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#me: uhhhhhh i don't…….. really do All That :
inkskinned · 2 years
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this is sort of pathetic, but when you were younger, you were sort of puzzled by the cartoon representations of fathers: how a kid would be outside with a mitt, waiting to play catch.
it's not that your father never played catch with you, but you also didn't like when he did. something about a hard ball coming quickly towards your face doesn't seem exciting. not that you'd ever say you don't trust him. you trust him, right?
it's not like he never tried to teach you anything. or never tried to parent. on rare days, a strange person would walk in your father's skin. bright, happy, magnificent. this version of your father was so cheerful and charismatic that you would do anything to keep him. and this is the version of your father that would laugh and gently coax you try again. this is the version of your father that would break down the small elements of a problem and point them out so you have an easier time with them.
as a kid, those days happened more often. but somewhere around 11, you started being too much of a person, and he was often cross about it. when he'd try to sit you down to learn something, you spent the whole time with your shoulders around your ears, nervous, uncertain. terrified because you didn't immediately understand how to navigate something. worried you will run out of his goodwill and then you will have the Other Father back, and you will have ruined a good day for your entire family. something about you being visibly afraid - it just made him angry. he would accuse you of not wanting to learn and storm away.
on tv, it's not like there's a lot of versions of men-who-are-mostly-fathers. they can be good dads, but usually their stories are not told in the household. so it's normal that your father is there, but he's never around. you know he was in the house, somewhere, it's just not that you guys ever... "hung out". he just seemed to get kind of bored of you, annoyed you weren't made in his perfect image. frustrated with how much energy it took to raise a kid. over time, you kind of adopt a bittersweet band around your throat - he knows nothing about me. he says at least i never abandoned my family.
and it's technically - technically - true. he was there for you. sometimes he even made an effort and made it to the big moments; the graduations and the dance recitals. he grins and tells everyone that he taught you. it almost erases the days in between, where he complains because you need a ride to school. the weeks that go by where he doesn't actually ever speak to you. the times you say i am struggling and he says figure it out on your own. i can't help you.
and that's fine! that's all fine. you can call him if you are having a problem with your car. or if you need a ride to the hospital. he loves playing hero, he just doesn't like the actual work that comes with being a father. and you've kind of made your peace with that; because you had to, because you don't want to live your life like he does; the whole world at a managed distance, a little rotating and controlled orb he can witness and take credit for but never truly love.
as an adult, you are rewatching some dumb cartoon - and again, the child standing in the rain, with a mitt, waiting for their father to come play catch. as an adult, there's this strange creeping dread - this little thing? this little thing, and their dad can't even show up for that? oh god, holyshit, it's not about the mitt, is it. oh god, holyshit, your father spent most of your life leaving you hanging.
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hidefdoritos · 10 days
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I just cleaned the fridge un-completely.
Milk spilled. I let it crust up, then I wiped it all out. I wiped down everything it got on.
And then I...stopped.
I didn't go through the condiments to throw out everything my landlady let expire.
I didn't wipe down the upper shelves or the door shelves.
I didn't deal with the veggies I should be cooking up for dinner.
I. Just. Stopped.
And I crossed it off my to-do list anyway.
:)
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inniave · 4 months
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pharmacies should automatically give you (or at the very least offer) naloxone any time you get an opioid prescription
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tafadhali · 1 year
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Got hit by a car today
I'm totally fine (if sore) but having someone accelerate into your fragile human body feels really personal
Also having a ton of lawyers and like everyone you're doing jury duty with see and hear you get hit by a car (crying "Why did you do that to me???") as you head into jury duty is a real way to start a day
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imwritesometimes · 5 months
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I have such a neat idea for a mother's day cake I just hope I can pull it off 😵‍💫
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girlscience · 1 year
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finished Harrow the Ninth. Gideon is still the only thing I care about whatsoever (I do love Harrow, but it's different, Gideon makes me want to explode). Spent the whole book just waiting for her to be back (ya ya part of it was her pov watching Harrow but it wasn't Her her ya know) and she finally came back and I almost cried. Genuinely, she is EVERYTHING to me
#I didn't like God and then I was kind of warming to him and now I hate him thank fuck. I don't like liking God lol#I was pretty meh on the old lyctors. They got some funny moments but that was kind of all I felt for them#For the few paragraphs I've known her I like Pyrrha#Ianthe I have complicated feelings about. On the one hand I do really enjoy seeing a fucked up women just be fucked up#and she is so nasty and that's great.... But I honestly went into it thinking (based on fandom) that I would end up loving her and I don't#not even as a love to hate or grudging love. I actually think she sounds gross? Which I appreciate!! Don't get me wrong. I like a gross lady#but just the way she's described and the way she acts she almost makes me uncomfortable. like makes my skin crawl sort of vibe#which is super cool cause I honestly don't get that often. She feels slimy. Which is not a thing women are often#so like. I like her A Lot as a character. But I don't actually like Her. if that makes sense#also I think most fanart makes her wayyyyyy too attractive#uhhhhhh the ghosts were fun but I don't really have strong feelings about them in any direction#hmmmm other thoughts... these books don't help with my desire to get rid of all my possessions. being a nun of the ninth house sounds great#which i don't really think is a take away i'm supposed to be getting from this lol#other than that i am just spinning in circles in my head chanting gideon gideon gideon gideon gideon gideon gideon gideon gideon
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stirdrawsandreblaws · 3 months
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to-do tomorrow:
lil' bit of morning ddr before meds
voting research for the congressional primaries coming up on june 25th, since there's a lot of other stuff on that locally
finish correcting state documentation on file with two departments
call planned parenthood abt extending my hrt prescription (assuming i can get someone to sit with me while i do it)
do the code review i was supposed to do today but too tired brain mush happened
finish drawing cursby
if i manage at least three of these i'll consider the day won tbh but i'm optimistic abt doing all six
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travalerray · 7 months
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fanfic writing is always like:
questionable characterisation (not really familiar yet) => oh this is actually good => questionable characterisation (projecting)
#looking at my m/dzs fics and uh#uhhhhhh#J/C and L/WJ are the biggest victims of this#which is why I make a point to revisit the novel when I can esp for longfics#but sometimes I go back and see ''oh I really wrote this one shot well. Perhaps my writing at the beginning was actually good?'' and get#slapped in the face by four idiots and the City of ghosts#now that I think about it. Writing L/XC consistently as having an overprotective complex over his didi and writing W/WX having a weird#complex over his shidi is making me laugh so much#kk's rambles tag#having written and changed my opinions about the characters during the course of a singular fic only happened for tainted Ambitions#so you have the strange shift from the revenge fantasy drama to something that might actually be compelling if done well#(I want to do it well but I don't want to touch b/nha with a ten foot pole these days. Not because of the fandom but because I don't like#the source material anymore. Controversial opinion but anyways)#my opinions about dg/rp didn't change much during fic writing nor did the characterisation change that much#even if it has the second highest fic count after m/dzs. Hm.#probably because i mostly write for it as a writing exercise#and the one I did start as a proper fic is abandoned because I lost energy#(my personal opinion is that my j/c POV is the most suited to my writing due to my tendency to make similar protagonists in my original#works. It's a little funny because his manner of speech in his internal narrative is plenty similar to both Romila and Rajanya in the#''why in the ever living Fuck'' even if they all have different motives.#or maybe I am too used to writing cranky people with unresolved and unrequited love. Anyways)
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alllgator-blood · 6 months
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I posted these on reddit a while ago and I've gotten multiple messages asking if I had any other social media? Which I didn't at the time, but after years of not bothering to post my art I think that was the boost I needed to finally re-emerge from the rock I've been living under.
ANYWAY uhhhhhh I've drawn these guys so much since I posted this that they might look a little different when I eventually post my newer art of them. Mostly because I don't bother drawing the little crosses on their heads anymore besides on leshy because frankly the antennae are really funny. If anyone has any questions about my hcs or what I intend to do with the characters, my ask box is open and I don't have anything better to do than endlessly ramble about gods that 100% would rip my head off immediately if I ever encountered them!
SPEAKING OF WHICH, the reception I got for these on reddit was way more positive than I was expecting which I am immensely grateful for, but there was definitely some miscommunication about the afab shamura headcanon so I'm just gonna dump about that below the cut if you want to hear me ramble about my nonbinary-ness for a while:
OKAY SO it's canon that the bishops were feral little animals before they found their crowns, right? Leshy and Shamura both talk about it during their follower quests. Feral animals do not have a concept of gender, only biological sex, so if they ascended to sapient godhood they would suddenly have a grasp of gender. My hc is that Shamura was a female feral spider, ascended to godhood, lost their bio sex in the process as with all the other bishops, and was just like "you know what? I don't want to be anything. This is kinda swag actually" so they just became War and Grief and Cosmic Horror incarnate. I am fucking desperate for any relatable enby representation in the media I like, so I just want to clarify me saying they were female at some point just is me going "I am living vicariously through this character who shed their mortal flesh prison to be an eldritch spider war god devoid of any sex characteristics" and not "I'm one of those numerous people who for some reason lumps this canonically agender character in with a binary sex". Anyway thank you for reading this far, here's an unfinished voidpunk shamura from a pride flag color palette thing I did of the bishops:
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helen-with-an-a · 6 months
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I am an Adult pt 3.5
Hi. So I wanted to a sub-chapter kinda thing about Lena's side of the relationship/first few months etc. So here it is. Also shout out to the anons who gave me some inspo for this - u really helped. Also, I would like to preface this by saying I don't really know much about the Wolfsburg team as a whole, so if anything's wrong please let me know.
In this fic - the bold text is meant to be in German (but I didn't want bascially the whole thing to be unreadable for people) so just imagine it's in German
Barca Femeni x Reader / Lena Oberdorf x Reader / VfL Wolfsburg x Lena Oberdorf
Description: R and Lena's relationship from Lena's perspective
Word Count: 2.7k
Part 1 : Part 2 : Part 3 : Part 3.5 : Part 4 : Part 5 : Part 6 : Part 7 : Epilogue
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Lena was too smiley. That was the first thing Jule noticed after the Barca match. The hotel they were staying in was nice, the weather was very warm compared to Wolfsburg, and the day off was well deserved.
“What’s up with you?” She asked her best friend, eyeing her suspiciously.
“Huh? Oh, nothing,” Lena dismissed her as she fell onto her bed, phone in her hand.
