#literal shitpost

[writing-for-life]

Hahaha!

Marcel Rawady (CC licence)

Matthew: “Ew gross! Wasn’t me boss, I swear!”

Also Matthew (to himself): “Merv should’ve put the right sign up then. Maybe I’ll shit on your head next time, because you could honestly do with a bit of good luck...”

SFX Magazine

18 Jun 2025

Shared via PressReader (this is the whole article and pics, incl. interviews with Tom Sturridge, Freddie Fox, Douglas Booth, Sanjeev Bhaskar & Asim Chaudhry)

SFX HAS ARRIVED AT HELL. It’s probably not the first time in our 30-year history – and likely won’t be the last – but thankfully this trip is temporary and actually housed within Shepperton Studios in London. It’s February 2024 and we’ve been invited to a banquet – but this isn’t any ordinary meal, this is a gathering of representatives from several different realms, all of whom are vying for ownership of Hell once Lucifer abdicates. We’ll just graze, thanks. This is season two of The Sandman, which returns to Netflix in July for 12 episodes, including a standalone outing for Death. It’s also the final season, as Dream’s story is wrapped up in a slightly different way. “We’re remixing a lot of it,” showrunner and writer Allan Heinberg tells SFX. “There are a lot of standalone stories because we’re an ongoing series; it’s all focused on Dream’s character primarily. So we will weave in and out of flashbacks that allow us to get to know the characters. “All of the self-contained moments are incorporated into the narrative as flashbacks. For example, ‘The Song Of Orpheus’, which is a standalone Sandman special, that’s all now a flashback in episode five rather than its own episode. Thermidor, which we’ve included – a flashback to the French Revolution with Joanna Constantine – is an example of that. “Since we’re moving forward with Dream’s life, anytime we look backward, it’s as a flashback in order to give the present some context and meaning.”

SPLIT SCREEN

Today’s entertainment – for both us and the representatives of the realms in the banquet hall – is a magic show performed by Cain and Abel with sidekick Goldie the Gargoyle. As you might expect, the box-sawing trick doesn’t exactly go in Abel’s favour. “They’re just deciding how to chop people in half…” production tells us. Jamie Childs – who’s directing all 12 episodes of the season – is on stage figuring it out. The set smells of wood and smoke. There are extras in woolly robes who will later mingle with “representatives from Faerie, the demons from Hell, the Lords of Order, the Lords of Chaos, Shivering Jemmy, and the Chaos Brigade, Lord Susano-o-no-mikoto, who’s a Japanese storm god, and the Norse gods Oden, Thor and Loki,” Heinberg explains. The representatives all have different themed tables. The demons’ table is covered in entrails. There’s cling film keeping the eyeballs, hearts and livers “fresh”. The Norse gods have a lot of meat – over-sized turkeys on sticks so they look like giant legs. Another table has sweets, dolls and a Victorian creepiness, using the attic from The Woman In Black as a reference. Susano’s table has a bonsai tree and a sand garden – the sand is all modelled and fixed so that it can’t be moved. (continues after interview)

JUST ANOTHER DREAM

Tom Sturridge is Dream

Do you feel like you have a deeper understanding of your character now in season two?

You can’t help but have a deeper understanding after you’ve spent a year doing something, rather than when you’re a total virgin to the experience. Having time away from it was also incredibly helpful. There’s something about time breeds subconscious experience, which, ironically, is what our entire show is about, and that’s been very helpful with Dream.

But more than me personally, it’s such a communal experience, the making of something like this. What’s most thrilling is everyone together having an understanding of what they’re doing, because at the beginning, you have actors who can be obsessive about characters, but members of the crew don’t necessarily have a historic understanding of The Sandman. Suddenly now we all know what we’re in. So the thing that we’re building together is instinctive as a group and that is an incredibly unusual and magical thing to witness.

This season doesn’t follow the comics in a linear sense…

It’s difficult to talk about. It does and it doesn’t. The comics obviously don’t follow a linear story either. That’s what makes them so incredibly satisfying. That’s why it’s taken so long to adapt them, because long-form television is the only form that can deviate from a linear narrative. You can’t do that in two hours. If it isn’t linear, then it’s because it’s faithful to what the comics did.

