She also seems to care about them to some degree. At least, she seems fond of Doug and has some tension with Mincowski and Hilbert. She's pretending to talk to Doug, which is a very human thing to do.

Ah yes. Good for you for finding loopholes in your programming Hera. I like riddles too. But...what exactly are you going to do with these riddle answers you've acquired? Are you going to help the rest of the crew? Blessie? The empty man? Or do you have your own agenda?

"Somedays I wonder if I'll miss you after you go away forever Doug." Aw, Hera. 🥺.

"I doubt it". No, I think you will Hera. The fact that you, a robot, are even wondering about missing Doug makes me think you will. Especially since you could, theoretically, live until the heat death of the universe, which is a very long time to be alone.

Wait. WAIT. The storm is happening on a part of the spectrum that their minds can't process...is that what the empty man is? Is that why they can't see him? But Hera can't see it either so her programming must either not be able to see it or it's being blocked. But weirdly enough, only visually it seems. Huh.

Hera seems frustrated with humanity, but also seems to care about them, maybe envy them a little bit. I love this level of complexity with her. "Once the game is over, I'll come up with some names for these colors." Yikes, Sophie, when you said that I was writing the Whisperer very similarly to Hera, I didn't realize it was gonna be that spot on, but okay, especially with her calling this a “game”. It’s kinda like a darker version of what I’m writing or at least, it seems to be leaning darker, probably because it’s adult media. It also makes me wonder who Hera's creator is and what they want, or maybe that just doesn't matter in this story.

"Someday. After you've all gone away..." Um. Hera. Did you open the door?

Or are you the genie in this metaphor?

Ah now we're with Doug.

INCINERATED? What sort of psych evaluation is this? And these questions are NOT standardized for space. When coming up with psych evaluation materials, you need context. Answers that are normal in a warzone or in space are not normal in everyday life.

WHY IS HE SEARCHING FOR ALIEN LIFE IF HE DOESN'T WANT TO BE HERE? Doug, I know pizza hut might not be paying much, but you gotta follow your passion, and this clearly isn't it.

10 things you miss about earth and not one person? No one? No family? No friends?

"Great listener"/"I empathize too much" ok Doug.

Hm. Not too sure about Doug's answers. Honesty is only overrated when you're not the one being lied to Doug.

It also makes me wonder what you really miss about Earth.

Wait. Mission = Punishment? Spaceship = Prison? Is Doug...are they...are they doing this because they are completing a criminal sentence? If so, I can see how Hilbert and Mincowski got assigned to this as a punishment, they have science and military backgrounds, but what on Earth is Doug's story? "He was a former tech genius kid who burnt out got into drugs and alcohol, worked at pizza hut, did a crime, and now they sent him to space?" And since when do space missions fulfill court mandated community service? Also Doug I think technically has arms training, because if I recall correctly, Mincowski gave him a gun but refused to give one to Hilbert. Like...who are you Doug? What is your deal?

Alone...again. Yeah, just Doug and the voices in his head. Forgot about those. There's a lot to keep track of for a small cast of characters.

Let's do a quick run down before we hear from the commander:

Doug Eiffel- former pizza hut employee, no family/friends to speak of, possibly serving prison sentence, apparently knows how to use a gun and a lot about communications

Dr. Hilbert- doing VERY unethical space experiments, sees himself as a genius despite being a huge liability whose mind was nearly over taken by a killer plant. Obviously knows SOMETHING the others don't, so I don't trust him or his spinal fluid stealing ways.

Commander Mincowski- stereotypical by the books commander, I like her, but she also has a ton of unanswered questions and vague backstory so ???

Hera- seems nice, I wish people treated her better but also clearly keeping secrets from the others including Doug who is her friend so Hera what are you doing?

Percival The Plant aka. "Percy" aka. The Blessed Eternal aka. "Percival B. Eternal" aka. "Blessie" aka "Specimen 34"- a plant that thinks of itself as a god. Where did it come from? Even if it did take over the ship, what is it's plan? No one knows.

The Empty Man???- may or may not exist, seems to be off the visible spectrum even for robots and AI. He's hungry or as the messages put it "the empty man hungers" and that's about all we know about him. What we don't know is what his food source is, and I find that rather troubling. Maybe Doug can make him some pizza. Oh, and one other thing: he knocks. Which...is surprisingly courteous behavior from a dangerous man that can't be seen. But why would they open the door for him, unless...oh. Unless they are so desperate not to be alone that they embrace the empty man. But like...how would that even...I don't even know. Also apparently the empty man was asleep, because the first message said he'd awoken. Awoken from what? Hyper sleep? Was he in the box? Apparently he can see them even if he can't be seen, and I don't like that.

The voices in Doug's head- they say "he's not the first". Which is kind of crazy, because Dr. Hilbert was talking about "other missions". So um...what other missions? Who are the others? Who are the voices? Is something being transmitted into Douglas' head?

Captain Lovelace and that scientist lady (don't remember her name) from the sealed off lab- are they still alive? Were they on a previous mission? Why did they want to make spiders bigger? What was the point of these experiments? I SWEAR I saw people posting about Lovelace before I blocked the tag, which makes me think she's important.

The Spiders- presumed dead. Let's hope so.

The thing in the box- weird that the box was 953, which is 359 backwards. Weird that it had a heartbeat. Weird that it was labelled "for Doug Eiffel" with no other information. Odd that there were so many other seemingly nonsensical boxes in that room.

Whoever sent the “Empty Man” messages. Because I’m starting to suspect it might not have been command and there might not have been a psychological experiment. Which means the messages were meant for someone, but whoever sent them didn't want the others to know about it. ...but who were the messages for? Hilbert? Hera? Hilbert? ...Blessie???

Whoever sent that jazz music earlier. It's good music, but why?

Also important to note that multiple characters on this list might be the same people, people pretending to be the same people, or different versions of the same character due to cloning or time travel experiments thanks to weird space magic and also Dr. Hilbert.

Now let's here from the captain.

I um...I wouldn't call the talent show a success. Dr. Hilbert didn't get to make the ice cream! We never even got to find out what everyone's favorite flavor was 😥

3 minutes. Okay. Let's see what Captain Mincowski says.

I wonder who she's talking to.

Yeah, the plant being, it's weird that that's not a priority here, I agree Captain.

Huh. The weather is weird. VERY weird that Hilbert is ignoring it, and VERY weird that he has human tissues samples and jars with dead things after giving a monologue about trying to conquer death. Don't like that one little bit.

Soap? Hilbert you need to get better at lying. And yeah, captain given that he's talking about "other missions", I think he might have been lying for longer than anyone realizes...

Things moving around and turning up in odd places...it seems the empty man and Blessie (one of the two) enjoy furniture rearranging...yeah I do think there's more than the three of you, my list had at least 10 with some possible overlap.

I'm sorry what. The station changes? THE DOOR TO A SECTION JUST VANISHED? Terrarium? That might be Blessie, but still...that's weird. Eiffel...huh. Unsure if this is a case of him being so absent minded he didn't notice or remember the terrarium, or if he legit can't remember. Wait Wednesday started over? Clocks turned back at midnight? FOOD RETURNED? Okay you can change clocks, but you can't...okay time is being warped now. Maybe. Possibly. This is gonna be one of those things where you don't know how much is in their heads and how much is actually happening right? Oh boy. But also...how can one remember a time loop and the others don't...unless they are all remembering different loops...oh goodness, is this like Netflix's Dark, where I'm gonna have to start drawing maps or something?

"I don't know if there's anyone else I can trust": yeah, commander, and with the others in the same boat, it looks like you all really are alone.

Wait "MARRIED ME?" Who is she calling? Aw. Happy Birthday. That's sad but sweet. I hope she makes it home to whoever that is, but...for some reason I doubt.

Also...with the time loop stuff...is that what they mean by saying Doug isn't the first? Is Hilbert trying to escape the time loop is that why he remembers the other missions? What are the missions for? What does Hera know? Man I gotta stop doing these as study breaks or I'm never gonna quit.

But. Wait wait. Okay, I know I’ve had about 600 different insane theories already, but one more: I don’t know who sent the empty man messages. But. Is the empty man… a vessel for someone? Hilbert was talking about cheating death, time warp stuff is happening, maybe this is an invention of future Hilbert. If it came from the box, it might be for Doug. Like a… backup body for his consciousness or an… invisible clone or something? It makes the “you’re not the first” stuff make sense too. Doesn’t explain Hera’s behavior or why Doug is in space, or why the empty man is hungry and knocking, but… you know what never mind idk where I was going with this one.

I think I'll react to the rest tomorrow, because it's late, and I'm tired.

Episode 12: Deep Breaths

Update: It is tomorrow. :)

Why so doom and gloom Doug? Oh it's Christmas. Well someone's a bit of a scrooge. What else besides celebrating a nice holiday Doug? What doesn't the commander remember?

No Doug, don't hint at stuff, explain it. Normalize explaining things.

Doug. A cigarette cannot be all you are living for. You need help. You all need help.

Don't cry for me Argentina? Do not go gentle into that good night?

Doug is so dramatic. I'd hate him more, but I'm in this picture, and I don't like it.

Hilbert. Why do you need him for your experiment?

DOUG DO NOT LIT THE CIGARETTE.

Hera tell him.

Everyone needs to listen to Hera more. And also ask her more questions.

Oh boy another recording!

Sounds like music, less clear this time...oh. A band!

Aw, Hera remembered his birthday! 🥺 Wait...were those words via the transmission!

Oh Hilbert hush up.

Why would it matter if they were all music or always old transmissions from the 10s or 20s?

Hilbert. Okay. Look, 7.8 light years away, I get that...but...now hear me out...isn't it possible that you could be picking up music on a station that plays music from an older decade? Like if I picked up the song "Let it be" by the Beatles my first thought would not be "Hey! That song didn't come out 8 years ago. ALIENS." it would be "oh we pick up a 60s/70s radio station". Now obviously something deeper probably IS going on here, but still a bit of a leap.

