#life is too short to get sad about pants that dont fit

[wetslug]

just went thru all my pants and put the ones that are too small away in the corner (and removed the darts from some) and legit i feel like a huge weight just got lifted

[ryosmne]

Three brats??

Dad!Sukuna x f!reader

So this is basically a comfort fic, featuring dad! Sukuna because the brainrot was too much. Ok so, the reader and Sukuna have a son together, yes their son is Yuuji, I know this is usually the single father Sukuna trope, but I wanted to give it a go, feedback is always appreciated. Thanks for brainrotting with me @likeab-o-s-s cause this is the reason this exists. That's all from me enjoy reading.

Warnings: none really, just family, heartwarming fluff.

The air was crisp and fresh, unusually refreshing for the beginning of summer. Parents were already gathered outside the daycare, Yuuji, y/n's and Sukuna's son attended, patiently waiting for their kids to run in their arms again.

Sukuna arrived a couple of minutes before the final bell on his motorcycle, he took off his helmet, leaned back on his bike and waited for the familiar little pink head of hair to come wobling to him.

The three mothers next to him, scooted a bit closer to him to get a better look nothing he's unfamiliar with and no one can blame them, Sukuna is a sight for sore eyes. Leather jacket with the sleeves rolled up, extenuating his board shoulders, exposing his tattoo covered skin, v neck white t shirt, allowing his toned chest and even more of his tattoos to show and a simple black pair of pants hugging his muscular thighs in the best of ways.

In the past some of the bolder ones had mustered the courage and asked him if he was a single father since they had never seen his son's mother, but with a laugh Sukuna brushed them off telling them how his lovely wife was a working parent and her schedule just didn't match the daycares. Maybe the very unconventional wedding rings they got weren't the best idea in this situation, even though they were extremely beautiful and unique.

"I really admire the work you put in the little guy" Sukuna's gaze met a woman who attempted to strike a conversation, oblivious to what she had meant by her statement he replied, maybe these three minutes would pass faster talking about normal things and not stressing about work.

"Don't we all put work on our kids?" He spoke calmly with a slight smile that he always wore when talking about Yuuji.

"Yeah, we do, but it still must be hard I can't imagine what you're going through" Sukuna's mind went to the worst scenario. Was Yuuji a trouble maker at school? He is a very well behaved child, both him and y/n made sure to teach him proper manners and how to be polite, that couldn't be it right?

The bell rung, and kids made their way out of the daycare, Yuuji in the blink of an eye was hugging his father's leg, exited to see him after the hours he was gone. In a swift motion Sukuna put Yuuji's little backpack on his own back and scooped the boy up in his arm.

"Yuuji's a pretty good kid, hes never been difficult" Sukuna smilled again resuming in the short conversation with the woman next to him. "Single father's like you don't get the credit they deserve". She spoke again smiling sadly down to the little pink haired boy who seemed too fixated on the earrings his father was wearing.

Sukuna finally understanding what this whole thing was about, chuckled, this had happened before after all, he should've known.

"I'm not a single parent, speaking of that your mom said she has a big surprise for you after dinner" he said directing his attention to his son again, the woman next to him quickly fumbled an apology for missundertanding, to which Sukuna replied to with a simple 'dont worry about it'. He placed Yuuji on his bike, put on both his and his boys helmet and drove off.

Y/n was still stuck at work, thankfully her husband would cook dinner tonight cause overtime was killing both her and her mood, good thing she finally had a day off tomorrow.

Y/n checked her phone to see how close she was to going home only to find a text that Yuuji's teacher had send her that was obviously meant for her husband.

Hello Mr Itadori, this is Mrs Laura from the day care. I was wondering if you wanted to get launch with me after school tomorrow, you can bring little Yuuji too, I'm awaiting your response, have a nice night.

What the hell was that? Well y/n's number was in Yuuji's contact information, she chuckled at the words displayed on her screen but she couldn't really blame the teach, Sukuna was a walking temptation, she knew that first hand, hell she fell head over heels for the dangerous looking guy who hid a heart of gold under his hard exterior, but the teacher could at least check who the number belonged to.

Y/n run her last errands and made sure to pick up Yuuji's surprise before heading home, she even tipped Sukuna off so their son wouldn't know what hit him.

Y/n made her way inside the family house, tossing her keys somewhere on the living room couch.

Yuuji immediately after hearing her car in the driveway came rushing down the stairs, jumping around her like he always did when she came home.

"Mom, mom you're home." The happiness was evident in the boys face, his smile was wide when y/n dropped to his level to pick him up and spin him around

"Yes I am little devil, did you give your father hell like we agreed?" She spoke in the happiest of tones with Yuuji still in her arms. Another set of arms engulfed her frame making her halt on spinning the little boy.

"So you're telling him to be a little brat now huh?" Sukuna's breath tickled the side of her neck and ear as he rested his head on her shoulder and wrapped his strong arms around her waist. "Welcome home love" he spoke again giving her jaw a ghost of a kiss.

"Daddy is the food ready" Yuuji spoke from y/n's arms, Sukuna only laughed at his son's appetite, and directed both him and y/n to the kitchen where he had already set everything up.

"Mommy, what is a single dad?" Yuuji asked in the middle of dinner in typical fashion of his, any question he had from something he heard through the day would always come up during dinner.

"Well Yuuji, single fathers are the fathers who raise their kids alone." The young boy seemed to think about his mother's words before speaking again. "So its just a daddy ?" Yuuji asked again with his eyes growing a bit sadder, his mother nodded, and Yuuji's eyes started to water.

"Baby what's wrong?" y/n asked. "Hey buddy what's going on?" Sukuna was growing quite concerned too. Yuuji burst in tears leaving his seat, climbing up his dad and hugging him tightly. Sukuna was rubbing his back to comfort the young boy and y/n's hand was stroking the kids hair in an effort to calm him down. "B-but why did that lady c-call you that, is m-mommy l-leaving?" Everything seemed to click for Sukuna, y/n was still confused but in the calmest sweetest voice said "Yuuji, baby look at me, I'm not going anywhere ok?" And the boy left his father's arms and clung on to her like his life depended on it.

Sukuna cracked a few jokes and lightened Yuuji's mood so he could enjoy the rest of his dinner, which went pretty well, he was his smiling adorable self very soon after his parents reassured him that none of them were ever leaving his side and the boy was now drawing with crayons in the living room. He seemed to have completely forgotten about the surprise his father mentioned when he picked him up.

Y/n and Sukuna were doing the dishes in the kitchen, each one talking about their day, Sukuna explained the awkward conversation he had at the daycare that sparked Yuuji's sadness, y/n took a turn in talking about how her son's teacher, basically asked Sukuna out on a date but messed up and texted her. "How about you set up a date and you show up? I mean it's you she texted right?" Sukuna joked "Babe, that's cruel" y/n chuckled at her husband's mischievous nature.

"So you've got everything ready?" Sukuna asked. "yeah who'll bring him over?"

"You do it I'll keep Yuuji busy."

Sukuna joined Yuuji on the couch. "What are you drawing little brat?" Y/n heard him ask their boy in the usual sweet tone he had with him. She made her way down the basement, where she kept the surprise since she came home. Yuuji was going to love this, Sukuna was too, she knew she was already in love as well.

Y/n climbed the stairs quickly, and snuck up behind her son, who was occupied by his dad, she gently tapped the boys shoulder.

"A PUPPY" Yuuji announced exited making sure his voice was still soft not to scare the eager dog that his mom brought to his arms. Yuuji gently held the puppy that was licking his face as he was in a fit of laughter and excitement. Sukuna was as exited as his son and y/n had a huge smile on her face too. Their son had begged and begged for a dog ever since his best friend, Megumi got a black German shepherd puppy. Of course y/n and Sukuna wanted to comply to Yuuji's request right away, but they took time to teach little Yuuji everything there was about the responsibility of owning a dog. They took him to dog cafes and shelters, so he would be the perfect little dog owner, they taught him patience and responsibility beforehand. Sukuna visited the local shelter and decided with y/n on a white Shepard puppy that Yuuji always pointed out in your visits because 'he looks like Megumi's puppy they can be friends like we are' who can say no to that little adorable devil?

The puppy momentarily left Yuuji's arms to lick Sukuna's face. "Now we've got two little brats and a big one in our house." He laughed, enjoying the moment.

Y/n was admiring her son and husband as well as the newest member of the family with a smile plastered wide on her face, life was indeed beautiful.

The next day, both Sukuna and y/n were waiting for Yuuji to finish school, since y/n had the day off. Sukuna had his arm protectively around her because this time, others were staring at what was his, but he was proud to show her off to everyone, even in a place as mundane as his son's daycare.

[pattytacuri]

5/14/22

I'm beginning to think I've had a more open and honest relationship with Tumblr than any men in my life. 😭🤣 maybe I'd rather be vulnerable and raw with a bunch of strangers . This is the first time I've written anything all day. Idk what possessed me to but as soon as I got home, I decided to try on almost 75 percent of my closet to see what fits and doesn't fit. If anyone knows me and my closet...they know I own like a million and one outfits . 😭🤣 fucking bpd impulsivity with spending. Clothes have a strange way of telling a story...for example, I still had the pants I interviewed with for my current job ( size 12-not keeping , too big) , the blue dress I got married in ( keeping it for, cute and I might burn it one day) , the black floral dress I went to my friend's 6 year old son's funeral too in late 2015 😭 ( keeping-still fits and I couldn't bear to part with it) , the teal romper I went into a terrible BPD episode with and dissociated in after a fight with my ex in the summer (idk -haven't tried it on-dont know what I'm doing with it yet) , the super short and tight black dress I got drunk in and made a tik tok in with my BFF this summer( keeper- too sexy to give away) , or the blue sweater I first drove independently in October also crashed in November in (its cute so keeper!) , etc, etc.

Anyways, I started to get tired and feel off, and then I realized..mercury is still in retrograde and it's been 10 months from my breakup and ugh...kinda cringy but I had to listen to "Clean" by T Swift cause of lyrics 🙃 and I whined for 30 minutes to my best friend about how haha..grief about it is here. Ugh. My best friend is beyond understanding, I admitted to her a truth out loud about it I hadn't been able to get out and it was good. Honestly, at this point, I'm at this really good place with everything about it. My bpd heart and soul have finally caught up with my logical side of it all. My logical side understand and accepts hard things and acts accordingly but it's hard to get my untamed bpd heart and soul to be on the same page with it. My logical side is 41 and so responsible and practical but idk that bpd soul and heart are irrational. In therapy my logical side is reasonable mind and my bpd side is emotional mind and to get both on them on the same side is wise mind which means tada ...I now have emotional regulation! Ugh...I'm in a dbt group therapy group and all of are there cause we all suck in one way or another with regulating our emotions. Our therapist keeps saying we all probably grew up in emotionally invalidating households and he's not wrong. Where was I going with this before my whole therapy tangent. Oh yes, I'm in my most radical acceptance and wise mind part of the grief. The anger about it has dissipated, I wish all the best for him, etc , etc. There are just these small droplets of grief that show up but at least it's not the hurricane or tornado that lasted for days or weeks.

Tomorrow I start swimming lessons with a private instructor and I hope I do well. I almost drowned at 11 thanks to my dad's drunk negligence so I hope my instructor is patient and understanding. If this works out, I'm gonna try some kind of dancing lessons cause why not. I have no rhythm but if I learned to drive again, anything is possible. I also need to lose 6 lbs. 😭 its sad that I like to eat cake and tacos and can't see myself going back to just salad. 🤣😭

[if-the-crown-fits-translate-it]

Discord pt 48

[Date: 24/02, 09.33 PM - 24/02, 10.32 GMT]

Viscount: “Hello! There was one question one of you asked that I did not want to answer on tumblr. You asked yet again for a "fit check" which is understandable, I am not some cartoon character that only wears one outfit”

[People ask why he didn’t want to share on the blog.]

Viscount: “I have my circlet of course which is gold, like most everyone's in the court aside from Prince, which has three red gems set into it. I am currently wearing a brown sweater over a white collared shirt with grey dress pants and of course my boots :) Demonia's? I believe you called them?”

[People compliment his style.]

Viscount: “I did not want to answer on the blog seeing as you all may find it a bit.. Distracting from the other questions you were asking :)”

[Jack the Observer: “Viscount you are so fucking stylish]

Viscount: “Why thank you :)”

[donti: “Veyecount is there other things, no way you came here just to talk about fits”]

Viscount: “Were you expecting something more? Why dont you share your thoughts :)”

[Jack the Observer:  “How did operating the blog go? You said you wanted to try something new.”]

Viscount: “It was very confusing and took much longer than expected... I hope Crown isn't too upset with how long it took..”

[A random Spark: “We want to hear from you as well”]

Viscount: “You'll have to ask more directly what you expect from me :) I'm afraid I cannot read minds”

[donti: “You talked about your sister a lot. Maybe tell us more about her?”]

Viscount: “Oh Countess? Yes she's lovely isn't she? I'm so happy to have her back :) It was so lonely without her”

[donti: “Its sweet that you found her! I have siblings myself and it wold be terrible if we were separated for so long. What did you do while she was gone?”]

Viscount: “I was very sad while she was gone, at the time she was all I had left. Being without her almost destroyed me. But she found me again, so it's okay! :)”

[Singletsona |Stars: “How long was she in the family before you?”]

Viscount: “Countess? Oh she's only been in the family a month longer than I have :) So she's been here for two months and I’ve been here for one :)”

[fetch: “So you were without her for a whole month? Why didn't she tell you where she was going?”]

Viscount: “She left a few months before she joined this family... I didn't know where she was for... What felt like a very long time”

[donti: “And how was she different afterwards?”]

Viscount: “Well, she's Countess now of course! Can you imagine a child being called "Countess"?”

[fetch: “That sounds horrible :[ She just... up and left?”]

Viscount:  “I don't.....know”

Viscount: “I don't remember much of when she left”

Viscount: “She was just... gone”

[daengelinotfound: “How old were you two when she left?”]

Vicount: “It was only a few months ago... I think”

[fetch: “I'm so sorry... at least you have her back though! That's gotta be a relief :]?”]

Viscount: “It is! It's such a relief to have her back. I can see her every day if I want to! I didn't leave her side for most of the last month. When Crown asked me to join the server, I had to leave her again but I still get to see her very often :)”

[A random Spark: “You don't remember?”]

Viscount: “I don't remember what caused her to leave. I don't know if I want to remember. She's back now though and that's what matters :) We're a family again!”

[A random Spark: “I try and write things down to remember. Some memories are bad”]

Viscount: “Mhm”

[Singletsona |Stars: “Isn't it weird that you just...don't remember what happened though?”]

Viscount:  “I- yes. It is a bit odd...”

[fetch: “Sometimes the stuff you don't want to remember is the stuff you really need to.”]

Viscount: “...”

[A random Spark: “All memories are important”]

Viscount: “I agree...”

[fetch:  “Just- look. You wanted us to ask questions, right? This is what we're asking. Isn't it strange how you have seemingly the best memory out of the entire Court, but you don't remember what could be the most important time in your life? When your sister left?”]

Viscount: "That wasn't directed towards me you-”

[A this point, Viscount started to send messages that automatically deleted after a short amount of time. We didn’t manage to screenshot the first few; the rest are recognizable by a clock emoji (⏲️) at the end.]

[Deleted messages w/o screenshot:]

Viscount: “I asked you to ask questions to further your knowledge, yes.”

Viscount: “But you have to realize that I intended you to ask the others, not me”

Viscount: “These gaps in my memories are... Concerning yes”

Viscount: “But I honestly dont think they’re of much important in the end. What’s done is done”

[A random Spark: “You need to write down things then, where he can't see”]

Viscount: “You don't think I have been?” (deleted)

[fetch: “Why are you deleting your messages?”]

Viscount: “So that he can't read them, Fetch” (deleted)

[fetch: “Where are you putting your hidden writings? Just tell us so we can tell you when you forget.”]

Viscount: “I.. haven't forgotten. Anything. I remember everything since being reunited with Countess. It's my memories beforehand that get....blurry” (deleted)

[A random Spark: “One shouldn't fear family”]

Viscount: “I know...” (deleted)

[fetch: “Just because you remember now doesn't mean you won't forget later.”]

Viscount: “I know.” (deleted)

[Void: “Vis, Crown once said that Prince will see things on the translation blog. Does Crown also check that blog?”]

