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i've been listening to one direction for the last 3 days pls send help i miss them so much
#remember when we woke up and there was a bunch of new stuff#like pics and gifs and videos and tweets and all the good stuff#not to be dramatic but i don't think i will ever feel that kind of happiness again#i miss them so much i would sacrifice my non existent child for a 1d reunion#like yeah solo stuff is nice. makes me happy. i love it#am i excited about niall's album? absolutely#but am i as excited as i was before a 1d album release? eh it's close but not the same#fkskf i'm sad
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Happy Wednesday my lovely readers :) Ahhh already 4 eps into this season. Almost half way there. Doesn’t take long when we only got 10. Ha Still grateful for what little we got was better than nothing tbh. Also reached the limit on my master post for links. Apparently there is a limit. Boo. Gotta add a link to a new posts in there for rest of the reviews. Was kinda shocked at the lower amount of gifs for this ones. So a lot are the made ones from me. Anyways this is really really good one. Let us begin.
6x04 Training Day
We start out with Lucy being a lying liar who lies. Not even well.... Tim not believing her even a little bit that she’s "fine." One of Lucy’s tells is her fidgeting. Whether it’s her hands, her sleeves, and the ever infamous tattoo touch she does. All indicators she is anything but fine. Tim is well versed in all of these things. Because he has the book of Lucy memorized. Her telling him it’s ’Not a big deal.’ Is a big ol red flag for him.
Tim voicing as such to her. Letting her know anytime he’s heard that from a woman in his life they were anything but that. Lucy keeps pretending she’s made peace with it. That’s she’s a professional. She will keep on keeping on. But as we know with this episode that is a load of absolute BS. It's one thing after another for her in this one only adding to very 'not fine' she is. Poor girl.
They do turn a cute corner with her asking if he wants her to be upset? Tim replying of course he doesn't. But the man is worried. Rightfully so. The smile on her face when she asks this is adorable though. They have a nice little moment of reprieve till numbskull Nolan appears. Bringing up the very thing that is eating at her. Her short ‘I’m fine.' Before taking off. Ugh. Undoing any progress Tim made. Thanks John forever the worst with that stuff. Smh. The way Tim’s eyes follow her after that. *sigh*
So begins the hell episode for Lucy. She shows up to the scene asking about their killer. Then asks Harper/Angela if they want her to start canvassing? They tell her yeah the northwest corner. Lucy making a crack no one has covered it yet because it’s by the ‘Hell dumpsters’. Their sassy looks say everything. Lucy spitting back a company line about being a patrol officer. Oh my girl. It’s hitting her so hard she’s still a patrol officer. Feeling like at this point in her career her talents are being wasted. I mean they are…That much is clear in this moment.
Her expression at the end of the scene says everything tbh. About all that frustration and feeling like a failure. This is the starting point of Lucy isolating herself. I know everyone thought she had zero support. To me and I know others said it during the season too. That she isolated herself. Because just like Tim when she is going through something she does it alone. She is internalizing EVERYTHING right now. I have been known to do this as well. The need to shutdown and do it alone. I can relate to her.
She has a solid support system but that doesn’t mean she’s taking advantage of said system. I can relate to that very well too. It took awhile but I now have a solid system. I don’t always rely on them in times of emotional distress. It’s a learned skill. One I'm still learning to use. We talk about Tim and his need for therapy. Lucy needs it too. They’re scarily alike in their unhealthy coping mechanisms. It’s frightening really. Also the song running through this is so good (Dandelion-ill peach)
This next portion is the beginning of her spiral as well. It’s wrapped inside her isolation. It’s a recipe for disaster as we see later on... The isolation continues while she is guarding the dumpsters solo. If there was ever a time Lucy didn’t need to be alone with her thoughts it would be today. She spots some puke and thinks it might be from the killer. Calls Harper and tells her as such.
Harper tells her it’s unlikely to be related but they’ll need to process it anyways. Unfortunately it is only going to extend her time in hell. Nyla telling her could take a couple hours. 4 tops…Ugh. Not exactly what her day needs. Doesn’t help Harper cuts her off on the phone before she can finish her sentence. *sigh* Now Lucy is left to sit in her thoughts and stew in her emotions. I believe this episode was setup to reflect how Lucy is feeling.
Which honestly is like shit. How she feels alone (self inflicted or not), how she’s falling behind and feelings of failure. It’s reflected in all her scenes in this one. It’s a tough one to watch for her. She’s feeling very segregated and this dumpster canvass isn’t helping. As we know our girl isn’t very good at spotting when she’s being emotionally blind to her own feelings. Nor realizing when she’s not reaching out for the help she needs. The thing about support systems is they can’t be mind readers. You gotta relay when you need that support.
Lucy watching that press conference is killing me softly. You can see so much emotion written all over her face. The jealously and the annoyance of not being the one up there. Because well she almost was. It was just dumb luck (title of Nolan’s career) that they got that call and she didn’t. Ain't nothing going our girl's way today and it shows. She is a seething cauldron of emotions that she is tamping down under the guise of being ‘fine’
I do LOVE her waiting on Tim so they can go home together. (Also the hands in his jeans, the shirt, the jacket. Mmm gimme) It’s the little married things that get me all amped up. Waiting on her man to go home. It makes me so happy and squee. She needs it more than ever too. I swear at this moment in time the only keeping her sanity intact is that man.
He reads her like a book from moment he sees her though. Knows what her sour mood is all about. That if only Primm had seen her linked to this case. Seen this press conference it would’ve proved him wrong about her. Made him regret tanking her exam. Damn he knows his girl. Because that's exactly what her face is conveying in the very beginning of this scene.
Lucy notes instead of that she was stuck in dumpster hell. Not only that but she guarded puke for 3 hours. Based on the off chance it belonged to the killer. Tim asking if it did? Hoping to God it did LOL It’s the way Melissa delivers the sick dog line that cracks me up. How she could easily lose her shit right now. Like that was the straw that broke the camel's back for her today.
Ugh I hate it so much for her. She was already all up in her thoughts and failures. Probably thinking why her? What can’t she have even the simplest win? That she’s been resigned to guarding puke and it not even being helpful. That it should be her up there not Nolan. I mean I agree it should be. This is all just percolating toward the rash decision she makes later.
So damn desperate to prove she’s worth her salt. That this is the career for her. She’s meant to do so much more than patrol, canvassing, and general grunt work. Our girl is in dire straits and Tim can see it clear as day. Which is what makes this next portion so sweet and important tbh. Also doesn’t hurt there are more married vibes attached to it.
I love the gentle advice given here from Tim. She’s had a really bad day and he’s being sensitive to it. Doling out solid guidance but being soft about it. Applying logic with empathy so she gets his point but also doesn’t get more upset. Tim can see how this rough shift has rocked her. Especially when she is already on shaky ground. This man like I’ve been saying has been 10/10 for her. Idk what she would’ve done without him eps 1-4 I really don’t.
The beauty of this scene is him empathizing and building her back her up in the process. Reassuring her in the kindest way. That yeah you had a bad day, you’ll have 'em again, but tomorrow could be a whole new ball game for her. That being on patrol is an 'anything can happen game.' Knowing she is down about patrol right now. The man knows. Then is positive about it. Saying today wasn’t her day but tomorrow could be. I love this man so very much. As does Lucy.
I just love the ‘share our day’ marriage vibes this scene holds. Tim sees she had the tougher day and is there for her. Lucy getting lighter as they continue to talk. Something Tim is very good at. The best part of this scene is he gets her to laugh.
After he’s said his piece and comforted her he takes it a step further. Makes his lady laugh and we’re all here for it. Telling her not to be so greedy LOL It’s the way Lucy is looking at him that gets me in the first one. Her Tim smile in full force. Then their precious combined smiles in the second one. God damnit they’re so cute you guys.
I’m dying. They make each other so happy I wanna cry. The lack of space and how they bump arms as they laugh. Just being in love with all to see I cannot. Lucy being grateful for this goof of a man making her smile. For relieving her even if it's just for a short while of that weight on her soul. Letting him carry it with her for a bit. *heart clutch* I love them sfm.
First off before we delve into this part, I wanna say Lucy is an absolute BAMF is in the moments leading up to Harper/Angela arriving. How calm and collected she is. Making sure to cover Bailey as she gets her downed partner. If she could see herself in this moment she wouldn’t have so many doubts. But sadly that is not how crippling self esteem/confidence issues work. I just love watching her in the field and how well she handles herself.
Second my heart was racing from moment that man is shot in the chest. The entire moment is one giant adrenaline rush. Holy hell. Lucy covers for the duo until they reach her cover. Their airship is three minutes out and Lucy doesn’t think they can afford to wait. Wants to run down the alleyway solo. Cut him off so he doesn’t get away. That desperate need to prove herself rearing it’s ugly head.
Not only that but it is running the show for her right now. Harper immediately says no. That’s it's a 40 yard run in an open field. Lucy isn’t listening to her advice though. Level headed Lucy would've heeded her warning. Once again this season she is not with us in this moment. Saying to blow his head off if he pops up. That she’ll be alright. Angela doesn’t look pleased with this idea either. I mean look at her above. Concern written all over her. Her gut feeling screaming this isn't a good idea....But Lucy is hell bent on it.
This run had me holding my friggin breath. Tim would’ve lost his damn mind had he seen this. Not only that he would’ve ripped them a new one to letting her attempt it. When she got hit first time watched it I screamed. Held my breath until she got back up. Angela and Harper’s horrified faces mirrored my own. Couldn’t breathe till she popped back up. It was the most reckless risk she could've taken.
She is very very lucky her radio took the hit. It saved her damn life after that crazy run of hers. Lucy taking Tim's suggestion of being a big hero a little too literally. Honestly would’ve loved to have seen Tim tear them up for letting her do this... Reckless doesn’t seem strong enough of a word with this action. This decision of hers is a culmination of an episode long isolation. Of letting her emotions run the show and she took a risk that could've killed her. All to proof she could do it.
She had definitely given into those voices in her head telling her she’s not enough. Telling her she needs to prove herself or no one will ever think she’s worthy of moving up. To show she doesn't belong on patrol anymore. If she had just told her support system and really Tim how she was feeling. She wouldn’t have been this damn hasty. Lucy wasn’t thinking about what would happen if her radio didn’t catch that bullet. How utterly wrecked Tim would be if she had been hurt or even worse killed.
