#minus the part where she explodes

[this-aint-massachusetts]

K… hear me out for a second

[yostresswritinggirl]

What Do You Mean I'm The New Grand Sage?!

Alhaitham, Cyno, Tighnari, Kaveh x Grand Sage! Reader; separate, gender neutral

In some twisted turn of events, Lesser Lord Kusanali herself thought you are the best candidate for the position of the Akademiya's Grand Sage. From a Haravatat Researcher to soon running a whole region, how do you deal with this? And do the prodigal scholars approve of you?

'It's been weeks now and there's still no proper Grand Sage.'

'If it were me, I would have fired the two remaining sages, they might scheme as revenge.'

'How can we trust the choices of the next Grand Sage anyways? What if history repeats itself?'

Despite the House of Daena being respectfully quiet with only murmurs and mumbles from the surrounding entourage, these unspoken words taunt and occupy the mind of the Dendro Archon as she takes into account all the thoughts of her people regarding the matter.

All the candidates for the Grand Sage and other sage positions, as well as the exceptional figures of each darshan (some of which are familiar to her) crowd around the table where the Lesser Lord situated herself.

Unfortunately, based on Nahida's standards, none of them qualify for the position.

"Lesser Lord Kusanali?" Opening her eyes, Nahida tilts her head to the Scribe situated on a seat next to her, a quill unused in his hand. "Is something the matter?"

"Just deep in thought." Crossing her arms, the god of wisdom would hum to herself as she tapped her chin. "For example, what would the new Grand Sage do once they get appointed?" And with that, she closed her eyes again.

As expected, more thoughts filtered through her mind as the audience took the bait and began pondering on the provoking question in their minds.

'Just do what the past Grand Sage did? Minus the evil? This is easy.'

'As a Grand Sage, I would probably fire all the personnel, they can't be trusted.'

'Cultivate wisdom and govern Sumeru as best as possible, right?'

'With the Lesser Lord in power, probably just answer to what she wants.'

'Hm, to what extent did Azar mess up the system anyways? It would definitely be good to fix the things that he deliberately abused as soon as possible, right? The unnecessary laws, look into the international affair decisions he's done too, he might have signed contracts that would be damaging to Sumeru in the long run -'

A hit! But an unfamiliar voice. Opening her eyes, the god of wisdom looked around the area to look for the voice to match a face.

"Are you looking for something, Lord Kusanali?" Cyno straightened up on his stance by her side as he watched the archon stand on her seat. The action urged him to scan the area too, albeit for different reasons.

'Why am I thinking about this right now? I should really hurry home -'

"Over there!" The crowd parts like the sea as everyone in the area turned towards someone in researcher garb. Which looks to be... drenched in water. Looking up from wringing the sleeves of your robe, you finally notice all the attention on you.

"Ah! Sorry about the mess, I fell in the fountain in front of -"

"You shall be the new Grand Sage, (Y/N)."

The whole Akademiya seemed to have quieted down to the point that you could hear the individual droplets of water splatter from your hair on to the marble flooring of the House of Daena.

"Huh?"

And like catharsis, everyone exploded in exclamations of disbelief. Including you.

"With their determination alone, their steadfast effort is enough to shape them to the right person to hold the title of Grand Sage."

With the absence of the Akasha Terminal and the person that holds records of documentations and research, Alhaitham was reasonably the person that people flocked towards for information about you. Despite the inconvenience, there are a lucky few that the Scribe entertained.

The male personally knows you as a Haravatat graduate who researched about the current civilization and quality of life of Sumeru in great detail, something that honored your name for being their darshan's most cited thesis. And when asked about your eligibility to be the next Grand Sage, he repeats those words, even when the archon herself asked.

After all, he himself had been privy to that determination. Your dedication to graduate and use your knowledge to create something worthwhile, beneficial, purposeful. A kind of vigor for knowledge so pure and immense that not even he remembers having the same amount of passion.

Even now as he pretends to be occupied with his book, he watches as you practically lay on the huge table for Azar the Grand Sage in exhaustion, Alhaitham was confident that your sighs results from your worry of finding the best solution.

He lowers his eyes back to the pages just in time with you finally lifting your head. "Alhaitham?" He pretends the small smile was out of politeness, not because you have yet to get accustomed to being entirely formal with him.

"Yes, Future Grand Sage?" Alhaitham masks his voiceless laugh with the book in his hand at the sight of you huffing, sputtering at the foreign title.

"Azar had you draft the gazette when he makes up a new law or order, right?" He nods, you grip your head as if you were having a headache, which is quite likely at this point. "If you don't mind, do you think you can give me a copy of all of the laws he created? And the meeting transcripts too?"

"That is certainly doable. However," you straightened up when Alhaitham stood across the table to stare you eye to eye, placing his book on your table. "That would be hundreds of documents to go through, are you sure you're able to utilize that amount for your perusing?"

The expression on your face showed that you haven't exactly accounted that part. But there it was, that flicker in your eyes that captures you so perfectly, the perseverance that had always kept you afloat. Now he can bare witness to it. "I'm sure."

Even if he didn't have to, Alhaitham stayed by your side the whole time, assisting you about certain laws and contexts if you ever needed it.

And when you fell asleep on the table after hours of reading, he immediately placed his cape on your shoulders, because you needed it.

Surprisingly enough, Alhaitham is the one who puts in a good word about your designation out of all of them.

What they're unaware of is that he's quite fond of you and your prestige, being in the same darshan had him subtly defending you from the rumors other darshans/candidates spread.

You should be grateful that you have Alhaitham as your Scribe. Not only is he meticulous and dedicated to his work, but he acts as your assistant with how closely related your positions are.

Perhaps his usefulness and help also stems with the fact that he was the most recommended candidate before he declined, and the knowledge he had honestly makes him look like your master and you his apprentice.

A lot of times, you end up comparing yourself to him when you feel like you're lacking.

Thankfully, Alhaitham's perceptive made him aware of your tells, and knows when you're having such thoughts. He would try to derail that train of thought immediately, subtly remind you of your progress, or straight up tell you you're wrong.

For such an emotionless co-worker, he sure does well with being your hypeman.

"A lack of harmonious relationship with the archon, even with the people of Sumeru, became the downfall of Azar, . That level of respect is crucial in ensuring that history would not repeat itself."

As Lesser Lord Kusanali's main guardian, it was only logical that his beliefs about what the new grand sage should embody reflects that. And perhaps there were also some details that influenced his opinion, details that he would never elaborate on.

This isn't the first time he had been less receptive to the decisions of the archon (the first being the punishment of the Sages, if you can even call it that) but this one has more potential to go awry than any other.

His cold stare only grew colder, sharper, now that you've been assigned the highest seat in the Akademiya. You can tell his prejudices without him having to spell it out.

The harshest of glares usually happen when you request an audience with the god of wisdom, him always standing by her side in case you become hostile. Which is honestly quite a hilarious take - you? Harming a god? But with the history of the previous Grand Sage's you can't exactly call his fault.

In your case however, despite the stories of Cyno's job as the General Mahamatra, you never once feared the possibility of his judgment on you as an academic. After all, if you had done nothing bad, then you're out of his case, right? So as far as you know, this is your first time knowing about each other's presence.

Although, being nominated after you fell in the Akademiya's fountain and made a mess everywhere you walked certainly isn't the best first impression.

However, after one too many times you feel a chill up your spine yet see no one when you look around the area for a possible cause, you're starting to suspect that he may know you more than you know him.

"She's currently resting in the Sanctuary of Surasthana, don't -"

"Ah, no, I'm not here to ask about Lesser Lord Kusanali today." At your sheepish demeanor, Cyno opted to close his mouth and wait for your reason to approach him. So you continued. "I was actually hoping if you could accompany me to Aaru Village."

"The desert?" Why him?

"I've heard that you've been closely working with Lesser Lord Kusanali to rebuild the relations with the desert side of Sumeru." Your fidgeting made him notice the thick notebook tucked under your arm. "I wanted to ask questions about the details, as well as see for myself what else could be done."

There was a long pause of silence that passed by with you mostly avoiding looking into his eyes directly. Humbled but respectful. Cyno sighs. "You're not in proper attire to journey to the desert, nor do you have the proper equipment." Your gaze followed his retreating form until he stopped and looked over his shoulder to you. "Are you coming or what? Standing around does not count as preparing."

"Right! I'm on it!"

It was a long process, but you managed to convince Cyno of your worth, especially when it comes to your efforts to help the desert. He had seen it all himself and at this point he couldn't deny it any further.

Cyno would find his tailing to be out of security instead of suspicion, often times finding himself walking by your side as your protector whenever you had to go out. After all, you're still an important figure, your safety is high priority.

Soon, it would be you who he would go to concerning updates about the desert, hearing out your efforts for rehabilitation. Your desert internship program to help Setaria with her education efforts is by far his favorite.

Despite being the General Mahamatra, he found a bit of his job description changing: being the protector of the Dendro Archon and the new Grand Sage.

Whenever you have to cross to the desert to either talk with the village chief or negotiate with the Eremites, he would always find time in his schedule to be your escort.

Perhaps it was his mistake to doubt Alhaitham's judgment on this one. At the very least, Cyno became your ever reliable check-and-balance.

"At the end of the day, well intentions are enough of a factor to understand the path one would trek no matter the adversaries."

Tighnari was positive that he wouldn't have to deal with the Akademiya anymore after Lesser Lord Kusanali, maybe even enjoy a more peaceful life in the forest now that the Withering had stopped spawning together with Eleazar disappearing.

But of course, the exiled sages just had to be dropped into his forest for their 'tap on the wrist' punishment. Perhaps that would be the end of the Akademiya pestering him now that there's no need to exploit him for some evil scheme.

Well, the world had never been to kind to the forest watcher, what would make this any different? The hybrid would sigh as he watched a group donning Akademiya robes approach Ghandarva Ville, none of which he's familiar with.

This is a larger group compared to the ones the previous sages trying to coerce him back to the city brought - now that he squints, there seem to be Corps of Thirsty members tailing the group, too. This doesn't bode well at all.

At least Cyno's there. "And what business do you have in Ghandarva Ville to cause such a ruckus so early in the day?" Straight to the point, Tighnari stares dryly at the person that seems to be in charge of the group.

However, at the sight of Cyno freezing up in his peripheral, the forest watcher immediately realized that this is unlike any other encounters he had dealt with. Unlike the arrogance of the other scholars and sages, he could see how you looked conflicted from speaking.

"Seeing as you don't look to be well-informed," ah there's the Akademiya scholar he expected. The researcher gestures to you. "The Future Grand Sage is here to see the exiled former sages in hopes to interview them about their previous positions."

He wants to bite back, he really does - why was he not informed beforehand? Why are there so many personnel with you? How sure are they that you are not trying to conspire with Azar? Why are YOU the next grand sage?

