#lemony things

[random-autie-fangirl]

The holy quartet of video game narrators which are actually living beings (...and also kinda suck)

[tellthatbrokebitch]

st text posts pt. xi

[starboundsingularities]

what if i told you i'm making this a series

similar posts: 0 | 1

[lemony-snickers]

"you are the only one who's ever broken me open."

"do not scream god's name, scream mine."

"please don't make me say it if you aren't going to say it back."

"your heart is beating so fast." "because i'm happy."

"i want to draw a map of your scars so i can always find my way back to your heart."

"i don't believe in such nonsense." "i'm not asking you to. i'm simply asking that you believe in me."

"is that good? that's all i want, to make you feel good."

"it reminded me of you. but then, sometimes i think everything reminds me of you."

"what a fragile thing, that love can so easily turn to violence."

"why are you doing this?" "because i love you."

"it didn’t feel right when I was always thinking of you."

"i would have felt like the luckiest person on the planet."

"are you gonna take that off or should i keep guessing?"

"i wanted this to be special."

"i can't believe... after all this time... i should have known it would be you."

"i want to be wildly, deliriously happy.  wildly, deliriously loved."

"i try always to be too much for you."

"the sooner i leave, the sooner i will return and we can begin again."

"i didn't die." "you were dead to me."

"i don't care if other people see us together, you do."

"and you say i'm the one who should be resting."

"i'm sorry." "for what?" "that you got stuck with me."

"what makes you happy?" "lots of things." "and what makes you unhappy?" "lots of other things and some of the same ones."

"i wish i could give you the world." "the world is not enough. but you are."

"i have never needed anything so much as i need you. and i hate you for it."

[whoslaurapalmer]

struck by an idea i refuse to commit to bc I firmly believe bea and bertrand did not know lemony was alive and i do not need to deal with this revelation at 11:53 at night but you know. what would make. an amount of sense. if they DID know. if they were in contact with him while he was on the run. all that time. if the things lemony writes about the kids and bea and bertrand in the books, the memories the kids have of their parents before the fire, were things he knew because bea and bertrand told him

[usefulquotes7]

When someone is crying, of course, the noble thing to do is to comfort them. But if someone is trying to hide their tears, it may also be noble to pretend you do not notice them. Lemony Snicket

[titan-god-helios]

y'all executive dysfunction sucks ass. THE ENTIRE DAY, all that's been going on in my head is a series of things that i reallyreallyreally want to do but i just c a n t. i wanna read ? nah not allowed to, stuck compulsively scrolling through youtube shorts i wanna write ? i have tons of motivation for writing ? so many ideas ??? all i need to do is walk a couple steps n pick up pen and paper and sit down but NO, i must play this game even though the prospect of writing is so much more appealing at this very moment ITS SO FUCKING STUPID and the fact that executive dysfunction occurs so frequently and not just for things that sound so boring or tedious or anxiety inducing and make my brain want to melt and my eyes gloss over BUT ALSO FOR THINGS I really WANT TO DO I JUST

d u d e .

[the-mother-of-lions]

To Beatrice Eddie—

[snckt]

If you are interested in stories with happy endings, you would be better off reading some other book. In this book, not only is there no happy ending, there is no happy beginning and very few happy things in the middle.

a (not-so) happy twenty-four years to three unlucky orphans, and their subsequent series of unfortunate events ✨🔥📕

[lannegarrett]

If writers wrote as carelessly as some people talk, then adhasdh asdglaseuy t[bn[ pasdlgkhasdfasdf.

- Lemony Snicket

[tele-mesmerism]

anyways since ive been pretty ok w middle grade stuff i realized i could try reading hdm... have been jealous of ppl who read them when they were the target age bc i usually cant stand ya/juvenile but. some stuffs been good! ill give it a chance!

