#like yinyang of each other

[potatobugz]

redraw of this ★

[razzle-zazzle]

hmmm

might rework the betrothal au a lil bit

[ambeauty]

Random Thoughts about Sydney and Carmen

The more I thought about it, the more Sydney and Carmen represent Yin Yang to me. In almost every sense, they are complete opposites that have to work together in order to find harmony. Here are some quotes on what yinyang is and how Sydney and Carmen fit into that dynamic:

This drawing illustrates the exact binary of their characters. Male|Female, Black|White, Quiet|Loud, no Mother|No Father. Secondary Education| Self Taught. I can keep going with the ways their characters are designed as polar opposites. The success of The Bear depends upon finding out how to balance their polarities and use them as advantages. The restaurant and themselves need each other to mature and survive. They are attracted to each other’s differences but what they are striving for requires them to resolve their struggle for dominance.

“…yinyang as a process of harmonization ensuring a constant, dynamic balance of all things. As the Zhuangzi (Chuang-tzu) claims, “Yin in its highest form is freezing while yang in its highest form is boiling. The chilliness comes from heaven while the warmness comes from the earth. The interaction of these two establishes he (harmony), so it gives birth to things. Perhaps this is the law of everything yet there is no form being seen”

Carmy is literally frozen. Although he represents a lot of elements of heat in s1, they have almost swapped at the point in time we are in now. She will metaphorically burn it all down by leaving. Carmy has the power to cleanse all of them by finding closure on his path and allowing himself to see a different future. His anger boils over like hot water, while her simmers beneath the surface like lava. Her quiet inability to speak up for herself will lead to destruction. But if they work together, communicate, they will find harmony and continue to give life (birth) beautiful things. As evidence by the education they have already passed on to their staff. As focused on by Chris in 307: Legacy.

“The philosophical principle of Yin and Yang evolved into the idea that all things in the universe exist as inseparable and contradictory opposites. Or pairs of equal opposites that attract and complement each other. Less like “opposing forces”, and more “complimentary forces”.

Think ‘balance’, not conflict.

In short, the yin-yang has come to symbolically represent the constant path of uniting opposites and the pursuit of seeking balance in life.”

I firmly believe that they need each other to find perfect harmony. Now that they are in each other’s lives nothing they do on their own will ever feel complete. They have to find the balance within their mirrored paths to create the harmony they are looking for creatively, professionally, and emotionally within each other.

Happy SydCarmy Week! Day 3: Vibrant Collaboration

Thank you to my pookie for listening to me rant about this @sydneys-adamu 😘

The gifs do not belong to me

[weirdmageddon]

ok prev this is a huge part of why i love homestuck

aside from hussie’s use of platonic forms to construct the world which i think overlays everything basically

It's an approach that resonates with the rest of Homestuck's governing principles involving simple platonic concepts giving rise to greater complexity and chaos

there’s so much thematics and symbolism and symmetry that it’s so like, logically aesthetically pleasing to my brain. you could make a college course on homestuck’s integration of archetypes and typological symmetry (card suits, chess, DNA nucleotides ACGT, western zodiac, alchemy/elementals, the god tier classes and roles). lots of stuff that comes in pairs and even numbers, products of 2 so they can always be divided into halves. everything is symmetrical i swear the structure is so satisfying. it’s quite frankly impossible list it all since some of them encompass other elements within themselves, its like a fucking fractal of duality and 90 degree angle quartets of symbols

is there a name for this kind of symbolic symmetrical dichotomy elements….but not even “dichotomy” is necessarily correct since it often comes in a tetrachotomy too. twos, fours, eights, twelves, sixteens. and always mathematically relating to each other like folding over paper more than once and counting the folds on a single sheet of paper. folded in half once there’s two sides of the single paper. folded again the other way there’s four quarters of a single paper made by two halves (the halving folds themselves split the paper into two sides and there’s two of those folds). though that’s exponential the metaphor still applies

it’s definitely both mathematical and philosophical in nature. four seasons, four temperaments, four classical elements. its present in a lot of philosophy most prominently the yinyang concept and some jungian stuff has it too. like socionics model A also does that logically symmetrical structural relationships shit that i love. its sooo my jam i love you logical patterns and relationships i love you symbolism

idk what im saying or if there’s a term for this im just rambling. if you know what im saying or know of a term for this regarding what im getting at please tell me. im just spitballin whats im rotating in my mind but cant find the words for. fuck i need to talk about this. im not even really trying to make a point about these im just pointing them out

[rinbylin]

li xiangyi, yin, and femininity

we all know that li xiangyi is a character of fractured identities. and li lianhua is an unreliable narrator to his own story. these make him not the most straightforward character to study. but I've believed in treating li lianhua as a part of li xiangyi, rather than separates. and there must be a common thread that ties all of him together. thus, I offer what I have found to be the most useful lens to use to view him as a cohesive whole, regardless as li xiangyi, li lianhua, or any other identity he may reinvent into: his 阴 yin qualities. (yin of yinyang)

this framework suggested by the drama's text itself has helped clarify to me his strengths, weaknesses, motivations, and struggles. by identifying this constant, too, makes it so much easier talking about what has changed in him.

[to the, hopefully growing, boli lhl hivemind @markiafc @ananeiah]

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there are some notes on the concept of yinyang and chinese conceptualisation of gender I have to preface with.

[disclaimer: of course, I'm not even trying to cover a tip of what experts have extensively studied and debated in a depth it deserves. all I'm doing is try to parse the broad, fundamental ideas that are needed to explain my blorbos through my own spotty brain filter. so there bound to be nuances I've overlooked or some degree of my own interpretation. pretentious but needs to be done.]

阴 yin and 阳 yang are concepts characterised by passiveness, darkness, gentleness, femininity etc, and proactivity, light, toughness, masculinity etc respectively. a very key and handy concept to have in mind is their relationship to each other - which I'll not attempt at explaining better than literal scholars have:

Yin and yang exist only in relation to one another internally as the way warmth-coldness only exist relative to one another. Furthermore, when using yin-yang as an organizational schema, achieving balancing harmony is always the goal, not domination nor subordination of one to the other. [x]

while yin and yang can be symbols of femininity and masculinity, it doesn't mean all female are yin and all male are yang. it's certainly not a strict 1-to-1 equation. the concept of gender in chinese context is more social than biological. this suggests room for fluidity, and shaping of identities, often through social rituals as one journeys through life. it also means that there can be femininity in the masculine, and vice versa - in fact, that's only healthy because you need a good balance of the two worlds. no one part is better than the other. if you think of the two components as relative to each other, they are always interacting and affecting each other, rather than being strict and inert binaries. simply put, it needs to be kept in mind that there are greater nuances in applying yin and yang to the definitions of gender, and to avoid at all cost a simplification of this framework into a binary.

sure, the show has implied that lxy's powers and energy are yin-coded. but femininity is only one of the multiple attributes of yin. so how are we extending lxy's yin to femininity specifically? it's in the text that substantiates and qualifies lxy as feminine. dead women being used as proxies to his character. being literally dressed as a woman in order to put himself into their shoes and feel what they've felt. adopting a name that happens to be very, very feminine - 莲花 lianhua (lit. lotus flower) (it must be caveated that chinese names are NOT gendered. but there are just some names that are more feminine than others.) him coming to lead a life revolving around traditionally feminine, domestic things as li lianhua. him having interactions with the women around him like he's in his own element - no pressure and tension at all, unlike with all the other men.

as such, I'm more willing to use yin and femininity interchangeably in discussing lxy (while it's not necessarily applicable to every point that will be mentioned albeit there being some degree of implied association). and it's for the sake of elucidating what I feel is an intention or very plausible reading of the canon text in parsing feminine experiences in lxy's character. and thus, his queerness.

one last note is that taoism is going be mentioned quite a bit as well because of how much it as a philosophy honours the yin quality. its key tenets include valuing passiveness and inaction as a form of action, and submitting to the nature of things. and we will see how those come up in lxy's life too. (though I'm not gonna attempt to deep dive into it here beyond broad strokes of it.)

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a huge part of li xiangyi's yin actually manifests in him being a passive person. this applies not just to li lianhua, but also li xiangyi. I know. ok wait hear me out. the idea of yinyang is after all components that can change and are relational to each other: thus, there were points in li xiangyi's life when he was less passive than other points, but they ultimately don't match up to the degree of aggression displayed by other men around him. so relative to their display of proactivity and aggression, he can be considered as passive. the best example is that of shan gudao proposing to launch an offensive on jinyuan alliance, while lxy - as much as he was arrogant about it - was standing his ground on not taking action in favour of peace.

it has already showed up in his childhood as well. he wasn't a particularly competitive child: 从来都没有谁要和你争 nobody has ever thought of competing with you over anything, he told sgd as he recalled of their times growing up. it was in fact sgd who was desperate to control and override lxy's presence. baby lxy did not hesitate at all over giving up on winning in favour of protecting his only rare few close relationships left in the world (given how hard-earned relationships are when they're non-familial !!!!). as much as I resent the one-dimensional writing of sgd, he has served as a very strong marker to highlight on lxy's yin.

