#king joel

[froggiesir]

(she asked for extra pickles)

[10piecechickenmcnugget]

who’s stopping me from making him a tiny little moth

[mcytprideicons]

bisexual non-binary king joel of mezalea

requested by anon

[welcome-back-to-hoimycraf]

Lizzie thought it a bit strange to have her husband’s severed head tucked into the same furnace her food was prepared in. She thought it even more strange that his head could keep talking after being detached from his body. Admittedly, she was probably the weird one for sticking him in there in the first place- but she panicked, alright! It’s not every day that your dear spouse’s skull starts melting off their torso! Actually- she was getting ahead of herself. How did this all start again?

-------

The ocean was beautiful today. Well, it was beautiful everyday- but that wasn’t the point. The point was, Lizzie was ecstatic. Today was the day she’d finally teach Joel to swim. 

Somehow- despite living mere meters away from the water- he’d never learned how. When asked why, all she got was a shrug and a half-baked excuse about “not really getting along” with the sea. How could anyone not like the waters she called home! Well, today was the day that would change, she’d make sure of it.

Her giddiness only grew as she watched Joel’s small rowboat tread over, making his way ever so slowly to the lilypad she was rocking back and forth on. He was crawling along like a baby moving on their own for the first time, but it didn't matter. She’d help him face his fears. Even if by force. 

Eventually, the Mezelean couldn’t stall any longer and came to a stop at his wife’s feet, barely able to look up at her before being pounced on. The boat rocked dangerously as Lizzie squeezed the life out of him. He shrieked in a rather unmanly way. The Ocean Queen thought it was cute, at least.

“Oh, Joel, I’m so happy to see you!” She bounced up and down as the man stepped shakily out of his boat, looking like he’d just watched his whole family be murdered. Nothing a bit of sweet talk couldn’t fix.

“Yeah- well- you almost knocked me out my blummin’ boat!” Joel huffed and ran his hands down his face.

Lizzie just grinned cheekily and poked his shoulder. “You know you love me.”

He sighed again, looking away defeatedly. “...I do.”

That was what brought him here in the first place. His love for his beautiful, lovely wife trumped all fear and wariness he could muster; something that would probably lead to his downfall one day. But for now, that only led to her convincing him to face his fear of water. 

It was an irrational fear, he knew. Void, he’d only ever touched the stuff once in his twenty-six years of sentience. A small perk of being made of clay: you don’t have to bathe. 

Anyway, he was getting off-topic. The only time he’d ever been in the ocean was during an accident while at sea, ending with him being tossed in the drink. He had barely any memory between hitting the water and waking in the Palace infirmary- besides meeting Lizzie, of course.

Speaking of Lizzie, his wife was bent down to his height, staring at him with those (oddly predatory- like a shark cornering its prey) adorable eyes filled with curiosity. 

“Whatcha thinkin’ about?” She asked, head tilting to the side like a dog.

A fond smile spread across his face. He could never resist her puppy (guppy?) eyes, even if she annoyed the shit out of him sometimes. 

“Thinking about the day we met,” Joel cooed, putting on a sappy expression, leaning closer and topping it off with smooch-y lips for the full effect. 

Lizzie’s face twisted into a look of amused disappointment, pushing his face away. “Ugh- why’d I have to marry such a weirdo?”

He cackled. “Hey! I was telling the truth!”

The Ocean Queen’s expression morphed into something more fond. “Really?”

“Really.” Joel would never pass up a chance to tell his wife how much he loves her, and he won’t stop until he’s dead and gone.

“Well if that’s the case, you might be up for a swim!” And with that his feet were swiped out from under him, leaving Joel in a bridal carry in Lizzie’s arms. He gripped her around the neck in panic, a high-pitched yelp tearing out of his throat.

“What? Wait, Lizzie-!”

The splash that followed was sizable and absolutely soaked the axolotl. She mustn't have minded, seeing as he could vaguely hear her slightly-crazed laughter through the waves he’d created. It felt like he was floating and sinking at the same time, as if his body didn’t know whether to fold to his weight or let the air pockets where his organs would be lift him to the surface. 