The problem being she kept all these emotions and struggles to herself. Which clouded her judgement. Her brain wasn't thinking in this capacity. This moment showing the continued communication problems in their relationship. How her decision could've really affected Tim. She wasn't thinking that in the moment though. Their communication issues go both ways with them. When they’re feeling emotionally distraught or vulnerable they isolate and take their problem on themselves.
Which results in foolish and hasty decisions. I.e. this moment above. And in next 2 eps with Tim...Something they gotta work on either before they’re back together or in the early repairing of their relationship. We get to see her KIA radio once she is clear. It very much saved her life and is now useless to her. I do love how she communicates with them before she pursues Jeff. Harper commending her on being smart in this moment. I mean they're in it now. So every move she makes from here on out has to be smart.
Lucy catches Jeff in the alleyway just like she wanted. Unfortunately he doesn’t look like he is interested in surrendering. Melissa crushes this scene oh my lord. The shaky way her voice breaks when she tells him to stop. To put his weapon down. Trying so hard to prevent a deadly outcome. I’m getting 5x19 flashbacks for her in this moment. Lucy dealing with the same issue Tim had. A person willing to die instead of give up. Despite them wanting to concede.
Lucy is basically pleading with this man to give up. She doesn’t want to shoot him. Doesn’t want it to end this way. Lucy is an empath as we all know. So her shooting him right or not she is going to carry it on her soul regardless. It’ll be a stain on it because she would’ve done anything to avoid this.
Lucy is on the verge of tears when she calls out Code 4. That the shooter is down. Ugh my heart. Adrenaline from end to end with this moment. Having it finish with a bang made my stomach sink for her. We watch how it affected Harper in 6x01 and she’s seasoned. How it affected Tim in 5x19. It’s never anything I wanna see our characters go through. Felt like I couldn’t catch my breath even after he was done. Such a good scene though.
Then comes the best part of the episode. Tim storming in like the worried husband he is. He has her work bag and I wanna cry. He has a death grip on it as he searches for the desk. I just love that he made sure to grab her bag before rushing off to the hospital. Man is on a mission to find her. Nothing matters to him but her in this moment. It’s the way he goes to the desk and they direct him to her immediately. He thanks the nurse with his tap to the counter.
I can’t imagine how he was when he first got the news. The look of sheer worry painted across his face when he steps foot into that hospital. Worried Tim is everything and Eric conveyed so much in these first two gifs. The first one is all concern and anxiety. He can’t breathe until he has laid eyes on his girl. The second one is relief in finding her. Tim completely by passes the gaggle of people outside of her room.
Doesn’t check in with them or see what happened at the scene. All that matters to him is getting to her. It’s the way he stops before he enters in. Taking a beat for the first time since he arrived. Then steeling some resolve knowing he needs it be her rock in this moment. Once he does this he steps into her room. Checking in and asking her if she’s hurt? He’s so gentle and soft like we all expect at this point with him. Doesn't take his eyes off her for one second as he sets her bag down.
Per usual the music department be killing it out here with the song selection. The soothing guitar and the singers soft voice are the perfect backdrop to this scene. His voice is as tender and comforting as Tim's tone through out the scene. Once again Melissa and Eric are the epitome of chemistry. Their amazing acting chops shining through in this moment. Melissa got me crying and all in my feels. Once Tim knows she’s physically ok it’s time to take care of her emotionally. The hand to her hair has me reeling. The way he strokes her head it’s so intimate and gentle.
Telling her she didn’t have to take his suggestion so literally. My heart. It’s all ‘hands hands hands’ from here on out. Like I said in 6x02 their physical chemistry forever floors me. It’s also just so damn sweet. Like he has to be touching her in order to know she’s ok. To reassure himself that she’s actually sitting in front of him right now. Saw a great tag said whenever we get hands like this makes them feral. How I felt about this entire scene.
So many wonderful facets to fangirl about and be feral over tbh. The man can’t stop touching her and I’m here for it. From the moment he was allowed to he was off to the races. Makes my heart so happy. He’s so tactile with her. It makes me wanna scream into a pillow. Touch is one of his languages with her but also their love language as well. It shows constantly. Honestly getting this soft scene after that adrenaline fest was much needed. That whole shooting scene had my blood pressure up.
I’m just bawling for Lucy after this. We get to see all she's been holding in. How incredibly upset she is about this whole situation. It's here with Tim comforting her she finally lets her walls down. Because her protector is there. He is there to pick up her broken pieces and put her back together. I know that feeling. Where you've been keeping it together. Then your person comes and asks if you're ok? And you realize how much you're not and the floodgates open.
That's Lucy in this scene. With tears in her eyes she tells him she doesn’t feel like a hero. Tim’s hand hasn’t left her at all btw. They both need this touch to ground them right now. I love how he rubs his thumb up and down her shoulder. Comforting her while she tells him her worst fear. The one thing that's been weighing on her soul since she released that shot in the alley. That she killed Jeff Budney. Asking Tim what if she killed him?
Tim crushing it with the comforting and being calm in his reply. So certain that no matter the outcome it’ll be ok. Why you ask? Because they’re going to deal with it together. The ‘Then we’ll deal with it.’ is EVERYTHING she needs to hear right now. Because yeah it’s bleak right now. But Tim wants to make sure she knows she isn’t alone. That he is there and no matter if he makes it or not he’s by her side. These are the exact reassurances she needs in this moment.
Lucy’s reaction has me crying some more. It’s the stifled cry when he tells her this. The sad shake of her head. Killing me softly. She couldn’t face the possibility of Budney dying. Not until her person showed up. Her fierce protector and love of her life standing by her side. Letting her know it’s ok. Even if it’s not it will be because they’ll face it together. Gah getting emotionally writing this up. This scene was primo on so many levels. *chef kiss.*
It’s here Grey and Wes enter the room. They let our lovely couple know he made it through surgery. Thank you Lord. The relief that floods Lucy is immense. I love how she looks at Tim and shakes her head. Needing his grounding stare as she takes in this news. Making sure it's real. Wes is quite the downer when he tells her for now. That if he dies later the investigation has to resume. The look on Grey’s face like WTF man…Let her have the win.
We see protective Tim step in after this. Asking if she can do her statement tomorrow? All he wants to do at this point is get her away from this hospital. From Jeff Budney and prying eyes. Wade is super sweet and turns on his dad mode and says that’s fine. Tries to get her to look and meet his fatherly gaze. She is too out of it to notice his kind look. All the more reason Tim needs to get her the hell out of this place.
Tim breaks her out of her revere with his touch as she watches them depart. I’m squeeing at the way he squeezes her collarbone, then soothes it with his thumb, before he moves his hand to the back of her neck. All the affectionate touches and very tender comforting has me ship drunk. His hand didn’t leave her for ninety percent of this scene. *happy sigh* He’s trying so hard to keep her there with him. To let her know he’s there and hasn’t left.
It’s the soft way he tells her ‘Let’s go home.’ also has me squeeing. Her home is now his home and I’m bawling. Like I said earlier all he wants to do is take her home and continue the comfort. Knowing the last place she needs to be is here. It’s the sweet smile on his face as he beckons her off the bed. Gah what a good man. Took care of her heart and soul in this moment.
Lucy doesn’t make it far before she is collapsing into his arms. Truly letting her walls down in full. Relaxing for the first time and melting completely against him. It’s the way she folds into his arms so easily. How he has her wrapped up in them immediately. Shielding her from the rest of the hospital. From this situation. One hand in her hair cradling her gently to his chest. How he is softly cupping the back of her head. The other wrapped around her nice and tight. Cocooning her in his embrace. His eyes shutting the minute he can feel her safely in his arms.
Tim breathing for the first time since he entered this room. All the while giving her the comfort zone of being in his arms. Gah it’s the slight sway that goes along with it that has me swooning. Rocking her in his arms sweetly. Trying to give her the solace she had been craving since that alleyway. Lucy hiding her face happily in his chest as he does this. Her hand placed on his chest as well has me happily sighing. No one does hugs quite like our couple does. The emotions they evoke out of me is unreal. They are top tier goodness.
To make the hug even sweeter we get a kiss to the head. The way Lucy wraps her arms around his back fully as he does this. Grounding her further as he takes care of her. They continue their lovely swaying as Tim places his cheek on her head. Resting it there lovingly. There’s a reason I kept this hug as my banner. Not that I don’t love the elevator hug in 6x09. I love it so much and will gush when we get there. But this hug ranks up there as top ones for me. Why you ask?
This hug just exemplifies how they provide comfort for each other. How physical touch is one of their primary love languages. They are each other's sanctuary. A happy and safe place amid the darkness their job brings. Coupled with the song playing in the background, the moment becomes even more glorious. It’s a beautiful scene made even more poignant by the this loving embrace.
I'm still not over how beautiful this scene is. You can see the stress and anxiety just drain out of Lucy. From the moment she is in his arms she is at peace. The same for Tim with pulling her into his arms. They both needed this hug so much. The continuity of the head kisses I’m here for as well. Gimme that all day long. In every future hug. I remember thinking as the shot panned out what would she have done without Tim in this moment? Without his wonderfully soothing comfort? Ugh what makes the next set of episode a gut punch that I still haven’t recovered from…
Thanks as always to my amazing readers who like, comment or reblog these reviews. Means the world to me. I shall see you all in 6x05 :)
~~~
Side notes-Non Chenford
I love Aaron going out with Tim for his first day. Going over the T.RA.I.N yummy T.O Tim in a Metro outfit. I will take that at every chance I can get it. If I had only know this was my last ep with him in that outfit would've appreciated it more 😭 Also this gif was for eye candy. Nothing more nothing less. How I wish to be the chair for which he leans upon in this scene. Metro outfit, badge showing, the way he is deliciously leaning against that chair. *fans self* Doesn't hurt Aaron is hilarious in his quest to please Tim LOL
We watch Nolan continue to be a terrible T.O. He lets Celina say a huge no no over the radio smh
Something else wanted to touch on for the Lucy having no support system. What happened with Jeff Budney is the direct result of not relying on said support system. I'm not blaming her. I have been her. Just want to make that very clear. But the gaggle of people outside her room worried about her is that system. Waiting to see what happens to her etc Everyone was worried about her and for her.