When you do a first season of anything, there’s a lot of world building to achieve and a lot of introductions. What’s thrilling about this year is that is done now and we can dump you into the story and feel confident in who we are and people recognising the world that they’re in.

Was it easy to get back into the character?

It was exciting. It was thrilling to get back into it. I hesitate to say easy, but only because I’m not really sure how to quantify the experience. What I do want to say is that the thing that’s spectacularly different to the first season is that we have one director, Jamie Childs, directing every single episode, which is an incredibly rare way of making television. They did it with season one of True Detective. I can’t think of many directors who’ve done 12 episodes of something. What that means is it’s like making a film. It’s a completely holistic experience.

You don’t have that thing of having to reintroduce people every six weeks to what you’re trying to do. That is what is going to make the biggest difference is that there’s one vision telling the story. What has been particularly exciting doing the second season is going deeper, much, much deeper into his soul, as opposed to simply trying to lay the foundations of his history.

Does it change the process, working on a physical set?

A hundred per cent. The way the industry is evolving, you have everything in these productions from LED screens to just plain blue screen. The thing that I am so conscious of in my relationship with my own dreams, which I think people often forget, is how extraordinarily real they are and how almost all the time I don’t know that I’m dreaming. What’s incredibly, exquisitely important is to do justice to that experience.

So for everything within the show to be tangible and to be able to see it and touch it and smell it and feel it – credit to Netflix and the production team, they’ve committed to that. They’ve been building these extraordinary sets. In something that is so based on one’s imagination, it’s amazing not to have to use it that much. When they’re framing the cameras, they’re looking at the frames in the comics, seeing if there are things that are iconic that need to be realised and reflected. This is a Sandman made by Sandman fans. Therefore, it is immersive.

Do you have much involvement with your costumes?

Sarah Arthur, our costume designer, is a brilliant woman, and I would say has almost all the involvement. But I know the character well. I care about it a lot. I constantly want to be true to the comics more than anything else. But then there’s an aesthetic that I understand, that is historically related to certain musicians and performers. When it was written, the 1980s was the contemporary time, and now we’re in the 2020s. So you have to find an avenue that makes sense.

The combination of the historical sweep of the story and its dreamlike element allows for such creative opportunity and the sartorial aspect of it. The idea of what would the King of Dreams be wearing in 17th-century England? That’s a thrilling question, I imagine, as a costume designer to be able to pose to yourself and one that I think has been answered quite spectacularly.

What from season two are you especially looking forward to?

Having all of the Endless in one room together for the first time would be thrilling. It’s yet to happen. Interrogating this history of that family, be it Dream’s relationships, his loves, his children. Beyond anything, The Sandman is a story about a family and with all families; it’s funny, frightening, and deeply, deeply sad. It’s exciting to explore that.

(continued) Someone holds a model of Goldie in shot for scene 202/41, take two. “Jiggle, drop, separate!” someone shouts. The box splits and entrails fall on the floor to groans all around. The Goldie prop is then positioned beside Abel’s spilled innards. “Who’s on clean-up?” someone jokes. It’s then that Dream, aka Tom Sturridge, glides along the banquet hall and sits at a table. “I swear to God, he just floats across the set,” actor Douglas Booth tells us. “I don’t know how he does it. I feel like he maybe has those wheels on the bottom of his shoes.” A hush falls across Studio A. Dream takes to the stage. As he does so, a spotlight hits him. “Good guests,” he says. “That concludes the evening’s entertainment. I suggest you leave this room at this time. It will cease to exist shortly. Good night.” They try another take where he doesn’t pause between sentences. “That concludes…” Someone pulls the curtains on him and the crew laughs. “As for the matter that has brought you here… Oh fuck, sorry!” Sturridge exits the stage before returning to deliver the lines again, but with more dramatic pauses. Another take and the curtain hits a candelabra. It spins slightly but doesn’t affect filming. Another take and more smoke is pumped in. Another take, missing the candelabra. The curtains open and close, open and close…

