#luna is my beloved wife and she means the entire world to me

[emylilas]

Hello there ftws hex recipient,

You listed two ships on the form that you like (Saundreas and Lunrah). I just wanted to know your reasons why you like those particular ones?

Hi there!! 

Sorry it took me the entire day to respond, I had to do a LOT of thinking to give a proper answer. I have to say I was absolutely taken aback when your question came because to me, it was like asking me why I love dark chocolate more than any other type. Since that kind of answer would have been of 0 interest, I had to give it some thought! 

First easy reason is that it’s because they’re adults and I’ve never been invested in teenagers’ drama. It’s always the adults for me, no matter the show, movie, or book! But I believe that the main reason I love these two ships more than others is because we know so little but were given some very interesting bits. When writing, that gives us absolute freedom!  

There’s obviously a very heavy past between Saul and Andreas, and the tensions during the scenes between Luna and Farah can be hint for an equally heavy past between the pair. And I absolutely love the potential it offers! And although, Luna and Farah are my main beloved ship, I love to imagine a world where Saul and Farah are supportive best friends while Luna and Andreas are like chaotic siblings, and the four of them, along with Ben and his wife, live a quite happy life, sometimes getting on each other’s nerves, most of the time teasing each other, always caring for each other. 

Also, I started shipping Luna and Farah BEFORE I actually got to watch Fate and I blame @inlovewithfairies for that (by blame I mean: thank you, I love you, you’re a wonderful writer!). She was just there, feeding my love for both Kate Fleetwood and Eve Best. So, there’s a lot of that. I’m gay, and the show gave me two hot powerful middle-aged women, so what else was I supposed to do than shipping them?  

Finally, there’s also the fact that I’m projecting a lot onto them. I imagine Saul and Andreas as being wonderful dads together, once they’ve sorted out their differences and the whole “I killed you/I burnt your house down” thing, raising Beatrix and Sky. With the four of them, I can imagine tones of cute family moments, some inspired by my own family, like board games and cooking together, and as someone who lives an ocean away from her family, I definitely need that sometimes! Like I said to my dear @penflicks, Saul and Andreas are self-care in a "give me family feels" way. 

Luna and Farah are more self-care in a "I’ll write a painful love between them because there’s sadness in me that I need to take out of my little head” kind of way. But I love to combine the two couples, like a big happy family, with its problems and difficulties, and to heal with them! I guess that’s also why I love writing angst (and I actually have the annoying talent to turn absolutely everything into angst), but I adore reading fluff and happy stuff!  

That was a longer response than I intended to, but I hope it allows you to understand more what I like about them! 

[fitzselfships]

Good night I am currently thinking about her <:]

[trishvaylar]

Whatever it takes

Helen: Are we ever prepared for what tomorrow brings? As an oncology specialist, I am not so sure. Life is so cruel sometimes, but what I know for sure it that life is always worth living. I remember the day, the hour, that moment when I first met Max. He was in such trouble then. Eventually he healed - lived through cancer, through loosing his beloved wife, having to raise Luna on his own.

But he never gave up life, love, for life and for his Daughter, the desire to do infinite good at New Amsterdam, to cure people, to better their lives. He tought me, like some cancer patients who get to be cured and live on, that fighting for life is ingrained in us human beings. We fight for life even when it becomes unbearable...or seems that way looking from the inside. But when looking from the side, so many people who die would do anything to stay alive. Not to rule the world, just to cook dinner for their loved ones, to get up in the mornings to lead their grandchildren to the kindergarden, to live to see their children's weddings and so on.

Max has tought me so much, about loyalty, courage, passion in your own job, about love, and caring, and sacrifice.

So whenever I think about him, remembering everything which happened at New Amsterdam and in our lives since we have known each other, I realize and I accept the simple truth: I want to be with him...whatever it takes.

Max: I remember meeting her for the first time, clashing with her over how oncology department should be run, how my own illness should be treated, how I should reschedule my own life. I realized even then that I met someone special, but I was fighting with myself to prevent admitting just how much she really ment to me then and how indefinitely more she means to me right now.

Georgia's death, Luna, the responsibility of raising her alone, trying to bond with other women, trying to do good by Luna, always by Luna, all those things took their toll, and I tried and tried to find my footing outside the ever stressfull existence of inside New Amsterdam.

I am a doctor, so is Helen. But moreover, she is a fighter, a compassionate and emphatic woman, and a stunningly gorgeous woman! She is!

But her looks are not the reason why - I love her. The real reason are multiple reasons it is very hard for me as a doctor, to put into the right words. Medicine is one thing, love is something else entirely, but both bring us so close to the reevaluating of why we live to loving life, but accept, at the same time, our mortality, and still find in it the infinite goodness of the Universe giving us the ability and the will to love someone.

Helen tought me to hope against hope, to fight another day, to be the best man and doctor I could be.

And in my love for Helen I see a way forward I must take, if I wish to grow as a man, a doctor, a Father, a lover and a friend... Whatever it takes!

Helen: In the name of my love I shall fight for every life I am given the chance to safe, to be worthy, in my eyes, of his love.

Max: In the name of my love I shall fight for every life I am given the chance to safe, to be worthy, in my own eyes, of her love.

They walk together, hand in hand down the halls of New Amsterdam. Another day is given to save lives. Because that is what it takes to do what they are here to do in the name of love - to their patients, to life itself, and to each other.