Viscount: “I.. I dont know what Crown can and cannot see. I'm sorry, I don't have an answer for you”

Viscount: “I have to go now... It was nice talking to you all

I will see you tonight :)”

[freebooter4ever]

my dad group texted my brother and i, highly unusual, and i think jordan was weirded out too cause his response was equally short and confused. on the list of things my little brother and i have never discussed, our dad’s relative interest or lack there of in our lives is pretty high. dad’s been messaging me since october, asking about stuff like where my next living plans are (which he has never done since i first moved out age eighteen), and i’ve only been vaguely responding to the point blank questions cause its just. so. weird. i think my grandpa’s death has shaken dad’s worldview a bit more than he’s been letting on.

he alienated my brother and i pretty much immediately after his secretive marriage to the bottle blonde rich bitch when i was 22. he kicked my brother out as soon as jordan turned 18, and when i discovered this by coming home one summer and seeing jordan wasnt in the house, i got so fucking mad that it was the first time i ever had a full out screaming match at my dad. and apparently this display of anger was when rich bitch decided she didn’t like me (probably valid, but also ironic because pretty much from birth it was known in my entire extended family that dad and i were almost identical personality wise, and both of us have tempers where we will not get mad at anything but frustration will build up and up until on the rare blue moon it boils over, and oh boy. watch out. those moments were the only times i was ever scared of my dad as a kid and i think it only happened twice in my entire life)(if she thinks im crazy when im angry, she should see my dad)

but i was crazy mad because while i was lucky enough to be put in therapy due to attempting to starve myself into non existence at age 13 (many many sessions of ‘family’ therapy with me in the center of a long couch silently trying to pretend i was invisible and my mom two feet away at one end and dad on the opposite end of the couch, and my mom doing all the talking, ranting and raving about how im starving myself to punish her. and then the therapist kicking both my parents out and trying to convince me to say a few words, and her finally getting me to realize that how my mom treated me was not normal and not something i needed to put up with if it made me sad and scared, and then the therapist realizing that i was still too sad and scared to confront it, and her and i coming up with a compromise where we would tell my mom that i was just ‘really attached’ to dad’s house and it wasnt that i was terrified of living with my mom or liked my dad better, it was that i just really liked living in one place instead of out of a suitcase and moving every week), and so had both the therapist and my dad supporting me when at fourteen i finally said enough was enough and demanded that my dad get full custody so i didnt have to spend every other week with my abusive mother anymore - while i got out of that situation, my brother didnt. i tried, he knew that it was my decision to live full time with dad and i made it clear he could do the same, but just as it was a given that i was identical to dad’s personality, my brother was identical to mom’s so i think he was more attached to her than i was. either way, he always refused and insisted on continuing to live between both of them. after i hit driving age, my dad transferred responsibility to me for shuttling my brother to and from my dad’s house to my mom’s apartment. dad’d lock himself in his room, or go to the gym, and i’d turn on an endless rotation of star wars movies for jordan and i to watch before i had to take him to his next week’s place (phantom menace was our favorite cause darth maul was just cool ok, dont judge).

anyway, the last day i ever stayed at my moms house, my brother was there. and i must have been twenty or twenty one because he would have only been around seventeen. but even at seventeen he was well over six foot five cause he got all the height in the family which was totally not fair but thats besides the point. so while i was there my mom flew into one of her alcohol induced rages, and took it all out on my brother. i had intellectually figured that all the anger my mom used to take out on me had then transferred to my brother once i stopped living there every other week, but up until that point i hadn’t actually seen it. she started shoving him, and punching him, and not enough so it would hurt much, because as i said he was well over six feet and she was barely five six, so he could pretty well block any thing she dished out. but he was cornered, and he looked scared. and i was hiding useless on the stairwell, crying, and begging mom to stop. and it only stopped cause jordan managed to slip out the front door and once he escaped mom went back into the kitchen, still yelling and angry. and i took the chance to grab my school bag and leave in solidarity. and my brother and i stood there awkwardly on the porch, me still crying, and him smoking and trying to look cool and not like he just got chased out of the apartment by a woman half his size. and i promised him we wouldnt go back until she calmed down, and that she was being unreasonable and he didnt deserve any of it, and id figure out somewhere to go. and we started walking down the sidewalk, but not together because we were never that close. he wandered off somewhere to smoke. and that’s as far as i remember.

this day came up in conversation with my grandma in the months after grandpa’s death, during one of our many three am can’t sleep conversations in grandma’s kitchen (grandma would wake up, i’d hear her get out of bed and wake up too. she’d make herself tea and eat some graham crackers and we’d sit together at the table feeling the third empty chair like an ache). grandma brought it up, because apparently, even though i cant remember this at all, i had my no/kia brick phone in my school bag (a minor miracle because i hated carrying around cell phones for the longest time), and i actually called grandma. and grandpa and her came to pick me up, and they found me sitting on a wall a block away from my mom’s apartment, and then we drove around till we found jordan, and then we all went back to my grandparent’s house. after bringing this up, grandma then, completely unprompted, told me something that child me thought about regularly - she said that even though her mom died when she was 8, leaving her to help raise her two younger siblings, grandma thought in some ways it was easier than what my brother and i went through with the divorce and my mom leaving. i used to regularly - not wish my mom dead, exactly - but wish i could pretend she was dead, rather than her just not being there anymore. especially since, when i was suddenly thrown into being her sole emotional and physical punching bag now that dad wasn’t filling the role anymore, a lot of the times being around her post divorce was not a good thing. (I cut off all contact with my mom finally at age 25 and haven’t looked back)

so yeah, i was fucking pissed that i had worked so hard to try to mitigate the damage i caused by leaving jordan alone with my mom for pretty much the entirety of my high school years...only to have my dad kick him out barely a few years after i left for college and thus putting my brother at my mom’s mercy. ostensibly my dad kicked my brother out because of his drug addictions, but my brother was the most mild mannered addict i’ve ever known. the worst thing he ever did was steal a couple hundred dollars from me, but he never got violent, he never got angry. other people got angry at him. my aunt once tried to fight him in a hospital elevator because he sold my cousin heroin or meth or some shit and my cousin ended up impaling a knife in his chest in front of my grandma, which is a whole nother story. but jordan was only nineteen when that happened. my cousin? thirty six. and a long time violent and angry drug addict with a record (he threw a book at his professor’s head and got kicked out of grad school while on cocaine once, which is how he ended up back in washington state and needing a new drug dealer - hence my brother suddenly getting involved) (same cousin later flew into a drug fueled rage in his forties and almost beat his girlfriend to death) (my brother was long since clean by then and had nothing to do with our cousin getting drugs at that point)

all this to say my dad’s rich bitch new wife didn’t think a drug addict and mentally ill artist fit into her picture perfect family, so dad started making it clear we were not welcome at family functions unless we complied with very strict rules. ironically, jordan was let back into the fold first partially because i can hold a grudge for a very long time and i was very very terrified of my mom and dad was the sane stable one and i had trusted him to take care of everything even without me there and dad had failed pretty spectacularly at that. im still bitter at my dad for his secret marriage and subsequent moving into her million dollar mansion and throwing my brother out. but also partially because jordan started following all of dad’s rules, got himself cleaned up (he moved in with his girlfriend, and i think being out of mom’s house had a lot to do with getting over his addictions), started studying computer science, found a really good software engineering job, suddenly dad approved of him. i also partially antagonized rich bitch wife by doing silly things like wearing black leather pants and the most provocative clothes i owned whenever i went over to their house. rich bitch was a very simple narrow minded person with a lot of prejudices. i imagine i was not seen as a good influence on her two younger daughters. and eventually they stopped seeing me altogether. even when i was living in washington for all of 2017 - the only time i ever saw dad was when he’d come visit my grandparents alone. the day before i took grandma on the train to move to ohio, we were supposed to all have dinner together at our family’s favorite place to eat out - crossroads mall - and the rich bitch refused to show up. that’s how petty she is. she also is so dumb she’s under the delusion that kids get into drugs if they don’t have dogs (????) so that’s why she forced my dad to get a dog for her spoiled brat youngest when the girl went into high school. my dad dislikes animals, so i will say one of the highlights of this marriage is seeing my dad become a dog person. the rich bitch and her daughters mostly ignore the dog, but my dad is so attached to max that he even lets the little puppy sit in his lap while driving. anyway, anyone who thinks dogs are the sole answer to preventing drug addictions can go to hell.

yeah, blah blah blah, to sum up its WEIRD for my dad to suddenly be texting my brother and i unprompted, and asking me about my life and my plans. i dont really know how to deal. i miss him. he was always the closest person in my life to the point where even when i moved away for college, i still assumed after i graduated i’d just move back in with dad so it was only four years being gone, cause why would i ever want to live anywhere else?. i kept thinking if i could hit some level of success that he would approve of, that maybe eventually i could become somebody his rich bitch wife would associate with. but that never happened, obviously. 

[nie7027]

Super5 headcanons part 4

Part 1     Part 2     Part 3  Part 4   Part 5

And thats how they found themselves one saturday morning in the parking lot of the closest mall with no idea how to go about this

Hatori, who already regretted this, was regretting it even more when he noticed how crowded the place was "so... What do we do if someone recognizes him as the prime minister kidnapper? "

"We have come before and no one has recognized us so far..." said shibata a little hesitant "what makes you think this time it would be different?"

"Well i dont know...how about the fact it was internationally televised"

"So were you destroying that army helicopter" quipped Shimazaki from behind "if you are so scared you shouldnt have come"

"Who do you think is gonna pay for your shit dumbass?!"

"Did i ask you to do it?" Shimazakis glasses were obscuring his eyes but the glare was evident "I am the one forced to come. I DONT NEED YOU-"

"BOTH OF YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP" Minegishi yelled before Shimazaki could say anything further "Hatori! we have gone through this before. Everything willl be fine and if it isnt then we'll deal with it and Shimazaki no one is forcing you to do this! we talked and you accepted, you cant turn back now"

When both of them kept quiet Minegishi thanked god(gods? Whoever was in charge of his stupid life) for it and rubbed his temples, a headache already threatenint its way

Although Shimazaki had been mostly right in saying they forced him to come they would never give him the reason

Besides its not like he couldnt transport away at any moment. If he was here it was because at some level he actually wanted and it was enough for them.

"Cmon guys, people are starting to stare" Shibata, bless him, decided to take charge at that instant and ushered them inside

"So...where do we start? " said Hatori wearily glancing at the different stores there were

"How about we start by replacing his jacket?" mused Shibata "i think its the item that attracts attention the most"

"Whats wrong with my jacket?"

"It has bullet holes"

"And scorching marks"

"Scorch marks? That fucking kid..."

"You didnt notice? It used to have blood stains too but they were gone after i washed it...was it even yours?"

"How would i know?"

The three men sighed at this before minegishi spoke "Okay...that settles it then. Well start by the jacket"

"Oh how about we get him a sweater? I actually need some myself and they are in offer!" said Hatori excitedly pointing at the store where he usually bought his

"Im sorry man but someone needs to tell you...your taste in sweaters suck" admitted Shibata making Shimazaki snicker

"Says the guy who only wears shorts and nike t shirts"

"IM A GYM INSTRUCTOR"

"So? Why does everybody need to know at all times?"

Minegishi, for the second time that day. interrupted the fight between his friends "Im sorry Hatori but Shibatas right"

"What?" asked Hatori feeling betrayed

"I mean...the pigeon sweater?"

"Oh for the lord of-You know what? FINE! Whatever! I dont care! But thats a start and none of you have a better idea." Hatori smirked knowing he was right when the others didnt said anything "Besides he is going to pick his clothes so you dont have to worry about my "horrible taste" and fuck you guys, that sweater was awesome"

Shimazaki watched amused the exchange that followed while they walked to the supoosed sweater store. It remind him of the reason he accepted coming.

He was getting used to these petty fights and actually found them kind of funny.

Maybe coming wasnt as bad of a idea as it felt at first

Maybe it was

"So do you like the burgundy one?" asked Shibata when he noticed Shimazaki finally picked something

"Whats burgundy?" replied Shimazaki who had only grabbed something that felt soft

"Its kind of like red...but darker"

"Shibata I dont know what red is"

"Oh...thats....thats sad man"

Minegishi facepalmed before picking more red sweaters and handing them to Shimazaki "Red is actually the color of the t shirt you are wearing so it's close to your current style. Here. These are red too just...try them out and see if you like any"

"I cant believe i forgot he cant see" said Shibata while Shimazaki went to dressing room

"It happens to best of us" responded Minegishi

Some minutes later Shimazaki returned with 2 sweaters including the burgundy he had picked

"So how did it go?" asked minegishi retrieving the sweaters from Shimazakis hands

"They felt soft"

"And?"

"And....what?" this was new fo Shimazaki and he didnt know what answer were they expecting

"How did the fit? How did you feel the neck? The chest?"

" they just fitted"

"Really?" shibata checked the tags "these are two sizes apart. Didnt one feel too loose or too tight?"

Shimazaki tried to remember but he didnt actually paid attention to that.

Luckily for him Hatori decided that moment to come back.

"Hey guys how its going? I talked with the cashier and he said that theres a 2x1 offer. So we can-oh, you already got 2? How did you know?"

He wasnt expecting the others to shrug

"Okay..." continued Hatori "Are you finished? I already got mine"

"Do you want those?" Minegishi asked and sighed when the other man kept silence

Shimazaki didnt know. Sure, they have felt nice but so did his current clothes. Besides minegishi was asking if he "wanted" them and Shimazaki wasn't used to actually considering if he wanted them. Usually there wasnt many options.

"How did you pick your clothes?" tried Shibata

it was shimazakis turn to shrug "I just robbed them and kept what fitted"

"What? Who did you rob to get your current clothes" said Hatori surprised "i thought you had this aesthethic going"

"What?"

" You know like bad boy style. Kinda like grease"

"What"

"Grease? The musical-"

"ANYWAY" interrupted Minegishi "we are barely starting. Lets try somewhere else"

After that they went to other stores to try other clothes but each time the same scene of shimazaki, being unconfortable and not caring that much for what they picked, repeated and Shibata was having none of that.

He pulled Shimazakis arm turning him back. "Okay, man. From the clothes you are wearing right now. Which one do you actually like?"

It took shimazaki a full minute to answer but he finally said "The jacket"

Without thinking it twice Shibata dragged him to the first leather jacket store he saw, the others following close behind and scanned the items looking for a model that resembled Shimazakis the most.

Minegishi who had been looking at the tags glanced back to shibata "Are you sure about this? These are really expensive"

Shibata didnt reply and kept looking until he found what he wanted and smiliing turned to shimazaki"Take off your jacket and try this"

Shimazaki did as he said (and almost suceed at hiding the apprehesion Shibata had seen before when handing his jacket) and frowned when he put on the other. "Did you just hand me back my jacket again?"

Shibatas smile grew wider "Nop"

Shimazaki didnt believe him so he started to feel around for the bullet holes he knew were in the back and "stared" in disbelief when he couldnt find any of them.

Shibata resisted the urge to laugh "If you dont believe me check the sides. It has pockets"

"Maybe i never noticed mine had pockets" said Shimazaki stuffing his hands into the new pockets

"Sure man" shibata looked at the others "What do you think?"

"What am i suppsed to think? He looks exactly the same" said Hatori "At least this one isnt falling apart"

" Are you sure? Did you looked at the price" asked Minegishi again

Shibata glanced back at a now pouting Shimazaki who still had his hands stuffed inside the pockets and nodded "Its not like i will be broke if I buy it"

Shibata returned Shimazaki his old jacket and after paying for the new one he and the others gathered around Shimazaki

"Now shimazaki. Your pants"

"What about them?"

" what dont you like about your pants?"

Shimazaki looked offended "who said i dont like my pants?"

"You. You said it was the jacket what you liked the most and not the pants so theres sometjing about tjem you dont like" pointed out Minegishi

"Is the tightness isnt it?" Hatori asked with a smirk

"I actually like the tightness" deadpanned shimazaki and then looked like something disgusting crossed his mind but Hatori started screaming

"AH CMON! IM NOT BUYING HIM SLUTTY SKIN TIGHT LEATHER PANTS. DO YOU KNOW WHERE WE WILL HAVE TO GO-"

Minegishi covered hatoris mouth with his hand shutting him definitely "what did you think?"

"I liked shibatas clothes" Shimazaki reluctantly grumbled out

"AND THATS ANOTHER POINT FOR THE NIKE SHORTS GUY" bragged Shibata

"I liked Minegishis socks too"

"Wha-When did you use my socks?"

Shimazaki shrugged "That week you were hiding with them"

"You little piece of-"

They went to buy those and other clothes they deemed necesary ("STOP BEING CHILDREN YOU TWO. HE NEEDS UNDERWEAR TOO" yelled an embarrased Minegishi after the others laughed at him for suggesting it). Trying to get at least 2 items of each type of clothes

Eventually Shimazaki admitted he had liked the sweaters he tried first too and Hatori gladly bought them even though none of them correctly fitted (one was too tight and one was too loose)

With bags in hands they set out to leave and were talking about what to eat when Hatori cut it "Hey guys. Before we go i need to go to the bethroom!"

"Cant you wait till we go to eat?"

"If i could i would"

"Ugh fine. Do you even know where the bathroom is?

"There are six. Two in each floor. the closest to us in the middle, we passed it some minutes ago." shimazaki unexpectly said

Minegishit, shibata and Hatori stared baffled at him.

"How do you know...?"

"Mental eye?" said Shimazaki like it was the most obvious thing in the world "Theres so many people that I basically can see a complete map of the mall"

"Yeah but how do you know when you are seeing a bathroom?" asked curiously Hatori

The three of them started laughing when Shimazaki refused to answer

While they waited for Hatori Shibata glanced around and almost smacked himself in the head when he noticed certain store.