Other than Tim she does have it but as we know this season is super rough on her. So that is hard to see. Especially with losing her main pillar of that system in Tim. Which causes her to retreat even farther inside, but that’s for future eps to delve into. I remember D had this great post about how Lucy has been isolating for years. We were just finally seeing the result of that. Very true.
I mean only person she's really let in other than Jackson is Tim. That's it folks. Because she too has walls. She has Tamara but it's not the same as what she has with Tim. Once again hoping s7 resolves this isolation and her career path in the process. I'll be ok with her being put through it if we can have a good conclusion to go along with it.
Lastly the song running through the final scene is ‘Let it all go’ the lighthouse and the whaler. Such a good song.
#Caitlin Rewatches The Rookie#chenford#chenford hiatus#waiting on s7#is it January yet?#summer rewatch#s6#6x04 Training Day#the rookie 6x04#otp: doing my job#otp: you know me so well. too well#otp: some things matter more#otp: you did good#otp: you're nothing like him#otp: just doesn't feel like pretend#otp: unless it is#otp: you could never disappoint me#the rookie#tim x lucy#tim bradford#lucy chen#lucy x tim#eric winter#melissa o'neil#tim bradford x lucy chen
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🦄 Okay so I was thinking about taking care of Chan with a migraine but he keeps trying get work done and gets frustrated because he has deadlines and he doesn’t like making you feel like you have to take care of him because he feels like a burden. But he ends up having a panic attack and throwing up and can’t go to practice the next day 😓
Well, here it is! A surprise Chan sickfic!
Enjoy!
RESPONSIBILITY
Another comeback was just around the corner for Stray Kids, which meant everyone was overwhelmed with stuff to do, ones more than others because of some solo activities. Pre comeback time was specially hard for Chan, since he was the main producer of the group, the weight on his shoulders doubled, tripled.
He had to make new demos, lyrics and everything and it was taking its toll on his health.
While working, he developed a rather strong migraine, that obviously wasn't going to get better because he was always glued the screen and had headphones on. And to top that, the kids were specially hyped.
- Hi babe, how are you?
- Hey, honey, I'm good. What's up? Is everything okay?
- Yeah...uhmm...actually no...I need to work on some new songs and I got a migraine and well...the kids are too loud and I don't want them to stop because of me. Can I come over?
- Of course, babe. I'm at the grocery store right now, what me to pick you up?
- If it's not too much trouble hehe
- I'll be there in five.
He packed his stuff and told the kids you invited him over. He hated having to lie to the members but he didn't want them to feel bad for being too hyped.
You arrived at the dorms and called Chan to come down. He entered the car, gave you a kiss and you left to your house.
You put on some music to try to lighten up the mood a bit since it was rainy and gloomy outside. He was enjoying it, bobbing his head to the beat, which you couldn't help but find adorable.
But you noticed that from time to time he brought a hand to his head and squeezed it, as if trying to control the pain.
- Is it that bad, honey?
- What? Oh, no. Just a little hehe. It stings from time to time.
- Did you take anything?
- No. The medication usually makes me feel sleepy and I have work to do.
- Take it later, please.
- I will.
You arrived at your house, he carried the grocery bags up and helped you sort everything out. And then he went to your study to assemble his mini studio to start working on the songs again.
You asked him if you could keep him company to which he answered yes with a bright smile. The study had a cozy sofa so you just lay there going through your phone, reading and looking at him working.
You noticed how frustrated he was becoming because things were turning out the way he wanted to. He'd squeeze his head between his hands and eventually his frustration got even worse.
- Fuck!
You got startled to see him swearing, which was a rare thing for him, so it meant he was really annoyed.
You got up from the sofa and made your way towards him, you stood behind the chair and massaged his shoulders and he grabbed your hand and kissed it softly.
- I'm sorry, babe.
- It's okay. Why don't you take a little break?
- I can't, honey. I gotta get this done...
- I know but you're only stressing yourself right now. Come on, let's eat something and relax a bit and then you continue with your work. I'm not asking.
- Okay.
You cooked a nice meal for both of you and he loved it. You managed to get him to relax a little in the living room before he headed back to the study to keep on with his work.
Just like before, he didn't want to take anything for his migraine and kept on working through that intense pain.
But the pain only got worse and worse and he wasn't happy with anything he was producing. Nothing was coming out the way he wanted. He took off his headphones and lay back on his chair letting out a heavy sigh. You made your way to him again and once more massaged his shoulders.
- Honey, I think that's enough for today, no?
- I can't babe. I have a deadline, I need this ready as soon as possible.
- I know you have deadlines, but working with a migraine it's not gonna do anything good. You're not satisfied with what your doing I can tell. If you insist on working like that you'll only frustrate yourself even further.
- But I can't rest now. Everyone is waiting for these demos and samples. I-I need to- to finish this-
Suddenly, his talking started to sound low, he could feel his heartbeat increasing rapidly and he was starting to hyperventilate. He was having a panic attack. You noticed the change in his behavior and kneeled in front of him grabbing both his hands.
- Chan, what's wrong?
He tried his best to breathe but it was like no air was going inside. His heartbeat kept increasing and he was sweating as if he had been under the sun for the last few hours.
- Honey, you're having a panic attack. I need you to focus on me okay?
- I-I- can't...I can't do this...
He was starting to break down in tears and it only made his panic attack even worse.
- I-its too much... Everyone is d-depending on me...the producers, the kids, STAYs, you...I c-cant let them down-
- Chan! Stop!
You said firmly as you held his face in your hands.
- I'm right here. You can feel weak. I'm going to protect you.
You squeezed his hands, reassuring him you were there and he was safe.
- Now, look at me. I want you to keep looking at me, okay? Can you feel my hands?
- Y-yes
- Okay. I need you to do it exactly as I say now, okay? I want you to breathe with me. Come on. Breathe in 4, hold it 7 and breathe out 8.
He tried to follow as you said but at first it was difficult, his breathing was too labored and he was too nervous.
- Come on, babe. Look at me. Pay attention to the way I'm breathing. Do it with me. Breathe in 4, hold it 7 and breathe out 8.
He started to pay attention to the rhythm of your breathing and followed your instructions. In a few minutes his breathing was back to normal and his heartbeat lowered as well.
- There we go. Do you feel more calm now?
- Yeah...thank you...
The panic was gone but it was replaced by an awful feeling in his stomach. Nausea built up just as quickly as the panic went away. He felt everything inside his stomach twisting around, before he knew, saliva was starting to fill his mouth.
He ducked his head down and squeezed your hands, to which you reacted surprise, frowning as you looked at him.
- What's wrong?
- I think I'm gonna throw up...
- Oh god.
You quickly grabbed the bin beside the desk and placed it on the floor directly beneath his mouth. You noticed how he was still shaken up by the panic attack and didn't really want to let go of your hand, so you kneeled in front of him again. You didn't care if vomit was going to get on you or not, his well-being and comfort was your priority now.
- Let it all out. It's okay. I'm right here with you.
You squeezed his hand reassuring your words. He squeezed them back as he felt liquid coming up his throat. He closed his eyes and tried to hold it in.
- Don't hold it in, babe. You're okay. It's just you and me. You dont need to act strong.
He trusted every word you said, he knew you meant everything.
His stomach contracted, making his arch his back as a thick wave of partially digested food gushed out of his mouth.
- That's it. You're doing good.
You moved yourself to be on his side and kept holding his hand while the other rubbed his back up and down and then in circles.
He squeezed your hand as another thick stream of vomit came out, mixing with what was already inside the bin.
- I-Im sorry...
- It's okay. Don't apologize. Just focus on letting everything that's making you feel sick, out.
He arched his back one more time as a rather strong contraction sent another thick stream of vomit.
Your heart hurt seeing him like this. You knew how much pressure he put on himself and how he basically carried the weight of the world on his shoulder. You wish you could take that to yourself, but you could only be by his side and reassure him it was okay to feel like this.
He wanted to throw up again but he felt as if something was choking him and not wanting to come out. He kept gagging but nothing was coming out.
- Babe, can you help m-me? There's still something bothering my stomach.
- Sure.
You stopped rubbing his back and instead you brought your hand to his stomach and rubbed it a few times before gently pressing down on it.
That helped him throw up the remaining contents that was still making him feel sick. He spat out thin streams of saliva a few times.
- Are you done?
- Yeah...
- Here. Rinse your mouth.
- Thanks...
- Let me get this away from you.
You took the bin to the bathroom and disposed of the vomit inside it and placed it on the shower so you could properly wash it later.
You came back with more cold water for him and kneeled again taking a good look at him.
- How are you feeling?
- Better...I guess...tired...
You wiped away his tears with your fingers and then gently cupped his face.
- I love you. I'm right here, okay? Always count on me.
- I love you too.
- Come on, let's get you to bed. You need to rest.
You helped him to the bedroom and lay him down and then got him some stomach medicine. He took it and he was so exhausted from everything he was fast asleep in minutes.
You covered him up and left the bedroom for a few minutes to clean the bin and call the members.
- Hi, Minho.
- Oh! Y/n! How are you?
- I'm good. And you guys?
- We're okay? And Chan-hyung?
- Not really... He had a panic attack and threw up after. I don't think it's wise for him to go to practice tomorrow...
- Really? Is he okay now?
- Yeah...he's asleep.
- I'll tell the manager, don't worry. Tell him we want him to get well soon. And also that we're sorry for being too loud today, we didn't know he was feeling that unwell...
- He doesn't blame you guys... He was worried about you, that's why he wanted to come here. But I'll tell him.
- Thanks.
After the call, you went back to the bedroom and lay beside him. He was half-awake for a brief moment and cuddled with you, while you gently rubbed his chest, to keep him relaxed after such a tiring afternoon.