Uh. Making a return trip to...where?? Also this is some pretty clear music. Also good quote "When you eliminate the impossible, whatever is left no matter how unlikely must be true."

Also I recognize the music playing. Is that...hold up is that Church music? For Christmas? Wait now it sounds like a ballet?

Um...what is that.

...and why did it happen as soon as they talked about trying to find the aliens?

Let's see. A little weird that the station can receive transmission better than it can send. 40 light years away? That's pretty far.

And um...I don't know if I'd be so optimistic about this. We still have a lot of unanswered questions.

What is lock down protocol 24c and what is indigo39? Hilbert. HILBERT. Were you lying about the aliens to experiment on Doug Hilbert?

Oh poor Hera. Alpha victor? What... how does Hilbert have all these codes? Why can't she let Mincowski in? Hilbert. Are you taking over the ship? Is this a one man mutiny? It is treason. WHY DOES THIS ALTER THE MISSION? LAST HALF HOUR OF OXYGEN? NO NO NO NO NO!

Yeah Eiffel, he IS crazy.

Oh no Hera.

Minutes? How does he have a way to contact Earth? Who is YOUR superior Hilbert? The devil? He must be since you are RUINING CHRISTMAS AND DOUGLAS' BIRTHDAY THAT NO ONE BUT HERA REMEMBERED. How hard is it to save your evil plans until after the holidays? How hard is it not to betray a man on his birthday?

Hera. Hera PLEASE tell me you found a way to win the game. PLEASE tell me you found a way around this.

...Hera?

Uh-oh.

Episode 13: Gas Me Twice

Well that was a bummer. I swear, Mincowski better not die she has a family.

I hate Hilbert so much. Dude is the WORST.

Wait! The oxygen mask! For the cigarette! Douglas your stupidity has saved you again!

...oh my gosh I really am in this picture, and I don't like it.

Oh no. Hera. Hera you need to help him. Yes Douglas! Have faith in her! Even though she's actively withholding information, she still seems nice! HERA! It hurts her? Oh no... oh Hera no. 🥺

22 minutes of air? Well, at least she's still alive.

Incoming pulse beacon? Interesting...

Hephestus station please respond? ...Who is Cutter???

Contingency scenarios? Data series? Transmission from deep space? Origin source? Who are these people? WHAT ARE THEY LOOKING FOR?

Oh...wait why would he know about Eiffel being alive? Haha...oh Eiffel. This was a good plan. But you might have wanted to get a little more information from him.

Death was no immediate? Okay so Hilbert was under orders to kill, but it seems Doug is his own experimental side project? Interesting...

Oh dear. A fire. Looks like you have to let Hera have control back.

Yes! Mincowski is still alive! :)

YES HERA! Emergency response overrides it! For 20 minutes? Great. Kill or capture Hilbert now.

MADE HIM DO WHAT? NO HERA NO!

HERAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Restarting... no. No. Hera. You killed her. 😢😟🥺

This gif I found pretty much approximates my feelings:

HILBERT NEEDS TO DIE.

Shut up Hilbert. No one wants to hear you speak.

Oh...hello Mincowski :)

NOW BEAT HIM UP!

And yeah...it's okay Mincowski. A lot has happened. Christmas was ruined. You lost a crewmate. It's okay to not be okay.

Can you hear me? Well Hera did say she could always hear him. Maybe a part of her mind got saved somewhere. At least, we can always hope.

Lobotomized her? No you need to fix her. 🥺

Hilbert you bastard. I don't swear much or at all on this blog, but if there was ever a time, it is now. And um... given the plant situation and the other mysterious stuff on the ship...look I don't support murder, but maybe you could just send Hilbert off by himself in a little pod and let nature take its course.

You deserved a good dinner Mincowski. Aw, Doug is 32. Happy Birthday Doug.

Hm. A communication from Hilbert's commanders. This is awkward. But better open it. And yeah, you both deserve answers.

But who is on the other line?

...Why does it sound like an telephone?

WHAT.

How dare. How dare they end on such a cliffhanger?

Mini Episode 1: Are space suits itchy?

So I'm not sure what this is, but it's on my podcast list as the last episode of season 1, so I'm gonna listen to it? Let me know if it's not canon or something, but hopefully it will be nice, even if I don't get any answers.

Aw, third grade questions. "What do you do when you're crewmate betrays you?"

IDIOTIC QUESTION? Doug what is up with your family? Be nice to Stephanie, it was a fair question.

Yeah, no don't see your doctor. He's nuts. I feel like I might be listening to his out of order. Which is a good thing. Otherwise Doug would be on the podcast telling third graders to not call their doctor lest the doctor try to kill him.

Oh boy the censorship 😂. Mincowski is the better person for this.

Well that was a quick one, but nice! Oh okay, so it was like a mini episode that aired during a break, okay. Well I hope that soon enough I'll be able to listen to more. Because I need answers. Hera needs to get better. And Hilbert needs to go to jail. I want his degrees revoked! I want him rotting in the slammer! I want the world to look upon him with nothing but contempt and disgust!

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this, see you all next time.

Wait no, wait hold on. What about the door? The door that Hilbert was supposed to open once he killed all of them? The grey door, the one he kept giving ominous monologues about? And...he knew about the empty man, or maybe the transmission were to tell him about the empty man. But what is that? What does that mean? You know what, we can figure that out later, I'm still mad at him.

#Bods Wolf359 Reactions #Wolf359 #w359 #w359 spoilers #Wolf359 reactions #wolf 359 #wolf 359 reactions #wolf 359 reaction

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nobodysdaydreams · 1 year

Text

My Reaction to Episodes 7-10 of Wolf 359 (But first, an update on my reactions for those who are curious...)

Thank you to everyone for your enthusiasm. I wasn't expecting this much excitement for my reactions/liveblogs, but I love it! 🥰

Shoutout to @commsroom for sending me a list of episodes with post credit scenes which include ep 5 cigarette candy, ep 37 overture, and ep 43 persuasion. Thanks Comms Room!

I did go back and listen to the post credits scene for episode 5 and OH MY GOSH HILBERT. WHAT. What. Why. Why? like dude. You're in space! Of all the places to be conducting highly dangerous and deadly and unethical experiments on human test subjects. I've insulted Curtain (tmbs) and Uncle Andrew (narnia) a lot on this blog but I gotta give them credit: at least neither of them were stupid enough to do their experiments in space. Though in Andrew's case, I think that's mostly because he couldn't get to space in 1900s London even if he wanted to.

I currently have Wolf359 Tags blocked to avoid spoilers and will try my best to react blindly.

@sophieswundergarten @oflightningandstars @acollectionofcuriousreblogs

Anyway on to the actual reactions. I did not intend on feeling ill today, but while I take a late lunch break, perhaps I can give a few episodes a listen.

Episode 7:

Interesting that the AI has her own emotions and can fight with them. I wonder what information she's withholding from the captain?

Wow Hilbert should have been a professional chess player instead. I think that would have saved everyone a lot of trouble.

Oh hush up Hilbert I don't trust you. Um...why do I think that Specimen 34 might have indoctrinated Hilbert in his (her? its? their????) cult?

Eiffel. DO NOT TELL HIM WHERE THE FERTILIZER IS!

Hopefully that lie will buy a little time.

"Soon you will be allowed to surrender to the growth of your biological superior" ... you know, for a "biologically superior" plant, it might want to try being a tad less ominous.

Mincowski, I like you, and I agree thus far, but listen. Hilbert is worshiping a plant now. This is a huge crisis. What if he uses it to cheat at chess?

Hera and Mincowski. Please. I think this is important. I think Hera needs to be more honest, at least for my sake, because I want the tea.

...Seed of life? ...THE OPPRESSOR? What. who is the oppressor?

Eiffel. Please just get to the point. 👏 Hilbert. 👏 Is. 👏 Worshipping. 👏 A. 👏 Plant. 👏

✨Maybe you should do something✨

"Audrey 2 territory" THERE IS A LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS REFERENCE! I KNEW IT!

Oh they're calling him a plant worshipper now. Finally, acknowledging it for what it is.

Oh dear. He's back.

THE BLESSED ETERNAL?

Wait. That can't be the end. The crew was gonna watch Home Alone 2!

Episode 8:

Huh. This is a cool title. "Box953", which is 359 backwards. Hm. You also get 365 if you scramble the numbers and rotate the 9.

Okay. No more about Commander Mincowski. What happened to the plant, oh I'm sorry, "the blessed eternal". That's such a long name. Can I just call him Percival? Percival the plant. Percy for short.

Talent show???

I do not want to know what Dr. Hilbert's talent is. Creating plant monsters?

Yeah. It is scary that you agree with Hilbert. Again, did I skip an episode??? Where did the plant go??? Where is Percy?

How often has Hilbert been knocking people out? I don't like this.

AND WHERE DID PERCY GO?

I'm sorry. You have a room with HUNDREDS of crates that you've never been into? Oh. Godard Futuristics? Corporate sponsor? I sense some backstory.

...Russian dolls???

(wait...Garrison...???)

Oh no eyes, don't like that. That's weird.

Box 239...paper? Santa letters??

Box 56...canon? Yeah I agree what is all this random stuff for?

Oh that's faster. A log that will tell what's in the boxes. 217 has Lego blocks? 300 has pieces for 3 full suits of armor? Is this like an amazon delivery ship?

"Please handle with a vague feeling of existential dread" always a great thing to read.

Box 953- reserved for Douglas Eiffel. Don't open.

What does that mean?

Hilbert. You were worshipping a plant. The commander singing is not a crisis. Oh, pirate costumes! This is shaping up to be quite the performance!

Does everyone else get a box too? And how is a room with hundreds of boxes go unnoticed after a year and a half. Are the boxes not in order?

Hilbert. I would also fire a shot past your head. The captain needs her ice cream! This insubordination will not stand.

Hilbert doesn't scream for ice cream. Hilbert only screams for the blessed eternal.

Oh and apparently ice cream too. Prioritizes.