"Alright." And he will never admit the relief he felt when your despondent look immediately lifted at his response. "It's a bit of a walk from here. And being the person assigned to oversee their training, I would like to be there during the exchange too."

"Thank you." You cut off the arrogant spokesperson before he even uttered a single word of protest, presenting a bulky journal in your hand to the forest watcher. "I actually prepared a set of questions to ask that you could verify -"

Old habits die hard, and admittedly, Tighnari didn't want to treat you more than the people he works with everyday, the people around you can easily do that for him. But he refrained from letting any past prejudice cloud his judgment on your character: there is undoubtedly something different about you in comparison to the old sages, and he didn't want his attitude to change that.

One day during one of your many visits however, Tighnari may have spilled a bit about his discontent about the attention your entourage brings to his forest. Even with you next in charge, he still dislikes bringing the affairs of the Akademiya to the forest rangers' territory.

He thought his words was out of pocket when letters of notice regarding your arrival ceased. Did you get all the information you needed from the sages? Or was what he said finally drove you away? That wasn't at all his intentions.

One random encounter brought him answer when the suspicious cloaked figure waving at him from behind a tree turned out to be you. "You said you didn't want my personnel to come so I decided to visit discreetly from now on."

At least you were... considerate. Conversation came easy without multiple glares constantly stabbing him in the back, talking about your progress as well as the conditions of Ghandarva Ville on the way to the training area of the sages.

While he was wary and skeptical about your appointment despite his utmost trust in the dendro archon's judgment, Tighnari soon came to accept your honesty and determination.

That transparency and good-intended perseverance are what Azar lacked, but under your rule, perhaps Sumeru would really be in good hands now.

Tighnari leaned against the tree as he watched your passionate discussion with the previous Haravatat sage. Undeniably, you as you are now without the title, greatly reminds him of someone dear.

"We've long realized that wisdom alone begets arrogance. Perhaps fixing the prejudices against the pursuit of art and whatever this and that Azar has gotten his grubby hands on should be first priority."

"Let me through! I must speak with them, this is important matter, too! If the new grand sage is really -"

Turning your head towards the commotion, your conversation with Alhaitham ended shortly as a tuft of blonde became visible from the sea of Mahamata's trying to keep him away from you.

Patting the imaginary dust off his sleeves, Kaveh would look into your baffled gaze with unyielding resolve. "I've heard you had been meticulously gathering the opinions of Sumeru and thought I could be of help."

"Exercise some tact, Kaveh, we're in the presence of the appointed Grand Sage here."

"I don't need your sass today, Scribe -"

"No, it's fine, Alhaitham. I was actually planning on talking to Kaveh at some point, anyways." Wait, you are? Kaveh dumbfoundedly asked as he watched you move a few books around to get to a worn out journal under the pile. "I assume you're here to represent the arts."

Besides the conversation, Kaveh insists he takes you out to the Bazaar and his magnum opus to properly showcase the culture. Alhaitham, who looked positively displeased of the impromptu outing, had to stay back to focus on documenting a new batch of submitted thesis.

It was endearing to see someone as passionate about change in Sumeru as you talk about the harmful acts Azar published against the Bazaar and the pursuit of arts. Well, what else can you expect from the Light of the Kshahrewar?

Talking to him about anything and everything felt like you were conversing with friends, a very vocal and expressive friend. Especially when you're introduced to the Palace of Alcazarzaray, something he looks at with both pride and regret.

"I am simply making sure that Alhaitham had not brainwashed you with his sense of morality. Knowing him, you won't gather such thoughts about the importance of arts from him."

"Thank you for bringing this to my attention." You really were, after running around from here to both ends of Sumeru, you're very grateful that your source of info decided to come to you instead. "It's not an easy feat trying to undo 500 years worth of corruption."

"I can already see how Sumeru would be under your care." He flashes a genuine smile. "Thank you for hearing me out as well, future Grand Sage, I'm rooting for you. You're already doing much better than the previous Grand Sage."

It was a simple reassuring squeeze on the shoulder, but when he finally sobered up from the feeling of elation, Kaveh can't help but scream to his pillow about how buddy-buddy he acted to THE FUTURE GRAND SAGE!

Kaveh offers a fresh perspective and a lighter, reassuring encouragement in comparison. Perhaps being the person who knows less of the details helped form a positive judgment.

Like Tighnari, he keeps a level-headed approach when it comes to your position, but less about respect and more on shared beliefs.

When it comes to efforts to rehabilitate certain areas, Kaveh is always quick to offer his guidance and opinion. He knows you trust him due to his honesty and genuine want for a better future for Sumeru.

He's also the type to casually waltz in to your office when he has a brilliant idea or important information to share. At this point, he's talked to you more than the new Kshahrewar sage - if he's so adamant to be heard, why didn't he accept the nomination?

Whenever he stumbles upon you when you're outside or he sees you pondering the giant orb™ in your office, he's quick to voice his concern and urge you to take a break.

His intentions recently are hard to read, but he really does believe in you, and he's not shy to voice that fact.

You just find yourself missing the quietness of your office before Alhaitham and Kaveh's banter in front of your table became commonplace.

"The Akademiya and Sumeru as a whole would surely flourish under this new samsara if I were to lead it with you by my side."

Lesser Lord Kusanali gives a knowing look at the sight of you standing straight in the presence of the archon, opting to offer your seat (which she declined) and refusing to sit down as a sign of respect.

She didn't need to read your mind to know. "How have you been? I've heard from the others that you've been working really hard to prepare for your inauguration."

Conscious, you pulled at the grey sleeve signifying your position as the current sage of Haravatat. Admittedly, it was a little stiff and stuffy for you, thicker and more uncomfortable than your uniforms in the Akademiya as a scholar and researcher. You missed those times.

"I've gathered a lot of opinions and information about operating as a sage as well as the current matters of Sumeru." Nahida smiles widely at this, before her expression faltered when you still had a bothered look on your face.

As far as she knows, you've gathered all the resources you need, more than you need even. So why do you seem troubled still despite your meticulous preparation? "Is there something in your mind?"

"I don't - I respect your wisdom, I really do and I'm honored that you think of me this way. But I'm - is this really the right decision? Am I really fit for this?"

Oh, so it's about that! You looked up from your journal laying on the table at the sound of the dendro archon's giggles, not at all expecting that reaction. Was your question that laughable?

"Not at all, I'm just amazed that you haven't noticed." Floating over to where you stood, her tiny hands reached up to give you - head pats? Embarrassed but too scared to deny, you took the gesture. "Since that day, I was certain that there would be no other puzzle piece that would fit the position of Grand Sage other than you."

You part your lips to interject, but she was quicker.

"And besides, there are many who share my view. I'm not the only one who believes in you, and you will see it for yourself when the time comes."

"When the time comes?" Holding on to your hand, Nahida starts pulling you towards the elevator and out of the House of Daena. Only when you reached the double doors of the Akademiya did she finally let go.

"You have these doubts because you are a good person, (Y/N). And even then, your own thoughts cloud your mind from seeing that the only person that doubts you now," Nahida would gesture towards the door. "Is you."

Looking back and forth between the entrance and Nahida's encouraging smile, you took a deep breath before pushing open the door -

Only to be met by a roar of cheers and explosion of applause.

Your fellow Sages, Alhaitham, Cyno, Kaveh, even Tighnari (with his ears pressed down) stood near the entrance with smiles of their own. But looking past the Akademiya staff and scholars, a crowd made up of Sumeru citizens from Port Ormos, the Bazaar, Ghandarva Ville, and even Aaru Village occupy the platform and every inch of the paths going up and down the Divine Tree.

Their collective chants mixed together to convey their utmost respect and belief in you.

"Every single one of them are here to root for you," turning to your side, Nahida stood next to you with a gray hat cradled on her palms. "Grand Sage."

Biting your lip to stop a big wobbly grin, you finally let out a relieved sigh as you kneeled in front of the god of wisdom, closing your eyes as she walked forward to place the hat of the Grand Sage on your head.

"People of Sumeru, may I present to you the new Grand Sage, (Y/N)."

The overwhelming amount of support from everyone made you take off your monocle to rub at your eyes.

And when your biggest supporters stepped forward to congratulate you, everything felt just right.

You got this.

Can't believe my random idea got written first lmaao alright we're in the good feels arc now

@ireallylikehamsters

[cultofdixon]

Relapsing back to old habits

Daryl Dixon [PLATONIC] • She/Her Pronouns • Youngest Dixon Sister!Reader • It’s been years since the world fell and Daryl thought you would tell him anything that bothered you. But here you were finding out your brother found your stash • ANGST/SFW • TW: Relapses / Marijuana / Scars / Injuries

Requested by: Anon

“Y/N?” Daryl called out when he entered the house after taking his morning watch. “I could use a hand with the snares around the gates”

Nothing. Which…was weird for his sister. But even then, she’s not the excited little girl that would come running at a full sprint to greet her brother anymore. She still would greet him with her presence minus the bone crushing hug.

To be honest with you, Daryl wished she didn’t grow up in the conditions that she did. Let alone grow up in an apocalypse. The end of the world changed everybody.

Daryl decided to make his way to her bedroom to see if she was in there. The Dixons stay with the Grimes given Carol moved to the Kingdom. The two help with the kids, ever since Rick’s disappearance.

It was a lot.

Whoever didn’t feel for Michonne, was just an asshole. Imagine finding out you’re pregnant while your husband explodes.

Then there’s Daryl, you’ve lost so much in this lifetime that the closest thing to a brother just is gone with zero remains…who knows what’s he’s battling internally.

The last thing he’d want is to lose his sister in all this mess. He wanted to spend time with her in that moment but not finding her was irritating him.

“Where is that girl” Daryl frowns knocking on her bedroom door only for no reply so he decides to open it.

He likes to remember when they used to live in a one bedroom apartment with Merle.

During arguments Y/N would storm off and close her door in Daryl’s face that it annoyed him to where he’d tell her “don’t make me remove this door”

But he never did. Hell, he added a lock to the door because of Merle’s high escapades getting more aggressive

Daryl checked around the room for any signs of her leaving but even if Y/N is an adult now and doesn’t need him to know where she’s at 24/7…it’s a security thing for her for him to know. Her calling card is leaving her lucky rabbit’s foot that he got her during their prison days on her night stand to tell him she’s still around. She doesn’t leave the community without it.

As he went to pick it up, he kicked something under her bed and while part of him shouldn’t check it. He decided to do so anyway.

To Daryl’s surprise…a rather unpleasant one

“Fuck…” Daryl frowns opening the box to find her stash. It was two boxes of smokes, a baggie with what he assumes to be weed, and the obvious lighter. I thought she quit he only started to feel worse.

