#just remembered this was in my drafts from when i was like 30% thru the book and worried it wouldnt stick the landing

[emotionsandphenomena]

As Stephen [Ira] left the stage, he quipped, “You know what they say—trans girls play video games, trans boys write slash fiction.”

I hadn’t known that, actually. I was like, Huh. Later I thought about it and I was like, Oh. And then I thought about it some more and I was like, Oh NO. It was going to be incredibly inconvenient and time-consuming, but it was the only path forward: I had to rewrite the whole novel. Fay was trans, and I owed it to the novel to explore the implications of this, which meant I was now writing a trans story.

I’d be lying if I said it never crossed my mind, over the next three years of writing and rewriting, that this might also say something about me. In fact, besides men having sex with each other, I thought of little else. But it was an abstract, hypothetical thought. After all, what was I going to do, transition? I didn’t have time for that. For God’s sake, I was trying to write a novel here

made me shriek-cry-laugh at work. stream idlewild

[lakesbian]

ok listen. this is crucial. this is what ward aisha is to me in my mind palace.

aisha for the largest part of worm is Thirteen. alec is 15. they're both incredibly dysfunctional traumatized kids who like each other a whole lot living thru some crazy shit. and the one time aisha really has fun is when she gets to play at being on top of the world with alec, living out the rich-with-no-dumb-adults-but-brian-telling-us-what-to-do teenage dream w her best friend. she's Thirteen. her sole vision for the future is that the undersiders will keep winning and she and her Cool Hot Funny Best Friend Who Is The Only Person Who's Ever Gotten Her are going to be cool and tough and richer than god and paint each others nails in their cool shared supervillain base while the world fears, but more importantly, knows the names of Imp and Regent. her big brother has had unimaginably awful things happen to him and she can't fix it even an ounce, she's fucked up and has spent her life feeling invisible and she knows it, her best friend is fucked up too and she knows it, but she still gets to have this: the success as a villain, her legacy, the legacy as someone memorable with her best friend and her team that's so nearly within her grasp. despite it all, she's just a kid, and when she's texting alec a news article about herself or idly dreaming about installing a pool in her base, she barely even remembers the blood it's taken to get there. for a moment of her life she thinks this will never end and she'll finally get to be Seen, seen by her best friend, seen for everything great they're going to do together.

and then--she's 13--she watches her best friend kill himself in front of her, for her, and she's never going to get to tell him another secret, or make another dick joke with him, or be imp and regent on top of the world together. and her brother is even more unreachable than ever and one of the people she respects most in the whole world is gone and she's alone again, unseen, dealing w/ all this blood and no more prize at the end of the rope.

when we see her at the end of worm, she's fixated on the idea of establishing a Cool Villainous Legacy as the Badass Supervillain Imp, impressive enough to become what she and regent could've been together, but, like.

all she's actually doing is taking care of a bunch of traumatized children and going around stopping people from being terrible to each other. she wishes she were a villain. she's a charmingly edgy vigilante at worst. she spends 30 minutes straight making fish puns, stopping said traumatized children from getting into trouble, and preventing a dude from torturing ppl and hoarding resources. and then she pats herself on the back for another Successfully Villainous Act. and also while she's doing all this she's intentionally memorializing and safekeeping the legacies of taylor & alec (not brian because wildbow is a clown idiot buffon fuck but in my mind palace she's doing it for brian as well). all ppl she loved and lost, and she's desperately trying to prevent them from fading into the same obscurity as her.

so like. To Me. To Me. the reason she's still talking to herself about building her own legacy, about her own legacy being that as a Cool Villain--is because she's not ready to face that that dream from her childhood has long been dead in the water, that she's now a lonely person whose life is about tromping around in snow-proof cargo pants and making enough breakfast for all these fuckin' kids and yelling at people to be decent to each other. everyone who would've seen her has been left long behind in one tragedy or another, and on some level, she's not fully accepting that this is her life now: being the one who's left. the one whose legacy is just to carry the legacies of her friends who died too young around in her heart.

so To Me. ward aisha is abt like. i will have to rotate this in my mind further to determine more, this is the first draft of Thoughts, but to me ward aisha should 100% be about her coming to terms with the fact that she's grown up and having 2 memorialize the her that her 13yo self wanted to grow into as much as she has 2 memorialize her other lost loved ones. like scene queen kid aisha growing into an adult during a post-apocalypse where there are no longer hot topics to rob blind but she can still have silly fun hair dye for the her 7 years ago that really loved neon purple. not to fucking mention the thing where her brother comes back and they both have 2 reckon w how much she's grown and the fact that she was aspiring to be like a mini-him but if he was genuinely in touch with the emotions of the kids he's taking care of.

like what if you were an older brother and you died and then you came back and your immature little sister was almost as old as you now and bigger and taller and good at taking care of people Emotionally in the way that you never could 4 her. what then. wouldn't that be fucked up or what. aisha and brian my best friend aisha and brian

[monsterkissed]

You said you liked to share BNGN trivia, so you got any tidbits?

some assorted trivialities (spoilers for a fanfic up to the latest chapter):

the fic was originally envisioned (and partly written) as a series of drabbles! if i had kept that going, it would currently be 5,376 drabbles long.

tiramisu was written into the outline entirely as bait/tribute to my partners, who are big siamese fans. she is now the most popular oc i have ever made for anything. i considered writing an origin story fic for her back when there was a jjba oc zine in the works, but it fell thru and now it only lives in my head. it involves multiple murders : )

bngn is not phf-compliant bc i did not want to read it. to make up for this i promise to find other horrible things for fugo to go through instead <3

probably not news to anyone by this point but here is some explicit confirmation: the first prologue that opens the fic is not about doppio

there are so many cases of foreshadowing in the form of jokes or joke-adjacent statements at this point that i cannot actually remember them all. if you see me make a silly comment in this fic there is at least a 20% chance it's actually a very sneaky mean comment hiding behind the linear progression of time

when i first drafted the outline act 3 was much much shorter and had a few drastic differences. one of these was that polnareff (or at least one of him) would have survived to support the gang much as he does in the original VA, but i could not think of anything fun for him to do that didn't detract from everything else, or at least nothing more fun than the inexplicable spectacle of two dead polnareffs after all of the build-up towards him. rip, rip.

speaking of fun: i wanted to have every major character get at least one really cool moment, regardless of how central they were to the story. i didn't want anyone to feel like you could cut them out completely and it wouldn't matter, i wanted to keep that ensemble feel of VA and give everyone room to affect the story in important ways, even if the fic still obviously has its focusses. of the ones i've published so far, i think i like mista's intervention in the Trish & Dop vs Fugo fight best out of those moments because i just had so much fun writing and visualising it and he felt like a natural fit to provoke fugo's own position in the story as a person fixated on the objective facts (which he was canonically Not Wrong about, in terms of sticking with bruno being a dubious plan for anyone fond of staying alive) to face off against someone who operates more on vibes and rolling the dice.

way back in the depths of drabble-draft the flashbacks were going to occur chronologically, followed by the present day stuff. but as i became aware that this was growing into something i realised that this would be stitching two pretty drastically different fics together back to back, and decided instead to use the current format. in theory this was purely going to allow me to show doppio's relationship with diavolo alongside his absence from him, so we can see simultaneously why he values and misses him so much and what he's becoming without him. in practice it led to a bunch of smaller changes that built up into, among other things, the premise of the entire canon divergence. technically, all of the flashbacks in act 1 and 2 "take place" during ch. 30. there is an implication to this that so far nobody has commented on ;)

i spent an amount of time researching macdonalds in italy that i will never ever get back

speaking of researching things that don't matter to anyone but me: everywhere a major scene happens is based on a specific spot i hand-picked on google maps. i roamed a lot of italian countryside via satellite trying to find the Exact kind of big, ugly, concrete-floored farm i had in mind for the first secco fight

technically this fic (or at least the extended universe around it) has sorbet and gelato VA-style origin stories to go with their fanstands (which i had a lot of fun with, workshopping around ideas for things that would make for excellent and suitably juicy assassination tools but vulnerable in a stand vs stand battle). much like tiramisu, so does my second stand-using oc brodo (who also cameos in 'I Think We're Alone Now', because skulking around trying not to be noticed is his speciality) the third, katarina, is only mostly goncharov-inspired, and Heart of Glass was originally going to be one of the chapter titles for this fic. another song with a very similar title still will be!

i had no intention of narancia being as big a presence in the fic as he was, but the longer i wrote the more i realised that he's just too fun to put in a room with doppio. the scene where he accepts the truth made me feel genuinely like a bit of a horrible person because i'd enjoyed building up their friendship so much and it was one of those chapters where i knew Exactly what the character would want to do and exactly why it would be the thing that would hurt them the most.

when i was hammering out the outline for what would become this fic an artist i had been following released a song that i put on in the background while i wrote, and then stopped writing and went back to listen to it properly twelve or thirteen times because it was eerily vibing perfectly with some of the themes i had been kicking around in my head trying to make something out of. it put a few seeds in my head in the way that some things serendipitously do, so much so that i almost named the whole fic after it. in the end, i decided to affix it to just one chapter where i felt it would best set the tone for the imminent descent to come. that chapter would be chapter thirty-eight.

[frosted-night]

Jack Frost Designs Review

Yes it’s finally his time. This is going to include his book designs including previous incarnations in said books. There are more movie concept designs than book so, let’s dig in shall we?

This was in fact the first ever Jack Joyce designed while he came up with The Guardians Of Childhood. He even comes with his own backstory! (Which was cut. Sorry Joyce posts walls of text so it’s a girthy read.)

So instead of a young mischievous trickster, we got a much more depressing story of Jack. (Jack by default is sad obviously) but this one... It kind of hits differently and almost reminds me of the story he crafted for Pitch. A dad who tried to defend his family but through tragic events was ripped from them and changed completely. Design wise, he’s a lot more tree than snow. There doesn’t exist a colored version of this so we’ll never know if he sported winter and dull dead leaf colors rather than grassy greens.This Jack has a weird presence to him, I can’t put my finger on it. Rating: 6/10 He’s really neat! Just a little too Autumn feeling rather than a blend of both Autumn and Winter.

Nightlight feels like the baby evolution if Jack was a pokemon and that's what I’m gonna stick with. Below is a more recent version of him colored.

In all honesty that one is easier on the eyes proportion wise because sometimes Joyce has ‘interesting’ anatomy choices but we aint going into that today. It’s interesting how his hair somehow looks shorter and longer than Jack’s at the same time. Could be because the longer strands float seamlessly but star boy hair physics what can ya do. It’s a little hard to tell what is his skin and what is his armor, so that is a casuality in making a character only have one or two colors in their color scheme. I love other artist’s depictions of Nightlight but the canon one feels a little weak color wise. Rating: 5/10 Sorry, get some better LEDs and then come back.

Here we have a book Jack but I can’t entirely recall if this was used in the books or not. I digress. This design looks like him still wearing very Nightlight-esque armor/clothing and slowly growing into his new persona as Jack Frost. The intricacies are hard to make out but we’ll work with it. This one is very interesting to me because he very much looks like an older teen close to young adult. His hair looks very fluffy too. Not many complaints about this one but not much praise either.

Rating: 6/10 Not great but doesn’t stand out that much.

Remember when I said Joyce had ‘interesting’ anatomy decisions? Jack looks like he has half a head here and it bothers me GREATLY. This is the adult Jack design he went with. Supposedly he likes the opera and he sure looks it. This! Exists!! Kind of wish it didn’t. The outfit is nice but it just doesn’t fit Jack as a whole. This just screams to me that it’s someone else with a similar-ish hairstyle.

Rating: 3/10 Guess he’d be the...Phantom Of The Opera. (I’ll go home and so should he.)

And finally the final Jack. This is the one that almost exactly resembles the Jack we got in the movies(Probably because it was made after the movie but w/e) but just add a cape on him. I can’t really tell if hes got a hoodie and a cape, or just a cloak+hood on top of a sweatshirt. It isn’t too important because my thoughts on this one are obvious. Rating: 10/10 Edna Mode would have a field day with you boy.

MOVIE DESIGN TIME

Joyce claims this is a design he drafted when Leonardo DiCaprio was considered to voice Jack and I can kind of see that with how his face is drawn here. This Jack looks a lot more like a warrior and less of that trickster look. I can’t say I’m a fan of the weird antenna his hood has but his sword is really cool looking.

Rating: 4/10 Nice bow and sword but it can’t save your fashion choices.

This looks like a lanky 11-13 year old who would put rocks or slugs in my shoes and relish in my disgust. He has the exact look of a snot nose kid and I’m unsure how to feel about it.

His various hairstyles drafted here sort of make him softer looking or just more of a snot nose, no in between. Maybe even an Anime Protagonist.

The top right one almost looks like Hiccup from How To Train Your Dragon if you squint. It’ll be a little hard to rate them all as one individual but why not.

Rating: 5/10 I don’t hate them but they aren’t my cup of tea.

AH- IS THAT A FUCKIN GREMLIN?

Oh wait no it isn’t he looks like a 10 year old. Whatever don’t feed him after midnight. The staff’s design of not being shaped like a G is an interesting tidbit but the whole design looks like he’s really young or like a troll etc. This Jack looks like he thinks girls have cooties uses outdated slang.

Rating: 4/10 This is me being generous.

It honestly looks like he hiked his pants up all the way to his chest. A late teen with horrid fashion choices once again. Not many other thoughts here.

Rating: 2/10 Get a sweater on or something.

This is one is very interesting looking to me. His clothes looked a lot more leather based and very human-like. The tatters, tears and frays all make him look like he was a victim of an accident that never changed his clothes. It makes me wonder if this Jack had the same death as the final movie Jack or something else entirely. Either way, this one looks like hes a mid to late teen which really adds to my intrigue.

This was another image that greatly resembled the design so I included it here. It almost looks like his skin is blue here which is pretty neat to me at least. He’s also got leaf motifs here, which from the first Jack design Joyce made, we can see a pattern here.

Rating: 8 /10 I was originally weirded out by his head but now its not so bad.

This Jack is definitely dressed more like a nature boy rather than him having human influenced fashion and it’s an appealing touch. The tiny leaf sprouting from his staff is also kind of cute since the designers seemed to want to put leafs somewhere on his designs. His hairstyle is also very cute but it reminds me of Sasuke Uchiha in a sense. (Not a setback for me at least)

Rating: 7/10 13 year old Jack is going thru a phase.

I thought this Jack didn’t show up again in story boards but I was wrong!

They look a little different from each other but just similar enough to pair together, so bare with me. The first one obviously has looser pants, slightly longer sleeves and got his leaf motif going. This second Jack is a VERY green. It gives the impression that this Jack made his clothes out of plants and natural materials. Again I’m not wholly sure if greens fit his color scheme but they sure went for it for a while. I can’t say I’m a fan of it because it heavily reminds me of Peter Pan.

However a very similar looking Jack could be found in this storyboard. It doesn’t look as green as the other storyboards made it out to be and looks more like dead grass. Which is a pretty nice touch.

Rating: 5/10 I don’t hate it but it just doesn’t vibe yknow.