#emeto#sickfic#whump#kpop sickfic#kpop emeto#stray kids emeto#stray kids sickfic#skz emeto#skz fanfic#skz sickfic#skz fluff#skz angst#bang chan emeto#bang chan sickfic#bang chan x reader#hyunjin x reader#felix x reader#jisung x reader#lee know x reader#changbin x reader#seungmin x reader#jeongin x reader
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my top ten favourite PJSK events so far!! (no particular order)
- A Once-In-A-Lifetime Pandemoniun
in general, i love silly little school trip moments!! Pandemonium was just lovely. Rui and the three friends he made <333 2-B boys you will always be famous to me. the surprised Pikachu face Rui pulled every time they were nice to him and included him in their banter, literally wanted to sob. Airi and Tsukasa having to stop Shizuku and Rui wandering off. Shizuku and Tsukasa childhood memories. and of course- well, look at my icon. not to mention the CARD SET??? absolutely beautiful. adore the yokai theme, Rui and Shizuku's cards nearly offed me. i stared at them for a good five minutes when they were first leaked
- No Seek, No Find
this is one of the few events that made me cry. Saki, you will always be my favourite Tenma <3 her frustration while being stuck in the hospital, her fear of being left behind, the unfairness, her loneliness, her guilt for worrying her family, her desire to be "normal"- it was heartbreaking. the card set hits so hard too, my favourite L/n cards. and Tera Tera is always in my head, Saki's solo >>>>
- My Colour
this event literally made me fall in love with Shizuku, i wasn't particularly interested in her too much before. the pressure put on her but then how she finally let herself act like herself <33 she's so hardworking and sweet, live laugh love, Shizuku Hinomori. the cards are so pretty, Shizuku looks so angelic in hers <3 and her solo of Colour of Drops sounds lovely as always too even if it's not a song i care about too much
- Musical Twilight Parade
LEO/NEED AND WONDERLANDS X SHOWTIME!! MY TWO FAVE UNITS HAD A CROSSOVER <33333 I LOVE THEM. the card set was underwhelming yes (only really like Rin's) but!! W x S as tour guides... the shenanigans... literally has one of my favourite moments of all time of Rui teaching the L/n girlies how to trespass, he's such a good influence, isn't he <33 OH YES AND ICHINENE'S FIRST MEETING!! THEY WERE SO AWKWARD AND SHY AROUND EACH OTHER AND NOW THEY'RE SO QUIETLY HAPPY WHEN THEY BUMP INTO EACH OTHER. THEY MEAN SO MUCH TO ME. also, it's a Shiho event so. winner!!
- Don't Lose Faith
Leo/need. Leo/need Cryptonloids. they're all so sweeeet. i love L/n Rin so much <333 i can't put into words why, but i just really like the event story, them training for their concert in Sekai and all with the support of Miku and Co. the cards were really cool (more lims should have dyed hair...) and so is the song, Voices. another Shiho win!!
- A Sorrowful Farewell at the Curtain Call
it's the only event that's got Asahi Genbu in it. that. that is it. oh yeah and W x S was threatened with divorce or something. BUT ASAHI <3 cards were interesting... i like the symbolism but they don't particularly like. interest me greatly? What Sort of Ending Are You Wishing For isn't one of my fave fave songs either... yeah, it was mainly the story that carried this event for me!!
- Insatiable Pale Colour
ENA. ENA. ENA. INFINITELY GREY MAKES ME CRY. ENA SHINONOME YOU ARE SO IMPORTANT TO ME. HER STRUGGLES HIT SO HARD </333 also,,, Shinonome siblings </3 the cards are prettyyyy. they suit the vibe of the event so well. ONCE AGAIN. INFINITELY GREY. beautiful song, the last chorus makes me so emotional. how Ena sounds like she's screaming in desperation throughout...
- Welcome to the Forest of Wolves
i adore Miyajou 1-A <33333 appreciated the VBS friendship in it too!! but mainly KohaMinoShiho being the trio ever. cards? beautiful. i adore fairy tale stuff SO much. poor Kohane accidentally causing a scene all around school, bless her <333
- Exciting Picnic
FAIRY. FAIRY CARD SET. FAIRY CARDS. FAIRY MIZUKI. LITERALLY MY FAVOURITE COSTUME-LESS PERMAMENT CARD. ahem. anywayssssss. Ena <33333 and Shizuku <3333 and Rui <333 MY TOP THREE CHARACTERS?? IN THE SAME EVENT??? what are the chances of it ever happening again </3 oh yes Mizuena... Ena cares so much for Mizukiiiiii they're sooooooo zvsbjdodoskkqkallapalqllaa ALSO ENA DEFENDING SHIZUKU FROM HER PUSHY WEIRD BITCH FANS???? I LOVE ENA SHINONOME. oh and surely you don't think i forgot that it was SHIZURUI'S FIRST MEETING? <3
- Island Panic
- THIS EVENT STORY FELT LIKE A FEVER DREAM. IT WAS SO CHAOTIC AND SILLY AND SO VERY W X S <333 there's so many golden scenes in it. Rui threatening to "sleep the big sleep" if he's made to eat veg. them forming a human pyramid that was nearly ruined by Tsukasa having the audacity to sneeze. Shosuke Otori character development. the only card i really liked was Emu's and Starry Sky Melody isn't one of my favourite songs but the story makes up for it!!
#ace's random thoughts :)#project sekai#pjsk#prsk#pjsekai#proseka#rui kamishiro#saki tenma#shiho hinomori#shizuku hinomori#ena shinonome#kohane azusawa#wonderlands x showtime#wxs#leo/need#l/n
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“Drunk”
90s Axl Rose x reader
You had went out with guys for a fun night but you soon found out the guys held their liquor a lot better than you did you were pretty damn wasted. You started dancing to the loud music blaring and the guys laughed at you and Slash and Duff danced with you a little bit. Your boyfriend Axl stayed super close to you watching over you. “Axl y/n’s fucking plastered” Duff said to him. “I know I need to get her home.” Axl said watching you dance and laughing you looked really happy but everyone knew you were drunk as fuck.
Axls POV:
I was glad y/n was having fun I know she can get in her head and it was nice seeing her let go a little but I was also worried since she was drunk some guy would try to take advantage of her so I kept a close eye on her and made sure she was safe the whole night. I walked up to her and stopped her dancing. “Hi baby you wanna dance with me it’s soooo much fun” she said slurring her words and laughing. “No sugar not right now I think we should get home” I said grabbing her hand. “Awwwww but whyyyyy” she said in a pouty tone. “Because I’m tired and your drunk and I know tomorrow morning is going to be hell for both of us” I said. “I’m not that drunk babe” she said. “Y/n really?” I said. “Ok maybe a little bit” she said laughing “few more minutes?” She asked giving me puppy eyes. “Ok a few more babe then let’s get home ok” I said to her. “Ok” she said hugging me. Duff and I then started talking about stuff and I got distracted by how much time went by and I hadn’t been paying attention to y/n. “Hey where’s y/n?” Duff asked. Shit I couldn’t find her in the crowd. “I don’t know I’ll go find her. I walked around the bar and then I finally found her this tall decent looking guy was trying to talk to her and touch her arm when she pulled it away I saw her mouth from the word “No stop” I knew I had to get over there and get that guy to back the fuck off. I walked over and grabbed y/n “oh my gosh Axl thank goodness” she said immediately falling into my chest and letting me hold her. “Leave my fucking girlfriend alone dick” I said to the guy. “My bad I didn’t know she was with anyone don’t be such a dick jeez ” the guy replied I felt my body tense up as the guy walked away from us I wanted to punch him but as I was starting to walk towards him y/n stopped me “babe don’t” she said and she was right I picked her up bridal style and walked her into the car
“Youre the best” you said to Axl as you drove home. “Thank you babe” Axl said blushing. “I love you” you said “I love you too babe” Axl said trying to focus on the road. “Axl I feel sick” you said. “You’re gonna feel that way for the next few hours baby just try to relax you can get to bed when we get home” Axl said. “That guy was a real dick” you said. “Yeah he was I’m sorry I should’ve been watching you” Axl said. “It’s ok” you said. “I love you” you said again. “I know you do babe you’ve said it a lot this car ride.” Axl said. You laughed “haha you said I know like Han Solo like Star Wars hahaha” you said laughing. “Oh my god” Axl said rolling his eyes at you this was the longest car ride of his life. “You are so drunk y/n” Axl said laughing. “Youre hot I really like your face” you said to Axl “thanks” Axl said laughing at your odd drunk remarks. “Sometimes I think I’m not good enough for you” you said. Axl was caught of guard your remark. “Oh y/n you’re perfect if anything I don’t deserve you your beautiful and kind and have the prettiest eyes and a smile that lights up my life you make everything better you make me a better person I’d be nothing without you” Axl replied only to look over to see you passed out dead asleep in the car.
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Hey there BMT
Happy new year
So...after today's Tae Wlive...I was left feeling a bit confused
Okay to be honest...ever since the solo chapter two era began...I deleted my twitter account and it has been one of the best decisions I made...but in my journey as an Army...Tae has always rubbed me the wrong way and I couldn't really pinpoint what exactly it was about him because when you first come into this fandom it is ot7 kumbaya all the time....so I can't help but realize Tae doesn't like being left out on being in the spotlight...he is someone who seems to know what goes on in the fandom like how most of his solo stans are shippers of him and the maknae...and how said shippers are one of the biggest reasons this fandom is going to shit and how they portray he's supposed soulmate..so...it's how he always comes online when one of the other members is on the spotlight for some reason and he feels the need to name drop the maknae..like today...he comes on for two minutes,comes back and mentions how he is with the maknae and friends but he decided to do the live cause he was bored...plus I found it a bit weird how he didn't mention Jihope being in Paris....considering he likes fashion...something so big and new and exciting for his bandmates,his family,friends...but instead go on and just rally up his psycho cult by adding innuendos with strawberries and "pineapples?"....and I'm just wondering JK couldn't even pop in his head for a second to say hi but then I sit down and remember he likes to lie?troll?be funny? So many narratives to explain away his behaviour....anyways...what was the purpose of all this....you are one of the bangtan fans who is so level headed and I wanted to know if I'm just tripping..
Have an amazing day/night
Alright, I think it's time for a real talk here. I'm not going to mince my words because I don't care what anyone says. I'm no Army, you all know where I stand, so let's fucking go.
This fandom is made of butthurt, two-faced, kumbaya, fruity bangtan-lover people who are rarely able to show some spine because they're too afraid of losing their clout on twitter and their followers on tumblr. They're so programmned to believe that a bunch of seven men are the epitome of perfection, unable to do something even worthy of mentioning any type of criticism because they all live in this fairytale-like world. They are super human, incapable of actions and emotions that govern the daily lives of us, the inferior human race. Well guess what? Believing it doesn't make it real.