After what felt like years, the sea finally decided to release him. He gasped as he surfaced even though he didn’t have lungs. A habit he’d picked up from other cultures, he guessed. After blinking the water from his eyes, he was met with his wife’s face centimeters from his. He screamed and fumbled backwards, forgetting he wasn’t on solid ground until he started sinking back into the depths. When he resurfaced Lizzie was crouched to the ground with her arms wrapped tightly around her middle, almost crying with laughter.

Joel spit out some seawater that had found its way inside his mouth as he climbed back onto the lilypad beside her, scowling. He wrung out his tunic, watching as the water poured out of it. “Yeah- you’re lucky I thought to wear less expensive clothes for this!”

His wife’s laughter slowly tapered off and she wiped a clawed finger under her eye. “But it was so funny! Plus, it got you used to the water!”

He huffed. “Used to it? You blummin’ threw me in!”

She put her hands to her hips as she stood up. “There’s no better way to teach a person something new than to throw them straight in!” She paused for a tick. “Literally,” she added. 

Joel shook his head and chuckled softly. How did he end up with such a strange woman? He looked back up to see her tying up her long hair, tongue poking out with concentration, and suddenly remembered why he married her. 

“Are you going to just sit there and admire my beauty, or are you gonna get in the water?”

The Mezalean was snapped out of his thoughts to see Lizzie already in the water. He cleared his throat, a flush creeping over his cheeks. “But you are gorgeous!” He grinned as he gingerly slid off the lilypad and watched as she giggled, flushed, her fins wiggling with giddiness.

“No buttering up the teacher!” She teased, splashing him lightly.

The lesson said “teacher” gave afterward was much less fun than how it began. Don’t get him wrong, Joel loved spending his day with his wife, pressed close to her (even if out of fear at times) and feeling her presence. But his… relationship with the water won in the end.

The first time things seemed wrong was when he slowly started to feel more and more lethargic. His arms felt too heavy to paddle and his legs were fighting to kick. Lizzie suggested they take a break, assuming he was just getting tired. It seemed to work after eating lunch on the lilypad, taking in the sun. But when they got back in the water, things got worse. Way worse.

They were in the middle of him learning to float. Joel had been on his back, Lizzie holding her hands under his back to guide him and make him feel safer. The two had been having a nice conversation about the new additions to Matral Palace’s horse head wall when Lizzie stopped talking suddenly. Joel looked over at her, taking in her confused and slightly worried expression. “Lizzie?” 

“Uh, Joel-” she paused like she didn’t know how to continue. “Are you prone to… melting?”

“What?” He went to sit up, forgetting he was floating, and sunk. He attempted to swim back up like how Lizzie had taught him, but only sunk deeper. He felt heavier than usual, which made panic flare up in his chest. He wasn’t worried about drowning, since he couldn’t. No, compared to his real fear, drowning was nothing. He was scared of sinking to the ocean floor, never to be seen again. As his arms unsuccessfully flailed in the water, he watched as, slowly, chunks of him started to slough off and float up to the surface. He guessed he knew what Lizzie was talking about now. 

He had almost come to terms with the idea of being swallowed by the ocean, but he soon realized that he was in the Ocean Empire and that his wife (and everyone else) knew how to swim. Lizzie was making her way down to him fast, a few of her guards not far behind. When she spotted the state Joel was in, she chattered a few words to them in Oceanic he couldn’t understand. The King watched as the guards started to collect pieces of him from the water. He was thankful they’d come off clean in big chunks, not wanting to lose small, microscopic pieces of himself. Lizzie ended up grabbing his head first- he hadn’t even realized it had separated from his torso. She said something that sounded close to her asking if he was ok. He started to nod before realizing he needed a torso to do that, so he settled for letting out a watery, “Yeah.”

The process of his rescue was a bit of a blur. He supposed it might’ve been the shock, or something like that. He wasn’t sure how, but the next thing he knew, he was back on the lilypad. Lizzie was leaning over him with an expression that was a bit too calm for just seeing her husband break apart. “Joel?”

“Is it bad?”

