My Liberation Notes : - Today, I feel tired again. Last week, I thought I was finally out of the loop, that I have broke free of the cycle. But today, I am back to square one. My chest keeps tightening, tears keep falling and it feels like I can't do it anymore. It feels like I have done enough for a lifetime. Every moment that I'm awake feels like work. I don't know where it all started to go wrong. I don't even know if this could be termed wrong. I don't know when I changed into the person I am today - fragile, weak, on the verge of breakdowns every second. I don't know when I stopped trying to fight back or when I lost the strength to do so. I don't know when I started feeling scared or small for telling people things that can't be done, of accepting I am not perfect and I could never be. I don't know when I started feeling guilty for who I am today , or feeling sorry for my mother for having a daughter like me - sensitive, emotional and complicated. I no longer see things simple. I make it all too complex to sort out. I can't bring myself to quit or break free of the definitions that hold me. I am trapped in a cage of my expectations and others. There are pieces of me at war with each other, each trying to win over the other. I try to tell myself otherwise. I calm myself down like a kid, telling it's all going to be okay. I find dark corners in my house where I could cry my heart out. I try soothing my soul with things I once loved and enjoyed. I whine, complain, tell people I am done and feel ashamed again. Eventually, I pull myself out for a few days and go back to that same gloom filled room again. And I repeat. I repeat these things in hope of holding on. And I hold on, today. I live. PIC CREDIT : pinterest, kdrama - My liberation notes. #myliberationnotes #kdramalover #kdramaisnpired #kdramas #love #life #lost #lifequotes #kdramaquotes #mrgu #kimmiyeong #kdramlife #kdramalessons #mentalhealth #depressedlife #anxiety #breakdowns #panicattacks #writingcommunity #writeups #writersofig #writersofinstagram #tired #exhausted #tiredofeverything #wordsofinstagram #wordsofwisdom #wordporn #wordpornoftheday #womenwritersofinstagram (at Some Were Under the Sky) https://www.instagram.com/p/CgZwjGaJPyb/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=
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낭만닥터 김사부
Quotes from Dr Romantic 01
Time of injustice
Time of discrimination
Time of grievance and distrust
Injudicious medical operations and discrimination against patients created times of injustice in the medical field.
Do you feel better after letting it all out? Why do you care?
Do not be mistaken.
Taking it out on others doesn’t mean you take revenge. No matter how much fuss you make with your baseball bat, those people won’t even remember your face.
If you really want revenge, become a better man than those people. Pay them back with your capability rather than your reach. Unless you change nothing will change.
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You’re calling the shots on that operation. If your decision is to give up and collect done, nobody’s going to blame you. But if you do so, you would look back on that moment for the rest of your life.
I don’t feel confident enough to save this patient.
Dr Kang do you know what’s worse than death on the operating table? It’s the regret you get thinking, you might have been able to save the patient by not giving up. That thought will haunt you for the rest of your life. If there something worse than failure, it’s regret.
What do you say?
If you don’t think you can do it , close him up before making him suffer even more. Okay, I said, you’re the one calling the shots. Do as you wish.
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Times of valuelessness
People are lost in an ideology of success. People lose their value to be recognised by others. What’s life all about? People are too busy making a living that they don’t even know what life is all about.
Times of disregarding wounds
People are willing to disregard other people’s wounds for their own interests. In order to keep their prestige, people never care about other people’s pain. And people can’t even look after their own wounds. They all turn their faces away from the reality or their wounds in the name of self- defense.
There is only one way to see if a doctor is doing the job for right. You can see that through the patient. That’s the only way. Don’t try to take responsibility for the patient unfortunate death. All you have to do is doing your best as you learned. Just focus on that.
When you became my age, You’ll be able to see things. Whether someone is a real deal or not?
Times of concealment of truth
Times of distorted truth and full of lies. With all the groundless rumours and vicious gossip The essence of a man has to take a backseat. What’s real and what’s not real? You can’t even tell what is real in this world.
Greed is often self-justified.
They said it couldn’t be helped.
That it was the only choice they could make.