The fuck you have there?!

U-Uhm. Weed?

Y/N. You didn’t get that from Merle did you?! His shit is always laced with something! Please fucking tell me—-

No! I didn’t! I got it from a friend…I wasn’t going to smoke it

For the love of whatever god out there. Don’t ever.

Daryl it’s not going to kill me…

“C’mon Dog, gotta grab my gear before Daryl comes” Her voice echoed the hall causing Daryl to freeze in his place knowing damn well he won’t be able to escape.

Dog nudged the door open with his snoot and stared directly at Daryl. He found a Mal pup in the woods and thought Y/N could use a companion when he was gone looking for Rick.

All the eldest Dixon could do was stare directly at Dog and wait for his sister to shortly come in to notice the staring contest. More importantly the box where she keeps her stash being open in Daryl’s lap.

They’re just cigarettes, bubs. You smoke them

Yeah, don’t mean by baby sister should

As much as I appreciate you being the father figure in my life over Merle. You gotta realize it’s the end of the world. Once the pack is gone, I won’t do it anymore.

You promise?

If it helps you sleep at night, Dar. I promise

Y/N was now the one staring blankly at Daryl as she shoves her hands in her coat pockets not uttering a word. But also not freaking out either. She didn’t want this to become an argument so she walked toward him taking the box from his hands and setting it on the nightstand. Next to be grabbed was her rabbit’s foot as she attaches it to her belt loop on her pants.

“My bow is downstairs, I gotta pack my bag. Mind waiting down there?” Y/N knew what his original intentions were, given Aaron was informed what he was doing and when he saw her walking the community he informed her of her brother’s whereabouts.

The eldest Dixon decided to listen and leave to meet her downstairs.

Soon the two were walking the woods tracking a deer, Y/N glances every once in a while toward Dog who happily trotted beside her in a sweater she made for him. Ignoring the worry filled silence coming from her brother. She seems to have to break the silence more nowadays.

“Any news? On Rick?”

“Nah…was thinking of expandin’ my search. Go further up the river”

“Mm.” Y/N frowns turning away from her brother to check some damage done to a tree to see if it’s a walker or something else.

Daryl watches her carefully noticing her saddened expression after telling her plans about heading further away in the search for Rick. He only snapped out of it when they heard the snap of twigs and spotting the deer.

Before Daryl could even ready his crossbow, Y/N stopped him which he then noticed the two babies with the deer.

“You promised”

“So did you” Y/N frowns walking away to go further into the woods without disturbing the deer and in hopes of finding something else.

You said you’d stay this time

I am gonna stay. Michonne just had RJ and the community needs help.

Is that all?

What do you mean?

The end of the world took a lot from me too Daryl. The last thing I’d want is to lose you too

You won’t ever lose me, bug.

You don’t know that.

Y/N…what do you want me to do? To reassure yea that I’m not going anywhere.

Please just stay. Go out until nightfall, come home at the end of the day. Just so I know you’re alive and not…

Okay. I promise.

You better not be telling me what I want to hear.

Bug, I promise.

The arrow pierced right into the raccoon as the squeak it made only hurt Y/N. But meat is meat nowadays. As she went to retrieve her arrow and her catch, Daryl couldn’t hold it any longer.

“Why’d yea hide that stuff from me?”

“Because I’m an adult. I’m allowed to have some privacy with my belongings”

“Fine. But you said you stopped smoking. Hell—-You’ve got weed! Where the fuck do you come across that?!”

“That’s none of your damn business!” Y/N snapped at him as she felt the regret, she felt the pain she’s been internalizing—numbing. “I can handle myself, Daryl. I ain’t an addict like Merle. I ain’t gonna go crazy and tear myself apart just because of some marijuana and cigarettes”

“How can you be for certain?”

“Because my brother never coming home does the job” Y/N felt the tears come on as she quickly turned away to try and stop them. Daryl tried to rest his hand on her shoulder but she pulled away. “You ain’t the only one to lose Rick, but why does losing that man mean I have to suffer and never see the only blood I have left”

“Y/N…”

Y/N tensed to the sound of crunching as Daryl quickly readied his crossbow and shot at the sound. One of many squirrels they’d be getting out there. As he passed her to grab his catch, her tears fell.

“When we found the prison, you promised then you’d always be there for me.” Y/N formed fists to contain her anger and slow the tears. “Then Merle died and you were wrecked…so I took on a lot because I couldn’t process my feelings. He was a dirtbag. But he was my brother. It killed a part of me that I wanted an escape that wasn’t harming myself directly. I couldn’t find shit then so I suffered. Then you got kidnapped and I destroyed Carol’s house in Alexandria. I tore off the wallpaper, broke all the dining room chairs, threatened to kill Spencer and broke all the glassware…I thought I had lost you then and I couldn’t escape that old familiar feeling…then the day after Rick died, you left and I cried for days. I lost someone important to me permanently and temporary at the same time. He meant a lot to me too, Daryl. He saved me countless times and I will forever be in the Grimes’ debt. But why did you have to go back on your promise all the fucking time?” She pulled herself away storming off in a sense as Daryl quickly picked up his catch and followed her.

“Y/N—-I was—-“

“Nah. None of that “I was doing this for more than me” crap. Because Michonne would understand if you took breaks and shit. But you never did. Never even bothered to check on me when you did come home…”

“Y/N…”

“I was 15 when this shit started. Now I’m in my 20s and I want the whole fucking world to just burn because of how many times it’s burned me…” Y/N frowns, tripping on an outgrown tree root resulting in Dog quickly sniffing her and Daryl rushing to her side being pushed off of her at first. “Why did you leave me? You’re my big brother and you left me” she sobbed leaning into Daryl as he wrapped himself tightly around her feeling the tears wet his eyes.

“I’m sorry…I didn’t mean to. I didn’t want to…I thought I owed him something. I do owe him my life and just…I’m sorry I stopped trying for yea. I should’ve done better”

Y/N simply continued to sob and latched onto her brother feeling him tighten his hold.

“Please don’t leave me anymore…take me with you or just stay longer”

A few hours passed since then and Y/N found herself on the porch steps with Dog laid by her feet while she took out one of her cigarettes and her lighter. She struggled a bit for the light and it felt like a sign when Daryl handed his zippo to her after stepping out for his own smoke.

“Supporting my bad habits?”

“Nah, joining” Daryl brought himself to sit beside her causing Dog to stir and bring himself to rest his head on his knee. As Daryl starts to pet the pup, Y/N lit her cigarette smoking it a bit before sharing with her brother. “So I have a proposal”

“You leaving again and trying to butter me up with something?”

“Nah. I want yea to come with me.” Daryl stated watching the confusion write itself on her face. “Two sets of eyes are better than one…and Dog”

“…if you have something of Rick, maybe Dog can pick up something” Y/N suggests taking her cigarette back. “We could make camp out there”

“Exactly. Even visit the other communities.” Daryl started, watching her light up slightly and give him a more curious look. “See Carol and Zeke”

Her smile that he’s missed for so long returned from something as simple as seeing old friends. But she was also happy to have her brother back…

[flashfuture]

Since I've been on it I wanna talk about Hal's parents. Cause I've seen some dislike for Geoff Johns take on them. But they didn't really, Jessica especially, exist before then. I feel like some people read the comic where Hal in hysterical grief over Coast City made a construct of his parents and then went off to kill all the Lanterns and Guardians and said yep that is exactly how his parents were.

But let's get into it. Martin and Jessica Jordan. For further context, the sibling order is Jack, Hal, Jim Jordan. Three boys. And it was sort of implied for years that they were Jewish and got confirmed not too long ago that Jessica is Jewish and Martin is Catholic. Hal was a grown man in the 80s. His childhood took place in the 50/60s. And before that he was a grown man in the 60s meaning his childhood was the 40s/50s. That absolutely influenced the type of life he had. Vs the further in time we drag this out the less natural it becomes to have super strict parents.

So to begin the first physical appearance of Martin Jordan comes in 1989 in Green Lantern: Emerald Dawn #1. This is a post crisis pre zero hour story so any events in this particular time window are wildly subject to change

Martin is a test flight pilot. He's Hal's hero. His plane goes down. Hal watches. This sequence of events stays consistent across every time line including Flashpoint which is you know fascinating.

"Hal got fired today-- and he got his mom to call up and beg for him."

"Talk about my father again Biff and I'll rip your lungs out."

In this version of events, we get a mention of Jessica. She's not named and doesn't appear. So you can tell she was brought up purely for a 'Hal is so irresponsible he needs his mommy's help' bit. Hal and Jack get along though and are violently defensive of their father. Hal also catches a drunk driving charge after this.

Speaking of drunk I know there's a comic out there where Martin is described as a drunk which I could not for the life of me dig up again but that's mentioned all of once so I just ignore it. What's with making test pilots drunks???

Anyways Green Lantern: Emerald Dawn is definitely not my favorite Hal Jordan story and I'm glad it's been mostly retconned out minus the very beginning parts with Martin.

(Green Lantern vol 3 #36)

"So you're back to flying planes, huh?"

"Dad's blood still runs through my veins, I guess."

This Christmas special in 1993 took place before Coast City exploded. Hal took Carol out to Jack's house to spend the holiday with the Jordan family. Hal directly attributes flying to his dad's influence.

Now Green Lantern vol 3 #48. Hal is standing in the ruins of Coast City not a soul left and he conjures an image of his parents. Reminder they are entirely Hal's imagination and again he is just about hysterical right now.

"I looked up to you. I worshipped the ground you walked on, or flew over. I wanted to grow up and be you... which probably has a lot to do with who I am now. Growing up, though, I never felt like you... I don't know thought that much of me."

As we saw Hal's dad died when he was Maybe ten. His little brother and older brother didn't have real accomplishments in elementary school. Jack the DA and Jim helping the campaign and having a family that's all modern. Stuff Martin would have never known about. Martin the pilot getting on Hal's case for having his head in the clouds? Really seems like Hal is the one he could have related to the most. Martin getting on Hal about not saving the city just proves Hal is projecting his worries about disappointing his dad onto his dad and then because he's so hysterical with grief forces himself to rewatch his dad dying.

Absolutely completely irrational state of mind he's in right now. At the end of this issue, he's going to fly off into space to kill all the Lanterns and the Guardians.

And then he summons Jessica. Calling her mother instead of mom is just really funny to me like informal with his strict dad formal with his chill mom. Lmao? Jessica only speaks on Martin. Reminding Hal of the good times they had. She's Hal's memory which which means Hal heard the story of dressing up as Santa he remembers his dad's aftershave. Summoning your mom just to talk about your dad is crazy work btw

Again Hal was so young when his dad died. Not a teenager not even close. What was Martin disappointed about? Maybe Hal who can't keep a job a girl or half his friends (Barry died and all super friends ditched him basically) is projecting backwards into time. And assumes his Dad would be disappointed in him.

