#khol looks great and i need to do more with them

[chlorinewaterdrinker]

Pizza pizza

[skyjasper]

Imagine Being Loved By Me

Gwynriel: Talk by Hozier

COMPLETELY INSPIRED BY @avabrynne !!!

This idea comes completely from @avabrynne !! Great thanks to her for letting me use this prompt!!!

Masterlist

Summary: Gwyn and Azriel had been tiptoeing around her connection for almost a year now. The night before summer solstice the group goes out to Rita’s. Things finally snap for them when Azriel sings her a song.

Warnings: light NSFW, other than that nothing!! Complete fluff!!

Word count:3270

~~~

It was the week of summer solstice which meant the glorious city of Velaris was bustling with parties and celebrations. Gwyn had been comfortable enough to start going out with her girls and the inner circle by last winter solstice after Nesta and Cassian got together.

So here she sat in Nesta's room getting ready with Mor, Emerie, Nesta, and Feyre. She sat on the bed watching as Nesta moved her hair into a lovely ponytail. Nesta's eyes met hers through the mirror.

“Come on Gwyn, let's find you a dress, Mor can you do her makeup?” She turned to the blonde and waited for a nod before walking off to her wardrobe. Gwyn moved into the stool that sat in front of Nesta's vanity, staring at Mor evaluating her.

“Let’s make you irresistible, maybe you’ll find a lovely suitor.” Mor’s brows wiggled with intention as Gwyn’s cheeks flushed.

She didn’t tell anyone about her small crush on the court's shadow singer, nor did she tell anyone about their midnight training sessions. She nodded her head to Mor with a smile.

“Oh, I haven’t even thought about that. Where are we even going tonight?” She asked as Mor applied a Smokey line of Khol to her eyes.

“Rita’s is having a live singing night tonight so we are going to go and force the boys to sing,” Feyre spoke from her spot next to Gwyn.

“All the boys?” She poked her head to look at Feyre before Mor grabbed her chin to guide her back to where she needed.

“That’s the goal!” Feyre's happy voice chipped.

“I found the perfect dress!” Nesta shouted before coming out of her closet with a mid-length silk dress that was the same shade of blue as her priestess robes. A gorgeous number that had Gwyn melting at the idea of wearing such a delicate piece on her body.

“That’s gorgeous Nes, I can’t possibly take that from you.” She whispered as if her voice would hurt the dress.

“Gwyn, I don’t even know why I have this dress, it certainly is not my color.” Nesta shrugged before moving to place the dress over a chair.

“Hey, Gwyn?” Emorie came to sit next to the nymph.

“Yes Em?”

“You remember when we went and you bought those lacy underthings even though you knew you weren’t gonna wear them?” She whispered only loud enough for the two of them to hear.

“Yes, I got them because they gave me power over myself, even though I have no reason to wear them they make me feel pretty,” Gwyn responded, currently applying a reddish-pinkish colored lip salve.

“Well… they would be perfect to wear under this dress.” Emorie shrugged. Gwyn paused, contemplating it, after a hesitant moment she nodded and stood to ask the house to retrieve them.

Once she was in the bathroom with the dress and her underthings she quickly changed. She pulled on the light blue lacy underthings before slipping on the matching slip for it. She took a second to observe herself in the mirror, reminding herself of her affirmations. I am the rock against which the surf crashes. Nothing can break me.

She pulled on the tight piece of silk, marveling at how it hugged her form to her waist before slightly tapering out into a lovely flowing skirt. The neckline was something she hadn’t seen before, the fabric was rippled in a purposeful way to look like loose silk when in fact it was not. It gave her a sight of her cleavage, her breasts were not large but they were at least a handful. The skirt had a dangerously high slight that came to rest at mid-thigh. As she laced the back her waist became more accentuated.

Gwyn took a second to take in the sight of herself and how beautiful she looked. The light blue- almost iridescent- silk showed off her slight tan from training and her vibrant hair. Even her freckles seemed more prominent.

“You ok in there Gwyn?” Nesta's voice asked, laden with concern from the other side of the door. Gwyn walked over to the door and opened it.

“Yeah, I’m ok. Are you sure this dress isn’t too much for tonight?” Gwyn asked shyly.

“No this is perfect! You look gorgeous Gwyn! Let’s do your hair.” Came Feyres voice from behind Nesta who was still staring at Gwyn with her jaw open.

“You look absolutely stunning Gwinnie. I know a certain male who is going to explode when he sees you.” Nesta told her while pulling her back to the vanity.

Gwyn took a second to mull over Nesta's words as one of the girls put two thin braids in her hair at the front before pulling it up into a ponytail, one braid running on each side.

“Who do you mean Nes?” Gwyn finally found the courage to ask, hoping she doesn’t sound as hopeful as she is.

“Oh come on Gwyn, we all know the shadow singer holds a certain appreciation for you, we see the way he looks at you. And those midnight training sessions, he’s never done that with anyone.” Mor spoke from behind her as she applied perfume oils to her skin.

“Wh-what, I don’t know what you are on about. Az and I are certainly just friends.” Gwyn blushed at the implication.

“If that’s what you think.” Emorie chuckled.

~~~

More and Feyre winnowed all of them to Rita’s. The girls ordered a round of drinks while waiting for the males. Not five seconds after their drinks were in hand did they hear the unmistakable sound of Cassian’s laugh.

They all turned towards the sound, finding Rhys dressed in his normal dress pants and a button-down, Cassain in typical pants and a loose top. Gwen slightly choked on her drink when her gaze ran across Azriel, he was hardly ever seen outside of his leathers, but tonight he wore black tight jeans and a black shirt that hugged his muscles, his wings standing proud and his black hair a bit messy. He looked more than edible, and when his gaze found Gwyn staring her cheeks blushed.

Azriel was the first to move towards them, his head dipping in acknowledgment to the girls before his eyes raked over Gwyn's form. His gaze moved down her body slowly, taking in each and every element of the gorgeous nymph. Azriel had always been attracted to Gwyneth and not just her beautiful looks but her intelligence as well. She was the only one who matched him, who challenged him in all ways, intellectually, in the ring, and all other aspects. Gwyn never failed to turn every interaction into a game.

When he finally came face to face with Gwyn he could only think of one thing to say.

“You look absolutely stunning, Gwyneth.”

A blush quickly rose on her already pink cheeks, her entire neck now heating at his compliment.

“You as well Shadow singer. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you outside of your leathers.” She smiled at him, not noticing her friends staring at the two of them. Azriels eyes slightly widened at her words, taking them in a different way.

“Not like that Az!” Gwyn laughed out. “I just meant you are always wearing your leathers, I’ve never seen you in casual clothing. It looks good.” She explained herself as the left side of his lips twitched.

“I understand Berdara.” He shook his head. He leaned over Gwen’s small form to get the bartender’s attention.

Gwen’s eyes stuck to his chest and his very prominent pecs. She turned her head to the girls before sliding out from under the shadow singer, reaching out and hugging Cassian.

“Gwinnie.” He shouted before patting her head.

“Cass.” She laughed, “Have you already had some drinks?”

“Oh absolutely, Rhys and I finished a good bit of scotch, Azzie insisted on being sober until we got here.” He continued before moving over to his wife and mate, whispering something in her ear that made her blush.

Gwyn said her hellos to the high lord before they all moved to find a booth tucked away somewhere. They all moved in, Feyre and Rhys on the innermost part, on their right were Nesta and Cassian, and on their left were Emorie and Mor, which left Gwyn and Az to sit together. He stood to the side waiting for her to slide into the booth.

She felt his gaze on her back, by now she had already finished her first drink and was feeling the effects of it. Her skin flushed with the heat of the alcohol, her grace already a bit more clumsy. Gwyneth Berdara was and always had been a lightweight.

Azriel slid in next to her, his thigh meeting hers. His shadows slid over her legs and up one of her arms, curling themselves around her as they always do in her presence. Her light giggle hit him hard. He turned his head to find her playing with the shadows as they moved all over her arms.

“Ok, shall we kick this night off with some singing?!” Mor clapped from her seat, startling Gwyn.

“Who’s first?” Feyre asked, looking around the table.

“Gwyn should go first. I’d kill to hear your voice again.” Azriel muttered the last part only loud enough for her to hear.

“Oh no, I’m already tipsy. I don't think it’d be that good.” She chuckled nervously, silently praying to the mother it wouldn’t have to be her.

“I’ll save you Gwinnie, I’ll go first. Don’t fret you’re next Gwinnie.” Cassian rumbled, trying and almost failing to stand and get out of the booth.

Cass semi-stumbled his way to the stage, asking for the projecting device and introducing himself. Rita’s erupted in cheers as Cassian started to sing a newer song about senseless love and nonsense. Something that Bryce chick had taught him.

“Gwyneth…” Azriel drew in a whisper, “Why wouldn’t you sing? You have a beautiful voice.”

“I am not nearly drunk enough to sing in front of all of these people. Maybe later tonight.” She shrugged in response, turning her head towards the shadow singer, not realizing how close he was.

“Speaking of, would you be a doll and go get me a new drink Azzie.” She mocked Cassian’s use of the nickname.

He chuckled and nodded before slipping out of the booth, walking with his head high through the crowd, power radiating off his body. When she turned back into the booth she saw Nesta and Feyre staring at her.

“What?”

“What?!” Feyre mocked. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen Azriel give this many smiles in public before.” She said, sipping on her drink.

“Oh hush, he’s just comfortable because he’s around his family.” Gwyn lied smoothly. “Plus maybe it’s just because I’m that funny” She mockingly flipped her ponytail, freezing when she felt it his something, or someone.

She turned and saw Az standing there with two drinks and a raised eyebrow looking down at her. Azriel had always towered over Gwyn but with her sitting in the low booth and him standing she was face to face with his stomach. She winced before scooting over to let him in.

“Hush.” She muttered before taking her drink out of his hand and chugging it.

“At this rate, you’ll be drunker than Cassian in no time,” Emorie spoke from her side of the table.

“Maybe I need to be so you all will be somewhat tolerable.” She replied with a thick layer of sass. Rhysand let out a deep chuckle, turning back to Feyre as they engaged in a silent conversation.

She felt a large hand run over the length of her ponytail, toying with the ends. She turned to look at the shadow singer as he stared at her.

“Can I help you?” Her eyebrow hiked up as his hand glided over the back of her neck, resting there as if it were normal.

“If I sing will you?” His deep voice asked, sending shivers through Gwen’s body.

She was speechless, Azriel had only ever sung for her once, granted his voice was beautiful, but he had said he doesn’t often do it in front of people.

“I suppose that is a fair deal. But first, since Cassian is finally done torturing the crowd with his voice let’s dance!” She clapped, standing quickly and swaying from the rush. Azriel’s scarred hands found themselves on her waist to help stabilize her. She smiled down at him before forcing everyone else to dance.

The song was something upbeat and fun, after Bryce had left to fight her war she came back with a gift, the swords, and these things called speakers that connected to one of her phones, she had also given them a large amount of batteries so it would last them while they studied the devices to replicate them. It made them all quite happy to have a new form of music, though some people were skeptical.

Gwyn grabbed Azriel’s hand and dragged him to the area of people dancing. She was a giggling, bubbly mess, and the shadow singer loved it. He had never seen her so unrestrained, save for their conversations while no one was around. Azriel cherished those conversations, he replayed them constantly in his hand, his heart fluttering at the memory of her bright smiles and sassy jokes.

With all regard abandoned Gwyneth danced, moving her body in a way that wasn’t meant to be sensual, but to the intoxicated shadow singer, was so enchanting. His shadows whispered to him about holding her ponytail around his fist as he thrust into her from behind, or about sliding the top of her dress down and watching her beautiful breast bounce. He quickly shook his head to rid himself of the thoughts and mask his scent. He didn’t used to have fantasies about Gwyn, but recently most of his nights are spent in a cold bath.

Azriel did not dance, he stood there like a guard to Gwyn, and when she noticed she stopped dancing. She moved her way to Azriel, wrapping her arms around her neck to raise herself to his ear.

“Why aren’t you dancing Azriel?” Her sultry voice spoke into his ear. Azriel stifled a groan at the sound of his name out of her mouth.

“I don’t dance, you know that Gwyneth.” He responded, placing his hands back on her hips to keep her steady.

“But Az…” she whined, dragging out the Z in his name, sending truly impure thoughts into his filthy brain.

“Gwyneth.” He spoke curtly with a voice so low she thought she might be imagining it.

He placed her on the floor before looking up, trying to regain his composure and restraint. He let go of her before walking up to the stage. He looked back at Gwyn and watched as her eyes widened as he took the amplifier.

He waited for the crowd to calm down before starting without any music.

I'd be the voice that urged Orpheus

When her body was found,

Gwyn stared at him as his beautiful voice started to sing a song she hadn’t heard before.

I'd be the choiceless hope in grief

That drove him underground,

Gwyn felt Nesta slide next to her, also completely enamored by Azriel's voice.

I'd be the dreadful need in the devotee

That made him turn around,

“How did you convince him to sing?” She whispered, barely audible, so as to not disturb the delicate song.

And I'd be the immediate forgiveness

In Eurydice.

“I didn’t.” She responded, making eye contact with Nesta as he sang the next line.

Imagine being loved by me!

Gwyn felt something pool inside of her stomach. She had spent many late nights in the bathing chambers, pleasuring herself to the thought of the shadow singer.

I won't deny I've got in my mind now all the things we'd do

So I'll try to talk refined for fear that you find out how I'm imaginin' you

Not once did Azriels gaze stray from Gwyn, not as he watched every emotion fly across her face, or as the heat rose in her cheeks at the implication of the words he sang.

He moved on to the next line as Gwyn stood there staring back at him. Suddenly, as he reached the end of the last verse, everyone else disappeared. It was just her and him as he wholeheartedly sang the words.

I won't deny I've got in my mind now all the things I would do

So I'll try to talk refined for fear that you find out how I'm imaginin' you

Azriel watched as realization flicked upon Gwyn's eyes. Her chest and neck started to flush the same color as her cheeks. The same flush he had imagined in his mind as he stared up at her from between her legs.

Gwyn's eyes flicked back over Azriels form as she realized he was single-handedly singing to her. Heat raked through her as she recalled the lyrics.

“I’ll be back Nesta.” She whispered breathlessly, turning and walking quickly to the back hall where there was an exit into the alleyway.

She rested her head against the brick wall, her heart beating wildly and her breath completely gone. She closed her eyes as she ran back through all of their interactions, screaming at herself for being so naive and blind.

She opened her eyes as she heard the door she came through open and close. Azriel was standing there, something like fear on his face as he waited for her response. All Gwyn could think to do was to walk up to him and kiss him.

Her arms flew around his neck as their kiss became hungry and passionate. Gwyn's hands found one of her thighs, pulling one leg up to his hip as he walked them so her back was against the wall. He broke the kiss, staring at her.

“Gwyneth.” He whispered.

“Azriel.” She whispered back, her lips ghosting against his. This time it was him smashing his lips to her, pushing her against the wall as one of his hands tangled itself in her ponytail.

“Wait. Gwyn, are you sure? Are you sure you want this? Us? I know I’m not the most honorable male, and I definitely don’t have a clean past.” He asked her.

“Azriel. I have wanted this since I cut that ribbon, I have wanted you since we started our training sessions and I found out just how beautiful your soul is. I don’t give a crap about your past, mine is definitely not clean. And those hands that you despise so much are the same hands that saved me, the same hands that taught me how to defend myself and reclaim my power, and hopefully the same hands that will make me cum.” She stared up at him as his hands flexed against her skin.

“Thank fucking gods, we can have a more meaningful conversation later, right now I just need to kiss you. Is that ok?” Before his sentence was fully out of his mouth Gwyn was nodding.

Azriel continued their kiss, pulling her leg tighter around his hips. The hand that was in her hair came down to her other thigh and tapped at it, signaling for her to jump. They were both breathless as they broke the kiss.

“Thank you, Gwyn.” He whispered, staring into her beautiful blue eyes.

“For what?”

“For showing me that I’m not ruined.” He smiled at her, a wide bright smile that carried across his whole face.

