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barbariccia · 4 years

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it’s time to talk about Hydaelyn.

i’ve been sat on this theory for a long time - i’m pretty sure i didn’t come up with the original idea myself, but the more i think about it the more it makes sense to me. i’m not sure HOW it’ll come into play in the story, necessarily, but the new year’s eve poem posted last night has me rubbing my chin even more. so:

Hydaelyn exists under Silvertear Lake and i won’t hear no for an answer.

(please note there'll be spoilers for 5.0.)

we have known since 1.0 that there’s Something Under Silvertear. admittedly, in 1.0 it was likely just Midgardsormr, because the times have been a-changing and while the dev team has done a truly admirable job at building on what lore remained from the 1.X days, they couldn’t and didn’t keep everything intact. i do not at any point consider this a downside, just something worth noting!

the Garleans, headed by Gaius van Baelsar (acting under solus-selch’s orders), after the invasion and successful annexing of Ala Mhigo, pushed into Mor Dhona as the next part of their “invade Eorzea” project as a central location that would make continued pushes into the land easy. not only that, but Mor Dhona is noted as being (and has been since 1.X) the center of aetherial connections in Eorzea, if not the whole world, though Eorzea is particularly topped up with aether compared to other landmasses. Cid Garlond in his 1.X iteration suggests that Mor Dhona is where aether returns to rejoin the Lifestream. Quote:

Cid nan Garlond: All aether would - should pass through Silvertear Lake upon returning to the Land, but it now appears that something is bending the energy's course - drawing it away.

in 1.X, Nael van Darnus was originally drawing Dalamud down to fall on this area, where Castrum Novum (now Castrum Centri in ARR and beyond) was built, until adventurers put a stop to that and the transmitter was relocated to Coerthas, where the Rivenroad was ripped from. I’ll accept it as a happy coincidence - the castra was built in this area, it makes sense for plot events to happen there - but it does strike me as interesting, especially where the parallel between the Garlean’s Meteor Project and the original Meteor from FFVII is concerned. Sephiroth wasn’t just calling down a giant slab of asteroid for shiggles; he was doing it specifically to create a wound in the Planet that would require an immense amount of energy to heal that he could siphon off of and become a god. If XIV’s Meteor had hit (and not hatched like an egg), a similar thing might have happened.

And there’s no better place to call a lot of aether to the fore than somewhere entirely rich in it. Almost like there’s a great being in that area dependent on aether that directs the Lifestream through itself to preserve not only itself, but all life on the planet.

The second the Garleans got too close to the lake, Middy burst out with a whole host of Dravanians and the Battle of Silvertear Skies began (and ended with Dravanian victory at great cost). This sequence from 1.X is notable as being one of those things that has to have been changed from ARR onwards considering what we now know about primal summoning (they weren’t just ‘let loose’ into the world, they’ve been actively taught to certain peoples (though why only ‘now’ and not ‘before, too’ is still up in the air)) - not to mention we know that the Echo started manifesting after the battle, too, almost as though something felt like it was in danger and needed thralls (1) to protect itself - but Middy came out to protect something. He’d been known as the great protector of Silvertear Lake for a very long time, since he first appeared to the source. Quote The Rising Chorus, from patch 2.5:

Minfilia: [...] an unlikely ally came to Eorzea's aid that day─Midgardsormr, legendary guardian of Silvertear Falls, burst forth from beneath the waters of the lake and led a host of dragons against the Garlean airships overhead.

Minfilia: Midgardsormr was once worshipped as the guardian deity of Silvertear Falls [...]

Minfilia: One of the ancient myths regarding Silvertear Falls states that when the waters came into existence, so too did the great wyrm. Althyk and Nymeia, Brother Time and Sister Fate, decreed that Midgardsormr ever watch over the source, from which all water─and magic─was said to flow. I wonder... What if this was the covenant of which he spoke, and 'twas not the gods with whom he treated, but Hydaelyn Herself?

minfy and ourselves can only guess as to the nature of the covenant forged between hydaelyn and midgardsormr. Following the Omega questline, we know that Midgardsormr fled the Dragonstar with his seven eggs to get away from Omega, crossing the vast expanse of space at great cost to his own personal strength. We don’t know at what time Midgardsormr appeared to the Source - whether it was before, during, or after the time of the 13th Reflection being turned into the Void as we know it - but it would have been post-Sundering of the Ancient world, considering he was able to make a pact with Hydaelyn at all (2) (not to mention there’s no dragons on the First; if there were dragons everywhere we’d know they were reflections of the First Brood! i’m still angy there’s no Azdaja and Vrtra. fucking PLEASE squenix i’m DYING for info on them).

(1) this is a good a place as any to mention that in 1.X, Minfilia - then known as Ascilia - witnessed the Battle of Silvertear Falls with her father Warburton and her Echo awoke a few years later. interesting to think that the primal that tempered Ascilia in potential desperation would later scour her clean and use her for its own purposes, though i know this wasn’t intentional from the devs at all as a plot-point.

(2) the nature of Hydaelyn and Zodiark’s battle makes me doubt that there was much time between Her summoning and the Sundering of the world

There’s an interview from 2014/15 with Koji Fox where he notes, quote,"There's a presence [at Silvertear]. It wasn't just Midgardsormr there, it was more of a force[...]". There’s definitely something there that isn’t just the dragons. Something big. It’s Hydaelyn!!! It has to be. (highlights in the excerpt mine.)

My interpretation of this event is that Midgardsormr agreed to protect the physical ‘body’ of Hydaelyn in exchange for the safety of his eggs - the First Brood - which is what he’s been doing for potentially upwards of 10,000 years. The battle at Silvertear is pretty explosive otherwise for what’s effectively a non-event. There might not have been dragons in Gyr Abania, or in Ilsabard, or Othard or anywhere else they’ve been pushing into - but there’s never been any indication of the dragons being particularly territorial. The Dravanians shared their space with proto-Ishgardians back in the day, and their issues with the elezen of the Source was due to some choice eye-vorage, not encroaching on lands like the sahagin and kobolds.

As for Hydaelyn’s physical form - well, it’s known that Zodiark has a physical form which was sealed directly into the moon. The true moon, known to us colloquially as Menphina (3) (is there another name for it? i haven’t seen anything). It stands to reason that Hydaelyn has a physical form as well, then, hidden away somewhere safe, because as we known, primals can be defeated and their essences scattered to return back to the Lifesteam.

(3) Hey, it’s worth noting here that Menphina, the Lover (whose divine stone is parked right where Haurchefant’s grave is) is said to be the younger sister of Azeyma, the Warden! and boy, while we’re thinking about the misremembered names of the Convocation coming back as names of gods in modern day, what significance does that have?

The Antitower: In all of creation, what greater mystery could there be than the fate of this very star? To sound the deepest depths, to study the aetherial sea itself─for these purposes and more was the Antitower built. Abandoned by her Sharlayan caretakers following the exodus, it has since been overrun by the magical guardians they left behind. Yet were one blessed with Her gift to brave these dangers and descend to the furthest reaches─to hear, feel, and think at the heart of this world─what would they find?

(emphasis mine.)

in the cutscenes following the Antitower, we meet Hydaelyn in the aetherial sea, and Her mouthpiece, the Word of the Mother. and by using the Antitower, something specifically Sharlayan-built, no less. I’d be very interested to know if you can reach the aetherial sea from only the Forelands, where that dungeon is, or from anywhere. I’m gonna make a stab at anywhere.

It’s been brought to my attention that in the cutscenes post-Antitower, Hydaelyn mentions in the quest The Word of the Mother (patch 3.2), and Ardbert echoes later in Shadows of the First (patch 3.4) that “across ten and three were [we] then divided, reflections of the source, each possessed of a shard”, which seems to imply that not only the people of the world and Zodiark, but also Hydaelyn Herself was sundered and became weaker in so doing. which is FANTASTICALLY interesting, all things considered! maybe She wasn’t just becoming weak (and finding it harder to take mouthpieces and the like) because of the land’s aether being drained by primals (and other sources).

The just-released (as of time of writing) New Year’s Eve poem makes me think that the “last chapter of this story” might relate back to this in some way.

[EN]

Our progeny may never know Wherefore we look unto the sky Nor why we dig for truth below; We bear their scorn or watch them die.

[FR]

With our mouths closed, we pile stone upon stone, To form a staircase leading to the lands of knowledge, As well as another pointing to the heavens of existence. Our children will remember it, no matter how angry they are.

[GR]

Committed to our silent office We seek wisdom in the deep earth. Put tomorrow in starry hands, Sung by children's lamentations.

[JP]

By staying silent and saying naught, we will not accumulate the crystals(?) (4) To gain knowledge, we climb into the earth, To survive, we climb to into the heavens. Even if our progeny resent us, it is all for their sake.

(4) 石 meaning stone rather than ‘crystals’, 水晶 meaning ‘crystal’ (and used in the JP title of the Crystal Exarch).

*** translations from THIS reddit post and THIS tweet for the EU and JP translations of the poem, respectively.

something something 6.0 is looking more likely to be Sharlayan than anywhere else, something something big tower something something learn stuff from within the earth. c’moooon, i wanna go beat some answers out of crystal mom. walk freeeee indeed.

Getting away from the poems again and back to Stuff On The Source, we can take a look at the First, a much more pristine reflection of the Source due to having no Calamities happen to it ever. The Source (not to be confused with the Source), the equivalent of Silvertear, is being presided over by none other than... Bismarck, a member of the fae (and BOY i’d like to know more about whaleboi in this world!!!!), in exactly the same position Midgardsormr is, presumably protecting something of equal importance. Having said that, I don’t know if by splitting the world, Hydaelyn also split Herself.

Having said that, there’s an environmental anomaly in that area. Fly out to Bismarck’s (5) nose, and then dive under the waves. There’s a crystal formation coming out of the ground that can’t be found anywhere else on the First - there is nothing else similar to this formation - that has patches of light emitting from bits of it. A friend of mine noted that the way it seems to be coming through in only this location is almost cancerous in origin - that is to say, uncontained and Wrong in some manner, more complex than we have words or knowledge of. The only way you can interact with these crystals is in the level 78 mining levequest Crystal Meds, which notes that you can yank salt crystals out of that formation... but it seems a little too suspect to leave as ‘just salt’.

(5) Speaking of Bismarck, from that earlier interview with Koji Fox, he also has this to say, which... what else have you been hiding in plain sight... (highlights again mine.)

