#like once he heard a song Jon was working on and chuckled and went ‘aw I hope u dont sound like that god awful video son 😸’

[starlooove]

Jon gives me such guitar vibes

[robinofgothamcity]

♡ prompt: "don’t leave me. don’t you dare leave me.”

♡ pairing: jason todd (redhood) x fem reader

♡ lyric inspiration: "everybody loves somebody sometime. everybody falls in love somehow." 

♡ note: not checked for grammar or spelling mistakes / i wanna note that this doesn’t follow TITANS Jason Todd. you can use whatever version you want. the reason i say this is because the lack of gifs for Jason that Tumblr provides is w a c k.

“don’t bullshit me Jason, I really don’t need you coming up with any kind of excuse on the spot,” you told Jason. he could tell you were being completely serious. you weren’t feigning anything as you looked him straight in the eyes, “i’m done with the excuse and i’m personally done with waiting for someone who doesn’t make time for me.” 

Jason tried grabbing your hand but you immediately took it back. not caring if you were making a scene or not. 

Dick and Tim were in the unfortunate situation of being present for you argument and although they felt kind of awkward being around, they low key wanted to hear the rest of the argument. they felt awful for you but Jason had it coming. 

“don’t leave me. don’t you dare leave me!” Jason screamed. you shook your head, “you did this to yourself, Todd. you don’t get to play the victim in this situation,” you stated before grabbing your bag and exiting Jason’s apartment. 

Tim as well as Dick stood in awkward silence. not knowing whether to comfort Jason or leave. this was the first time in what felt like ages that they have seen Jason so vulnerable. 

you were Jason’s version of normal. although you weren’t a hero or any kind of sidekick, you did help out any of the teams that needed an extra hand at their respective lairs. you had a flair for working computers and knew your way around them when Tim wasn’t available. 

-

a few weeks had passed since your ‘break up’ with Jason. you had helped out the Bat’s a few times within the weeks but you made sure to keep your distance with Jason. whenever he appeared, you went to another section of the Batcave or moved completely to the second level so you wouldn’t even have to run into him. 

today, however; you were hanging around Tim’s team. you were in the mood to bug Connor as you were helping Jon with some of his schoolwork and decided to stick around. you weren’t particularly close with Connor but he did have a soft side with you so you messing with him didn’t necessarily upset him. 

“Tim or Connor, how much would it cost for you to bring me food from the chicken place around the corner?” you asked the two boys. “Connor could probably take you. I don’t think Tim’s moving from his computer anytime soon but I don’t mind piggybacking you there,” Wally said from the other side of the table. 

you huffed, smacking Tim on the side of the head and getting up. 

“well if that’s the case, come on West, you’re taking me,” you said grabbing his shoulder. Tim from the corner of his eye examined your interaction with Wally. you were getting a bit closer to the redhead and he found it a bit weird considering you weren’t close with him while you were with Jason, “hold on,” Wally smirked as he hauled you over onto his back. 

you laughed, holding on tightly as he zoomed out the door. Tim knew it wasn’t any of his business to get involved in relationship drama. he wanted nothing to do with it personally but seeing you close with Wally rubbed him the wrong way for some reason. maybe it was the idea that he still had hope for you to that made him text his adoptive brother. 

“your girl is going out with Wally. they’re going to be at the restaurant by my place if you’re wondering.” 

Jason had been moping around when he wasn’t going on any missions so when he saw Tim texting him, he found it weird within itself. he hardly messaged any of his brothers so receiving one from Tim no less was pretty odd. 

his heart dropped a bit reading the text. he had no idea you were even close with the speedster so to be going on a date with him put him on edge. Jason immediately ran out of his door and booking it on his motorcycle to the restaurant. 

had any police been on the streets, Jason would’ve received copious amount of tickets by the way he was speeding but he could have cared less. he arrived to the restaurant in due time. he saw you sitting down, eating with Wally as the two of you were basically scarfing down the food in front of you. 

Jason felt a pang to his chest as he watched you talk with Wally like nothing was wrong. he had never seen you so care free before. even when the two of you went out for a date or something, he felt so on edge thinking that something could happen to you. 

Jason didn’t want to sound more problematic than he already was but he felt a feeling of possessiveness hit him seeing you with Wally. like he didn’t want you going out with anyone that wasn’t him. his eye twitched every time Wally made you laugh or whenever you reached over to smack or touch him. 

eventually, he saw you and Wally getting up from the table. he quickly hopped on his motorcycle and drove back to his place, more upset than he thought he would be. 

he shot Tim a text back, thanking him for letting him knowing. 

Jason had heard a few days ago that you were planning on going out with a few of your friends with a club in Gotham and that happened to be today. he knew that following you to whatever club you were going too would be wrong but with the way he was feeling, he didn’t care. he was coming along..even if he had to hide in the crowd. 

he inched his way back to your place a few hours later to see you already getting dressed. you were wearing one of Jason’s favorite outfits and that alone made him want to go over to you and remind you that you were his. (WHY DID THIS GO SO YANDERE ALL OF A SUDDEN PFT).

the funny thing in all of this was that he saw you slip in some crocs into your bag. he knew you hated wearing shoes let alone heels so to see you probably change into them through the night made him chuckle. 

once you got into your car and made your way into Gotham to the club you were meeting your friends at, he walked in through the side and stood in the corner as he watched you get ID’d and walk inside. all of you were sitting at a table and ordering your first round of drinks. you downed a shot of whatever you had ordered before grabbing your friends hand taking her out into the dance floor. 

Jason walked in a bit closer but making sure to stay hidden. he saw you just dancing with your friend and couldn’t help but gulp. the way you were dancing and grinding up against your friend would have had him dragging you to the nearest bathroom for getting him riled up. (insert gif above)

he remained watching you until he noticed a guy approaching you. the guy was on the taller side, greasy hair flopping to the side of his face, and his clothes looked like he hadn’t changed out of it in days. 

“really, I’m fine. I don’t dance with people I don’t know,” you stated as you friend pulling you away. the guy quickly grabbed your other hand, “c’mon, one dance?” you shook him off, stating once again that you weren’t interested before walking back to the table. 

Jason, although the interaction was minor, was seeing red. he waited until the guy left to catch him in the single bathroom, leaving him bloody and bruised. he looked down to the guy before chuckling, “you should really learn what no means,” he spat before leaving. 

by the time he entered the floor again, you were already back on the floor dancing. you were dancing with another friend as you sipped on a drink and minded your business. it took a few internal screams to remind himself that he couldn’t just walk over to you and take you by the hand but almost after that, he heard commotion coming from the other end of the bar. 

closer to where you were.

Jason walked slowly to make sure shit didn’t get out of hand. you didn’t even realize that an entire fight had broken out by you as you were too busy singing to the song that was playing. it wasn’t until you heard gunshots that made you flinch and realize that shit was going down. 

you grabbed your friend, screaming at them to forget their things as you took everything the Bats had told you about situations like this and basically run for your life. you ran to the nearest exit before hearing gunshots going off again. this time, you tried ducking but it was far too late. you felt an impact against your left shoulder blade.

the gunshot immediately made you fall onto the ground as Jason practically sprinted to you. you weren’t even conscious enough to realize what was going on anymore but as you tried to get up to run once again, you felt yourself get pistol whipped on the nose as you fell again. 

Jason finally made it towards you after he signaled the Outlaws and even the some of the Bats to make their way to the club. you were trying your best to keep your eyes open but they were slowly starting to fall shut. 

“hey! hey! don’t fall asleep on me,” you heard Jason’s panicked voice. you laughed, leaning against him, “of course you would’ve followed me here but Jay, I’m kinda tired,” you whispered as your eyes fell completely shut. Jason shook you again as he tried to make sure you stayed awake, “don’t leave me. don’t you fucking leave me!” he screamed. 

it took a few minutes but eventually, the paramedics came in and got you onto a stretcher as Tim, Roy, and for some odd reason, Damian walked inside. they saw your state of being and looked to Jason. 

“a fight broke out and one of them shot off with gunshots. she got shot on the shoulder and hit with the gun to the nose,” he explained as he watched the ambulance put you inside. he knew...he hoped that you would make it out okay because he had some business to take care of before he went to visit you in the hospital, “I’ll be back,” he growled, getting up and running out the door. 

Roy, Tim, and Damian looked at each other realizing what he was about to do. they quickly followed him out the door but by the time they reached him, he was already running down the darkened ally, trailing what they assumed were the people that hurt you. 

Jason managed to tackle them to the floor, getting the ring leader as he stepped on the guys throat. he made sure not to make him pass out as he wanted the guy to feel his punches. Jason was big. size comparison to Superman so the punches to the face felt unearthly. 

“JASON STOP!” Tim screamed as Roy grabbed his best friend along with Damian, “if you get caught up in all this, you won’t be able to visit her. stop!” he yelled as he asked Roy to keep him calm, “go to the hospital. Roy can even take you but Robin and I have this,” he continued. 

he wanted to argue but for the first time in his life, Jason actually listened. he knew that he would get nothing by spending the night in a jail cell. Roy let him go when he realized that Jason was calm enough and let him to his motorcycle to follow you to the hospital. 

Jason got to the hospital about a half hour later. he immediately ran to the front desk, screaming your name to the receptionist who flinched back in fear. she walked him slowly to the room where you were at and informed him that you weren’t severely injured and most of the damage was on the nose. the blood you had lost was already getting pumped back into you. 

he saw you asleep on the bed as he pulled the chair up to your bed. Jason had never saw you this way before and frankly, it scared the shit outta him. he never wanted to see you this way again. 

without realizing, Jason had fallen asleep on the chair with his hand holding yours. it wasn’t until you actually woke up to see Jason asleep that you slowly shook him awake. Jason jumped up in fright and when he saw that you were awake, a sigh of relief was released. 

“how are you feeling? do you need anything?” he asked as you shook your head, “why did I know you would follow me to the club tonight?” you said with a tired smile. Jason shrugged, “you know how hard it is for me to quit you,” he confessed. 

while you did want to keep up your anger towards him, you weren’t even in the mood to start arguing with him. “Jason, seriously?” you said, not knowing what to say. Jason checked the door to make sure it was closed before basically hovering over you, “I can’t lose you. I just can’t. you’re the only thing that makes me feel normal. I know I wasn’t prioritizing you but I just can’t see you with anyone else. seeing you with Wally earlier almost made me want to kill him. I swear, I’ll start being better. I’ll make sure to make time for you but please, don’t leave me,” he yelled but softly. 

you had never heard Jason so vulnerable before, “wait, how did you know I was with Wally earlier?” you asked. Jason smiled sheepishly, knowing he was about to rat Tim out, “Tim might’ve told me,” he said. you squinted your eyes, “that asshole,” you said. 

“Jay, it’s hard to believe that when this isn’t the first time its happened. I just, I can’t be put in third or fourth place anymore. I see the way Dick and his girlfriend are and he still makes time for her and I always question why can’t you do the same!” you replied. Jason nodded understandingly, “I know but please, please trust me. one more chance and if I screw this up, you have every right to leave me for good,” he said almost immediately. 

you sighed, thinking for a few moments, “fine. one more chance and if you ruin it, it’s over. I won’t care what you say or do to try and get me back,” you threatened as Jason sighed in relief. 

he bent down for a kiss that had went longer than usual. it was getting steamier by the second but before you could continue, you heard a knock on the door indicating that the nurse or a doctor realized you were awake, “later, I promise. you’ll have enough time for this when you nurse me back to health,” you whispered making Jason laugh, “good because the way you were dancing with your friend might’ve turned me on more than I want to admit,” he said. 

you rolled your eyes as Jason sat back down on the chair as the doctor walked in. 

[daveeddiggsit]

No Return

Note: so this is not a new fic. i actually posted it back in 2017 (but deleted all my smut from this blog about a year afterwards haha we love being impulsive). but i’m over myself now, so i’m reposting! a lot of you have been asking about it, so... here you go. posted for all of y’all to enjoy again.