Speaking of a vibe...hoo this certainly has one.  This Jack isn’t old but certainly doesn’t look very young, maybe in the 20-30 range, thats just me. He has facial features that remind me of Pitch but resembles the Jack Frost of Santa Clause 3

That being said, I wondered if him looking similar to Pitch was in the storyline of them being brothers.(Which was a scrapped thing, who knew.) He’s a bit more menacing in this design but certainly seems like he relishes in his work.

Rating: 4/10 I’d make it a lower score but I gotta give it props

NOW THIS JACK IS KINDA INTERESTING. This one looks like he’s 16 and going through a grunge phase. He’s gonna play Nirvana loudly and not turn it down even if you tell him too. His staff itself has mini icicles hanging off of it and leafs look stuck to his shirt. Did you glue or staple those on Jack? His hair also looks much longer than his other designs and I kind of dig it( Shut up I’m bias.) I’m not wholly sure why else this design has stuck with me but it just has something about it that I just love. I wish there was a full body drawing of it.

(He also kinda has the same hair as the Jack Frost in Runescape but I wont go on about that hoo hoo)

Rating: 9/10 *Bad Boy by Cascada plays in the distance*

This one definitely feels like middleschooler trying to be in a band. His sticks just resemble drumsticks to me what can I say. I’m a big fan of his shoes and his color scheme screams a hibernating tree in winter. His hair also looks like it’s covered in frost rather than it being wholly white, which is very neat!! He looks like he wants to fight but has slight hesitance. Overall a very balanced Jack.

Rating: 8/10 He’s ready for band practice

Not many thoughts here, I just found these tiny Jack designs cute. His hoodie being a jacket instead just adds to the charm of this one.

No talk to him he angy.

Rating: 6/10 fun sized boi

Now this Jack resembles the one earlier that dressed entirely in leather brown colors, however he clearly is different than that one. I’m gonna say it, he looks like a zombie or undead in this design and its pretty fucking gnarly. I don’t know whats going on with his hair but I’m gonna assume it’s just the wind making it look like that. He just has the vibe that he was once human but was turned into something else entirely. It isnt in uncanny territory but borders that. This version of Jack meeting Pitch and the others would have been *very* interesting. Rating: 7/10 Eat a twinkie Jack you’ll feel better.

The final design! I can’t complain much about this one. The way his staff subtly has a G shape and a hexagon(his signature shape) is a wonderful touch. Additionally, the way the frost is gathered mostly where his hand is such an intricate detail. His signature hoodie is iconic at this point so I can’t bad mouth that either.(I can’t anyway because there's no complaints from me here.) Although, I never understood the leather straps that his pants had or their functions. I couldn’t find any colonial outfits that resembled Jack’s pants so its a total mystery to me at least.

And I can’t go on about this design until I mention the snowflake pattern in his eyes

Pure beauty. It’s at a hue of blue that almost looks impossible to have, combined with the electric blue color of the snowflake in his eyes. The amount of detail in this movie amazes me to this day. Rating: One Great Blizzard <3/10

[winterscaptain]

inherited.

Aaron Hotchner x Fem!Reader a joyful future fic

a/n: this popped into my head fully formed. when i thought too hard about it, i cried. It’s sweet. enjoy! tell me what you think! this takes place in au!october 2022

words: 2k warnings: language, tooth-rotting fluff

summary: “i don’t have stepchildren, i have children who happened to be born before i met them.” – unknown

masterlist | a joyful future masterlist | ajf faq | requests closed!

You’re laid out flat on the bed, tooling around on your phone, when Jack comes in, gets a running start, and flops onto the bed beside you. His feet hang off the opposite side yours do, your heads close together. 

Elliot and the girls are napping the early afternoon away, Jack had an early-release day from school, Aaron’s taking a half-day, and Isaac’s still stuck on that 750-piece puzzle on your office floor. You left one of the baby monitors in the nursery and one with him, just in case. The faint, staticky sound of him talking to himself grumbles through the little speaker on Aaron’s bedside table.

Jack doesn’t say anything, but pulls his phone out and starts doing whatever newly-minted seventeen-year-olds do on his phone beside you. 

You, on the other hand, need to take care of an email from Aaron.

To: hotchner2@fbi.justice.gov From: hotchner@fbi.justice.gov

CC: prentiss@fbi.justice.gov

SSA Hotchner, 

See attached for your quarterly performance evaluation from your supervisor, BAU Unit Chief SSA Emily Prentiss, cc’d here. Please direct any questions or concerns to SSA Prentiss. 

Best, SSA Aaron Hotchner, J.D. Northeast Investigations and Operations Support Section Chief Quantico, VA

P.S. Leaving the office in 30. See you soon xx

You draft a quick reply and send it. 

To: hotchner@fbi.justice.gov From: hotchner2@fbi.justice.gov

Received. 

Thanks, Hotch. 

Best, SSA _______ Hotchner Behavioral Analysis Unit, Quantico, VA

P.S. Come in quietly thru the garage - C, S, E are still out.

With a roll of your eyes, you put your phone down and take a moment to look at Jack. 

He’s nearly a man, the baby fat falling from his jaw and cheekbones, getting taller by the day. Much to Aaron’s chagrin, they’re about the same height now. 

Jack’s eyes flicker from his phone and meet yours for a split second. “What?”

“Just lookin’ at you.”

A little puff of a laugh leaves his nose. “Why?”

One side of your mouth lifts. “I know you’re tired of hearing this, but if you ever have kids of your own, you’ll get it.” 

He hums, tossing his phone onto the pillow behind him. “Well, yeah. I got that, but why?”

You roll onto your side, curling your legs fully onto the bed. It’s a good question, and one for which you’re not sure you have an answer. Thinking for a moment, you sigh. “So, with you, for example. I can’t really put it into words, but you’re a bit of a miracle.” 

He squints (just like Aaron) and you continue. 

“I have the privilege of being your mom, which is a title that isn’t really mine.” You tuck the inside of your lip between your teeth, trying to figure out how to articulate it. 

It’s not that I don't want to be your mom but in the world where I’m not your mom, Haley is still here.

But there are some days I miss her so much I wish I didn’t have to be your mom. She was always going to be ‘mom.’

But then it’s the best thing in the world to be your mom and I wouldn’t want it any other way…

Fuck. 

You start slow. “It’s a bit of a bittersweet thing. I never expected to be ‘mom’ to you while Haley was alive. No matter what would have or could have happened between your dad and me, Haley is your mom. So, the knowledge that we’re here - you and I, in this house with your brothers and sisters and your dad, the way we are - is very much grounded in Haley’s absence.” 

You shake your head, realizing you’re getting off topic. “All this to say, it’s a bit of a miracle that I get to be your mom, and not just mom to those other little gremlins infesting this house.” 

You both smile. 

“And sometimes, I just need to stare at you, make sure you’re real, and sit in that kind of...feeling that I can’t quite articulate.” 

Jack’s been listening the whole time, his brown eyes soft and open. “I think I get that. It makes sense - even if you and Dad still got married and had more kids, Haley would be ‘Mom’ and you would be...something else.” 

You smile a little. “I guess you could say I inherited the title, in some ways.” 

“That’s a good way to put it.” His eyes wander up to the ceiling, pensive. 

“You know, I can’t remember a time when you weren’t around. Like, not every memory has you in it because you weren’t always there, but...there isn’t a single, like, phase of my life when you weren’t in it.” 

It's your turn to listen. 

“And I don’t remember my mother very well. You and Dad always made sure I knew who she was - I feel like I know everything about her, but like…” He trails off for a second before looking back at you. “She still feels like a stranger, a little bit.” 

You nod. “Someone distant, maybe?”

“Yeah. Like I feel connected to her and everything but you’re my mom. You’ve always been that person for as long as I can remember. I can’t imagine anything else.” He shakes his head a little. “It wouldn’t be right to call you anything else.”

A shaky breath leaves you through your mouth, unexpected tears springing into your eyes. Since you’re on the deep end of the conversation pool, you switch gears a little. “Is it ever weird? Having the little ones around? Your dad and I having more kids?” 

He immediately shakes his head. “Nah. I can really remember when it was just the two of us - me ‘n Dad - and then then three of us after that one Christmas. But I don’t really miss it? Like, sometimes it gets so fucking loud in this house -”

“Language,” you chastise. It’s weak, at best. 

He snorts, revising. “Sometimes, it gets really loud in this house and I have those moments of like, ‘oh my god why are they so loud why can’t it just be me and Mom and Dad again,’ but they never last long.” He laughs a little. “Like right now, they’re just in the other room napping and I miss them.” 

“You know when you laugh like that you look just like your mother?”

That sunshine smile breaks across his face again. “Yeah?”

“Mhmm.” You reach out to him, brushing the apple of his cheek with the side of your finger - just a second, just an affectionate little bit of contact. His smile gets wide enough that you’re treated to one dimple. “But those,” you poke the little indent by the corner of his mouth and he screws his face up. “Those are all your dad’s.”

Jack grows pensive again. “Dad said he’d tell me about the divorce if I wanted to ask.” 

Many of your conversations bounce around like this. Fifteen years of life together make up for seemingly contextless non-sequiturs. You know, just like you do with Aaron, he has more to say. 

You wait him out.

“If I asked, would you tell me?”

With a sigh, “I can tell you how it was for me as their friend, but I won’t speak for Dad or Haley.” 

Jack nods, understanding. “What was it like? Like, the...actual divorce? Did you get caught in the middle?”

“It sucked. It really sucked, but no, I never got caught up in it that way. Sure, they vented to me about each other after it was all over - which,” you add, “by the way, was its own form of comedy.” 

That gets a smile out of Jack.

“But they never asked me to tell them they were right or made me feel like I had to choose a side. I would have hated to become a carrier pigeon for their bullshit.” With a chuckle: That’s a recipe for disaster.”

“Ah yeah, miscommunication as a plot device. We covered that in English last semester.” 

You laugh. “Exactly. Even then, though, they loved each other so much and they both tried their hardest to make it work, but couldn’t.” 

Jack’s thinking again, looking more and more pressed by the minute as he stares at the ceiling. 

“What?” You ask. 

“I just -” His mouth presses into a thin line, revealing a dimple, and you thank your lucky stars you love Aaron as much as you do because right now, you’re looking at his clone. “I just...I’m trying to think of something that could, like, break you and Dad up...but I literally can’t think of anything. You guys just work.” 

He’s thinking out loud, finding the question as he goes. You let him. “Even as mad as you get at each other sometimes, I’ve never been afraid. Even when you’re upset with each other you’re still...I dunno...like, two parts of the same person?” He shakes his head. “That doesn’t make sense.”

“No, my love, it does. Your father and I…” 

You sigh, knowing you’re exposing yourself for the person you are, instead of hiding behind your role as a parent.

“...we need each other too much, perhaps to a fault. He’s my favorite person and my biggest weakness. There isn’t much I wouldn’t do for him, and I know he’s the same way about me.” You pause. “We don’t really know how not to be a team.”

Jack’s seen that in them almost all his life. It doesn't surprise him. He’s not sure he believes in soulmates, but he’d imagine you and Aaron are pretty damn close. 

His mouth twists. “I’d imagine a lot of people feel that way until the shit hits the fan.” 

You nod, your head wavering from side to side. “Well...yeah. Not everyone feels that way about their spouse, though.”

“Sure,” he relents, looking a bit like a lawyer. “But if they do, how do you get to that place where you call it quits, you know? How do you decide you don’t need each other or love each other? And how do you know who’s wrong?”

Good question. 

“I mean, it’s less about who’s wrong, and more about who’s right that causes all the trouble, I think, at least from an outside perspective. With your parents, they were both right in a lot of ways.”

You think for a minute, changing directions a bit. “When there are two right answers that are mutually exclusive, there’s not much you can do. Nobody’s wrong - everyone just wants what they want, and there isn’t a clear compromise. Sometimes, the compromise is too much...So, you can still love each other but not be married, like your dad and Haley.” 

“Your mom left,” you continue, “because she reached a breaking point. Her needs and your dad’s needs were mutually exclusive - no compromise existed. And, again, in a lot of ways, they were both right.” 

You shrug, admitting, “They both made bad choices and mistakes in that process, but nobody was the bad guy. In some ways, that’s harder. You love them, but you can’t have them in your life in that way.”

His face clears up. “That makes a lot of sense, actually. Like, I’m thinking about friends and stuff - how some friends are really great outside of school but I would never want to do a group project with them - but for...you know, marriage.” 

You laugh. “Yeah, it’s a lot like that. And you were just about the only thing your parents could agree on at any given time.” 

“Really?”

“Yep. They love you, and always want what’s best for you.” Your eyes flicker to the photo on Aaron’s dresser - the one of you and Haley and Jack nearly fifteen years ago, sandwiching his cheeks in kisses. “When you’re a good parent with that kind of mindset, it’s easy to work as a team for your children.”

“Like you and Dad.” 

“Like me and Dad.” 

Jack quiets for a minute. “Can I tell you something?”

You turn toward him, reaching kind of up and away for his hand. Your clasped fingers end up between your faces. “Always, my love.”

“Sometimes...Sometimes, I wish I looked more like you.” 

Your brow pinches. “Why?” The question is soft, all curiosity. 

“I dunno? I think I just like, want to resemble you because you’re my mom, you know?”

You let out a laugh. “Jack you have no idea. You should ask your father how much you resemble me.”

He shakes his head, a confused little smile on his face. “I don’t get it.” 

“You have picked up eighty percent of my mannerisms and it drives your dad up the wall.” You sit up, releasing his hand and ruffling his soft dark hair as you pretzel-cross your legs. “So if we’re going by his book, you inherited plenty from me. In fact, more than enough.”

“Alright, see, now that makes sense.” Jack sits up across from you right as the door from the garage opens. 

You both wait, quiet, with little smiles on your faces, listening to his car keys hit the kitchen counter (and slide a little - he tossed them), the short walk to his office where he sets his briefcase down and removes his suit jacket (to be hung up later, if he remembers). You can hear him travel to your office, checking on Isaac and looking for you, before taking the stairs two at a time to the baby’s room. 

Jack looks over his shoulder and you follow his gaze, tuned into the baby monitor. There’s a shaky kind of sigh that crackles through the speaker, and you can almost see him reaching into the crib. 

“If he wakes that baby up,” you say, dead serious, “I’ll kill him.”

Jack sniffs, all business. “I’ll grab the shovel and trash bags and you drive, yeah?”

You offer your hand. Jack shakes on it before dissolving into a fit of conspiratorial giggles. He falls into you, turning so his back is against your chest and his head tipped back against your shoulder.

It’s moments like this where he feels five years old again. 

As big as he is and as much of a shit as he can be, he’s still the same boy.  

The pair of you are so caught up in your own private joke that you don’t hear Aaron as he crosses the house and leans on the door jamb. When you both catch sight of him, it only makes you laugh harder. You wrap your arms around Jack, trapping him close to you as you hook your chin over his shoulder. 

He’s examining you both, brow a little furrowed, mouth a little open in an almost-smile. He’s seen the Mom and Jack Show before - it’s a series that started about ten years ago with about a thousand episodes and no cancellation in sight. “What on earth are you two doing in here?”

Jack drops into a deadpan. “Hypothetically plotting your demise for the hypothetical instance that you hypothetically wake Elliot and hypothetically deprive Mom of her hypothetical peace and quiet.”

