#like I know it makes the shading more coherent but idk sometimes I like the more grading shading

[arolesbianism]

Another quick drawing from last night

[americxn]

hi can i please request a kai x female reader imagine where the reader dies in his arms and its just pure angst with him screaming and crying and clutching her dead body? and him telling her he loved her.

kinda like your other imagine (his darkness) but instead she dies.

okay thanks <3

Too Late (Kai Anderson x GN!Reader)

a/n: this is basically just an alternative ending to an older fic: 

https://americxn.tumblr.com/post/648019215903784960/his-darkness-kai-x-reader

and I hadn’t realised how much my writing had changed until I changed the original fic but damn, my old writing was so messy (it still is but you get my point).

wordcount: 2k warnings: angst, death (idk what that’s like so this is definitely not accurate), grief, bullet wound, blood 

The gun shot echoed through the large warehouse, Kai’s shout falling on deaf ears as time seemed to warp and slow. You paused, blinking stupidly, your brain seeming to fall utterly silent as Kai sprinted for you, his face a contorted mix of fury and terror as the bullet cut through the air, right at you.  The pain didn’t register at first, just the sickening impact as flesh and tissue was shredded, the small piece of metal burrowing itself into you, ripping through sinew and slamming into bone. Your breath rushed from you as you looked down, your hands seeming to move in slow motion as they raised to cradle your stomach, your legs giving out beneath you. Finally, with another blink, the world became coherent again, time righting itself once more as the concrete of the floor rose up, up, your body cold as it slammed into the hard ground. Another series of gunshots notified that you your assailant had been shot down, too, Kai abandoning his troupe of cult members as he hurtled for you, lunging just in time to shove his hand between your head and the hard floor as you fell. “Holy shit, y/n?” He cried frantically, moving to support your head in his lap, his own hands batting yours out of the way to press over the perforation in the lower quadrant of your stomach.

He yelled something over his shoulder, the words inaudible to you as you blinked up at Kai, your own breaths too loud in your ears as your hands fell limply to your sides, the slipperiness of your own hot blood coating your fingers making your head spin and your chest constrict. “Y/n?” Kai spoke down to you a shade quieter, his face just as gaunt as yours as he yelled another order to his followers across the large space of the warehouse before glancing down at you once more, his eyes wide and teary in panic.  “Hold on, y/n, you’re okay. Just give me a minute.” He half instructed, half pleaded as he removed his hands from your wound momentarily to tear off his shirt. Suddenly, another somewhat familiar face appeared before yours, but you kept your eyes on Kai, feeling sickeningly helpless as he pressed his shirt to your stomach in an attempt to staunch the blood flow. “Kai,” you whispered, panic creeping into your tone as the pain finally began to register, a splitting, burning sensation beginning to work its way from the site of the bullet outwards. His wide eyes found yours, one of his hands leaving your stomach to rest on your cheek, his own palm clammy against the thin sheen of sweat coating the skin there, some of your hot blood being smeared onto the side of your face. “I’m fine.” You gritted out on a sharply exhaled breath, trying to convince yourself as prickling alarm began to work its way into your consciousness at the pain unfurling within you, hot and searing.  “I know. You’re absolutely fine.” Kai said, glancing to his frantic squad of cult members to ensure that they did as they were instructed. You nodded shallowly, the back of your head rubbing against his thighs. Gasping, your forced yourself to relax, clenching and unclenching your fingers as Kai continued to bark orders above you. “But it hurts.” You whimpered, beginning to shiver. A tear fell onto Kai’s cheek and he turned his head to wipe it away hastily on the shoulder of his shirt, praying that you wouldn’t notice the single salty droplet. “I know. It’s okay for it to hurt.” He reassured, his voice softer than you had ever heard it before. In the midst of your pain your heart warmed as his hand began to rub your cheek. After all the shit you and Kai had done and said to one another, it sometimes amazed you how much he still cared for you. Blinking slowly, you opened yourself up to him, allowing him to behold your gratitude and the care that you had for him, too, your eyes gleaming with wordless emotion. A stabbing pain radiated from your core as your shivering began to get more aggressive and you yelped quietly, you head titling back as you forced yourself to breathe through the pain. “Y/n? Please, just give me a minute, help is coming.” You groaned lowly in response, nausea unfurling in your stomach. Kai’s voice seemed to get quieter, as if he were getting further away and your eyelids began to feel heavy. How long had you been lying here? How long did it take for life to evade you if the bullet had torn through something vital? “Y/n, keep your eyes open.” Kai instructed, his tone still so painfully gentle but firm, his hand patting your cheek softly as your eyes drifted closed. Opening them again, you met his gaze, your fingers going utterly cold. “I’m tired.” You muttered. Kai nodded, a single tear falling as he blinked harshly, his voice breaking as he reassured you that feeling tired was also okay but “you have to stay awake until help gets here.” When your eyes closed again, a wrenching gasping breath sounded from above your head, Kai bending over to rest his forehead on yours. Hot tears fell onto your forehead as Kai sobbed over your body, the hand on your cheek patting your face again as he composed himself, lifting his face slightly from yours. “Please.” He begged. Your eyes opened in answer, fighting against the devastatingly strong urge to give into the black void calling your name, begging you to let go and give yourself to the darkness. Your teeth gritted as you focused with all your might on Kai’s hand on your cheek, allowing his touch to ground you. Kai whispered soft words of encouragement as you forced yourself to gasp one breath after another.  “I’m not ready for you to leave me yet.” Kai admitted in a whisper above you, his tears hot as they continued to roll off his chin, landing on your clammy forehead. Words evaded you but your eyes locked with his, blinking slowly up at Kai, a surge of icy panic washing through you as you felt your grip on consciousness beginning to slip, dangling over the yawning void that opened up beneath you and whispered quietly, beckoning you to let go of the man cradling you and fall into it’s endless depths.  Your chest rattled as you sucked down another hitching breath, your heart pulsing firmly within your chest, it’s rhythm faltering, struggling to sluggishly continue pumping your life source through you.  The void whispered to you again, calling your name, louder this time. Your body was falling numb. Kai’s name was poised on your dry tongue, struggling to fall from your lips as the pit of nothingness opened wider beneath you, it’s tendrils of darkness reaching for you, weaving through your fingertips and licking softly at your face with cool flames. You had so much to say to him. To the man leant over your body, his eyes bright with tears as they desperately scanned your own, watching in terror as the light slowly dissipated from your gaze, irises glassing over. But you couldn’t push any of the words from your tongue, a hot tear of your own leaking down the side of your face and disappearing into the hair at your ear as the ribbons of velvety blackness crept further over your body, whispering sweetly to you as they snaked over your limp frame. A weak grunt was all you could muster, your hand too heavy to place over the one he used to stroke your cheek, your heart splintering as all energy evaded you.  You couldn’t even say goodbye. You had left it too late, his desperately spoken words having convinced you that you could remain with him, filling you with cruelly false hope. What little grip you clung onto him with faltered, sending you toppling into the void that sang with warm delight, welcoming you as you fell. Kai’s lips moved as you watched your body sag completely in his hold, his face crumpling with raw, undiluted panic as you chest fell, never to rise again. Time seemed to slow, allowing you to drink in the sight of his face one final time, his scream of agonising anguish quiet to your ears as you fell and fell and fell before being swallowed entirely by the cocooning darkness.