Or the Crystarium’s just going around seasoning their meals with primal mama, who knows.

Eep, this post got away from me. Anyway, i’m not really sure what to DO with any of this information. as many of my friends know i’ve been harping on about this for years at this point, and i’m not the best at speculation and guessing accurately where stories end up going - but it feels more right than ever to talk about it now after that poem was release.

hells, maybe they’ll give us another tower. say... a tower of bab-il, to take us to the moon? 6.0 FFIV expansion pretty please??

#ffxiv speculation #ffxiv #hydaelyn #final fantasy 14 #ff14

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phoenotopia · 4 years

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The Last Phoenotopia Blog Update

(Date 2021 MAR 01)

I debated how to open this blog post, but perhaps the main crux of this blog post is the best place to start. The blog is being retired.

The purpose of this blog was to be a "development" blog for Phoenotopia, and well, Phoenotopia's development is done. I'll still be doing bug fixes and maintenance on the PC and Switch versions, and playstation and xbox ports are underway (by a publisher). But I'm not going to be making any more major changes to the game. At some point, you put the paintbrush down and say it's done. Blemishes and all.

Recent Events

The game launched on Steam last month, and like any launch, it was hectic. Bugs Galore. This is our first commercial PC launch, so it was a real baptism by fire. Unlike Switch's one configuration, the PC has multiple configurations and factors to account for. The game needed to be able to handle multiple control schemes, screen resolutions, refresh rates, and more! I had a 60Hz monitor going into launch and didn't know anything about Hz (I do now). There was a troublesome stutter that some players were sensitive to that my whole team didn't notice since our eyes compensated it away. There were a few times where in fixing something at one party's behest, it introduced problems for another party. A few times, due to disorganization, I unwittingly rolled back a fix that was meant to be applied. For some, the game couldn't play at all (really glad Steam allows refunds).

It was messy. It was tiring. I.AM.BEAT.

I think the worst of it is over... I'll still be around to do the last updates and bug fixes, but I'm ultimately ready for what's next.

SO what is next?

What isn't next... is Phoenotopia 2. As you may have heard down the grapevine, the game couldn't be what you call successful. No one's earned even minimum wage on it.

Maybe there's hope in the game's long tail. A year or two down the line... maybe. I won't hold my breath though. At some point in the past few months, I finished processing (or grieving) and it's time to move on.

The game has at least earned enough for us to continue our modest operations. As long as we don't expand the team, and we don't take another monster six-year dev cycle like what Phoenotopia took, we can continue. We'll have to be smarter and faster. Perhaps the most valuable thing we gained from all this is experience.

The Experience

It is a dev blog. Here are some of the lessons I've accumulated from this game's development.

- Have a good menu design. Menus aren't just that in-between fluff before you get to the good stuff. Menus are KEY. Your menus need to be robust, expandable, and *understandable* (to you, the developer). Because once the game's out, you will invariably be asked to add more options. And if your menu design is bad, every time you have to add a new menu option, it becomes a whole new pain all over again. Support mouse from the get-go, etc.

- Focus on features that people will actually care about. For instance, I've never seen anyone praise the camera's zoom feature. In practice, people try that feature a few times and then never use it again. But that feature was a constant consideration factor for every level. Run through it multiple times to make sure the level didn't break, think about which zoom levels made sense, resize rooms because they worked at one zoom level but not the other, and so on.

- Don't do boxes that you can move around. Other 2D platformers avoid movable boxes because they're a huge headache to program and they really complicate the game space. Enemies need to respond to boxes you throw in their path and either navigate around or attack it. When you're moving the box, you have to worry about constantly changing your collision size and reconciling when the box gets snagged on the environment. The boxes were also a constant source of bugs because people can manipulate them to soft-lock themselves and more.

- More focused script. Phoenotopia's 100,000+ word script was panned more for being bloated than it was praised for being lengthy. Long scripts take a long time to write and make the game more unwieldy, increasing the costs of translation and upkeep. Every update we're addressing some textual error or mistranslation. There are some highly renowned games (e.g. Hyper Light Drifter) that do without a script at all!

- Be flashy! A bat and a lightsaber take the same amount of work to program, but the lightsaber will draw a lot more attention and interest.

- Slopes, surprisingly! Six years ago when I started, Unity was ill-equipped for 2D games. If you used the physics that Unity provided you'd have a really floaty character that wouldn't adhere to the slope when going downhill. There were a hundred different tutorials saying different things (use forces, use move position, use translation, etc). You can get rectangular collisions done in a day, but to do slopes took weeks. Meanwhile, games can actually get by fine without slopes. Most people won't even notice. Did you know the Phoenotopia flash game didn't have slopes? Neither does Hollow Knight or Rogue Legacy. You can save yourself a lot of work by avoiding slopes.

(big entities look weird on slopes. Bad slope!)

I could write enough little knowledge nuggets like this to fill a book! But I'd rather just make the next game.

So… what IS next?

As mentioned previously, it's not Phoenotopia 2. Pirate and I are mostly just tossing some ideas back and forth right now. We'll go silent for a year (or two). Our next game's scope will be more modest in some ways, more ambitious in others. It will definitely be more smartly designed. (There will be a map!)

We'll announce it when it's ready for the public. It might be necessary for us to do a kickstarter. I've tried to avoid kickstarters having been burnt on quite a few myself and also because I worry that mismanaging a kickstarter would earn the ire of backers.

But I did keep this blog regularly updated for six years. So I've gained some confidence in my abilities to at least manage a kickstarter well.

Is it really the last Phoenotopia Blog update though?

Okay, not really. There is some news that I'll need to announce, and this blog is one of the game's main outreach channels. Here are the events that will cause me to update the blog:

Announcing the launch of the xbox/playstation ports when they're ready

If a physical edition of the game happens

If a new language is getting introduced into the game (Korean is a high possibility)

When we're ready to talk about our next game

If (BIG IF) we begin development on a Phoenotopia sequel. I do want to do a sequel one day if we have the means and the demand is there.

Those updates will be more on a "when they happen" basis, rather than me reporting in every couple months.

Fan Art

As always, I'm very happy to see fanart of Phoenotopia. Major thanks again to Pimez for collecting all the artwork from the corners of the internet! Since this is the "last" blogpost, Sir Pimez can finally take a rest from collecting the fanart :P

ÆV made a series of pictures that tell a story. A Pooki is humanely sheared of its wool to create a hat. The Pooki is unharmed. Nice! Gotta love Gail’s expressions.

Amagoo Mazeru makes a stunning landscape shot of a full moon and shooting stars. It’s a sharp and clear vector art. I like the faint glow of the moon and the fire and the subtle gradient in the night sky. Very skillfully done!

Hah hah. I got a chuckle out of this one. I imagine this is how Gail's enemies see her by the end of the game. CaESar made this image based on TerminalMontage's famous youtube videos. Nailed it!

CrownStar drew two pictures of Gail. I'm a big player of JRPGs, so the first shot instantly reminded me of Persona 4's art style. (Hmmm... Phoeonotopia as a JRPG... there’s potential there...) Next, Birdy is shown carried off after her defeat. I really like Birdy's expression here - she just seems mildly uncomfortable.

There's a bit of a story behind the first image. As Firanka shares it, she wasn't able to defeat the Big Eye monster at the end of the flash game, so she believed a tall tale that what awaited after was a 6 armed Kobold boss. Hilarious! The second is a rendition of the lonely Anuri elder. A rare subject. The loneliness is portrayed well here. I feel lonely just looking at it!

Koo_chop draws the clash between Gail and Katash at the top of the towers. I really like this interpretation of the game's art style. It’s faithful to the in-game graphics. And the lighting, from the glow of Gail's bat, to Katash's sword, and the lightning in the background... Amazing!

Lime Hazard shows Gail with a salute pose. Very appropriate for this occasion. I also like how there's a slight tilt in the angle that Gail is portrayed. Those dynamic angles are always hard to get right, and Lime Hazard pulled it off very skillfully. See you next mission!

Lyoung0J with a digital painting of Gail posed sitting on a rock. I like how it almost seems like she was caught in a candid moment - she’s smiling, but also feeling self-conscious. Cute! The art style really pops, and I like how Gail is sporting what I call the old anime style nose.

MyUesrNameIsSh*t with a sketch of Gail performing a skillful slingshot. I like how Gail is depicted with her tongue out in a mischievous manner, the way all mischievous people with slingshots do.

Niitsu Kentaro returns with a 2021 Happy New Year picture. That happened didn't it? A New Year... Gail's pose gave me a chuckle with how she seems to be waving the bat around as casually as one would wave hello. And "Phoenotopiyear"... Well said! One day we'll have our Phoenotopiyear...

Ochan Nu breaks all records with a stunning NINE pictures in one session :O

There's so many goodies here. My favorite would be the one with Gail staring intently at the screen - it's like she's looking directly at you. You almost feel uncomfortable.

Next, there's an Animal Crossing villager dressed as Gail and sporting her pink hair. It even looks like a house Gail would live in. Gail is a connoisseur of the arts and likes Mona Lisa. Yes :)

There are various comics of Gail pointing out Gail's weird food habits. A picture of Fran looking really cool, and even Gail rocking a bathing suit. (bathing suit image linked here in case NSFW). Wow!

Pimez didn't just collect the arts, he creates them as well! This one, which he aptly named 'The Year 175' is a depiction of when the dragons invaded the towers as told by an elderly Daean woman. Great pixeling skills! I got a good chuckle from the ice dragon leaving with its stuff slung over its shoulder.

Quo made a stunning picture of Gail playing the flute surrounded by the 5 musical notes and the Phoenix logo behind her. The theme seems to be "fire" and it works really well. Gail herself looks awesome depicted in her red suit - it's like she's leading a marching band!

Rai Asuha depicts Gail in the late game with her red suit, and night star bat, and holding a lamp. She looks ready for adventure! I really like the white outline here and Gail's poofy shoulders here - the art style feels reminiscent of Final Fantasy Tactics.

Seri also draws Gail bearing her late game equipment. Unique to Seri's drawing is how all of Gail's equipment is accessible from a pocket on her shirt. I also like how Gail is depicted with her lucky earrings - that accessory is often forgotten.

Treedude depicts Gail with a bat and wearing a funny smirk. She looks like she's ready to hurt someone!