She glanced back down at where the rest of his body would be. He couldn’t be sure it even was, not that he could move his head to look. “Erm- I don’t know how to say this.”

He breathed out a dry laugh. “Tell me, doc, how much time do I have left?”

“Shut it.” She smiled thinly and flicked at his face, grimacing when the impact left a slight dent in his cheek. Lizzie cleared her throat quickly before continuing. “So, I may have forgotten that you’re made of clay and that clay doesn’t do so well in water…”

Joel hummed. “Yeah, I kinda forgot that too.”

His wife looked at him guilty as she gingerly picked his severed skull from the ground, pressing it to her chest. “Oh Joel- I’m sorry!” She whined, resting her cheek on the top of his head, smearing some of what would be his hair onto her face. 

The Mezalean just chuckled. “It’s fine, Liz. Just patch me back up and I’ll be good to go.”

She leaned back to show him her watery eyes. “Are you sure?”

“Positive.”

-------

Oh, right. She remembers now. 

“Lizzie? Are you even listening?”

Joel’s muffled voice snapped the Queen out of her thoughts. “Huh?”

“I asked if you were listening to me,” he repeated, fondly rolling his eyes.

She smiled. “Well, it’s a bit hard to hear you through the door. And the fire.”

“Fair.” He looked to the side for a second before returning back to her gaze. “How long do you think it’s gonna take to firm the rest of me up?”

Lizzie grimaced and looked out the kitchen’s window. “Erm, no idea.”

“Great,” he sighed. 

A beat of silence passed before either of them spoke again, Joel ending up breaking the awkward air. 

“You know you’ve just given me more of a reason to never swim again, right?”

The axolotl smirked at that. “Is that a challenge?”

He scoffed dramatically. “I just blummin’ fell apart and you want to put me back in the sea!”

She hummed in thought. “Maybe I should get you glazed.”

“LIZZIE.”

[empiressheadcanons]

King Joel would be proud of Sheriff Jimmy.

[fallenstellar]

Mezalean people are allowed to customize and change themselves after King Joel got bored and sick of just seeing his face all around him. It's quite patronizing and funny, yes, but as per his principles, he should break the homogeneity of his people just like what he did to the mesa.

He can't do it on his own because, even he doesn't admit it, he can't sculpt anything humanoid without it looking like him or having a resemblance to him. After all, with the lifeless mesa, the only "human" he knows and sees through his eyes is himself, in front of the mirror.

He allowed them to have their own names, their own personalities, and their identities. They could change how they look through some terracotta surgery performed by professionals that are assigned by the king himself and mentored through his life. After all, their terracotta bodies aren't that fragile and sensitive to changes. Although, there are still operations that are harder than others and aren't allowed in the kingdom because it harms oneself. Of course, danger isn't avoidable, even with their tough bodies.

Since Mezalean people are naturally genderless and birthed to this world without any assigned sex (they don't need to, they are created by their king through the Mother Tree's help), they adapt different gender identities. Neopronouns are very popular in Mezalea, and it's a common courtesy to ask someone's pronouns. Some of them assigned themselves to the two most common gender identities, being masculine and feminine, and others don't.

Even with that, they mostly have their own unique identities gender-wise. Feminine Mezaleans might prefer he/him pronouns even they identify themselves as the latter. It's rare for the Mezalean people to have one way or the other.

The king doesn't mind all of this, as long his people are happy, he's happy. Besides, this is what he envisioned before when he declared that freedom to them.

It's quite complicated for the other nations to understand this when they first discovered the lush land among the dry arid mesa. With further social studies and incremental amount of researchers boggling the king about how did this happen, some of the other nations' citizen followed how the gender construct of Mezalea has. Some of the researchers even managed to group up certain gender groups into a manageable label for them to understand an ounce of it.

The culture of Mezalea spread across the continent and became news to other nations. It's as colorful as the nation's banner and architecture. The king doesn't mind it, after all, for the very first day he created one of his subjects, he knew that he should give the freedom that the Mother Tree gave him to his people in the future.

