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#like thinking abt them mourning her
zayphora · 11 months
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i finished reading blame!. images and words and what they mean
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angelsdean · 2 years
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thoughts based on this anon to @queermania
no but really they should’ve had jack have to kill Michael!dean and not be able to bc despite telling Cas he’d kill dean if it meant saving the world from Michael when it comes down to it he. Can’t :( that’s one of his dads ! And he knows dean wouldn’t fault him for doing it. He’s right when he said it’s what dean would want. Oh self-sacrificing dean. But jack can’t do it, so instead he uses up all his power and burns his soul to expel michael out of dean and kill him. And hey, sacrificing souls for family…that’s something dean understands too. He doesn’t Like it but he gets it. Then later, the parallel to this comes around when dean’s gotta kill soulless!jack but he can’t !!! Jack tells him it’s ok, he understands. Just like dean understood why he needed to be killed as Michael!dean. But that’s his kid!! So he tosses the gun away bc he doesn’t care if jack doesn’t have a soul, he’s still worth saving, still worth loving. He’s still family. And, god, they really do love in similar ways. Anyways dean gets down on the ground in front of kneeling jack and pulls him close, hugs him to his chest and says, “it’s ok, I got you, kid.” And THEN, chuck burns out Jack’s eyes while dean’s holding him, powerless to do anything. And dean shuts his eyes instinctively at the burst of light and he hears Cas’s anguished scream shake the world and he doesn’t want to open his eyes, thinks if he keeps them closed it won’t be real. Anyways, it all could’ve been done SO much better and for maximum grief and despair. Esp during the divorce arc to have them BOTH deeply mourning jack instead of having all of dean’s grief be focused on Mary which, tbh, didn’t really fit.
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bunnihearted · 1 year
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nomaishuttle · 1 year
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anything exciting going on today guys. ive been playing sdv all day due to the devil resides within me
#got to winter so im doing ginger island stuff#its. sigh. yk...#my mod t fix it is like. the dialogue + portrait changes are in place but not. the spritez? which annoys ne ...#also my one mod t make ermm. winter star less christmassy seems t be messing up.. bc the sprite to replace the christmas trees is like#its there but. Behind the christmas tree? like it loaded both at once.#i havent xhabged the settjngs for that Or my map mod so idk..bc it wa working fine in year 1... mgght just hsve t dig in deeper and check..#i also umm disabled my sprites + portraits mod for the ginger island charactsrs so HOPEFULLY that helps. i havent reloaded le game yrt so#mabye tmrw itll be all fixed... grins#BUT. not 2 brag i got both of the winter fish i was looking for in 1 day... first day of winter zlets go gamers. and thats all j rly hsd#for winter. the rest is umm. my last 2 spring thangs (apricot and legend) and then the aby season stuff which i think atp is. liteeally#just the ginger island stuff... so i should have that done by spring !! very exciting 4 me..#anorher issue abt the umm diverse ginger island mod is. i HAVE the addon t make the portraits look nicer but. Ohh i dont mean to be hateful#rheyre still so insanely ugly 2 me the portrsits 😭😭 they just are not up to par#also ngl i think a lot of the changes are like. idk. some of them feel entirely just. lame.#like idk how 2 say this withiut sounding like a bigot whos like LESS GAY PPL but like. the problem with ginger island wasnt. that birdie#was mourning her husband instead of her wife. yk#i also think its just kinda WEIRD t like. age leo up sm. and to make him have a gay thing with sam like idk. i think it was possible t just#have an islander kid. and not be weird abt it.. but idk..#IDK. thats like. hateful. and i do rly appreciate the likee. yk. i appreciate rhe goal of the mod and i find it t be. better than canon#Not that thats hard lord. im just like idk..#i just dk. im rly conflicted on it#i wish there were more like. options t choose from irt to ginger island rewrites yk.#i saw like one other whej i was sesrching but iirc it was like#I LOVE GINGER ISLAND AND HOW IT WAS HANDLED! i just wanted to add MORE <3 and its like. ok man
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nomairuins · 25 days
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my tags on that went on for so long i had to go back and edit them to fit tag limit and i still had to delete a bunch of them. Its the autism it literally is
#funerary practices and the afterlife and body disposal methods and just. grief and mourning in general r like. My bigggg autism thing i dont#talk abt it a lot bc 1 i just Dont shut up once i get going 2 a lot of ppl dont want to hear abt stuff like that which is fine. kicked pupp#expression. i just find it very very interesting to see how different ppl grieve and whats considered like. Right and wrong when it comes t#care of the body yk. bc like. most/every culture has their practices and anything outside of that feels wrong to them bc its like. yk its s#pivotal idr the exact anecdote/story but caitlin doughty mentioned it in one of her books where like. there were 2 groups and one cremated#their dead and the other practiced mortuary cannibalism and both viewed the other as barbaric and it rly shaped how i view it like. yk. its#rly something so personal where even when the way someone grieves makes you uncomfortable its like. you cant force someone to grieve in a#way thats palatable to you. yk. for a rly long time washing the body and being with the body after death was a rly important part of grief#in like. usamerican culture its only more recently that it became wayyy less common w the rise of funeral homes and stuff. and obv for many#ppl that wouldnt be comforting but i think it could be for a lot of ppl..