#love u all except Kc

[festive]

hello my beloveds it is IIIIII

[montywithchildhoodtrauma]

Incorrect quotes because... Good Eclipse and everyone else needs therapy.

Lunar: Here you go, Moon, a nice hot cup of coffee! Moon: It's cold. Lunar: A nice cup of coffee. Moon: It's horrible! Lunar: Cup of coffee. Moon: I'm not sure if this even IS coffee. Lunar: C U P.

Bloodmoon: Why are you smiling? Rays: What? I can’t just be happy? Moon: Eclipse tripped and fell in the parking lot. Bloodmoon: *snorts*

Jigsaw: I don't know, it's not my cup of tea. Lunar: Well then whose is it? Jigsaw, staring at a cup of tea: I don't know!

Jigsaw: If we were in prison you guys would be like my bitches. Bloodmoon: ...

Eclipse: I have no respect for Santa. Don’t sneak in through the chimney and undermine my authority by bringing my family presents. Walk in through the front door and fight me like a man.

Rays: You know, I used to play back in my gory days. Sun: You mean glory days? Rays: Ah, that too.

Earth: You have an impressive pain tolerance. Rays: Thanks, it's the trauma.

Moon: Lunar, Rays, I love y’all and all, but can I ask what in the hell are you doing? Lunar, trying to stabilize a tower of folding chairs that Rays is sitting atop: Oh nothing much. Rays: I love you too :)

Moon: You disgust me. Jigsaw: eating a kitkat sideways I realize this and don’t care.

Eclipse: Okay, help me, please! Bloodmoon: Got two words for you. Eclipse: I bet they won't be helpful. Bloodmoon: Your problem. Eclipse: I was right.

Monty: Why are Moon and Earth sitting with their backs to each other? Lunar: They had a fight. Monty: Then why are they holding hands? Lunar: They get sad when they fight.

Moon: WHO THE FUCK- KC: Whoa, language! Moon: I speak fucking English! KC: …

Lunar: I found a note in one of my old word .docs that said Note to self: Get revenge on Rays. Lunar: Except I couldn't remember what I was supposed to get revenge for. Lunar: But I trusted my own judgment, so I went with it. Rays: Hmm… I don't know what you were supposed to get revenge for, either. Lunar: I can only assume you got what was coming to you. Not 100 percent sure, though. Rays: Well, whatever I did, I guess I deserved it. Lunar: Let that possibly be a lesson to you.

Jigsaw: finds half a watermelon at Whole Foods Jigsaw, holding it up for everyone to see: LIES!

Old Moon: We are gathered here today because someone- glares at Monty’s coffin -couldn’t stay alive! Monty: muffled FUCK YOU, LET ME OUT!

Sun: So, Moon and KC. Sun: According to this, you two are being accused of: Armed Robbery, Vandalism, Drug Abuse, Grand Theft Auto… Old Moon: We had a bad day. Sun: And… MURDER?! KC: It was a pretty bad day…

Earth: You believe me? Monty: Earth, you’re the last good person on this planet (and Lunar). I‘d believe cartoon birds braided your hair this morning.

Lunar: I will send my army to attack! Lunar: releases a dumpster of raccoons

Rays, singing (lost a bet): I don’t want a lot for Christmas, there is just one thing I need— Moon: A better family. Monty: A better therapist. KC: Mental stability. Lunar: clueless Bagels?

Rays: The shadow realm? No, I’m sending you to Gator Golf!

Earth: Look, Lunar, it's the third time this week you had a mental breakdown and its Monday.

KC: You really put aside everything and came all this way for me? How did you even get here so fast? Rays: Several traffic violations. Sun: Three counts of resisting arrest. Earth: Roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks. Moon: Also, that’s not our car.

Sun: Eclipse, I sense hostility. Eclipse: Good, because I hate you.

Eclipse: Be careful, I thrive on negative attention.

Moon and Sun are in a car teetering on the edge of a cliff Moon: oh my god, Sun, backwards! Sun: Really, Moon? I thought I might go forwards into the river, I thought that would be a fun thing to do.

Lunar: Why would you do that? Monty: Because I feel guilty. Moon: Guilt is a trick emotion. It’s put there by your parents to stop you from doing things that feel good.

Monty: Why do you act like we’re three year olds? Moon, exasperated: WHY?!? Moon points at Rays: YOU TRIED TO HYJACK A CAR! Moon points at Lunar: YOU NEARLY JUMPED 20 FEET OFF A CARPARK! Moon points at Monty: AND YOU ATE MULTIPLE DRIED LEAVES AND ROCKS OFF THE GROUND! Moon: AND YOU ASK ME WHY????

Monty, trying to comfort Rays: What's the problem? Anxiety? Low self-esteem? Obsessive thoughts of random arson? I've been there. Rays: I- what?

Rays: If the thought of something makes any of you giggle for longer than 15 seconds, you are to assume you’re not allowed to do it. -to his Moon, probably.

Sun: We got a free day now. What do you wanna do? Eat? Sleep? Nap? Snack?

Rays: That sounds like a terrible plan. Moon: Oh, we've had worse.

[attourney-at-lycan]

i just finished mys s1 and here are my thoughts

i think it was honestly pretty fun, if i’m not trying to think about this show in a realistic way where aphmau would probably put a restraining order on garroth, laurance, dante, kawaii chan and travis-  and zane wasn’t arrested for breaking and entering bc of the christmas episode and katelyn, aphmau and kc weren’t homeless due to burning down the whole house and other possible crimes i might’ve skipped

but anyway- ignoring all of that- i honestly rlly thought this season was kinda fun? it could be the nostalgia and my childish humor talking, i rlly liked the funny slice of life episodic kinda story it was pretty great-

katemau was so prevalent (prevalent meaning small scenes where either i’m crazy and reading so much into it or it’s aphmau hinting @ katelyn’s sexuality) garroth was so fucking funny, i love his funny himbo moments and his fucking dumbass voice was great. his fucking “ohhh sprinkles!” moments were my fave- travis............................ when he’s not being creepy as fuck, he can be funny, but i think that’s honestly just funny voice that makes me laugh.

aarmau is so dry. i’m so sorry it’s so fucking dry. like i get they had most of their development during hs in pdh but i pretend pdh doesn’t exist (idk why i dislike it sm.) but yeah- aaron’s not really much of his own character, he’s not dimensional in my eyes? he’s just used to make other ppl jealous and to be The Better Boyfriend, if that makes sense? I ALWAYS SAY THIS BUT IT HAS TO BE SAID. CANON MYS AARON SUCKS ASS. I WILL NEVER SHUT UP ABT IT

kawaii chan... honestly the whole shipping thing was so fucking weird. aphmau was like “im fine w/ u shipping us as long as i don’t know about it” and yet throughout the whole series whenever aarmau moments were happening, kc made it so fucking obvious? i feel like kc doesn’t rlly... regard the feelings of others except like.. michi. her character makes no sense i’m sorry. i hope jess writes her better even though i know she’s not gna take off the whole suffix titles bc why would jess do that /s 

another thing, her voice doesn’t annoy me that much? there were even times where i thought something abt moeka’s voice acting for her was kinda cute? idk there’s a sound in her voice that i find rlly satisfying? sometimes though, there were moments i had to take off my headphones or lower the volume because jesus fuck

all in all- bc s1 mys was probably the only mys season i watched, i’m gna give it a 6/10 just because

ps this is rlly all my opinion and im biased towards certain characters yaddah yaddah so pls don’t take my shit seriously

[tisetso-flowerboi7]

i wonder if you know how i feel. nah i know you don't know. i always felt that we were kids, impressionable 10 year olds barely knowing our times tables. i always assumed we didn't know what we were doing, so therefore nothing counted. no bad word you said to me, no good word you said, no hug, no letter you wrote me with little hearts drawn on the corners, no song i sang or wrote about you, no tear i shed for you, no insecurity i made you feel counted. we were 9, 10. what business did we have being in a romantic relationship with each other...for a year?!!!! there we were, the talks during break, nothing hectic or obscene, the SMSes between us,inappropriate yet innocent, the jokes, your pretty smile, my mild humour (i was never really sure what you liked about me, i tried not to question it and saw my esteem boost, yk, you're my "baby girl") as you have it, we move on and forget each other, like 5 year olds who've just pecked each other on the cheek, didn't matter yeah? i thought so too until recently. you see ive never been one for physical affection, always been fairly soft, you of all people would know this...