Warotar returns with everyone's favorite Great Drake, Bubbles! It seems so happy to be featured!

I'm really grateful for all the fanart this game has received. From the bottom of my heart, thank you!

Closing Notes

Pirate drew a picture to mark the occasion. It shows Gail enjoying a hot chocolate with marshmallows and a pumpkin muffin. A rest well-earned...

Goodbye! Until next time!

#phoenotopia

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revengerevisited · 3 years

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So I’ve been kinda dancing around my original story idea for a little while, and I got this idea in my head of ‘what if I release chapter 1 and then get feedback without telling anyone what the story is about first so it’s more of a surprise?’ But honestly? I’m realizing since I already released a preview-of-a-preview for chapter 1, and it might be a little while until I finish chapter 1, plus I honestly kinda feel like I’d rather work on sketches of my character designs than write at the moment, I might as well go ahead and tell you guys. X’3

So! I watched a couple anime recently both centered around the premise of... monster girls! These being Monster Musume and Monster Girl Doctor, but then I noticed there’s also Interviews with Monster Girls, A Centaur’s Life, and the infamous Interspecies Reviewers, and I asked myself... Monster girls are pretty popular right now, yeah? But where’s all the monster boys?! And that’s how I got the idea! I re-watched some of my favorite anime based on Otome Games, Kamigami no Asobi and Uta no Prince Sama for inspiration as well, and a few ones I hadn’t seen before like Dance with Devils and Magic-kyun Renaissance for inspiration as well.

So now I’ve got my premise that I shared earlier: This is the story of Millie, a young woman down on her luck who happens to live in a world where monsters aren’t just real, but commonplace. She started working as a maid in a mansion-turned-art-school whose students are a group of very attractive monster boys. The twist is that these aren’t just any monster boys; they belong to various rare and exotic species with deadly reputations...

Note that character and place names are technically place-holders for now and may change if I come up with better ones. Now, I don’t wanna spoil anything story-wise, but I think I can introduce my setting and some of the characters that you’re gonna meet. The story is set in a modern setting, though it’s vague if it’s actually Earth or just some generic world similar to it, as I try to avoid referencing real-world places or events. This is a world where humans and monsters live together after a Great Interspecies War happened in the past, but tensions have mostly relaxed by the time the story takes place. The war could be thought of as the equivalent of our own World War One, one in which there was a truce decided after many years of stalemate fighting.

The city everything takes place in is tentatively named Dullahan, and was built directly after the war to commemorate peace between human and monster kind. It’s considered an artistic cultural center, and it’s got a lot of interesting entertainment places to go to, arcades, theaters, aquariums, etc, that the characters can have a lot of different shenanigans in. The other main setting is the Beaufort Academy of the Arts, which was actually a mansion that was converted into a small private school. This is where all the characters live, and our main character Millie works as a maid there.

Before I go into the characters, I should start with the various monster species. There are 12 species, divided into 2 groups: common monsters and exotic monsters. The common monsters are centaurs, harpies, lamias (snake people), kobolds (dog people), ogres, and merrows (mermaids). These species are all pretty standard, and will be mostly background characters and npcs. The main characters, and love interests for Millie, will be of the exotic variety: arachnes (spider people), sirens (deep-sea mermaids), mandrakes (plant people), dragons, manticores (with a liontaur body-type), and scyllas (octopus people).

So what differentiates a common monster from an exotic one? Well, while the Interspecies War was between humans and monsters in general, some monsters were already at least partially integrated into human society, and the rest followed soon after the war ended. These monsters were almost as common as humans, and either herbivorous or omnivorous, with the exception of the carnivorous lamias who prefer to eat eggs over anything else. On the other hand, the so-called ‘exotic’ species were not only much more rare, but they had a very different food preference... one which earned them the now derogatory nickname... man-eaters.

Naturally, most ‘man-eaters’ weren’t exactly welcomed into human --nor common monster-- society with open arms, not that most of them wanted to. For the most part, species as powerful and dangerous as them didn’t want to play nice with those they had once --and in some cases still do-- regard as prey, and so hid away into the furthest reaches of the world. Which of course makes them perfect material for all our leading men and Millie’s various love-interests!! Oh yes, while all of these monster boys are perfectly civilized --well, for the most part-- they still belong to species that many both human and monster alike continue to fear to this day. While they aren’t exactly fish out of water (well, except for the siren) there’s still plenty of awkward misunderstandings and interesting scenarios that can be played out.

So! Let’s have a quick run-down of the characters, keep in mind that none of these names are final and could change later on. First there’s Millie, a hardworking young woman who’s had a recent streak of bad luck. Through a misunderstanding she gets hired as a maid in a mansion-turned-art-school. She’s very sweet and tries her best to help others, but she’s not as innocent as she appears; she’ll understand your innuendos just fine, even if she doesn’t really say any herself! Next is Richard and Lara Beaufort, a husband and wife who run the school. Richard is rather laid-back, yet he’s also a master of all kinds of art, painting, sculpture, photography, dancing, singing, you name it! Lara is his arachne wife, a rather boisterous woman who owns a high-class fashion company. The secret to her clothing’s success?? Arachne silk, of course! The school was her idea, a way to help better integrate exotic species into society. Will her mission succeed? Only time can tell.

Richard and Lara have a son named Simon, our first love interest and a human-arachne hybrid who takes almost entirely after his mother in the looks-department (hybrids tend to look like one species or the other, rather than a mix of both). He’s a bit withdrawn due to dealing with bullying as a kid; most people --human and monster alike-- are afraid of his spider-like appearance, so he doesn’t get out much-- to the point his parents worry about him being a shut-in for life! He’s also a gamer boy, and has a secret soft side for gothic poetry, although he doesn’t want to join his parents’ art classes. He actually disapproves of his mother’s exotic species integration plan, as from what he’s experienced he feels it’s a waste of time.

Simon’s best friend and Millie’s second love interest is Louis, a mandrake who lives in the woods behind the manor. Louis is extremely shy and more than a bit lonely, even more so than Simon, and he doesn’t speak very often out of fear that the sound of his voice will hurt others around him. Mandrake screams can induce insanity or even kill those that hear them, hence his fear. Being part plant, Louis has mild shape-shifting abilities and is able to transform between child and young adult forms at will, although he’s actually the oldest of the group. He also isn’t a student at the art school, although he has an interest in floristry.

Now for our actual students! Forrest is a manticore, which in this world means he has a body similar to that of a centaur, but with the lower half of a lion instead of a horse, and a scorpion-like tail tipped with a deadly venomous stinger. Despite his species’s name literally meaning ‘man-eater’, Forrest is extremely friendly and cheerful, and is very sporty too. His passion is photography, and he also loves eating food-- any sort of meat dish is fine by him! He’s also a fan of fantasy tabletop roleplaying games, and will often make references comparing them to everyday life; he always plays the knight who saves the princess!

Anthony is a childhood ‘friend’ of Forrest’s, though he’s loathe to admit it. Highly intelligent and highly snobbish, Anthony fancies himself an intellectual-- and he’s not exactly wrong. Being a dragon, he likes to hoard things-- in his case, knowledge. Anthony loves to read, and is most often found in the library. His skill is in drawing and painting, and all his paintings’ invariably morose subject matter worry Millie. Still, this haughty dragon could definitely learn to loosen up a little, and be a little more kind; perhaps his stay at the academy --and his interactions with Millie-- will open his mind to appreciating the feelings of others. He does, at the very least, greatly respect Master Beaufort as a master of the arts.

The other two students are denizens of the sea, and have been friends for a very long time. Emil is a scylla, and like all scyllas he’s a little eccentric, and just can’t seem to keep his tentacles to himself! While Forrest is obsessed with eating, Emil’s true calling is cooking, and he loves making all kinds of dishes, especially anything seafood and/or foreign. Emil also is highly appreciative of women’s fashion, and absolutely adores everything to come from Madam Beaufort’s clothing brand-- so much so that he actually wears them himself! His pretty-boy looks and penchant for wearing women’s clothing actually has Millie mistake him for a girl at first, though he’s very much unafraid to show her his romantic side, or at least what he interprets as romantic...

Keeping Emil’s pervy antics in check is our sixth and final monster boy, Oswald! As a siren, Oswald spent most of his life in the sea, and still has a lot to learn about humanity. He’s a pretty cool guy but gets a bit embarrassed about his species’s troublesome past as the cause of many shipwrecks at sea, and would prefer to not discuss it. His passion is rock music, and his main instrument is the guitar. He also loves to sing, but refrains from doing so due to the hypnotic effect it has on other species. His lack of legs, tentacles, or a snake-like tail means that like other merrows and sirens he requires a wheelchair to move around on land, and often feels frustrated that he can’t show off how adept he is at traversing water. He’s also easy to embarrass and obsessed with not allowing anything to ‘ruin’ his manly image, including allowing Millie (a girl!) to help carry him around.

So there you have it, all my monster boys! I left out a few things, as those would be major spoilers, but those are my ideas for the characters for now! I’ll try to draw and post some sketches of their designs later. Hopefully I haven’t forgotten anything, but this won’t be the last time I talk about monster boys. Any questions or comments would be very much appreciated! Nsfw questions are allowed (all the boys wear pants for a reason, after all), though I’m currently not sure if this series will be 16+ or 18+, if you catch my meaning. Lemme know how interested you are in this story, or if you’re not interested please let me know that too!

#writing #monster boys #maddie's monster boys #if you ever wanted to see a merman wear pants... here's your chance XD

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shy-magpie · 3 years

Text

RQG 160

Live blog under the cut! Gee hitting stuff I wrote only 1 year ago, look at the momentum!

Ben and Alex are having fun with being the two people least distressed at the idea of Zolf in danger. On the other hand Ben did make him a beefy boy; so on some level he does care about making sure he lives.

"not again"?

I swear to god he tried to blow Zolf's head off and missed by the mercy of the dice. Multi guns on the trap emphasized because "Mr She Can't One Shot Me" is not playing with an amateur.

Is Azu going to do the fling open the window bit?

Oh good Zolf isn't going indulge Earhardt

I love how Alex doesn't pull the blow but doesn't twist the knife. Like it would undermine the whole plot point if he tried to pretend Earhardt just needed a day to dry out and a bath, but he didn't go into it or even talk about it on an emotional level. Just gave us the facts, she is underweight because she hasn't been taking care of herself.