Word Count: 4.7k

Pairing: Daveed Diggs x Reader

Warnings: smut. cursing.

Summary: Diggs loses a bet which results in him owing you a lap dance.

Parties at Rafa’s place were always the best; the drinks were great, the music was amazing, the atmosphere was never dull, but the best part about them were the incredible people that made up each one; you were never bored. There was always something to do whether you were talking to people, dancing, playing drinking games, or just drinking in general. And that’s why whenever you were told that there was going to be a party at Rafael Casal’s apartment, you never turned it down...even if you ended up showing up late.

“Well, look at who finally decided to show up.” You heard a familiar voice say as you walked through the door to Rafa’s place. Daveed grinned widely at you before he slid an arm around your shoulders, pulling you close to him as you walked deeper into the apartment. “My favorite!”

Daveed was one of your closest friends and if you were being honest, it would have been a lie if you said you didn’t want him to become something more than that. The two of you often flirted and were constantly together (these occurrences happened so often that there were many times people believed you were dating), but neither of you had made a real move. You knew how you felt toward him, and he was giving you signs that he felt the same way, but no true actions were made by either party. So that’s why it stayed the way it was between you two: just close friends who often flirted with each other.

“Aw, I’m your favorite?” You asked, raising your voice so he could hear you over the loud music that was pumping through Rafa’s speakers.

“Uh, yeah,” he stated as if it was obvious, “but don’t tell anyone else. It’s a secret between you and me.” He whispered in your ear as you entered the kitchen.

Yeah, he had definitely downed a few drinks before you got here.

“Diggs, I’m pretty sure everyone heard you when you shouted it.” You laughed as you plucked the cup half-full of alcohol from his grasp, draining it of its contents. He pouted at you once you handed him back an empty cup.

“Y/N, hey! It’s been forever since I’ve seen you!” Adrienne said from beside Rafa who was pouring out a few drinks.

“Hey!” You pulled away from Daveed’s grasp to give her a hug. She’d been away in Canada for the last few weeks shooting for a new project she was working on. “I’ve missed you! Why’d you have to leave me alone to deal with these boys for so long?”

Adrienne laughed while Rafael furrowed his eyebrows.

“Oh, so you didn’t miss me? I see how it is, Y/N, I see how it is.” He feigned hurt, before pushing a couple of newly filled cups towards you and Daveed.

You rolled your eyes at him. “We had lunch a few days ago, Cash, it hasn’t been that long since I’ve seen you.”

“But so much has changed since then.”

You chuckled before taking a sip. “Like what? Did you finally finish that song you’ve been working on?”

“No.” Rafael replied before he smiled at Adrienne beside him. “Unlike Diggs, I am no longer a single and lonely Bay Boy.”

Daveed’s eyebrows furrowed as he cocked his head. “Yo, who said I was lone—?”

“You guys are finally together? Oh my god, congrats!” You cut in with widened eyes.

They both grinned at each other before Rafa leaned down to kiss her forehead.

“Aww,” you gushed, “you two are couple goals already.”

A few seconds passed before you felt Daveed’s arm drape around your shoulders again.

“You know, we could be couple goals too.” He said, looking down at you with a smirk.

You rolled your eyes, pushing him away. “Ha, you wish, Diggs.”

You laughed it off because you knew he was too tipsy to be serious. He always flirted with you like this, but why did this time feel so different?

A few drinks later, you were beginning to feel the familiar light-hearted, buzzing feeling course throughout your body, giving you a boost of energy. You had drifted away from Daveed and Rafa to roam through the house and catch up with people you hadn’t seen since your Hamilton days. You were talking with Adrienne and Ari when you heard your name being called from behind you.

“Aye, Y/L/N!”

You turned your head to see Daveed standing next to a table a few feet away. 

“Diggs!” You responded in the same playful tone.

He grinned at you before waving you over. “Come play Flip Cup with me.”

“Really?” You quirked an eyebrow. “You lose every time you play against me, D.”

“I’m feeling confident today. I’ve been practicing.”

You tried not to laugh as you rose from your seat and approached him. “Practicing?”

“Bruh,” Rafa snickered at his friend from the other end of the table. “You played a few games before this and won two in a row. That ain’t practicing.”

You let a smug grin show up on your face as you glanced back up at your best friend. “Daveed, I am the queen of Flip Cup, okay? You can’t beat me. Nobody ever has, and nobody ever will. That’s a fact.”

“I’m pretty sure I can beat you today, Y/N.” He said bluntly. Wow, he was forward when he was drunk. “I have a good feeling about this.”

“Ha,” you huffed out a laugh, “wanna bet?"

“What do you propose, oh mighty Queen of Flip Cup?”

You thought for a second. What was something you knew would make him think twice about challenging you? Something that would make him step down from this newfound cockiness he embodied.

When the idea formed in your head, you sent him a sly grin. “Winner gets a lap dance from the loser.”

You distinctly remembered an earlier conversation with him where he stated that he couldn’t dance. You knew it was untrue due to the times you’d seen him dance at the club or during some of the numbers in Hamilton, but you also knew that the wager wasn’t something he’d necessarily jump on (despite the confidence boost the alcohol had supplied him).

Rafa led the mini crowd that had formed around you in a chorus of “ooo”s.

“Deal.”

You looked up at Daveed in surprise. You hadn’t expected him to agree to the terms so easily.

“Diggs, that means if you lose— sorry, when you lose, you have to give me a lap dance.”

“I know.” He said seriously.

“And you’re good with that?”

“If it happens, which it won’t because I’m gonna win, then yes.” He stated, his mouth forming into a confident smile. “I’m good with that.”

Fine, he wanted a challenge? You were going to give him one.

“Alright, then.” You said, narrowing your eyes at him. “Game on."

⋆﹥━━━━━━━   ♛   ━━━━━━━﹤⋆

Daveed lost. Badly.

So badly, in fact, that you actually felt bad for him. So you tweaked it so it was the best out of five games...and even then, he still lost.

Oh well, it’s not like you didn’t warn him.

When the third game ended and Daveed realized his defeat, he threw his head back and groaned.

“Aww, don’t be such a sore loser. You lost fair and square, Diggs. ” You teased with a smile, wrapping your arms around his torso to hug him from behind. “I warned you. I told you I was the queen of Flip Cup, but you didn’t listen.”

“Those cups were rigged, Y/N.” He stated, turning around in your grasp so he could hug you back.

You laughed, rolling your eyes. “Say whatever you want to make yourself feel better. Nothing’s gonna change the fact that you owe me a lap dance.”

He was quiet for a moment before he murmured something. “You know I can’t dance, right?”

“First of all, yes you can. And secondly, lap dances are different, Diggs.”

“No, they’re not.”

“Yes they are. And if you don’t think they’re different, you dance at parties all the fucking time. You should be able to handle an easy lap dance.”

He lifted his head back up from your shoulder to look down at you. “But Y/N...”

You let out a laugh before you patted his cheek lightly. “You dug yourself into this hole, loser. Guess you’re just gonna have to figure it out because you’re not getting out of this one.”

⋆﹥━━━━━━━   ♛   ━━━━━━━﹤⋆

The next day you woke up to someone knocking on your door. In sweats and an old t-shirt, you made your way over to unlock it, squinting your eyes to adjust to the bright light. The slight hangover you had wasn’t really helping you get out of your groggy state.

“Daveed?” You asked, realizing who your visitor was once your vision adjusted. “What are you doing here so early?”

He was dressed in a yellow Oaklandish tank top that showed off his toned arms/shoulders and dark blue jeans with a brown belt buckled just enough to let them sit loosely on his hips. You also noticed that he decided to rock his glasses today.

You snapped your eyes up to his and away from his figure that left you breathless. You totally had not just checked him out.

“If your definition of early is 2 o’clock in the afternoon, I think you may need to reevaluate some things and consider fixing that sleep schedule of yours.” He replied with his lips turning up into an amused grin.

“Shut up, I had a late night last night.” You mumbled, turning around to walk away, leaving the door open so he could let himself into your apartment. “And you did too. I’m surprised you’re not asleep right now.” You glanced back at him to see him shrug.

“I had to meet Bill and Jon at the studio at 10. I’ve been up since, like, 9:30.”

“Damn, Diggs, you’re gonna have to teach me your ways.”

“Caffeine.” He chuckled, putting on his signature grin. “It works miracles.”

You returned the smile, before sending him a curious look. “So, why are you here? Not that I mind or anything, it’s good to see you, but you haven’t been over in like a month and a half.”

“Exactly! It’s been awhile since we’ve hung out alone, so I thought it’d be dope if we chilled and watched movies or something.” He replied before he went to ramble on. “I mean— only if you want to. If you’re really tired, I can leave so you can get some more sl—”

“No, no, it’s fine! That sounds great.” You cut him off and placed a hand on one of his toned arms to reassure him. 

“You sure?”

“Yeah!” You responded. “Just let me take a quick shower and we can start in like 20ish minutes.”

“A 20 minute shower counts as a quick shower?” He questioned with a teasing look.

“Yes,” you said, “or would you rather it be 45ish minutes?”

“20ish minutes is good. Have fun with your quick shower. Though, I think it would be more fun if I joined.” A tiny but noticeable smirk made its way onto Daveed’s face.

You laughed when he sent you a playful wink, dropping your hand from his arm to walk towards your room. “You wish, Daveed Diggs.”

“You have no idea.” He mumbled under his breath (inaudible to your ears) before he let his eyes follow your retreating figure.

“Maybe you could set up the movie in the meantime? It’s your turn to choose. The remote’s on the coffee table and you know where the popcorn and shit is in the kitchen. I’ll be out soon. If you need anything, yell.” You said before closing the door to your room.

Daveed sent a thumbs up in your direction even though he knew you couldn’t see it before he made his way to your living room.

Little did you know, Daveed had something else planned.

⋆﹥━━━━━━━   ♛   ━━━━━━━﹤⋆

When you emerged from your shower, you quickly dried yourself and combed through your now damp hair. After that, you exited your room and entered your living room to see that it was completely dark. Confused, you surveyed the room to look for your best friend, but there was no sign of him at all.

Did he leave? If he did, he didn’t text you or anything to let you know.

“D?” You called out, walking further into the room.

With each step you took, the more you realized how this seemed like a scene from a horror film. You weren’t a fan of them, but a few months back Daveed and Rafael had pretty much forced you to have a scary movie marathon with them.

“Daveed Diggs, I swear to God. If you’re trying to scare me right now, I will—”

You squeaked when a pair of arms snaked their way around your waist from behind. Daveed’s voice had come seemingly from out of nowhere. “You’ll what?”

“Kick your ass.” You glared at him, quickly turning around to push him away. “What the hell is wrong with you?!”

He laughed, smiling brightly. “I’m sorry, Y/N.”

“No, you’re not.” You grumbled, moving to sit on your couch. Daveed followed you.

“You right. It was so worth it.” He grinned at you, causing you to roll your eyes at him. You tried to stay mad at him, but it was damn near impossible when he was looking at you like that.

“We’re not friends anymore.” You stated, crossing your arms.

“What, why?” He asked, his grin dropping into a pout.

“You were mean to me, Diggs! How dare you scare me in my own home!” You were laughing internally.

“Okay, fine. I’m sorry for real this time. What can I do to make it up to you?”

When he asked, you contemplated it for a few moments before you looked up at him with a smirk.

“What?” He asked.

“Well, you still owe me that lap dance…”

He groaned, closing his eyes and letting his head fall back on the couch. “I thought you forgot about that.”

“Nope.” You said, your smirk forming into a smug grin. You had the upper hand now. “How could I forget you losing a bet against me, resulting in a lap dance from the great Daveed Diggs himself?”

