Whole
Steve Harrington x fem!Reader
Rated MA for the most long-winded poetic smut i've ever written jfc đ€Šââïž slow burn fluff with a couple sprinkles of angst for flavor, reader uses fem pronouns and is described as having female parts, it's dirty y'all but at least they use protection
7,470 Words
A/N: you all know my mo by now i disappear for a year and then come back and lay down some god damned PORN. this fic is no exception to the rule. @shakespeareanwannabe requested this back in july and she literally just asked for a cute moment between steve and dustin, sorry you got 6k words more than you bargained for đ but also thank you for betaing and the constant validation you're the best ily đ€
Steveâs not sure how it even worked.
He can still remember the look on Robinâs face when you agreed, how she was speechless for almost ten minutes because she couldnât process what had just happened.
Steveâs reaction was about the same as hers, in all honesty. Heâs gotten so used to striking out that asking people out has become something of a game to him. He knows heâll get a no, and he knows Robin will laugh her ass off at him. But what can he say? He likes putting a smile on his best friendâs face.
Needless to say, youâve shaken him. In the best possible way. Because your answer was three letters instead of two.
And now, he's a little bit in over his head.
Or, to be more accurate, a lot in over his head.
It seems like itâs been ages since heâs gone on a date, even though itâs only been a few months at most. He feels lost, like heâs completely unlearned everything he ever knew about girls.
He hates it, despises it with every fiber of his own being, but he also knows itâs true; he needs advice. And although heâll never admit it to the little shitheadâs face, thereâs no one better he can think of going to than his very own protege. Who better to remind him of his own prowess than the person who learned everything they know from him?
One look at Dustinâs smug little face and Steve almost regrets it. Almost.
âJust canât stay away, can you?â
âYeah, yeah.â Steve rolls his eyes and gives the younger boy a little shove, camouflaging it with an affectionate pat on the back. âThis is strictly business, Henderson.â
âOh, is it now?â The younger boyâs voice takes on a smug tone as he folds his fingers together and leans back in his chair. âWell then, why donât you have a seat? Step into my office.â
Steve rolls his eyes and slides into the booth, shooting a smile and a âthank youâ to the kind waitress who delivers two milkshakes to their table.
Dustin takes his time and makes a meal of unwrapping his straw, feeding off of Steveâs clear impatience Steveâs fingers tap against the table, reminding himself that patience is necessary when you come to someone for a favor. Itâs just that itâs Dustin, and Dustin knows exactly how to get under the older boyâs skin in the most annoying-yet-oddly-endearing fashion.
âSoâŠâ Dustin finally says after a lengthy sip of strawberry milkshake. âWhat brings you so humbly to me?â
âIâve got a date.â
And Dustin, the little bastardâhe laughs. A deep, rumbling belly laugh, so pure and unfiltered that the three other occupied tables in the diner pause their conversations to get a look at the boy clutching his sides.
Steveâs a little embarrassed by the attention, but even more embarrassed that Dustinâs reaction is so genuine. The fact that the idea of him having a date is so laughable is a bit of a punch to the gut. It hasnât really been that long, has it?
When Dustinâs laughter finally dies down he realizes Steveâs face is completely serious, and it makes him giggle even more.
âWait, youâre actually serious? Who on earth did you manage to pull?â
Steveâs nearly bashful as he says your name, and even more bashful when Dustinâs jaw visibly drops.
âNo fucking way. Iâd believe anyone else, but her? Sheâs like⊠hotter than Phoebe Cates. Thereâs no way you wouldnât strike out with her.â
Steveâs immediately on the defensive. Is it really so hard to believe that he, former king of Hawkins High, could pull the most gorgeous girl in town?
But thatâs just it. Thereâs really no one like you, not in his eyes. Heâs admired you since freshman year and never once even tried with you because he knew he wasnât worthy. You were always in the backgroundâa beautiful, kind, smart, funny girl just out of his reach. Part of the reason he even asked you out was because he was so sure he would strike out. In the end, losing his confidence was exactly what he needed to pull the girl of his dreams.
And thatâs why thereâs so much riding on this. Youâve always been his biggest âwhat ifâ, the girl he wonders about when thinking that maybe not trying has been holding him back. And apparently, it has.
âLook, I donât even know how it happened, okay? But she said yes, and⊠and I really donât want to blow it.â
âWell duh. Youâll have to leave town if you blow it with her, you know that, right? If she doesnât think youâre worth it, no one else in this town ever will again.â
âThatâs exactly what Iâm afraid of!â Steve groans, slouching down so far in the booth that Dustin can just barely see his poor, overwhelmed face.
âSteve, listenâŠâ Dustinâs voice takes on an almost fatherly quality, an omniscient tone that gives off the illusion of great hidden knowledge. He gets like this sometimes, and Steveâs not always sure that it is just an illusion. âDonât let this go to your head, but youâre, like, one of the coolest guys I know. If she doesnât like you⊠thatâs her problem, not yours. Okay?â
Steve straightens in his seat, a little shocked to hear such kind words from a friend that heâs used to being mercilessly teased by.
âNo, no, no, itâs going to your head. I take it all back. Forget I said anything.â Dustinâs hearty giggle makes Steve smile as he sets a wad of bills on the table and slides out of the booth.
âYouâre not so bad Henderson, you know that?â He gives the younger boyâs full head of curls an affectionate ruffle. âThanks, kid. Iâll radio later.â
Not that Steve didnât have total faith in his young protege, but itâs still a relief that the pep talk turned out to be exactly what he needed to hear. Dustinâs right, after all. Steveâs worked hard to become the man heâs always wanted to be. He may not be dripping charisma or sex appeal the way he used to, but heâs much more comfortable in his own skin. Thatâs what counts, right?
And you really are his dream girl. The opportunity to take you out tonight, even if it ends up being your first and only date together, is an honor. Heâs much less focused now on all the ways he could screw up, hyper-fixated on putting the effort in to make this the best night of your life.