"do you touch it" Alex trying to scare us and the players

Azu is giving substantial alms to the whole floor on principle. Nope the whole building.

Alex is the best, clarifies a few things for the listener even though he clearly knows that Helen knows it.

Zolf channels all 7 Positive Energies (drawn from Hope) at the whole building as they go.

I believe that is what the kids call "direct action". Especially nice that Helen remembered to have Azu tell the temple to do more long term stuff.

And I think I will pause it at this transition point because it one of those days and I can't get 5 minutes uninterrupted to listen even though I thought I had over an hour clear. Will resume 13 minutes in.

Lets try that again!

That's my boy! No hesitation about deferring to Skraak as an expert.

"Locusts", "you'll see why", what are you doing Alex?

Zolf sets Earhardt up in his room and assists Azu in looking her over. The Positive Energy did most of the work but since RQ is good people they get that even if all the physical side is dealt with she's still going to need some time and help. Side note: so far neatly avoiding my (for want of a milder word) triggers, of course she's barely spoken but still its nice to be at "natural level of distress at a beloved NPC in a bad condition" and not "is this where I tap out or is the best way out through?". Helps of course that RQ is full of people who are aware of mental health issues & aren't going to excuse abuse but aren't going to write anyone off either. There are bad people in RQG but its their choices, (repeated choices over time) that makes them bad, no one is born evil or evil because of something that happened to them.

"The Heart Beats Faster", I love that Zolf & Azu bonded over those books. Its just so *nice* they have something other than the end of the world in common.

Zolf is going to try to get Earhardt the same food she served aboard her ship.

The Kobolds are great and I love the image of them swarming over the ship

Cel is distressed at the unsorted parts but it sounds like they get to it as a separate step in the process

Oh Cel with a focus for their energy, we've never seen that. I wonder how the others react, I know it can throw people off to see the flip side of ADHD after getting used to the idea of scatter brained.

Hamid has to babysit since the Kobolds are still sticking close to him. Hopefully they've moved past expecting him to go Shoin on them and are now on the "we're only safe under the protection of our benevolent overlord" stage. Resilient sons of guns, its been like a week since they were drugged slaves yet the post trauma speed run doesn't feel forced. Not sure if its worth making a separate post to put in small words things like "when you expect people in power to be dangerous & unpredictable, you feel intensely if not problematically grateful for respect & even temper". On the other hand I have a list as long as my arm of posts I keep meaning to write on tricky bits that RQ does well.

Break

Zolf has perked up now that he has a project #relatable

I love the little tangent on elementals.

"adjust accordingly" I think that means you can do it but you will pay for it.

Tumblespark is such a great name.

The party is just good people ya know? Azu is sitting vigil with Earhardt in Zolf's room, (which he didn't hesitate to give up) while the others get her ship airworthy.

Huh, thought Alex would want to take the opportunity with the Kobolds doing engineering again to poke at their past. Probably trying to keep the emotional energy balanced, he is uncanny at that.

Someone took the notes on his pacing seriously and is making it clear they can't run themselves ragged if they wanted to.

Zolf *bap* take care of yourself. Oh, Azu, be fair why don't you? Yes him choosing what to do with his money includes choosing to spend it on team stuff, but didn't he burn his armor in the lightening strike? And its not like indulging in, IDK, fancy beard oil, good spices or something would kill him.

Zolf is in fact a brooding hero in the chicken sense

Wow Pathfinder without tweaks handles withdrawal with some sensitivity? Or is Alex being creative in his interpretation.

Oh Alex, oh Earhardt, see what I mean about not pulling the punch but not twisting the knife.

Ok Hamid doing the mending while watching the Kobolds is such an image

Oh Zolf, thats a good thought.

Oh Earhardt

Zolf is trying, bless him. Honest to god that someone is trying, does help. Oh Zolf, see this honesty about emotion even when it isn't pretty or simple is why I trust them with stuff like this.

A Meritocrat? Oh Earhardt one last run. There is no bow to tie on it; seriously bless RQ especially Alex & Ben for getting that.

Azu is so damn good at this, respecting the choices of the crew is the exact line to take

Yeah but Zolf would have left the room, he took the "walk away" lesson a bit too well.

Research? Fairy tales, medical, missed the third. Yeah Ben it was killing a Meritocrat or bringing back the dead and we've had an undead arc.

Leave Apophis for last would ya

Bit direct Zolf, but yes I think that would help.

I love how "you chose to do this" is a recurring topic of conversation.

Well shoot all that prep and they don't touch on what I was worried about. Still learning not to grit my teeth when I could take simple measures takes practice so not like it went to waste.

Its my week! I got a great episode with so much character bits, and Casper for my week! (ETA as in the week my name got listed in the patreon thank yous)

#Rusty Quill Gaming #RQG Spoilers #RQG Season 4 #RQG 160 #live blog thingy #addiction #health #mental health

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incarnateirony · 5 years

Note

"Literally fucking text guys" You are forgetting that text can be vague. If text is vague, unclear, open to various interpretations, then it offers the same murkiness as subtext. What's the win here?

I pity anyone that doesn’t understand what repeat, textual, sexual encounters with men even double dogging the same target “hints at”

Holy shit.

No, that’s not how this works.

I know you’ve all been lost to this bog of fanfiction, spooge, and not wanting to hurt anybody’s feelings by pretending all interpretations are equal, but that’s not how any of this works.

It’s what everybody says to play nice in the sandbox, and to act like it’s somehow, IDK, inappropriate to laugh at the levels of ridiculous that people use to *explain around it even when they know better*, or even *because* they know better. Explaining around *what they literally understand the text to mean* does not change the fucking text. It doesn’t change canon.

I could go back and write the most arbitrary 400 page thesis and interpret that the yellow eyed demon was actually the same as the zanna and all demons are actually secretly unicorns and that’s why Meg was obsessed with unicorns and why nobody could find them cuz they’re all hiding as demons. Because Interpretation™. But we know that isn’t how it fucking works.

No matter how many ways you spin yourselves in circles and try to make some Iron Clad Da Proof Where Nobody Ever Can Argue It Ever Evers Evers, my sweet summer child. There have literally been textually manifest, full-kiss, having-a-child, 8 year slow burn HETEROSEXUAL ROMANCES that have had people try to fucking explain circles around it. *That doesn’t have any bearing on the goddamn canon.*

(Will I ever stop bringing up Mulder and Scully? probably not. It’s even genre relevant. Shit.)

No, the line that defines “text” has never, in any universe, or any dictionary, or any even mildly grounded-to-earth conversation, EVER been synonymous with “understood by every single idiot on the planet, even ones that refuse to understand it actively.” Because by this standard like, nothing on planet earth is canon. Anything else along this line comes back to my posts about you fighting a phantom GA that doesn’t exist the way you’ve been convinced it does on any stat, and is contrary to how the GA is actually discussing the content, but because some tinhats that run Winbros shut down conversation in public mediums for years and battered you into *completely fucking up definitions of words far and beyond Supernatural to make their arguments valid*, everybody imagines exists, and it quite literally doesn’t.

Seriously y’all what the fuck how do you NOT perceive how fucked up you’ve let your conversational line get?

I can’t tell anymore. Is this just staunch refusal in self-defense due to unwillingness to realize you’ve been convinced to paddle in the opposite direction of where you mean to? Like? What he fuck? Genuinely, fandom, what the fuck.

Before *any* of you send me another damn anon to waste my time while I’m in the middle of developing a product, take some damn time to introspect on what mix of internalized homophobia, and just downright troll-oriented-I-must-win-the-fight-with-a-digital-pigeon mindset makes you latch onto this shit. Ask who even planted that (COMPLETELY MADE UP) definition of text, canon, or anything else in your heads to begin with. Do some origin searching.

And most of all, to every bisexual individual enjoying the content:

You are valid, you are not lesser; people wanting more VISIBLE representation are valid, too, but the validness of that emotion does not remove the reality of the textual content delivered today, and somewhere in the madness of all of this, those of you taking it into account deserve general congratulations on the overtness, and don’t let a single goddamn self-motivated twitter kobold -- WHATEVER their personal motivation is -- ever let them strip you of the value of that text to you. You’re valid, the text is the text, and... people be mad, but people always be mad around here.

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paperanddice · 5 years

Text

Moss Lurker

Moss lurkers seem like they should be fey, but for some reason aren’t (even in the errata). They instead get the humanoid typing, though they sit a little outside the standard for humanoid. Immunity to fire and blindness is interesting, and they’re very proficient with poisons, using them to augment some of their weapons and getting an ability just describing how they can poison a water or food source. The ability describing that they have disadvantage while using weapons with the Heavy property isn’t technically necessary, but many GMs may forget that rule in normal play, so having the reminder is useful.

They really do feel like a fey instead of a full humanoid species though, as they seem to have no kind of civilization or culture at all, just existing in the wild as chaotic, gnome-like creatures. They love big weapons and dropping boulders, and not much else it seems. I do get a small laugh that they can only drop a boulder 100 feet, after which it apparently just disappears. Winged kobolds in the Monster Manual don’t get a distance limit, just a requirement that the target be directly below them, and technically the wording on the moss lurker leaves the option of throwing it 100 feet directly up, though I don’t expect anyone to take that interpretation seriously.

Also, they’re another example of “big nose = evil” and that’s just… so boring by now.

Gnome communities usually remain safe through being unnoticed. Underground buildings with hidden entrances, paths obscured by vegetation, some illusion magic to be extra convincing if needed. So sometimes a gnome community disappears and nobody notices. When a magical plague runs through a hidden community, it warps and transforms the victims into something almost like what they were, but not quite. Now, years later, the moss lurkers have rebuilt into a whole new people and some are looking for revenge on those who never even noticed their troubles.

Stories of trolls in the woods draw adventurers armed with fire. It turns out that the locals have a different definition of troll however, as fire proves useless and rather than giants the trolls are halfling sized and make strong use of poison and ambush tactics to make the hunters regret ever coming here.

A moss lurker picked a number of myconid sprouts and attached them to its hat for camouflage. To its utter bewilderment, the sprouts grew and now see it as their sovereign. While they are still primarily pacifist and will only fight in defense of themselves or their leader, it has taken advantage of their fungal servants and spores to spread poison and contamination to others in new and creative ways.

I want to say thank you to my friend Jon McGee for helping me come up with that last plot hook.