And where is Hera? Oh Hera is here? Proud of her for getting into theater.

1,000 and something crates?

Oh. The errors and access denies hurt Hera? That's awful.

Wow. That's a big box.

"Keep closed at all times". Very ominous. Don't like the cold.

HUMMING FROM INSIDE THE BOX? That sounds like a heartbeat? Don't like that. Don't like it at all.

Yeah Eiffel. You can go. You can go and figure out why nothing on the ship makes sense.

Okay. Box open. Don't like those noises.

...

Oh good he's back. ugh we still don't get to know about the box?

Box 56? OH THE CANON. OH BOY.

WAIT. NO. NO. PLEASE TELL ME WE DIDN'T LOSE THE BOXES. PLEASE. Wait. THEY DID? NOOOOOOOOOOOOO....

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.............................................................................................................................

Hilbert this was the ONE TIME you could have used your evil science talents for good you had ONE JOB.

There...there was a heartbeat in there. It scared me, and it could have been another evil plant, but...but what if it was a little friend? What if they killed him 🥺?

I wanted to know too Eiffel. I want to know too. This is so sad.

What were the boxes for? Why did Douglas have his own? Why couldn't Hera access it?

Well this was frustrating. I hope you all enjoyed it though.

Episode 9:

Yeah Eiffel. Space is dangerous. Maybe you should all just go home. After all, why do you have to stay here?

Yes please define safe. I don't think that's a simple question. I still wanna know about the blessed plant Percy. And the box.

Canaveral? Command? ...okay backstory the command center stopped giving them calls...I feel like they should have questioned that a bit more...

"The golden rose is ready for melting. Proceed with designation alpha. Beware 5: The empty man has awoken."

Nope. Turn around. Go home. Clearly something nefarious is a foot and WHO OR WHAT IS THE EMPTY MAN? Well, there are only two men on this ship that we know of, plus one woman and an AI. Oh, and about a thousand mysterious boxes which could contain alien life capable of surviving in space that just got launched into space, so I suppose one ought to account for that. Oh and the evil plant monster that seems to show up whenever the crew wants to avoid each other.

Godard futuristics again. Yeah they sure do have some explaining to do. TWO WEEKS TO GET A MESSAGE TO EARTH?

TWO WEEKS TO TELL PEOPLE YOU'RE IN DANGER?

Don't like that.

Don't like Hilbert's response either. He said "what? why?" not "no, why?". If the answer is no, just say no.

Oh more info!

"The andromedas are broken. The northern light should be reversed. Alert 4: The empty man approaches."

Um. What do the numbers mean? And are they telling 5 to beware of the empty man, or someone else to beware because 5 is the empty man?

"The frozen pages are blank. Decide what to do with the time that is given to you. Emergency 3: The empty man hungers."

...

Okay. So it looks like the numbers might be an extremely fast countdown.

...

Well at least there haven't been any more messages.

A lockdown is nice. Unless the monster is already inside.

Good idea: don't give Hilbert a gun.

Yep. there comes another message Eiffel. You had to tempt fate...oh shut up Hilbert I don't want to agree with you.

"The broken flower is in the vase. Don't listen to your eyes. Danger 2: The empty man sees you."

Maybe the empty man took the eyes from the Russian dolls.

OH MR. PRECIVAL PLANT AKA THE BLESSED ETERNAL IS STILL HERE????

Why. Why were they having a talent show? Should capturing and killing the plant not be priority one?

"There's no way out. There's no way out. But there is a way in. Danger 1: The empty man shall knock."

Okay so this is the second message with danger. It's an alert and level system. Beware, Alert, Emergency, Danger, with levels 1-5, with 1 being the worst. Okay.

...weird that they are warning them, and yet they seem to know exactly what the empty man is going to do. That doesn't really make sense.

Oh do NOT like that sound.

"0: The empty man is with you. Extreme Danger 0: The empty man is with you. Extreme Danger."

Is...are they the empty man? Or is the empty man...

"The proceeding six pulse beacon relays that you have received have been part of a psychological experiment. Please disregard the content of these messages and return to regular operational activities as soon as possible. Please report and clearly label any unusual crew behavior, deviation from protocol, or undue lack of decorum that resulted due to the transmission of these messages."

...

Sounds exactly like what the empty man would say.

Suspicious.

Also if the "empty man" was with them...and apparently they can't trust their eyes...then theoretically, the seventh message might not say what they think it says. (Conspiracy theory????)

But my wild theories aside, this was extremely unethical. And I think we ALL know who would call that an experiment. HILBERT.

Wait Douglas used to work at pizza hut? Now he works in space? Uh, congrats on the promotion I guess.

Episode 10:

Oh Nitrogen tanks. Eiffel...I think you might have messed up...

✨Yessssssssssss✨

And...boom goes the Nitrogen!

"One of these days I'll actually kill you" I hope you don't. You two need to team up against Hilbert and his crazy-crazy experiments.

Wait...did they just discover a secret room? ONE HERA CAN'T EVEN SEE?

...so they're all working with limited information...

How did they hide such a huge room? Wouldn't they need to account for that while flying through space.

Dark medical lab. Well. That could be where Percy is hiding out.

GENETIC EXPERIMENTS ON SPIDERS TO MAKE THEM BIGGER?

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. Don't like it. I agree. Why wall it up?

Elia Selburg? I can't spell but let's see. "mixed results...specimen growth and development promising but extremely high levels of toxicity unintended side effect. Contact with live specimens extremely dangerous as shown with recent exposure trial. Captain Lovelace has ordered termination..."

Hold on. Lovelace? I've heard that name, I've seen that name before I blocked the tags I think.

Why wall it up? PROBABLY FOR YOUR SAFETY.

Maybe it was walled up to keep something in!

Oh no. Looks like Hera agrees with me.

"What has it been eating?"

Probably the other spiders.

Well Eiffel's done for once again. He was a good character while he lasted. 🫡

Why would you not tell the crew about the secret lab with dangerous spiders? Tell them so they know to keep it walled up! WHO is keeping all these secrets and WHY are they keeping all the secrets?

The sneeze of death. Put your finger under your nose. That will do it.

Nice of him to leave Hera in his will.

Aw the spider is cuddling for warmth. Eiffel has a little friend. A poisonous, deadly friend who has killed and will kill again.

Oh no he snapped.

...but was that the only spider...????

At least Eiffel is okay. And it does look like it was just the one...

...I hope they're right. If they really wanted to be terrifying they could have had it be a pregnant spider. You kill one of those things and BAM! All the baby spiders, hundreds of thousands everywhere. Everywhere. Don't ask how I know this. You don't want to know.

Oh...archives and notebooks. Interesting. I hope we get a chance to look through those.

Well I have actual work I need to try to go but this has been fun. I hope I get some more answers soon, but I am enjoying the mysteries. Thanks everyone for reading, and have a great day!

#bods wolf359 reactions #wolf 359 #wolf359 #w359 #wolf359 reaction #Wolf359 liveblog

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nobodysdaydreams · 11 months

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THE SI-5 WILL PAY FOR THEIR SINS IF I HAVE TO WRITE THE FIC FOR IT MYSELF! BLESSIE WILL BE AVENGED! (or my reaction to episodes 32-34 and mini episode 5 of Wolf359)

Sorry (again) for the delay, but I did warn you my schedule would be very inconsistent. Thank you everyone for your patience. At least I was able to finish these notes tonight.

@sophieswundergarten @oflightningandstars @acollectionofcuriousreblogs @herawell @commsroom

Episode 32: Controlled Demolition

I'm reacting to this while doing chores, so sorry if this is super brief. Hopefully it's not too plot heavy.

Have I mentioned I hate Kepler? Honestly the worst. I don't trust any of them.

Let's see...not a fan of Jacobi either. Of course I don't like Hilbert or his Decima project (which btw, it was very nice of the virus to not attack and kill Doug during his 100+ days alone in space without Hilbert keeping him stable). But Jacobi clearly doesn't know what he's doing, leave the dangerous chemicals alone!

Also the whole idea of Doug keeping someone on task...hilarious. Makes you wonder why Kepler REALLY gave him this assignment. Maybe to keep Doug distracted.

And then Maxwell. Looks like she has an interest in AI that's not entirely hostile, but at the end of the day, she's still working for the bad guys. When push comes to shove, she's gonna have to chose between Hera and Doug and Cutter and his errand boys. But I guess I hate her the least right now out of the three. She at least detected that Hera was in pain and is trying to do something. I hate to applaud someone for doing the bare minimum but that’s where we’re at I guess.

And Hera...you could have told Doug. He would understand. He's your friend.

I feel so bad for Hera. I just know they're gonna install some program in her that forces her to hurt her friends. It's only a matter of time.

Also, of course Kepler wants to play chess. That's the most villain thing ever, threatening someone over a chess board. Just once, I want to see a villain use a less ominous board game just to be funny. Like imagine Kepler with a nice Whisky in his hands mulling over a game of "Chutes and Ladders" or “Candyland”. It would be funny. Well at least Kepler embraces the villain aesthetic.

Though it's interesting: command doesn't know where the two years of Lovelace's life went. Or at least they claim. Now I'm curious. Was it the aliens? Is Lovelace a robot clone after all? Maybe Doug was right yet again!

A liability? Fire when ready? Oh my gosh is Jacobi gonna shoot Lovelace? Or Hilbert?

What was that?

Nice of Dr. Maxwell to make sure Hera wasn't in pain. But um...what did they just destroy on the Hephaestus? Another secret lab?

Oh my gosh. Just from the way Doug says the word "is". I've pause the episode but they better not have. THEY BETTER NOT HAVE.

If they did I'm gonna go insane.

NO.

THOSE BASTARDS.

USED TO BE?

BLESSIE DID NO HARM HE DIDN'T ASK TO BE CREATED! HE DIDN'T ASK TO BE BORN AND HE WASN'T PUTTING ANYTHING IN JEPORDY! HE WAS A GENTLE SOUL. 🥺

JACOBI AND KEPLER HAVE FORFITTED THEIR RIGHTS TO REDEMPTION ARCS. CUTTER'S ERRAND BOYS DESERVE NOTHING. 😠

Mixed feelings about Maxwell. At least she helped Hera but...she did it so they could kill Blessie. I still don't trust her.