That damned dress.

~~~~

Note: I think this concept was so cute!!! I love writing Gwyriel!! Don’t worry I didn’t forget about the fics I promised!! They are coming, this was just my contribution to Gwynriel weeks!!

@gwynrielweeksofficial (their first kiss!!))

Taglist:

@littlelunatica @going-through-shit @annaaaaa88 @i-am-infinite @impossibelle

[jade-parcels]

Modern au careers

For Kaeya, Jean, Zhongli, Ningguang and Venti

Something quick between longer posts!

Kaeya:

Kaeya would totally rock being a police officer you can’t convince me otherwise

He and Diluc went though the academy together. Diluc dropped out and took another career path which left Kaeya feeling kinda betrayed cause they were going to be awesome cops together! That was the plan :/ oh well

He’d excel in the police academy, he’s physically fit and fast which makes it easy for him to go through training

He won’t be a captain/commander for a long time since that’s a high position that takes years of testing and promotions to get to so for now let’s just settle for officer

He loves being out on the road doing real police work! There are plenty of times where he has to sit at his desk to write reports which he doesn’t exactly enjoy but oh well, it comes with the job

He won’t be promoted for awhile since he’s only 23 but man oh man, he’s been on the job for 2 years and he already has the best stories of chases, public interactions and just general stories about messing around back at the station

Kaeya isn’t exactly supposed to but when the K9 is in the building, he’ll neglect his work to go play with the dog :’)

He doesn’t have a long term plan, he’s taking things one step at a time and loving every minute of it

Jean:

She’s also a police officer, she ranked very high in the academy and graduated the year before Kaeya! They work at the same station

Jean and Kaeya work together a lot! They are even partners most of the time! They have a lot of laughs but Jean is really the one keeping Kaeya in charge

Her goal is to be the chief of police one day! The first female chief in a looooong time

She takes her paperwork seriously, she almost never makes mistakes. Additionally, she patrols populated areas so citizens will see her face and she can chat with people! She wants them to trust her! And she wants to learn about the people she has sworn to protect

There are female bosses above her who she really looks up to and aims to impress! She hopes they’ll be the ones to promote her too :)

After her long shifts she’s always happy to come home to her sister Barbara to tell her alllll about what she did at work that day! She’s Barbara’s biggest role model so Jean strives to do her best at work in order to come home to tell Barbara all about it

Barbara has her mom drop her off at the police station on the weekends to bring lunch for Jean! They eat together in the break room away from everyone else to catch up! Jean also helps Barbara with her schoolwork when she can :) she’s a great older sister

Zhongli:

A history professor who looks....really good for his age

He’s 40 but he doesn’t look a day over 25, all of his students either want to date him or hate the way he drawls on for hours

He’s super qualified for his job, he’s studied in China, Japan, Russia and Italy, he knows pretty much everything anyone would need to know about history

He specializes in Chinese history though and even teaches a Chinese history course for honors students who are truly interested in the subject

Zhongli is super patient with his students though he can be strict when he needs to be. If he sees them falling behind he’ll meet with them after class in order to figure things out “if you need more time to finish these papers, I can give that time to you. However, I would hope you take these seriously. Education is important. Not only that but you paid to take this class, I’d hate to see you fail...’

Zhongli is a father of two, Xiao and Ganyu and failure in school is not an option for either of them lmao Zhongli helps them with every subject. Failing math? He’ll get a tutor. Failing english? Don’t worry, he’s multilingual and will help. Failing science? He’ll stay up all night watching videos about chem or bio in order to reteach it to his kids the next day.

He loves his kids very much...he has tons of pictures of them on his desk at work and he constantly gets notifications saying he’s almost out of storage on his phone lmao

Ningguang:

M’lady <3

Ms. Ningguang is a super successful businesswoman. She is super into the stock exchange, she is constantly buying and selling stocks

She is also the CEO of a luxury makeup brand. She took over the position and turned the basic, bland brand into something truly special

She’s been on the cover of many magazines all over the world with her success story! She went from wandering the streets as an orphan to a wealthy businesswoman.

Ningguang has a gorgeous house and two, luxurious sports cars. Dayum...You go girl!!!!

She sponsors multiple orphanages and plans on adopting kids when she settles down a little cause she is constantly on the move, she doesn’t have time for a kid right now...though she would love to be a mother :’)

Venti:

Venti has multiple jobs and his additional job history is hilarious to look at because this man gets bored too easily!! So he’ll just...quit spontaneously

He’s had 3 past jobs as a bartender and got fired from all 3 for excessive drinking, he worked at a dog shelter for a month and quit because a dog puked on his shoe, he was a receptionist for a dentist’s office and was fired for yelling at an old lady (she deserved it though!!), he worked at a Target for 4 months and quit because his coworkers gave him too much stuff to do (they did not but he felt like they did)

He’s really done everything!! He has plenty of good stories to tell at the bar with his buddies!

Now he’s a songwriter. Well, he’s been a songwriter for a long time but now it’s official

But being a songwriter isn’t exactly...profitable for him yet. So he’s holding down 3 jobs. A Starbucks barista, a KFC cook and a Khols cashier. He’ll get you that sweet, sweet khols cash baby!

Is he successful? No, not yet but he will be!! Hopefully!! He makes a lot of money when he sings at bars or restaurants so he has a lot of faith in himself!

Venti is the definition of a free spirit so who knows what he’ll be doing in a month from now!! He sure as hell doesn’t know lmao

[tellywoodtrash]

immj2 19.04.21 lb

here's what you "missed" (lbr tho, not watching tellywood is not called MISSING, it's called "FREEDOM") last week on this shitshow:

kabir pehla mauka dekh ke vatttt liya. #livefree my love.

kiara died the most inglorious death - forcefed a peanut butter milkshake.

riddhima as per usual, the moment someone drops dead in their vicinity, turned to vansh and was like:

ghar mein saaaaare 90s bachche start playing CID-CID. kaabil detectives watching this bs like......

besttttt part is that none of these dumbasses are ANYYYYYYYYYY closer to opening the damn black box than they were 2 weeks ago.

meanwhile someone keeps threatening riddhima ki they're gonna tell vansh the whole 6 hours secret. ho hum. sansaaaar ko khatam ho jaana hai lekin yeh manhoos raaz nahi khulna.

aslkdjaslkdjlsakjdlaskjd anu mom and her new-found spirituality and daily meditation is actually sending me.

mummyji being super helpful and telling riddhima ki dadi has the torch now. love how the whollllllle family is just playing passing the parcel with this thing, getting their grubby fingerprints all over it, as if it's NOT A VALUABLE PIECE OF EVIDENCE IN A MURDER.

dadi meanwhile is burning a hole in her phone screen staring at kiara's tattoo. bachchon se leke buddhon tak sabne isko ghoora hai, lekin majaal hai, inmein se ek ko bhi kuch samajh aaya ho. why can't y'all just accept that maybe it means nothing, it's just one of those dumb foreign language tattoos, that probably say "ek plate gobi manchurian" or some shit.

riddhima's here asking for the torch and dadi is just like BHAKKKKK NIKAL YAHAAN SE while having flashbacks to brandishing the mashaal like some crazyass charlotesville nazi.

another flower delivery for riddhima that vansh is receiving at the door, and sis loses it. runs like PT USHA and grabs the flowers and note outta his hand thinking it's another threat and tears it up.

vansh here like:

but also she cut her hand so ofc he's using mauka to suck on her finger. MAN IN THESE CORONA TIMES, Y'ALL REALLY KILLING ME WITH THIS GANDAAAAAA NON HYGENIC BEHAVIOURRRR.

lmao the bouquet was from vansh, as an apology (for what? no like, we've lost count of all the shit you do on an hourly basis, so which exact thing are you saying sorry for right now????)

also what adbhut new way of being pregnant is this that the immj2 ladies have cracked, ki inka itnaaaaaa se bhi pait nahi nikalta????

anyway, some blah blah cutesy romance bakchodi that no one has time for. i liked it better when y'all were constantly horny.

angre as usual here with some manhoos khabar that has vansh frowning and storming away.

police aayi hai. excuse you, we don't recognize any cops here but our one and only KABIR. HAIN KAHAN HUMAARA LADKA??? MISSING HO RAHI HAI YAAR?!?!!!? KYUN LAGA RAKHA HAI FALTU KA YEH SHOW WITHOUT THE BEST CHARACTER THAT EXISTS IN IT?

anyway police is like we heard there was a murder here, and vansh is like huh whaaa here no??? no dead ppl here, no sir. you may leave. police waale bhaiyya is like bhak chutiye, aise thodi hota hai, warrant laaye hain, hatt saamne se.

angre taking out a rolled up carpet, a trick outta the vihaan book. but it's too small to have anything rolled up in it, so.......

doesn't stop the police from making a big deal of searching it though, while vansh side mein se taane maarta hai. waise bhai kaaafi good mood mein hai aaj kal. looks like someone's been taking their meds these days.

riddhima just randomly falling down behind them. like..... ???????

this police is literally too dumb to function. THEY CAME WITH A WARRANT TO SEARCH THE WHOLE HOUSE, JUST LOOKED INSIDE THIS ONE ROLLED CARPET (THAT TOO AFTER GETTING DISTRACTED BY RIDDHIMA'S RANDOM GIRRNA) AND WERE LIKE OK DONE THERE'S NOTHING HERE BYE. LMAO WHAT THE HELL, MY CAT PLAYS HIDE AND SEEK WITH MORE FOCUS AND PURPOSE THAN THIS.

husband wife and anu mom giggling over how riansh ke do takke ka pyaar is enough to chutiya banaofy everyone. kya hi bakwaaas.

the slightest of movement and vansh is dizzy. lol is he severely anemic like me???? join the club, bitch. we have iron supplements.

oh boy, cut to a while later and bro don't look too good. he's still smiling at riddhima's banter and all, but.......... idk man, he looks like he's having a daura of some sort.

riddhima's amazing medical knowledge (or just plain common sense???) finally kicks in and she's like, u ok dude? imma call a doc. and he's like nooooooo i'm fiiiiiiiiiiiine. ok whatever. maro apne iss stupid secret container room office mein. bewakoof.

ISKE BEECH MEIN BHI ROMANCE. BHAAD MEIN JAO YAAR TUM LOG.

asldkjaslkdjlaskdjlaskdj angre ne laash ko vyom ke ghar rakh diya. as if there aren't enough creepy things lying around in there in the first place.

ok vansh seems to be getting real breathless and sickly.

meanwhile idhar angre is doing some kinda depraved play with kiara's laash and........... man everyone in this show is a fucking psychopath.

also it's now been like 3, 4 days since the chick died and ..................... body's not smelling ripe yet?

vansh coughing his way through opening that stupid orange coloured black box and.......... abbe chutiye, zinda rahoge toh khol paoge?????????

anyway the tattoo code whatever only has 5 digits and he needs 6 and meanwhile anu mom has come yelling about how siya's gone missing. great. ek pallllllll ka chain nahi is pagal-khaane mein.

find some letter in her room. vansh's coughing is getting worse and worse. bro, time to get a covid test.

at least siya was helpful enough to tell everyone she's going to saste!bhaiyya.

asli bhaiyya is understandably very very upset. and thus coughing and huffing puffing even more. SOMEONE TAKE THIS DUDE TO A DOCTOR THIS IS GETTING DISTRESSING TO WATCH OML.

anu mom toh is full-on ignoring vansh actively dying in front of her rn and is like OH GOD SIYA KAHIN KOI "NAADAAANI" MEIN ZINDAGI KHARAAB NAA KAR BAITHE (meaning: OMG VIRGINITY KHATRE MEIN HAIIIIII!!!!!!!!)

riddhima is like dude you're not fucking ok and he's still like I'M FINE I'M JUST WORRIED FOR SIYA. idk man i'd be more worried about your obviously failing phepdein and dil than your sister's hymen, but that's just me i guess.

riddhima is calling vyom and threatening him, and nothing gets vyom hornier than being threatened, so ofc, bhai mood mein hai.

vyom, unlike all other tellywood baddies (and even goodies), is a big believer in consent. good on him. 10 points to him over every other chutiya man in this show.

he's informing her about how vansh thikaane lagaofied the laash at his place. oufffffff, y'all need to respect poor dead kiara instead of just shuffling her body back and forth like this. uski aatma tum logon ke upar mandaraaayegi, dekhna.

riddhima's like idc about all this i just want siya to be safe and he's like too late babe. sardi, khaasi, na malaria hua; humko love love love loveriaaaaa huaaaa.

vyom's like siya aayi apni marzi se hai, par jaayegi meri marzi se. guess he don't believe in consent so much anymore. (revokes the 10 points i gave hm earlier. also taking away 50 points for this uglyass suit. bhai tu shirt utar, wohi behtar hai.)

vansh has now progressed to coughing like the people from the pre-movie anti-tobacco ads now.

hides the orange black box in yet another secret room hidden behind some panel, where all the raisinghania wealth is hoarded like pirate's booty in all these crates. y'all crazy, its 2021, put that shit in offshore bank accounts you dumbasses.

anyway he tells angre all this shit kaafi detail mein, and lord idk how angre ke neeyat doesn't phisalofy to just off this fucker and take over the whole thing himself. zero ambition this boy has. ishani hoti isske jagah, toh pakka karti. precap: riddhima trying to console vansh about siya; vyom being a creepy ass monologuing loser as per usual; vansh pays a visit to vyom exuding hella lotta sexy energy.

[spooky-z]

College Françoise Dupont’s talent show [5/5]

• 1 • 2 • 3 • 4 • 4.1 • 5 • 5.1 •

Warning: suicide mention at the final

@ozmav @maribat-archive

Damian was not one bit happy with the wistful eyes of Adrien for Marinette.

Since the confrontation with the class, Wayne noticed that the blonde did not take the eyes of his bride. Perhaps he was not even blinking. He could barely see the boy breathing!

“Damian, control your temper.” Tim nudged him. “Looks like you’re going to jump the golden boy’s neck anytime.”

They were sitting in the auditorium, lights on, people searching their seats. The whole family sitting in the third row of the main set of chairs, occupying the entire row.

The order being from the far left starting with Alfred, Bruce, Dick, Kori, Jason, Tim, Damian, Sabine, Tom, Chloe, Kagami, Allan, Allegra and Claude.

Jagged and Penny had been taken into the cabin, accompanied by Chloe’s parents and Kagami’s mother.

Adrien and the rest of the class, sitting in the second row. The blonde standing right in front of him, not disguising the fact that he was facing Marinette, who was on stage talking quietly with Felix and the director.

“If he doesn’t stop eating her with his eyes, I’ll…” and clenched his fist, imagining Agreste’s head in the middle of it.

Sabine, who had heard the exchange, laughed softly. Her son-in-law was so cute.

“Honey, it’s like we say: they may look, but they can’t have it,” she says, her hand on Damian’s fist. “My daughter looks beautiful. If no one looked at her twice, I would have been offended on her behalf.”

He bites his lip in conflict, but seems to decide that his mother-in-law was right and looked away from the blonde, preferring the sight of his angel.

“Good evening everyone.” The director says in the microphone, Marinette and Felix at his right side, microphones in their hands. “Today we mark the end of the talent week and also the end of the semester.” He pauses with the sound of the applause “this week was indeed amazing. Many talents discovered; many laughs obtained. It was wonderful.“

The audience shouts in agreement. Damian frowns with the particularly high-pitched scream in his ear and glances quickly at Tim.

“Today, as you can see, I have two guests with me” the director says again “Marinette Dupain-Cheng-”

“Hello!” Marinette sings into the microphone, a sweet smile on her face.

“-And Felix Aguillard.” Felix bows to the audience “Our first graders of the year.” More applause.

At the sound of the applause, Damian was able to hear a loud "What ?!” coming from the row in front of him, but could not recognize the voice because of the noise.

“It’s been a year since they’ve been studying at both Dupont and a prestigious university.” General choke “Marinette at ESMOD and Felix at INSEAD-”

“WHAT?!” Lila shouts in surprise, cutting off the director. She sits up quickly when she realizes that she has lost control in front of everyone. “Sorry, I was just surprised.”

Chloe scoffs before shouting to the stage “THAT’S MY GIRL!”

Marinette laughs “And Fe? He’s your boy too, isn’t he?” Teases into the microphone.

Felix looks at her, the pained expression on his face.

Chloe scowls at them and screams once again, “I’m sorry, but I’m SUPER GAY.” And the audience laughs out loud at the antics. The director looks unsure of what to do.

“Ahem,” he catches everyone’s attention, the laughter calming down. “Continuing what I was saying- Today marks their last high school day, so nothing fairer than them being our special guests of the night. The two will open for today’s participants, but they will not be part of the competition.” And ends, waving to the two talk something before they begin.

Felix shakes his head, saying he doesn’t want to say anything and follows him off the stage, but Marinette takes the lead, microphone tight in her hands.

“Good evening everyone.” She says, “Like Principal Damocles said, my name is Marinette. Marinette Dupain-Cheng and I want a little of your time.” Her eyes gauge each of the audience, not stopping at anyone for long.

“Today has been a particularly special day for me.” It starts “But I’ll start with last month. Last month I was able to go a step further in my career. I received an undeniable proposal and now my things must be arriving at Gotham, my old and new residence.” She notices some violent reactions in the ranks of her former class. Alya. “Today… today I was proposed by the man I love. Today I have friends supporting me, I have my family by my side, I’m having you all now.” Her slightly wet eyes, Damian notes, wanting more than anything to be by her side right now.

“But it wasn’t always like that.” His tone a little bitter. “There was a time, like, about three years ago, that I had people in my life that I thought were there to support me. To be my friends. To support me when I’m not well…” she sighs “But I was wrong. So wrong.”

“I came to such a low point, so dark, that time has stopped. Like this. I had lost my will, my motivation. I was alive but not living.” Sabine, who had been holding back tears, could no longer and cried silently “But hey! This is not a sad story. It’s not because I found good people. Great friends. A great boyfriend. It was not easy at first. There have been relapses. Days I wanted to do nothing more than sleep and sleep. But I did it.” She winked at Lila, who seemed to have eaten something bad.

“I’m reaching my goals. Saying goodbye to most of you, see you soon to others and a ‘I hope I never have to see you again’ for the ones left.” She says sweet, so sweet that her teeth hurt.

“It was thinking about this past, this dark spot of my life, that I wrote a song … Yeah! I know! You were expecting a fashion show, but here I am, ready to sing.” Jokes with the general surprise.

She looks at the side edge of the stage. Luka was waiting for the signal to be able to enter. She blinks at him and he smiles, the guitar positioned in his hands.

“To sing this song I would need support, so a friend volunteered for this role.” She turns to the audience. “Please, a round of applause for Luka Couffaine, my best friend.”

///

Alya was… She didn’t know how she was feeling at that moment.

She had stopped trying to understand what had been going on since Chloe had appeared with Kagami two nights ago to pick up Marinette at the theater.

That was so frustrating! How, when … The three had become friends. How Marintte could forgive Chloe. When Marinette had overcome her rivalries with Kagami.

Alya didn’t understand. Alya didn’t know.

Alya didn’t remember when it was the last time she’d talked to Marinette. Her best friend.

But she remembered the last time she’d screamed at the brunette about being mean. About how after so many years, she still hasn’t gotten over her jealousy of Lila. How Adrien would never love her if she continued this behavior.

She remembered the teary blueberries, the flushed cheeks (of shame or anger she didn’t know) and the weak voice asking to leave her alone.

But it wasn’t her fault! She just wanted the brunette to grow up, take her head off the Adrien world, and live. Give Lila a chance.

What did not happen. Marinette just walked away.

She would come to school, attend classes, and then disappear. No one knew where she was going at breaks. During classes, she hardly interacted with others.

Just Chloe.

And Alya still couldn’t understand. Didn’t understand what Marinette was saying on that stage. Didn’t know what she was talking about. She was trying. Really. But it was all in vain to see Luka Couffaine come on stage.

His slightly longer, unruly hair combed anyway, torn black jeans, shiny boots, and a black T-shirt under a mossy green leather jacket. A guitar in his arms.

His eyes wrapped in a thick layer of khol.

He bent slightly toward Marinette’s microphone, a polite smile on his lips.

“Good night, Dupont. I’m Luka and I’m here today to help Minette in one or two songs.” He says “God knows how bad she is with the guitar.” He laughs when Marinette jokes him playfully.

She takes his microphone and says again "I think we should start, what do you think ?!”

A projector screen descends behind them and they begin.

No, I think I’ll stay in tonight

Skip the conversations and the “Oh, I’m fines”

No, I’m no stranger to surprise

This paper town has let me down too many times

And, man. She was good.

Alya was surprised, scared even.

Why do I even try? Give me a reason why

I thought that I could trust you, never mind

Why all the switching sides? Where do I draw the line?

I guess I’m too naive to read the signs

Adrien shifted uncomfortably beside Nino. His gravelly face.

He was sure the music was for them, the class.

For him.

I’m just lookin’ for some real friends

The screen behind them began to pass photos.

Photos of Marinette that no one in the class had ever seen before.

All they ever do is let me down

Every time I let somebody in

The first photo to appear contained Luka and Marinette hugging each other. Her arms around his neck, their cheeks glued together and his arms around her waist.

The unknown background landscapes. The sun shining bright.

Luka was wearing only a black T-shirt, his hair a mess and the tongue sticking out. Marinette in a black cropped with blue accents, her hair in a bun, eyes closed and a huge smile.

She looked so happy.

Adrien cringed.

Then I find out what they’re all about

I’m just lookin’ for some real friends

In the next picture, Chloe and the brunette were sleeping together on a futon, probably in Mari’s room.

Chloe wearing Ladybug pajamas being the small spoon and Marinette Abeille being the big spoon.

Alya tasted the blood.

Wonder where they’re all hidin’ out

I’m just lookin’ for some real friends

Gotta get up out of this town

In the third photo, Marinette was sitting on Kagami’s lap while they were taking selfies. The two making funny faces.

Kagami’s hands steady around Marinette.

And that was a shock to Nino.

The ice queen being funny and protective of someone.

Oh, oh

Oh, ah

A picture of the four of them together at a sleepover in what looked like Chloe’s room. Luka had a face mask, Chloe’s hair stuck in bobs, Kagami painting her nails, and Marinette reading a fashion magazine.

All of them on the bedroom floor, sweets and snacks spread and a television on in a black and white film.

The photo was taken by a fifth unknown person.

I stay up, talkin’ to the moon

Been feelin’ so alone in every crowded room

Can’t help but feel like something’s wrong, yeah

'Cause the place I’m livin’ in just doesn’t feel like home

This time it was a video of Marinette in what looked like a kitchen. A huge kitchen. Wearing a black shirt too big to be hers, probably making breakfast.

She had a spatula in her hand, distracted, using it as a microphone while singing something.

The man who had arrived with Bruce Wayne, the one with the black and white hair, joins her singing. They start dancing like crazy around the kitchen.

The video ends with him slipping and falling, Marinette laughing out loud before falling too.

It didn’t even last 20 seconds.

I’m just lookin’ for some real friends

All they ever do is let me down

Every time I let somebody in

Then I find out what they’re all about

Another video came, this time Marinette is sitting on the grass, surrounded by puppies. Two Great Dane resting their heads on her lap while she pats them.

Damian Wayne joins her and she rests against him.

He looks at the person filming and the filming quickly ends.

I’m just lookin’ for some real friends

Wonder where they’re all hidin’ out

I’m just lookin’ for some real friends

Gotta get up out of this town

The next picture had Marinette in a gym, leggings, black top, hair in a ponytail.

Another of the men who came in with Bruce Wayne, on her shoulders like a sack of potatoes.

She was all skinny muscle.

Nino heard Adrien choke and cough.

I just wanna talk about nothin’

With somebody that means somethin’

Spell the names of all our dreams and demons

For the times that I don’t understand

Marinette this time was in the same kitchen (video), an old man beside her watching her beat the dough in the bowl.

The crowded bench with Damian, Bruce and the other three men, Chloe, Kagami, Luka and… Félix?!

Tell me what’s the point of a moon like this

When I’m alone again

Can I run away to somewhere beautiful

Where nobody knows my name?

There was a joint gagging of class with the pool photo.

Damian felt jealous boil again.

I’m just lookin’ for some real friends