Aaron nods, as if deeply considering it. “I see. Well, luckily, we’ve narrowly avoided that hypothetical scenario.”

You smile at him. “So thus, you live another day. Congratulations.” 

Aaron breaks with a smile, his commitment to the bit evaporating in the presence of two of his favorite faces. He toes off his shoes and crosses to you both, still all wrapped up and letting little laughs escape. He kisses Jack on the head and you lightly on the lips before flopping down on his back with a satisfied sigh.

You share a devious glance with Jack. Aaron throws a pillow over his face, his voice muffled. 

“Yeah, alright, you two. That’s enough.” 

+++

tagging: @arganfics @quillvine @stxrryspencer @agenthotchner @wandaswitxh @hurricanejjareau @ughitsbaby @rousethemouse @criminalsmarts @shrimpyblog @genevievedarcygranger @ssaic-jareau @good-heavens-chris-evans @angelsbabey @writefasttalkevenfaster @venusbarnes @hotchsflower @ogmilkis @marvels-agents100 @hotchslatte @risenfox @mrs-dr-reid @captain-christopher-pike @dwellingsofrosie @pan-pride-12 @sunshine-em @jdougl-love @sageellsworth05 @dreila03 @forgottenword @aaronhotchnerr @ssa-morgan @buckybau @tegggeeee @abschaffer2 @ssacandice-ray @ellyhotchner @lotties-journey-abroad @mrs-joel-pimentel-23-25 @laneygthememequeen @violentvulgarvolatile @mooneylupinblack @ssareidbby @violet-amxthyst @zizzlekwum @lcvischmitt @qvid-pro-qvo @mandylove1000 @simsiddy @jeor @synonymforlame @roses-and-grasses @bwbatta @capricorngf @missdowntonabbey @averyhotchner @cevanswhre @joanofarkansass @infinity1321 @popped-weasels @evee87 @nuvoleincielo @spencerelds @ssahotchnerr @this-broken-band-girl @winqhster @reidtomestyles @hotch-meeeeeuppppp @the-falling-in-the-danger @nattylite49 @crazyshannonigans @softbibxtch @iconicc @mangoberry43

[chilling-seavey]

oh ok what about a blurb for sc where Daniel and Marigold go on their first date?

↳  A/N Such an iconic moment and such a simple yet special night🥺

↳ Word Count: 3793

↳ Seasons Change Taglist: @stuffofseaveyy @randomlimelightxxx @jonahlovescoffee @hiya-its-amber @hopinglimelight @onlyangelavery @sbrewer21 @bessonsbxtch @viamiasoncrack @the-girl-who-cried-wolf @21burritoseavey @queenseavey23​ @xkelsev - Please click the link in my bio to be added to the taglist!

May 16, 2008

Daniel was sure that if he bit his lip any harder, he would draw blood. The high school hallways were bustling with students who all spoke and shouted over each other as they gathered their things after final bell before the weekend. The slamming of lockers and bumping of bodies didn’t even seem to phase Daniel as he stared right down the hallway to where Marigold was standing.

She had her hair in braids that day and she smiled so widely when Daniel gave her a weak compliment in first period. Even just thinking about it now had his stomach in knots. He had never been smooth and never been flirty and even that simple statement in passing made him nervous.

They had talked almost every day since they officially met in first period English. There was nothing Daniel looked forward to more than her sweet ‘Good morning, Daniel’ every day as she walked into the classroom and took her seat behind him. Talking with his friends at lunch led him to accept that he had a wholehearted crush on her and if he didn’t ask her out he would be royally doomed.

Thing is, Daniel made that realization only two weeks after they met and planned to ask her out on Valentine’s day but totally chickened out. Three months later, he was driving himself insane for putting it off so long. His friends said if he didn’t ask her out that week then they would do it for him and wouldn’t that be embarrassing.

It was Friday. After the last bell. He couldn’t put it off any longer.

With one more nervous pet to his hair and a straightening of his back, he made his way over. Marigold glanced up at him as he approached.

“Hey.” she grinned, “You never come visit me. What do I owe the pleasure?”

Daniel licked his lips nervously as he watched her tuck her binders into her rose patterned backpack.

When he didn’t answer, she looked back at him with a chuckle, “Hello?”

Daniel rose his eyes to hers and took a deep breath, “Do you wanna go out with me this weekend?”

A sweet smile played at the corner of Marigold’s mouth as she slung her zipped up bag over her shoulder and closed her locker, “I’m at my grandparents’ this weekend but I’m free tonight.”

Daniel’s eyes went wide, his breath stuttering in his chest for a moment, “Tonight? Tonight…y-yeah, okay, yeah, I can do tonight.”

“Okay.” Marigold nodded in agreement. “I gotta go…mom’s waiting…but message me on AIM with a time and place.”

“Yeah.” Daniel breathed out, watching her rush off past him with a hurried ‘bye!’ and into the hallway crowded with teenagers. He couldn’t hold back the little air punch in celebration for that and he hurried off into the crowd in the opposite direction before anyone could see his bit of a happy dance.

The moment Daniel got home, he was rushing towards the basement, “I need the computer! I need the computer!”

He nearly threw himself into the computer room, only to find his older brother already there.

“I’m mid-game.” Christian said without looking up. “You can have it after dinner.”

“No. No, no, I need it now. Please.” Daniel stood over him impatiently.

“For what?”

“None of your business.”

“I need to know to decide if it’s worth stopping my game.”

“It is! I need to get on AIM, like, now.”

Christian paused his playing and looked up at his brother, “Is it a girl?”

With the distraction that obviously worked, Daniel threw himself on his brother’s lap and unplugged the game controller and closed the window himself. Christian shouted at him in protest and Daniel did his best to hold his older brother back as he opened up AIM and found Marigold’s contact – labeled as ‘online’ - and drafted a super rushed message.

C u at 6 for dinner?

“Mom! Daniel is hogging the computer!” Christian shouted towards the stairs. “And rubbing his nasty butt on me!”

Daniel ignored him, muttering under his breath as he saw the typing icon pop up, “Come on, come on.”

Yes. Where?

I’ll pick u up

A smiley thumbs up emoticon came through as is reply just as Christian shoved him off his lap and onto the carpeted floor. Daniel only picked himself up with ease and tossed the controller at his older brother’s head.

“Go play your stupid game while I have a date with a real girl.”

He rushed for the stairs before Christian could smack him for the diss.

By 5:30, Daniel had showered and dressed in pants and a button-up and fixed his hair three times in the mirror in his room. He grabbed his jacket and keys and hurried for the door. He made it right out to the driveway before realizing he was forgetting something.

Marigold thought farther ahead than Daniel did – that wasn’t odd – and her address was waiting for him in their AIM messages when he returned to the computer. He scribbled it down on a scrap piece of paper and nearly tripped up the stairs on his way back upstairs to type it into the old GPS in his hand-me-down truck. Daniel wasn’t necessarily a clumsy guy but the nervousness that was pumping through him certainly made that his momentary unfortunate reality. He even forgot to take the car out of park before trying to back out of the driveway. A marigold flower that he had picked from his mother’s garden rested in the cupholder.

The robotic voice of the GPS led him through the suburban streets of West Hartford to a red brick Tudor house with lush gardens and a perfectly trimmed lawn. Daniel lingered in the driveway for a moment, staring up at the front door that was framed by two small lights, waiting for him. He took a deep breath, stepped out of his old truck, and walked cautiously up the few stone steps to the hedge trimmed front porch. He barely knocked on the wood door before it was pulled open, revealing Marigold on the other side.

His heart did a little skip.

“Hi.” she said sweetly.

Daniel tried to word his response as he stared at her with her long blonde hair left in their natural waves and her face dusted in light makeup. He finally got out a soft, “Hi. You…look so good.”

Marigold tucked her hair behind her ear, “Thank you. You look good too.”

Daniel shifted and held out the marigold flower to her, “I…would have brought more but this was kinda last minute.”

“Well aren’t you as sweet as sugar?” Marigold giggled as she took it from him and twirled it between her fingers, “But my favourite flowers are hydrangeas.”

“Shit.” Daniel muttered.

“Just remember for next time.” she said as she closed the front door behind her.

Daniel nodded lightly, “Next time.”

They headed to his truck and he opened the door for her and held out a hand to help her up the slightly large step into the passenger seat. Marigold thanked him with a smile and took his hand although the way she easily hopped in meant she really didn’t need any sort of help.

“Where are we going?” Marigold asked once Daniel turned the key in the rumbling ignition.

“It’s a surprise.” Daniel said, switching the truck into reverse and tucked his hand behind her chair to back out of the driveway.

Marigold smiled over at him, “I like surprises.”

“Don’t get your hopes up.” Daniel added quickly.

“Don’t second guess yourself.” she retorted, although her tone was gentle.

Their eyes met briefly from across the front seat of the truck and Daniel looked back quickly to the road, stuttering to a stop at a crosswalk. Marigold reached out a hand to the dashboard.

“Sorry.” Daniel said, “Not quite used to driving this thing yet.”

“That’s okay.” Marigold said easily. “I can’t drive at all so you’re already impressing me.”

Daniel smiled to himself as he continued driving more towards the centre of town. Marigold hummed softly and tucked the flower behind her ear, pulling down the sun visor to look in the small mirror to make sure it was sitting nicely.

“It’s a gorgeous shade of yellow. Did you grow it yourself?” she asked, tapping the petals gently before shutting the visor again.

“No.” Daniel chuckled. “My mom did. I don’t…know a lot about gardening.”

“What a shame.” Marigold tisked. “I love it.”

Her eyes went wide as they turned into a parking lot and she gasped as she threw out her hand to touch his arm. Daniel was sure shivers tore down his spine at her simple touch and he glanced over at her in surprise.

“Are we going to Wendy’s?” she asked.

“Is that okay?” Daniel retorted quickly.

“Yes!” Marigold grinned, clapping her hands together a little in excitement. “Wendy’s is my favourite!”

Daniel let the truck drift to a stop in the drive-thru lineup and he looked over at her, “Really? It’s mine too.”

“Wow. We sit next to each other for three entire months and yet we are still learning about each other.”

“I mean we talk more about Shakespeare than fast food and flowers in class but…yeah.” Daniel chuckled.

Marigold smiled at him, the sweetest giggle falling from her lips, and the dim lights from the restaurant sign and almost setting sun outside the windows cast a pretty yellow glow across her face. Daniel was sure he had never seen anything or anyone as beautiful.

She told him her order and he paid at the window and passed her the takeout bag to hold as he pulled out of the drive-thru. Marigold peeked open the bag and snuck a fry for herself before taking a second and holding it out in front of Daniel’s nose. He smiled shyly and leaned in to let her feed it to him as he drove. She folded up the top of the takeout bag and let her gaze drift out the window as they headed towards the outskirts of town.

“Where are you taking me?” she asked.

“You’ll see.” Daniel answered casually.

Marigold glanced over at him as he was focused on the road and she let a small smile come to her lips. He had this seriousness about him when he drove, or maybe that was just his first date jitters taking over, as his bottom lip stayed wedged between his teeth and his hands stayed wrapped around the steering wheel. He took them out of the suburbs and into the outskirts of town where the buildings moulded into farmland and the street lamps turned into rickety telephone wires. Daniel - who only had his license for a few months - drove extra cautiously as pavement turned into dirt roads. The sun was still just over the horizon but was dropping quickly and the hues of sunset were fluttering through the truck and across their faces.

Daniel finally pulled into an alcove at the side of the road, down a slightly narrow dirt path that somewhat resembled someone’s driveway. Marigold simply held their takeout bag on her lap and trusted his process. He did a slightly rusty three-point-turn to reverse at the end of the path and then parked.

“Where are we?” Marigold asked with a slightly nervous giggle.

“Come.” Daniel opened the door and hopped out onto the dirt below. Marigold followed him around the truck with the takeout bag and he opened the back to reveal the bed of the truck made up with blankets and pillows.

Marigold bit back her smile and turned over her shoulder to the vast expanse of farmland beyond and a perfect view of the sunset and the outskirts of the city in the distance.

“Is it stupid? You can tell me.” Daniel said quickly.

“No.” she answered right away. “I really love this.”

“Good because my other option was bowling and I really suck at bowling.” Daniel sighed.

Marigold laughed sweetly and climbed up into the back of the truck. He followed quickly and they got the pillows arranged to rest back on with the blankets under them to prevent the hard plastic of the truck bed from becoming too uncomfortable. They split their food and ate on their laps while watching the sunset. Daniel was almost too nervous to eat - he felt like he might be sick any moment - but he ate anyway and focused on the soft humming coming from the pretty blonde girl beside him.

“How’d you find this spot?” Marigold finally asked.

“By chance, honestly.” Daniel shrugged. “I was practicing my driving before I got my full license and I was up around here and pulled over to answer a call from my mom and...I dunno...it looked kinda nice.”

Marigold nodded in agreement through a bite of her burger before answering, “It is kinda nice.”

“You’re the first person I’ve taken here.”

“Oh really?” Marigold smiled over at him, “I’m glad. Maybe this can be our spot.”

Daniel bit his lip to prevent himself from smiling as wide as he possibly could back at her and he nodded, “Okay.”

They finished their meals in near silence and by the time the sun finally dipped below the horizon and sent the land into near darkness, they rested back against the pillows comfortably. Daniel pulled up one of the blankets over their laps to keep warm as night fell and the temperature started to drop. Marigold was entranced by the views, her gaze unwavering as she stared up at the stars starting to appear across the inky sky.

“You can never see the stars from town.” she whispered.

Daniel looked from her up to the sky himself and smiled lightly at the blinking stars staring back at them.

“They’re so pretty.” Marigold said.

He looked back over at her, certainly finding her much prettier than the stars. He couldn’t believe she was really truly there with him - after months of psyching himself out and putting it off. She was the prettiest girl in the whole school, Daniel was sure of it, not to mention the sweetest and thinking about the fact that she so easily agreed to go out with him made his heart jump in his chest.

As if reading his thoughts, she asked, “Why’d you want to ask me out?”

Daniel was startled by her question and when he didn’t answer right away she looked back at him expectantly.

“I...You...were the prettiest girl I’d ever seen when you walked into the classroom at the start of term and...so nice to me and so...sweet and...I’ve had a serious crush on you for weeks now but I was too scared to ever do anything about it.”

Marigold lolled her head back against the rear window of the truck and listened so intently to him that you’d think he was preaching the gospel.

“So why now?” she challenged.

“Truth?” Daniel asked.

She nodded.

“My friends said if I didn’t ask you out by the end of the week, they’d do it for me and I don’t think I could ever recover from that embarrassment if they did.”

“Ah, so you waited for the eleventh hour?” Marigold giggled.

“Yeah.” Daniel laughed lightly, looking back down to his lap where he was picking nervously at the loose threads on the blanket draped over them.

Marigold spoke quietly to him, her eyes focused on his face even when he wasn’t looking back at her, “Well you know I’m not shy by any means but...I kinda always got a little nervous around you.”

Daniel finally looked back at her, “What? Really?”

She bit her smiling lip and nodded, “I kinda had a serious crush on you too. I’d get all nervous before first period because I knew I’d be seeing you.”

