#lefou i’m afraid i’ve been thinking—

[fractallogic]

Now that I’ve done the dumb fucking thing and decided I want the job, I’ve convinced myself that they’re gonna just turn me down, in part because I DIDN’T EVEN APPLY FOR IT!!! THEYRE JUST GIVING ME THE INTERVIEW BECAUSE I ASKED ABOUT A DIFFERENT JOB AND DID AN INFO INTERVIEW AND MY ACQUAINTANCE WAS LIKE “actually there’s this other job we’re looking to fill ASAP that does an entry-level mix of all of these different roles, and you’d be a great fit if you’re interested; oh, you’re interested how does $70K to start sound and oh I’m sorry these entry positions are paid so abysmally” AND IT DID SOUND INTERESTING AND $70K IS WITHIN THE RANGE OF WHAT ID EXPECT FOR AN ENTRY LEVEL POSITION SO I SAID THAT WOULD BE GREAT AND NOW IM TALKING TO THE PERSON I DONT KNOW AND IT SEEMS LIKE AN INTERVIEW AND MY BUDDY SAYS ITS AN INTERVIEW

Fucking all this because I’m doing the correct thing and researching the company before the interview and I was like oh shit actually this is super interesting I wonder how they do XYZ and whether they’ve gotten any feedback on ABC and what kind of data does PQ give them, etc etc etc., oh wow I would love to have this job and learn about all of the buckets within this “pillar” of the company

Suddenly I’m sleepy and instead of being all “fuck yes this is how networking is supposed to work”, I’m “ah fuck I’m gonna blow it” and spiraling so hard that Artemis has had to come sit and purr on me twice in the last 45 min

I hope their employee insurance is good and will cover some really excellent therapy for me because oh my fucking god this is stupid

[pubbybutch]

Technically a ham and cheese lunchable is a form of charcuterie board

[ettiqu-rtz]

the sun and the star thoughts

alright lefou i’m afraid i’ve been thinking. this may be a bit incoherent and rambly, please bear with me lol.

i enjoyed tsats for all the reasons i’ve seen people criticizing it. i think the characterization was excellent- every time nico made a cringe “edgy” joke i was thrilled because my son is healing. will’s arc and journey pleasantly surprised me too. i was worried he was going to be neglected as a character in his own right in favor of advancing nico’s narrative, but that wasn’t the case. their stories bounced off of each other and intertwined very well.

i think the themes of accepting change and fluidity, and not putting yourself in a box because it’s what expected of you were done beautifully. i would have included the whole “finding yourself in each other” aspect if it wasn’t for the eggs and toast joke at the end. that completely negated the whole thing for me. small and petty, i know, but i could not shake the cringe.

what disappointed me the most was the pacing. i swear to god it felt like 2/3 of the book was just them hanging out with those stupid trogs. idk it wasn’t enough to put me off of the whole book, but definitely noticeable. i also didn’t like that will enjoys golden oreos. your fave is problematic folks.

but yeah maybe i’ll try to write a more cohesive review one day. those are just my overall thoughts about it.

[droppingdonkeys]

Lefou I’m afraid I’ve been thinking

(after creating a swarm of kids for memes)

So my crack headcanon from a year ago states Luisa getting pregnant with twins, and pregnancy is weird because she gets properly tired for the first time in her life, and labor/birth is not a walk in the park but it’s pretty quick for a first birth. It’s okay, Luisa’s strong enough for two babies and herself!

But then, she has triplets, like Abuela Alma. (Who had a much tinier frame and did just fine) But oh man, this pregnancy makes her rethink everything. Cramps, aches, moodswings, it’s turned up to 100 and she’s either cranky or sleepy. REALLY sleepy. I mean, she’s still strong, but this growing 3 babies is taking it’s toll on Luisa. She does it with love, but can’t wait for it to be over.

Then labor starts. It takes long, but once the first baby is out, the rest follow too, with relative ease. She’ll smile and coo, and then pass out from blood loss.

With Julieta’s food, midwives and the town’s doctor around you would say there’s nothing to worry about, but it’s still birthing triplets in a very old fashioned, isolated village. Giving birth isn’t a death sentence in the Encanto but it’s still complicated. Luisa hemmorhages but a blood transfusion saves the day.