#my personal belief on it is everyone should be allowed to grieve and dispose of the dead As they want and that should be like. yk. theres#the nebulous term of Desecration which is legally rly difficult to define there r a lot of states where the law is 'if it would outrage#normal family values' which is just so fucking stupid obviously like. whos family. bc every single person has a different view on whats#appropriate yk... IDK. i think as long as its relatively safe for the living and as long as its not like. Against the wishes of the decease#like. if someone says they want a burial and then theyre cremated (not out of necessity like 4 financial stuff) im like. yk. obv theyre dea#but i think its important to honor their last wishes... yk. and that should go for like. If someone wants an open pyre cremation that shoul#be available... if someone wants aquamation etc. IDK. etc. like. another thing is with embalming while i wish it werent De Facto ppl r#railroaded into it i entirely disagree w ppl who say it should be wiped out entirely like. there r environmental ramifications 4 sure and i#love for that to be more like. talked abt... but embalming is rly important to a lot of ppl and idt its right to shit all over that. idt it#necessary for every death i personally dont see the point of embalming for like. a peaceful death with a quick funeral and theyre getting#cremated after. but ik like. for a lot of black families embalming is very important for like. a reclamation esp in violent or traumatic#deaths its very important to have like. a funeral with a viewing. and i think thats something that shouldnt be taken away from anyone ever.#even like. ik this is controversial but extreme embalming w/ posing and stuff as long as thats what the decease wanted like. i think its#awesome !! i Dont agree w taking the corpses of the poor or disenfranchised to prop up for art pieces Personally but like. there r ppl who#want to be displayed like that like. riding their motorcycle one last time or ummm. that posthumous concert that happened. i get how it can#seem morbid or wtvr but like. the families r happy with that its what those ppl wanted and it like. its a celebration of their life and#their interests and i think thats super important. BASICALLY.#ok tag limits coming so im cutting myself off for sure this time. but wtvr. i hope this makes sense to anybody else sorry i rambled. im ver#passionate abt it KJBADKJBDKJ
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swordmaid · 1 month
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i like thinking about shri’iia’s life pre receiving her oath/turning into a paladin where she was yet another swindler in menzoberranzan. sometimes I think about changing her background to urchin just because her childhood was particularly rough - since she was raised in poverty she had to literally build herself from the ground up and she didn’t care what she had to do, her only focus was getting herself out of the slums - but then the liar and cheater aspect of charlatans is such a core part of her character that i can not! before I used to have this hc that shri’iia had this particular network of people she used to work with - since she doesn’t bear any allegiance to any houses, she becomes the sort of middle man for people looking to ruin someone else since the trail won’t lead back to them - but I think she’s not capable of running such an intricate network lmfao like there’s a reason why she’s a very good attack dog and not the person pointing where to bite, but I think I like the idea of her being something similar where she will cheat and swindle people if she’s paid to do so, and I also like the idea of her hanging around the upper city and learning how the middle class/nobles talk and studying their mannerisms so she can blend in their ranks, pretend to be one of them. it’s to cheat and steal from them ofc but I also think it’s a wish fulfilment in her part bc that’s who she wanted to be you know, they’re the kind of drows lolth expects her children to be, and shri’iia is def manifesting that for herself. she believes she’s destined for better! bc lolth says that drows are above all! so she can’t be living in braeryn where the slaves and the non drows are….that’s not Right.
hence why, when she got that offer to join a noble house in exchange for her allegiance (autonomy) she didn’t think twice just accepted bc it’s exactly what she wanted.
#then cue the rest of it#I also like thinking about shri’iia in her time as the matriarch’s weapon where she would hunt down traitors of her matriarch’s house#or basically whoever her matriarch told her to hunt. she never asked questions or details she only did what she was told 👍#I wouldn’t put it past her to have hunted down slaves / drow men trying to escape for a better life and I think she was particularly cruel#with them to please her Lady like. that’s so diabolical of her but we can see it#the thing with her is that she has done the most rancid diabolical things known to man and she didn’t care! she stomached it!#there’s no honor or morality when all that mattered to her was getting her matriarch’s praise#like she was really The Best type of Paladin for a drow and that’s like. the worst u can be lol#and when she gets abandoned in the surface the realisation of what she has done never Mattered#and the things that she DID do for lolth’s name. the crushing weight of it all#for me it’s hmm less regret - I don’t see her regretting her actions nor denying it bc she WAS that person u know I still think she retains#that conviction bc it is a very paladin trait to have. and to deny it isn’t in her nature#but I do think she mourns the devotion that was lost. and she also knows better to regret bc even if she was aware that everything was for#nothing (which is already implausible) she would still make the same choices anyway since she was following that oath. and her following it#is out of her own Will too like these choices - while heavily influenced by a cult’s doctrine - are still hers#like an important thing for me is that she fully owns up to her past and everything and it’s not some outside figure’s fault - like yes she#def was manipulated and heavily influenced - but it’s still her own#like it’s all abt autonomy for me … much to ponder about I think#oc: shri’iia.