His face contorted into a broken cry, dread like he had never known taking him in it’s grip as he shook the body draped limply across his lap. He couldn’t bare the sight of the blood crusted hands, once so lissom and soft, falling away from the body, their backs colliding with the blood smattered concrete floor of the warehouse, utterly lifeless, all colour draining from the face that he had grown completely smitten for, the eyes cold and staring unseeingly back at him. It felt as if his chest had been cleaved in two, shredding and ripping a chasm cutting through his being, taking away his ability to do so much as take a full breath as he folded over the vacant body, his forehead hot as it rested against the one which was rapidly cooling. The small group of cult members had fallen quiet, going utterly still as they watched their leader collapse over the body, his rasping screams chilling them to the bone; they had been too late. Help hadn’t arrived in time. And now it was all that they could do but watch as their divine ruler was ripped apart by anguish, the trembling of his fingertips that clutched onto the body evident even from across the large, cold space as he gathered the corpse to him, rocking pitifully back and forth and sobbing hoarsely into the limp strands of hair.  His tears were hot as the dripped onto the absent face, frozen in wide eyed unease, a declaration of love still poised on the cooling lips, parted slightly from the final breath that had been pulled from the stony air in a futile attempt to cling to the life that had been torn from the ailing fingertips. He, too, struggled to heave down hitching breaths of air, a mumbled string of words tumbling from his quivering lips as he continued to shake the body beneath him, clinging to the little warm still staining the dull skin, barely audible over the hoarse cries breaking out of him. A terrible nausea settled over his tremoring body, so full of overbearing emotion in comparison to the husk clasped into his warmth. He willed the body to hear, to listen to his voice and take one more gasping breath, if only so that he could offer the faded life the parting words that he hadn’t had courage to say when the body glowed with feeling. “I love you.” He moaned into the body, his chest igniting in agony as he struggled to push the words out past the sobs racking through his body. “I love you.” He repeated, groaning in despair, choking on his own anguish as he murmured those three words over and over, each repetition growing increasingly abhorrent on his tongue; if only he had been struck by that bullet. If only he could take the place of the body clutched in his grasp. If only he hadn’t been such a coward and had told the body the same words that now poured from his cracked lips when it was still occupied by life. They had to pry the body away from him, his fingers grappling with the clothes hanging limply around it in an effort to take it with him, to find a way to breathe the life back into it and tell it what he hadn’t been daring enough to tell it before. That he loved them.

taglist: @kitwalker02 @three-eyed-snail @forevercountess @kitwalkerangel @milly-louise @thecountessesglove @undeadcortez @kitwalker64 @samsassinparvismagna @xmaximoffic @divineruler @liandav @tatesweaterweather @evanmybeloved @tatelangdonsupremacist @ikkleroniekins @ananad1 @shlutnutt @sanni333 @mossybank (dm to be added or removed <3)

[youngbeezer]

Idk if you would write for him, but that last prompt, the flower one screams Wade Allison to me

Referenced Post

Prompt -- 14. Bringing me flowers for no reason (w Wade Allison)

A/N: Here's another blurb from the 14 oddly romantic things blurb set. This one was literally so cute to write!!

Thanks for requesting this, hope you like it :)

Word Count: 768

Warning(s): stress (mainly about school), anxiety?, but other than that super fluffy as usual

Join my taglist :)

Finals week was coming up. The past two days have consisted of the following three things; making flash cards/study guides, studying, and stressing out about not being prepared enough. My life has just been a constant loop of hand cramps, headaches, and stress. My friends have told me that I tend to immerse myself into unhealthy habits when I get stressed out about exams or school in general. All I know is I need to pass these exams to get good grades and to be able to graduate so I can get a steady job and income to support myself. If I don’t see my friends or boyfriend for a few days while I study, or if I have a few sleepless nights, it won’t be the end of the world as long as I get everything done and pass these exams.

I know I have a ton of missed calls and messages from my friends and my boyfriend worrying about me, but I ignore them as I continue reviewing some chapter notes. Now that I think about it, the last time I even checked my phone was to check the time-- which was around 4 a.m., and it’s light out now, so I’m guessing I studied through the night again.

I throw my hair up into a messy bun and then rub at my eye that begins to twitch. I go to take a sip of my [fourth] coffee when I hear keys jingling in my door. I take a quick peek at the opening door to find my boyfriend Wade walking in. I give him a quick close lipped smile while mumbling out a barely coherent, “Hey,” and then bring my attention back to my study notes.

I hear a faint “Jesus a/n,” come from Wade before he disappears out of my peripheral vision.

A few minutes have passed of complete silence, so I look up in search of where my boyfriend went.

“Wade?” I called out.

“Yeah. I’m in the kitchen.” He responds back.

I find my coffee mug almost empty, so I decide to head into the kitchen to get a refill and see what Wade is up to.

I stop dead in my tracks and my heart bursts with love at the sight in front of me. Wade is standing in front of the kitchen island holding a beautiful bouquet of flowers in his hand and my favorite takeout all laid out on the counter next to him. He gives me a cheesy little grin that makes my heart soar even more.

“What’s all this for?” I beamed.

I see his cheeks turn the lightest shade of pink as a blush forms as he scratches the base of his neck. “Uh,” He stutters out before clearing his throat and continuing with much more conviction now, “You’ve been working really hard these past few days with your finals upcoming. And I know sometimes you can push yourself a little too hard and not even realize it… So I figured I would come over and try to take your mind off of everything for a little while.” His blush returns once more when he goes to add, “Oh.. and these flowers reminded me of you so I got them.. For you.”

Tears start to spring into the corners of my eyes at the thoughtfulness of this incredible man standing in front of me that I get to call my boyfriend.

He grows alarmed when he sees my tears and stammers out, “Oh, oh no don’t cry! Did I offend you? Do you not like the flowers?”

I let out a teary chuckle before responding, “No, these are happy tears.” I make my way over to him and immediately bring him into my arms. “And, I love the flowers. You don’t understand how much I needed this.”

I lift my head off of his chest and stare up into his eyes. I go on my tippy toes and pucker my lips to let him know what want. He responds by meeting my lips halfway into a short and sweet kiss. “Thank you,” I murmured. Another kiss. “I love you.”

He gives me one last kiss on my forehead before replying back, “I love you too.” He pulls away and gently nudges me toward the doorway.

“Alright, now go take a shower before you give Oscar the Grouch a run for his money.” He teases.

I playfully scoff before making my way out of the kitchen. I stop in the doorway and look back at Wade batting my eyelashes at him and ask, “Are you joining me?”

He grins back, “Oh, say less.”

Tagging a few people so this doesn't flop,,,

@heatherawoowoo @barzysandmarnersbitch @joelsfarabeee @joelfarabeezer @joelsfarabee @yungbeez @fratboyzegras @samsteel @rosesvioletshardy @matbarzls @matbarzys @gigissports @musiclove-12 @yungbezzer @turcsandzegras @iwantahockeyhimbo @jordiee95 @papacarter

[miyuskye]

Today I stumbled on old posts from people reacting to the sk8 finale. I want to make a premise and say that I also felt mixed emotions after it and I was sure that there was something wrong with it. After two months and a half I can say with certainty that the only thing that felt wrong was the lack of episode time, but oh well. Thinking back about sk8, I feel that the writers and the director did the best they could with the time they had.

I think that the main source of confusion stemmed from people misunderstanding the point of the plot. I'm putting myself also among these people because I was so sad that Tadashi forfeited his match vs Langa, but after thinking calmly about that I realized that I just wanted to see Tadashi skate because I am this whipped for him XD and, in reality, even if he had a match with Langa, it would have probably ended the same way -- with Tadashi forfeiting the race midway and letting Langa win (since it's hinted that he's a skating god and Langa beat Adam because he was lucky). This is coherent with the small number of available episodes and Tadashi's arc.