[anonbeeishere]

I dont. Think it really hit me until now just how TALL empires s1 lizzie was

I heard 10 ft and was like oh thats big! And didnt think any more of it

But i was fucking around with a height comparison website and

Lizzie could pick joel up like a child

[amistyshadow]

Just a King and his Queen with their Axolotl babies.

Did this for background practice. Had a lot of fun with the water and the water reflections.

[thecoddaughter]

Empires Lizzie and Joel as I Will by Brandi Carlilie

*disclaimers: I am not inherently an great artist so this is very elementary and also traces some personal pictures. I’m genuinely proud of this one as I did a lot more free hand this time.

Concept explanation: I kind of see this song as a back and forth or dual perspective between Joel and Lizzie in season 2 in my headcanon universe where god Joel was made that way to fill in for Lizzie and Jimmy and Mayor Lizzie is yet another cursed goddess of the sea, but she doesn’t remember. While she doesn’t remember she feels as though Joel holds some sort of feeling be it resentment or love, however they are both living their own lives. But as all soulmate type deals, they feel like something is missing. Deep down in memories not there Lizzie is angry he didn’t find her, little does she know he’s been looking this whole time just in the wrong spots and when he did find her it was too late.

[trecho-rules]

Empires SMP Headcannon

After losing all of his mortal possessions, King Joel runs far far away from Mezalea and builds the famed Fountain of Strength out of grief, begging the heavens to lift his suffering. The heavens took pity after he jumped into the fountain, turning him into the tall, strong and sexy god we know at the cost of losing his memories of his mortal life.

[kingscourthouse]

Little comic of how Xisuma sees the new hermits

I may draw how he sees everyone someday. Maybe not. Who knows.

[k-wame]

Jaime Lorente as Néstor & Joel Bosqued as Álex 📺MANO DE HIERRO (IRON REIGN) · S1·EP5 · Crime/Thriller

[luigra]

The creationist myth

[pedrohub]

EMMY AWARDS LOSER PEDRO PASCAL

Outstanding Lead Actor In A Drama Series

[welcome-back-to-hoimycraf]

hello! this is my gift for @oakworthyt4t for the @mcytblrholidayexchange! i legit had so much fun writing this and talking to the beta reader lol. i hope you enjoy and have a wonderful winter ^_^

Lizzie thought it a bit strange to have her husband’s severed head tucked into the same furnace her food was prepared in. She thought it even more strange that his head could keep talking after being detached from his body. Admittedly, she was probably the weird one for sticking him in there in the first place- but she panicked, alright! It’s not every day that your dear spouse’s skull starts melting off their torso! Actually - she was getting ahead of herself. How did this all start again?

-------

The ocean was beautiful today. Well, it was beautiful everyday - but that wasn’t the point. The point was, Lizzie was ecstatic. Today was the day she’d finally teach Joel to swim. 

Somehow- despite living mere meters away from the water - he’d never learned how. When asked why, all she got was a shrug and a half-baked excuse about “not really getting along” with the sea. How could anyone not like the waters she called home! Well, today was the day that would change, she’d make sure of it.

Her giddiness only grew as she watched Joel’s small rowboat tread over, making his way ever so slowly to the lilypad she was rocking back and forth on. He was crawling along like a baby moving on their own for the first time, but it didn't matter. She’d help him face his fears. Even if by force. 

Eventually, the Mezelean couldn’t stall any longer and came to a stop at his wife’s feet, barely able to look up at her before being pounced on. The boat rocked dangerously as Lizzie squeezed the life out of him. He shrieked in a rather unmanly way. The Ocean Queen thought it was cute, at least.

“Oh, Joel, I’m so happy to see you!” She bounced up and down as the man stepped shakily out of his boat, looking like he’d just watched his whole family be murdered. Nothing a bit of sweet talk couldn’t fix.

“Yeah- well- you almost knocked me out my blummin’ boat!” Joel huffed and ran his hands down his face.

Lizzie just grinned cheekily and poked his shoulder. “You know you love me.”

He sighed again, looking away defeatedly. “...I do.”