That effort comes out in the carefully selected suit jacket he dons over his white button-up, the extra spritz of cologne, the careful touch-up shave to vanquish his five oâclock shadow, the extra ten minutes using the perfect amount of product in his hair so that it stays in place yet is still soft to the touch.
By the time he gets to Enzoâs (half an hour early, mind), heâs practically vibrating with nerves and anticipation. Heâs never been much of an overthinker, but he sure is tonight. Is this place too much for the first date? Would you rather do something lowkey, like catch a movie or go for a walk in the park? He has to remind himself a couple of times that you agreed to this, that you wouldnât have said yes if you werenât interested in the arrangement.
To say heâs prepared for this is putting it lightly. Heâs run through every possible scenario in his mind, gone over conversation starters and questions he wants to ask you over and over again until he knows exactly how he wants to phrase each thing.
And still, nothing could prepare him for when you walk through the door.
He has to physically restrain his jaw from dropping because in the moment he sees you, every well-planned thought and all etiquette is flushed down the proverbial pipes. Youâre nothing short of breathtaking in a dress that hugs all the right curves and shows just enough cleavage to have him imagining what else there might be to see. Your hair is pinned back out of your face, eyes framed by just the slightest bit of makeup to make the color of your irises pop. He swears heâs never seen a shade quite like them. Itâs like you move in slow motion as you approach himâhe sees the entrance of the smoking hot love interest in every romantic comedy, complete with smoke and fireworks, as you move towards the table.
And then some sense of decorum returns to his addled brain, and he quickly shoots up so he can pull out your chair for you like a proper gentleman. He catches just the slightest whiff of your perfume, and heâs a goner. Heâs ready to sign his life away to you, to yank his own heart out of his chest to offer to your careful hands.
He has to give his head a shake to compose himself before he goes any further off the deep end. No oneâs ever thoroughly shaken him the way you have, and itâs been a matter of thirty seconds. Itâs almost intimidating, the effect you have on him.
âYou look⊠incredible,â he fumbles as he takes his seat across from you. âI mean, you always do, but⊠wow.â
The shy giggle you emit tugs at a heartstring he didnât even know he had.
âThank you,â you tell him with a genuine smile. âYou clean up very well yourself.â
âI do like to put in some effort every once in a while.â He flashes the most charming smile he can muster, and just like that heâs back. His resolve to impress you is reinforced tenfold. Youâve shaken him, and itâs such an unfamiliar feeling that heâs practically bumbling. He wants to shake you just as badly.
The foodâs delicious, and the conversationâs even better. He has a track record for taking out a moreâfor lack of a better termâbimbo-y type, and thatâs definitely not you. Youâre smart, youâre witty, but you donât make him feel like an idiot. Heâs so taken with you that he doesnât even notice that three hours have passed until he looks around the room and notices that every table is now empty and bussed.
The waiter delivers the check, and Steve notices you gnawing on your lip.
âWhatâs on your mind?â He asks, trying not to be too prying.
âI donât want this to be over yet.â
Steve smiles. Heâs got you; hook, line, and sinker. Heâs never been so sure of anything, and that surprises him. Heâs used to dates who are easy to read and even easier to take home, and those arenât the impressions youâve been giving him. To know that youâre feeling exactly what heâs feeling is a huge confidence boost.
âI donât either.â
Your hand is so small compared to his. Thatâs all he can think about as he strolls next to you, his fingers intertwined with yours. Heâs always considered hand-holding to be childâs play, itâs never excited him before the way it does in this moment with you.
Itâs pitch black in the park and he can hear the overlapping chirping of summer cicadas and grasshoppers, the perfect background noise now that the conversation has died down. Itâs less about getting to know each other at this point and more just basking in each otherâs presence, prolonging the inevitable because neither one of you can bear to call it a night when itâs been such a good few hours.
Youâre shocked, to say the very least. Steve certainly has a reputation, and itâs not for being a romantic. Yet everything tonight has flown in the face of all the rumors youâve been hearing since junior high. You figured heâd be a fun fling, and probably only one night at thatâyouâd made your peace with the idea. To find that heâs kind, considerate, funny, and can match your intellect and quick wit⊠itâs a very pleasant surprise. And thatâs what has you out well past a decent hour, giddy over simply holding his hand like youâre a damned school girl all over again.
âI should probably let you go home,â Steve sighs wistfully. He hates to be the one to bring it up, but youâre on your fifth lap around the park and about to circle back to where your car is parked so now seems the best time.
Youâre chewing your lip again, a thoughtful habit that makes his heart pound just a little bit harder.
Hereâs the thing: youâre really not the bold type. You act confident, sure, but in practice itâs a lot more difficult for you. So no oneâs more surprised than you are when you say, âYou could come home with me. If you want.â
Steveâs definitely shocked, too. Less shocked at your proposition and more at the fact that heâs tempted to decline. Because no matter how much heâs been running through the back of his mind what you might look like under that gorgeous dress, he doesnât want this to end there. For the first time in his life, he wants to find more meaning than sex out of a relationship. He doesnât want to take you home and never see you again. He wants to take you out again, and again, and again, and again after that. He sees a future, for once, that doesnât look dim and hopeless. That fact alone scares the shit out of him.
He realizes heâs waited way too long to reply and fumbles for an answer. âOf course I want to. Iâd be an idiot not to. ButâŠâ
You chew that cursed bottom lip of yours again, and Steve has to focus on the obvious cue youâre giving him rather than the fact that he wants to be the next set of teeth around that lip.
He stops in his tracks, gently pulling on your hand to face him so he can take your other hand in his free one. âItâs not a bad but. I mean, Iâm going to go home kicking myself for saying no because I really honestly do want to⊠well, yâknow. But⊠I want to do this right with you. I want to take you out again. I want to get to know you and see where this goes. I canât⊠I donât want this to end tonight.â
Heâs eternally grateful for how dark it is as he feels a flush consume his face. He canât remember a time heâs been so honest and open, especially on a first date; but the look on your face tells him heâs done something right.