All they ever do is let me down

I let somebody in

But I find out what they’re all about

The next photo had Jagged Stone, Penny Rolling, Clara Nightingale, Prince Ali, and XY at a picnic. All dressed informally, looking comfortable, smiling at Marinette who was playing with Fang in the background.

And that’s how Ms. Bustier’s class seemed to remember that Jagged didn’t have a cat but a crocodile.

I’m just lookin’ for some real friends

All they ever do is let me down

I’m just lookin’ for some real friends

Gotta get up out of this town, yeah

The last picture was of everyone together.

Dupain-Cheng, Waynes, Chloe, Kagami, Luka, Felix, Claude, Allegra, Allan, Jagged, Penny, Clara, Ali, XY. Even Fang and the Great Danes.

Everyone was looking at the camera, smiling excitedly. Marinette in Damian’s arms and a banner with “Joyeux anniversaire, Marinette” in the background.

Oh, oh

Oh, ah

Marinette and Luka ended the song’s last chord when a video, this time with sound, played on the big screen.

“… Let me hear you say, this shit is bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S!”

Marinette turns horrified to the big screen.

“This shit is bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S!” Marinette on the big screen screams along with the music.

The girl throws her arms up, jumping on the bed. The Batman themed pajamas.

“Oh my god, Minette…” the recording person laughs softly so the girl doesn’t hear.

Marinette continues to scream the lyrics, unaware that she is being recorded, until the recording person starts laughing out loud and she gets scared.

“… Jason?” She has a confused expression on her face until she notices the camera and her face becomes homicidal. “Were you recording…?”

The man seems to be scared because the laughter soon dies.

“… No?” he tries.

“Really? So, you don’t mind me taking a look at your phone, do you?” She gets off the bed and goes toward him.

“… Listen, I think Alfred is calling me. Bye!” He runs from her, but doesn’t finish recording.

With him running, the phone only films the confused shapes of the house, but everyone is still able to hear Marinette running after him.

“BACK HERE TODD!”

"NOT! I DON’T WANT TO DIE AGAIN!”

Shooting continues for another two seconds and then ends abruptly.

Luka was laughing openly on stage, Marinette still with her back to the audience, blushing embarrassed and the audience laughing.

And that was how the last night of the Talent Show began.

///

Lila was waiting for her at the backstage.

Marinette knew that an hour would have to face the girl, but did not think she would attack in such an open and public place.

But objectively, this was the only chance she had, since Marinette was leaving Paris that night.

“Should I congratulate you on the engagement, Dupain-Cheng? Or should we talk about your poor attempt to come out on top?” Lila scoffs, the smugness on her face. “Because it didn’t work. They are still eating in the palm of my hand.”

Marinette sighs already tired.

"What do you want, Lila?”

“I just came to brag. I like to throw salt on the wound.”

“That’s good! Because I like it too.” Marinette says, her tone becoming sharp. “Do you really think I would go away and do nothing to unmask you, Lila Rossi?” Lila stiffens the smile. “Or rather, Volpina, the accomplice of Hawkmoth.”

The girl steps back as Marinette approaches.

"What are you talking about?” She countered. “Are you going crazy?”

“Crazy? I? No.” Marinette laughs “I just think it’s funny that you think there would be no consequences helping a terrorist. And no use denying, I know you have been helping Hawkmoth and Mayura all these years. Your best friend, Ladybug, told me.”

The two do not notice Adrien, Nino and Alya coming. Adrien, noticing the situation, prevents Alya from trying to help Lila and forces them both to hear the conversation hidden behind some wood panels.

“… So, what if I helped Hawkmoth?” They hear Lila say. Adrien feels his blood run cold. “I was a minor. A child. You have nothing against me.”

There is a break and Marinette respond.

“That’s where you’re wrong Lila. Gabriel Agreste may have been arrested and refused to speak, but the evidence, Lila, speaks for itself.” Her firm voice “One year, Lila. A year gathering evidence against you and look, I was surprised to learn that I wasn’t the only person you emotionally abused.”

“… What?” Lila whispers looking scared.

“Emilia Shawn’s suicide.” Marinette’s voice comes out like lightning. “Don’t you remember her, Lila? The girl you bullied so much she couldn’t stand and threw herself off the roof of your school in Italy?” Alya was crying on Nino’s shoulder.

“No problem you don’t remember Emilia!” Marinette says very cheerfully “As long as you remember Cassandra. Or Phillip. Marie… Rico.”

“How do you… how do you know those names?” Lila shouts.

“Because unlike you and our lovely classmates, Lila, families didn’t believe their children were abusive monsters and committed suicide because they were sorry.”

There are footsteps, Adrien gets up enough to see what was going on and recognizes Agent Raincomprix with the National Police, surrounding Marinette and Lila.

Damian Wayne appears along with Bruce Wayne alongside Marinette.

“You cannot do that! I was just a child! Children make mistakes!” Lila begins to freak out when she realizes the situation.

“No, Lila. This is murder and terrorism. And you will pay for what you did.” Marinette says.

Damian hugs the brunette in support and she squeezes his arms in thanks.

"Lila Aloisi Rossi, you are arrested for accomplice of murder and terrorism.” The Raincomprix agent says as he holds Lila in handcuffs “You have the right to remain silent. Whatever you say can and will be used against you.”

"What? NO! LET ME GO!” Lila shouts, going crazy as she struggles.

The police soon have to help the agent contain her and before they leave, he turns to Marinette and the Waynes.

“Bruce Wayne, Marinette. Thanks for your help.” He nods. “It’s up to us now.” And leaves.

“Thank you mr. Raincomprix.” Marinette says.

"I’ll go with you guys,” Bruce says and joins the agents.

Meanwhile, Lila was still screaming and kicking through the theater corridors, people leaving to find out what was going on.

Ms. Bustier’s whole class watching.

“YOU HAVE TO UNLEASH ME! I HAVE DIPLOMATIC IMMUNITY!” She shouted.

Bruce Wayne, who was right behind the National Police surrounding Lila, looked smug when he spoke.

“Your country has withdrawn your immunity after we have presented the evidence of your crimes, Lila Rossi.” Lila widened her eyes, the panic evident. “You will face justice in full rights.”

Damian believes that all of Paris was able to hear the scream that the Italian gave.

He turned the woman in his arms, needing to look her in the eye.

“It’s over, angel.” He whispers to her, noticing the tear in her eyes.

Marinette sighs, relaxing against him.

“It’s over, Dami. Ended.“

[tag list]

@mystery-5-5 @spicybelladonna @iglowinggemma28 @crazylittlemunchkin@lunaraquaenby @maude-zarella @mooshoon @kuroko26@littleredrobinhoodlum @fanboy7794 @shadowberrybinch @k-rena-k@captainmac6 @clumsy-owl-4178  @tazanna-blythe @vixen-uchiha @zebrabaker @chloe-bourgeois-is-big-gay @artxyra @ellerahs @minightrose@redscarlet95 @soaringowlsstuff @xxkelsey39

[squirrelacorngliterfarts]

Blood. 38.

“brothers, this is my decision. we refuse to share power with any of the other kings and earls, whoever they are, or however powerful they are. least of all, my brothers, king harald finehair and his brother, for they are dedicated to our overthrow. is that understood?” bjorn asks, pacing the docs back and forth as he speaks with his youngest siblings.

all of them, except his sister.

she had not been seen since yesterday, she was cooped up in her room all last night and this morning with a slave girl she had taken a liking to, thorin, bjorn thought her name was.

“we are all equally ragnar’s sons, but we are not equal in battle. so, i will take the lead. i will establish the battle plans, and i will give the orders. do you understand that?” bjorn asks once more, and he notices a look pass over ivar’s face.

“you don’t agree, ivar?”.

ivar looks up into his older brother’s eyes, giving him a smile that was clearly plastered on.

“i didn’t say anything” ivar replies innocently, but bjorn shakes his head.

“you don’t have to. your age makes you believe you know more than you do” bjorn says, but ivar scoffs.

“explain (y/n) then, hmm? she is my age, maybe a bit younger”.

“(Y/n) listens, she takes in information, she is not stubborn or bullheaded when it comes to matters such as this, she does not want to be the leader of this army, or any army” bjorn says, feeling guilt arise in his gut as he thought about yesterday’s shared words with her.

ubbe looks at his brother for a moment, silently telling him they needed to speak about her later.

“but what do you know? what have you done? what battles have you won and what battles have you lost? for it is in failure, my brothers, that this is where we learn the most” bjorn says, looking righteous and proud as he spoke confidently to his brothers.

“really?” ivar says sarcastically, and that doesn’t sit right with bjorn.

“you don’t want to listen, that is your choice. but i am the leader of this great army. me! and you will obey me. and if you do so, my brothers, revenge for our father.......will be ours” bjorn finishes, crouching down to ivar’s level, eyeing him with a fierce glare that made ivar go silent.

ivar knew he wasn’t going to get anywhere with his brother, so he’d just have to wait to get his moment.

hvitserk looked to the sun, looking for the time, and he takes one final look around.

“where is (y/n)?, shouldn’t she be here by now?”.

“i do not know, brother” ubbe says, washing his face, spitting, and clearing his nostrils in the water basin below him, tossing the used water into the ocean beside him “maybe she changed her mind”.

ivar’s brows cinch together, there’s no way she’d miss out on this, he knew her like the back of his hand, she never went a day without talking to him, and that worried him to the core.

he wished he could have been there that night, the night she had hurt herself, he should have been there. maybe that wouldn’t have happened.

he’d have to speak with her about it.......if she’d ever show up.

“we’re getting ready to leave-” hvitserk stopped speaking, his eyes widening as he stared behind his brother’s heads.

“what? what is it?” sigurd asked, trying to snap him out of his daze.

hvitserk jerked his chin in the direction he was fixated on, and his brothers all looked, and were stunned silent.

there was (Y/n) helping a man carry a large crate, her body clad in, not a dress, but black fitted pants, boots that tied all the way up to mid calf, a breast plate that was covered by a leather vest. a sword adorning her side.

her eyes were colored khol, her hair was no longer long, but cut, just resting above her shoulders with braids that kept it back from her face.

she gives the man a smile, before looking to her brothers, hopping up on the doc.

“are we ready?”.

the boys don’t say anything for a moment, but bjorn was the first one to speak.

“are you?”.

she gives him a smile, nodding.

“of course, i just have a few goodbyes to give”.

bjorn nods, knowing he has to do the same.

he pats her on the shoulder as he passes her, giving her one last look before jumping off the doc and onto shore.

her brothers still haven’t said a word.

she shrugs.

“what?”.

ubbe clears his throat.

“you.......look-”.

“gorgeous” ivar finishes, making (y/n) smile, and look down at her appearance.

“i couldn’t have my hair getting in the way” she mumbles, moreso to herself than them.

“ivar is right” hvitserk says “you look beautiful”.

ubbe smiles at her giving her confirmation.

she was gorgeous, stunning, all of the above, but it just wasn’t her.

he sighs, taking a stand and walking over to her, giving her a kiss on her forehead.

“sweet baby sister” ubbe mutters, closing his eyes for a moment before he too, leaves the doc to say goodbye.

“i hate to admit it, but i am glad you are here” sigurd says, and (Y/n) laughs, walking over to him and ruffling his hair.

“are you nervous? to leave kattegat?” sigurd asks, and (Y/n) stays quiet for a moment.

she was nervous, but this was always something she had wanted to do since she was a small child.

just not in this circumstance.

but, her answer? was-

“no. i am ready to go, to avenge father”.

ivar smiles, patting the seat next to him, making her smile back and take his offer.

ivar continues to stare at her, and she finally has to say something.

“what? why are you staring?” (y/n) asks laughing, and ivar laughs as well.

“you just look so beautiful” ivar says, letting his fingers brush against her newly cut hair, allowing his fingers to wander of her jaw.

“thank you, ivar” (y/n) says gently, and the two look into each other’s eyes for a moment longer, ivar can’t help but let his forehead rest on hers.

“(y/n)?”.

they all turn their heads and see thorin standing there, looking bashful under the eyes of ivar and sigurd.

“hello my princes” she greets, making them smile back and nod. “may i please speak with you? (y/n)?”.

“of course” (Y/n) says, standing up, giving ivar one last lingering touch on the underside of his jaw.

(y/n) grabs thorin and pulls her into her side as they walk.

“what is it?” (Y/n) asks, and thorin smiles, grabbing something from out of her sachal that rest on her side.

“i thought you’d want this before you go” thorin says, pulling out a long necklace that had jewels along the chain, one large teal gemstone at the center.

(Y/n) is stunned, staring at the necklace with reddening eyes.

her mother’s necklace.......

“where.......where did you get this?” (Y/n) asks, gingerly taking it from thorins open palms.

“i found it when i was cleaning her room. it was under her pillow” thorin explains, and (y/n) swallows the thick rock that had formed in her throat.

it was the necklace aslaug was wearing the day she married ragnar, it was the necklace she had worn when she had given birth to all her children.......it was the necklace she was wearing the day ragnar had brought (Y/n) home.

(Y/n) clutches the jewelry tight in her palm, raising her tear filled eyes to meet thorin’s.

“thank you, thorin, thank you” (Y/n) says, pulling the young girl into a tight embrace.

thorin hugs back just as tight, and the two girls realize they would miss each other deeply.

“be safe” thorin whispers.

“you, too” (Y/n) replies, pulling back from the girl and wiping her tears away before anyone noticed.

the two girls share one last smile, before (y/n) takes her place back on the doc beside ivar.

ivar wraps his arm around her waist as she examines the necklace, swiftly putting it around her neck.

she tucks it under her shirt, before looking up and seeing someone standing along the cliffside.

torvi, and her children, staring down at her.

torvi looked as if she were aching, aching to come and say something, anything to her.

but she wouldn’t, and (Y/n) was glad.

she does give torvi and small smile, and gently waves her hand.

but torvi doesn’t do anything back, her children do, but she does not.

the horn beside the doc blows, and they all know.

it is time to leave.

(y/n) stands, overlooking kattegat one last time.

she imagines her mother standing there, held into ragnar’s side with all of her brothers, young, running around and smiling playfully.

and she sees herself, cradled in the arms of her mother, her father gently cooing at her, smiles upon all their faces.

the image makes (y/n) well up once more, but she knows it is time to go.

“goodbye, home”.

@darkwhisperswolf@youbloodymadgenius@blonddnamedhandz@thelastemzy@annekleyn @inforapound @supermassiveblackhope @captstefanbrandt @roonil-wxzlib​ @alostsoulinhumanity

[fuwafuwamedb]

A Cure From Nippur Pt 2 (Gilgamesh, Hakuno)

Her hands stayed on him the entire way to the medic’s home. So soft, so loving; she rested her head against him as they walked, urging him on with such simple words.

Just a little further, she told him.

You’re doing so well, she praised him.

The more he saw that green dress upon her skin, the more he saw those ivory pearls from the depths of the waters; the more he found them unsuitable.

She would do best in crimson. Her silver headdress was a blasphemy to all that he stood for. It dulled her hair. It diminished from her features.

Gold. Now that would add.

Her hair would gleam in the morning light like dew off the trees in the depths of the Cedar Forest. Her dark tresses would no doubt glint with hints of copper and gold as she would awaken in his bed.

He wouldn’t mind a deep red draped upon her. Perhaps some khol for her eyes, letting him see more expressive eyes…

“We’re here,” Hakuno told him.

“Your majesty!” The medic was panicking, rushing forward.

“There’s no need to hurry,” Hakuno told him, “Please. You won’t be able to concentrate if you are focused on the fact that royalty is present. Please help this man. He was in great pains when I saw him on the street-“

“Forgive me, my king! I have told you before, there is nothing that can help with your ailment. I have done everything in my-“

The woman next to him started to move away, but Gilgamesh held onto her hand, refusing to release her.

“Y-You’re the king?!”

“Do not let go of me.”

Finally, for the first time in so damn long, he was capable of being himself. He was tempted to merely drape the woman over his back and have his men tie her into place. Either that or simply lose himself in his bed with her until the pain would permanently leave him and her body would be rewarded enough for its shielding him.

Yes, she would do well in his bed, wanton and beguiled.

“I-I can’t hold onto you forever!” Hakuno pulled at her hand a bit. “I-I came to negotiate a peace treaty! Your people have been sneaking women out of Nippur! We need it to stop!”

“Then bargain with me.”

He’d take her body and stop all smuggling from Nippur. Eternally.

The woman stared at him, mouth hanging open a moment before she fervently shook her head.

“Stop this!” She yanked her hand away, allowing all that pain to return, he doubled over, cursing loudly. “Are you jesting with me, king Gilgamesh?! This is no time for childish games! My people-“

“My lady! Put your hand back on him!”

The medic was yanking her back to him, all but shoving her into his body.

He needed skin to skin.

He needed skin to skin for the curse to stop.

Ishtar was almost about to be rewarded for that. He held her hand against his cheek, sighing in relief as her soothing touch flicked the pain off like a switch.

“…What has happened to you, King Gilgamesh?”

The woman stared at him, her dress skewed and her thighs exposed to his gaze as she was pressed against him.

She had the milkiest skin he’d ever seen on a woman.

Even Ishtar’s body had lacked avoiding the sun in a manner that this woman seemed to have managed. The goddess’ body possessed minute flaws, a fact he used many times to deny her when she would throw her charm at him.

This woman lacked nothing. Fair and plain, sure, but she was flawless in that average state of hers.

Her cheeks were starting to burn a bit as she held his face in her hand. Her eyes were drifting over him before she averted her gaze.

“Medic… You said before that the king was unable to be helped.”

“M-my lady,” the man moved forward, astounded. “The king has been in agony for years. The goddess… our patron goddess… she propositioned herself to the king and was refused. In return for his refusal, she cursed him to a state of agony. He was supposed to be unable to escape that pain unless he went to her.”

Hakuno looked up at him, frowning a little. Her voice going soft. “…You aren’t in pain right now, are you, my king?”

“There was an alternate out,” the king told her.

“You needed a woman?”

He nodded.

“So the smuggling was due to that?” Hakuno went quiet a moment, nodding. “I shall stay for a fortnight if you will promise to stop the smuggling.”

He’d stop the smuggling for a fortnight if she would stay for a fortnight.

“You will need to do better than that,” Gilgamesh argued.

“I don’t think you’re in a position to argue,” she told him simply. “You’re the one who needs me, after all. I could just leave.”

She dared to try to pull her hand away.

He looked to the guards nearby and nodded.

“You seem to misunderstand,” Gilgamesh murmured. “I am King Gilgamesh.”

Before she could argue, he pulled away, attacking the guards that were to protect her. Each one of them was struck down, left with a broken limb on the medic’s floor as Hakuno went to try to get up.

She was wearing customary Nippur attire. She wouldn’t be moving fast anywhere.

He had them all down when her hand was grabbing the door.

He had her yanked back into his arms and pressed against his body before she could escape him.

“Let us try this again,” Gilgamesh murmured into her ear. “Vow to me to remain at my side and I will cease the smuggling of Nippurian goods.”

“You attacked a diplomat’s guards!”

“You attempted to cheat me out of something I very much want.”

They were even now.

“Clean my mess,” he told the medic, carrying his struggling princess to his palace.

“As you wish, my king,” the medic told him. “My congratulations on the beautiful woman.”  

[retributionpriest]

Eclipse

Music

In this place between lives, there was peace.

It was quiet, dim and stretching out forever, a mirror surface of what was, and could be. She was not alone here, he was here too, except now the only hint of crimson on his body was the shock of hair on his head, as things should be.

There was no need for words, their presence together was all they ever needed, in both life, and death. It had been an unspoken fact, a subtle thing that only needed the slightest of nods to be recognized between the two of them. Words that never had a chance to be spoken in life laid bare, finally free from concern and denial. In death, all things were made clear. Here, in a place that was no place at all, they waited to be unwound from the mortal coil.

Above them the moon hung low in the sky, bright white like the core of her had always been, softer, here. But now, it spoke.

“Daughter of Dawn, you are called.”

She looked up, her hand clutching empty air where he should have been, the stillness shattered in the space of a heartbeat.

“Who are you?”

“I come with an offer.”

Unbidden, words echoed in her mind, wisps and fragments of memories of a life long past, freely given yet oh so very costly.

You have it in you to save them, all of them, if you are willing to pay.

The moon almost seemed to slip closer, an eye now, watching, scrutinising.

“An offer of life.”

“And the terms?”

The air around seemed to shimmer, warping and bending, breathing. Along the edges of the moon, shadows began to unfurl, roiling and writhing, a great black lid to cover the heavy eye.

“Your life, and all that it was made of. Fire, fury... and fear.”

She stepped forward, opening her mouth to speak, but she felt hands holding her back, freckled, scarred hands, hands that were bloodied, that glowed green and gold, that flipped through books with her and held her as they laughed. More words whispered to her so long ago in a place like but unlike this were called to mind, spoken softly, sadly. She stopped.

Do not let them fool you, and they will try. You need to look harder, Lirelle, when something seems wrong. It will be wrong. You are the only one who can see it. You need to look.

“And if I give you that, what then? What am I?”

“Something new. Better even. A being that is you, but unblemished by fear and mortality. A being that no longer fears the dark and cold. A being that is everything you could be.”

Lirelle looked up at the moon, at the shadows that slipped over its surface, a Cheshire grin hung in the sky by unseen strings.

You will know then, what the deal is for. You can make the choice, I know you can.

She stopped again then, a heartbeat, an eternity. Drinks and trashy books. Rum and salt. Petrichor. The ring of swords. Light and daggers. Crowns of roses. Rime breath. Gold mead. Phoenix down. Bastions. Khol and rubies. Stranglevine. Ivory sand. Carrion birds. Clawing shadows. Magazines. Gold dipped in blood.

Each had a name, each a pinprick of light in the dark, laced together to keep the shadows at bay.

“No. You offer me a chance to go back, to be better, but we both know what you bring back will not be me,” she took a breath, her hands balling into fists beside her. “I was afraid, for myself, for them, for what might happen to them. Fear guided my actions, it brought me down the path that led me here, and I do not regret it. My fears made me who I am. To take that away would be to lose myself. You want my spark? I will give it up. Fire and fury are part of who I am, but they do not make me. I am my choices, my experiences. I am Lirelle Dawnbrook, of Dawnveil, of the Crows, of the Sunguard, the Dawnmenders, of the Ardents, of Quel'thalas. I am Lirelle Dawnbrook, who took as many lives as I saved, who lived and killed and died for those I loved, even if I never told them.”

Her hands shook as she brought them up, but her voice was cool and steady. “I am Lirelle Dawnbrook, and you will not take that from me.”

The moon let out a laugh that shook the foundations of the world. “Are these terms yours for the making?”

“You will have me on my terms, or not at all.”

There was a humorless pause as it considered her demands. “Then so be it,” it said. “You will be given everything you are willing to sacrifice. Nothing more.”

“Fine. Let me see him.”

The air again twisted, and there he was as if he was never gone, next to her under the shining unmarred moon. Lirelle reached for him, lacing their fingers together, not wanting to let go.

“They need us.”

“No. They need you.”

“Aren’t you coming with me?”

“I’m all warred out.” His eyes were tired. “I’ve been trying to get here for so long. I think I’ll stay.”

“I don’t want to go alone.” She gripped him tighter. “Don’t make me go alone.”

“Then keep me with you. In every battlecry, and every spell on your fingertips. But I can’t come.” He pulled her close, gazing at her with piercing eyes. “You fought so hard to keep me safe, and here I am. Beyond pain. Beyond misery. Now go protect the others.”

She could feel the distant tug, small but insistent, but she resisted for a moment longer, holding tighter to him.

Don’t let the little losses stop you from making the big choices. You always lose something. You have to choose what to keep and what to let go.

“If I go, will you be here when I return?”

He nodded, slow and certain. “Go save them. Burn. As fierce as you ever were. And when the fighting’s done and the war is over. I’ll be here. We die together. I’m not leaving without you.”