It seems like you’re sick with greed, not your conscience. I do know a little bit the dilemma your kinds face between reality and ideals. But a surgeon who has someone’s life in their hands should also live with the responsibility as heavy as a person’s life. Do remember that.
Time of needs
The other needs are prioritised over one own’s decisions. Before you even realise what you really want the world forces you to adapt to its standards.
Things get exaggerated . Sometimes you exaggerate the fact with lies. In the end it requires you to make others fall in despair. This is the world we live in.
Do not to degrade yourself by making yourself expendable.
The era of rampant facts
The world, where, and what powerful people say, is considered as a fact where powerless people’s words are considered as a wild rumour. With their opinions and lies that distort the truth, people insist their opinions are the facts in this world. The truth always rooted on facts. But not all the facts are always right.
If you know the truth, do you have the courage to tell it to the world ?
In our lives, there are things you can only see after the lapse of time. Such as why such things happened to me, why I met those people, and why that coincidence even happened. There are moments that I had no regard for. And soon, they start to have significance one by one. At some point, it started making a path.
The stronger resistance in the world is pushing on undaunted to finish your job no matter what the circumstances are.
Teacher Kim might have already known that the weight of our worries and fears could be lighter than a feather.
The scariest thing in the world is the seed of doubt. When you plant one, it’s grows well by itself.
Do you know what’s the easiest thing in this world?
It’s breaking a relationship. It doesn’t require any money nor effort. You can do it with a single word.
Do you know what is the hardest thing in this world is? It’s to overcome yourself.
He just didn’t know how to win. He stayed silent. He didn’t want to make excuses. He thought that was the way of becoming responsible.
Are you being a doctor to change the world? I’m not. I’m doing my job as a doctor to save other people. To a person who is dying, I’m the only hope at that moment. If I step back, the person would die. I don’t give up and try a little bit harder, that person would live. People called that swaggering. The fancy word to describe it is romantic.
I believe that there are more young doctor want to become a good doctor rather than a doctor who runs after money.
The law of conservation of romance
There are things that the most people believe don’t exist, even though they know of their existence. Still, they hope someone could preserve those things. They’re beautiful values.
Life is about turning into different roads. Whether you want it or not, you have to face the reality which is placed in front of you. You cannot find the right answer every single time. But Teacher Kim always said this : do not give up asking the questions about why we live and what we live for. The moment you give up on that, the romance in life ends.
There is a beginning to everything . And behind every beginning, there is a cause and motivation. It can be from myself or from someone else. Once it begins, it creates direction in life. And through the journey, it creates a form of life. The beginning of Everything. Could there be any fate or coincidence stronger than that?
Quotes from Dr Romantic 02
The era of cost effectiveness
This is the world where every relationship is evaluated on efficiency and benefits. Responsibilities and duties degenerate into irrational sacrifice. The world has turned into a place where even are common good, and kindness has thrown into benefits and numbers.
The era of distortion
It lockup even righteous convictions in black-and-white logic. This strange world even judges universal values to be right or wrong, according to one self-interests. They think power give them rights. They claim their privilege is justified. They put basic civility behind them. The world became a place for people who believe they must crush another to proof that they are right.
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드라마 '내 남편과 결혼해줘'를 보다가 생각난 대사를 썼습니다. 친절하게 상대방을 대하는 건 좋지만, 나에게 무례하게 행동하는 사람에게까지 웃으며 대화할 수는 없죠🙄 그럴 땐 속앓이 하지 말고 당당히 할 말을 하고 살아요🍎 그림은 희생이라는 꽃말을 지닌 마취목입니다. 상대의 무례한 행동이 반복됨에도 친구라는 관계를 유지하기위해 나를 희생하지 맙시다 😂
-인간관계 글귀: '나를 막 대하는 사람한테 잘 해 줄 필요없다는 걸 배웠어요.' -드라마 '내 남편과 결혼해줘' 중에서-
-Human relationship quote: 'I've learned that I don't have to be nice to people who treat me poorly.' -From the Kdrama 'Marry My Husband'-
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