After a couple of seconds, he sighed, opening his eyes and tilting his face towards you. “If I do this now, will I win back your friendship?”

“I’ll think about it.” You said, causing him to give you a deadpanned look. You laughed before you spoke again. “Yeah, I guess we could be friends again. But it has to be good.”

Daveed sighed again before he straightened himself up. “I don’t even know how to give a good lap dance, Y/N.”

“Improvise. C’mon, D, you’re great at improv. Treat it like you treat a freestyle. Just go with the flow.” You smiled widely at him.

“Fine.” He said, getting up from his spot next to you. “But I’m only pulling through with this because I like you.”

“Aww, you like me?” You asked teasingly to mask the actual feeling that was coursing through you. You continued to grin at him as he pulled out his phone to scroll through his music library. When he finally settled on a song by The Weeknd, he turned to you once he pressed play.

“Do I start now?”

“Yes,” you laughed. “C’mon, you know how a lap dance works. You’re not a novice when it comes to these things, stop fucking around.”

You could see him smile and rub his arm before he looked away for a second. When he started to slowly sway to the beat of the song, it was extremely hard for you to stifle your laugh. Your best friend was about to give you a lap dance and you could not take him seriously.

He continued to dance to the beat for a bit as he stared you down with a smirk. He was doing this shit on purpose. He was joking around until you couldn’t contain your laughter any longer.

“Diggs, I can’t take you seriously like this. I can—” You wheezed. “I just can’t.”

Your laughter and the slow, sexy beats of the music were the only audible things in your apartment until Daveed spoke again. 

“Are you ready for me, Y/N?” His smooth, low voice washed over you.

You let out yet another giggle. “Don’t make it sound so sexual.”

“It's supposed to sound sexual, Y/N, it’s a fucking lap dance.” He chuckled, now standing directly in front of you.

“Alright, show me what you got, Bay Boy.”

You continued to laugh at him as you watched him, but the moment he straddled your lap, you stopped. His arms were on each side of your head, using the couch to steady himself over you as his hips began to slowly grind against you. That’s when the atmosphere in the room completely changed.

Your eyes widened slightly when you saw him bite his bottom lip in concentration. When you envisioned Daveed giving you a lap dance the night prior, you didn’t think it would be like this...it was flustering you more than you thought it would. Before you knew it, you were struggling to control your movements. Your fists were clenching and unclenching as you so desperately tried to keep them anchored to your sides.

As if he had read your mind, Daveed murmured, “You can touch me, Y/N. Don’t be afraid.”

If you weren’t turned on before, you definitely were now. His gravelly voice paired with his hot breath right next to your ear caused you to shiver, making goosebumps appear across your entire body.

Then, you finally let your hands wander. They traveled up his chest to rest on his shoulders, then back down again to move under the hem of his tank top so you could feel his bare and strong torso. Sure it was a bold move, but the more and more Daveed grinded on you, the less and less you cared. When his tank top rode up to the point where you could see all of his abs, he paused to stand up and quickly get rid of the article of clothing before he came back to straddle you again. 

Your heart was beating wildly in your chest as you looked up at your best friend. He looked undeniably attractive when he was on top of you shirtless and with his glasses on. Every feeling you had ever felt for him came crashing down on you at that moment and that’s when you just about lost your self-control. Part of your brain was screaming at you, saying that you were about to cross a line that you could never cross again...but at the same time, all of your cares had disappeared.

You used your newfound courage to cup Daveed’s face in both of your hands and pull him into a deep kiss. He gasped softly, surprised at the sudden contact, but quickly eased into it. 

You had just passed the point of no return.

You didn’t know what to expect when you decided to kiss him, but it was better than you could have imagined. When you pulled back, his mouth was slightly dropped in awe and one of the sides slowly twitched up into a soft smile. (It was kind of adorable.)

“Daveed, I like you.” You blurted, short of breath.

His face broke out into a full grin. “I like you too, Y/N.” 

“No,” you shook your head, moving your hands from his cheeks down to his shoulders. “I mean like— like like you.”

“I know,” he chuckled. “I mean, I figured given what just happened a few seconds ago. Why didn’t you tell me earlier?”

You shrugged, breaking eye contact with him. You subconsciously traced one of your thumbs across his collarbone. “I was afraid of rejection, I guess.”

“Are you serious?”

“What?” You asked, sounding offended.

Daveed caught your gaze again, pushing a strand of your hair behind your ear. “Y/N, I’ve had like the biggest fuckin’ crush on you since Ari introduced us.”

“Wait, really?”

“Mhm,” he hummed. “I’m actually really surprised you didn’t notice.”

“Why didn’t you tell me about your crush earlier, Diggs?” You voiced, giving him a pointed look.

He gave you a shy smile when he moved off of you to sit beside you, still facing you. “Same reason as you.”

“You know what? I’m not even mad about not knowing sooner.” You said. “I’m glad we found out like this.”

“You’re just happy I gave you a lap dance with my amazing skills.” He teased with a laugh of his own.

You laughed again, and pushed at his chest so he could lay on his back and let you crawl on top of him to straddle his waist. “Not gonna lie, I didn’t think you had it in you, Diggs.”

His jaw dropped completely as he looked up at you. “But you said that I could do a lap dance when even I said I couldn’t!”

“That’s true, but to be fair, I never said you couldn’t do a lap dance. I just didn’t think you’d do as well as you did.”

Your response brought yet another smile to his face as you leaned closer to him. “I’mma take that as a compliment.” He said softly.

At this point, the song Daveed had chosen had ended a while ago and the lap dance was long over.

“Good.” You responded before you kissed him again.

This one was different from the first. It started off soft, but quickly turned passionate and heated. As your mouths moved against each other, Daveed’s hands moved from your hips up to the hem of your shirt, his fingertips grazing your bare sides, leaving goosebumps in their wake. The only word you could use to describe this feeling was just complete bliss.

When you reached down to Daveed’s belt buckle, he shivered, causing you to smile against his lips.

Then he pulled away, panting. “Y/N…” he breathed. “Are you sure about this? You don’t have to— fuck.” He cursed as you pulled back completely to unbuckle his pants. “I don’t wanna push y—” 

“Daveed,” You said, before pausing quickly to put a hand on his scruff, tenderly moving your thumb to caress his cheek. “I’m absolutely sure about this. Now please, shut the hell up so I can blow you.”

You smirked when you saw his eyes widen and when you crawled off of him to go in between his legs, you heard a quiet, “Okay.”

Wasting no more time, you removed his jeans and boxers to free his erection. You could see Daveed’s chest begin to rise and fall quicker when you took his length into your hand and pressed a kiss to the tip of it.

��Oh, shiiit.” He drawled softly when your mouth wrapped around him, slowly sucking your way down as far as you could. As you began to bob your head up and down, Daveed’s breathing increased with each suck and occasional flick of your tongue.

Now, he was fully panting. He lifted his head up to look down at you, causing him to groan. After a minute or two, he brought a hand down to move some strands of hair out of your face.

“Fuck, Y/N,” he babbled, “I...I shouldn’t...oh God, I shouldn’t be this fucking close.”

You slowly pulled off of him and he brought you back up to kiss him again.

“You,” Daveed breathed against your lips, “are way too fucking good at that.”

You grinned.

“And,” he continued, “this clothing situation is a bit unbalanced, don’t you think?” 

His thumbs grazed the waistband of your sweatpants. When you nodded, you pulled them down along with your underwear. You moved off of him to take them off completely and remove your shirt and bra, leaving you just as bare as he was.

You climbed back on top of him, straddling his washboard abs, when he ushered you to move up. You obeyed, moving forward an inch or two, but Daveed shook his head and grabbed your thighs, moving you himself.

“Daveed, what are you doing?”

“Returning the favor.” He said simply, bringing you over to his face.

“Oh,” you breathed when you felt his tongue lightly touch your clit.

The man’s mouth worked miracles from between your thighs. Daveed kept you still above his skilled tongue, occasionally giving your ass a squeeze.

“D-Daveed,” you gasped, your mouth forming a perfect ‘O’ as his tongue lightly circled your clit before he brought fully into his mouth to suck gently.

This was the best head you’d gotten...well ever, actually. He wanted you to feel the best you’d ever felt and he definitely achieved that.

Before you knew it, you were reaching your high, climaxing as you shouted Daveed’s name, not caring how loud it echoed throughout your apartment. When you crawled back down Daveed’s body, the two of you shared a sloppy kiss as you both breathed heavily.

Although you just came, you weren’t completely satisfied. You still wanted him... needed to feel him inside you.

You moved to position yourself above his cock, but he made you pause before you could do so.

“Y/N, stop,” Daveed panted. “Condom.”

“Don’t need it.” You replied quickly. “I’m on the pill.”

“Oh, fuck yes.” He replied, releasing you so you could resume what you were about to do.

You breathed out a laugh before you slowly sank down onto his length, making both you and him release a groan. 

“You are so fucking gorgeous,” he gasped. “You don’t know how long I’ve waited for this.”

Your fingers ghosted along his stubble-ridden jaw. “I think I have an idea.”

When you adjusted to his size, you began to bounce and he helped you, meeting each of your thrusts as he guided your hips onto him.

Your lips met Daveed’s yet again and you captured every moan that fell from his mouth, he did the same for you. As your pace quickened, so did each grunt, pant, and moan. You felt your pussy begin to clench again like it had when you came before.

“I’m gonna come,” Daveed said quickly against your mouth.

“Fuck.” You groaned. “Me too, D.”

“Come for me, sweetheart.” He breathed, bringing a hand up from your hip to cup your cheek. “You can do it.”

And you did.

Your walls clenched around him and you gasped, letting your orgasm wash over you in waves. Daveed came shortly after you, and continued to thrust, riding the both of you through your highs.

As you came down and pulled yourself off him, you collapsed, exhausted, halfway leaning on him and halfway laying on your couch. You moved a hand up to rest on his chest again, closing your eyes in bliss as you relaxed against him.

After a minute or two of silence, Daveed broke it.

“Wait, so...does this mean we’re friends again?” 

You looked up at him with a raised eyebrow. He was still on that? Wow, what a dork. “After this? Everything that just happened?” You asked bewildered. “God, I hope not.”

“Fine,” he said letting his signature bright smile show up on his face, still breathing heavily. “More than friends?”

Your heart fluttered in your chest and you grinned widely back at him. You leaned up to softly kiss his jaw before you gave him your answer.

“Way more than just friends, D.”

[miafic]

Fall AU (Part 11)

first ~ prev

thank you for waiting so patiently!!! :)

---

“We need to talk about something,” Zakk said quietly to himself. Water cascaded around him, and he ran his fingers through his wet hair, making sure all the shampoo was gone. He tried again. “I have something I need to tell you. No…” He sighed. Maybe it’d be better to just wing it.

Just then, he heard the distant sound of Baby’s bark. That was… odd. Baby usually didn’t bark at anything. Moments later, the bathroom door opened with no warning. 

“Lucas?” Zakk asked sharply. Instinctively, he angled his body away.

He was met with only the sounds of weak crying.

“What’s wrong?”

Lucas softly replied, but Zakk couldn’t hear him over the sound of the water.

“Okay, hang on, hang on,” Zakk murmured, and he turned the shower off and stepped out, reaching for his towel. But before he made contact with it, Lucas slid forward and hugged him.

“Oh, no,” Zakk hissed, but Lucas didn’t move back. He just stood and cried into Zakk’s shoulder. “Lucas, I’m soaking wet,” Zakk pleaded, “and this is so inappropriate. I don’t have clothes on-”

“I don’t care,” Lucas told him tearfully.

“Yeah, but it feels like you’re one of the kids,” Zakk explained a little urgently, pushing Lucas off, covering his crotch with one hand, and holding out the other. “Can you give me my towel, please? Please? Right now?”