“Speaking English now, are we?” Jule teased, studying Lena. She had a slight flush to her skin that wasn’t there this morning. She seemed too happy for someone who had just been ‘exploring’ all day. “What did you do today?”
“Nothing … uh, nothing much; I just wandered ‘round a bit,” Lena said distractedly. Jule hummed in false agreement. Something was going on.
A gasp pulled Jule from her inspection. It was Lena, staring joyfully at her phone before hurriedly typing away. Ok, something was most definitely going on, and Jule was going to find out what and soon.
“I’m going …” Lena cleared her throat and shook her head as if to shake away the English. “I’m going to go shower … uh … yeh.” She gathered up her stuff and headed to the attached bathroom, leaving her phone on the bed. Perfect, it was time to snoop; Jule congratulated the universe on its opportunistic timing.
[Initial]💙❤️: SPOTIFY LINK – One Direction, ‘I Should Have Kissed You’:  https://www.spotify......
L💚: SPOTIFY LINK – Odeal, ‘Next Time’: https://www.spotify.......
Who was ‘[Initial]💙❤️’ ? And why were they sending Lena a link to old One Direction songs? Specifically, ‘I Should Have Kissed You’? And why was Lena sending a song back telling them ‘next time’? The bathroom door opened a little.
“Jule, did I leave my phone?”
“Uhhhhhh, yeh, you did. Here,” Jule quickly locked Lena’s phone and rushed to hand it to her.
“Gracias,” Lena said absentmindedly, closing the door again. Spanish? Since when did Lena speak Spanish?
Slowly, the pieces slid into place for Jule. Lena had been out all day. Lena came back too happy and constantly looking at her phone. Lena replied in English and Spanish. Lena had received a text telling her that someone should have kissed her. Lena responded with the promise of next time. Lena was definitely on a date.
It wasn’t confirmed for Jule until the return leg. Much like in Barcelona, Lena disappeared all day and reappeared, looking far too happy the day after. She definitely went on another date.
“So,” Jule said as she cornered Lena in the locker room during recovery. “How was your date?”
“Oh, it was great. We went-” Lena froze. How did Jule know about her date? “W-what date?” Lena tried to cover slip up. Jule grinned devilishly, refusing to let Lena weasel her way out of this questioning.
“You know, your date with the Barca player,” she laughed at Lena’s horrified expression.
“I didn’t … What … me? No … I don’t,” Lena rubbed the back of her neck, trying to hide the dark blush adorning her cheeks.
“Don’t lie to me, Lena Sophie! I am your best friend. You went on a date, 2 dates, and didn’t tell me,” Jule said, slightly hurt that Lena didn’t trust her with this. It was well known that Lena didn’t do dates; she didn’t do the emotional side of romance. She flirted, she charmed, and she took people home – only to have them leave the next morning, often not quite remembering their name when the sun rose. To see her friend finally consider a date, multiple dates - and maybe something more – Christmas had come early for Jule Brand.
“What d-” Lena started to deny, but after seeing Jule’s face, she knew she was caught. She sighed before spilling her happiest secret, “She asked me after the Barca match if I wanted to see some stuff in Barcelona. It was such a good time. We went to breakfast, and she made me try all these Spanish and Catalonian pastries. Then, she showed me all the tourist spots. She took me to lunch and stuff and then showed me all the quieter places she likes to go. Then, we ended with dinner, and it was just, ugh. So, so perfect.” Jule smiled, liking this side of Lena she hadn’t seen before. “And then, we so nearly kissed when she walked me back to the hotel and then she sent me a song telling me she wanted to kiss me and,” Lena sighed dreamily. “And we’ve been texted and phoning and whatnot, but I asked her out after our match on Sunday, and we went to the Christmas Market, even though it’s only November because she mentioned she’d never been to one before, and we ate far too much and then …” Lena paused, the romantic gushing so uncharacteristic of her. “She kissed me. She kissed me, Jule. And it was so perfect, and, ugh…” she trailed off again. “I’ve never felt like this before,” she whispered, grinning to herself as she confessed.
“She sounds wonderful, Lena. But who is ‘she’?” Jule teased lightly, nudging her best friend.
“Um … Y/N. The number 17 put 2 past us on Sunday,” Lena smiled as she said your name, a lovesick expression taking over. “She’s got this smile and, god, her laugh. It’s like angels or something. She so, so beautiful, Jule.” Lena gushed. Jule hadn’t seen Lena like this, ever, but she wasn’t opposed to the in-love ramblings. She liked this side of Lena and hoped she would stay for a long while. “But she’s also funny, and kind, and sweet, and just … she’s already picking up German for me. I didn’t even ask her to; she just turned up here, and at the Market, she went to ask a seller about this piece of jewellery, and it was in pretty decent German. She was so cute, she got all blushy and shy afterwards and…” she sighed again. Her fingers coming to fiddle with the woven bracelet on her wrist – a gift from you to remember you by. Like she could ever forget you.
“Wow, Lena. When can I meet the girl that’s got you so lovesick?” Jule teased gently, bumping her shoulder against Lena’s.
“Not for a while, sorry, Jule. It’s just, it’s all so new, and we haven’t really discussed what we are yet, and we won’t be able to see each other for a while because of our schedules and, um…” Lena had the decency to look slightly embarrassed at her response, but she loved the idea of being able to keep you all to herself for a little while.
“No, I get it, no worries,” Jule smiled understandingly. “I can see that she makes you happy, and that’s all that matters,” she added, squeezing Lena’s hand at her words. “But I will require regular updates from you about how things are going, ok? ‘Cos … my best friends in loooove,” she sang out, laughing at Lena’s bright blush.
“Yeh, yeh, let’s go to recovery, c’mon,” Lena said, shoving her friend out of the empty changing room.
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[Initial]💙❤️: I want to tell them about u x
L💚: Tell em
L💚: Can I tell my team?
[Initial]💙❤️: Omg yesssss xxxxxxxxxxxx
Lena had permission from you to tell the team, and she was so, so happy about it. Telling Jule made everything feel so much more real; she couldn’t imagine how telling the team would go. She figured she’d start with the girls she was closest with.
Jule, Ewa, and Sveindis all gathered in her living room as Lena stood nervously in front of the TV.
“Um, so … I have something I need to tell you guys,” Lena said, fidgeting with the hem of her t-shirt. Why was she so nervous? She loved the idea of being able to take you out on dates without hiding anything; she wanted to be in the crowd when watching your matches; she wanted to kiss you in front of the whole world … and yet she was nervous about this. If she had to guess, she would say it’s because she hasn’t done this before. She doesn’t date, and she’s never had to introduce her teammates to a partner before, but here she was, about to burst your little bubble of private joy. You had told her you’d done it already – or at least, you didn’t discourage the team when they snooped and didn’t stop them from guessing.
“Oh, my god. Are you leaving?” Sveindis asked.
“What? No!” Not yet, anyway. Lena replied.
“Are you dying?” Ewa countered. Lena was slightly shocked at her question.
“Ewa!” Lena gasped.
“Are you pregnant then? Did something happen? Are you ok?” Sveindis sat up, full of concern for her friend.
“No, good God, no. No, I’m fine.” Lena looked horrified that that was what her best friend’s brain jumped to.“I … I just needed to tell you that I have a girlfriend…” There was a split second of silence before Sveindis and Ewa burst into hysterical laughter. Lena looked towards Jule, unsure of the scene in front of her.
“Yeh, right. Good one, L.” Sveindis joked between peals of laughter.
“A girlfriend, nice one, Lena” Ewa wheezed.
“Guys,” Jule tried. She could see Lena’s face fall. When Lena had invited them to come over this afternoon, she had been so excited—she could finally share with her friends, her family, that she had a girlfriend—an actual, real girlfriend who treated her well and made her oh-so-happy. And now they were laughing at her. Was the idea of her being in a relationship so comedic that it brought tears to their eyes?
“You know what, fuck you. Get out, get out now.” Lena shouted, causing an immediate cease to the laughter.
“Lena, c’mon. That was a good joke -” Ewa started.
“It wasn’t a joke. I have a girlfriend. And I wanted to tell you today, but you think it’s basically impossible for me to have one. So, Get. Out!”
“Are you serious?” Sveindis asked.
“Get the fuck. Out. Of my House.” Lena replied, moving to open the door for them.
“Not about that, about having a girlfriend?” She ignored the open door, a clear sign that she was unwelcome at the moment.
“Yes. And I was really excited to tell you, but you guys find it so hilarious that I could have a relationship.” Lena said, hurt that her friends were so disbelieving of her.
“No, it’s just … you’ve told us so many times that you don’t date. You are … were … so adamant over it.”
“And when you stopped mentioning your one-night stands and stuff, we figured you were going through a dry spell or something,” Ewa added.
“We’re sorry for not believing you,” they both hung their heads, embarrassed that they hurt a close friend. Lena closed the door gently and returned to the living room.
“Does this mean I can finally meet her?” Jule asked after a moment of awkward silence.
“You know who she is? That’s not fair; how come Jule gets to know first?” Ewa moaned.
“Not yet, Jule. I still need to tell the rest of the girls first,” Lena sighed, sitting down on the armchair by the window. “And Jule knows first because she figured it out.” She explained to Eva.
“You should have seen her after the Barca match. She was so giddy, all blushy, and staring at her phone. Ugh, it was so cute. And then, after the home leg, she came into the changing room and couldn’t stop smiling. I’m surprised you haven’t caught on sooner; she’s not very subtle.” Jule gushed.
“So, it’s a Barca player? Who is it?” Sveindis asked.
“No, wait, let me guess,” Ewa shouted. “Ba-Batlle? Is that how you say it?” Lena giggled as Ewa bounced excitedly on the sofa.
“No, she has that maybe-thing with Bronze. Coll?” Sveindis countered.
“No, she’s definitely in a relationship; they did a lock screen video thing, and she was her girlfriend” Ewa and Sveindis pushed their heads together, coming up with ideas of who might have stolen their best friend's heart.
“What about Y/S/N? Y/N? Is that her name?” They looked to Lena for an answer. Whilst a verbal one wasn’t given, it wasn’t needed. The beaming smile was all that was required.
“Awww, she’s a cutie.” Ewa came over to hug Lena
“Real sweet, too. She came to check on Camilla when Pina did that tackle.” Sviendis agreed. “Now, tell us all about it. I want all the details!” They all got themselves comfy as Lena spilt all the information about the best few months of her life.
L💚: I told some of them
[Initial]💙❤️: Omg really??