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arolesbianism · 5 months
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Shakes the bars of my cage I need to draw soooo bad I need to draw I need to draw let me draw I have to draw I need to draw I must draw (<- has been too sick to be on electronics much and doesn't like doing traditional art)
#rat rambles#Im starting to feel better tho Im betting within a day or two Ill have made a full recovery#but I just have so many things I wanna draw all the sudden and its killing me#its because I've been thinking abt ocs again and that gives me a lot more options lol#in particular I've been thinking abt marci and toon more again recently#its just the two of them flirting in their mutual workplace environment with toon being dead serious and marci doing it ironically#the main thing is that marci was rly under the impression that toon like. hated her and was taunting her since they're friends with loonie#who long story short is marci's ex childhood best friend who she fell out with after the death of loonie's mom#the two are not on good terms in the slightest and marci knows very well that loonie would want her dead if she had been more honest#so as toon starts to like get more casual and like genuine with marci as the two spend more time together marci warms up somewhat but still#doesn't rly see toon as a friendly figure until they take her out to a museum and marci kind of snaps a bit and asks toon to stop beating#around the bush and is caught off guard when toon seems genuinely kind of hurt and meekly explains that they were just trying to help her#because she had seemed rly stressed and sad all the time and they thought that their lil dates had been helping her relax a bit#that confrontation left marci initially feeling confused but after the initial shock she was mostly left with a sense of dread and guilt#partially because she had just snapped at someone who she had grown to care abt for no reason and partially because she now felt that she#was hiding stuff from toon that would cause them to change their mind on her immediately if they knew#aka that she and loonie are divorced and that she thinks its mom sucked absolute ass (which she did)#oh and also that she used to have a crush on the guy that killed its mom who was also his mom which is also the reason she hates said mom#said mom treated him (aka midas) like shit and tried to get him killed several times#so when all hell broke loose marci at the end ended up mourning midas much more than his mom who everyone else was mourning#including loonie since it actually had a very positive relationship with its mom and a very distant relationship from its siblings#now marci never admitted all of this to anyone but she did act on those feelings to eventually lash out at loonie causing a huge fight#basically she yelled at it for being pushy and clingy and forcing her into a job she didnt want and expecting her to solve all its problems#the two dont necessarily hate eachother but they definitely heavily resent eachother#they still often long for eachothers companionship but not nearly enough for either to wanna make ammends#so toon quite liking both of them causes some internal conflict for the both of them#loonie is fully aware that toon has a big ol crush on marci but doesnt stop them from being friends with her even if it makes it sad#and marci rly wishes that toon wasnt friends with loonie but feels guilty for feeling that way#its a complicated situation and one that rly isn't helped by the fact that one of the three has the dead god queen mom#loonie could get away with a Lot and everyone knows it
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i love when you have a pair or group of characters in any situation and people look at them and go "ah this one is clearly The Normal One. unlike these other people" and then they proceed to prove them immediately and passionately wrong
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radioroxx · 2 months
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THE. ISAFRIN KIDS I MENTIONED. shared little ocs of my mutuals server <3 love u collection muah muah im not tagging everyone in this tho
other doodles plus some rambling below vvv
- aurore(she/they) and philémon (he/him). they have their own nicknames etc because Who Are Isa and Sif Without Nicknames but. éile is much much more partial to use his than aurore. for her its, every now and then. for him its most of the time (like how bonnie goes by bonnie and not boniface)
- i dont remember how why we started making fankids but i do remember very early on in the conversation discussing the idea of wish kids. think that one fankid meme with the baby descending from the sky. thats a wish kid
- there are. a lot a lot of silly goofy ideas weve come up with for them (such as: isa being Not very good at hair and embarrassing himself trying to help out), but i think my brain would explode trying to remember it all lol. and type it out. feel free to ask ques abt them tho :)
- one thing we did talk about a bunch is! how siffrins background would play into it. having kids + starting a family with isabeau,, maybe feeling guilty over the culture they arent able to share. to make up for it! they! do what they can!!
theres no way to know for sure for sure if siffrins cloak is a island thing. or a family tradition. or just Something his parents did. regardless they would want to do the same for their own children! isa already makes tons and tons of outfits for em (you could imagine lol), so of course he has no issue helping out sif in this new project. (they got to help put with the design of their own cloaks though! for preference)
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another thing siffrin wants to share with them is. easily. stars! the stars are something siffrin grew up knowing to be important (or well, he assumes so). so thats something they would want to share too :). maybe he cant remember their names, or constellations, or what any of it Means,, but they can still teach the science behind it! which is also very interesting!! the kinda stuff the kids would take to school the next day to impress other kids with lol
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(i also just wanted an excuse to draw the family together,, can u blame me….)
- we also discussed. hypothetically if loop is still around by this point. their own feelings in this situation. its been years since the time loops were broken- years for loop to come to terms with, and mourn, etc. even still theres that feeling of bitterness that lingers, knowing they couldve had this. this couldve been them-
but also its. its hard to be angsty and upset around little kids. ehe
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(we joked about loop becoming an awesome babysitter. the kids love them very much.)
ok thats all ur getting for now fjkd again feel free to ask questions weve been a little insane since yesterday
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myersesque · 11 months
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i genuinely have so many emotions abt npmd, especially about max jägerman
he's such a tragic character!!! like yes max is the villain but he also Didn't Have To Be. one of the biggest issues w hatchetfield in-universe is how willing people are to take horrible things at face value - nobody thinks max can change because bad shit happens all the time in hatchetfield, nobody cares why this ONE kid is acting out. nobody looks for him when he disappears because people go missing all the time in hatchetfield, what's one more kid gonna do. even once they've found his body they barely mention him; richie gets more love and mourning and he was actively bullied by half his classmates. they care more about losing the big game than they do max's death.
and yes ok the repeated mention of them being 18 is 1) a joke abt slasher movie teens conveniently being Just Old Enough to sexualise and 2) a joke abt grace thinking that perfectly normal barely-flirtatious activities (like max offering to carry her books) are too scandalous and explicit for 18 year olds. but also like. he's a kid. 18 is an adult but also a kid, yknow? and he. literally thanks them for making fun of him because it's the nicest thing anybody's ever done for him. he takes it as an olive branch for friendship rather than the mockery it was meant to be. he's just a kid with a shitty life who's taking it out on people because nobody cares about him. he himself sings about how he knows he's gonna peak in highschool, so why not do whatever he wants now, since he'll amount to nothing later? and once he dies, his own friends sing about how much better their lives are without him.
yes obviously he's a bully and a villain, i'm not disputing that, but there's something so painful about seeing that glimmer of hope for redemption right before his death - that maybe he was wrong about them, that maybe his dad was wrong about him, that maybe they could be friends and he could have people who care about him and be somebody other than a mean jock - and then it's instantly snatched away from him, and all that's left is humiliation and misdirected rage. it's so fuckin sad.
or maybe that's just me. i dunno.
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double--blind · 11 months
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(SPOILERS) Andrew and plausible deniability, OR: mfer doesn't wanna be held accountable for his actions
This has been churning in my head for a while (I am mentally ill 🥴), but a large part of the driving force behind Andy and his actions is his aversion to blame. He sorta shares this w/Ashley (she's got quite a few rants abt how things aren't her fault), but I believe Andrew takes it just a step further.
I've seen many say this before, but from the start of the game, you'll notice that even beyond normal moral quandaries, Andrew's first objection to any horrific action Ashley proposes is usually a variance of "what if we get caught?". He objects not bc her ideas are ethically repugnant, but bc they could be found out as having done them, and he knows rationally that others know they're bad. This goes as far back as childhood with the Nina incident. He fears punishment and the threat of prison more than he apparently worries about what his crimes might mean for him as a person or what they might mean for the people that might be affected by them (save him and Ashley). This doesn't mean he doesn't feel guilt or have nightmares abt them, but they're not his first priority. Trouble's a pain to deal with, and the dude's low-energy.