With all the drama of the clothes Shibata had completely forgotten the real reason they were here. Luckily for him it was in front of them

"LOOL GUYS! A PET STORE!"

Minegishi looked to where Shibata pointed and hummed "we could go look around while we wait"

"Why would we-" Shibata pulled again shimazakis arm not letting him finish his question and dragged him inside the store.

'Please let it be one of those stores please let it be one of those stores' kept repeating Shibata in his head until Minegishi pointed at one side of the store "Look, they have a pet zone"

Victory! "Lets go!"

Shimazaki followed Minegishi and Shibata to the far end of the store where a lots of kids were and stood awkwardly not knowing what to do when Shibata suddenly handed him a little ball of fur.

Heartbeats. Blood flowing. Breaths. Warm. Soft. Oh no.

When Hatori finally found them after searching for minutes it was to the scene of Shimazaki sitting on the floor the floor, face being licked by one of the five puppies sitting on his lap....Was he crying? (No he wasnt but it was close)

Minegishi and Hatori were loudly gasping while Shibata kept saying variations of "I told you guys!" "You didnt believe me"

It was a good day for Shibata.

At night Minegishi. And Shimazaki were facing a new problem he hadnt considered. Where would they put Shimazaki stuff?

"I thought you could use my wardrobe but its too small..." minegishi had forgotten how much of a space his uniforms occuped.

Shimazaki suddenly dissapeared and after some minutes teletransported back with some boxes and ignored when Minegishi asked him from where did he got them "People use boxes to store things. We can use them"

"I guess? But it will be a hassle to pile and unpile them whenever-I have an idea"

without further ado Minegishi activated his powers and with the plants and the boxes built and cabinet of sorts in tje licing room "This will have to do for a while"

They spent the rest of the night folding the clothes (more like Minegishi trying to teach Shimazaki how to do it) and then went to sleep.

Since Shimazaki was overpowered by a bunch of puppies(YEAH SHIBATA YOU WERE RIGHT WE WERE WRONG CAN YOU JUST SHUT UP), Hatori decided something must have broken inside him because he developed a new habit: He started to pet every dog he encountered

And "Encountered" was a way to put it

After the third scream that afternoon Hatori shaked his head while waiting for the man to come back

"SHIMAZAKI FOR THE LAST TIME STOP POPPING OUT OF NOWHERE"

"Why?"

"BECAUSE YOU SCARE THE SHIT OUTTA PEOPLE!"

"So?"

Hatori groaned dragging his hands along his face and then turned to walk away /flee the scene

" I knew we should have stayed back in the apartment playing videogames"

"I told you I didnt want to come" shimazaki whined

Hatori just glared at him and walked faster not caring whether the bastard followed him or not. Why was he stuck babysitting Shimazaki on his off day? Oh yeah, minegishi was working and Shibata...fuck shibata! How could he forget his wallet "well, you wouldnt have had to come if you had accepted to take him his wallet"

Shimazaki somewhat got offended by that "Iike some kind of delivery guy? What a waste of my powers. Besides if i had taken it to him he wouldnt have invited us to dinner"

"Okay. First of all delivery guys are the foundation of modern society and you should respect them and second SHIBATA DIDNT INVITE YOU YOU INVITED YOURSELF"

Shimazaki just shrugs "so? Its shibata! He always pays for me"

"Aaaand the manchild cant see why thats wrong" hatori mutters

"Hatori Im blind"shimazaki deadpans

"YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHAT-"

Shimazaki who was clearly ignoring Hatori perks up "Hes coming"

"Who is-?" hatori doesnt need to ask once he sees shibata giant form turning the corner ahead

"Hi guys!" Shibata greets waving at them .

Hatori hesitantly waves back "Shibata? What are you doing here? Didnt you have a class?"

"Boss had an emergency and we had to close early"

"Oh damn i hope it wasnt something serious-"

"WHO CARES? CAN WE GO ALREADY?" shimazaki whines

Shibata laughs and pats him on the back "Shimazaki! buddy, Im glad you came!"

Hatori rolls his eyes "the only reason he came was the food. He didnt even want you bring your wallet to you which reminds me" he takes out the wallet and gives it to him " you left it on the kicthen counter"

Shibata takes it and smiles "thank you man, you are the best!...so where do you guys want go?"

Shimaza was already opening his mouth to declare what he wanted when hatori pointed at accusatory finger at him "oh no! Dont even dare! Minegishi and Shibata spoil you enough"

Shibata frowned at him "We dont spoil him-"

Hatori turned to look at him with a face that said 'You gotta be kidding me' "YES YOU DO! He picked the last two times and I already had to deal with his bullshit all day so today I get to pick where we go!" hatori crossed his arms "besides it was me who brought the wallet"

"What? No! The places you pick are lame." shimazaki explaimed "shibata tell him!"

"Im sorry bud, he has a point there. You picked the last two times and its only fair he gets to pick today"

Shibata had to resist the laugh at seeing shimazaki sulk and Hatori stuck his tongue out at him.

After hatori proclaimed where he wanted to got they started to walk in that direction. Shibata carefully observed Hatori.

"So...what did shimazaki do to make you mad like that?" asked Shibata after a few minutes of walking

"He scared three persons on our way here" mumbled Hatori while he texted on his phone

"Three persons?" shibata looked back at shimazaki who walked behing with his hands in his pockets "Why?!"

Shimazaki shrugged "Its not my fault people are so easy to scare"

Not undertanding shibata turned to hatori confused

Hatori sigued and without looking from his phone he replied "He is doing again that thing where he teleports to pet nearby dogs"

Shibata groaned "Buddy! We have told you already theres no need to teletransport, you can just walk up to them and ask the owner if you can pet their dog"

Shimazaki rolled his eyes "Wheres the fun in that?"

"The fun is in the fact i wouldnt have to run 3 different times in less than 1 hour because of you" hissed Hatori finnally pocketing his phone

"Besides" picked Shibata " You cant go around petting peoples dogs"

"Huh? Why not?" rebuked Shimazaki "All dogs like to be petted!"

"Because you have to ask the owners permission first you dingus! Some people dont like to be molested "

"And there are some special dogs who shouldnt be petted or they get distracted from their duty "

"Oh! I heart about that-"

"They are dogs" Shimazaki snapped "What duty could dogs possibly have?"

Both men turned to him surprised "You dont know? You must know"

"About what?" answered Shimazaki

"Service dogs? You know...Dogs that help blind people? "

"What?"

Thats how they spend dinner explaining to shimazaki about service dogs

Later that night when a text from Minegishi saying "Who was the idiot who told Shimazaki about service dogs??" came they both ignored it

Feeling guilty for letting Minegishi crush Shimazakis dreams of having a dog after being the ones who told him in the first place, Hatori and Shibata arranged a day to accompany Shimazaki to pet dogs.

Susprinsingly the man had listened to them and stopped popping besides every person who walked their dog and instead waited for Hatori or Shibata to let him know when he could pet the dog.

Due to how complicated that was they soon found a solution: stray dogs were free of hassle even if they were more difficult to find.

"You know? The day he tries to keep one of them we will be in big trouble" mussed Hatori after Shimazaki dissapeared probably finding another stray

"i dont know. Minegishi was very harsh." Shibata laughed remebering that day " I doubt hell try it anytime soon"

Hatori hummed "Do you think hell stay there this time or wil he bring it-"

As in cue Shimazaki reappered, a dirty bundle of black hair in his arms "I got it! It was behind some trash bags"

Both men stared at the strange looking ball of fur, dread setting in their stomachs.

"S-Shimazaki...Buddy... I dont think thats a dog" said Shibata slowly backing away

"What do you mean-" the thing decided that moment to turn its head and reveal its masked eyes.

It was a raccoon.

It bit Shimazakis arm.

"AHHH STUPID SHIT" Shimazaki screamed and quickly trew the damn thing

"AHHHHHHHH" the damn thing, now a blur of claws and fangs, unfortunately landed on Hatoris head.

"Shimazaki help me here-AHHHH" screamed shibata when he tried to rip the beast from Hatoris face

Shimazaki just teleported away.

By the time the raccoon finally jumped and scurried away both Hatori and Shibata were covered in scratches and bleeding from different parts.

"He is gonna pay...Im gonna make him pay" muttered Hatori while cleaning his glasses.

"I think we should go to the hospital first..."

Originally shimazaki was gonna mistake a cat for a dog but a racoon sounded funnier.

Did you know you rarely see stray dogs in Japan because people immediately report them? Or at least thats what my japanese teachers told me.

I know this is like a month later but i had difficulties writing this...ngl the por reception the 3rd part had kinda bummed me BUT i love these guys too much and dont want to stop writing this so im okay now.

Besides in the meantime i wrote for my fics! College funds chapter 2 is up now and so is my newest fic Mother's day! You should check them out. Ive been writing a the good place au for mp100 too but i havent posted it yet.

Anyway! Hope you liked this (Dont listen to them Hatori, your sweater are great)and see you next part because where we will finally reach THE PRANK so be ready for it and some feels

(i was gonna include it in this part but it was already too large and i decided to rearrange some stuff)

Im posting this again because tumblr sucks and posted the first version as a quote that even i cant see

[rogerina-yee-haw]

“at least I’m one”

sd!gwilym lee x reader

chapter 5: “- the anticipated  sweetness”

[the goodbye] [the sadness & tenderness] [the broken rules and true affection] [the pain and eternal bliss]

summary: you and gwil met ten months ago; and he offered you to be his sugar baby almost immediately. you agreed at that exact moment, not knowing where it would get you.

warnings: smut, FLUFF!!, typos, grammar errors (as usual lmao)

a/n: Alice won’t show up in this chapter, sorry. it was too sweet to ruin it with her presence. next chapter is the last one!!!! sorry if this one is too bad!!!!

                                                    September.

“Five hundred pounds?” you sighed as you looked at the price. “Even my life costs less than this!”

This was a chic Versace dress you found at that one posh shop. You didn’t even know how you got there – you were just wandering across the mall; the next thing you knew – you were looking at the pretty but very expensive pieces of fabric.

You could afford this dress only if you worked with no sleep, days off and rest. Shit, you could afford a plain tee-shirt in this shop if you worked yourself to death for six months!

“Guess I’ll die as a poor bitch”, you thought to yourself. You still couldn’t stop looking at this dress; it was everything you ever looked in an evening gown; it was long with a side slit – just to expose your leg a bit; the long sleeves would cover your arms, and the lack of fabric on the back of the dress would give everyone a hell of impression. “It wouldn’t fit me perfectly; must lose weight before even thinking about buying it”.

“I can’t agree with that”.

You flinched at a sudden violation of your thinking process; you already wanted to step away and ignore the man who interrupted your thoughts when you looked at him.

And – oh Lord – he was gorgeous.

Tall, handsome as the Devil himself, in a visibly expensive suit and a smug grin on his face – this man was everything you’ve ever wanted but never had. You opened your mouth, trying to say something, but only gasped – he was too beautiful and rich for you to even try. “Mum was right when she said my shyness will be the death of me”.

“What to be shy about?” he raised his eyebrows; you frowned before you realized.

“Did I just say that out loud?” you quavered; he let out a laugh and looked at you again.

“I’m pretty sure you did; I wouldn’t be speaking to you if I didn’t hear you talking to yourself”.

You covered your face with your hands; you had never felt that ashamed of yourself. You were talking to yourself in a posh shop and this handsome man saw and heard you doing it? “I’m a disaster”, you mumbled. “Sorry you had to witness that”, you said, still covering your face.

“It’s alright. I talk to myself too occasionally”.

You finally were able to raise your head; so you looked at him suspiciously. Really? This fucking Adonis? Talking to himself sometimes? “That is hardly believable”.

“You have quite an opinion of me for the person whom I’ve just met”. Judging by the smile on his face you realized that you – again – expressed your thoughts about him being the Adonis out loud.

You looked down and gripped your hands into you handbag. “I guess being an embarrassment is my life goal”. You couldn’t bear looking at him; finally, you had the chance to hit it off with a handsome dude when you successfully blew it.

Well, you thought you blew it.

“Don’t apologize; it wasn’t embarrassing at all”.

You furrowed your brows and glanced at him. “Really? Not at all?”

He grinned and looked back at you. “Maybe a bit, but it was alright”.

You rolled your eyes at his words; this conversation wasn’t going anywhere further. At least, not with you. That blonde with a short red dress on could certainly get it with this pretty dude. Not you, in your high-waisted jeans and old hoodie with the Avengers logo on it. You didn’t even want to get started on your mum’s sneakers you had been wearing for a couple of years now.

You mum, by the way, always said that your insecurity was keeping you from all the good things in life. And even now, when this mysterious man was certainly interested in you – you didn’t see it. You preferred to drown in your doubt and insecurity. It was easier for you to shield yourself from the world.

“I’m Gwilym, by the way”.

You looked at his hand that he reached out for you; you were attentively examining his palm and fingers. “You know what they say about men with big hands”, Billy’s was echoing in your head, as you subconsciously bit you lip. Gwil suddenly felt really tight in his pants.

“I assume you also have a name”. You were out of your thinking process once again; you looked at him quickly.

“Y/N”, you responded softly as you shook his hand. You felt electricity travelling through your body; your ears were burning suddenly and your palms were sweating. What the fuck was that? “Really nice to meet you”.

He nodded, silently agreeing with you; “You know what they say about men with big hands…”

You rolled your eyes one more time, trying to make this fucker’s voice inside your head shut up. You were so invested in your thoughts that you didn’t even notice how lustfully Gwilym looked at you. He wanted to pull you to the closest dressing room and fuck the hell out of you. You were so incredibly beautiful and hot – and Gwil really had to restrain himself from taking you right then and there. Right in the middle of that shop, maybe.

“Do you mind going to dinner with me tonight?”

His voice wasn’t asking, it was demanding. You suddenly felt weak in your knees under his gaze; you could have melted as the snow under the sun just 'cause this man was looking at you like that. And that reminded you that you hadn’t been with a guy for a while.

“No, I don’t. I don’t mind at all”.

“Good”. He looked as if that was exactly what he expected to hear. “D’you mind giving me your address?”

Oh, you didn’t mind. You also didn’t mind if he would just fuck you in the nearest restroom.

But you were too shy to suggest such the idea.

“Will eight o’clock be alright?”

“Sure”.

You refused when he suggested driving you home; you lied about having to meet your friend so that you wouldn’t spend some alone time with him. “Gwilym”, you thought while waiting for the bus. “Such a pretty name”.

                                     ╰╮✾╭╯✯╰╮✾╭╯

You wake up because you dream is suddenly over – but not like there was anything more of interest during your first date. Just pure primal attraction that ended up with you being fingered by Gwilym in the elevator. It was pretty crazy for you as you have never been a person who would hook up on the first date, but Gwil turned you on so much that you couldn’t handle it. Now you’re happy all of it happened. Now you’re with the man of your dreams.

The sun shines through the curtains of the hotel room window, and you wince because of its brightness. You stretch a bit, trying to wake yourself up, and rub the sleep from your eyes.

“You look like an angel”.

Your gaze falls on Gwil; he leans to the bedroom doorway, a soft smile on his lips. You grin back at him and sit up on the bed, covering your bare chest with the blanket. “You look good too”, you say, observing him. He’s already in a suit, just without a jacket; his hands are in his pockets and he looks so damn hot. “Are you leaving?”

He shakes his head. “Just came back”. Gwil slowly makes his way to the bed and crawls right next to you. “It’s midday already, baby”, he says, reaching to your forehead and kissing it. “We’ve got exactly twenty-four hours before going home”.

“Have you decided what you’re gonna do?” you put your hand on his cheek and he leans into your touch. “That’s a good opportunity, you know”, Gwil chuckles and then sighs deeply.

“A good opportunity but a hard decision to make”, he mutters and kisses you delicately. “I might lose everything if I do it”, his voice is quiet and he looks at you, a glimpse of fear and hopelessness in his eyes. You cup his cheeks and make him look you directly in the eyes.

“Is money worth staying on the job that you hate? Is it worth wasting your time on the place where the boss is a total arsehole to you?” he shakes his head. “Then quit it. Take Ryan and Jack’s offer”.

“I won’t be a vice-president in their company”, he says, “I won’t have this much money if I agree. This is not what you signed-”.

“I don’t care”, you whisper and press your forehead to his. “I’m not with you because you’re rich. Sure, I love expensive gifts”, you both chuckle, “but I can live without them as long as I’m with you. I want you to be happy, Gwil”, you say breathlessly as his hands tighten their grip in your waist, “and I know this new job will make you happy. You won’t hate your boss, at least”, you add and he smiles, leaning closer to you, so that your foreheads are pressed together.

“Bosses, to be correct’, he replies; Gwil leaves a trail of kisses on your jaw. “And I’ve been hating them since we met”, you smile. “Don’t think it’s a good idea to work on my friends who ruined my deal on purpose”.

“Baby, they did it to get you here”, you answer, “to talk to you without your boss interrupting”.

