#kimyongsun

[quill-and-sunlight]

Yong never believed in growing up.

She believed in stars, though. And notebooks with glitter pens. And the way her laughter could bend the rules of the world just enough to make it hers. She was always moving, always dreaming, always flitting like her thoughts couldn’t catch up with her. Her room was a constellation of mess—books on mythology, stickers of K-pop idols, and posters of nebulae and skies she hadn’t yet touched.

And then there was Jess.

He was quiet—like the hum of a distant lighthouse. Always there. Always steady. He did her homework when she forgot. Brought her coffee when she crammed. Covered for her when she skipped class to lie on the rooftop and watch clouds drift like lost ships.

But then one day, Jess snapped.

“You can’t keep running away,” he said, her calculus homework in his hand, his voice brittle.

“I didn’t ask you to do it,” she said, defensively.

“You didn’t have to. You just expect the world to bend for you.”

Yong rolled her eyes. “Why are you being such a grandpa?”

“Because I care!” His voice broke. “Because you’re better than this, Yong. You’re smart, and bold, and kind when you let yourself be. But you can’t keep living in dreams.”

They fought again at dinner. Yonghee told her she was being selfish, that she was unfair to Jess, that someday Jess would leave and she wouldn’t know what she lost. Their parents agreed. For once, everyone was on the same page—except Yong.

She locked herself in her room and stared at the stars through her window. “If Peter Pan is real,” she whispered into the dark, “then take me with you. I want out.”

And someone was listening.

He came like a breeze through the curtains, as if he’d never truly been gone. Peter Pan. With a grin like a dare and wild in his eyes.

“You wished?” he said, offering a hand.

Yong grinned. “Took you long enough.”

“I’m her friend,” Jess said from behind the door, out of breath and still angry—but never too angry to protect her.

Peter cocked his head. “You’re not really the type.”

“I’m coming anyway.”

Peter shrugged. “Don’t slow us down.”

Neverland shimmered like memory and moonlight. It was everything Yong dreamed of—forests that sang lullabies, rivers of light, stars that twinkled mid-breath.

She bloomed there.

Jess, too, found himself strangely at home. The Lost Boys liked him—especially Wendy’s brothers, who declared him “the only adult worth trusting.” He built treehouses, told scary stories, and joined in sword duels with wooden spoons. The tribes welcomed him with open arms. Even Hook, theatrical and tired of fighting, offered him tea in the captain’s quarters.

“You’ve got a brain,” Hook said, swirling rum in a glass. “Ever considered piracy?”

Jess chuckled. “I like books and stable schedules.”

Hook sighed. “So boring. You’d make a great quartermaster, though.”

They talked philosophy and storytelling while the world outside buzzed with chaos.

But not everything sparkled in Neverland.

Yong was beautiful here. Radiant. Peter was smitten with her wildness, her daring. He promised her constellations, adventures, eternal youth.

“Stay,” he whispered in her ear. “Be my queen. No more expectations. No more growing up.”

Tinkerbell bristled. Wendy looked away. Tiger Lily, fierce and loyal, stood by Yong’s side, offering only quiet warnings.

“There’s a boy who loves you already,” she said, braiding shells into Yong’s hair.

“I know,” Yong replied. “But I don’t know if I’m ready to love him back.”

“You already do,” Tiger Lily smiled. “That’s why it hurts.”

Everything changed when Wendy was kidnapped.

Hook had grown restless again—tempted by the old game. He took Wendy from her cove, leaving behind only a blue ribbon and a mocking laugh.

Peter, enraged, summoned the Lost Boys and rallied the tribes. Even Brave Lion, the soft-spoken warrior who’d long loved Tiger Lily, took up his spear.

“We’ll rescue her,” Peter vowed, eyes aflame. “We’ll make Hook regret this.”

And Yong—fierce Yong—drew a blade for the first time and stood beside them.

But Jess didn’t fight.

He walked.

Into the ship.

Into Hook’s quarters.

And sat.

“You didn’t take Wendy for revenge,” he said.

Hook blinked. “Oh?”

“You’re lonely. And tired of being the villain in everyone else’s story.”

Hook sighed. “It’s exhausting.”

“Let her go. Come to the treehouse tonight. I’ll teach you chess.”

And Hook did.

Peter never understood it. But Jess always did—the way quiet could move mountains when chaos only cracked them.

That night, as the stars shimmered above a truce, Yong found Jess sitting under the tree with the Lost Boys curled around him like sleepy cats.

She sat beside him. Silent for a long while.