“Shut up. You did not.” Daniel blushed, looking away from her shyly.

“I did. I did, I swear.” Marigold giggled. “You were just so cute and quiet and made me feel like a little kid all shy.”

“You shoulda told me.” Daniel mumbled, his cheeks flushed pink.

Marigold nudged him, “You shoulda told me.”

They looked back out to the stars, smiling to themselves quietly at the confessions of the other. By the light of the stars, Marigold slid her hand out and brushed over his wrist ever so gently. His eyebrows furrowed a moment in confusion and turned his left hand out palm up as if expecting her to pass him something but all she did was slide her fingers into his and held his hand. Daniel kept his eyes on the sky but gladly kept a snug grip on her hand, ignoring the sickening sweet butterflies that flew around in his stomach.

“My mom says I can get too friendly sometimes so if I cross a line just tell me.” Marigold said.

“You’re fine.” Daniel assured her with a whisper.

She shuffled closer and leaned her head on his shoulder and he swore the feeling of her so close had the most blissful warmth radiating throughout his whole body. He gently rubbed his thumb over hers and she gave his hand a squeeze. Is this what heaven felt like? Daniel never wanted to leave. Just to sit forever just them and the stars.

They sat just like that for a while, sharing whispered conversations about home and their families and their favourite movies. Even when their palms got a little clammy as the minutes moulded into hours, they didn’t move from their spot.

Their spot.

Curfew approached faster than they would have liked to admit and Daniel turned to look at her in their close proximity. Their noses touched as she was still leaned up into his side but she just brushed hers over his and they shared little shy giggles. He could have kissed her right then and there. The stars sparkled in her light blue eyes and he could feel the warmth of her body against his and she was staring at him like she wanted him to.

Daniel shifted slowly and dusted a kiss over her cheek instead before slipping his hand out of hers, “We should head back.”

His shyness made her smile and she let her gaze linger on him a moment longer as he gathered their empty takeout bag and shifted the blanket off of their laps. Daniel never often noticed the way she stared at him when he wasn’t paying attention, always with that same soft smile and adoring light eyes, ever since that very night of their very first date.

Daniel mentally beat himself up the entire drive back into town for not kissing her. The opportunity was right there and he chickened out. As they pulled into Marigold’s driveway, he told himself he was going to kiss her and end the date as it should end. He parked and took a deep breath before looking over at her.

“Thank you for tonight.” Marigold smiled. “I had fun.”

“You’re welcome.” Daniel replied quickly.

“Dinner was great...the stars...everything...it was incredible.”

Daniel only nodded, trying to find that perfect beat of silence so he could go for it but Marigold wasn’t really one to ever stop talking.

“I haven’t really been on dates before...but this one was certainly my favourite. Even the flower. Especially the flower.” she touched the yellow marigold that was still tucked behind her ear before grabbing her small purse and opened the door.

“I’ll walk you up.” Daniel said hurriedly and jumped out of the truck with her.

He stuffed his hands in the pockets of his pants as they headed up the front steps and she smiled widely at him.

“What a gentleman.” she complimented, a hint of teasing in her tone just to make him blush.

She reached for the door handle but turned back to him almost expectantly. Daniel almost went for it but she spoke again.

“So...are we dating then?”

Her question took Daniel by surprise but she smiled sweetly at him as she waited for his answer.

He licked his lips nervously but nodded, “Yeah. I’d...I’d like that.”

“Daniel, will you be my boyfriend?”

“I’m supposed to ask you!”

“You asked me on the date so it’s only fair I can ask you to date me.”

“That’s...that’s not...Marigold, will you be my girlfriend?”

“Only if you agree to be my boyfriend.”

“You’re so stubborn, oh my gosh.” Daniel laughed nervously.

“Is that a yes?”

“Yeah, obviously.”

“Yeah, obviously.” Marigold giggled, using his words as her reply too, their momentary banter falling into silence.

This was the moment.

Daniel stepped closer to her and leaned down slightly, sliding his hand to the side of her neck and gently tilted her head up towards him. They were only a mere inch apart before the front door was tugged open and Marigold, who still had her hand on the handle, went stumbling backwards with a gasp.

“Mari!”

Marigold turned to her younger sister with a huff, “What, Iris? What is it?”

The blonde girl in the doorway - who looked a heck of a lot like Marigold apart from her slightly darker blonde hair and much greener eyes - continued loudly, “Do you know where my purple skirt is? I need it for this weekend!”

“You couldn’t have waited two more minutes for me to come inside?” Marigold scolded lightly.

Daniel shifted shyly on his feet and kept his hands in his pockets as she reprimanded her little sister.

“Hey,” the younger teenager looked past her to Daniel, “Aren’t you Anna Seavey’s brother?”

Daniel nodded stiffly, “Yeah.”

“Jesus! She’s like the coolest freshman in the entire school. Mari, are you dating Anna’s brother?!”

“Iris! You’re being rude. And don’t say Jesus.”

“Okay, but have you seen my skirt? Can you help me find it?”

Daniel chuckled at Marigold’s obviously unimpressed expression but she sighed in defeat, always too nice for her own good.

“Fine. I’m coming.” Marigold looked back to Daniel, “Sorry.”

He waved his hand between them casually, “Nah, it’s fine.”

“I’ll see you on Monday.” she smiled. “Thanks again for tonight.”

Daniel nodded and watched her be pulled inside by her fourteen-year-old sister. He lingered on her front porch for a moment before exhaling deeply and running his hands through his hair. Merely a few hours before he was pathetically pining over this girl from his english class and suddenly, by nightfall, he was her boyfriend.

Daniel drove home in his hand-me-down pickup truck that lingered with the scent of her floral drugstore perfume. No junior would ever say this, but he couldn’t wait until Monday.

[localdadfriend]

Tag game: 50 Qs

Tagged by @hartigays forever ago and I forgot about it in my drafts lol

1. what is the color of your hairbrush? I don't actually brush my hair... but the brush in my bathroom is a wooden boar bristle one.

2. name a food you never eat: Sushi

3. are you typically too warm or too cold? I'm always cold. I run hot so my heat is always escaping me.

4. what were you doing 45 mins ago?  Reading a fic

5. what’s your favorite candy bar? I'm not really a candy person. But I like chocolate and caramel together.

6. have you ever been to a professional sports game? uhh nope.

7. what is the last thing you said out loud? “Fuck"

8. what is your favorite ice cream? Mint chocolate chip

9. what was the last thing you had to drink? Soda

10. do you like your wallet? Yeah. It's black leather and I painted Anarchy shit on it

11. what is the last thing you ate? My momma's pasta and sauce

12. did you buy any new clothes last weekend? Nope. I'm trying to cut down.

13. what’s the last sporting event you watched?  I never watch sports tbh.

13. what is your favorite flavor of popcorn? I hate popcorn lmao

14. who is the last person you sent a text message to? My mom

15. ever been camping? only once or twice

16. do you take vitamins? sometimes

17. do you regularly attend a place of worship? if the forest counts then yes.

18. do you have a tan? Yeah, from Cali. But it's fading and I'm sad..

19. do you prefer chinese food or pizza? I only like Chinese food from this one place I've been going to since I was a kid. So pizza?

20. do you drink your soda through a straw? only when I go to restaurants or fast food places

21. what color socks do you usually wear? Uh usually black but lately I wear my green wool mountain socks!

22. do you ever drive above the speed limit? Wtf is a speed limit? I thought those things were suggestions.

23. what terrifies you? My loved ones dying.

24. look to your left, what do you see? A T.V

25. what chore do you hate most? I don't have chores lol I mean like... general necessities putting groceries away always annoys me for some reason.

26. what do you think of when you hear an australian accent? Sexy... but also Jay (one of my headmates)

27. what’s your favorite soda? Mt. Dew

28. do you go in a fast food place or just hit the drive thru? Drive thru... duh.

29. what’s your favorite number? 23

30. who’s the last person you talked to? My mom (I'm a momma's boy if you haven't noticed)

31. favorite cut of beef? T-bone 🐺👅💦

32. last song you listened to? hmm I don't remember. Something on my sleep playlist on Spotify

33. last book you read? haha! I don't read books, nerd. Only fanfics.

34. favorite day of the week? I mean they're all the same tbh 🤷🏼‍♂️

35. can you say the alphabet backwards? Yeah right!

36. how do you like your coffee? Not a coffee person.

37. favorite pair of shoes? My combats

38. time you normally get up? Uhh currently, between 9am and 11am

39. what do you prefer, sunrise or sunsets? Sunsets. But both really. I just hate being tired in the am to see the sunrise.

40. how many blankets on your bed? currently 3. My heating blanket, my quilt and my duvet.

41. describe your kitchen plates. Plain white ceramic.

42. describe your kitchen at the moment. Slightly cluttered from all the cooking I did yesterday for the Halloween party. But cozy cause we have all the winter throws on the couches and pillows.

43. do you have a favorite alcoholic drink? Almost anything with Vodka in it. But there green tea shots and these sweedish fish shot from my local gay club are BOMB!

44. do you play cards? Yep

45. what color is your car? White

47. can you change a tire? Technically, theoretically, but I haven't had to actually do it yet so I don't knkw LMAO!

48. your favorite country? Uh... Italy or Scotland

49. favorite job you’ve had? Florist

Tagging: @pretty-bratty @prettyboyporter @harringrovetrashh @daggers---drawn @hoegrove @catharrington @memes-saved-me (sorry if you've already been tagged)

[justanalto]

i was tagged by the wonderfully sweet @besidemethewholedamntime -- thank you so much!! <3 <3 <3

1. What is the color of your hairbrush?

I have a wet brush that’s bright blue, but I also have a hairbrush that’s red!

2. Name a food you never eat

uhhhh...olives, but only when they’re on their own. 

3. Are you typical too warm or too cold?

I’m always too cold. always, always, always. my fingers are currently freezing and so are my toes. I think it’s because there’s a loose draft in my room here somewhere, TBH. 

4. What were you doing 45 minutes ago?

roses are red // 45 minutes ago // i was writing poetry // and answering all my asks in a row

i’ve been sending people asks in poetry form and they’ve been responding, LOL -- so there’s been a lot of poetry brain going on!

5. What’s your favorite candy bar?

either a nice dark chocolate bar or a green tea kit kat bar!

6. Have you ever been to professional sports event?

I’ve been to a few professional baseball games! gotta get out there and have some mass sports pride. one of these days, my american football team will be good again and I will get those tickets. 

7. What is the last thing you said out loud?

some half-hearted mumble-harmonizing to pentatonix’s be my eyes, so something along those lyrics!

8. What is your favorite ice cream?

either black raspberry (s/o to campus!!) or mint chocolate chip :) 

9. What was the last thing you had to drink?

a couple of sips of water, hehe

10. Do you like your wallet?

I do! It’s the first “grown-up” wallet I feel like I’ve ever had -- I bought it from camden market last year when I was in london, and it’s a nice pine shade of green and made of cork. unfortunately, because i bought it in london, it also means that it doesn’t hold american currency quite as well, but it’s okay, i make do, LOL! 

11. What is the last thing you ate?

my dad made spaghetti bolognese and I ate that with a hecking ton of bread. it was fantastic :) 

12. Did you buy any new clothes last weekend?

unfortunately, no :( i can’t remember the last time I bought new clothes. maybe january? february? before the pandemic started. 

13. What’s the last sporting event you watched?

I think...I know it was definitely a pats game, and I’m pretty sure we lost, so it’s somewhere along the lines of pats v. ravens, I think

14. What is your favorite flavor of popcorn?

extra buttery, even though it would probably murder me :’)

15. Who is the last person you send text message to?

@aleksandrachaev, and it was two thumbs-up emojis, LOL. 

16. Ever been camping?

I have! I went a long time ago, like nine years ago long ago, I think somewhere out west? I slept on an air mattress, went to an outdoor bathroom, all that fun jazz! and the bug bites, LOL. 

17. Do you take vitamins?

my mom: so you’ve got the probiotic, the vitamin c and the biotin...

18. Do you regularly attend a place of workship?

I don’t -- my dad used to go to church regularly, but other than that, I’ve never been to church and we’ve never been as a family. 

19. Do you have a tan?

i don’t know how this happened but I literally still have shorts tan from like, august. it is the middle of november, someone tell me how I got here. a couple of years ago, I burnt so badly on a trip to LA I was still seeing the tan months later, LOL. and most of the time, I have some fair flip-flop tan!

20. Do you prefer chinese or pizza?

chinese, because pizza has the ability to murder me

21. Do you drink your soda through a straw?

it it’s a takeout cup, then odds are good i’m drinking it through a straw, but other than that nope :) 

22. What color socks you usually wear?

white or grey, I think? i have some funky colored ones but i’m trying to change that

23. Do you ever drive above the speed limit?

i’m having flashbacks to a conversation I had with a friend who laughed at me for going five miles above the speed limit -- yes, I do, but only the allowed five miles above the speed limit and none more

24. What terrifies you?

oh, no, you don’t want to ask me that, we’d be here all day...being abandoned, I guess? being left by the people I care about, becoming too attached to people because they can leave and hurt me, spiders, heights, the pandemic, being hated, being alone...my own emotions, sometimes. 

25. Look to your left, what do you see?

my tubby nugget! he smiles at me, and I feel a lil better :)

26. What chore do you hate the most?

i literally could not tell you how much I hate cleaning the grout in our bathroom tile. it is a CHORE. 

27. What do you think when you hear Australian accent?

the hemsworth brothers, but also someone I met abroad who was from perth and had the same name as me, LOL

28. Whats your favorite soda?

ginger ale! 

29. Do you go in a fast food place or just hit drive through?

depends on where I’m hitting, tbh -- if i’m in a hurry, we’re going straight through the drive-thru. but if it’s an event, then we’ll go in! have a fun time. sit for a while and talk. 

30. What’s your favorite number?

i don’t think I have one, actually?

31. Who’s the last person you talked to?

my dad, I’m pretty sure -- we talked about pandemic unemployment assistance :)

32. Favorite meal?

sushi, or whenever my mom makes steamed chicken. (i’m realizing it’s been so long since I’ve had that chicken and now I’m sad) 

33. Last song you listed to?

for real by lana condor

34. Last book you read?

confucius jane by katie lynch, just to see if the lesbians stood up to the pedestal i’d put them on -- and hell yeah, they did! 

35. Favorite day of the week?

right now, thursdays, because thursday is grey’s day! 

36. Can you say alphabet backwards?

probably, if you gave me enough time to think about it

37. How do you like your coffee?

like i like my men -- from afar, some of them are pretty, but do I actually like them? no

38. Favorite pair of shoes?

either my gray ankle boots I got a couple of years ago or my ‘gay lesbian snow boots’ that I use when it’s snowing something awful out, LOL!

39. Time you normally get up?

i’m supposed to be up at 8 am, but I’m usually up anywhere between 9 and 10am. I...need to change that, LOL. 

40. What do you prefer, sunrise or sunset?

i love both! but I like sunset because I’ve never specifically woken up to see the sunrise, i’ve only seen it out of coincidence because I pulled an all nighter to do work

41. How many blankets on your bed?

three, at the moment -- a costco blanket, my college blanket and a five-below blanket

42. Describe your kitchen plates.

white with a floral border

43. Describe your kitchen at the moment.

it’s lived-in -- we have a side table that’s always at the risk of a collapsing, a power strip that runs a kettle, microwave and toaster oven (you can never run two of them at once otherwise the strip shuts off), kitchen mats that will never get rid of their crumbs and a healthy, healthy pantry!