âOkay,â you tell him, squeezing his hands in yours. âYou⊠honestly have no clue how nice it is to hear that.â
âOf course,â he continues, âif you just want me for my body, no hard feelings.â
You laugh at that, genuinely laugh, and Steve thinks itâs the best sound heâs ever heard.
âNo,â you reassure him. âNo, I⊠I wanna see where this goes, too.â
Youâre stopped only a few paces from your car, and Steve knows with a twist of his gut that this is the end of the night. It makes his gut turn with disappointment, but also with anticipation of when heâll see you next. Already, his mind is flooding with ideas of where he can take you and what youâll do together.
You drop one of his hands so you can walk but keep a tight grip on the other until you get to your driverâs side door, hesitating outside because youâre still not ready for this to be over. It takes every ounce of restraint he has not to kiss you, unsure of if that would be moving too fast.
Thankfully, you make the call yourself. Leaning up on your toes, hands against his chest for balance, you press your lips against his and he has to summon every mite of strength not to moan. No oneâs ever tasted so sweet, molded against him so perfectly. His hands drift from your shoulders down your arms, coming to rest on your waist as he pulls you just a little bit closer. Itâs a fight of will not to overstep, to break off the kiss before it can become too heated. His mind is spinning by the time you break away. Heâs aching for more, and he hopes you are too.Â
âGoodnight, sweetheart.â
âGoodnight, Steve.â
Your sweet voice replays in his mind all night, long after youâve gotten into your car and driven away, long after heâs returned to his own vehicle and pulled the radio out from under the driverâs seat to check in with Dustin, long after he arrives home and soaks in a cold shower for longer than he probably should. He doesnât think heâll ever get your voice out of his head, and he couldnât be any less upset about it.
He practically counts down the minutes until he sees you again. This time, he has a little less restraint. He greets you with a kissâa sweet peck and a hand on your waist that leaves you aching for even more.
Itâs a movie this time, a chance to enjoy each otherâs company on a night youâre both too tired from working to engage in heavy conversation and getting to know each other further.
It starts with sharing popcorn, then holding hands, then somewhere along the way the film is completely forgotten in favor of your lips meeting his. His breath grows heavy as his hands hold your face, committing you to memory while resisting the urge to explore further. Your hands, meanwhile, are firmly on his thighs, gripping tightly to keep yourself steady as you do everything you can to keep yourself from crawling into his lap.
He whispers your name, and your grip on him tightens.
âW-we shouldnâtâŠâ he murmurs, then gives up on the futile attempt at finishing his sentence so that he can pull you even deeper into the kiss as his tongue sweeps across your bottom lip.
It takes everything in him not to moan when your lips eagerly part to accept him.
Needless to say, once the credits start rolling youâre both more than a little hot under the collar.
âLet me buy you dinner,â Steve suggests as he woefully unwinds himself from you. Declining doesnât even flicker through your mind as a possibility.
Itâs not Enzoâs this time, but it doesnât have to be. He could set a soggy peanut butter and jelly sandwich in front of you at this point and youâd still thank him for it. This time around, youâre not really as interested in the cuisine as you are just simply getting through this meal to whatâs next. Because whatâs next is all youâve been thinking about since you walked through the doors the night of that very first date and saw Steve Harrington wearing a blazer for you. Itâs a level of effort heâs definitely not known forâin fact, heâs built a reputation for putting in so little effort that it nearly made your jaw drop to see him trying. And it certainly made your heart skip a beat.
But then again, the Steve before you carelessly wolfing down his bacon cheeseburger seems very different from the Steve you knew in high school, even if you didnât know that iteration as intimately as this one. That one was cool, collected, snarky and pompous and maddeningly desirable.
This Steve, your Steve, is nearly an exact foil. Much less cocky, a little less confident but more self-assured in the ways that actually hold meaning, less worried about what the people around him are observing of him than what youâre observing of him. He seems happier, more carefree, more eager to please others than simply himself. Heâs grown so much in such a short amount of time, and you feel proud just for having the honor to witness it. Significantly more proud to be on the receiving end of his affections now that they hold the kind of value youâve always wished they would.
He looks up and notices you staring at him while lost in thought, a small smile spreading across his lips as your eyes quickly dart away.
âWhatâs on your mind?â He questions as he licks a stray bit of ketchup from his thumb.
âJust⊠happy Iâm here. With you.â It brings heat to your cheeks to admit it, but you donât want him to go unappreciated in this moment.
Itâs the right thing to say, because his smile grows even wider. âIâm happy too,â he admits. âI⊠Iâve wanted to ask you out for a while. Could never work up the courage, I guess.â
âSteve âthe hairâ Harrington was intimidated by me?â You say it with a mock gasp, but your shock is more genuine than you give off. Never in a million years would you have thought that he, the man who could have whoever he wanted, would be worried over you saying no to him. Itâs almost comical, especially considering the way you practically threw yourself at him on your first date. Of course then, you had no clue how much heâd developed as a person. Youâre almost ashamed of your behavior now, as if you mightâve inadvertently been taking advantage of the new and improved Steve who isnât just into you for a hookup.
He shrugs, nearly bashful at your teasing. âNever figured I was good enough for you. So I didnât bother to try.â
Youâre genuinely curious now, leaning in a little closer and brushing your fingers against his hand resting atop the diner counter. âWhat made you change your mind?â
âHonestly? I was so sure youâd say no that I asked just to give Robin a chuckle. She loves watching me get shot down.â
That makes you frown, and heâs quick to backtrack. âI wanted to! I just⊠Iâve had a bad track record lately. And youâre⊠youâre you. Youâre the last person I should be worthy of.â
His eyes are quick to avert from your gaze, bottom lip tugged between his teeth as he contemplates whether heâs said too much.
âSteveâŠâ you properly grab his hand now in the hopes that itâll bring his eyes back to you, and it works. âYouâre the only person Iâve deemed worthy in a long time, honestly.â
Steve Harrington is scaldingly warm. Itâs one of many sensations forcing your mind into overdrive as he lays you delicately across the backseat of his beemer, one hand cushioning the back of your head while simultaneously deepening the already heated kiss and the other balancing his weight to lean over you in the cramped space without completely crushing you.