Lucas did, and Zakk hastily wrapped it around his waist, tucking it in securely and drying his hands on it before reaching out to touch Lucas’ shoulders. “Why are you crying?”

“I feel… sad.”

Zakk frowned. “You feel sad?”

Lucas nodded. “Really, really sad.” His bottom lip poked out a little.

“Why do you feel sad?”

Lucas shook his head, tears flooding his eyes again. “I don’t know,” he said frustratedly, and he turned around, quietly sobbing.

The fact that he turned away solidified for Zakk that this was 100% real emotion. He wasn’t just seeking comfort or a hug; he was truly upset about something.

“Are you sure you don’t know? It’s okay if you just don’t want to tell me. I won’t be mad.”

“No, I - I don’t know. I just had too many feelings.”

Zakk nodded. “Okay. What do you want to do?”

Lucas looked over his shoulder at him questioningly.

“Well,” Zakk said patiently, “you came up here to tell me that you’re upset. What were you hoping would happen?”

“I guess I… Um, I want to get in your bed with you.”

Zakk nodded. “Okay. Let me get some clothes on really quick, and then I’d be happy to. Go out and wait for me?”

Lucas nodded back and exited the bathroom, shoulders drooping as he went.

Exhaling heavily, Zakk and went to the closet to get dressed. When he walked into the bedroom, he found Lucas and Baby together on the bed. Lucas was still crying.

Gently, Zakk murmured, “What’s wrong, hmm?” 

“Where’s our daughter?” Lucas asked tearfully.

Zakk blinked. “What?”

“Madelyn. Where is she?”

Zakk stared at him for several seconds. “Lucas, we don’t have a daughter.”

“Yes, we do! I see her in my dreams. Her name is Madelyn, and sometimes she’s big and sometimes she’s little. Sometimes she cries, and when I give her a hug, she feels better.”

Zakk brushed Lucas’ hair back from his face.

“I miss her so bad. Are you hiding her like you hid Baby?”

“No,” Zakk promised. “We really don’t have a daughter.”

“She’s real!”

“That’s not what I said,” Zakk countered calmly. “I didn’t say she’s not real. But we don’t have a daughter.”

“I see her in my dreams,” Lucas repeated sadly, and he wiped at his face.

Zakk frowned.

“And I miss my little brother. And I miss my big sister. And you were in the shower, so I missed you.”

That marked the first time Lucas had mentioned Isabel, but since the chances of her getting to a phone were slim, Zakk hadn’t commented on her. He wasn’t even sure if she knew what was going on. Lucas’ parents knew, but Isabel probably didn’t. It didn’t seem to matter, though, because Lucas had already moved on to the next thing.

“I had another dream, but not about Madelyn. It was about me and you.”

“Oh?”

Lucas nodded. “We were in the garage. You were yelling at me really loud, but not because you were mad. You were scared.”

“I was scared?”

“Yeah.” He pouted a little. “I was going to do something bad, and you caught me.”

“What?”

“I don’t remember.”

“Well,” Zakk said slowly, “I don’t think I’ve ever yelled at you.”

“It’s okay. I probably wouldn’t remember if you did.” Lucas pushed his lips out like he wanted a kiss and gave Zakk a questioning look.

Zakk just lightly covered Lucas’ mouth with his fingers. “No kisses,” Zakk whispered.

“Can we watch the show?”

“Yeah. But hey - I gotta talk to you about something first.”

“What?”

Zakk grimaced. “I… I have to go back to work. Tomorrow.”

“Oh, okay.”

“Okay?” Zakk echoed, a little surprised.

“Yeah.” He tilted his head as he studied Zakk’s face. “I’ll miss you. But I’ll be okay. I’ll take care of Baby for you.”

“You can call me any time, alright? Whenever you need anything. And... one of my friends is coming over, so you won’t be alone. He’s really nice. He’ll love you.”

Lucas nodded. “Kay. Can we watch the show now if I can’t have a kiss?”

Zakk blew air out of his nostrils. “Yeah, yeah. I’m surprised you’re not trying to kiss Jon Snow.”

“Yeah, well… He’s next best.”

“After who?”

“You.”

Zakk chuckled and gave Lucas a squeeze.

—-

Where is Madelyn? Our daughter. I don’t know how old she is. I miss her. Sometimes she gets in our bed when she has bad dreams and we make her feel safe. I tell the man not to let her sleep with us but he does and I don’t move her away because that’s mean. I think I’m a good dad. I know the man is a great dad. He always picks her up from preschool while I type on a computer. When she gets big I regret getting her because I want a different path for her than the one we accidentally gave her. The man tells me we did everything right, but it hurts when we were so careful not to make a single misstep and then somebody else ruins it all.

Writing this down is making me remember what happened to her and I feel sick. I’m glad I was there to hold her hand and talk her through the time at the hospital but I’m sorry that she hurt herself afterwards and had to go to the other hospital. That was the worst time in my life. But the man says we don’t have a daughter. I hope he’s right.

I tried olives today and I didn’t like them. The man says I used to, and he seemed worried that I don’t now. He didn’t cry, though, so that was a good thing. I cried because I got too many thoughts all at once, and I went in the bathroom and he was naked. It made my stomach feel kind of nice. He’s not as big as me in his private area, but I think I like his more than mine.

Zakk let out a shocked laugh before continuing to the next paragraph.

There was a song playing in my head today in a different language but I know it was my sister’s. I can’t remember her name, but I know that she makes me happy. She used to pick me and my little brother up from high school sometimes when she was home, and we would listen to music in the car. When it was just me and her she made me listen to this. It sounds like… happy. Like music for a party two hundred years ago. Longer, probably.

The man is leaving me at home tomorrow all day. As much as I don’t want to know, I’m going to try to figure out what happened to me. So I have to go in the garage.

“The garage?” Zakk whispered in confusion. He turned the page, hoping for more, but there was nothing. He closed the journal, laid it down on the table how Lucas had left it, and went back up to bed.

Lucas lifted his head and asked blearily, “Zakk?”

A warm smile graced Zakk’s face at the sweet sound of his own name coming from Lucas’ mouth. “Yeah, I’m here, baby.” He laid down beside Lucas, and they wrapped their arms around each other. Zakk felt a bit of guilt again at the fact that he was treating Lucas like his lover again, but he felt the same guilt when he treated him like a friend, or worse, a child. It was hard not to, though, when it felt like every few hours, Lucas was a new person.

“We’re going to sleep now?”

Zakk’s smile turned into a slight grimace. Lucas had just woken up in a dark room and asked it was bedtime… Zakk just wanted his goddamned husband back. “Yep. Go back to sleep.”

“Okay.” Lucas dropped his head back onto his pillow. “I remembered something big,” he stated, as casually as if he were commenting on the weather.

“What?”

“I woke up, and I was crying because I realized that I forgot to brush my teeth,” he explained easily, and Zakk’s heart ached for the old Lucas even more, “and I felt kind of like… tired but not just sleepy. It felt awful. Like, tired in my soul.”

Zakk nodded as he listened.

“And I remembered I was sitting in here in the daylight and crying because I felt like that.”

Zakk was quiet for several seconds, waiting for more, but - just like the journal - nothing else came. “When was this?” he finally asked.

“Right before,” Lucas answered, slurring a little.

“Before what?”

There was another long pause.

“Lucas, before what?” Zakk asked, leaning up on his elbow to see Lucas’ face.

Lucas was sound asleep.

Zakk exhaled slowly in disappointment, and then he pressed his forehead against Lucas’ and began to pray.

---

Part 12

[crowkingwrites]

Ducky

Pairing: Ramsay Bolton x Reader // Words:1663 // Ao3 Link

Ramsay arrived home with the highest honors, more than three job offers, and his father’s approval. Military academy made him into a better man. Not in the sense where a man stopped his terrible behaviors, but better at hiding them. A particular professor almost kicked him out due to his bladed threat, but what could Ramsay do? The professor was a dick. He deserved it.

Bethany Ryswell, the closest thing Ramsay had to a mother, had planned a welcome home dinner party for her favorite boy. She welcomed him home with a warm hug and a kiss on his forehead. He may be in his early twenties, but he was still her little boy. 

Ramsay looked to his childhood friends and studied their faces. Some had grown to be tall, others fat and round. Some had noble coats and others had the same military coats Ramsay worn. None of his friends were married, in love, or even had a chance for a lady’s hand.

“I see Paris has been good to you,” Ben said. He ran a hand through his growing hair. “Roose has been talking about you all day like you battled the filthy rebels themselves.”

“Fucking peasants,” Ramsay shook his head. “If it were me, I would blast them all.”

“With cannons?” Alyn said. “You’d be considered mad.”

“I don’t think it would matter if I delivered results. The sooner the drunks stop filling the streets with their garbage, the sooner our lives will go back to normal. And what’s this I hear of your family immigrating to America? Is your family mad?” Ramsay responded. Damon handed him a glass of a sweet red wine. Ramsay’s lips touched the rim of the glass, tasting the sweet nectar.

Then he saw her. Someone who looked too familiar.

“My family is not like yours, Ramsay. You and your father come from a long line of assholes. Your father is an asshole. Your grandfather was an asshole. Your great-grandfather would have killed you by now if he had known you existed. My family is filled with a bunch of sugar-boned, fat pockets, drunk artists who can’t punch for shit,” Damon laughed out loud.

Ramsay’s eyes followed her across the ballroom. She was more beautiful than all of the girls in the room. Her makeup glowed. Her dress was pink and red, his family’s colors. Who was she? Why did Ramsay have the feeling he knew her?

“My father is begging us all to go. It’s gotten bad for the lower nobles, you know,” Damon finished his wine. “Rotten. This is all so—

“Shut up,” Ramsay rolled his eyes. “Who is that?” He pointed in her direction. Ben made an interesting sound. “Oh, you don’t remember, do you?” Ben smiled. “You’ve missed so much.” The boys started laughing. Ramsay rolled his eyes and took his glass with him. He knew this girl from somewhere. It itched the back of his brain. She was speaking with friends until they noticed Ramsay behind her.

Once she turned around, Ramsay knew exactly who it was.

“Y/N?” Ramsay studied her face over and over again. The last time he saw her, they were children. Ugly was a kind word for her. She often played with Ramsay and his friends despite them not wanting her around. Ramsay called her ‘Ducky’. Short for Ugly Duckling.

“Welcome home,” her voice was warm and inviting. Unlike her shrill voice as a child. “I heard you earned high honors, Mr. Bolton.” She played with the pink ribbons on the front of her dress. Ramsay’s eyes floated down to her chest. He didn’t remember her having such a voluptuous bosom or at least she never dressed this way.

“Y-yes I have. You know of my activities during our time apart. What of you? What have you been up to exactly?” Ramsay’s eyes flitted back and forth from her face to her other body parts.

“Finishing school,” Y/N answered. “After the mess I made with you and your friends, my Lord father wanted me to be a proper lady.”

“Proper?” Ramsay swallowed. How was she this pretty to look at? Her curls looked soft to the touch. He inhaled the air around her. He caught heavy hints of perfume. Her makeup brightened her eyes. Her nails looked perfect.

“Oh yes, you couldn’t have expected me to stay a tomboy with you forever, could you?”

“No, I suppose not.”

“Are you alright?” Y/N asked. Her smile hid something sinister underneath. Was she aware of the power she had?

“What?” Ramsay reacted.

“As I remember, you always had something awful to say to me.”

“You didn’t look like this when we were younger.”

Y/N laughed and it sounded like a song. Ramsay felt his cheeks warm up and he took a few steps back. Y/N reached out for his hand, but she caught his military sword instead. Both of their faces were inches from each other. Ramsay’s red cheeks warmed to her touch. She caressed his smooth face.

“Oh dear,” she giggled. “I suppose we have a lot of catching up to do, don’t we?” Y/N whisked Ramsay away from everyone else. They sped through the hallways and ducked under servants. Ramsay’s fingers itched to touch her more. His mind wandered back to when they were children.