44. Do you have a favorite alcoholic drink?

either pink moscato wine or a rekorderlig cider! 

45. Do you play cards?

i used to a lot, when I was younger! when I got older I stopped finding people to be able to play them with, unfortunately. 

46. What color is your car?

silver! (even though I share it with my sister)

47. Can you change a tire?

no, but I’d definitely like to learn :)

48. Your favorite state or province?

new york or california, honestly. probably california. it’s the place I’ve felt the most free :) 

49. Favorite job you’ve had?

i’ve had a lot of internships but not a lot of jobs, but I’d probably have to say it was the one I had at dunks -- so many funny things and stories came out of it, and now I have enough barista experience to power my coffee shop fics for a lifetime! 

tagging: @agentmmayy @nazezdha321 @sadtunes @a-biochemist-not-a-bird @browneyedgenius @daisylincs @aleksandrachaev @missinglittlebritishfriend @hannahxowen @genderfluid-and-confuzled and anyone else that I missed -- you’re it!! (i’m truly sorry if I forgot you, I haven’t slept a lot in the last couple of nights fhdskjfhs) 

[morebedsidebooks]

LGBTQ+ Characters in Comics from the 20th century I like

It’s June, Pride is here and rainbow colours are everywhere. So, I figured I’d be a little retrospective and share a short list of LGBTQ+ characters in comics from the 20th century I have a soft spot for. I’ve organized these by date of the characters first appearing but, happily most are still having stories written about them today.

Let’s start with three ladies from DC: 

Catwoman

Catwoman, specifically Selina Kyle has been around comics for a long time, nearly as long as the turbulence of her relationship with Batman. Though, Bruce isn’t they only character she has involved herself with over the years. I’ve got my share of comics featuring this fierce lady of many lives and antiheroine, including part of the New 52 run by Genevieve Valentine a few years back where her bisexuality was acknowledged as canon. Though, it was the film adaptation Batman Returns in 1992 with Michelle Pfieffer that blew me away when I was young. And remains, I think the most iconic Catwoman costume, which you can see in 4K now. Hear her roar.

Wonder Woman

Wonder Woman is another longstanding character and probably the most popular female superhero. I had comics as a child with Diana along with watching the sometimes campy 1970s TV series with Lynda Carter. Perhaps even more interesting than the Amazonian warrior herself is the passions of one of her creators William Marston and the themes of those earliest comics. (I’d suggest the book Wonder Woman: Bondage and Feminism in the Marston/Peters Comics 1941-1948.) And of course, also the controversy over a strong heroine standing on her own sparked by Fredic Wertham in Seduction of the Innocent.

Poison Ivy

Poison Ivy, or Pamela Isely with her sexual agency and connection to the Green, who admittedly may go about fighting for the environment as well as for women or children in the wrong way sometimes, is my top female character from American comics period. After again some rough treatment in comics recently, I wrote this year about her origins since 1966. Most people these days probably can’t think of Ivy without Harley, since it’s been 20 years since their first meeting in comics (longer for other mediums) but, these gals have a relationship that isn’t monogamous and has had it’s on again off again points too. (And note to DC maybe get it together on just how you define it since you waffle a bit hmm?)

 Taku and Venomm

Black Panther was one of the few Marvel comics characters whose stories I’ve wound up reading. (My mum had this thing against some comics and one of my older brothers mainly passed on DC issues to me.) The Jungle Action installments written by Don McGregor are to this day still memorable. And part of that should be due also to Taku and Venomm (Horatio Walters), the latter first appearing in the “Panther’s Rage” arc. Though, it would take time for the open acknowledgement of this example of early gay characters in comics. Sexuality outside the heterosexual among other topics was taboo in the 1970s yet, McGregor managed with a collection of artists to bring a vision of Wakanda focusing largely on its black inhabitants and difficult social issues in the world to publication.

 Juli Bauernfeind

I read The Heart of Thomas by Moto Hagio about boys at a German boarding school when I was 21. Juli was a character I connected to and the story had a profound effect on me. And I bawled my eyes out. It still makes me cry and is still one of the best comics I’ve ever come across. I reviewed the English edition a few years back. As well as wrote a post on the French bisexual author Roger Peyrefitte whose novel was adapted into a film which inspired Hagio.

 John Constantine

Full of politics, call it dark with a dose of nihilism but, Hellblazer with John Constantine is just damn good. Sometimes the world is awful, people are awful, you’re awful and well yeah everything is going to hell. Constantine is pretty much dreadful for the women he’s often involved with, or well anybody really. It was in the early 90s readers were first clued into the history of his love life made up of girlfriends and boyfriends. And can we fail to recall the later S. W. Manor from Ashes & Dust: In the City of Angels, one of the most visceral takes thru a character that is basically a stand in for Bruce Wayne, and his twisted relationship with John? I’m not. It’s been a strange trip over the years some adaptations really glossing over his sexuality. Though of late handling this aspect of his character appears to have gotten better.

 Stormer and Kimber 

The madcap Jem and the Holograms was one of my favourite cartoons as a child in the 80s. I even had some of the dolls and cassette tapes. Stormer aka Mary Phillips part of the Misfits was the rock star I loved the most. Dedicated to music and actually quite sweet with the optimum blue hair. I had to try the colour myself. The episode where she teams up with Kimber after both have differences with their respective bandmates is a classic. So, it was truly outrageous when the series was revived in 2015 in comic book form by Kelly Thompson and Sophie Campbell, and the Stormer and Kimber relationship that had been brewing came fully out for fans. (Btw the comic also added a new character, Blaze who is a trans woman and girlfriend of Misfit’s fan Clash.)

  Ash Lynx and Eiji Okamura

It’s been interesting to experience Banana Fish by Akimi Yoshida in different ways from first encountering the comic when I was a teenager, picking it up again in my twenties, and yet again the animated TV series last year. I wrote about the comic and first few episodes of the 2018 adaptation when it was airing. Though, I haven’t posted much more on it because there’s a tiny percentage of its fandom I want to avoid, as well as 30+ years on the series is still— pain. This one is a tragedy folks. However, it also has a beautiful healing love story and touched on a variety of hot button issues that are sadly still relevant today. My love for these two teen characters in a gritty USA will live forever.

  Chihaya and Kagetsuya

I’ve written before how the sci-fi title Earthian was what introduced and endeared respect for m/m comics from Japan for me. The art style of Yun Kouga has changed a bit over the years, nevertheless still stands out from the crowd. And Earthian with a taboo love between androgynous male angels remains my favourite of her work.

Michiru Kaiô and Haruka Tennô

Sailor Moon has become a multimedia sensation and is beloved around the world. Many kids and even adults of all sorts in the 90s will remember it in one form or another and cite it as an influence for pursuing careers in all sorts of creative fields. Along with countless fans recognizing or discovering something of themselves in the characters. There are several different characters for rep in the series. But particularly for me Michiru and Haruka were an opportunity in a very anti-LGBTQ+ climate (their relationship was even refashioned as being cousins when brought out in English for the first time) to nevertheless see such a loving, positive relationship.

Tomoyo Daidôji

Love is a theme the creative team CLAMP revisits and revisits and Cardcaptor Sakura is the magical girl comic series with a theme on all different forms. It is one of the first all ages titles from Japan that I will recommend to people. (Despite fyi containing a whopping four student-teacher relationships. Not the purpose of this post to go into right now though.) The best friend to Sakura, Tomoyo is one of my favourite characters. Always supportive, maybe a bit alarming popping out of bushes or other spots with her camera at the ready to catch either Sakura’s everyday life or battles, and possessing boundless fashion sense. (Btw, there are other characters in the series that are or could be interpreted as examples for my list as well. Sakura among them.)

  Isabella Yamamoto

Paradise Kiss by Ai Yazawa, a sequel of sorts to one of the huge girls’ comics titles of the 1990s Gokinjo Monogatari, introduced a group of teenagers on the verge of graduating, some with an idea of what to do with their lives and others questioning the path they’ve so far taken. Isabella from an affluent background but, who struggled for acceptance from her family or nearly anyone until she was gifted a handmade dress by her childhood friend George (who is Bi btw), studies pattern drafting at the same art school as Gokinjo Monogatari. The most mature of the main cast, refined, always listening and offering a cup of tea, she achieves her dream career and self-actualization in fashion. Since I have a degree in fashion design, I have to agree that clothes are so much more than just something we wear.

[thisisabouta]

This is About a... Downfall.

It’s happening. I’ve been taking Lamotrigine consistently for 8 months or so. Maybe longer. This is the longest i’ve consistently taken medication in a long time. It’s Lamotrigine along with Doxepin, Hydroxyzine and Gabapentin.

This is where my head has been during these last 8 or so months. I was driving on the freeway, about to merge and as I saw my car getting closer to the concrete barrier, I decided to go faster instead of slowing down for the car that had the right a way. I was about to crash into the side of this fucking car but I just kept going. The car to my right had to slam their brakes and I waited to hear the loud crash from the cars behind them because there was no way this wasn’t about to be a 5 car pile up.

God was there because nothing happened but that was way too fucking close to a catastrophe. The car that I cut off trailed me for awhile and pulled up next to me, I’m sure they were trying to cuss me out, flip me off, something... Whatever they did, I didn’t see it but it was justified. I would’ve been fucking heated if it had been the other way around. I cut people off all the time. I drive like an asshole, whatever. This was different.

I’ve been disassociating for weeks now. In that moment, I could see everything that was happening but my brain was not telling my body the correct way to react. I knew to slow down but I couldn’t. Everything i’ve been doing lately has had a delay. 1 minute. 5 minute. 10 minutes. My processing is delayed. My speech stumbles out of my mouth and doesn’t make sense. I’ve been blacking out and losing moments of time for years now but not to this severity. Now it’s like i’m blacking out and not fully coming back from it.

I’m around people constantly. I’m in a position of “leadership” at work so I have to direct and plan, be on alert at all times. My work day now consists of getting asked questions that I can’t comprehend fast enough so I stand there with a blank stare on my face, slowly losing my credibility. It’s worse because some of the things i’m being asked, I absolutely know the answer to but my brain just cannot get there. I can’t focus on ANYTHING. I know i’m walking around in circles (literally) and I know other people see it but I can’t stop. This circling shit happens a lot but it’s picked up in frequency. After I realize what i’m doing, it’s already done. People are trying to get my input and ideas and all I can do is squeeze my hands together and stare straight ahead, hoping my brain will figure out that I need it to work.

When I try to read, I can’t. This isn’t all the time but it happening occasionally is already too much. Words are not always making sense to me. I cant understand what i’m seeing and I have to go over things multiple times. It’s the same with counting. I shouldn’t have to use a calculator to add 30 and 20 or hold five $5 bills in front of me and stare at them until I realize what it is that i’m looking at. It’s embarrassing to even acknowledge that this is happening.

I’ve been losing things more and more everyday. I’ve had a habit of losing my keys. I lost my work keys at my last job, three times. My new job, i’ve already lost my keys once and it hasn’t even been 2 months that i’ve been working there. When my coworker texted me telling me that she found them, I just wanted to cry. That sounds ridiculous but having those keys is a huge fucking responsibility. I can get fired for losing them. Somehow I escaped that at my last job but it was a constant fear that I had. This last time, I hadn’t used the keys at all that day and I still managed to lose them. I retraced my steps and I had not taken them off of my keychain. Things like that don’t help me overcome this engrained idea I have that the universe is against me. Those keys represent me trying to do everything I can to keep it together while everything still managing to fall apart.

I’ve been forgetting to pay bills that i’ve been paying on the same day, every month for years. I’ve been forgetting people’s names. I can’t always comprehend what people are saying when they’re talking to me... that’s been a big one. I had a customer walk to my register at work. I was looking down at something when he asked if he could pay for his merchandise (I found out later on). That’s not what I heard. It came out as mumbling so I just assumed he was making a comment about something that was left on the counter. From what I remember, I said “Oh... yeah...” and went back to what I was doing. He looked at the Associate next to me and she told him that there were registers at the front where he could pay (she was already helping someone). He walked to the front and it took me about 2 or 3 minutes to realize that he was asking if I could ring him up. And to add to that awesome moment, he glared at me for the rest of the time he was in the fucking store. Yes, one small incident but that’s nowhere near how many times something like that has happened. Someone will be talking to me and i’m literally catching about every third word they’re saying. You can only ask “what?” so many times before that person looks at you like you’re the dumbest person they’ve ever met.

Writing things down... i’ll go back and read over my notes. They make no sense. Things are spelled incorrectly. Everything���s scattered. Like someone else wrote it. I walk around feeling like i’m not apart of my surroundings. My surroundings are not reality, like walking through a Fun House with no fun in sight. It’s like i’m seeing everything in those mirrors that make everything look distorted. All I can do is stare and try to figure it out. I can only imagine what that looks like from the outside. People walking around me while I just stare. Standing there trying not to cry because i’m in public.

I’ve been hallucinating. That comes and goes. I’m still forgetting why I picked certain things up, or why I walked to a certain room or what I was going to tell someone. Things a lot of people do but usually with somewhat immediate recall. I’m not remembering these things til days later, if at all. That’s the more frustrating part. Very small, seemingly insignificant things are happening over and over and over again. It’s no longer an insignificant mishap, this shit is snowballing and affecting everything. I can’t manage a store if I can’t function like a normal, fucking human being. I talked to my Probation Officer about some of the things that were happening and she asked me what medications I was taking and if any of them were used to treat seizures. Gave her the list and two of them just so happen to be used to treat seizures. I already knew that was the case but didn’t think that they would cause this long, intense stream of side effects. I know all about the side effects of medicine. You’ll basically die if you take it and die if you don’t.

I’ve experienced the lighter ones. Nausea, dizziness, dry mouth. The usual shit. Not forgetting how to read a fucking sentence. To my POs knowledge, those drugs do cause a lot of neurological problems, much that make it feel like i’m disassociating. Most of these things had been happening prior to taking the medications but it got much worse over time. I read up on the side effects in detail when I got home and everything aligned. So [because I will control this situation as much as I possibly can] I stopped taking the two that were the main issue. Should anyone ever just stop taking their medicine without consulting their physician first? No. Did I do it anyway? Yes. Now i’m going thru the withdrawal. Besides me losing my fucking mind, the Lamotrigine was actually working. It was the first medication I had taken for my Bipolar that has ever had that positive of an effect on me. But that was at the expense of me literally going insane. It’s not going to matter if I feel better when i’m dead because I crashed my car into a wall. The risk does not outweigh the reward. It did not cure anything. It did not solve even half of my problems but it did make me feel better. Not taking the Gabapentin doesn’t make a difference.

Now i’m going thru the withdrawal. I have 11 drafts on here that i’ve tried to complete and publish over the past few months and they’re just sitting in there. I know the only reason i’m able to write this one is because i’m not on the meds right now. Now my heart hasn’t felt off beat for the past few days (that’s a difficult feeling to describe) but in return, i’m the angriest i’ve been in awhile. I got in an argument with one of my employees this morning and did not feel bad at all. I got into it with another ASM a few days ago. I feel my temper coming back.