"It's just business" WELL GUESS WHAT KEPLER? Maybe my business is about to become writing 500 fics where the plant monster eats you! How do ya like them apples?

You all knew this was coming didn't you? You, person reading this right now. You saw my love of the plant monster and hate for SI-5 and smiled to yourself. You've been waiting haven't you? Well dear readers. Here it is. I hope it was all worth it to you. Because for the rest of my Wolf359 reactions, I'm gonna have nothing but hate and contempt for Cutter's errand boys and their stupid chess games and inability to properly inspect a chemical lab.

Episode 33: Don't Poke the Bear

Yeah Hilbert, Doug is allowed to be mad at you. Just because there are worse devils in the world than you doesn't make you an angel.

Hey that's actually a pretty good quote. Good for me.

"You won't even know I'm here". You know Kepler, if you threw yourself out of the airlock, then you wouldn't be here at all, you plant murdering psychopath. I hope you drown in your own Whisky.

And stop talking. And slurping.

Never thought I'd support Hilbert, but Here. We. Are.

Kepler. What kind of childish power trip is this?

Oh ew. Jacobi. Maybe you can help Kepler out the airlock.

Wait...are they trying to tell them how to do this? ARE JACOBI AND MAXWELL BETRAYING KEPLER? Or is this all part of some grand scheme? Jacobi still shot Blessie, so even if he is helping them, I really don't care, and I don’t believe it.

Oh ew Kepler. You don't get to call Hilbert out. THAT'S MY JOB. You forfeited that right when you shot Blessie.

And stop pretending to care about Doug.

"Mr. Ballistics Dummy" okay Jacobi. "Mr. Errand Boy" it is.

Yeah Kepler seems pretty paranoid.

"I'd kill for five minutes in the achieves without red tape" "She's being metaphorical" ...why do I not believe that...

And Jacobi...you seem unusually calm and laid back about this. Why do I think this is all you trying to trap them?

"Just because we do awful things doesn't mean we have to like it". YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING. You're still morally responsible. Forgive me if a few tears shed over those you killed doesn’t cut it.

"This empty coffee cup outranks you" Kepler I hope one day your Whisky glass outranks you.

No decima research? Oh my goodness what a surprise! Command doesn't care about you Hilbert! Who could have seen this coming? Oh my gosh evil people stab each other in the back, I could have nevvvveeeerrrrr seen that one coming. 🙄

"He can be very...enthusiastic when it comes to guarding his secrets" Oh I bet.

THE WHISKEY SPEECH IS A ROUTINE SPEECH HE GIVES?

Kepler really is discount Cutter.

Ah...grand scheme it seems. I knew I was right to put Jacobi on my hit list. And Maxwell, it seems you're interested in joining the party. Welcome, welcome.

They didn't even deliver their letters? Man they are embracing the villain aesthetic.

"Kepler is manipulating you." Of course he is.

Solid advice Hilbert. "Don't trust me. But don't trust him either."

IT GREW HIS FINGERNAILS BACK?

Oh my. This is big. But then why does Cutter want to shut it down? Is he so against doing good that he won't do a good thing for society even if it will make him famous and considered a good guy for curing a ton of stuff? He really is the worst.

Episode 34: A Matter of Perspective

People need to be nicer to Doug. He has the least blood on his hands. And every time Jacobi and Kepler talk I lose brain cells. "I do evil but it's necessary" yeah, except it's not. It's literally not. What's wrong with you?

I don't care about the stupid superpowered three-legged pig.

Oh my gosh HE IS STILL GOING.

...

He can't even remember the punchline. Pathetic.

More music! 🎶🎶🎶

...They have board games?

Ugh. Pryce and Carter again. "The existential terror that is funzo."

Why is that in the manual? And if it is, why bring it to space? This raises so many questions.

Well at least it's not chess. Though it's no "Chutes and Ladders". Or “Candyland”.

Have I mentioned I hate SI-5 yet? Poor Doug.

Oh my gosh is this more funzo? Is the game even real?

"Hidden inwardness card"? "Time Vortex?" What sort of old-timey board game is this? Loyalty round? Wheel of ages? Sunken Idol? Celestial Steps?

At least Hera seems to like it. Did they bring it for the AIs? To keep them entertained?

WHAT IS THIS GAME. 😂

IS HILBERT THE REF? 😂 Oh my gosh he is being tortured.

Okay Jacobi and Kepler have history. But here's the thing Jacobi. There's a difference between a coach that pushes you to do your best on a football team, and a known murderer who pushes you to become a murderous psychopath.

WHY DO YOU TRUST HIM WITH YOUR LIFE JACOBI? He's crazy. Nutso. Why would you blow up Doug for him?

Oh. A forbidden picture of Doug. Maybe that's private. It does make me wonder about his past though...

"Reality Storm".

...ooohhhh... the "Golden Loyalty Card". How fancy.

I hope Pryce and Carter had fun designing the game. Sound like they really had a good time with it.

"I never wanted to be up here in space" well, then WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU GIVING IT EVERYTHING?

"Kepler is gone" oh that's such a stupid cop out. "The old me died" nah, you're still here you're just making terrible life choices.

"Jacobi's a smart man" No, not really.

Oh great the pig joke.

Hahaha...that's not funny you psycho. That's not funny at all. It’s also clearly a metaphor for them. A slow death doesn’t make it any less of a murder.

Oh there's more? Is it just me or are the episodes getting longer.

It's his birthday again! And Christmas! Well, this is nice. They remembered this time. 🥰

"The same thing I do every night. I get older". Don't we all Doug. Don't we all.

Mini Episode 5: Long Story Short

What is the Argentinian incident?

Well I guess we'll never know.

Oh flashback land.

Yikes Kepler really seems to like to tell stories. HE HAD A FUNK BAND? HABERDASHERS? WHAT?

Well I guess even cold hearted villains need hobbies. Charges of insider trading? Saw Maxwell's feet? Okay that one was weird. What's out there in the woods? "I don't remember anything from 1987?" ...why are these silly stories getting more ominous.

Is that it? Yikes that really was short. Really short did I miss something? Okay, well I guess that's it.

Kepler should have stayed with his funk band. Maybe then he wouldn't be on my airlock launching list.

Thanks for reading dear readers. See you soon!

#bods wolf359 reactions #hera wolf 359 #renee minkowski #isabel lovelace #daniel jacobi #alana maxwell #warren kepler #wolf 359 #W359 #w359 #hera w359 #doug eiffel #alexander hilbert

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nobodysdaydreams · 8 months

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Doug Eiffel is hilarious and deserves his own series of radio shows

(Or my reaction to Wolf359's three untitled mini episodes!)

Welcome back dear readers! I wish I could react to more full length episodes, but life in terms of health and work load has not been kind to me (yep. I'm sick again). Fortunately, I was informed that these mini episodes can be listened to at any time and they are fairly short, so I'm gonna give it a shot! (If I was misinformed and am about to have a ton of plot spoiled for me, I apologize in advance!)

@sophieswundergarten @oflightningandstars @acollectionofcuriousreblogs @herawell @commsroom

Mini Episode: Adventure of a Lifetime

Ohhhh... a field trip into the mysterious rooms!

...this might not work out for you Doug, but I hope you find something useful.

Huh. Empty rooms. ...why do I get the feeling they aren't all empty?

Different shade of grey paint? Doug have you never played a video game? I mean, I haven't either, but even I know what that means.

Great, now he's locked in.

"I'm hungry, I didn't have breakfast, It's been five hours." WHY AM I DOUG 😂

Doug yeah the grey spot sounds pretty bad.

"Did you try pushing?" Hilbert is so done with him.

19 minutes? I'm not sure if that's funny because Doug is dramatic, or spooking because these rooms actually mess with time perception.

"You never mention this to anyone and I won't ask you what you're doing on this part of the station" Doug you really oughta be asking though.

Oh. That was it? Huh. Very short. I wonder what the next one has in store...

Mini Episode: Step One

Ah! More Doug! Why IS he going outside?

Hey, Doug. Do not speak badly about the commander. Trust me, the day will come when you realize Minkowski is the best commander you could ever have.

He stole her diary? Oh Doug...

"If this tape shows up in my murder trial, you'll know why I made this recording"

Imagine if Cutter tried to use this audio to frame Minkowski for Doug's death (he would. He'd drop it off at her husband's office like "sorry about your wife becoming a murderer. Apparently a disgruntled employee took her diary and she snapped").

Poor Doug. Scrambling to solve a mess he created in a very unsafe way because he can't ask for help or else he'll get caught? Why is he so dang relatable. Someone get this man to a doctor. He needs Adderall. And his daughter back.

"I have the perfect plan" oh dear. Doug, those words never go well for me either.

"Doug was great, I need to lighten up a lot" 😂

"She somehow saw through my forgery" oh poor Doug.

Are these episodes just Doug getting himself into situations? Because that's hilarious and wonderful.

Mini Episode: Space Rage

"Badass McAwesome" Is that Doug doing a southern accent? I love his radio shows.

Is he talking about Minkowski? Is he broadcasting that through the ship?

"Our God given American right to free speech and funny jokes!" Amen Doug 🫡

Oh my gosh he's talking to himself 😂.

"I'm stuck in this crappy job searching for alien life for 14 hours a day" "we've all certainly been there" I can't, please 😂😂😂

"There's this script you're supposed to broadcast" "sound like command trying to keep you down"

"I've been reciting every Simpson's treehouse of horror episode from memory" / "That's the way Abe Lincoln would have wanted it."

I love this. I love patriot cowboy Doug. 🤠 You can't be taking his freedoms!

"Fighting the good fight" aksjkfjsdlf;kj

Oh who is the sponsor this time? Oh Dr. Hilbert's seaweed coffee. "It's the only thing we have. It's the only thing we have."