[Initial]💙❤️: What did they say?????
L💚: They didn’t believe me at first ahahahaha
L💚: They thought u may have been Ona or Cata !!!!
[Initial]💙❤️: ahahahahahahhahahhahahahhahahaha
L💚: But then they said ur a cutie and real sweet
L💚: Which u r, obviously xxx
[Initial]💙❤️: Stoppppppp
[Initial]💙❤️: Ur gonna make me cry xx
[Initial]💙❤️: R u gonna tell the rest ?????
[Initial]💙❤️: No rush or anything xxx
L💚: Yeh I am xxx
L💚: I wanna tell the world ur mine xx
[Initial]💙❤️: now I’m actually crying wtf
[Initial]💙❤️: 1 photo image attached
[Initial]💙❤️: I wanna tell the world ur mine xxxxx
L💚: Schatzzzzzzz xxxx
[Initial]💙❤️: A nickname now?
L💚: Shut uppppp
[Initial]💙❤️: never
[Initial]💙❤️: Meine Liebeeeeeeee
L💚: 🩷🩷🩷🩷
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“Obi,” Alex called as the training ended for the day. “I need to talk to you.” Fuck! Lena tried to remember what she might have done to piss Alex off. She had behaved all training session – for the most part; the thing with the water was Riola’s fault, not hers. She was guided into an empty media room and was met with Svenja sitting on the table. Fuckkkkk! What had she done? Two players she saw as maternal figures had their Angry Faces on.
“Before you say anything. It wasn’t me,” Lena rushed to cover her back.
“What wasn’t you?” Svenja asked.
“Whatever you think I’ve done,” Lena answered cryptically. She wasn’t admitting to anything.
“So, you don’t have a girlfriend then?” Alex asked. “Sveindis was lying to Vivi?”
“Um … my answer depends on how mad you will be.” Lena ducked her head to avoid Alex’s gaze.
“We’re not mad that you have a girlfriend, Lena.” Svenja pushed herself from the table and took Lena’s hand.
“We’re mildly irritated we found out from changing room gossip,” Alex added, coming over to squeeze Lena’s shoulders. “Look at me,” she instructed when Lena still refused to look her in the eye.
“Your girlfriend is Y/F/N Y/S/N, yes? Barca’s number 17.”
“Yeh,” Lena couldn’t help the small smile that spread across her face at the mention of you.
“Does she treat you well, Obi?” Svenja asked.
“Yes, she treats me very well.”
“And you treat her well?” Alex added.
“I like to think so. She said I make her happy.”
“Good. When will she next be in Wolfsburg? Or at a match?” Svenja asked
“I’m going to see her at her away game in Madrid when we have the free weekend, but our schedules don’t line up for a while after that. They match up again just after the international break, so she’s coming here.” Lena explained.
“Good, gives us longer to prepare a speech.” Alex said to Svenja
“Speech?” Lena asked, slightly weary of what might happen – she knew that the 2 women could be very intimidating, especially if you weren’t German or didn’t know them very well.
“Yes, a speech—the ‘do not mess with Obi’ speech. I don’t doubt you will get one from Putellas and maybe Bronze and Paños, too. They seem very protective of her.” Svenja pulled Lena into a hug as Alex ruffled her hair.
L💚: Whose speech will be worse? Alexia’s or Alex and Svenja’s?
[Initial]💙❤️: Hmm, scary Germans or scary Spaniards???
L💚: I will endure it
L💚: Just for u Schatz
[Initial]💙❤️: As will I
[Initial]💙❤️: Only 4 u meine Leibe
I hope you enjoyed this little sub-chapter thing. I'm on my uni holidays atm so hopefully I can write the next chapter fairly soon but I do have deadlines etc <3
Also thank you to all the love from the anons ahaha - it means a lot to me <3<3<3<3<3<3
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theoriginalkaminari · 4 months
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Attention span of a squirrel
Shoto Todoroki with an S/O who is very silly
Also seriously pls do not repost or reblog
Warnings: swearing sorta? Uh reader is GN and stuff.
Also the reason I call this 'Attention span of a squirrel' is bc squirrels have the attention span of uhhhhhh
Shoto was hanging from a rope, ankle first and upside down. The rope made him spin around the room very slowly as he felt the blood go to his head.
To make things worse, Shoto was dangling over a pit. It was foggy down there, so he wasn't able to see the bottom.
You both were chosen to go against Aizawa for this project, to see how well you did in a real villain situation.
So far?
Not so great.
Shoto was beginning to feel lightheaded, so he called out to you to try and bring your attention back to the situation.
"L/N." He calls, making you jolt out of your distracted state and back at him. "Hm?" You look up at him. "Oh yeah. Sorry, I forgot." You laugh nervously, scratching the back of your neck.
"Okay...so..." You tap your chin in thought as you stare at the rope wrapped around Shoto's ankle. "If I were me...which I am...then how would I get Shoto out of here?" You jut out your bottom lip slightly, narrowing your eyes as if it would make you think harder.
"I don't mean to rush you," Shoto begins in his usual monotone voice. "But Mr. Aizawa could be approaching." He says, spinning slowly as the rope clings to his ankle.
You don't seem to hear this, as you're staring down at the pit. "Aha! I've got the situation!" You grin confidently, stumbling slightly as you take off your right shoe. Shoto raises an eyebrow, confused to what you were doing.
Then you suddenly throw your shoe into the pit. "One..." And you begin counting. "Two...three....four.....five..." You continue. Shoto feels confused as he stares at you. What the hell were you doing?
"L/N. What are you doing?" He finally asks, eyes still trained on your every move.
After you count to ten, you beam proudly, like you made a shocking discovery. At least, you thought you did.
"Well my icy friend," You begin as you point down into the pit. "We have discovered a bottomless pi-" You were interrupted by a soft 'thud' of your shoe finally hitting the bottom of the pit.
"Oh. Nevermind. Not bottomless, just ten seconds deep."
"What does that have to do with anything?" Shoto asks, tilting his head as best he can. You just turn back and grin at him.
"Well, if I cut you down from there, at least I know how long you'll be falling for!" You beam, like you've solved all world problems.
"Okay, now hold still." You try to reach for the rope, but stumble and almost fall into the pit. "Whoa!" You yelp lightly as the dirt crumbles beneath your feet. Luckily you got out of the way in time.
"Okay! New plan." You clap your hands together. Then, to Shoto's dismay, you begin to pace around the pit. After a while, you grin. Its not an innocent grin, but a mischievous one. Almost Bakugo like.
You suddenly run backwards. Shoto sighs in disappointment, thinking you've given up on him. "How do I-" He stops himself when he looks back at you, now charging at him. "L/N! What are you-"
You grin as you jump off the ledge of the pit, jumping up to grab him. You use a pocket knife to cut the rope in the process so you both don't get stuck.
You and Shoto tumble onto the otherside, landing into a pile of eachother.
Sort of a 69 position.
Quickly, you both pull away and stand up.
Shoto feels embarrassed, looking away from you and not knowing what to say.
That is, until you clear your throat. "So...here." You hand him a small amethyst rock. Maybe you collected it a while ago, or you found it somewhere. Eitherway, you don't really remember.
Shoto tilts his head, looking at the amethyst in your palm, then back at your face. "Whats this?" He asks.
You smile softly, finding his confusion amusing. "A gift! See? Its pretty, like you." You beam. Shoto swears he sees light emitting from you as you smile at him. Shoto gives a small smile in return, and takes the amethyst. "Thank you, L/N." He says, his voice soft.
You laugh softly and place your hands on your hips. "And since I gave you a gift, we're friends now. Is that okay?" You say, even though Shoto doesn't have a choice in the matter.
Shoto puts the amethyst in his pocket. "Okay."
You grin and give him a small thumbs up. "Great! So you have to call me by my first name now, okay?"
"Okay."
"Okay what?"
"Okay, Y/N."
"Atta boy!"
Shoto smiles softly. He feels a sudden feeling in his chest, snapping him out of his thoughts. He places a hand on his chest, suddenly very confused.
Did my heart skip a beat? Do I have heart problems? Perhaps I should see Recovery Girl after this.... He thought.
Eventually, the day ended, and everyone was heading to their dorm rooms to finally get some sleep.
All except Shoto. He stayed on the green couch in the lounge, staring blankly at the wall, lost in thought.
"We're friends now, so you have to call me by my first name!" Your voice rang in his head like a lullaby.
A week passed, and you and Shoto stared hanging out more. You would say things like:
"Shoto! Do you ever thinks ants get lonely?"
"Shoto! Did you know worms have an asshole?"
"Shoto! Whats your least favorite animal?"
Things that would make him smile, or things that would make him confused. Things that would make him think, or things that would make him surprised.
Every little thing you did made him have a soft and warm feeling in his chest. Shoto, completely oblivious to these feelings, decides to confront his friend, Izuku. One night, everyone is staring to head to bed, when Shoto approaches Izuku.
"Midoriya." He says, staring the conversation. "I need your help."
Izuku tilts his head, looking up at his friend. His green eyes fill with curiosity. "What is it, Todoroki? Is everything okay?" He wonders.
"I think I have heart problems." Shoto says, in earshot for Mina and Ochako to hear.
"WHAT?!" Mina gasps, suddenly very interested to Shoto's conversation with Izuku. Mina and Ochako rush over to them, their eyes filled with concern. "Are you okay, Todoroki? Should we get you to the hospital?" Midoriya asks, standing up as his expression turns to one of concern.
Shoto thinks for a moment, before speaking again. "No. I just feel a warm feeling in my chest, and sometimes my heart skips a beat. Sometimes my face gets hot, even though I try and cool myself down with my left side."
Mina and Ochako's eyes widen. The two beam, leaning ever so closely to Shoto. "Do you feel this way around a certain someone?" Mina says, her voice giddy and excited.
Shoto nods. "Yes, it happens around L/- I mean, Y/N."
Mina and Ochako squeal, while Izuku sighs in relief, glad his friend isn't suffering from any heart failure.
"What? What is it?" Shoto looks at them all, very confused. Did he really have heart problems...?
"Its love!" Mina grabs Ochako's hands, the two of them bouncing around in circles.
"Love..?" Shoto tilts his head. "Yes, Y/N is my friend. I care for them deeply." He nods, confused to why Mina and Ochako were makeing a big deal about this fact.
"No, Todoroki!" Mina looks at him in the eyes as she stops bouncing. "Romantic love." She corrects.