#D&D #DnD #Dungeons and Dragons #5th edition #D&D5e #Tome of Beasts #Kobold Press #monster

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creativerogues · 5 years

Text

A Chronomancer’s Guide: Chronomancy Spells & Ideas

Playing an “Official” Chronomancer...

While there’s no Chronomancer Subclass for 5th Edition from Wizards of the Coast, there are still ways to create a Chronomancer-Like Character with the Official Rules.

One way is to just take the Divination Wizard, get some divination spells that let you determine fate, see the future, change the attack rolls and ability checks of yourself and others, and throw in some Spells like Slow, Haste and Time Stop and boom! An Unofficial Chronomancer...

In terms of Feats, I think the best Feat to fit the idea of a Chronomancer, a Master of Time and Space, is Keen Mind.

Keen Mind You have a mind that can track time, direction, and detail with uncanny precision. You gain the following benefits: • Increase your Intelligence score by 1, to a maximum of 20. • You always know which way is north. • You always know the number of hours left before the next sunrise or sunset. • You can accurately recall anything you have seen or heard within the past month.

First off, a bonus to Intelligence, great for a Wizard Chronomancer, second, you always know the number of hours left before the next sunrise or sunset and can accurately recall anything you have seen or heard within the past month because Time Magic and Stuff...

I think it’s a good feat, but let’s get on to the more important things, Spells!

I’ve already made a shortlist just from scanning through the Books on what I think a Chronomancer has:

1st Level

Longstrider: Cause Yourself or Another Creature to move faster.

Expeditious Retreat: Cause Yourself to move faster.

Feather Fall: Slow the descent of Yourself and Other Creatures.

2nd Level

Misty Step: Bamf across the battlefield!

Continual Flame: Manipulate a Flame to burn forever.

Blur: Thinking of this like moving from one space to another so fast the enemy can’t figure out your true location...

Hold Person: Freeze a Creature in place.

3rd Level

Slow: Cause time to slow for Creatures in an area.

Haste: Cause time to flow faster for Yourself or Another Creature.

Blink: Bamf around the battlefield again and again!

4th Level

Fabricate: Think of it like putting everything on fast-forward until the material is crafted...

Dimension Door: Think of it like manipulating space to bamf back to a place you remember...

5th Level

Teleportation Circle: Another bamf spell to get you around.

Modify Memory: Cause a person to remember events that never happened (at least not in this timeline...)

Legend Lore: Recall all the information and history of an person, place or object.

Far Step: Yet another bamf spell! (Because Time & Space are linked bro!)

6th Level

Contingency: What sounds more Chronomancer-Like than casting a Spells days or weeks in advance with a specific circumstance. (Think you’re about to drown and don’t have much left? Well luckily you cast Water Breathing a week ago for this specific scenario...)

7th Level

Reverse Gravity: Manipulating time and space, and in my mind, that includes gravity...

Teleport: Again, bamfing to a place you know (or don’t!)

Delayed Blast Fireball: It’s like Fireball, but delayed, because Time Magic!

9th Level

Wish: Wish let’s you do anything, including undoing a single recent event by forcing a re-roll of any roll made within the last round (including your last turn) and reality reshapes itself to accommodate for the new result...

Time Stop: You stop time, I think that’s obvious...

Foresight: You see the future. (Maybe flavor this to be you sending your mind into each of the possible timelines for the future and seeing every single solution before making a decision...)

Using 3rd Party Content to make your Chronomancer...

Now, if you can convince your DM to let you play a Timey-Wimey Spacebender, then ask if you can use some 3rd Party Content, because there’s some great stuff out there that I think is really neat, and some of the 3rd Party Spells that have been created are pretty much “Time Magic” Spells anyways.

I’ve put a few of my personal favorites here:

Matt Mercer’s Dunamancy

For those that don’t know, Dunamancy is a homebrew School of Magic created by none other than the DM of Critical Role himself, Matt Mercer.

Dunamis appears to heavily rely on quantum mechanics, including the Many Worlds Interpretation that results in multiple versions of us existing based on the possibilities explored or left to explore to another version of ourselves in another timeline.

However, having much more experience with this magic, dunamancers seem able to call upon their alternate selves to aid them in battle, in the forms of shadowy echoes.

And while there’s no published Subclass of Dunamancy, Matt has showcased a few Dunamancy Spells and Abilities on the show already:

Gift of Alacrity

1st-level

Target gains +1d8 to initiative rolls for 8 hours.

Fortune's Favor

2nd-level

Target gains 1 Fragment of Possibility for 1 hour.

Compress Gravity

Compress Gravity causes targets to make a Constitution saving throw. The targets take force damage and their speed is reduced to half for one round.

Vacuum Blast

Creatures in a 20 foot radius around a point of the caster's choosing make a Constitution saving throw and take force damage.

Gravity Well (Ability). After affecting another creature with any spell effect, a Mage could use this ability to push the target 10 feet in any direction of their choice.

Manifest Echo (Bonus Action). A Mage can summon an echo of themselves on their turn that is able to cast a spell on its own, in addition to allowing the Mage themselves to cast another spell at the same time...

Chronomancy Spells - Middle Finger of Vecna

The Middle Finger of Vecna, while not an Actual Magic Item, is a great blog that creates some amazing and sometimes hilarious spells, subclasses, homebrew rules, monsters and magic items...

Their content is incredibly well-worded and well-done, and I’ve used it in several of the previous campaigns I’ve been in and DM’d for...

Delay

2nd-level transmutation

Casting Time: 1 action

Range: 60 feet

Components: V, S, M (a small crystal)

Duration: Instantaneous

You briefly slow time for a creature of your choice that you can see within range. The target must succeed on a Wisdom saving throw or be moved to last place in the initiative order from the beginning of the next round onward.

Temporal Reversion

5th-level transmutation

Casting Time: 1 action

Range: Touch

Components: V, S

Duration: Instantaneous

The wounds of a creature you touch travel back in time to before they were inflicted. The creature regains hit points equal to 7d4 + your spellcasting ability modifier. This healing works as normal on undead and constructs.

Restore Youth

3rd-level transmutation (ritual)

Casting Time: 8 hours

Range: Touch

Components: V, S, M (gold dust worth at least 500gp, which the spell consumes)

Duration: Instantaneous

You perform a long, complex ritual on another creature, reducing its apparent age by 3d10 years, to a minimum of 13 years. This effect does not extend the creature’s lifespan.

At Higher Levels. When you cast this spell using a spell slot of 6th level or higher, the healing increases by 1d4 for each slot level above 5th.

Mass Haste

7th-level transmutation

Casting Time: 1 action

Range: 30 feet

Components: V, S, M (a shaving of liquorice root)

Duration: Concentration, up to 1 minute

Choose up to three willing creatures that you can see within range. Until the spell ends, the targets' speeds are doubled, they gain a +2 bonus to AC, have advantage on Dexterity saving throws, and it gain an additional action on each of their turns. That action can be used only to take the Attack (one weapon attack only), Dash, Disengage, Hide, or Use an Object action.

When the spell ends, the targets can’t move or take actions until after their next turn, as a wave of lethargy sweeps over them.

At Higher Levels. When you cast this spell using a spell slot of 8th level or higher, you can target one additional creature for each slot level above 7th.

Lesser Time Stop

7th-level transmutation

Casting Time: 1 action

Range: Self

Components: V

Duration: Instantaneous

You briefly stop the flow of time for everyone but yourself. No time passes for other creatures, while you take 2 turns in a row, during which you can use actions and move as normal.

This spell ends if one of the actions you use during this period, or any effects that you create during this period, affects a creature other than you or an object being worn or carried by someone other than you.

In addition, the spell ends if you move to a place more than 300 feet from the location where you cast it.

Evasiveness

5th-level transmutation

Casting Time: 1 action

Range: Touch

Components: V, M (a scrap of silk)

Duration: Concentration, up to 1 hour

You touch a willing creature. Until the spell ends, the target gains a superhuman ability to dodge attacks. The target’s AC becomes 22, if it were lower, regardless of what kind of armor it is wearing.

This spell puts enormous strain on the target’s body. After the spell ends, the target gains one level of exhaustion.

Kobold Press: Deep Magic - Time Magic

Deep Magic: Time Magic by Kobold Press brings the secrets of temporal magic into your 5e campaign, featuring a bunch of new time-related spells that allow you speed up and slow down time and even force enemies into a constant time loop!

Again, I’ve used a lot of their Deep Magic content and I strongly suggest that you take a good look at their other stuff.

And while I obviously can’t just spit everything out in a Post here, I’m gonna share some of the Spells that I think are perfect for a Chronomancer...

Quicken

Transmutation Cantrip

Casting Time: 1 action

Range: Touch

Components: V, S

Duration: Concentration, up to 1 minute

You touch one willing creature. Once before the spell ends, the target can roll a d4 and add the number rolled to its next initiative roll or Dexterity saving throw. The target can roll the die before or after the d20 roll. The spell then ends.

Withered Sight

1st-level necromancy

Casting Time: 1 action

Range: 30 feet

Components: V, S, M (a dried lizard's eye)

Duration: Concentration, up to 1 minute

You cause the eyes of a creature you can see within range to age rapidly. The target must make a Constitution saving throw. If it fails, the creature has disadvantage on Perception rolls and attack rolls. An affected creature repeats the saving throw at the end of its turn, ending the effect with a success. This spell has no effect on a creature that is blind or that doesn’t use its eyes to see.

At Higher Levels. When you cast this spell using a spell slot of 2nd level or higher, you can target one additional creature for each slot level above 1st.

Decelerate

2nd-level transmutation

Casting Time: 1 action

Range: 60 feet

Components: V, S, M (a toy top)

Duration: 1 minute

You slow the flow of time around a creature. The creature must make a successful Wisdom saving throw or its speed is halved (rounded up to the nearest 5-foot increment). Until the effect ends, the creature’s speed is halved again at the start of each of your turns.

For example, a character with a speed of 30 feet fails its saving throw, dropping its speed to 15 feet. At the start of your next turn, the creature’s speed drops to 10 feet, then to 5 feet on the following round.

Decelerate can’t reduce a creature’s speed to less than 5 feet. The spell ends after 1 minute or when the target uses its action to make a successful Wisdom saving throw.

At Higher Levels. When you cast this spell using a spell slot of 3rd level or higher, you can affect an additional creature for each slot level above 3rd.