They are DOCTORS and they are in love with each other! And they shall be together, whatever it takes.

@katarinas-redemption with gratitude for prompting my heart and mind, this is my first Sharpwin NA ff. May it not be the last.

[mzargentum]

Light in the Dark

Due to unfortunate circumstances, I haven’t been able to write in quite some time, but I wouldn’t dare miss my beautiful wife’s, @completelyinappropriate​, birthday. ^^ Over the past few years of knowing her, she’s been nothing less, but an inspiration to me as well as a vessel of undying love and support and there will never been nearly enough time in existence itself to where I could repay her for just being alive. I love you, my dear Momma Six. And Happy Birthday. <3

Warnings: None | OC’s: Six Ulric & Muerlinian Zephyr | Word Count: 887

2 years.

Seemed like decades.

The sun was just a mere memory to most now.

A story to tell children about before they slept.

A myth to all of Eos.

Those who fought to bring light among them knew, but most were still able to keep up the illusion to minimize the tears.

Very few weren’t.

Those few were in the horror that brought this hell among them.

They saw what created the darkness.

Those few pairs of eyes are forever scarred with the forbidden images that started it all...

And yet...they were everyone’s saviors.

“Commander Ulric?”

The exhausted silver eyes of the raven haired glaive rose to meet her fellow hunter.

Glistening beautifully, yet solemn in the moonlight.

“Everyone’s outside waiting for you...”, the young hunter cheerfully gestured with a light bubbly grin. “They’d like to see you at least once before your birthday ends”.

Six looked at the time.

5:38pm.

“You can’t just spend the entire night brooding in here? Isn’t part of a leader’s job to boost morale?”, the hunter jokingly poked. “I mean, it’s not like we couldn’t use that around here”.

It was a joke, but true all the same.

“Heh...don’t worry”, Six finally answered. “There’s plenty of time...I’ll make my way out eventually”.

                                                   _____________

6pm.

7pm.

10:45pm.

She never made it close to the door outside her room.

Why would she?

With all she lost...first her son...

...her king...

...she hasn’t seen her beloved shield in what’s felt like eons and after the death of the Oracle...and the horrific events that took place at Zegnautus Keep, there was no telling what has become of her dear friend...

...her injuries...the pain in her heart. Other than Prompto’s love, all that was brought to her friend that day was sadness...

All that welcomed her out there was a brief illusion that they weren’t surrounded by endless darkness and daemons ready to destroy everything in their raging paths.

With absolutely no end to this madness in sight...

...and they wanted her to celebrate?

11:14pm.

“Tch...right”, Six groaned to herself opening yet another beer. “A real happy birthday to me...”.

“Well, isn’t this a pitiful sight?”

A familiar silky accent fluttered about the silence of the glaive’s room, startling her to choke on her beer.

“Better be glad it’s me here to see this and not the big guy”, the voice chuckled.

“You’ve got to be kidding me...”, Six muffled quietly in between coughs before turning toward her door.

The glaive’s eyes widened into saucers once she saw those all too familiar teal pools, that welcoming toothy smile and those bewitching silver locks.

Despite some minor differences, there was no question about it...

“Muerlin?”

The woman’s cheery expression softened lightly.

“Happy Birthday...Momma Six”.

                                                   ______________

11:38pm.

“I see...”, Muerlin sighed to herself as she took a large swing of beer. “You haven’t seen Gladdy in forever too, huh?”

“Yeah...with so many hunters and so few people to help lead, we’re both way too busy to see each other whenever we’d like to...”, Six explained.

Her heart heavy with sadness.

“Being in charge of an entire city must be hellish for you”, Muerlin sympathized. “Still, can’t say it hasn’t been a slight improvement than training a few jughead glaive’s”.

“You’re right about that”, Six chuckled to herself. “I’m sure what you’ve been dealing with is much worse...traveling all over Eos...healing people and fighting daemons...you’re basically the new Oracle”.

“New Oracle, huh...”, Muerlin softly replied. “Never heard that one before...besides, Luna was...something out of this world. I couldn’t even compare when we were kids...she was the savior, I was the monster that squatted in the palace and ate all of the food”.

She took another heavy gulp.

“Picking fights with Ravus was a casual hobby”.

“I see, so Ravus was just practice for Nyx?”

“Heh”, Muerlin giggled to herself, “oh, that takes me back”, she grinned raising her beer in the arm.

“Our battles were legendary!”

“They were loud, obnoxious and cost a lot of gil in damages”, Six cut in with a light glare.

“Eh, they were only light damages”, the wizard grinned to herself.

“Brat”.

Muerlin giggled to herself before tossing another empty can to her eye growing pile.

“I wonder what they’d say”, she mumbled grabbing another can.

“Hm?”

“All of them...if they were here”.

“...I really don’t know. It’s been so long...”, the woman scratches the back of her head, “I really can’t imagine it”.

“Gladio will think your pixie cut is cute”.

A hard cough from Six’s beer sends the stingy liquid spilling from her nose.

“What? That’s what you were worrying about just now, wasn’t it?”, Muerlin playfully asks.

“You’re such a bitch”, Six glared toward her friend, her cheeks flushed in light embarrassment.

“You missed me”.

Muerlin’s mischievous toothy grin warming the glaive’s spirits despite her irritation. 

It brought back such wonderful memories. Reminding her of happier times.

“Muerlin...”, Six smiles after cleaning her face.

“Hm?”

“Thank you...for coming to see me today”.