I made an appointment with a new MD for next week. I need to start over. I made an appointment to see my current Psychiatrist and cancelled it. I’m done with that guy. He keeps throwing these random pills at me and it’s not working. Not that the next doctor isn’t going to do the same, exact thing but I made an appointment at a facility that offers “Advanced Integrative Medical Care”. Basically, they’re on some new age shit. I’ve been reading up on Ketamine Therapy for over a year and even though it scares the shit out of me, i’m not completely against the idea. They also offer Medical Marijuana. I am officially now in my last 3 month stretch of my house arrest and this shit has finally gotten difficult. The first few weeks were hard because I was still trying to figure out what I could get away with and apparently it’s a lot but now, I just need this shit to end. I’m getting restless. I’m scared too tho.

I’m still going to be on supervised probation for a year (based on good behavior) but I need to get back to... something. I can’t be sober and I don’t want to be. Weed has been fine. Good, enough. I’ve grown a liking to it and found some that actually relaxes me. Alcohol. I miss alcohol. I’ll forever miss alcohol. I’ll miss it even if (when) I start drinking again. It’s that important. Watching movies, seeing people drink to have fun, to relax, to be brave, to socialize. And yet, I shouldn’t engage in that. I know I can engage in good things but the drinking is what i’ve been told I should stay away from. I’m not going to stay away from it. Alcohol makes things better. I know it, the people who tell me not to drink know it. It’s there and I need it. Yes, the problem is that I abuse it. I don’t know if I can overcome that problem. I’m going to try. That sounds crazy and insane so... it’s just going to have to be crazy and insane.

There are other ways to deal with my problems and i’m trying to implement them and hang onto them. I need those things too but I can’t walk thru the world with this open wound that is my life, unarmed. Chemicals... drugs... my brain chemistry will never be right and if I know there’s something out there that will give me temporary relief, i’m taking it. I just have to put the recklessness aside. This time around was a lot. I pray that it was enough to set me straight. Or at least to keep me out of jail for the second time.

[silkhuikj]

silk

Silk

by Hui Kj 

****************************

Bailey, 

Not the twins or fish rot find faces, and I did not know exactly until after your submarine redirected their mirror lipstick, which is hardly possible to get the subjects more gleeful until your Atlantis: where identity is scanned by [redacted] and your group will be occupying in the sea training, all your ladies from your power shedding but please, for not much longer for such a way is different here now; you can come back to our home planet and your ladies will remember you as I have over such awhile.

For me, motel to motel: lights and backflip, scanning stress, heart rate normal but tried - and what I fear now is your capture and to see locked portals when you teleport into some planet’s virus that shows how you just refuse to be predictable and become hologram trickery, and friendly your way thru in disguise and that is my meaning to advise against your risk taking, besides the mere admiration I have: to avoid but of course promptly applaud on how you adapt across intimidating lines, and what I fear is that you have been brought here and there in your own way of time, yet by my traces shaping, and /Silk/’s gambling habits and you remain invisible one day at a time. Forget old-key monuments; not in this phase of life. 

/Silk/ with their gene, file pile separation operation for animal evolution, brain swapping and to sense-evolve: being able to see the scent in the lab: see thru fog - or hear their sigh as crickets choir to a song of freedom outside the bases on acre-vastness maybe noticed. See undo modern garden and me as fuck up then with the modern tree with extraction for our potions that remain classified, and I fuck up edit-copy-send and refuse to supply 100% of my own intel piles - there is a kingdom getting more difficult to fight for. 

Sometimes there are branches French kissing or cloud faces turning to see: all too addicting but they remain when I break eye contact and that is why we seek out identity because identity is everywhere if you hunt metaphysics or any bloom or trail. My curtains are closed now - and the powers are wearing off since I removed myself out of fear. 

A joke would be fireworks if we do not see each other but the cosmos specks are stories: the static riot and all the Rains, and all the Noahs, and all the Summers; shame for the tongue at the edge of worlds to wait on but deniable recruitment statuses, or a wise one does not have the knack or interest for our history and maybe even any history neither. You bite your tongue. If subject is at truth then it is ice cold when they are older yet you help them from the sea. Game but will title. So, when crazy B? 

/Silk/ is very serious about when green is black there is orange. If God knew of what you said that day then…..this is why I am alone and gave my office to our good pal Garcia who you teamed then but you were sent elsewhere because of the so many blueprints. He might of stole information like I did so, but he is an artist - I have not been back for almost a year, and I will not get current-tied; not again because you are already there and anywhere often but away. They remain a vision tilt opus all in all frequently, and that is /Silk/ while we can write these letters but somehow are separated by design tally planets away, mild difference with submarines, airplanes, or again classified means…(teleport), but you do not think that is true and your letters tell me that each person planted should envy each other and collectively better the world - /Silk/ is good but it all separates us. Jolie amour, I need to see you. /Silk/ is sending me someone - Godspeed. . .

- K.Well

***********************************

Bailey, 

Did /Silk/ call for a virtual huddle when the scan came thru? I do not know if heaven cheers or if the sky is the first to go dark - I am not in the system anymore. My den is poison-lights straining me with puzzle strings if void is nothing or everything lately. I meant something else about teacher-twins. [Filter]: sonder not bombers; they are not reporting on recruits from planet: Sneurnka: make sure /Silk/ knows different hums are different revivers and then learn it.. all subjects will be tested about planet flexibility and I will send spies on my own if I must. 

I love you Bailey. When you turn on Church Street out-under, do you crack from the suicide I have caused? The admirers… I am trying to preserve this for you from me, or just my depictions made some crazy when they were fine and it was misguided when the risk was absolute zero but was taken as contradiction. Garcia told you; so you can know my pain: weary agent uncurling. Me for earth - you at Atlantis - /Silk/ unknown: we want to save Sneurnka. Although, there is a raptured fever held and kept to a butterfly and your data fraction was saved and I have it here with me. (Reference: Garcia: code: Wolfman.) He sent me a letter about green suicide: not too far away from me now. It is someone - possibly an old subject, and I found him and invited him to coffee…. Ah, we need a double against old friends, find my chip; last buffered 492582 and even what did I Mrs. then? - in hiding for this. The subject will collapse in will offer up himself for the Sneurnka attack; the issue is all he knows is snow just pressed diction and fear for coming back - he is 30 minutes away. 

I will try spelling it out for him ad submerge lightning in honor of your sector with options for placement. My cup of tea is psychosis even though I remember how brave you were in training, even outlining the teacher’s alien drawings and it was impossible for you to not get promoted and promoted on. You helped me, and /Silk/ gave you that noble internship and when God showed your eyes were shut because one of the Noah’s turtles went blue; /Silk/ was zapped by God, and extraction is what I am trying to get to you but it is tangible unlike our computer army that I refuse to reopen those blueprints and be discovered  )))))))))))))))

((((((((((((((( Subject 1 brought his cousin to the cafe. She (2) told me to be sick six times. It made it seem that things were reserved for the last: they had cuts on their arms and around their body and even mentioned they would sometimes slice each other to feel - /Silk/ is interested because of their undeniably unique aesthetic with the moodiness, enigma spy, and they told me the uncommon fight is how glow is glow and I am guessing /Silk/ will offer these two help and if it is incest then many things could be of disturbance to the code and DNA of any of our bases. They just do many drugs; mostly meth for telepathy access. Denial they would throw pennies at me but you would be the cousin’s Queen. It is just their mayday. ))

— 

The subjects told me how their vibration is grey but remain investigating. My jaw dropped when they spoke of death wishes, and without hesitation I offered up a planet Sneurnka visitation. Their grey rain in a season and meeting destiny accidentally: subject 2 spoke up, I need /Silk/ to stay away from this kind of plotting: her filter exposes and forfeits progression 00000 doom but they will be away at Sneurnka to learn about spite, and you are the one I trust B - if you go there you could have your position changed: I know asking for more of your help is painful both ways, but new subjects contact me swiftly but urgently throughout my months data scanning. You could help these subjects, and you have dearly planted productivity at Atlantis. Your tracking will be up again once you arise. Thanks for all you do.  

K.Well

*******************************

Bailey,

Wolfman dimension Q swayed your findings and concerns for you to report to Sneurnka, even though your 7th sent me a direct postcard from London - thank you for writing my dear: I am jazzed even if everyone else just knows your badge. In your letter, I must say, you misplaced something: ‘cat9’ which the code has changed and now only means, ‘Virginia, Vegas fathers’ - which Wolfman has drafted your report so all in all to /Silk/; you have your clones pretty and handsome: bravery; as you are always and everyone fears you for ethics. 

Your dyed your hair black and your profile ‘Xxxx-00000’ is equivalent to the April trinity: tho all scanning winter, summer, spring, and still in progress. You always told me you just wanted to be normal, and I do not know if I can fix that: you bring peace and if you are tired of retire daydream then I will contact /Silk/ and see if they can give you a vacation in Z and electrify a twin to achieve points Sneurnka or not, and if you never see me again: it is because Wolfman said I was crazy and rebellious and evil for deactivating my will to get out - this matrix is a doorbell: but I am afraid the only nerves is that nobody will show. I have merged my clones for a greater cause  and /Silk/ is not only guarding you but slowly casting virus walls in my chips thru our line. Yet, you are the invisible one, and maybe you will frenzy to freedom without my help. 

Wolfman is dialing…)))))))))))))))))) 

((((((((((((((((((((( So,…. /Silk/ has found a C in America, Earth. so your 9 was correct: well done! Wolfman wanted me to tell you about this important art: XXXXXXX by XXXXXXX, and that was all. B, my eyes on you will stay to protect but I am no host. Turn around if you feel anxious, but I know that is wave oriented and you are so bold and infinitely inspiring. You said in your letter that Atlantis is in order. I will be scanning in Sneurnka for awhile while you train C - remember, Earth’s eye is violent but Sneurnka is worse - Wolfman will assist with……))))))))))))))))

(((((((((((((((( 

(

I cannot scan any finds; undetectable information walls - your parents are dialing my phone but my phone is under. Reading about the suicides - oh no B. I can not send anymore blueprints and there is no clearance for you to know about the Wvm-virus that slipped out from my lab…. - unplugging, updates thru my brother only, he is on Mars. 

Bailey, if we had matching shoes…. You will be hearing from /Silk/ soon I predict. I am weak and they know about me but not you. I am sorry. I love you. Goodbye for now! ~~~~~~~~~~ <3

- A.Well

*************************************

1 year later —————

It was to attempt to think in front of me and it was awkward now without subjects coming to see me - I never left the motel room and have not seen daylight. There are dreams of crows and the roar of trees of winds that I called peace but the crows from my bad dreams. I kept busy sifting thru war crime data and I have not heard from /Silk/ - would refuse jobs anyway. The thought of getting a bicycle was like heroin, and nobody could make out my face - even tho Sneurnka acutely invaded parts of here maybe two hours out.

My doppelgängers expired - Wolfman in the news but Bailey hail for peace never seen but remarkable invisibility. It is difficult to see forward; never had a track on her, my brother on Mars never alerts me, /Silk/ sends shocks to my chip twice a day but everyone uninvolved from past status and now I am an utter waste…. 

C might rival with Bailey, and Wolfman may end up like me: depressed and heartbroken without a seeming purpose but to tune into war and unable. He never made a death wish, and neither did I, but my eyes were red then. There is always the surrendering of brain in a /Silk/ lab, but seclusion has made me mad and any action at all seems like suicide - ah, trapped but was a villain. Earth has spun, and Sneurnka the action needed - /Silk/ will conquer the galaxy and imprison me as something official, differing from now in motels. 

***************** (mental hospital)

Daniel! I know you! I know you Daniel! Hey! I know you!

**************************

Doctor Frances floated him to sleep thru his veins……

[aisunn]

Click&Leads Review – Click & Leads Review

Click & Leads Review Evaluation! What’s inside Click & Leads? If you’re seeking a fast way of getting lots of fresh, prepared to purchase something leads - this is the software application for you. It’s basic and Incredibly Powerful. Imagine this - when you publish something on Facebook (anything - even other individuals’s video clips), whoever will click your post, gets included in your email checklist AND ALSO your Facebook audience! They do not need to opt-in, they don’t need to offer authorization - none of it. If they Click - you obtain the Lead - that’s all there is to it! There’s a variety of ways you can re-use various other people’s articles and also videos to get the leads - so you do not also need any kind of web content of your own. This is HUGE! Enjoy my complete evaluation as well as emo for information - this is a game changer for certain. Click & Leads Testimonial - do you recognize exactly how much do you usually require to spend for 1 lead? Depending on just how you get it it’s anywhere from $0.25 to $2 - for ONE e-mail lead. Of training course the even more info you get about the lead, the much more costly it is and it can go as high as $40 per lead! Currently, you understand what’s terrific regarding Click & Leads? You don’t have to pay ANYTHING - you obtain all the leads free of cost! Another fantastic thing is that you don’t need to fret about opt-in rates. If you acquire a 100 click solo advertisement as well as just 40 individuals opt-in - you’ve basically turned away 60 potential customers. It’s a Huge waste of cash … well, with Click & Leads you don’t need to bother with that as 100% of individuals that click your articles are instantly contributed to your list - and also your FB audience also, so you can re-target them with ads. To be entirely straightforward - I didn’t even recognize that this is feasible … as well as I was surprised when I saw this software program at work. Fail to remember any type of other resource of website traffic - this is it! As soon as you have your listing, you have cost-free traffic forever, whenever you want it. And also obviously, this functions in any kind of specific niche - you’re picking the posts and also video clips to begin with, so these can be concerning anything. You do not also need to pay to scale this up - if you desire to obtain even more leads, you basically up an additional message - it’s always free! Your days of having a hard time with gettign leads as well as traffic more than - this one app addresses everything for you as well as what’s also crazier is that you can obtain it for a single rate - no month-to-month repayments, no repeating costs, absolutely nothing like that - yet hurry since it’s just during the launch period. If you’re appreciating this Click & Leads Evaluation and also wish to find out more about Click & Leads, examine out my in depth video evaluation above!