"Personal gain? This is about personal loss!"

Personal loss and Hal's spent most of his time summoning his long dead father. He really never got over Martin dying and that's so apparent. Anyways this is where Hal decides to go into space and kill everybody. Seeing his dad taken from him one more time made him snap.

Hal is enamored with his father. Whether their relationship was tough or easy it wasn't necessarily the point. The point is Hal Jordan loves his father to Oa and back more than the rest of his family probably understood. He didn't just want to impress his father he wants to be him.

And Zero Hour royally fucked up Hal's family but like idk let's just say Infinite Crisis fixed it. That's two reality shattering events. Why not give Hal a little treat of being his dad's favorite. No one seems to miss when Jack, Jim, and Hal all went to the same college and the same fraternity and were besties

[kittygirl255]

 Code Lyoko is notoriously known for placing its main cast in constant danger. Many jokes have come from the fandom about certain characters being more prone to getting into danger than others. Out of curiosity, I decided to find out exactly which character nearly died the most and what attack was the deadliest. Starting from episode 1 ‘Teddygozilla’ to episode 95 ‘Echoes’ and logging each ‘death’ into a google spreadsheet. To simplify it, I’ve chosen to log the main characters, William, Sissi, and Jim. I also added two additional categories, Background Characters, and Special Mentions. Background Characters refers to characters that don’t have a prominent role in either the episode or series but are still mixed up in one of Xana’s attacks, while Special Mentions refer to characters that hold a prominent or semi-prominent role within the episode but are not important enough to get their own category.

One issue I came across right away was determining just what exactly counted as a ‘near-death.’ For example, in episode 7 ‘Image Problem’ Jeremie is thrown down a hatch connecting the scanner room to the computer’s mainframe. Depending on a combination of factors, from where he lands on the mainframe, to where on his body her lands, to the height he fell from, an argument could be made that he could possibly survive, but with severe injuries. To avoid the headache, I will be treating each case with a ‘live or die’ mindset. For Background Characters, I only counted each death as a singular entity to avoid calculating the estimated number of casualties. To calculate the exact toll would require more time and effort than I am willing to put in. With the perimeters set, allow me to showcase the results.

The season opens with ‘Teddygozilla’ with Ulrich and Aelita getting the first two deaths of the series, with Ulrich nearly being crushed to death, and Aelita almost falling into the digital sea. Jeremie, Odd, Yumi, Sissi, and Jim join the roster in episode 2 when a nuclear power plant nearly explodes. Episode 11 becomes the first episode to have a character almost die twice in the same episode, when Aelita almost falls into the digital sea and is later stabbed by a Krabe, and Odd when he almost falls into the digital sea twice in the same episode. Episode 17 ‘Amnesia’ becomes the first episode of the series to not have a single death. Each episode has an average of 3.2 deaths per episode with episode 11 ‘Plagued’ and Episode 16 ‘Claustrophobia’ tie at 8 deaths each, and episode 17 ‘Amnesia’ and episode 25 ‘Code: Earth’ tie for the least amount at 0 deaths. At the end of season one total count comes to 83 with the personal count ending in the following: Jeremie-8, Aelita-5, Ulrich-13, Yumi-9, Odd-8, Sissi-10, and Jim-10.

Yumi and Ulrich begin season 2 off as the first deaths, nearly dying of heat stroke in the season opener ‘New Order.' Episode 30 ‘A Great Day’ marks the first death at the hands of someone possessed by Xana with Ulrich nearly being bludgeoned to death via a xanafied Sissi. Aelita gets the record for most deaths in a single episode, with episode 37 ‘Common Interest’ where she almost dies three times because of the Supercomputer’s battery almost dying. Season 2 also holds another record for having the most deaths in a single episode at a count of 11 in episode 40 ‘Attack of the Zombies.’ That episode also marks the first death William experiences. Season 2 ends with an average of 1.9 deaths per episode, with episode 40 at 11, and episodes 28, 33, 36, 41, 43, and 48 all tied for least amount at 0. Season 2 has 51 deaths in total with the personal count being the following: Jeremie-4, Aelita-5, Ulrich-6, Yumi-8, Odd-7, William-1, Sissi-2, and Jim-2.

I included the 2 parter prequel ‘Xana Awakens’ as part of season 3 to make formatting easier. The first deaths of the season happen within the opening episode ‘Lyoko Minus One’ with Ulrich and Yumi nearly being electrocuted by their xanafied teachers and classmates, and Aelita and Odd nearly falling into the digital sea. Jeremie has his only near death experience of the season in the prequel ‘Xana Awakens,’ also marking the first canological near death of the series. William almost dies twice in this season, both in episode 59 ‘The Secret’ from drowning and blowing up by a bomb. Unlike the past two seasons, Xana’s focus was mostly on the Lyoko warriors this season, with collateral damage being quite low. This season ends with 27 deaths in total and has an average of 2 deaths per episode. Episode 59 ‘The Secret’ brings us the most deaths at 5, while episodes 53, 57, 60, and 65 each have 0 deaths. At the end of the season the count comes to Jeremie-1, Aelita-4, Ulrich-6, Yumi-5, Odd-5, William-2, Sissi-1, and Jim-1.

Season 4 begins with episode 66 ‘William Returns’ with Yumi nearly falling into the digital sea. Ulrich gets his first death of the series in Episode 69 ‘Wreck Room’ with Sissi from nearly falling off of a roof. Odd comes in, in episode 73 ‘Replika’ falling into the digital sea. Jeremie, Aelita, and Jim come in after a meteor crashes into the earth in episode 75 ‘Hot Shower’. Episode 81 ‘A Lack of Goodwill’ brings the first time the entire team nearly dies in a single episode. The final deaths come in episode 94 ‘Fight to the Finish’, with Yumi and Ulrich nearly killed by a Xanafied William, Franz Hopper sacrificing himself, and Xana from Jeremie’s antivirus program. There are a total of 61 deaths in Season 4, and an average of 2 deaths per episode. Episodes 75 ‘Hot Shower’, and 86 ‘Canine Conundrum’, both tie for most deaths at 9 each. Episodes 70, 71,73,74,78,79,83,85,87,89,92, and 95 all have 0 deaths, leaving all tied for the least deaths in the season. The individual death count for the season comes to the following: Jeremie- 5, Aelita- 8, Ulrich- 7, Yumi- 12, Odd- 6, William- 0, Sissi- 5, and Jim- 3.

By the end of the series, there are a total of 222 deaths in total. The episode with the highest count is episode 40 ‘Attack of the Zombies’ at 11. For the personal count, I will be starting from the lowest to the highest. William is at the bottom with a total of 3, Jim next at 16, then Jeremie and Sissi tie at 18, and Aelita at 23. Odd takes third place at 26. Yumi takes second place with 34 deaths in total. Ulrich claims first place, beating Yumi by 1 with 35 deaths at the end.

In the beginning, I set out to find which character and which episode had the highest ‘death count’. I was thoroughly surprised as the series went on, seeing Ulrich, who I had originally thought to have the lowest count, come out in first place. Discovering the total death count at the end of each season was also fascinating. For example, finding out that season 1 had 83 deaths in total. I was aware the first season was one of the most deadly, but seeing the actual number was surprising. As said, these are not the exact number, it is very possible that I have missed counted, or perhaps there was a judgment I had made that you didn’t agree with. At the end of the day, I did this out of curiosity and for fun, and I can only hope you enjoyed reading my findings as I had collected them.

If you would like to see the full graph here is the link:

https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1jEUk5lypN37hHpK2pzbA95euYr68clNryzQFvgzbVqQ/edit?usp=sharing

[roalinda]

For @prongsfoot-microfic

8. View

Lily was dead and the nursery was still a mess. 

Sirius wanted to put the blame on Voldemort's attack, but that would be nothing but a pathetic excuse for James' tendency to escape the reality and grief. He knew that James felt responsible for the tragedy that had happened, mourning and absolutely mortified, cursing himself for their rendezvous on Halloween night. Guilt was a painful thing, it could be back-breaking and Sirius' heart clenched with sadness. He always hated to see James in pain. 

He took off his boots and entered the nursery with soft steps, looking around to find any sign of change. There was none, minus James who was sitting in the middle of the room, on the blue baby rug, looking lost while trying to gather Harry's shattered toys into a toy box. They were scattered around the room along with a pile of safety cushions which Lily had charmed into soft colorful stags, now only a painful reminder of her death.

"What are you doing here?" James didn't look up but Sirius could tell he was drained. 

"What does it look like?" Sirius' answer was soft. He sat beside James and ran a tender hand through his hair. It was messier than usual. He should brush it for James, later.

"It looks like you don't understand the meaning of privacy. This is where she was killed." replied James, with no real venom in his voice as he leaned into the touch. 

"That's what it looks like to you. To me it looks like you need help with it." shrugged Sirius and James hummed, melting into him. His was mentally exhausted, it was obvious. 

Sirius remained motionless for a long time, listening to James' heartbeat. It was calming, reassuring Sirius that his lover was alive and well, although mourning. 

"I know it is hard, love. I know you blame yourself, but you need to be strong." the words were cliched but they were the truth. "I will help you to carry the burden, don't worry." 

"Sirius, did I make a mistake by marrying her? She could be alive," James looked down at his chewed nails. He hadn't been successful in quitting his childhood habit. Whenever he was overwhelmed, he chewed on his nails relentlessly.

Sirius remained silent and James pursed his lips. "Lily knew that you were the only one I was in love with…but I was selfish…I hurt her…and you as well. Now look at me…a dead wife, a motherless child and shattering guilt are all I have."

Sirius took a deep breath. The rarity of the situation was a delicate matter to handle. Insecurity was not a part of James' character, so dealing with it was hard. It required Sirius' brutal honesty because unlike the most James didn't need flowery language to be assured, he needed the truth, no matter how harsh. It would help James' toxic feelings to explode out of him. 

"This is war, James. Yesterday was Lily, tomorrow might be me." said Sirius and waited for the wrathful outburst that was about to come. 

His eyes went wide as James suddenly pushed him to the ground and leaped on his chest, his breaths laboured and eyes wild behind the glasses. He grabbed Sirius by collar harshly, expression darkening with unhinged rage. "Shut up, Black. Shut up. Shut up or I will throttle you with my bare hands to shut you up." 

Sirius blinked at him in shock, lying motionlessly there, waiting for the storm to pass. James' pupils were dilated and his teeth were bared, like a caged animal whose mate was going to be taken away from him. Sirius had never witnessed such derangement in his lover, so terrifying yet beautiful. It was quite a view. 