Your fingers tangle themselves into his soft brown locks, tugging ever-so-slightly as his tongue slips between your parted lips. Heâs an eager explorer and youâre more than happy to let him take the lead, to show you all the skill youâve heard so many whispers about.
You let out an involuntary moan as he wedges himself even closer to you, his body heat soaking through all the layers of clothing between the two of you and warming you all the way to your very bones.
Youâre practically aching, ready to beg, and he knows it the second you wrap your legs around his waist in an attempt to get him even closer. If thereâs one thing Steve Harringtonâs good at, itâs assessing your needs. He pulls away just the slightest bit to adjust his position so he can get closer, wedging a knee between your legs to press right against your core, and it makes you jolt back against the car door at the same time his head hits the roof just a bit too hard.
You both pause for a moment, the reality of your situation hitting you simultaneously, and then youâre laughing. Itâs light and edged with unresolved want, but itâs enough to fracture the tension of the moment.
âIâm sorry,â he whispers. âShouldnât have gotten so carried away. This isnât how I want to do this.â
âNo?â
âNo. You deserve way better than this old beater,â he chuckles, then leans down to kiss you. This kiss is lighter, no longer edged with tension and lust. He kisses you just to kiss youâthereâs no end goal to it this time.
âWhat could be better than a BMW?â You tease lightly, trying to reassure him that youâre less disappointed than you really feel.
âYou know. Something romantic. A proper bed, rose petals, maybe a few candlesâŠâ
âI donât need all that,â you try to tell him.
âI think I do,â he admits. And thatâs enough to pull you back, to remind you that you need to be patient and grateful that he values you so much as to want to do this whole thing properly. That his affection is something to be cherished, not taken for granted.
âIâm sorry,â you whisper. âI didnât mean to be pushy.â
âPlease donât apologize.â He hesitates to untangle himself from you, even though he knows he needs to. âI want this just as bad. I just⊠I need it to be right.â
âAs long as I have you, itâll be right,â you reassure. âI hope you know that.â
He presses his lips to yours again, a slow and passionate kiss that he hopes communicates every bit of adoration he feels for you in this moment.
âItâll be perfect. I swear,â he vows. Youâve never believed anything more whole-heartedly than you do this promise.Â
~~~
âWait, youâre telling me that you literally had her under you and you stopped?â Robinâs halfway through chewing a mouthful of popcorn and the absolute carnage inside her agape mouth makes Steve give her a light shove.
âItâs not polite to talk with your mouth full, yâknow.â
âItâs not polite to blue-ball either!â She shoots back in utter disbelief.
âHow do you think I felt? I was this close,â he holds his thumb and index finger barely millimeters apart, âto sealing the deal.â
She just shakes her head. âYou, Steve Harrington, are a genuine, bonafide idiot.â
Sheâs not telling him anything he doesnât know. Itâs been three days since the aborted fling in the backseat of his car, and heâs barely thought of anything else. Especially since youâve been away from home both of the past nights when heâs called. Heâs starting to worry youâve gotten the wrong impression, that heâs not interested or that heâs toying with you. Itâs the exact opposite. He wants nothing more than to know you in the most intimate way he can know you. But he needs it to be flawless. He needs it to be well thought-out and precisely planned, the most romantic event in the history of copulation. He wonât settle for anything less, not with you. You deserve perfection, and he wonât give you anything less.
âItâs not that I donât want to,â he tries to explain. âI want to more than anything. But if youâre gonna go to town on a goddess, you need to do some worshiping, yâknow? I donât feel like Iâve done enough.â
Your heart pounds in your chest as you hear this admission. You werenât sure what to expectâworried that maybe visiting him at work was an overstepâbut hearing him call you a goddess certainly wasnât on your radar.
âYouâve done more than enough, Steve.â
The sound of your voice makes Steve jump and whirl around, oblivious to Robinâs sly smirk and mumbled excuse of needing to attend to something in the back room.
âH-hey!â He squeaks, then clears his throat in an attempt to get his tone back to its normal octave. âWhat⊠whatâre you doing here?â
âOh, just came to pick up a tape,â you tease. âBut mostly I came to see you.â
âMe?â He takes a moment to ground himself, loosening his too-tight grip on the counter. âI mean⊠I tried to call you last night. And the night before?â
Your brow furrows. âReally? I didnât get your message.â
Because he didnât leave one. He clears his throat and says, âI just figured you were busy.â
âOh, well, I volunteer at the animal shelter on Wednesdays, and last night was my friendâs 21st birthday. Iâm sorry I missed you, though.â
He can tell that youâre really remorseful, and it makes his heart squeeze in his chest a little bit. He plays it off with a dismissive wave of his hand. âNo, itâs fine, itâs⊠are you free tonight?â
You giggle at the abrupt redirect, but heâs played directly into your hand.
âYeah, actually. I was hoping maybe you could help me pick out something for us to watch tonight? If youâre free too, that is.â
His dark eyes blink slowly, wondering if youâre aware of the implication behind your completely innocent words. You. Him. A movie. Alone. Itâs enough to make his head spin.Â
âIâve never been freer.â
Conveniently, youâve come in close enough to the end of his shift that by the time youâre done combing through Family Videoâs vast selection for the perfect film to use as background noise, Steveâs ready to clock out. And since you walked over after finishing your own shift at the local dollar store up the street, it works out perfectly that he can give you a ride straight to his place.
You only glance in the backseat once, but itâs enough to get your mind churning. Remembering the feeling of him, of what couldâve been. Anticipating what will be.
âParents home?â You ask as he pulls into his driveway and parks, trying to sound casual and utterly failing.
âNope,â he answers easily. âTook a detour to Cabo on their way home from Hawaii.â
âSounds glamorous. You opted out?â
âIâd rather be here in Hawkins with you than on a beach alone anyday.â
He must know the effect his words have on you. Surely he can hear the way your heart picks up pace as he looks at you with those dark, affectionate eyes.
