Chills Right to the Marrow Part 13
part 1, prev part
There’s this feeling at the top of a roller coaster that is meant to excite, to look forward to. Where the exhilaration and adrenaline kicks in and everyone feels like the top of the world. Only for the calm to set in when the ride is over, and the line keeps growing to feel it all again.
If life were a rollercoaster, Dustin’s would be a fucked up one. Where just as the drop finishes, and everything seems to calm down, the machine starts to clink and bring you back up to the top again. Over. And Over. And Over again.
Dustin’s scared that this calm won’t be so calm tomorrow. Or in a year when life gets back to normal again, and the people in hospital are out and better, like it does. Just for it all to go to a burning pile of shitty hell. For Dustin to end up sitting in the hospital chairs again.
Never the bed.
It’s not that he’s upset that he’s healthy. It’s not that he’s upset that he’s never had to stay in the hospital for a night. It’s just the fact that while everyone else seems to get hurt, he stays perfectly fine. And he doesn’t know why.
He’s put himself in dangerous situations. Fights, tunnels, right in front of a fucking demogorgon. In all the scenarios, he should have gotten hurt. There wasn’t a book that he read where everyone walked away perfectly fine.
Frodo walked to Mordor and wasn’t fine. Neither was Samwise. Dustin’s not a Frodo or a Samwise, maybe he’s a Mary or Pippin. They didn’t walk away without a scratch either. His DnD character can’t even get out of a battle without dying.
Why is he so okay? Why have his dice always rolled so high?
And why does he seem to be more bothered that this than the people in the hospital beds?
Max is smiling and laughing right now. She’s almost like she was last summer. Making fun of them in a way that kinda stung sometimes but mostly was out of love. Not thinking about the fact that she might never ride a skateboard again. Not thinking about the fact that she won’t see the way their faces change as they grow. The way her own face will change as she grows.
Her life has changed in a way that can’t be changed back. How is she not having a bigger reaction to this?
“Hey,” Max calls out in Dustin’s direction. “Come here, I want to feel your face.”
“Huh?”
Mike groans from across the room. “She’s been doing it with everyone. It’s just an excuse to mess with you.”
Max rolls her clouded eyes. “The blind girl wants to make sure he friends are ok. There are no other ulterior motive here.”
“You’re just going to poke him in the eye or some shit.”
“My hands are my eyes now, Michael.”
Mike rolls his eyes, giving Dustin a look like “I warned you.”
Lucas gets up from the chair closest to Max to let Dustin get closer. He leans closer to the bed as Max reaches out her hands to find his face. She pokes around, finding the brim of his hat and pulls it down to his nose.
“Idiot,” Max snorts.
“Told you,” Mike says. Will smacks him in the arm.
Dustin makes a face while fixing his hat, switching seats with Lucas. And then again when El comes in. The room sounding anything like a hospital. Like Mike’s basement while they are watching movies or hanging out. Like the worst didn’t happen and just a week ago, where Max wasn’t just told she would be blind forever.
He walks out of the room and heads to Eddie’s. Eddie who’s awake, but not really. Who opens his eyes and it makes Dustin so happy. Just to see something that resembles him, but isn’t just quite it.
Happiness comes and goes so fast that Dustin almost misses it. Overshadowed by this feeling of knowing that nothing is going back to the way it was. He’ll never be the person he was before. None of them will.
That’s the worst part of this all. He’s seen the way that Will became quieter. Different in a way that none of them will really understand. Saw the way that Max shut down after Billy died. Overcome by her grief. How Steve pushes himself so hard he breaks, and Robin tries to forget it all even happened. Saw how pain can cause a person to die.
The doctors still don’t know what’s going to happen when Eddie finishes waking up. They won’t know how long he’ll still be here, or what damage is in his body. To his brain. His nerves. If he’ll be able to play guitar again. Dustin never even got to see him play a real concert. He wanted to see that.
Time keeps passing and Eddie’s missing it. Classes have restarted and he won’t catch up. Not when he’ll still be in recovery for months. He won’t be walking across that stage to get his diploma. He might not even get it at all.