We can like nasty people and we can dislike them for the same damn reasons. We can dislike nice people and we can love those good people all the same. And guess what? BTS are people. Tae is one of them. Rm is one of them. Jimin. Yoongi and so on. And we can like BTS, while at the same time, not like some of the things they say or do. It's not the end of the world, the sky won't fall on us. Just as we have complex emotions and reactions towards the people in our own lives and towards our own self. I know I'm seen as some Tae/RM anti. Unfortunately for those people, I can never give them the satisfaction because I don't have a ''hate Tae today and talk shit about him'' on my to-do list every day. And they can say I'm biased and I only care about two people in BTS and I see them as perfect and I get frustrated when someone else talks shit about them. Yeah dude, I do care only about two of them. There ya go. The Earth is still spinning. And you know what? I can dislike stuff about them too.
I don't like Jimin treating the fandom as if they're all kids and even going as far as to cover a damn photo on a hotel wall. It's stupid and it won't help and he's part of the problem. I once thought that Jungkook is going to do something more artistic in the future because I saw the potential after My Time, but for now, all he did was confirm how damn basic he is from an artistic pov. I think he made a wrong decision making that song for the World Cup in Qatar and it shows that money comes first. I don't like RM because he's pretentious as fuck. I don't like Hobi because he's too damn loud and as a fan, I couldn't give a flying fuck about his presence at FW or what brand deals he gets. I think Jin is severely out of touch and money does that to you.I think Tae is insecure for no fucking damn reason, but he is. I think Yoongi can be so damn insensitive sometimes and he doesn't know when to shut up. And, for the sake of inclusivity and fairness, I'll add myself too in this dislike fest (not that I'm some world superstar and I have no fans, but you know what I mean).I am a selfish bitch that tends to ghost people. I have ex-friends that probably hate me and I don't blame them.
What does all this mean? That my opinions are facts? That the aspects I've mentioned reflect someone's entire being? That when I look at Hobi, all I see is an obnoxius loud guy? No. Of course not. He's not just that because none of us are only one thing. Layers, people. As simple as that. And if I or anyone else ends up thinking that Tae is insecure and doesn't like being left out, then so be it. Just as I mentioned all that stuff that I personally don't like, there are many more reasons that still make me enjoy them. They're not horrible people worthy of being burned at the stake. But one bad word and this fandom acts like that's exactly what one means when they are not a fan of a BTS member. Then they jump to call people antis, bitches, cunt whores and every other insult. Because that's certainly nicer that any sort of criticism made towards BTS, but it's an acceptable and desired form of bullying. If this was twitter or perhaps my inbox after this text is posted, some will jump and say that Tae would burn me to keep himself and JK warm. Oh no, I'm about to cry and do my penance and apply 30 lashes on my naked body.
Everything is so absurd and every day when I go on twitter and come here, I'm taking the bad pill on purpose so I can enter this alternative reality. And I accept that, I made my bed. But I'm also not going to be some sheep that parrots whatever this fandom deems acceptable.
So yes, anon. I don't blame you for thinking this. Yes, it does seem to look like a pattern. Why? I don't fucking know. Why doesn't it seem genuine? Because there's a history of lying for no damn reason. No one in their right mind should be upset that he's hanging out with his bandmate (be it in person or playing online games). That's not the problem here. It's just that it has become such a habit of only him doing this one-side whatever the fuck he is trying to do, that I had a bunch of people in my inbox from one-two weeks ago saying that this exact thing will happen at the right moment. And it did. I say we should place some bets next time. It will be more fun.
Why does he suffer from a bad case of mimetic desire? Is it needed? Not from an outsider pov, but I have no idea what insecurities Tae has. Except from that time he told Jungkook during their ITS talk that he uses weverse to get some love from fans because he was indeed insecure at that time. So, that tells you something. Which means, it's not completely out of the realm of all possibilities that some of the stuff he does can be on purpose. I'm glad I'm not a Tae stan or some ot7 army cause I would feel kinda shitty seeing Tae's attitude towards his fans. He laughts at them on Weverse while they believe they're laughing together. Look at how the others are using a live stream to connect with the fans they so much love, while he uses that because he's bored for 5 minutes. What is he? A teenage girl that gets bored after the guys come over? Is this high school? I didn't know he's some 16 year old cause at least his behavior would make more sense. But his fans thinks this is cool behavior, except he's a rebel without any cause that makes threats when the Paradise heir gets dragged in a scandal and other times he's keeping his mouth shut. Anyway......
And if we're dropping names (which doesn't happen just with JK, it's only that he's the main character lately) and if JK was there too, why couldn't he just give a shout and call him to say hi to his beloved fans? No one would think it's weird. We have footage of all the group hanging out together for years everywhere. Either tell him to shut up cause he's about to be live and doesn't want anyone to know, or actually do something? Cause this is what I don't get? Making situations be odd when it's not necessary. Now, it's not confirmed that JK is actually there, it could be just a theory and people having bad hearing and apparently Jungkook can sing like shit sometimes. We don't know.
And I don't want to hear anyone saying he doesn't know his stans and his shippers. First of all, they all do and second of all, he's on damn twitter and there's evidence of that. No, he doesn't have to call out his fans, but why rile them up? But then again, all of them are like that, so there's no escape.
Tae doesn't need to go live and talk about Paris Fashion Week and what his bandmates did. He's not the news so he can cover all the events that are happening. But the timing...like clockwork, every single time. Sometimes it's during and sometimes immediately after. Now he waited a day. Good for him, he's being considerate. If anyone would have to patience to look at the bts archive for the last half of year, I bet the pattern is more easily recognizable.
The point to all this and I'm going to end this post cause it got way too long, celebrities (that includes BTS) are people like everyone else. They put themselves in the public eye which means that everyone else watching them is bound to draw conclusions. Some are favorable and others are not. And saying that Tae seems to want some spotlight and he's not very nice sometimes is not a smear campaign. Whoever believes that, get a life. You have no idea what that means. But this fandom distorts all sense of reality and the actual meaning of words.
People can like Tae for exactly the same reasons I don't. I wish he would be an actual bad boy. That would make him at least interesting. I like shitty people. I like nice people who do shitty things. I like people who are considered persona non grata. So what? So if his fans like Tae for who he is, then absolutely fine. But then I can also say that I don't. That's the basics of all of this.
And one last thought. I can't truly take someone seriously or argue with them in some weird act of defending men. I value myself a bit more than that. So whoever wants to be an Army on a high horse and call me names, you can take them and shove them.
Happy New Year, Anon!
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Thanks @lenorelovesmax for tagging me 🤍
1. How many works do you have on AO3? 2, currently. Well, more like one and a half baked scene that has no context, to be more accurate.
2. What's your total AO3 word count? 194.036 words.
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? I have like the one fic, the other thing has 2 kudos. So... - A Walk in Chiaroscuro (354)
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? Yes, absolutely. It's pretty rare when I don't. I like to tell people that I appreciate their support and comments or to answer questions they might have about the story or the choice I made.
6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? I don't do angsty endings. I'm too old and too jaded by life to appreciate them anymore. I'm at a point in my life where I need to know there's hope and happiness at the end of the line.
7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? I'm guessing there will be some kind of repetition since I've only published Awic... Soooo, it's a Walk in Chiaroscuro! ...but if you want to know about the ones that I keep in my drawer never to see the light of AO3, the happiest ending goes to Let's Write a Love Story (it's a Homestuck fanfic)
8. Do you get hate on fics? No. I'm writing in a mostly dead fandom so far and for kind of a rare pair so, people have been starved of content. They were so nice and sweet to me in the comments.
9. Do you write smut? I wish! I don't have the chops for it but I so wish I could write good smut! Honestly it's something I really want to push myself into exploring. Unfortunately your girl is a bit too vanilla in her taste which makes for poor reading. I don't fear being bad... I fear being boring, you know?
10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've ever written? I've never done that, no. But who knows what future will lead me to write.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? No. I don't have enough reach to be the target of theft.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Nope. And tbh I don't have the patience to translate it myself in my native language.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Could have... but no. There was an attempt at a joined project for Dragon Age but, unfortunately, it didn't work out in the end. I'm not abandoning the idea of writing for Dragon Age but I'll probably go in a very different direction since it would be a solo project.
14. What's your all time favorite ship? I... don't have one... Yeah, I'm not much of a shipper at the core. I mean I did write for Caulscott but I practically ship Max with everybody in LIS so... I was more interested by Nathan's potential as a love interest more than the ship itself. Outside of LIS... I can't think of any ship rn, I'm afraid.
15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will? Tough question. If I abandoned a project I don't consider it a WIP. It's a dropped thing that goes in the reusable idea bin... and if I'm still working on it, I don't go into thinking I won't finish it. So, it's hard to say really. To not leave you with such a vague answer, I'll give you this: the fic I planned to write about the Hidden Object Games series Dark Parable, that never took off and never will (for I have better/much more attractive projects to work on). It's a dropped thing. But now you can see I have weird and obscure taste.
As for original projects: I have a Horror RPG project that probably won't ever see the light of day, called: The Clockmaker. (because I realized I'm shit at pixel art, tragic)
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? Hum... No. I don't mind people doing it but I tried it myself in my pirate epic and, let me tell you, I'm not that good a multilingual as to be witty in more than 2 languages. I found what I wrote cringe af when I read back my text in the editing phase and scrapped it all out.
19. First fandom you wrote for? Homestuck. I started writing fics very late in my life. (I wrote original stuff before that)
20. Favourite fic you've ever written? A Walk in Chiaroscuro. Because it's the only fic I went into unafraid to write what I wanted without thinking about who might read it. And to this day it's the truer work I've put out. Not the most personal by any stretch but the one I indulged in the most. And I'm so proud of it. Flaws and all.
I tag @sourrind and @momochizoey if you feel like doing it. And everybody who'd want to as well, consider yourself tagged, friend!