[lemon-drop-soda]

I think the ongoing existence of something like H*talia proves that art doesn't need to look objectively good or have especially good writing to be considered valuable to its audience

What some people consider to be "bad media" can be works that resonate with a chosen audience, even if that resonance is something as decidedly shallow as slamming Ken doll faces together

[sometimes-love-is-enough]

weird question, but- if you were to do a series of unfortunate events au with sanders sides, how would you place characters into different roles? i was just curious since you mentioned in the jantigone annotations that you read lemony snicket (LOVED lemony snicket, childhood memories right there lol) and i was suddenly struck with a stark vision of snicket!janus narrating the ordeals of his dead ex-lover thomas's children and i wanted to know what ideas you might have ^^

What a brilliant question. If I ever wrote an ASOUE crossover, it would mostly likely be canonverse, because that’s the way my brain likes to go with these sort of things! I think c!Thomas would be quite awful at looking after a trio of orphaned children, and possibly even worse at seeing through a Count Olaf disguise, and I think even more fun would be had with setting the whole thing partly at a local theatre. Obviously playing a bit fast and loose with the way the Sides can interact with real people, but don’t I always?

Most things I write, and especially crossovers/fusions, are challenges to myself; i.e., me asking myself, can I write this certain strange thing and make it make sense? And in the case of a lot of the crossovers, the challenge and the fun is taking two different canons, often with different styles and sense of humor, and fusing them together smoothly. And in this case, the most fun bit about a ASOUE/TSS crossover for me would be performing that reconciliation of tone and style smoothly - and I think I could manage that best with canonverse. (If you've ever wondered why I write so many canon fusions, here's your answer.)

BUT if I were to take a route closer to the one you’re probably suggesting here, Janus as the Lemony narrator would indeed be very fun… but I think I’d probably actually lean more to LOGAN as the narrator character, and have Janus be an active VFD member (with the disguises and such). Not sure who is cast as the kids, I swore I’d never write another kidfic after the Matilda AU but I’m bad at keeping promises. I think maybe Remus and Roman as a twin duo would be funky, and if I’m doing that I might genuinely leave it as just the two of them, with the other Sides coming in and out of the narrative as required.

I think I’ve mentioned before that I don’t find straight-up role-replacement AUs terribly interesting to write for the most part; it’s much more fun to try to work out where the canon characters would fit into the universe as they are without trying to fit them into preordained boxes. In this case, I figure Virgil, Patton, Janus, and Thomas (maybe Emile too, why not?) would be Potential Guardians for the twins in this case, all with their own specific problems and Snicketesque Situations to deal with. No idea who the Olaf character would be. The Dragon Witch is always a good standby, I guess? Or maybe Remy? If I wrote this properly I'd put tons of thought into it, this is just me throwing things at the wall.

...That being said, fuckin LOVE Thomas as Janus's Beatrice. If anyone less inclined to weird esoteric crossover stuff than I am ever writes that, please let me know, I'd eat it all the way up.

[just-an-enby-lemon]

I'm having sad thoughts about Jacques again. About how he only seems like someone who has things figured out and is put together because we are seing him by very biased lens.

We are seing him by Lemony's eyes. The eyes of a man who idolized his older brother, who wanted to be like him. The eyes of someone who tends to either be extremely judgy or see everyone as better than himself and idealize them (often both at the same time).

We are in a different level seing him by the eyes of the Baudelraies. But they know little of Jacques and what they know is mostly that this is a man their parents knew, that promises answers and more important an adult that for the first time looks at Olaf in disguize and sees Olaf. Their view is biased at best.

We are also seing him by Quingleys eyes. But for Quingley Jacques was the man who found him lost in a tunnel alone and confused, griving and in danger and gave him something. That gave him some answers and food and a place to stay even if it was the abandoned house of one of his dead friends.

And even by everyone else Jacques is a Snicket, the Snickets are very competent and mostly loyal but also a bit weird. And Jacques is all that. But in comparrison to his sibblings? He has his life put together.

That's to say that Jacques is likely tired, overworked, traumatized and failing apart. But he can keep himself suave, well-read, well-dressed and calculating. He isn't taking obvious risky behavior like Kit. And he certainly isn't just a blurried bunch of trauma in a fedora like Lemony. So he appears to be someone that is fine. And that we shoudn't worry about.

[lemony-snickers]

everything is terrible, please tell me something good.

[somewhat-bored]

guys the reason Lemony hates polka music so much is because he was in a polka band.

I'm dying at the concept. Lemony Snicket in his early school years, being forced to pick an elective and he picks music, thinking that he might get a standard instrument like a flute or a piano. Only to get handed a fucking accordion. No other kid wanted to play the accordion, and there's this weird VFD tradition of having a polka band division and they needed someone to play the accordion.