In the end Luisa’s fine, but there’s a solid age gap between the triplets and any other children she might have after them.

[ilbella]

i’m not saying i want my psd to imply ro has albinism but [waves hand noncommittally]

[homeofthewildhag]

[magicalthoughtsblog]

“LeFou, I’m afraid I’ve been thinking...”

[pluviophile-bookworm]

HSMTMTS 2x8: the one I’ve been waiting for

Last week watching the new HSMTMTS was the last thing I did before going to bed (and let me tell you, I almost couldn’t sleep that night), but now I’m starting my day with it. I’m having trouble breathing just thinking about everything that could possibly lie ahead. I don’t think I’m ready, but I also can’t wait a second longer. So let’s dive right in!

Ahhh we got Big Red doing the recap! We’re off to a strong start, I see.

Ok, so I don’t know which is funnier (objectively): Reddy calling Antoine ‘Napoleon’ or the ‘zat man looks ridiculous’ line delivery -- I mean, I do not condone Antoine’s behaviour when he said that line, but ABF makes impertinence sound funny. Still, ‘Napoleon over here’ is my new favourite thing to call Antoine.

I am absolutely loving Miss Jenn in this scene (’when they go low, we sing high’, anyone), but why’s she threatening my Sebby? She has no right.

Ahhhhhhhh we’re getting the Gaston scene! I mean, of course I knew that, but I still don’t think I’m ready for the sheer awesomeness...

Ok, things are awkward between Ashlyn and her Biggie (see, I noticed she calls him that and that’s why I chose to call him Reddy instead)... hope they’ll be fine though. I know what they have is stronger than some so-called French bloke trying to come between them.

I... forgive me, I need to take 5... the Gaston number is a thousand times better with the choreography! Big Red performing his heart out, EJ making Gaston look effortless just like he did in the audition, juggling those eggs, and then the dancers... glorious, indeed.

‘Keep our heads down and our chins up’ ... and Seb trying to physically do it... adorable! But why is Miss Jenn being so harsh to him today? I don’t like that.

Ok, so I’m happy for Nini (or is it NIna?) and I’m happy for Olivia, but I just don’t seem to be able to get invested in her, either in the show or in real life. I don’t know why, but that’s just how I feel. To each their own, I always say.

EJ making the Career Day announcement in the middle of Ricky and Nini’s conversation is just... a choice. An interesting choice on the part of whoever wrote it.

Yikes, Ricky! What is it with guys and violating Nini’s phone’s privacy?

Ok, so I was an advocate for ‘EJ and Gina emphatically as friends’, but I think I’m sold on them romantically. It’s kind of hard for me here -- as an aro, I’m uncomfortable with the ‘everything evolves into romance and revolves around romance’ approach, but as an unapologetic shipper, I think this episode is going to shatter my heart and then heal it and then shatter it again.

‘How many of you are familiar with the phrase “Seize the day”?’ Um, yeah, I love Newsies! You know, for someone who has never seen it and has only heard a couple of songs from it... where was I?

Ooh, we’re getting Jennzara content! After all that ‘Zacky Roy’ action, I’m ready for this.

And here, Carlos struggling to make the part of Chip sound good just goes to prove that this part is too small for Sebby! You don’t just go from Sharpay to Chip like that. I mean, I kind of see it... Seb’s got a Chip-worthy smile; but at the end of the day, Chip hasn’t got a Seb-worthy song, nay, showstopping number.

I won’t lie, seeing Big Red give Ricky the treatment he’s been getting from him was low-key (high-key) satisfying. But I can’t even tell you why I’m suddenly starting to empathise with Ricky here. Still, Reddy is right - Ricky’s been here before. Or if I might quote Carlos here, ‘Is this Mamma Mia 2, cos here we go again!’

You know, Ashlyn is right. Ignore the test. Career tests are bull. I can’t even begin to tell you how many times I’ve got the most ridiculous results on these things... though I guess ‘mediator’ isn’t so far removed from ‘translator’, which is my dream job that I’m working towards. I guess career tests are like horoscopes and prophecies -- they’re not meant to be taken literally, but require reading between the lines.