Time Step

2nd-level conjuration

Casting Time: 1 action

Range: Self

Components: V

Duration: Instantaneous

You briefly step forward in time. You disappear from your location and reappear at the beginning of your next turn in a location within 30 feet of the space you disappeared from. You can’t be affected by anything that happens during the interval you’re missing, and you aren’t aware of anything that happens during that time.

Accelerate

3rd-level transmutation

Casting Time: 1 action

Range: Touch

Components: V, S, M (a toy top)

Duration: Concentration, up to 1 minute

Choose up to three willing creatures within range, which may include you. Until the end of the spell, the target's movement speed doubles. The target can also take a bonus action on each of its turns. This bonus action can only be used to take the Dash action.

In addition, the creature has advantage on Dexterity saving throws while under the effect of this spell.

At Higher Levels. When you cast this spell using a spell slot of 4th level or higher, you can affect an additional creature for each slot level above 3rd.

Time Loop

6th-level transmutation

Casting Time: 1 action

Range: 30 feet

Components: V, S, M (a metal loop)

Duration: Concentration, up to 1 minute

You capture the target in a loop of time. The creature is teleported to the space where it began its previous turn. The target then makes a Wisdom saving throw.

If it succeeds, the spell’s effect ends.

If it fails, the creature must repeat the actions it took on its previous turn, following the same sequence of moves and actions to the best of its ability.

It doesn’t need to move along the same path or attack the same target, but if it moved, then attacked, on its previous turn, its only option is to move, then attack, this turn.

If the space where the target began its previous turn is occupied or it’s impossible for the target to take the same action (if it cast a spell but it’s now unable to do so, for example), the target is incapacitated.

An affected target repeats the saving throw at the end of its turn, ending the effect on itself on a success.

For as long as the duration lasts, the target teleports back to its starting point at the start of each of its turns and it must repeat the same sequence of moves and actions.

Strongholds & Followers: The Chronos Codex

Strongholds and Followers is an absolutely amazing book by MCDM Productions and another book I highly recommend you take a look at.

But in particular, the Magic Items Section of the Book, which provides a series of very powerful, artifact level books called Codices.

And one book in particular, the Chronos Codex, focuses on time manipulation.

Here’s just a taste of the few things it can do:

Summon Temporal Duplicate: Once per month as an action, you can summon a version of yourself from the future.

It is one possible version of your future character. It has your stats but is four levels higher and may have different items or even spells, at your GM’s discretion.

You have no control over your temporal duplicate, but it is a version of you and will probably help you out. Because it is from one possible future, it is experiencing one possible past and may not remember the situation it finds itself in, because it never experienced this past.

The duplicate remains in this manifold of the timescape for 4 + 1d4 rounds, after which it returns to its own time.

If it drops to 0 hit points, it automatically returns — unconscious — to its original manifold.

While you are attuned to the book, the GM may ask you to make a percentile roll at random moments. If you roll a 100, you disappear for 4 + 1d4 rounds, as you are relentlessly pulled backward into an alternate past to serve a version of yourself four levels lower.

Nomad of the Timescape: You cease aging.

As an action once per year, you may sacrifice any number of Hit Dice to move forward or backward in time by a hundred years per Hit Die sacrificed.

You can observe and interact with, but cannot change, the past or future.

Because of the manifold nature of the timescape, the past or future you find yourself in may not be your past or future.

While in another temporal manifold, you sacrifice 1 Hit Dice at the end of each week.

Blink of an Eye: As an action, you can sacrifice any number of Hit Dice to take an equal number of turns in a row.

Other features allow you to travel literally thousands of years into the past or future, and others let you mess with the order of Initiative thanks to some handy time magic, which I think is such an interesting mechanic that you never see a lot of in 5th Edition...

But, if you have a high level ‘Chronomancer’ Wizard, and they don’t have a lot of Magic Items, then I think this little Magic Book could definitely hold some success for them in the future...

Homebrewing Your Chronomancer...

So now that we've gotten past how to make an 'Official' Chronomancer, and how to make one using the 3rd Party Content that's already out there, let's talk about making a Homebrew Chronomancer...

Old School Chronomancy Spells (For Fifth Edition...)

Now, back in ye olden days, there were genuine Chronomancers in the Forgotten Realms and in D&D, but it wasn’t long until people realized how messing with time can mess with the canon of a setting, and just as quickly as it arrived, the Chronomancy School of Magic left...

But it did have some great spells, which I think can be easily adapted to 5th Edition D&D without being too game-breaking...

Zwei’s Extension

4th Level

Casting Time: 1 Action

Range: Self

Components: V

Duration: Instantaneous

Classes: Wizard

Choose a spell of 3rd Level or Lower that you can cast and has a Casting Time of 1 Action.

You cast that spell, called the Extended Spell, as part of casting Zwei’s Extension, expending Spell Slots for both, but the Extended Spell has double its duration, to a maximum duration of 1 Day.

Permanency

9th Level

Casting Time: 1 Minute

Range: Self

Components: V, S

Duration: Until Dispelled

Classes: Wizard

Choose a spell of 4th Level or Lower that you can cast, that has a Casting Time of 1 Minute or less, and that can target only a single creature.

You cast that spell, called the Permanent Spell, as part of casting Permanency, expending Spell Slots for both, but the Permanent Spell comes into effect with an infinite duration, and no longer requires Concentration from the Caster.

For example, a Permanency Spell cast See Invisibility allows you to see Invisible creatures and Objects as if they were visible until you choose to dispel this effect.

While standing within a Field of Anti-Magic or a Similar Effect, the effects brought on by a Permanency Spell are suppressed, these effects cease to be suppressed as soon as you exit.

Temporal Stasis

8th Level

Casting Time: 1 Minute

Range: Touch

Components: V, S, M (A powder composed of diamond, emerald, ruby, and sapphire dust with a total value of at least 5,000 gp.)

Duration: Until Dispelled

Classes: Wizard

You place the Creature into a state of suspended animation.

For the creature, time ceases to flow and its condition becomes fixed. The creature does not grow older. Its body functions virtually cease, and no force or effect can harm it.

This state persists until the magic is removed (such as by a successful Dispel Magic spell or a Wish spell), or until you choose to end it.

Wesley's Delayed Damage

5th Level

Casting Time: 1 Action

Range: Self

Components: V, S

Duration: Concentration, up to 1 Minute

Classes: Wizard

You create a field of temporal flux around you, intercepting physical attacks and shifting all or part of the effects into the future, allowing you time to prepare...

When a creature successfully hits you with a melee or ranged weapon attack, half the damage is applied immediately, and the other half is put off for the duration of the spell, or until you lose concentration.

This delays the need for healing, but be cautious not to lose track of the time since casting.

After the first turn, the spell could expire at any moment, and all deffered damage is then applied at once, which could easily kill the caster...

Effects from the Fifth Edition Monster Manual, changed into ‘Chronomancer Abilities’

A lot of Abilities from the Monsters in the 5th Edition Monster Manual can easily be changed to suit a Chronomancer Wizard, just take a look!

Great Haste (Ghost - Horrifying Visage)

Each creature within 60 feet of you that you can see must succeed on a Constitution saving throw. On a failed save, the target ages 1d4 X 10 years.

If a target’s saving throw is successful, the target is immune to the spell’s effects for the next 24 hours. The aging effect can be reversed with a Greater Restoration spell, but only within 24 hours of it occurring.

This spell has no effect on Undead or constructs.

Taken from the Stats of a Ghost in the Monster Manual, ‘Horrifying Visage’, renamed here to ‘Great Haste’, could easily be a high level spell for a Chronomancer, possibly inflicting some Force Damage or negative effect to the creatures that fail, such as disadvantage on Strength, Dexterity or Constitution checks and saving throws...

Temporal Strike

Melee Weapon Attack: One Creature. Hit: Normal Weapon’s Damage plus 8d12 Psychic Damage.

The target must succeed on a Wisdom saving throw or move 1 round forward in time. A target moved forward in time vanishes for the duration. When the effect ends, the target reappears in the space it left or in an unoccupied space nearest to that space if it’s occupied.

Taken from the Stats of a Githzerai Enlightened, this ability literally lets you punch, kick and whack your foes through time...

And with some editing, it could easily be a high level spell, or some kind of Chronomancer Subclass Ability...

Change Gravity

You cast the Reverse Gravity spell. The spell has the normal effect, except that you can orient the area in any direction and creatures and objects fall toward the end of the area.

Taken from the Stats of a Githzerai Anarch, this feature could oh-so-easily just be an ability for a Chronomancer, changing time and space...

But could also just become a higher level version of Reverse Gravity, so I’d say Change Gravity could be an 8th Level Spell, since Reverse Gravity is 7th Level and we don’t want that Chronomancer getting this thing for free...

Other Effects & Ideas

And as we come to a close on this VERY long Post, here’s just a few of my unfinished thoughts and ideas that you might want to throw into your game, maybe as a Magic Item for a Chronomancer, maybe it’s an Ability a Monster has, or maybe you’re gonna take these ideas and build a Chronomancy subclass over it, I don’t know...

Ability: Grant an Ally advantage on Attack Rolls for the next 3 Rounds of Combat.

Collapse Time (Flavored Version of ‘Power Word Kill’): If the Target has 100 Hit Points or Fewer, it explodes and dies.

At ___th level, you cease aging.

At ___th level, when you cast a Spell with a casting time of 1 Action, you can spend a Spell Slot of the Spell's Level or Higher to reduce the casting time for this Spell to 1 Bonus Action.

At ___th level, you can cast the Haste Spell without expending a Spell Slot, but the Spell affects only you. Once you cast Haste in this way, you can’t do so again until you finish a short or long rest. You can still cast it normally using an available spell slot.

At ___th level, you add the Haste Spell to your Spellbook, if it is not there already. You never suffer the negative after effects of the Haste Spell and can act normally when the Spell ends.

When you are surprised at the beginning of an encounter, you can choose to expend a Spell Slot of 1st Level or Higher to not be surprised.

When you need to make a Dexterity saving throw, you can choose to expend a Spell Slot of 1st Level or Higher to make the saving throw with advantage.

You become proficient in the History and Arcana skills if you are not already proficient..