In fact, most of his guilt seems largely self-centered. Like, no exaggeration: if it isn't about either him or Ashley (which is, in a way, lowkey also about him), then he couldn't really care less. Do you recall him ever expressing worry or remorse on Nina's behalf? Mourning her? We think Ashley's the one w/empathy issues, but Andrew's in the same boat imo. Self-preservation and self-interest is all that's keeping him seemingly amiable enough for polite society, bc for the most part, he really couldn't be bothered.
In his dreams, the victims of their murders are just bodies: interchangeable, holding no more meaning beyond the fact that they're dead. Any corpse's limb will do to replace the one Ashley cooked—never mind that they may be from different people—bc they're all the same to him. Even Julia, sitting in her dorm room surrounded by evidence of Ashley's harassment, gets no sympathy from Andrew. For the most part, he elects to ignore it all, and regards Julia herself with a detached sorta nostalgia tinged in no small part with apathy.
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img txt: You'll never see her again. And the fact that it doesn't really bother you, bothers you.
(The only things of notable worth from her were the colored pencils on her desk, which he promptly takes from her to give to Leyley instead, and isn't that just some crazy symbolism right there?)
His fear of punishment goes hand-in-hand with his desperate pursuit of plausible deniability. Everything he does, he does under certain self-imposed conditions. If it's Ashley's idea and he argues back, it doesn't matter in the end if he goes along with it, bc it was Ashley's idea in the first place. He's just there to make sure she doesn't get them in trouble, bc she needs him, bc he's gotta take care of her. Even if it's not her idea at all (e.g., killing the closet warden, killing the lady in room 302), it's still her fault, bc he did it for her, bc everything he does, he does for her.
Ashley's a manipulative, evil lil possessive gremlin w/a soul as black as tar, and Andy's a doormat, but don't think for a second that part of him doesn't use that dynamic a little to keep from reflecting on what he is. He suffocates under it, but he also relies on it. If there's any sort of plausible deniability available, he'll take it and run with it.
The truth of the matter is that they're both deeply toxic, warped individuals. The difference is that Ashley's owned up to it and quite frankly doesn't care. Andrew hasn't. He's the "normal" one.
Now, for the funky incest part (what we're all here for babyyyyy)—
We've all seen the flavor text abt the bed-sharing by now, right?
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img txt: Oh yeah, you tooootally have nightmares as often as you claim.
We know for a fact that aside from some light teasing, maybe, Ashley would have no problem whatsoever with sharing a bed w/Andrew. Heck, she'll coax him into bed (demo) or climb onto the couch with him (ep 2) w/o any prompting from him whatsoever, just bc she feels like it. Andrew, apparently, can't do the same. He doesn't allow himself this intimacy of his own choosing, so he has to lie and pretend to get it if he wants it. He's greedy for her, too, but he can't let himself show it.
If something is sufficiently too intimate in his eyes, beyond anything he can excuse away for some reason or another, then he'll stop himself from doing it. Just like how he wouldn't let himself succumb to the urge of pulling Ashley into his arms to make her smile, but is willing to give her a hug when she asks for it in front of their parents.
He insists on the extra expense of two beds, and then cites his nightmares and panic attacks as the driving force behind crawling into bed w/her, bc then it isn't really his fault now, is it? He tried to stay away, after all. He did! He just didn't have a choice!
Lol
Andrew can't admit to wanting this—buries those feelings and thoughts as deep as he can so they fester and bleed, the repressed idiot—so he gives Ashley all the power to decide how close they get. It's in Ashley's hands. He's free of that hassle.
Which is why the post-sex vision, and Ashley's reaction to it, is so dangerous. @csg-iii made a good point about it in my last post:
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img txt: I think the biggest point about "11" is that Andrew asks/begs Ashley for reassurance that it will never happen ("never say never"). It's a subtle admission that if she really wants it to happen, he knows he won't be able to resist his own urges. His only ""hope"" of avoiding going there is if Ashley doesn't want it.
Andrew, in absolving himself of this choice and putting it in Ashley's hands, shoots himself in the foot, bc what if Ashley goes the whole mile? Then the only real thing keeping his desires unrealized was the fact that they had never been voiced as an option before.
He doesn't want to think of himself as someone who'd bone his own sister. Forget being a cannibal, demon summoner, or a murderer; those titles were foisted upon him. This is too close to something real that he carries inside him; this isn't anything Ashley's buried in him, but rather something of his own invention. Something he'll definitely have to take responsibility for.
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wangxianficfinder · 24 days
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Fic Finder
Aug 29th
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1. hello! i’ve been looking for a fic that involves an OC (i think?) that acts as a beard for nie huaisang. it was wangxian centric but that’s the main detail i remember. thank you!
FOUND? 🧡 Stunted, Starving Juvenility by TomatenMark (E, 859k, WangXian, WIP, Fix-it of sorts, Talisman master WWX, Not JFM Friendly, Study Arc, Getting together, Fluff and Angst, Engagement) has NHS getting himself engaged to a female OC that he has no romantic interest in (& vice versa - she's a lesbian) because she has useful skills
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2. hi! Do you recall a fic where wwx was like an omega courtesan in a school who was bought by lxc for lwj. Mianmian was also there with him too for a bit. I remember a scene where lwj got mad at wwx for wanting to wash him. They fall in love eventually. If you could find this fic I'd be grateful! 🙏
FOUND! Rattling our cages by danegen (E, 69k, wangxian, A/B/O, but like polite, Slow Burn, Pining while fucking, so much hair combing, WWX has a vagina, POV WWX, no yin iron or wars or plot really, Canon Era, spiders–see the notes, Spanish Translation Available)
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3. Hello! Thank you for all the work that you all do <3
I've been trying to look for a fic for some time now. I think it had wangxian pretty much adopting a little girl. Like the girl is an orphan and just keeps clinging to wx and being super sticky and I think there was a plot in her backstory dealing with resentment. Wwx knew abt it but lwj did not figure it out until later i think. This girl just accompanied them on some nighthunt or smth. The story has the Lan take in orphans due to reasons(tm) and the girl was one of them.