Back to the general public confusion. I'm sure a lot of people were blinded by Renga and totally missed the point the staff wanted to make. It was confirmed in an interview that "sk8 is the story of Adam's search for his Eve", whatever this means (it could be Adam finding his Eve in either Tadashi or Langa, i.e. finding his Eve through the concept that skating is fun). The point is that the focus is on Adam and always has been on Adam. The fandom gave into a collective thinking that Adam was a pedophile and an abuser, but that's clearly not how the staff wanted to portray him. He is obsessed with Langa because he finds in him a worthy and, most importantly, equal partner, he adores Langa and given how loudly he expresses his feelings (i.e. painting a pierced heart over red chrysanthemum to shout out his feelings for Tadashi) his attitude toward him is just the embodiment of that. He isn't interested in Langa because of the power imbalance between them (again, he sees Langa as his equal); he just doesn't want to be alone.

And, yes, the final episodes clearly fit into the narrative of "skating should be fun" because Langa understands (through Reki) that skating with friends is fun and makes Adam remember that (meanwhile he realizes that Tadashi, his friend, was by his side all of this time). Langa, at the beginning, thought that skating was all about the thrill and the adrenaline. He didn't understand that it was fun and amazing to do it with friends/ the people you care about (paralleling to how he didn't realize why he stopped snowboarding when his father died). That's why from ep 7 to 10 he doesn't feel anything. It's because it was all about being with someone you care about, both in skating and snowboarding. He understands that through his relationship with Reki, but my point (and prolly the point a lot of people missed) is that it's general and it doesn't limit itself to Reki and Reki only. I don't want to invalidate Renga, of course not, I like the pairing and the ending makes it clear that Langa's happiness is skating with Reki especially. But the fun experience that comes from skating is a general thing and him going against Adam is just a consequence of that. He wants to make Adam understand that you should have fun while skating, and he wants to have fun with him because he admires him. He was never scared of Adam, and he generally looked pretty chill even when he smashed Cherry with his board. The only thing that mattered to him before his race against Adam was 'why did he start skating?' and 'he looks like he's not having fun' instead of 'i'm going to make this guy pay for his imaginary crimes with my board'. It was like a argument but between friends, the one that gets you in a fight (idk like Rin taking Haru by his collar in Free lmao) because you both want to stand your ground but still care about the other. Also, Utsumi also confirmed that she wanted them to fight with fists in the last ep XD

So, yeah, sk8's ending falls perfectly in the 'skating should be fun' trope. Moving on, let's talk about Kamata. She's, once again, a target for the fandom collective hysteria and she became like this because they projected their hate for Adam into her. Or into Tadashi sometimes, again completely missing the point that the show is about Adam. A lot of people wanted the police to raid S, but that couldn't be realistically attainable because Adam made sure to take off S from the patrol route again and I'm p sure he took additional measures so it wasn't believable for those measures to be shattered in less than a week (when S has been up and running for 7 years). Let's pretend she somehow managed to search Shindo's house. What would she have found? Nothing accusing Adam of Takano's crime. I understand that Takano's crime wasn't very well detailed but I'm thinking that it was something on the line of being bribed to making a certain kind of contract (when he talks about receiving illegal fundings it's the only thing that came to mind). And, on another note, Adam was the one leaking info to the police in the first place XD first, because he wanted to raise to the top of his party (and just standing in Takano's shade isn't his way to roll) and he wanted to have a leverage on the police, so that he could use that leverage to hide his borderline illegal skateboarding races. But they are two different crimes. Kamata wouldn't have found anything useful for the Takano investigation and, even if she managed to find proofs of S (and that's a big if because I'm sure that Adam and Tadashi go out of their way to hide the S screens also from aunties and the household staff), what can she do with those? They're not related to the investigation at hand and can't be used in that specific trial (which is about Takano receiving illegal fundings). A new trial should have been made and Adam wouldn't surely go to prison in one day XD furthermore, it's clear that Kamata belonged to a subplot and that she was a supporting character. She was never meant to be something more than that. I have a long history of elevating supporting character to something they're clearly not so I'm used not to feel 'betrayed' when this doesn't happen, but probably other people don't.

I don't know if I want to talk about Tadaai AGAIN because I feel like we said plenty about them. TL;DR the relationship is not abusive so the point doesn't stand. Tadashi has agency, and chooses to stay by Adam's side because he wants to (and not because he has... Stockholm syndrome... I cringed while writing that XD)

The last point should be the fact that people felt betrayed that Renga wasn't more canon. which I think stemmed from the fact that Utsumi can't decide what to ship XD she had the same problem in Free because she was torn between MakoHaru and RinHaru, but here?? I'm so sure she ships Renga and Tadaai but she definitely likes Eden too. (She wouldn't have had a whole ass theme song for them if she didn't 😊) and so she couldn't decide what route to take and she ended up taking all of them. Bless her, i love a multi shipping queen 🙏

On this note, I saw also some posts about Adam being a homophobic example of queer villain except for the fact that he's not. The authors have made it clear that they love him to no ends. He's not supposed to be Evil and Unredeemable. I don't know why people are so bent on labelling him with things he's not. My roommate told me that he gave off the creepy vibe at the beginning but she confirmed me that after ep 4 it's clear that he's not meant to be dangerous like the other villains he's compared to. I don't personally like people comparing Adam to Hisoka, for example, because I feel that there are very different intentions behind them. Also, I have a feeling people have never watched a media representation of actual grooming (or something that is closely related to this). There's no grooming in sk8. There are fanfics when people describe Adam this way (and while it's interesting to read them, I feel that he's/very/ OOC there), but he's not like this in the original canon.

Thank you for reading this 🙏

[alittleemo]

thanks for tagging me gab @12monthoctober and eden @pianoandcookiedoughlover and faith @shades-of-greens <3 (i did not realize how many times i did not respond to this dfjhgjlkds you are all darlings <3)

1. why did u choose ur url?

i was tired at lunch one day and figured, ok im short, im also vaguely emo but not committed enough to go full out, so bam im both a little emo (as in noncommittal) and a little emo (as in short) <3

2. any sideblogs?

technically i have one now but i mostly have it to save the url, if i ever actually decide to start streaming ill prob make a blog specifically for that!! (though i think I’d use my alittleemo handle for it anyway so who knows then)

3. how long have u been on tumblr?

a little over a year now!! i think i made this blog in february of 2019 but started using it march/april of last year

4. do u have a queue tag?

i still do not know how to use the queue function dfjkhgkldjsjdflkh

5. why did u start your blog in the first place?

nearly all of my Pinterest feed was tumblr memes anyway so i figured why not go to the source of it all /hj. also i wanted to find more people into aftg and skam

6. why did u choose ur icon/pfp?

matching pfp with gab’s dsmp side blog!!! ae asked me if i wanted to match and i couldn’t pass up the opportunity :D (plus clingy duo / tommyinnit supremacy) i think it’s pretty fitting honestly <3

7. why did u choose ur header?

i love taking shitty pictures of jellyfish and i thought this one ended up looking really cool 

8. how many mutuals do u have?

13!! i have immense fondness for each of you <3

9. how many followers do u have?

39 babey!!!

10. how many people do u follow?

97 currently !!