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I've harped on it several times before but this is the time I finally get to explain it proper: my own theory is that li xiangyi became an unparalleled swordsmaster because of his yin/feminine quality, not in spite of it. an interesting point that had been out in the open unclaimed until it was brought up in our friend group is that, li xiangyi does not actually fit anybody's conventional image of a 武林盟主 wulin mengzhu (ie. ruler of wulin). it would most likely have been some burly, muscular, ultra-masculine dude. even if they don't look like the demonic monk, it should be someone more like di feisheng. but. it's li xiangyi, the boyish, delicate-looking kid, who came to the top. (no wonder people - mostly men - love or love to bully hate him like weak men hate powerful women??)

"why didn't they cast someone who looks more like a wulin mengzhu (read: traditionally manly)?" no, no that's precisely the point. nobody said wulin mengzhu have to look manly. and also who is to define the manliness required to be in a place of authority? (or in my other meta, we would ask, who is to define anybody gets to have the authority over anyone else at all?)

by taoist ideal, gentleness is the most refined form of strength. li xiangyi has been haunting and distracting me in my chinese calligraphy practices lately because I'm thinking about how this must be the closest to what it felt like lxy becoming the best swordsman in jianghu. (so pretentiously brainrotten of me, I know, BUT IT'S REAL and I'm suffering.) mastering a chinese art is essentially about mastering a delicate balance between force and gentleness; being able to draw force from softness 柔中带刚 and an ability to maintain this balance. a beginner will instinctively hold a brush for the first time with brute, unrefined force. some fairly reputable contemporary calligraphers, according to my teacher, can be seen as being either too soft or too forceful - but are still able to pass off as good enough. it's then, the master of masters who will have the sophistication of a firm yet flexible control of the brush with the appropriate use of gentleness/laxness that produces a harmony of strokes. this idea extends to any other sort of chinese craft or practice including traditional chinese medicine, and I believe, swordsmanship too. I'm taking a fucking leap of faith here to say this because I practise NO sort of (chinese) martial arts, I must caveat. (someone who does may want to say something...) but theoretically that should be how it works.

it is not for no rhyme or reason, or *handwaves* that lxy emerged to the top AND is almost undefeatable. among a competitive, forceful (ie. yang) wulin, li xiangyi stood out with a power and energy defined by yin (ie. gentleness and stability) that led him to create his signature 扬州慢 yangzhouman. it is characterised by 慢 slowness (my calligraphy teacher says to us all the time to take it slow), and also described by dfs as 中正绵长 - which I would best describe by painting a picture of a steady and stable stream. these precisely speak of the essence of a mastery of gentleness as strength to me.

conversely, dfs's way in mastering power is very largely premised on taking action because he literally had no other choice in the environment he grew up in. both of them develop in opposite ways. it was the case of gentleness for lxy clearly because he grew up in a safe, nurturing environment that had allowed him to be slow and steady at his own pace, drawing on his natural gifts.

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now top of the wulin world at 17, li xiangyi founds sigu sect. li xiangyi, the boy before becoming menzhu and li xiangyi the leader of sigu sect are not the same.

how then did a (relatively) passive boy like lxy end up founding sigu sect. this lxy is the one who was fostered into competition - though not in an abusive, twisted way. in fact he was raised in a rather taoist way by his shifu: to be honest with yourself and respect your opponent. so he honoured whatever powers he had been bestowed with by nature. he gives into it. even so, at another level, I just have a sense that shifu and shiniang's competitive marital spat had an insidious effect on the boys...though the detrimental effect was more on sgd than lxy. baby lxy feels like a sweet-natured kid who was just in his own zone, you know - some (aka sgd) would say, too much of him even, to have not realised what was wrong at all with his shixiong for years.

that's not all of course. I've always gotten the vibes that his attitude behind forming sigu sect felt more like, this is what all the good men of jianghu do and I will have to do it now especially that I'm the best. it didn't feel particularly personal to me, but rather what would have been expected of him by the social climate of wulin jianghu (eg. lxy saying to 光耀师门 bring honour to his teacher). it's definitely not an expectation from his shifu, who explicitly told him that he was never expected to become a noble figure of any sort, but just to be alive and contented. as concluded by the man himself as li lianhua: "有些人入了江湖是为了立心，而有的人入江湖为的是立命。我却不知道自己真正想要的是什么。some people enter jianghu for the cultivation of the mind, others for a cultivation of a meaningful life. but I never knew what I truly wanted." he was ultimately, unwittingly a passive player in his own story of becoming the great sigu sect leader.

(at this point, as a side note, I do wonder if there were any other similar sects or alliances that function the same as sigu sect that came before it. because I'm damn well sure there must be something, as likely as there must have been generations of wulin legends who came before lxy. but of course, this is not what the story is concerned with at all and I'm ok with that.)

it's crucial to point out that, even despite this being the phase of his yang in the display of taking action and enacting firmness, lxy had still done sigu sect with the sole purpose and manner of upkeeping peace and order (in the way of the pro-universal love, anti-aggression mohist 侠 xia leader of the people). he's still very characterised by yin in my books, especially when vis-à-vis to sgd.

a li xiangyi full of himself and made himself too useful to the people was only bound for a great asteroidal fall, in the concept of 物极必反 - or in taoist lexicon 反者道之动 (ie. anything that has reached its limit will only start developing in the opposite direction). if you think you're above all, you can only go down.

this manifests during the next time he took action - and it was one so forceful that it overpowered even his opponent, dfs who ended up being the passive, receiving party in this case - was in initiating the battle at donghai 10 years ago... and gee oh boy. it didn't end well - for both of them, but even more so for lxy. (dfs was like 'tis but a scratch (shrugs)' as compared to him being ripped off his tendons by jiao liqiao like nezha did to the dragon prince. truth is he had to go into a 10-year healing retreat served by his entourage. :p) ok, I digress.

xiao zijin was quick to attribute sigu sect's fall to lxy's arrogance - in turn setting the stage for lxy's 10 years of self-hatred and the framing of lxy as a villain? irresponsible figure? by jianghu. (god forbid girls do anything! ok for legal reasons, this a joke.) lxy lost his mind in ways I believe he never had in his life there and then upon seeing his shixiong dead. so, you could say he led the jianghu world to ruins out of love (using this term loosely). but it feels inaccurate to say it's due to arrogance. he did not do that out of self-importance or ego, especially when the revenge for sgd was a collective decision made by sigu sect as we know from the flashback. so when llh pinned all fault on himself for being arrogant in the past, it is with caution to take his words because that's the unreliable narrator in him speaking.

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anyway, it's precisely li xiangyi that is capable of bouncing back from such a fatal crisis, equipped with his yin and a mastery that gave him the power of flexibility.

it's extremely vital to re-establish that literally the only thing that was keeping li xiangyi alive, physically, as li lianhua is yangzhouman. (monk wuliao literally said that to lxy even though he did facilitate in saving him.) it's the yangzhouman that was drawn from lxy's mastery of yin. without yangzhouman, li xiangyi would not even have the chance to become li lianhua and undergo any needed process of transformation. without li xiangyi, there would have been no yangzhouman. no li xiangyi, no li lianhua, get it?

the point is not to deny the change li xiangyi wants to make and has made. but to acknowledge that change isn't about complete erasure and destruction. something from you survives. something in you had kept you alive to have you come so far, regardless of all the bad bits that you want to denounce of. you've always been worth it.

bringing back the thing about his new name: the distinction must be made that he did not pick it because it was feminine but it just so happened a feminine name had resonated with him. (read: he didn't necessarily identify as a woman but identified with femininity. at least within the parameters of canon text.)

he also made an interesting choice to retain his surname for someone who was desperate to sever ties from his past. hmm. or maybe he wasn't that desperate? when li lianhua says li xiangyi is dead, I believe it meant that li xiangyi the sigumen menzhu is dead rather than li xiangyi as an entirety. li lianhua is a returning to the path lxy could have gone if he did not establish sigu sect, the path that shifu wanted him to take. when he walked to the doors of sigu sect in the aftermath, nothing was actually stopping him from going back (people were still around and alive, instead of all dead people, you know)... except for himself. taking that action would have been too much for him. so he went with the flow of life giving him a chance at rebirth and walked away. there, inaction as a form of action.