How was she this attractive? It didn’t make sense. Covered in dirt, scratches on her arms and legs, her shrill voice still burned at the back of his mind. The girl he knew then and the young woman whose fingers brushed over his crotch could not be the same person.

“What happened to you?” he chuckled, trying to figure her out as if she was some puzzle.

“I like to imagine I grew up. Why? Did something happen to your eyes?” Y/N’s fingers pressed him against a wall. “Do you think you’re going blind?”

“No, I think I’m falling in love,” Ramsay laughed. He shook his head. Why would he say something like that? Men like him didn’t fall for anything. Y/N pushed them both into a bedroom. Her hands already exposed his chest.

“Is this your first time?”

Ramsay stood silent. He would certainly not admit that this was his first time. Not to her. His back became stiff like a board. Her lips brushed against his, and moved them along with hers but nothing warm was there. Her hand tucked into his pants and she grabbed him.

“Oh, you don’t like me,” she frowned.

“No! No. It’s-it’s not that,” Ramsay continued to kiss her face. His hands buried themselves in her curls. He pulled out pins and the pretty ribbons in her hair. He smelled the strong perfume and wanted to bury himself in her chest. He pushed her body into the bed while his mouth left trails of kisses that led to her corset. He pulled violently at the ribbons. It tightened and loosened her clothes and she laughed.

“This is your first time—

“No!” Ramsay yelled. “I’ve done this before!”

“Have you now?” she said as she helped loosen her corset. Ramsay’s mouth pleasured her nipples first. He sucked at them needlessly. Soon, Ramsay caught sight of his new military jacket, shirt, and shoes all over the ground. He smiled and felt her hands bring his face back to hers. He kissed her and she tasted like the peaches he always craved at the military academy.

His felt his member getting harder. He wanted more. He took one look down at her messy clothing and felt his throat tightening. Ramsay didn’t know where to put it.

She lifted her skirts and revealed the treasure between her legs. His blue eyes studied her parts and he remembered only one passing conversation about it.

“I kissed her down there,” Ramsay remembered Jon Snow told his brother. “I didn’t know why. I just wanted to. She really, really liked it.”

To cover up his ignorance, Ramsay’s tongue went to town on her parts. She moaned and cried out his name a few times. His tongue penetrated her folds and sucked at whatever skin his lips touched. She was drenched when he finally slipped himself inside. Her folds were soaking for him and he obliged her.

His cock slid in and out of her body and he never felt something so good before. His eyes rolled into the back of his head. Ramsay’s face buried into her neck once again. She felt so damn soft. His hands intertwined with hers as he increased his speed.

“Ramsay,” she breathed.

Oh, it was his turn now. He had power over her. He got high off the dominance he had in the military academy. He loved undermining his professors and captains. He enjoyed watching their faces fall whenever he would have a better strategy or a better idea. But this? His dick was inside of a childhood friend. This was a different kind of power.

Every time he would fuck her deeper, she would sweetly respond with her nectar-like voice. It made him grow bigger and tighter inside of her. Her walls closed in, grabbing onto his member. He brought his face to hers once more. He let her kiss him deeply. Before he could tell her that he was about to finish, Y/N pulled his ear close to her mouth.

“I want you inside of me. I want your seed,” she breathed. Shocked, Ramsay came inside of her. He filled her holes with a flood of his cum. His seed leaked out of her and Ramsay marveled at the sight of what he had done.

Y/N laid there with a sinister smile on her face. She was also proud of what they had done. Her form rose to meet Ramsay’s. Her chest was still bare. Her hair was in wonderful tangles. Her hands moved across Ramsay’s slowing chest.

“Am I wrong to assume that a new friendship has started here?”

“Doesn’t matter,” Ramsay said, kissing her forehead. “You’re still Ducky to me.”

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[heathendolan]

I Couldn’t Be More in Love [E.D]

Summary: Ethan’s not about cliches, he swears, but he has the feeling he might just die if he doesn’t tell you how he feels during your last senior prom slow dance.

Warnings: nothing but like I’m very sorry for the cheesy picture BUT LOOK HOW CUTE

Author’s Note: just a lil something I couldn’t get out of my head, it’s cheesy, it’s lame, it’s short, and it’s nothing special but my prom is next weekend and like c’mon how perfect would this be. just stopping by, hope you’re all doing fantastic!! love you all, and photo credits to popstyledolan (?? i’m not sure if this is instagram or twitter or tumblr, lmk if you guys know and i’ll add a link!!) ALSO like isn’t this song such a prom song I FEEL LIKE IT IS 

Word Count: 2.6K+ || masterlist

Ethan had a gut full of fruit punch (spiked--thank you Casey Fraiser) and a head full of fuzz; what's a guy gotta do to get you for a slow dance?

He's slumped on the third row of the high school gymnasium's wooden, creaky bleachers, both hands threaded in the messy, over-gelled locks on his head, his foot tapping a mile a minute. And he should really be out there next to Grayson, whooping and hollering to the ancient Lil Jon song echoing out of the low budget DJ's rusted speakers, but he just can't stop thinking about you, okay? And this isn't new, and that's what's getting old.

He just wants one slow dance. Or two. Or three, or four, or ninety. It's the only time he gets the excuse to hold you close and make a fool of himself and not have to apologize once. He always does everything in his power to deprive the mood of romanticism, though.

Because this isn't the first or even the second dance he's spent beating himself up over you. No, this has become a tradition over the years; Ethan says something like, 'Hey, let's go together to the dance, just as friends, cause I don't want to waste my time begging some chick that's probably out of my league when I can take my best friend and have a way better time' (romantic, he knows), you guys suit up in your best homecoming, snowball, or prom attire, and spend the night together.

As just friends. 

Ethan's made that super clear to you; Just Friends. Every single dance is Just Friends. And it's started to make less and less sense over the years, why he wouldn't go with Molly Kozial even though he'd been talking to her right up until promposals started getting popular again in March. 

"Molly's a lot of work," he had said through a mouthful of fries, his feet kicked up on his dash in the parking lot of the McDonald's you guys went to all the time. "What's the good in going out, spending a shit ton of money on candy or whatever, getting all nervous to ask her, and having the drama of it the next day in school when I can just go with you? Easy as pie."

Right, you had thought. Cause I'm definitely not worth the time, or the candy, or the drama. Ethan had made that very clear by the eighth time he'd taken you to a dance. 

It's not like you were going to bother yourself with the pain of his backhanded rejection; this was your senior prom. Just Friends is what you needed right before heading off to college--no need to invest yourself in some guy who'd inevitably break your heart by the end of summer. 

"Yeah alright," you'd said, slurping a thick gulp of milkshake. "But I think I want to wear white this year and-"

"Nooo, everybody's going to say we're getting married," Ethan whined reflexively, his head flopping against his car seat and a pout on his lips. 

"Deal with it," you shrugged. "That's what you get for your lack of, uh, chivalry?" 

Ethan shot a glare your way. "Chivalry?" he asked through a bite of his cheeseburger. "I hav' pl'nty 'f chivalry." 

"Right," you snorted, yanking the burger out of his hand and taking the biggest bite you could. 

So you'd announced it oh-so-inanimately to your friend group at lunch the following day, ignored their pointed smirks and knowing glances, and searched for a prom dress worthy of your bank account. And it was fun! God, it was fun, it was always fun going with Ethan and your friends, but...

Well, but you wanted to feel wanted. You wanted that whole experience, getting asked with roses, being slow danced with and held tight. Ethan unfailingly went overboard on slow dances every year; he shouted the lyrics to the songs off key, spun you around dramatically, made fun of all the surrounding couples--just sucked any bit of romance out of it. Cause you guys were Just Friends. 

And that was fine, but it wasn't perfect.

You looked around and saw him stuck up in the bleachers, his hair disheveled and his face pale where it hung. He looked awful--he looked sick. You stopped grinding on your best friend Courtney for a split second to examine him more properly. 

Ethan did feel sick. He thought he was going to throw up thinking about what he was about to do. 

Should he? Should he really expose himself like this, at a school dance of all places? Didn't you deserve better than that? You deserved a fun, drama-free night full of shitty 2000's music and even shittier spiked punch--the staples of a good prom. You deserved a bed of roses and chocolate truffles in those heart packages and a million other cliches. You deserved more than Ethan. 

But it's May now, Ethan realizes. Realizes he's got exactly 24 days until graduation, and then only three months until college begins and you two split about half an hour apart. It's May and how much longer does he really have anyway? What if you died tomorrow? Ethan's heart actually sinks at the mere thought.

He looks up to see you frowning at him half a gym away, your hair dolled up all pretty, your face caked with all the make you don't need but love so much. You look spectacular in your dress, obviously. Ethan knows there's no way in fucking hell he can't do this tonight, cliches be damned.

And now, now Ethan's made a promise to himself--he's gonna tell you how he feels--and it feels like torture. He has the heaviest, most leaden bit of dread sunken in his stomach. And yet, he's gotta do this. He's just gotta. 

You've started trekking towards him--wobbling like a newborn colt in those heels you forced yourself to wear--when the DJ says with the stalest of voices, "Alright everybody, we're going to slow things down a bit..."

It's a song Ethan would never know off the top of his head if he hadn't heard you singing it in the shower one time when he'd come over. He can still hear your voice--less than angelic, he will admit--wailing the lyrics of I Couldn't Be More In Love by the 1975. Rasp and cracks aside, the memory still makes his knees weak, even weaker than they are now, rising despite the butterflies in his belly begging him to sit back down. You halt where you are and gaze up at the rafters of the gym once you realize what song's playing, and Ethan can see the faint smile on your lips even in the lowlight and beams of disco glitter. He thinks he just might faint. 

By the time he gets to you, he can hear his own pulse, can feel it too in the expanse of his neck and planes of his chest. His hands are clammy—no, clammy hardly covers it. He might just sweat through his dress shirt; luckily, he discarded the vest and dinner coat awhile ago. You're still grinning up at the ceiling and Ethan wonders if he should just run while he still has the chance. 

But he doesn't, of course he doesn't, because he has to do this. So, he taps you on the shoulder gently, the most gentle he's probably ever been with you, and swallows the lump of fear in his throat. You look at him and grin, all teeth, and mumble, "I love this song."

"I know you do," Ethan blurts too quick, his words strangled. Slowly, he slides a hand down the length of your waist and wraps his palm there and takes your hand in the other. Then, the two of you realize that that just won't work, so he chuckles and pulls you in close, tight, fits you between his arms with his wrists dangling over each other behind your back. You slip your arms around his neck and it feels different this time, much different, and you wonder when Ethan grew up without you noticing. 

"How'd you know?" you ask after a beat, a quirk in your brow. 

Ethan pinches his eyes shut, cursing under his breath. "Uh..." he begins, swallowing thickly, "heard you sing it in the shower one time..."

He knows there are better ways to explain that, but he can't figure out any bit of the English language right now, not with you pressed against him naturally, like you could slow dance with him forever. He prays to god you can't feel his heartbeat against your cheek. 

"Oh my god, tell me you're kidding," you groan, heat licking at the back of your neck. You bang your head against the bone of his shoulder, humiliated beyond repair. "I have the worst voice and you know that."

Ethan shakes his head right away, his hold on you tightening just a little. This is so foreign, Ethan being... God, if you didn't know any better, you'd almost say Ethan was nervous. 

"That's okay, I like your voice," he squeaks. 

You stiffen against him and then realize he can't possibly be serious, so you giggle in his ear. "E, stop sucking up to me, we're already best friends." 

Ethan knows he has to do it now, now. He lets out a shaky breath and squeezes his eyes shut tight, counting back from ten. 

But what about these feelings I've got? I couldn't be more in love.

By the end of that line, Ethan decides he must spit it out. "I know, and I hate it." 