‘I live to serve’ Oh Reddy, don’t be like that! I mean, I know working in the service industry is one thing and being a doormat is another, but right now it just kind of seems like he’s equating them in his mind and putting himself down because of it, and he’s being outwardly cheerful for the benefit of others. Maybe it’s not just Ricky who needs therapy, and Reddy definitely needs a LeFou of his own, to cheer him up and lift his spirits, and remind him how brilliant he is.

You know, I think both Kourtney and Howie make some valid points here... but I’m afraid I’m with Kourtney on this one. It’s difficult to trust someone if you find out there’s a whole side of them you didn’t know.

Gosh, I’m so done with Rini. Even Carlos has an inside voice compared to what these two are demonstrating right now. How ‘main character syndrome’ of them is it to make a scene in the middle of the Slices?

Ohhhhh, Paris... gosh, why does everyone keep saying the wrong things with the best intentions in this episode? It’s frustrating.

Awwww, I can’t with these two! ‘The only other thing that makes me happy is you.’ But then he’s like ‘maybe it’s not enough’, and I just got a flashback of how he once told her ‘you are enough’... so I say, so are you, Reddy! You are enough, and Ash is just trying to do the best for you, but she’s kind of missing the point... but you are enough. And she knows it.

Awwww! S1 Mr Mazzara would never have. But I love this new version of him.

Ohh, the Duke talk! Ok, I don’t know how to feel about these two. I just want them to be close, always.

Is it just me, or does Sofia’s acting in this scene give off Cyrus’ coming out scene vibes?

And here we go again with the flashbacks. Nini and Ricky in the treehouse remind me how I felt during the ‘I love you’ scene last season... except this one is not the start of something new (as on-the-nose as that sounds), it’s the end of something old. It’s heartbreaking, but I think it’s necessary. And I think they both know it. If it’s meant to be, they’ll find their way back to each other -- when they’re both more mature. They need to grow separately for the time being.

Oh my, oh my! It’s the ‘If I Can’t Love Her’ scene, and it hits even harder than it might have, because this is actually the first time I’m ever hearing this song. Fan of BATB as I am, I am just not familiar with the stage version of it and so there are some songs I just have never heard. But they hit hard. 

Aww, Ashlyn with the Slices shirt! And EJ declining Duke after that was the only future he could see for himself... And Big Red being the absolute best, most supportive friend always and forever, whatever is going on in his own life... if I had a friend like him, I’d never let them go. And I’d never let them forget how amazing they are.

Ok, but I’m crying... I have been since the song started, and I think I will be for a long time after it’s ended... this episode really did break my heart. But it healed it, too. How weird is that? This was a ride. Enough to last me the week, I hope.

[lifewouldbebetteronmars]

Gaston: LeFou, I’m afraid I’ve been thinking

LeFou: A dangerous pasttime

Gaston: I know

Me, posting this to Tumblr: Clearly, with your combined lack of braincells

[poc-movie-supremacy]

Lefou I’m afraid I’ve been thinking -Gaston

Me too buddy me too

[incorrect-pokespe-quotes]

I had some time to think (a bad idea in the first place) and I kinda realized that pearl and dia have a pretty shocking correlation with timon and pumba

“LeFou I’m afraid I’ve been thinking!”

“A dangerous pastime”

“I know...”

Anyway i AGREE COMPLETELY they’re a super similar duo right down to Pearl / Timon often talking over their friend and acting as the smart one / leader when admittedly it’s prolly the other way around

That being said.... Lion King AU? I’m thinking Ruby and Sapphire as Simba and Nala (Ruby gets the scar from the stampede somehow?), Norman as Mufasa obviously (tho admittedly Norman doesn’t deserve it he’s an asshole), Pearl and Diamond as Timon and Pumba like you said, maybe Green as Zazu and Maxie as Scar?? And then hyenas can either be the Magma admins or— if we’re trying to keep it mostly dexhodlers— Johto Trio? Lmk what y’all think

[knightfailed-archived]

sorry but  “Lefou, I'm afraid I've been thinking.”  “A dangerous pastime.”  “I know”   is hands down the funniest interaction in any disney movie ever. the fact. that he. fully and /knowingly/ goes I KNOW has me in stitches every time.