“Wait for me.”

Lirelle closed her eyes, slowly, reluctantly, wishing she could stay, but knowing she must not. With a final touch, she let her fingers fall away from his-

And then all at once the shadow swallowed the moon and she was in the dark, Alone.

And it was cold.

I’m so sorry.

I’m going to get a bit sappy here, so bear with me. Lirelle died just barely a few weeks before our third anniversary in the Sunguard, and I would not trade those three years for anything. I’ve had the opportunity to tell some incredible stories here, and meet even more amazing people. I am so incredibly thankful that I have so many people who I’ve had the pleasure of writing with and becoming friends with, who are my sounding boards for ideas, partners in crime, and people who I can hurt with my stories :) Thank you all for putting up with me and my incessant screaming, and my life is so much better for knowing you all. If I RPed with you and our characters were close, chances are if you think something in there was about your character, it was.

A huge thank you to all the officers of @thesunguardmg for running the guild and making sure it was a space where we could grow, especially to @felthier for being our long suffering cat herder. Thank you so much Sean for giving me the means to tell these stories and make those I love suffer, for allowing me to be in your sandbox, and for being a great friend.

@stormandozone thank you for that vision that I have referenced in just about every bit of writing since. You are THE BEST witch, and I love you so much.

@thepilgrimofwar thanks for being a wanker and fucking me up while I was writing this. I know where you sleep.

To the rest of my friends both old and new, you are all very very dear to me, and I am immensely looking forward to writing more stories with you all.

[its-not-fine-but-whatever]

Unease

“Anhkena? Are you in here?”

Sotep glanced around the seemingly empty room. Hopefully he was just hiding somewhere. Doubtful. “Anhkena please.” After a few beats of silence she gave up looking for him in his room. That just means it was going to be even more difficult to find him. Hopefully he went to seek his mwt. Or even Ipy. As long as he wasn’t alone, that’s all she cared for.

Off to search another area.

Sotep eventually found her way to the docks, knowing of his love for the lake and it’s view. But he wasn’t there either. Sotep was beginning to grow desperate and was about to go in search of her yt to find out what happened when she saw Amunet walking towards the harem. She quickened her pace to catch up with hmt nsw’s long strides.

“Amunet!”

“Oh, Sotepenre. Have you seen your sn?”

“No, I am afraid not. I was hoping you had. I’ve searched in all of his normal hiding spots but unfortunately have been unable to find him. Have you any other idea on where he might be?”

“No, I’ve no any other ideas.” Amunet paused to look the preteen over. “Why don’t you get some rest hrd. You look apprehensive. I am sure your sn is fine, we just need to respect his wishes to be alone.”

Sotep almost scoffed at these words. She looked apprehensive? Amunet was one to talk. The woman that was normally so put together and calm had a frantic look to her eye. She wore no khol around her eyes and most of her normal jewels were missing from her person. Just a simple scarab necklace graced her neck. But it was hardly fitting of those with a royal status. She hardly look like the hmt nsw Sotep has come to know. On the other hand, Sotep knew in her heart that even she must not have looked her best. Maybe Amunet was right, perhaps she should rest.

But how could she get any rest with Anhkena missing?

“Yes, you’re right. I should get some rest. I’m sure Anhkena will turn up on his own. Thank you nbt.” The two shared goodbye’s and went their separate ways. It was not Sotep’s place to tell Amunet to stop looking for her own son, especially since doing so would make her a hypocrite. Sotep would not be able to rest comfortably not knowing where her sn had gone to. When the young princess knew that she was out of sight of Amunet her pace quickened. There had to have been a place they hadn’t looked yet. Maybe he was hiding in a dark corner that none of them had noticed.

A frustrated exhale managed to escape Sotepenre’s. Another failed attempt to find Anhkena. By now most of the palace was in a panic to find him, they were just trying to hide it from the kids. Her yt had been no help at all and sent her away to attend to her studies. Sotep knew that her dismissal was just an excuse to be rid of her presence. Adding to her frustration was the way some of the women in the harem were acting. As if the young heirs disappearance was not important. The future ruler of the empire was gone and they dared to mock his frazzled mother behind her back. The cowards.

She couldn’t let her mind linger on them.

A huff passed her lips. “Why must he do this? Can he not just go to his room?”

Halting at the end of the hall she noticed a small opening between the wall and an imposing statue of Amun. It was a fairly big hole, one she could fit through with minimal effort. An even smaller space appeared to be behind the statue, perhaps a smaller statue or flower pot used to reside here? Either way as Sotep peeked into the space, her sn was not there. Disheartened, she climbed back out of the space, tears beginning to well up in her eyes. No, she couldn’t allow herself to cry.

‘Princesses don’t cry. I can’t afford it.’

Sotep sat at the base of the statue. Tilting her head back, eyes closed, she tried to think. Anhkena had been missing for most of the day and she had been searching for him for most of the time he was gone. He didn’t appear to be in any of his normal spots and it was out of the question for him to have left the palace. She said a silent prayer for his safety and opened her eyes, studying the paintings on the ceiling. The intricate designs dedicated to their protection. Singing praises to the gods and those of royal blood. Depictions of the heaven’s stretched out above her head

A strange shadow appeared on the ceiling followed by the cry of a bird. She looked up and noticed a small fluffy bird. It was probably a baby judging by its size and fluffy feathers. It perched on the edge of the top of the column. The falcon stared back at her for a few moments before a pair of small hands picked it up. Sotep felt a breath escape her chest and she took in the whole scene before her. Anhkena appeared to be sitting on the other side of the column, his tiny figure barely visible from where she stood. A birds nest next to him with that was empty, it’s occupant resting comfortably in Anhkena’s hands. A blank expression remained on his face, even as he tenderly handled the baby animal.

As she processed the scene she was witnessing, panic began to set in. “Anhkena?!” He did not falter at her panicked screech. Dulled blue eyes drifted down to her. Those eyes had become more and more frequent lately. And they frightened her. At his silence she continued, “how did you get up there?! What are you doing up there!? Wait there! I’ll get a guard!”

“No! No...I-I can get down on my own…” Voice trailing off, the baby bird was returned to its nest and Anhkena moved to the edge of the top of the column.

“No! You could fall!”

“I’m fine.” Sotep nearly began hyperventilating watching the child climb his way down from his isolated perch. She hurried the small distance to where he landed and tugged him into a hug. “Don’t do that! You could have gotten hurt!”

She felt him shrug slightly. “I would have lived.” He stepped out of her grasp, eyes flicking between hers and the ground.

“You could have gotten hurt.”

“Did you need something?”

Sotep paused to observe her little sn. Those frightening dull eyes had a red tinge and struggled to make eye contact with her. The kohl around his eyes were smudged slightly. Lips pressed firmly together. Seemingly biting down harder and harder the longer she stared. The leather strip that normally held his hair back, he played with in this hands. Tugging and stretching the material. He looked nothing like he normally did. He didn’t even look as expressionless as she thought he was when he was on the column.

He looked distraught.

And his responses to her was doing nothing to help curb her worries for him. “Anhkena, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

“Are you sure?”

He growled out a yes and which made Sotep stop. Finally understanding that he was not willing to open up about what was bothering him. So she tried switching the subject.

“How did you get up there?”

He glanced up, “I climbed.”

“How did you even know the bird was up there?”

“Falcon. It’s a falcon.” He shrugged, “I heard the mother up there a few weeks ago while she was still pregnant. When I climbed up she didn’t attack, and...so I stayed.”

“That’s...nice.”

A nod was all she got before he turned his back to her. “Don’t tell yt.” The words reached her ears before he was out of sight. Quiet, yet the words reverberated in her head.

Later in the evening Sotep lay in bed thinking back on Anhkena’s punishment. He had gotten in trouble for worrying everyone. Extra studies and not being allowed to play with the others for the next few days. He took his punishment with all the grace Ramesses expected of him. Amunet looked as though she wanted to say something but held her tongue. It was probably for the best she did. He was sent to his room after the talk and hadn’t been seen for the rest of the night.

But what was it that had him acting like this? Nothing that happened that day was different than normal.

A quiet knock at her door shook her from her thoughts. It was late, Ra having long since going to make his nightly journey. Sotep hesitated before making her way to the door, grabbing a small statue along the way. “Who is it?”

“Anhkena.”

Pausing a moment to register the response, she quickly opened the door, beckoning him inside. “What are you doing out? Yt will be mad if you are caught out of your room.” Anhkena shrugged, shuffling his feet where he stood. His hair hung in his face, out once again. She reached to brush it out of his face but he stepped away. Hand dropping to her side, Sotep sighed. Instead, choosing to guide him to sit on the steps leading up to her bed. “Anhkena, what is wrong?” They sat in a silence for a while. He brought his knees up to his chest and rested his chin on them. He looked so lost for a moment, before he tilted his head, allowing hair to fall in his face. Sotep did not push him to talk anymore, allowing him to talk when he was ready. A feeling of unease settled in her stomach as time drew on.

“Yt hates me.”

Quiet. She almost thought she heard wrong, but looking at the small boy before her, she knew she heard right. Clenched fists began to shake, he sat hunched in on himself and buried his face in his knees.

“He hates me.”

“Do not say that. You know yt loves you. He loves all of us.”

Not looking up, he continued to shake with repressed sobs. “No. He doesn’t.” Sotep gently wrapped her arms around her sn. He flinched at first but quickly sank into her embrace, needing the stability. A small tear slipped down her cheek at his next whisper.

“I’m-...I’m not the son he wanted. I’m weak.”

mwt-mother                                                                                                            yt-father                                                                                                               sn-brother                                                                                                               hmt nsw-king’s wife/great royal wife                                                                    nbt-my lady                                                                                                          hrd-child

this was so hard to write. Sorry for not posting. I just haven’t really been feeling motivated to write lately, so started focusing a lot on my art. I just hit a slump for a while, hopefully I’m back at it. Sorry again

[oldsaltlord]

@inuy21 prompted me to write for this pairing with @jchnmulany ‘s prompt “God, you look good.” I loved doing it, even if it didn’t turn out very nsfw in the end XD! Thank you for prompting me and participating in this fic exchange! :D

Title: Making Memories 

Pairing: Fergus Cousland/Oriana Cousland 

Rating: Teen and up

Words: 2443 

Summary: Fergus and Oriana slip out of their own wedding for a few moments of long-awaited intimacy. 

“I can't believe we're doing this.”

Beneath the surface disbelief of her tone, Oriana's whisper had rung with more than its fair share of mirth, but also with a tension that seemed to stem from something very different than just the need to be quiet. Something that had her voice ring low and tight in the silence of the cool evening air, and made her breath flutter between her slightly parted lips. Fergus would have answered something right away, but his own mouth was very busy with the soft skin right under her ear, so he just hummed non-committally instead, and didn't reply until he was done pressing a last few long, burning kisses all the way down her throat.

Perhaps that partly explained why Oriana's voice was catching like that, now that he thought about it.

“Doing what?” he finally managed back, almost absent-mindedly.

He had pulled back a little – as much as he could manage with the heat of her still calling so ruthlessly to him – but that didn't mean he was willing to fully let go of her just yet. The back of his fingers dragged a slow line along the tender curve of her shoulder-blade, and already he longed to replace that touch with his lips again.

“Sneaking out of our own wedding?” he helpfully supplied, and the words tore a childish grin from them both.

“Yes, that,” Oriana laughed – that delightful sound – and when she closed her eyes and kissed his temple, Fergus could feel the wide smile she pressed into the short hair above his ear.

That helped the pull prove too much for him, and he pressed himself in tighter again, fingers grazing over the silken ruffles of Oriana's dress, up her arms, around her shoulders. Carefully, he lifted the long, intricate earring of gold and rosewood beads from her neck, pushing it back as if it were a strand of hair – which it might as well have been, given its length – so that the beads dropped behind her shoulder, and he could reprise his ministrations more freely. Her skin was soft under his lips, and scented with a rich, heady oil made with ambers, spices, and crushed rose-hearts. He knew Oriana had had her friends bring the small glass pot of it over from Rialto months earlier, in preparation for that day. He also knew they had helped her coat herself whole with it earlier that morning, before the ceremony. Gently, in between many a girlish giggle and whispered blessing, their sisterly fingers had pressed the mixture into the curve of her neck, the bend of her arms, the arch of her back and many more, secret places, to make sure that from the very moment Oriana stepped into the grand Hall of Castle Cousland for the ceremony, and up until the last day of his life, Fergus would never be able to forget that scent.

He could already tell it was working.

“Weddings are boring, anyway,” Oriana muttered, words slurring once more as Fergus' teeth dragged along the line of her jaw.

He smiled again.

“Even this one?” he wondered, trying to sound as if he had taken a bit of umbrage - and most certainly failing.

Oriana cupped his cheek in her hand and lifted his head to face hers. Her expression was so soft, Fergus couldn't help but lean into her touch, fingers running up her hand to intertwine with hers.

“Maybe not this one,” she whispered, tracing the lines of his lips with the pad of her thumb in a slow, burning circle that made Fergus shiver down to the very core.

Her eyes were circled with dark, heavy khol from her homeland, blacker than any coal. It framed her brown gaze like dark velvet would a jewel, and it seemed to Fergus it made her eyes glimmer just as brightly, in the dim light of the cloudy, rainless twilight.

“Maybe this one is the exception,” Oriana said, and Fergus couldn't have agreed more.

They kissed again. Fergus chased after her mouth with much more ardour than what was becoming, but then again, not much about him and his newly-wed wife taking each other's hand and somehow managing to slip out of everyone's sight to entangle like teenagers against a wall of the deserted inner courtyard was becoming of them, was it?

But he didn't care. He could still taste salt on Oriana's tongue, the ritual salt exchanged alongside their vows, pressed reverently on each other's lips under the kindly eyes of their people and their loved ones, and the sweet sting of it in her warm mouth was all that mattered to him, right then.

The stone of the inner courtyard wall was cool under their touch. A pale summer rose from the bush clinging to the arch nearby extended her delicate, wet petals towards the darkening sky. A solitary bat circled over them, wings fluttering in the still air with a sound like a whisper muttered against the constant backdrop of the waves crashing on the cliff-side. The noises of the feast still reached them, faint and joyous, but in that moment it all felt so distant it could have been happening in a whole other country, as far as he was concerned.

“Maker, Ori,” Fergus couldn't help but murmur, flush against her burning mouth, “You look good.”

He toyed with the many little rosewood beads that lined the hem of her sleeve, taking in the sight of her, her dark eyes, her flushed cheeks, the few dainty strands of hair coming out of her elaborate up-do, the warm colours of her dress, in stark contrast with the cool colours of the Castle...

“You feel good,” he said again, hand reverently raising to cup her breast through the fabric, and the way her nails dragged against his scalp in answer tore a soft, unashamed moan from his lips.

She quickly welcomed it into her mouth in another hungry kiss. She nibbled and bit and sighed, body loosening fast against his. Her fingers pressed a firm caress up his shoulders into the nape of his neck, and there they anchored, brushing soft circles at the base of his hair, keeping him close. When her knees parted wider, welcoming the pressure of his hips between her legs, Fergus eagerly indulged in the friction, and Maker, they shouldn't, but it was so hard to stop...

Could they really be blamed? They had been holding back for the whole ceremony, after all. Maker, they had been holding back for much more than that, really: for all of the long days, weeks, months, years leading up to that very moment, right there... It was no wonder keeping themselves in check had proved too difficult a task. The way things were going, the wedding night was well on its way to come much sooner than planned, and Fergus wasn't sure he found it in him to give a damn.

The more than a few cups of various spirits already coursing through their bloodstreams surely weren't helping them to keep reined in, either, but the newly-wed couple can't very well refuse a toast when the glasses are raised in their honour, can they? Neither can they two, or three, or however many their guests found appropriate to raise that evening. Fergus had lost count, to be honest. The fog in his brain was surely responsible in great part for his ill-advised decision-making, but it would have been a laughably grand lie to pretend like he regretted it, in that moment. Especially when Oriana's fingers started undoing the fastenings of his outer tunic to slither between its parted folds, so much closer to his skin.

“So do you,” she murmured.

Her lips found his ear and he could hear how she was panting, then, tight warm breaths tingling him as she nibbled at his lobe. He felt her hands circle him to unashamedly grab his arse, and as she used that hold to keep him firmly nested against her, it was all he could do not to buck forward like a boy half his age.

“I'm so glad, Fergus,” she all but whined, “So glad you're finally mine.”

“I am,” he answered, “Wholly. Forever.”

His tone had matched hers, tight and breathless, and it was all he could do not to moan when she threw her head back to present her throat to his hungry lips again.

“I know,” she whispered, and at that the urge to lift her skirts became far too strong for him to fight back, and so his hands avidly glided down her thighs to grab a handful of soft fabric, head spinning already with the need to tug it up, to uncover her legs, her hips, to burrow his hands in her heat and make her his, finally, finally, as a man would his wife, and not just in the usual frugal embrace, drowning himself in the scent of her offered throat, forgetting all about their titles and their duties for a few burning moments of just-

“Ahem.”

It was just one, deliberate coughing sound, but it was more than enough for Fergus to instantly recognise who was behind it. Him and Oriana all but jumped apart, and although neither of them were ever very prone to embarrassment, this time there was no mistaking the burn of it as it flared all over their faces.

“Aedan,” Fergus croaked out, very eloquently, “Hm.”

Stepping even further back, he did his best to gather himself, running a hand through his hair while Oriana, cheeks flushed, flattened the creases of her dress.

“We were just...” he started, but Aedan cut his feeble attempt at an explanation short by blowing a miffed huff through his nose.

He was standing with his hands on his hips, looking them on with a deadpan expression on his young features. Perhaps it was the wine, but Fergus suddenly found there was something very funny about the scolding attitude his little brother - all dressed up for the occasion and with his sash elegantly pinned to his chest by a heavy silver brooch - was putting on right then. Oriana seemed to think so as well, because one short glance her way was enough to tell Fergus she was biting back a laugh.

“Fergus,” Aedan scoffed, “I'm thirteen. I know what you were “just.””

And that was just the last drop needed to upturn the cup. Fergus dipped his head down, unable to contain his laughter any longer.

“Is that so?” he wondered, unsuccessfully trying to conceal the crack in his voice by pretending to clear his throat.

Oriana wasn't even trying to hide anything, at that point.

“Would you listen to him,” she openly laughed, “This grown man is aware of it all!”

She walked away from the wall, composure already all but recovered, while Aedan rolled his eyes in that rather theatrical way of his, arms crossing in front of his chest.

“Enough so to know that Mother and Father would scarcely approve,” he said, obviously trying to look as if he were the mature one, there, standing so high above their childish nonsense, “They've been looking for you everywhere.”

“So they sent you?” Fergus asked, finishing to straighten the collar of his tunic back into a more proper, less dishevelled state.

The embarrassment had faded away quickly: it was hard to remain upset about anything, to be honest. Not on such a happy day, and especially not about his little brother taking it on him to act grown-up in light of Fergus' own juvenile behaviour, for once.

“Not really,” Aedan admitted with a small shrug, as Fergus walked up to him as well, “I rather sent myself.”

He relaxed a bit, facade cracking to let a small smile through as Oriana laid a gentle hand on his shoulder.

“I thought I'd spare you the embarrassment of being dragged back to the hall by the ear on your own wedding day,” he said, “I'm agreeable as such.”

Fergus chuckled, and ruffled a hand through Aedan's curly hair, shortened for the occasion, but still very much unruly.

“That you are,” he mused, while Aedan pretended to squirm, but he was only half-joking, and they both knew it, when he added: “We are ever so grateful.”

“You very well ought to be,” Aedan winced, doing what he could to tame back the newly-tousled mess on his head with his fingers, and struggling.

Oriana helped, picking a few curls from his forehead and gently pushing them back up. She was smiling oh-so-softly, and Fergus once again found himself staring, marvelled, at the woman that was now his wife.

“Well, sorry about this,” she said, “We didn't mean to embarrass you.”

“I'm not,” Aedan protested, scoffing defensively, “So don't be.”

He dipped his gaze, though, and his voice was much lower, when he spoke again.

“You're happy,” he murmured, “I'm glad.”

Oriana's smile widened, and she bent down to kiss Aedan's hair, a short peck which he didn't shy away from.

“Thank you,” she said, and Fergus would have said the same, if only his throat hadn't felt a bit tighter than it ought to, at the moment, and he wasn't sure he could have kept his voice steady.

“Alright,” Aedan said, then, louder, as if the moment had suddenly become too weighty for his taste – and maybe it had - “Let's head back, shall we? Lest Father gets worried for real, and sends the whole guard after us all.”

“Let's,” Fergus agreed, finding he was, unsurprisingly, not so fond of that scenario.

He let Aedan take the lead, while him and Oriana followed suit. They exchanged a long gaze, in the silence that had formed. She didn't need to say anything: the mischievous gleam in her dark eyes told Fergus everything he needed to know without her even needing to open her perfect mouth. Smiling back, he extended his arm for her to take. She was right: there would be time for the rest, and very soon. All the time in the world, really. Wasn't that what they were getting married for? A little more celebration with their gathered loved ones surely was no disagreeable way to spend the wait. Even if, as he suspected, they weren't going to fool a lot of people with a few flimsy excuses about needing a bit of air, and were sure to hear about this for the rest of their lives.

Well, Fergus thought, pressing his hand over Oriana's as they walked back into the hall, preceded by Aedan, this wasn't a memory he was going to regret making any time soon, anyway. That much he was certain of.

[lincolnbadcoe-blog]

6 Steps to Great Bridal Makeup

Choosing the look of your wedding day makeup is as important as choosing your gown. Yet so many women spend months looking for the perfect gown and thirty seconds deciding on the makeup for their special day. Your look will be captured in photo’s forever, so it’s important to put on your best face with no mistakes. After all, you are the very centre of attension on your wedding day. Why leave your look to chance ? Here are a few tips to help you look picture perfect on your wedding day.

1. Perfect your canvas