Muerlin stared at her dear friend for a moment in silence. This sensation was unfamiliar.

The view of Six’s gaze was sincere and warm.

Her smile was so genuine and...

....HAPPY???

“BEGONE, DAEMON SCUM!!!”

Just like old times.

“Jackass”.

                                                   ______________

A/N: More to come with the New Year.

Tagging: @digitalkanvas​ @completelyinappropriate​ @aquathemermaidstripper​ @glacian-apocalypse​ @a-new-recipehhh​

[jonthejournalist]

Kerry and Miles do it again

As the credits rolled on this weeks episode, one thought emerged: How amazingly well Kerry Shawcross and Miles Luna had worked that episode. 

How they had taken what was only 10 minutes of content and produced a roller coaster of emotions, as our beloved heroes argued, grieved and fought. And at it’s end, I found myself feeling for each of the characters.

Qrow really shouldn’t of punched Oscar/Ozpin in the face, but his anger is justifiable. His entire adult life was devoted to fighting for Ozpin, constantly reporting to him, fulfilling his missions. In his own words, he gave him a place in this world. 

To find out all his work was almost for nothing? All that loyalty? That would break most people. To be honest, I think it might start to break him.

And his passing line to Ruby?

“Don’t lie to him. We’re better then that.”

He does not say it in malice, I don’t hear a snide edge to his tone. He honestly believes Oscar is doomed to be another one of Ozpin’s ‘lives’. He has been crushed by what’s happened to him. Was it a horrid thing to say? Of course!

But I still emphasise with the character. I feel his pain and sadness.

Now Yang is my personal favourite character. She is damn amazing and do not even get me started on Ember Celica, the best weapon. NO BUTS!

Her yelling and snide remarks in the episode show her rage and blind anger, that so much of the fight they committed themselves to was kept hidden to them, after being promised ‘No more lies. No more half-truths’. Her anger boiling over, lashing out at Maria, despite her trying to give sound advice. She is wrong to yell at her.

But I will freely admit I would do the same. Probably the bastard line too. Though nowhere as well as how Barbara Dunkelman delivered it (I mean what a line, it was crisp ‘Bastard!’ too, just perfect).

I emphasise with Yang, despite her doing the wrong things.

Now Ozpin. Argued by some to be the cause of almost all problems, to others completely misunderstood. Lets get straight to the point. Was he right to lie? No. Was he right to run and hide away, when he has so much to answer for? Nope!

But I still emphasise with him.

His every failing, all the pain over multiple life times that Ozpin has endured was just laid bare. Not to mention watching yourself die a few times, the slow descent to madness of his wife and the deaths of his children. He probably went though one of the most painful flashbacks you could possible have. In all that, I could understand why someone would want to run, to hide. 

Is it right to? No. Was it right to lie to his allies after promising the truth? No. But I get why Ozpin does it.

Ruby, Weiss and Blake are doing the same, all making mistakes. But it makes all of them way better characters. Because we can emphasise with all of them. In some cases, easily imagine ourselves doing it, if we were in their shoes.

They are all flawed, all making mistakes, yet I find them all easy to sympathise with, to understand their anger, grief and sadness. 

Mr Shawcross and Mr Luna, you have done a fine job.

The exception is Maria of course, who is frankly amazing and is either going to be evil or a Silver-eyed warrior/Ruby’s Gran.

Right, giant Sunday session breakdown over. Please remember everyone, everyone is entitled to their own opinions. I seen a few nasty comments, a few barbs being thrown. Remember, at the end of the day, we are all supporting the same show. Debate, please, but don’t take it too far. And if someone is mean to you, you don’t need to retaliate. Be Ruby, not Salem.

PEACE, I’M OUT

(Seriously though Maria is the best, that lady is smart and got sass for days)

[insomniasix]

Tragedia Coram Amandum Quae |Part II|

A/N: Mostly explanation part. Working on the rest now. *whisper* It gets more complicated |names and such|

Words: 2676

OCs: Six Ulric, Elderon Lights, Morticia Blackwell, Sha’van Blacke (If you don’t want me using anyone please let me know! )

Warning: Swearing, Violence, Complicated situations  (If I’ve missed anything please hit me up, I don’t want to make anyone uncomfortable!)

Part I

So, you’re still here huh? Good. I’m starting to like having you around.

Alright, so, last time I told you a lot of things about myself and thinking back on it, it seems kinna selfish. You don’t leave in my head. You probably don’t know what’s going on, or half the shit I talked about. So how about I explain a few things before getting to the good stuff? Yeah, things are getting even more complicated by the minute here, so let me try and clear some of it up.

Where do I begin?

How about Noctis?

Yeah, Noctis sounds good.

There’s a legend going around for eons. It tells the story of The One True King. The one who vanished all Darkness from the face of Eos, defeating the Accursed and his mighty army of daemons.

His name was Noctis! And for his actions and sacrifice, the Six Gods of Old named him “Protector of the Light”.

Time moved on and the people –me included, forgot, or didn’t care about the Old Astrals.

“They disappeared” Morticia Blackwell, the High Priestess, said “leaving only the Holy Protector to look over Eos.”

Years have passed and Noctis is the only remaining Astral. The Protector of Light!

Don’t know if I believe the fairytales about his accent in Astralhood but I know one thing: If there’s someone worth believing in, it’s him! I’ve read the stories, about the ten years of Darkness and Daemons; and to be honest, I’d be scared shitless living in a time like that.