âSo⊠this is home.â He waves a hand around the entrance hall like itâs a shabby nightmare, not the grandest house youâve ever been in.
âIâm starting to understand why they used to call you King Steve.â
Heâs almost embarrassed at the mention of that old high school nickname. âTrust me, this isnât why.â
âWell, a palace does befit you,â you tell him with a smirk.
âStop, youâre gonna make me blush.â The wink he shoots you makes your gut erupt with butterflies, a sensation that would normally make you a little uncomfortable. With Steve, youâd take the butterflies all day long.
He gives you a cursory and oversimplified tour of the ground floor before leading you upstairs, and suddenly heâs sheepish. Itâs been a few moons since he shared his room with a girl, so the nerves are justified. But thatâs too simple an explanation. Youâre not a girl. Youâre his dream, his muse, hisâto re-quote himselfâgoddess. No one heâs ever cared about more has stood where youâre standing, and it terrifies him.
He hides it well, though, busying himself with making a comfortable nest for you in his bed before setting up the television set on the dresser against the far wall. If ever there was a time to regain his confidence, itâs now. He curses whatever god there is that he feels like a fumbling virgin in this moment when nothing is even happening, when just the anticipation is enough to make his hands tremble.
Thereâs no more stalling once youâre comfortable and the tape is set to play. His heart pounds to the steady and frantic rhythm of one of those heavy rock songs Dustin listens to now as he sits next to you, hands itching to take a hold of you but also eager not to move too fast.
Almost as if you can sense his hesitation, you reach over and take his hand. âSteve?â
âYeah?â
âKiss me.â
And so he does, and the second his lips slot to yours all the worry and anxiety is gone. Heâs Steve Harrington, and he knows what heâs doing. Youâre you, and heâs wanted this for so long. After years of being lost, he deserves to finally find the love heâs been looking for. Heâs never been so sure of anything as he is, in this moment of initial clarity, that heâs in love with you.
He canât say it, not yet. Heâs sure itâs too soon, and the last thing he wants is to scare you off. But heâs determined to prove it to you, and the only way besides words is action.
He can handle action.
Thereâs no more restraint or hesitation behind his touch. This is it, this is what youâve both been waiting for. Thereâs no way in hell heâs not going to deliver now. Heâs desperate for you, and it shows in the heavy way his hands drag along your curves whilst committing you to memory; the way his tongue languidly swipes across your bottom lip; the way he shifts effortlessly to hover over you even while deepening the kiss.
Heâs overwhelming every single sense of yours in such a sudden fashion, and you wouldnât want it any other way. Especially not when his hips meet yours in a deliciously slow grind and you finally get your first little taste of whatâs to come.
He keens at the little breathless whimpers that leave your mouth, reading every single signal you provide him with and accommodating each. Moaning? He continues what heâs doing, intensifying if deemed necessary. Whining? He adds something, because he knows itâs hard to use your words when youâre wanting so badly. Squirming? He pays attention to the direction of your movement and pulls away or presses closer depending on necessity. Itâs down to science for him; he only really cared about extracurriculars in school anyway, and this was certainly his favorite.
But then he comes to his sensesâwhile he doesnât pull away completely, he needs to clear his mind and he does so by letting up a bit, allowing the kiss to become languid and the heat to extinguish a bit. It only makes you whine more, and Steve curses his damned formula. You shouldnât be part of an equation. Youâre everything heâs ever wanted, and every aspect of your relationship so far has been a new experience for him. He needs this particular activity to be different too. No formulas or calculations. Just you and him and whatever happens naturally.
Clearly you can hear the cogs in his mind turning. You pull away with a concerned look on your face and ask, âwhatâs on your mind?â
Nowâs not the time to hide anything from you, he reasons with himself. He wants to be authentic with you, and part of that means telling the truth, even if itâs not something particularly comfortable.
âIâm⊠falling into a routine. And I donât want to,â he admits. He sighs and leans back, one hand dragging through his shaggy and disheveled hair, sure that heâs going to ruin the mood if he carries on like this. But he refuses to back away from the truth now. âThis⊠itâs always been likeâŠ. Like a series of checkpoints. Boxes to check, yâknow? Kiss you, take your clothes off, make you come, fuck you, say goodnight. And I donât want⊠I canât let it be like that with you. I need this to be⊠real. Not just some list to cross shit off of. I donâtââ
Steve takes a long, shaky breath before he can ramble on anymore. Never has someone so thoroughly gotten under his skin. Heâs never felt so insecure, so unsure. Itâs terrifying. The most terrifying part of it all, though, is that he likes it. He loves the feeling of the unfamiliarity, of doing this right. In a way, itâs almost like heâs doing all of this for the first time all over again. Youâre his first date, first kiss, first time. All because heâs changed so drastically, because heâs not even remotely the same person he was just a year or two ago.
Your hands are so gentle as you cup his face, tenderly forcing his eyes to meet yours.
âSteve⊠we donât have to do this, not if youâre not ready. I want to be with you, not just for this, but for everything. Everything that comes with you⊠thatâs what I want. Thereâs no pressure. I would wait a hundred years for you to be ready so long as I could still have you.â
Steveâs breath shakes a little as he comprehends the gravity of your words. Thereâs nothing he can say that can properly convey the gratitude he holds for your words, so he says nothing at all.
In his silence, you continue. âYouâre more than a body, you know that, right? Youâre funny, and kind, and smart. Yes, smart, donât look at me like that. Youâre everything Iâve ever wanted to be close to. I just⊠I want to spend time with you. I want to watch stupid movies and eat diner food until we get sick and laugh at your stupid jokes⊠and maybe make love with you, sure, but thatâs pretty low on the list as long as I just get to be with you.â
He doesnât notice the tears until itâs too lateâby the time youâre wiping them from the apples of his cheeks itâs far too late to take them back or hide them. With anyone else, he would be angry; at himself, for allowing himself to be so vulnerable. For allowing himself to be so emotional. With you, though⊠with you, his emotions make him feel strong.Â
For the first time since you walked into his life, heâs not scared of losing you.