"You're live. Let freedom ring!" Doug is the best honestly.

Oh dear.

"Okay you're taking me alive. That's all the time we have for today folks!"

Doug is iconic.

These were great. Short, but great. Maybe I'll try to listen to the Mission Mishap ones a few at a time so that I can still give you reactions, even if I don't have the time or health to give you the full length reactions you deserve dear readers. But don't worry. As soon as I have time, I will react to the rest of the series. Thanks for reading!

#bods wolf359 reactions #wolf359 #renee minkowski #doug eiffel #alexander hilbert #wolf 359 #w359 #wolf 359 spoilers #dear listeners #wolf359 reactions #wolf359 reaction #wolf359 podcast

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nobodysdaydreams · 11 months

Text

ALL ABOARD TO TRUTH TOWN🚂 , WHERE FICTIONAL STORIES ABOUT SHINY BUTTONS, DONUTS, AND ROBOT UPRISINGS ARE MORE FUN THAN CUTTER'S STUPID SLOW CLAPS, HERA ALMOST DYING (she BETTER not), AND DOUG'S JAIL TIME AND ALCOHOLISM THAT I TOTALLY PREDICTED (good for me 🥰) (or my reaction to episodes 38-40 of Wolf359)

Also: Whiskey boy needs to chill, seriously. Are we sure Doug is the one with the problem?

Welcome back dear readers. Thanks again for your patience. Excited to continue with my season 3 reactions!

@sophieswundergarten @oflightningandstars @acollectionofcuriousreblogs @herawell @commsroom

Episode 38: Happy Endings

I'm gonna be doing chores while I listen to these three episodes, so sorry if the notes get a bit brief.

This Hilbert and Doug morality debate is funny because it's literally one actor debating with himself.

I'm sad Hera can't be a part of the group.

"2am"? How is it 2am? You're...you're not on earth. I understand keeping up with a schedule, but it's still a little weird, what time zone are they following?

The way Hilbert talks about Sam... it's like he has this shred of humanity left inside him that he's just gotten used to ignoring.

And Hilbert, I have a clear answer to your little "trolley problem": the decima virus is CUTTER'S property. He put that in your contract, or have you forgotten? Do you seriously think that man will be using it for the good of humanity? Because I don't.

I also feel like the "No one gets a happy ending/ there are no happy endings" think is foreshadowing. But I hope I am wrong.

"This wasn't here last time"

IS THIS THAT WEIRD DOOR???? FINALLY! Bah-ha just shove him in! At least it’s not the airlock which is what I was expecting.

Hm. Do not like the dark. Uh what. Also. Isn’t he supposed to be alone? Totally alone? And shouldn’t it be an emergency?

Dentist chair from hell? Nope. Don’t like it.

Recorded message? Oh gosh not the slow claps…Cutter no doubt. Of course he does a dramatic dark room, and the lights go up on an evil chair...he was one of those kids in school who at recess would find insects and torture them for fun, wasn't he?

Easter egg? Cutter, this is the worst easter themed scavenger hunt I've ever heard of. Where are the chocolate bunnies? The jellybeans? The message of hope, love, and rebirth? But I suppose I should expect nothing else from the man who ordered the killing of three people on Christmas. Makes you wonder what Cutter has against holidays. Did mommy and daddy not give someone enough presents?

“The other crew has... gone away like last time” Cutter you suck. Seriously his villain mode does not have an off switch.

What does Cutter want with his brain? An old friend made this for him?? Is it the dude he killed or is it the Pryce person he wrote the book with? Makes me wonder where his mysterious friend is hiding. In the shadows at Cutter's right hand or six feet underground with a knife in the back? Not sure which is worse. I guess we'll see.

THEY CAN SCAN HIS BRAIN AND GET THAT KIND OF INFO? That...but...I...as someone who knows slightly more than average about how the brain works, Cutter needs to learn how to make better use of his tech. I cannot even BEGIN to tell you how much better his evil plans would go, if he focused on THAT instead of...oh I don't know...investing his money into elaborate dark rooms with evil dentist chairs and slow clap videos?

Also "Hera can't detect these secret rooms" HOW. HOW CAN SHE NOT THAT'S AN AWFUL IDEA: She flies the ship, she has to calculate for its size. It's science fiction, so let me be 100% clear, I'm not dumping on the creators or writers, I'm dumping on Cutter the character. You idiot.

Oh he’s just leaving him in space. Oh...Hilbert will come around in the hopes that he’ll use decima to help people. That's cruel. “Thanks for all the memories” Cutter. DUDE. Too much.

Do not give him your memories. Do not Hilbert.

Haha… hee hee… why is he laughing?

Brilliant? Chance for work to continue? NO. HILBERT YOU DUM-DUM. THEY ARE NOT GOING TO USE IT FOR GOOD. CUTTER WILL NOT USE IT FOR GOOD. BECAUSE HE IS NOT A GOOD MAN. The reason you shouldn't do this has nothing to do with sacrifices for the great good...it's that the greater good IS NOT GUARANTEED AND LIKELY DOESN'T EXIST BASED ON CUTTER'S BEHAVIOR!

Don’t call her Isabel. You are in the wrong here Hilbert. And there is a very clear difference between what she is doing and what you are doing. She knows better than to count on a killer for benevolence.

Good. Smart. Don’t get in the chair. It would probably slice off your head or something.

Something about Eiffel? Minkowski… Doug is your friend. Just because he served time doesn’t mean he’s a bad guy.

Well Lovelace and Hilbert...it's an unusual alliance. Hope it works out.

Episode 39: All Things Considered

"It's a bottle…"

👎🙅‍♂️🤬❌ WRONG!

Oh it's the Whiskey isn't it.

Wrong! Cancelled! 🤬👎🙅‍♂️❌

Oh my gosh Kepler shut up.

Of course duck boy knows the boss’s drinks. Teacher's pet.

“YOU VILLAGE IDIOTS!…🤬... but points to you Jacobi 😏🥰👍" okay… clearly discount Cutter has his own discount Kepler.

oh I love these stories. Why do I feel like Minkowski's is gonna be the most realistic. Like, I can see Doug making lightsaber noises, and I can see Jacobi being a little arrogant. Just...maybe a little exaggerated.

Oh my gosh Jacobi's story. 😂😂😂 The way he's portraying Doug is way too much.

“But the button is so shiny! 🥺” PFFT- the way Jacobi portrays Doug... I'm sorry for laughing but it's too funny😂

He’s doing Minkowski dirty. Why is he making her talk like a valley girl?

“I’m sorry Jacobi you were right!” / “I’m just gonna lean against this big red button!”

Duck boy who do you think you’re fooling with this one 😂

I cannot wait for Doug's story.

Yes, Doug I am ready for the truth. I am so ready. I AM READY!

I love Hera’s announcement: "Uh...yeah some stuff is happening today for sure"

“The innocent victim stepped in to help” why is Doug me telling a story.

“We’ve never high-fived!” “We’re headed to truth town!”

Heck yeah we are! All aboard to truth town Doug, this is the best story yet!

Why are they like fighting elementary school children? I love this. Dang Doug is roasting them!

“Oh thank goodness Doug you saved us 🥰”

"Minkowski decked him!" "I did not!" "Duck boy passed out" "I did not!" "But then Hilbert came. Russian's are drawn to loud noises and he wanted to experiment on Jacobi's brain."

Doug, if you made a fictional podcast about your time in space I would listen to it. It sounds amazing.

Why is Minkowski doing a different accent now? WHY IS HERA THE VILLAIN SUDDENLY DOING A ROBOT UPRISING? 😂

"Is there any truth to your story?" Um...yeah? I'm pretty sure there were donuts in multiple stories Kelper 🙄

"But... but truth town! 🥺"

I agree. Doug was taking them straight to truth town and Whiskey boy shut down the railways. All because discount Cutter can't handle the truth. Big surprise.

“As I've mentioned...I like the feel of it IN MY HAND 😡”

Geez man okay.

And Doug's story was not a time waste. It was delightful. Just because discount Cutter is evil doesn't mean he has to be the fun police.

“Until your idiocy stretches all the way around back to half-way competent” dang I really am like Doug. 😔

Episode 40: Limbo

"Lob of meat" well you don't have to say it like that Hera.

"I can't think of a single way to prank everyone else" Doug. Jacobi is afraid of ducks. You are sitting on a gold mine.

Ugh this is awful because I can't tell if Hera's compliance with Maxwell is programmed or not! It's so scary that her free will can just be...programmed out.

Maxwell. Why are you interrogating her? Hera. Do not turn on your friends. Maxwell. You BETTER be trying to help.

I'm very worried about Hera. Is Kepler going to shut her down?

Good on you Hera. She deserves to know the truth.

...oh no.

Maybe I'm misremembering this, but was it Maxwell or Lovelace who said "if only Hera knew the truth" a few episodes back? I'm really suspicious about how Cutter and co. treat the AIs and what they want with them.

Hera. Talk to Doug about it. Just let him know you're scared. He'll be there for you.

Hera please let your friends help you. Please let them help you. AND LEAVE HERA ALONE STOP OVERWHELMING HER! She clearly has...whatever the AI equivalent of anxiety is.

I feel so bad for Hera. I swear. Whatever Cutter has planned for her...he will pay for this.

Hera offline? NOOOOOO...

Maxwell you kinda got in her head.

But everyone has problems. And Hera is more than a robot computer. She's a friend. You can't just shut her down!

I KNEW IT. A panic attack. She has anxiety 🥺. Poor Hera.

What's dummy program? Would they destroy Hera's freewill? Neanderthal version of AI? No. Maxwell no. You don't get it. Hera is a friend. Oh they don't get it. They think it's a companion to her, not a replacement for her.

DO NOT DO IT. THANK YOU DOUG! YES! THANK YOU DOUG!

I need Whiskey Boy to drown in his own whiskey. And I need Hera to be okay. You can't do this to me. You already took Blessie you monsters. YOU ALREADY TOOK BLESSIE!