“I think I was falling in love with Peter,” she admitted. “Or maybe the idea of him.”

Jess didn’t speak.

She turned to him. “But it was you. It’s always been you.”

He looked at her, eyes wide.

“You remind me of home,” she whispered. “Of responsibilities. Of everything I wanted to run from. But you also remind me why I came back.”

He smiled. “Does that mean you’re ready?”

“Not yet,” she said. “But I’m not running anymore.”

They held hands beneath the stars.

And then she remembered Yonghee.

“My sister,” she said, eyes welling up. “She must be losing her mind.”

Jess nodded. “Let’s go home.”

They said goodbye in silence.

Peter smiled sadly. “You’d have been a great queen.”

Tinkerbell hugged Yong with trembling wings.

Tiger Lily whispered, “Come visit me in your dreams.”

And with a last handful of pixie dust from a surprisingly generous Tinkerbell, Jess and Yong flew home.

Years passed.

Real time. Not Neverland time.

Yong and her sister made up. They cried and baked cookies and left love notes on each other’s desks again.

She graduated. Jess tutored. They dated in quiet parks and busy cafes.

Twenty years later, she wrote him a poem and slipped it into his suit pocket on their wedding day.

“You didn’t ask me to fly. You didn’t ask me to change. You only waited. So I found my way back. To the boy who stayed.”

Years later still…

Their son, Jinwoo, stood at his window, moonlight in his eyes.

“I think I saw someone,” he told his crush, Taeri. “A boy with a shadow that didn’t match.”

“Should we go?” Taeri asked, trembling with wonder.

Jinwoo smiled gently. “My dad says reality’s better than dreams. And sometimes… I think he’s right.”

Behind them, Tinkerbell peeked through the curtains and giggled.

“You’re all so boring now,” she sighed, and vanished in a trail of gold.

But Yong saw her.

And smiled.

Because even the wildest dreamers must one day land.

But that doesn't mean the stars ever stop shining.

They just learn to glow in different ways.

To My Forever Girl, Yongsun (after “Of Stars and Other Promises”)

My dearest Yongsun,

There are nights when I still look out the window and wonder if Neverland is real. If stars remember us. If that wild summer of dreams and laughter and firefly wishes really happened. But then I see you—eyes still curious, smile still brighter than anything Peter ever offered—and I know that I don’t need to fly to believe in magic.

You’ve always been it. The magic.

You’re the girl who wanted to escape, and the woman who chose love. You’re the voice that calls me back when I get lost in my own storms, the warmth in the coffee cup you forget you’ve made for both of us, the softness in the way you forgive, even when I don’t deserve it.

And I know you’ll always crave the stars. You’ll always have mischief in your bones and wonder in your breath. But I will never try to pull you down. I will simply walk beside you—through every cloud, across every shore, past every doubt.

Even in dreams, I’m yours.

Even when we’re old and gray and our son’s chasing his own taeri across rooftops—I’ll still be the boy who chose you. The one who never left.

You are my first wish. My last dream. And every story I’ll ever tell.

I love you, Kim Yongsun. I love you, Solar. I love you, Yonggie. And I always will.

A Gasa Poem for My Queen of Stars

In dreams where faeries sleep and starlight kisses moonlight’s face, Your name is etched on every wind, across time’s soft, unhurried grace. The girl who danced with Never’s prince, now sleeps within my folded chest, And every breath I take for you is homeward bound, is truly blessed.

Each dawn you rise, I’ll catch the dreams you leave upon your pillow’s edge, I’ll ink them into poetry, a vow beneath the sky’s bright pledge. Your heart, once stitched with wanderlust, now beats beside my own so true, And still I say, my dearest star, I’ll always chase the world with you.

The stars may fade, the rivers bend, the tales of youth grow far and wide, But you will be my only song, my fire through every changing tide. No thimble kiss or pirate’s call could pull me from your golden light, For you, my love, I’ll write the skies, and dream for you each sacred night.

So let this vow in pixie dust outlast my soul, my breath, my ink: I’ll love you more than Neverland, more than the stars that dare to sink. Each time you wake, I’ll write your dreams, immortal as the morning dew— And as long as I draw breath, I���ll live to dream and love you.

[wheeinsgirlfriend]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

SOLAAAAAAR

SOLAR – TRAVEL

MYCON IN BALTIMORE (180523)

VIA @SHUTOFU ON YOUTUBE

[mamamooincorrectquotes]

Hwasa: you guys need to be more positive

Hwasa: *trips and falls down the stairs*

Hwasa: wow, I got down those stairs fast!