[rreader]

Love all ur gaston work! Please do a fic where the Reader is at a bar with Gaston & Lefou? When the boys go to bar the Reader talks to a girl Lefou had brought over & accidentally lets slip she loves Gaston & plans to tell him when they get home but the girl is v. bitchy & says he probably doesn’t love her back. The reader decides to not say anything & becomes upset & stops looking after herself. When Gaston confronts her she accidentally says what happened & it ends fluffy. Thanks! Hope it’s ok

Pairing: Gaston x ReaderFandom: Disney ; BatB (2017)Warnings: angst (depression)

A/N: hey there darling! thank you so much for the compliment! I have to apologize for taking so long to finish this, but I hope it’s what you wanted

                                                         *****

“Here’s toyou, LeFou! May you have many more years ahead of you!” you smiledand kissed his cheek, Gaston only raised his jug, but LeFou stillsmiled like a giddy child.

“Thankyou two for being here with me. My two best friends in the world!”

Youlaughed a little and looked up when another woman approached thetable you were sitting at.

“Oh!This is Amelie, a childhood friend of mine.”

Youwanted to greet her, but it seemed as if she was more interested inGaston than anyone else.

Sincethis night was about LeFou – and Gaston really didn’t want to flirtwith another woman while you were sitting at the same table – he decidedto take the man to the bar and get new drinks, leaving you and Ameliebehind.

Shesat down across from you and watched them.

“Quitethe handsome one, isn’t he?”

“Indeed.No wonder one would fall in love with him,” to be honest, youdidn’t even realize the words were coming out of your mouth until itwas too late. Until Amelie had turned her head again, a wicked grin on her face.

“My,my..”

Youblushed a little and suddenly found the inside of your mug very interesting.

“I..might tell him tonight. I’ve been meaning to do so for a while now.”

WhenAmelie didn’t reply, you looked up again and as soon as you did, shestarted laughing, as if you had just told her the funniest joke shehad ever heard in her life.

“So,you want to tell Gaston you are in love with him, hm? And what exactly doyou think is going to happen when you do?” youwere about to reply, but she didn’t give you the chance. She justkept talking, “Imean, I’m not trying to upset you, sweetheart, but Gaston needs awoman,” she leaned back in her chair like she was talking aboutherself. Like she was the woman she was referring to,“..and I’m afraid you’re not histype. So you should probably just keep it to yourself.. so you don’tget hurt, of course. I’m just trying to look out for you.”

She put her hands over hers and faked a kind smile.

Thewords rang in your ear like a gunshot.

Was she right? You were not like any of his previous.. mates. And hadhe ever given you any indication that he had feelings for you, too?

The more you thought about it, the more you realized that she was probably right.

You could never compete with the other women that were pining for him.

All you’d ever be was his good friend, nothing more.

BeforeGaston could get back to the table, you got up and cleared yourthroat, excusing yourself, then pretty much fleeing from the tavernand running home, leaving a confused Gaston and LeFou behind.

You’dapologize to LeFou the next day, but right now, you needed to bealone, so no one would see you cry your eyes out.

Whata foolish girl you were, to have believed that Gaston might feel the same way. 

How could he?

                                                            ***

“(Y/N),what are you doing in here?” your sister entered the attic, herskirts dirty from the work in the fields. Work, you should’ve helpedwith. “Mother has been looking all over for you,” she put herhands on her waist and approached you.

Butyou didn’t hear her. Your eyes were set on the streets below,watching people walk by, hand in hand with their partners, theirchildren.. their loved ones.

“(Y/N)!”your sister snapped her fingers in front of your face, making surethat your mind didn’t wander off any further. “What’s wrong withyou lately?”

“Nothing..,”you whispered and slowly got up.

“Good.Then let’s go. We’ve got a long day ahead of us,” she walked outthe door again, not paying your phyiscal state any attention.

Youclosed your eyes for a second and took a deep breath.

Yourlegs felt shaky, your vision blurry and you felt the effects of nothaving eaten anything properly in quite some time and not having beenable to get a good night’s rest.

Butyou just couldn’t bring yourself to do either of these things.

Everytime you wanted to eat, your body rebelled against it.

Everytime you wanted to sleep, you saw him in front of your eyes,preventing you from drifting off.

Youwere trying your hardest to stay upright when you got out of thehouse. So much, that you didn’t even see the man that plagued your dreamsstanding right in front of your door.