Something in Shoto's brain clicks. "Oh." He says quietly, a soft dusty pink tainting his cheeks.
Shoto began to hang out with you more, staying by your side as you ramble about silly things, or smiling as you show him silly things.
Until one day, Izuku encouraged him to confess.
Shoto asked you to meet him at the courtyard after school, and you did. Shoto took a deep breath, trying to gather his nerves before he spoke to you.
"Y/N." He says softly as he looks into your eyes.
Your beautiful eyes...the ones he could get lost in for hours. The ones he loved staring into.
"I have feelings for you. Romantic ones." He finally says after a moment of silence.
You, being the person you were, holds up a hand for him to high-five. "Dude, no way, that is awesome sauce!" You say.
Shoto looks at you in confusion and disbelief. You suddenly cover your mouth in embarrassment, muttering quiet apologizes.
"Oh god, I'm really sorry, Shoto! It just popped into my head and then my mouth talked and then it all fell apart but what I ment to say was..." You take a deep breath, and look at him in the eyes.
"I love you. Like a lot." You hold out your arms as far as they could go. "If I was able to, I would stretch my arms pur way further but this is as far as they can go. But I really do love you!" You beam.
Shoto chuckles softly at your antics. He suddenly feels...complete.
You smile as well, and lower your hands. Then, you slowly extend your hand out to him to take. Shoto's eyes light up slightly. He slowly take your hand, and you intertwine your fingers with his.
"Now I get to tell people I have my own furnace AND my own cooler!" You grin brightly, making Shoto chuckle again.
He kisses your cheek gently. "Your pretty." He whispers.
And so doofus and doofus 2.0 relationship begins.
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mikobeautifulheart · 7 months
Text
Yuji accidently switches to Sukuna when your asleep.
TW: Uhhhhhh. well it goes kind of spicy but nothing really happens (Smut wise) just a li'll spicy
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"Yuji, your squishing me" you mumbled half asleep. You woke up to the feeling of Yuji's arms wrapped a little to tight around your torso.
"Shh, you'll wake the brat up." a deep voice said in you ear.
Immediately your fight or flight instincts kicked in and you were trying to pull your self out of his hold.
"Relax, i'm not going to kill you. Yet" He said holding on tighter. (If it were possible)
"What do you want!" you whispered harshly, your voice still waking up.
"Just to get taste of what the brat dose, isn't that fair?" he hummed as one of the arms let go and the hand moves lower down your body.
"No-" You gasped feeling his cold hand rest on your upper thigh and give it a small but harsh squish.
"Honestly, don't bore me or I will kill you. What a plesant surprise that will be for the brat when he wakes up."
His hand goes higher this time, playing with the hem of Yujis shirt you were wearing.
"Don't touch m-" you cut off by sukunas other hand over your mouth.
"Shhhh. Wouldn't want anyone else to know about this would you? You might get the best executed beofre he even eats all 20 fingers of they find out he can't keep control of me."
Yuji being executed was something you never wanted to happen, that's why you cherished every moment with him. But God Sukuna was making it really hard right now.
His hand let go of the shirt and slowly made its way under it making your eyes widen in horror.
"Mhmnmph" the muffled pleas you were saying didn't reach sukunas ears as he kept moving up onto your stomach.
You started to struggle more as the adrenaline really kicked in moving your head forward and slaming it into Yijis/Sukunas nose.
"Ouchh, what was that for." Yuji said as if he just woke up.
You wriggled making Yuji realise the positions his hands were in before letting go in an instant.
"What happened?!" Yuji asked seeing tears pricked the corner of your eyes.
"I though he was going to-" Yujj reached his hand out to wipe an escaped tear before a tounge came out of his palm and licked it way.
You and Yuji froze as he just looked at you mortified.
"I'm just going to move to the floor..." Yuji said taking his pillow and setting up on the ground.
"No yuji it's alright it wasn't you" You wanted to be comforted by him so bad but just knowing sukuna was there almost put you off.
"Are you sure? More like are you alright?" He asked. You shook your head as a no and leaned into him for a hug before a mouth appeared on his cheek whispering to you
"I'll be back"
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AUTHORS NOTE: IDK why I'm so tempted to write smut but not smut rn. Btw rebloggs r welcomed. Anywaysss part 2?
OKAY I NEED TO KNOW:
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themultifanshipper · 3 months
Note
hello it's me again! requesting for the 2nd time for a Sebastian Vettel fic (I'm horrendously down bad for this man🙇‍♀️) could you please do Rb!Seb x Button!reader because I'm a sucker for brother's best friend trope. Jenson invites Seb over after a night out of partying and he stays there for a couple of days. Seb has a couple of small interactions with reader mostly Jenson stepping in which it doesn't lead into something more lol. so here's the juicy part reader accidentally walks in on Seb taking a bath and like she's so embarrassed she decides to( lock herself in her room even Jenson was concerned. Seb decides to talk to reader alone in her room and it leads to them passionately making out so they have their little "we shouldn't be doing this" "your brother doesn't have to know" moment LOL and they uh do it ig.
this is awkward to even ask for I feel like squidward begging for change in that one ep 😭 like I feel so GUILTY LMAO but anyways please don't rush yourself into writing this please do it in your own pace I really don't mind waiting 🫶 I also would like to say how much I adore your writing and the effort you put into your work so I understand if it takes a while to write all of this down. Don't forget to take yourself as well while you're writing 🩷🩷 -🐇
You had seen Seb in a number of embarrassing situations and positions, him being your brother’s best friend ever since he joined F1, but this was definitely the first time you had seen him quite this naked.
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Warnings: Uhhhhhh… I don’t know what came over me I’ll be honest, Seb is super dominant in this one guys, like… overstimulation, praise kink, degrading a bit? Slapping? I need to be waterboarded in holy water at this point, I fear… the dialogue is cringe enough to make me question my worth as a person (this was written at 3 am)also I think I overused the word princess but oh well
Jenson and Seb were partying for a few days to wind down during winter break after an intense season, and you partied with them. You were much younger than your brother, he was in his early 30s and you only 21, so you were technically closer to Seb’s age, which led to a friendship blossoming between the two of you. You’d been on numerous trips and holidays with the pair of them, and you’d been to a fair few races to cheer them on.
Of course with the proximity and the similar ages, Jenson was terrified that Seb would try something with you, and he threatened him several times over the course of their friendship. Him being so much older than you meant he was extremely protective, sometimes bordering on overbearing. And you noticed that as you got older, Jenson rarely left you and Seb alone in the same room for more than 5 minutes without checking in on whether you “needed a drink” or “have you seen my charger? I swear I left it near your stuff could you please look for me thanks” …
This particular weekend had been quite intense, the three of you going out several nights in a row, and you finally managed to get some alone time in the peace and quiet of your brother’s house while the boys went to pick up some pizza for dinner before you all went out again afterward.
Which is why you were so shocked when you opened the bathroom door to pee and got an eyeful of Seb in the bath, very naked, and with the way his hand flew out of the water (splashing half the room in the process) you were pretty sure he had just been caught touching himself. You had caught him. Touching himself.  In the bath.  Naked.  In the bath naked, touching himself.  In your bathroom.  You had caught him touching himself in your bathroom, in the bath.  Naked.
It took you a few seconds to absorb the situation before you shouted “Oh my god! I am so sorry!” and covered your eyes (about 30 seconds too late but it’s the thought that counts!) before backing out and shutting the door, ignoring Seb’s yells about it being his fault for not locking the door.
You hightailed it straight to your bedroom and slammed the door, locked it, and slid to the floor, with your head in your hands.
Seb’s dick.
That’s the only thought your mind could conjure up for the next several minutes. You didn’t even get a great look at it, being more entranced by the blush quickly spreading down Seb’s neck and toned chest at your intrusion, and it was distorted by the rippling water, but it was there. It existed. And now it refused to leave your mind for even a second.
That’s when you heard the tell-tale noise of the front door closing and Jenson coming back from his pizza run. He called out for you, but the lack of an answer made him come looking for you.
He knocked on your door and tried opening it but failed, immediately making him worry.
“You alright in there, love? I’ve got the pizzas” he spoke softly through the door.
You huffed, you really didn’t want to face Seb after that, so you played the illness card.
“I really don’t feel well Jense, I’m going to sit this one out!” you called out.
He frowned, you seemed fine 20 minutes ago when he left. “You sure? I got you your favourite!” “I’m sorry! You can have it, and you two go have fun tonight! I need to sleep last night off, and I’ll go out with you guys tomorrow!”
He wasn’t convinced but there was no point in arguing with you, so he eventually agreed and left you alone. He and Seb went out an hour later and you were left to your own devices, so you got into your pyjamas (which consisted of a large t-shirt and not much else), made yourself some food and slinked back to your room as thoughts of Seb kept plaguing your mind.
It’s not like you’d never realised Seb was attractive, of course you’d noticed, look at the man for god’s sake. But seeing him all flushed and naked and wet had awoken something in you. Something very dangerous, given the nature of your relationship.
Your thoughts soon drifted to rather lewd areas, as you pictured Seb in multiple situations. Running his hands up and down your naked body in the shower. Sinking to his knees at your feet as he devoured you. Fucking you into the mattress with a hand over your mouth to not alert your brother with your moans. Fucking you in his driver’s room next time you went to a race. Making you come over and over while whispering dirty things in your ear.
Your fantasies were interrupted by the sound of the front door again. You glanced at the clock, it read 3:26.  It seems time flies when you’re thirsting over your brother’s best friend, but it was still oddly early for them to be coming home.
You heard footsteps shuffling along the corridor and they stopped right in front of your door, the owner of the feet seemingly listening for any noise coming from your room.
“Jense?” you called out.
“No” Seb’s voice answered, “It’s me, can I come in?”
“Yeah” you sighed, you couldn’t avoid him forever.
He poked his head in, smiling softly at you before padding over to the bed as you sat on the edge next to him, consciously crossing your legs to avoid another incident, given your lack of underwear.
“Couldn’t sleep?” he asked.
“Not really, although I’ll admit I didn’t see the time pass at all… What about you guys? This is rather early for you two, isn’t it?”
He chuckled and looked deep into your eyes. “I’m here on my own, actually”.
For some reason that made a shiver go down your spine. “Jenson found a companion to go home with, and I didn’t feel like partying alone.”
“Aaah” you sighed comically “slagclaren strikes again”
He laughed softly. “Yeah…”
You looked at each other for a while before the tension became unbearable and you looked away, blushing.