https://artofmarketingblog.com/click-leads-review/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Si-9t0w5MDE https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KXwuLbKBcoM https://medium.com/@artflair/click-leads-review-click-leads-review-a22219ad5394 https://artflair.hatenablog.com/entry/2019/09/10/171933 https://artofimarketing.wordpress.com/2019/09/10/clickleads-review-click-leads-review/ https://theptcpromethod.blogspot.com/2019/09/click-review-click-leads-review.html http://artofimarketing.over-blog.com/2019/09/click-leads-review-click-leads-review.html https://scratch.mit.edu/projects/327949824/ https://twitter.com/artflairblog/status/1171339214190985217 https://www.facebook.com/groups/1564483110475032/permalink/2437864616470206/ https://www.facebook.com/groups/1009074692442562/permalink/2905414156141930/ https://www.reddit.com/user/IMArtFlair/comments/d24o81/clickleads_reviewdemo2625_bonus_click_leads_review/ https://www.reddit.com/user/IMArtFlair/comments/d24obd/clickleads_review_demo_2625_bonus_click_leads/ https://www.pinterest.pt/pin/466896686370204695/ https://vk.com/wall526840437_172 https://vk.com/id526840437?w=wall526840437_174%2Fall https://www.linkedin.com/feed/update/urn:li:activity:6577105844133994496/ https://www.linkedin.com/posts/art-of-marketing-612a8aa3_httpslnkdindss5tky-activity-6577105955534712832-MoYd 1– WP VIDEO ATTENTION (Worth $97)– WP Video Focus is a magnificent, useful WP plugin that permits you to conveniently clip your video to any kind of corner of your web page by working as a smart widget. Essentially, the video will certainly be playing and also “adhere to” the site visitor any place he or she scrolls on any type of given web page. Visitors will certainly proceed to have the ability to see the video and also no more just hear it, boosting responsiveness and involvement in methods you would certainly never ever envision would be feasible! 2– WP CHECK OUT MAXIMIZER (Worth $97)– WP Checkout Maximizer will assist you by enhancing your conversion sales, improve your buyer’s experience and additionally to drive social viral web traffic to your blog sites … in just a couple of simple actions. In just a couple of minutes I am mosting likely to show you just how you can drastically increase your conversions by 100X, as well as not just that, exactly how you can likewise begin driving outrageous viral traffic– easily. 3– PHOTO AND ALSO (Worth $37)– Aren’t you tired of spending lots of cash in copyrighted royalty cost-free pictures? Would certainly you like to get them RELEASE rather? Conveniently Tap Into Extra Than 1,000,000 Copyright-Free, High-Quality Images Straight From The Admin Area Of Your WordPress Blog To ensure that You’ll Never ever Need to Bother With Spending For Pictures Again! 4– WP ENGAGE (Worth $97)– Right here’s A Dead-Easy Method To Create Engaging Polls And To Survey Your Site Visitors Which Will Certainly Allow You To Clearly Understand What Their Opinion Of Your Website Is … So That You Can Begin Boosting Commissions, Subscribers, And Your Revenues! 5– EZ LAUNCHER (Value $37)– Obtain Your Hands Onto A Breakthrough WP Plugin That Will Allow You To Rapidly Set Up Your WordPress Blog As Well As Get It ‘Up And also Running’ In Much Less Than 30 Secs! If you are a specific niche marketing professional, affiliate marketing expert or on-line business owner that have whole lots of wordpress websites to launch on, having a tool that will certainly automate the introducing process would certainly be a huge aid to save more time. 6– LIVE CHAT (Value $97)– Brand Name New, Sizzling Hot WP Plugin Enables You To Add Conversion-Increasing Live Chats That Will Send Your Profits With The Roof covering! Essential Statement: If you are not interacting with your site visitors in an appropriate method, you are leaving cash on the table … 7– WP SIMPLE GEO (Worth $37)– One Of The Most Convenient And Fastest Method To Create Compensations And Also Reach Your Target Market … REALLY Specifically! If you look about, a growing number of on-line businesses as well as huge websites are beginning to implement an EXTREMELY profitable and also reliable approach. 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This enables individuals to opt-in right into your checklist from best inside of Facebook, and also they do not also require to leave Facebook! 13– SOCIAL MEDIA SITE BOOM (Value $37)– Exactly how would you such as today to transform your WordPress blog site into a social giant with one easy and also simple remedy? This would need to be the easiest and fastest method to enhance social conversions. Take the social functions of some of the greatest common web sites like Buzzfeed or UpWorthy as well as include them to your blog messages. No matter what theme you are using you can include these shortcodes to obtain all the social share functions you require to have viral post. 14– WP CAPTURE INQUIRY (Value $97)– Absolutely nothing beats targeted website traffic since this will certainly convert quite possibly contrasted to any other kinds of internet site web traffic. The big inquiry is, exactly how are you going to sort out those check outs to your website? The fast answer to that inquiry are surveys. And also that’s what WP Squeeze Inquiry Plugin functions.

[dorano121]

Click&Leads Review – Click & Leads Review

Click & Leads Review Evaluation! What’s inside Click & Leads? If you’re seeking a fast way of getting lots of fresh, prepared to purchase something leads - this is the software application for you. It’s basic and Incredibly Powerful. Imagine this - when you publish something on Facebook (anything - even other individuals’s video clips), whoever will click your post, gets included in your email checklist AND ALSO your Facebook audience! They do not need to opt-in, they don’t need to offer authorization - none of it. If they Click - you obtain the Lead - that’s all there is to it! There’s a variety of ways you can re-use various other people’s articles and also videos to get the leads - so you do not also need any kind of web content of your own. This is HUGE! Enjoy my complete evaluation as well as emo for information - this is a game changer for certain. Click & Leads Testimonial - do you recognize exactly how much do you usually require to spend for 1 lead? Depending on just how you get it it’s anywhere from $0.25 to $2 - for ONE e-mail lead. Of training course the even more info you get about the lead, the much more costly it is and it can go as high as $40 per lead! Currently, you understand what’s terrific regarding Click & Leads? You don’t have to pay ANYTHING - you obtain all the leads free of cost! Another fantastic thing is that you don’t need to fret about opt-in rates. If you acquire a 100 click solo advertisement as well as just 40 individuals opt-in - you’ve basically turned away 60 potential customers. It’s a Huge waste of cash … well, with Click & Leads you don’t need to bother with that as 100% of individuals that click your articles are instantly contributed to your list - and also your FB audience also, so you can re-target them with ads. To be entirely straightforward - I didn’t even recognize that this is feasible … as well as I was surprised when I saw this software program at work. Fail to remember any type of other resource of website traffic - this is it! As soon as you have your listing, you have cost-free traffic forever, whenever you want it. And also obviously, this functions in any kind of specific niche - you’re picking the posts and also video clips to begin with, so these can be concerning anything. You do not also need to pay to scale this up - if you desire to obtain even more leads, you basically up an additional message - it’s always free! Your days of having a hard time with gettign leads as well as traffic more than - this one app addresses everything for you as well as what’s also crazier is that you can obtain it for a single rate - no month-to-month repayments, no repeating costs, absolutely nothing like that - yet hurry since it’s just during the launch period. If you’re appreciating this Click & Leads Evaluation and also wish to find out more about Click & Leads, examine out my in depth video evaluation above!

https://artofmarketingblog.com/click-leads-review/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Si-9t0w5MDE https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KXwuLbKBcoM https://medium.com/@artflair/click-leads-review-click-leads-review-a22219ad5394 https://artflair.hatenablog.com/entry/2019/09/10/171933 https://artofimarketing.wordpress.com/2019/09/10/clickleads-review-click-leads-review/ https://theptcpromethod.blogspot.com/2019/09/click-review-click-leads-review.html http://artofimarketing.over-blog.com/2019/09/click-leads-review-click-leads-review.html https://scratch.mit.edu/projects/327949824/ https://twitter.com/artflairblog/status/1171339214190985217 https://www.facebook.com/groups/1564483110475032/permalink/2437864616470206/ https://www.facebook.com/groups/1009074692442562/permalink/2905414156141930/ https://www.reddit.com/user/IMArtFlair/comments/d24o81/clickleads_reviewdemo2625_bonus_click_leads_review/ https://www.reddit.com/user/IMArtFlair/comments/d24obd/clickleads_review_demo_2625_bonus_click_leads/ https://www.pinterest.pt/pin/466896686370204695/ https://vk.com/wall526840437_172 https://vk.com/id526840437?w=wall526840437_174%2Fall https://www.linkedin.com/feed/update/urn:li:activity:6577105844133994496/ https://www.linkedin.com/posts/art-of-marketing-612a8aa3_httpslnkdindss5tky-activity-6577105955534712832-MoYd 1– WP VIDEO ATTENTION (Worth $97)– WP Video Focus is a magnificent, useful WP plugin that permits you to conveniently clip your video to any kind of corner of your web page by working as a smart widget. Essentially, the video will certainly be playing and also “adhere to” the site visitor any place he or she scrolls on any type of given web page. Visitors will certainly proceed to have the ability to see the video and also no more just hear it, boosting responsiveness and involvement in methods you would certainly never ever envision would be feasible! 2– WP CHECK OUT MAXIMIZER (Worth $97)– WP Checkout Maximizer will assist you by enhancing your conversion sales, improve your buyer’s experience and additionally to drive social viral web traffic to your blog sites … in just a couple of simple actions. In just a couple of minutes I am mosting likely to show you just how you can drastically increase your conversions by 100X, as well as not just that, exactly how you can likewise begin driving outrageous viral traffic– easily. 3– PHOTO AND ALSO (Worth $37)– Aren’t you tired of spending lots of cash in copyrighted royalty cost-free pictures? Would certainly you like to get them RELEASE rather? Conveniently Tap Into Extra Than 1,000,000 Copyright-Free, High-Quality Images Straight From The Admin Area Of Your WordPress Blog To ensure that You’ll Never ever Need to Bother With Spending For Pictures Again! 4– WP ENGAGE (Worth $97)– Right here’s A Dead-Easy Method To Create Engaging Polls And To Survey Your Site Visitors Which Will Certainly Allow You To Clearly Understand What Their Opinion Of Your Website Is … So That You Can Begin Boosting Commissions, Subscribers, And Your Revenues! 5– EZ LAUNCHER (Value $37)– Obtain Your Hands Onto A Breakthrough WP Plugin That Will Allow You To Rapidly Set Up Your WordPress Blog As Well As Get It ‘Up And also Running’ In Much Less Than 30 Secs! If you are a specific niche marketing professional, affiliate marketing expert or on-line business owner that have whole lots of wordpress websites to launch on, having a tool that will certainly automate the introducing process would certainly be a huge aid to save more time. 6– LIVE CHAT (Value $97)– Brand Name New, Sizzling Hot WP Plugin Enables You To Add Conversion-Increasing Live Chats That Will Send Your Profits With The Roof covering! Essential Statement: If you are not interacting with your site visitors in an appropriate method, you are leaving cash on the table … 7– WP SIMPLE GEO (Worth $37)– One Of The Most Convenient And Fastest Method To Create Compensations And Also Reach Your Target Market … REALLY Specifically! If you look about, a growing number of on-line businesses as well as huge websites are beginning to implement an EXTREMELY profitable and also reliable approach. This effective technique consists in showing web content in their websites based only on GEO. 8– LEADBOOK GENERATOR (Value $97)– Lastly You Can Take Advantage Of The Power Of Facebook to Grow Your Email Checklist … Without The High Expenses! With this effective plugin, you can conveniently integrate Facebook Lead Advertisements with your autoresponder and have your leads included to your mailing listing immediately! 9– PROGRAM YOUR UPCOMING MESSAGES (Value $37)– This is an excellent means to get your website viewers to see your future messages/ to obtain site visitors to go back to your website/ to get even more enroll in your newsletter or RSS feed. Whole lots of alternatives, including program “x” variety of blog posts which remain in draft, which are readied to be released at a later day– or a combination of both. 10– ASSOCIATE LINK CLOAKER (Value $97)– Discover Just How This WordPress Plugin Can Boost Click Thru Rates and also Skyrocket Your Associate Payments By At Least 300%. Increase Click Thurs, Protect Commissions, Avoid Spam Filters As Well As Improve Your Web Link SEO. 11– WORDPRESS SUBSCRIPTION (Worth $37)– How would you like to start making easy earnings right from your WordPress website? Today you can with this very easy to utilize WordPress plugin you’re mosting likely to be able to effortlessly develop expert sites in operation is very membership plugin! With this WordPress plugin, you can construct an attractive as well as durable subscription website in minutes. As well as not only that, however you’re likewise getting motifs, sale web pages, sales material plus a lot a lot more. 12– FB FOLLOWER PAGE PRO (Value $37)– FanPages enable you to obtain LEADS from the HUGE facebook social network. With FanPagePro2.0 you can produce simple as well as efficient squeeze web pages and also touchdown web pages for your follower pages as well as send web traffic to those web pages from ideal INSIDE of facebook. This enables individuals to opt-in right into your checklist from best inside of Facebook, and also they do not also require to leave Facebook! 13– SOCIAL MEDIA SITE BOOM (Value $37)– Exactly how would you such as today to transform your WordPress blog site into a social giant with one easy and also simple remedy? This would need to be the easiest and fastest method to enhance social conversions. Take the social functions of some of the greatest common web sites like Buzzfeed or UpWorthy as well as include them to your blog messages. No matter what theme you are using you can include these shortcodes to obtain all the social share functions you require to have viral post. 14– WP CAPTURE INQUIRY (Value $97)– Absolutely nothing beats targeted website traffic since this will certainly convert quite possibly contrasted to any other kinds of internet site web traffic. The big inquiry is, exactly how are you going to sort out those check outs to your website? The fast answer to that inquiry are surveys. And also that’s what WP Squeeze Inquiry Plugin functions.

[chaeyounggg]

Click&Leads Review – Click & Leads Review

Click & Leads Review Testimonial! What’s inside Click & Leads? If you’re seeking a quick way of obtaining lots of fresh, ready to buy something leads - this is the software program for you. It’s simple and Incredibly Powerful. Imagine this - when you upload something on Facebook (anything - even other people’s video clips), whoever will click on your article, gets added to your e-mail listing As Well As your Facebook audience! They do not need to opt-in, they do not require to allow - none of it. If they Click - you get the Lead - that’s all there is to it! There’s a number of ways you can re-use other individuals’s blog posts as well as video clips to get the leads - so you do not also require any kind of web content of your own. This is HUGE! Enjoy my full testimonial and also emo for details - this is a video game changer for certain. Click & Leads Review - do you understand just how much do you usually need to pay for 1 lead? Relying on how you get it it’s anywhere from $0.25 to $2 - for ONE e-mail lead. Certainly the more information you get regarding the lead, the a lot more costly it is and it can go as high as $40 per lead! Now, you understand what’s excellent about Click & Leads? You don’t need to pay ANYTHING - you get all the leads free of cost! An additional impressive thing is that you do not have to bother with opt-in rates. If you buy a 100 click solo advertisement and only 40 people opt-in - you’ve essentially turned away 60 possible customers. It’s a Huge waste of money … well, with Click & Leads you don’t need to stress over that as 100% of individuals who click your articles are automatically included in your listing - and also your FB target market as well, so you can re-target them with advertisements. To be totally sincere - I really did not even recognize that this is possible … and also I was surprised when I saw this software in action. Fail to remember any kind of various other source of web traffic - this is it! When you have your list, you have complimentary web traffic for life, whenever you desire it. And naturally, this functions in any type of niche - you’re selecting the messages and videos in the initial place, so these can be about anything. You do not even require to pay to scale this up - if you intend to obtain more leads, you basically up another post - it’s constantly complimentary! Your days of fighting with gettign leads and also website traffic are over - this set application solves it all for you and also what’s even crazier is that you can get it for a single price - no month-to-month repayments, no repeating charges, absolutely nothing like that - however hurry due to the fact that it’s only throughout the launch period. If you’re appreciating this Click & Leads Review and also intend to find out even more regarding Click & Leads, take a look at my comprehensive video clip testimonial over!