FAN SERVICE

“It’s more of the same in terms of taking an arrogant, honourable, all-seeing, all-knowing deity and humanising him and teaching him – or watching him figure out what it means to be a good sibling, a good husband, a good father. Teaching him – we’re trying to teach him – compassion,” Heinberg tells us of what to expect in season two. “You get to know Dream and his intimate relationships a lot more deeply, especially the family relationships with his brother and sister. He starts to make choices that are emotionally responsible. This is somebody who, when we started out in season one, thought that he was the most important being in the universe with the most important job. It’s taken him a minute to realise that other people have other points of view and that his behaviour, though he thought it was honourable in the moment, has created all kinds of trouble for people he allegedly cares about. “Last season was about realising he made mistakes, and this season is about trying to make things right and the cost of that, to the point where if it becomes too dangerous, do you protect yourself or do you protect the people that you love? I think it’s a much more personal and intimate and emotional season than last season was.” He adds they never solely use scope and spectacle in order to tell the story. “Jamie Childs, our director, doesn’t like to rely on CGI. He doesn’t like to rely on the SFX or VFX at all. It feels better to him if everything’s in camera and if everything is practical. That really helps keep us focused on the emotional lives of the characters and what’s going on in the scene. “The demands of the show are ridiculous – beyond ridiculous – and somehow they make it all look gorgeous and easy, and nobody asks, ‘Why are we suddenly in an Elizabethan tent performing A Midsummer Night’s Dream while there’s a demon banquet going on down the hall?’ Everybody just goes with it, and it all looks really beautiful. It’s because we’re focused on this emotional storyline that I think it all becomes one story, regardless of whether you’re in the past or in the future or wherever.”

But it’s memorable sequences such as A Midsummer Night’s Dream that fans have come to almost demand of the production. “We try to preserve as many of the comicbook moments as possible and translate them in a way that feels like we’re fulfilling fan fantasies of what that would look like on film,” Heinberg explains. “But also the show dictates what works and what doesn’t and what’s moving the story forward for Dream at all times. There have been plenty of times where I’ve actually tried to include too much from the comics: we film it, and you see it in the context of the cut and of the story, and you realise, ‘Yeah, nobody’s going to understand this.’ “So there have been casualties already. But again, it’s bonus content for the website, and also the fans will love it because they can’t say we didn’t try!”

The Sandman is on Netflix from 3 July.

Gods and Monsters

Fred­die Fox and Douglas Booth are Loki and Clur­acan

SFX

18 Jun 2025

DB I’m playing Cluracan. I’m from Faerie, and I’m in the court of Queen Titania and Auberon, and my sister is Nuala. There is in the series – it’s quite a famous part of the comic – the A Midsummer Night’s Dream sequence. That’s where Dream tried to heal the relationship between the dream world and the Faerie world, as it were. We see it more in the form of flashback in our show. But basically, my sister has a bit of a soft spot for Dream. Dream is given the keys to Hell by Lucifer. The first couple of episodes is this great coming together of the Faerie world, the Norse gods – you’ve got the envoys from the Kilderkin, Lords of Chaos and Order. A lot to keep track of! Everyone comes together and it’s this great thing of Dream having to weigh up who should have the gates to Hell.

Nuala and myself, Cluracan, come to the Dreaming to try and convince Dream that he should give it to none of them because Faerie has a tie to Hell, which means that they have to give seven of their most beautiful and brightest every seven years. That’s the surface-level plot, and then you get into the personal character and stories.

But my character – because Cluracan means a leprechaun that haunts breweries and pubs – is always drunk and trying to sleep with everyone. I have a fun relationship with my sister, who is trying to do the right thing, trying to really impress Dream, fulfil her diplomatic mission, whereas I just want to get drunk.

Loki is the god of mischief. He’s got all sorts of monikers: Wolf Father, Cloud Walker, all of those things. In mythology, he’s an extraordinary composite of so many things. When he says Wolf Father, he actually gives birth to a wolf, so he’s actually really a Wolf Mother. Anyway, he’s known as this shapeshifting, chameleonic, mischievous, dangerous, very sexually curious sprite. More than a sprite. Sprite sounds inert and innocent. He’s not.