“Yeah, this old bastard left the same day that we arrived on”, he mutters, sucking a hickey into your neck, “doesn’t know shit about his own fucking company”, you let out a gasp, when Gwil’s lips get to that sweet spot, right under your earlobe. You squeeze his shoulders lightly, and the blanket falls from your chest, exposing your breasts. “Acts like he’s the smartest”, Gwil covers your neck with love bites, “when in reality he’s too stupid to even make himself a cup of tea”.

“I guess talking about your boss turns you on”, you swallow hard and Gwilym pulls off of your neck and looks at you in confusion. “You got quite hard while talking about him”, you raise your eyebrow and palm him through his pants. He moans at the sensation of your touch. “Wish I could turn you on so quickly as old Smithers does…” you sigh dramatically and Gwil rolls his eyes, smiling at you.

“You little minx”, his lips are on yours the second he lays you down, flat on the bed, so he’s hovering over you. His covered bulge rubs your thigh and you moan into the kiss, and it gives Gwilym a sign to move further. His left hand trails down your body, paying special attention to your boobs, while the right one is on your face, cupping your cheek. Finally, his fingers rub your clit slowly and you whimper, when he does that. He kisses you fiercely and you try to unbutton his shirt when he puts one finger inside you.

“No”, you pull away, “don’t want your fingers. Want you”.

“Love, we’ve run out of condoms”, he caresses your face. You don’t give him the verbal answer immediately; instead, you unbutton his shirt and help take it off of him, and pull him into a heated kiss. It’s open-mouthed, with moans spilling from both of you, it’s demanding, as your hands wander across his torso, it’s bruising, ‘cause you tug on his bottom lip with your teeth.

“I want you to fuck me raw”, you whisper looking deeply into his eyes.

His eyes are widened the second these words leave your mouth. “You’re not on the pill”, he states as if you didn’t know this. You swallow and kiss him again, less roughly now. 

“Just pull out”, you say, “or is it too hard for you?” your cocky smile makes him go absolutely insane. His eyes sparkle with something you can’t quite read, something that makes you grow even wetter. 

He makes a move closer to your face like he’s going to kiss your lips and when you close your eyes, he suddenly pepper your neck with kisses. He sucks on your collarbone profoundly, leaving marks all over it.

“Mine”, he mumbles, biting on the skin between your breasts softly, “all mine”. 

You mewl in response, tugging on his hair and shutting your eyes in anticipation.

As Gwilym kisses all over your boobs, sucking on your nipples and touching just the way you like it, he notices your closed eyes and messy state; he smirks and moves back to your lips; his kiss is tender but searing. “Want you to look at me”, he rubs your clit slowly, almost lazily, making you squirm and whine. “Want to see your pretty eyes as I fuck you”. 

You help him unbuckle his pants, and when he’s fully naked, in all his glory in front of you, you almost howl. You can’t quite believe you’re going to spend your life with him – and love, joy, lust, and desire overcome you. You sit down on the bed, so that his cock is right in front of your face, and you pump him slowly, maintaining eye contact with Gwil all this time. His dominating side seems to fade away, when you put your mouth on the tip, passing your tongue over the slit. And when you look at him innocently, a grin appears on your face. He looks so fucking hot like this: lips parted, breath hitched, eyes filled with lust, a hand on your cheek. While keeping the eye contact, as you’re following his demand, you take all of him in your mouth. Gwil gasps and his hand is on your head, tugging on your hair slightly. “Fuck, baby, you feel so good”, he gasps, “but…”, your head starts bobbing up and down his cock, and he almost loses it. “Don’t want your mouth”, he pants, trying to catch his breath, “want you”.

You pull him out of your mouth with a loud pop, and he bends down to you, kissing you lusciously. He lifts you up and turns you over without any effort. “On your hands and knees, baby”, you obey happily and wiggle your bum for him. Gwil chuckles and smacks your ass, making you drop your head in between your arms. He lines himself at your entrance and teases you by sliding the tip of his dick up and down your slick folds. “You’re so wet, love”, he mumbles, rubbing your back gently. 

“All for you”, you’re heavy breathing – you need more. And he knows it. So he gives it to you.

Gwil slides into you effortlessly and stills for a moment, giving you time to adjust. When you tell him to move, he does it deliberately and leisurely, making the burning ache between your legs even hotter.

“Gwil, baby”, you turn your head just to look into his eyes, “harder, please”.

He stops moving completely. “You sure?” he always asks. Always keeping you comfortable. 

“Yeah”, you nod. You want to add, “Just destroy my fucking vagina”, but you decide to keep it to yourself. For now, at least. 

He pulls out of you only to slam back with all his length. You scream from pleasure and your legs are already wobbly and you know – a couple of more thrusts like this and you’re a goner. You don’t know where this ability to cum so quickly comes from. Gwil feels you clenching around him, and slows down a bit, silently understanding your desire to last a bit longer. 

“So tight, baby”, he whispers, smacking your butt and then giving your ass cheek a squeeze. He touches your shoulder and makes you get up so that your back is leaning against his chest. Huge mirror right in front of you gives the two of you the perfect opportunity to look, to watch each other in the state of pleasure. 

“Look how pretty you are”, he wraps his hand around your neck lightly, “look at you being wrecked by my cock. So beautiful, baby”. And you’re wrecked – with sweaty skin, messy hair and broken moans coming out of your mouth. 

Gwilym takes his hand off of your neck and puts it on your stomach, helping you move. His other hand massages your boob, making your head fall onto his shoulder. The sounds you’re making are no longer humanlike – but words of love are entangled along with them. You both kept your feelings deep inside for too long for them not to be said to each other almost all the time. 

You are the first to come, and Gwil holds you tightly and fucks you through your orgasm. He’s not far behind you and he comes rather fast, biting on your shoulder and grunting your name. 

You come back from your high and catch a glimpse of you two in the mirror. Gwil's face is buried in your neck, kissing and sucking on it. You intertwine your fingers with his and kiss his palm softly. The hotel room smells like sex, sweat, and love. And you know you’ll enjoy it for the rest of your life.

“I love you so much”, he mumbles while kissing all over your shoulders. You hum in response; when Gwil pulls out, you whine at the feeling of emptiness. He chuckles and walks to the bathroom - he comes back a couple of minutes later, with a wet towel to clean up the mess he’s made on our ass. You smile, feeling his touch; it never ceases to amaze you how much influence he has upon you.

“There you go”, he taps your butt lightly and then wraps his arms around your waist. You lean to him, pressing your back to his chest, and let your head fall onto his shoulder. You’ve never felt more comfortable and safe in your life, ever. It’s like you’re in your personal heaven, and you don’t want to leave his warm embrace.

“That’s funny”, he mumbles.

“What?”

“You tell me to leave the job that I hate, and I obey immediately”, Gwilym kisses the corner of your mouth, making you giggle. “But when I was telling you to quit that pathetic job of yours, you wouldn’t ever listen to me”.

“Well, I quitted it, eventually”, you raise your head and turn slightly to look him in the eyes. Gwil lets out an airy chuckle, through his nose, and shakes his head.

“And I’m really happy about it”, you smile softly.

“Of course you would be. I did it to come to Dublin with you”.

“Sounds like you’re regretting it now”.

You shrug your shoulders. “I could have been brain-fucked be Damian by now instead of just being with you. Dunno what’s better”, Gwil smiles and kisses you tenderly. Your neck gets numb, and you turn your whole body, your chest pressing to Gwil’s. The kiss is needy and sweet, with hands on cheeks, soft laughs and noses rubbing together. Every moment with Gwil is so intimate and soulful that you keep wondering how you could ever live without him. How did it happen that only ten months ago you met the love of your life?

“How is it possible”, Gwil says breathlessly in between kisses, “that I”, you kiss him heatedly again, “even had a life before you?”

You look into his eyes and smile sheepishly. “You’re cute, Gwilym Lee”, you put your hands around his neck. He raises his brows and grins back at you, his hands finding their way around your waist and they rest just above your ass.

“Oh, really?”

“Really”.

He looks at you for a while before speaking again. “Wanna meet my parents tomorrow?”

You nod eagerly. “Will Heather be there?”

Gwil rolls his eyes. “I won’t let my sister steal you from me”.

“Nothing can take me away from you, baby”, you peck his lips, “trust me”.

“Will you wear that dress?”

The look in his eyes is hopeful, he’s almost begging. You chuckle and press yourself even closer to him. “That dress means a lot to me, y’know. We met through it”.

“I remember something like that”.

You sigh and roll your eyes, being suddenly irritated with his remark. “Hope you don’t ruin it by the end of the night”.

Gwil’s eyes sparkle and he licks his lips. “Can’t promise you this, love”, he whispers before kissing you one more time.

________________________________________________________________

I would really love to see some feedback because I feel like this chapter is stupid and useless pls tell me what you think

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[missjackil]

My 14x17 Opinion

Game Night

This was the first new episode since “The Announcement” and I have to say I was putting off writing it. I usually post these the day after, but I procrastinated so it’s a bit late. So forgive my butt-hurt tardiness and let's have at it.

I enjoyed this episode, though it wasn't without some issues. I must say that I was pleased that it wasn't as Sam-lite as I thought it would be from the promo pics, trailer, and knowing Jared didn't work a lot that week, I will always want for more Sam in an episode, but all his parts were necessary and high quality in this one, so I'm not angry at all. 

We start the episode with Donatello making cookies, singing Raindrops are Fallin’ on my Head, which made me smile. It made me think of Butch Cassiday and The Sundance Kid and I love that movie, and if J2 ever want to play the leads in a remake, I would be willing to pay for it myself! 

Donny gets interrupted by the door, and we know this is a problem because its the first 5 minutes of SPN, let's be honest. As soon as I see the bad guy’s wedding ring, I think “Shit... here comes Nick”. I thought he was gonna kill him and I'm glad he didn't. I like Donny, he looks like my dad. 😊

Back at the Bunker, the fam is getting ready for “Winchester Game Night” and Dean is playing Mouse Trap, and having no luck getting it to work. I had that game as a kid too and was never able to get it to work either, but it was fun putting it together! I did think it was a little sad but fitting, that Dean would have played that game as a 4 yr old, but leave it to John and Mary to give Dean a game made for older kids, that never worked out the way it was supposed to and had too many small parts he could choke on. (the irony is not lost on me)

Mary and Jack are in the kitchen. I could literally almost smell the Jiffy Pop popcorn. A Saturday night staple at my house growing up (any of you out there ever taste that greasy salt left on the sides of the foil pan? Good stuff!) and Mary starts in with the questions for Jack. I got a kick out of him telling her its annoying, and her face after. It’s ok Mary, he’s fine, he’s just a teenager now. Something I guess she never got to experience from the adult side. 

Sam is out getting pizza, and all the times they’ve had pizza, I never really saw what Sam likes on his. Apparently both he and Dean like lots of pepperoni. Good choice boys! The joy is short-lived (of course) by Donatello’s call, and Dean and Mary go off to help. I loved Sam sitting there researching. I have always loved his look of interest and concentration during these times. Smart!Sam moment #1 he figures out the language is ancient Hebrew, #2 he has the moment of realization that he knows it’s from the Bible, and knows what chapter and verse. (demerits for the writers though for not knowing Peter is in the New Testament and is in Ancient Greek, not Hebrew, but kudos for Sam/Jared for at least knowing the book is located near the back of The Bible)

Mom and Dean in the car. Now we have the talk about how wrong she knows she’s been but how appreciative she is to have this time with him and Sam. Uhoh... sounds like lines typically given to a character who is soon to be killed off? Hmmm we’ll see. Soon they arrive at Donny’s to find Nick. He says he's poisoned Donny and to save him, they have to help him. He wants to talk. 

Back at the bunker, violent rage!Sam awaits!! GOD that gave me tingles in the best way! I loved Dean leading Nick down the hall in cuffs, in slow motion as if leading him to his execution, and Sam standing there with his chest puffed out like a friggin’ bulldozer, and the snarl and slam attack against the wall!! (hand me that towel, please??) Dean backs Sam off, lots of brother touching going on, but we need intel, we can't kill him yet. 

Now Sam is in self-loathing mode.... he thinks everything is his fault. So many people dying because of him. This is gonna be a big issue soon, I promise. Mom talks Sam off the self-deprecating ledge and tells him he gave Nick another chance because he’s a good man and that's why she’s so proud of him. Sam softens up into the sweetest “aww shucks ma” smile and I want to hug him💕 also, still lines are being spoken by mom that are synonymous with being killed off.

Now, I procrastinated talking about Cas and Anael because the whole thing was boring. I'm not a wife hater but at least make her necessary if you’re going to cast her. I was ok about her role as Sister Jo for Devil’s Bargain but she hasn't been necessary since. Cas wasn't even necessary in this episode. We knew he was hiding the fact that Jack killed the snake, and there are probably 1000 other ways they could have reminded us that the Samulet is still around and maybe they can use it, than for him to find a similar one in the thrift shop or whatever that place was. I dug Methuzula though, he was the oldest dude in the Bible. He wasn’t an angel, for any of you worried about him liking lasagna or why he couldn't just smite Cas... its because he's HUMAN just extremely old. 

On to more interesting things. 

Nick wants to talk to Jack. I was not pleased with Nick referring to Jack as his son. Im not 100% convinced that the writer (and all involved really) remembered that Jack isnt Nick’s son, but added that as a note of empathy Nick has for Lucifer, you’d THINK someone, particularly Jack would say “Im not your son” ?? but anyway, he gives intel to Jack and also gets his blood (dun dun dunnnn) 

Sam is again a smarty pants and knows the antidote for Thalium is Prussian Blue (makes note) and figures he can hack the live feed (brains are so sexy) I also love that Sam’s word is the go word. So many more decisions are made because Sam thinks its the best option than he's ever given for in the fandom. So Sam and Dean take Nick with them to find Donny. 

I really love the broments in this part. Dean tells Nick if he tries anything funny, Sam will shoot him. “And if anything happens to me....” “Sam will shoot me”  “To start!” says Sam... because if he hurts Dean, Sam isnt letting him off that easy. But in true SPN form, as soon as Sam and Dean are separated, shit goes south.

Mom calls Sam and lets him know Donny was shot up with Angel grace, as Jack figured out, Nick was playing them. Now the fight between Sam and Nick ensues! Nick tells Sam why he used Donatello, which was to bring Lucifer back, “You can't, he’s dead he’s in the Empty” Sam says but this show’s self-awareness gets me sometimes lol Nick’s like “Cmon Sam you know no one stays dead anymore” and Sam starts kicking his ass. 

Now, I have already seen a million of you whine and complain that Sam didn’t kill Nick. It’s almost as though some of you have never met Sam Winchester. Of course Sam could have killed Nick, and most of us wish he did, but Sam has stopped himself from killing humans before. He stopped himself with Jake in AHBL and also with Toni in 12x01. Unfortunately it always bites him in the ass. Could it be that Sam thinks if he can kill a human with his bare hands that he’s a monster? This isn’t bad writing folks, this is Sam’s character. 

Nick takes advantage of Sam’s hesitation and starts nailing him with a rock. Spewing crap about Sam being Lucifer’s Perfect vessel and such.... this can only mean that issue will be coming up soon! Sam gets in the car and starts laying on the horn for Dean, calling out to him... Dean hears Sam is in trouble, enough playing around here time to kill some demons. 

When he gets to Sam. he sees he’s badly injured. Sam can hardly hold on to consciousness, protective!dean kicks in! Apply preasure to the blled, call 911, call mom. Now check for brain damage and play a counting game with Sam This hurt my feels so much, it made it feel so much more serious than all the other head injuries he’s sustained. Dean and his caring big brother smile and light hearted speech so Sam doesnt panic just kills me in the best way!! Sam tries to count with him a little and breaks into “You always put me first... your whole life” and manages to muster a little smile. Dean knows Sam believes he’s checking out, and you see the fear all over Dean’s face as Sam fades away. (OMG these 2!! Every freakin time!!)

Meanwhile, Mary and Jack found Nick and he has summoned Lucifer and just about to take him in again (Lucifer looked pretty cool,,, gotta say) and Jack zaps Lucifer back into the rift (no not forever guys... cmon) and starts torturing Nick. Mary kinda flips out telling Jack to stop. He’s contorting his hand, burning him from the inside out... not simply killijng him. Mary is full on worried now. Jack stops and Nick is laying on the floor. Mary is in shock and tells Jack to go help Sam, He heals him and Dean cant even hide his relief as he turns away to catch his breath. 

Now Jack returns to Mary who is more than worried about how Jack was torturing Nick. We know the Winchesters dont mind killing, but draw the line at torture. However, Mary stupidly poked the bear. She could have just kept herself and Jack calm and talked to the boys later, but she poked and poked till Jack freaked out. Though I am wondering if Jack was also hearing Lucifer when he was shouting “Leave me alone!!” But in any regard, he looked at Mary and something happened. Fade to black. 

Aside from the Cas/Anael part, I really enjoyed this episode. A few issues yes, but it hit most of the marks needed for me to enjoy an episode. Ive already rewatched it twice and will again and again. 

On a scale of Bloodlines to Lebanon, I give this a strong 7.5 without the Cas/Anael bit it would have been an easy 8.