Dustin takes his seat next to Wayne and just looks at Eddie. Can’t bring himself to take the book out of his bag and read. Wanting to find any sign that this was all worth it. That the painful hope that Dustin is clinging to isn’t dragging him to the bottom. That Eddie will continue to wake up tomorrow.
“You ok, Dustin?”
“Every day I come in here and wish he would say something. Anything.”
Wayne nods, as solemn as he always is. “Me too.”
“You’re back in school now, right? How’s that going?”
School is a completely different battle. The Hellfire shirt that he wore with pride is now an endless target. The insults that would already be slung his way amplified. Walking through the halls feels like shooting range. Another reminder that he knows a truth that none of them will.
“As good as you’d expect it to.”
Another nod. It’s nice to have someone listen to him without trying to fix it. Just let him talk at his own pace without trying to make it better. Make him feel any differently than he does. It brings a comfort to Dustin that he never really knew, or understands.
“Where’s that book of yours, I was starting to get invested.”
“I’m not sure I’m up for reading it today.”
Wayne shrugs. “Why don’t I then? I can’t do the voices like you or Ed do, but I can read.”
It’s like Wayne knows the real reason why Dustin’s reading the book. Makes him feel weirdly seen. Like for a moment, someone understood him more than he wanted them too.
Still, he takes the book out of his bag and hands it to Wayne. Watches as he turns to the page and messes up the character names. Take a breath each time one of the weirder ones comes up and sounds it out. Trying his best to get it all right, even though he’s still doing it a little wrong.
Next part
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Omg you have so many dragon requests but I have to add. Do you think you could write head canons about how it would be for the fellowship include a reader with a dragon companion? If not the fellowship then Frodo x reader with a dragon companion. Sorry if that’s confusing. I’m a confusing girl 🤷♀️ I love your writing and I hope your doing well ❤️❤️❤️
Thank you so much for the compliment :D I went with the entire fellowship but did focus relatively more on Frodo (somewhat). I honestly like the dragon requests but I always think too much into what do you guys imagine the dragon as so I try not to specify too much. I hope you like it :)
(This is not proofread so I apologise for any grammar mistakes. If you find any please point them out)
~Cipresa <3
Fellowship with a reader who has a dragon companion
-I think that in general they would all be scared at first, except Gandalf who has seen similar things in the distant past.
-I think Aragorn would be the first to accept the fact that there's a dragon in their company.
-Second would be either Marry and Pippin or Legolas, for for the latter I can't quite decide since he did fight in the Battle of Five armies and has seen the damage dragon's flame did to his father, but then again with his personality he would be more understanding and would eventually make peace with the dragon.
-Frodo and Sam wouldn't be that thrilled, especially Sam since he can get quite worried but would put up a brave front for Frodo, and Frodo, while wary due to the stories about Smaug Bilbo told him, would still be quite quick to accept, especially due to his curiosity taking over.
-Boromir and Gimli would be the last. GimlI would hold his ground and call the dragon every name under the sun until the very end, and would accept the dragon only after realising how helpful the “overgrown lizard” is in battle. Boromir would be fascinated but also not thrilled, though he couldn't wait to tell Faramir about it one he returns home (he doesn't die in this because I said so)
-Mary and Pippin would use the dragon in their pranks, oddly enough the dragon would comply with them.
-Everyone did start appreciating the warmth that radiated off of the dragon and the fact that they didn't have to carry all the luggage
-The dragon adored Gandalf and ended up acting like an overgrown cat with him.
-The dragon didn't like Frodo at first due to him being the ring bearer, but eventually got over it after you scolded him. Frodo managed to bargain with him by secretly giving him snacks and you started wondering why you precious companion was gaining weight and suddenly started being around Frodo more. Once you caught on you banned Frodo from feeding the dragon which resulted in the overgrown fire lizard sulking.
-At the battle of black gate they saw the dragons full potential when it burned the orcs by thousands, frying them completely, and they started respecting it even more.
-I think after everything is over Frodo and Aragorn would over to to live there, if you chose Shire, the kids there would be using the dragon as a playground, of you chose Minas Tirith then the dragon would be the guardian of the city
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