“So about earlier-” he started but you stood up suddenly and interrupted him.
“Please Seb, I really don’t want to talk about it, it was super embarrassing, and I don’t want to make things uncomfortable for you, I’m so sorry”
He cocked his head to the side, frowning at you. “Why would I be uncomfortable? It was an accident, and I’m not exactly embarrassed by my body so… no harm done” he smiled sweetly when your gaze snapped to him.
You laughed in disbelief “Well I should hope you’re not embarrassed by your body! It’s so -”
The image of his wet, muscular body flashed through your mind, along with all the other images you’d conjured up since “uhhhmm…” your brain took a second to reboot.
He smirked “Go on, what is it?”
You blushed profusely and stuttered “Uh, well, it’s uhmm… It’s good”  and then you went and gave him a fucking thumbs up.
Jesus, you couldn’t be more lame if you tried.
He raised his eyebrows and smirked even wider “It’s good??”
 “You know what I mean!” you whined defensively, face becoming redder by the second “You’re a high-performance athlete! You’re all muscly and… and hot, you know? Like my brother!”
What. The. Fuck.
Your eyes widened in shock “I’m sorry I don’t know why I said that! I panicked! I don’t think my brother’s hot! I mean objectively he is, I guess! But I just-”
Seb was laughing, and he stood up to pull you into a hug.
“Hey, it’s okay I was just teasing you.” he whispered into your ear. “The look on your face when you opened the door and saw me in the bath told me everything I needed to know about what you think of my body…”
Your breath hitched. “Wh- what?”
“You couldn’t take your eyes off of me” he leaned back to look at you “And I think you know what I was doing when you came in…”
He spoke so softly you could barely hear him through the pounding of your heart, and he slowly leaned in and whispered, “Do you know what I was thinking about while I touched myself in your bathroom?”
You whimpered and closed your eyes, the smell of his cologne was overwhelming your senses, and you were on the brink of doing something incredibly stupid. You shook your head. “No, I don’t…”
He chuckled “No?” his hands slid down to wrap around your waist “Let me show you then”
The feeling of his lips on yours didn’t exactly come as a shock, but it was electrifying, and you deepened the kiss immediately, despite the alarm bells ringing in your mind. Your hands went up to grip his hair and he groaned, his hips bucking into yours as he slotted a thigh between your legs for you to grind on.
His hands slid further down and gripped your ass and you gasped, throwing your head back, and he took the opportunity to start kissing down your neck.
"We shouldn't be doing this" you panted, but it sounded weak and shaky even to you.
"Your brother doesn't have to know" he responded, lowering himself down to the ground. He patted the bed and winked at you. “Sit on the edge for me, princess”
You hesitated, and he suddenly looked worried. “I don’t want to force you into anything. If you want, we can just forget everything and go back to being friends”
The thought of that made your heart sink into your stomach.
“It’s just… my brother’s going to kill us if he finds out” you chewed on your bottom lip.
“I won’t tell him if you don’t” he flashed his signature grin, and when yougave him a shy smile in return, he tapped the bed again.
“Now are you going to sit down like a good girl or do I have to make you sit?”
You were almost a blur with how fast you moved.
Once you were settled, Seb spread your legs and glanced down, finally noticing that you were bare before him. He gasped and lightly bit your knee to stop himself from jumping on you immediately.
“Baby, you’re going to be the death of me” he said, nosing up your thigh and you giggled at his reaction, and the feel of his stubble on your sensitive skin.
“Naughty girl, not wearing any panties with your brother’s best friend in your room. One could think you had an ulterior motive…”
He hiked up your legs over his shoulders and pulled your hips almost over the edge, forcing you to lay down and cling to the bed as he licked a stripe up your already wet pussy. He savoured the taste for a second, muttering a curse in German, before diving in completely, lips and tongue working in tandem to drive you crazy.
When his fingers joined the party, it took you no time at all to fall over the precipice, lips chanting his name as your fingers gripped the sheets for dear life.
But he didn’t stop there, he was like a man starved and you writhed in pleasure as he just kept going and you got close to edge again in record time.
“Are you going to be a good girl for me and give me another one?” He mumbled into your pussy as his fingers continued their assault. But you were so close you couldn’t speak, which displeased him greatly, so he pulled away, your orgasm slowly fading as you whined.
“Words, princess, I need words”
But you were incapable of words, so he slapped you. Right on your abused cunt as you cried out. The shock of it turned you on so much you couldn’t think straight.
He waited, but your lack of response warranted another slap, this time slightly higher up on your clit and you squeaked.
“I’ll ask again. Are you going to be a good girl for me and come on my fingers when I say so?”
He’d barely finished his sentence before you wailed “Yes Seb! Anything for you, fuck- please!”
He chuckled “So desperate for it” he slid three fingers in easily and started a brutal pace “Fuck, you’re so much wetter, you like me abusing your pretty pussy, hmm? Making it all puffy and red when you disobey me?”
“Yes Seb, fuck I’m so close!”
“Good girl, go on then, come for me princess”
And you did, so hard that you almost blacked out.
You’d barely recovered before you found yourself being dragged up the bed, legs hooked around his waist, his arms wrapped around you tight as he pounded into you desperately, panting and groaning into your neck.
“You feel so good, so tight around me, fuck- I’ve wanted to do this for so long, schatz…”
You gasped and he deepened his thrusts, hitting all the perfect spots inside you.
“I never want to leave this pussy, so fucking good for me, taking me so well, princess” he reached up, grabbed a pillow and placed it under your hips to raise them up a bit. Then he grabbed your waist for leverage to deepen the angle of his thrusts even more, making you see stars.
“I’m so close, Seb… fuck, can I come please?” you gasped, and his hand moved to rub tight circles around your puffy, sensitive clit.
“Come for me baby, such a good girl, all over my cock, that’s it…” he cooed as your body arched off the bed and your nails dug into his shoulders as you came around him.
Your pussy was like a vice around his cock and his hips stuttered, he was so close.
He came after only a few more thrusts, groaning out broken sentences as his hips slammed into yours, eyes locked on to where his cock disappeared inside you.
“Going to fucking fill you up, princess… Deep inside this cunt… all mine… Squeezing so perfect around me… fucking take it, take it all, … fuck- ”
He collapsed on top of you, breathing hard as he came down from his high, face buried in your neck.
The next few minutes should have been awkward. You had just fucked your brother’s best friend. He had just come inside his best friend’s little sister.  But, weirdly, it all felt stupidly natural.
“You want to take a shower with me?” You asked, standing up on shaky legs as you felt his come drip down your inner thighs “Or would you prefer a bath?” You smirked at him and waddled into the bathroom.
“Shower please, I don’t like baths.” he replied.
You hummed as it took you a few seconds for your brain to catch up with that statement.
But then it hit you like a bucket of freezing water.
“ You. What?!!”
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ggukiepie · 11 months
Text
one of your girls (pt. 2) (jungkook x reader)
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we go 'round again, we jump back in bed that's what you do when you love somebody these bad omens, i look right through them that's what you do when you love somebody bad omens by 5sos
pairing: jungkook x fem oc
tags: smut, angst, fluff, fuckboy!jk, fwb rel, oc is...she thinks with her heart <//3, college au, jungkook is sus and a bit mean but is oc any better ? hmmmm
warnings: kissing, fingering, protected sex, mirror kink, backshots wooo but make it romantic, light choking, multiple orgasms, a little bit of aftercare, cuddling :o
word count: 6k
a/n: weeeee part 2 is finally here !! sorry this took so long yall. i have two more parts to release for this series (flashback then part 3). anw happy reading !! uhhhhhh the ending..dont scream at me :D / part 1 / drabble i (flashback)
taglist: @yuwaimo @haileycannotcometothephonern @hoseokteardrop @hoodrejects @agrika @joonwater @moonchild1
..••°°°°••..°°••....••°°..••°°°°••..
It's sunny today which calls for hanging out at the quad. It's what you and your friends usually do to take advantage of the rare warm days. Jihyo's busy bickering with Mingyu, you don't know what they're really talking about because you're busy re-writing your notes. You haven't seen Jimin yet but he texted the group chat saying he's just buying food. And Jungkook...well you don't know if he's going to show up today. You haven't talked to him since that night. It's just been three days anyway.
You feel someone sit down beside you and you notice it's Jimin. He's wearing those skinny jeans he loves so much because he says it makes his ass look nice. You roll your eyes every time he mentions that.
"Cool guy alert," Mingyu suddenly calls out. You whip your head up to stare at Jimin who's wearing the biggest pair of sunglasses you've ever seen, it's covering half of his face already.
"Too sunny for you, Jiminie?" Jihyo teases this time.
You all watch Jimin silently as he removes the sunglasses. His left eye is bruised and it's ugly and purple and almost black.
"What the fuck," Jihyo says to break the silence. "What happened to you?"
Jimin doesn't say anything yet, just simply fixes his hair and shakes his head. You can tell he's trying not to get angry because his jaw is clenched.
"Jimin?" you whisper.
"It was Jungkook," he says gruffly. Your heart stops again at the mention of his name. Why would Jimin and Jungkook fight? Their friendship is pretty solid and they always get along well. You've never seen them annoyed at each other.
Your eyes flit to Mingyu and you think he knows what happened because he's silent, no hint of surprise on his face. He's looking down at the table while playing with his food.
"You guys never fight," Jihyo interjects. "What happened?"
Jimin turns to face you and you suddenly think you know why. You don't want to say it yourself but you think you've got an inkling why Jungkook punched him. You just hope you're wrong.
"You need to talk to him," Jimin tells you, completely ignoring Jihyo's question. You nod silently and check your phone to see if Jungkook has texted you at all. Of course he hasn't. Typical. But you'll find him today. You don't know exactly what went down but Jimin telling you to find him confirms your suspicions. It's enough to get you mad, your body heating and tensing up in simmering anger. You don't mind what Jungkook does to you, how he hurts your feelings without intending to, how he treats you like you're some disposable object, like you're just there always on the sidelines waiting for him. What you can't tolerate is Jungkook bringing both your friends into your situationship. What goes on between you and Jungkook should stay between you both and that's it. You can't handle him hurting Jimin as well.
There are a few places where you think Jungkook might be. You walk to the cafeteria first and search for him in the crowd. He's not there so you head to the library instead and your heart drops the moment you see him talking to some girl.
"Hey," you practically shout, suprising the people in the library and yourself as well, even. You're usually never this angry. Never address someone in such a venomous way. But you can't help but feel irked at what Jungkook's done.