I don’t have to though, thanks to Him; thanks to the things he went through and sacrificed.

If you ask me, the “Evil” he fought, this “Accursed”, he was just another pawn of the Six, too. Just like Noctis himself. It doesn’t really matter though. Gods and Daemons have nothing on real, living, fire-breathing dragons!

Second theme of explanation.

If there aren’t any daemons, what do the people fight?

What do we hunt and kill except from each other?

In the beginning, people were content. They and their children and grandchildren wouldn’t have to be afraid anymore. Especially since the sun stood tall in the sky again. But a few years later, the world became trigger-happy! Killing, stealing, eating each other alive –sometimes that last part was literal, too.

Things got real crappy real fast and the world was neck deep in chaos again!

That’s when the Three Kingdoms rose up.

Lucis, standing proud on the Northeast of the map. Home of yours truly. Ruled by the Lucis Caelum bloodline.

Accordo, on the South. Accordo and its people are pretty chill when it comes to… well, pretty much everything. I mean, they’re probably thinking something like “We’re surrounded by water, what could possibly go wrong?”. They haven’t been wrong up until now. The Accordo bloodline seems to keep their nose out of everyone’s business, action that has kept them going all these years.

Lastly, the troublemakers, if I’d ever seen a bunch. The Niflheim Empire. Led by the “Man of No Consequence”, the “Time traveler” and probably a hundred other self-proclaimed titles, Ardyn Izunia Fleuret and his precious witch of a daughter, Lunafreya; the one who enchanted my idiot father and sent me to jail.

The Kingdoms have been at war for as long as I can remember, the only neutral party being the High Priestess no-one dared to fuck with –I’ll get to explaining her story at some point.

About a year ago, the emperor of Niflheim, Ardyn and his daughter Lunafreya, came to Lucis with talks and ideas about how the two powers should unite. It was a bullshit story the King should have foreseen would end badly.

The emperor and his daughter stayed inside the Citadel’s walls for three days. Luna didn’t need more to put some unlucky bastard under her spell. That unlucky bastard being my father, the great Nyx Ulric! The gemstone of the Crownsguard and Kingsglaive all together.

You know, no matter what I call him now, he used to be a good man, a great soldier and an even better father! He was the only family I had.

He was a fool, though.

So, when Luna swayed her magnificent piece of ass in front of him, he followed like an obedient puppy.

God, I hope it was just that. I hope he followed her to Hell because of her magic; it’s the only way the King –the only way I would ever forgive him.

He led both Luna and her father to the Archives when everyone else was occupied with something. Being the captain helped greatly; he knew every schedule of every soldier in the Kingdom.

Try lying to that man when you get home late. Not fun!

Anyway, the enemy royal family grabbed the Kingdom’s most valuable secrets –and my dad, and hauled ass!

Few days later, the Council of Royal Asses instructed King Regis to send me in jail, to pay for the crimes of my family, saying it’s the only right thing to do. Show the world that no crime goes unpunished, no matter your place in the food chain.

I spent a year in jail, a year of everyone –except maybe a handful of people, blaming and shaming my family’s name. The name we worked so hard to build. A year in jail for a crime I didn’t even commit.

I’m not here to vent, though. So, where was I? Oh, right. Explaining. Let’s see.

Enemies of men.

The Astral, Noctis, took care of the daemons, so they’re out of the list, thankfully. There are more beasts running around now. From spiders –reaching the size of an average sheep, to Behemoths and Dragons; the beasts’ sizes vary, with the largest being High Dragons and the last remaining Zu –all reaching unmeasurable sizes when fully grown.

Between you and me though, when it comes to danger, it’s not entirely about the beast’s size as much as it is the brains. I find humans being the worst of all! A beast will attack when threatened, for its survival; humans, on the other hand, have proved to slay each other for their own liking, for fun!

No, I’m not talking about Niflheim! I’m talking about the Glauca band of thieves and murderers!

They top even the Emperor of Niflheim in both creativity and brutality. Ravaging entire villages and cities, no matter what time of day. Torturing and killing men, women and children alike.

I met a guy once, some five years back. We had both been captured by Titus Drautos, the band’s leader. I was sent to assassinate him –my first and only fail, while my soon to be friend, was out for revenge.

The band had been terrorizing his village for years, so he decided to pick up his sword and title as a renowned hunter again.

Elderon Lights of Galahd!

The man was a beast; but even he wasn’t enough to take Glauca down.

The band had attacked Galahd while Elderon was on a Griffon hunt. He came back to witness his home buried in flames and blood!

Elderon run inside, calling out, screaming for his wife to answer him. For a sign that she was alright, but his wife… Hope, never answered back.

His heart stopped as he reached the backyard.

Hope was laying on the ground, her marked torso pressing against the blooded dirt, all sign of life had left her mistreated body.

Elderon sank into his knees, his trembling, calloused fingers grabbed hold of his beloved’s soulless body, moving her closer to him as he cried, making promises of revenge and justice against the Astrals and the murderers.

Blinded by his own hatred and rage, he didn’t notice I was moving to in too, from the opposite direction. As a result we fell right on top of each other. We argued as to who had more right to be there, to take care of things –not revealing our true intentions, stories or identities. We caught one of the thieves’ ear and they were on us in no time.

After about three weeks, Elderon and I managed to get away from Drautos, thankfully before he or his lackeys got their hands on me.

Elderon got most of it! Defying their orders and defending my honor and dignity.