Every bride wants beautiful, flawless skin on her wedding day. To ensure this, you’ll want to establish a good skin care routine at least two months before the ceremony. This will give your skin a chance to adjust to the new products, so your skin will appear healthy, smooth and clear.

i) Apply moisturizer let it dry completely.

ii) Apply a primer to suit your skin type.

If you have oily skin go for a primer with oil controlling ingredients to ensure long-wear and flawless application. If your skin is dry go for a hydrating primer this will help nourish and hydrate your skin.

weblink: Bridal Makeup Bundoora

2. Foundation Concealer Powder

Foundation is the most important item of makeup you will purchase, and, while the right formula can literally erase years, the wrong formula can add years. Why is foundaton so important ? It can make skin appear flawless and give it a healthy glow. It can cover imperfections and blemishes and smooth out uneven skin tones,making your skin look more youthfull. Wearing it coreectly can can do more for your appearance than almost any other makeup product. Unfortunately foundation can also be one of the most difficult products to choose correctly. Using the right formula is so important because the wrong one is almost guaranteed to make you look older. When choosing foundation, there are to things to consider. The first is to match your skin tone and its depth level, so that your foundation looks natural. The second is to match your skin type with the correct foundation formula. If your skin is oily, the oils from your skin can mix with the product and make your foundaton appear blotchy and uneven. So you will need a foundation with oil absorbers in it. If your skin is dry, you will need a foundation with moisturisers in it, to help your skin look youthfull and fresh. Wearing the correct foundation formula for your skin type can help your foundation stay on longer and your skin look younger.

i) Application, its best to begin your application in the centre of your face, dotting foundation on the cheeks and forhead,then blending outward. always remember to finish by blending downward to make sure all the facial hairs lie flat.

ii)After application blot with a tissue to absorb any excess foundation and moisture left from the product, especially around the nose and in your T zone,( all the areas that get shiny first) This will really help with staying power. Even though applying powder will set your foundation and absorb the excess moisture, blotting first will enable you to go longer before you have to touch up.

Concealer : Concealer can improve your skins appearance dramatically, but only if it’s invisible. The secret to concealing everything that you do not want to see is applying concealer just to the discolored skin. You will actually need to choose different textures of concealer, depending on what you are concealing.

i) To cover undereye discolouration ( caused by blood vessels that appear blue or gray when they reflect light), you need to choose the perfect shade and texture of concealer. If you use a formula that it to moist, it can travel, slipping into creases and fine lines around the eyes. A formula that is to dry is bad for the delicate skin around the eyes and can appear dry and caked. You might need to experiment to find the right formula for you.

ii) Application First perpare the undereye area by applying eye creme and letting it soak in for two or three minutes. Blot away any excess with a sponge or tissue. Using eye creme will hepl you concealer adhere, and if the skin under yur eyes tends to be dry, your concealer wont cake up and call attention to itself.

iii) Take a concealer brush and apply concealer along the demarcation- where the discoloraton begins on your skin. Extend the concealer up and over the the discolored area. You never want to apply the concealer below the line of demarcation. If you do you will lighten skin that is already the correct colour,and you will be back where you started with two uneven shades of skin.

iiii) Next take you finger and using a stippling motion ( a patting motion) , pat the concealer along the line of dearcation to blend it in. Be sure to conceal any darness in the corners of your eyes or eyeids if necessary. Yellow concealers are a great choice for covering very dark circles on ivory and beige skin. And golden-orange concealers work great on bronze and ebony skin.

Both concealers can counteract all shades of skin discolorations from red to purple to brown.

Finally, using a powder puff or powder brush,add a generous dusting of loose powder to your face to set your foundation for the day. This will help it last longer and give your skin a smooth even appearance. ( Make sure your pressed powder compact isn’t far away at the wedding reception for touch ups.)

3. Brow colour

When selecting a brow colour, choose one that is either your natural brow colour or one shade lighter. You may not need a lot of filling in, but some will definately help define and perfect your brow.

i) Well groomed eyebrows are a must. But before you reach for the tweezers ,take some professional advise. You should embrace your natural brow shape. Tip (Fuller brows make you look younger)

ii)Apply brow colour pencil or powder in short,feathery, hairlike strokes for a natural finish.

4. Eyes

Your eyes always express your joy and happiness, especially on your wedding day. Because photography is an itegral part of the day,it’s important that your eye makeup accentuates rather than dominates your eyes. Depending on the time of day and the lighting,your eyes can photograph very differently. I recommend using three different shades of eyeshadow to acheive the most beautifull effect. To help you eyeshadow last longer,apply concealer and loose powder on your eyelids before applying your shadow.

i) Application ( Natural beauty)

Apply a highlight shade : Apply to brow bone, the lid, and inside corner of lower lashline.

ii) Midtone shade: Starting from the outside corner of the eyelid(because the first place you lay your brush gets the most colour) Gently move your brush across the crease into the corner of the eyelid. Also brush along the lower lashline, one again starting from the outside corner and brushing towards the inside, so that the most intense colour is at the outside, fading as you move to the inside corner. This will help create subtle definition.

iii) Contour shade : Apply across your upper lashline from the outside corner inward. Then bring the colour up into the outer portion of the crease, and blend it inward about one third of the way,layering on top of your midtone shade. Sweep colour underneath the lower lashline for a blended look.

With this look, you have a multitude of blush and lip colour options,depending on the intensity of eyeshadow you choose. For instance, if you have chosen a dark eyeshadow contour colour,make sure you choose soft and subtle blush and lip colours. If you choose really soft and natural eyeshadow colours, you could choose a bit more intense blush and lip colours.

Eyeliner. For bridal i always recommend usng a pencil or soft khol liner in black, brown or taupe as these are more natural. Well defined soft smudged liner looks great in photo’s.

Curl lashes : I always recommend curling eyelashes because it opens up the eyes and makes them appear larger and more youthfull. If you do not like the usuall crimp-stlye eyelash curlers ther is now an ulternative heated eyelash curler. The trick to curling your eyelashes correctly is not to crimp them more than once at the lashline. Instead walk the eyelash curler up the length of your lashes,taking care to open and move the eyelash curler up a few times untill you reach the end of your lashes. This method creates more of a curve rather than a crimp and will help your eyelashes stay curled.

Apply two thin coats of waterproof mascara, comb through lashes between each coat with lash comb to insure no clumps.

5. Cheeks

Blushing bride. Want to be a rosy cheeked, blushing bride ? Here is an easy way to layer your cheek colour and make it last from the cremony to reception.

i) Apply a creme blush to the apples of your cheeks and cheekbones.

ii) Dust your cheeks with loose or pressed powder.

iii) Apply a powder blush similar to the colour of the creme blush to the apples of your cheeks and cheekbones.

Using this application method will give you a bit more intense colour, and everything will last throughout the evening.

6. Lips

Apply a lip balm to the lips before you apply lip colour to help liner and lipstick go on more evenly.

To help your lip colour last:

i) Conceal the ebtire lip area,everything from the natural lipline to the entire lip. This will create a more perfect edge,aswell as creating a perfect canvas on which to apply your lip colour.

ii) Line the outer edges of the lips with lipliner. This is the first defence of getting your lip colour to last.

iii) Next apply a soft pretty lipstick that loks natural yet still defines the lips. Next take a tissue and gently blot your lips.Then reapply your lipstick.Do not blot after this application.

To finish add a dot of lipgloss in the centre of the lips to attract the light and highlight your smile for photographs.

If you only want to wear lipgloss make sure you line your lips and fill in the entire area with lip pencil before applying the gloss. This will help your gloss last longer.

[bigyack-com]

Raftaar reveals what he wants from Kareena Kapoor, Ranveer Singh - bollywood

Rapper and musician Raftaar has opened up about how he quit the job of a salesman to pursue his passion of music, thanks to his father. The rapper said his father set him free to pursue his dreams.Speaking with Neha Dhupia on her podcast No Filter with Neha, Raftaar said, “Karna bilkul pehle se tha. Main aapko ekdum spasht batau toh 2006. Maine UCB mein salesman ki job kari thi. Par uss job pe mere papa ne kuch aisa kiya tha jiske wajah se maine kahan bas inhone chooth de diya, mujhe ab ladna hi padega (I always wanted to do it. If I tell you clearly, it was 2006 when it all began. I worked as a salesman in UCB but my father did something during that job that gave me the freedom to fight).” Talking further, he added, “Meri salary thi 10,000 rupaye; mere papa ki salary thi 12000 rupaye. Woh usmein se 10,000 rupaye nikalke mere takiye ke niche rakh ke chale gaye bolke jaane ki zarurat nahi hai, yeh le teri salary. Uss din maine decide kar liya tha ki ab itni chuth saamne se unhone de di hai yaar, I don’t have excuses to say ki main isliye nahi kar paaya ki mere maa-baap ne sath nahi diya, mujhe bahut roka. Mere maa-baap kehte the ki koi naa tu aazmaale apni kismat. Kuch nahi hua ek dukaan khol lenge, bhuka nahi marega. Matlab, kisi bhi tareeke se you will live. (My salary was Rs 10000 and my dad’s salary was Rs 12,000. One day he kept Rs 10,000 beneath my pillow and told me that I need not go on my job as he handed me the salary. That day I decided that my father had given me all the freedom he could, I do not have any excuse that my parents did not support my dreams. My parents asked me to try my luck, they assured me to open a shop if nothing else worked out, ‘You won’t die hungry. Live the way you want’).”Also read: Hotel Mumbai movie review: Dev Patel shines in cathartic cinematic experience; an antidote to populist propaganda“I started writing when I was in Class 7. I did not know then that I was writing rap, maybe it wasn’t even rap. I was pretty good at the rhyming structures. That’s where it started, like writing songs. And, then in Class 9, MP3 ka zamana aaya. This friend of mine gave me a CD. There were Eminem songs, Linkin Park songs and there was this remix of the band Queen – We Will Rock You. The song has a small rap portion. When I heard it, I felt it was great. It was similar to the rhythm I was writing and it was similar to the thoughts I had. Matlab kyu baar baar sirf pyaar mohabbat kyuki I can’t relate to that (Why only talk about love?). This, I can relate to. And, that’s where it started,” he added. Raftaar also talked about a host of other things, including Bollywood stars. Raftaar said he would like to gift the privacy he enjoys to Kareena Kapoor. “What I want to give is my sense of privacy that I have. I can go to a place with a cap on, like baggy pants pehen ke apna, main kahin bhi jaa sakta hoon kuch bhi kar sakta hoon, who nahi kar sakti (I can wear baggy pants and walk anywhere, do anything but she cannot). What would I take from her? When she was on the sets of DID, she is so sweet that she would turn around and make me a part of a conversation. She would make me feel equal so that sense of freedom, who main chahta hoon, dimaagi tor pe hum kaam kar rahe hai toh humare kaam ke liye jaana jaye (I would like to be known for my work). I don’t care who sits in the centre to the side.Asked about things he would like to give and take to and from Ranveer Singh, Raftaar said, “He doesn’t need anything. He’s got everything. Him, Varun Dhawan are the only two people who are in the culture and are fans of hip-hop. And, I would like to give them that credit, because a lot of people are like ki yaar yeh actors hai toh inko itna kyu deal wagera yeh sab milta hai(These are actors, why do they get deals meant for rappers?). Like, why did he play a rapper, somebody else could have and it was okay for us rappers also because he is a man of the culture. He loves that music. He listens to our songs. So, that credit. And in return, I would like to just, de de na, apne Frankwheeler wali gaadi de dena. Aaj subah hi dekhi, achi lag rahi thi (Give me your Frankwheeler car, I saw it this morning and it looked nice).”Follow @htshowbiz for more Source link Read the full article

[peakyxshelby]

First-second date

Michael Gray x reader

a/n: Good bit of fluff and a classic plot twist. What more could you want?

“So? How were it and who and where? Come on spill I need to know everything.” Your friend, Maria, quipped you about the date you went on last night. Honestly, it was awful and you never wanted to speak of it again, but you knew you weren’t going to be able to live it down if you said what actually happened. “I don’t know, average,” you say trying to shrug it off. “Who was it (Y/N) come on spill!” “It was…” you were panicking as honestly, you had no clue. You locked eyes with a young man standing across the street with a couple other boys around his age. You snapped your eyes away and sped up a little. “It was him. Shit, let’s go.”

“No way,” Maria gasped turning around to look at the boy. “A bloody peaky bout! (Y/N) who knew you could be so wild!” With that, she started marching over to where the group of boys was starting to make their way into one of the houses, the boy you had pointed out at the end.

“Maria Wait! what are you doing?” You called after her but there was no point in trying to stop her now she was already on some sort of mission. “Hello,” she laughed as she reached the boy. “Michael you coming?” another shouted to him as he made his way into the house. “Give me a minute!” He called back before turning to Maria. “Can I help you miss?” “Well yes actually,” You locked eyes with the man again as he looked confused at the two of you. You wanted the world to literally swallow you up there was no way this would end well. “So I heard you went on a date with my friend (Y/N) here and she said it was average.” “Maria..” yOu say interrupting her but she keeps talking over you/ “Now I need to know how you think it could have gone better so we can improve for the next one.” You gave Michael a pleading look as he still looked extremely confused. You shook your head and looked at the floor ready to admit your lie when he began to speak “I mean I actually had a lovely time.” “You what?” You and maria both said in unison. “What’s not to like? She’s beautiful. In fact, I was hoping to ask her on another date soon but she didn’t leave me a number and well if it was only average…” He trailed off. “She'll go!” Maria shouted excited at the prospect of another date being on the cards. You couldn’t help but smile at this boy you knew nothing about except his name just saving yours from extreme embarrassment. “8 o’clock? the garrison?” “Sure,” you say still in awe of the man. He winked before turning back around and walking into the house where the other men had gone. “(Y/N)!” Maria shrieked as you began to walk away. “What do you mean average? He was hot and he seems funny! You like him I know you do I can tell!” “I don’t know him, I can’t like him” “He’s charming if you don’t like him I will! Now one on we needs to get you ready. You began to walk towards the garrison from maria’s house just so she’d think you were actually going. She had spent ages doing your hair and makeup, even picking out an outfit for you to wear. You had no intention of actually going, partly because you didn’t think he’d actually be there. But the garrison was on the way to your house where you were heading. You could hear the bustle from inside as you passed. Your father told you to always keep your head down when you walk past the garrison, it was safer that way. “Oi, where are you going?” A voice called as you stormed past the garrison without a second thought. You shot back around when you realised who the voice was. “Wait, you actually came?” “Well, it’s our first-second date?” “But, I didn’t think it was a real first-second date.” “Well it is, Now are you going to explain to me why I am on a first-second date with a beautiful girl that I don’t know the name of.” “(Y/N),” you say skeptically. You weren’t sure what you wanted to do but he had made the effort to show up so maybe you should just go. “I’ll tell you but I have to get changed.” “I’m Michael by the way,” he says running over to catch up with you as you start walking away. “I know, heard it earlier.” “Why are you getting changed you look great,” Michael said looking down at you. He genuinely believed it you could tell by the way his eyes lit up. “It’s just not really me, Maria thinks I'm a doll to dress up.” “Ah, maria is the friend right?” You nodded. “The one you lied to?” “Now, don’t judge me too quickly. I had the night from hell and I would never be able to live it down. You don’t understand what she’s like.” “Oh, I think I do. How was it the night from hell then? Go on enlighten me.” “Well first off he was an hour late, so I was sat alone in a shady bar by myself for an hour. And then he turned up drunk as anything and was sick in my food! I didn’t stick around to get his name!” You scoffed pulling a face recalling the chunks the man had blown the night before. Michael burst out laughing at this. You hit him in the arm lightly. “Stop it it isn’t funny!” “Ok I know, I’m sorry,” he giggled trying to keep a straight face. “But how did I come into this?” You explained everything, how you were too embarrassed to tell her what really happened and how he had just happened to be conveniently standing by. “Right I’ll be down in a second stay here,” you whisper when you reach the door not wanting to wake anyone up as you ran inside.

A couple minutes later you came out in a yellow jumper and a flowy skirt covering all your leg unlike maria had suggested. The clothes were comfy and honestly, that’s all you cared about. You had taken your hair out of the crazy updo and let it fall naturally as well.

“Wow, you look… different.”

“Sorry I know it’s not the best,” you say embarrassed at how he had reacted. You should have jst kept the damn clothes on.

“No, you look beautiful. Like you look more you. Weird that isn’t it I don’t know anything about you and I’m saying you look more you.” You laugh at him and observe his face as he stared at you his eyes still lit up.

“So where are you taking me?”

“I was going to take you to the garrison, but it’s loud in there you know. Would you just like to walk?” He held out an arm for you to take.

“I would love to.” You linked your arm in his as he leads you down the road towards the docs.

You walked around for hours it must have been past midnight now. Your father would not be happy that you were out too late but you didn’t care. You were having the best time with Michael, who was very charming indeed.

“I’ve not seen you around here before you know and I really do see everyone. I’m quite the observer.”

“I’m kind of new in town I guess, I was adopted you see..” He began to tell you his story, how he had ended up here in Small heath. Half way through his talk you realised who he really was. You dropped your arm out of his immediately and stopped in your tracks. Everything he had been saying all night had started adding up as the light switched on in your head.

“(Y/N) are you OK?” Michael asked looking over concerned.

“You’re a peaky blinder. those cousins you speak about they’re the Shelby’s?” He nods slowly still looking confused. He takes a step closer to you but you take a step further back. “How could I be so bloody stupid, of course, you’re a blinder look at you.”

“What’s that meant to mean?”

“I need to go home.” You quickly start to walk back down the street, honestly, you were petrified you never had walked small heath alone this late at night. But for all, you know your biggest threat could be standing right in front of you.

“Woah OK hold on let me walk you back.”

“No, I think you need to leave.”

“(Y/N) What’s going on?” He asks reaching out to grab your arm.

“Get off me!” You shriek your voice echoes through the empty streets. He raises both his hands above his head and looks at you.

“Look I won’t touch you (Y/N), just calm down and tell me whats going on.” you hadn’t realised but you had actually started hyperventilating and tears had to begun to stream.

“They killed my brother,” you sobbed. Finally letting the words out broke you, you slumped down onto your knees in the middle of the street. Michael got down next to you placing his hand slowly on top of yours.

“I’m so sorry,” he started. It was clear he was uncomfortable as he didn’t know who your family was and if he should even be speaking to you. But he liked you, he really liked you and seeing you upset was hurting him, he just wanted to help.

“What happened?” He asked gently not pressuring you to tell him.

“Burnt his body to the ground when they burned down the Marquis of lorne, his pub.” Michael pulls his hand back, realising exactly what she was on about. You could see him calculating things, the cogs in his head spinning. He looked at you with sorry eyes before pulling you into a hug.

“We’re destructive people, I’m sorry. I won’t hurt you though just let me get you home safe OK?” He pulls back to look at you as you nod back at him. You don’t know what it was about him but he seemed different to the rest.

“You look like a panda,” he laughed before rubbing under your eyes to get away the black khol that had run. “Come on now.” He pulled you up to your feet then pulled you in close guiding you home.

When you finally reached your door you turned around and threw your hands around his neck hugging him as tightly as you can.

“You’re different Michael, don’t let them change you,” You say as you pulled back from the hug. He paused for a moment before pulling your waist back and crashing his lips onto yours. You were stunned for a moment before letting yourself relax and kiss back.

“Thank you for the most amazing first-second date,” he whispered still resting his forehead on yours.

“Thank you for being so much better than the first date,” you laughed a little before pulling back and making your way towards your door.

“So when am I seeing you again huh?”

“Tomorrow, be here at 6.” He nodded as you closed the door behind you disappearing from sight. He took a couple moments just standing there thinking back to the amazing night he had just had. This one was a keeper and he wasn’t about to let her go.

[dimigex]

Moving On - Sakura/Gaara

Soo, this is a really old request that’s been sitting around waiting on me to write it. I fell so in love with the idea that it might have a full story coming. This is more of a prologue than drabble. I just need to finish some other stories up first. 

Tears spilled down Sakura's cheeks despite her best efforts to hold them in. She’d known that this day might come, but she hadn’t expected it to hurt quite this much. She couldn't draw in enough air, and the shattered pieces of her heart tried to worm their way free of her aching chest. Sakura forced another breath into her lungs, felt them expand to welcome it, even as she sobbed through the exhalation.

You're such a baby, Sakura chided, watching the darkness settle around her. You're still breathing, still alive. Think of all the people who didn't come home from the war.

Though Sakura knew it was true, the cold logic didn’t bring her any comfort. Worldwide destruction had just been averted, partially through her own skill, and that of her team. She should have been celebrating, thankful to see another day. There had been dozens of invitations to do so. Half of the shinobi in Konoha seemed to have gone that route.

Barring celebration, Sakura should have been weeping over the loss. Ino and Shikamaru could have used the support of her friendship after losing their fathers. Or Tenten and Lee, after Neji’s death. Instead, Sakura was crying because Sasuke didn’t want her, wouldn’t take her with him on his journey of atonement. The foolishness of it took her breath away, but that didn’t stop the tears.

The soft scuff of a retreating foot caught Sakura’s attention. Her head jerked up, fully expecting the culprit to be Naruto. Somehow, her teammate always knew when she needed someone, even when she wished he didn’t. She’d seen the pity in his eyes when Sasuke rejected her, again. He must think she was an idiot for continuing to chase him.  

 Sakura turned toward the eavesdropper; it wasn’t Naruto. Dusk softened the man’s bright red hair, while somehow making his aquamarine eyes stand out starkly. A blush colored Gaara’s high, pale cheekbones. "I'm sorry, I didn’t mean to disturb you."

"Kazekage-sama," Sakura greeted primly. She wiped at her cheeks, knowing the tear tracks would catch the moonlight, making it obvious that she’d been crying. "May I help you with something?"

"Gaara, please." The man's lips tilted into a phantom smile, like they were unused to the expression, but attempted the gesture anyway. "I didn't mean to impose, I just needed to get out of my room for a while."

Sakura nodded understandingly. Now that the war was over, the rebuilding process had begun. Even so, there was only so much that could be accomplished in a single day. Exhaustive lists of shinobi killed in action needed to be combed through, the Kages need to discuss their allegiances, then there was the physical restructuring. The task felt overwhelming.