That was what brought him here in the first place. His love for his beautiful, lovely wife trumped all fear and wariness he could muster; something that would probably lead to his downfall one day. But for now, that only led to her convincing him to face his fear of water. 

It was an irrational fear, he knew. Void, he’d only ever touched the stuff once in his twenty-six years of sentience. A small perk of being made of clay: you don’t have to bathe. 

Anyway, he was getting off-topic. The only time he’d ever been in the ocean was during an accident while at sea, ending with him being tossed in the drink. He had barely any memory between hitting the water and waking in the Palace infirmary- besides meeting Lizzie, of course.

Speaking of Lizzie, his wife was bent down to his height, staring at him with those (oddly predatory - like a shark cornering its prey) adorable eyes filled with curiosity. 

“Whatcha thinkin’ about?” She asked, head tilting to the side like a dog.

A fond smile spread across his face. He could never resist her puppy (guppy?) eyes, even if she annoyed the shit out of him sometimes. 

“Thinking about the day we met,” Joel cooed, putting on a sappy expression, leaning closer and topping it off with smooch-y lips for the full effect. 

Lizzie’s face twisted into a look of amused disappointment, pushing his face away. “Ugh- why’d I have to marry such a weirdo?”

He cackled. “Hey! I was telling the truth!”

The Ocean Queen’s expression morphed into something more fond. “Really?”

“Really.” Joel would never pass up a chance to tell his wife how much he loves her, and he won’t stop until he’s dead and gone.

“Well if that’s the case, you might be up for a swim!” And with that his feet were swiped out from under him, leaving Joel in a bridal carry in Lizzie’s arms. He gripped her around the neck in panic, a high-pitched yelp tearing out of his throat.

“What? Wait, Lizzie-!”

The splash that followed was sizable and absolutely soaked the axolotl. She mustn't have minded, seeing as he could vaguely hear her slightly-crazed laughter through the waves he’d created. It felt like he was floating and sinking at the same time, as if his body didn’t know whether to fold to his weight or let the air pockets where his organs would be lift him to the surface. 

After what felt like years, the sea finally decided to release him. He gasped as he surfaced even though he didn’t have lungs. A habit he’d picked up from other cultures, he guessed. After blinking the water from his eyes, he was met with his wife’s face centimeters from his. He screamed and fumbled backwards, forgetting he wasn’t on solid ground until he started sinking back into the depths. When he resurfaced Lizzie was crouched to the ground with her arms wrapped tightly around her middle, almost crying with laughter.

Joel spit out some seawater that had found its way inside his mouth as he climbed back onto the lilypad beside her, scowling. He wrung out his tunic, watching as the water poured out of it. “Yeah- you’re lucky I thought to wear less expensive clothes for this!”

His wife’s laughter slowly tapered off and she wiped a clawed finger under her eye. “But it was so funny! Plus, it got you used to the water!”

He huffed. “Used to it? You blummin’ threw me in!”

She put her hands to her hips as she stood up. “There’s no better way to teach a person something new than to throw them straight in!” She paused for a tick. “Literally,” she added. 

Joel shook his head and chuckled softly. How did he end up with such a strange woman? He looked back up to see her tying up her long hair, tongue poking out with concentration, and suddenly remembered why he married her. 

“Are you going to just sit there and admire my beauty, or are you gonna get in the water?”

The Mezalean was snapped out of his thoughts to see Lizzie already in the water. He cleared his throat, a flush creeping over his cheeks. “But you are gorgeous!” He grinned as he gingerly slid off the lilypad and watched as she giggled, flushed, her fins wiggling with giddiness.

“No buttering up the teacher!” She teased, splashing him lightly.

The lesson said “teacher” gave afterward was much less fun than how it began. Don’t get him wrong, Joel loved spending his day with his wife, pressed close to her (even if out of fear at times) and feeling her presence. But his… relationship with the water won in the end.

The first time things seemed wrong was when he slowly started to feel more and more lethargic. His arms felt too heavy to paddle and his legs were fighting to kick. Lizzie suggested they take a break, assuming he was just getting tired. It seemed to work after eating lunch on the lilypad, taking in the sun. But when they got back in the water, things got worse. Way worse.