[nocvil]

*            ‐            ․            ↺            𝙄𝙉𝙏𝙍𝙊𝘿𝙐𝘾𝙄𝙉𝙂 . . .  ｓｏｏ ｂｏｇｕｍ . hitman        .        caretaker        .        the heel        .        a masked hell        .

❝   my love     ,     my love     ,     my love     ,     won't you stay a while     ?   ❞

possible tw’s below: parental death mention, illness mentions, murder for hire mentions, and uh m,,, i think that’s it rlly. just warning ok.

GENERAL INFO

full name: soo bogum ( 수 보검 ). nickname(s): bo, sweetie pie to his mother (: gender & pronouns: cismale, he/him. sexual & romantic orientation: aromantic, demisexual. age & dob: twenty-five, november 8th, 19-- birthplace/hometown: seoul, sk. parents/siblings: only child, deceased father, living mother. pet(s): absolutely not LOL. astrological sign: scorpio. >:-) dominant hand: both! handwriting style: mostly writes in very slanted cursive. i feel like when you see things like royal documents signed or very important letters written back in the day with that vintage cursive ... that would be bogum. language(s) known/spoken: spanish, english, korean. religion: LOL. ok. current living arrangements: a two-bedroom, two bath apartment complex with his older, npc mother. it is pretty spacious given they both have their own room, a kitchen, dining space, their own bathrooms, and a patio. bo has the money if you kno what i mean ... (: occupation/major: hitman.

PHYSICAL

picture reference: uhh... this? this look rlly gives off bogum vibes so (: blood type: type O. nationality: korean. skin tone/color: lighter tanned. birthmarks & scars: heheh wouldn’t u like to kno ??? height: five-foot ten inches. 5′10″. build: pretty average, more on the lean/athletic side though. hair color: red. hair length: uhm ,, look at reference photo? eye color: brown. diet: uhm ... bo has a pretty average diet probably. he would eat just about anything, not very picky. i think he probably has his favorites when it comes to chips and candy but he doesn’t have a special diet. exercise & level of fitness: LOOOL. let me not make a bad joke here ): how’s their posture ( or lack thereof )?: bogum probably has really good posture! i think standing tall with a straight back probably adds to his uh... authoritative look?  typical style of dress: ( from his stats page ) dresses a bit old school, vintage?, almost plain. likes wearing tucked in and cuffed shirts, rolled up pants, boots, baseball caps, at least three rings on one hand, gold bracelets. the following outfits aren’t specific to him but they are probably kinda similar. it’s hard to rlly find exact examples ): (  1  /  2  /  3  /  4  ) body modifications: none, surprisingly. probably pierced ears that he never puts earrings in. that’s really it though. he would prob like a tattoos but wouldn’t do it for the sake of his career ( because tattoos are distinguishing features ).

MANNERISMS

how does your muse walk?: def with a bit of power in his step. very protective when he is with his mother. mostly, he would walk like he calculates every single step he takes. how does your muse talk?: HAHA i just talked about this with myungok’s mun ,, he would talk very plain and probably without a lot of emotion. this would make things that are usually out of pocket probably sound kinda weird.  what accent/dialect does your muse talk with?: he is from seoul and according to google, they speak with a gyeonggi dialect there (: how would you describe the tone of their voice? are they loud or quiet?: QUIET... shh... if you speak too loud you won’t hear bogum speaking with such monotoned you could probably fall asleep. bogum asmr when?  what does their laugh sound like?: bogum? LAUGHING? i feel like bogum chuckles. so he would have like a short, quiet laugh. how does your muse typically smell?: either like smoke from a cigarette or like his mom’s perfume. what kind of air do they carry?: well jinae’s mun said he would have a dark and heavy presence and honestly that rlly fits the bill. do they have a(ny) catchphrase(s)?: time to die. what are their nervous ticks?: um.. not sure. probably knuckle cracking and finger tapping.

PSYCHOLOGY

what makes your muse happiest?: his mommy! seeing his mom thrive and gain her confidence back, even momentarily, makes him so happy. what upsets them the most?: ugh. listen. i talked abt this with some of y’all but the thought that if he ever got exposed or arrested ... how everyone in his life, including his mother, would just abandon him ... CRIES. was this supposed to be a general question? does your muse have any quirks?: i think his tendency to just be way too lax in certain situations would be his infamous quirk. what are their hobbies? how frequent do/can they do them?: bogum is definitely a simple man. he would totally like puzzles, word searches, watching the news, scrapbooking ( YES, SCRAPBOOKING ), taking walks, shopping with his mom, writing, idk, he doesn’t do anything OD or over the top. shrug. do they have any guilty pleasures?: is your muse an extrovert or an introvert? neither?: 10000% introverted otl. do they have high or low self-esteem? what about confidence?: uhm... bogum probably has an average amount of confidence/self-esteem. he’s a realist, definitely. if he look ugly he look ugly. if he look good he look good. ‘nuff said. are they easily stressed and how do they normally respond to it?: stressed? bogum could be in the midst of a bank robbery and be sitting there like ok, y’all done yet? what is your muses worst fear?: his mother finding out about his job. what is your muses biggest dream?: to either escape his job for good or to be able to heal his mother of all her injuries and illnesses. but of course, neither of those will ever happen! is your muse a morning person or a night dragon?: a night dragon? ok. anyway he is probably both. i can see bogum getting like four hours of sleep and waking up like (: let’s fuckin go! how intelligent is your muse? do they acknowledge it?: OH BOGUM has street smarts but definitely probably not book smarts. at least, not a great amount of book smarts. how can he be a hitman if he’s DUMM?! describe their sense of humor: LMAO. the real question is how can someone as funny as ME play someone as BORING as bogum?

RELATIONSHIP TENDENCIES

are they currently in any sexual or romantic relationships?: HELL NO. luuuul. what is their experience with relationships?: to really think about it, bo probably had feelings for people here and there and most likely dated short term in high school but after he moved and began doing that he kind of lost all his effort to pursue romance. how does your muse view the idea of friends with benefits? have they ever had one? would they ever?: another hell naw to that sis. how important is sex to your muse?: not important at all. bogum could care less. what are their biggest turn on and turn offs?: see above pls. does your muse find it easy to make friends?: i say yes, only because most of his friends are through his mother. how important is friendship to them?: veRY IMPORTANT if bogum didn’t have the friends he has today, he probably would be a lot more sad and maybe more than just a hitman ): quantity or quality of friends?: quality! how important is family?: VERY IMPORTANT AGAIN bogum would give his life for his mother and to have his father back. are they close to their family? why or why not ?: YES. obviously asdfasdf everyone probably knows why. although bogum is now the one who runs the house, he still really values his mother because she ultimately has nobody but him in the end if she gets worse. his parents were always really good to him and when his father died, he knew that he and his mother had to stick together through it. he also knew that that he had to step up to provide for his mother because of her injuries and dementia. she is his life, really.

FAVORITES

activity: haha. you really wanna kno?... he likes word searches a lot. animal: idk. probably like. idk.  beverage: mmmm some piping hot tea. book: - color: is red cliche to say? designer: - food:  flower:  water lilies, pansies, lilies, peonies, idk, he would love all kinds of flowers. gem: i googled these. if he had a favorite it would be garnet, smoked topaz, and morion. holiday: christmas! his mother’s favorite too, probably. mode of transportation: walking, usually. movie: -  musical artist: oh boy, uhm,, i bet bogum likes indie kpop. like dean, suran, hyukoh, but i dont rlly know a lot to give you more details. quote / saying: - scenery: hm. probably night time in the living room, mom is put to bed already, he’s watching a rerun episode of a crime drama on television and thinking about how it’s so unrealistic. he’s got a beer in one hand and a cigarette in the other though he puts it out halfway through because he loses interest. (: scent: i think he’d like the smell of cleaning products, flower scents ( bc it would remind him of his mom ), and metal (: obviously. weather: cloudy or rainy weather. anything that let’s him stay inside for the day. vacation destination: UM. i bet bogum would like to travel out of country to places like europe.

ATTITUDES

greatest dream: to finally have a peaceful life with his mother by his side, healthy or not. he wants to stop being a hitman, really, but it’s kind of like an addiction, plus he’s good at it, and it brings in the bacon. greatest fear: being caught and leaving his mother by herself -- it would be like the ultimate let down since he doesn’t trust anyone with her. most at east when: pls see scenery in section above. least as ease when: out in public by himself. he doesn’t have his mom as his cover. worst possible thing that could happen: PLS SEE GREATEST FEAR. ajdfkjasdfskf biggest achievement: moving to seoul safely with his mom! biggest regret: falling back into the crime life. most embarrassing moment: idk i feel like bogum isn’t embarrassing. he’s too ,, plain. biggest secret: LMAO well ... i think we all know. top priorities: keeping his mom safe, alive, healthy, and her bills paid for. also keeping himself undercover for the most part and making sure neither him or his mother are overwhelmed.

EXTRA TIDBITS

001. bogum is an unhealthy smoker but a social drinker. he never smokes around his mother though.

002. whenever bogum’s mother is around, he is on his own best behavior. he always does his best to be nice and keep up an image of her sweet son although by himself he can be different.

003. so far the only person who knows about his job is sangwoo because he sort of saw him in the act during his first hit. the two joke about it but bogum would take him out in a heartbeat if he spills.

004. i think it’s funny because i always pictured bogum as that person would give the shirt off of his back for you if you were in trouble. but he also wouldn’t hesitate to threaten to make you disappear.

005. his mom doesn’t know how he gets the money to pay for everything but bogum has her believing he “has his ways” and to “just trust him” although she asks about it every now and then.

006. though he stays inside a lot, some of the places you might see bogum outside of his apartment, are grocery stores close to his place, bars around town, museums, little cafes picking up things for his mother, dawon’s flower shop, and very occasionally places where there are a lot of drug activity.

007. here is smth: bogum is a hitman because his father was killed in a hit!

008. despite his mom questioning where he earns his money, his family has always been pretty well off but that was because of his father. so now that his father isn’t alive, it’s kind of ... fishy.

009. lmao probably your very typical scorpio minus the s*xual stuff.

010. my brain stopped working.

AESTHETICS

a card hand full of royals. empty, dark hospital hallways. dirty hands under black leather gloves. an empty, lonely wheelchair. old black and white photographs. an ashtray full of half smoked cigarettes. ripped up diary pages. rolled up fifty dollar bills. two expensive rings on each finger. responding “k” to a paragraph long text message. tri-folded letters written in the upmost calligraphy. roman numeral clocks.

[gotatext]

yo, im not gonna lie guys, im super drunk, so this bio is like.... completely ocpy and pasted but;.... pls plot with me..... im so excited to bring this baby here.... i feel it is the perfect place to write her and i hven’t had the chance to in so long ..... love me..... and greta........ please im so excited this is back, last time i played jack..... n willow??? i think....... maybe archie too...... dont even remember...... who i fuckin played..... but i was here...... and queer..... loud..... and proud..... god this dumb bitch needs to sleep.....

GRETA O'DRISCOLL

20. born in marfa, texas. luvs wearing gingham print dresses and cowboy boots. vert into art and pornography, and particularly the combination of the two. wants to do a PHD on gender studies and female autonomy in porn.

( kristine froseth | she / her | cisfemale ) hey, you hear ( young lady, you’re scaring me by ron gallo ) playing over on the ( rv lot ) ? that’s where ( greta o'driscoll ) lives! i heard they moved in from ( marfa, texas ) exactly ( four months ) ago. they’re very ( zealous ) but also pretty ( erratic ). maybe that’s why davie keeps calling them the ( libertine ). starlit is full of people, but this ( 20 ) year old is really going to liven things up around here! ( nora | 23 | she / her | gmt )

personality: easy-going, deceptive, manipulative, self-reliant, profound, amiable, nihilistic, self-serving, laid back, independent unmotivated, self-corrupting, charming, lazy, impulsive, alluring.

likes: art, music, philosophy, DC comics, arcade games, candyfloss, fish and chips on the beach, deep red lipstick, marijuana, dogs, Kate Moss, late-night strolls, chemistry, suspenders, cigarettes, herbal tea, gallows humour, cold coffee, long showers, brown eyes, tchaikovsky, dr. seuss, DJ sets, magnolias.

dislikes: bananas, coffee, mental mathematics, children, misogyny, the imaginary future, literature, Wes Anderson films

muse tag

pinterest

aesthetics: a bubble of pink gum on chapped lips, mom jeans, a beaten up pair of adidas, strawberry laces, knee-highs, chapped lips, split knuckles, bruises you try to cover with concealer, stick and poke tattoos, sleep caught in your eyes on a lazy afternoon, alien conspiracy theories and sci-fi paperbacks, doc martens with fraying laces, the red string of a thong peaking out purposely from jeans, a rucksack permanently packed for the move, a streak of red across your lips, roller blades, cut knees, not eating your greens, smiling with a mouthful of blood, feet pounding the earth until your soles bleed crimson, sleeping in a cherry lip balm and scrunchies to keep the wild locks from your eyes.

cliffsnotes on biography

 - she’s called greta (under witness protection), and she’s a serial dater. she’s incredibly restless and doesn’t settle. before she came to seattle, she’d lived in 8 different cities in 3 years. born into a single-parent house with two older sisters so always surrounded by women and as a teenager she often let boys walk all over her bc she just craved male attention  -   every place she goes, she becomes a new character, someone who’s a figment of her imagination, as if each city is repertory theatre and she’s a character actress, so as a result everyone from her past views her as a completely different person depending on when she met them.   -   she’s been involved in a series of destructive relationships because when people discover she’s not who she pretends to be she often gets explosive and defensive.  -   (tw gun) she’s now under witness protection and moved to connecticut because she shot a previous boyfriend in self-defence and his family are trying to have her done for murder, but she got tired of being moitored so is now even on the run from the police / her faked identity.  - easy to get along with (provided you don’t anger, provoke or question her too much) because she WANTS your character to be entralled by her and will do whatever it takes to win them over. she wants everyone to love her   -  big into sports. big into gender politics. big into art. does a lot of art installation pieces to do with female and queer bodies. massive feminist. low key quite scared of powerful men bcos of her ex. wants to start a female only lesbian commune. big fan of the honey bee.

full biography

trigger warnings: drugs, domestic abuse, gun.

you never meant for it to happen. you’d heard the stories, of girls who let their man walk all over them, and thought to yourself “i’ll never be one of those girls…” the kind that eat low-fat yoghurt and drink slim fast to shred a few extra pounds because he said she was getting round in the tummy, or the ones who spent their evenings tied to a kitchen sink drinking wine while him and the boys played poker, wishing god, if only I could get out of here. not you, not you raised by strong women, four bright shining beacons. single mother with her hard-as-nails attitude and her stony glares, elder sisters (twins) one ginger, one blonde, one doctor, one lawyer, both determined to take a bullet to the brain and a hammer to the patriarchy before they let a man touch them without asking. you were always so inferior, so insecure and small, like a bird (like a sparrow) with blonde plaits down your back sucking tropicana whilst your bosom buds sucked dick, their lips permanently ripe with stories of their sexual exploits, fake tan and glittered nails whilst you sat in the unbroken egg of virginity wondering what it was like to be loved. one day you found out. 

lily milligan’s parents gone and a free house for the night, bottles of ouzo and tequila swiped from your mother’s liquor cabinet thinking she wouldn’t know (she always knew) your legs, hardened from pep squad, slut dropping on a kitchen table because the boys thought it would be fun to get the quiet girl drunk. you’d never had a sip before that night. band t-shirts, denim shorts and the split soles of rotten converse that you refuse to let go of, you still clutched with both hands to your youth, but in a tube top now (borrowed from alice carmichael who had a sister in college) and a short tennis skirt, your feet not in trainers but in thigh-high boots. uncomfy as hell but lily said you needed to look sexy. you didn’t know if you wanted to be sexy. you didn’t know what kind of girl you were, if you were even a girl at all. but robbie looked at you like he knew exactly who you were, like he knew you better than you knew yourself, and his lips had the pink cupid’s bow of a movie star, and his hair was dark locks, curling like a mane. his hands were soft, and suddenly on your waist, and after three more shots his lips were on yours and his name was the only sound in your head and on your lips as you lost it in lily’s college sister’s bedroom beneath the glare of a T-Pain poster. you bled for what seemed like hours, his hand still in yours, kissing on the sofa as truth tellers and daredevils continued to spin a bottle of unprecedented youth. you thought it was love. robbie was the one. he loved you, you knew it, how else could someone be so soft? but soon he grew bored, scrunched up your paper heart and set it alight. then came the tears, the hatred, the ‘fuck robbie, in fact, fuck all boys.’ and that you did.

you were known for being easy. any boy could be yours for a night, as long as he promised to love you for those few short breaths and pants before you cried yourself to sleep. you felt poisoned, but poisonous as well, as if by ensnaring these young boys you were gaining power over them, and not the other way around. soon it started to work. they’d want more, but you’d deny them it, sick of sucking off silly schoolboys, they’d call you a tease, a vixen. maybe you were, but you couldn’t help but want older men. you got the history teacher first time, him bending you over his desk to sneak a hand up your tennis skirt as the after-school clubs carried on next door, unawares. love didn’t exist, not for you. it was nothing but a game for pretty young girls to play, bubble gum in their canines and a hand tugging at the hem of their cheer skirt.