always lived in a fairytale and you were my fairytale come true. i walked in and out of relationships throughout my teens, growing and meeting new people, but there's always been a disconnect. everyone seems to mature except me. 10 years after our juvenile love affair i find myself wanting letters from a significant other, wanting to talk for hours on end about inappropriate but innocent things, wanting to just sit in their company and see their pretty smile while my mild humor drives the conversation, not being sure what they see in me and therefore seeing a boost in my self esteem 'Cause hey, they're my baby girl. the world was full of color when i was in "love" with you. things were safe, alot more promising in 2014/5. Disney XD was still popular and I thought i was leo from lab rats and you were KC from KC Undercover. Bruno Mars' treasure would play and I'd think of you, despicable me had that character Margo who always made me think of you, that scene in despicable me 2 at the mall when she looked at her crush and "just a cloud away" always summed up how I felt about u, that's exactly how u used 2 look at me. you made me feel like I was likeable, don't get me wrong, that era of my life is where i was my most cocky about my looks, i was fire and i knew it, i didn't need validation but man did yours hit the spot! and when we talked? it was never deep or hectic as teens would speak about depression and their daddy issues, but we got along and flowed so well, it was perfect somehow, at age 10.

it hits me now, as i struggle to keep up with the pace of modern relationships. teenage dating is so complicated for me, it's abrasive to, involving sex and expensive things with the me and the other person never really connecting properly.

i realise what hastens my progress is that i still want a fairytale, our fairytale. it was safe, colorful and i understood it, sure there were horrible moments that have scarred me to date but 4 the most part...it made sense. we never kissed, hugged occasionally and we giggled alot, we liked each other, would stare at each other and i mainly just experienced u. i desire that but realise it was my first experience of a relationship and it did define my perception of dating largely, as my perception of it now is an advanced form of what we had, but I'm not 10 anymore. Disney XD was discontinued years ago, im 19, about 2 start my second year, looking for a job and fairytales don't exist.

i don't know if you'll ever find this, this is super cringe and i rarely write like this but if you do see this i want you to know that you'll forever be special to me, you're my sweetie pie, my "first love" and will never really leave my heart, that's why i don't forget January 15 every year.

anyways i made a Playlist of all the songs i used to sing about you, the songs that defined my understanding of love as a 9 and 10 year old with a girlfriend he barely gets along with. the title seems random but there was this day when i was 9 when i took a walk in July and the atmosphere was strange, the sun was shining but it was chilly, the streets in my neighborhood were empty (uncommon ko kasi), the clouds were bright and i just happened 2 think of you, so i called it "world mayibongwe day". it was probably the 9th of July idk. anyway, i hope you know there's no girl ive met that i respect more than you, i weirdly miss you and i hope you become successful as a musician (i always found the fact that you sing and play piano sexy😏)

i also know i messed up things between the 2 of us the last time (fun fact the day we last spoke i was at court to collect my parent's divorce papers, a petty excuse for my behavior that day but i was clouded im sorry) so yea Mayi, from Ora. this 3 page essay probably doesn't mean anything 2 u but thus revelation about myself has brought me so much peace, a gas refill on this journey of peace im on... peace and love ❤️

[vellichorom]

A MASS BATCH OF SKETCH COMMISSIONS FOR MY BELOVED @pastapastry & ALL HIS SCRUMBIMBLOS !!!! WAH 

[siarrawrites]

Rating Various Star Wars Curses

a guide w much real swearing, inspired by a midnight convo with @kckenobi​

-----------------

crink/crinking -- what the actual fuck is this supposed to be. Who came up with this??? We’re only a few letters away from ‘crinkled’ or even ‘tinkled’, god. No self respecting Space Adult is going to use this.---  -2/10 pls try again

sithspit-- a classic. can be found everywhere in fic. kind of sounds like you’re hissing, which the sith would probably appreciate actually. (do normal space ppl use this or is it just a jedi thing tho bc most star wars citizens dont seem to know abt the sith???) --- 9/10 very sssssssmooth

holy sith!-- again with the sith?? ok i guess. a pretty good alternative to ‘holy shit’ but lacks the pazzazz of sithspit which is 10x more fun to say ---6/10 reliable but uninspired

frizz/frizzled -- what is this, the magic school-bus? I love Ms. Frizzle with all my heart of course, which is why im disturbed by seeing her name used as an approximation of fucked (it kinda sounds like jizz too which I HATEE). I can maybe see it as a kiddie swear like frick though. ---3/10 what the frizz is this

dwang-- ...kind of strange but you know what I’ll accept it --5/10 haha dwang the rock johnson

e chu ta-- a solid fuck you. definitely sounds like a space language, and has a nice ring to it when said with passion. works for characters ages 9-->999, thank you kiddie anakin for this gem. --10/10, ‘a fine addition to my collection!!’

sleemo-- sounds like the word ‘sleazy’ and for once the real word association does it a favor. You hear this and just KNOW what kind of person it describes. ---8/10 honestly huttese curses can get it

farkled-- ...this is the name of a fucking dice game. also it sounds nasty                --0/10 get sued pls 

blast-- idk if this is actually a star wars curse or an irl thing, but it absolutely should be. you got BLASTers for cripes sake this shit writes itself -- 10/10 it just makes sense honey

son of a blaster-- ok we get it guns aren’t a thing in space. except they are. sob is great i guess but consider son of a slugthrower boom alliteration plus badass space guns lets go boys ---7/10 alliteration is key

kark/karking-- amazing. inspired. beautiful. I regularly forget this isn’t an actual thing and use it in everyday life. gotta love the hard consonants she is cathartic as kark to use. -- 50/10 she just hits different ok

kriff/kriffing-- basically ‘frick’. Actually sounds like a kid-ification of kark and I just really admire that about her. 10/10 all the cool initiates say kriff

bantha poodoo-- the one that started this whole discussion. listen, this is fine when you’re 9 year old anakin skywalker and say ‘yippee’ unironically but for anyone else this is just embarrassing -- 2/10 ok if you’re baby i guess

skrog/skrogging-- at first I was gonna rate this one low bc it sounds weird and is a synonym for fuck (which just ain’t it). but then I thought about it and realized that if you replace bantha poodoo with bantha skrog you actually have a somewhat decent word for space shit. --- 6/10 we done figured it out boys 

snark/snarking-- this is already a real word. why are you stealing actual live words out of the english dictionary sir that’s  i l l e g a l  --- 0/10 for plagiarism

druk-- a solid replacement for shit, and more serious than skrog (though bantha skrog sounds better than bantha druk imo). gotta love those consonants, and a ‘drukload’ of problems is a phrase that just works. 9/10 will always be there for you

krong-- I just... I dont... know? How i feel abt this. reminds me of king kong donkey kong AND kronk from emperors new groove. maybe thats my own brains fault but also where does this work?? ‘dont krong things up’ just use kark? ‘bantha krong’ just use skrog or druk. In conclusion? --4/10 ok but you can do better

schuta-- we’re branching out folks! finally, a twi’leki curse. she’s catchy and  very fun to say, but it does mean slut, and we respect women in this household. If you wanna make a very despicable character say it though it will help make us all want to beat ‘em up :) ---5/10 all women are QUEENS george

vape/vaping-- ... ill give u a pass bc I dont think vaping was a thing when this word was made, but this straight up doesn’t work in the blessed decade of 2020 ---1/10 you’re on thin fucking ice

shab/shabuir-- not to be confused w ‘shebs’ which is just mandalorian booty, this is mandalorian shit. Sounds like a real word, is mandalorian which automatically makes everything 10x more legit, and has that lovely insult variation! ---7/10 truly some shit I can get behind (heh)

vong-- we don’t mention the y**zhan v*ng in this household --- -∞/10 legends can get right tf outta here

shavit-- friends, I had to look this one up to make sure it wasn’t actually a real swear word. I think I’ve picked this one up through osmosis reading fic bc I’ve definitely used this in real life. that’s quality folks. --- 10000+/10, will unironically say this from now on

-------------

KC, I cried laughing at some of these I truly dont know where they come up with this stuff. 

there’s a lot more where these came from but i didnt feel like doing all of them, heres the link tho , knock yourselves out

[faunusrights]

OFFAL HUNT REMASTERED LIVEBLOG // CHAPTER 23

IN THIS EPISODE OF ??? I LITERALLY HAVEN'T READ IT YET SO UH WHATEVER:

WHAT FUCKING YEAR IS IT WHERE AM I

no but really HELLO GUESS WHAT UPDATED offal hunt updated AND SO I CAN COMPELLED TO LIVEBLOG... i honestly don't remember much of shit from chapter 22 except i called cinder a wet grape like twice BUT WHO CARES. WE CAN FIGURE IT OUT AS WE GO. WEEEEEEEEEEEEEE--

“Get up.” Glynda got up.

offal hunt has always such a masterful grasp on narration from a POV character... there's such simplicity to glynda's more staccato thought patterns that makes her view so unmistakeably Hers, and the fact it can vary between being Hardcore and more subtle is *mwah*. i love this huntress and her brain that is just, like, fucked,

Like the needle of a compass, she sought her out.

go-go gadget gaydar

“Because the Fang is hunting you.” “You too, if you’re with me.” “I’m with you.”

guys come on am i even 200 words in yet??? you cannot start with these feelies right out of the gate ive JUST woken up (i havent but still)

In the low timbre of a secret, Cinder said, “I know.” And looking away this time: “I know. Thank you.”

i love cinder in the exact same moment in the exact same breath that i would like to commit unimaginable acts of violence against her for being just. like That. Dumbass Central Station. i just wanna take a nutcracker to her and just *crunch noise* open her up like a walnut u know? u know,

“Please. I don’t understand what’s going on. I want to help you, but I don’t know what we’re doing. What happened to you? What’s happening to us?”

me, who knows but, like, also doesn't know: IF YOU FIND OUT I WOULD LIKE TO BE THE FIRST TO KNOW ACTUALLY,

If Cinder needed protection, she would protect her.