zhan yunfei and qiao wanmian have said to li lianhua, oh that doesn't sound like li xiangyi at all. but has it been considered that, maybe it was sigu sect's lxy who wasn't the real lxy? sigu sect lxy was one big performance of the values of masculinity and heteronormativity that llh had came to an awareness of, and eventually struggle with again and resist against in the final year of his life. there had only been some glimpses of his true nature allowed (validated by fang duobing talking about lxy at his altar).

imho, most flashbacks of lxy during that period felt impersonal and more like a template of a hero expected to marry his girl at 18. going through all the motions and steps of a normative life even before he was old enough to grasp and explore his own identity and what it meant in the world. no wonder he denounced so much of what he had done as lxy including liking girls. walking away then also meant a walk away from those duties and expectations. li lianhua is li xiangyi liberated from masculine duties and heteronormative performance.

in doing that, he had the opportunity for the first time in his life to explore what he truly wanted, at least within the parameters of what he could afford to do at that point. he could go on to build a domestic, feminine life within the space of jianghu (as I've established here). it's a kind of feminine lifestyle that doesn't quite exist in mainstream society - being a woman there meant to stay put in a domestic space without much room to move socially. nor did it exist in wulin jianghu because even the women there like shi-guniang and jlq were expected to be masculine, aggressive, competitive. so building a mobile home in the space of jianghu is his way of defining the life he wants and can have. li lianhua is the extension of femininity in li xiangyi - and one that can be free.

it's also worth talking about in my opinion what is one of the most important and a favourite dihua moment: when dfs said to lxy that his greatest weakness was to like being a hero. and a swordsman should be without weaknesses. I'm forever wrapped up in how many layers this can be read in. was he mad at lxy for liking to be a hero or having weaknesses, or both? if the former, it was dfs criticising, based on lxy's public reputation, lxy's oversized illusions about being a hero - a figure of masculinity with an unrealistic sense to uphold noble goals eg. saving the world etc. that is actually perfectly logical coming from dfs, the straightforward, no-nonsense, morally neutral guy with no illusions about heroism (in this case, he feels more like a yin). but at the same time, we should understand that lxy's motivations behind the donghai battle are more personal than noble. if any, it was actually the opposite of noble - it was like he was acting out of the role of a caretaker of his family, and at a cost of the peace and order of jianghu he was set on guarding(!!) dfs also knew that lxy was there just for his shixiong. and so, dfs, who happens to be the epitome of yang, can be read as a symbol of masculinity disapproving of lxy for being sentimental and emotional; for having the "feminine" desires to simply want to defend his family (not saying those are exclusively feminine traits but they have been conventionally associated as feminine). I think both layers of reading are correct and should work together to contribute to the complexity of their characters. (we can see how it contributes to lxy and dfs being the perfect yinyang halves to each other, which I will come back to briefly touch on later.)

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for 10 years he lived a life of seclusion and staying-in-his-own-lane a taoist would be proud of. he knew he was dying and has always been ok with dying, as he claimed. but did he want to die? to think of it, it was the opposite. because in those 10 years when he could have 100% just taken action to take his own life, he didn't. in fact, he lived on and took care of himself in the way shifu wanted him to. he had simply preferred letting nature run its course. if bicha didn't take him, he wasn't gonna do anything. but if he died one day very soon, he would be ok with it too. sure, he was maybe banking on a lead to sgd's whereabouts to appear during his last years alive but that clearly wasn't the only thing on his mind for NINE years because he didn't actively go out seeking for that either. this is basically him telling dfs that he would just lie in the sun and wait for the sweet release of death, if dfs were to force him to fight. not even the mortal threat from dfs was enough to move him into action of fighting back or killing himself.

time and again, lxy as llh was dragged into fdb's cases but not only that, he also maintained an impersonal distance with them. it's starkly different from the usual (wuxia) hero archetypes (for eg. fdb) who would be more impassioned and personally invested in the plight of the victims- or unlike most seemingly aloof protagonists who would somehow grow emotionally invested over time. one of the many things I love about llh is that he never tries a second time to persuade people out of their decisions he finds unwise (eg. him just wanting to move on in response to the girls in 女宅 insisting on staying behind with their slave master at first.) he will not interfere in other people's choices made in their own lives. it's not his business. he didn't even want to be there, to be honest.

however as the story progresses, more and more people - especially men, his past, and the leads to the truth came back to demand and taunt him into doing something. they vary from well-meaning people without any harm intended such as fdb intruding upon his private space completely uninvited and qwm wanting him back; to dfs merely seeking him as a mean to an end initially (eg. I only need him to live long enough to have one last fight); and finally, on the other end of the spectrum, outright aggressive and hostile people like sgd and xzj who wanted him to die. under all this pressure, he tried his best to deflect, but he does waver especially when it comes to matters concerning the people he cares about aka his obsession wish of 10 years of looking for sgd's remains that had lied low until fdb entered his life, and then later on taking revenge for his shifu.

looking for sgd became his final bid at taking action. he was operating on a slim chance of getting some emotional closure from finding out his shixiong is dead for real, yes. what a good plan. but objectively unnecessary. or surprise! uhhh...finding out his beloved shixiong is actually alive and would strangle him for one corn chip? AND OH NO IT GOT WORSE- uncovering a devastating truth about his shifu's death that he could have totally gone on with life fine without knowing if he had continued not caring.

but it is sometimes just impossible not to care - it is only human to care. and he is human, not an icon in the image of a hero. so he took a chance, once more, and it killed him in unprecedented ways. it's donghai all over again. things in life don't go as planned. you fuck around and it fucks you back. finding out the truth behind his shifu's death and his family background from the past did nothing for him as li lianhua living in the present.

it's no wonder that this lxy decisively relinquishes the desire to take action in the end. he goes back to letting nature run its course. and this time, stands firmly to it despite everyone begging him otherwise. wangchuan flower could only give him a recovery (or survival?) rate of 30%. there's a 70% chance of failure and even in the 30% he was not sure what he was to become. in comparison, dfs took a 10% chance game of survival in a heartbeat, and it pushed him to new heights. that's how they differ: he thrives by taking risks and action while lxy the other way round. so, something like that has happened before and he wants none of it again.

-

he leaves lotus tower, only taking his horse and a sack - relinquishing almost every other material belonging he had - and sets off on a journey. before xzj interrupted...where to was he going?? I wonder. we don't know for sure, I think? and are we allowed to know? that makes the scene he had with xzj an understated inflection point in the very last part of his journey. yes, he was already on his way to...maybe die? but not necessarily. you don't have to travel distances with your belongings for that, right? or speak to dfs personally about not wanting to fight? (borrowing one of @ananeiah's takes.) regardless, he was definitely leaving behind jianghu - not only wulin jianghu (he already did that 10 years ago), but also the jianghu space he had carved out in the last 10 years.

what sparked the decision to jump off the cliff in him was dfs's words from the night of their wedding 10th donghai anniversary: 横扫天下容易，断相夷太剑不易 conquering the world is easy, breaking xiangyi sword is not. in the original context, dfs was talking about defeating lxy being harder than conquering the world. but when it came to this scene, it was to lxy about forsaking the very last worldly possessions he had after already giving up on lotus tower and hulijing (including releasing his horse), especially his only connection left to swordsman lxy.

perhaps it had dawned on him that, wanting things at all was bad for him. in the last 10 years, he lived a life of seclusion, wanting very little. but he had still wanted things. there were still things he couldn't let go of that had led him to this state. despite having lived on an identity inspired by a buddhist teaching for 10 years, maybe it was only at this point that he was finally the closest to reaching an understanding of it. (I wish I was knowledgeable enough right now to dive into the possible buddhist reading here but alas. I'll leave it to our resident expert @markiafc)

it doesn't quite matter in the end where he was going after all. what mattered was that he literally went where the water took him and we're not supposed to know where it ends. I'm not seeing this in a bad and pessimistic way though. I think the relief in all this is that he had tried his best to within his abilities. also it's a form of enlightenment in relinquishing a desire, an obsession, a need to take any more action in order to live well. thus his ending felt to me relatively tender, empowering, and kind - albeit bittersweet and heartaching - than other possible kinds of ending, in a story where it was very possible for him to have died under the knives of his opponents or bicha at any moment, outside of his control.