there was so much anger inside of your small body, ‘beware of boys and their hook-like words’. hockey helped. there was something formidable about the feeling of a stick like a weapon in your hands and the thwack it made against thighs in the heat of a scrum - “slipped, sorry!” - you’d utter with a snakeskin smile, millicent quinn knowing that you’d hit her on purpose because she shagged robbie at that party last week. she couldn’t prove it, cobbled acne on her forehead turning green with disgust. ben came into your life like a car crash. two years your senior, with a baseball jacket and shoulders like a god. he became your personal hero. on the pitch, he was lethal. together, you could bring anyone to their ruin. each day after last period he’d be waiting in his car. you’d leap into his arms like a girl-half starved, love me, love me, love me, your heated kisses the envy of every junior girl. he was yours for three blissful years, utterly yours, and you were his, his star-spangled girl, and he was your knight - you were both the same, playing games, always difficult to predict. it was a shock to all when he proposed, high-school sweethearts find love in south dakota.

the engagement was a bittersweet affair; three months – you barely out of your gingham print skirts and into a graduation gown, him, a surly quarterback towering above your sisters, cigarette at his lips and a scowl like a fart in a lift. they hated him. so did you. but you were eighteen and in love, and he fitted the cookie cutter mould. everyone wanted him, and you had him. you had him and you were happy, happy, happy, and he loved you. he said he’d give you the world, anything you wanted hand-picked and given to you. instead, he gave you a jack russell terrier and a flat you couldn’t swing a cat in, wallpaper peeling like the rotten bits inside of you, the bits that only he knew. and you got tireder and tireder of the sad excuse of a life he’d picked out for you, him out doing god knows what to pay the bills, and you dancing on tables to pave your way to stardom, and this was love, this was real, until the shine wore off and your fresh-faced, dimple-cheeked cheerleader facade faded and the ugliness started to reveal itself, the whining, the petulance, the sharp-tempered cruelty, the mind games, the need to always win, win, win. he was dull, he was boring, he was nothing like the boy the girls had said he was and no chiselled six-pack could hide his lack of anything remotely interesting, your patience wearing thin until it snapped like rubber, a rucksack on your back, running shoes on your feet and the joint bank account emptied into your eighth grade birthday wallet.

you built your small fortunes working the casinos of sioux falls, a crimson dress and an attitude to match. bookish archie with his little dipper freckles was fun for a month before he became just as dull and dreary as the rest. a three-hour bus and you were in minneapolis, bright eyed and bushy tailed, fresh meat ready for the pickings. a hostel here, a friendly co-worker’s sofa there as you made what you could by taking off your clothes and shaking your ass like you were back in pep squad, doing what you did best. you met your fair share of creeps, and soon it was back on the road to escape a wide-eyed stalker and a restless itch for more. milwaukee, chicago, you made the roads your own. log cabins and lodgings, and the occasional motel, a beaten up pick up truck purchased at a scrap merchants – you got a few miles out of it before it bit the dust, and when you finally set it alight after nights spent lounging across the driver’s seat, a parka tucked over you as a duvet, you were sad to see it go. you’re nomadic by fault, never attaching to place, people or things, creating a new personality in every place you go like a character actress; each town is a different repertory theatre, and you’re the star. a compulsive liar, you even fib about your own name, to some you’re ellen, nineteen, bookish, a law student who likes smoking and cosmos. to someone else you’re rita, you’re twenty-five and look young for your age, like smoking, comics and fucking in public places.

in the bright lights of michigan, you found charlie, sweet charlie, too good for you, though you let him spoil you while he thought you were the small town girl of his dreams. next came abigail, who was fun until the jealously kicked in, and then luke, gorgeous luke, dangerous, exciting, who despite his temper, despite the fights, despite bruises down your spine and your teeth marks on his arms, loved you with the strength of a wildfire. there was destruction in your wishbones, a savageness from the field, from the pitch and now somehow in his arms, you were godly. he was cruel, he was careless, and he refused to fall at your feet like so many other boys had, which only you made you want him all the more. you were rage incarnate. you hated him so fiercely you thought you might kill him, so he played the only card you wouldn’t predict; proposed.

the house you shared was a backstreet flat in detroit, you make your name as a downtown singer while he foots the bill with pills. they have a drug for anything these days, to dull the senses, to pick them up, to drive you to insanity or pull you out of the madness hole. the two of you live like criminals on the run (you never told him that you were, living out your days as the enigma he wanted you to be), you with your voice like caramel and fishnet legs. you were his and his alone until his hand was at your throat and the gun was in your hands screaming at him to stop, stop, stop, until a bullet stoppered his brain, crimson staining linoleum as you cast yourself out like lucifer. self-defence was decreed the moment they saw your violet neck, black tears and headlight eyes and mind screaming red, red, red like the pom-poms you shook so willingly in school and the insides of his skull. you were gone, and “you” was born, renamed “greta”, boxed, shipped-out, and next-day delivered to vegas where under witness protection you were a student, blank slate, fresh-faced in a place where no one knew your name, doing what you always did and starting again.

[moonliney]

Dancing with You

3.5K of pure love!!

Genre: Fluffier this time around though still angst, Idol!AU

Summary: Yunhee has been BTS’s best friend since they debuted in 2013. 3 years later and stronger friendships than ever, she debuted with her own group as well and is now battling the stress of work, life, and her so called feelings for her best friend Jung Hoseok, also known as BTS very own J-hope. Let’s also mention that she is super naive and does not understand what the fu** love is until a certain girl from J-hope's past comes back.

Inspired by BTS “ Trivia: Just Dance” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IiW1kEJDBDQ

Please read Pt.1 first to better understand 

https://moonliney.tumblr.com/post/618538982320553984/i-really-dont-like-her

Month December, Year 2016 ~ 

There are many moments in a person’s life when they want to crawl in a hole and welt away like a flower on a hot sunny day. It could be due to anything that triggers it: sadness, anger, isolation, and in Yunhee’s case right now, complete embarrassment. Now she has definitely been embarrassed many times before like that one incident where she cried on a national variety show due to having ridden the scariest biggest roller coaster she’s ever seen in her life or that other time when she was performing and forgot it was her part until her members nudged her. Oh and let’s not forget that far memory she pushed in the back of her head when she was changing and poor Jungkook walked in forgetting to knock. 

Yeah, those were horrible moments that could make any girl cringe and blush tomato red thinking about it. But this time, having her best friend and his ex-girlfriend hearing the song written about them, about the sad emotions she has for him and the raw negativity she has for the other girl, the feelings she has been hiding for so long now heard by them, will undoubtedly top all of that by a landslide. 

“ Hope, why didn’t you knock?” A blunt Suga said breaking the silence in the room, ignoring a standing Nari in the back. He didn’t want to be mean, but he was quite defensive of Yunhee now after seeing her cry a couple of minutes ago plus he was a little irritated at the intrusion of someone new coming into his genius lab. 

“ Sorry, I did knock but you both had your headphones in when recording. I was worried something happened so I just used the passcode myself…. This is Nari by the way.” J-hope tilted his head towards her not realizing the other two had already figured out who she was. 

“ Hi, it’s nice to see you again Yoongi Oppa,” Nari smiled lightly. “ And you must be Yunhee shi.”

 Yunhee and Suga both timidly mumbled “hi” as they glanced at each other waiting for the next person’s move. Cold silence now engulfed the small studio once again. If there was a picture to describe pure awkwardness, it would be taken at this exact moment right now. 

J-hope with a raised eyebrow looked at the two short people who were purposely avoiding eye contact with him, one was due to shyness and the other was an annoyance. “ I didn’t know you were working on a song Yunhee, it sounded really good. Why didn’t you tell me?” 

“ You’ve been busy...” Replied the girl now trying to focus on her shoelaces so she wouldn’t have to look at Nari and compare everything she has to her. Little did she know, her few words caused a stir of hurt in J-hope and a bit of jealousy for not asking his help instead. 

Suga glanced around carefully pausing to see people’s reactions when he suddenly dinged up a great plan. Yunhee has always been confident in her dancing, he thought. So what’s a better time for her to get rid of her insecurities about Nari than dancing and proving to everyone that she owned the dance floor just as much as Nari did and in a way gain her confidence back enough to confess to Hoseok. You’re a complete genius, Suga praised himself smirking, complete genius. 

“ Hey hope I heard you two were practicing some dance moves earlier, why don’t you show us?” Suga suggested ignoring the youngest’s eyes bulging in shock. 

Later at the Practice Room ~ 

“ Oppa!” Yunhee whispered loudly to Suga as she pinched his arm, “ Why did you suggest this? I don’t want to see them dance together!”

 “ Don’t worry, this is your time to shine.” He mischievously grinned at the pouting girl, “ Get out there and take your man back.” 

Some of the other members have also gathered around the practice room wanting to see what their new choreography was going to look like. J-hope and Nari now in front of the mirror dancing rigidly along to the beat, sweat dripping down their foreheads. 

“They look so good together...but I have to say the transition of the movements onto the second verse seems too rough for me,” Yunhee said quietly to the other members, her analytical dancing side appearing as she calculated their steps. Her thoughts were unexpectedly interrupted when someone from behind pushed her in the center where J-hope and Nari stopped seeing the younger one’s panicked interruption. 

“ Yunhee, do you have something you want to add on?” J-hope smiled, anticipating the girl’s meticulous dancing ideas. 

She hesitated, wondering if it was right for her to say her input when the other two had already finished the dance. He really needs to change the transition though and there are some other movements that need adjustment if BTS wanted to pull off this performance neatly, she thought, shaking her head. Aish, put your pitifulness aside Yunhee ah, this is for them. All of those times they trained and helped you become the idol you are today, don’t be embarrassed and try to help them. Stop shying away because you’re scared of speaking your mind. It’s okay, you got this. Yunhee repeated in her head trying to gain a sense of self during this uncomfortable state. 

With hand clenching fists and a new sense of purpose, she looked up as confidence now shines through moving towards the center to show some of her own movements, feet, and arms moving in perfect calculation.

 “ I think it would be better if you do it like this...see, one, two, three, one two three, repeat…yeah, let’s try that again…good...again.” 

Everyone, even Nari, had gathered around to copy Yunhee’s movements and watch the talented dancer. Needless to say, the room was wonderfully impressed with how quickly she was able to adjust and memorize the dances to teach them. As the chorus hits, J-hope moved alongside Yunhee dancing together in perfect synchronization. 

From the other's perspective, it looked like two lovers having the happiest time of their lives, the way their movements followed one another as if it was fate itself tangling the two together and never letting go. 

In Yunhee’s mind, she had let go of her doubts now solely focusing on her passion for dancing, not caring about the man next to her who was observing her thoroughly. She let her heart take her every step of the way and it was obvious through her dancing as well when people saw how much she loved it. 

J-hope didn’t know why but every time they danced together, his heart always swelled up more than he wanted to. He always shrugged it off as a proud moment of a best friend watching her perform so well, but other times, after their dancing sessions were over, he would think about her a lot late at night and wished she was lying with him just as she used to before schedule started filling up their lives. 

As the song comes to an end with a booming drop, Yunhee and J-hope faced one another with only their heavy panting filling the room, the two’s closeness evident by every breath one exhaled the other breathed in. The members and Nari had already stopped halfway through the song but they didn’t notice, too locked up in the music and each other to see the world around them. 

A low whistle broke the tension as everyone turned to look at a puckered lip V.  “ Nari says she has to go home.” The latter headed out nervously giving everyone a sincere apologetic smile knowing she ruined the sensual atmosphere with her departure. 

 J-hope sighed as he regrettably stepped away from Yunhee to follow Nari out the door stopping to look back at Yunhee one more time who seemed to have, dare he say, longing in her eyes as she watched him pick Nari once again. 

Afterward, in the Car ~ 

Nari looked out the car window as Seoul’s vibrant energy and Christmas lights tingle up the prettiest city in the world. However, she was too entranced in her thoughts of the previous encounter to give the city its notice. 

“ Yunhee is really talented in dancing, no wonder she won first place in her dance competitions.” She spoke up softly. 

J-hope smiled proudly at the name, a name that means lotus flower and pleasure, all too fitting for the girl itself. “ She is, isn’t she? She worked so hard all these years...now she’s made it.” 

“ She’s beautiful too,” Nari turned her head now to look at J-hope’s reaction, “ I don’t think she likes me though.” 

“ She’s...shy at times. It’s hard to explain when it comes to her, she can be unpredictable, keeps you on your toes a lot.” He smirked. 

“... She’s predictable in the way she looks at you though like you’re her whole world, Hoseok.” 

“ Nari,” J-hope stopped the car at her apartment, frowning as he disbelieves what he’s hearing. “ She’s been upset at me for a while now, ever since I scolded her about you. Besides, she’s kind like that to everyone, she is enduring to V and Suga as well.” 

“ She’s hurt and hurt can turn into upsetness if left alone. You’re avoiding your feelings for her because you don’t want it to ruin your friendship or her career as it just started. That’s why you have been spending time with me a lot right? Because you know there’s something there between you two, heck everybody in the practice room knows there’s something unspoken there...except for the two of you. So you’ve been spending more time with me to discourage her.” 

Nari edged on even more as she knows she was getting to J-hope with his brown orbs softening to show his true feelings. 

“ Hey,” He chuckled, “ I like talking to you too, it’s nice to know what normal people are doing these days. Can’t believe your boyfriend proposed, by the way, congrats.”

“ Haha, thanks, who knew after breaking up with you I would find the love of my life.” She winked at him amused at his exaggerated hurt face. “ It’s okay to tell her about your feelings, really, you two don’t have to date but at least confess to her. From one girl’s mind to another, I know she’s hurting a lot when she saw you with me.” She sighed, looking at his face filled with regrets. “Hoseok, you shouldn’t hurt people you care about...Talk to her, she’ll take care of you more than I ever did.” 

J-hope pondered a bit, sulking at the pain he has caused his girl before coming to a decision, one he hoped would be the best for both of them. “Thanks, Nari, I owe you one.” 

“ No problem. Think of it as an apology for breaking your heart- “ Ya!” “ and a thank you for letting me borrow some money - which I might or might not give back.” “ YAAA!” 

A Couple of Days Later ~ 

Yunhee smoothed out her sparkly red dress, staring at the sultry girl in front of her. Her own reflection looks back as it takes notice of her glossy lips and simple yet magnetic makeup. In two days, it would have been Christmas Eve and BangPD thought it would be a good idea to have a small company party today. Of course, it had to be a bit of a formal occasion as the company’s popularity was rising so a little dressing up was needed at this time, hence why Yunhee had gotten so dolled up in this first place. 

Is he going to be here? She thought, her heels clicked and clacked as the girl made her way to the top floor of the company’s building. They have not thoroughly spoken since that day in the practice room since schedules were overpacked now especially during the holiday season, only small good morning and night texts were exchanged before life hurriedly took over. 

She didn’t know if he was going to attend considering it was not mandatory though expected of BigHit’s artists to come. However, when she asked him, he seemed to brush it off and switched to other topics or said goodnight as his reply which frustrated her like no other. Maybe it was good he didn’t come? Considering he would be in a suit and that would have been devastating on her pure heart and mind as adult thoughts seeped in. 

Blasting music can be heard around the corner as Yunhee walked in excitedly, adrenaline pumped from the moving bodies and familiar faces. Loud gasps can be heard from different parts of the room as the girl although known for being bubbly and sweet, radiated a completely different person tonight with sensualness and elegance edging through every smiling expression and waving movement she gave to people. 

“ Excuse me miss, have you seen my little sister? She’s supposed to be here tonight.” A worldwide handsome Jin appeared teasing at the blushing Yunhee now. 

“ Oppa, you look so handsome tonight.” Yunhee smiled adding on to his cockiness, “ Have you seen Hoseok Oppa though? He never told me if he was going to come.” 

Jin smirked with a playful glint in his eyes, head nudging at the auburn-haired man who appeared behind them. The girl spun around to see what he was looking out and to say the breath knocked out of her was an understatement. J-hope with his ruffled auburn hair, mesmerizing eyes, fine face structure, and lean body that complemented his surreal black suit so well was astonishingly dashing.  He was complete beauty and as he walked towards her, she could have sworn time had stopped to aid fate at this moment. No longer were people’s laughs and voices evident, instead only slow swaying music was heard now as J-hope grabbed Yunhee’s soft hand. 

“ May I have this dance?” 

She nodded slowly walking with him towards the center where he paused putting one hand on her waist, a shiver running down her body. “ You look like such a lady tonight,” J-hope spoke, leaning close to the amusedly glaring young girl . 

“ I am a lady. In fact, I think many men in this room would think so as well.” “ Hmmm, they might but this lady is already dancing with a gentleman.” 

“ Shouldn’t this gentleman be with someone else right now?” Yunhee now getting further upset at his openness when he had evidently left her for Nari last time. J-hope however, pushed her closer to his body missing her sweet warmth these days. 