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what made roxy fall for james?
hello!! tysm for the ask, i've got a very long laundry list for you :)
(and btw im still thinking about the mickames confession, it had me shaking and crying and cheering and sobbing with how masterfully it was done! <3)
as we all know. i have written a lot. and i tend to favor more subtle forms of care here and there throughout a very very long period of time. rames wasn't love at first sight; these two idiots had no idea what their friendship would evolve into, it just kind of... happened over the course of spending time with each other!
for roxy, based on information presented to her by logan about james' dating past in Minnesota when they first meet, she either doesn't recognize his attempts at flirting or brushes them off as 'oh, he's just like this.' pretty standard pretty boy stuff lol. it isn't until she gets her heart broken on the night of the school dance she notices that james actually has stake in her happiness (he did far before this, of course, but this is the first time she truly takes note of it). he stays away from the action to make sure she's okay, gives her time and space to talk through her break up, and eventually, when she asks, he takes her to the dance to ensure the entire night isn't a bust. while she doesn't realize this, this event is the catalyst for her realizing she might like him a bit more than friends :)
her thoughts are more like 'wow! james is actually really sweet, that was nice of him to stand up to my ex, come talk to me and watch me write a new song, and take me to the dance! what a good friend!' girl...
over the next few chapters she finds herself in more situations where james is overtly showing her how much he cares; cleaning her wounds after she's attacked by a cat, comforting her after their first music video disaster, etc, etc, all culminating into big time rush and their assistant being sent home to Minnesota at the end of the first season!
at this point she is still good friends-ing him in her head, but, they are the only two of their friends who actively work to get back to LA and find themselves in a record deal with hawk records. it's now, for the first time, roxy truly takes note of how hard james is willing to work to reach his goals. (not that she didn't at rocque records, but i think solo v band dedication is different) she finds his dedication and drive more than inspiring, and recognizes his efforts to get back to Hollywood... all while insisting to their new record label that he only flies back out there if she comes with him.
to james' credit, this was mainly a career move considering she's written almost all the btr songs, but of course, he has liked her for months at this point and also can't stand the thought of being across the entire country from her. he takes care of her on the flight over (my poor always airsick queen...) comforts her on their first night alone in their new apartment when she confesses that being there without kendall carlos and logan feels wrong
so now, she's able to see his hard work first hand, he isn't having to share his journey with his friends so he's working so much harder than he did in btr, and she takes note of his passion for what he does and finds that incredibly inspiring. but what she finds she likes even more, is his choice to ultimately return to big time rush even when hawk was willing to give him a solo three record deal.
after a steamy little moment in an elevator, she realizes she wishes james would have kissed her, sees him finally reconnect with his friends after days of being away from each other, has a dramatic flashback of all the good times they've had together, and realizes, at long last, she has a crush on him which only grows deeper and deeper until they finally get together
and, even with all this, i also don't want to discount physical attraction, especially with teenagers lol. she thinks he's super hot !
so yeah, lots of little things over a long period of time. mostly that he's actually quite caring when it comes to not only her, but their friends, he's one of the most dedicated people she's ever meet and they both have a unique shared tenacity for reaching their dreams, and she loves the way he makes her feel strong and confident - like she can do anything she sets her mind to!
truly i believe that tasw loses a lot of this explanation in real time because roxy is a little dumb (affectionately), so i've been trying to work on that these last few chapters!
again, tysm for the ask! i love yapping about my little guys sooo much and getting to correct areas of my story i feel i haven't done justice to :)
from the mickames confession, i've got a pretty good idea about james and mickey and their feelings towards each other, and i'm so excited to see the future of their relationship. spoiler-free butttt anything you're looking forward to writing now that they've confessed??!
everyone else - favorite rames moment?? tell me in my inbox for some bts knowledge lol
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Okay decided to do another "rounding up my quick fire thoughts on stuff from Raw having seen it on Hulu" thing (I think I actually got like, most of the matches this time and Sami's segment, but missed whatever thing occurred with Liv and Dom/any other backstage segments that might've happened that didn't make YouTube [though I did see Becky's awesome pre-match promo on YouTube but they cut what came before she started talking], and I think they cut the middle chunk of the Women's Battle Royal out which is boo.)
-Jey and Damian's segment was great, we're gonna eat with that. Also Jey telling Damian to tell Rhea he said hi was for me and I love it.
-JD, my least favorite Judgey Boy tbh, y'all are on the thinnest of ice with the screwups, Damian in charge, and Finn MIA this week. You aren't even on the merch after all these months, man, you're expendable.
-Darn it I don't want DIY drama I want my boy Johnny to thrive. (Their match with Awesome Truth was really good though I'm happy with it)
-Also it was just tag team/faction drama/breakups(?) season Monday, dang with The Imperium stuff.
-Although rip to Vinci but Alpha Academy hurts me more ESPECIALLY CHAD BEING MEAN TO OTIS HE'S YOUR NUMBER ONE GUY!😭 I could excuse suplexing Sami out of his wife's arms in his hometown but I draw the line at insulting your former co-tag champ and your other teammates.
-Also I like their explanation for why Gunther isn't going for the title for a while/focusing on King of the Ring first. It's nice that he's not falling into the old "This Random Guy Was Slightly Mean To Me, Forget Any Title Ambitions I Need To Beat Him Up" trap.
-Drew was on fire as usual but yeah I agree the burger line was a no from me. Did like Sheamus's comeback and their "longtime friends" convo. I'm down to see what The Once And Future Banger Bros Bring Baby.
-And The King of the Ring bracket is looking stacked already. I do also want Xavier to get a proper reign after the last one he deserves it but my heart still belongs to the hypothetical Jimmysweep.
-Not too surprised they focused mainly on Sami's title woes but I do admit I was hoping for a "yeah, Chad sucks, Cathy. Listen, I'm kinda stuck on my boy Kev nearly getting MURDERED three days ago..."
-I found it a little funny Ricochet and Santos matched despite being on opposite teams. (Also oooh Damian you wanna turn face or tweener so bad oooh.)
-I did see Becky's promo on YouTube (love her getting a walk and talk like Sami and Kevin. That's squad goals). Thought it was cool and I loved her encouraging Maxxine. Lord knows that girl needs it between the Chad stuff and Candice's bullying.
-Hulu didn't show me Chelsea getting eliminated but slipping back in because officials didn't see. Heaven forbid women do anything.
-Really thought Liv was gonna take it (her gear was cute too). But I think this might be the last straw before she super officially snaps for realsies.
-I'm definitely in the camp of "Becky doesn't really need another title reign, she's almost done it all and what she hasn't (like Queen or Ms. MITB) she doesn't really need at this point either" (love her though)...
...but I also felt her last two solo title reigns managed to show some love to some of the women who don't usually get shots at the gold (Pre-beating Ronda!Liv and Doudrop!Piper getting shots on PPV against her while Bianca was kept from the title, using the NXT Women's Title like it was Raw's unofficial women's midcard belt), so who knows? Heck, we don't even know if she's gonna have a long reign, so... *Shrug*
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Ranking TMA fears based on how likely I'd willingly become an avatar of them:
15. The Hunt
– Boring boring boring
– Not into the whole chasing thing I get distracted easily
– More abstract fears pls thanks
14. The Corruption
– Very icky and gross, I get too squeamish
– Hate bugs with a passion
– The sicknes and disease and pandemic stuff redeems it slightly
13. The Web
– not really into the whole spiders thing
– I'm a terrible liar and can't pick up on social cues ever
– Annabelle Caine could fuck me, however
12. The Stranger
– The clown aesthetic is really not living up to its nature
– I have bad enough trust issues thank you
– The idea of change makes my autistic brain scream so no
11. The Eye
– I love the aesthetic but the whole idea makes me feel icky
– I like being very ignorant and just vibing
– Eyes creep me out and make me physically uncomfortable so...
10. The Dark
– Pretty basic, I think I'd just vibe quietly
– Can't read fanfiction when there's no light
– It'd get boring very fast and I'd piss off to another entity pretty soon
9. The Flesh
– The only grossish one I kind of like
– I love the blood and goo and stuff
– However touching people might be a problem
8. The Buried
– Honestly seems quite comfy at times
– Slight claustrophobia might be a problem but I can work with that
– Breathing would be nice though so this one drops a little
7. The Spiral
– As much as I love going mental, there are some flaws
– Colours and stuff a bit too overstimulating
– I get stressed about this very easily
6. The Lonely
– Fun for a while but I'd have no one to talk at about hyperfixations
– The clouds are cool and the silence would ve INCREDIBLE
– A bit lacking in the fear department to be honest but still a nice one
5. The Slaughter
– As much as I love mass murder there are more fun ways to do it
– Though killing many people is fun so I could do this well
– Another tiring one but worth it
4. The End
– The absolute nothingness of death? Sign me up
– The vibes are just really bleak and i love them
– Can get a bit samey though
3. The Vast
– Now we're getting somewhere
– Basically the same as the dark but more fun
2. The Desolation
– Hell yeah fire bitch, I love this one
– Burning stuff is so fun and generally destruction is a fun one
– Wouldn't want to be on the recieving end though
The Extinction
– Just takes the best bits of the end, the vast, the desolation and the lonely and makes them so much better
– The crushing hopelessness of losing everything to something out of your control solos
– Apcolypses make me so happy, I just think they're neat
#jayden's thoughts#i just love the extinction sm you guys#tma#magnus archives#the magnus archives#tma fears#the magnus archives fears
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Shiver x Frye but it's when Shiver first met Frye and Big Man, and it's just them being amazed and looking at Frye as if she was the one who made all this surface stuff.
Just general puppy crush and then later on it became a pining crush.
Im so sorry it took forever to get to this ask </3 i hope this is okay since i made you wait so long
The first time Shiver sees Frye its when they transfer to a mainstream school in the splatlands and they're getting used to all the people and their classes, but Frye and Big Man happen to be in a few classes with them
Frye comes up to Shiver and introduces herself and is like "you're the new kid right? You can hang with me if you want, I'm pretty chill if that's your vibe"
Shiver just stares at her- totally caught off guard by this gorgeous inkling coming up to them and wanting to be friends. they're entranced by the bright yellow ink color of Frye's tentacles and her downturned lashes, her pointed ears and gradient fingertips.
They stand there for a moment, blinking, before they answer "yes. yeah, I would like that."
Frye introduces Shiver to Big Man and he's friendly as always, "Nice to meet ya, it's always nice to have another cool person around!"
But Shiver is so focused on Frye all the time, they're happy to be friends with Big Man of course and they become close as they attend school together but Shiver is straight up in love with Frye. They're convinced that she's some kind of goddess in disguise or an angel sent to watch over them because of how beautiful she is, she's so lovely its hard to believe she's a real person.