“(Y/N)!Where have you been?”

“Home,”you tried to walk past him, but he quickly took a step back andblocked your path. “I need to work.”

“Idon’t think you’re in any position to work,” he gently grabbed your chinand made you look up at him, “You look sick.”

“Sincewhen do you care?”

Gaston’sbrows drew together in confusion.

“Sincewhen do I care? Have we not been friends for years? Is this not areason to care?”

Gaston had only ever cared about himself. Then he had met you and relaized that there is more in this world than just himself.

“Idon’t know.. Amelie seemed to think so. That you don’t care andprobably never will,” you made it sound like everything she had said were facts.

Gastonhad to think for a couple of seconds, before he even remembered who“Amelie” was.

“Thatfriend of LeFous’? What does she have to do with this?”

Youwere tired and you just wanted this day to be over, so you shoved hishand away and tried to walk around him, but he grabbed your upperarm.

“(Y/N)!”

“No,Gaston! I don’t think you and I should be friends anymore. So.. leaveme be.”

“Whathas gotten into you all of a sudden? Since when do you care aboutwenches like Amelie?”

“SinceI realized that she had a point,” you finally managed to get freeof his grip and walked down the stairs, but your legs gave inimmediately.

Hewas there to catch you before you could fall down and held you as tightly as possible in his arms.

“Whatdid she tell you, love?” 

Youthought about protesting at first, but then decided against it andjust.. gave in. You leaned against his chest, closing your eyes andbreathing in the smell of the leather he was wearing.

“ThatI’m not worthy of you.”

Gastoncould feel the anger boiling in him.

Howdare someone like that whore say something like that to you. To oneof his closest and truest friends. To the one woman that always stoodby his side and to the one woman that he truly cared about. The one that mattered.

Heslowly sat down onto the top of the stairs, pulling you down to sitwith him.

“Ifthere is anyone that is not worthy of someone, it’s me of you,(Y/N).”

Youlooked up at him, his hand cupping your cheek, then his foreheadleaned against your own and you closed your eyes. 

Suddenly, it felt like youwere finally able to breathe again.

Likea part of you had been missing these past days and now you had foundit again.

You still didn’t know if he really cared about you like you cared about him, but you knew one thing for sure. You did not want to lose him. You couldn’t. He was such a big part of your life and you didn’t want to live it without him in it. 

So whether you’d be friends or something more..

Only time would tell.

But for now, you were content being in his arms.

[president-coriolanus-snow]

Lefou I’m afraid I’ve been thinking.

[aimforliver]

                     “LeFou, I’m AFRAID I’ve been thinking.” @mywhataguy  //  canon dialogue sc !!

[ginnyweatherby]

No Matter What (Part 6)

Last chapter!  This one hurt me to write, but I hope the ending makes up for it.

Warnings for the ultimate angst ahead

(Chapters 1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

November 3rd

Gaston was pacing in the waiting room, his strides opposite of Lefou’s.  The doctors had whisked Charlotte away for surgery some time ago, and Gaston had never felt more scared.  Charlotte was so tiny, he couldn’t believe it. He’d gotten to hold her, and didn’t even feel silly talking to someone who couldn’t possibly understand.  She wasn’t his kid, but he loved her instantly.

Lefou was bouncing off the walls with anxiety.  He would pace for awhile, sit in one of the chairs for a few minutes, walk back to the room where Madeline was still staying with her parents, and end up back to his pacing in the waiting room.

“How long is this supposed to take?” Gaston asked.

“I have no idea,”  Lefou admitted, “but I hope it’s over soon, I can’t take much more of this,”

The surgery was successful, for the most part.  Gaston interpreted that to mean that they were just able to perform it without the worst happening.  The surgeon admitted that it probably wouldn’t help, but they’d done the best they could, before rattling off the medications the poor baby would be on for the rest of her life.

Lefou was finally allowed to see his daughter, and helped steer Madeline (who was still confined to a wheelchair) to see her.  Gaston stayed behind, feeling rather useless.

November 4th,

Gaston smiled as Lefou allowed him to step through the entrance to his apartment, a tiny purple bundle resting against his shoulder.  They had been allowed to go home, and were told just to love Charlotte the best they could in their short time together.  It was better for everyone to spend time at home, instead of in a cold hospital room.