"Me too," Sakura shifted slightly, lifting her feet from the ground. She’d wandered away from the main village, to a playground that she’d known would be deserted this time of night. Something about the soft creak of the swings, and the way the moonlight sparkled off the river in the distance comforted her. "I suppose I look quite childish sitting here. Alone, when there are million things I could be doing."

Gaara raised his shoulders in a shrug as his teal eyes roved over the shadowed equipment. “There are dozens of things that need my attention as well.” The man crossed the pebbled stone and lowered himself onto a swing next to her.

Sakura watched him from the corner of her eye. Gaara’s lips were set in the serious expression that almost always graced his features. Thinking back, she remembered the frantic worry in his eyes as he watched her force Naruto's heart to pump until the Fourth Hokage could save him. There had been a moment of joy when Naruto drew another breath, a true smile of friendship, not just hope for winning the war. The Kazekage wasn’t entirely emotionless.

Naruto is worried about you." Gaara's voice was oddly formal to her ears, but there was an undertone of worry in it.

Sakura forced out a chuckle, then pushed off the ground, swinging backward, and closed her eyes. Gaara didn't say anything, just watched her with khol rimmed eyes. "Naruto worries about a lot of things he can't fix. It isn't his place,” she began, meeting his gaze.

Gaara frowned for a moment, then spoke suddenly. “Why don’t you come to Suna for a few months?”

Dropping her feet to the ground, Sakura raised an eyebrow at the Kazekage. "What? Why?" 

Shoulders dipping forward as he looked at the ground, Gaara considered his words. "I can't claim to have much experience with relationships, but Naruto has taught me a great deal about them in theory. The one thing that I do know, however, is that they aren’t supposed to hurt like this." He half-gestured to Sakura’s cheek, then let his hand fall away. "I imagine love should hurt even less.”

For a moment, shock stilled Sakura’s tongue. The moonlight and shadows made it difficult to tell, but she thought she saw the dusting of pink on the Kazekage’s cheeks. “It’s none of my business--”

“What would I do in Suna?” Sakura interrupted, annoyed that Naruto would put Gaara in this position. “My life is here.” 

“You did amazing things with the poison Sasori used on Kankuro. Even Chiyo wasn’t able to construct an antidote that quickly.” Gaara must have seen the pain that crossed Sakura’s face at the memory, because he hurried on. “And, you saved Naruto during the war, when all hope was lost. You’re an unrivaled medic. Our shinobi could learn a great deal from you.” 

Gaara slid a finger beneath the crimson collar of his coat, loosening it. If Sakura hadn’t known better, she would have thought he was nervous. “Tsunade-sama will stay in Konoha long enough to train Kakashi as her successor, so you’d have a few months to spare, if you want. Then, you could come back to the Leaf and oversee the hospital here.” 

Despite everything, Sakura burst out laughing. “Is there anything Naruto didn’t help you plan?” 

Gaara’s flush deepened. “We’re leaving tomorrow,” he added curtly, ignoring her outburst. “If you want to come with us.”  

The man stood and started to turn away. Realizing the rudeness of her actions, Sakura followed and caught Gaara’s sleeve. He startled at the touch, and she dropped her hand away with a blush of her own. “I wasn’t laughing at you,” she corrected hastily. “I can tell that Naruto put you up to this. You’d have no reason to think of me otherwise.” 

“That isn’t true,” Gaara shifted weight to his opposite foot, not quite looking at her. “I never properly thanked you for helping Kankuro, or me.” 

Sakura paused, realizing it was true. Gaara had publicly thanked Naruto, of course. Without his help, they never would have been able to rescue Gaara. And without Chiyo’s sacrifice, their efforts would have been in vain. The memory was painful enough that Sakura shied away from it. “Anyone would have done the same,” she brushed off his words. 

“Few could have accomplished it,” Gaara argued, then shook his head. “The offer stands if you’re interested. I think our medical nin could learn a great deal from you.” 

“Thank you, Kazakage-sama,” Sakura paused and drew a breath before correcting herself. “Gaara.” 

The man’s lips quirked upward again. “We’re leaving at dawn.” 

“I’ll see you then.” The answer surprised Sakura, but she knew it was the right one. Time away from Konoha, from the pitying looks of her friends, and the reminders of Sasuke, might be exactly what she needed. The decision made the pressure in her chest ease. Sakura had a plan now; she wasn’t worthless, and she could prove that in Suna.

[mugler88]

Every Single Rupauls Drag Race Queen Ranked from 1 to 100 by David Mason You will notice as thece list goes it runs from HARSH to KIND being that we go from people who are wasting our time and perhaps not living an honest fantasy but trying to be something they FEEL they're SUPPOSED to be and talented artists who capture us as they reveal beautifully honest selves which bloom from their unconscious. The Top 25 are ICONIC GOLD and are identities who hold their own amongst all the queens. They are APEX PREDATORS and each could arguably be made number one depending on each persons values. This is MY list and therefore it reflects my values and needs. 100. Phi Phi O’Hara Shes actually the worst for being a horrible person who cant figure out why shes terrible and thats the worst part. I actually BOOED her in public when I saw her. Is it wrong to not like someone just because they were born??? I think it probably is BUT I dont like Phi-Phi because when they showed her mom her mom was like 26 and I just thought YUCK, unplanned pregnancy is just TACKY and I wouldnt have to deal with you if your mom just had the balls to own her own body and be responsible and kind to the Earth and abort you but apparently the apple doesnt fall far from the (say this in Goldie Hawn from Overboard voice) “short, fat, slut" and you come from a long line of short selfish inconsiderate people. Phi-phi is the best case as to why Planned Parenthood should be next to every McDonalds. 99. Kenya Michaels : Oh god Im disturbed by her. She was like that little doll from Trilogy of terror. I found her strong sexual identity so uncomfortable as it was just too obviously a defense mechanism from being a tiny rapeable person from a third world territory. Thats AWFUL to say but Im sorry its just what I saw. I didnt find it funny or sexy. I found it awful and cringy. Its NOT a reason to not like a person but it is a reason as to why I dont want to see her on my tv bending over and WAGGING HER TWAT at me. I dont want to celebrate her complex attempt at molestation management, Im sorry. Lets hope this is me just projecting. I know this is too much for the SECOND entry but Im just saying what I felt. I wish shed read a book instead of just GOING WITH THE SEX THING. 98. Kandy Ho: What gross name, what a skank not even a good skank like Samantha Fox, just a shitty skank. 97. Phoenix: Who? I really have to speed through this list I have to go to the gym. 96. Madame LaQueer: Id put her at 99 but I feel bad for her. Im a nice person. 95. Alisa Summers: i have no idea who this person is 94. Penny Tration: Oh fuck you for that stupid name. Get the fuck outta here. 93.Vivienne Pinay: Why did she think she was pretty or passable or fishy or WHAT? All I saw was “Hi, Can I get the lunch special? I’ll have tai Iced tea with Rad Prik Chicken and coconut soup. Thank you.” 92. Venus D-Lite: Venus is who I think of when I think of queens that dont matter. I didnt even say that to be mean. She just is. 91. Jaidynn Diore Fierce: ??? oh she was the one I think should be named PEANUT. 90. Naysha Lopez: What plane of consciousness thought this person needed to be seen? 89. Sasha Belle: Awkward entry! Rip off Mugler Chimera dress. HERES A TIP PEOPLE, dont try and copy the most amazing well made dress in the world that cost 300k to make and 900 years of 900 year old Parisian couturiers to make. I PROMISE YOUR VERSION WONT BE AS GOOD. If youre going to copy something also make sure said reference has a TEENSY bit of wiggly room for either styling OR improvement. The Mugler Chimeira dress does NOT. Stop looking at it, you cant have it. 88. Akashia: Maybe the first person to fall on the runway??? I dont know? I dont remember her exactly 87. Rebecca Glasscock: I went shopping with Ru once at Saks and a sales girl came up and said “Rebecca works here now!” Ru went from Cafe au lait to FISHBELLY faster than she could mutter... “Rebecca is here?…....now?” thank god the girl was like “Not today”… Cocoa pallor regenerated, shopping recommenced. Rebecca must have been INSANE. 86. Honey Mahogany: Who and Why and whatever…. 85. Derrick Barry: Nope. 84. Robbie Turner: I wish you were Tina Turner 83.Cynthia Lee Fontaine:The cowboy look was like a THANKSGIVING revelation that GRANPA IS A CROSS DRESSER?!?! 82. Darienne Lake: Dip into the cool water of Darienne Lake was the best thing about her and that was Rus doing so.. BYE and shes from like Rochester or some shit. YUCK mid/western New York is SKANK. 81. Ginger Minj: Just everything I don't appreciate. 80. BeBe Zahara Benet: She won season one and I think the prize was 10k and it shoulda gone to Nina. 79. Bob the Drag Queen: After the extraordinarily beautiful Violet won. The audience of sheep were put off by their inability to relate to her because they just arent as good as her so the next season they wrote the season about having a “peoples princess” win and that why we have SHITTY BOB the person who shouldnt have ever been invited. Whats WORSE and MORE ANNOYING is the LATENT worship of Violet after they realized JUST HOW GOOD SHE WAS ONCE THEY SAW BOB and Im sitting here with my fists clenched screaming YOU IDIOTS THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT?!?!?! Bobs season was the worst. 78. Delta Work: Shes the drag queens drag queen. Shes too bitter for tv though. Same reason as to why Jackie Beat isnt on tv, too sour for tv, but thats ok. There is certainly somethig to have the cache of being the type of queen you have to go out to see. When she botched the comedy challenge I felt for her. I could really relate. She has the comic ability and you could just hear the inner dialogue of self sabotage running in her mind. It sucked. Thats one of my challenges too. 77. Thorgy Thor: Funny smart queen that I like. Tv isnt a format that suits her. 76. Sahara Davenport : A sweet soul. 75. Yara Sofia: Ick… The best example of LEARN TO EDIT. Her styling is THE GOOP SHOW. You know how some people just have BAD VIBES? I just dont want her around me. I dont see her vibes swirling in a direction I wanna head towards. I kinda hate dreads, Id lie and not say it to sound cool but there just unsavory to me. Patchouli.. thats what I smell when I see them in my minds eye.They just make me ask.. Why do you deliberately choose to be kinda not so clean? Its some romantic notion I don't prescribe too. Im not earthy in that way. Im Earthy in a watermelons are fierce kinda way. 74. Kelly Mantle: This person is not Christine Baranski! Why are you telling me youre related to a baseball player like Im supposed to care? 73. Magnolia Crawford: ahahahahahahahahahah... that poor homosexual. He MIGHT be more disliked than phi-phi. THAT NOSE gets points.. it HAD to be a critique on nose contour right?! Does anyone ACTUALLY know her?! I feel like this might be some weird dare that a straight guy did and made it on the show. It was all so WEIRD?! 72. Jade. I really dont remember a damn thing but kinda thought she was a nice person maybe??? errr ummmm I just shrugged my shoulders to myself. 71. Lanaysha Sparks: She was quite lovely and even surprisingly talented on the craft contest but not knowing who Diana Ross is and your a drag queen is SATANISM. Poor bitch is from Puerto Rico, do you now Puerto Rico is twice as poor as the poorest state? That sucks. 70.Laila McQueen: Is this an OSBORNE CHILD?? Had she been on previous seasons she would have faired better. Seemed like a kid Id hire as an intern and could trust. 69. Serena ChaCha Oh my god Serena snook right by me?!?! AHAHAHAHAH Serena! Worst look of ALL TIME. how was SHE an art school student?! I cringed when she said that as Im an art school kiid and was like NO NO NOPE TAKE IT BACK CLOSE YOUR MOUTH! Serena was the victim of QUEEN ON QUEEN GANG BULLYING and what was worse is AMERICA BACKED THE GANG RAPE. It was like that scene in The Dark Crystal when the Skeksi looses the sword challenge and they all tear the clothes of him and banish him! Alyssa WENT IN on her….Coco even got a piece of Serena that day! Serena is lucky to be alive. 68. Jasmine Masters: Im disturbed by my own ability to impersonate Jasmine Masters. Its not THAT GOOD but its better than a 225lb Pollock should be able to do. Her Slinky worm routine makes me GIGGLE. She is ANGRY…...BLACK RAGE which I kinda appreciate in a way. I get it. I have gay rage so why cant she have BLACK RAGE?! 67. Tempest DuJour awww tempest.. We all like Tempest. Kinda funny shes a costume design teacher though no? She gave my husband a shirt and my husband wore it for her all day in Provincetown because my husband is like the sweetest person ever. I mean people were like “TEMPEST DU JOUR?!” they practically SPIT on him and he still wore it and he tagged her in the photo and she didnt even regram lolololol My poor husband, I love him so much. 66. The Princess: I made a comment about the Princess' look being shitty on Instagram once and all her fans went APESHIT. It was the two nastiest messages I ever deleted. 65. Monica Beverly Hillz I shoulda put her farther back. She was not so great. 64. Vivacious: Awwww the old battle axe of drag. I support her endaevor but her looks were so dated. I do however respect her respect for the art so… 63. Lashauwn Beyond: That name is so real. You can say she sucks but you can also say shes the spirit of drag taking you “up" so let her be. 62. Mrs. Kasha Davis: WOAH boy did she sneak by me?! She must have got here EARLY and just WAITED. She sucked so hard you kinda loved her for being honest. Kasha was like your olde gay neighbor whos taste level sucks but you respect her because she went through the AIDS crisis and is still smiling. Not even kidding. 61. BenDeLaCreme: I just did not like her. 60. Pandora Boxx: Oh god Pandora. Did you see that Unicorn video she made… bless this bitch. 59. Shangela Laquifa Wadley: Shangela was just cheap. Shangela is like the same taste level as like Paula Abdul, Mad Tv, Khols, a Sketchers Sneaker… I just never like what she does. I dont need it. Its poor person humor. Just because you say something LOUDLY doesnt make it more funny. ( as I type in CAPS) 58. Roxxxy Andrews: This poor bitch dug a damn hole… You know shes not likeable because she was shadey but she was more talented then anticipated in the creative challeges, and I thought she had nice skin. My husband HATES HER. 57. Kim Chi: One note. Refrigerator being pushed down a runway. I actually dont like her for not having the courage to be out to her parents. Its insulting to the rest of us. Buck up bitch, your mom already knows, shes known since you were 2. The fact you think she doesnt know is INSANE. Your non outness renders any talent moot. 56. Adore Delano: Thanks but Ive been to Hot Topic, NEXT. 55: Acid Betty: I don't remember much about the 00S BUT I STILL REMEMBER THOSE WIGS. 54. Courtney Act: Ok sure, but wheres the interesting part???? Her finale dress that was like rainbow hologram acetate was cool and nobody even mentioned it. 53. Trixie Mattel: I tried so hard to be nice to her in Provincetown and she was a cunt. Why are you a cunt to someone being NICE to you? 52. Coco Montrese : I could say mean shit but I wont. shes worked long and hard and deserves a clap. Shes not even a cunt. shes out of touch but shes from another world. Respect your elders. 51. Dida Ritz: Talk about out of touch. Her weird self loathing “Im a white girl” routine turned me into Jasmine Masters?! Like EWWW NO, learn to love yourself BITCH. We all know she did one of the best lip synchs ever. 50. Stacy Layne Matthews: Wait shes NOT black?!??? She was from BACK SWAMP, that gets TREMENDOUS "SWAMP CRED" She was so fat her hormones were just like "WHATEVER.. theres simply "NOT ENOUGH of us to go around?! WE DONT KNOW WHERE TO GO.. What do you wanna be today??? When was the last time youve seen your genitals because are you SURE youre still a male?? We dont know and could use some DIRECTION?!” and I appreciate that. I like people who are just like IM WHATEVER. Not everyone has to be a male or a female you know. 49. Jade Jolie: Jade is surprisingly the fishiest queen in my opinion. I saw her at the premiere party before her season started and we honestly thought she might be BIOLOGICAL. This holds some cache in an art of trying to be a woman at least SOMEWHAT. She made the unfortunate mistake of becoming Alyssas ENEMY which at the time was ACTUALLY kinda necessary because if you remember when Alyssa first started she was not the Alyssa we know and love and was kinda of a cunt who needed to get CLOCKED. BACK ROLLS has now been mutters a million times by ME ALONE and lets be honest WERE ALL now VERY CONSCIOUS of our back rolls now. I even got COOL SCULPTING and yes it worked. It works if youre like semi normal with a slight love handle or backroll but not if you have a spare tire because then its just like removing a brick from a wall, and no it didnt hurt, but get it done in Florida because procedures are cheaper there. Florida is basically LAWLESS, they also gave me a VITAMIN DRIP as I did it. That is not legal in NYC. Jade had horrible style and made what looked like NAZI MATRIX PORN but dont imagine that in a good sorta Night Porter chic Nazi way. Imagine it as a black vinyl raincoat that that greasy haired kid in high school who wasnt allowed to be a faggot because you already had that role and did it better so he sorta segued into FETISH GOTH would have and now imagine him filming himself masturbating with a NON APPLE iPhone to a Marilyn Mason poster… That was her porn. 48. Sonique: Sonique is responsible for one of the wisest self realizations to ever surface on RPDR to me. After getting the chop she said something along the lines of “Well I guess theres more to life than being better than everyone.” YUP. Stop competing, life isnt a competition. You do you and thats your challenge, forget about everyone elses storyline. 47. Mystique Summers Madison: DANGEROUS PERSON but such good TV. To me it seems Mystique has the kind of tongue that can only tell lies, which is sad because that means she thinks whatever the truth is is so terrible she has to come up with an alternative. Thats unfortunate. That said I dont want her in my home. If she lies to herself and others this means she feels she doesnt have to play by the rules and probably steals. Did I just imagine her a thief? Yes, I did. I imagined her at a party at my house slipping one of my Versace candy dishes in her pocket WITH THE SOUR PATCH KIDS STILL IN IT. 46. Gia Gunn: Gia to me really is the sorta line between the queens you care about and the queens you take the opportunity to go get a drink while they come on stage. I took my two assistants on that Drag Cruise as a present and I cant remember what exactly happened but somebodies sneakers were TEMPORARILY ABDUCTED and Gia was UNNFUCKED and SURLY ABOUT IT. Gia on the show was half gross and half awesome. I feel shed LIKE to be nice but has so much DEFENSIVE ANGER she can't. Its a mistake as shed be much more successful if she got over that. She really feels herself despite having a wonky eye, really short legs, and likening herself to Talapia and aligning herself to TIM GUNN??? Your fashion references are from TV????!… OH GURL… NO!.… I like her though. Shes a talented performer. I feel like Gia is that friend you have thats sorta like a bad dog on leash. You have to be careful with them when around kind people but theyre also helpful because theyre more than eager to be the bad guy if someone is bugging you. We all have that friend and theyre kinda fierce. 45. Mariah. Mariah walked into the room first episode and I thought DAMN shes FIERCE... and then she never looked that good again. If I was just going by tv, which Im 98% going by shed be placed lower BUT I saw her on that drag cruise and her performance was PERFECT. It was CLASSIC DRAG but executed flawlessly and she was nice when we got stuck in the elevator with her. I feel like she thinks she has to be mean or fierce or whatever when shed actually be more well received if she was the person I saw on the cruise who was down to Earth and chill. 44. Milan: Milan is one of the few New York Queens that Ive ACTUALLY SEEN OUT. These other queens im always like NEW YORK? NEW YORK WHERE?!? Im a third generation new Yorker who has lived here 18 years on my own and Ive never seen most of these queens who claim to be from NYC. Milan is nice and a talented performer. I was never into her drag because shes real STAGE oriented and real JULIARD STYLE ( I dunno if she actually went there) and thats just not my interest but she at least TRIED. 43. Dax ExclamationPoint: I feel Dax sorta made a mistake pigeon holing herself as “Queen of the nerds”, as soon as someone claims identity of something on camera queens for some reason HATE IT. I imagine its some kind of projected self loathing as gays are trained to hate themselves. Like how dare YOU assert yourself as something, you CANT do that youre a faggot. I seriously think this is the unconscious voice in 98 percent of gay guys heads and its why so many are self sabotaging or drug addicts and why there is no such thing as a gay gay icon and even kinda why DRAG EXISTS AT ALL. We cant like ourselves because straight society taught us to hate ourselves so we put it all onto a fantastic woman. Dax seems like a nice person who doesnt have that insane person need to “win” and therefore really shouldnt have been on the show as she just got used as sacrifice for hungrier queens. 42. Kennedy Davenport: Wait did I already do Kennedy Davenport because I really didnt like her??? huh I guess I didnt. Well maybe my unconscious mind liked her more than my reptile ego did and she got placed higher than anticipated. How can you hate on a hard working talent who has a retarded sister she has to support?! Jesus christ give the bitch a tip and never do less than a FIVE when tipping queens people A DOLLAR IS THE SAME THING AS A QUARTER! 41. India Ferrah: Oh god I worry saying mean things about India because I dont want to hurt her feelings as worry that she TEETERS ON SANITY but she to me is what drag is WHEN I DONT LIKE DRAG. Her “combat contour” is brutalist to the point of being vulgar. To me her styling concept is PUT EVERYTHING YOU OWN ON NOW BECAUSE MAYBE WE NEED TO RUN OUT THE DOOR AFTERWARD. I mean its the 8 foot braid with a giant bow, and the top hat, and the body stocking, and the thigh high boot, and the breast plate, now a giant necklace to cover the edge of the fake boobs, now put a spider SUCKLING THE TIT of the breastplate, oh wait I have TWO BOOBS and I NEED ANOTHER SPIDER, now add a couple jewels to the eyes of the spider OH WAIT spiders have six eyes so add four more… now what about belts, I only have TWELVE…. 40. Mimi Imfurst: OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!?! She fucking CAPTURED India ferrah like some kind of MOUNTAIN TROLL?!?!? That was one of the most amazingly insane moments on TV ever! Then when Raven WENT IN on her in All Stars …omg I have that segment saved on my phone and just watch it when I need to feel “myself” again. Mimi on the cruise actually did the best read on the Michelle Visage roast. Shes smart but lets her inner voices get the best of her. We all have inner voices but I feel chubby people are chubby because the voices are louder. Im not even saying it to be a dick but it seems like with people who suffer from body issues LIKE ME the inner voices are so LOUD you can see them reacting to them on their face. Hang around me long enough and you'll totally see this. This is called being a function insane person! 39. Morgan McMichaels: Ahhh the Morgan McMonkey! Did you know shes actually Scottish, like from Scotland? That didnt come off on the show. Ok Morgan to me is interesting because as a person Morgan is just not my kinda person, she even has a SUPERMAN TATTOO and you know how much I hate Superman as to me he is the OPPOSITE OF CREATIVITY and a HERO TO SHEEP but that does NOT discount her talents. Ive seen her perform live and shes VERY good. Do I want to hang with her NO, is she a solid talent YES. I met her once and she tried to tell me she doesnt eat pork because PIGS DONT HAVE KIDNEYS. She said this while chain smoking cigarettes and drinking heavily… hmmmm. I dont even know how to organize the judgements I have. All this said I feel if Morgan was your friend you could trust her and shed definitely not be afraid of taking a hit to defend you. 38. April Carrion: She is the best example of being chopped too soon. Shes very talented and pretty and makes her own looks and I respect her abilities. She had more to offer as Ive seen other looks of hers and they were good. Too much of a shrinking violet to survive a comepetition. Shes quite lovely Im surprised she hasnt got some rich old benefactor. 37. Nicole Paige Brooks Oh my fuckin god Nicole Paige Brooks?!?!? Nicole is so important as she is SO MANY THINGS. Nicole is the ESSENCE OF REGIONAL TALENT. She is THE small town coke head faggot drag queen WE ALL KNOW. My mom would have had her on PROBATION. The spirit that has possessed Nicoles body is an ancient spirit which haunts every rural gay bar! Remember how she had the hots for Raven and also had FRECH TIP TOENAILS?!…That BODY built EXCLUSIVELY by COCAINE. Ugh.. Ive never even seen Nicole but I know her sooo well. Nicole has that IVE BEEN TO PRISON and ALSO HAVE CHILDREN and ALSO HAVE A CLOSETED BLACK BOYFRIEND vibe that is SO PURE. Nicole is the queen who marches in the regional gay pride parade wearing flat sandals and a bikini and ACCEPTS TIPS while she does it! Nicole might also work at BEST BUY when “O.D” (out of drag). and when in drag theres also the worry that she might ACTUALLY O.D. Nicole is important. 