He looks back and his eyes widen at your angry form. It only lasts for a second before he smirks and walks closer to you.
"Yeah?" he says, all smug and cocky.
"We need to talk."
Then you turn around and start walking out of the library, could hear Jungkook walking behind you already. Girl he was talking to all forgotten.
Surprisingly, you end up at his place.
You walk into his living room, ignoring him when he tells you to take a seat on the couch.
"Did you punch Jimin?" you ask right away, wanting to get this stupid issue over with.
You watch as his jaw clenches, tongue poking the inside of his cheek. He looks at you for a moment, eyes in slits at your hostility. "And what if I did?"
"What the fuck was that, Jungkook?" You look at him with stern eyes and could tell he's angry as well, chest rising up and down in quick breaths.
"Don't mess with my friends," he says.
"Jimin is my friend too!" you retort. "What happens between me and Jimin has nothing to do with you."
"Just—"
"Just what, Jungkook?" you cut him off. "You had no right to punch Jimin like that. Why'd you even do it in the first place?" You place your hands on your hips as you wait for him to answer you, puffing out a breath in frustration.
He looks a bit lost, eyes darting from side to side to look for an answer. The longer the silence goes, the shorter your patience gets.
"Well?" you prompt.
"Just don't, alright?" he says lamely. You roll your eyes. "You can sleep with anyone else except—"
"Who the fuck gave you the right to tell me who I can and can't sleep with?" You're almost screaming now but you don't care. This push and pull with Jungkook is making you so angry you want to punch him. You walk up to him and shove at his chest but he barely stumbles back. It just angers you even further. "I don't even give you shit when you sleep with other girls!" You continue pushing him back, practically punching his chest now. "It's not like you agreed to be exclusive. You said it yourself that you still wanted to fuck around. That was the agreement."
Jungkook grabs your wrists to stop you from pushing him. You watch him clench his jaw as he makes eye contact with you. "What if I want to take back what I said?"
"What?" you mumble dumbly, all the fight leaving your body.
He lets go of your wrists and takes a step back. You watch him pace back and forth in his room. "What if I want us to be exclusive?"
You say the first thing that comes to mind. "You're lying." He must be. He's just trying to lure you in, get him on your good side again.
He looks at you dead in the eyes and it seems like all the anger and frustration is leaving his body as well. He looks defeated and tired, and you're sure you look the same. "I'm not. I never lie to you."
"You do, Kook," you say quietly. But you're not saying it to make him feel bad. You're simply saying it because it's the truth and both of you know that.
He sits down beside you on his bed and buries his face in his hands. You watch him and try to keep your tears at bay.
"Kook, if this is some sick joke—"
"It's not," he says all of a sudden. "What if I want us to be exclusive?" he tries again.
You don't like it when he looks at you like that. Like you matter to him. Like he actually cares. Like he feels the same way as you. Looking into his eyes is too much so you turn your head away and stare at the wall instead.
"Why?" you whisper.
"Because..." he tries. "Because—"
"Because what, Kook? Suddenly you don't like the idea of me sleeping with other guys? But you can sleep with other girls? And if I say yes to you, what'll happen then?" you say harshly. "Huh? You're gonna forget about me? Just use me whenever you want?"
"It's not like that, sweetheart." He tries grabbing your hand but you shake him off. You stand up and walk to the other side of the room, suddenly wanting to be away from him. Being near Jungkook clouds your senses and makes you act irrationally.
"Don't call me that." You feel your lips trembling and you're pretty sure tears are streaming down your face. "I don't know what you want from me, Jungkook. You can't even explain why you want us to be exclusive."
He mirrors your expression, big doe eyes suddenly teary as well. "I'm sorry," he chokes out. It stays silent after that. You nod to yourself. Maybe this is the best explanation you'll get. You gather your things and mumble a goodbye. You exit his bedroom and Jungkook doesn't chase after you. At this point you don't expect him to anymore. You bump into Mingyu and Jihyo upon exiting Jungkook's apartment. They call out to you but you ignore them and speed walk out of the building.
Your heart hurts. Like, it physically hurts. You know you should feel happy with what Jungkook's just told you. It's what you wanted ever since you fell for him. But why are you pushing away? Why don't you want to believe him all of a sudden?
Because you used to. Believe him, that is. Used to look at him all starry eyed with whatever he said. Said yes to whatever he asked. Looked at him like he can achieve world peace. Something stupid of the sort. Wore your heart on your sleeve every time you were with him. Even when you weren't, now that you think about it.
You always showed your feelings through your actions. He just showed his feelings through his words.
It's different but it's the same. This time you don't believe him. Stopped believing his words some time ago. Always knew there was some lie beneath his words. Always doubted what he said. Or just brushed it over your shoulder. Never let it settle in the crevices of your heart, which is sadly just filled with him. Him, him, him.
Jungkook, Jungkook, Jungkook.
You should feel sorry for yourself for how much he's changed you without even trying to directly. You never thought you'd have to change yourself for a man. But here he is, making you doubt him and the world. You were never like this before.
You thought love was easy. That if it was the right person, everything would fall into place naturally. You didn't know love would be like this. That you'd always be cautious, always had your walls up, looking over your shoulder. That you had to fight for love, or that it hurt so much you found difficulty in breathing.
But is Jungkook the right person?
It's not something you want to answer yourself, because you'll get hurt either way. You just brush the thought aside like you do with your feelings.
You don't go back to your apartment because you know Jihyo thinks it'll be the first place you go to. Will barge in your room because she has a spare key. Is confrontational and protective of you like that, she'll ask questions right away.
But you don't want to think of what just transpired. You want to forget. Move on. Not sure if that means moving on from Jungkook entirely (you doubt you ever will) but you just want to forget about today.
So you keep walking. No destination in mind, you just let your feet walk you to wherever. Away from campus. Walking through some random park. Eventually, you end up at a Korean BBQ. Don't realize the meaning this place holds till you're seated. It's Jungkook's favorite restaurant. He brought you here twice.
Now you're here alone. You start feeling pathetic. Who the fuck goes to a restaurant like this alone? You scan the area—you see couples, friends, families eating together. But you're alone which means you have to grill the meat alone. Serve yourself. Eat by yourself.
You order two bottles of soju. Might as well be drunk while looking pathetic.
You think you've made a good decision. The food is good and you're doing everything yourself so you have no time to think about other things. Or people. Person.
You flip the meat only to see that you've flipped it too early. It's not properly cooked yet. Jungkook always knew when to flip it at the right time.
You sigh. That was what, twenty minutes of him being out of your head? At least it's progress. Somewhat.
After a while you decide you can't inhale anymore food. You'll probably explode. But a happy tummy is a happy heart. Or whatever people say. You're drunk, can't think straight. You're drunk but not stupid, so you ask Jihyo if she can pick you up.
She simply replies otw and is outside the restaurant ten minutes later. She comes in full force—which is really just Mingyu and Jimin with her in the car. It's Mingyu's car, anyway, so you expected to see him. You don't know why Jimin's with them, but you don't mind. Seeing your group of friends eases the ache in your heart even more. Even though one person's missing.
You don't mind. Well, just a little.
You smile at them as you walk to the car while Jihyo runs out of it to give you a big hug. She doesn't say anything as she rubs your back soothingly and you don't cry on her shoulder like you normally would. You're too tired of crying. Being sad.
You don't say anything as the both of you get back in the car. They don't ask about what happened and for that you're grateful. You don't want to process it yet, anyway. Don't think there's much to process. You love Jungkook and he doesn't love you back. Simple.
Your friends fill in the quiet pretty well. Jimin goes off on some tangent. You don't really know the topic. But Jihyo's interjecting from time to time. Mingyu makes a joke and it has all of you laughing. Eventually you get to Jimin's place. It's the usual hangout spot. A one bedroom apartment with a nice balcony. Not too big but not too small either. Just right for the four of you.
Usually five.
You don't know what transpired after you left Jungkook's place. How Mingyu and Jihyo saw you running out with tears down your cheeks. You don't know and you don't ask. You all watch a movie together. All fall asleep in Jimin's living room. Will complain about your backs hurting the next morning but you don't care. It's nice to be around them.
You leave Jimin's place the morning after. You, Mingyu and Jihyo leave because Jimin shoos all of you out. Says he has an exam to study for. He'll probably complain about it during lunch. Tuesdays are reserved for lunch with each other. Out on the quad, if it's sunny enough. In the cafeteria otherwise. You're not sure if Jungkook will show up. You doubt he will.
Mingyu and Jihyo walk you home. You shower and get ready for class. You move as if you're on autopilot. Shower. Get dressed. Get the right textbooks. Lock your door. Walk to class.
You put yourself in this bubble, in this false sense of security that things are ok. You'll be okay. You've been through a lot and you're still here standing, breathing, living. This? This is nothing.
You just have to give yourself time. Have to push your feelings away. Out of sight, out of mind. Don't think it works like that when it's about your feelings. Whatever. Your heart will mend itself back to place.
But what makes a heart whole? It's people, mostly. It's your friends. Your family.
Jungkook.
Always gonna be Jungkook.
And you're back at square one.
..••°°°°••..°°••....••°°..••°°°°••..
jk (sent two weeks ago): can we talk?
jk (sent one week ago): hi
jk (sent one week ago): can we talk pls?
jk (sent five days ago): y/n?
jk (sent three days ago): im so sorry, y/n. i just want to talk. please.
..••°°°°••..°°••....••°°..••°°°°••..
It's been two weeks since the incident and your group hasn't been complete ever since. Either Mingyu and Jihyo are with Jungkook, or with you. Things are starting to change for the worse, and it's making you sad.
At least Jimin and Jungkook have made up already. You don't know the details exactly (because you didn't ask), but you've heard that they've started hanging out again.
You and Jungkook?
You haven't replied to any of his texts. You haven't seen him for two weeks. It's weird. It feels like there's something wrong, something off. Like there's a small pebble in your shoe. Like there's a nagging voice in your head telling you to go back home because you forgot to unplug your straightener.
Like you're missing a piece of you. This hole in your chest that leaves you feeling empty.
You miss Jungkook. And not just the sex. You also miss the friendship. The intimate moments.
You don't have the courage to ask about him, to text him back or look for him. Frankly, you're still hurt from what transpired and you think you might just break if he hurts you again.