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if you've come so far in this post, congratulations! but also a reveal is that... you're not immune to the dihua propaganda threaded throughout this post. :P

as mentioned, other men like sgd and xzj in lxy's life were incredibly hostile to him. their yang nature overwhelmingly powers his yin. but dfs is different. dfs is the yang counterpart that fits perfectly to his yin.

dfs's yang is one that contains yin, that mirrors lxy's balance of yang in yin. it was suggested in text they are yinyang-coded meant to complement each other, given that whenever wangchuan flower's yin vs yang properties were discussed, the two men were always spoken about in the same breath. more importantly, as with the above few analyses of dfs's words playing a big role in shaping of lxy's choices with multiple meanings - as well as their day-to-day interactions - we can see that they constantly play off each other.

dfs's yang energy has been used to help lxy prolong his life (though not saving him entirely), while lxy has used his yin energy to save dfs and subsequently helped him attain his breakthrough. dfs has also helped lxy in his breakthrough of yin but not in the same way as dfs's cultivation of his combative powers, and rather, it's for lxy an understanding of his own path to take in life - a cultivation of the mind (both times 10 years before and after). given how significant dfs is in the shaping of lxy's realisation of the yin path - alike his shifu has, it's no wonder that they were the only two people lxy had imagined in his last sword dance of a farewell to jianghu.

with each of them coming together to form the perfect yin-yang model, they're a harmony of yin and yang representing the cosmos. what I also love is that they didn't start out as a perfect fit, but only towards the end of the story was the harmonisation completed, which makes sense for two components that are always in a flux influencing each other. the fact that they were number 1 and 2 of wulin, and being the only ones capable of understanding each other in a level nobody else could... it all reinforces the cosmic sense of their relationship. they're the halves to a whole, fitting in a specific way nobody else can.

(I mean. technically this is going into the space of extrapolation based on a tangential interpretation of canon text, so do take it with a pinch of salt. but of course this pinch of salt can do wonders for a shipper's feast... :P and this certainly could have been a meta of its own expanding on dfs's side of the analysis, but this is it for now in this context.)

-

to think of it, li xiangyi has actually died more than that one time that turned him into li lianhua. first was a death of him as a nanyin royalty - I resent having to bring up nanyin like it should hold any weight to the narrative as far as I'm concerned, but the point being that he had a completely different (familial-based) life before that still stands. then he had a rebirth as li xiangyi, disciple and swordsman to his shifu and shiniang, and later died again when li xiangyi the sigu sect leader took over. lxy the sigu sect leader died at sea in the battle 10 years ago and came back as li lianhua. (just like nezha, died after battling at east sea and rebirthed from the lotus) li lianhua then dies by the end of the drama.

there can be a myriad of interpretations as to what exactly happened to him, including the possibility that he's still alive. regardless, we can agree that li lianhua as an identity has ran its course, and he had to evolve again. but into what form?

in the line of thought of yin and femininity, and how his transformation has been in an increasing degree of presentation of femininity - even way back when I was watching the show, I had the idea of him living socially as a woman post-li lianhua. I don't know what he would be realistically doing or what could be practical for him in such an identity. but conceptually it was sensible and compelling to me before diving deeper into the details. (I have more elaboration to do on this that I won't be talking about here publicly but it is in the same strain of idea as this other comparative meta I wrote.)

I think the next possible identity lxy can assume - alive in the material realm or not - is one that will be beyond a material being. a nameless entity. once you've gone through the phases of life - from not knowing to knowing, and perfecting knowledge, then to the surpassing of knowledge - you surpass all worldly existence, and become one with the cosmos.

I end this off with an excerpt from Tao Te Ching's Chapter 41 (I'm not pretending to have read the whole book ok but I couldn't resist including this):

明道若昧，进道若退，夷道若纇 [...] 道隐无名 The bright path seems dim; Going forward seems like retreat; The easy way seems hard [...] The Tao is hidden and without name. (x)

the character translated into "easy" is the same 夷 yi of li xiangyi's name. somehow this seems to encapsulate the journey of his life: one that seems blessed and smooth-sailing but ending up to be rocky and turbulent. but at the end of the day, after all that he had been through, he will become hidden and without name.

[chirpycloudyrobin]

"Saving one person is child's play. Saving the world is as hard as reaching the Heavens."

Do I press forward? Or run away?

"... back when he made the decision, he fully understood the situations that he had to face."

...although he thought that his heart was like a stone, in the end, he was still human, not some emotionless grass or plant.

In which I make connections between MDZS' Wei Wuxian and Honkai Star Rail's Jiaoqiu solely because both are pretty much my blorbos. I'll start off with the easiest connections and I will inevitably end up making the longest of reaches so come along for the ride ! :D

Contains spoilers ahead for both Mo Dao Zu Shi and Honkai Star Rail ~ Be warned :3

The quickest and easiest connections are the most surface-level ones. Both characters are attributed with the colour red (or shades/variants of), foxes, and spice.

Jiaoqiu is a Foxian, an in-game humanoid species with vulpine (fox-like) features, Wei Wuxian has been connected with foxes by the fanbase (see: popular fox!Xian and dragon!Ji type fanfics)

Both characters favour spicy dishes, so spicy that no other person could withstand their spice tolerance. For Wei Wuxian, canonically it's because he grew up eating spicy dishes. For Jiaoqiu, trauma numbed his sense of taste and only the spiciest dishes could make him feel alive for the first time (see: Jiaoqiu Character Story III)

Jiaoqiu's in-game abilities' aesthetic is also based heavily around the Yuanyang Hotpot, where the hotpot resembles the yinyang symbol and one of the broths involved is a spicy broth.

Their character designs feature the colour red as a significant colour. (Jiaoqiu's in-game abilities, top, fan, and phone case; Wei Wuxian's hair ribbons and clothing accents [and his powers in the donghua])

Yes, I do completely admit that my brain went "omg jiaoqiu = wwx" when I saw that Jiaoqiu was a fox connected to red and spices. What can you do?

For a while, the connection stayed that way: Surface-level and with a bit of reach. But now Jiaoqiu has been released, we can see his Character Stories, and we've seen him in action in-game !

Our Foxes and their Wish to Help

The biggest and most important shared character trait they have is their dedication to helping/saving other people. Some people call this a "saviour or hero complex" in regards to Wei Wuxian, but that's just not what it is. I'll explain.

This lifelong dedication is not something you can immediately see at first glance. Both Wei Wuxian and Jiaoqiu look and feel like the archetypal trickster character with their pleasant smiles, natural charisma, and that vague sense of 'hey maybe this guy may have something planned but we don't know what'. Wei Wuxian is definitely seen by others as a lax troublemaker, while Jiaoqiu has been described in his introductory blurb as "greeting people with a smile on his face and a scheme in his heart".

They're both devious little trolls ! In the Primaveral Swordsage Event, Jiaoqiu literally slipped laxatives to IPC workers so March 7th can win and if that isn't the most Wei Wuxian thing ever then I don't know what is.

But as you go through their stories, you realise that beneath all that is a soul who just really wants to help people. Jiaoqiu walked a different path from his Alchemy Commission family to become a combat medic because "it is ultimately not compatible with my wish to practice medicine for the masses" (Character Story I). Wei Wuxian risked his already shaky position in the gentry to save the Wen Remnants who have been condemned by the rest of their society.

Both are also well-acquainted with the phrase "no good deed goes unpunished".

Jiaoqiu watched so many of his patients walk directly back to their death after saving them that he literally had to quit practicing medicine. Each death whittled away at his heart piece by piece until he was left questioning his purpose as a healer.

Wei Wuxian stuck with his decision to help the Wens until the very end. He died reviled by the Cultivation World and people still curse his name over a decade after his death. The very people he risked it all for are also gone, save for two.

The tragedy of their lives are intrinsically connected with their entirely selfless desire to help others, especially since they both have the skills to do so and, in Wei Wuxian's case, because no one else wanted to do so.

The difference between the two of them is how they coped after their respective tragedies. Jiaoqiu ended up pretty jaded by the war he went through and quit practicing medicine. In his words, "Those I saved only ended up as another dead soul when they dived head-in back into the battlefield." His retirement doesn't last long though. He was then approached to become his General's healer and he accepted. Despite it all, he still wants to help. His heart is terribly broken, but even it couldn't squash his innate wish to help and heal.

Meanwhile, Wei Wuxian is introduced and he immediately jumps into saving a couple of strangers. A couple of teens, because he had the assets to do so and because no one else was around who could. And he continues to help even after the contract that brought him back was fulfilled because he can and he wanted to. He went out of his way to help those who he thought hated and condemned him because that's just who he is.

They don't go around helping people because they want to be the hero. They aren't looking for any kind of glory or prize for all their efforts. They just happen to be people who want to contribute to the betterment of the world. They both feel that they do this best by helping where they can. They're not reckless or neglectful of themselves. Jiaoqiu left when it became too much for him, Wei Wuxian exhausts all possible avenues first before he goes for the last resort. Their perceived mistakes and losses weigh down on them by the time the audience meets them.