He hears your breath hitch in his ear, feels you tense and pull back from his chest, warmth disappearing from your body and your personality. Ethan knows he has to keep going when a look of pure heartbreak splits on your face. 

"I-I don't like being best friends. Well- no, I love being best friends, but I don't- I- I don't like being just best friends, okay? I don't like pretending and I've spent the past four years pretending," Ethan breathes, his whole body shaking. 

You've caught on by now, and your jaw's completely slack. It's a good thing Ethan's eyes are sealed shut--permanently, from what you can tell.

"Eth-"

"No, I gotta say this," Ethan whines, his head falling forward. He presses his temple to yours, so close and intimate in a way you've never seen him, never felt him. The two of you are still swaying, slow and steady, blending in with the crowd of lovesick teenagers. And it's weird because it feels so personal, you feel so alone in your own little world of Ethan. You love it. "I fucking love you. And I'm not saying it in that way that we end our facetimes with, I mean that I really fucking love you. I'm- I'm in love with you," he chokes out, his voice crackling. He pauses for a beat and shakes his head. "That's not even right. I don't even know if there're words out there that can describe how I feel about you. And I know I'm an ass about a thousand percent of the time, but that's because you make my legs feel like jelly and my head feel like static. And usually, I can just ignore it--well, not ignore it, I can never ignore you--but usually I can, uh, push it down," he says. 

Ethan pulls back and looks down at you, his eyes round and doe-ish. His tongue darts out to lick his lips and he shakes his head again. "But not tonight. Not when you're looking like this and acting like you always do. I- I think I nearly passed out when I picked you up from your house," he says, squeezing his eyes shut once more.

You're absolutely gobsmacked. Amazed. Stupefied. Speechless. 

"And I get it, I'm shit at romantics and even worse with words, but I mean it. I'm so into you. And this might be surprising since I'm pretty good at pretending like you're a little sister to me-" Ethan pauses to scrunch his face up distastefully. "-but that couldn't be farther from the truth. I, um, I couldn't be more in love," he finishes, wincing at his cliche and the way he's echoing the chorus's lyrics. 

You think you might just cry with relief, staring up at him. He's looking at you like you've just saved the world, or aligned the stars, or waxed poetry; his eyes are soft but full of awe, a few inches from yours. And his lips are parted like he wants to say more, but Ethan's right, he's never been that good with words, not until now. Your hearts thundering, pounding, racing in your chest, swollen with love for Ethan Dolan. And you thought he ought to know it.

You giggle with disbelief and shake your head. Your head falls forward on his collarbone and he takes the opportunity to kiss the crown of your head, and you wonder if Ethan feels this inevitability, that there has always been a spark of tension between you, that just friends can't care as much as you two do and remain just friends, that he's got nothing to worry about. So you pull back, inch your lips forward, and check his expression for permission, but Ethan's already halfway there. 

You lean in, and press your lips to him softly, graze your fingers against the peak of his cheekbone. He's kissing you back like he's got all the time in the world to love you under the glow of these disco lights, in the mass of these slow dancing bodies, in the middle of your high school gym. His tongue glides along the split of your lips, hesitant but warm and wet and stomach-flipping, and you crack open your mouth with a giggle, slipping your fingers into his over-gelled hair. Ethan slides his tongue along tentatively along yours. He must notice your shudder and feel you press into him more firmly, more sure of yourself, because he does it again, leaving you dazed and crazed and desperate. You cradle his jaw between your palms and kiss him like you mean it, lost in the feeling of love and the tune of a love song.

Subliminally, your brain registers the snickers and whispers sounding around you, but you're too intoxicated by the reality of your constant daydreams to really acknowledge them. However, Grayson has other plans as he claps a hand--hard--on Ethan's back as the song draws to a close, startling the two of you and peeling you away from one another. 

"About fucking time, bro," Grayson snorts, his eyebrows lifted skyward and his smirk far too smug.

Your cheeks are burning as you glare at Grayson and the way he's chuckling along with your crew of friends. Ethan decides there's far too much space between you and yanks you back to him, ignorant to your stiffness. "Suck my dick," he snaps back, resting his chin on the crown of your head. After a beat of swaying still, as the sound of a song less heavy rolls in, Ethan says, "I think your lipstick is like, all over my mouth."

You snort. "How much gel did you put in your hair?"

Ethan scoffs and shakes his head, his chin rubbing over your hair. "No idea. Too much."

"It's all over my hands," you giggle, squeezing them in the air and cringing at the way they stick.

"It's all Grayson's fault, the bitch doesn't know how to do hair apparently." 

You chuckle and shake your head, so familiar with this side of Ethan it comes as no surprise. What does shock you is the way he keeps his arms tight around your waist, the way he slips a finger under your chin and tilts your face to his, and plants another kiss--albeit tongueless--on you in front of half the student body. If Grayson gags violently and Courtney attracts the attention of everyone with her obnoxious awe's, that's okay with you. You couldn't be more in love. 

[beanfic]

Summertime Sadness - Ch. 10

Word count: 2369

Warnings: Underage drinking & smoking, language, angst, and some sexual scenes.

Author’s note: Don’t hate me, please :) Also for the song suggestions, I have like three songs that go well with three different sections but I don’t know how to make it like matchup because everyone has different reading paces but I’ll just put them and try to put when the “scenes” start, I guess? (sorry this is like a new thing for me lmao, I just want people to get the experience I get when I write them)

Song suggestions: *before the party*: All Time Low by Jon Bellion

*The party*: We Cant Stop by Miley Cyrus

*After truth or dare*: Ashes - part 2 by The Struts

“Do you have the alcohol?” you asked Johnny who was setting up the downstairs for the party. You were busy filling bowls up with different chips and snacks.

“I have the stuff to make jungle juice here, but my buddy Eric is bringing the beers,” he mumbled as he tried to hang up black lights.

“I can’t believe you actually bought black lights, that’s so extra.”

“I want this party to be sick!”

“It will be sick!” you mocked him, throwing a chip at him. His eyes glared down to where you were standing.

“What time will Josh be over?”

“I told you, he’s coming in like fifteen minutes.”

“But why? The party doesn’t start until nine tonight and it’s only seven.”

“Because I want to spend time with my boyfriend?” You shocked yourself by calling him that because it was the first time the word boyfriend had left your mouth.

“Speaking of him, I think he’s here early,” Johnny nodded to the knocking at the door. You headed over and opened it up to reveal a smiling Josh. He had a baseball cap on and his curly brown hair was poking out, and his tattoos contrasted with his white t-shirt.

“Hey, Y/L/N” he grabbed your waist and pulled you in for a long kiss.

“Hey to you too, Dun,” you smirked.

“Can you guys like not have sex in front of me?” Johnny joked, walking over to say hi to Josh.

“Johnny! We went to high school together, right?” Josh held his hand out for a handshake.

“The one and only,” your brother shook his hand way longer than he needed to.

“You want any help setting up?” Josh asked him.

“Nah, I’m good.”

“Okay, then we are going to go upstairs,” you grabbed Josh’s hand and pulled him upstairs.

“Be safe,” your brother teased from downstairs.

“Ignore him, he’ll get used to you eventually,” you whispered to Josh. You showed him your bedroom, which wasn’t as clean as it could have been.

“You must really like poetry?” Josh looked at your bookcase full of poetry books.

“Yeah, whenever I get bored I just pick one up.”

“That’s really cool!” Josh sat next to you on your bed.

“You excited for the party tonight?” you asked him.

“I’m more excited that I get to spend the night here!” he kissed your forehead. Tonight would be your first sleepover with Josh.

“Yeah, but I plan on getting shit faced tonight so don’t try to start any funny business, Dun!” you pointed your finger at him, only causing Josh to chuckle.

“I would never take advantage of you, plus I plan on getting shit faced as well since I don’t have to drive home!”

“Good!” you leaned in and gave Josh a long kiss. You could feel Josh’s hand move from your waist down to your thigh. “What do you think you’re doing?” you whispered mid-kiss.

“Just testing the waters,” he joked, placing his hand back on your lower back. “Come here,” he grabbed your body and pulled you so you were straddling him.

“You’re so naughty,” you giggled as he kissed your neck.

“And you love it,” he whispered back in between kisses.

“I need help!” Johnny came barging into your room, making you accidentally knee Josh as you threw yourself off of him.

“Jonny, what the fuck!” you screamed at him and then moving your attention to Josh who was kneeling on the ground, holding himself.

“I think you broke my penis,” he cried out.

“Shit, sorry. Come downstairs when you fix his dick,” Johnny quickly shut the door and you could hear him run back downstairs.

“I’m so sorry, Josh! I didn’t mean to!” you tried to help him sit up but he still stayed laying on the ground in the fetal position.

“I was so hard and your knee hit it in just the right angle holy shit it hurts,” he cried out.

“I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay,” he grunted, sitting up and wiping his eyes which were watering.

“Maybe we should just go down and see what Johnny needs help with,” you suggested helping Josh stand up.

“I don’t know if I can look your brother in his face though.”

“He could have walked in on something much worse, don’t worry.”

You both walked downstairs to find Johnny struggling to set up the Bluetooth speaker he had also gotten for the party.

“If we can’t get it to work, we can just use the CD player,” you suggested.

“But I want this so I can play my iPod!”

“Here, let me see if I can try to help,” Josh offered, heading over and starting to mess with the chords. After a few minutes, the music started to play out of the speakers.

“Hey thanks, man!” Johnny gave him a high five. You were glad that they were starting to get along, especially after what had happened.

The next couple of hours were spent helping Johnny make the finishing touches on the decorations. You were surprised by how good it looked. He had the black lights set up, and music blasting. He made jello shots and had two different pitchers with two different kinds of jungle juice.

One was fruit punch with vodka, and the other was orange juice and vodka. There was also a lot of beer and wine coolers that his friends brought over. Slowly people started to arrive, and the house quickly became filled with the skunky scent of weed and the sound of excited voices.

“Mariah’s here!” you heard Josh announce as he brought you your second drink of the night.

“Mar! I haven’t seen you in like forever!” you squeezed her with your arms in a huge hug.

“There’s no way you are already tipsy, Y/N.”

You shrugged, “Blame Josh, he brought me this drink!” you giggled.

Josh raised his hands in defense, “She said she wanted to get shit faced!”

“Oh my goodness, Y/N.” Mariah rolled her eyes as she headed to the kitchen to get a drink. You then noticed that your other friends were here too, Becca and Grace. They also invited some other friends.

“There are more people here than I was expecting,” Johnny came up to you and whispered.

“And?”

“I don’t want to get the cops called on us!”

“Stop worrying so much and enjoy yourself!” you giggled chugging the rest of your drink. You headed over to the rest of your friends to see what they were up to.

“Do you have any drinking games, Y/N?” this girl you recognized from your high school asked.

“Not really, sorry guys.”

“That’s okay, we can just make our own game!” this other girl spoke.

“We should play truth or dare!” Mariah suggested. Everyone thought it was a good idea, and you were already too drunk to say no.

“Okay, I’ll go first, Y/N, truth or dare?” Mariah asked you.

“Um, truth!” you said shyly.

“Okay, what is your favorite part about Josh?”

You looked up at Josh who was smiling down at you, “Definitely his eyes when he smiles or the way the drums when he drives. He’s just caring and amazing.”

“Aw thanks,” Josh wrapped his arm around your shoulder, placing a kiss on the top of your head.

“Gross, but cute,” Mariah joked. “Okay Y/N, your turn!”

“Okay, Josh, truth or dare?”

He wrinkled his nose as he thought hard about his decision, “Dare.”

“Okay, I dare you to go take three jello shots right now.”

“Easy!” He grabbed three of the jello shots, and you watched him plop each one in his mouth. Everyone turned and looked at him with their jaws dropped. It wouldn’t be long until those would hit him.

“Okay, Josh your turn!”