*makes a bunch of gestures at kc and diesel meaningfully but also threateningly* god i have so many things to say to you glynda but instead i just *heavy exhale*

The answer came shuddering out of her, as though it changed everything: “Yes. I promise.” And then: “You can trust me, Glynda.”

*HEAVY EXHALE x2*

changed everything huh............................................................................................................ hm. i'm certainly curious to know what yr definition of 'everything' is, cinder, because knowing you it's a very loose term,

The door slammed open; Glynda seized it with her Semblance and threw it back through the frame, cracking it against the bodies there.

"Room service-- AW FUCK"

She could trust Cinder. Cinder would explain everything.

bear with i'm just looking for a reaction image here... ah yes! here:

Glynda said, “I’m going to secure your arm. It will keep it safer.” She withdrew her belt and stepped in front of Cinder to fasten it like a sling around her.

glynda's pants drop around her ankles. she's wearing booty shorts that say 'juicy' across her butt. the red attracts the attention of every white fang member in a 20 kilometre radius. they die instantly,

Cinder visibly bristled. In her mind, Glynda pictured spiked Grimm pelt, hair raised on end, jaggedly furious.

i was gonna go find an image of a kitty all fluffed up as an example but then i remembered the content-aware scaling cats and i'm like what if she looked more like this

which, compared to glynda, is probably accurate.

“There you are.” Acknowledgement rankled at Glynda. Sienna Khan was talking to her even if she only had eyes for Cinder. “Cinder’s dog. If she brought you with her this time, she must have realized how serious I am.”

god yes i know sienna khan is a huge bitch in this and yet........................................ oghuguohohughoh i want to press every word she says directly into my EYES... offal hunt more like almost 100k of hot women,

Glynda caught Cinder by the back of the coat as she barrelled past. She turned to spit at her, already half ablaze, but Glynda held her close to her side. Cinder’s features twisted with such a fury that Glynda had never seen before; true, genuine bloodlust radiated from her, and it seemed at once that they were all in danger—even Glynda, just for standing between Cinder and her prey.

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD loving how cinder is just feral... sienna out here calling glynda cinder's dog whilst blatantly ignoring the fucking cat carrier behind her that's rocking around like its hosting a rave party,

Instead, Glynda grabbed Cinder’s wrist, hot like glowing metal, and stood in front of her to block her view of Sienna. With both of their backs to their enemies, they could only see each other.

i have MISSED THESE TWO SO MUCH ACTUALLY................ am sobbing in da club babes

She didn’t need protecting. Glynda would do it all the same.

glynda my good and tender bitch u do too much all the time. u r carrying this team. literally carrying it how much does cinder weigh to u? like a pebble? TWO pebbles???

“If we jump, they’ll have to take the elevator. It’ll take much longer. We’ll have time to find an airship.”

okay but imagine if she makes this jump and we cut back to adam and sienna listening to elevator music on the way up. just sort of awkwardly not looking at each other. maybe some other random person is there too. just chilling for a few minutes. it would be an important story beat, i think,

Her hand was perfect and warm in Glynda’s, and she squeezed it. She didn’t know why.

its the lesbsisianmism. lesbsianam. lesbaiaigiam,

Around them, a crowd had formed even in the raging storm. They held batons and knuckle-knives and wickedly edged blades. They held their grim purpose, no masks to disguise their looks of contempt.

they were waiting for the elevator this whole time

The tell-tale prickle crawling up her neck was unbearable—unbearable, and familiar. It ached like an old wound; her soul trembled to know it, weeping like an open sore, and her head swiveled, trying to spot even the slightest ripple in the clouds.

🤔👀

(hey did you know the emoji keyboard doesn't work on win11. sick. amazing.)

She was choking on Grimm, a hot and ashy feeling like brimstone in her lungs. Every breath carried the acrid stench of it up; it tasted like fear, and death, and destiny. She was sweating even with the rain, a cold chill running through her. She knew this Grimm.

👀👀👀👀👀👀 but DO you,

The feeling raking up Glynda’s spine was unmistakable, though—that ancient, strange hunger belonged to no other Grimm she had seen. Speaking quietly to Cinder, Glynda assured, “I can feel it. It’s almost here.” And Cinder whispered: “That’s not him.”

OH BOY LET'S OPEN THIS DOOR

Her heart was jackhammering in her chest, her soul quivering at the proximity—everything in her being screamed to run away, to run until she couldn’t breathe—there!

i'll be the first to confess that i don't remember what we have or have not covered in this version of offal hunt so i will play it safe, as ever, and post only this: 👈😎👈

As she stared, petrified, the Grimm opened its maw. Rows and rows of teeth, each at least as long as her leg, glinted dully in the rain. A warm, golden light pooled at the back of the Grimm’s throat, as though the storm was breaking in front of their eyes—Glynda saw the impossible sun rising in the Grimm’s throat, burning, blinding, and Cinder suddenly yanked her away. The pull on her arm was strong enough to hurt, and she stumbled after Cinder as she pulled them both towards the edge of the island.

HERE WE GO BABEY HELL YEAH HELL YEAH WELCOME TO DA STAGE big chongus among us THE LOVE OF MY *inhales* LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIFE

Molten fire rained down, through the platform—no, no, Glynda blinked, the platform was gone entirely. The platform came down around them as they fell, in a thousand broken pieces, and Glynda could see the unmistakable forms of other bodies twisting through the air—dead or alive, she couldn’t tell.

did sienna just straight up take the biggest L. if so: rip queen you were a milf to the end,

A furious roar from above pierced some ancient nerve in her, lancing through her very soul: the Manticore had only ever been an echo of this feeling, and for the first time in decades, Glynda’s response was not hunger. It was not the hunt that called her. This was fear incarnate.

AND NOW! WE! ARE! COOKING! WITH! GAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hell YES

oh MAN what a return to this huh. what a TIME we have had. i cant say shit lest i say something i shouldnt (yet) but OHOHOHOHO this is about to get VERY sexy VERY fast (actual sexiness may vary according to taste). that said. how yall gonna get outta this one huh...

thanks u diesel and kc for this good food i owe u £20 and a big mac each sdfghjdsghj

[shes-fast-like-me]

heres some thoughts after having to main like 5 diff legends for the past two days in order to gain just under 30 bp levels

bloodhound is the same as theyve always been. theyre decent theyre good if u get good with them i still have anxiety playing them but this time its becus i know Too much info abt my surroundings whereas when i dont play them at least im not worrying abt the footsteps being 20 seconds old and not being able to tell which way the enemy went or where they are. i prefer ignorance but at least their abilities are useful

fusey boyyy i love fuse except no i dont like the fact that u literally cant run away with him i was way better with him when kc was in rotation so im gonna blame the maps for being too open n not allowing his abilities to flourish also again he has no runaway ability and i rlly struggle cus if i dont knock my enemies with his abilities then like /shrug im dead ig otherwise he's good

why did no one tell me horizon is good actually. no idea how to use her ultimate, tactical is very fun its essentially a vertical jumppad very cool. still no idea how to use that ultimate tho its ok i rarely ever use oct's or bh's ults either so thats not like a deal breaker for me

mirage mains 🤝 octane mains: having the most useless character as their main for like half of this series until they got fixed. mirage is only good becus im good with octane change my mind. i just know how to dodge bullets n when to use the tactical to distract. ult is v good tho it saved my ass multiple times

RAMPART IS GOOD N SLEPT ON. she lowkey sucks on olympus but i just dont like olympus for camping legends so thats the real problem not her. shes AMAZING for arenas. i actually rlly like her abilities shes like an aggressive wattson and i already play wattson aggressively so this is right up my alley. honestly considering making her my third main we'll see tho if my mind changes lol

valkyrie is good becus she flies which is essentially horizon's tactical except its her passive n i think thats pog. ult is good to reposition quick, i lowkey hate the lil trackers she has when she glides theyre v distracting but ik thats the point but i still hate them lol shes v good tho i like her a lot

n those are all the legends i was forced to main while grinding the battlepass becus i refused to play loba and bangalore lmfao

[notalittlebutalottie]

hiiii its me poppin in to ask q's <3 : c, d ( pk ), i, r, u, x

🥰🥰 For you, Kait, I will answer anything (except spoilers for PK)

C: What character do you identify with most?