11. have u ever made a shitpost?

what is anything i post if not complaining or making dumbass posts (affectionate)

12. how often do u use tumblr each day?

yikes. I mean like i am def here several times per day (its gonna be more now too now that its summer) but i feel like i sort of j scroll through my dash and only rb a few things compared to how much i actually see yk

13. did u ever fight/argue w another blog? who won?

no i hate confrontation but i also would rather j block someone trying to start smth w me

14. how do u feel about "u need to reblog these" posts?

going to steal celia and gab’s response bc yall are more coherent than me - sometimes it's too mentally draining to read abt terrible shit all the time. calm down. not everyone needs to read everything. i don't need ur guilt-trip rn. u can get across that a post is imp. w/o that statement. idk. sometimes i ignore them out of spite. i know that i rb a decent number of activism posts but i dont like those ones as much bc the guilt tripping isn’t the way to go

15. do u like tag games?

yes if u ever tag me j know i would instantly deliver cookies to ur house if i could <3 i do however often forget to respond to them until later (hi this tag is from over a week ago dfjkhgljdksh)

16. do u like ask games?

yes i love them immensely i j often again forget to actually finish them whoops

17. which of ur mutuals do u think is tumblr famous?

ik that i have a lot of relatively famous mutuals-in-law, but as for my own mutuals i’d say @lunawedlers and @lesbeanadiamcnll, i feel like yall have such good vibes in that respect <3

18. do u have a crush on a mutual?

like gab said, yes but platonically <3

tagging @coffee-and-moo, @alinastarkovaz, @lesbeanadiamcnll, @lunawedlers and any other mutuals who’d like to do so!!! (as always feel free to ignore as well <3)

[secret-engima]

So I've recently discovered your ffxv aus. I haven't played the game, and it will be at least two weeks until I can play the game because I will be visiting family and away from my ps4, but I adore all of your aus I've read so far. And due to the fact that I've been reading up on them, basically one after the other, and you have all kinds of xovers happening. And I'm curious, how do you think the Galahdians from thrown to the wolves verse would react to Nox and his uncle?

Oooohhhh I hope you have a nice visit with your family and YES GOOD. TRY THE GAME IT’S GOOD.

*cracks knuckles* this is gonna be FUN (and probably long, and probably way angsty).

Short version- TOTAL HORROR.

Long version:

-they- they have no idea how to react. Here is an Ardyn who is, well, on the SURFACE he’s fine, but their Ardyn isn’t that flamboyant and his smiles aren’t that sharp unless he doesn’t feel SAFE and that means this one doesn’t feel safe around them, doesn’t RECOGNIZE THEM as family. He has no braids in his hair and his clothes are not Lazarus make and he calls himself IZUNIA rather than ULRIC or even Lucis Caelum. He stares at them with sharp eyes, his shoulders just a shade too tense to be normal and they- they KNOW Ardyn. Better than this Ardyn knows himself at this point. They can see that he’s a half-step away from drawing his armiger on them if they prove to be a threat.

-And Nox- oh NOX. They do not understand who he is at first. That he is supposed to be REGIS’S child because he’s- idk probably 15 in this mini x-over and so physically only about 8 years younger than the Regis currently staring at him with wide eyes. They don’t understand why he calls Ardyn Uncle and not Grandfather or Sage, but they can see the Arra braid in his hair that is not a marriage braid and that- that makes no sense. Adopted LCs are always given to the Ulrics???

-What do you mean you weren’t rescued as a child, are you not one of those abandoned by the Kinslayers??

-What do you mean you weren’t born in the Citadel or with royal knowledge? You’re an illegitimate? Oh .... okay so who is your father and why is Ardyn your Uncle.

-WHAT DO YOU //MEAN// YOUR FATHER IS REGIS AND HE DOESN’T KNOW YOU EXIST AND THAT YOUR MOTHER WAS ARDYN’S SISTER????????????

-There is- a LOT of rage and grief and horror as they drag the (cover) story out in bits and pieces from Nox and Ardyn even as they bundle them up in the nearest safe place and fuss like crazy over them. The Galahdians know Ardyn’s secret, even if they politely don’t tell this Ardyn that, so they come to believe an adapted version of the cover story.

-They think that Ardyn was never freed. That- that either the Vitae never managed to free him, or WORSE, judging by Nox’s answers to a few of their questions, Vitae, the first Vitae, Ardyn’s child, never survived to reach Galahd. Galahd had no magic. No one was left to Remember Ardyn. No one was left to SAVE HIM. They think that he was LEFT THERE for centuries upon centuries until NIFLHEIM found him, dragged him free and tormented him, used him. Forced some unknown name on him and humiliated him. Their Grandfather, their Sage, the heart of their history, Forgotten and stolen away, driven mad by the Kinslayer’s cruelties and Niflheim’s lies.

-They believe that Ardyn ... found Nox, an illegitimate LC child who was unknown to both Clan and Kinslayers, that even in his madness, the Sage’s Heart reached out to the boy and took him in, even if he treated him horribly at first because of his own traumas. They believe (not ... totally incorrectly) that Ardyn made up the story of Nox being his sister’s son so he’d have an excuse to keep Nox around, keep him SAFE and teach him magic. That it was Nox who tore Ardyn free of Niflheim’s web and has helped patch him together into the man they are meeting today.

-They internally seethe at Nox’s scars, his soft voice and wary flinches, because that leads to a lot of other theories on JUST WHAT his blood family was like to him before Ardyn Claimed him.

-Then Nox whispers of the refugee that took him into the Arra Clan, of a people scattered to the winds and forced to unite under the Kinslayer’s banner and service and all of Galahd WAILS at the realization that they HAD NO MAGIC WHEN NIFLHEIM CAME. THAT GALAHD IN THAT WORLD IS FALLEN because Mors pulled back the Wall and THEY HAD NO MAGIC TO RAISE THEIR OWN. 

 -Regis and Co hover in a nearby corner and Clarus has to physically hold Regis upright because his legs are jello and his heart is SCREAMING at the sight of a son who doesn’t know him, who glances at him with some sort of ... primal fear and regret and longing yet never dares come close or look at him for more than a minute. This child of HIS who wears an Arra braid but is so new to the Clan he barely knows what it means to be adopted. This boy who is covered in scars and underweight, who speaks softly and sometimes stares vacantly into the distance like he’s gotten lost inside his own head and can’t find his way back out.

-This boy who huddles into Ardyn’s side and calls him Uncle, clings to him like he is the only trusted anchor (and in another world, that is understandable, but this doesn’t look like a reaction to being in another world, this looks like HABIT and that means both Nox and Ardyn are so very, very alone.)

-They take the two to their Ardyn, because of course they do. Who better to figure out how to undo the dimensional travel (who best to know how to help these two lost souls who need family and are unaware of all they could have had but lost)?

-Nox and his Ardyn take one look at Sage Ardyn and freeze. They can feel the Scourge still lingering under his skin, weak as it is. Nox’s Ardyn recoils, something like primal terror in his gaze (don’t let it close don’t let it infect not-again-please-not-again) but Nox lunges, ripping free of his uncle’s grip to crash into the startled Sage, grabbing his hands and pulling with his magic. White starfire unspools from his soul, pushes against his skin until it turns to the color of ash and cracks form along his hands-arms-neck-face, like jagged lines of a poorly repaired piece of pottery, his magic gleaming through the cracks like he’s going to come apart under the strain.

-The Sage screams as Nox wraps his magic around what is left of the Scourge in his not-Uncle’s blood and burns it.