“Okay, Um, Mariah? Truth or dare!”

“Truth!”

“Okay, what’s your biggest secret?”

“Oh jeez, I don’t know? Maybe that I used to send nudes to the entire basketball team in high school?” she announced.

“Mariah,” you shoved your face into your hand, embarrassed by what she said.

“So now I see why Tyler was interested in you,” Josh slurred as the shots hit him fast.

“Okay, my turn!” Mariah exclaimed. You noticed that your cup was empty, so you ended up heading back to to the kitchen to refill it, and on the way, you got stopped by Jonny once again.

“How’s the party?” he asked, the smell of beer wafting off of his breath.

“It’s fine!”

“That’s good, can you make sure people don’t smoke in the living room?”

“Yep, sure thing,” you words slurred.

“You should maybe slow down on the drinks, lil sis,” he chuckled as he patted the top of your head. You rolled your eyes and stumbled back to the room where the game of truth or dare was happening.

“Hey what did I miss?” you asked practically skipping into the room with your freshly filled cup but what you saw made you halt. “What the fuck?” In front of you stood Josh’s mouth tongue dancing with another girl. His hands were dancing around her back and you couldn’t do anything but drop your cup all over you causing the juice to splash. The sound made Josh break from the kiss and look over to you in a panic, and he stumbled back almost falling over.

“Y/N, it’s just a dare!” Mariah announced but you shot her a dirty look.

“Y/N, wait.” Josh tried to grab your arm, but you pulled away from him, tears clouding your vision.

“What the fuck, Josh. Seriously, what the fuck?”

“Y/N it was a dare, please, it didn’t mean anything! Mariah dared the girl to make out with me.”

“I don’t give a fuck, Josh. You should have said no? Do I mean nothing to you?” you cried out, with your voice cracking at the end. The sound of you screaming made Johnny come over to see what was going on.

“What happened, Y/N?” he asked. Once he noticed you were crying he pulled you in for a hug and looked over to Josh with daggers. “What the hell did you do, Josh?”

“I didn’t-”

“He made out with some other chick,” you sobbed into your brother’s shirt. The alcohol and your emotions were not mixing well. Your head got shaky and the room started to spin again, signaling that you were about to be sick.

“Y/N, I said I’m sorry.”

“I want everyone to leave. I want Mariah to leave!” you screamed, running to the bathroom to throw up. Johnny hurried after you and held your hair up as you emptied the contents of your stomach.

“Y/N, are you okay? Do you want Josh to leave?”

You shook your head, “He’s drunk, I don’t want him driving.”

“Okay, I’ll go tell everyone else to leave.”

“No, don’t end your party. I just want Mariah and those girls to leave,” you tried to control your sobs but you couldn’t. Your brother held you until you felt ready to leave the bathroom. “I thought he loved me, how could he do this to me.”

“I’m so sorry, Y/N/N, I’ll go tell them to leave,” he whispered. He opened the bathroom door to see Josh standing outside.

“Y/N,” he slurred. You walked past him, ignoring him.

“Mariah, I need you and your friends to leave. Now.” Johnny ordered them once he found them all huddled in the kitchen. You stayed close behind your brother avoiding eye contact with anyone.

“What?” Mariah tried to argue but Johnny walked over to the door that was attached to the kitchen and held it open for them. You stood off to the side and watched your so-called friends, and the other girls from your high school walk out, shaking their heads with frustration.

“Thank you, Jonny,” you sniffled. You could feel that Josh was still standing behind you but all you wanted to do was go lay down in bed. The room was still spinning, and you wanted to let out of the tears you were hiding inside.

“Of course, little sis. Do you want me to take you upstairs?” he asked and you nodded. He wrapped his arm around you and helped carry your drunk self up to your bedroom.

“Let me know if you need anything, I’ll be downstairs with my friends,” he said before closing your bedroom door. You got changed into pajamas and laid in your bed, allowing the sobs to come back violently.

You didn’t understand why he would do something like that. Why he would tell you that he was falling in love with you, just to go and make out with another girl. Not even a simple kiss, but a full-on makeout session. And in your house?

The image of his lips crashing down on the girls, and his hands dancing around her hips replayed in your head but you tried to think about anything else. You closed your eyes and started to count to maybe trick yourself into falling asleep but it was not working.

The sound of your door opening slowly made you snap your eyes open, but you didn’t have to sit up to know that it was Josh. You could tell by the sounds of his footsteps and how he walked. He was trying to be quiet.

“Y/N,” he whispered. You ignored him and pulled the covers more over your head. You felt the weight of his body lay next to you on your bed, and his hand started to play with your hair.

“You kissed her,” you softly sobbed.

“I know, and I can’t even begin to tell you how sorry I am.”

“Is this what you meant when you didn’t want to hurt me?” you turned over to stare Josh in his eyes. He must have noticed how red your eyes were from crying because his thumb went straight to your cheek to wipe your tears away.

“I never wanted to hurt you, Y/N. Please forgive me.”

“I can’t, at least, not right now,” you whispered. You turned back over and closed your eyes once again to try to fall asleep.

Tag list:  @takenvysleep @ohprettyweeper @oncemorewithfeelingg @gaiatheroyalrabbit @svintsandghosts @addictwithaheavydirtycheetah @patdsinner33 @breadbinishigh @demonsdontcontrolus

[imagine--buddies]

A Birthday In Color-- Daveed Diggs

Request!: N/a I just got an idea

Prompt: Soulmate AU! The one where you can only see black and white until you touch your soulmate

Paring: Daveed Diggs X Reader

TW: Cursing? Maybe?, Clipping. songs so yeah: cursing, drinking

WC: 1355

A/N- i came up with this a few months ago, but I never had time to write it. Well, after months of struggling to balance all of our requests I FINALLY GOT THIS DONE

Masterlist

“Happy Birthday to you! You live in a zoo! You look like a monkey…. Aaaaaaaand you smell like one too!” Jaz sung as you closed the door to your apartment and dropped the shopping bags in the hall. You rolled your eyes, “Really, Jazzy?” “Hey, lighten up! It’s your birthday, and also I have a present for ya!” She raised and lowered her eyebrows. You gave her a smile. The two of you currently sat in your living room, it was around five o’clock, and Jazz had joined you throughout the day for your birthday. After a day of massages and shopping you were surprisingly tired.

“Okay, I’ll bite, what is it?” You gave up. You hated guessing.

“You never did like guessing.” Jasmine smiled deviously, and pulled out two thin slips of paper from her back pocket. She handed them to you, and you took them with haste. They were black and white. Just like else things else you have ever seen. You slowly looked up, a shocked look on your face, “You did not…” She nodded furiously, and a wider smile spread on her face. You attacked her in a hug. She stumbled back and embraced you as tight as you did her. “I can’t believe you got me Clipping. tickets!” You pulled away. “I thought they were sold out!” “Well, I have my ways.” She popped her collar. “By ways, you mean, you begged Daveed to get you his guest tickets?” “No… I begged Ant…. who then begged Daveed, but hey! I got them!” She shrugged and you chuckled. “Still, thank you so much.” You looked at the tickets with a wide smile, you went to hand them back to her. “Describe the colors?” Jasmine smiled. Ever since she met her soulmate, Anthony, at her old job in Hamilton, she had been blessed with the ability to see the colors of the world; while you were still stuck in black & white. You’ve met Ant, but, unfortunately, haven’t been able to meet the rest of the cast. Especially the one you wanted to meet the most, Daveed. You’ve been following his band since the beginning, and when Jasmine told you he was in the same musical you couldn’t believe your chances. “Well, there’s not really anything to describe, you could know what color it is without me.” Jazz shrugged. “Black and white.” You stated, taking back the tickets, she nodded. “From what I’ve heard from Diggs, Jon and Will haven’t met their soulmates, and I don’t think Daveed has either.” “That explains the lack of color.” You nodded understandingly. “Yep. Now, the concert is in five hours, we should get ready. I have one more surprise for you.” ———————————————- “Happy Birthday!” The women of the cast of Hamilton, plus a few of your own friends, screamed, and engulfed you in hugs. “Jazz! This is my birthday party not my bachelorette party!” “They’re both a party! Just enjoy! Drinks are taken care of, and the concert is here, so we don’t have to worry about leaving, and making it somewhere else.” Jasmine explained, and flagged down the bar tender. “Get her a cherry vodka.” The bartender nodded then went to work. “Thanks Jazzy.” You gave her one last hug. “No need! Enjoy!” Jasmine put a black sash on you that said birthday girl on it, then went to greet Reneé and Phillipa. “So… Daveed is going to be here…” “Ariana!” You exclaimed and the two of you hugged. “Hey! Happy birthday!” Ariana exclaimed, pulling away to look at you. “Thank you.” “Back to Daveed. Do you think you’ll actually talk to him?” She asked. “Highly doubt it.” You said and took a sip of the drink Jazzy ordered for you earlier. “Why?” Context: Ariana shipped you and Daveed saying you were perfect for each other. Pretty soon the rest of the cast had also began shipping you too. “Two years of being mutuals through multiple friends and never even talking once or being in the same room for more than 10 minutes.” You deadpanned. “Good point.” Ariana chuckled. “But hey! It’s your birthday! Drink and enjoy!” You laughed as she downed her drink and ordered another. Music started up and she, along with a few others, pulled you to the dance floor. ————————————————- “Everyone! Give it up! For Clipping.!” You were pulled out of your drunken blur when you heard the club manager say Clipping.’s name. “Wait! They’re going on?! Why didn’t anyone tell me?!” You stumbled over your words. “Calm down, (Y/n).” Anthony chuckled. The men of Hamilton had arrived about an hour ago. “I can’t calm down, this is my favorite band!” You squealed downing your drink, grabbing Jazzy and Ariana’s hands, and rushing to the stage. Daveed along with William and Jonathan entered the stage. “There’s your boyfriend.” Ariana whispered in her ear and you pushed her away playfully. “Alright. How’s everybody doin’ tonight?” The crowd cheered. Daveed smiled, “We’re gonna get started, but first I wanna give a shout out to my Hamilfam!” The men and women around you cheered along with a few others who stayed at the booth/bar. Daveed got them to calm down after a bit, and Will gave Daveed a thumbs up, signaling they were ready. Daveed nodded, “Okay. We’re gonna start, enjoy the show!” And you did. You rapped along to all of the songs, skipping over the parts that you couldn’t rap because he just raps too fast. You danced along to the beat with Jasmine and Ariana, and you could truthfully say it was the best time of your life. The song ended and Daveed exited the crowd to go back on stage and get a drink of water. Will stepped from behind the booth and took the mic from Daveed. “Alright,  last song.” Will said and the crowd awed. He raised his hands to tell the crowd to quiet down. “We know. We know, but come on. I know you all know it, rap along if you can.” He handed the mic back to Daveed, and got back behind the booth. Him and Jon bumped fist and they started the music. Work Work started playing and a smile spread on your lips. “Holler out your city if you ride for it Let em know why you die for it Same reason all these riders get high so it’s All medicinal now what you wanna buy, homie?” You rapped along and danced against Jazz and Ariana. Soon the chorus came up. Daveed was standing at the right edge of the stage farthest from you. “Get that work make that work work.” Daveed put out his hand and started to run across the stage. You exited the little dance circle and went to the front of the stage. “Go!” The crowd cheered as he ran across the stage, high fiving everyone. Unfortunately his hand didn’t touch yours the first time around. “Get that work, make that work work-” “Go!” The crowd yelled and Daveed took it as his que to run across the stage smiling so wide that his eyes were practically closed. This time, your hand made it into the high five line. “Get that work make that work-” Daveed got back into his rap mode and leveled his smile down, opening his eyes fully. The beat came and went, but Daveed didn’t continue like he was supposed to.   You looked up to see what was happening, and apparently so did everyone else.  The music stopped and Will and Jon looked very worried. The only thing different to you was that you could see color. The strobe lights kept going, you looked around catching glimpses of the clothes around you. A bunch of them were wearing mismatched colors and others were wearing Clipping. merchandise. “WHAT THE FUCK?!” You exclaimed, and all eyes turned to you. Daveed cleared his throat, and spoke into the mic, “I’m sorry about that, guys. I- I think I just found my soulmate.” He looked from your ‘Happy Birthday’ sash back to your eyes. “So um.. Happy birthday?” You smiled, and nodded, saying thank you. A Happy Birthday indeed.