What he wants to do is to show the human realm the hypocrisy of their lives and introduce a bit of anarchy into the system because that’s essentially what humanity is, a hodgepodge of complete nuts-ness and trying to pretend that it’s not. He’s like, “Come on, you’re not.”

There’s a bit of the Joker in Batman about him. That’s his overriding mission which goes on a journey with Puck from his realm. Puck and he have a relationship, a long-standing, I guess, romantic relationship, but it’s a bit dyed-in-the-wool now. They’re a bit like a bickering old couple who go off and do their own thing. But their main mission together is to steal Daniel, the baby, and burn him alive. He’s a nice guy, really [laughs]. It’s really trying to hold the mirror up to humanity and go, “Look at yourselves, you’re ridiculous,” and, in the end, have a good time doing it. That’s his MO.

Family Ties

San­jeev Bhas­kar and Asim Chaudhry are Cain and Abel

18 Jun 2025

Do you feel you know your characters better now?

SB The characters are pretty clear on the page of the comic books. What you don’t know, what you can’t see, is the relationship. One of the things with us being able to hang out with each other is that you find that. You find that tonal thing, which isn’t necessarily on the page.

AC You find that dynamic. On paper, it’s like, “Oh, Cain and Abel. It’s a biblical story. Cain murders Abel.” But actually, there’s a lot of complexities about the brotherly relationship and about greed and envy. But it definitely feels more familiar coming back for the second season and just figuring out the nuances more than just him murdering me every episode.

Is Abel still the reluctant stooge?

AC Yeah, I think he is. There is still comedy in that, that violence with Cain and Abel. We did this scene today and yesterday – it’s funny. It’s the magic [saw] trick and Abel thinks, “Oh, but there’s a trap door. Just get in the box.” I do think he still is that innocent. There was this great scene that we did in the first season, and I’m climbing out of a grave and I’m talking to Goldie and I’m saying, “Cain doesn’t mean to murder me. It’s just the way he is.” There’s actually parallels of an abusive relationship where the person thinks it’s their fault.

SB We shot another scene where you see that nuance of fleeting warmth from Cain towards Abel. That’s the thing that you can only find in person, really, because you’re working off of each other. It’s very difficult to just plan that beforehand and go, “Well, I’ll give a little warm look at that point.” In your head it doesn’t work, but in situ it enables you to find it.

Are they looking forward to performing at the banquet?

SB Cain has been given centre stage on this so I think he’s relishing it. Otherwise, in the comic books and in the first series, they stay in their realm, in their House of Mystery and House of Secrets. For them to suddenly interact with this broader world, I think it’s a big thing for them. Abel looks forward to everything.

AC Well, he does. But also we are immortal. So even though Cain is killing me and my guts are spilling, we will be back. So that’s the great thing about these characters. So as long as Sandman goes, we can’t be cut. We can’t die.

What’s it like working with Goldie?

AC Goldie always steals everything, every time. We’re screwed with that.

SB He’s too cute. In fact, I’m also the Chancellor of the University of Sussex, and so I hand out the degrees twice a year. The winter graduation was last month. At least three people of the 2,000 people that crossed the stage, as they shook hands or gave me a hug, said, “That’s for Goldie.”

AC Like I said, Goldie just fucking steals it. Little prick.

The World of Sandman

Obser­va­tions from the set

18 Jun 2025

Dream’s private quarters are sparse, but huge. “It’s not homely. It’s somewhere he just comes. It’s a bit Zen, and it’s got that traditional feel to it, but elegant, very stylised,” we’re told by the production team.

The library from season one was filmed in Lincoln’s Inn Fields – this time it was built. They “kept the essence of it”, we’re told, with a table brought over from France in a van. “I thought it was a beautiful thing for Lucienne to be sitting at.” There are buckets everywhere because when Dream’s in a really foul mood it rains.