“We weren’t expecting you until later,”  Lefou said, as Gaston offered to take the baby from him.

“You should always expect me,” Gaston said, “I’ve been told I have no concept of personal boundaries,”

“Oh, I’m aware,”  Lefou said, gently passing the sleeping Charlotte into Gaston’s arms, “I was the one who said it,”

They walked fully into the living room, settling on the couch.  Gaston adjusted the baby so he could see her face, and his smile widened as she let out the cutest yawn he had ever seen.

“I can’t get over how much she looks like you,”  Gaston observed.  Between her round cheeks, dark eyes, and a mop of curly hair, Charlotte was practically Lefou in a smaller body, although she had Madeline’s nose and chin.  Gaston had never given babies much more than a second glance, but even he could tell she was beautiful.

“It’s a little unfair, really,” Madeline chimed in, walking into the living room, shaking a bottle, “she gets his hair and eyes, and then the poor thing is left with my chin,”

“Oh, it’s not so bad,”  Lefou pried baby from Gaston’s arms, cooing quietly as she slowly woke up, blinking her big eyes, “she needs a chin, after all,”  he tapped Charlotte’s chin with his index finger, before taking the bottle from Madeline’s hands.

“If it wasn’t for the chin, you wouldn’t know she was related to you, Maddie,”  Gaston said with a laugh.

“Oh, believe me, I know she’s mine,”  Madeline said, falling onto the couch next to him, “she’s seven and a half pounds of me,”

Charlotte coughed and began to fuss around the bottle, but quieted down when Lefou adjusted it and spoke softly to her.

Gaston couldn’t help but wonder what ever made Lefou doubt he’d be a good father... he was a natural.

November 9th

It was Charlotte’s one-week birthday, and since they didn’t know how many birthdays she’d be able to have, Lefou informed Gaston they were going to celebrate.  So Gaston found himself at Lefou’s apartment (as he often did on his free afternoons), but this time he had a little present in his hand, and was even wearing a buttoned shirt.

He raised his hand to knock, but the door swung open of it’s own volition.

Gaston’s hand flew to his chest to try and still his racing heart, “Geez, you scared me!  Are you watching through the peephole?”

“That’s exactly what I’m doing,” Lefou answered, allowing Gaston to step through, “Charlotte was awake all night, and she’s finally resting, I don’t want anyone’s knocking to wake her up yet,”

“Is she going to sleep through the entire party?”  Gaston asked, placing his present on the table.  It wasn’t much, but he’d found that “If you think I’m cute, you should see my uncle!” onesie in the back of his closet, and he couldn’t wait to give it to her.

“No, that’s why we’re letting her sleep now,”  Lefou explained, peering out the peephole, before throwing the door open again, allowing his parents and sister to come through.

“What’s he doing?”  Jacqueline mouthed to Gaston, as she watched Lefou look intently out the door.

“The baby’s sleeping,”  Gaston mouthed back with a shrug.

Jacqueline seemed to take that as an acceptable answer, before walking away.

Not long after, Madeline appeared from her bedroom with Charlotte in her arms.  The baby was bleary-eyed but was being quiet for the time being.

Jacqueline slid in her socks across the room in order to see her niece closer.

“Be careful, she’s still tired,” Madeline warned, as she gently moved Charlotte into Jacqueline’s arms.

Gaston knew it was strange to have full-blown party for someone who was only a week old, but when he looked around to Lefou and Madeline’s friends and family, the presents piling on the table, and even the cake Madeline’s mother had made, he knew it was the right decision.  Madeline deserved this. Lefou deserved this.  Charlotte deserved this.

November 17th

Gaston spent most of his days with Lefou, if only for a little while, while still giving him and Madeline time to bond with the baby.  Lefou was often seen with a camera, and seemed to be snapping as many pictures as possible. Gaston urged him not to develop the picture of him on a particularly bad hair day, but Lefou said he looked charming with Charlotte sleeping against his shoulder, holding onto the ends of his hair.

Charlotte was getting bigger, and sometimes Gaston forgot what could possibly happen.  He’d actually wandered into the library (Belle asked if he was lost) to do some reading up on heart conditions.  He didn’t know exactly what it was Charlotte had, but he hoped more than anything that maybe she would end up like one of the best-case scenarios.