"Shut up…shut up…shut the fuck up…" James was openly crying now, hitting Sirius softly on the chest with his fists. "do you want me to go insane?" 

"Come here, deer." was all Sirius whispered, the old endearment term somehow comforting his lover. James snuggled up on his chest, shaking with silent sobs. Sirius didn't blame him. This was the first time he had cried since Lily's funeral. 

"Promise me you won't die?"

The childish request hurt Sirius since both of them knew that it was impossible.

"I won't. Not as long as I have you here to welcome me." he whispered and James sighed in contentment although he knew this was nothing but an already broken vow. 

But for now it was enough. 

[heydorothea009]

Bread on Toast - A Future Man Fanfiction

Josh Futturman and his fellow coworker and best friend, Liv Branson, get roped into saving the world as time traveling saviors with, what were thought to be, video game characters, Wolf and Tiger. Not only are Liv and Josh completely incompetent, but they are also emotionally inept- will this cause the destruction of mankind? Only time will tell.

Warnings: strong language, mentions of Wolf getting a blowjob (not really?? I just feel like I should add that), an exploding head (guess who’s)

Chapter 5: A Blowjob Before Dying

Tiger ended up in the driver's seat this time, driving like a maniac out of the parking lot.

“Liv! Play some tunes again!” Wolf yelled excitedly up to Liv in the passenger seat. Him and Josh were in the back with the dead Biotics and Jeri, who was still unconscious. Josh was clinging onto one of the shelves in the back for food transportation for dear life.

“Um, I don’t think-“

“Do it!” Wolf yelled, throwing a tray back and hitting a dead Biotic in the head. He laughed maniacally.

Liv hooked her phone up to the aux and pressed play for Wolf. She didn’t want him to hit her in the head with a tray, he was in a scary mood. The playlist had a funny sense of humor, making sure the song “(You’re The) Devil in Disguise” by Elvis played first. Liv tensed.

You look like an angel (look like an angel)

Walk like an angel (walk like an angel)

Talk like an angel

But I got wise

You’re the devil in disguise

Liv slowly turned her head around to look at Josh, who raised his eyes to look at her.

“…please skip this song.” He muttered. Liv did and “You Spin Me Round” by Dead Or Alive came on instead. Wolf was really feeling the music in the back, while Josh looked like he wanted to die. Liv felt like she was going to die from Tiger’s driving.

“We are almost to base, repeat, almost to base!” Tiger yelled, speeding through a red light.

“Fuck yeah!” Wolf cheered.

“This is just like our escape from the slave mines of Ganderloo!” Tiger made a sharp left, sending Josh into the shelf across from the one he was clinging onto.

“Minus the hollandaise.” Wolf said, dipping his finger into a sauce he’d found back there.

“How are you guys actually having so much fun right now?! That was traumatizing!” Josh snapped, almost falling backwards as Tiger hit a curb.

“Buck up soldier! We’ve got a Biotic to interrogate!” Wolf kicked Jeri’s foot to see if she’d wake up, but she stayed passed out.

“This is going to be a rush job, gamma protocol.” Tiger said up in the front.

“Oh, it’s gonna be gamma, her little head’s gonna blow in…” Wolf checked his timer. “26 minutes!”

“26 minutes?! This wasn't the plan!” Josh groaned and ran a hand over his jaw.

“Well, this is the plan now.” Tiger said, snatching Liv’s phone from her hands and disconnecting the aux cord. “I’m sick of this music.”

“Are you even 100% sure she’s a Biotic?” Josh said, still in denial.

“Fuck you Resistance scum!” Jeri shouted, waking up. Wolf immediately pummeled her in the face with a metal tray.

“Easy macho man!” Josh cried. “She’s my…” he trailed off.

“She’s a Biotic, Josh!” Liv reminded him as she turned around in her seat to look at him.

“Yes! And! We need to find out where Robo-snatch is keeping her time machine, remember?” Tiger took another sharp turn. “And getting it out of her,” she smiled evilly. “Ain't gonna be pretty.”

“I have so many torture devices set up in the sewer.” Wolf announced proudly. “There is literally no scenario that I can’t torture for.” A fearful look washed over Josh’s face.

“Although, Cunt-o here is going to have to be alert for this to work.” Tiger said.

“Waking her up will be the fun part.” Wolf laughed maniacally, ripping off of his bloody sleeves. Josh looked white as a ghost and Liv was trying to tighten her seatbelt as much as possible. In record time they made it back. They came to an abrupt stop in front of Josh’s house, sending Josh crashing into Liv’s seat.

The four of them hurried out of the car and Wolf scooped up a still passed out Jeri. “Go, go, go,” Josh whispered urgently, grabbing everything they needed from the car.

“Are you kids home already?” It was Gabe. They all froze. Liv quickly threw Tiger’s shawl over the shoe lodged in Jeri’s neck. “Ooh! And you brought a friend too!”

Josh quickly ran over to his dad to stop him from getting too close. “Um! Yeah! This is just a friend from work who has a little too much to drink.” He explained as casually as he could.

“Hey, nobody's ever died from having a good time, right?” Gabe laughed.

“People die from that all the time, dad.” Josh said.

“It’s just a saying, come on in, guys!” Gabe motioned for them to come inside.

Josh quietly walked back over to Wolf, Tiger, and Liv. “Look guys, my dad is cool and all, but if he sees us taking an unconscious woman into a subterranean torture chamber he will call the cops.” He whispered.

Tiger and Wolf both murmured as they carried Jeri up to Josh’s house. Liv caught up to Josh’s pace. “Hey, are you doing okay?” She asked.

“No.” Josh sighed, walking through the front door, which his dad had left open.

“What a nice surprise!” Diane exclaimed as they entered. Josh’s face went pale as he realized his parents were throwing a Christmas party he’d completely forgotten about. “Oh! Who’s this- is she passed out?” Diane asked about Jeri.

“Uh, yeah, she’s just our friend,” Josh gestured between him and Liv. “Jeri. From work.”

“Jeri? Not the Jeri from work who you used -“

“No!” Josh interrupted quickly. “Nope, wrong person. So! We’re just gonna go on up-“

“Well wait, wait! Introductions!” Diane stopped them, motioning for their guests to come over and say hi.

Josh turned to Liv and muttered, “We don’t have time for this.” Under his breath.

“Corey, Tiger, this is Josh’s Uncle Barry, Uncle Barry, you already know Liv.” Uncle Barry gave them a small wave. “This is my dear friend Wanda who we brought to meet Barry.”

Wanda’s eyes slid up and down Wolf, who cocked an eyebrow and glanced at Tiger. “Oh, so this is the famous Corey Wolfhart in the flesh.” She said, giving him a flirty wave.

“And these are our neighbors, Julius and Melinda Seneca.” Gabe gestured to the neighbors.

Josh mumbled hellos to them. “Nice baby,” Tiger said to Melinda, who was holding their infant son. Liv and Josh exchanged worried glances.

“Oh, thank you! This is Wallace.” Melinda said, stepping closer so that Tiger could see Wallace. Josh stiffened, not trusting Tiger around baby Wallace.

Wolf was interested too, and stepped closer, Jeri dragging with him. “Nice legs. A lot of meat on those haunches, you ever think about eating those?” Wolf asked genuinely, giving Wallace’s legs a little pinch. There was an awkward pause.

“Haha!” Liv fake laughed, getting everyone to laugh. “Corey, you’re so funny!” She said, nudging him up the stairs.

“We’d better, um, we’ve got to…yeah…” Josh said, backing up the stairs as Tiger followed him.

“Nice meeting everyone.” She said in a flat voice. Wolf busted into Josh’s room with Jeri in tow and Liv right behind him. Josh and Tiger followed.

“Okay Wolf, get her out that window and we’ll take her to the sewer.” Tiger said. Wolf dropped Jeri on her face and quickly threw the window open.

“What? No, we don’t have time! Don’t we only have like 20 minutes?” Josh asked.

Wolf checked his timer. “24.”

“Right…new plan: torture her here.” Tiger said, grabbing a chair and setting it in the middle of the room.

“What a waste! I had electric currents and scalpels,” Wolf complained like a toddler as he picked Jeri up like a rag doll and sat her in the chair. “I found this really cool scorpion,”

“Hey,” Tiger snapped her fingers at him. “Torture comes from here.” She said, pointing at her heart.

“Oh God,” Josh groaned. “Guys, if she knows she's gonna die, maybe pain isn’t the way to go.”

Wolf peeked his head around the chair as he tied Jeri’s hands. “Pain is always the way to go.”

“Yeah, on someone who doesn’t want to die. Maybe we should just try talking to her. And, there’s a house full of people, I dunno how we’re gonna muffle her screams.” Josh said, pointing to his door.

“Well, yeah, when fingernails start getting ripped off I don’t know how you keep that quiet.” Tiger said as she tied Jeri’s legs.

A little knock was heard at Josh’s door. “Joshy?” Diane. Josh moved past Liv.

“Jesus Christ,” he murmured as he slipped out of the door to talk to his mom.

Liv nervously shifted her feet as she watched Tiger and Wolf tie up Jeri. “So…she’s going to explode? In here?”

“Yep.” Tiger said.

“There’s no way of stopping that?”

“Nope.” Wolf said, walking around Jeri with the rope, tying it around her torso.

“Do I have to be here to see that, or…?” Liv asked nervously as Tiger’s head shot up to glare at her.

“You don’t have to be in here. You don’t have to be here at all.” She snapped in a hushed voice. Wolf stopped and glared at her.

“Hey! Leave her alone.” He defended Liv.

Liv frowned as Josh opened the door and stuck his head inside. “Guys,” he whispered and motioned for them to come out of his room. They all squeezed through the door, trying not to open it too wide, and into the hall. “Okay guys, my parents are not going to leave us alone tonight.” Josh whispered.

“We’ll need personnel downstairs,” Tiger whispered, nodding. “Cockblocking.”

“What?” Liv raised an eyebrow.

“No, Tiger, that’s not even remotely close to what that means.” Josh whispered.

“Wolf, you’re gonna do this one thing or you’re useless. You’re gonna go down stairs and join this feast honoring this ‘Santa Claus’. Run a civilian blockade.” Tiger hissed.

“Social duty? What, am I Butterfly now?”

“Hey. Butterfly could talk to anyone about anything. Lit up the goddamn world with that smile.” Tiger whispered through gritted teeth.

“Fine. Fine! I’ll go and join the party with the drinking and the merrymaking, and I’ll pretend to have fun. But I won’t like it!” Wolf said, whipping around and beginning to walk down the stairs.

“Wolf, time.” Tiger said. Wolf pulled out his timer.

“Gamma protocol, 21 minutes.”

Josh pulled out his phone and said, “Lamar, set a timer for 21 minutes.”