âI love you,â he tells you. His voice is firm, as fierce as the kiss he presses to your mouth, as powerful as the waves of emotion vibrating through his very soul. âI love you so much.â
He barely gives you a chance to reply, as keen as he is on physically proving his love to you through myriad passionate kisses that leave you breathless. But when you finally get the chance to use your voice after a barrage of kisses that start to trail down your neck, you whisper, âI love you too.â
Four words, and theyâre all he needs to quell every worry or fear heâs had over doing this relationship properly with you. Why should he have to worry, after all, when heâs already succeeded?Â
âI love you,â he whispers as he trails down your neck and to your chest, leaving tender love bites on the tops of your breasts once heâs properly liberated you from your shirt.
âI love you,â he mumbles through sucking a mark a few inches north of your navel.
âI love you,â he murmurs when his lips meet your waistband. His fingers make quick work of your pants as he scatters kisses over your stomach, unable to part his mouth from your skin for even a moment.
âI love you,â he affirms as his mouth meets your hot and waiting core.
Thereâs no more checklist. Because this isnât simply sex, as it always has been for him in the past. This is love-making: the kind of sappy shit they talk about in all those Hallmark movies that he rolls his eyes at the sight of. Itâs like losing his virginity all over again.
He understands the old adage of âthe other halfâ now. Youâve ripped him to shreds and sewed him back together with strands of yourself. The end result is better than the original ever couldâve even dreamed to be. Heâs sure he couldnât possibly live without you now, that losing you would be like ripping out fresh and unhealed stitches.
Youâre not sure how long he camps out between your trembling thighs, but itâs long enough for you to lose count of the number of times he pulls you apartâfirst with his languid tongue; then his long, curved fingers; then a combination of the two. Itâs like he loses himself completely in your pleasure, not a single thought in his head except what he can do to bring you to the edge again, and again, and again.
Youâre trembling with oversensitivity by the time his own needs overtakes his desperation to unravel you. So out of it that you feel drunk, like Steveâs laced you with absolute bliss so pure you can barely stand it.
Youâre hardly present enough to appreciate the adonis before you when he finally undoes his own jeans, and thatâs a damned shame because heâs so damned pretty. Long and thick, flushed at the girthy tip from his hitherto unacknowledged arousal. His lean thighs are pure muscle, and the dark thatch of hair that trails south from his navel makes your mouth water. Heâs everything you dreamed heâd be and so much more.
âSteveâŠâ You donât know what else you can possibly say. All you can do is vainly hope that one whine of his name can convey all of the heat, frustration, tension, and above all longing, swirling through your head in the moment.
He breaks from his lustful reverie for a moment to smile as he leans in for another heated kiss; you think itâs safe to say youâve gotten your point across.
He slows from his mania for a few moments, lips tender as they explore against yours once more. These kisses are languid, slow, yet no less heated. Even now, heâs trying to prove his love to you. As if you could somehow not believe him after everything thatâs happened, every small moment youâve spent with him witnessing how hard heâs trying for you.
Somewhere in between kisses he manages to wrestle a condom out of his nightstand, miraculously without ever breaking from your lips.
Now is where you cut in, finally fading out of your over-pleasured fugue and back to reality. You take the little foil packet from his hands and tear it open, eager for this small chance to finally get a hand or two on him.
He lets out the most gorgeous noise youâve ever heard as you roll the rubber down his length; a deep, earthy, diaphragmatic moan just from the simple touch of your hand. You want to touch him even more, to wrest out more of those sounds from him; to see what other undiscovered responses you can pull from him as you pleasure him. But you know that now, he needs to set the pace. He believes he has something to prove, and youâre more than happy to let him prove it. There will be plenty of other opportunities to have him completely at your mercy, anyway.
Thereâs no way to describe the feeling as he slides into you. Itâs more than bliss, more than euphoria, more than earth-shattering toe-curling mind-altering pleasure. Itâs nothing more than feeling whole. Of never knowing you were missing a part of yourself until itâs suddenly returned to you. Of never knowing what home felt like until this exact moment.
Maybe itâs overdramatic. Maybe itâs outlandish and outrageous and a million other adjectives to feel something so overpowering and overwhelming from such a seemingly simple physical act. But in this moment, you know youâve never felt anything as right as being connected to Steve in this way.
His lips hardly leave yours while he rolls his hips against you, easily finding the perfect angle to make your breath hitch and your hands scrabble for purpose.
It admittedly doesnât last long, but it doesnât have to. Once you start to tighten and pulse around him, heâs a gonerâdeep purposeful thrusts turning to hard, arrhythmic plunges in desperate search of release.
Youâre still shaking from your high when he slowly pulls out of you. He keeps you close, arms linked around your waist and dragging you to lay on his chest as he flops back against the pillows.Â
Youâre not sure how long you lay like that, with Steve whispering sweet nothings into your hair and pressing absentminded kisses to your face. All you can really focus on is one all-consuming, life-changing fact.
âI love you, Steve Harrington.â
âI love you too,â he whispers back. He kisses you again, just a simple peck on your lips, and you know that heâs telling the truth. Itâs an eternal truth: one that canât be changed or altered in any way. Steve Harrington loves you with every fibre of his being, and he will for the rest of his lifeâeven if youâre both blissfully unaware of it for now.
THE END
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Soaring Hearts
Part 5:
Soaring Realizations
Authorâs Note: I am sooooo sorry yâall! đđ I know there hasnât been any updates for a very long time and then I had issues when I tried to upload it the other day. đ€Šââïžđźâđš However, itâs FINALLY here!! đđ I REALLY hope yâall enjoy it and I promise that thereâll be more sooner than this last time! Itâs just so much messed up stuff happened in real life that I wasnât able to do anything/kinda depressed too! AlsoâŠ
HAPPY TURKEY DAY!! đŠ
MINORS DONâT INTERACT!! Rated MA!!