#wizard #chronomancer #chronomancy #dunamancy #middlefingerofvecna #kobold press #deep magic #time magic #strongholds & followers #mcdm #homebrew #homebrew rules #homebrew spells #dnd 5e homebrew #creativerogues

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blackdragon-selfships · 5 years

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I'm posting this to my secondary account because it involves my self-insert, but the dragon version (she's gone through a few changes since I posted my Fursona reference sheet). This isn't strictly related to my AU "Medieval Villainy" where Black Hat takes the form of a dragon and two kobolds work for him as his "top minions/servants". A blue bear then joins the group as a failed result to the kobold named Flug dabbling with Alchemy and magic. By their dragon overlord's orders of course.

On the side I've been playing around with a self-insert version of the AU that isn't canon to actual AU at all, and this was one of the sketches I did in one of my school notebooks. Then I decided to color it digitally, mostly to fix Demencia. I don't know why, but I struggle so much with drawing her in any form she's in. It's like I don't know what to do with her expression or action. (More explained under the Read More.)

As far as stories go...it's pretty open to interpretation mostly. At least for the top one. I don't know what Dragon Hat (that's this AU BH's name, yeah...though I've been purposefully not drawing the hat while at school to avoid anyone recognizing him) and Pendara (Meg/BlackDragon/BD's dragon name) are doing or talking about. I just drew him looking like that, then I drew her probably trying to explain something...but I'm not sure I want to think about what this could be. (Unless you guys think it's a date and she's a nervous wreck. I'd totally go with that. XD)

The bottom sketch has more of a story to it. If Pendara were in this AU and the boss had taken an interest in her (not necessarily in a romantic sense) Demencia would try to fight her. Feeling 'threatened' by Pendara being a member of her (Demencia's) beloved's 'species' (he's not actually a dragon, just prefers the shape of one in that time period) and having delusions that she'll be "competition." Kobold!Flug would be scolding her, having that worshipful attitude toward any dragon, being under the impression they're all as evil and ruthless as Dragon Hat. He'd be thoroughly disappointed to learn the truth...

This is all hypothetical of course. The AU itself is meant to follow the canon of the show but in a different setting, so Pendara wouldn't be a part of it. I don't even have a BlackCoffee storyline for this AU either...but if people are interested I could do more art for this take on the AU in the future.

————

Villanous/Villainos (c) Alan Ituriel & Cartoon Network

Pendara/BlackDragon, Medieval Villains AU, and art (c) @theblackdragonstudios / @just-a-blackdragon-in-love

Bonus: Traditional sketch version

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flyingthehedge · 6 years

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Spirit Work for Imbolc

All the sabbats, contrary to popular belief, are great for working and connecting with the Otherworld. Imbolc, one of the fire festivals, celebrates the coming of Spring and the return of the Sun. With these themes in mind, here are 3 ways to connect and work with spirits on Imbolc.

1. Meet and greet your house spirits.

Every home has a spirit of its own as well as house spirits that you may or may not be aware of. Imbolc is a great time to meet and get to know them, as this is a time for new beginnings. This is also the time for "spring cleaning," and it is important that you work with the spirits of your home during any such deep cleaning or purging to avoid upsetting them. You may even end up finding them extremely helpful in the process as well! Examples of such spirits include Brownies, Hobs, Kobolds, Hobgoblins, Domovoy, and Tomtes. I grew up hearing about Tomtes, especially when something that was missing was suddenly found in plain sight, so this is often the name I use when I refer to my household spirit and guardian. With your Grimoire or Book of Shadows close at hand, sit on the floor in a central location of your home. Begin by closing your eyes and trying to sense your home's spirit, not your guardian spirit. What does your home feel like to you? Does it have an aura? If so, what color is it? Does it have a voice? Spend roughly 5 to 10 minutes sensing your home and gathering as much information as you can. When you are done, thank your house for providing you with warmth and shelter, and jot down any notes regarding your experience.

After you have met your house's spirit, its time to see if you have a home guardian spirit. The best place for this type of work is in the kitchen. Close your eyes and search your home's energy for anything unusual, especially around the stove. Since you have already met your home's spirit, you will be able to distinguish its energy from any other presence that may be residing there. Don't be upset if you can't find anything. It doesn't necessarily mean you don't have a household guardian, it may be that they are hiding from you. If you are able to sense something, greet it, and ask what it is and if it has a name it would like you to call it. Household spirits will generally identify themselves if you ask them directly, as they are there to keep you and the home safe. Make sure to thank them before you are done with a small offering. Milk, honey, or some bread work nicely. Write down anything you experienced. If you are unable to sense the spirit, leave an offering all the same on top of the stove. Continue to try to sense your household spirit for up to 3 days. If you are still unable to make a connection, you may not have a home guardian spirit and should consider inviting one in.

2. Cleanse your spirit.

As I mentioned before, spring cleaning starts around Imbolc, so why not cleanse your own spirit? I know witches are more likely to ritualistically cleanse themselves, but when was the last time you truly practiced self-care instead of just saging yourself? Yeah, that's what I thought. To cleanse your spirit, why not take a white bath? This recipe is adapted from Devin Hunter's recipe in his book The Witch's Book of Spirit. I have tried a lot of bath recipes, but this one is by far the best at deep cleaning your spirit. It is inspired by a New Orleans-style Voodoo recipe to cleanse you both spiritually, mentally, and physically.

2 cups sea salt

2 cups Epsom salt

3 tablespoons cascarilla (powdered egg shell)

13 drops sage essential oil or 1/4 fresh sage that has been ripped or cut to release the aroma

2 cups milk (any variety)

Begin by drawing a bath. While the bath is still filling, mix the salts, egg shells, and sage together in a white bowl (white symbolizing purity here). As you do so, empower the mixture with your intent. Place the bowl under the running water and allow the mixture to swirl around until the bowl overflows. Dump the contents into the bath and finish filling the tub. Once the tub is filled, draw a pentacle with your hand above the water and pour the milk through the center of it. In your mind's eye, push the pentacle into the water. If you wish, you can cast a spell over the bathwater or simply state your intention. Hunter has a beautifully written spell that you can find on page 89 and 90 of his book.

Once the milk has been added, you have roughly 30 minutes before the milk sours. The combination of sage and hot water causes this reaction, but you may notice that the worse off you are energetically, the stinker the bath gets. When you are done, drain the water counterclockwise (you can do this by swirling the water counterclockwise a couple of times), seeing all negatively wash away with it. Remember to shower afterwards, allowing the running water to wash away anything that may remain. Do not wash with soap For this particular bath, you should dry off with a white towel to remain pure. Afterward, spend some time in silence, meditating and clearing your mind.

This is a really great way to prepare for hedge riding or to unwind after a particularly stressful day. It's also a great way to cleanse yourself after you have done a deep space clearing in your home. When you deep clean your house and spiritually cleanse it, sometimes stale or negative energies get stuck to you. This bath is a surefire way to flush them away.

3. Practice weather divination, such as nephomancy and chiromancy.

Any form of divination is spirit work, as the messages we receive and interpret come from the spirit world. Every year, cities around the world release a groundhog to predict the coming of Spring. I doubt many of you have access to a groundhog, but there are other forms of weather divination you can practice this time of year. Nephomancy is the art of studying the size and shape of clouds while chiromancy is interpreting the pictures we see in the clouds. On a sunny day, spend some time seeking messages from the clouds. Begin by meditating for a moment or two on your question. Ask your guides to provide you an answer through the clouds. After you are sure your guides have heard you, begin watching those white, fluffy masses move across the sky. Write down what you see and predict in your Grimoire or Book of Shadows. Nephomancy and chiromancy are great ways to hone your divination skills. It will make you a better hedge rider and diviner in the long run, plus who doesn't like watching the clouds. It is so relaxing.

What ways do you connect with the spirit world on Imbolc? Leave your thoughts in the comments below!

#imbolc #spirit work #spirit work for imbolc #spirits #spirit #spirit communication #hedgewitch #hedge witch #witch #pagan #wicca #wiccan #sabbat #witches of tumblr #pagans of tumblr #traditional witchcraft #tradcraft #tradwitch #trad witch

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charlettebffxiv · 6 years

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Prompt #8: Crag

“Left foot, forward. Lift your shoulders. Both hands on the hilt.” Charlette stood, sweating in the high-heat of midsummer. The Head Armsman of the guard, Emille, walking around the group of apprentices as they practiced their stances. With Frederick on her left and Loash in front of her, Charlette was surrounded by two of the best swordsmen amongst her classmates. Needless to say, it was slightly intimidating, the two Hyur had solid builds and practiced stances. Charlette, on the other hand, felt like a grey-blue bean pole swaying in a gust. “Leaping Coeurl.” Emille barked at them, the sound of feet stepping back, swords raising up and the clatter of metal as Brianne dropped her blade for the fifth time. “You are dead, step out of the line.” the Head Armsman sighed out, the gruff Elezen had trained plenty of Order members, seen some of the worst talent Willow’s Heart had to offer and yet he never seemed able to hide the exasperated tone that coated every word. Brianne stalking off and sitting at the side to wait, once again, for the rest of the group to finish their set.

“Tonberry’s Lunge.” they threw a foot forward, taking a long step before jabbing their swords out at an invisible opponent. Charlette had to angle her stab up slightly, for fear of sticking poor Loash in his backside with her considerable reach. “Working Kobold!” they’d raise their swords up in a two-handed grip, bringing them slashing down like they were slamming a pick into the earth. A loud clatter echoed around the Barrack’s yard, a painful shock shooting through Charlette’s arms as the tip of her sword smacked into the stone beneath her. She’d swung too far, the blade bouncing back up and the tip looking a little more blunt than before.

“Bellamy! You are dead, step out with Croffte.” lifting herself up, and striding away to wait next to Brianne, she’d feel the heat at her cheeks. None of them understood the point of humiliating them like this, setting them to the side and forcing them to watch as the others practiced. For Charlette, all it did was frustrate her, Brianne looking no different as they exchanged mutual looks of impatience. “Dravanian Sweep!” the formation stepping back, planting a firm foot behind them as they swung their swords in a long arch in front of them, from left to right. Except Loash, who went from right to left. The large man always had a little trouble remembering which was which, often scribing a small ‘L’ on his left thumb to make sure. The gloves he wore today, however, covered it up and thus.