On TVD, probably Caroline but I think she is (ignoring post season 4/5) the most relatable to most women. She and I have a shared neuroticism, love of organisation and control. However, according to a google search, I have the same personality type as Bonnie (INFJ - though I’m more Ambivert than either I or E) which makes a lot of sense to me but they really never brought out her full potential so I think it would be hard for anyone to fully identify. In the broader world of fiction, though, I’m Lisa Simpson. My mum says it all the time and even that one test puts me as highest correlated with her.

D: Is there a song or a playlist to associate with Psychedelic Kicks?

It’s called To The Beautiful You (아름다운 그대에게) and it’s by Wonder Girls. It’s the reason this fic even exists and the last official release of my first ever K-Pop artist (I’m fine, everything is fine 😫). I made a fake playlist for it though here ✨

I: Do you have a guilty pleasure in fic (reading or writing)?

I really enjoy just the almost moments and there’s plenty of them in PK but it’s so fun to write it like I know all the readers will be suffering but it’s just...the d r a m a

R: Are there any writers (fanfic or otherwise) you consider an influence?

@she-walked-away (Unexpected Exposure + Dirty Little Secret) @galvanizedfriend (We’ll Always Have New Orleans) @supernutellastuff (Picturesque) are definitely the most influential simply because a year ago almost to the very day, I had been considering deleting this account but reading and re-reading (in the case of she-walked-away’s stories) their fics really inspired me to return to writing. It’s crazy to think that if not for them, would I be writing right now? I went through a hiatus that was almost 2 years and I just kinda disappeared and I didn’t write more than a couple thousand words and now this year alone, I’ve written near 200,000 words. So a big thank you is in order for them ❤️

U: Share three of your favorite fic writers and why you like them so much.

I’m just going to gush more about the three already mentioned:

she-walked-away: This writer is just a master at making drama come to life. It never feels forced or over the top and the dialogue revolving conflict feels so natural and realistic. I have read Dirty Little Secret...too many times just because it is such an easy, enjoyable read. I can read it in one day and be like well, ok let’s go back to the beginning and start again! Unexpected Exposure, is my favourite, however. I don’t read it often but it’s because when I do, I really like to savour every single scene. I always bring it up, but there’s this scene where they’re in a club dancing with each other and the sexual chemistry is just through the freaking roof! This could be a non-KC story and I would still regard it as a favourite.

galvanizedfriend: I found this story in the tumblr tags last year. I had finished classes a month before I was set to go home so I had a lot of free time and just ended up re-reading a bunch of fics. When I finished all my usual favourites, I looked in the tumblr tags and stumbled upon We’ll Always Have New Orleans. I am such a picky reader ESPECIALLY when it comes to dialogue and tended to prefer human AUs over canon-divergent stories but this story just blew me away (and now here I am, writing a canon-divergent story). Yokan writes so beautifully and I am in awe of how much she can write in such little time with such quality. The story isn’t available any longer and I will always respect her decision to make it so but from all that I can recall, the characterisation was just wonderful. (spoilers) It honestly broke my heart when they reunite and there’s just the gut-wrenching realisation that for her it had been a day or so but for him it had been like 3 months. I CANNOT EXPRESS THE LEVEL OF GUILT I FELT VICARIOUSLY THROUGH CAROLINE. Heartbreak aside, the romance is so fucking gorgeous and well-built, never forced, always well-timed.

supernutellastuff: I, like Yokan’s story, found Picturesque when I was done re-reading my usuals and I think I found it on a klarolinemagazine list for friends with benefits. This was a story that literally had me like ????? how had I never seen this story before?????? Like I said, I’m picky as fuuuuck and I just fell into this story and it swallowed me whole. The friendships in this story really make it come to life and the first scene (spoilers) where Klaus and Caroline are smoking together, and he’s like well it’ll just be us two left - I SCREAM the chemistry was already overflowing. This story builds upon their relationship gradually and it really feels like two freaking adults in a weird entanglement. It’s not filled with random plot twists and it’s not so true to life that it becomes boring, it is just the perfect balance.

X: A character you enjoy making suffer.

There isn’t really any one character in particular (Damon cough) but I kind of enjoy making them all suffer in some way but mainly because it’s I know the reader will suffer? And if that’s not sadistic, I don’t know what is lmao

[archiveofidentityconstellations]

cass won't share her cheese nibs and bruce doesn't love me and i think?? that i deserve better??? than this???? i'm moving to alaska where NO ONE CAN TELL ME WHAT TO DO

the sequel to that one trix yogurt fic

I feel like I should tell you that I am MASSIVELY fucked up right now 

 like i am such a garbage heap that oscar the grouch took a look at me and said 

 “fuckk off!! i have standards!” 

anyways

it’s Brimothy, bitch

what is UP mothertrucksrs it is Me i am back here to write a report on the UNBELIEVABLE SHIT I JUST HANDLED.

okay so u know how Gotham city is on crack cocaine all the time. with like some LSD and heroin and never ever any weed except for like who is that pig guy?? nevrm he doesn’t have weeeed but like he is definitely a Pig. what the fuck is his name. what the fuck.

 okay so anyways 

 is it Goyle

 Doyle

 Pigoyle 

 tin foil? lmao

OKAY FUCK anyways the City, who Also May Be My Lover, is in a constant life crisis (which i relate? a Lot) and do you want to know this s h i t

Crocodile

Killer Croc

who Steve Irwin would be v disappointed in

Is climbing

into people’s FUCKING TOILETS

???????????????

THIS ISN’T FLORIDA

THIS IS NEW JERSEY

WE WEAR SHOES IN THE WINTER

WHAT SORT OF FLIP-FLOP WEARING CUCKER DOES HE THINK HE IS

okay so obviously KC is a big guy. a Dude. a whack-o whaler of a Male. a Big Boh. the largest banananana in the pack. he is Big. so he cAn’t fit into most people’s toilets. he can, however, fit into Big People’s toilets (big as in wealthy, not As in Tom Hanks)

so KC (crispy,,,nuggest…i wonder if fried alligator is good—not that im thinking of eating him, though someone really should threaten him with cannibalism, like if you’re going to be a bitch about it then you deserve the same done to you, it’s just manners) is in cahoots and canoodles with Someone Who Shall Not Be Named (not bc i don’t know, I do, that’s how detectives work. it’s my JOB to know, and i was a prodigy) but bc there is a whole other report detailing this person and their movements and its case file #4461 if u don’t believe me, but i ain’t no snitch, but i will say that tonight’s events connect to file #4461 so Dad if you’re reading this you should already have it out bc it’s your JOB

speaking of jobs ding ding here is mine coming round the mountain as she comes bc the apple bottom jeans the boots with the fur will be coming round the mountain when she comes shE’ll be coming round the mountain she’ll be coming round the mountain she’ll b e coming round and getting low low low low low l ow low

It was a crisp October night. The sun was blinking its sleepy lids, setting the ballroom with an incandescent glow. Bruce Wayne strode across the floor, his daughter Cassandra accompanying him. They wore matching expressions that the privileged always wear: guarded, yet hungry. Hungry for what? Probably for the crab cakes just out of reach. Neither of them had an allergy, and Cassandra in particular had a propensity to shove anything edible in her mouth, so it really was a tragedy that those crab cakes were all the way across the room. There should really be a table right in the middle of the dance floor just for snacks. That way caterers wouldn’t have to do so much leg work, which is actually a good thing, because that ballroom floor is slippery af. This narrator should know, he has Died A Few Times getting there. Suddenly, the night’s festivities were interrupted by a social faux pas: a scream.

You don’t just scream at regular parties, it’s uncouth and hysterical. But you can scream if the social boundaries have already been crossed, and boy, were they crossed.