This dedication is their biggest asset and at some point became their worst detriment. Wei Wuxian's story is finished and we know it ends in a hopeful note despite all the losses and heartbreaking revelations. Jiaoqiu's story is still ongoing and I can only hope that my boy gets the happy ending he deserves :(

Smaller Connections

Jiaoqiu and Wei Wuxian have a few more traits they share !

They're both good with kids ! Wei Wuxian is pretty fond of the juniors and they are very fond of him right back. Jiaoqiu's interactions with the younger characters are soft and cute, and they fuss over him as much as he fusses over them !

They're both inventive lil dudes ! Wei Wuxian's inventions have improved the quality of night hunts by the time he is summoned into Mo Xuanyu's body. Jiaoqiu has been mentioned to continuously improve upon his family's medicinal formula while in the midst of war and his medicines have been described to be "unusual but profoundly effective". His Character Story I has an old man say "Others can hardly even invent a few decent medicines in their lifetimes, yet a single day is all you need to achieve that and more." in regards to his medicines

They both don't like plain foods because they're "boring". Though Jiaoqiu's may just be a side effect of his diminished sense of taste from trauma.

BONUS: They both have a quieter companion who are perceived by others as "cold and distant" and are known to be particularly clean and tidy.

So, that's it ! :D This is literally me peddling my WWX-IS-JIAOQIU-AND-VICE-VERSA agenda for funsies ~

[adhbombus]

Hello Inanimate Insanity nation I bring a headcanon for this side of the osc. Obligatory II2, 16 spoilers

Given that they were created by MePhone4 for the show, Cherries* and YinYang’s experience and knowledge of plurality comes exclusively from each other. MePhone4’s knowledge of plurality is very surface level and when making YinYang’s personality stereotype he assigned a “good” and “bad” alter based on his understanding of Yin and Yang as a concept.

While at Hotel OJ Cherries did tones of research and tried to help Yin and Yang get along better. Yin learned as much as he could when he could convince Yang to go. Despite how unruly he was back then, Yang was actually listening (“Not like there was much else for me to do”) and during/post III Yang would accidentally reveal things they learned from Cherries and get flustered.

*The Cherries brains are connected via their stem and severing the connection kills both of them. Theoretically both of them can control both halves but they get along so well and are used to the side they’re on they stick where they are. (It would be silly if if they get MePhoneX’d they switch sides upon recovery like when Yin and Yang were) They consider themselves plural due to how dependent on each other they are, their mental connection and ability to switch sides.

[oscconfessions]

Yinyang canonically listening to vocaloid is so insanely important to me you have no idea. Yin likes the cuter poppy songs and Yang loves edgy rock. They cannot agree on what to listen to and they've only stopped arguing about it bc the cherries got them to alternate each other's songs. Full combo on all Project Diva songs (they have broken the controller multiple times to get to that point)

.

[nanaminsnecktie]

NANAMI KENTO

HEADCANON #2

Tags: fluff

Jujutsu Kaisen Fanfiction

Nanami Kento x Fem!Reader (with dark hair)

"You already pull off blond hair well. But black color could be interesting too." you run your fingers through his hair.

Nanami chuckles, “Trying to change me already?" he teases.

You narrow your eyes playfully. "No, just exploring possibilities."

“Besides, your dark and my blond hair is like yinyang.” he gently brushes a strand of hair from your face. “My ‘light’ to your ‘dark’, my ‘yang’ to your ‘yin’. Opposites who complement each other perfectly.” he kisses your forehead tenderly.

[tallerthantale]

What Does Aziraphale Actually Believe, Part 3: The Case for Ineffability

This is a series of my takes on what Aziraphale believes through the timeline of the show. It is all my personal interpretation, and I am happy to hear others. You don’t need to read them all in order, but know that I am coming from a perspective on Aziraphale’s machinations that can be difficult for people without a psychology background to follow without the first two as a primer. The quick version is that Aziraphale has a set of beliefs that exist in some form or another within his mind. However, at any given moment, only some of them exist ‘with awareness’ or as I am putting it here, conscious!Aziraphale only has access to the beliefs that the rest of his mind, veil!Aziraphale, allows him to know about. The context of the moment will determine what lives on the surface and what stays buried behind the veil, whatever arrangement best prevents a threat to Aziraphale’s sense of self and makes whatever he is inclined to do feel right.

In this post I will be mostly focusing on ineffability; its origins, its associations, and its utility. For all that we call them the ineffable husbands, I have myself and will continue to do so, ineffability belongs to Aziraphale. Crowley scoffed at Aziraphale for it for 6000 years, up until Aziraphale used it to land the final blow ending Armageddidn't. It has value, and Aziraphale brings that value to the table in his discourse with Crowley. About 3.2k words. I meant for it to be shorter, I got carried away.

Religion Without Words 

At Eden, Aziraphale has probably spent some time considering Crowley's fall. Realistically I think the reason Crowley is hearing the ineffable argument for the first time at Eden is that the exposition needed to be present as Aziraphale - Crowley dialogue from the start of S1E1 for narrative reasons. However, I like taking on the headcanon that Aziraphale developed his opinions on God's ineffability as a result of Crowley's fall, as a way to try to reconcile his negative feelings about something God had done. 

Aziraphale has concluded that the reason he struggles to reconcile a terrible thing happening to someone he cared for at the hands of a nominally benevolent God, is that it's all part of a grand plan he isn't supposed to be able to understand. I have never been a Christian, but from the outside this sure does look like a typical Christian rationalisation, and I believe it mostly is one. @takeme-totheworld has a lot of insightful things to say about the Christian perspective that I’d recommend reading. However, there is one bit when Aziraphale describes ineffability that stands out to me as noticeably something else. 

If you are in deep in the fandom, you have probably encountered at least one of the times David Tennant has described Crowley and Aziraphale as the yin to each other’s yang. Yinyangs originated an element of ancient Chinese philosophy, and are currently a component of many different belief systems across East Asia, most prominently Confucism. However, when they get brought up by westerners, (myself included, hi, I’m the problem it’s me) it’s usually in the context of their role in Daoism.

A line from God’s narration (an the book) that sets up the thesis of the story is very Daoist coded: "most of the great triumphs and tragedies of history are caused, not by people being fundamentally good or fundamentally bad, but by people being fundamentally people." This line, David’s description of their relationship, and the multiple shots in the show of the pair that are deliberately evocative of a yinyang symbol, give me the impression that the Good Omens team is deliberately working Daoist perspective into the story. The most telling bit though, is Aziraphale's description of ineffability.

Aziraphale describes God's plan as being ineffable, because "It is incapable of being put into words." Not ‘shouldn't be put into words,’ INCAPABLE of being put into words. This sounds to me like a reference to "The way that can be spoken is not the constant way," a common translation of the most iconic line of the Daodejing, understood to mean you can't describe Daoism (or the universe according to Daoism) with words. This may seem like a reach, I assure you it is not. Daoism unambiguously holds the creative commons copyright on ‘religion that is incapable of being put into words.’ It’s the only thing about Daoism that isn’t ambiguous. 

However, as Aziraphale describes it, it's mixed in with the more Christian "It's not for us to understand." Daoist ineffability is about a non-sentient collection of principles of the universe that can't be communicated in words, because it just doesn't work. Christian ineffability is the supreme will of an all powerful entity that won't be communicated in words, because it’s a test of faith. The Christian approach is often to fall back onto the institutional hierarchy and do what you are told. Aziraphale looks on the surface to be following the Christian approach, but in a lot of ways he is actually taking a more Daoist approach, and that is what he will use to separate himself from the institution of heaven, without separating himself from God. 

Would You Prefer an Unorganized Religion?

(This was a sarcastic sign on a church near my undergrad college many years ago, in response to a local backlash against organised religion. I found this incredibly funny, because my answer was and is an unironic, enthusiastic, YES.)

I think that for people used to organised religion with hierarchical religious authorities and formal institutions, who have experienced religion as a form of social control, it can be counter intuitive to consider the idea of a spirituality / religion that doesn't operate like that. This isn't to say that there aren't branches of Daoism that have set up structured institutional authority, but from my perspective it makes about as much sense as Prosperity Gospel Christians and Supply-Side Jesus. In any case, the anti-hierarchical flavour of Daoism is the one showing up in the subtext and it's the version that I am familiar with, so that's what I'm going to talk about. 