Masterlist

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@a-blog-of-hamilton-and-writing

[serjaecerysstorm]

Jon

   With a deep sigh he slicks back an unruly strand of hair, trying to ensure he looks as close to perfect as possible. That's the least she deserves, her shining knight, he thinks, frowning as he looks at himself in the mirror and worries over his appearance yet again. Not her brothers scruffy friend, hair almost as long as hers, with the beginnings of a beard starting to show. Gods, I should have shaved, I should have at least cut my hair. He begins to pace in the small bathroom that he and Robb used to share, back when he lived with the Starks. He’d been home for weeks now, ever since the accident, having decided to take a semester off in order to help Robb and the others while Mrs. Stark stayed with her husband at the hospital between surgeries. Horrible as everything was, the time off couldn’t have come at a better time, what with the his recent troubles off at school and his breakup with Ygritte.

   Enough moping, tonight isn’t about you, it's about Sansa!

   Tucking another loose strand behind his ear, he opens the door and steps out into the familiar bedroom. Quickly throwing on the jacket to his suit, he grabs the keys to his car and makes his way down the hall and upstairs. Walking through the halls of the Stark estate reminds him of the good old days, when he’d first moved in with the Starks, of how Eddard and Catelyn had shown him the love and care no adults in his life had ever shown him before. He remembered the day he first walked through the door, with his single bag of clothes and possessions, all he owned by his side, walking just behind Ned with Robb hot on his heels. The two had met at school, and had quickly become inseparable. Eventually, Mr. Stark had offered to foster him upon learning of his previous experiences in the system, and suddenly he had a family. Robb was already his brother in all but name, but at the time he would never have imagined what the rest of the Stark family would come to mean to him. Eddard Stark was a kind and fair man, seemingly distant at first, but warm and supportive once one got to know him better. Mrs. Stark was hesitant at first, but after seeing how well he related to arya and helped to manage her wild streak, she too warmed up to him.

   Arya, if Robb was the brother he’d always dreamed of having, then Arya was the little sister he never knew he’d wanted. She’d taken to him immediately, following him and Robb around wherever they went, and Jon knew there was no one in the world, not even Robb, who understood him half as well as his wild little she-wolf of a sister. Bran and little Rickon were family as well, but due largely to their differences in age, he was not quite as close with them as their older brother and sister, yet still Jon counted them among those he loved the most. And then there was Sansa. Beautiful, brilliant, perfect Sansa. She’d been off at boarding school when he was growing up, often content to spend time with her friends or mooning over boys and fashion growing up. Add to that the way she had always treated Arya growing up, even going so far as to stand by as her friends bullied her little sister at school, and Jon had never had a very high opinion of her. In fact, he’d never had much of an opinion of her at all, having never paid her much mind until recently. Out of all the Starks, she was the only one he had  felt the most distant to. The two had never interacted much, with her off at school all year, and he and Robb away at camp most summers growing up. It had come as a surprise to Jon upon arriving home, when instead of the sweet, if somewhat selfish girl he remembered, he found the strong, supportive young woman she’d grown into. He could still remember the day he returned home, the biting cold, his bag stuffed to the brim with everything he could carry, standing at the foot of the drive leading up to the Stark estate.

   Not now, this is supposed to be a happy night, the worst thing you can do is get in your own head and ruin this as well. She deserves someone who can make her happy, distract her from all this, not remind her of how awful everything had been.

   Yet try as he might, his mind wandered back to the night everything had changed. It had all been so sudden, he’d been sitting at the bar all afternoon with his friends. Grenn had been trying yet again to prove that he could outdrink the other three combined, Pyp rattling away at the ‘hilarious’ events of the past weekend, while Sam sat by, content to listen along and interject every so often with a witty remark or correction. The four had gone out to ‘Celebrate Jon's freedom’, as Pyp had put it, yet he knew they had all liked Ygritte, so the attempt fell fairly flat. It had almost been a relief when his phone started buzzing, his mind immediately turning to his ex. How stupid I was to be upset about her. When he’d excused himself from the table to step away for the call, he’d even been thinking of the perfect line to tell Ygritte to go screw herself. But the second he read the caller ID that he began to get curious, “Arya? Why the hell is she calling this late?” He could still remember the way his stomach sank when he picked up that call and heard her sobbing.

   “Jon, its - somethings happened - he was driving and - Jon it's horrible!” Arya cried over the phone, barely making it three words without bursting into sobs.

   “Arya, calm down, tell me what's happened?” he asked, still not quite grasping how serious this must have been. Arya had always been strong, ever since she was a little girl, sneaking into the library of the estate, hiding away from everyone and everything in response to yet another of Sansa’s cruel remarks. She hated letting anyone see her cry, seeing just how much she cared. Even with Jon, the one person she opened up to, he could count on two hands the number of times she’d let herself cry in front of him. Yet here she was, sobbing over the phone, barely able to get a single sentence out. “Is this about that boy from your school, what was his name, Garlan? Glenndon? Grendel?” He asked, trying to make her laugh with the absurd attempt at names.

   “No Jon, its - its Father! He was, he was driving home from work and, and there was an accident, the doctors say - they say - he might not make it Jon!”

   Everything after that is a blur, him trying to calm Arya down, sprinting across the bar to grab his jacket, racing across campus to his place, packing as much as he could into a bag and calling a cab. He hadn’t even told Sam and the others where he was going, he just jumped in the car and sped to the airport. A the next night he found himself standing on the drive of the only place he’d ever called home, steeling himself for the worst. By then Eddard’s condition had stabilized a bit, and he’d been brought in for surgery, so the majority of the Starks were told to head home and return in the morning, while Catelyn had remained by her husband’s side. As he walked up the drive, boots tracing a path through the light layer of snow, Jon remembered the feeling as he pushed open the front door, stepping into the foyer of the estate, leaving his jacket on the rail as he walked into the enormous room.

   Gods, but how she’d changed, I could hardly believe it was her when I first found her that night.

   He’d been headed to the kitchen, thinking to grab a cup of coffee before heading to Arya’s room to check up on her. Before he could even reach the kitchen, he heard the sounds of someone talking from the estate’s library, and gently pushed the heavy oak door open to see who was awake that late. To his surprise, it was Arya and Sansa, the younger sister sobbing into the shoulder of her older sister. He recognized the tune Sansa was whispering immediately, as the same tune their mother had sung to each of the children, himself included, growing up.

   “Gentle Mother, strength of women”, he voice was as sweet and clear and comforting as her mother's had been growing up, and in that moment Jon couldn’t help but to stand there and listen, the familiar tune helping to calm his racing thoughts. “Help our daughters through this fray”, the two were sitting on the couch to the side of the room, the pale moonlight from the window behind them the only thing serving to illuminate the otherwise dark room. She was holding Arya against her, her back to him, her auburn hair cascading down her back, hints of pale ivory shoulder peeking through from behind the wisps of hair. “Soothe the wrath and tame the fury”, he stood, frozen in the door, unsure if he should leave them to this intensely private moment, or make himself known, or simply wait and listen. “Teach us all, a kinder way”.  It wasn’t until the song ended that Arya stopped sobbing, looking up to see Jon in the door, her eyes going wide.

   “Jon!” She cried, springing from Sansa’s arms and running to him. Jon knelt, as he’d done so many times before, and caught his sister in a fierce embrace. “You’re here, I knew you’d come!”

   “Hush now little wolf, of course I came, we’re family, there's nothing that could keep me from being here” He sighed as she leaned into him, trying and failing not to yawn into his chest as she clung to him. “Ok, it’s alright Arya, it’s almost four, and we’re supposed to be back at the hospital to see your father first thing, so let's try and get some sleep before then, there will be plenty of time to talk in the morning.” he said, chuckling despite himself at the cry of indignation his sister made, even as she stifled another yawn.

   “I’m not a kid anymore Jon, you can’t just send me to bed because it’s late, I’m in the eleventh grade now!” she mumbled, even as he swept her into her arms and began heading for the door. “But maybe, I might be a bit tired, so I guess it’ll be ok” she whispered, “As long as you promise I can drive out with you tomorrow.”

   “Of course, we’ll head out first thing, maybe even beat Robb and the others to the hospital” he promised, already dreading the trip into the city the next morning. Wordlessly, Sansa stood and followed the two of them out of the library and down the hall. By the time they reached the stairs into Arya’s basement room, she was fast asleep in his arms, and Sansa stepped forward and to open the door for them.

   Gone was the selfish girl I’d known growing up, the woman I found taking care of her family is someone entirely different, someone stronger than the girl I’d known.

   “Thank you Jon” she whispered, careful not to wake her sleeping sister. The two of them walked into the dim room, Jon laying his sister in her bed, while Sansa pulled the comforter over her, making sure to tuck her in so that even if she rolled she would remain covered. “I’ve been trying to get her to sleep all day, she hasn’t taken a moment to stop since this all happened.” Sansa explained as the two of them walked up the stairs and back into the hall.

  “And what about you?” he asked as they reached the end of the hall and the foyer. “When was the last time you got some sleep? I know this is hard on all of us, but they’re going to need you, Arya, Bran and Rickon, even Robb, although I doubt he’ll admit it.” He said, surprising himself with how much he meant what he said.

   “Thank you Jon, but it’ll be ok, especially now that you’re back. Arya’s been quiet, tonight was the first time I’ve seen her react in any notable may, and Robb’s hardly said anything to any of us since he found out, he’s been so focused on making sure everything is taken care with fathers work and his clients, trying to show him that he can take care of everything while he’s recovering, that is, if he - if he even -” at that Sansa’s voice broke, and for a moment she looked ready to cry herself. As quickly as it had happened, she collected herself and reassumed her previous calm demeanor. “If he even wakes up. It’s good you're here, Jon, they’ll need you too, in a way they’ll never need me.” she finished as she began to walk up the stairs.

   “Sansa, I - I know this hasn’t been easy for you either, and I know we’ve never been particularly close before, but I meant what I said to Arya earlier. It’s like fath-, like your father would say whenever you and Arya would fight as kids, ‘When the snows fall and the white winds blow, the lone wolf dies but the pack survives’. It might seem hopeless now, but we’ll get through this, together as a family. If you ever need to talk, to take a moment for yourself, I’m here for you.” he called after her, surprising himself of how open he was being with her.

   She seemed startled at this, almost as he was to hear himself say it, “Thank you Jon, perhaps I’ll take you up on that at some point. Oh and for what it’s worth, I’m glad you're here too.” She said, turning to face him as she did. If he closed his eyes, he could still picture her as she looked, standing at the top of the stairs, hair a wild mess, biting her lip ever so slightly as she smiled down at him, stunningly beautiful, yet haunting at the same time.

   Well, here we go. She’s Robb’s sister, she’s practically your sister you fool! This is just to make her happy. She used to love going to the new year’s ball as a kid, and you know she’d been planning on going with her shit of an ex-boyfriend. That’s all this is, a brother taking his sister to a dance to distract her from everything that’s been happening, all this tragedy. This has nothing to do with how you feel when she’s around, how she makes everything feel so much easier when she’s around. That’s why you’re doing this, there is no other possible reason. 

   With a deep breath, he knocked on her bedroom door. Despite thinking himself ready, the second she opened the door, his breath caught in his chest as he took a sharp breath inwards.

“God Sansa, you look, you look beautiful!”