It's even raining today. The cold and gloomy weather dampens your mood even more. You baked cookies to try to cheer you up. You used to love baking but haven't done so in a while, you're not really sure why. But you needed an extra pick me up today.
You're holding the tupperware of cookies close to your chest when you walk in the cafeteria, looking for your friends. You always bake extra for them—love the looks on their faces when Jihyo counts all the cookies first and divides it accordingly, when Mingyu gets more than what he should have, when they all fight over the last piece.
When Jungkook would ask if you had extra cookies back at your place.
You don't think that'll happen anymore.
You spot your friends by a table in the corner of the cafeteria, next to a large window where the rain hits it outside in a steady patter.
You see Mingyu who's taking to Jimin, Jihyo typing something on her laptop.
And there's the missing piece, beanie-clad head hung low, tattooed hand busy writing on his notebook.
You feel your heart lurch in your chest. You stop walking, not minding that you're blocking the way.
You take deep breaths to calm your nerves. You have to see each other at some point. And also, you don't want your friends to feel awkward anymore.
You continue walking again and because the universe wants to torture you even further, the only available seat left is right across Jungkook.
"Hi," you chirp, trying to sound as cheery as you can as you sit down. Mingyu, Jihyo and Jimin all look at you in surprise, then Jimin starts talking about his day to fill in the awkward silence. The three of them try to make things go back to normal. You would've laughed at the looks of your friends' faces (sans Jungkook, because you refuse to look at him) if you didn't feel so nervous.
You join in the conversation as well, not an ounce of sadness shown on your face. You don't want your situation with Jungkook to affect the rest of your friends.
The both of you never address each other directly, but you do feel him looking at you from time to time.
You place the cookies in the middle of the table. Like old times, Jihyo counts all the cookies and tells everyone they can only have three pieces each. Mingyu eats more than three. The three of them fight over the last piece, Jimin proposing that they battle it out through rock paper scissors.
You're laughing at the scene in front of you. Good thing you saved some for yourself back at your apartment.
Amidst the chaos, you feel Jungkook lean over the table to whisper in your ear.
"You got more cookies back at yours?"
Your body stiffens at the proximity. Usually you'd say yes. He'd follow you home, make some small talk while you place cookies in a ziplock for him, then he'd hug you goodbye.
That was before the agreement. It was essentially the same routine when you started sleeping with each other, though of course he'd stay a little bit longer.
You turn your head and look at him for the first time. You will yourself not to cry, to steel your emotions.
He looks so soft, so comfy like he just rolled out of bed. He's wearing a beanie to tame his curls, and he's wearing one of his oversized shirts paired with gray sweatpants.
He smells good too. And you realize that you really, really miss him.
"Yeah," you say just as quietly. You feel your heart lighten, but your head's screaming at you to reject him.
Jungkook doesn't say anything else and neither do you. You wait for your friends to finish eating and once everyone stands up, Jungkook walks to your side. Jihyo looks at you quizzically but you just shake your head, silently telling her not to voice out anything out loud. You say your goodbyes and start walking towards your apartment, Jungkook right beside you.
It's silent. And a little bit awkward. You're thinking of what to tell him, whether he wants to talk about what happened, or he just wants your damn cookies.
You close the door behind the both of you and you immediately walk to your small kitchen, grabbing the container of extra cookies and putting some in a ziplock, like you usually do. You feel from the corner of your eyes that Jungkook's watching you, and you feel like your heart is about to burst at what he might say.
"About that night..." he starts.
You sigh and drop the cookies on the counter, turning to him to look at him directly. For the first time in a while, Jungkook looks nervous. Fingers fidgeting, shifting his weight from one foot to the other.
"You know I like you, right?" you suddenly say.
"Yeah," he answers right away without a beat of hesitation.
"Then I want to stop whatever it is we have between us."
You watch Jungkook's face for his reaction. How his eyes widen, how he clenches and unclenches his fists, how his chest rises up and down in quick beats.
"Why?" he simply asks.
You bite your lip in thought, thinking of the right words to say. "I can't let you treat me like shit anymore, Jungkook. It's not healthy for the both of us. I don't know how you feel or what you want but look," you sigh. "You punched Jimin because what? Because I slept with him?"
"What if I want us to try?"
Now it's your turn for your eyes to widen, for your heart to lurch in your chest, body seizing at the question. Acting the same way you did when he asked the first time.
"Try?"
Jungkook nods, lips pursed as he walks closer to you. "You and me. Let's try. No more fooling around with other people." He swears under his breath as he comes to stand in front of you, both arms caging you against the counter. He breathes out and rests his forehead against yours, eyes closed like he's tired.
You're tired as well. But you let him do what he wants. Like you always do.
"(Y/N)," he starts to say. "Look, I— The thought of you sleeping with someone else... It made me crazy," he laughs dryly.
You lean back and scrunch your eyebrows at him. "Jungkook, I'm not some object for you to be possessive over. You just can't—"
"I don't mean it like that," he says, looking at you directly now. Your knees would've buckled at the intensity of his gaze were it not for your body leaning on the kitchen counter. "I just mean..." He turns his head to look away. "I just mean I can't bear the thought of you being with someone else anymore. Doing the things we do."
You open your mouth in reply then close it again when you realize you don't know what to say. You've been waiting to hear this confession for so long, but now that you've heard it, you're suddenly not happy. You're unsure. Guarded. Hurt.
"Jungkook," you whisper unsurely.
He turns his head back to you, gaze right on your lips before he locks eyes with you again.
"We can try. Please," he whispers. It's weird seeing Jungkook this way, all vulnerable and desperate. Begging. Usually, you'd be in his position. Not the other way around. "I promise this time."
You feel your resolve slowly crumbling. All the walls you've built up from your last interaction with him come falling down. You should hate yourself, you really should. But you know where your heart lies. What it wants. That you'd take any inkling of love he'd give you. Even if he may not mean it. Even if it might not last forever.
"Okay," you say, and the moment you do, you see the most beautiful smile grace his face. It makes you smile as well, ignoring the little voice in the back of your head to say no. "But we start slowly, alright?"
He nods his head, smile still there, body slowly pressing against yours. He nuzzles his head in the crook of your neck and your arms automatically go around him.
"Kook," you sigh. "We should probably talk first—"
"In the morning, baby," he says in between the kisses he's placing on your shoulder. "I promise."
You play with his hair while Jungkook does what he wants. Kissing your shoulder, your collarbone, up to your jaw. It's playful at first, big smooches echoing in your apartment. Then it starts getting heated the moment you feel his tongue on your skin.
"J-Jungkook," you stutter.
He grips your waist and lifts you up so you're seated on the counter. "You drive me crazy, I hope you know that."
You smile at him and say nothing else as you grab his face towards yours, finally reconnecting your lips with his. It's soft and sensual, no sense of urgency like how you usually kiss. Like how Jungkook had somewhere to be after. Or that he wanted to get it over with.
He's taking his time now by the way his lips mold slowly against yours, like he wants to map out how you taste, how you feel, how your tongue feels like pressed against his.
You stay like that for a while, just kissing and basking in each other's presence. Jungkook holds your waist firmly like he doesn't want to let go. Frankly, you don't want him to either.
You start getting antsy so you grab the hem of his shirt and try to slip it over his head. He laughs at your impatience as you throw the shirt somewhere in your apartment, hands going to his back instantly. Scratching your nails lightly down his skin, leaving goosebumps in its wake. Then your hands go down to his pants and you start toying with his jeans.
"Sweetheart," he leans back and chuckles. He holds your face gently. "There's no need to rush, okay? We've got all the time in the world."
You lean back as well, exhaling the breath you didn't know you were holding. "Okay," you agree. "Yeah, sorry."
"Let me take my time with you," he murmurs as he leans in again to kiss you.
Jungkook does his take time. Practically kisses every inch of your skin. Takes off your clothing one by one. Fingers you slowly that you're seeing stars. Cleans you up with his mouth that you're left breathless and dizzy. Disoriented. You're both (finally) naked by the time you're in bed.
"Look at yourself, baby," he whispers right into your ear.
His words go in your ear and out the other, head too clouded with the mind blowing orgasm he just gave you. You don't understand what he's telling you to do until he gently grabs your chin and turns it to where he wants you to look. Your eyes spot your full length mirror. You see yourself, bare and sitting on the bed with your legs folded beneath you, thighs open and pussy on display. Jungkook's right behind you in a similar position, body so big and wide that you notice the stark difference of your bodies.
You see your chest heaving up and down, tits moving in sync with your breaths. Your hands are resting on his thighs. Jungkook slithers his arm to wrap around your waist. Finally, you lock eyes with him through the mirror.
"See?" he says, though you don't really know what he wants you to see. "You look so pretty. S'why I can't get enough of you."
"Oh," you breathe out.
"Yeah, oh," Jungkook chuckles lightly. "Gonna fuck you now, okay?"
You nod your head in reply and Jungkook lifts you up a bit to enter you from behind. You gasp when he fills you up right away, a perfect fit like always. He starts thrusting slowly but deeply, and you feel his tip kiss your cervix each time. You would've toppled forward were it not for his protective hold around your waist.
"Feels good," you finally moan out.
"I know, baby," he pants from behind you. "You take me so well. Like you were made for me. Like we were made for each other."
Your heart seizes at that, and all words get stuck in your throat when Jungkook picks up the pace of his thrusts, both hands going to your chest to cup your breasts.
Jungkook presses his chest to your back, practically molding himself around your body, you're starting to feel as one. He buries his face in the crook of your neck, lips on your sweaty skin.
"I might not last long," he grunts.
"Me too," you mewl. It stays silent for a while, just both your breaths filling the room. It's not like you need to say anything, to be vocal like you both usually are. It's different this time and you know Jungkook can feel it too. With the way his body is pressed to yours, to his tight hold on you like you might disappear into thin air if he lets go, how his mouth never seems to leave your skin, how your hand holds his. Like you're too overwhelmed with the events that happened today, the past few weeks—since this started. That it's all coming to an end, but an end with a new beautiful beginning. It feels overwhelming because you're entering new territory. You still have your doubts (you don't think those will ever leave), but at least now you're on the same page with Jungkook. Together. Jumping into the unknown. Even if you're not sure how this will turn out—being together with him, for real this time. If it'll end in greater heartbreak or will be your best decision yet. But you're here because you want to try. You've let him in because you want to try. Because your heart has been with his from the start, you realize.
You're brought back to reality when Jungkook brings his hand up to wrap around your throat—not tightly, a hold barely there but firm enough to know he has you in his hold. You stare at yourself again in the mirror, at Jungkook moving his hips from behind you. How you're so pressed into each other.