36. Carmen Carrera: Ok Carmen is from Jersey where its NOT EASY to be a gay soul. Carmen once tried to tell me its ok that straight guys call you a faggot there because its not an isult its just what you are… EEEESSSSHKKK That is some HARDCORE Stockholm Syndrome. I could say more but its none of my damn business. Im not crazy about Carmen because I think shes made some choices based on where shes from but thats none of my damn business so I’ll shut the fuck up. To me Carmen is an example of an unfortunate situation. Ive had to deal with those hardened Jersey boys as a kid and as a tender gay boy its NOT A NICE THING and it would have been easier for me if I was just a girl too. Yes shes pretty, I wish her happiness. If I was raised where she was maybe I would have killed myself. In a way she sorta did I guess but also rebirthed herself.. maybe I need to give her more credit. Im going to add this. Most of us have to deal with being a "faggot" in a straight world and deal with it however we choose. I for example fetishisize it as for me its a safe place thats at least exciting as its FIERCE to have your hot husband call you a faggot as he bangs your puss hole out. At least that way youre dealing with the anxiety in a safe place and its HOT its also a lot easier than getting a sex change, pretending it never happened, and siding with your abusers in an effort to make the best of a bad situation. Maybe Ive made the wrong choice, see instead of siding with them and changing my sex I went punk and just write horrible things about them on St Patricks day and work out a lot so I can intimidate them on the street. SIDENOTE I have NEVER had someone make an anti gay comment to me when they're by themselves, have you ever noticed that? The comments are only made when youre out numbered... fuckin pussies. 35. Jiggly Caliente: Jiggly is real. 34. Victoria "Porkchop” Parker: Porkchop must be worshipped as she was sacrificed for all our sins. 32. Ivy Winters: Nobody ever put it together that Ivy Winters looks almost identical to Grace Jones AND Jean Kasem. That is POWERFUL MAGIC. Too bad she didnt know it either because if she channeled that spirit she could have won this thing so damn easy. 31. Pearl: 31. Tatiana: The day Tati steps away from low brow nineties references and learns to kick is the day Tati advances much farther. She NEVER uses her legs and her legs are AMAZING?! I wish she woulda had the self confidence to get tougher on Raven when Raven attacked her on her season because it was so clear that Raven was operating out of total jealousy being both have great beauty but for Tati it was effortless and for Raven its four hours of incredibly skilled painting. Tati was too green to have that wisdom. If she had it…ooooohhhhh it woulda been FUHEEEEIRCE! 30. Laganja Estranja: Oh god… I dont have the mental capacity at this point to go into the psyche of Laganja…Laganja is so important. Laganja is the litmus for bad faggotry because shes ACTUALLY TALENTED, shes got an amazing body, but OH GOD shes a nightmare. You can tell her parents felt guilty and coddled and spoiled their baby gay into a place where the only way she now knows how to operate is to be a needy indulged victim. Her comedy routine with the old people was a SURREALIST MASTER PIECE. Get off drugs laganja, they dont make you cool and needing the crutch of a vice does not a personality make. 29: Jinkx Monsoon: Does anyone else remember how bad she was at the beginning of her season??? She got the ONLY edit and they spun her into a storyline where theres was no way she could loose. Ive seen this storyline somewhere and it was called PRETTY IN PINK. They basically realized she both Molly Ringwalds character AND the Ducky character at the same time and spun a storyline for her to win because they hadnt a queen like her yet. She is talented, not my kinda talent but whatevs, to me shes the MACARONI ART of drag. She woulda been my friend first year of art school but then you have to change schools because you find out she has a crush thats a touch much on you and its weird because you thought you were just good friends. 28. Tyra Sanchez: In person I think Tyra might be the most beautiful of all the queens actually. You won't believe this but its true, she's a stunner. Too bad she just wants to be the best Beyonce, and not the best Tyra. Tyra, you be TYRA because Trinity K already does a waaaaaaaaay better Beyonce to be honest and youre actually so good on your own if you just owned YOURSELF youd be extraordinary. Its a shame she doesnt have the insight or desire to be HERSELF. Isnt that INSANE??? Its why nobody likes her, because SHE doesnt like her?! 27. Alexis Mateo: When you read her name do you also read it with a lisp? I do! Alexis is a sweet person whom I really appreciate and is also a victim of the pageant system. Pageant girls suffer from not fully grasping why the pageant system is bad. Ladies, we dont think YOU are bad, we think youre victims of a horrible oppressive system that wishes to put women into a structure of something like a DOG show. THIS IS DEGRADING NOT ONLY TO YOU BUT TO ALL FEMALES. It attempts to organize the female sex into ONE SINGULAR IDEAL based on the values of MEN and thats FUCKED UP. To organize females into ONE SINGULAR IDEAL is HORRIBLE and ROTTEN. It DEVALUES any ability that men might see as something THEY have to deal with and DENIES ABILITIES and STRENGTH to women creating an oppressive structure for females to operate in. Its GROSS, dont buy into it, its not cool! 26. Shannel: I know you dont agree but Shannel is important. Shannel wears VON DUTCH HATS. Shannels best friend is the WHISPERING FACE in the mirror that tells her to believe insane things. Shannel has THE BEST EYES of all contestants. Shannel belongs to a mentally ill race of people known as SHOW FOLK. Shannel thought JUGGLING while walking down the runway would be IMPRESSIVE. Shannel paid FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS for that garment and Shannel paid TOO MUCH. Shannel WAS NOT ELIMINATED... SHE CHOSE TO LEAVE!….. Shannel is important. OK the TOP TWENTY FIVE IS SERIOUS BUSINESS. These are the APEX PREDATORS!!! Have you noticed as the list has gone on the comments have gone from VENOMOUS and PUNISHING to RESPECTFUL ACCOLADE and thats because as the list goes the talent increases and Im grateful that these people are inspiring, not wasting my time, and are championing values that need to be championed! When I typed this I just got so excited I moved my ENTIRE BODY on top of my little clear desk chair and Im sitting here typing like a GARGOYLE! Every single one of these queens are a WINNER and I mean that. Im not just saying this shit, each one of these queens is a SOLID ARCHETYPE and depending on your own values you could place most of them in the top five and have a SOLID ARGUMENT. This list however is MY opinion and MY VALUES so this is much more about ME than THEM of course. Honestly every single queen on this entire list is a talent and deserves respect for making the effort!... yes even Phi-phi. To be in the top twenty five however means you can STAND YOUR GROUND AND OWN YOUR OWN CROWN. Remember this is MY list. Youll understand reading this list I value creativity and HEIGHT more than anything. Being fishy doesnt count for much to me and if youre dumb and dishonest it aint gonna work out…. Here are THE MOST IMPORTANT QUEENS OF RUPAULS DRAG RACE!!! 25. Jessica Wild: AHAHAHAHAHAH HAHAH How the FUCK did Jessica Wild make the top list?! FUCK YES MISS JESSICA you MADE IT!! Ahahah this is WONDERFUl. I secretly admit I LOVE Jessica. Ill go so far to say shes almost like a KINDER EN ESPAñOL version of Alyssa! Jessica live is FUN and shes VERY KIND. I met her and she was a doll. Jessica is GOOD VIBES. I can totally hang with Jessy. Is she creative? NOPE. Is she Edgy? NOPE. Is she fierce… actually she kinda is???!. Shes a good person who you can tell HONESTLY LOVES DRAG and has fun doing it and THAT is why she made top 25! Shes a pure soul who enjoys what she does and that its the SPIRIT and HONESTY rarely found on EARTH! 24. Max: Max CLEARLY is really into Kristen Mcnemany. Max served us upper middle class white privilege. She was NOT bound by the oppressive low class moral standards of gender and sexuality! Max allowed herself to be flat chested and have GREY hair and this says IM WEALTHY AND EDUCATED ENOUGH NOT TO HAVE TO PLAY BY A MANS RULES AND BE A BIMBO YOU POOR PEOPLE?! Max was well read and Max is probably the most well travelled person in the semi mid west sorta shitty small to medium sized city in which I imagine she is from NEXT TO HER SISTER that was in THE PEACE CORPS (I imagine). I bet Max went to a college that was previously ONLY FOR GIRLS. Off the show Max really gave some fantastic editorial moments. I appreciated Max, she was refreshing. 23. Naomi Smalls: The Praying Mantis of drag! Naomis skeleton is the best of all the girls and thats why shes here. TALL and THIN is SO IMPORTANT. She actually was a nice person and very creative too. I don't like how people discounted her, she was far more creative than most of these people. 22. Milk: Milk is kinda like Max but not as annoying as a person and more “boy aware". Like I imagine sitting on train with Max might be tedious as her affectations are what got her chopped, and Milk though shes a touch WASPY for my tastes is actually cool and smart and you could share and laugh with her. Milk was MY club name in the 90s so thats interesting as were both tall white people I guess that name just gets handed to you. Milk is sorta the Sandra Bernhardt of RPDR to me but maybe its just the STRONG NOSE. I liked Milks Pinnochio A LOT but if I remember correctly she used the same wig or a pair of shoes a few times and that DOES get a deduction. She was REAL "I have a mom who went to college and shes tall and for my birthday she bought me an AFGHAN (the dog)." . SMART WHITE PEOPLE LIFE… basically everyone I went to college with. 21. Joslyn Fox: Jossy Fox is not trying to be anything she isnt and that is her refreshing appeal. Jossy shops at Tj Maxx and has lunch at Panera because she used to work there and still gets a discount because her fag hag never left despite making a lot of lateral moves that took her nowhere. If I had kids Id hire Jossy to babysit them. Jossy asked to have my husband visit her at her dining table on the drag cruise, BUT NOT ME. 20. Willam: I really should have put Willam at a higher ranking place simply because shes a class act and one of the only queens whos never asked for a discount and buys my clothes. She is the one queen who decided to play by her own rules which sorta bit her in the ass ALMOST, but shes also one of the only queens who has her own career outside of RPDR. I like Willam, shes distant and calculating, but so am I. 19. Ongina: Ongina is important because shes the first one to show that to be successful on the show its not about your elaborately constructed artifice that you might THINK is what makes people like you, but about the REAL YOU you fear to show others that is what makes people like you and this TEENY BEING had the balls to do it. Ongina is all about the live performance as shes a total charmer. She can dance in the palm of your hand and sleeps in a walnut shell at night. Her charm is her human connection that you dont get from most performers and you can't really get from TV. 18. Manila Luzon: Manilla gives the best costumes in drag styling. Her puppet faces are great, but ONE TIME USE, so shes a little for the kiddies and straight people who only see her once and dont follow drag so thats why she isnt higher for me. Remember if youre top 25 youre iconic! Im just organizing MY VALUES here so its not about these queens abilities but more about MY PERSONAL AGENDA and how I would ORGANIZE WORLD VALUES should I be given the chance…. (echoing Skeletor laugh) 17. Latrice Royale: Latrice is the spirit of America. If you dont like Latrice YOU ARE ISIS. Watch her performance at the season finale where Violet wins, its sooo darn good. Id love to put her farther up but I cant because she only wears THE SAME PAIR OF SHOES with every look. Lady… lay out some coins stop “living poor”. The moment you spend the dough to move yourself forward YOU ACTUALLY MOVE FORWARD. Stop living in a world where you cant afford shoes, break out of that mindset where youre worried to spend a little cash because you might not have it. LIVE RICHLY…YOU CAN AFFORD SHOES. That said remember CREDIT IS NOT CASH BITCH, do NOT use a credit card pretend you have the fantasy of the security of wealth, but I KNOW you at least have 49.99 for a plus size pair of PLEASERS! 16. Katya. The first time I saw Katya I thought TOTAL FORMER COKE HEAD... and I was right. Thats not a read its just the vibes. I think shes very smart and funny and her finale “read ya” was the best of al of them BUT she got a TOTAL SWEETHEART EDIT BECAUSE ALASKA WAS SLAUGHTERING EVERYONE so they needed to make it seem at least a LITTLE like a competition (though detox was like on another level) but I REALLY dont like that FORCED self deprecation and FAKE NICE LAUGH she gives people ESPECIALLY Trixie.. Stop GIFTING her that reaction, we all see right through it! It comes off like less of a laugh and more of an APOLOGY for existing and you dont need to do it youre fierce, just stop. Before you get too big a head though I have to be a good person and let you know your finale look on All Stars was the THIRD worst look ever to go down the runway behind Serena and Cynthia. Don't believe me???.. check out the hemline. 15 Jujubee: Out of all the queens I think if I had to spend an extended period of time with them Id choose Juju. Shes smart and funny and hopefully that would give me the opportunity to teach her about STYLING because she needs some help. Damn your looks are CHEAP woman. They sell Vogue at the GROCERY STORE!? Im not even asking for the far superior Italian Vogue, Im just saying SHITTY COMMERCIAL GROCERY STORE FASHION MAGAZINE VOGUE. Pick it up and then look at your clothes and figure out the difference. I actually think Juju might be the funniest queen even over Bianca. Shes certainly one of the smartest, and dont forget her library reading was really good. 14. Trinity K. Bonet: I imagine youre suprised at Trinity ranking so high up. Trinity is something I respect.. QUIET CONFIDENCE. Trinity was too damn well mannered to get as far as she should have in the competition and the reason why is Trinity K is the personality type I really respect who is someone who is QUIET and TALENTED. She lets her talents do the talking and unfortunately for good tv you cant just sit there and wait to slay on the runway, you have to have provide soundbytes and dramtic facial gestures for gifs etc. Trinity respectfully minded her own damn business and let her abilities do the talking and I REALLY like that. I went on that nightmarish drag cruise and hands down the best performance was Trinity it was about a ten minute Beyonce number and it was BETTER than Beyonce. It was FANTASTIC and im not even a Beyonce fan. I also think shes very beautiful and has a total Angela Basset quality to her which Im charmed by. Trinity was well mannered and polite and I kinda wanted to be her friend because someone like that benefits from someone like me who isnt afraid to maybe NOT be so polite should the rare occasion call for it. I guess Bianca kinda saw that too. I kinda think for some weird reason Im sweet on her because Tina Turner was my first concert at 8 years old, which I won the tickets to answering Tina Turner Triva on the radio, and that remeinds me of my mom who I went to the concert with and so therefor I want to protect this “good woman”. 13. Nina Flowers: Speaking of good women the next is Nina Flowers. I have NEVER heard ONE person say ONE bad thing about Nina and the multiple times Ive met her she is KIND AND LOVELY. Nina endured that entire CONFLAMA of SEASON 1 and DIDNT EVEN GET THE PALTRY 10k she deserved?! THEN Nina got CURSED with being paired with RAVING MAD WOMAN TAMMIE BROWN and ROLLED WITH IT without complaint. In fact if you watch All Stars 1 instead of complaining Nina handles her like a loving mother who has a RETARDED CHILD who YELLS A LOT. Speaking of YELLING RETARDED PEOPLE one time my husband and I were in Miami and we bought BAD PILLS (is there any other kind in Miami) and were TWACKED OUT ASSHOLES and ran into her and we COULD NOT SHUT THE FUCK UP and she was SO TOLERANT, AND SO NICE, AND SO UNBOTHERED that we almost wondered if we PASSED FOR SANE. Looking back WE DID NOT, Nina was just really nice. Nina is also a great Dj who really gets that CUNT FACTOR and makes for a great night out. 12 Miss Fame: Drag being an art form that relies so heavily on the magic of transformation being the best make up artist of all the queens certainly gets you TOP THREE placement. Too bad Miss Fame is the SECOND BEST MAKE UP ARTIST of Rupauls drag race. If this was a BIOLOGICAL female make-up challenge Fame would be the best, but DRAG MAKE UP is a VERY different art form. Fame had fantastic looks and a greatly appreciate her. I just wish the brains matched the visuals because theyre SO sharp. She really is the Linda of RPDR. Linda was my SECOND choice of the Supermodels, my first was Nadja so you can see where Im coming from. To me alien proportions and snowgress fantasies trump “classic fashion perfection”. 11. Chi Chi DeVayne : Chi Chi Devayne is THE SPIRIT OF DRAG. Chi chi is POOR AS FUCK and still managed to teach herself how to do BACKFLIPS IN HEELS. THERE IS NO REASON FOR ALL OF US NOT TO BE ABLE TO DO THE SAME BUT WE CANNOT! She is THE DRAG ASSASSIN. I respect her SO much. Imagine if she was given the same opportunities any of us in the North East of the United States were given?! When I was a little kid I wasnt rich either but I feel in North Eastern America you can receive a great education and you dont have to be wealthy at all. A good education is just kind of built into the psyche just like our PURITANICAL JUDGEMENT. I mean as a kid I grew up in a tiny single parent home next to a pond and it certainly wasnt GLAMOROUS but if I felt like it my 8 year old self could wander over to the neighbors house which was basically THE ADDAMS FAMILY MANSION to me which belonged to the professor who established the local community college and Id just sit there in his living room while he and his wife watched JULIA CHILD Id point at the random objects hed collected from around the world and ask “Whats that?!” and hed reply “That is a TURKISH BULLWHIP!” FIERCE?! ..with that information alone not only did I learn of exotic locations I never heard of I knew I TOO wanted to go there AND had the ability too. Something tells me being from Louisianna Chi Chi didnt have the opportunity to learn how to cook LONDON BROIL (I still remember Julia saying “Ooh this roast is SPITTING at me) while sitting in the dark at a baby grand piano while a Grandfather clock gonged in the background like these people did. It would be VERY EASY to be an angry bitter person coming from her situation and instead Chi Chi took it upon herself to excel to the best of her abilities and BOY HAS SHE. I feel Chi Chi was THE BEST when it came to Lipsynch for your life. All she needs is 12 months, a handful of those McDonalds gift certificates you got at Halloween, a stack of VHS tapes of STYLE with ELSA KLENSCH, 6 National Geographic magazines, and everyone dies. Chi Chi is FIERCE. 10 Chad Michaels: Being the number one Cher impersonator in the world gets you top ten placement forever. Its not debatable its DRAG LAW. 9.Tammie Brown: Tammie Brown is an UNCONTROLLABLE FORCE OF NATURE. Tammy is the SWIRLING POWER OF CHAOS. GRAVITY DECIDES TO LEAVE WHEN TAMMIE IS AROUND! Tammies superpower is that she holds no power unto her own but EVERYONE ELSES POWERS ARE RENDERED USELESS WHEN SHE WALKS IN THE ROOM. NO QUEEN has any power over Tammie and for THAT ALONE she gets top ten placement. Have you ever seen those crazy cat videos of cats reacting to people who throw a cucumber on the ground? If you havent, check them out, but in a nut shell cats are for some reason TOTALLY FREAKED OUT by a cucumber sitting on the ground. They go from acting relatively sane to COMPLETELY BIZARRE at the toss of a cucumber... well TAMMY IS THAT CUCUMBER. 8. Bianca Del Rio: Bianca is a hard working professional and a talent and Im glad we have her on “our” side as I cant think of any straight comedian who could beat her in a "read off". She doesnt particularly check any of my boxes as what she is Im not super into but you cant deny her abilities. Shes the sharpest tack. My friend Bradford hired her for a dinner and it was fine and fun and all and as she was walking out the door my NUMB NUT husband brings up “but what about the movie youre making?” this of course lead her to go on about how shes raising money etc so then BRADFORD THE ASSHOLE makes everyone say how much theyre going to donate to her film putting me on the spot to donate 500 dollars to the fucking crappy movie?! It was well shot but UGH LADY wheres the funny? I paid FIVE HUNDRED GOD DAMN DOLLARS FOR THAT MOVIE?!?! FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS….. FUCK.... thats TWO tickets to see CHER?!?!?!? 7.Sharon Needles: When Sharon first came out I BOUGHT IT, literally, I bought the t shirt which was secrelty packed as a GLITTER BOMB.. FUCKING CUNT…She really gave us hope and spoke to so many and was a creative and funny star. Shes a great talent who has done some amazing looks. Unfortunately shes become super sour and nasty and nobody wants to work with her and former fans are made uncomfortable to be around her. Sharon Needles is THE BEST DRAG QUEEN nobody wants to be around. 6. Violet Chachki: Im pretty sure Violet was trained by a SITH LORD or something. Shes CURIOUSLY YOUNG to be so professional and SO on point and just soooo good. God I hated the idiot RPDR fan base who talked shit about her simply because they couldnt relate to her because she was confident in her abilities. A wolf does NOT consult the sheep as to what to have for dinner!?! Im sorry but thats NOT something to make apologies for and its CERTAINLY not something you need to change. Nobody should have to dumb themselves down for the masses and Violet has not. She consistently DOMINATES THEM with her BITCH GODDESS self and Im SOOOO THANKFUL FOR THAT. This icy goddess holds the title for the number one AND number two AND number three best gowns on RPDR history. Dont go against Violet you WILL loose. 5. Alaska: Alaska broke all the rules by being HER OWN CREATURE. You cant pin down Alaska as one specific thing. Shes is an entity unto her own and that is so important to recognize. Shes also maybe the smartest queen of all of them. Her drag is a critique of drag itself which makes her a more evolved creature compared to “lesser” queens. Like all these top five shes really carved out PERSONALITY in her drag persona. Shes maybe made me laugh more than any other queen.The only “negative” I can think of is I dont like her interest in nails, seems like something India Ferra would be into. Its sorta weird that she named herself Alaska when the biggest gay icon in Spain and many other Spanish speaking nations is Alaska but shes from Pittsburg, not Madrid. 4. Alyssa Edwards: Oh fuck is Alyssa Edwards important! The DON KNOTSS of Drag Alyssa is sorta just like Texas from which she hails… BIG AND WEIRD THINKING AND despite being the essence of AMERICA its also ITS OWN ENTITY and by its own design is flawless and also VERY FLAWED! Remember when ALyssa first started and she was mean and people did not like her?! This is important to recognize because Alyssa HOOKED US with a very special chemistry of herself as a real person and this SWIRLY KOOKOO TOWN that her psyche exists in where shes the MAYOR, THE RICHEST LADY, THE NOSEY NEIGHBOR, AND THE BEAUTY QUEEN! Shes all those things and we get to see them all exist in every gesture. The gif of her negotiating a sip on an extra long straw was just as responsible for us falling in love with her as was her UNSELFAWARNESS (is that a word?) upon the HARD REVEAL of her BACKROLLS. Those lips and eyes are insanely MAGNETIC but all of it would be only half as magnetic if we didnt know what a LOOSEY GOOSEY she is?! You KNOW that Alyssa PERFORMS FOR NOBODY when shes by herself…. OFTEN. Alyssa I think is the only queen Ive ever hired and she got out of a cab by herself in FULL DRAG wearing like a TEDDY and a SHEER DRESSING GOWN and walked down the street in broad daylight asking my assistant if the MEXICAN RESTAURANT ON THE CORNER was where she was PERFORMING?!?! Alyssas personal styling is: “Dress, not particularly expensive shoe, AND PIECE OF THING ON HER HEAD- but NOT a complete thing on her head just a PART of something on her head! Its the VAGUE ALLUSION that this is part of MAYBE SOMETHING GREATER, or maybe shes been to SPAIN, or maybe she shoplifts at CLAIRES BOUTIQUE?! Alyssa is an America treasure! 3. Raven: Raven is JEALOUS BEAUTY. RAVEN IS EVERY FIERCE VILLAINESS THAT EVER EXISTED. Raven VERY EASILY could be my number one BUT IM LEARNING TO LOVE MYSELF and Im not going to SIT HERE and WAIT to be loved by someone I adore as they DENY MY EXISTENCE simply because THEY THEMSELVES are incapable of being loved. I already DID THAT SHOW its called ME AND MY DAD and thanks but over a lifetime as a child I sat there on the couch waiting for him to show up, which he often DID NOT, as I hoped that MAGICALLY ONE DAY this person you adore is suddenly going to take interest in you. GUESS WHAT… IT AINT GONNA HAPPEN!!! I might love Raven but RAVEN CANT LOVE BACK and instead of being MAD (like I was for a lifetime with my own dad) Im going to recognize that I dont hate this person at all, in fact this VILLAIN is a HERO to me and though I wish theyd be capable of liking me back theyre NOT and THATS OK. Im not the bad guy for that, and neither is Raven, and neither is my dad. Its something they cant do and MAYBE someday they will and if so THATS GREAT but until then Im gonna love myself and put interest in people who reciprocate my feelings.This all may sound like I had some kind of ACTUAL relationsship with Raven WHICH I HAVE NOT but Ravens entire DRAG CONCEPT HER VERY DRAG BEING is that story line to me. The even more twisted part is we love Raven BECAUSE shes cruel?!?! I think shes TREMENDOUS! Raven is THE EVIL QUEEN from Snow White, shes Alexis from Dynasty, shes Katra from She-ra. Raven IS jealous beauty. Raven is a cruel and powerful goddess and I LIVE for her. We have tried SO MANY times to hire her and it falls on dead ears. Shes cannot be bothered. She needs to GET BOTHERED because the reason why shes not an All Star is because she cant be. I mean I think its really because shes had a couple DUIs and theres no way a liquor company was gonna give 100k to a person who has 2 DUIS but you know what I mean.... Raven is also THE BEST DRAG MAKEUP ARTIST. All these future queens stand on Ravens trompe l’oeil bone structure. Ravens one word comments on fashion photo Ruview make me HOWL. Ravens astute observations are as sharp as her nose contour. Raven has the teeniest room for evolution spiritually I think JUST A TEENY BIT, like DONT CHANGE, but MAYBE get a LITTLE kind and Raven will be my number one and OH GOD I want her to be number one SO BAD. 2. Raja. Ok, now Im back to sitting on my tiny clear desk chair like a Gargoyle because its THE TWO MOST IMPORTANT QUEENS?!!?!? VERY SIMPLY without Raja Rupauls Drag Race would be MEXICAN TELEVISION! The show would be an FAR less elevated and be a GOOPEY SUNDAE of WIGS AND BOOBS AND WELL WORN DRESSES THAT SMELL LIKE B.O and ANGEL! Raja brings in references that lift the entire competition UP. Alyssa is Cosmopolitan but Raja is ITALIAN VOGUE AND NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC. Shes still the best runway walker of all the queens which is like MORE IMPORTANT THAN ANYTHING. In her single season she gave us gold robot, amazon tribes person, Marie Antoinette, and when she walked in first episode it was the most obvious time someone was CLEARLY the winner from MINUTE ONE. Raja is the PUBLIC TELEVISION OF DRAG RACE! A FUNDAMENTAL NECESSITY to the CLASS LEVEL of Rupauls Drag Race and without her the floor would drop out. LETS IMAGINE AN AFRICAN WATERING HOLE with baboons squeeling, zebras making their weirdo sounds that you would never expect to come from a horse, hippos eating, hyenas laughing and all of a sudden the GIRAFFE enters the scene and everyone SHUTS UP AND STARES… Well RAJA IS THAT GIRAFFE... and yes Shangela and Yarra Sofia are the babbons. We need LESS BABOONS and MORE GIRAFFES. If I HAD to make a negative critque Id say Id just like to see LESS POT and WINE references on her facebook page because when I read that I think she might be mildly depressed and I dont want that from this creative talent whom I adore! 1. Detox. DETOX IS CHARISMA. Detox IS the MUGLER woman. Thierry Mugler is what saved me in college. Mugler is clearly what has saved Detox as well. The first time I saw Thierry Muglers work was at a newsstand in VALENCIA CALIFORNIA at CalArts and his robot suit was on the cover of STERN magazine and I grabbed it, and some suburban TWAT MOM shot me side eye because the robot suit shows nipple and of course she disapproved that because she was JUDGEY UNTRAVELED TRASH. I looked inside at his work and I thought I WANT TO BE WHERE THESE PEOPLE EXIST?!?!? I actually brought the magazine to my mentor and said "I NEED TO BE HERE." Well Detox takes me to that place! I can relate to Detox. Were really similar in many ways, both of us have tried to manefest that Mugler construct as best as possible and through ANY means necessary. If Raven is the Evil Queen from Disneys Snow White, Detox is Maleficent! Both are SO MAJOR how do you pick?! Well I will tell you how! Remember how in my Raven rant I was saying I was going to learn to love myself well putting Detox first is learning to love myself! Why?! Because Detox is the EVIL QUEEN who MAKES GOOD. When Alvaro offered to pay both Detox and Raven to send me a little happy 40th birthday message Raven didnt respond, and DETOX DID and REFUSED TO TAKE MONEY. You know when Skeletor feels the spirit of Christmas in the Heman Christmas special?? Well SKELETOR DETOX. Shes the VILLAIN we all love with A HEART thats open to be loved. Detox is the DAD WHO SHOWS UP. Detox takes great measures to embody the values that mean so much to me. Its actually HARD to be this GOOD. She is SOFT AS NAILS but you still wanna FUCK HER?! She had TREMENDOUS sex appeal without being soft, amazing style without being trend driven, and shes a bitch goddess without being bitter. Detox is number one, Detox is the good mommy.