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You woke up sometime in the middle of the night to Hawks lightly snoring next to you. Arm loosely draped around your waist. It was still dark outside so you slowly tippy toed to the bathroom. When you got back, you picked up your phone to check your messages. Fuyumi had messaged you a few hours ago asking if youâd be staying out again.
*âHey girl, Iâm ok. Yes, Iâll be staying out, but Iâll message you in the morning.â*
âHmm, who are you texting?â A pair of arms wrapped around your waist making you jump.
Hawks nuzzles your neck, placing light kisses against your skin. You grip your phone tightly and take a composition breath. Your body already betraying your brain causing you to forget how to talk for a moment.
âJust telling Fuyumi Iâm ok,â you set your phone down and place a kiss on his forehead.
That innocent gesture just gives Hawks the invitation he was looking for and before you realize it, your back is pressed against the bed and his tongue is exploring the depths of your mouth. Both your wrists pinned over your head and he gazes down at your flushed face. You were still completely naked from your love making earlier, your lovely breasts hypnotically heaving with excitement. He smirked at the dozens of hickeys that he left on your neck, shoulders, and chest. He knew youâd be upset later at him for that later, so heâd admire his handy work now. He licked his lips looking at the hard pebbles of your nipples, knowing how sweet they tasted.
As he studied you underneath him, you couldnât help but do the same. His handsome face was flushed and his eyes dark with need. His wings partly spread out behind his back. You wondered if they were sensitive at all to touch. Dirty things ran through your mind as you looked up at the adonis of a man. You could feel the heat between your thighs start to grow warmer and you subconsciously squirmed underneath him. A devious smirk crept onto his face as he leaned down and started kissing and licking the sensitive parts of your neck again. You gasped, your body still ultra sensitive from your previous activities.
âWhatâs on your mind, love?â Hawks whispers into your ear fanning the already burning fire in your loins.
âHawâŠKeigoâŠâ You whimper out, not wanting to say whatâs on your mind.
âHmmm?â He tilts his head slightly to the side with the devilish grin still on his face.
He starts to place light kisses all over your body. Your neck. Your shoulders. Your chest purposefully missing your nipples. Slowly down your abdomen. Your heart skips a beat as he nuzzles your belly. Placing more light kisses around your navel. Ever so slowly lower. Youâre practically soaking when Hawks spreads your legs open. He places light kisses on the inside of your left thigh all the way down your ankles then starts at your right ankle kissing his way back upwards. He then places the lightest kisses ever on your soaked folds.
âFuckâŠyouâre already *dripping * for me down here!â His voice so deep you barely recognized it.
Before you could reply, Hawks gently started lapping at your soaking cunt making you squeal. He let out a low growl as his tongue dove deeper inwards grazing your over sensitive bud. You could feel your legs already start to shake in his hands as continued to devour you. His tongue leaving no crevice undiscovered. You could feel your peak already getting close. Hawks tongue swirling at your entrance, giving a few teasing pokes then sucking on your clit sent you over the edge. The knot in your belly snapped and you came practically screaming his name, but he didnât stop even when you came down from your high.
âKeâŠKeigo! PlâŠplease! Too much!â You manage to sob out, but he didnât seem to hear or care. He kept going.
Hawks was utterly lost in your taste. He could taste himself and something in his brain snapped as he lapped your combined juices from between your legs. Somewhere in his brain, he registered that you had came, but he didnât want to stop eating you out. Even when you cried it was too much or when you started tugging on his hair. He was way too engrossed in your favor to cease what he was doing. He wanted to taste *all* of you. He spread your legs as wide as they could go and slid his hungry tongue deep into your spasming hole worming its way as deep as he could. You started to cry louder and kick your legs, squirming uncontrollably.
âKEI! Please stop! Iâm gonnaâŠâ You cry out as your whole body was wracked with the most mind numbing orgasm yet. Your juices shooting all over Hawks face, chest, and onto his sheets.
It was then that the pro hero decided youâd had enough and came up from between your trembling legs. He licked the juices he could from himself as you laid there, a shaking mess. Your arm covering your face in embarrassment. You couldnât believe you squirted! Youâd never done that before ever in your life. You thought that was just something in porn movies. You felt the weight shift on the bed and peaked from under your arm to see Hawks grinning down at you ear from ear.
âDamn, love, that was so fucking *sexy*! You made such a lovely mess,â He had this dark, predatory look in his eyes still.
You let out a surprised yelp as you were repositioned onto the winged heroâs lap. His cock was already hard and leaking precum from the swollen tip. It was heavy against your inner thigh as Hawks brought your lips down to his for a searing kiss. You could taste yourself on his tongue as it explored the depths of your mouth. His calloused hands hungrily groping your breasts. You grasp his shoulders to steady yourself against his onslaught.
âNow, y/n, I want you to be a good girl and ride me,â he gives you a kiss on your neck, his voice getting slightly huskier, âIâd *really * love that from my little sparrow.â
Your mouth goes dry and your mind goes blank. You just merely nod and position your trembling body over his. He lets out a slight hiss as you grab the base of his swollen cock and slowly sink yourself down. Even though heâs had you over and over, youâre still so tight as he slowly stretches you full. You let out little sobs of bliss as he deliciously fills you up all the way to your cervix, digging little crescents into his shoulders when heâs finally bottomed out inside you.
âKeigoâŠso full!â You gasp out as you give a few experimentally motions of your hips. Your head tossed back in utter pleasure as you gradually start to gain your clumsy rhythm.
âFuck, y/n! You feel soooo good, love!â Hawks grits his teeth as he tries to let you set the tempo, but youâre inexperienced and the movements are a bit slow. However, it still feels amazing despite that and he could be patient with you for a little bit longer.
You, though, were already at your limit. Your thighs were burning and your hips sore from earlier, but you couldnât stop your hips from moving. It just felt too good to stop. You could already feel the knot in your stomach starting to tighten and the lewd noises that filled the room spurred you on even more. Hawks hands settled on your hips and his golden hair clinging to his forehead from the sweat forming on his brow. Without warning, Hawks hips shot up and his tip hits that right spot inside you, then again, and again. He must be getting impatient with your slow pace. You look at his face; his eyes a shot tight, brow knitted, and he had his bottom lip between his teeth.