“Loash! You are dead, and stupid. OUT!” and he’d nod, lifting his shoulders casually as he stepped out and next to Charlette and Brianne. Almost nothing ever bothered the man, his square jaw set and watery, grey eyes free of any frustration. Like he was constantly at peace, or just incredibly simple. “I forgot me sides again.” he’d add as explanation for the other two failures. “We know, we saw Loash.” Brianne’s words coming out kind and informative, no scorn or sarcasm to be found. The short, blond woman was often the most patient of the group, having often dealt with Loash’s stoicism and tendency to state the obvious with kindness. “Never can remember them. Even me mum couldn’ get it in.” he’d rap a knuckle against his head. “We know Loash.” Brianne said, patting the man on a thick shoulder, the three watching in solidarity as the others went back to it.

“Bottom of the Crag!” Emille yelled, his voice raising in tone and annoyance each time he set one of his pupils to the side in shame. The group raising their grip up, pointing the sword down and at an angle in front of them, their stance defensive and sure. “I’ll Crag yer bottom.” both Charlette and Brianne’s heads turned, sudden and surprised by Loash’s comment. The silent Hyur had never, outwardly criticised their trainers. “Gaping Morbol!” “Yer Ma’s a gaping morbol.” it didn’t make sense, but it brought a light, awkward snicker out of the two of them. “Long-step of the Giant!” “Wish ye’d take a long step off a giant cliff.” the two women, holding their sides as Loash unleashed a dead-pan tirade of simple-yet-effective insults towards the Elezen instructor. Quite enough that Emille seemed not to hear it, loud enough that even some of the pupils close to them strained to keep their faces smile-free and their mouths laughless. “Face the Keepers Sorrow!” “I am sorry, fer yer face.” Charlette, unable to master her mirth, snorted through her nose. Quickly covering her face, but the damage was done as A’nidreah burst with a loud “HAH!” shutting her mouth quickly, her ears laying back and her tail curling with the effort to hold the rest in. Frederick was tottering, his sword waving in the difficult stance as he was literally chewing on his lips to keep his laughter in. “A’nidreah! You are dead! Step out!” the Armsman throwing a severe glance at the Miqo’te as she quickly made her way to the group on the side. Her face broke into a wide smile as soon as she had her back to him, shaking her head at Loash while she come over. “Ass.” she’d say to him, under her breath and with an amused and accusatory look. “Yer face is an ass.” all three of them had to clamp hands over their mouths and duck their heads to hide the grins and strained, quiet chuckling.

It was childish, they all knew it, as Loash continued to give them his basic interpretations of the stances. Like they were kids, once again, sitting at the edge of the market after classes and poking fun at the ‘silly adults’ that milled around. It made the boring wait more tolerable, as everyone else successfully finished their stances and were finally allowed to leave for the day. “Corpses! Step-up.” Emille giving them a scathing look as they stepped back into the circle he’d cut into the stone with chalk. “Begin!” All of them taking the beginning stance, feet spread, two-handed grip on their swords, the blades set in front of them. “My Mother, the Gaping Morbol.” Emille said allowed, the sound of it bouncing around the almost empty yard. There was a shocked silence, confused, tense, like a box of scared rats who just realized they’re actually mice. “Oh shite.” was all they heard, Loash muttering in his same, monotone and gruff voice. Emille had heard everything. He’d known what they where doing, what Loash was saying, why they were laugh. “Well?” he’d bark again, the group assuming the Gaping Morbol stance quickly, all of them taught with trepidation. Like at some moment Emille was going to breath fire at them. Emille was circling around the group, stopping once he was standing right next to Loash. His cold, grey eyes looking at the Hyur. Loash, for the record, looked as impassive as ever, even though his eyes darted to Emille, than back, then to Emille again, then forward. “My Long-step off a Giant Cliff!” and they’d take the stance, Loash being the fastest of them all. “Facing the Sorrow of my Unfortunate Features.” they needed a second to decipher that one, but eventually Charlette figured it out, Facing the Keeper’s Sorrow, quickly assuming the stance and the others followed after an awkward wait. Emille now stepping so close to Loash his face was right next to the Hyur’s. “Crag my Bottom, will you?” some of them assumed the stance, others weren’t sure if that was a request. Loash, began to sweat. “Don’t make promises you cannot keep. Boy.” And he worked them, through the evening, into the dark of the night. Until they ached and sweat had dampened their shirts to the point of sticking. Crawling back to the Barracks, each and everyone of them barely had time to wash before collapsing in their bunks. Charlette’s muscles screamed at her, her hands so raw from the rub of her gloves against the grip of her sword she’d not be able to turn the pages in her book, even if she had the energy to read. There was a loud silence between them, as they lay on their backs and tried to ignore the painful cramps wracking their overworked bodies. But Loash, had one more thing to say. “I remembered me sides. Left’s the one tha’ hurts like a buggerin’.” he sounded almost proud, like he’d made great progress. “Shut up Loash.” Brianne’s voice painful and tired.

“Yer face.”

#FFxivWrite2018 #ffxiv writers #ff14 rp #ffxiv rp #charlettebffxiv

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prankprincess123 · 6 years

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D&D mission last night: Break into the mansion of this really pompous other PC noble, and steal all his stuff without being caught.

Our party: A kobold nobleman who is 'friends' with the dude we're stealing from; obsessed with bombs and carries enough explosives on him to level a city block. Human fighter, doesn't really do or say much, mostly just the muscle. And the 'Disaster Kids' aka a CN changeling rogue assassin, a mute CE teifling bard (who according to our {incorrect} interpretation of his sign language is 4yo and named Cabbage) and my CN fire genasi arcane trickster.

--Highlights--

Note hidden under the table: CABBAGE'S MASTER PLAN TO ROB THE STARBORNS! 🤫🔥🔥🏰🔥🔥💍😈👑‼‼‼ Meet here at MIDNIGHT!!!!

---

Kobold: So I'm all for robbing the Starborns, because they're all pompous jerks, but what's the plan?

Disaster Kids talking and miming over eachother: Changeling... Bear Traps... All the shiny stuff! *in unison* and then we burn the place down!

Kobold: *Facepalms*

Human: *sits there staring in horror and confusion*

---

DM: So how are you getting the bear traps?

Changeling: I'm going to go to the market disguised as Lucius Starborn and have the salesman put it on my father's tab.

DM: Ok, you can get all 8 bear traps in stock, but the salesman needs your signature.

Changeling: No he most certainly does not, otherwise my father will be hearing about this! *is handed the bear traps*

---

DM: *turns on heist music*

Disaster Kids: *proceed to jam out till DM turns it off*

---

Kobold: I am here to cook a special meal for my friend Lucius for the holiday! This is my protege who will be helping me! *gestures at Cabbage*

Butler: I'll inform him of your arrival. *10min later giving us a tour of the manor*

Me: What's downstairs?

Butler: *screams and jumps* Who are you, and why are you here?

Me: I'm the living stove.

Kobold: Yes. All food tastes much better when cooked over a living stove. *gives me a WTH look*

Cabbage: *Nods exuberantly*

---

Me: So while these two are cooking, I'm going to check out the basement.

DM: Alone?

Me: Ok, I'm going to take one of the bear traps and launch it down the stairs.

DM: Ok, you hear *proceeds for 5min to make clanging and snapping sounds as the bear trap sets off dozens of other traps on the staircase* and then the sound of the butler running down the stairs from the second story, towards you.

Me: Ok, I jump back into the kitchen.

Kobold: And I put the pan with the steak in it, on her head.

Butler: WHAT WAS THAT CRASH!?!?

Me: Cabbage dropped a pan.

Cabbage: *in the background, proceeds to pick up a pan and launch it against a wall. Then points at it like 'see!'*

---

Changeling: *Now disguised as a Fishman noble PC who isn't there (because his character is like 95% dead after collapsing a mountain on self)*

Guard: My Lord. I'm surprised to see you walking!

Changeling: *withering glare*

Human: As you can see, my lord is in fact walking, but his vocal cords and throat are yet to heal. No thanks to Young Lord Starborn. But all is forgiven, if there is a place for him at tonight's feast.

---

Butler: *talking to 'bodygaurd' as Changling glares at him* I'll speak with you in a minute.

Changeling: *Punches Butler in the face with a 12 attack*

Butler: Your punches have improved vastly my Lord.

---

Me: *Walks right past Lucius Starborn and upstairs*

L.S.: FELUS!

Butler: *runs right past me* Yes.

L.S.: What is this. *gestures at bear trap closed around carpet mere inches from his foot*

Butler: A carpet my lord.

L.S.: I mean under the carpet.

Butler: The floor.

L.S.: I'm aware of that. I mean between the carpet and the floor.

Butler: *trying not to laugh* ...air?

L.S.: Ensure that there aren't any other bear traps in my house!

Butler: *runs up the stairs and right passed me as I'm putting 2 more bear traps under the cushions of arm chairs*

All other party members: *trying to stifle hysterical giggles as they're in the same room as L.S.*

Cabbage: *re-sets bear trap in front of L.S.*

---

Me: I'm going to check out the master bedroom.

DM: The door is locked. Do you have a lockpick?

Me: I'm an arcane trickster whose background is a criminal. Do I have a lockpick? *proceeds to pick lock, steal everything and get locked in the closet, because neither the closet door or bedroom door has an inner handle.*

---

Maid: *triggers bear trap under chair cushion (is not hurt because cushion is still 5in thick when compressed) SCREAMS*

Everyone (except me locked in closet): *comes running*

L.S.: FELIS! WHERE DID ALL THESE BEAR TRAPS COME FROM!?!?!

Butler: I do not know sir.

L.S.: *Goes to sit on other chair. Narrowly jumps away from bear trap.* FIND THEM, AND GET RID OF THEM!!!

Cabbage: *openly grabs both bear traps and takes them downstairs*

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L.S.: *Flops on bed. Bear trap springs on leg. Proceeds to scream and light room on fire.*

Me: *meanwhile in the next room* *light closet door and bedroom door on fire to get out. Sprint out of room in bright red stolen cape, holding bag of all the shiny things from the entire upper floor. Stop and stare at the fire he caused in appreciation. Continue running down to the kitchen.*

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L.S.: *limping around with a bear trap on his thigh* FELIS! Did you find the bear traps!

Butler: *runs in with toothed bear trap closed around broom*

Party in unison: *counts all 8 of our bear traps. (One a mangled ball of metal in the basement. One on L.S.'s leg. One under the carpet in the front room. The rest in Cabbage's cooking bag.* ... That's not our bear trap...

#d&d #playing d&d #d&d party #bear traps #heist #funny conversations

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