You see, Dear Reader, there was a man in the toilet.

I use the term “man” loosely, as his glaring yellow eyes do wonders when you might just crap your pantaloons. You start imagining things, like dinosaurs whcih i am personally a big fan of bc Jurassic Park has a kid named Tim in it and I am also Tim.

 hI y is our toilet so big that Killer Croc could wiggle his way up? also how long can he hold his breath. 

 it seems to be impressively long

 hey Bdad how long can he hold his breath? please let me know if you can, and if you won’t i will eat all your wafers becauzs i wa

Mrs. Trenton screamed and fled the impertinent bathroom guest, who wasted no time in ripping the commode to pieces. There was a roar and all the guests paused, unsure if it was merely pipe problems or if they were under attack.

Reader: They were, in fact, under attack. 

The guests, deciding that Mrs. Trenton was a social entrepreneur, followed her lead and began to scream. Killer Croc had made it to ballroom, standing at an impressive height just outside the doors.

He was Not wearing a shirt.

okay have u ever noticed that Killer Crog hasn’t got any nipples????? where are they? he’s got pecs but no nipples?? 

where did they go where are his nip nops i kno people don’t like to think about this but i hAve wondered since i was like 13 like where did they go. has anyone ever asked him. 

did they fall off

“Take the crab cakes!” shouted Matthew Fielder, a lil bitch.

“No, take me!” said Cassandra Wayne, who would literally rather die than give up those crab cakes.

Killer Croc paid them no heed. He desired one thing and one thing only, the sweet satisfaction for his carnal craving: Humain Flesh.

(alliteration hell yeah hell yeah take that Mrs. Johnson i do know shit and im creative as well u jusy don’t know how my brian works it’s like a golden goose egg trap ye ye ye)

 i just Realized 

 i am…a high school drop out

 i don’t know why im doing this

Dear Reader, as an Aside: Smoking can lead to many health issues, especially if one begins smoking at a young age. Harmful side effects include increased risk of stroke and brain damage; muscular degeneration, eye cataracts; cancer of lips, nose, tongue, and mouth, and nipple loss.

 Jason you may want to have a talk with you and your mipples

The terror in the air was stifling. Cannibalism conduct was not something conveyed in etiquette classes. Rich people never expect to be eaten.

Reader, everyone hardly breathed. Something deeply primal had occurred. 

From the doorway the golden eyes struck. Deadly. Lethal. Hungry. 

This was more than vengeance. It was a sadistic occasion of play.

  okay good thing Dames wasn’t there because he fucking HATES KC he gets all huffy and shrieky about him like “he’s a HYGIENE PROBLEM” and it’s like,,,,,.ur right but i don’t want to agree with you because where do we stand if i do that?? as brothers???

 i think the fuck not 

anyways i just realized i’ve been calling Waylon Jones KC the entire damn time (NEWSFLASH ASSHOLE) but to be fucking h, he wants to to be called that. i called him Allen once and he was so PISSED so i can only think of actually calling him by his name. he wouldn’t even be chill with me naming the sewer alligators even tho they were awesome names. i called one Dundee. that’s fucking genius. that’s just. i’m fucking amazing. stupenous. and unappreciated.

 maybe his nipples fell off because he swims in shit every night?????

 question: why do i swim in shit almost as often 

 what the dfck

 what are my life choices

 i feel like there should have been some fine print involved here 

 “Robin duties include scraping shit off your asschreks 3 times a week”

 mahbe,,,,maybe not what i want 

 personal choice

though i haven’t really seen any alligators in the sewers for years now, which is

oh my god OH MY GOD HE ATE THEM  HE ATE THEM OH MY GOD  OH MY GOD !!!!!!!!!!

HE FUCKING  HE FUCKING. HE. HE ATE HIMSELF  HE FUCNING ATE HIMAELF AND HIS FAMILY HIS COUSINS HIS CPOUSINS  HIS FAMILY OH MY GOD  THIS IS LIKE MY 8TH GRADE GRADUATION ALL OVER AGAIN

im so disturbed……..i like, need to eat something. Fucking hell. this Not what i had in mind when i decided to be alive.

i feel like as if i woke up one day and i was the only one in the entire world who remembered Caillou. also could pull off my face and eat it like taffy. imw so. i.

mom i know i refused to go to Shabbat when i was ten so i don’t get to say this but:

this is Not kosher 

oh heyy i want some pIckes

i was also thinking of takin a spin class?? like fuck it i like to bike. fuck it. and maybe iwdont want bruce and nigtwink fucking watxhing me with their beady eyes. like get those off my calves. my cleavage is up here, gentlemen. stop talking about proper form. some people can do things and suck at them. i’m never going to be like a professional ice curler. and i shouldn’t feel bad about that. who the fuck curls for fun. maybe Canada???????

note to self: look up the history of the sport of curling 

i’m going to get good at it to piss off Jason

Back On Topic:

Killer Croc took a step forward. His mouth trembled, watering in anticipation. He took another step.

Mrs. Trenton drew in a breath. 

The room was silent. 

Far across the room, Bruce Wayne clenched his champagne glass. Cassandra Wayne stopped chewing the crab cakes.  Reader, I won’t mince words: Waylon Jones crossed the threshold.

  and the instant he put his foot down on the ballroom floor he fucking slipped like a drunkass toddler

like when Damian is really really tired bc he’s like 2 years old (only an evil 2 years old like chucky) and Jason tries to give him a high five 

gremlin still doesn’t get that “down low” precedes “too slow” 

and he like. faceplants

onto the fucking concrete 

and then Bruce yells at Jason 

and then Jason yells back

“I NEVER ASKED FOR SIBLINGS”

like it was something we all did, like wrote it down on our batmas lists for Brucie Claus 

and im sitting there, a perennial Forgotten Middle Child

and Damian is like still. on the ground.

anyways KC is just slipping across the ballroom, slippering and sliding bc the floor was just waxed and it’s silent except for the wet slaps of his feet against the floor and the screech his tail makes every time he trips (sort of like this) and when he sometimes falls it makes that sound of when your thighs SLAP against the mats and it sounds like a wet walrus coming to cheer you on while a Giant simultaneously swallows a liquid-filled gummy worm down his throat like QAWAGGHHHHHHH only his falls reverberated against the ceiling panels and the cherubs looked down in like. disgust.

Cass began chewing the crab cakes again by the time Killer Croc fell for the twelfth time so idk it was an embarrassing situation

 we all did that Thing people do when a social barrier is breached 

 we like…..avoided each other’s eyes and made light conversation 

 meanwhile Killer Croc’s body screeched in the background

anyways Matthew Fielder was like “so I hear you dance ballet” and Cass responded “uh huh. tap too” and the chewed up crab cake crumbs fell out of her mouth and onto the floor

 i CAN’T

scrambled cock on a cracker, Cass why does Alfred let this happen????? what is this??????  like she can snort creme puffs like cocaine but GOD FORBID i put my elbows on the table and call damian “a poisonous little bitch” because he ate my croutons

 the standards in this family are unbelievable

So everyone is just talking and Mrs. Trenton is sipping champagne now and Luis Alvarez is doing that thing where he starts trying to eat caviar one teeny tiny egg at a time and KC is just like WHUMPH for the thirtieth time

finally dad takes pity on him and crouches down and is like “hey how you doing slugger” which???? Offended me. Very Much.

that’s MY nickname 

has Waylon No-Nipples Jones been adopted by Bruce Wayne??? has Waylon No-Nipples Jones retrieved HIS sorry ass from time?? i don’t fucking think so 

the audacity of this man

but before Killer Croc can reply

Red Hood

BURSTS INTO THE ROOM

guns out, voice modulator kind of fuzzy like a broke refrigerator that makes an “eeeeeeeeeee” sound ever since i tripped over it and fell on it

 which wASN’T MY FAULT 

 IM NOT “deformed baby zebra clumsy” FUCK YOU JASON 

 MAYBE HE SHOULDN’T KEEP HIS EXPENSIVE HELMET ON THE FLOOR THEN 

 you know what? I’m GLAD i tripped over it.

 yeah. suck it. 

 im glad you sound like a 90s japanese transistor radio 

 off brand too

 fuck you 

 I GOT A BRUISE NOT THAT ANYONE CARES 

 even Bruce was like “hey tim you need to watch where you’re going”

 ???

 how about YOU watch where YOU’RE GOING 

 “where” as in TIME TRAVEL 

 REMEMBER THAT BRUCE 

 REMEMBER THAT?!???????