Usually they're always quick with comebacks and jokes in a conversation, but when Frye is talking to them they short circuit- always stuttering or stumbling over their words and trying to recover fast enough that it doesn't make them look like an idiot.
Frye could ask them to do literally anything and they would say yes before they even knew what they were agreeing to.
"Hey Shiv, I have this math test on friday so I was thinking maybe you could-" and Shiver already interrupts, "Yes I can. When will we be meeting up?"
If they're in the same class with each other they work on all of their assignments together, always pairing up for group projects and such.
When they start getting into music with each other they're always finding a way to do it together, whether that means Shiver is singing and Frye is dancing, or they sing a duet, or one of them provides the harmony for the other while singing solo, and then this leads to them including big man for his musical talents as well.
To most people it would seem like Frye and Shiver are just very close friends but deep down they both were hoping for their friendship to be something more
I love a good mutual pining scenario and these two cephalings are hopelessly in love with each other and neither of them know it
#splatoon#splatoon 3#deep cut#splatoon deep cut#shye#shye splatoon#shiver x frye#shiver splatoon#frye splatoon#big man splatoon#shiver frye and big man#splatoon headcanons#splatoon headcanon#splatoon hcs#splatoon hc#deep cut hc#shye hc
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20 Questions For Fic Writers
thank you for the tag @remyfire - if any of my writer friends want to play too, please feel free, i am shy abt tagging people but ily all
How many works do you have on Ao3?
116
2. What's your total Ao3 word count?
1,045,864
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Currently, MASH. Though I did do a short LotR piece at the beginning of this year.
4. What are your top five fics by kudos?
Oh they're all older ones. The top two are Data/Geordi fics! Then a Kirk/Spock/McCoy, A Garak/Bashir, and an IT Crowd poly fic.
5. Do you respond to comments?
If I understand them (I think I get bot ones sometimes bc they don't make sense). I figure I can never go wrong with thanking someone for their time reading.
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
If this means 'saddest' then it's certainly Hearts On Paper which I found fascinating to write and will still re-read when I need a good cry.
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
I think most of my fics end happily or at least optimistically? I love ending with a big party or wedding or something like that. I have several that way.
8. Do you get hate on fics?
Not in many years. And to be fair I was like 12 and did not know how to spell, but I do remember some of those unkind comments still yeah :(
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
Sometimes. I used to write kink and then had a breakdown over it (I am still proud of what I wrote it just was not a sustainable thing for my OCD, is all) but now I write what I would describe as Fussy Sex. Literally the more compromising and special considerations made from one partner to another makes me so happy. Or solo sex acts, I have enjoyed writing those this year and that's new for me.
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?
I don't think I've ever written one. I get very stuck in the rules of whatever universe I'm working in and it's hard for me to follow two sets of rules at once.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not that I know of.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
Yes, I have, and was greatly honored! It was an older smut fic, quite dark themes, and a reader approached me and asked if they could translate it into Russian and I thought that was so amazingly cool. I'll go find the link if anyone is curious.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Yes! Most recently, The Famous 4077 Dog Tag Party :) we picked pairings randomly and each did a chapter.
14. What’s your all time favorite ship?
I cannot possibly pick just one. Every ship that appeals to me does so at a different time and for a different reason, and the journey they take me on is always emotional and much appreciated in hindsight. My little fictional couples or their families are my family.
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
oughhh presently I'm not sure if I have the right approach to finish Dull Instruments which is a shame because I really want to and I hate to start posting things I won't finish. But it feels awkward to me so I may not do it.
16. What are your writing strengths?
I like my character voices.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
I try to give each piece its own style on a sliding scale of casual-formal but I wish I had more variety in like POV and stuff. Branching out into present tense this year has been nice.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
I do write dialogue in American Sign Language sometimes. Because I am fluent in it. If I'm not fluent in a language I won't write a lot of it, maybe a few words here and there for the POV character to try and pick up, assuming they understand as little of it as I do.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
Truly can't remember if High School Musical or 24 was first. The range, I know.
20. Favorite fic you’ve written?
I don't know if I could choose! Sorry to give a lot of boring wishywashy answers but like. Whatever I'm writing is important to me at the moment I'm writing me, it's helping me get through something that may or may not be clear in the themes, and I am grateful to all of the stories I've written for letting me spend time with them. I've been working on some kind of fic almost daily for going on 15 years now, it's how I experience emotions and all the things in the world I'll never be able to do firsthand. It's how I have conversations I'm too shy to otherwise, it's how I see old friends, it's how I learn more about topics I never did in school. Fic is so dear to me, every word.
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top 5 commissioned project sekai songs?
*rubs hands together* oooh boy. no one is going to agree with this list.
(Also I'm doing top 10 because I talked about my favourite songs in the notes of a post a while back but some stuff has changed. Also I just have a lot of thoughts.)
10. Samsa
They made us wait over 2 years for a Kanade comm to get a 3DMV and it did not disappoint. KAITO's "Zuki" and each of Nightcord's solo line at the end with Kanade reaching out to Mafuyu stick out in particular for me. Samsa is just a really good song. Also the metamorphosis reference is genius, especially since Mafuyu's third comm is 'Bug'.
(Bug is not on this list but it is easily top 20)
9. Stage of Sekai
This was my favourite Leo/Need comm, but we'll get to that later. Honami songs are just really good and I really like Len here as well. Also this song is really fitting for them I think. I especially love that one instrumental bit near the end.
8. Machi
Vivid Old Tale my beloved. An my beloved. This song is just really nice to listen to. It feels nostalgic. (Also now that Light Up The Fire has happened this entire event is painful in the good way). An's alt for this song is also one of the best in game.
7. Momoiro Key
I popped off when a Iyowa comm was announced, and it did not disappoint! The song itself is really good, but the MV is also just beautiful. I tend to just listen to this song on repeat for the MV. Especially that bit in the last chorus when Airi is seen by herself with the morse code background.
6. Niccori^^ Survey Team Theme
It's catchy. Like really catchy. I could give more reasons but also I don't think I need to. I will anyway though. This song just really fits Wonderlands x Showtime I think, especially Emu and her dream to make people smile. Sometimes I get "nikkorikorikorikori koriandaa" stuck in my head. It got stuck while I was writing this actually. Also fun MV.
5. Hitsuji Ga Ippiki
This was Beat Eater a while ago, then I kept listening to this song almost daily. Kick It Up A Notch is an event I am really looking forward to (if that wasn't obvious from the amount of times I Kohane post) and this song is also just incredible. Especially Kohane's rolled r at the end. I really want Kohane and MEIKO alts at some point (because I also really like MEIKO's tuning here.)
4. If
Oh hey look it's the song in my blog header. Who would have thought. I can't really explain why I love this song so much. Haruka's voice is pretty, the backing is really nice, I LOVE the chorus. Also the original version of this song is beautiful as well so listen to that (on Yurrycanon's channel).
3. Kanadetomasusora
Kanade gets two songs on this top 10 just because. This song almost made me cry the first time I fully listened to it. There have only been two other times I've felt that way, with Minori's latest comm (Teammate) and the number 2 spot. It also has this music box feel which really fits considering the event it was made for.
2. Made To Order
The full version came out a month or so ago and it changed me. It's just so beautiful... Ichika's voice is stunning here and Luka fits really well. Not to bring up the MVs again but the sun slowly rising at the end is stunning. I could go on but yeah. I love this song.
1. Kashika
Akito Shinonome. That is all.
But in all serious, December last year is probably when I went from 'I just enjoy this game alot :)' to 'full blown Vivid Bad Squad fan' and this song is partly to blame. It just left me speechless and Find A Way Out is another event I am really looking forward to. I was also just really happy to see MEIKO singing with them more. Also just to shoutout the VAs, Imai Fumiya's high notes are just stunning. Can't wait for the full version soon. Also the MV again. Amazing.
#project sekai#bagel answers#i once spent half a day ranking every comm back when Mr Showtime had just came out#i should probably update that list#sorry i brought MVs up so much i will do it again#honorable mentions i suppose (aka 11-15)#Be The MUSIC! Bug TeraTera Beat Eater and Dream Place
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Okay, finally got around to make an Ask and talking more about 07' (as well as other stuff).
So once again, even though I missed the watch party, I was very happy to see some of ur thoughts on the movie and that you loved it so much!
2nd of all, I am happy you liked a lot of the characters, development, and dynamics!
I would say my favorites in 07' are Leo and Raph (I just love their dynamic and their care and love for each other and the tension between them, and they both have alter egos basically. The Watcher (god damn, his full name is escaping my mind! Shame on me, and I really like the name, alter ego, and how it was even referenced by Raph to Leo in 2012) for Raph and The Ghost of Jungle for Leo (Leo just fricken being in the jungle and messing up bad guys there for years, and basically became a type of boogieman; while Raph became more of a solo vigilante is so interesting) are just so cool and dorky and I love it. I also just love their general development as characters, and their personalities.
Raph, caring, intense, takes things too far sometimes, but loves the people he cares about very much. Leo, cocky (like, so very cocky; I love it. ), calm and cautious, less to mess and play around (His "Come to Daddy" line, him kind of making fun of Raph as the Watchtower? Seriously, the name keeps escaping me, when he didn't know it was him, etc.), tries to be in control, etc. I just love them.
Besides them, I also adore Casey (for basically the reasons you said too, and I just can't help but love Casey most of the time), April (one of my favorite relationships with April and Casey), and Karai (I just like her, okay).
Splinter also had some nice talks with his sons, and Donnie was so hilarious and just so done with everything, and just great everytime we saw though. And Mikey was sweet, funny, and was basically traumatized working as a party entertainer, which is just, so funny, but also sad and relatable in a lot of ways.
So yeah, I love everyone. Would still my favorites are Leo, Raph, Casey, Karai, and April though.
Also, I LOVE the idea of having a kind of "rooftop fight scene" like what happened in '07 between Raph and Leo in the Rogue Leo AU, but reversed, because like, that fight was awesome, and it being reversed in the Rogue Leo AU just makes so much sense. Plus, like u said, it really shows how far Leo is willing to take stuff and how far gone he is, in some regards. The angst man!