“Done. Stay cool, man.” Josh’s phone said as he put it in his pocket.

“Liv, would you…” he gestured his head towards the stairs as Wolf made his way down to the party. Liv nodded and hurried down the stairs after Wolf. Wolf and Liv quietly joined the party as the topic of conversation were the DNA tests that the Senecas had just taken.

“It’s like, you spit in a bottle, mail it away, and boom! Bob’s your uncle. You find out Bob’s your uncle!” Julius Seneca explained, making everyone chuckle.

“Hahahahaha!” Wolf fake laughed loudly. “Humor.” Liv smiled awkwardly and pat Wolf on the shoulder.

“We have an Uncle Bob,” Uncle Barry announced. “He’s sick. It’s terminal.” Everyone’s faces fell slightly as the room got awkwardly quiet.

“Um, Corey, Liv, would you like some port?” Diane asked, breaking the silence and offering two small glasses of port. Liv was about to accept when she remembered she probably shouldn’t drink tonight.

“I’m okay.” Liv said. Wolf accepted his glass.

“It looks like blood…” he said before tentatively sipping it. “Tastes like honey!” He observed as his eyes lit up. Liv took the glass from his hand and gave him a smile.

“Don’t drink.” She hissed through her teeth as the chatter picked back up between the guests.

“Cor, would you come in here?” Gabe called from the kitchen. Wolf looked at Liv and she shrugged.

“Go see what he needs, I’ll go check on our Biotic.” She whispered. Wolf walked into the kitchen and Liv snuck upstairs, hoping Diane didn’t notice. She slipped into Josh’s room to find Tiger standing in front of a now awake Jeri with her hands on her hips and Josh throwing sheets around things in his room.

“Tell us where your TTD is, bitch face.” Tiger insulted Jeri.

“No.” Jeri stated. “Oh, Liv,” Jeri sighed upon seeing her. “Not you too.” Liv glared at her.

“Hey!” Tiger snapped her fingers in Jeri’s face. “Is it in one of your habitation units?”

“You mean apartments where we live like normal people and not sewer dwelling animals?” Jeri asked like a smart ass.

“Hey! I’m doing the insulting here!” Tiger lashed.

“‘Scuse me, Liv,” Josh muttered, moving past her to cover his TV with a sheet.

“Hey! Would you stop doing that? Really distracting!” Tiger snapped at Josh. She turned her head to Liv. “Where’s Wolf?” She asked sternly.

“With Gabe.” Liv answered.

“I’ve got a lot of valuables I’m trying to protect.” Josh answered at the same time, defensively.

“Thank you, Liv.” Tiger said to Liv. “And you,” she pointed at Josh. “Will need a lot more sheets.”

“She’s right.” Jeri stated. “My head is going to explode and it will alert a kill team that will descend upon your house and take you out once and for all.”

Tiger narrowed her eyes at her and leaned down to Jeri’s level. “Well I’ve got 68 deactivated brain bombs in my gobulator that say otherwise. And that’s just my travel sized gobulator.”

Jeri narrowed her eyes back. “Sooner or later luck will run out, Tiger. It sure did in the tunnel.” Josh paused as Jeri said this, looking at Tiger with a worried expression. Tiger balled her hands into fists. “What was it, 43 of them? Your team put their lives in your hands, and look where that got them-“ Jeri was cut off by Tiger punching her across the face.

“Hey!” Josh’s eyes bugged out of his head. “Come on, we said no rough stuff!”

“That's all she knows, she’s a savage.” Jeri said coldly. “I don’t know how she recruited people as decent as you guys, but it’s all a lie.”

“You’re the lie, you’re the fucking Biotic.” Liv spat.

“There are no Biotics. That’s just a name her crazy overlords came up with to make us seem like the bad guys.” Jeri said.

“You are the bad guys!” Tiger yelled. “You gassed my fucking cave!”

“The Resistance is a terrorist organization that will kill us by any means necessary!” Jeri said.

“Oh okay,” Tiger rolled her eyes.

Josh glanced at Liv and then back at Jeri. “Bullshit.” He mumbled.

“Is it?” Jeri asked, looking up at him with pleading eyes. Liv’s blood boiled. She was trying to manipulate him. She saw Josh’s expression change, starting to question. “What do you really know about Tiger and this so-called Resistance?”

“A lot. The game had a very detailed backstory.” Josh said.

“Yeah, story. Let me lay some truth on you. I was born and raised in Montclair, New Jersey, my parents are kind of lax Christians, my brother is an out and proud gay man and professional robosurfer. It’s a thing, it’s cool. There’s no crime, pollution and population are under control, humanity has been perfected. It’s utopia, save for these nut jobs who are trying to tear it all down.” Jeri explained.

“Utopia? Really?” Tiger scoffed. “Is utopia forcing everyone to get a cure? Shoving needles up our butts?”

“Arm!” Jeri corrected her and rolled her eyes. She looked up between Liv and Josh. “The needle goes in your arm.”

“Creating monsters?” Tiger continued. “Hunting down and killing anyone who doesn’t comply?”

“We only started hunting you down because you started blowing up our hospitals.” Jeri glared at Tiger. Liv shook her head, looking at Tiger and praying that wasn’t true.

“Hospitals?!” Josh exclaimed.

Tiger shook her head. “She means super cute injection sites.”

“No. I mean hospitals. Doctors, patients who simply just need their tonsils out.” Jeri looked up at Josh with those sad puppy dog eyes again. “Look at me? Do I look like a monster to you?”

Liv immediately picked up on Jeri’s little game and nudged Josh’s arm as she saw him start to fold again. Josh looked at Liv with panicked eyes and she shook her head. “I-I don’t know! I’m really confused right now.”

“Don’t listen to her, she’s programmed to deceive.” Tiger spoke up. “We don’t have time for this bullshit!”

“Hey, it’s not her fault, she’s been brainwashed her whole life.” Jeri said softly.

“I-I mean the gaps in their knowledge is astonishing.” Josh admitted.

“Yeah, that’s because they live in the sewers and call books burn bricks.” Jeri said, eyeing Tiger.

“Can’t you see she’s pulling a Badger? Turning tables, creating doubt and being very annoying?” Tiger asked Josh. Liv didn’t know what she meant, but that’s exactly what was happening, but Josh seemed to be slowly falling for it, and that worried her.

“He wasn’t saying very nice things about you an hour ago.” Jeri said to Tiger. “‘She’s used me’. ‘She’s endangered my life’. ‘With any luck she’ll be gone gone soon, like really, really far away forever.’” Jeri directly quoted Josh. Josh gave her a disturbed look. “We have perfect memories.”

Tiger folded her arms. “What are you talking about? You don’t even know each other.”

“Is that what he told you?” Jeri said quietly.

“I mean, I don’t really know you.” Josh shrugged.

“Oh yeah? Like when we kissed? Didn’t it feel kinda like we knew each other then?” Jeri asked. Liv drew in a shaky breath through her nose. She wanted to snap Jeri’s neck. Jeri’s eyes fixated on Liv, noticing the way she tensed and the way her eyebrow twitched.

Josh glanced at Liv who looked like she was about to explode and Tiger who looked disgusted. “In all fairness, I didn’t know she was a Biotic when I was kissing her.”

Tiger gagged. “You rat holed to rat holed her? …Well…I’m gonna puke.” She drew in a sharp breath. “I’m done doing this the nice way. You,” she pointed aggressively at Jeri. “Are getting a scorpion up your snatch.” She started to storm out of the room.

“Woah, Tiger, isn’t there some kind of middle ground there?” Josh asked with wide eyes.

“Nope, scorp in the snatch.” Tiger said, exiting the room. Josh looked at Liv.

“Give me a sec. Stay here and watch her.” He muttered to her as he followed Tiger out of the room. As soon as the door closed, Jeri spoke.

“You like him.”

Liv whipped her head around and scoffed. “What?”

“Josh. You like him.”

“And he liked you. A lot. And now you’re breaking his heart.” Liv snapped.

“Is that why you don’t believe me? Is it because you want a reason to hate me? Is it because I kissed Josh that you refuse to listen to me?” Jeri asked.

“It’s because you called me your fucking friend and then stabbed us in the back, Jeri.” Liv cried. “If you weren’t a fucking Biotic, I would have stepped back and let you and Josh kiss and date and all that shit. Would it have made me happy? No! But Josh is my best friend and I love him. I want what’s best for him, and I don’t appreciate you trying to give him these sad puppy dog eyes that confuse him! I don’t believe you because I can see through your sad little eyes and see that you’re a perf!”

“They’re getting to you.” Jeri said simply.

“Did you ever really like him? Or were you just stringing him along?” Liv asked, body trembling with adrenaline.

“Liv-“

“Answer my question.” Liv demanded. Jeri looked shocked. “You asked if there was anything romantic between us. You acted like you liked him. Did you ever actually?”

Jeri sighed. “How could you not like Josh? He wasn’t supposed to get wrapped in all this, and neither were you. Especially not you.”

Liv leaned down and got in Jeri’s face. “Do you realize how badly you’re breaking his heart right now?”

“Why does it matter to you, you can be the shoulder he cries on.”

“No! Okay? I don’t want to risk the friendship we have just because I have feelings for him. And I don’t want to make it a whole thing, this isn’t high school.” Liv had to walk away from Jeri. “I really thought we were friends.”

“Liv, we were! We are!”

“No. Not anymore.”

Josh came back, grumbling.

“Where’s Tiger?”

“I dunno, but she threatened to ‘neuter me’ if I kept following her.” Josh mumbled. “Will you go downstairs and be with Wolf?” He asked her quietly. Liv sighed and nodded. She shot Jeri a glare and left the room.

“None of this makes sense.” Josh groaned as he ran his hands down his face.

“I know, it’s a lot to process.” Jeri said.

“I really, really thought you liked me.” Josh said.

“Oh…that? Sorry, uh,” Jeri was thrown off.

“What, so none of it was real?” Josh asked. Jeri furrowed her brows realizing her and Liv had just had this exact conversation.

“Josh, I was sent to protect the man who saves humanity from itself. I’m a soldier.”

“Okay, but when we kissed, you didn’t feel anything?” Josh asked.

“I was trying to decide if I thought an attack was imminent.”

“…So your eyes were open and shit?!” Josh cried.

“Yes Josh, my eyes were open and shit!” Jeri said. “Josh, in case you haven’t noticed, there’s something much bigger going on here. Everyone in this house is in danger.”

“I just…really liked you. And I thought you liked me.” Josh said sadly, slumping down into a chair. “We were really vibing in the file room.”

Jeri rolled her eyes. “Seriously? We’re still on this? Talking about our feelings? God, you and Liv.” She gave an exasperated sigh. Josh didn’t think much about what she’d said.