 HUH BIG GUY?!???????!!???

 no one is allowed to criticize me from now on

 i am Above Reproach 

    anyways yeah Red Hood appears at the party and shoots KC and Bruce was like “why the FUCK would you SHOOT HIM” as if he has some misplaced paternal feeling for Waylon No-Nipples Jones because he called him slugger which is something he calls one of his other kids but whatever im not bitter im just insecure and sad all the time but don’t worry about it maybe i’ll die one day and you’ll all be sorry especially about Certain Things like not sharing cheese nibs huh Cassandra

so RH and Bruce Wayne kind of argue. like. literally sniping at each other bc SOMEBODY forgot that Red Hood is a criminal and not their misplaced son and RH is like “it’s!!!!! a tranquilizer!!!!! ya big hoe!!!!!” only he doesn’t really say it like that but everyone isn’t even listening at this point because this party has already been so goddamn weird and we’re all suffering from secondhand embarrassment

i am Assuming,,,,,that Killer Croc Jones “Jonsie No-Nipples” has been taken away to be put into jail and studied for his non-nipple properties but at this point i’ve been sitting here huffing that cold medicine or whatever Bruce gave me. which

 oh yeah i was crushed earlier 

 it was by “slugger” but whatever

 yeah his body broke mine 

 it was because Bruce and Jason were fighting again and not paying attention so 

 KC was tranquillized and like 

 fell on me 

 he drooled on me too 

 those ballroom floors really hurt 

 like my head feels like mush 

 Alfred’s oatmeal 

 on its second day 

 because i refused to eat it on the first day 

 that man has a spine of Steel and he Does Not Let You Waste Food 

 btw he fell on me because i pushed Luis Alvarez out of the way 

 he was really transfixed by those tiny fish eggs 

 it’s fun to put them on your tongue and let them like slide around 

 so i pushed him out of the way and was promptly crushed to death 

 B said something about a broken collarbone 

 i am more worried about a broken butt 

 fuck

 my coccyx

PROFESSOR PYM wait no shit that’s a comic book character

anyways my butt is broken and im hungry and dad wouldn’t let me get out of the chair so i write up this report because I am A Real Life Detective and I do my JOB

once again im the best

hey red jood can you get me some cheese nibs cassandrA won’t share which is p mean especially since i was all for being eaten to give her those crab cakes  red hoof red  why isn’t he responding to me i want xheese nibs red hanz  red  red  Red Hood please I require sustenance  red fhau red gjji red hhood ted joood redb hood red red edds red red edd dedd red red red red red wd red  what the fuck what a right bastard sometimes oh hi Badaman

EDIT: His name is “Pyg.”  Fucking. Pyg. Points taken off for unoriginality.

decided to have a tumblr version too ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[kilapsaww]

Confessions of an armchair journalist

MY THIRD article for the day involves a scuffle between President Rodrigo Duterte and Vice President Leni Robredo. The chief executive is insisting to have the latter take charge of his anti-drug campaign. The veep, backed by her vocal supporters, takes time to accept the random offer. If her retaliation was quicker and had read something like, “Bring it on,” there would be less room for the DDS to call her “duwag,” “tamad,” “Leni lugaw,” et cetera. I weave together the statements of the two highest officials of the land while munching on some stale pan de sal at my office in Mandaluyong.

I could call it a day except I am running late to a story conference for my other job. I prepared more than five story proposals just in case my executive producer comes in late again: Brexit delays, Trump’s looming impeachment, the Hong Kong turmoil, the simultaneous unrests in Chile, Lebanon, and Bolivia, and the deadly earthquakes that jolted parts of the Philippines just so I could squeeze in my corner of the world to the weekly global newscast I produce for.

I should be going home after securing my story assignments for the show, but I have so far pleased only three out of four bosses. That’s how my Wednesdays go: I cry a river of digital content while producing a morning talk show, scour for raw news clips from the Associated Press’s video bank, and then play a virtual tug-of-war on Viber with my anchor for a radio show that airs on Saturdays. Sometimes I wonder how I get things done and still manage to sleep, and then I remember I am just in the comforts of a dim-lit, airconditioned, rumored-to-be-close-to-bankruptcy office.

The jobs I juggle as a fresh graduate are a stark contrast from what I envisioned. While close to a thousand students belted the university hymn on our graduation day, I was busy daydreaming of seeing my byline on any of the three major dailies in the country. I have always wanted to become a print journalist. It was probably an inherited interest from my father, who unfortunately died too early to stop me from walking the same dangerous path he did. But I had constantly convinced myself that the mole on my right foot meant the Lord had pre-assigned me to scrape the field for exclusive stories, except my mother would say it only symbolized my being “layas.”

I left the office just before the sun flirted with the gigantic “M” that points to McDonald’s. My condo unit is just roughly 100 steps from the fast food chain. I got myself some burger and fries before proceeding to the dilapidated building I call home.

“Wahaha di mo kc kaya LENI LUGAW.. BBM is real vp..”

“Kapag hindi effective ang war on drugs ibig sabihin di ito umepekto XD di b Leni Lugaw?”

“Tatay digong we love u here from Saudi.. ”

My article this morning has so far lured some two hundred comments, most of them written by seemingly the same person. I would educate all of them about ad hominem, or at least how to type like a human being, but that would be beyond my pay grade. I devoured my evil combination of a meal and then browsed further into the deepest parts of my company’s Facebook page. By deepest I mean the troll department, or the comment section, or the wrestling ring where Duterte devotees, the dilawans, and those neither make the most of their internet connections defending their political patron saints. I scanned the whole thing, made faces, then decided to call it a day.

***

I came unusually early for the feature talk show I write for the next day. It was one of the few episodes we tackled something newsy, hence close to my heart. We had a former Agriculture secretary clashing with the department’s current spokesman. I have been writing about rice farmers’ plight under the heavily-criticized rice liberalization law for months now. After the hour-long banter, my anchor proceeded to pooling his staff together to talk about the story outlook for the week. No praise, or at least mention, of this morning’s newsy episode. I do not think my anchor is journalist enough.

But neither am I.

Early into college, I encountered the term “armchair journalism” from my news writing professor, who was probably the most grumpy and aggressive person to introduce the term to aspiring newsmen like me. He passionately bashed the practice, saying journalists should not be labeled one sans direct interaction with sources, or the scorching heat in the field, or the slim chance of exhausting an exclusive off pressers in this era of pack journalism. It was among the few lectures that stuck to me after graduation, precisely because I had vowed to dodge it the best way I could. Except here I am now—writing hundreds of stories without meeting my sources in flesh.

Do not get me wrong, I am all for the upgraded accessibility and convenience courtesy of the fast-changing media landscape. Plus, my current job definitely puts food on the table. But although I am always just a bold decision away from taking on a fieldwork, I dread the lack of financial safety net that everyone—literally everyone in the print industry I am friends with right now—has been warning me about. After all, journalism is public service. What matters most is how it drives a society into acting on pressing issues.

I dressed up the last few paragraphs of my article on the Duterte-initiated drug war’s new czar, pacified my radio anchor who kept insisting his Tokyo car show tour was newsy, updated my LinkedIn profile, then took the last sip of my Starbucks staple.

[somar78]

The New Kevin Dunworth Harley-Davidson Sportster Street Tracker

This is probably the most interesting street tracker we’ve ever featured. If you’re skeptical take a closer look at that front and rear suspension. The bike started out humbly with a 1200cc V-twin literally stolen from his wife’s Sportster and am old frame gifted to Kevin from a close friend.

Thankfully his wife now has a new engine, and she’s talking to Kevin again after some much deserved silent treatment.

The Harley-Davidson Sportster is a motorcycle that was always destined to be turned into a street tracker, the fact that the company haven’t released a half-decent factory street tracker of their own is a bewildering oversight that’s doubtless cost them significant potential sales.

After saying that I’m guaranteed to get angry emails from XR1200 owners, but in my opinion after riding a couple of them – they’re good bikes in their own way but they’re not really street trackers. I’ve always felt that street trackers should be lightweight, raucous, chuckable, and borderline illegal. Kind of like a road-registered XR750 with blinkers.

Kevin Dunworth

Kevin has become a significant figure in both the American and global custom motorcycle scenes. From an engineering perspective he’s created some of the most fascinating builds in recent memory, including an aerospace alloy plate-framed custom Triumph.

Kevin’s builds have appeared in many of the world’s foremost motorcycle magazines and websites – including Silodrome. He’s made multiple appearances on television with Esquire Network’s “Wrench Against the Machine” and Discovery Channel’s “Naked Speed”.