FOUND! the low sky, raining over by chibilwj (thelogicoftaste) (M, 37k, WangXian, Post-Canon, Established Relationship, Kid Fic)
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4. Hi. I have a fic to find. In this fic, instead of Yanli dying at Nightless City, Lan Zhan gets critically injured and it sends Wei Wuxian into a spiral. Lan Xichen is very angry at him and will not let him anywhere near his body.
Thank you for your help.
FOUND? If I Could Go Back in Time by Runningbarefoot (M, 122k, WangXian, NieLan, Canon Divergence, Role Reversal, Somebody Lives/Not Everyone Dies, Pining, Angst with a Happy Ending, Grief/Mourning, YL WWX, Eventual Happy Ending, The Twin Jade Brotherhood, Hurt/Comfort, Character Study, Twin Prides of Yúnmèng Dynamics, Slow Burn)
FOUND? 🔒❤️ kick at the darkness ‘til it bleeds daylight by AlfAlfAlfAlfAlf, tardigradeschool (T, 75k, WangXian, Hurt/Comfort, Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Eventual Happy Ending, Getting Together, Burial Mounds Settlement Days, Inspired by The Parent Trap (1998), Kid Fic, teen shenanigans, two a-yuans, Fluff and Angst)
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5. hi this is for fic finder!! i’m looking for a fic where wangxian leave the cultivation world for a while with lan sizhui and only come back accidentally. i’m pretty sure everyone else thinks they’re dead and they might have been residing with baoshan sanren in her mountain. thank you!
FOUND? If It's Too Hard To Forgive by Machevalli (M, 94k, WIP, WangXian, XuanLi, Somebody Lives/Not Everyone Dies, Fluff and Angst, Bittersweet Ending, Yunmeng Jiang Sect Bashing, WWX Leaves the Yunmeng Jiang Sect, Top LWJ/Bottom WWX, Mpreg)
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6. Hello! I'm looking for a WangXian fic, they were both dragon shapeshifters, but they met each other in their dragon forms. They both assumed that the other was a regular dragon and both made the decision to commit to the relationship and live out their lives as dragons from now on. I think only when JYL visited and WWX turned human for her, LWJ realized that he was a shifter too. It might have been a twitter thread fic. Thank you so much for your help!!
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7. Looking for an arranged marriage au for wangxian. Yiling laozu wwx, he and lz don't know each other and lz is initially worried cause of wwx reputation. Wwx does the marriage, but doesn't immediately trust lz cause he could be a spy/sent to hurt wwx etc. Specifically there was a scene where people came and attacked wwx's household, I think wwx was away. Everyone hid in the cellars only to realize a-yuan was missing. Lz goes after him and saves a-yuan from being harmed but gets badly hurt.
This leads wwx to realize he can trust lz. Wwx may have taken lz's sword away before the attack cause of a misunderstanding and lz fought to protect everyone any way. And I think another scene lz comes out in his night clothes and yells at a group of cultivators who had come to rescue lz cause they thought something happened to him and lz is like why r yall breaking into my house in the middle of the night and the cultivators (lxc might have been with them) were like this is awkward.
but mebbe I just made it up/misremembered or accidentally combined things?
FOUND? 💖🔒 love, in fire and blood by cicer (E, 360k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, YLLZ WWX, Arranged Marriage, political scheming, Gratuitous Domesticity, Mutual Pining, EXTREME SLOWBURN, the inherent eroticism of the forehead ribbon, The Mortifying Ordeal of Being Known, neither wwx nor lwj want to be Perceived, but sorry kids! it’s gonna happen!, rated E but the the NSFW stuff doesn’t begin until chapter 19!, bottom LWJ in chapter 20 and 27, Mojo’s post)
FOUND? Caught Between Sun and Shadows by Alliandra (E, 71k, wangxian, LXC & LWJ, grapshic depictions of violence, sunshot campaign, arranged marriage, YLLZ WWX, pining, battle husbands, versatile wangxian, falling in love, resentacles, sex pollen, fuck or die, golden core reveal, politics, hurt/comfort) also sounds like
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8. Fic finder? I'm suspecting it has been deleted but I need to try. It's a fanfic where wwx attempts s*ic*de (suicide) and jc finds him in the bathroom. He calls 911, he's hospitalized and all of that. Please help me 🥲🥲
FOUND! 总有一天; a place to hide (can’t find one near) by yiqie (E, 76k, WangXian, Modern AU, Pianist, Getting Together, Mental Health Issues, Suicide Attempt, Suicidal Thoughts, Depression, Hospitals, Overdosing, Eventual Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Additional Warnings In Author’s Note)
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9. a modern AU where LWJ and WWX reconnected at a party when Su She was hitting in LWJ, takes place in grad school and WWX doesn’t know they were dating until the end when they visit LWJ’s uncle’s cottage
thank you so much for your help!! @anonionsodelicious
FOUND? without your new eyes by anaphoricae (E, 66k, WangXian, Modern, Didn’t Know They Were Dating, Sexuality Discovery, Self-Discovery, Literal Sleeping Together, (there is so much sleeping in this fic), mentions of WWX/others and LWJ/others, Drunk LWJ, Teacher LWJ, WWX is a… throws dart… computer scientist, No Angst, Jealous WWX, Flirty WWX, Eventual Smut, Bottom LWJ, Fluff, Non-Sexual Intimacy, WWX’s Love Language is Physical Touch, Guess what: even more non-sexual sleeping together, the plot of the fic is just… co-sleeping, call it the Nap Fic ™, Podfic Available, WWX isn’t so much 'oblivious’ as he is wilfully blocking some feelings subconsciously, WWX 'idk how I feel’ to 'I’m gonna marry him’ pipeline)
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10. Hi im looking for a specific fic. The fic was on ao3 and was a modern au where Wei Ying realizes he might be a bit gay and kisses lan zhan but then freaks out, and they get a bit awkward. He then goes on to forums to see what others might think of his situation, he tries watching gay porn etc. and finds that he's dreaming of lan zhan. He ends up being jumped by homophobes goes on a drinking binge for the next few days as a result and hears that lan zhan has been staying in his room and hasn't been doing well, wei ying thinks it's because he kissed him but later finds out he sent lan zhan a homophobic message when drunk. Any help would be appreciated!!! @livesformitski
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11. Hello! I was hoping you can help me track this fic down!