-Nox’s scream mingles with the Sage’s as the Scourge writhes into the air, seeking an escape, any escape, and fails. Black dissolves into nothing and Nox crumples, wheezing and shaking as his Ardyn finally snaps out of his horror and catches him before he can hit the ground. Sage Ardyn staggers, wild-eyed and in shock, but ... free. Cured. Clear. All of Galahd surges forward with a cry, worried for their Sage and outraged at the Kinslayer Child who attacked him but Sage Ardyn holds up a hand and they still.

-He stares, in terrible grief and knowing and understanding down at Nox, who isn’t entirely coherent anymore as he shakes and shivers in his Uncle’s arms, and whispers, “Chosen King of Crystal, Bringer of Dawn, Lost Child and Last of his Line.”

-”No,” snaps Nox’s uncle from where he clings to Nox, something desperate as blue eyes meet former-gold-now-blue, “No. He is Nox. Nox Izunia of the blood of Lucis Caelum. Eldest, but not only, son of Regis Lucis Caelum.” There’s something wild in Nox’s uncle’s gaze as he looks up at the Sage, like he’s trying to convey something without actually saying it in front of the assembled Clans, “He is my nephew. No more. No less.”

-And Sage Ardyn, who is suddenly purified, Sage Ardyn, who FELT all of Nox’s power and age and regrets and stubborn, fragile soul in those moments were the Scourge burned away from his veins, Sage Ardyn who saw time unspool and unwind in Nox’s soul and realized this boy is so much more than an illegitimate child (not illegitimate at all, just displaced, lost and cast out of his own fate and time by the power of his own stubbornness and a lot of magic) ... understands what his counterpart is saying.

-Don’t tell them.

-Let us stay secret. Let us stay safe.

-He bows his head in acquiescence and instructs the Clans to house them in the best lodgings they have to offer. To let Nox rest in privacy and peace with his Uncle, as thanks for what he just did. He looks Regis and then Aulea in eye, as if seeing something about them they cannot fathom, then smiles for the Clans and tells them He Is Free. Nox has finished what the Clans started.

-All the Clans celebrate for their Sage, but at the same time they Mourn for the two displaced souls they know they cannot keep. That they must return to their lonely dimension of fractured Clans and too-heavy secrets.

-Regis spends the week it takes them to return lingering nearby Nox and Ardyn, and two days in Ardyn rolls his eyes and invites the man to sit down with them already. Nox eyes this younger, earnest, unbroken Regis warily, but drinks in the time spent with him and Aulea (Nox’s mother, this woman is his MOTHER, if from another time and place).

-After they return home, Regis ... Regis spends a very long time walking the cliffs of Galahd, listening to the wind and ... thinking.

-”Your kid,” Nox had blurted right before they disappeared, his gaze snapping to Aulea and Regis with a strange sort of gleam in his eyes, “If- if you have a son- can you- name him Noctis?”

-”Not Nox?” Aulea had asked while clinging to Regis’s hand.

-Nox had smiled, too sad and fragile for someone so unbelievably strong in magic, “No,” he had answered “I don’t think Nox is going to exist in your world.” As as he faded from that reality, Regis just barely heard him finish-

-”And I hope he never has to.”

-Eventually Regis goes home, eventually he and Aulea do have a son. They name him Noctis.

-And a few years later, when Noctis is still just a child, Ramuh comes to Regis and Aulea while they watch their son sleep and tells them, soft and neutral, that Noctis will be the Chosen King.

-And they both stop breathing as they think of that moment, where the Sage named Nox King of Crystal and Bringer of Dawn. They think of a boy too old for his skin and with magic so strong it threatened to crack him open and turn him to ash and endlessly ropes of scars.

-They think of the words “And I hope he never has to.”

-And suddenly they understand.

-Regis turns to Ramuh, eyes glittering with magic and power and all the towering Rage of a father who has already seen the fate of his child, and rumbles with the power of the Storm, “No. Not my son.”

-Ramuh merely tilts his head, watching placidly as Bahamut’s chains of prophecy shudder and shake before his eyes, “The Scourge must be purified.”

-”Then we will do it. The Clans will rise for War,” snaps Aulea with static in her curls and lightning on her tongue, “The Clans will Rise and Rage and we will purify the Taint together. But Bahamut cannot have our son.”

-And Ramuh laughs softly, as the chains snap and dissolve into nothing before his Sight, and he feels Prophecy come unwound, “Then you have my Blessing to try. You and all who walk the Isles.”

(welp this got stupid long, but hope you enjoy!)

[milkyetoile]

Lift

Someone shared this amazing fanart by @johanirae and I just couldn't let the idea go. Thank you for giving permission to write this!

Please check out @johanirae‘s art--they’re all beautiful and inspiring! <3

I'll edit and add notes when I post on AO3 sometime this week. So many ideas, so little time!

---

"Lift home?" Crowley asked jauntily. Aziraphale would have replied immediately if he wasn't still feeling his unnecessary heart beating faster in his chest. Crowley probably assumed that he agreed.

But then, as the demon turned around and took a step, he stumbled forward.

“Crowley!”

Aziraphale immediately rushed to catch him, wrapping his arms around the demon’s shoulders and dropping the bag of books in his haste.

“My dear boy, are you quite all right?” he asked, his eyebrows furrowed in worry for his friend. At Crowley’s grunt and weak attempt to stand back up, the angel huffed in exasperation. “What am I saying, of course, you’re not all right. Is it your feet?”

Crowley let out a hiss and suddenly sprang up, once again hopping on one foot then the other. “Forgot, ooh--churchesss--whole lot is consssecrated--ow--” 

“Oh, dear.” Aziraphale glanced around, wringing his hands as he considered what he could do--

“Aha!” His eyes lit up as he remembered seeing a couple of humans in the park the other turned around and crouched slightly, leaning forward.

“Hop on my back, dear, let me carry you,” he said.

“What?” Crowley hissed again from behind him but didn’t come close. “Carry me?”

The angel refrained from rolling his eyes at the other’s disbelief, but it was a close thing. “Yes, Crowley, I can carry you until we reach your car. It’s the least I can do after all of your help.” When he heard nothing but the tapping of Crowley’s feet behind him, Aziraphale turned back around to stare at the demon beseechingly. “Please, Crowley. This is my fault--let me make it up to you, dear.”

Crowley threw his head back with a begrudging groan of, “Fine!” He waved a hand at him in a vague shooing motion. “Turn around, angel.”

Aziraphale beamed at him and resumed his previous position. He carefully steadied himself as Crowley unceremoniously draped his body on the angel’s back. The demon wrapped his arms around Aziraphale’s shoulders and hissed once more as he hitched his legs around the angel’s waist.

“Not too tight, dear,” Aziraphale bid, feeling for a moment like prey being constricted by one of those huge snakes. He miracled the bag of books back into his hand’s grip then carefully hooked his arms under Crowley’s knees. “Just put your weight on me.”

He wondered if he had subconsciously miracled his voice to remain steady with how his heart felt like jumping out of his chest once more. He felt his face flush as he became acutely aware of every point of contact between them. He knew that he really did not need to feel these very human reactions, but they existed nonetheless. It was quite distracting--he had no idea how humans dealt with this in their short lives.

“Right.” He cleared his throat and pointedly ignored the feeling of Crowley slumping against him, his chin settling on Aziraphale's left shoulder. “Shall we?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Crowley grumbled, his warm breath brushing against Aziraphale’s left ear. “You better have some good alcohol ready, angel. I feel like I could drink a whole barrel after this."

"Really, my dear, that would be too much." Aziraphale carefully wove his way around the debris, now concentrating on bringing them away from the area. "But, as a matter of fact, I do have a few bottles of red of Châteaux Mouton-Rothschild. Philippe de Rothschild had this remarkable idea of bottling their own vintage."