Kevin was formerly the founder of Loaded Gun Customs, but he decided to shutdown LGC and shift his attention to his own new enterprise – Dunworth_

Dunworth Custom Harley-Davidson Sportster Street Tracker

Instead of writing the story of this build out myself I’m now going to turn it over to Kevin to explain it in his own words:

I’m Kevin Dunworth. I live and breathe motorcycles and cars, though I’m mainly known for motorcycles. This was a bike I wanted to build to prove the Sportster platform was just plain fun. I had a rather dramatic injury recently and I’ve been going through some rehab as well as multiple surgeries. I had to close my previous business and was floundering a bit mentally with many things.

I had a candid conversation about going to The Handbuilt Show 2018 yet had not been able to really do anything since the previous November due to my accident. A friend and brother-from-another-mother “Lubo” from the Slovak Republic basically called and said in his uniquely accented english “stop feeling sorry for yourself, I be over in couple weeks we working” I knew he wasn’t kidding. We’d worked together multiple times over the years on contracts together and he was a machine – a few years ago I literally shut the power off to the building pretending it was a power outage, after about 50 hours of non-stop working to get him to sleep.

I was figured it was time to build this bike.

I spoke with a friend a S&S Engines next and mentioned my idea and the goal to debut at the Handbuilt Show 2018. He hooked me up with a guy named Kevin Boarts, Kevin is an engine genius at S&S, we immediately hit it off – he knew what I was looking for in a high revving, high compression, high horsepower, and barely streetable engine.

I then had to break the news to KC, my helper in the shop, that his days of hanging out with his feet up “watching the shop” would be coming to an abrupt end. KC has worked with both Lubo and I on and off for 12 years, and the anxiety of me and Lubo alone with a deadline showed immediately in his eyes. He’s like a surgeon’s assistant and utterly invaluable during crunch times, he literally runs for tools and keeps the tourists that frequently visit the shop from thinking we are unsociable jerks by being kind to them and showing them around.

The goal with this build was to create a Hot Rod motorcycle. Something that could go to a track day, do a back road run, go drag racing for fun, and sit at a bike night and wow people who know what they are looking at (many “biker” types just see a Sportster as a “girls bike”) I love Singer Porche.

I love Richard Pollock from Mule Motorcycles builds. I knew from a late 90’s Cycle World cover of a bike Richard built with a balsa wood tail section that had the profile I wanted. I wanted brakes and wheels to attract a performance guy or racer. Sadly the bike never made the Handbuilt Show – but it went on to be part of the Bell Power Sports Eliminator Helmet campaign with a catalog shoot, and it debuted at The Galveston Bike Week Show with an invite from Cycle Source magazine to compete in the In Motion Show.

The Build Process

I had a Kawasaki ZX7R front end and resprung it using Race Tech parts, I took the stock lower triple and removed the neck tube. Using 1” cro-moly tubing I machined a simple adapter and pressed it back in. I had a top triple clamp that would allow 11/8” Renthal bars to be installed. This allowed me to cut the stem to length and use stock Harley tapered bearings from All Balls. Using the offset of the triple trees and OD of wheels I did the math for proper trail. I came up with compromise of 24.5 degree head tube angle to get me about 102mm of trail. I then basically tilt the frame forward to achieve this.

I then (directly behind engine mounts) cut the back half of the frame off. I removed the tubing at the top tube and painstakingly welded and sanded so that it would look like a perfect single tube. We then took a piece of mild steel tubing and tapped both ends 3/8th-16 at 2” long. Drilling through the top tube a couple inches behind the rear tank mount I inserted and welded this mount for the rear sub frame.

From bar stock I machined some inserts for the lower tubes and welded some pre made tabs I received from TC Brothers. The Saddlemen Fiberglass tail came with a metal seat hoop. I removed their end caps and machined inserts to except heim joints at the front. We reinforced the back and made it straight and welded prefabbed 3/8th tabs to the back. Then using a tube bender we took ¾” tubing and bent slight angle to follow what would have been factory angles to finish struts. These use prefabbed tube ends 5/16” and solid connectors.

To the oil tank mounted in the front which is an idea I first saw done by MobTown Cycles out of Dundalk, MD. Tim Snead taught me a bunch of little tricks and this is one I have used a bunch, my version is to use pre-bent exhaust tubing. A U-bend. I cut the pipe in half laterally and make 2 sheets to fit using the outside of the pipe.

This gives me a rounded 1 ¾” thick tank once welded in. Using weld in -6AN male fittings allows me to use AN fittings for my oil lines. A race car coolant cap weld-in kit is used for the oil filler off to the right side. Using two bungs welded and braced I drill out the stock frame existing tabs and mount it in front of the front down tubes.

It also houses a battery box in the bottom for a lithium-ion battery, this particular version allows for 2.5 quarts of oil in the system, and being steel and mounted to the front I think helps in cooling.

We made a drop pan between the seat frame rails for a motogadget m-unit. I also made a rear tail light set-up using two of the Kim Boyle (from Boyle Custom) moto rear tail lights. With motogadget I run these as run, brake and blinkers. I made a cro-moly rear swing arm using 65 wall square tubing, and ran a tube frame Buell underslung reverse-pull shock absorber.

It was tricky getting shock right and after a lot of math the team at Race Tech re-sprung it, extended the remote reservoir, and re-valved a works shock I had laying around. I used pre-bent header tubes from Cone Engineering. Then I stepped up the diameter at determined length (Rich at Cone is another genius) and used a 2-into-1 collector to 2.5”. We then used a Big Mouth Muffler 2.5” inlet from Cone, all stainless of course.

If you’d like to see more of Kevin’s work or contact him about building you a custom, you can click here to visit his official Instagram.

The post The New Kevin Dunworth Harley-Davidson Sportster Street Tracker appeared first on Silodrome.

source https://silodrome.com/harley-davidson-sportster-street-tracker-motorcycle/

[princecardan]

What made you fall in love with the Red Queen series? Like which characters you love, or amazing fight scenes?

i love a good plot twist and rq is full of them- so i guess that’s what drew me in initially. ESPECIALLY when the plot twist is so well thought out that little clues were sprinkled in throughout the entire book, so that when u reread you start noticing things and you’re like, “how did I not see this before????”

example: kc, the epilogue seems so obvious now, looking back at Cal’s arc and his actions in kc. but we were all DISTRACTED with Maven’s sob story and the marecal fluff.

that takes some damn good planning if u ask me

i also like how a lot the characters aren’t traditional ya tropes, and they’re all very flawed. i’ll admit, first book to me seemed a tropey, but it’s become its own story as it’s gone on. the books just seem to be getting better and better imo.

also i’m so confused how i can ship marecal and not ship it and hate maven but feel sorry for him, there’s so much depth to the main characters and everything is so subjective. nothing is totally good and nothing is totally bad, except elara and obviously the red discrimination but other than that,,,

this got really long wow woops

[luvleekaotix-imagines]

KC’s Kingsman: The Golden Circle AU fix

Spoilers obviously.

In which everyone fucking lives because fuck you movie. Anything I write on this blog regarding Kingsman will be in the AU below because fuck, I said I’d fucking fix it.

Same plot, except:

Missiles are fired at Kingsman HQ’s, but since they’re so fucking high tech, they know they’re coming with just enough time to get the fuck out even if they lose everything.

Doomsday protocol is still activated or whatever because the Kingsman figure ‘well shit its better if these villains think we’re dead anyway, so why not?’

Roxy just watches Merlin and Eggsy get shitfaced with the old whiskey in the safe while sipping on her share. She’s watching with absolute interest and thinking ‘and men think women get hysterical with emotion at work’. She’s also the one that notices the Kingsman symbol on the bottle's label.

Yadda yadda movie stuff happens and it’s pretty much all the same except Roxy helps a lot because shE DIDN’T GO THROUGH THE FUCKING TESTS AND BECOME LANCEALOT JUST TO DIE IN A FUCKING INSTANT OKAY.

Merlin survives because he’s not a fucking dumbass. They packed to detect mines, you don’t think they packed to disable them iN CASE SHIT HAPPENS? How ‘bout fuck you he’s not a stupid shit and wangle-jangles himself out of a bad situation??? ?? ???

There’s ass kicking with Roxy around. Charlie is dead cause fuck him he tried to kill all of them. He’s a childish, bitter fuck and instead of trying to better himself and learn he just went to get validation for revenge by an equally fucking crazy person. No wonder you didn’t become a Kingsman, you fuck. Roxy is the one to dispose of him and she drops a one-liner that makes the guys think ‘oh damn, son’.

Agent Whiskey isn’t killed, he was an emotional and traumatised fuck. Surprise, surprise. So he’s arrested and detained instead of put into a meat grinder. He’s taken back to Statesman HQ and demoted.