In this world view, the full acceptance of the inability to put spirituality into words or communicate it to others doesn't function as a way to keep people in their place, it functions as the exact opposite. I can’t express the Meaning of Life in words, and neither can you. I can’t tell people how to live in accordance with The Way, AND NEITHER CAN YOU. You are literally the pope? I don’t care, you still can’t. So how does an anti-athoritarian Daoist decide how to live their life? How do you resolve it being impossible for anyone to tell you what the Daoist thing to do is? Look, if I could tell you, it wouldn’t be Daoism. The closest I can get is that it involves putting a lot of work into being at peace with yourself as you are, and being true to yourself as you are when at peace. The interaction is vitally important. Being genuinely at peace with yourself, flaws and all, gets the background mechanisms of your mind to be a lot more relaxed about allowing you to perceive clearly, and that gives you more breathing room for whimsy. Putting faith in your intuition where you aren’t at peace with yourself can fuck your shit up harder than a sideways pinapple. 

Just an Angel That Likes Food

Aziraphale runs on intuition, and when he is still wrestling with his hidden conflicts behind the veil, he gets messy. When it’s about something he has made his peace with, he does rather well. Once Aziraphale realises he likes food, he doesn’t waste time agonising over it. He’s just an angel that likes food. At first he is appalled by the wine, but not after he’s tried it. Now he’s just an angel that likes wine. And cocktails with little frufru umbrellas. And music. He will go on about keeping up appearances to avoid scrutiny from Gabriel, but I really don’t think Aziraphale has any internal qualms about what it says about his existence that he likes food, tea, hot chocolate, alcohol, and music. He just likes them. He just is.*

At some point between Before the Beginning and the modern era, Aziraphale has developed the capacity to fully stop respecting what the institution of heaven says, because ineffability means no angel, archangel, Metatron, contract, permit, office, or institution can speak for God. Consider Season 1 Aziraphale having no time for The Metatron’s title; “You are the voice of God like the presidential spokesperson is the voice of the president. I actually need to speak to God.” The great plan is a bunch of words, and God plays games, so it isn’t necessarily the ineffable plan. Right after the discorporation, the angel general orders Aziraphale to prepare for war, and he's just like… nope. Bye. He prevents the war by calling Gabriel out to his face for assuming God's intentions, and Crowley only joins in after he is shocked that it worked.

Where modern Aziraphale most readily loses his internal peace is when there is a question of him being personally out of step with God, and with the hypothetical of what God would want an idealised heaven to be. Only God Herself, in all her ineffable glory, who’s will cannot be communicated in words by definition, who’s playing games with rules She won’t tell you. But then he can't ever know if he really is out of step with God? EXACTLY. If he intuitively feels like he is aligned with God, nothing the universe throws at him from the outside can ever be evidence to the contrary. 

Isn't he just as bad as Gabriel then? Arguably he's worse. Gabriel admitted to himself that he didn't know God's will when called out about it. However, at least the things that intuitively feel right to Aziraphale tend not to be eradicating all life and destroying the universe, so there's that.

On an Overabundance of Optional Opinions

The solid wall modern Aziraphale has up to defend his sense of his relationship to God took time to build, and it started at Eden. As Aziraphale introduces the ineffability Concept to Crowley, the tool is still in development as far as separating himself from the institution of heaven. The scene introduces a lot of Aziraphale’s contradictory optional opinions.

He can stand by his decision to give away the flaming sword.

He can believe it's possible it was 'the wrong thing' or 'a bad thing.'

He can believe angel’s can’t do the wrong thing by definition.

He can believe Crowey is a demon now.

He can believe he has a responsibility to never do the 'wrong thing.'

He can believe what constitutes the 'wrong thing' is determined by God's will.

He can believe he is obligated as an angel to enact God’s will.

He can believe he cannot be told what God's will is.

He can believe he isn't supposed to understand God’s will.

That is a pretty messy pile of things to believe in the span of a few minutes. Some of this mess is resolved by Aziraphale simply not having contradictory beliefs in his awareness at the same time. Some of it is resolved by him finding squigly ways for the beliefs to not necessarily contradict each other exactly. 

As I got into above, Aziraphale runs on intuition, that lets him have a sense of what feels right, and that gives him motivation to act without instructions. Belief follows action. He gives away the sword because it felt like the right thing to do, and now he has his reasons for that and he is invested in standing by them. Now he is worried that action could have been ‘the wrong thing’ which he is treating as a term of art for the policy position of the institution of heaven. 

Aziraphale can now separate what he personally prefers from what the institution of heaven classifies as right. He prefers the universe in which he gives Adam the sword. The institution of heaven may disagree, and that would mean that Aziraphale giving Adam the sword was 'bad', but Aziraphale will still prefer the universe in which he gives Adam the sword, and can argue the point. The pro giving the sword away argument is earnest, but it also feels very defensive. If it was 'wrong,' what he prefers is wrong, and that would be 'bad' and he isn't allowed to be 'bad', he is an angel. This is a threat to his sense of self. He is panicking, and is becoming willing to grasp at straws.

In seeking reassurance, Aziraphale earnestly appreciates it when Crowley says 'you're an angel, I don't think you can do the wrong thing.' Taking that at face value is WILD, given that it is a statement made by someone who was an angel, and now isn't, because he was punished for what he did while he was an angel. While there are questions about the details of how and when turning into a demon happens that we will get to later, I think Airaphale’s current understanding of the demeaning process would include: angel commits a fall worthy act, then becomes a demon. This is how he thinks it works at the start of Uz. So as we would assume Aziraphale sees it, Crowley was an angel, did something that was ‘the wrong thing,’ and then became a demon. You would think that this would imply that it is possible for an angel to do the wrong thing. 

Aziraphale’s mind has options. Either an angel definitionally can't do the wrong thing, or demons exist because angels can fall after doing the wrong thing. As long as they aren’t both in conscious!Aziraphale’s awareness at the same time, it works out. For this part of the conversation, the notion that an angel can do the wrong thing and fall for it is staying out of his conscious awareness. That lets him grab onto reassurance that he did the right thing by definition. Keeping things behind the veil is fairly normal behaviour for a mind, and if this was Aziraphale talking to another angel it would hardly be noteworthy. The wild part is managing to not have the concept of ‘demons exist because angels can fall’ in your awareness while in the midst of a conversation with a demon who fell so recently you needed to ask them what their new demon name was less than a minute ago. The incentive to believe that as an angel, he can’t do the wrong thing was very powerful. But it wasn’t enough to eliminate his doubt, guilt and shame, particularly after Adam kills the lion. That doesn’t feel right to Aziraphale, even after all his concerns about vicious animals. 

An Ineffable Back Door

The real power play is ineffability. The seeds are there for Aziraphale to realise the institution doesn’t represent God if NO ONE can know God’s will, but he hasn’t fully put that together yet. “It’s not for us to understand,” is still him putting himself in his place, or it might have come out ‘it’s not for anyone to understand.’ But there is a crack in the cage destined to become an exit. Aziraphale has started thinking for himself in a way that the other angels don't, and he has come up with ways to rationalise his individual agency. He has his own opinions, and while he has trauma responses when it seems like he might get in trouble, or that a certain opinion isn't acceptable, he will act on his own where there aren't any guidelines. For now, he still tows the company line when he is given orders. 

At the Flood, Aziraphale is trying to be ok with what God ostensibly decided, but he's clearly put off by it. It doesn’t feel right, but neither does disagreeing with God. He tries to focus on the positive. The rainbow will be a promise to not drown everyone again! She's just wiping out the locals... not all of them...  What I want to focus on though, is that Crowley asks about the sword. Aziraphale says God didn't mention it again, Crowley says that's probably for the best. I think Aziraphale is being a bit dishonest with Crowley as God did mention it at the wall, but I think there is a degree of honesty in the fact that he doesn't seem to have been punished or reprimanded by God for it in any way. Both at Eden and at The Flood Crowley has revealed that he believes God would consider giving the sword away to have been the wrong thing. I think it's a reasonably safe headcanon that the other angels would have a similar opinion. But Aziraphale faced no consequences from God for it. I doubt Aziraphale believes he lied to God successfully. I would argue Aziraphale thinks God either approved of or was pretty indifferent to the whole sword business, and everyone else figured it wrong. However, we don't have evidence for Aziraphale thinking that way until Job, and that’s where we’re headed next. 

Post 3/10

End Note 1: On Aziraphale lying to God. 

Aziraphale often tells obviously pointless lies as a shame response. Consider the travel sweet, claiming to have never heard of Gabriel, ‘I don’t even like you’, ‘we don’t know each other’. As such, I don’t take his lies to God at Eden to mean he doesn’t believe in God’s omniscience. It could be that he typically believes God is omniscient, and that got stuck behind the veil in a panic, but I honestly read it more as a compulsive behaviour that’s not even engaging with the question of if his lies are believable. 