Crowley hummed and tilted his head, the brim of his hat hitting the side of Aziraphale's forehead. "Too bad the Germans got their vineyard, huh? I bet you had something to do with him getting released from the Vichy."

"Perhaps I did," the angel said a bit smugly. "He was quite the nice fellow. Pity about his family though, dreadful business with the Germans."

"This whole war'ssss a dreadful businessss you mean."

"Well, quite right."

As they approached the end of the lot, he felt a bit of disappointment--which was as ridiculous as his corporation's reactions to, well, everything related to Crowley right now. He cleared his throat needlessly. "Almost there."

Crowley let out another hum but otherwise didn't respond. He tightened his grip around Aziraphale's shoulders for a moment then relaxed with a sigh.

"Are you alright there, Crowley?" Aziraphale asked, a bit worried. "Are your feet hurting, my dear?"

"Sss'fine," Crowley grumbled, his words beginning to slur. "Ssssleepy…warm…"

Aziraphale felt warmth suffuse his chest, a fond expression crossing his features. "Please don't sleep just yet, Crowley. I'm afraid I have no idea how to drive your car."

"S'fine," the demon repeated, sounding more coherent now but still tired. "I'll ssstay awake."

Aziraphale felt guilty now. Clearly, Crowley exhausted himself already, and his feet were probably aching, if not burnt. He deserved to rest.

"Actually, perhaps if you would permit," the angel began tentatively as they approached the Bentley, which was parked across the street. "I could let it drive itself, so you can take a nap on the way."

Crowley made an affronted noise. "You'd make it drive at five milesss per hour."

"Don't be ridiculous, Crowley." He stopped by the passenger seat and bade it open. "In you go." He gently manoeuvred the demon into the seat. He placed the bag of books on the floor in front of the seat and patted the top.

"Feet on top now, dear boy. You probably have burns on them. I'm afraid I can't heal them with my powers, as you know, injuries from holy objects."

Crowley stared at him in silence, making him want to fidget.

"I hope you'd let me take care of them when we get to the bookshop though," he added with uncertainty, feeling quite exposed for some reason.

"You want me to put my feet up on your precious books?" Crowley asked incredulously, his hissing absent now that he seemed more awake. "The same books I just saved for you?"

Aziraphale felt like his heart jumped to his throat at the reminder, which was quite preposterous. He steeled himself with an indignant huff, hoping to appear firm.

"You are clearly hurt, and I won't have you hurting yourself further by having your feet hitting the carpet."

He stepped back and closed the door, moving to the driver's side. By the time he was settled in the driver's seat, Crowley had already put his feet up as instructed and removed his hat.

"They'll be fine, you know," the demon mumbled, looking down at his feet. "No need to hurt your precious books."

Aziraphale hadn't thought he'd feel more fond of his friend after earlier but he was clearly feeling it now.

"My dear." Very carefully, he placed a hand on Crowley's cheek, startling the demon into looking at him. "Your feet are infinitely more precious than some old books."

He watched as Crowley's jaw dropped, his cheeks unexpectedly turning a lovely shade of red. Aziraphale felt his own face warm at the sight, his heart racing once more.

Confound this human body.

He dropped his hand and looked away, clearing his throat.

"The books are protected by the bag anyway," he said with attempted nonchalance. "Shall we get on then?" He fixed his gaze on the steering wheel even as he heard the other sigh.

"Yeah, sure." Aziraphale glanced back at him, watching him get comfortable for a moment. "Let's get on with it."

"Right." He willed the car to start, bidding it to drive them to the bookshop. "Off we go then."

The Bentley started up, headlights coming on and moving on its own. As it sped through the streets, the radio turned on, filling the car with Vivienne Segal's voice.

"I'm wild again, beguiled again,

A simpering, whimpering child again

Bewitched, bothered, and bewildered am I…"

---

A/N: I know Bewitched, Bothered, and Bewildered record didn’t come out until the 1950′s even though the song was introduced in the 1940 musical Pal Joey. I’m just gonna say the Bently Does What It Wants. You know, this gives me another idea..........

Will eventually repost this in AO3 with actual notes. Idk I wanna try book format with the notes and I have stuff to add anyway.

Let me know what you guys think! Please feel free to send me ideas or prompts. I’d love to discuss and maybe write them out. This fandom is just so inspiring.

[convenientalias]

Ask me: FANDOM EDITION - A, O, X, Z

A-Current OTP

Already answered, but, maybe Carlottastine or R/C? Idk.

O-Choose a song at random, what OTP does it remind you of?

Well, I shuffled my playlist and got “Belle to Remember” by Hayley Kiyoko, which I haven’t heard in a while. Honestly? I always associated this song more with my original fiction than anything else. Hayley Kiyoko was my muse for the “murderous college roommate” novel that I finished writing last summer, so she brings two ships to mind-- my MC and her murderous college roommate, and my MC and the cute butch girl downstairs.

Since no one knows those ships except me and my irl friends, I went on and the next song was “Opheliac” by Emilie Autumn. Which is a jam, but not one I really associate with a particular ship. The song after that, tho, was “Material Girl” by Madonna, which I associate with Eva/Tenma from Monster as well as Carlotta, just, in general. I can stretch it to be a Carlotta/Christine song if I picture Carlotta explaining her life philosophies to Christine while Christine listens with an expression of either awed naivete or slight disgust.

Man, I should write some fics based on songs some time soon. that would be fun.

X-3 OTPs from three different fandoms.

Great Gatsby--Nick/Gatsby

Shades of Magic--Kell/Holland

How to Get Away With Murder--Wes/Annalise

Z-Just ramble about something fan-related, go go go

Ummmmmmmmmm hm I’m gonna ramble about my odd current books situation, which I figure is close enough.

So I usually read a lot of f/f books, and I read a few m/m books, and obviously some books that aren’t queer at all. But lately I’ve been having such bad luck with f/f books. In the past two months, I’ve finished six, which is a lot, but apart from Alpennia, they’ve all been just ok. kind of meh. That book I got so excited about the other day which I bought off ebay turned out to be kind of shit. I read a book by an author I really enjoy that turned out to be largely kind of boring. Another one struck me as actually kind of biphobic, and then there were two others that were just kind of eh. I’ve also DNF’ed probably twice as many books as I’ve finished.

Meanwhile I’ve discovered the most amazing m/m mystery series (Criminal Intentions by Cole McCade) and I’m reading Mary Renault novels for a school project, which is bringing my ratio of good m/m books WAY up. ...not actually that high up, but I’ve also read 6 m/m books in the past two months. Which makes it equal to the number of f/f books, actually, but for me, that’s very weird bc in original fiction I usually don’t read a lot of m/m. And while my f/f books have been meh, pretty much ALL of those six m/m books have been amazing. Admittedly this is largely bc I’m just reading two very good authors--maybe if I could find a couple f/f authors that I ALWAYS love, I would be in better luck. As of now, I have some authors I generally like, but none I’m quite so emphatically into except maybe Heather Rose Jones, who only has written three books so. Once I’ve read her most recent book, I’ll be out of luck.

It’s really hard sometimes to find good f/f books! The fact is, bc f/f is an underappreciated genre, many reviewers and promoters of f/f praise basically all books in the genre, and it’s hard to find books that are objectively good as opposed to “it must be good bc it has lesbians in it”. Then again, is there such a thing as an objectively good book, or is it all just taste? And is this partly my fault for mostly just reading whatever books I can get for free or cheap or through the library?