“Why would you like my instagram posts if you didn’t even like me?” He was still going off.

Outside, Liv was making her way down the stairs when Tiger almost bowled her over holding a jar with scorpion and Baby Wallace’s baby carrier.

“Tiger!” Liv looked at the baby carrier. “Josh told me not to trust you with babies because he had to teach you about kidnapping.”

“I’m gonna tell Shoe Neck up there that this is Kronish.” Tiger said in a hushed tone. “I’m gonna tell her if she doesn’t give us the location of her TTD that I’m gonna blow the kid up.”

“TIGER!”

“I won’t really.” Tiger rolled her eyes. “Do you seriously think I would kill a baby?”

Liv stared at her. “Yes?!”

Tiger realized what she’d said and slowly nodded in agreement. “I…don’t know why I said that. Let’s go, Shoe Neck needs to fucking talk and I think this might get it outta her.” Tiger brushed past Liv and continued up the stairs. “Come on, Liv.”

“Josh told me to go check on Wolf-“

“He’s with Gabe and Diane, he’s fine,” Tiger looked down over her shoulder with a sinister grin. “You’re gonna wanna see this, it’s gonna be fuckin’ awesome.” Liv followed Tiger back up the stairs and into Josh’s room.

“I’ve got a nice surprise for you, Jeri.” Tiger said, setting the baby carrier in front of her. “See him? That’s little baby Kronish.” Jeri blinked at her in disbelief. Josh made the same face. “If you don’t start talking, he’s about to go kablooey.” Tiger grabbed the biggest fucking gun Liv had ever seen in real life.

“Tiger.” Josh was trying his best to stay calm. “I don’t like where this is going.” Liv tried to discreetly and telepathically tell him Tiger wasn’t actually going to do it, but he wasn’t looking at her.

“You’re bluffing.” Jeri said, an edge of worry was in her voice. “Your TTD is broken, why else would you be asking so many questions about ours?”

“Maybe.” Tiger kept a straight face. “Maybe not. But, you know, when I fuck your future straight up the ass, you’ll be so glad that you held out.”

“Tiger, I really don’t like this.” Josh said again. Liv stared at him harder.

“You’re telling me that you went back to the 40s to kidnap Kronish as a baby and you brought him back here to prove it to me? That’s crazy.” Jeri shook her head.

“Is it? What do you know about time travel? Multiverses, alternate realities, time loops?” Liv realized that Tiger was quoting her from the other day.

“Uh, everything? That’s like the first knowledge pill they put in our womb fluid.” Jeri scoffed.

“Well, pod scum,” Tiger loaded the gun while making unwavering eye contact with Jeri. “Then you know that all of this makes to fucking sense and that there is absolutely no logic to it. So, it’s entirely possible that he is Elias Kronish. And you know what happens if I pull the trigger.”

“I wouldn’t put it past you to kill a baby.” Jeri never broke eye contact with Tiger.

“Tiger! You’re freaking me out!” Josh was starting to lose it. Liv discreetly shook her head at him.

“You should be freaked out.” Jeri said calmly. “She doesn’t have a family. She doesn’t have connections to anything or anyone.”

Tiger’s jaw clenched. “Give me the whereabouts of your TTD, or little Kronish here will get blown up.” Tiger started up the weapon as she aimed it at Wallace. Tiger was taking it too far, Liv didn’t know what to do. She heard the gun warm up to send a blast right into the baby. “We won’t be stranded here.”

Josh threw his body down in front of the baby carrier. “Tiger, stop! This isn’t Kronish, it’s- it’s baby Wallace, the neighbor’s baby. He’s innocent, he’s innocent!”

Just then, a very drunk Uncle Barry came barging into the room. He looked around to see Jeri tied up with a shoe in her neck, Josh defensively laying in front of little baby Wallace who was cooing and kicking his feet, Tiger aiming a giant ass gun at baby Wallace, and Liv standing next to the door with giant eyes, slowly putting her hand over her mouth.

“Well,” Barry just looked around. “Seems like everyone is having fun but old Uncle Barry.”

Liv, Josh, and Tiger all slowly made eye contact. “Out.” Josh demanded. Liv led Barry by the elbow out of the room while Josh scooped up baby Wallace and Tiger set down her gun and picked up the baby carrier with an angry sigh. Tiger spun around and gave Jeri the “I’m watching you” motion as she walked out of the room.

Uncle Barry stayed behind the three as he stared at the pictures on the walls. Josh lightly rocked baby Wallace as he glared at Tiger. “You took it too far, Tiger.”

“I’m just getting started Josh.” Tiger glared back at him.

“Tiger, I had to explain to you what a baby was four days ago. You clearly don’t understand how important he is to his parents and how fragile he is.” He turned to Liv. “Can you take him?”

As Liv took Wallace from Josh’s arms she thought, Woah, this is so domestic of us. She caught herself and stared straight ahead as her cheeks got hot. It was not the time nor the place to be thinking about that. She glanced over at Josh as him and Tiger argued. The way he’d rolled his dress shirt sleeves up to his elbows and the way he’d been holding baby Wallace- she tore her eyes away and blinked a couple times. Oh fuck.

“Liv.” Josh repeated himself. “Hello?” He sounded frustrated.

“Sorry…what?”

“Take Wallace downstairs to his parents please. I’m going to have a go at Jeri.”

“Okay. Are you sure you want to do that?”

“We’ve got 6 minutes, I think I know how to get it out of her.” Josh took a deep breath nervously. Tiger sensed a sentimental moment was incoming and gave an annoyed huff, pushing past both of them to drag Barry downstairs.

“That used to be my room. Nothing like that happened when I lived there.” Barry said to Tiger as she pulled him downstairs. She gave him a famous Tiger eye roll.

“Josh,” Liv said as she laid Wallace in his baby carrier, sensing his anxiousness. “You don’t have to do it alone. I can be in there with you.”

“Thank you Liv, but I have a plan. And I know you’re squeamish, I don’t want you to see her head explode.” God, he was so sweet. He saw her face soften and pulled her into a hug. Liv hugged him back tightly.

“Good luck.” She whispered. She knew this would be hard for him, but she picked up the baby carrier and he gave her a small smile before disappearing into his room. Liv carried Wallace down the stairs and into the kitchen, being greeted by Tiger’s voice.

“So, so you’ve found family members through this…tracking system?” Tiger asked, trying to mask her interest in whatever they were talking about.

“Yes!” Melinda Seneca said, handing Tiger a DNA test box that her husband was talking about earlier. She saw Liv with Wallace and gave her a questioning look.

“I, uh, heard him start to get fussy and thought I might bring him out here.” Liv said. Melinda gave her a thankful smile as she took the carrier from Liv.

“Corey! You’re back!” Diane greeted Wolf as he appeared back into the kitchen with a dazed smile.

“Have you guys ever had one of these blowjob things?” Wolf asked, creating awkward silence throughout the kitchen. Liv couldn’t fake laugh her way out of this one. Tiger looked confused and frustrated with Wolf while Liv looked over at him and refrained from screaming. Barry took a giant swig from a wine bottle.

Wanda waltzed back into the kitchen after Wolf. “What did I miss?”

“Oh! I was just telling them about what you were just doing to my penis in the bathroom!” Wolf said happily. Tiger’s face quickly turned into a mix of disturbed, disgusted, and pissed.

Wanda looked surprised about Wolf’s transparency. “Oh!” She looked at Gabe and Diane who both looked uncomfortable and shocked. “You’re gonna wanna wash those hand towels.”

Tiger looked about ready to kill Wolf. “Melinda! Can you please explain these DNA kits to me? I missed it and was thinking about doing one!” Liv asked loudly, trying to distract everyone in some way.

Meanwhile upstairs, Josh was sitting across from Jeri.

“You’re a good man Josh, there’s still time to-“

“Joshy?” Diane knocked on his door again.

Josh tensed and jumped to his feet. “Jesus fucking Christ, mom, I’m gonna kill you!” He stormed to his door and squeezed his way through, wondering why Liv hadn’t stopped her (Liv was downstairs realizing she’d opened a can of worms by asking Melinda to explain the DNA tests to her and hadn’t seen Diane leave). “You need to give me space, okay? I’m not a baby.”

“Well, I know-“

“And I don’t need your check ups or your sweets.” Josh said, referring to the plate of danishes Diane had brought with her.

“It’s just you’ve been up here the whole time and everyone else is downstairs.” Diane said sweetly.

“Mom…I have been up here for 18 minutes and 30 seconds tops and I don’t care what everyone else is doing. Please. Leave me alone.” He gave an exasperated sigh as he squeezed back through his door and into his room, leaving Diane confused.

“Oh my God,” Jeri commented. “You should give her a break.”

“Give me a break Jeri, okay?” Josh waved his hand as if to brush her comment off.

“They’re changing you.” Jeri said. “Did you talk to your mother like that a week ago? Is this who you’re becoming?” Josh closed his eyes and buried his face in his hands. He was changing. “You can still walk away from all of this.”

Josh sighed. “…I just jumped right in with two feet. It felt so good to be a part of something.”

“And you still can be.” Jeri said, looking at him encouragingly.

Josh squeezed his eyes shut. “Alright. Tell me what to do.”

“Hm?”

“I want out.” Josh said. “I want out and I want to get Liv out too.”

Jeri breathed out a sigh of relief. “You’re doing the right thing.”

Josh squeezed his eyes shut again. “Then why do I feel so shitty?”

“Being the hero doesn’t always feel heroic?” Jeri shrugged.

Josh scoffed. “Yeah. Sounds like the tagline to my life. Meet Josh Futturman! He doesn’t get the girl and he betrays his friends! Sometimes it takes a loser to win!” Josh said in a mock announcer voice.

“If it helps, I couldn’t give Tiger what she wanted anyways. We don’t even have time machines.” Jeri admitted.

Josh raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean? How’d you get here then?”

“We…jump in. It’s a one way ticket. I mean, do you have any idea how risky it is to bring future tech into the past?”

Josh sat on his bed. “Duh, time travel 101…so without any Cameronium they’re stuck here no matter what?”

“Considering that Cameronium isn’t a thing for another 6 years, then, yeah.” Jeri said.

“What happens in 6 years?”

Jeri grinned and sang a tune that sounded like something she’s learned in school. “In 2023 James Cameron dove beneath the sea…”

Josh was shocked. “James Cameron? Like the director James Cameron?!”

“Sir James Cameron, father of modern science.” Jeri grinned even wider at Josh’s excited reaction.

“Shut up!” Josh said, growing more and more shocked. “Cameronium is named after James Cameron?!” Jeri nodded. “Is it ‘cause he’s got, like, a hard on for cool underwater shit?”