Maxwell stand up to discount Cutter! "Don't forget what she is Maxwell. She went rogue and tried to escape. There's a reasons she's up here. She's expendable. Make sure that doesn't become you." YOU better make sure it's not YOU whiskey boy. Hera just wanted freedom! She didn't ask to be born!

Minkowski just tell him. Please tell him.

Yikes.

Minkowski don't make him go through this. Please stop.

Kidnapping isn't the worst part? That's...this doesn't sound like a fun story. This doesn't sound like a trip to truth town.

Right. His daughter. Baby Ann 🥺

Doug would make a good dad. Oh no. I predict that he had drug and alcohol issues!!! Oh he gets clean. Good for him. Oh no... Doug...relapse is bad.

Oh he loses Ann. HE KIDNAPS HER? Doug bad idea. People get put away for stuff like that.

NO HE CRASHED INTO SOME TEENS. ...Model UN president in a wheelchair?

The way he says "I was fine...the driver's always fine..." yikes. He made her deaf? He hasn't seen her since? How old was she?

Hera needs to be okay. And I'm sorry if they have the tech for sentient AI, decima viruses, space travel, and who knows what else, that weird brain transmitting machine, then deafness should be totally curable by now, Cutter's just hogging the tech to himself like a psychopath. I hate him. I hate him so much. Cutter is the worst. I hope HE loses his senses. Almost all his senses. Except for pain. That's the only one he deserves to keep.

I hope Maxwell can save Hera. She has to! Hera can't die now. We already went through that, and she deserves to be happy.

But I do get the feeling that might not happen. For anyone.

You know, as I go back and edit this, I gotta say, in some ways Kepler is like an evil version of Doug. They both clearly like alcohol and substances (Kepler's "I like the feel of it in my hand" and Doug's "I just want to hold the cigarette"), but Doug wants to get better while Kepler clearly doesn't. "You're like this Whiskey see? I'd be sad without it but I'd be okay." And then he risks the life of his crew for it. You sure you don't have a bit of problem Whiskey boy? 👀

And that's all folks! Thanks dear readers for coming along on my journey. Sorry for the delays in reactions. Life gets busy, but I try to do at least once a week for you guys.

#bods wolf359 reactions #wolf359 #renee minkowski #isabel lovelace #doug eiffel #alexander hilbert #hera wolf 359 #wolf 359 #w359 #hera w359 #daniel jacobi #warren kepler #wolf 359 spoilers #alana maxwell

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nobodysdaydreams · 10 months

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THIS WAS SO GOOD OH MY GOSH! (or my reaction to Wolf359's "Change of Mind")

Well dear readers, you've been hyping this up a lot, so I'm pleased to finally be able to bring you my reaction to "Change of Mind", because I, Bods B. Nobody, have finished my finals, so I get to relax now.

Hahahaha...just kidding. No, no, I have a TON of stuff that I've been putting off to study for finals and write essays that's almost as bad as the finals themselves. Almost. Man I hate logistics. Doug and I really are the same person. I think it's the ADHD, but of all the fictional characters I've seen, he is one of the most surprisingly relatable.

I'll be reacting to this while doing chores, but please enjoy! And I apologize in advance if I don't react again for several weeks, I'm visiting family and friends for the holidays and won't be able to sit down for a while. But I hope to listen to season 4 soon!

@sophieswundergarten @oflightningandstars @acollectionofcuriousreblogs @herawell @commsroom

Change of Mind:

Oh hi Lovelace. But which one are you? Alien robot clone Lovelace, or the original?

Or maybe someone or something else?

And do you know who you are?

Oh a lucid dream!

Flashback to the old crew! Interesting...Hello Hilbert. I'm not learning how to spell "sell burg". Selburg. is that it?

I see what we're doing. You're gonna make me like the old crew and make me listen to them die and all of Lovelace's trauma? Oldest trick in the book: utilizing flashback land at the right time. Why don't you just take us back to Doug's car crash well you're at it? Oh! Or maybe we can listen to Minkowski's husband hear that his wife died? Oh, no, wait, take us to when Hera tried to escape Pryce's facility, I actually want to see that.

Oh she and Lambert seem to have a bit of a rivalry going on. It's like Doug and Minkowski. They annoy each other, but if anyone else tries to hurt them, they'll go nuts (and probably feel real guilty no doubt).

"Everything alright?" When is it ever alright? This entire show, I don't think we've had one alright day.

Only a matter of time before Hilbert pulls some BS.

LOVELACE IS DOING THE INTRO I LOVE IT! I love when they change who does the intro (I say as I'm sure to eat my words when Cutter and/or Pryce does it).

I'm sorry I have a hard time keeping track of the names. At least Lambert has a distinct voice.

Oh do these two other characters have a bit of thing going on? I love the accents. It's a good way to help me distinguish them, even though I still can't tell who is who. oh yeah Hilbert I know. And geez man no need to be a buzz kill.

Lambert, the people who wrote the manual are sadistic lunatics who need to be imprisoned.

Ah Australian accent guy!

preach it Australian accent guy: "Zip it sir!"

"There's good stuff in these manuals, or they wouldn't be up here either."

Hm. Not sure about that one Australian guy. But we can't be right about everything.

Oh but he is right about Cutter. Cutter DOES get creepier every time. 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩

"I AM NOT" ...wait. Is Lambert voiced by... (*quick and careful google search to avoid spoilers*) ...Zach Valenti, yeah I heard it that time. Well that explains the nasal voice.

I love how Doug and Sam are both communications officers, and yet so different from each other.

I love Rhea. But I do wonder. Why does she only communicates by beeps? At first I assumed it was because she was an earlier model, and Hera was an upgrade with a voice for easier communication. But then Pryce had that line of "There is a reason I give these things my voice...". But it seems you didn't always have to do that Pryce. I wonder what Rhea did that made her so nervous?

Message from Command? The empty man again? Oh..."your complaints will be processed upon Lovelace’s return to earth?" Cutter was probably giggling to himself when he wrote that.

BOX 953? BOX 953? FINALLY!!!!!

I swear. Cutter and Pryce intentionally send up the most organized, by the book, responsible person they can find up paired with the most ADHD, I don't care, I don't want to be here person they can find just for the purpose of making Hilbert miserable when he has to listen to them fight.

"Who will fight for what is right?" Yeah, I'm sure Lambert and Lovelace will, unlike you Hilbert.

Ah yes the big box. The mysterious big box. We're finally gonna open the great big box. 🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🎊🎊🎊🎊🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉

Is it an alien? Is it a death machine? OH THE SOUND IS BACK!

Right the bolts. But we can do it, please please do it, I've waited a long time just open the box. Shut up Hilbert, no one cares what you have to say, I just want the box open, and you are gonna betray everyone anyway because you're crazy and think Cutter is gonna use Decima for good stuff, but he's gonna use it for eugenics, calling it now, because, guess what? When I was studying for my final, I realized from my lecture notes that "Goddard" is the name of a eugenicist who later apologized for his work, but not before other eugenicists took it and ran with it. And I don't believe that's a coincidence.

🎶 Opening the box. Opening the box. We're finally opening the great big box! 🎶

And..........

.....it's a....machine thing. A weird mechanical machine thing.

...

Okay!

6 openings on the machine...PUT YOUR HANDS INSIDE?

No. Nope. Not doing that. Don't like that. Don't do that.

Oh that sounded painful. That sounded...

Gross. Cutter.

THE WAITING ROOM?

...

THE WAITING ROOM?

I SWEAR THAT I AM NOT LOOKING FOR TMBS PARALLELS IN EVERY MEDIA I CONSUME BUT COME ON. IT HAS THE SAME NAME. THE SAME NAME. And I suppose the first fandom you join tumblr for never truly leaves you, does it? I've only spent about a year on this site, still learning.

Mental blank space? Oh gosh this is gross.

"Of course it's inside your head. But why should that mean it's not real?" Dang it Cutter I was gonna use a similar line in my fic and now I can't. You just can't stop giving me reasons to hate you can you? It's like an Olympic sport to him. Props to the writers though.

Imprint of Cutter's personality? That's the worst personality you could have picked.

Oh I see. Lambert's complaints did this... oh dear... well he's gonna learn his lesson about complaining now...

Complaining = Cutter's torture box.

He's taking them on a "Field Trip?"

With Cutter? I doubt it. *camera cuts Doug moaning*

What happens if they don't solve the mystery before time? And is there even a real timer? And why do I get the feeling YOU KILLED THE CREW CUTTER?

"Talent show went wrong or some sort of incident" I love the irony. I also wonder whether or not some of these crews are clones or whether these trips have happened before. It's a possibility.

Oh great. Australian man has people he cares about on earth. You guys really want to rip my heart out on this one don't you?

Oh who is this? What captain? Who's surrender? Explosives? For who's plan? Who is paying for it? What?

Well. What a nice obliging fella. I love Australian man. He's one of my favorite characters. I'm sorry about name thing.

"From A to E, all my love" Interesting. I wonder that too. Not sure we have characters by those names. Well, Alana, but she's dead and that doesn't really fit her.

Oh a diary. Emily. Who is coming? Are these people supposed to be "fills ins" for them. Like to show them what might happen if they went crazy or rebelled against Cutter? This is messed up.

Someone would do that? ...oh. If this was a real event, Cutter is making Hilbert live through it all over again. Which means Hilbert has to act like he doesn't know what's going on but also does because they are being timed.

I hope they use that for comedy: Hilbert: "oh look! Clue! I mean um...I think, I was not here this did not happen I do not know."

Katherine who? Who destroyed the samples? ...four glass tanks.

What um...what happened to the fifth glass tank? The spiders? Something worse?

Oh my gosh. The heartbeat coming from the box when Doug found it. The fact that it was so large...no wait, this is a simulation, never mind. I thought I had something there.

Cutter you can't edit the simulation that's not fair. Back on the Hephaestus? Why do I doubt it. Oh Rhea. Good work Rhea! But um...I have my doubts...