Anyways this is just me out in the weeds wondering if the reason all this annoys me is bc of genre snobbery (feeling like I should enjoy f/f more than m/m) or whether it’s a legitimate gripe. ...at any rate I know my genre enjoyment comes and goes in waves. at some point I’ll probably stop reading much queer fiction at all. but not for quite a while, I hope!

this has been a long-ass post for a simple ask. Thanks for the ask! If anyone has thoughts on my not very coherent rant, I’m up for discussion.

[fizzingwizard]

I started this on my lunch break, still gotta rewatch to be coherent but wanted to put down some bullet points of Feelings!!!

The bottom line is I did like Bokura no Mirai, because I think the Tri writers are good, BUT I think half of the issues in BoM were their hands being tied by the limited time left, and the other half simply planning way too much. Both are amateur mistakes and yet anime movies routinely make them, so I’m not as strict as I should be.

As an aside, my personal theory for this movie was that Taichi would let the two worlds merge. I thought he was going to shock everyone by choosing not to stop it, letting the worlds merge sans reboot, and that would result in humans and digimon living in harmony. It’s an unfinished theory obviously, since it supposes a different outcome of the merge than Yggdrasil believes will happen, and also because even if the world was fine after, we’d lose the future where there are two worlds and Taichi needs to be an ambassador between them. But that’s what I was expecting, something of that nature anyway, let’s say. I suppose I’m overly influenced by Tsubasa Chronicle lol.

k now for some highs and lows!!!

HIGHS

TAKERU, MAGNAANGEMON AND DEVIMON!!!! There is NOTHING like Takeru angst. omg. Not for me anyway. No other character’s trauma hit me the way Takeru still carries the burden of what happened to his partner in their very first boss battle.

People predicted Nishijima’s death but I did NOT. I thought of course he was going to be reunited with Himekawa. So this will figure in my “lows” section as well, but as for his apparent death itself, I was moved. But it’s also totally unfair and it’s more of a low than a high for Reasons. But it still deserves a mention here.

Mimi telling Meiko (and the others) to stop blaming themselves. I like Meiko, I do, but I was really annoyed with her when Hikari was feeling guilty and Meiko just had to feel guilty for that. It’s par for the course with her, and I was really defensive of her last movie - I think it was the way it felt like she was using Hikari’s distress to vent her own feelings that bothered me this time around. That being said, I certainly empathize with her and with Hikari, and I’m glad Mimi was so nice and caring about it. (Her line would have been perfectly suited to Sora - our Mimi is growing up!)

The cute moments with the Digimon - glad we still got some of those.

Yamato and Gabumon’s conversation on the balcony was UGH. So great. They’re probably my favorite partner relationship since Adventure. It was so IC and so perfect. I could cry at how sweet and sensitive and full of resilience Gabumon was. Just like his partner.

Also Yamato’s heartbreak over Taichi was sOOOO strong!! And then we they reunite he’s just like, “You’re late.” And you know what I thought of? Rini in the dub Sailor Moon movie. Hahahaha. I had actually hopped for a sweet moment between Taichi and Yamato but... well they stared at each other dramatically for a while, I guess that counts *cough*

KOUSHIROU was MAGIC. Part of me is like “fake science is fake!” but the other part is like “lol but if anyone could make fake science real it’d be Koushirou!” I love that, even when the others weren’t being forward about rejecting the reboot, and Yamato even implied that if Taichi thought it was the way to spare the most sacrifices he would do it, Koushirou was the one who emphatically said “NO!”

Hikari and everything about her. I love that she told Taichi she might not be able to forgive him. And I love that she said “thats why i’m going to fight alongside you.” And her expression during that last battle. It was the same determined look as Taichi’s. There are still a billion questions about her and Meiko as well, why what happened happened, maybe on second viewing I’ll understand more, but... I think it’s mostly “digimon lore” stuff that may never get explained.

Taichi’s phone call to Meiko at the end and the way the other kids acted. Of course I always love flustered and embarrassed Taichi. For the first time, I thought I could ship Meichi after the way Taichi called her and then did nothing but grunt and made her do all the work of carrying the conversation herself xD That boy is hopeless!

Also, Taichi in general. I’m still..... not quite sure what happened. Not quite sure what the takeaway is supposed to be. He was rescued by Nishijima after Yggdrasil’s life or death survival game, and came back to the real world... and chose to kill Meicoomon. In Kyousei, I was sad but on board because there did not appear to be any other day. I didn’t know what they’d do in Bokura no Mirai. Finales are often the age of miracles,  but on the other hand, as much as I wanted Meicoomon to reunite with Meiko, it would have been so underwhelming if everything just went back to normal with no sacrifices (oh yeah, Nishijima). So mixed feelings on how things played out. But one thing I do know is that I loved Taichi the entire time. I love that he’s not a straight up hero. He can do things that make his little sister say she’ll never forgive him. And he can be the kindest bravest person around. Right or wrong, I can’t help but like him.

LOWS

One thing - a lot of my lows result from things that went unanswered or at least I didn’t understand it last night. 

The story quite simply does not feel complete. It’s not even a feeling - it isn’t complete. What the hell was Yggdrasil’s comments about Daemon and whatever at the end. A joke? I didn’t really get the feeling. Was that dark cube some variety of dark spore? Or the one from Adventure? Also, we don’t get to find out what happened to real Gennai (or did I just miss it)? Up till now I never believed it was really him... maybe that was wishful thinking... but why tho

Taichi’s character development arc. He got a LOT. And I do love it overall, but I’m not quite sure I understand it. I suppose the simple answer is, he’s going to be an ambassador, and an ambassador needs to be able to negotiate, to see things in shades of gray, and (ok waxing poetical here but) to understand that life and death are a balance. Idk. I’m a Star Trek fan, “the needs of the one outweigh the needs of the many” usually results in intergalactic shenanigans to steal whales from a different time. And who doesn’t love that?

Part of me just needed more... Idk, closure I suppose? about Meiko and Meicoomon after everything they went through. I wanted Meiko to be a bigger character in the finale movie. I’m surprised by that since I wasn’t warm to her in the beginning, but it feels wrong that in the end, all she got was a sweet farewell. It was very sweet! And heartbreaking! And I’m not exactly angry that Meicoomon was lost, but after 5 movies leading up to it, it just felt... i dunno, it lacked the sense of relief I was looking for. (However, I sometimes feel these things differently on rewatch. This is a scene I’ll be looking out for.)

The 02 gang’s been missing... like the said in Saikai. OK fine. Why didn’t the kids ever try to contact them beyond that one visit to Ken’s house?? Why weren’t they concerned that none of them were like “Hello, we heard digimon are raising hell, can we help?” That is the question folks. Tri definitely did NOT need more characters to juggle, but heck, “they’re all camping in a remote island with no electricity!” would have been a better excuse for why no one notices they’re not around.

Daigo’s death. Like I said, it was a hero’s death, and for that it was awesome. But a lot of the reasons why it was awesome were inferences. Like, Taichi was just like “whoa?” when nishijima was like “oh yeah maki’s disappeared she lost her mind searching for her dead partner.” This should have been way bigger news. I don’t see why they wouldn’t be intensely curious about their predecessors - yeah big world shaking battle is gonig on so I get it not being on the back burner, but it was totally just shoehorned in. No thank you! Daigo deserved better.