End Note 2: On Aziraphale’s Character Arc. 

I see Aziraphale’s journey as a very Daoist coded one, and there is good reason to set it up that way. Good Omens is largely about deconstructing black and white thinking and black and white morality. Crowley represents someone assigned into the category of being evil, behaving in a way that undermines our understanding of the concept, which lets us understand him as not actually evil, and we want him to not actually be evil. We love him for it, it’s a great story. It is also a much easier narrative to process than the mirrored version in Aziraphale, which requires us to want him to grow as a person towards a goal that isn’t being good. Now, obviously a huge chunk of what’s happening is that heaven doesn’t represent actual good, they represent fake good. The thing is, they represent fake good because the concept of good and evil is inherently flawed to begin with ON BOTH ENDS, that’s what the Good Omens narrative is pointing out. 

We understand Aziraphale’s mistake at the end of Season 2 comes from him trying to fix the system instead of trying to dismantle it. I agree. His mistake was that he looked at fake idealised good, and wanted to make it real idealised good, instead of processing that there is no such thing. Crowley’s character arc deconstructs the concept of evil, Aziraphale’s character arc deconstructs the concept of good. Daoism may be the most known religion / spirituality that purposefully doesn’t push towards an idealised ‘good’. It’s not just a presumption that it isn’t realistically attainable, it straight up isn’t the objective. The goal is just to be.

[insanityoftheinanitmatekind]

My theory on YinYang having DID

Yin Yang is known for essentially being two people trapped in one body. Yin, who is considered the “good side”, and Yang, who is regarded as the “bad side”. I would like to start this by clarifying that I don’t believe Yin and Yang are “good and bad” because at the end of the day, what many people forget is that things aren’t black and white. Even in the Chinese symbol, there is white in black and black in white. So while analyzing Yin and Yang, it is important to remember that both of these characters are more complex than simply, “White is good and Black is bad” Now onto the actual analysis. 

The season starts off with Yin Yang being introduced through a challenge where contestants must push each other off of a giant piece of ice that they are all standing on. Right away we are introduced to Yin and Yang’s dynamic. They are seen fighting with each other and eventually push each other off the iceberg. So what does this have to do with DID? Well, a lot of times, when two alters that are co-fronting together don’t agree with each other, it can become similar to a game of tug-a-war for control of the body. Which is almost exactly what we see happen with Yin Yang. Most of their season two appearances are them fighting with each other. This is an example of a system that doesn’t really know how to work together. That can lead to fights that we actually see throughout almost all of season two until he is eventually eliminated. 

Season three is when things get a little more interesting. Yin Yang gets a bigger part in the show this season. During this season, we get a little more info on Yin and Yang. One thing I noticed almost immediately is that Yin and Yang talk about their “mind bedrooms”, which sounds like a metaphor for headspace if I’ve ever heard one. Another big thing I noticed is that over time, with the help of their friend Candle, Yin and Yang start to argue less and even learn to cooperate with each other. At one point, Yin and Yang become comfortable enough to give control over to each other completely. While no, systems can’t normally choose when they switch or who they switch with, unfortunately, we do have to remember this is still fiction so not everything will be accurate. Anyways, back to my point. Over the course of season 3, Yin and Yang become a more functional system, which we all applaud him for. 

So, looking at all of the evidence, Yin and Yang are most likely a system. During season 2, they weren’t the best at working together, but after some work on themselves and a little therapy, they learned to work with one another and understand each other better. A lot of their dialogue and even some of their storylines are very similar to our experiences as a system, which is where we got the idea in the first place. Another thing that helped us with this theory was our friend who pointed it out. 

[kyuummie]

I am absolutely insane abt c!TNT duo, and don’t have anyone irl talk to abt them :[. Pls info dump to me abt c!TNT duo and pls bestow upon me any and all c!TNT duo headcanons that u have. It’d absolutely make my day (also, ur pretty cool and I like ur Tumblr)

i am SO mad i had entire PARAGRAPHS OF AN ANSWER to this but it didnt save as a draft. TWICE. Anyways i finally decided to check my inbox..!!!!!!!!!!

And thank you! im not creative when it comes to hcs so heres ramble about metaphors and comparisons that are canonical/headcanon for ctntduo. Would base this on canon divergent interpretations but Nah

1- yin/yang

very obvious. “he is my yang”. recognizable and iconic. Two opposites which bring harmony. self perpetuating cycle of two interconnected sides.

the self perpetuating part is very important. it has always been established that they have a push and pull for everything, because they relish in the other’s reactions and its almost instinct. it all started this way too, their upbringing puts them in a very strange position slash relationship. they “balance” each other out — rather,, they teeter on a tightrope keeping them entertained and enabled . they are sides of the same coin, and complement the other. they always have a quick witty quip ready for the other’s petty insults, so so predictable. they dont keep harmony and peace between them, more so a light to keep them going similar to a smoker lighting cigarettes over and over again (insert the 10000 arts of wil lighting his cig with Qs light and vice versa. my fave ever) its close to an addiction, they need each other to keep running and flowing in the most unconventional ways they can find. if you look carefully, they are always circling enabling balancing each other

2- fire/light/burning

i like the metaphor of cwil being under the spotlight of people's perception .. sure, its cool to finally be able to see and interact with people but Q is different. he isnt and never will be afraid of wil. he is only "unpredictable" to him. freakishly enough this is also entertaining to Q. what will he destroy next? graffiti next? say next? do next? he cant help himself but to react. wil on the other hand will do anything to get a petty reaction from Q, to get his precious eyes on him that makes him burn in the light. tearing each other apart then rebuilding each other is an important component of their relationship me thinks

3- president/vice president

usually, i tjink this is a concept used to try and dethrone the other of their humongous egos and get that feeling of a win lol its all about reaction

their relationship is so interesting and weird because of the fact they wanted to over throw the other in politics — i dont think you see two POLITICAL rivals have that homoerotic tension often … anywhere! but i think its so funny that they became a version of the other further down the line (menace -> president, president -> menace) and it also goes back to the yinyang, over time and under certain conditions one can become the other because the other will always be present in the other. (like yin contains yang vice versa)

4- cannibalism Sorry /j

ok this is Strictly fanon. does this count as a headcanon i dont know.

if anyone remmeberes there was a certain point over on ctnttwt a handful of people were crazy for cannibalism ctnt go read whispers of blood and love. recently its become a not too uncommon/pretty popular characteristic for oc ships etc. of course its usually metaphorical in (ctnt) art and sometimes written but the act of giving yourself up completely to another to become a part of them goes pretty well with the psychology of ctnt/the game they play so i very much see the vision when people use this concept to depict Wil’s “devotion” (i guess? idk Refer back to ‘I am your servant’) to stay w Q in order to keep feeling that feeling of being “alive”.

it also goes hand in hand with quackitys want for power over people/things from beinng deprived of it in his earlier days. biggest stretch ever but also his capitalistic ideals to consume consume consume. and wil is willing to give him that opportunity because it is beneficial to him as well. horrible mutualism psa guys dont eat your boyfriend

these r mostly cwilbur centric mb. i also hate being wrong Which is why i hate having HCs. but why should i when theyre practically my ocs and the whole point of hcs is that theyre YOUR canon but oh well

anyone and everyone add on if u Like. Humble me if im wrong idc

[soopest]

SO GUYS. I FINISHED III

GOD DAMN DO I HAVE THOUGHTS GUYS. but i'll just cover things i think are relevant to the doodles i made afterwards. if you have any questions on my thoughts on things i wouldn't be impartial to asks or replies to the post :3 i just need to rant for a minute im so mentally ill please

knife is only there because my friend watched ii s2 and he LOVES knife and i was like. word. hes awesome so i drew knife for him

HOOO BOY OKAY nickel and balloon. it was a bumpy ride fellas. going immediately from s2 where nickel was kinda a POS to s3 where they suddenly became acquaintances was a little weird to me. (especially in that one episode where silver & candle interrogate nickel about baseball. no suitcase mention?? huh???) but it was cool to see their journey! the buddy-buddy thing seemed weird throughout earlier episodes because in s2 balloon and nickel kinda hated each other's guts so i'm glad that was covered in a later episode and that their friendship was actually solidified. BUT that doesn't leave nickel off the hook if he dont march his ass up to suitcase and say sorry the minute they go back to season 2 i'm gonna have a WORD with that boy