He didn’t even know me, yet I got away with only a few new scars while his own back was barely recognizable.

“Not all men are evil, yet the line between the two notions is getting thinner every day. I know. I’ve seen people there –I’ve been there. Struggling to figure out what’s right and what’s wrong. It’s now always clear as day. There are consequences, for your choices and the choices made for you. Those consequences and the way you deal with them, are what defines where you stand.” That quote he told me has stayed with me ever since. Drawing a visible line in my mind and placing people in their right side; I have to admit, I think I’m running out of space on the ‘Evil’ side.

Speaking of the line between good and evil, this is where the explanation for the High Priestess comes in. It’s the last one, too. Promise.

Morticia Blackwell. A mighty enchantress. Morta was given the power to ‘Speak’ with the Astrals when she was only a child. As a result she was the youngest Priestess to join the Chantry. Morta made her way up the hierarchy pretty fast as she was named High Priestess at only 27 years of age. All these years later –she’s like twice that age now, she’s still one of the most powerful people on Eos, if not THE most powerful.

Morticia is the line itself.

The Chantry can’t take place in politics or wars. It’s out for all the people Noctis scarified for. As a result, it’s the highest power there is. Both Lucis and Niflheim desire its power, but Morta quite simple told them to ‘Suck it’. She said she’d rather be trapped in the Beyond than decide who to aid in all those meaningless wars the nations waged at each other.

I have to admit, for a gal her age, she has balls; and the sass is strong with that woman. I adore her –when she’s on our side.

The High Priestess is a unique caster of both Light and Dark magic, although she prefers to use her healing techniques as well as the elements. She has great respect for all living things, even if sometimes she doesn’t agree with the choices made by them. For example, when the Niflheim Emperor decided to abduct her, so she would be seen in Niflheim instead of Lucis, Morticia showed them who’s boss. She took down all the soldiers and assassins the Emperor had sent and appeared on his bedside when he slept soundly. Her dark figure rose above him like a nightmarish shadow, everything, from her hair to her eyes to her dress was pitch black. She cast a spell on the Emperor and his followers, trapping them in each one’s nightmare for two days. Two days of sleeping in their beds soundly while their brains were destroying their spirits. A small price to pay, she said. Needless to say Niflheim never whined about her staying in Lucis, ever again.

Thinking on that story, the way she ‘punished’ them, the way she appeared on the Emperor; just the thought of it sends shivers down my spine. You see, the Morta I know is always cheerful, helpful to the ones in need; helpful to the ones who don’t want to be helped. In that story, the High Priestess appears nothing like the one of Lucis.

When she’s here; when she’s home, she’s the exact opposite. She’s always dressed in white, matching her long silky white hair and her bright smile that reaches up to her rosy cheeks, creating faint wrinkles around her misty hazel blue eyes.

I always wondered if she was the reason Lucis is considered a Good Kingdom. Morticia being the line –the border between the two notions and nations. But I guess I’m over thinking stuff again.

What do you think?

Hah, look at me. Actually talking to you. I must be going insane.

Well, like promised, I have no more explanations as to what has been going on around Eos. So I guess I’ll start telling you what’s going on now.

They got me out of my prison cell, only to put me in another. This one doesn’t have bars and gray walls. This is the Council room. A large chamber, filled only by a round table and a bunch of chairs right in the middle of it. There are statues of Iron Giants on the walls near the entrance; well, I think that’s what they are. I’ve read about them in the Archives. Noctis really fought those things?

The King had sent for me. They gave me plenty of time to take a shower and get into some new clothes, other than the dirty white scrubs they had me wearing for a year. It sure feels nice having a pair of new clothes around my body again. They also gave me my phone and wedding ring back –guess that means I won’t be going back. Wonder what they have in store for me.

I’m sitting on one of the chairs, waiting for someone to appear. I’ve gone through all my missed messages –all from Ignis. The man knows how to make a woman blush. He knew I wasn’t going to answer but he still sent a “Good Morning” or a “Good night” every day. My eyes passed a few “I love you”s too, as well as some “I miss you”s. I did too, my love. Once this charade is over, I’m coming home!

-Iggy, are you there?

Sent him a message? What the hell am I thinking? How is he gonna answer it? How is he gonna see it? Stupid! Stupid! Now he’s just gonna worry if it’s –oh, it’s been delivered. Oh, Noctis. What am I doing?

-My love? Is this really you? By Noctis, Six, what have you done?

He answered? How the –he’s probably with someone. Maybe he’s gone to Morticia for healing.

-They got me out. Gave me new clothes. I’m waiting for a Council meeting as it seems. Are you alright?

My heart is pumping like crazy. I still get nervous every time I text him.

-So that is why. His Majesty sent for me as well. I should be at the Citadel in an hour. Do you think you can stall them enough? I have missed your voice.

Aw, Ignis. There’s chatter coming behind the doors. Guess they’re here.

-I will do what I can. Make it quick, can’t wait to see you again.

The doors open, here comes the Council of Royal Asses! I look up at them, eyebrow raised and they all stare back, jaws clenched as they see my posture. I’ve crossed my legs and placed them on their table, my eyes never leaving my phone as I wait for Ignis to answer.

The King walked in behind them along with the new Princess, Sa’van Blacke. She’s the only one worth respecting of the entire bunch. The King is… is he smiling at me? This is getting weird. Where is Gladio?