Alright, basically done with the this Ask (defin. the '07 part of it); I just want to finish this off by saying, I very much agree to ur answers relating to 2012 Mikey's "age". Leo is the ultimate oldest bro and/or big bro always. Even in Rise when he is a middle child he is still very much a big bro, and in the bad future timeline, basically a parent to Casey Jr.
So yeah, Leo is the ultimate of oldest bros and/or big bros for life (Raph is also a great older bro too).
Also, like you said, I don't think Mikey would make a big deal out of it; being the youngest is kind of a part of him, and he does take advantage of it too. I just think he would use it more as a joke and/or try to pull one over in a situation. If anyone were to use the "I am the oldest card" more seriously (discounting Leo), I honestly think it Raph or Donnie. Lol.
Also, I feel you on the loving TMNT 2012 and it's characters too. 2012 (with Rise) are a couple of the TMNT versions I think about the most (I literally grew up with 2012). And just think about in general. I love them.
I don't as much about ur Shellshocked and Shredder Cat AU, but I have enjoyed ur stuff with them too.
And ur (or just in general) Leo and/or Future Leo and Casey stuff is always appreciated.
Excited for the Rogue Leo and the rest of Of Donnies and Donatellos fics whenever that is; been liking the sneak peaks and stuff u have shared/shown of them so far.
Alright done! Once again, I come baring Long Asks tidings and then take my leave.
I love your long asks so much akdhsjdjk but I’m gonna respond under the cut here so this post doesn’t get longer!
2007 IS SOOOO GOODDDDDD literally for all the reasons you said. Iove Leo but gotta say Raph really stood out to me this time around! This is probably my absolute favorite version of him because it has a surprisingly heartfelt approach to him and his anger issues that I feel like a lot of other versions miss, and it actually completes his arc perfectly to me. I actually started writing out this response and realized I wanted to make a much longer analysis so hey look forward to that lmao because holy shit I have a lot to say.
But besides that YES THIS APRIL AND CASEY ARE EVERYTHING THEY WERE REALLY CUTE!! I really like both of them!! They filled these really sweet older sibling roles with Leo and Raph respectively, and I loved that!! I hate when April and Casey get brushed off or don’t have important roles but I feel like they were perfect here. Casey is a huge dork and made me laugh a lot, April is really cool and was honestly such a delight. Easily some of my favorites!
THE ROOF FIGHT WOULD BE SO GOOD IN THE ROGUE AU I’M FERAL THINKING ABOUT IT!!!! Like I could not have watched 2007 at a better time because I can’t stop thinking about how well that would fit in and how impactful it would be for Leo to go too far this time. Like, level headed, rational Leo!!!!! Idk when I’ll get to that but when I do omfg
AND YES YOU GET IT!! Mikey clearly loves being the youngest in his family, that’s something that can’t be debated! Mikey’s “age” isn’t really a point of conflict or notably worth exploring too far because even if the others started insisting Mikey should consider what that means, he’d definitely turn down the offer and remain as he always was. It’s not like he aged more than a few months, he’s still very much the same Mikey, so it’s just not important- and I love that! It really speaks to the dynamics in the family and how, at the end of the day, they’ve carved out their roles based on who they are rather than the labels they’ve been assigned. Sure, those might’ve shaped them in some ways, but it’s still uniquely them.
And thank you lmao shellshocked and the shredder cat au are fun but I have my passions more set aside for the rogue au and crossovers :) they’re mindless fluff to me in between all the other, more angsty stuff lmao
Thank you for the ask I love hearing your thoughts!!!
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Miles in the NSR world may have A) Plant powers[he is often associated with Sunflowers] or B) The ability to manipulate color and use them like spray paint on enemies [this would tie in nicely to his dad and uncle's past bc they also used to do graffiti together]
Gwen and Hobie may have similar powers that make them able to make their music into tangible things [Gwen kinda does that in the drum solo intro and Spider-punk literally busts in with the guitar attack]
Peter B and Mayday or Miguel are the only people with actual spider-powers since Peter B is closest to the OG Spiderman and Miguel is half spider in the comics
Noir could have color powers too
Peter Porker could have the hammerspace and "survive anything as long as it is funny" powers
Pav with Eve-like reality-bending powers
... sorry for ranting about powers in your ask
Oooh yeah! I think I've seen some sunflower art with Miles in it, didn't know he was associated with them though! But I REALLY like that color/graffiti power set a lot! The ability to go invisible or at the very least camouflage could also be a skill he has. Which makes me think he is more like Eve than like Yinu.
BUT! I also like Pav with Eve's reality bending powers because it makes the scene where he rants about "Chai tea" really funny. Instead of it being a one-off gag for the audience, it is something that actually can happen with Pav's powers. (Thinking this because pretty sure in all the other flashback/lore dumps we get in the movies doesn't have the characters actually interacting as the teller describes who they are. So Pav and Miles interacting during his introduction seems unique, but I could be forgetting stuff).
Gwen and Hobie taking B2J's position or at the very least having the same abilities as Mayday and Zuke seems really plausible. I have this power of like a seismic slam that Quida can do, and honestly I can see Gwen trying to mimic that power and have her own vibration-related power set.
Oh is Miguel like full on half spider? That's cool! Didn't know that! Definitely him being a spider elemental is something I can see happening. Which can also translate to Peter B and Mayday. Peter B and Miguel become friends because of their shared abilities in the same way I think Adder and Cyril became friends with their relation to metal abilities.
Noir having color powers is a possibility, but think of this, how about wind powers? He says wherever he goes the wind follows, and it is shown that is true in the movie with his movie trench coat I'm pretty sure. Like maybe something happened with Miles, or more likely with another person who controls colors, and Noir lost his colors somehow. Miles wants to help him get his colors back but it's been so long that Noir is happy with how he is now. So he stays black and white, and still has wind powers.
Don't know exactly how Peter Porker would work in this AU, but for some reason I see him in a role similar to Ellie but honestly that's just because he is an animal. Hammerspace powers also seems to connect to what Eve has. I think it would be funny if Porker had some kind of time power like Tatiana, but made it look like cartoon logic powers. Like imagine something falling on him, and everyone thinks he got squished, but instead he was just able to speedily basically teleport like Tatiana does and escape it. Then he makes it out to be like a joke that he got flattened or something.
Also don't be sorry for ranting about powers! I love hearing people's headcanons! It is also helping me figure things out if I ever want to actually do anything with a Spiderpeople in NSR AU.
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what i'm listening to 12/5/2022 (song notes under cut)
spot. link//yt link
Laura Les - Haunted: haunted. by laura les.
100 gecs - Hey Big Man: rapidly becoming a contender for my favorite gecs song ever. so many great lines, great sounds, plus the fucking. SNAKE EYES.
100 gecs - Torture Me (feat. Skrillex): i might have preferred the demo of this a tiny bit but this one's still great. the lyrics themselves feel a little bit more adjacent to laura's solo stuff which is cool with me, if you couldn't guess
100 gecs - Runaway: probably my least favorite on the ep but that's not saying much because i'm fuckin w it. the vocals on this are particularly *chefs kiss*
Fontaines D.C. - Jackie Down The Line: i thiiiink this is one of the first tracks to ever appear in more than one WILT... i heard this one on the radio by chance over the summer and it really stuck with me. when wrapped came out, i relistened and have had it on repeat again since. i didn't love this album when it came out, but maybe i'll give it another shot...
Insane Clown Posse - Southwest Voodoo: still on my bullshit, folks. this one has some questionable material but it's a lot of fun and has a surprisingly really great guitar riff. this month i came to the long overdue realization that i have sort of a weird transbutch faggender type attachment to goofy-ass tryhard aggro rap music, so there's gonna be a good deal of that in here
whoTF - Wendy Carlos (feat. Folie, Forget Basement, Fraxiom): i can't really say much about this one other than that frax is a genius. that's not to ignore the others on the track, just that frax is the only one i've had prolonged exposure to
Orgy - Fiction - Dream in Digital: i finally got around to listening to this album after picking it up from the thrift store months ago, and upon hearing this track i realized i had heard it a fair few times before. i lovvve this type of overdramatic cyberpunky industrial shit from the 00s, it's basically what generated my "synthetic solution" tag. good for lain fans btw
CAKE - Never There: heard it on the radio. it's got bitchin horns and a goofy catchy chorus... what more do you want
Deli Girls - It Must Be So nice: this type of digital hardcore or whatever you call it is right up my alley because it's like the perfect midpoint between crazy goth metal shit (love it) and freaky electronic shit (love it). owns. shoutout violet for making good playlists <3
Lil Uzi Vert - Just Wanna Rock: like all the lil uzi material i've enjoyed, this one took a fair few listens to click. it's good though! i'm legally not allowed to say anymore about this song.
White Town - Your Woman: found this from the newest todd video (#toddgirl) and got super interested in hearing more of this guy's stuff. haven't gotten to it yet but this one still goes off
Worthikids - Pinned My Dreams On A Shooting Star: i'll be real when i heard this in the new episode, i thought it was going to be a lot more minor key and edgy. little bit disappointed, frankly, BUT. still a good jam. bubger
Harry Styles - Late Night Talking: i'm as surprised as you are. these top 40 rankings are doing things to me, man. this week's coming later today btw. but yeah this was a way better single than as it was, it's got really nice harmonies and speaks to the theme of change much better. i'm legally not allowed to say anymore about this song.
House Of Pain - Top O' The Morning to Ya: remember what i said about shitty tryhard aggro rap? yeah
Fuel - Hemorrhage (In My Hands): same kinda thing as the orgy song where i realized i had heard this a million times, except this time i didn't buy the album i just heard this on the radio. i do love my post grunge!
Kris Kross - I Missed The Bus: another todd find, he used this as the interstitial in his 90's bus ranking video. it's just so fucking funny to me, these kids having to act all tough and cool while rapping a chorus that just goes "i missed the bus" again and again lmaooo
Mudvayne - Happy?: mudvayne had some genuinely good songs but also mostly chad gray's voice is just really funny because of how shitty it is. like bro you can barely scream please stop trying to clean sing. except don't because again. very funny
Eminem - Without Me: LOOK. i'm allowed to enjoy a few eminem songs, both because of the aforementioned weird gender crisis i've been having for the past month or possibly several years AND because some of them are not that bad!! the hook on this one is really good!! fuck you! still, the amusement i get from ripping on eminem will always always always outweigh any level of genuine enjoyment i might be able to get from his music
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