https://artofmarketingblog.com/click-leads-review/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Si-9t0w5MDE https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KXwuLbKBcoM https://medium.com/@artflair/click-leads-review-click-leads-review-a22219ad5394 https://artflair.hatenablog.com/entry/2019/09/10/171933 https://artofimarketing.wordpress.com/2019/09/10/clickleads-review-click-leads-review/ https://theptcpromethod.blogspot.com/2019/09/click-review-click-leads-review.html http://artofimarketing.over-blog.com/2019/09/click-leads-review-click-leads-review.html https://scratch.mit.edu/projects/327949824/ https://twitter.com/artflairblog/status/1171339214190985217 https://www.facebook.com/groups/1564483110475032/permalink/2437864616470206/ https://www.facebook.com/groups/1009074692442562/permalink/2905414156141930/ https://www.reddit.com/user/IMArtFlair/comments/d24o81/clickleads_reviewdemo2625_bonus_click_leads_review/ https://www.reddit.com/user/IMArtFlair/comments/d24obd/clickleads_review_demo_2625_bonus_click_leads/ https://www.pinterest.pt/pin/466896686370204695/ https://vk.com/wall526840437_172 https://vk.com/id526840437?w=wall526840437_174%2Fall https://www.linkedin.com/feed/update/urn:li:activity:6577105844133994496/ https://www.linkedin.com/posts/art-of-marketing-612a8aa3_httpslnkdindss5tky-activity-6577105955534712832-MoYd 1– WP VIDEO CLIP FOCUS (Value $97)– WP Video Clip Interest is a wonderful, practical WP plugin that enables you to quickly clip your video to any kind of edge of your page by offering as a smart widget. Basically, the video will be playing and also “comply with” the visitor anywhere she or he scrolls on any kind of given page. Site visitors will continue to have the ability to see the video and no longer only hear it, raising responsiveness and engagement in ways you would never ever imagine would be possible! 2– WP CHECK OUT MAXIMIZER (Value $97)– WP Check out Maximizer will certainly aid you by increasing your conversion sales, enhance your buyer’s experience as well as additionally to drive social viral website traffic to your blogs … in simply a couple of easy actions. In just a couple of moments I am going to show you exactly how you can considerably raise your conversions by 100X, and not just that, just how you can likewise start driving insane viral website traffic– effortlessly. 3– PHOTO AND ALSO (Worth $37)– Aren’t you tired of investing loads of cash in copyrighted nobility free pictures? Would certainly you like to obtain them FREE rather? Quickly Tap Into More Than 1,000,000 Copyright-Free, High-Quality Images Straight From The Admin Location Of Your WordPress Blog site To make sure that You’ll Never Have To Worry About Paying For Photos Once More! 4– WP ENGAGE (Value $97)– Here’s A Dead-Easy Method To Produce Engaging Surveys And To Survey Your Visitors Which Will Certainly Enable You To Clearly Recognize What Their Opinion Of Your Website Is … So That You Can Start Increasing Payments, Subscribers, And Also Your Earnings! 5– EZ LAUNCHER (Value $37)– Get Your Hands Onto An Innovation WP Plugin That Will Enable You To Swiftly Set Up Your WordPress Blog As Well As Obtain It ‘Up And also Running’ In Much Less Than 30 Secs! If you are a particular niche marketer, affiliate online marketer or on the internet entrepreneur that have lots of wordpress websites to introduce on, having a tool that will certainly automate the releasing process would certainly be a substantial help to conserve even more time. 6– LIVE CHAT (Worth $97)– Brand-new, Sizzling Hot WP Plugin Enables You To Include Conversion-Increasing Live Chats That Will Send Your Revenues Via The Roof! Crucial Statement: If you are not connecting with your visitors in a proper means, you are leaving loan on the table … 7– WP SIMPLE GEO (Value $37)– One Of The Simplest And Also Fastest Means To Generate Compensations And Reach Your Audience … VERY Exactly! If you check out, a growing number of online organisations and also huge websites are beginning to implement an EXTREMELY profitable as well as efficient technique. This powerful technique consists in displaying material in their sites based entirely on GEO. 8– LEADBOOK GENERATOR (Worth $97)– Ultimately You Can Utilize The Power Of Facebook to Expand Your Email List … Without The High Expenses! With this powerful plugin, you can conveniently incorporate Facebook Lead Advertisements with your autoresponder and also have your leads included in your newsletter instantly! 9– PROGRAM YOUR UPCOMING POSTS (Value $37)– This is a terrific means to get your web site visitors to see your future articles/ to get visitors to return to your website/ to obtain even more sign ups for your newsletter or RSS feed. Great deals of alternatives, consisting of program “x” number of articles which remain in draft, which are set to be published at a later date– or a mix of both. 10– ASSOCIATE LINK CLOAKER (Value $97)– Discover How This WordPress Plugin Can Enhance Click Thru Fees and also Skyrocket Your Affiliate Compensations By At Least 300%. Rise Click Thurs, Protect Payments, Avoid Spam Filters And Improve Your Web Link SEO. 11– WORDPRESS SUBSCRIPTION (Worth $37)– Exactly how would certainly you like to begin making passive earnings right from your WordPress website? Today you can with this extremely simple to use WordPress plugin you’re mosting likely to be able to easily produce professional sites in operation is really membership plugin! With this WordPress plugin, you can build an attractive and also durable membership website in minutes. As well as not just that, yet you’re also getting styles, sale pages, sales product plus so a lot extra. 12– FB FAN WEB PAGE PRO (Worth $37)– FanPages allow you to get LEADS from the HUGE facebook social media network. With FanPagePro2.0 you can create simple as well as effective press web pages and touchdown web pages for your follower pages and send out traffic to those web pages from ideal INSIDE of facebook. This enables individuals to opt-in into your list from best within Facebook, as well as they do not also need to leave Facebook! 13– SOCIAL MEDIA SITE BOOM (Worth $37)– Exactly how would you such as today to turn your WordPress blog site into a social powerhouse with one easy and also simple solution? This would certainly have to be the simplest and fastest method to boost social conversions. Take the social attributes of some of the greatest shared websites like Buzzfeed or UpWorthy and also add them to your article. Regardless of what style you are using you can include these shortcodes to obtain all the social share features you require to have viral blog site messages. 14– WP CAPTURE QUESTION (Worth $97)– Absolutely nothing beats targeted website traffic due to the fact that this will certainly convert quite possibly contrasted to any other sorts of website web traffic. The huge concern is, how are you mosting likely to figure out those check outs to your web site? The quick solution to that concern are surveys. And also that’s what WP Capture Concern Plugin functions.

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Click&Leads Review – Click & Leads Review

Click & Leads Review Evaluation! What’s inside Click & Leads? If you’re trying to find a fast way of getting heaps of fresh, all set to buy something leads - this is the software for you. It’s straightforward and also Super Powerful. Envision this - when you upload something on Facebook (anything - also other individuals’s videos), whoever will click your message, gets contributed to your e-mail checklist As Well As your Facebook target market! They do not require to opt-in, they don’t need to allow - none of it. If they Click - you obtain the Lead - that’s all there is to it! There’s a variety of ways you can re-use other individuals’s blog posts and video clips to get the leads - so you don’t even need any content of your very own. This is HUGE! Enjoy my complete review as well as emo for details - this set is a video game changer for certain. Click & Leads Evaluation - do you understand just how much do you normally require to pay for 1 lead? Depending upon how you get it it’s anywhere from $0.25 to $2 - for ONE e-mail lead. Naturally the more details you get regarding the lead, the much more costly it is as well as it can go as high as $40 per lead! Currently, you know what’s fantastic concerning Click & Leads? You don’t have to pay ANYTHING - you obtain all the leads for complimentary! Another remarkable point is that you do not need to stress about opt-in rates. If you get a 100 click solo advertisement as well as only 40 individuals opt-in - you’ve essentially averted 60 possible clients. It’s a Massive waste of loan … well, with Click & Leads you don’t have to fret about that as 100% of individuals that click your blog posts are immediately contributed to your checklist - as well as your FB audience as well, so you can re-target them with advertisements. To be completely sincere - I really did not also recognize that this is feasible … and I was blown away when I saw this software in activity. Fail to remember any type of various other resource of website traffic - this is it! When you have your checklist, you have free web traffic forever, whenever you desire it. As well as obviously, this functions in any particular niche - you’re selecting the messages and also video clips to begin with, so these can be regarding anything. You do not even require to pay to scale this up - if you intend to get more leads, you basically up another post - it’s constantly totally free! Your days of battling with gettign leads as well as traffic are over - this application resolves it all for you and what’s also crazier is that you can get it for a single price - no regular monthly payments, no recurring charges, nothing like that - yet hurry since it’s just during the launch period. If you’re appreciating this Click & Leads Review and also intend to learn more concerning Click & Leads, have a look at my in depth video evaluation above!

https://artofmarketingblog.com/click-leads-review/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Si-9t0w5MDE https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KXwuLbKBcoM https://medium.com/@artflair/click-leads-review-click-leads-review-a22219ad5394 https://artflair.hatenablog.com/entry/2019/09/10/171933 https://artofimarketing.wordpress.com/2019/09/10/clickleads-review-click-leads-review/ https://theptcpromethod.blogspot.com/2019/09/click-review-click-leads-review.html http://artofimarketing.over-blog.com/2019/09/click-leads-review-click-leads-review.html https://scratch.mit.edu/projects/327949824/ https://twitter.com/artflairblog/status/1171339214190985217 https://www.facebook.com/groups/1564483110475032/permalink/2437864616470206/ https://www.facebook.com/groups/1009074692442562/permalink/2905414156141930/ https://www.reddit.com/user/IMArtFlair/comments/d24o81/clickleads_reviewdemo2625_bonus_click_leads_review/ https://www.reddit.com/user/IMArtFlair/comments/d24obd/clickleads_review_demo_2625_bonus_click_leads/ https://www.pinterest.pt/pin/466896686370204695/ https://vk.com/wall526840437_172 https://vk.com/id526840437?w=wall526840437_174%2Fall https://www.linkedin.com/feed/update/urn:li:activity:6577105844133994496/ https://www.linkedin.com/posts/art-of-marketing-612a8aa3_httpslnkdindss5tky-activity-6577105955534712832-MoYd 1– WP VIDEO CLIP ATTENTION (Worth $97)– WP Video Focus is a spectacular, sensible WP plugin that allows you to quickly clip your video clip to any kind of corner of your web page by working as a wise widget. Generally, the video will be playing and “follow” the visitor wherever he or she scrolls on any type of provided web page. Site visitors will remain to be able to see the video clip as well as no more only hear it, boosting responsiveness and also engagement in means you would certainly never visualize would certainly be feasible! 2– WP CHECK OUT MAXIMIZER (Value $97)– WP Checkout Maximizer will aid you by boosting your conversion sales, improve your purchaser’s experience as well as additionally to drive social viral web traffic to your blog sites … in just a couple of easy steps. In simply a few minutes I am going to show you exactly how you can drastically enhance your conversions by 100X, and not only that, exactly how you can additionally begin driving ridiculous viral website traffic– easily. 3– IMAGE AND ALSO (Value $37)– Aren’t you tired of costs loads of money in copyrighted aristocracy free images? Would you such as to get them FREE instead? Easily Tap Into Much More Than 1,000,000 Copyright-Free, High-Quality Images Straight From The Admin Location Of Your WordPress Blog To ensure that You’ll Never Need to Bother With Spending For Images Once More! 4– WP ENGAGE (Worth $97)– Here’s A Dead-Easy Way To Produce Engaging Surveys And Also To Study Your Site Visitors Which Will Allow You To Clearly Comprehend What Their Opinion Of Your Site Is … To Make Sure That You Can Begin Raising Payments, Customers, And Your Revenues! 5– EZ LAUNCHER (Worth $37)– Get Your Hands Onto A Breakthrough WP Plugin That Will Permit You To Quickly Establish Up Your WordPress Blog Site And Also Obtain It ‘Up And also Running’ In Less Than 30 Secs! If you are a particular niche marketing expert, associate marketing professional or on the internet entrepreneur that have great deals of wordpress internet sites to introduce on, having a tool that will certainly automate the introducing process would certainly be a big help to save more time. 6– LIVE CONVERSATION (Worth $97)– Brand-new, Sizzling Hot WP Plugin Enables You To Include Conversion-Increasing Live Chats That Will Send Your Profits Through The Roofing system! Crucial Announcement: If you are not communicating with your visitors in a correct way, you are leaving loan on the table … 7– WP SIMPLE GEO (Worth $37)– One Of The Most Convenient As Well As Fastest Way To Generate Commissions And Reach Your Audience … EXTREMELY Precisely! If you take a look around, more and also more on the internet organisations and also big sites are beginning to carry out a REALLY lucrative as well as effective method. This effective strategy is composed in showing material in their sites based exclusively on GEO. 8– LEADBOOK GENERATOR (Value $97)– Ultimately You Can Utilize The Power Of Facebook to Expand Your Email Listing … Without The High Prices! With this powerful plugin, you can conveniently incorporate Facebook Lead Advertisements with your autoresponder and have your leads included in your mailing listing instantly! 9– PROGRAM YOUR UPCOMING ARTICLES (Value $37)– This is a fantastic way to obtain your internet site audiences to see your approaching articles/ to obtain site visitors to return to your site/ to get more register for your e-newsletter or RSS feed. Great deals of alternatives, consisting of show “x” variety of blog posts which remain in draft, which are readied to be published at a later day– or a combination of both. 10– ASSOCIATE WEB LINK CLOAKER (Value $97)– Discover Exactly How This WordPress Plugin Can Enhance Click Thru Rates as well as Skyrocket Your Associate Compensations By A Minimum Of 300%. Rise Click Thurs, Protect Payments, Stay Clear Of Spam Filters As Well As Improve Your Link Search Engine Optimization. 11– WORDPRESS SUBSCRIPTION (Worth $37)– How would you such as to begin making easy earnings right from your WordPress site? Today you can with this very simple to utilize WordPress plugin you’re going to be able to effortlessly produce professional sites in using is very membership plugin! With this WordPress plugin, you can build a lovely as well as robust subscription website in mins. As well as not just that, yet you’re likewise obtaining motifs, sale pages, sales product plus a lot more. 12– FB FAN PAGE PRO (Worth $37)– FanPages enable you to get LEADS from the HUGE facebook social network. With FanPagePro2.0 you can produce easy as well as reliable capture web pages as well as landing web pages for your follower web pages as well as send out web traffic to those pages from appropriate INSIDE of facebook. This enables individuals to opt-in into your listing from ideal within Facebook, and they don’t also need to leave Facebook! 13– SOCIAL MEDIA BOOM (Worth $37)– Just how would you like today to transform your WordPress blog into a social giant with one easy and simple solution? This would need to be the simplest and also fastest method to increase social conversions. Take the social functions of some of the highest possible common internet sites like Buzzfeed or UpWorthy and add them to your blog site articles. Whatever style you are using you can add these shortcodes to obtain all the social share features you need to have viral post. 14– WP CAPTURE INQUIRY (Worth $97)– Absolutely nothing beats targeted traffic since this will certainly convert effectively compared to any various other kinds of website traffic. The huge concern is, exactly how are you going to iron out those visits to your site? The quick response to that question are surveys. As well as that’s what WP Squeeze Inquiry Plugin works.