In the fic Lan Zhan finds out about Wei Yings golden core and he schemes to get it back with Wen Qing no matter what. I think it was a dark lan Zhan fic?
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12. For FF, I am once again asking for wlw wangxian fics. There’s a specific one I can’t seem to find, wherein Lwj and wwx are roommates, and wwx is planning on moving out to mm’s bc she constantly hears lwj hooking up in her room, but there’s an issue at the new place or something so she keeps putting off moving out until eventually she’s convinced to stay when they get together
I’ve tried digging through tags but it’s giving me issues, I would appreciate you forever if you find it🙏🙏🙏
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13. Hi I'm looking for this wangxian fic but can't find it anywhere, I don't remember a lot but all I remember is lan wangji getting his lashes punishment and wei wuxian (who is alive) turning up getting angry and destroying all the clans. Yanli (also alive) - and I think zixuan- was like ' well what do you all expect, you've all brought this on yourselves'
Sorry I can't remember much else,
Thank you ☺️ @haseenaay99
FOUND? An arrow to the heart by IsilmeLasgalen (T, 47k, WangXian, SongXiao, XuanLi, ZhuiYi, LQY/NMJ, XiSang, A-qing/OYZZ, BSSR/LY, WangXian Get a Happy Ending, YLLZ WWX, WWX Lives, BAMF JYL, Protective WWX, Good Parents LWJ and WWX, Married WangXian Have Children, JGS "falls" down the stairs, Bad Parents JFM and YZY, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, JYL Lives, JZX Lives, Protective WN, Implied/Referenced Abuse, POV Multiple, Post-Sunshot Campaign, Cultivation Sect Politics)
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14. I'm looking for a Modern AU crack-fic-ish from Jiang Cheng's POV (I think?) where Wei Ying seems obliviously in a relationship, and later married, to Lan Zhan. It's also implied that maybe they're just trolling Jiang Cheng. @hiperfyxation
FOUND? Six in one hand by deliciousblizzardshark (T, 2k, WangXian, Modern: No Powers, Crack Treated Seriously, Compulsory Heterosexuality, POV JC)
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15. Hi i need help looking for a fic. I don’t remember much but it was a sort of time travel fic where wei wuxian goes back in time. I think there was a scene during the sun shot campaign where wangxian confess? I remember lan wangji being jealous of his future/ alternate self who is wwx’s husband
I’m so sorry I don’t remember more but please help me find this fic 🥹
FOUND! 🔒 if you can’t beat them, recruit them by moeblobmegane (T, 228k, Wangxian, NHS & WWX, WWX & WQ, Time Travel Fix-It, Conspiracy, Spies & Secret Agents, Team as Family, Found Family, Burial Mounds, Temporary Character Death, Canon-Typical Violence, Pining, Morally Ambiguous Character, Rumors, Politics, Developing Friendships, Good Uncle LQR, Demonic Cultivation, YilingWei Sect) i think its - chapter 26
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16. Hi, this is for a fic finder. I’m looking for a fic where WWX is a Wen. When Lans were attacked, LWJ, LSJ and LJY were taken to Qishan but were taken under WWX’s wings and they were taken care of. It was lan sect bashing and LQR bashing. LWJ did not return to Lans. I just remember that towards the end of the fic, there was a scene where WWX asked his spies from each sect to come out and MXY came out from Jiang, XY came out from Nie and MY was from Jin. I thought I’ve bookmarked it but could find it. I also have checked Wen WWX compilations and War Prize LWZ compilations. Did not find in either list. I’d appreciate if anyone know the name! Thank you!
FOUND? To the Heavens and the Earth by IsilmeLasgalen (E, 77k, WangXian, WWX is a Wēn, POV LWJ, Good Parent LWJ, Marriage of Convenience, Accidental Marriage, Implied Mpreg, Time Travel, Canon Divergence, WWX Isn't Adopted by the Jiāngs, CSSR and WCZ Live BAMF WWX, BAMF LWJ, Cultivation Sect Politics, Bottom LWJ, Top WWX, POV NHS, Protective LJY, Good Person WRH, Protective LXC, Immortal LWJ and WWX, POV LXC, Mpreg, WangXian in Love, Soft WangXian, WangXian Get a Happy Ending, POV JZX, Emperor WWX, Emperor LWJ, Past WWX/Other(s), Everybody Lives, Fluff, Angst, Smut, LWJ is LJY's Parent)
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17. Hi! I'm trying to find a fic where lej continuously aaja to play cleansing fir wwc but he keeps reusing cuz resentful energy is the only thing holding his body together but the eventually agrees and then almost dies but wen qung is there and then the course reveal happens and it angsty and wwc thinks lans wouldn't have cared if he told them cheating him if resentment could possibly kill him, thanku!
FOUND? 🧡 decay by antebunny (G, 15k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Angst, Misunderstandings, Miscommunication, Fix-It, Angst with a Happy Ending, the fluffiest ending, Hurt/Comfort)
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18. Hello, this is a fic finder ask:
I’m not sure of the entire plot the the fic but I remember Meng Yao getting caught and being slapped by SiSi in front of the other sect leaders because of what he tried to do knowing his mom’s upbringing. He tries to play it off but he gets imprisoned in a Lanling Tower and isn’t allowed to use anything with strings because of what he did to Nie Mingjue.