They were in the middle of him learning to float. Joel had been on his back, Lizzie holding her hands under his back to guide him and make him feel safer. The two had been having a nice conversation about the new additions to Matral Palace’s horse head wall when Lizzie stopped talking suddenly. Joel looked over at her, taking in her confused and slightly worried expression. “Lizzie?” 

“Uh, Joel-” she paused like she didn’t know how to continue. “Are you prone to… melting?”

“What?” He went to sit up, forgetting he was floating, and sunk. He attempted to swim back up like how Lizzie had taught him, but only sunk deeper. He felt heavier than usual, which made panic flare up in his chest. He wasn’t worried about drowning, since he couldn’t. No, compared to his real fear, drowning was nothing. He was scared of sinking to the ocean floor, never to be seen again. As his arms unsuccessfully flailed in the water, he watched as, slowly, chunks of him started to slough off and float up to the surface. He guessed he knew what Lizzie was talking about now. 

He had almost come to terms with the idea of being swallowed by the ocean, but he soon realized that he was in the Ocean Empire and that his wife (and everyone else) knew how to swim. Lizzie was making her way down to him fast, a few of her guards not far behind. When she spotted the state Joel was in, she chattered a few words to them in Oceanic he couldn’t understand. The King watched as the guards started to collect pieces of him from the water. He was thankful they’d come off clean in big chunks, not wanting to lose small, microscopic pieces of himself. Lizzie ended up grabbing his head first- he hadn’t even realized it had separated from his torso. She said something that sounded close to her asking if he was ok. He started to nod before realizing he needed a torso to do that, so he settled for letting out a watery, “Yeah.”

The process of his rescue was a bit of a blur. He supposed it might’ve been the shock, or something like that. He wasn’t sure how, but the next thing he knew, he was back on the lilypad. Lizzie was leaning over him with an expression that was a bit too calm for just seeing her husband break apart. “Joel?”

“Is it bad?”

She glanced back down at where the rest of his body would be. He couldn’t be sure it even was, not that he could move his head to look. “Erm- I don’t know how to say this.”

He breathed out a dry laugh. “Tell me, doc, how much time do I have left?”

“Shut it.” She smiled thinly and flicked at his face, grimacing when the impact left a slight dent in his cheek. Lizzie cleared her throat quickly before continuing. “So, I may have forgotten that you’re made of clay and that clay doesn’t do so well in water…”

Joel hummed. “Yeah, I kinda forgot that too.”

His wife looked at him guilty as she gingerly picked his severed skull from the ground, pressing it to her chest. “Oh Joel- I’m sorry!” She whined, resting her cheek on the top of his head, smearing some of what would be his hair onto her face. 

The Mezalean just chuckled. “It’s fine, Liz. Just patch me back up and I’ll be good to go.”

She leaned back to show him her watery eyes. “Are you sure?”

“Positive.”

-------

Oh, right. She remembers now. 

“Lizzie? Are you even listening?”

Joel’s muffled voice snapped the Queen out of her thoughts. “Huh?”

“I asked if you were listening to me,” he repeated, fondly rolling his eyes.

She smiled. “Well, it’s a bit hard to hear you through the door. And the fire.”

“Fair.” He looked to the side for a second before returning back to her gaze. “How long do you think it’s gonna take to firm the rest of me up?”

Lizzie grimaced and looked out the kitchen’s window. “Erm, no idea.”

“Great,” he sighed. 

A beat of silence passed before either of them spoke again, Joel ending up breaking the awkward air. 

“You know you’ve just given me more of a reason to never swim again, right?”

The axolotl smirked at that. “Is that a challenge?”

He scoffed dramatically. “I just blummin’ fell apart and you want to put me back in the sea!”

She hummed in thought. “Maybe I should get you glazed.”

“LIZZIE.”

[empiressheadcanons]

S1 Joel is made of clay! But he also thinks that everyone else is also made of clay so he's always super confused

he believes that Lizzie’s and Jimmy’s gills are aesthetic because why would clay need to breathe?