“Don’t hurt yourself reading that,”  Lefou said, when he caught Gaston with one of the books in his lap.  It was a weekend, and Lefou had brought Charlotte to visit Gaston, while Madeline took a much-needed nap at home.

“Believe it or not, I do know how to read,”  Gaston huffed, as he watched his friend gently bounce Charlotte to soothe her.

“No, I mean,”  Lefou sighed, “I’ve read some of that stuff too, and... it doesn’t do you much good. It just scares and disappoints you,”

“What do you mean?”  Gaston asked, setting the book next to him.  He’d never been good at reading for extended periods of time.

Lefou laid Charlotte on Gaston’s bed, while keeping a hand on her belly to make sure she didn’t roll off.  “Charlotte’s... condition... is serious.  They don’t know why it happened but... the ones you’re probably reading about, are more easily treated,”

“I’m just trying to see if there’s a way she could...”

Lefou looked down to the baby, before softly tickling her sides.  “She doesn’t understand, and in all honesty, neither do we.  We’re trying to have the best time together we can, and we’re giving her the medicine to make sure she stays comfortable but... it’s all just a matter of time,”

“But it’s not fair,”  Gaston wasn’t usually openly emotional, but as he looked at that innocent little baby, he felt himself get a little choked up.

“I know,”  Lefou whispered, “it isn’t fair at all... but we’ll always be here for you, right, sweetie?”  he said the last part in a higher pitch, smiling down at his daughter.

Gaston willed the tears hovering behind his eyes not to fall as he reached over to tickle his “niece” as well.

November 23rd

Gaston wandered down the halls that seemed all too familiar.  He shouldn’t have to be walking them again so soon.

There shouldn’t have to be a such thing as a pediatric ward.  Not for such serious illnesses.  Babies didn’t deserve to stay in such a cold, sterile environment.  They didn’t understand why they were stuck under such bright lights, or why they had strange cords and wires attached to them.  The thought of it made Gaston want to cry.  Or vomit.  Or just run away.

But he had told Lefou early on that he would be there for him.  No matter what.  He supposed this fell under the “no matter what” category.

“How’s she doing?”  Gaston asked, almost afraid to peer into the bassinet.  He knew he wasn’t going to like what he saw.

“She’s... she’s okay,”  Lefou said, scratching the back of his head.  He wasn’t crying, but Gaston could tell he had been.

Gaston nodded.  He cautiously looked over to the little crib that held Charlotte, while Madeline peered over the side, murmuring to her.

“They’re monitoring her,”  Lefou explained, nodding his head towards the screens and wires in the room, “they said she’s doing... well.  I mean, all considering,”

“Maybe she’ll get to come home soon,”  Gaston said, hopefully.

“... I don’t think so,”  Lefou said, the words catching in his throat.

November 25th

This had to be the worst day of Gaston’s life.  He couldn’t eat, or think.  He could hardly breathe.

He was sleeping when he got the call. He didn’t want to answer it.  A part of him already knew.  It was over.

The conversation was short.  Lefou could hardly speak, but he didn’t really need to.  Gaston understood.  He didn’t really know what to say, either.

He didn’t visit Lefou that day.  He figured his and Madeline’s families would be visiting, and decided to give them their space.  He sent Lefou a message telling him that he’d be there if he needed anything.

Truth be told, he needed time to himself today, too.

December

The following month was harder than Gaston could have imagined.  Madeline had moved back with her family, Lefou hardly ever left the apartment.  His mother or sister would occasionally bring him some leftovers from their meal, but they were struggling as well.

Despite his own grieving, Gaston had to take it into his own hands to make sure Lefou took care of himself, at least enough to get by.

Gaston still managed to make most of his classes, but every afternoon he found himself at Lefou’s home. Most days, Lefou was sitting on the couch, unshaven, still in pajamas, and staring without really seeing at the television.

Gaston would scrounge through the little kitchenette to find something to reheat, or a bowl of cereal, or even just a piece of toast.  Anything to get Lefou to eat something.

Gaston would sit next to Lefou as he picked at whatever food Gaston gave him, and they would silently watch TV together.