FOUND? 💖🔒 love, in fire and blood by cicer (E, 360k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, YLLZ WWX, Arranged Marriage, political scheming, Gratuitous Domesticity, Mutual Pining, EXTREME SLOWBURN, the inherent eroticism of the forehead ribbon, The Mortifying Ordeal of Being Known, neither wwx nor lwj want to be Perceived, but sorry kids! it’s gonna happen!, rated E but the the NSFW stuff doesn’t begin until chapter 19!, bottom LWJ in chapter 20 and 27, Mojo’s post) I think #18 is - chapter 30. But its only has the slapping part
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19. hi, I have a finder fic ask, well two actually:
A. jin guangshan tries to assault yanli but he is stopped but there’s a plot twist because yanli knew it would happen because jin guangshan has a special garden when he does that to people and she is maybe a time traveler so she sets him up to be caught
B. WWX has died and there’s a celebration happening and there’s this special guest that will be there, possibly called The Painter, and when they get there the guest actually sings the story of how the different sects are hypocrites and the guest curses all of them except Lan Wangji and when the guest goes to leave, they lift up their veil and reveal themselves to be baoshan sanren.
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20. Hi!!! I hope you're doing well. Please help me find this fic. It's a modern setting one, where I think WWX is sending LWJ suggestive pictures and videos of himself, and LWJ just doesn't know who it is. I think WWX is some kind of IT or something. I came across this fic on Twitter/X in a promotional of the AO3 fic, but I can't find it anymore. I forgot the parts of the fic but I know there's pictures and chat logs inserted in the fic. Please help me and thank you so much!!!
FOUND? might be this thread (unrolled because I don't have twitter)
also on ao3 its called + xx xxx xxx xxxx by 3neetee (E, 12k, WangXian, Modern, Shameless Smut, PWP, Dom/sub, Stalker WWX, Manipulative LWJ, Anal Sex, Anal Fingering, Masturbation, Rimming, Spanking, Spit Kink, Under-negotiated Kink, Identity Porn, Explicit/NSFW Pictures, Twitter threadfic, Semi-Public Sex, freak4freak wangxian)
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angelsdean · 25 days
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thinking abt actual 29 yr old mary coming back in s12. her sons are a decade older than her. she looks closer in age to claire. dean's mentor and parental instincts see her and want to adopt her and protect her but they're at war with his "but that's my mommy" feelings and wanting HER to protect and take care of him like he never was and she's mourning her little babies who she remembers just tucking into bed and she cries when she sees moms at the park with their kid and she needs to leave she needs to leave this is all so so overwhelming and she does what's familiar what's a second skin, she hunts. she hunts and she meets claire and jody and donna along the way and she stays with them and she tries to heal and she misses her babies and her babies are gone, they're men, they're older than she ever was and she can't quite look at them, and they look at her as if she has all the answers, as if she can heal every hurt, but she still feels so young and new herself and she never felt like she really knew how to BE a mom even with her babies, she never felt like she fit the mold, left her babies at home to keep hunting because she could never really quit, knowing what's out there. tried to be the housewife and the model mother but sundresses and baby pink nightgowns were never really her style and now she's 29 and alive again and she cuts all her hair off and wipes her face clean and puts on her son's flannels and really sees herself for the first time
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a-little-lostmoon · 1 year
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Currently thinking abt Jingliu’s story quest, spoiler’s ahead beware —
I’m thinking about how much of an impact Jingliu’s torture had on Blade and how fucking devastated Jingliu must’ve been to go through with it. I’m thinking about how Yingxing must’ve still been reeling from the new effects of the abundance and his possible regret and grief for ending up as the very thing he hated and swore to fight against—
I’m thinking about the way Jingliu must have chased him down after hearing or- or seeing and experiencing them attempt that resurrection and feeling utterly betrayed by two of her closest friends— two people who were supposed to be Baiheng’s closest friends— (How could they do that, how could they do that, how could they do that?!) —and swinging her sword, the Shard Sword (the one he made— the one he gave to her), at him mindlessly and hurt, with the intent to make Yingxing feel the same way.
I’m thinking about how Yingxing must’ve first felt when he died — the first taste of nothingness to cleanse him of the utter agony of devastation and grief, and then the horrible feeling of everything when he was resurrected again. I think about the way Yingxing, so open and honest, feeling so deeply, must’ve ley out a sob when his chest began to heave again. I think about the way Jingliu must’ve watched with tears of frustration and agony shining in her own eyes. (You did this to yourself. I failed by not stopping you but you and Yinyue-jun were the ones who disgraced her memory first — you have no right to cry like that!)
I think about the way Jingliu must’ve made a conscious effort to destroy his hands— his pride and joy, the ones that made the Shard Sword she turned against its creator. I imagine her throwing it on the ground after the first— or one of the first few of his many deaths, telling him to “Rise” and “Stand” to face her, forcing him to fight over and over again living over a hundred deaths as punishment for what he did.
I think about the way ‘Yingxing’ must’ve slowly died in this process of hours or days of endless torture and punishment with his heart as an artist splayed out and destroyed, flesh bared and heart unbeating as the artist in his mind marvels at the beauty and fantastical agony that became his existence until he no longer thinks; mind rewritten with Jingliu’s preachings of “The three who must pay the price.” and her merciless sword techniques and lessons. I think of how Yingxing, the existence that he was, had truly been killed and warped in all the suffering Jingliu imparted on him — and I wonder how they could ever mend that bridge again.
I think about Jingliu stopping only after the hundredth death as now Blade stands on steady feet with muscle memory from the past nth deaths until Jingliu turns her back with her final lesson and parting words; satisfied, but not fulfilled, by the way she’s carved her presence and regrets into Blade’s mind and body irreversibly. I think about the way she spared ‘mercy’ to him by leaving him astray and to escape the Xianzhou and Luofu. I think about the effort it must’ve taken Blade to chose aimless wandering over eternal sentence… or maybe that too had been Jingliu’s choice.