BOT!!! OH BABY BOT they are SO adorable and i loved the reveal that they were a robot! i was so mystified on how bow was magically alive at the beginning and seeing that it was just a product of tt and fan's grief was very heartbreaking... but seeing bot evolve into their own person was genuinely so so so beautiful and the representation for queer folks is done very gracefully and it's very wholesome. seriously im not even trans and i was tearing up like a little bitch y'all. fan and test tube are the parents ever it's so cute and they are the cutest fam ever

silver spoon and candle.... hrrrmmm you are certainly funny little guys.... i would like to put you in a jar and study you.... their sudden intense craving for winning was a little jarring but their dynamic is funny. i didn't like silver much at first but he def grew on me especially in the finals, and candle's friendship with yinyang was really cute too (still bawling he got out i really grew to love him.) AND dont think i didnt see ur blushing in ep 17 silver. im onto you

i already covered bot but i just needed to say their friendship with painty is the BEST THING and for some reason painty just stating they were nonbinary made me unnecessarily happy like YES KING (NONGENDERED) GO LIVE UR TRUTH WE LOVE YOU

cabby... oh you are an interesting little gal. i saw her design before ever watching iii and i was like wow! what a critter! but i'll be so honest at first i didn't like her because her information obsessed demeanor seemed very cold and calculating to me (and i'm so biased for fan and tt so when she got them out i was like. Girl.) but now that i understand her whole character arc, how she learned that its not always about the "facts" and how to lean on people, it was really heartwarming and shes rly grown on me. im a cabby appreciator

blueberry's whole fiasco was interesting. errrrrm u tried buddy that's all i gotta say. respect the hustle man

AND FLOORY IS THERE TOO i love him he's in the club of my favorite brits he's a silly guy

okay. if you read this far i'm so proud of you. also the whiteboard doodle was before i finished the series LMAOOOO um hope u enjoy that. thanks for reading my insane ramblings it might happen again i am not sorry

[wederyed]

I really love your designs for tissues and yinyang so much? Do you have any headcanons for them or are they just for fun?

TYSM!!!! AND YESSIR DO I!!!!

ok so for tissues i feel this is probably a pretty common headcanon (im new to the fandom) but that man has some chronic illnesses going on there. i feel as if he tends to need a LOT more rest than other people, which is why i designed him in sleepwear so hes always ready for a nap and always comfortable despite his illness. and while i havent drawn them with it yet, i do headcanon him to use a cane/other mobility aids as a result of his fatigue yk? also theyre siblings with soap just bc ofc. he/they aro manliker btw. and hispanic.

next yinyang!!!!! ill be going over my two designs, first off my conjoined twin one!!!! basically they were never able to be separated as most of their vital organs are connected and neither would survive the operation if they were separated, so theyre two peas in a pod. until the separation episode i think everything stays the same it was just some magic science bs yk yeah you know what i mean. ofc gave them some beautiful viltigo cause yk. black and white. makes sense. they can both control each others limbs with the others permission, and when one goes into “headspace” they basically just take a nap if that makes sense…

my D.I.D design is pretty self explanatory i think, i made him hispanic because theyre both just like me for real !!!!!! tbh i headcanon them to have more alters but yin and yang are the main hosts who cohost all the time yk? anyways both designs are aroace, yin is the aro yang is the ace LOL, neither have a specified preference other than the ideal man ever being tissues 🫶

relationship headcanon wise, they arent really specifically in a romantic relationship or a platonic one, i feel them being in a qpr makes the most sense. two bros who kiss. yeah. they both really enjoy helping take care of tissues (though yang will rather eat shit than admit that, he enjoys it because he wants to be more understanding and compassionate towards others, especially yin. yin is self explanatory why he enjoys taking care of tissues.) i think tissues is a real big people guy and loves meeting different kinds of people with different backgrounds, so seeing a guy whos actually two guys was super interesting and he wanted to learn more about them, plus hearing yinyang talk to each other while he rests is a highlight of the day, even if trophy tells them to stfu and get out of the room

anyways thats my ramble i hope you all enjoyed thanks for coming

[valenreina]

>> From Enemies....<<

I m back into MFB Nostalgia♡

So why not some

Kuraiko x Ryuga (YinYang Shipping) Lore

At the beginning of their story Chiko ( Kuraiko in disguise) and Ryuga couldn't stand each other at all. Kuraiko hated how Ryuga always thought of himself high and mighty and Ryuga was frustrated a nobody like Chiko could with his Tigress making it for L-Drago difficult to absorb Power . ( Idk how to explain it. Just imagine Razor Tigress with his claws out which then hook into L-Drago to push him easily away. Even tho Ryuga wins the battles it annoys him alot xD)

Although something shifted in Ryuga as Kuraiko's disguise was gone... ( Not like Love at first sight. Rather he was slightly impressed by Kuraiko- Without saying or really expression it-Come on it's Ryuga we talkin about XD )

[pebiejeebies]

And the moment you’ve all been waiting for. A CABLOON SCREENSHOT COLLECTION!

(Okay but seriously, even if you don’t like this ship, give me a chance, PLEASE— There’s so much things I didn’t expect from them both and.. just.. trust me <3)/gen /srs /nf

Now, if you’re easily overwhelmed by spamming letters or long paragraphs, this is a BIG WARNING!! Ilysm btw/p /p <3

Please don’t attack/harass me or anyone that likes this ship, if you like nickloon or any other ship with balloon, don’t hurt others for it.

Now. Let’s begin. A cabloon rarepair analysis, made by me, for my hyper fixated self and @saltythesaltshakerfrfr (Cause ur a cabloonie too!! :D)

First time they see each other/stand beside each other

E7! At exactly… *looks at video* 2:57!

The new pinkers!!

How ironic? Cabby and Balloon look concerningly at the silly spoon! Pretty cute if I do say so myself <3

And let’s not mention that they’re standing beside each other <33

and WOAH! The final three first meeting in the same team?! Pretty cool if I do say so myself.

“Uhhh.. mile high pie..?” — Clover

LOOK LOOK!! THEY BOTH HAVE A CONCERNED LOOK! THE SAME EYEBROW AND REACTION WHEN THEY WERE SHOCKED!! AAAAHHHH MY BELOVEDS <33 

ARMS RAISED, AND CONCERNED LOOK!! WOOWJAJJSJHEHH

(It’s close enough in my eyes okay? Plus,, they all have completely different reactions, and they were the closest <33)

also yinyang and goo my beloveds omfg <33

Wait, I didn’t mention that I’d screenshot EVERY SINGLE TIME THEYRE BESIDE EACH OTHER? oh I’m DESPERATE. (Sigh, past me, thinking that these two wouldn’t have that much between them.. hmm)

Call me ridiculous but these two are my babies <33 and I’ll capture every single moment they walk, talk, and laugh with each other <3

(At least enough to please my stupid hyper fixation on them)

JUST. LOOK AT THEIR REACTION WHEN THEY SEE SILVER SPOON, LITERALLY A COPY AND PASTE

SHARING THE SAME HATE TOWARDS SILVER SPOON, AAAANND HAVING THE SAME FACE AGAIN?! SOULMATES SOULMATES SOULMATESSSSS!!! YOU CANT PROVE ME WRONG!!

Don’t forget to mention their first face to face interaction, and OF COURSE it had to be the flower incident 😭‼️‼️

You say you’re angry Cabby, but why do I see you beside him so much..?/vpos

They love each other guys, you just don’t understand 

You guys just don’t see it yet, it will start showing up with patience. Wait for it.

No.. this.. ugh, GIVE ME A CHANCE I PROMISE!!

(Man I hate this episode so much,, my heart still aches from cabby’s reaction to this.. I feel ya girlie, been there, done that..)

IM NOT DELUSIONAL!! HE WAS THE FIRST AND ONLY ONE WHO STOOD UP FOR HER!! IM NORMAL GUYS AAAAHH!!

Test Tube you’re so frustrating this episode but I’m happy you’re changed

Look at him :( he feels so bad for her 😭‼️‼️

Haha taking a small break to see how much Me and Cabby act, and me reading people by their flaws was always the reason I missed out on so many friendships, and seeing Cabby struggle and get tips from Test Tube was really heartwarming to me (Do keep in mind, I literally kin Cabby)

And woah woah woah! Found out that Test Tube could be mouth wash! E10! At 18:00 <3

Alrighty let’s get back on track! (Ironic, past me, watching a whole episode with no interaction between them was actually unbearable)

Okay I’m desperate again,, does this count as anything? Not much, but seeing the final four together is pretty cool (E12)

SOULMATES!! I TELL YOU!! THATS THE.. 3RD TIME! THEY STILL HAVE THE SAME FACE!! THEYRE SOULMATES! ITS OFFICIAL!! (Oops, didn’t notice bot in this when I wrote this 😞 do I still count it..? Eh—)

(Part 2 here)