“ I very much prefer dancing with you instead,” J-hope grinned as their bodies swayed nicely against one another. “ Besides, Nari is at her boyfriend’s house, they seem to be having a great time celebrating the engagement.” 

“ Boyfriend? Engagement? How come you never told me?!” 

“ You never asked- woah! ” J-hope was suddenly pushed back by the young girl walking her way out of the room, him quickly following her to the cold rooftop. 

“ Yunhee! Yunhee, come back I’m sorry.” J-hope grabbed the small girl’s wrists pulling her into his embrace. “ I’m sorry, I’m so sorry for hurting you.” His sadness deepened when she started to tremble with hot tears soaking his shirt. 

“ Why did you push me away then?” She hiccuped trying to control herself. “ You were always texting her and talked about her and y-you yelled at me. I-i thought you no longer cared.” 

“ No, no I’m sorry angel, I’m genuinely sorry.” He cupped her chin wiping away the fallen tears, his heart shattering at everyone. “ I was tired that day but to be honest, I was upset at you thinking Nari was a bad person. She’s actually really nice. In fact, she encouraged me to ask you to dance today.” 

Yunhee peered up, shocked and guilty at the fact she let her immaturity judge another person. “ Really? Oh no, I have to apologize to her. I wasn’t thinking well, I was just…” 

“ Jealous?” Smiling at the girl’s flustered expression, he rested his forehead on hers. The two gazed into each other’s eyes enchanted from one another. “You have nothing to be jealous about, moonlight.” 

“ Then why did you keep talking to her?” “ It was just catching up with an old friend I promise...and I know about your feelings towards me...hey it’s okay, I didn’t say I didn’t like it.” 

“ H- how did you know?” “ Yunhee ah, I’ve known you for 3 years already, most of my free time consists of you and the members. You think I wouldn’t notice your small glances turning into something else?...I didn’t tell you though. Instead I tried to ignore both our feelings as your career just kicked off and you have so much to show the world. But that was wrong of me and I understand I hurt you instead.” 

Yunhee embraced him tightly, listening to his fast heartbeat syncing along with hers. Similar to the way their bodies danced together, their hearts did as well.  “ You really made me be in pain...I even wrote a song about it.” 

Chucking, he pressed a light kiss on her forehead gazing down at her once more. Their eyes met again as countless stories could have been told of this moment between a man and a woman who knew each other's body, heart and soul so well with the way their chemistry overflowed in and out the starry night sky. 

“ Guess I have to write a song about you now.” “What? No no you don’t have to I-” 

“ I will because... lately I can sense your confidence has been going down and I think I need to see my outgoing and cute Yunhee again even though tonight proved to me you can be very different from cute.” He smirked, kissing her flustered forehead again. “ Hoseok oppa…”

J-hope hugged her tighter whispering words of endearment in her ears as the couple sealed their fate that very night, embracing each other lovingly.        

“ You’re always going to my favorite girl. My one and only girl, don't ever forget that. ” 

Month August, Year 2018 ~ 

“ Good morning, everyone! This is announcer Shin A-young reporting to you on August 24 about BTS’s new world trending album, Love Yourself: Answer. This is the second compilation album of BTS with the first being Love Yourself: Her. Already breaking chart records with numerous support from both South Korea and International fans, this will surely be another amazing album from them with the majority of the members producing their own songs as well. Let’s have a look, shall we?” 

Our heartbeats are in sync

You’re getting to know my heart too

I wanna keep this going

I like you like I like to dance

So you’re my love, yeah my love

That’s what I like

I like the feeling of being with you

I like the feeling of dancing with you

I just wanna, wanna, wanna

I really wanna, wanna, wanna

Just dance

To the rhythm of the music

However our bodies move

We’re shadows underneath the moonlight

Fall in.. fall in..

I felt it baby

This moment, you and me, baby

This all fits together like a math formula baby

Even rough breathing, baby

Even shedding sweat, baby

Because of you, it all has meaning, baby

Eii! I’m melting in fluff guys <3 Thanks for reading again, it really means a lot to me. However! The story is just beginning hehe I am thinking of doing a compilation of Yunhee and J-Hope’s moments along the years or the first time they met which I can promise is sweeter than a sugary cupcake oooorr I can even start on the other boys, we’ll see ;) . Lastly I hope everyone is safe right now, we will get through this together 💜

[barblebapkins]

99 to 1 boi les'go

okay FINE ILL DO IT BACKWARDS99: Do you miss anyone right now? miss anyone in particular?? no, but i do wish i was with someone rn98: Whats your favorite color? green97: Do you want kids? idk? maybe?96: Do you have kids? no95: Do you cry and throw a fit until you get your own way? no?? like who over the age of 6 does that94: Who was your HS crush? haha that stays in the vault!93: If married, how long have you been married? not married! yet!92: Do you want to get married? yes hehehahehehea91: Best room for a fireplace? the living room of course90: Can you knit or crochet? nope!89: Which are better black or green olives? i dont like olives in general88: Ever have plastic surgery? nope and doubt i ever will87: Ever won a contest? nothing worth remembering86: DJ or band, at a wedding? probably DJ85: Are you patient? depends, with people i think i have a lot of patience, but with other things i can lose my temper kinda quickly84: Can you hold your breath without holding your nose? nope, i panic83: Can you swim well? not well at all82: Sugar or snickerdoodles? sugar81: Tea or coffee? tea80: Hot tea or cold tea? i prefer cold tea, though i havent tried much hot tea. i feel like i’d prefer hot honestly79: What was the last concert you saw? none! that aint my style78: Who would you like to see in concert? see above77: Ever been in love? yes! i am right now!76: Regularly burn incense? nope75: Own a record player? im not THAT old74: Own any record albums? NOT THAT OLD!!73: Have you ever cried because you were so happy? yes heaehe72: Ever won a spelling bee? no, i probably could have though71: Can you curl your tongue? yea70: Is there a profession you picture your future spouse doing? dhedhehde shes currently in graphic design but she can do whatever she wants!69: Ever take dance lessons? nope! i cant dance to save my life and im fine with that!68: Ever hear of the group Tres Bien? no?? i feel like someone else put this here67: Peanuts or Sunflower seeds? not a fan of either but probably sunflower seeds if i had to pick, cos i HATE peanuts66: Cheetos Or Fritos? cheetos without a doubt65: Nike or Adidas? nike64: Wal-Mart, Target or Kmart? target. walmart is always a disaster every time i’m there, and kmart, while a nostalgic liminal space, is an awful shopping experience too63: First concert? already answered this twice haha62: What do you wear to bed? t-shirt and shorts, or just shorts, depending on how cold/hot it is61: Wear a bath robe? nope, i just wear my towel until im ready to get dressed60: Wear slippers? i own a pair but i dont really use em59: Take a vitamin daily? no but i wish i did58: Ever have a Deja-vu feeling? all the time, like something specific will happen irl and ill feel like i envisioned this exact moment YEARS ago57: Do you believe in ghosts? yeah, i’ve had more than one weird experience that i cant explain any other way56: Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid? i kinda wanted to be a chef until i realized i cant cook for SHIT55: Favorite type of fruit pie? probably cherry54: Ever eat a pierogi? yes and it WASNT GOOD53: Is Christmas stressful? now that i actually buy stuff for everyone yes it is52: Do you think musicals are cheesy? not really, i still have a bit of a soft spot for les mis51: Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer? in school probably50: Ever used a gun? yes, and i didn’t like it.49: Do you dance in the car? i am the most introverted person in the world, you’re lucky if you can even get me INTO a car48: Do you sing in the shower? no but i hum sometimes47: Do you sing in the car? nope46: Are you afraid of heights? deathly yes. if i even look UP at like a skyscraper i get nauseous45: Ever watch soap operas? not willingly44: Who is better…Leno or Letterman? i dont really watch late night stuff but ive heard letterman is a bit of a dick43: Are you stubborn? i can be with some things42: Which are better legos or lincoln logs? what the FUCK is a lincoln log41: Do you have any magazine subscriptions? my brother keeps renewing my gamestop subscription so i keep getting gameinformer magazines and i want it to STOP40: Are you horny? no39: What is your Chinese astrological sign? dog bork bork38: When you were a kid, what did you dress up as for Halloween? i honestly dont remember?? like i think back on it but cant visualize any of it37: Are you lazy? haha YES36: What is your usual bedtime? whenever i WANT it to be leave me alone35: Best thing to eat for breakfast? sadness34: Favorite kind of sandwich? i rly like cold italian subs33: Ever ran out of gas? i dont rly drive so no32: Ever gotten a speeding ticket? see ^31: Can you change the oil on a car? no lmao30: When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper? youre livin in the past grandpa, these days we project our brainwaves directly into other peoples heads from across the globe!29: Would you ever strip or pose nude in a magazine? AAHH what the fuck no28: Were you ever a boy/girl scout? for a little while but circumstances made me have to leave27: Last person you kissed/kissed you? haha hasnt happened!26: What movies could you watch over and over and still love? my favorite movie ever is probably Up25: What is your favorite food? grilled shrimp pls GIVE24: What do you dip a chicken nugget in? bbq sauce mm23: If you’re a girl, bra size? If you’re a guy, pants size? 30 x 2922: Where would you bury hidden treasure if you had some? haha nice TRY pirates21: Whats your least favorite movie? cant think of any off the top of my head but im sure ill think of one later20: Do you still watch cartoons? i admittedly still keep up to date on steven universe and cant wait for the next episodes19: Is it okay for guys to wear pink? of course!18: What is your Song of the week? sweats17: What size is your bed? i dont know and im too lazy to check, but its TOO SMALL16: How many people have you slept with this week? none, and i wouldnt ever just sleep with someone but thanks for asking i guess!!15: Do you chew your pens and pencils? yes if im nervous14: Do you ever dance even if theres no music playing? i dont dance13: What about pooped in the woods? ew WHAT12: Have you ever peed in the woods? only cos we were camping and it was like 2 am11: Do you ever count your steps when you walk? sometimes actually yeah, not for any good reason though10: What is your biggest pet peeve? nothing gets on my nerves more than dishonesty and/or uncalled for disrespect9: Do you always smile for pictures? no cos i have a BAD smile8: Do you have freckles? no but i have a lot of birthmarks7: Would you rather be attacked by a big bear or a swarm of a bees? you cant outrun a swarm of bees6: Do you cut out coupons but then never use them? no wtf how old do these people think we are5: Do you like to use post-it notes? this is the FUTURE, DUDE!!4: Have you ever stolen a street sign before? what the fuck who does that3: Do you sleep with your sheets tucked in or out? out, but not usually on purpose cos my sheets are very loose2: Do you take the shampoos and conditioner bottles from hotel? no1: Do you sleep with your closet doors open or closed? i dont have closets only dressers, soo

[ninarequests]

Addiction

Hey guys so this is part 1! I promise ill update more. I’m leaving for Korea in the morning so bare with me. Thanks so much for the support but once i come back i’ll update again

Pairing:Kihyun/Reader

Genre: Slight angst, Dom!Kihyun Sub!Kihyun, Smut (a good amount of it), romance.

       Kihyun laid on his bed thinking about what had just happened in his kitchen. This always happened to him, everytime you would come over or when he was at your apartment it always ended with him having the most amazing sex with you. He would lay in his bed and think about you, about how your hands felt as they left scratch marks on his back or how they felt wrapped around his throbbing cock. To say he loved it was an understatment to say the least. He was despreate for your touch but he was also desperate for your presence. Kihyun thought about how you both met and couldn't help but smile.

-10 years ago-

“y/n! Come say hello to my friends.” Rolling your eyes you rolled off the bed. You hated when your mom made you go and say hello to her friends. They always said the same thing “Aw your so cute!” “You look just like your mother.” Or your favorite “You must have all the boys in your class head over heels for you.” It was annoying and a little off putting. You really could care less about the boys in your class or even in your school. They were all gross to you.

 Walking downstairs you saw your mom talking to a woman that looked around her age. “Oh y/n, good you're here this is my old roommate from college.” You looked at her friend and smiled, she smiled back at you and shook your hand.

“It's nice to meet you.” she pulled her hand back and looked back at your mother. “Glad she didn't get your looks that would have been a shame.” You couldn't help but chuckle when she said that. Your mom had a shocked expression on her face.

“Wow I see your sarcasim hasn't changed.” You liked this woman she wasn't like your moms other friends.

“Mom the movers want you to sign the papers.” You heard someone say from the door. Peeking around your moms friend you saw a boy who was a little on the short side standing at the door. He was cute sort of that typical boy next door kind of cute. He wore a plain black t-shirt and some jeans that had paint all over them with black and white chucks on. 'Yup typical boy next door look.' you thought to yourself.

“Okay I'll be there in a second. This is my son Kihyun, Kihyun come say hello.” Stepping in the house Kihyun walked up to you and your mom.

“Hello.” He greeted with a wave.

“This is y/n, she goes to the same school your going to be going to.” His mom said and you just nodded. He smiled at you and you were surprised at how nice his smile was.

“I can show you around on monday if you would like.”

“I'd like that.” he said then both him and his mother left your house to go finish doing what they had to do.

“He's cute right?” Your mom nudged your arm.

“Don't get any ideas mom.” You said as you walked away from her and back into your room.

You found out on monday that you were a year older than him so you didn't have any classes with him but that was alright with you. He had made friends immidetly, so the walk to school and back was really the only time you hung out with him. The years passed by and you and Kihyun became close like brother and sister. You never saw him in that light and he never saw you as anything other then your sister.

Before you knew it you were a senior and it was graduation day. Your parents threw you a graduation party inviting everyone. Your friends were there having a good time and so were you but you just weren't that into it. You noticed Kihyun walking up to where you were hiding yourself from the rest of the party.

“Is cinderella running out of her own party?” He asked leaning against the chair infront of you. He looked amazing that night, a pair of nice dress pants and a pale blue button up that fit his lean frame.

“Haha you're so funny Kiki.” you smiled at the nickname you gave him, he on the other hand didn't really care for it.

“So what's eating you? Why are we keeping ourselves hidden in the corner of your own party?” He sat down in the chair opposite of you. As sharp as his mouth is he still was one of the most caring people you ever met.

Sighing you leaned your back on the chair letting your hrad fall back, “I don't know like this is just weird for me.” Lifting your head so you could look at him. “You know I don't do well with change Kihyun.”

“Is that what you're worried about?” He scooted closer to you and grabbed your hands. “Nothing will change. In a year I'll come meet up with you at the same college and save you from that sad life you will live okay?”

That made you smile, he always made you smile. You were going to miss your best friend. “I know but I dont know it just feels weird you know?” He could still sense your uncertency about everything and made you stand up.

“Don't think about and come dance with us okay?” He pulled you to the dance floor where you greeted by friends and family alike.

Soon the summer passed and it was time for you to go move into the dorms at your out of state college. Putting the last box in the truck you looked back at your house and shoved your hands in the pockted of the jeans you were wearing.

“It's gonna be weird not walking to school with you any more.” You heard a voice say behind you, Looking over your shoulder you saw Kihyun standing there holding a small present. “Here a little going away gift for you.” He handed you the small wrapped box. Looking at him then looking at the box you slowly opened it and say it was a necklace with a small crystal attached to it.

“It's a healing crystal, I know you like that kind of stuff.” he smiled when he saw your eyes widen.

“Kihyun, thank you so much I love it!” Pulling him into a hug. You felt his arms wrap around you giving a litte squeeze. He buried his face in your shoulder and whispered something into that you held onto for a long time.

“I'll miss you.”

“I'll miss you too.”

Those were the last words you both said to each other in person. You went off to college, at first you texted each other every day. But slowly the texts went from every day to a few times a week to once a week, then to once a month then only on your birthdays then nothing at all. Life had caught up with you and it did the same for him. He never went to the same college as you and you were busy with classes and papers you forgot about it too.

At 22 you graduated with a degree in history and were working on getting your teaching liscence. You always wanted to teach high school students and history was a passion of yours. And three years later here you were teaching a class all your own. You loved every minute of it, and your kids loved you too.

“Hey y/n!” Looking up from your desk you saw your friend Gina at the doorway of your classroom.

“Hey Gi what's up?” Looking at her you put the papers you were marking away giving Gina your attention.

“It's friday and I wanted to know if you were up to go to this party with me?” She asked as she sat herself in one of the student's desks'. You loved Gina she was the best friend anyone could ask for, but she was a party animal. She still kept in touch with people on her old schools campus and knew when the frat's were having parties.

“Sure I havent been out in a while.”

“Oh good. I'll pick you at 9 okay.” getting up to leave you just nodded your head and told her to text you when she was outside.

Before you knew it, you were walking up the stairs to a frat house. People were haning put on the porch, the party seemed to have spilt out of the house.

“This is a pretty big party Gina.” You said as you followed her through the crowd of people.

“Well this is there biggest party of the year. Plus finals just finished this week.” She shrugged pulling you to the kitchen. “You never partied in college?” She pulled one of those red solo cups from the pile and poured you a drink.