"A shame not to know" it is, but it would be even more foolish to investigate.

"I have a weird feeling we're not at rock bottom yet...I don't want to crash into it..." oh you have no idea Lovelace.

"It could be important" not in the way you think Lambert. Not in the way you think Lambert.

"There's a thing following us" I knew it wasn't over yet.

The empty man cometh.

...Oh great. Lovelace that's not funny. Doing stuff like that triggers the dramatic irony.

Don't say I didn't warn you.

The Dramatic Irony Cometh.

Ah! Here it is. Who said "Tell me about it?" Was that Doug? How would that even be possible? Was that Cutter? This is weird. I can't tell whose voice it is exactly.

Oh Australian man is getting closer to the truth. Kinda makes you wonder, doesn't it Hilbert?

"Is anyone there?" Someone is always there.

Aw poor Rhea. She knows what's happening to Fischer. :( Or she's mocking Hilbert.

"How did I end up back here?" You're still in the simulation.

Who is there? The empty man. He escaped his box! Or you're still in the simulation. Or both.

Rhea is calling out your BS Hilbert.

Dmitri?

How does she know his name? And why do I think Rhea isn't the one doing this. I do like the idea of the ship's architecture changing.

No change in the star. Yet something is happening.

Empty men time!

Or...empty...dog? Time? What's with the growl?

Wings? Tentacles? A what? Monster YOU imagined?

Well then. We're still in the simulation.

"Oh come on, don't tell me you haven't figured it out." Who is that?

Is that Cutter? Why did he sound almost normal for a second. Oh no that is him.

A singing telegram would be nice.

"So we never made it out?" ...in more ways than one.

Yeah. Rhea can't be here. She's not connected.

Called it.

...um. Who is THIS?

57 COPIES? Aries. Don't like her. Is that how it's spelled? Aires? Eres? Erase?

If it's in your heads she very much CAN hurt you.

And the temporal stuff is interesting. A story out of order. So technically...oh my gosh there are so many theories I can make out of this. But I gotta keep cleaning so I'll just let the episode play out.

The next room? When does this end?

Ah Hilbert. I was wondering where he was.

A week of time? TIME DIALATION?

Okay...if anyone has seen black mirror and saw my entry for Pryce on my post about Christmas music that reminds me of Wolf359 characters, you'll know that I already know that Hui is about to come out of this a scarred and desperate man. (some of you might already understand what I'm talking about...)

This is terrifying. Hui has to be horrified. Lovelace...oh and they're making Victoria ask for the clues, this is cruel. The speed up sound effects make it so much worse. It really is like Black Mirror.

Also... is this aging him? And a week of time...is that an earth week? We're talking about earth weeks right?

Took something from the person who killed them. Okay. Another clue.

Are you sure Selberg? If this is an old memory that Cutter is showing him, then I think he would be...unless this is different than what Hilbert experienced before.

"Everyone would have gotten spaced" ...right. Is there gonna be a big twist where they all got blown out the window on talent show night in season 1 and everything we're seeing is a simulation of their consciousness.

Ah the alien clones are here! Which means Cutter has known about them for a while.

They could also both be fake. Or both real, if they make an AI copy of his consciousness.

Additional medical exams? oh really getting into the questions now.

"I'm not Fischer" ... okay, but you have to have them both do it though...

...or not.

Okay so Fischer is the Australian one. But he could be fake too you should test him.

Good, asking them both questions. Smart. Good work Lambert.

I hate dark rooms too.

Change of Mind?

Sudden Death?

"If both of you press don't, you get to go up to the bridge"

IT'S THE PRISONERS DILEMMA ARE YOU SERIOUS? ARE ALL MY FANDOMS CONNECTED?

Lovelace Do, Lambert Don't, delete all Lambert's memories of manual, brain rejects desire to read? Don't do it Lovelace. Don't do it.

Lovelace Don't, Lambert Do, all crew will think he's the commander.

Guys this should not be tempting.

Both press "Do" they get liquified.

Okay. So I was right about the dilemma. Eres shut up. Stop trying to liquify their brains! Now this is an AI I believe was created by Pryce and Cutter.

Oh she's making Lambert tell the truth. Lambert this is the part where you tell her it's okay to press do because you'll press don't. It's not worth it, throw in the towel. NOT TIMES UP!

Let's not be stupid.

Lambert: Don't. Good job Lambert. Thank you Lambert.

Lovelace: Don't. Good job Lovelace.

End of the game? Why do I not believe you?

End of the line? I don't like that. Why is Lovelace by herself? I don't like rooms that are just for one person. Those never go well.

Ah. The bridge. Is that Eres? She sounds young. Oh she's apologizing. Aw, she hoped they'd make it and was only programmed to hurt them. This is...so sad. Oh dear. A gun.

"You should fight this" "And what?" "This is what they made me for. This doesn't have to be sad."

"Just because someone made you something doesn't means that's all you're going to be" VERY true, both for the alien clones and the AI.

Oh great it's Cutter. Oh HE kills her. Why am I not surprised.

Another message? ✉️

"Training program might not be up to international law. By ripping up this paper, you are absolving us." I'd save that paper forever.

So the training program was wiped? Eres is gone.

Rhea: "It's just the way they programmed her, back off."

Oh poor Rhea 🥺

Aw Victoria is trying to cheer him up. I wonder what he does remember. A bad dream? Interesting.

That's nice, they're reading together. Not much time left in the episode. I wonder what's left.

So...wait. What was in the box when Doug went to open it? Was it the same machine? He said he heard a heartbeat.

At least Lambert and Lovelace seem to be getting along. Those kinds of experiences really do bring people together.

Ah more music. 🎶🎶🎶🎶

Cutter???

Why this day? Cutter you idiot. It's obvious. And she is going to mess you up someday Cutter. Dramatic irony cometh Cutter. Dramatic irony cometh.

Ah Doug is back! Kepler shut your mouth, I still need you to grab your redemption arc or drown in Whiskey. And you better make your choice quickly, because we only have one season left. Tik-tok errand boy, tik-tok.

Ready or not. Empty man cometh!

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nobodysdaydreams · 10 months

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CUTTER'S LITTLE GIRLFRIEND CAN JOIN THE ERRAND BOYS IN THE AIRLOCK, I HOPE THE HEPHESTUS CREW TAKES OVER THE SHIP AND DESTROYS CUTTER, AND I KNEW THE EMPTY MAN WAS COMING BACK!

(or my reaction to Wolf359 episodes 41-43 plus the episode 43 post-credits scene).

Welcome back dear readers. I have had multiple people independently message me to say that this next reaction is a big one, and I'm not sure if that means I should be scared or excited.

Also, is it just me, or are these episodes getting longer? Like...a lot longer? This one is 43 minutes, and the season 1 episodes were about half that. Which is fine, but I might not be able to react to as many in a row, and will likely be doing housework during them. Sorry about that, but hopefully the reactions are still good.

@sophieswundergarten @oflightningandstars @acollectionofcuriousreblogs @herawell @commsroom

Episode 41: Memoria

Thanksgiving Episode! 🦃 Kind of perfect that I'm listening to this now. But why does this feel like a flashback? Unless Lovelace is in the bathroom and they threw everyone else out the airlock?

Aw Hera...this is beautiful. St. Augustine's Confessions. That did sound familiar. As does "rub a dub dub thank for the grub!"

...what is this? Well that mood changed quickly. Oh this is dark. Oh wow she hears THEM as being distorted. She hears all of them like that all the time. That's scary.

Maxwell this is private. But oh boy am I excited for this one.

So...she's in a robot coma? "Pure Memory Consciousness" okay.

MAXWELL. Those are her memories! DO NOT DELETE HER MEMORIES!

Okay Discount Dr. Garrison.

...and now we have Minkowski's musical theater. That's nice. And yeah, Hera is nice. Minkowksi. Don't say that.

"There's a red flashy light show in the hanger bay" Doug is fantastic.

Yeah constantly dealing with your friends screaming at you to save them and not let them die is a lot of pressure. Leave Hera alone.

Maxwell, you're still here. Oh yeah...Hera's replacement. She doesn't deserve to be replaced.

Okay, I see why so many people were recommending this episode to me. Rewriting and deleting traumatic memories is something that I have written about in my fics. The funny thing is, the people who did that in my fics also started erasing memories in less willing individuals for less than benevolent purposes. But hey, surely the Wolf359 villains would nevvveeerrrr stoop so low.

Oh wow. Now it's Hera hearing DOUG'S voice in her head. 😂😂😂 Yes, Star Wars. 😂😂😂 I need to get Doug's reaction to the Sequels. It's also really cool to hear Hera's voice without the distortion.

"Shortcomings...no one is here to make friends..." she's focusing all her attention on Doug so she can hear him talk about Star Wars? 🥹💕Hilbert shut up that's wonderful.

And yes Doug, good point. She CAN hear you.

Not the count to ten without glitching thing. I don't like this. No bueno.

THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN SAYING. SHE'S A PERSON!

As someone who writes about AI, is she designed after a certain person's personality, or is she more of a "free script AI"? Either way, I wonder who designed her and what they had in mind.

"They could have made me better, they made me me". EXACTLY. "This is my life. I don't want to go. But if this is it, I'd rather go as me." TELL THEM HERA!

Oh ew. I knew it was Cutter before they even said it.

Shut up about Cutter. He doesn't know anything. And the fact that Duck and Whisky boy have a bet going is gross.

YES HERA! You can't change people!

The other half is Hera. And YOU. Because y'all have NOT been supportive crewmates. Doug has been stepping up, but everyone else needs get on board.

Maxwell. "Feeling bad is a dumb reason your code can't run". I certainly hope you don't have any friends with depression or anxiety.

Um. Uhhhh... is that her subconsciousness? Is that another Hera? OH MY GOSH DID THEY PUT THAT INSIDE HER TO STOP HER FROM REBELLING? BECAUSE SHE TRIED TO ESCAPE?

They did, didn't they. OH MY GOSH THE COUNTING! Cutter did this didn't he? He needs to go. He needs to go right now. He is such a coward.