The holidays were approaching, and while Lefou was jolly most times of the year, Gaston had never seen him less festive.

“Are you going to celebrate Hanukkah with your family this year?”  Gaston asked.

Lefou shrugged.

“You could come to my place for Christmas,”  Gaston suggested, “I know how you like the lights...”

“It’s not the same,”  Lefou said, his voice hoarse from disuse.

“Well, no,”  Gaston said, “I mean, Christmas is only one day, and Hanukkah is eight but-”

“No, I mean,”  Lefou sighed.  Just speaking seemed to take great effort.  “We had it all planned out. She was going to celebrate Christmas with Madeline’s family, and we would celebrate Hanukkah with mine.  I even had a few presents hidden away already,”

Gaston wasn’t used to being at a loss for words.

“We were so excited to celebrate the holidays with a little baby around,”  Lefou said, “now I can hardly hear a Christmas carol on TV without wanting to cry,”

“I know it’s hard, Lefou,”

“No you don’t,”  Lefou snapped.

Gaston blinked, unused to Lefou lashing out at him.  “You’re right, I don’t... and I hopefully never will.  But I loved her, too,”

Lefou huffed, setting his plate on the coffee table in front of them.  He’d eaten, but hardly.

“Even though she was only a baby, she wouldn’t want you to sit around like this,”  Gaston didn’t know what it was babies wanted, but it sounded convincing. “She knew you to always be bouncing around, singing to her, playing with her, tickling her.  She wouldn’t recognize you like this. This isn’t you,”

Lefou didn’t say anything, which was at least an improvement over his shouting.

“She definitely wouldn’t recognize you with that beard you’ve got going,”  Gaston said, daring to smile, just slightly.

Lefou ran his hand across his chin and winced.  “I just don’t have the energy to shave,”

“That’s fine,”  Gaston said, “it’s winter, anyway.  The point is... you’re allowed to be sad.  To grieve.  You’re allowed to miss her, we all do!  But you can’t keep living like this.  Beating yourself up over something beyond your control,”

Lefou sighed, sitting up a little, “I know you’re right, but I really hate it,”

Gaston gave him one of his signature cocky grins, “Really?  Because I love when I’m right,”

“I should call Madeline,”  Lefou said.  “Excuse me,”  he stood from the couch (the first time Gaston had seen him move in days), and walked into the bedroom, presumably to make his call.

Once he was out of sight, Gaston fell against the back of the couch with a sigh.

When he heard Lefou’s voice drift from his room, Gaston finally allowed himself to cry.

Seven Years Later

“Merry Christmas, Barney!” Gaston barged into the house, the door slamming against the frame. In his arms he balanced a present almost too big to fit through the doorway.  “... Er, Happy Hanukkah?”

Lefou laughed, adjusting the little nine month old on his lap.  “I don’t think he cares which holiday it’s for, as long as he gets that present,”

“Of course he gets it!”  Gaston said, falling onto the floor next to them.  “Only the best for my favorite nephew!”

Barney clapped his hands, reaching for the brightly colored box.

“He’s impatient, too,”  Gaston said.  “He gets that from me,”

“Logically, I’d say he doesn’t get anything from you,”  Lefou said, helping the little boy pull at the ribbon, “but I know both of you too well to say that,”

Gaston ruffled Barney’s auburn hair, prompting the baby to giggle, which had quickly become one of Gaston’s favorite sounds.

“Have you talked to Madeline recently?”  Despite his love for the holidays, Gaston knew that November and December were hard for Lefou.

Lefou nodded.  “I called her last night.  She’s doing pretty good.  She thinks her boyfriend will be proposing soon,”

“I hope I get a wedding invite,” Gaston said, with a laugh.

They watched as Barney’s face broke out into a wide smile as he finally got his present open.

“Whoa, Barney, look at that!” Lefou gushed, pointing out the details on the toy.  “Tell Uncle Gaston thank you!”

Barney couldn’t talk yet, but he gurgled a response.

“You’re welcome,”  Gaston said, watching as Lefou tried to one-handedly open the toy, while still balancing his son on his lap.

He hadn’t had an easy last few years, and Gaston knew he still struggled, but thanks to Barney, Lefou was happy again.

He deserved it.