You couldnât help it and started bursting out laughing which caused the pro hero under you to come to a dead stop. He peered at you with the most comical âwhat-the-fuckâ face which really didnât help you stop laughing. You didnât know what came over you.
âHahaâŠIâm sorry! But that face you wereâŠhahaâŠmakingâŠ! Iâm sorry!,â You tried to take a few deep breaths to stop the giggles coming out of your mouth.
When you finally did stop, you peered up at Hawks to see the most terrifying predatory look in his eyes. It was the look that made you feel like a little cotton tail stuck in the sights of a predator. You felt goose bumps all run over your skin when Hawks slowly licks his lips and he gives your hips a hard squeeze. A loud cry fell from your lips when his hips shot up hard into you, causing your toes to curl. A few more expert thrusts upwards had you babbling mess on his lap already close to coming undone. His lips smashed over yours as he continued to pound into your clenching hole.
â âM cumming! Ahh haaa! KEIGO!â You sob as you ride out your climax. Hawks had the biggest shit eating grin on his face as he watched you cum.
He didnât even bother to pull out of you before he flipped you over on your back. Making you whimper from over sensitivity from just cumming. Hawks pinned both your wrists to the bed with two of his feathers as he used his arms to keep from crushing you. A third feather made its way downwards and settled on your clit making your whole body jump.
âWhaâŠWait! Keigo! I just came! I canâtâŠAHHHH!â You were cut off by the vibrations he sent into the feather stimulating your clit.
If you could think a coherent thought at this point, youâd feel bad if heâd had any neighbors because you were practically screaming as Hawks started thrusting into into again. The sensation made you forget how to breathe for a moment because it was too overwhelming. His cock was buried as deep as it could go inside you that every time he pushed himself back inside he kept kissing the entrance to your womb and the feather working your poor clit was only driving you crazier.
âHaâŠWhat was that about my face, love?â Hawks grunted as he fucked you stupid, âYou should see yours! But I ainât laughing, itâs amazing! So freaking sexy losing your mind for me like that!â
He bit his lip hard as he fought back spilling his load as You clamped down on his dick when you came. Your legs shook hard as you arched your back off the bed chanting his name over and over again. Hawks burned that image of you into his brain. A withering, bawling mess all because of him. He smirked as he watched you try to break your wrists free of his feathers whimpering as he continued to thrust into you without mercy.
âKeiâŠPlâŠplease! TooâŠahhhâŠmuch! Oh gawd! Keigo please!â Tears falling down your lovely cheeks as you begged him to let up, but he wasnât done just yet.
Hawks could feel himself so close, he knew it wouldnât be long especially how you were spasming around his cock like that. He let out an almost feral growl as he felt his own release quickly approaching but not before drawing one more from you. This was your punishment for laughing at him after all. You were sobbing, crying his name as he pounded you into oblivion. The feather on your swollen clit moving faster in time with his thrusts bringing you closer and closer to yet another orgasm. Hawks practically howled, unable to fight it any longer, as he shot his load deep inside you sending you over the edge at the same time. Hot thick ropes of cum filling you to the brim all over again as you rode out your high.
Hawks finally sets you free of his feathers and presses his forehead on yours as you both struggle to catch your breath. His wings coming around you, cradling you, as if caging you both from the outside world. You wrap your arms loosely around his neck and you hear him give an approving hum.
âAs much as Iâd love to lay here. We probably should get into the bath and eat something,â Hawks smiles down at you, âWouldnât want âcha to pass out because of me. I think your uncle would barbecue me for sure!â
You let out a weak laugh as Hawks gets up and makes his way to the bathroom. Missing his warmth, you snuggle under the blanket, waiting for the bath to be ready. The scent of both of you mixed together oddly comforted you and made you feel embarrassed. Thinking about your time with Hawks was honestly the happiest youâve been in awhile not including the really potent sexual connection between you. Something like dejavu kept going off in your head when you looked at him. However, you were pretty sure youâd remember meeting him since there werenât very many pro heroes with bright red wings.
A few minutes later, youâre sitting in the bath with him, your back pressed against his chest as he holds you close, his chin resting on top of your head. His wings draped outside the tub, so the both of you had room. Hawks insisted on both of you bathing together, promising to behave himself. You slowly traced your fingers over the surface of the water. Hawksâs eyes were closed, his usual wild blonde hair wet and smoothed back from his face.
âKeigo?â You broke the silence in the room.
Not bothering to open his eyes, âHm?â
âHave we, um, met before?â You didnât know why you felt so nervous all of a sudden.
âWeâve met a few times in fact, Y/N,â You could feel the laughter in his voice vibrate against your back.
âI mean, like when we were kids?â You turn the best you could to look up at him.
His golden eyes now open and he had a grin on his face, âSo you finally remember, huh?â
You didnât exactly know what the look on his face pissed you off, but it did. So you werenât just tripping out, you had met before your arrival a couple of months ago! And what was worse is he remembered and didnât say a damn thing!
âOh my gawd! Seriously?!â You splashed him in the face, wiping that grin off his face. Victory!
âHey! Iâm sorry! I wasnât a 100% we had and didnât want to come off as a creep!â He held his hands up to shield his face from your onslaught. A sigh leaving his lips when you stopped.
âToo late for thatâŠâ You huffed out, feeling dumb for not realizing it sooner, âHow long did you know?â
âIt was at the park,â A slight blush dusts his cheeks as he purposefully avoids looking you in the eyes, âWhich made me realize something elseâŠâ
âWhatâs that?â You tilt your head inquisitively, smiling at how cute he looked at that moment.
Hawksâs lips come down and gently slid over yours, passionately melting together. His hands coming up and delicately cupped your face, deepening the kiss. It was a soft kiss compared to others you shared, but the intensity behind it made your heart skip a beat. It seemed like time had stopped in that moment until Hawks lifted his face away from yours.
âIâm utterly and completely in love with you.â
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