Let me sit correctly, my ass is starting to cramp. Sa’van took a seat next to me instead of her rightful place next to the King.

“Are you alright?” she asks.

“I’m fine. What is going on? What have I done this time?” I whisper only for her to listen, my eyes never leaving the creepy smile the King is blessing me with.

“We are in need of your help, Six. So please” did she just place her hand on mine? I mean, I like Sa’van, I respect her, but is the situation that bad? “Please listen to what His Majesty has to say before the witty comments.”

“Alright” this should be interesting.

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[weekendwarriorblog]

The Weekend Warrior 6/18/2021 - THE HITMAN’S WIFE’S BODYGUARD, THE SPARKS BROTHERS, LUCA, 12 MIGHTY ORPHANS, FATHERHOOD, RITA MORENO and More!

Well, it’s another week and another column and now I’m not only trying to stay on top of Emmy stuff for Below the Line, but I’m also desperately trying to see stuff for the 20th Tribeca Festival AND still having time to watch stuff for the column. As Nancy Meyers might say, “Something’s Gotta Give.” (Well, maybe she said it when someone asked her the title of her next movie in 2002. Shut up.)

But first, this week’s “The Chosen One” and how could it be anything but Edgar Wright’s THE SPARKS BROTHERS (Focus Features), which I’ve now seen three times maybe?

To talk about Sparks, you almost have to remember the first time you heard of Sparks, and for me, it was in the early ‘80s when I was getting hipper into music and record collecting, and I’d see the covers of their records with their punny titles and be like, “What is this?” But those covers also scared me in some ways. Oddly, the “alternative rock” station WLIR should have been playing the hell out of Sparks in the ‘80s but other than “Cool Places,” their duet with the Go-Go’s Jane Wiedlin, they went mostly ignored.

It wasn’t until I saw them on Saturday Night Live performing “Mickey Mouse,” and I was immediately fascinated by keyboard player Ron Mael’s stage presence, standing completely still and stoic while his brother Russell pranced around the stage like a true rock star. Over the years, I heard covers by bands like the Dirtbombs and the Dresden Dolls, but it wasn’t until I watched the movie did I realize the influence they had on early new wave bands like Duran Duran, Erasure and Depeche Mode.

In many ways, there’s no one more perfect to direct this documentary other than Wright, since the Maels have been so influenced by cinema and their work with auteur filmmakers, some endeavors more successful than others. And then of course, Wright, has this amazing encyclopedic knowledge of music, as well as being so connected to that world that he can get the likes of Beck and Flea and others to go on camera to talk about the band. This is one case where the veritable Who’s Who *IS* a veritable Who’s Who. The number of actors and artists who come forward to share their stories about Sparks is quite amazing to the point where there’s almost a “Holy shit!” moment every couple minutes. “There’s two of New Order! And two of Duran Duran!” (Is there ANYONE Edgar DOESN’T know?)

More importantly, he gets Ron and Russ to talk at length about their entire career, almost album by album -- and they’ve made 25 of them! -- and it even covers the band’s leaner years in the 90s

All the interviews are done in black and white, almost as the perfect contrast to the colorful stories they tell and the similarly colorful music videos that punctuate those stories.

I mean, if Wright was writing a thesis paper on the influence and reach of Sparks, then he’d get an “A.” But then that still bodes the question: Are Sparks loved because their songs can be weird or have such a strange sense of humor? Well, They Might Be Giants, probably one of the most obvious influences, has never mentioned Sparks’ influence before, as far as I know, although, they, too, win over fans with the charm of their humorous songs. Even when you think of other groups of two members like the Black Keys, Sparks were doing that first, as well.

I couldn’t tell you if The Sparks Brothers will turn the brothers Mael into the global superstars selling out stadiums they’ve deserved to be for many years, but I know it’s going to be a LOT tougher to get tickets to see them the next time they tour between this and Leos Carax’s Spark-written musical Annette later this summer. Wright’s documentary is the definition of comprehensive.

I’m honestly not 100% sure how wide Focus Features is releasing this movie, but I figure it will be in 500 or 600 theaters, which would be a great way to get word out about the band. I’d love to see Wright’s fans go out to see it and for it to make a million or two this weekend, as that wouldn’t be bad for any documentary, especially with so many going straight to streaming these days.

Let’s get to the single wide release of the week, which opened on Wednesday (something I completely forgot), and it’s THE HITMAN’S WIFE’S BODYGUARD (Lionsgate), the reunion of Samuel L. Jackson (as the hitman), Ryan Reynolds (as the bodyguard) and Salma Hayek (as the hitman’s wife). See how all of that works? The action-comedy sequel hopes to capitalize on the success of the first movie, which was #1 for an amazing three weeks in the late summer of 2017, grossing $75 million in North America alone.

The sequel opens at a very different time when a $21.4 million opening (like the original movie) wouldn’t be bad, but can THWB make that much at a time when people are being very precious about what they see in theaters? At least this one, unlike last week’s In the Heights -- which made less than half what I predicted -- is not debuting on streamers so if anyone wants to see it, they will have to go out to theaters, but why would they want to see it?