Ginger Ale is promoted to Agent Whiskey because sHE FUCKING DESERVES IT. She and Roxy share a cute little moment in which they complain about how theY HAVE TO CARRY THE REST OF THESE FUCKS ON THEIR FUCKING BACKS NOW.

Champ sends Tequila and former Whiskey off to Kingsman to learn some fuCKIN’ manners because they’re FUCKS and also to build better Kingsman/Statesman relations now that there’s a Statesman scotch thingus in the EU. Merlin figures they better set up a Kingsman tailoring business somewhere in the US because fuck YEAH, expansion!!

THERE. HOW BOUT FUK U MOVIE. I WANTED FUN FIGHT SCENES AND CLEVER DIALOGUE NOT STUPID DEATHS EVERY FUCKING WHERE AND A SHITTY LOVE STORY I DIDN’T FUCKING CARE ABOUT THAT CAME OUT OF THE FUCKING BLUE.

Fuck.

[faunusrights]

OFFAL HUNT REMASTERED LIVEBLOG // CHAPTER 12

GUESS WHO’S BACK. BACK AGAIN. OFFAL’S BACK. TELL A FRIEND.

It’s been a while but everybody knows this was just the buildup to some Peak Nonsense. If you didn’t already know: I’m liveblogging the whole of the new remastered Offal Hunt, and you can find the eleven previous chapters liveblogged somewhere in here. Without further ado, however, let’s just jump right in to the First Fanfic That Ever Made Me Cry, Because It’s Written By Two Literal Hellhounds,

JUST KIDDING I’m gonna very quickly reread my own liveblog of chapter eleven because I forgot what happened. Brb.

Aaaaaaaaaaand it was some gay shit. Back to now.

The bad news is I can’t really recall what has or has not been, like, ~properly revealed~ yet, so I’m gonna err on the side of caution and 👈😎👈* even for things that MIGHT be known because. Look. I don’t remember what happens in my own fanfic let alone someone else’s. Still, ONWARDS.

Their collective appetite was a damp stain on the air itself—shared knowledge that the only thing standing between them and the Witch was time. They lined the cavern like rows of rotted teeth, black and crooked, and Cinder was in the hungry gullet, drenched in bloodlust. 

I KNOW I’ve said it in previous liveblogs but this version of Offal Hunt is very much a visual treat. I mean, it’s of no surprise, but still! It’s also Aesthetically Slappin and is also entirely up my alley, which is why so many of my braincells are even devoted to this whole AU anyway,

Cinder’s teeth were crawling from her gums in a bid to escape, and she bit down to pin them in place.

THE HORROR AESTHETIC!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!! anyway I was warned this prose was nightmarish but good news for y’all I’m Here 4 It.

“Something—” The words were roaches wriggling up her throat. “Something’s wrong with me.” 

You know, wasn’t sure how this chapter was gonna go because we’re slowly starting to lance off the rails in bits and pieces, but OOOOOOOOH I LOVE IT. This writing! This style! Also Cinder what the shit have you done this time.

If she fought Glynda now, she would die, her rotting flesh bursting at the intimation of force.

I’m not gonna keep saying how good this is. But. I’m saying it here. It’s good.

I realised the music I’ve been listening to for this has been entirely too upbeat, so I’ve slapped on the soundtrack to The Witch, because what else am I meant to listen to if not the soundtrack of my favourite horror film of all time? Anyway.

So she meets Glynda in the drizzling rain and it’s all very Atmospheric, if I do say so myself, which this bumper line of feels:

Outside, Glynda lurked just down the incline, more presence than person.

That’s what we call a big oof.

She bit, “What was that? It almost sounded like I didn't deserve to get thrown through a window.”

Cinder, bad news, babe: I think you might just always deserve to get thrown through a window.

It was the first time she had ever seen a Witch so fully entrenched in her own soul.

Hoo. H o o.

It took longer for Glynda to respond than it had before. She looked to be chewing on it, as if trying to force the words into shape within her own mouth. Eventually, she said, “Witches. Where did you hear about them?”

The snare pulled taut. Cinder smiled wearily to herself, privately in the dark.

H  O  O.

I also know I’ve said this before too, but Cinder in this version is just. Hhh. So fascinating. Her internal conflict is absolutely Juicy. Except it’s the overripe sort of juicy that makes you go ‘uh-oh’ when u see it u kno the kind.

Nausea struck her square in the gut, made her legs go weak and tremor-struck, and she staggered back, away from Glynda, bending over herself. She wouldn’t be sick, she’d told herself, she wouldn’t, she wouldn’t—

Did y’all know I have emetophobia? This whole bit ends up being a massive mood because feeling nauseous is Panic Attack Central for me. The more you know!

For a moment, it was as though Cinder didn’t even recognize him. This was someone else. Something else. A nightmare dredged up from dreams and spilled into this world, bleeding every sort of fear at the edges.

You know I haven’t spotted a fingerguns moment yet but I think it’s ‘cause I’m so enthralled by this. Oh my GOD Glynda what did you DO. Also wait. Waaaaaait wait wait.

WAIT OH MY GOD I GET IT NOW. OH MY GOD. MY BRAINCELL CLICKED.

Softly, Cinder asked: “Is this… Do you feel this?” Hati blinked slowly. “Always?” He dipped his head. Cinder’s chest wrenched.

OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OOOOOOOOOOOOOH MY GOD I DUNNO IF-- CAN I-- OKAY I’M JUST GONNA. 👈😎👈 ONLY IT’S MORE LIKE 👈😔👈

Oh my god though holy shit. She’s not sick it’s Glyn-- oh MAN this is SUCH AN IMPROVEMENT I can like. FEEL diesel and kc going ‘wait no wait it should go like this actually’. Of COURSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I feel smarter having literally read this bit for no particular reason. Also this is actually a good like little theory bit abt Stuff that I Can’t Say but. but yeah.

the Witch and the Grimm she was soul-bound to hunt.

Oh okay THERE’S the big 👈👈👈😎👈👈👈 that’s the one babes!!! Can’t say shit but there it is!!!!!!!!!!!

“I know that Grimm.” Grimacing, Cinder said, “Maybe in another life.” Glynda seemed to barely hear. “I’ve dreamed about it. My entire life.”

👈👈👈👈👈👈👈👈👈👈😨👈👈👈👈👈👈👈👈👈

“Come with me,” she said. “I know where to go. There’s someone else who can tell you everything you want to know.” “Her?” [...] She swallowed back bile, cleared her throat, and said: “My mother.” 

WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH MY GOD WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Y’ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Y’ALL ARE WE POPPIN’ THIS CAN OF PRINGLES THIS EARLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The gloves are COMIN’ AWF!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay so this chapter was, how we say in the industry, Very Fucking Good. I didn’t cover absolutely everything that happened ‘cause there’s just So Much even in this small space but so much of this was just. GOOD IT’S GOOD the writing the 👈😎👈s and the everything else!!!!!!!!!!!!! And if anyone reading this is a new reader: hohohoho oh you are, IN FOR IT NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HOOTY HOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*the fingerguns emoji represents a reference to something in the OG version. This is so I don’t spoil stuff for brand new readers.

[jinwoostro-archive]

@iloveparkjisung​ @lanceymccute​

okay so i just got real fuckin emo bc of my last post BECASUE I just remembered how me nd eli first started talking,,,and then i remembered how me nd kc first started talking and it was bc of the freaking gc

ive regretted a lot in my life but applying for that gc was the best fuckin decision of my life, both of u are the longest friends i’ve had on this whole goddamn website. I can’t believe since we started the gc we’ve rlly been talking every single day,,,,do u know how many days that is?? more than 400.. but we never run out of topics to talk about?? tbh we could be talkin bout the same shit for a few days and i still wouldnt get bored of it bc both of u make everything so fun and exciting and both of u make me laugh so much ohmygod. but i’ve also learned a lot from both you, you’ve both made me into a better person, so thank you for that. You’ve made me accept parts of myself i could never have done before and given me confidence in things i never had. Yall are the real hypemen and my life would be so much darker without u two. tbh there’s nothing i wouldnt do for the both of u (except eat slim jims bc they nasty) and jus know that you’re the greatest thing to happen in my life. We’re there for each other, through all the problems we’ve had. (Im sorry bout u guys hearing me rant bout this one person AHEM 👀 but thank u for not getting bored of me.) i could tell u both anything and everything, and i do! you’re the little siblings i have from way across the world and i really do love you both to bits. May we speak to each other forevermore and learn to love ourself and each other more 💛💛💛