Byul:

Byul: are you..

Byul: are you doing okay

Hwasa,crying: N O

[artheadedmoo]

Kahlo-inspired Yongsun

[rockonlavender]

[yep9114]

Hellow #moonsun! You are on my feed today because I have forgotten what you guys look like together. 😭 Safe to say we miss you. 😖 #mamamoo #마마무 #solar #솔라 #kimyongsun #김용선 #moonbyul #문별 #moonbyulyi #문별이 #yongkongbyulkong https://www.instagram.com/p/CWI-v33BP53/?utm_medium=tumblr

[4colorsun]

But... you did this for what?! 👅

[i-say-fuck-4lot]

My first attempt at a Mamamoo drawing.

[theoldmc6106]

🌼🌼🌼 #Mamamoo #MAMAMOO #MooMoo #Moomoo #rbw #Solar #KimYongsun #Moonbyul #MoonByulyi #Wheein #JungWheein #Hwasa #AhnHyejin #fanstagram #kpop #kpoper #kpoplover #kpopfff #follow #like4like https://www.instagram.com/p/CR1ogrqjyOf/?utm_medium=tumblr

[misulstudios]

Have some Moonsun to shine bright on your day in these trying times!

Original date: 11Jun2020

[nagatotoru]

Moonbyul: Where... Are my clothes...?

*Solar on Happy Together*

Solar: Moonbyul copies my style.

[mamamooincorrectquotes]

Wheein: *gasps*

Solar: What is it?

Wheein: What if soy milk is just milk introducing itself in Spanish?

Solar: What the fuck?

Hwasa: Hold on, she's onto something

[artheadedmoo]

For Yongsun

[rockonlavender]

[denniezemclyon]

Hwasa - LMM

16.07.2020

I heard the piano and the violin then dropped my phone and tears started to flow. I cried and sobbed quietly cos I don't want them to hear. I badly needed this song. I've been shedding tears within these past few days everytime I let out deep words. But, those tears are out of frustration, anger, worries, shame, concern, regrets from arguments, grievances, memories, my current state and the tomorrow.

When I clicked the MV on YouTube I was excited to watch it as I'm anticipating Hyejin unnie's presence. I've heard the intro a couple of times with teasers but not the whole song. I heard rain and white noises but when the duet of the piano and violin striked followed by her voice that can move mountains, I lost it.

It resonates even though I don't understand the lyrics, it pounded in my core and coated my heart with a feeling I can't even begin to explain. I started to cry and up until I'm writing this while listening to the song, tears just won't stop. Tears that I've been so long holding back then desperately trying to let out for a while. Tears out of asking mercy, asking for help, asking for protection, asking for assurance, asking for hope.

Even there are some good things I have been doing like finishing a song after a long time, reviewing and dissecting music, volunteering, taking care of my mental health, even simply just by breathing, the condensed energy of me feeling off seems to be heavier.

That's why I have been suffering from extreme headaches lately. I didn't took any medicine for it cos I liked the pain. I liked it as much as it is miserably agonizing, I found pleasure in it.

Dark thoughts visit me. Thoughts that I don't want to explore. Thoughts I fight so hard, focusing my attention by holding on to funny videos, goin out or sitting in my room being me. Putting on my headphones and blasting loud songs to forget. Write unfinished songs and few poems as an outlet. Escape just for a while. Nevertheless, there are times it's hard to stay away and I feel angry about it and then guilty for thinking myself as weak.

I started to listen to MAMAMOO August last year and I can proudly say that it is one of the reason how I gained more confidence. Got into self-awareness, self-betterment and self-love.

I don't know how to let her know, or if anyone would see this for that matter but I wanna say that I'm genuinely, sincerely, truly grateful for the people who created this masterpiece and to Hwasa.

Even tho my vocabulary isn't that wide, there are countless more words I wish to express but I find myself running out of them to deeply convey how thankful I am to MAMAMOO. To people behind the curtains who also are collectively part as Mamamoo. To ever-loving MooMoos too! And ofc to each member as an artist, as a person and as an inspiration.

I hope Yong unnie, Byul unnie, Wheenie unnie and Hyegi unnie gets to do that as long as they can. As for me, I will work harder on myself and maybe one day. Oh no, not maybe..

One day, I will get to do that too. Make a difference. Give hope even just for a moment.

Take care. Stay safe. And be kind.

[4colorsun]

Wallpaper - Solar for Singles Magazine March 2021 Issue