I think about Jingliu, walking away with nothing but white noise and mara screams, echos of the past, filling her mind until her body gives out from restless days of fighting Blade, forcing onto him the punishment she so strongly believed he deserved — because she couldn’t rest until the lesson had finally set in, what kind of teacher would she have been if she had? I’m thinking about the way her body collapses to the ground like a puppet cut from its strings with no one to catch her and no one to see her at her weakest as she mourns for everything they once had but can never have again because of what they did. Because of what all of them have become.
And finally, I think about the reports that must eventually reach Jing Yuan at the divine seat of foresight. I think about the way he must feel; knowing one of his friends is irreversibly dead and the other three have torn each other apart in that grief. I think about how destroyed he must be, choosing between his duty and his lovers— but finding all too much fault in the choices they made and the suffering they have caused. I think about the decisions he would have to make and the punishment he’d have to invoke on Dan Feng becoming Dan Heng in spite of his emotions, because he is the last one left. And if no one else can remain on the Luofu then he must be the one to carry their memories.
I think that the High Cloud Quintet are irreversibly scarred by themselves and by each other, and I wonder how they’ll ever be able to mend things.
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read-write-thrive · 17 days
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JATP x DBDA crossover where the Phantoms are free but Willie still isn’t and Caleb is playing dirty now that the boys have bested him (possessing Nick but also cmon he definitely has more magic up his sleeve) so they start trying to figure out Magic on their own, which is really just Julie and Flynn googling things and trying out various types of magic/spells/scam artists in the area, only for someone to come across something to do with the DBDA who are happy to take the case 👀
I have too many WIPs for this but just some ideas floating around my head:
- Crystal at first butts heads with Julie and Flynn (residual mean girl tendencies/differing senses of humor) but end up bonding over being surrounded by (dumb) dead teenage boys
- None of the Phantoms are good at proper spells but their music 100% has magical properties that is utilised in whatever final battle type event happens
- Edwin has come to terms with Charles’s eccentricities but the Phantoms are a whole other type of teenage boy and I think he would be just so catty about it all. Like why are they cute and so stupid this is ridiculous why the Hell did we even take this case can they please take this seriously
- Charles and Reggie vibe. I don’t make the rules
- Flynn can’t see the boys either which naturally leads to hijinks
- Monty attends a concert (he deserves to have fun) and while I considered him being the link between the two groups I think it would be funnier if he decided to go to a concert and runs into them coincidentally
- Based on a precursory AO3 search I’ve seen some fics where Monty gets in trouble with Caleb which makes sense with the whole magic familiar angle but I’m not copying here so I won’t get into that
- I think Willie interacting with DBDA would be wild. Like. Dead pretty boy with a sense of humour and tragic backstory? They’re all swooning fr
- Niko (shhh) gets along with Julie and Flynn IMMEDIATELY like they are talking about shows and DIYing things together and it’s great
- Crystal gets along better/faster with Julie and Flynn with Niko present fs
- There’s at least one dance number with everyone involved
- possessed!Nick is still trying to woo Julie and not only do we get the Phantoms side eyeing him but now we get the DBDA just openly judging him (Crystal roasts the shit out of that fedora and she’s RIGHT)
- Crystal would decimate any of Carrie’s attempts at being bitchy so I think we have to redeem Carrie for that reason alone
- DBDA goes to a JATP concert and the boys are actually awful at vibing there. Like Crystal is relatively normal (idk if it’s her scene but she’s been to concerts before) but Edwin does not know what to do at a modern concert and Charles is used to a much different style of dancing/concerts (I don’t know enough abt aka punk to elaborate unfortunately but ykwim)
- girls night includes style swapping bc the DBDA girlies deserve some butterfly clips and the JATP girlies deserve some eyeliner
- in the nature of JATP I don’t think Caleb gets sent to hell in the end but I do think his ending needs to be ridiculous. Like have him get the Night Nurse treatment and get eaten by that fish so he can be redeemed by Kashi
- not to bring up Monty again but I think he sticks around and keeps up with the JATP crew more than the DBDA (he is not interested in any more of that Hell/monster energy and that’s so valid of him)
- montage of Edwin and Charles teaching the Phantoms ghost abilities (I can’t remember if/how they vary between shows but if so shhh or explain it away yk)
- Unseen Emily reprise and it’s all the boys mourning loved ones. Just for the feels.
- Actually just more backstories for everyone please
- Love ballad/slow song that Willex and/or Payneland dance to 🥰
- Palasaki being openly in love (which inspires whatever the Flynn x Carrie ship is bc I love them)
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sweetvelaryon · 6 months
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thinking about how if Luke had survived Storms End when straight back to his mom right when they were having his funeral and they all believe their seeing a ghost. when he finally hugs them they believe otherwise. Jace vows to never send him again to danger and literally just follows his shadow for the remainder of the wars to come. when aemond finds out he doesn't believe it. he thinks it's a ploy by the blacks. Luke had claimed the cannibal and was still very much involved in the battles for the sake of his mother. plus he had Jace in his shadow constantly. Aegon and Aemond couldn't "jump" rhaenys like they planned because Luke and Jace were there. unlike Meleys and Vermax, Cannibal literally could not give a single fuck in which dragon he gets to kill. it makes his connection with Luke strong bc he's still mourning the loss of his dear sister and dragon. its almost as if Aemond killed the Velaryon Strong side of him leaving the pure Targaryen rage built over years from bullying and hearing the rumors spread abt them. when they win and take Aemond and Aegon as prisoners Rhaenyra wants them to suffer but she still wanted to prove to Alicent she wasn't just some mindless, rage driven Targaryen like Otto painted her out to be. years passed and slowly Aegon and Aemond were given small privileges to roam around the castle. Aemond always tried to apologize and talk to Luke, but as always Jace was in his shadow. wherever Luke went Jace wasn't fair behind. this led to an obsession between the brothers. Lucerys felt desired by his brother constantly being with him. Jacaerys felt the overprotective need to be by Luke. this also led to his neglect in his upcoming duties as heir. while Aemond failed and gave up in trying to be forgiven by his nephew. meanwhile Jacaerys obsession led to finally being between his brothers legs and never letting him go again.
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