The show goes through many different time periods, particularly Ancient Greece – meaning that a lot of the set pieces dotted throughout the season are from Ancient Greece. “That’s the joy of The Sandman. Last week it was the French Revolution. Then the next week, we’re in Elizabeth I’s throne room that just happens to have an IBM computer in it. It’s a juxtaposition every week.”

Dream’s throne is very high. So high, in fact, that there’s actual bird poop on the 16th step (of 24, fact fans).

In Lyta Hall’s apartment we spot a copy of Dune and a book about latex fashion photography.

What’s Dream’s bedside book? (“It was black and French and I liked it,” says the designer.) My Priest Among The Poor (1925) by Clément Vautel.

[ninanyoka]

[hyuckonia]

Ghost Chef 1 stronger than me. i woulda quit my damn job or conveniently placed a cleaver into one of my essential internal organs

[cathoderaykobold]

I can't wait for this planet to get invaded so I can watch literally everyone misread it.

[stuffed-gutz]

straight thuggin on the terlet

[ladymirdan]

“Having a Nurglite boyfriend is so nice. He is so soft and sweet and cuddly, but whenever he cooks for me I shit fire”

“Then stop eating it.”

“But it's so good tho”

[aleppothemushroom]

💩

[velvees-archive]

save for the dual destinies dlc case, i’ve finished my first play through of the mainline ace attorney games. incredibly solid series. i have a draft with my thoughts on each case in the aj trilogy + game ratings. dunno if i’d wanna post it though, it’s kinda long.

so instead, i’ll post some misc thoughts about phoenix and edgeworth portrayals across mainline/aai + my personal favorite interpretations of them by the writing team!

spoilers for AA mainline and AAI duology

by far, my favorite phoenix portrayal is og trilogy phoenix. the way he interacts with his environment and the people around him is very authentic, albeit rude as hell (which, in hindsight, is even more authentic for phoenix, so…). saw someone’s tumblr post mention that phoenix is such a “straight guy” which…yeah LMAO. real to life accuracy, so much so it’s infuriating. i think what i’ve played of dd’s dlc case captures what i wanted to see from post-trilogy phoenix in that he’s still an asshole and comically stupid, but not actually stupid, if ykwim. something i disliked abt the rest of aa5 and aa6 is how the writing team watered his character down to the following two oversimplifications: “phoenix only wins cases bc he bluffs!” and “uhh...what evidence does phoenix present now?”

don’t mistake a silly man for a stupid man. mia calls phoenix a genius in the og trilogy. phoenix dives in head first but he’s meticulous when it comes to drawing out the truth. most of all, he doesn’t outwardly show how frazzled he is (see that one drew misham quote about phoenix quietly watching the court as he’s accused of forging evidence), even if he feels that way. i get the colorful usage of expressions is for comedic effect but it just makes him look like he doesn’t know wtf he’s doing, and that’s a disservice to his character. yes, he bluffs, but he isn’t clueless. anyway, i’m excited to replay the first trilogy now that i “know” second trilogy phoenix. that might also just be my way of saying “give me back MY phoenix”, bc the last time i’m (mostly) on board w his portrayal is in aa4, and even then i didn’t like the dialogue in his forged evidence trial.

*though, as of writing this, i’ve seen some good arguments abt his forged evidence trial dialogue that make me think ok maybe it was actually pretty accurate. let’s see wht i think on replay

on the other hand, my favorite edgeworth—at least in principle—is post-apollo justice edgeworth. in many ways, i think how he’s portrayed at 35 is how he would’ve been had dl-6 not occurred, barring his career choice. still a bit pompous, still fairly mean (at least on the surface, we all know he cares more than he lets on) and perhaps a bit uptight, but self-assured and just. the writing team makes a point to show that edgeworth doesn’t care about prestige or fancy titles. that feels like him in a way post-first trilogy edgeworth doesn’t. this particular point was fleshed out in aa1 and rfta, tho, so idk if i can give yamazaki credit for it.

there are some things that will always bother me abt post-first trilogy edgeworth (the problems are present in the aai duology as well) where the writing team shoves him into a box teeming with boring tropes for his character archetype.