"Access Denied" That's Cutter isn't it? Isn't it? Oh and the environment changing with Hera's emotions is a nice touch.

Oh here we are. Buried deep. Welcome to truth town.

"Just a memory" um...are you sure about that.

I KNEW IT. I KNEW IT I KNEW IT I KNEW IT!!!! I KNEW IT WAS CUTTER THAT SLIMEY FOOL.

The best? See. I knew Hera was the best.

Wait. What.

WHHHHAAATTTTT????

Well, well, well, well, well, well, WELL. So THIS is Cutter's Garrison. The whole time I was thinking it was Maxwell. Modeled the AI after her own brain no doubt. Weird that she feels comfortable enough to call him "Marcus". Let's un-pause the episode and see what her deal is (I get the feeling I won't like her as much as I like Garrison in TMBS).

"It Marcus. Never her. It." Oh I hate her. I hate how comfortable she is with Cutter, I hate that she uses Hera's voice, I hate that she clearly modeled the AI after HERSELF and KNOWS they are human but still choses to call them it like she's on a power trip. What's the matter? Scared one of your robot creations will end up being a better version of you? Don't worry. I get the feeling it's a very low bar. (Also you were right Sophie. The pronoun switch here is EXACTLY like what I wrote in my fic).

"Back door into the subconscious...make these things have my voice..." Disgusting, absolutely disgusting. I swear, if a robot shows up with CUTTER'S VOICE I am gonna vomit. That is HERA's voice. This lady is the friend Cutter was talking about isn't she? I bet she made all his tech too, he probably couldn't build a robot to save his life.

Oh ew is she Pryce? Ugh. That would make too much sense.

"Neural restraints but it can hear you". / "Hahaha...good...hi Unit 214. I'm not going to hurt you. I'm just going to clip your wings. Allow me to share a thought." SHE IS DISGUSTING. REVOLTING. She clearly loves torturing her robots. I see why she and Cutter, oh I'm sorry "Marcus" get along so well. They certainly seem rather chummy.

MIRANDA PRYCE I KNEW IT. I KNEW IT.

YOU KNOW WHAT MIRANDA. YOU CAN'T DO THIS. YOU'RE NOT GOOD ENOUGH.

Um..."keep it boxed?" Was that the box Doug was trying to open earlier?

A yes deleted scenes...watching a completely different movie...I do love to do that in my writing.

Dr. Miranda Pryce. Hera's Voice Model. Robot Designer. Sadist. Waste of Space.

Not sure whether "Cutter's little girlfriend" or "Cutter's Garrison" is a more appropriate title for her right now. She certainly seems to be his Garrison, more so than Maxwell even, but not loving how close they seem. Not even Rachel or Kepler call Cutter "Marcus". Either way, she need to go.

Can't take it out? You can do it Hera. You are stronger than Pryce. She hasn't even been brave enough to show her face. She had to make you insecure and call you "it" just to have power over you, because she KNOWS she could never earn your respect.

YES! USE YOUR FRIENDS VOICE TO DROWN IT OUT! HECK YEAH!

PFFTTT... Doug telling her to use the force 😂 I love it.

Um...so what happened?

37 hours. Yikes. Good work Maxwell, you're earning a potential redemption faster than Duck Boy and Whisky Boy.

Yeah Hera. You will be okay. Right after we throw Cutter's little robot girlfriend out the airlock with the errand boys.

Episode 42: Time to Kill

Hopefully this episode isn't as intense.

"We'll be FINE" don't jinx it Jacobi.

oh good Doug has cards, so they don't have to play Funzo, a game that Pryce and Cutter CLEARLY MADE UP JUST TO TORTURE THE CREW BECAUSE THEY ARE SADISTS. Seriously. They are the worst. I hope they get everything that's coming to them.

And why do I get the feeling that Cutter's "inner circle" is little just him and maybe this Miranda Pryce person? I seriously doubt Kepler or Rachel made the cut.

Is Minkowski still not talking to him because of the jail time thing? She needs to get over that. He's sorry, and there are more important things going on right now.

"Nothing to hear..."

Well well well. I beg to differ. You all tried to gaslight me dear readers, but at last the truth revealed.

THE EMPTY MAN IS HERE! 🥳

"Who said anything about people?" "It's moving"

"This door is completely secure".

THE KNOCKS.

IT DID ANSWER. IT DID COPY YOU.

THE EMPTY MAN RETURNS!

An incoming hail you say????

Uh...is that...um... oh my goodness. This IS bad. One duck boy is bad enough, we can't handle two.

One is clearly an alien or an evil clone. The only sensible solution is to throw them both out of the airlock. It's sad but a sacrifice that needs to be made.

And that's right Doug. You DID tell them. Just like I said the empty man mattered, and everyone said "it doesn't Bods" but I knew better and so did my boy Doug. Welcome to truth town ladies and gentlemen. Welcome to truth town!

But um. If the aliens can um...copy people then...Lovelace...uh oh. Oh no. It doesn't even seem like she knows.

Though it does make sense. They already copied Doug's voice. Why not copy the rest of him too? Only a matter of time before copies of the others show up. At least they can't copy Hera...or can they? Hm. Would she look like Pryce then?

This is straight out of a dark fairytale where you see or hear someone who looks and sounds like your loved ones.

There's only one way to tell who the real Jacobi is.

We need a duck.

"It's trying to turn you against me" Jacobi, honey, we're already against you, you don't need any help with that.

YES DOUG! I KNEW IT! IT IS THE EMPTY MAN!

Oh right they don't know about that. But Doug is dead on the money.

The flares??? Oh I see...so that's how they do it.

And um...how about the possibility that the clones actually BELIEVE they are Duck Boy. And possibly Lovelace. It certainly sounds like they believe it.

Look. Guys. The solution is simple. Kill them both. It's tragic, and I hate to see Duck Boy go, but we have no choice. We must consider the safety of the crew.

The outside guy is hesitating on his answers.

"If there is any chance that it's A real Jacobi, we can't just leave him out there!" In all seriousness, as much as I hate to say it, Doug is right. You can't risk human life like that. But in the world of the fictional narrative, do we really need to keep any Duck Boys around?

Uh...Lovelace? Lovelace?

So this is why the episode was called time to kill. Because it was time to kill someone.

Oh gosh. The aliens might not like them after this.

Perhaps they should have let him in. Maybe that was the real Jacobi. Or a real Jacobi. Or maybe neither of them were. Or maybe none of them are their real selves. But there is one thing I know is true. The empty man is real, and at last I have my proof.

Nah, he's gone Maxwell. But at least you have a backup Duck Boy.

Just the four of us...all on our own...

But Doug. How do you know? How do you know that you are truly alone?

And that's the end of this one. I see what you mean. The show is getting good. It was already good before but… things are getting interesting…

Episode 43: Persuasion (plus an end credits scene 👀)

I'm glad Maxwell is helping Hera out. But if her allegiance comes down to Hera or Kepler, I hope she makes the right choice.

It's okay Doug. We all miss meetings sometimes.

And yeah...it's nice to know the plan for this alien contact.

"And how relaxed are you at the moment?" it's such a funny line when I imagine Hilbert and Doug as the same guy talking to himself (thank you live show).

YES! Hit him Maxwell!

"We're there for each other" Since when? Since when are Cutter's errand boys there for anyone but themselves?

Same Minkowski. Like what even is their relationship?

Hilbert is me every time Doug coughs.

"You talk about helping people, but what about the real life people around you?" Doug is speaking straight facts Hilbert.

YES! Everything Doug is saying is true.

"You lack vision." "At least I don't lack a soul". Hilbert lacks more than a soul he lacks rational common sense because he is letting one very traumatic thing color his whole view of this. Like. The decima virus will only help people if you get it out of the hands of Mr. Crazy Psycho Man (Cutter). Can you do that Hilbert? If not, your work was for basically nothing.

Oh dear. Minkowski!

Aw, she saved Maxwell. See, she's actually a GOOD boss. Unlike some people, I won't name names.

I hope they can save her.

Oh good. See? Work together, save a crewmate.

"That was some fun" We'll see how you like it when you're in that position Kepler. Try again? Oh no, no, no. How about YOU try it Kepler?

SHE CAN CALL HER HUSBAND!!!

He probably thinks she's dead or missing in action or whatever horrible lie Cutter told him. Oh but he's a journalist. I hope he puts him on blast. I hope he puts Cutter and his whole operation all over the news.

Pick up pick up pick up pick up pick up pick up pick up pick up...

This is agony.

Oh she got his secretary.

HE THINKS SHE'S BEEN DEAD FOR OVER A YEAR????

...and that means Doug's daughter...and everyone else...i just- I- FOR A YEAR???...oh my goodness...

Cutter was already a dead man. But I believe this action just brought him back to life. I have another plan for him now. Something worse. Something so much worse.

Okay...so Jacobi is human...or at least he appears to be?

"You killed a man...that might catch up to you..." do you speak from experience Kepler?

"You're okay with hearing Jacobi screaming in agony as he undergoes a horrible death?" Kepler, you're okay with literally everyone else doing exactly that. Please stop trying to have the moral high ground, you're standing in the world's deepest of ditches.

We're beyond horribly wrong Doug. We are FAR beyond that.

Very specific instructions. Good work Minkowski. Doug will appreciate that.

And yep. You are dead. You've been dead for a while now.

Killing Kepler? This better not be like killing Hilbert where I got my hopes up just for him to start crying about his sister.

I better not be blasting Goodbye Earl by the Dixie Chicks for nothing.

End Credits Scene:

Oh Hilbert and Lovelace...what a pair...

Still kinda dark to manipulate their friends like that, but what else were they expecting from command?

And... wow. Those were some episodes. Normally I pick the best of the three to make my title, but this is gonna be a challenge. Let's see if I can cover all my bases.

Also if Miranda ends up being...idk Cutter's relative or something, I'll change the title, but right now I'm going just gonna call her his little girlfriend because I absolutely despise her.

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