MAKI DIDN’T EVEN APPEAR. I had been so worried about her but I thought the worst that would happen would be she’d do something to redeem herself and die! But nope! She’s not there AT ALL. And Daigo’s DEAD! Honestly it wouldn’t be SO bad if we could be sure this wasn’t the end... because it just feels like there’s so much story left to tell, including theirs. The Original Chosen in Tri are more like a summary of “a fanfic I’d like to write someday.” Better to just not have included them. Found some different way to cause the reboot. They were treated worse in the end than the 02 kids, frankly.

one last quibble... Essentially no Taishiro. :( :( :( I mean just platonic moments. Just one would have been good! Oh well.

i’m totally leaving things out but that’s all I’ve got for the moment. rewatch imminent

[convenientalias]

Yuletide Rec List

Y’all there are 3365 fandoms in the Yuletide noms and some of them are really good so I thought I’d just make a promo post here and also rant a little bc I’m excited even tho it’s barely October just looking at this list.

So I’m gonna put the rest of this barely coherent ranting under a read more but like guys, I’m excited.

So here goes. Some fandom recs!

Books

The Alpennia Trilogy by Heather Rose Jones

Mistress/bodyguard ship in the first book, which leads to so many possibilities! Loyalty kink! Power imbalance! All that shit!

Amazing worldbuilding and magic mixed in with religion

I’ve only read the first book but I’m totally gonna request it

Best for femslash fic tbh, but I guess you could do gen.

The Shades of Magic series by V.E. Schwab

Again the worldbuilding is good. But the series is overall very dark. Also, an ensemble kind of feel.

My ship is two powerful magicians who seem to be the last of their kind, both working for royal families, one of whom lives as a prince and the other of whom is enslaved.

They’re enemies most of the time but still.

But a lot of people ship other things bc ensemble cast. There is one canon m/m ship. There is a slightly OP female crossdressing thief. There’s angsty brothers. There’s lots of people basically.

Good fandom for m/m, f/m, gen, even poly. Very good fandom for dark fic or whump imo.

Peter Darling by Austin Chant

Trans Peter Pan who used to be Wendy Darling

Ship is Peter Pan/Captain Hook

Writing style is gorgeous

Captures the cruel, childlike side of Peter Pan.

Good fandom for slash mostly, but I imagine you could pull off gen too.

Nero Wolfe series by Rex Stout

Detectives in New York in some vaguely historical time period.

Narrator is Archie Goodwin, very snarky and charming, one of my favorite characters of all time.

All the mysteries are fun but you’re mostly here for the dynamics between Archie, Nero Wolfe himself, and all the other regular members in the series--the detectives sometimes brought in to help out, the house cook, the pissed-off policemen, etc etc.

Also totally fine to read out of order, I’ve never really paid much attention to the order myself. Includes both novels and novellas.

A lot of people write slash in this fandom; I don’t really ship any slash ships for it (I’m kind of a gen bitch here) but I admit the potential is there.

Queen’s Thief series by Megan Whalen Turner

Technically YA fantasy but I’d say it’s not that firmly YA except for the first book.

Land of twists and intrigue with the occasional questing adventure. Pseudo-Greek setting.

Includes one of my favorite f/m ships for which I long for more dark fic.

Surprisingly active fandom, I am nowhere near caught up on the fanfic for the last book published.

Good fandom for het, slash, occasionally poly, and very good for GEN (sorry, the MC’s name is Gen and I couldn’t resist).

Goblin Market by Christina Rosetti

Idk why there’s a fandom nomination for a poem but I guess I’ll go with it, it’s a good poem.

Very ripe for femslash tho technically the MCs are sisters (but do they read like sisters? No, no they do not) so you might have to go AU for it.

Kind of dark and weird but childlike at the same time.

Movies/TV Shows/Anime/Literally Anything But Books

Kakegurui (anime/manga)

I’ve only watched the anime but I hear the manga is good.

Crazy high school obsessed with gambling gets even crazier when Yumeko the gambling freak shows up just to start drama.

Weirdly dark even tho nothing life threatening really happens. Ridiculously grotesque facial expressions on absolutely everyone.

Very good for femslash, decent for het and poly. You could probably write gen. But how.

Kado: The Right Answer (anime)

It’s sci-fi show that’s half about contact with aliens and half about the unhealthy relationship between an alien and his favorite human. And when I say half I mean “gets really dark in the last third”. But if you’re mostly interested in that part, it’s short enough that you still get there pretty quick.

I really just want dark slash fic, that’s all guys.

Two Faces of January (movie)

This is also a book by Patricia Highsmith but I nominated the movie bc it has Oscar Isaac and Viggo Mortensen.

Dark thriller vibes

Slashy vibes with weird daddy kink overtones (it can’t be helped, and this remains constant whether it’s book or movie)

Somehow I still ship it despite not really liking daddy kink.

Just trust me

Singin’ In the Rain

I’m really hoping this was nominated by someone who wants OT3 fic.

That’s all.

Gattaca

If you don’t already know about Gattaca are you even following me

It has Jude Law in it

Also it explores dystopian ableism and yet has an oddly ableist ending which consistently PISSES ME OFF, which is why I always request fix-it fic.

People really like slash for this movie and I get it but I don’t really ship it but a lot of people do so if you watch it, you will probably ship it too.

Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell

British miniseries which I somehow like despite not liking most BBC shows. (Seriously, my roommate and sister have both tried to get me into Sherlock and Dr. Who and I just can’t, good for y’all who like such things tho.)

I’m mostly here for the fae aspects and one of the MCs being traumatized and descending into insanity.

But the aesthetic is also pretty rad.

 Harlots

It’s about harlots. Kind of Victorian? I think? Idk time periods guys.

It portrays sex and sex workers in interesting, pretty down to earth ways.

It’s a good place for femslash but I somehow find myself craving gen.

The aesthetic is strong.

Luke Cage

I’ve still only seen the first season but it was rad

A lot of black people, guys

Also superhero-y things

Probably best for het, tbh, tho I would slash ship Luke with Cornell. Why doesn’t anyone seem to ship that?

Sakeru Gum

It’s like a five minute commercial compilation that will change your life.

I’ve probably reblogged it at some point. Otherwise, search it on Youtube.

Loooong looooong mAAaaaaan

Fandoms I’m Not Actually In But Might Join If The Prompts Look Good

There’s a couple different books nommed by Mary Renault! I’m reading the Alexander Trilogy right now (Alexander the fuckign Great, guys), which is nommed, so if things work out I might write for that. There’s also The Last of the Wine and Mask of Apollo.

Also, there are two series nominated that are by K.J. Charles. I’ve only ever read The Henchmen of Zenda by K.J. Charles but that was really good, so I may have to try one of these series out. Of course, I’d have to actually have time, and series are a bit lengthy for me this semester! But I might read a book or two if the prompts look excellent.

Someone nominated Learning Curves by Ceillie Simkiss? Which is an indie lesfic romance novella which was published only this August. I’m shocked it somehow ended up in the tagset and very curious about prompts. But I haven’t actually read this book, I’ve just heard of it.

The Caper Court series by Caro Fraser sounds interesting, too. It’s about a guy trying to become a lawyer who needs to fulfill a pupillage first, whatever the fuck that is, but apparently there’s gay people and intrigue, so I’m interested. I’ve started the first book.

Also, Zorro by Isabel Allende is nominated. I’ve never read this book but I’ve always wanted to because I love Zorro--the old TV show was one of my favorites as a kid. But I’ve never read a literary take on it.

If I can watch the Kdrama for Orange Marmalade, I’m interested in that too. I’ve only ever read the webmanga, didn’t know it was a live action now. It’s got vampires :) and high school drama.

So this rant was kind of unnecessary, but I just have a lot of feelings, guys, okay? Just...a lot of feelings...