"Jungkook," you choke out, suddenly so overwhelmed and full of emotion. His gaze shifts from your body to your face, looking at you through the mirror so intently you feel like melting. You move your hips back to meet his thrusts, your body feeling like it's on fire and that you might snap soon. "Kook, I—"
"I know, baby," he murmured. "I know." Knows that you're close, that this moment feels different, electrifying. "I got you, okay?" he whispers so sweetly. You lean your head back against his shoulder. "Let go for me. Hm?"
"Okay," you whisper, eyes closing and focusing on doing just that. It doesn't take you much longer to reach your peak, to let go and let the pleasure take control of your body. It comes to you gradually, getting stronger and stronger, and Jungkook talks you through it all. Though you can't make out his words since everything sounds so muffled. Like you're under water and the wave's crashed.
"Gonna come too," he grunts. "You're so beautiful when you come, baby. I can't—"
Jungkook reaches his orgasm after and fills up the condom. Fucks you so slow and deep through his high it sets you off once more. Don't realize that his finger is rubbing your clit slowly. Like he wanted you to reach your high again.
"That's it," he whispers. "So good for me."
You almost fall face first on your bed, but Jungkook catches you with a hand around your waist. Moves you around the bed so that you're laying on your back with him right beside you. You curl into him instantly as his arm wraps around your shoulder. He brings his lips to the crown of your head and places a gentle kiss.
You close your eyes and listen to the beat of his heart slowing down, focusing on the rise and fall of his chest. "We need to clean up soon," you mumble after a while.
"I'll do it," he mumbles back. "Let me just— Let me catch my breath first."
You laugh lightly, your body slowly succumbing to sleep. You feel Jungkook stand up and for a second your heart seizes in your chest. You keep your eyes closed while you try to listen for any sounds of clothes being picked up, of him getting dressed.
All you hear is your bathroom door being open then closed, then you feel a damp washcloth between your legs, and only then does your heart start beating again. Jungkook's back beside you in bed a few moments later, and then you finally succumb to sleep.
..••°°°°••..°°••....••°°..••°°°°••..
An alarm wakes you up the next morning. You know it isn't yours since it's not the usual ringtone you use. You open your eyes slowly and smile sleepily at Jungkook's arm draped across your waist. You look back to see him sleeping peacefully, mouth slightly ajar. You reach your arm out to your beside table to look for the noisy phone, realizing it's Jungkook's when you bring it close to your face to turn off the alarm.
You notice he's gotten a few notifications since last night, are about to place it back on your table when a text stands out to you. Waking you up fully. Your tummy churning, your breath seizing.
You can't see the preview of the message, but the name is enough to leave you feeling dizzy.
It's from Iseul. You know her because she's one of Jungkook's regulars. And you know this because she texts him a lot, her name always popping up in his phone. Not that you secretly went through it before, but sometimes Jungkook likes showing his phone to you and your friends, either of a cool photo he took lately or some random meme.
You try to stop your thoughts from thinking of the worst, but you can't help it. You and Jungkook haven't talked much about your relationship, because there is a lot to talk about. You know it won't all be fixed in one sitting. So you don't know if they're still seeing each other. You don't know if he meant what he said last night.
You start feeling ill, your palms sweating and your head beginning to pound. You find yourself standing up, getting dressed and grabbing just your phone with you. Never mind the fact that you're leaving Jungkook yet you're in your place. That he might still be here when you're back, whenever that will be. For the first time since you started this thing with him, you leave without saying goodbye.
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inferencesarchives · 11 months
Note
Hello! Could you do Pure Vanilla Cookie x Fem! Ancient reader, whose kingdom is like a spiritual kingdom and The Reader Is just very stressed?? Like, very little time to eat, sleep, ect. How could PV maybe comfort her?? Have a nice day!!
`•- Time for Yourself
pure vanilla cookie x fem reader
summary: pure vanilla notices you haven't been acting like yourself lately. how does he help you feel better?
warnings: physical touch, pure vanilla is kind of a worry wart, also im not super proud of the writing on this one so im sorry if it's not as good as my other stuff :((
a/n: is it bad that when i went to the store today and saw pure vanilla extract on the shelf i thought of pure vanilla cookie
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Pure Vanilla Cookie has noticed the lack of letters you've been sending him recently.
Of course, he knows that ruling a kingdom is no simple ordeal, and, of course, there's no way you would be able to send him a letter every day. However, despite that, you've always made sure to send him letters frequently and inform him of every nifty little thing going on in your life.
That is, up until roughly three and a half weeks ago.
You used to send him letters every four or five days to keep him updated on everything going on in your kingdom, and he always wrote back when he received your letters. However, when he responded to a letter you sent about three and a half weeks ago, you hadn't written anything back to him.
He found this behavior very strange, as you were always enthusiastic about being able to talk with him whenever you got the chance. Pure Vanilla Cookie was, frankly, getting rather worried about you and how you were doing. So, he decided to take a trip over to your kingdom to see for himself what was wrong.
When he finally arrived, Pure Vanilla Cookie was quick to stride towards your castle, making haste towards your office, where you spent most of your time. Gently knocking on the door, he quietly entered the room, as to not disturb you too much. He immediately notices your eyebags, the empty coffee mugs littered around your desk, and the way you don't even glance at him when he enters the room, thinking it was just some servant needing to ask a quick question or something of the like. Needless to say, when he spoke up, you immediately turned and stared at him in surprise.
"My Dear, has everything been okay lately?" He gently asks. "Ah! Pure Vanilla Cookie? What are you doing here?" You respond, shocked. You had no idea he was coming, you had no time to prepare, you didn't want him to see you like this.
"Are you alright?" He slowly walks toward you before draping his cloak over your shoulders, "You haven't responded to my letter for weeks, and you look awfully tired. How long have you been sitting here working today?" He looks at you with worry swirling in his eyes.
As you sit there failing to answer his question, he gently places a hand on your head and caresses your hair, sighing, "You need to remember to take care of yourself, you know. You can hardly handle this much work in the state that you're in. Why don't you rest for a bit?"
You look at him with tired eyes, attempting to provide a counter-argument, "I know, I know, but-" "No buts. You're going to go lay in bed and read a nice book to help you de-stress. I'll also fetch you some tea. Then, perhaps you can take a nap. You'll feel a lot better when you wake up," He suddenly picked you up, carrying you back to your bedroom before you can even say anything. Perhaps he was right though, as you were indeed doing a lot better the next morning. Perhaps self-care really is important after all.
a/n: not me writing a fic about self-care at 2 am when i haven't slept and i am in fact not taking care of myself lmao uhhhhhh i promise ill get some sleep once i finish up the rest of the requests i swear i pinky promise i swear
thanks for reading, and remember to take care of yourself! don't be like me lmao
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slowlysoluminary · 3 months
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after that wack-tastic piece of media i figured we could all!! use a break!!!!!!! so!!!!!!
(more) doodles below the cut. and some commentary! Hurray!
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^^ Post game is interesting. Most of the timeloop is about figuring the deal with the memories, some of it is about sif comng to terms with the king, and the very very end of it is about everyone regaining their memories.
so i say it again post game is REALLY interesting!!! because everyone, collectively, is trying to balance their old memories and their new memories. everyone except siffrin. who is not 1:1 old siffrin but is the closest to it, considering how much loop's been through.
loop??? becomes corporeal at some point in the end.
it's very bittersweet! i think! the whole of the party does an "i want to remember!!!" sequence, fighting with their own minds to fill the gaping holes they'd always ignored.
-- loop, after realizing the extent to which they're familiar with the party, had tried desperately to get the party to remember them throughout the loops. in hopes that something would change. they never remembered.
at the same time, siffrin is talking to the king - they're fighting with eachother physically and verbally, desperately trying to get the other understand. resetfrin is not the siffrin the king hated so earnestly, not the siffrin he tried to snuff out.
over the course of many conversations with the king, siffrin caught on. the king is the major lore dump here and is who causes most of the narrative development because i say so !!!!!!!!!!!!
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actually. about post game. do you know why their designs are like that
resetfrin hated the lack of autonomy he had over their own body so they decided to. cut their hair. it's a bit curlier now that there's not a lot weighing it down
they decided not to keep the star stuff the king gave them. yada yada character development or whatever.
they gave their cloak to loop!! who is. siffrin again. physically at least. both siffrins are siffrin but with clear differences! like hair length and hair texture! and ohhhhhhhh no what do you mean the universe gave them the wrong body?? what?????? how cruel!!! how blasphemous!!!!!!!
loop hated the idea of keeping her hair darkless (mirror pronouns for loop btw!!! remember that!!!). it reminded them of what it was like to be ghostloop. which they hated!!! but they couldn't have their hair be lightless because that was resetfrin's new thing, so... they just. kept dying the bottom parts of it lightless. it's a compromise
how does the party distinguish the two siffrins, name-wise? uhhhhhh. ask me that question later. idk.
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if.... if i have pre-game planned out. and post-game planned out.
then the inly thing I don't have planned out is the ACTUAL time loop bit
it's quite daunting because? that's like the entire point of the original game? it feels like i hve to live up to so much and like fhe loops have to have such a packed, coherent story
though, to be fair, most of what I'm writing will just be. the time loop bit. so i guess I'm figuring it out as i go
anyway, actually talking about the two sketches above, ghostloop is for SIFFRIN'S EYES ONLY!!! she can hit things but things can't hit her and all that.
after figuring out, through past loops, that the King can't see them, they realized siffrin was their only connection to the physical world. The Last Piece Left of them, physically and metaphorically. the whole time they longed for something else to acknowledge their existence. acknowledge theyre real
they also realize they can do Fuckery
the king has a Sixth Sense for loop's Fuckery,,, flipping him The Bird resulted in a rather quick death for Siffrin. whoops!!!!!
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this au is. more closely revolved around gloop than i thought. don't worry!! i have a lot of gloop content planned! but. but you need to understand the pain of resetfrin and the king. the misery snd desperation fhe king felt about his country. siffrin pleading with the king, countlessly, hoping to see some SEMBLANCE of the man he once knew. you need to know the missing pieces the party finds, a hollow feeling settling itself around their hearts. you need to know so bad.
so you'll get gloop content! i am a big fan of the little guy myself, really. but !!! this au is not ONLY about them, believe it or not! hehe. haha. giggles. ok ill stop
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