“I did when I was dating this one asshole but not since then.” Taking a sip of your drink you looked around the crowd of people. Some were playing beer pong, dancing or just talking to friends.

“Oh that guy. I remember you telling me about him.” shacking her head she too took a sip of her drink as well. Just the thought of your ex made you want to throw up. He was a class A assshole. He liked to show you off to his friends as if you were a trophy. At fisrt it was cute but then it became a little bit too much for you. His ideal of a woman was she needs to be dumb, serve him like he is a king and speak only when spoken too. After that you told yourself you were done with the men. Being alone was fine with, you still had your ocassional one night stands cause at the end of the day you still had neededs. You were fine with being friends with benefits, but they always wanted more.

“Gina!” Looking you saw a guy push past people and grab Gina in a hug.

“Oh my goodness! Changkyun!!” She looked at you with a smile from ear to ear. “y/n! This is Changkyun, he was my best friend when we went to school.”

“Hello Changkyun I'm y/n.” You shook his hand.

“Nice to meet you.” He smiled showing off his dimples. 'He's cute.' You thought as you pulled your hand away.

“Come me and my friends are in the back.”

You and gina followed him through the house and out the backdoor. “Guys this is Gina the one I told you about and her friend y/n” Before you could even say hello someone interrupted you.

“Y/N?!”

[openmymindup-blog]

Beautiful minds

I was outside on a cloudy day, I remember looking at these wooden carpentry pencils and old rusted pocket knives; they were all red, my grandfathers facorite color. He was a very beautiful man, he would tell us stories about how he could chew a penny open with his teeth, or that we could build air planes out of cardboard; and we tried. He inspired me and my older sister to dream, to think of things even if they seemed hard. He was my favorite out of my whole family. I found this bouncy ball after most of my family gathered at my house to morn his death. I felt hurt, but I didnt want all the hugs, I just wanted to be alone and feel my own feelings. I remember looking up at the sky and something really strong pulled at me, I'll never forget the way it felt because I still feel it to this day. It spoke to me with out words, with out physical apearance. It told me that spirits of people that die dont die with them, that there are other places they go, and suddenly I didnt feel hurt anymore, maybe his absense kind of hits me once in a while, but I always remember that he is out there, and as long as I know this I have no reason to morn. This is when things changed for me. Right after my grandfathers death I started having dreams, I guess I could also call them memories. I have always been able to remember my dreams often, and rarely have a night that I dont dream. I was watching my older sister blow out her birthday cake, we were outside on a cooler day. Her birthday cake was purple and green, I remember how short her hair was and the face she made looking up, but I was standing in mid length looking down at her. I asked my mother about this and she told me I was still in the womb. She was almost seven months pregnant with me. Growing up, even home schooled I had a sensere since of self, of knowing who I was, and the body I have inherited. I never complained about not having toys or getting what I wanted, I had a strong sense of responsibility and love towards others. Although my parents were both mentally and physically abusive I still saw them, not as my parents but as people who were lost, who didnt know what they were doing. A lack of self love was immediatly noticeable to me as a child. None the less I continued to soak up my surroundings and analyze all that I could, all with the same feeling I feel today, like this is all temporary and for some odd reason I was chosen to be here. My first organized facination with being human was the emotion we call love. I recognized all these boys in school as objects of effection, thats not to say I went around loving and falling inlove with everyone. I greatly appreciated people for their characters, I thought they were playful, fun and open minded as most youth seem to be. Each individual person had their own energy and even though I had no clue why I dated them just to see what they were about, not out of deep love or desire more out of curiousity, I kept doing it and the more I did the more I got to see the truth behind human nature. Though youth seem to still be organizing or changing their own charactors, they also seemed to be altered by atmospheric changes or ego. Often those who did not have a keen sense of self would follow crowds or copy what others did just to see where they fit in, or so they fit into a social norm. Which is natural for human nature but its not the defining act that makes us powerful in our own ways. In all the years I spent getting to know all these different characters, watching them grow, do bad things to each other and neglect human connection for human desire, I noticed the foundation beneath all of these activities was a reflection of how people felt about themselves. Boys desired girls strongly. Even seeking revenge for not getting what they wanted; I could assume male hormones at this age played a great part, how ever some of the acts were out of anger and built up negativity from family life, even a social life that was not spiritually promising nore progressive. No one was there to make them think about themselves, just a constant distraction of learning about the world but self last. This is where I learned alot about love and how others go about it. None of them seemed to love themselves this showed in alcohol abuse, self harm, fights, even using meth. I guess logically I have to point out that the atmopshere in which children and teens grow up does influence and play a huge rule in who they become and how they love, how ever most of their stories and actions in future adventures were based on a non-self love attitude which they got from their envirenment. I saw alot of parental abuse, big lashes of bruises and even blood from a fight, this made them feel unloved, unwanted, not good enough and in return it reflected on their desires, the people they hung out with and the drugs they took etc. I delt with alot of family conflict as a child, my father was extremely abusive, I went to school with bruises on my wrist, a black eye from my mother which resulted in divorce. I was what seemed like a problem for my family. I asked too many questions or on projects I wasnt allowed to do things on my own, so I started to do things with out asking becuase I knew if I sat around and waited my turn no one would let me have it. So instead of asking to get my training wheels taken off I took them off myself, instead of asking what cloths I could get I got them myself, instead of asking if I could stay out and party all night I did it and never felt bad for one minute of it. I knew safety, I knew that I was supposed to take care of my body and those around me. At 13 I started disapeaing from home and even spend months at a friends house, some of them I even reffered to as mom and dad because they played better roles than my father did, my mother disapeared from the picture at the age of twelve. I was the one driving my drunking friend from a party who stole her step parents care at 3am, taking care of her step brother and sister, I did everything I could to take care of those I loved and at my own expense, mean while still drinking and smoking pot. I went a few years with out contact of that force that pulled at me that one day, and I had a very human journey, but love still grew inside of me deeper than the ocean and I knew with my actions I would speak the loudest of them all because everything I did was to nurture myself or nurture others, nothing ever done out of revenge or hate towards others not even my abusive parents. The time and space I gave myself away from others was to heal, people got mad yes, but I knew what healed me and I knew what was good for me and what was not. The only reason I loved really broken people was because I knew their stories and I knew they needed a positive roll model, even broken and hurt as I was, I stayed for their sake, and in this I broke myself some more, but I knew it would happen, it was love that got me in and love that got me out. I was never able to verbalize the things I felt, the things I heard in silence. I could feel pain in someone while they were smiling. I could feel the desire to run away in feet that stuck around. I knew what they wanted, but no way to say it, no way to let it out. It wasnt until fall of 2013 that I discovered how to do it. I went to a barterfair with a friend of mine who was going to fry on mushrooms with me and basically baby sit me. I remember the rustic taste in my mouth, it reminded me of the dirt that was left on the leaves of the vegieables that I would eat straight out of my mothers garden as a child. A very earthy taste. Even through my nervousness, my bloody nose that followed, my heart told me it was right. I needed to do this for me. I ate a little bit and walked over to this group of people all talking, a weird sensation that I had peed my pants was strong, even asking if I had pissed my pants. I sat down and everything slowed down, I remember every one talking and I was watching their mouths move but the sound seemed to be mute. Something in the woods was calling me, alot like that pull I felt from the sky, just more stronger, more full of love. I sat up and I started walking, as I was on my way to a patch of woods I felt my knees get weak, a pain inside of my chest I needed to feel filled me to the very ends of my toes. I felt a love so strong for earth, for the grass and trees, I felt one with it. After making it to a safe secluded area of woods away from people I dropped to my knees and I pulled at the grass, crying my eyes out and I remember saying repeatively " I'm so sorry" over and over again. When I look back on it I know why I felt that way. Humans are parasites, very neglectful, self satisfying creatures who destroy earth for personal gain, this was what I was feeling. Apologetic to the needs of earth hit me like an astroid. I spent a good two hours in the woods talking to the trees and petting the grass in my own love for earth, for having compassion in what matters most. When I made my way out of the woods I whiped my eyes dry and walked around the fair, looking at rocks and different peices of jewelry that people were selling. I felt connected to all the people I spoke to, they were in their own energy, I could feel them thinking their own thoughts, and the ones walking around with broken hearts and sad optimism. I sat down with a friend I went to high school with and I started telling him about himself, about his striving character and how all people are like dirty dish clothes, they are all used up but thats what makes them so beautiful. I remember saying that to alot of people, and I felt so much love and compassion for them it has never been so clear in my life as to why I am here, I was a mirror and when people can see themselves not through judgement but through truth they can change out of self love. I wanted to be that mirror. I think empathy and judgement can be mistaken for one another. While some people are out there telling people they are broken in some sort of method to destroy someones spirit or make them feel worthless, there are those of us who can see a broken heart and instead of telling them with hidden agendas we tell them out of love, and once someone knows that they can be seen, they feel naked, they feel that someone understands. Depending on how open the person is, they can either take it as judgement or an option to open up and make changes. I have often been told that by observing the human race I am also making judgements, but let me ask you when you hear me speak, who am I speaking for? If I make a broken mass about my own desires, that I dislike it, that I hate people for being the way they are, that is judgement. You will always hear me say that I hope really good things for those who have wronged me for I am the one who suffers when I harnis negative energy against them. I can look at a man and say "he is wearing a pink shirt" -that is an obervation, a judgement often times sounds like this "wow, he is wearing a pink shirt, he doesnt look good in it because pink is an ugly color" not only is it not my part to say what he looks good in, but I would be harnising a resentful energy against someone I dont even know, and for what? Humans are conditioned to self serve, which can be out of ego or out of love. When we truly love ourselves and forgive those who have hurt us we not only nurture our spirits but we nurture others as well. The drive to nurture others is based on our desire to take care of ourselves and the knowledge we obtain during the journey of self love is so intense and uplifting that to hold it in would be wasteful if we didnt show others how we got to where we are. You will know you have reached your most loved self when it becomes harder to hold in all that information that got you into that self love state.

[transssexualheart]

you should do all of the no limit questions

:^)) thank you my dude

1. kissed a girl?

nope :,)

2. kissed a boy?

yes to that one

3. had sex in public?

no,, ive never had sex

4. what’s your religion?

idk i guess i don’t have one but im not atheist either i just exist

5. what does your url mean?

umbreon is my fav pokemon so

6. reason you joined tumblr?

saw a lot of screenshots of posts on instagram and thought it would be cool, i was wrong

7. do you have any nicknames?

my mom calls me “rainbow”, my friend calls me “eleven” because i have a buzzcut, my brother calls me “a disgrace to humanity”

8. do you like bubble baths?

yes holy shit

9. kissed in the rain?

nope

10. dyed your hair?

used to, before i buzzed it and it got too dark to dye without bleach anyway

11. soup or salad?

salad probably

12. vegetable or meat?

depends on my mood

13. go out drinking?

im 14

14. smoke cigarettes?

still 14

15. smoke weed?

nah, probably would if someone offered me bc my parents don’t care i just dont have money or care enough

16. do any hard drugs?

nah

17. have you had sex today?

no

18. have you ever fallen asleep in someone’s arms?

i might have actually? im remembering this time years ago when my friend came over to my house to sleep over and we slept in my one bed and it’s super tiny so she was like “ur my teddy bear now” and we kinda had to be cuddling a lil to both fit in the bed so i probably fell asleep in her arms that one time but i can’t remember. anyway, not since then but i wouldn’t complain if we repeated that

19. already answered!

20. has anyone ever told you that you have pretty eyes?

i think? maybe?

21. skipped doing hw to play a video game?

who do you think i am of course i have

22. tried to commit suicide?

ive never tried to, i spent those nights trying NOT to

23. the last time you felt broken?

everyday

24. had to lie to EVERYONE about how you felt?

no, i was never very good at hiding it. in sixth grade is when i would’ve tried to hide it but i didn’t have many people to hide it from, i had two friends and wasn’t very close to either of them. my teacher knew though because i had just moved and my dad had died so it was easy for her to think that i might be sad and i had few friends and i was easily that stereotypical depressed kid so she figured it out, other than that i didn’t really tell many people how sad i was

25. do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?

no, im single

26. do you have long hair or short hair?

short, buzzcut

27. first thing you notice in a guy/girl?

idk, probably makeup if they’re wearing any and personality

28. do you sing in the shower?

i do, i sing almost every time im alone because i love love singing but ill cry if i do it in front of people

29. already answered!

30. where were you yesterday?

in a musical

31. ever used a bow and arrow?

yeah actually, my uncle has one and i tried it out once

32. last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer?

school photos

33. do you think musicals are cheesy?

i fuckin love musicals my man i was in one today, not all of them are it depends on the musical of course you can’t just lump all of them into one category, of course some are but some aren’t

34. is christmas stressful?

yes, but at the same time it’s my fav holiday

35. favorite type of fruit pie?

does pumpkin count? because pumpkin

36. occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid?

an actor or singer, ive wanted to animate since sixth grade though and i still love both acting and singing but i don’t think i could make a career out of them

37. do you believe in ghosts?

idk man

38. ever had a deja-vu feeling?

ya

39. take a vitamin daily?

nope

40. wear slippers?

i do

41. wear a bathrobe?

i don’t

42. what do you wear to bed?

oversized t shirt and baggy pants/sweatpants, or in the summer usually nothing

43. do you want to get married?

yep

44. can you curl your tongue?

i can

relationship preferences

45: how many relationships have you had?

three, but one of them was like two days so it probably doesn’t count

46. how can i win your heart?

idk make me laugh,, good eyebrows,, there aren’t really qualifications just be a good person and if i like you i like you

47. what makes a great relationship?

communication, laughter, and affection

48. already answered!

49. non existent??

50. religious or non religious?

i dont care

51. caring or non restricting of you?

i def need them to care about me and stop me from doing shit like hurting myself but if it’s like they won’t let me live my life then no

52. straight edge or non straight edge?

i don’t care i just love people my man

53. piercings or no piercings?

i don’t cAre,, like i love piercings but the girl i currently like won’t even pierce her ears i don’t give a darn 

54. tattoos or non tattoos?

almost everyone ive ever liked hasn’t had a tat bc all my crushes are my age ish and the most people have a stick and pokes but i still don’t care i would date somebody with tats for sure

55. quiet stay at home type or party type?

i don’t CARE,,, literally i just love who i love it really doesn’t have much to do with anything but if they make me laugh and smile, if they’re a good person, and if things happen to play out that way

[auswriteforyou]

Blurb List:

1. "What did i say about the knife? You don't bring knives to social gatherings." 2. "put the cake down , we have to leave" 3. "The only reason I'm here for the food so could you hold off the murder til I get some mini sausages?" 4. "Oops, that's not what that's supposed to be used for." 5. "assface, literally he put his ass on his face." 6. "What kind of super ability is that? My dog can do that but you don't see me putting him in a cape and calling him The Growl." 7. "I know it's your job to save the world and all, but it's not mine so if you could be a little quieter...." 8. "Why are you checking your phone?" 9. "Babe, look! It's holding my hand." 10. "That is not a dog." 11. "Which one of you fuckers stole my stickers?" 12. "All the single ladies, put your hands up!" 13. "You're not single. I am literally your (boyfirend/girlfriend/other)." 14. "Why does she get a cape but I dont?" 15. "Guns, seriously? No one said bring guns, pants, yes but not guns." 16. "I dare you to pants him." 17. "Suck my dick!" "You have a vagina." 18. "If I was straight, I'd fuck you." 19. "My sexuality is this bottle of beer and that chocolate cake, do not touch me." 20. "Awww, look at the cute little -WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?" 21. "I will hit you with this banana." 22. "So what I hear you saying is, hit them with my fist but softly." 23. "Because I fucking love you, that's why." 24. "Did that guy  just hit on me while I was arresting him?" 25. "I am too sober for this." 26. "I am too single for this." 27. "I am so tired of this." 28. "It was supposed to be you, it was always you." 29. "I want a divorce." 30. "Let's get married." 31. "If those imbeciles think our akin colour means we can't love each other, then they are obviously blind." 32. "Ask me." 33. "Are you cheating on me?" 34. "What if I said I like you?" 35. "What if you didn't?" 36. "Please don't make this weird." 37. "You're like 2016, you fucking suck." 38. "I love you, I'm sorry if I don't let you know enough." 39. "If love was a colour, it would be the shade of your eyes." 40. "Is this sadness feels like?" 41. "I have been sad for so long I  don't know how to be anything else." 42. "I don't think that's going to fit." 43. "How about this, you fucking listen to me for once." 44. "You know how I said I love you? I don't anymore." 45. "Who the fuck is My Love?" 46. "I don't like this, it's a dumb idea and I hate you." 47. "I'm sorry." 48. "Follow my lead - how can you follow me if you are in front of me?" 49. "If I had one wish, it would be to have never met you and wasted my life on someone who never cared." 50. "So let me get this, you closed your dick in the door."

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Send in your number and fandom/actor/actress/character and you will get a blurb (or an imagine because my ass doesn’t know what the word short means) based on the sentence! If you have specific ideas about what you want, send those in too!

-Dria. Request here. Masterlist.