an example:

creds for both these pictures: me

edgeworth is fine w pictures in the first trilogy, but comes to hate them in the aai duology.

ik it’s small but honestly what was the reason? what justification is there for this outside of wanting to fit edgeworth into a “cold character” stereotype?

bridge to the turnabout and turnabout ablaze are only about a month apart. i’m not buying into the sudden aversion to picture taking, regardless how minute a criticism it is. in any case, i feel like what i’m trying to say comes through w these screenshots: yamazaki’s edgeworth is always just a little off.

i am forgetting where i saw the post and i have too many liked posts to scroll thru to find it again but i saw a reblog?? tumblr post?? abt yamazaki and takumi’s diff approaches to edgeworth, where takumi says edgeworth listens to trot while yamazaki thinks he’d listen to classical music, and if that doesn’t drive the point home, idk wht will.

why then, did i enjoy post-aj edgeworth most? short answer is i’m taking liberties w his development and its implications. while i never completely buy into post-aa3 edgeworth, i can digest and get behind most of him when i’m not nitpicking, unlike w post-aj phoenix. does edgeworth feel a little uninspired and one- as opposed to three-dimensional? yeah, but his core is so strong i can overlook it. i’ll miss seeing a developed edgeworth when replaying the trilogy. him at 35 makes me feel warm inside.

anyway, i didn’t intend to start hating when i made this post bc i ultimately still believe the second trilogy was pretty good, if not overly ambitious with it's storytelling. maybe i'll post that AJ trilogy review.

overall, tho, t&t and aai2 were my favorite games to come out of the franchise. i’m going to do that slow replay of the first trilogy, aai duology, and aj:aa before making final judgments.

[leighsartworks216]

Girl help i forgot i was lactose intolerant

[abbiistabbii]

An open letter to the Supreme Court of the United Kingdom

Your Honours,

I am one of the people your judgment has affected. I am a transwoman. While throwing transgender and intersex people under the bus, locking them out of liberties and freedoms once previously enjoyed such as team sports or use of public facilities or the right not to be strip searched by the Men on the British Transport Police, I believe you have forgotten one major consequence of your actions: Transgender people will, very soon I fear, be forced into either not being able to use gendered toilets, be forced into gendered toilets that put them at risk of physical assault or rape or indeed, force men into women's toilets because they happened to be born with a vagina. I invite you to look up pictures of Transgender Men and rub your nose at the court cases that will occur because of your judgment at the TERF movement realise stalky bears will be forced to use the same facilities as them.

But I digress. In preparation for this likelihood, and so I don't need to memorise the location of every single stall toilet in Edinburgh, I offer a way to make amends to the transgender people you have now demoted to second class citizens in comparison to their Cisgender peers.

Offer up one or more drawers in your desk as a permament gender neutral toilet. Now this could me just for me or indeed all transgender, nonbinary and intersex people who request it, but if you are willing to lay the groundwork to have us excluded from gendered facilities in a vain attempt to prevent cis-male predators (who, by the way, do not have the good grace to upend their lives to end up in prison anyway), mayhaps one or more of you can take one for the team and allow us to give you a constant reminder of what you have done to the transgender, non binary and intersex communities in the face of a movement that rather openly wants us dead, be it by our own hands, their own, or the state's.

I promise I shall be good and drink plenty of water so the urine doesn't smell, and give you a running list of what I have eaten to make sure the odor of my turds will not be too overpowering.

Sincerely

Abbie Archer, BA (Hons, Hist)

[thefruitybanana]

Having a diverse set of friends is interesting because one minute I'm talking to one of my friends about a gay show we both love, and another minute a different friend is sending me a picture of literal shit.

[ninanyoka]

Caster Gilcatmesh fulfilling his kingly duties aka following his Master to the bathroom at exactly three A.M to make sure they aren't harmed.

[dustyoo10]

This is my Invincible War OC, his name is Inshitable. He is the son of Poopiman.

[misterlazer]

"Studies show that 4 out of 5 people suffer from diarrhea"

The 5th person who enjoys it:

[lesbiangremlin84]

it's all shits and giggles until somebody giggles and shits

lol