I already reviewed this at Below the Line, and I guess I liked it more than a lot of critics, because it’s currently at 30% on Rotten Tomatoes, which is very, VERY bad. That’s an even lower rating than Samuel L. Jackson’s last movie with Lionsgate, the horror sequel Spiral: From the Book of Saw, which bombed last month, opening with less than $9 million. So yeah, people may not rush out to see it for Jackson, but it’s been a very long time since there was a movie from Ryan Reynolds, and he’s definitely more of an A-lister thanks to the Deadpool movies. In fact, it’s been two full years since Reynolds was in Detective Pikachu, which grossed $144 million domestically, mostly with his voice role. Reynolds also provided a voice in The Croods: A New Age, one of the first movies to open theatrically during the pandemic that grossed $58 million.

It’s really hard to gauge how THWB will do under pandemic rules, even as places like New York City have thrown off all COVID limitations, so that theaters should be allowed to be full again? Will that matter? After the last few weeks, I feel like I should go lower on this one, closer to $15 to 17 million. I’m not sure if most people will even realize this opened Wednesday, but people are still figuring things out, and I’m not sure the original movie is as beloved as three times at #1 might convey.

Also expanding nationwide into about 800 theaters is 12 MIGHTY ORPHANS (Sony Pictures Classics), which I wrote a little about last week when it opened in 120 Texas theaters, although I hadn’t actually seen it at that time. Well, I’ve seen it, and I have to say that it’s a perfectly pleasant period underdog story that I actually enjoyed more than George Clooney’s wacky Leatherheads, which is set around the same period.

Again, it’s not a particularly groundbreaking story, showing how Luke Wilson’s Rusty Russell takes a rag-tag group of orphans from the Masonic Home orphanage in Fort Worth, Texas, and not only teaches them how to read and do math but also how to play football in the early days when very few of the current plays existed. If you’ve seen any of these types of movies before, then you probably already know how it plays out, and though I try not to be cynical, especially with the over-the-top villainy of Wayne Knight’s cricket-bat wielding abuser, I do think this offers one of Wilson’s better performances, and I enjoyed seeing Martin Sheen in a strong supporting role as well.

Even knowing full well that most of the conflicts the team faces will probably be the kind of “5-minute drama” that will be resolved soon enough, it’s still enjoyable to watch such an inspirational story that one can probably forgive some of the cliches of the genre that keeps the film’s last act from elevating itself above the obviousness last act. (When it decides to show what happened to every single person in the movie during the end credits, you could hear the sound of my eyes rolling.) This might appeal to those looking for something a little less snarky or cynical at a time when that’s the norm, but true cinephiles will rightfully snub their nose at those cliches, because this feels like one of those sports movies that tries to win audiences over by not veering too far from what has worked previously.

Even expanding into 800 theaters this Friday, I’m not sure 12 Mighty Orphans will make more than a half million this weekend.

Pixar Animation Studios releases its latest offering LUCA (Disney/Pixar) onto Disney+ and into one single L.A. theater. It’s the first feature film from Enrico Casarosa, who directed the Oscar-nominated short, La Luna, and I wish I liked it more than I did. It centers around a young sea monster named Luca (voiced by Jacob Tremblay), who discovers that he can pass off as human when he surfaces from his deep-sea home. He makes a friend with another sea monster named Antonio (Jack Dylan Grazer) and the two of them go off on a quest to find a Vespa, because that is their obsession. Along the way, they meet a spunky redhead girl named Giulia (Emma Berman), and they decide to take part in a race that can win them the money they need for that Vespa. That’s it. That’s the plot.

Honestly, I have no idea what my fellow critics and other movie enthusiasts are seeing in this movie, because it reminded me of a very bad Roberto Benigni movie with these American actors breaking out into bad Italian accents or phony Italian every few minutes. It’s obvious the movie’s director is from Italy and some have even called this movie a “love letter to Italy,” which makes you wonder why he would want to have these kid actors doing inappropriate takes on Italians by throwing in random Italian words but mostly speaking in English. It was really hard to get past, and it distracted me from enjoying it. I just didn’t really care for any of the characters at all. Giulia, while fun at first, just gets annoying, because she’s such a spaz.

The animation also wasn’t particularly impressive, seeming very cartoonish -- yes, I know it’s a cartoon -- but it just shows how hard it is to have humans star in an animated movie, because you really have to work harder on the characterization than what has clearly been done here. Because of this, Luca lacks much of what made Soul and other Pixar movies so special, as it’s just a kids’ adventure movie with the flimsiest literal fish-out-of-water premise with very little in terms of jokes, so it relies on physical humor and the idea that the boys need to hide their seamonster-ness from the naties. Even the presence of the genuinely funny Maya Rudolph and Jim Gaffigan voicing Luca’s parents do very little to save the movie. It just seems to be throwing everything but the kitchen sink at the viewer to make up for the weak characters.

This is one of the first true disappointments from Pixar, maybe my least favorite movie the company has made since Coco, which won the Oscar and had people falling over each other to praise it. Casarosa’s short was really wonderful, but this is just not a very good feature, and I honestly don’t know who this was meant for. It’s not particularly funny or moving or anything. It’s just a very basic watered-down premise that goes nowhere. Skip this and get your kids to watch a Fellini movie instead.

Streaming on Netflix Friday is Kevin Hart’s new comedy, FATHERHOOD (Netflix), which was originally produced by Sony PIctures, but then like so many other movies, it got sold off to Netflix for streaming. It kind of makes sense, since Hart has been a regular brand on the streamer. Adapted from Matthew Logelin’s book, Two Kisses for Maddy: A Memoir of Love & Love, the movie is co-written and directed by the great Paul Weitz, and it co-stars Alfre Woodard, Lil Rel Howery, DeWanda Wise, Anthony Carrigan, Melody Hurd and Paul Reiser. Basically, Hart plays Matt, whose wife dies in childbirth leaving him with a baby girl, Maddy, that he swears to raise even without a wife, even though his mother (Woodard) doesn’t think he can handle fatherhood.