[slimacwrites]

Dance With Demons- Ch. 31- Boston

Killian Jones is fighting a losing battle with his vice and hiding it behind his music persona. Emma Swan is the cop who arrests him for it. But that isn't the first time the two of them have met. After Emma impulsively offers him her apartment to recover away from the tabloids, it also won't be the last. For her it's just giving someone a chance she never had. But can it be more? Read the rest here.

Warning: This chapter contains mentions of alcohol abuse.

Disclaimer: All aspects of Once Upon A Time belong to ABC and the show’s creators.

Header by the amazingly talented @shady-swan-jones

Killian had to press down on his leg to keep it from bouncing. Not that there was anyone around to see him but the Uber driver. But still, news traveled fast. Especially when a celebrity was involved.

And why would Killian Jones have anything to be nervous about.

He was about to return to the world of music properly, that radio interview over a month prior had been a teaser and he was about to go on live tv. His paycheck would take a massive climb and countless numbers of fans would soon be screaming his lyrics along with him in the biggest stadiums in America.

Everything was great.

Except for the fact that Killian Jones wasn’t anything like the persona now. And yet he had to be exactly what everyone expected. The radio wasn’t bad because people didn’t need to see him. He could do as he pleased so long as he sounded like sex, drugs and rock and roll. But on live tv? With a record deal and executives that expected very specific things?

Yeah, that was a different kettle of fish all together.

Because people would see. All those fans who knew every swaggering step, every smirk, even his preferred brand of black eyeliner- they would be watching. And noting if something was off.

So Killian Jones wasn’t nervous, but the person who wore his suit, Killian Jones, was.

Regina had already had his supplies, his chosen wardrobe, guitar, ear piece, everything, sent ahead to Boston with his gig man so that the guitar would be ready for the talk show he was performing on that afternoon. Which was probably a good thing because Killian was pretty sure he would have forgotten his guitar in his nervousness.

The Uber pulled up onto the tarmac of the private lot, slowing as they neared the private plane for Boston. Usually Killian would take a regular plane, not really fussed, but Regina had decided, and Killian had been not so secretly grateful, that Killian wasn’t ready for that kind of public exposure. His manager, bless her icy exterior, was going to protect him as long as she could. Though it was probably nice for her to have the help of his assigned protector, Emma, for the more hands on stuff.

It was obvious that Emma was looking forward to getting into the security job. She’d gone ahead of Killian, not that she’d stayed at his place the night before, but he had been texting her, so she could scope out the area and debrief with Regina. Killian actually looked forward to seeing Emma in her element, far away from the treatment in the precinct. It would be a glorious sight and one that did much to calm his frayed nerves.

Killian sucked in a deep breath before nodding to the driver and slipping out of the car, to-go coffee cup in hand. The stairs for the plane were down and Emma stood beside them, watching the flight crew carefully. She wore her hair tied up in a tight pony tail and a black polo embroidered with the Poison Apple logo in green just below her left shoulder. A gun was holstered to her hip in as non-flashy a holster as one could really get while still making sure people knew it was there. A little smile flicked up her lips when she noticed Killian arrive.

Killian crossed the tarmac to her, finally smiling for the first time that morning.

“Hello, lass,” he greeted, moving to kiss her.

Emma turned quickly, moving her arm as if she were ushering him inside the plane instead of returning the greeting. “Inside,” she murmured, lips barely moving. “There are paparazzi outside the gate. Someone got hold of your flight schedule.”

Killian gulped, trying to stop from turning immediately and running. Fuck. The protection he needed for Emma had nearly been blown, and would have been if it weren’t for how careful and aware she was. Would the paps think anything of the weird almost kiss?

Not when Killian Jones was a known flirt. With a deep breath Killian steeled his features and turned towards the metal fencing around the private airport. Sly grin in place, eyebrow climbing higher every second, Killian raised his coffee cup in a salute towards the place where cameras were not so subtly peaking from around bushes. At least this would give better pictures than whatever the awkward bob did and increase the likelihood of this planned picture being published in the magazines and gossip sites.

“Inside,” Killian muttered, feeling an uncomfortable tug, as if his muscles didn’t want to play this game. Didn’t want to smirk and wink and swagger. Oh, how he wished he’d taken up Victor’s offer and gotten some more anti-anxiety meds, those ones that worked in a panic attack. But he was already taking his SSRIs and there was this fear that as someone so prone to vice, introducing more meds, especially strong ones like he’d originally been taking for the immediate anxiety, would cause more trouble than fix.

Emma returned with a sharp nod before going back to watching everyone move around the plane. Killian climbed the stairs and took his seat. Regina raised a brow from her own.

“And how are we today, Mr. Jones?”

“Peachy,” he answered grimly, taking a sip of his now cold coffee.

“You forgot the eyeliner.” Regina held up a black pencil, offering it to him.

Killian cursed softly before taking the pencil and slipping to the tiny onboard bathroom. Killian Jones was never without eyeliner. It was part of the appeal, the image expected of him. Without the eyeliner he looked more like himself, more vulnerable. Without the eyeliner people could get in. Without the eyeliner people were reminded of the band he was once part of, with a brother and friends. A few slicks of black khol and Killian Jones had arrived. Almost as if a mask had slid into place.

Killian exited the bathroom just as Emma came on board, the staircase folding up into a door behind her.

“Morning, lass,” Killian greeted, reaching out and catching her hand.

This time Emma smiled properly and squeezed his hand. “Morning, Killian.”

“That’s better,” he grinned, kissing her cheek quickly before taking his seat. Emma slid down beside him, buckling up.

“You doing okay?” she asked, leaning down beside him to murmur in his ear while Regina started typing away on her laptop.

“Ask me later?”

She gave him a weak smile. “How little sleep did you get?”

“Three hours?” Killian put in with a self-depreciating shrug. “How can you tell?”

“I actually used to be a detective,” Emma grinned back. A wave of gratitude shot through him that this guard position had been open and that Regina had agreed for her to take it. Emma was joking about her time as a detective. And it wasn’t self-depreciating or bitter.

“Really?” Killian returned, happy to go with her mood on the subject. “I didn’t know that.”

Emma rolled her eyes. “You haven’t been having coffee at all anymore and here you are with a grande.”

“A ginger shot just wasn’t going to cut it.”

“You should sleep now,” Emma suggested, interlacing her fingers with his and moving her neck, as if to create a space for him. Killian watched for a moment before nodding, that weary anxiety weighing heavily on his bones. In private things were easier. Easier to just be. With a sigh Killian settled his head against her shoulder and allowed the whirr of the plane engine and the warmth of Emma’s body to lull him to sleep.

The rest of the morning went by in a buzz. Killian managed to sleep the entire trip to Boston, as well as the car ride to the TV station through traffic. Sleep was an oblivion, enough to pull him out of the stress, especially when Emma sat next to him, unable to hold his hand in the public Uber but only a few inches away. Once they reached the television station, Emma shook his shoulder, rousing him.

“There’s a crowd gathered.” Emma’s voice was tight.

“What?” Killian asked blearily, peering out the tinted window. Sure enough there were at least twenty teenage girls and a few harried adults standing outside of the back door to the station.

Fuck.

“It will be okay,” Emma whispered. “I’m here. The door’s unlocked and we’ll get through it.”

The Uber next to them holding Regina parked and his manager got out, sweeping inside without a problem, no doubt throwing one of her famous glares at the girls. Or they just didn’t know who she was. But they knew who Killian was.

Emma spoke into the mic hanging from the earpiece she wore, listening to the response. Killian wanted to ask her who she was contacting but he was too busy watching the girls with their signs. They probably wanted him to sign those bristol board posters. Killian’s hands shook at the thought, forcing him to grasp at the black denim jeans he wore. How much of an asshole was he for not wanting to sign autographs and take pictures? Oh how much easier this was when he was halfway to the bottom of a bottle already. At least then if he decided he couldn’t pretend to be Killian Jones that day he was too far gone to care.

“I can’t talk to them today,” Killian whispered, catching Emma’s attention quickly. “I can’t pretend anymore than I already have to.”

“It’s okay,” she replied. “I can be a bitch for you.”

Killian had to snort out a laugh, but the sound was quickly stopped when Emma climbed out of the car. She quickly hurried around the front of the car to Killian’s side, pulling the door open.

“Deep breath, and mask on. We’ll be inside in thirty seconds.”

Killian shut his eyes for a moment. It was way easier to pretend to be sex drugs and rock and roll when he was never sober. Killian pushed himself out of the car, nearly climbing back in when the crowd started to scream and push closer to him.

“Mr. Jones has no time to sign autographs today.” Emma put herself between the mass and himself when they didn’t stop, hands up. “Back off,” she barked, hand dancing over the revolver at her hips. A few of the girls and all the parents stopped, eyeing her warily. But not all. Again, Killian had to stop himself from running. Or spilling the entire truth so they would just back off.

“Back off. I won’t ask again.” The vitriol in her voice made even Killian glance at her. It sounded how she’d talk to a criminal, maybe someone attempting to run her through with a knife to get away. “I will have you all arrested.” That got all their attention and the remaining girls to stop.

“Thank you,” Emma answered, softer now. She reached back to grasp Killian’s elbow and guided him through the crowd with no issue. Oh, Emma was glorious. He wished he wasn’t quite so anxious and could actually appreciate it but he was too busy trying to keep smirking and throwing the occasional wink at the fans.

A few moments later, Emma was pulling open the big steel station door and allowing him into the relative quiet of the station. The speaker in Emma’s ear crackled and she stopped to listen before leading him further up the hallway.

“Your dressing room is up here. Regina’s already in a meeting getting everything set up.”

Killian just nodded, following Emma up the cement lined hallway, made to isolate sounds for the studio. Halfway up the hallway was a black door with his name taped to it. She opened the door and moved aside so Killian could enter. Killian slipped into the dressing room and sunk down onto the nearest chair, an old upholstered thing. Emma shut the door and grabbed a bottle of water on the counter with the rest of the rider requests Regina had sent in and handed it to him.

“I shouldn’t be in here but I just wanted to ask- how are you doing?”

Killian glanced up at her and sighed. “Are you sure I can do this?”

“Are you sure you can’t?” Emma returned, squatting down in front of him and placing her hands on his knees, warming and grounding.

“It’s just exhausting,” Killian answered truthfully.

Everything was exhausting. Out here, he felt like a lie. Killian only felt like himself when he was in his house or Emma’s apartment, no illusions between them. He didn’t want to put on those leather pants and the leering smile that he’d be furious if someone sent at Emma.

“You won’t always have to lie.”

“Everyone here wants something from me.” It was hard not to sound whining and he felt a bit bad about that. Because Killian knew he was lucky but he was just so tired of all this. Of the lies and the persona and not getting to figure out who he was. Because he wasn’t who he was before the alcohol, too much had happened since, but he also wasn’t the man Emma had pulled off that boat two months prior. Eight weeks wasn’t a long time to be sober- well it felt like an eternity- but it also was so short a time to figure himself out after years of floating and fumbling.

Emma nodded, pulling him back to the present. “But think about this- tonight it will be just me and you in the hotel. No one else to need anything.”

Killian raised a brow. “You and me in a suite?”

Emma grinned and Killian had to study her carefully because it actually seemed like she was implying something beyond just sleeping. And damn, didn’t that make his stomach flip with anticipation. And also a bit of hesitation and confusion. They’d slept together a few more times the past week and each night seemed to get more difficult. Each night they seemed to come together and spoon quicker. Each night he slept more soundly but dreamed more vividly. Each morning he woke harder. And not just because he was always a bit sleepy and spent too much time watching Emma sleep.

“Oh?” Killian asked, slightly breathless.

“Oh,” Emma answered, standing. “Get ready. You’re on in thirty.” She pressed a kiss to his lips and left, Killian’s groan following her out.

Damn temptress.

The two of them alone, in a fancy hotel room. A mini-vacation of sorts. With Emma clearly interested in trying. Trying being the operative word because Killian had no idea what he was capable of. Killian groaned again, this time for a different reason.

Emma had saved him only to be the death of him.

Killian guzzled the water bottle before standing to change into the leather pants and black t-shirt with the rips in it that Regina had set out already. The leather pants didn’t go on quite as easily as they had before on tour, his legs having filled out a bit from all the running he’d done. At least this was one way to see the progress beyond a lack of a daily hangover. Killian would need to order new pants before tour because there was no way he was dancing around in these for three hours. Once he was dressed Killian mussed his hair so it flipped around like he’d just had really good sex, pulled the v-neck of his shirt even lower and then slipped into his heavy black boots again, singing to himself.

The leather and black costume helped. It almost made him feel like the person he was supposed to be, as if it were easier to pretend when he looked the part. Killian never could have pretended to be the rockstar in that yellow t-shirt he’d loaned Emma the week before. Not that anyone would have taken him serious in that.

A few minutes later there was a knock on the door. “Mr. Jones? You’re on in five.”

Killian sucked in a breath that may have been a gasp before grabbing another bottle of water and opening the door. A PA stood beside Emma, checking her schedule. She nearly squeaked when Killian appeared, eyes widening. Despite the anxiety flooding him, Killian had to grin. Emma caught his eye and rolled her own.

“This way,” the PA instructed after coughing into her hand, heat climbing her cheeks. Killian motioned for her to lead the way, Emma following into step beside him.

“Like what you see?” Killian whispered, raising a brow saucily.

“Enough that I’m glad Regina got us a big bed.”

Killian couldn’t respond because they’d entered the main station floor where he’d be performing. All he could do was sputter when Emma winked at him and moved to stand next to Regina off camera. Killian had to force himself to think about Regina riding a tricycle to stop himself from embarrassing himself. Because those leather pants were damn tight and didn’t hide anything.

Killian hadn’t had sex since the first time he met Emma, that time she threatened to shoot him, nearly three months prior. At first he hadn’t known why but he’d since come to realize that Emma had caught him off guard so much that morning that he started to question all his decisions. Including finding all those bar flies each night. And then everything else got in the way. Was this Emma’s way of saying she was ready? She wasn’t going to run? Or was she just as horny as Killian was? Either way, Killian really wanted to leave and go to the hotel and find out exactly what she was doing turning him on.

Killian grabbed his guitar, stood behind the mic, and looked towards where Emma stood, smiling a bit like the cat who got the cream. Oh, she was going to pay for the dangerous game she’d started.

The producer waved at him. “Twenty seconds Mr. Jones. Give us an intro then sing. We’ve an intro tape already playing.”

Killian nodded, he’d seen that a few days prior, a mix of the hosts thoughts and old clips of Killian’s tours and shows meant to tease the longer interview the next day on the morning show. It was standard but would please the fans and hopefully attract new with the clips of some of his best work- and gratuitous shirtless and tight pants images.

The producer pointed at him, before counting down from five on her fingers. When she pointed again, the light on the camera facing him came on and Killian stepped closer to the mic so that his lips nearly touched it.

“Good afternoon,” he purred, lowering his voice to the one he had heard equated to sex, accent thick and husky. “This is a song from my new album, called Chipped Tea Cup. Enjoy.” A quick wink at the camera before Killian started to strum. It wasn’t meant to be a sexy song, meant more as a sweet love song that so often attracted the fans to the album as a whole- he really should write a few new ones of those- but he wouldn’t be the man who created the Killian Jones persona if he couldn’t turn anything into an innuendo.

Especially when the most beautiful and sexy woman he’d ever had the pleasure of knowing was watching.

And apparently it worked because Emma’s face was red when he glanced at her halfway through the song. Killian didn’t know if he should be proud or nervous of the can of worms he’d opened. Or maybe bed sheets he’d turned down.

Once the song ended, Killian very intentionally licked his lips and smirked. The producer waved off the camera and then he was free, the day’s obligations over. When he glanced back at Emma she was shaking her head, biting her lip against the grin, hand flat against her chest.

“You’re bad,” Emma whispered when Killian had joined her again in the dressing room.

“You started it,” he responded.

“Care to end it?”

“You’re really serious about this?” Killian asked, the words coming out before he could stop himself.

Emma nodded. “I’ve been thinking a lot about it and we’re here and together and I’m not saying we fuck.” Killian snorted at her bluntness. “I’m just saying we explore. I mean, if you want to.” Emma shrugged and looked away.

Explore?

Relief filled Killian. No sex but still fooling around. It was still too soon for Killian to trust his body and Emma still seemed conscious of her chance to run. Maybe fooling around would be the fun thing to kick start things. They may have only been together for nearly two months, but, Killian would have fallen into bed far sooner before. Not that they weren’t in bed. But Killian would have been in bed in his birthday suit weeks ago. Hell, he and Milah had gotten it on a week after their first date. It was definitely time to see Emma shirtless.

Killian grasped her hand, pulling her closer. “Oh, I want to.”

“Good.” Emma kissed him hard and quick. “Now get ready. You have dinner and stuff to go to.”

“Oh, stuff alright.” Killian lunged to touch Emma’s behind but she dodged the hand with a wink before jumping out of the way and letting herself out the door. Once again Killian found himself groaning at his girlfriend.

And wishing he wore sweatpants all through dinner as he watched Emma slip food into her mouth, lips wrapping slowly around the fork as she smirked saucily when Regina wasn’t looking.

And cursing the Boston traffic.

And Regina for wanting to review the set list for the next day’s show in his room.

It was after nine before Regina left, leaving Killian sitting on the edge of the bed and Emma perched on the windowsill. The minute the door shut behind Regina, Killian stood and threw the door lock.

“Finally,” he sighed.

Emma laughed and stood, meeting him in the middle of the large suite, bare toes digging into the plush carpet. Killian stopped about a foot away, watching her.

“Do you still want to explore?” Killian asked, feeling like a virgin asking if he could cop a feel at the school dance. At least Emma seemed just as nervous, the two of them having sat on their arousal and thoughts for far too long.

Emma nodded, biting at her lip. “Yeah.”

“What if I can’t get hard? Or stay hard?” Killian asked, face heating up.

“What if I freak out? Or I missed a patch of hair shaving this morning?”

“I’m not trying to be funny,” Killian replied, scowling a bit.

Emma quickly shook her head. “I didn’t mean that, Killian” she answered, reaching to grab his hand. “I mean that, I’m scared too. I want this to be good. I’m at the point now where I want it to be so perfect I’m actually worried if I missed the hair on my ankle.”

Of course Emma was worried about the little things. She wasn’t used to this type of intimacy either. She was just as emotionally hurt as he was physically when it came to sex. But they’d never move on if they didn’t try.

“I won’t look at your foot,” Killian replied.

Emma grinned. “Good, because I was thinking that we could explore your body.”

“Mine?” Killian asked, nervous but also a bit excited.

Emma nodded. “I mean, you’re really worried about everything when it comes to sex. Asking you to go straight into that isn’t fair so I was thinking we could slowly start to build up your confidence in what you can do now that you’re getting healthy. And I think that taking care of you like this might help me to.” Emma muttered the last bit, still not totally comfortable in showing her emotions. It reminded Killian of the first day he was at her place, when she researched all the food he needed during recovery. Emma coughed. “Plus, I really want to give you a blow job.”

Killian felt his knees start to buckle. Oh. That sounded brilliant. Even better because Emma had actually thought about all this, about what they needed to keep moving forward in a physical way. How was he supposed to say no to something he wanted so badly, that also had the potential to really help him understand his new body?

Nerves still filling him but not enough to shove down his determination to do this with Emma, he raised a brow. “Well what are we waiting for?”

Emma grinned and shoved him onto the bed.