This is a very different movie for Hart, one that allows him to use some of his dramatic acting muscles that we’ve rarely seen from him, although the movie comes more into its own as it goes along. At first, we’re basically watching him trying to care for a baby in a way that doesn’t really break much new ground from the constant talk about babies crying and shitting. (That is what they do, after all.)

Once Maddy grows up, there’s a new dynamic, and Hart is great playing the role of a single father trying to date again, and when he meets a new woman named Swan (DeWanda Wise), he isn’t sure how to introduce her to his daughter. Melody Hurd, the young actress playing the slightly older Maddy is quite good and able to really help drive the second act of the movie, which is far more dramatic and real. She not only holds her own against Hart but also with Woodard!

Even though this is more dramatic than Hart’s normal fare, there are still some great low-key laughs including some great scenes between Hart and Howery as his friend. I genuinely enjoyed Fatherhood, since it’s sweet and a very different kind of movie for Hart, maybe due to Weitz’s able direction. Fatherhood probably won’t be for everyone and to some, seeing Hart in this role won’t be quite like when Adam Sandler makes his occasional foray into films like Punch Drunk Love or Uncut Gems -- that’s just the hypocrisy of film criticism -- but I’m sure this will do just fine on Netflix with Father’s Day being on Sunday.

A movie I saw at SXSW earlier this year was Jaco Bouwer’s GAIA (Decal), which reminded me a bit of Ben Wheatley’s In the Earth. It stars Monique Rockman as an injured forest ranger who is saved by two survivalists, a rescue that becomes increasingly more suspicious as the son and his father have a cultish devotion to the forest, and she soon learns there’s a far great threat in the wilderness.It will hit theaters on Friday and then On Demand June 25. I just didn’t have the bandwidth to rewatch this to write a full review but it was fine, but just not quite on par with Wheatley’s movie, although it sure is pretty.

A doc that’s being released theatrically Friday after its own festival run is Mariem Pérez Riera’s RITA MORENO: JUST A GIRL WHO DECIDED TO GO FOR IT (Roadside Attractions), which as you can tell from the title, looks at the amazing life and career of the EGOT-winning singer/actress who is such an inspiration for LatinX performers that she was able to get the likes of Héctor Elizondo, Gloria Estefan, Tom Fontana, Morgan Freeman, Mitzi Gaynor, Whoopi Goldberg, Norman Lear, Eva Longoria, Justina Machado, Terrence McNally, Lin-Manuel Miranda and Karen Olivo on camera to talk about her.

I really kind of enjoyed this movie, which just played at the Tribeca Film Festival, because I learned so much about Moreno that I really didn’t know before, but also it’s such an inspirational story as we hear her talk about what some of the scenes in West Side Story meant to her sixty years after winning the Oscar for the role, even though she’s still on record as giving one of the shortest Oscar speeches ever: “I don’t believe it!”

She also talks about really personal things like being raped by her agent, who she kept on as her agent after the incident, but that adds to her political activism in recent years, and she’s still a spry and lively disruptor at the age of 87. This is just a brilliant documentary that’s a long time coming.

Another doc worth checking out is Nancy Buirski’s A CRIME ON THE BAYOU, exec. Produced by John Legend’s company, Get Lifted Film Co. It revisits the case of Gary Duncan, a young fisherman in a Louisiana parish who tried to break up a fight at an integrated school in 1966, but when he puts his hand on a white boy’s arm, he’s prosecuted for assault on a minor. Duncan’s case was taken all the way to the Supreme Court to make sure he got a fair trial. This is a decent doc, but I don’t have a ton to say about it, nor the time for a full review.

Francois Ozon returns with SUMMER OF 85 (Music Box Films), which stars Félix Lefebvre as Alexis, whose boat capsizes off the coast of Normandy, Benjamin Voisin’s David comes to his rescue and opens the younger boy’s eyes to friendship, art and sexual bliss. Adapted from Aidan Chambers’ LGBT young adult novel Dance on my Grave, the film explores the relationship between the two boys and the challenges, including Philippine Velge’s sexual rival. The movie will open in New York at the Angelika Film Center, Village East, and Film at Lincoln Center, in Los Angeles at Laemmle’s Royal, Laemmle Playhouse 7 in Pasadena and Laemmle Town Center in Encino, and San Francisco (Embarcadero and Shattuck Cinema) followed by key markets across the US, including I’m assuming the Music Box home in Chicago.

Also opening as part of the Metrograph’s Live Screenings this week is THE AMERICAN SECTOR (Grasshopper Films), Courtney Stephens and Pacho Velez’s doc about the panels of the Berlin Wall that have been installed as monuments all across the United States, as they talk to people in those locations to find out what they mean to them.

Premiering on Apple TV+ this week is the new series PHYSICAL, starring the wonderful Rose Byrne (also in theaters in Peter Rabbit 2: The Runaway), but a few more movies I just didn’t have time to get to…

LES NOTROS (Oscilloscope)

THE BIRTHDAY CAKE (ScreenMedia)

STALKER (Vertical Entertainment)

Wait, is it possible? Is next week really FINALLY the release of Universal PIctures’ F9 in North America?