“In 2023, James Cameron pilots a submersible to the deepest depths of the sea and discovers a phosphorescent microorganism he thinks looks cool. It sits in his home lab for about 10 years before anyone knows what it is, and…yeah…” Jeri explained.

“Of course, Cameronium.” Josh got up and paced around. “So…you’ve been stuck here waiting for shit to go down for three years being Stu’s assistant?” He took a seat again, this time on a chair he’d covered in bed sheets.

“Yeah,” Jeri chuckled. “Pretty crazy, huh? The things you do for the cause.”

Josh laid in the chair, swinging his legs over the armrest. “Like what? Pretending to like me?”

“You know what? That part wasn’t that hard.” Jeri said. Josh blushed and looked away from her, staring up at the ceiling.

“I mean, every guy I’ve ever been attracted to has been perfect, like genetically and intellectually. They’re basically flawless…and then I met you.” She said, looking at him with a sweet smile. Josh turned his head to look at her again.

“…okay…”

“No, no! And I liked it! You’re- you’re just so different, you’re so flawed but funny, and genuine.” A small smile spread over Josh’s lips as she talked. “I had butterflies in my stomach before we kissed! I thought those had been engineered out of me! …And I did it because I really wanted to. Not because I had to.”

Josh grinned at her. “I knew it. I knew you liked me.”

Jeri laughed lightly and shrugged. “I mean, I would have made it more obvious earlier, but, I dunno, you were always hanging around Liv and-“

Josh laughed. “Yeah, people always seem to think there’s something between us-“

“That’s probably because she likes you.”

Josh’s laughter caught in his throat. He blinked, brain malfunctioning. “…what?”

Jeri shrugged again, chuckling lightly. “Oh, I thought you knew. It’s pretty obvious. I honestly thought you guys were dating, or like, friends with benefits until yesterday because I asked her. And today she wouldn’t stop talking about how I was breaking your heart and I should-“

Josh blinked a couple more times, taking in what he’d just heard. “She told you she liked me?”

Jeri shook her head. “Actually, I told her she liked you. And she started yelling at me- you know, I’ve never heard her yell. She’s such a sweetheart, I didn’t think she had it in her. She and I really got along, I really liked being her friend and I’m really gonna miss-“

Josh slowly rose to his feet as she rambled, realizing he only had about a minute and a half left before she exploded. He shook his head, not letting what Jeri said get to him.

“You know what Jeri, I’m glad you didn’t initiate anything sooner.” Josh interrupted her. “It allowed me to play the sad-sack, wounded little bird who you’d tell everything to.” Jeri’s face fell. “You were so caught up in my feelings Jer, you kinda let your guard down. We do have a TTD. And we’re not out of Cameronium. You just told me when, where, and how to get more. As fucked up as Tiger and Wolf are, they never lied to me and Liv about who they are. And your little pod person society? Well, that’s just fuckin’ scary.” Jeri swore under her breath as he said this. “I also don’t appreciate you trying to get in my head like that, Liv is just my friend.” Josh narrowed his eyes at her and leaned down to her level. “We’re fighting for their future, not yours. So why don’t you contemplate that for the next thirty se-“

Hot blood splattered all over Josh’s face and the bed sheets he’d used to cover his room as Jeri’s head exploded. Josh squeezed his eyes shut, feeling like he got sprayed in the face by a hose spraying hot water. He opened his eyes wide with horror as he looked at the headless body that sat in front of him.

“Okay,” Liv squeezed back into the room with Tiger following her. “We need to- OH MY GOD.” Josh slowly turned around, shell shocked.

“Oh, would you look at that?” Tiger looked around the room calmly. “Did you get everything we needed?” Josh slowly nodded. Liv looked like she was about to vomit. Tiger smirked. “Guess she won’t be playing any head games with us anytime soon.” Liv shook her head as Josh just looked traumatized. “…okay, too soon.”

“This is Lamar Price saying, your time is up Josh Futter-man.” Josh’s timer went off.

“What the fuck Tiger,” Josh said weakly. “She exploded early.”

“Oh yeah, gamma protocol. It’s always like give or take a minute.” Tiger shrugged, putting her hands on her hips and surveying the bloody mess.

“Liv! Tiger! Josh! We’re gonna take a picture down here!” Gabe called from downstairs. “Bring Jeri if she’s up for it!” Jeri’s headless body tipped over, crashing to the floor. Josh looked like he might cry.

“Be right there!” Liv called down for him.

“…I know how to get more Cameronium.” Josh managed to say, gulping and realizing he’d been holding his breath. Tiger perked up. “We’ll need to leave soon. And fast. Just…give me a minute.”

Liv was about to go and comfort him when Tiger grabbed her shoulder and motioned for her to leave him be. “We’ll go downstairs and distract Gabe and Diane…you’ve got…” Tiger motioned to her face.

“Yeah, I know.” Josh pulled a chunk of something off of his face.

“Oh, and your uncle pulled a gun on us, but we’re fine.” Tiger said as she pulled Liv out of the room. Josh stared at the wall for a few moments before scuffing his shoe against the floor. Liv popped back into the room, scaring him.

“Jesus, I thought you were my mom.” He placed a hand over his heart.

“I bought you a couple minutes. I also told them Jeri actually left. Your mom is worried you’re sad so she sent me back up to comfort you.” Liv whispered. Josh shrugged, stuffing his hands in his pockets. “Do I need to clean blood off your face again?” She tried to tease light heartedly, but Jeri’s corpse was kind of ruining it.

“…do you think you can buy me enough time to shower?” Josh muttered.

“You got it,” Liv started to leave.

“Hey Liv?” Liv’s face appeared back in the doorway. Jeri’s words rang through his head. Probably because she likes you. No, that wasn’t true. “Thanks.” He said, dropping his eyes down to the ground.

“No problem. I’ll get Tiger and Wolf in here to clean up.” Liv said with a gentle smile. “I’ll go buy you some time.”

Downstairs, they took a picture without Josh. The Senecas left and Wanda offered to drive Barry home.

“If you guys go upstairs and start to clean up Josh’s room I’ll stall Gabe and Diane.” Liv whispered to Wolf. Wolf nodded. “And if you see Josh, don’t bring up Jeri.”

“Fine. But I really wanna know what he did to get it all outta her.” Wolf whispered back.

“Later. He’s fucking traumatized- hey Diane! Can I help you with that?” Liv ran off to help Diane clean up dishes. Wolf and Tiger slinked up the stairs to Josh’s room.

“Oh! Thank you, Liv! Such a sweetheart!” Diane thanked her as Liv started collecting champagne glasses. “It’s such a shame that Jeri left. Did Josh seem really sad?”

“…Yeah…” her mind flashed to Josh’s blood covered face and the way he looked like he might’ve cried. “Yeah, he seemed really sad.”

Diane shook her head. “Oh, I’ll have to go give him a big hug later. Is he still in the shower?”

“Probably.” She shrugged and tensed up as she saw Tiger come sneaking down the stairs carrying a bundle of bloody sheets out to the van. “But! Diane!” She tried to keep Diane from looking that way. “I have to tell you about the Kronish Ball!”

“Oh yes!” Gabe looked up from the sink where he was washing dishes. “Tell us all about it Liv!”

“It went so well!” Liv lied. Liv heard a thud from upstairs and covered it up by fake laughing. “And I have to tell you about Kronish’s funny speech!”

Upstairs, Josh came out of the bathroom to see Tiger and Wolf quietly moving Jeri’s body out of his room. His heart dropped all over again. Wolf grabbed Josh’s bundle of bloody clothes from his hands.

“We’ll deal with this later.” He whispered, putting the clothes on Jeri’s corpse. Josh shuffled back into his room to find that surprisingly, Tiger and Wolf had done a pretty good job of cleaning. That or he’d done a really good job of covering everything with sheets.

“You okay?” He jumped, turning around to see Liv. “Sorry! I just came to tell you your parents went into their room and I think they’re going to bed.”

“Okay, thanks Liv.” He sighed and rubbed his forehead.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“Not really.”

“That’s okay. Do you need anything?”

“No.”

“Okay. What’s the plan now?”

“We’re going to James Cameron’s house.”

“…the director?!”

“Yeah.”

“Oh my God…Cameronium.” Liv put the pieces together. Josh gave a grim smile and nodded.

“Do you…want to change your clothes?” Josh asked, pointing to her dress.

“Oh, um, no that’s okay, I don’t have anything to change into. I didn’t bring anything this time.”

“You can wear something of mine.” Josh said without thinking. He’d realized what he’d said when he saw Liv’s face turn bright red. Probably because she likes you echoed through his brain. He brushed away the thought.

“O-oh…” Liv played with her fingers. “That’s okay…”

“Liv, just take a sweatshirt or something.” Josh said, walking to his closet and pulling out a black sweatshirt and sweatpants and throwing them at her. “Do you need some shoes too?”

“No.” She squeaked. “Thanks.” She turned on her heel and went silently to the bathroom. Josh caught himself as a small, endearing smile crossed his face. The door swung open to reveal Wolf and Tiger.

“We’re ready when you guys are.”

[a-la-campanella]

Dreaming of Garbage

AKA misc. Tatalov lore dump lol

It's a little late now to be making an analysis post on the Sweet Dreams "Penacony "The Great Tatalov" video, but who cares? I'm still working an Interstellar Journey post and that video has been out for even longer.

The video, for the most part, alternates between two speakers: Shatana and Himeko. Shatana, of course, is Natasha (they share voice actors, and Shatana is an outright anagram of Natasha). Of the two, Shatana is the only one who actually mentions Tatalov outright. Himeko's voicelines can be read as entirely unrelated to the whole Tatalov plotline going on, so for the purposes of this post, I'm ignoring what she has to say.

Most players won't remember this, but the first mention of Tatalov actually occurred as far back as 1.0 through interacting with a trash can in Boulder Town. (Thanks to u/merofsilence for pointing it out, I didn't catch that!) The dialogue is about the defeat of Garbage King Tatalov, by the hands of a younger trash can.

I... highly doubt these roles are fulfilled by Sampo and the Trailblazer, mostly because even in dreams we'd be able to sus out that Sampo wouldn't talk like that, but I digress; it's a dream at the end of the day. (I also have my doubts about the big trash can that Sampo fights being Tatalov, but that's more likely.) Though I do think this will be the same end we see for Tatalov when we arrive in Penacony, though.

The scenes with garbage or those taking place in Belabog are from the Tatalov dream; everything else is from Penacony, or a dream-like version of the planet. One of the inspirations for Penacony seems to have been Inception, a movie about dreams within dreams; so there are layers to these dreams, right? Reality is Penacony as it truly is/the hotel, and the first level of the dream is where all the fun parts of Penacony are. This makes Tatalov's story in a later level.

I imagine that part of the Penacony story (minus the details of interactions with other characters and actual larger-scale conflict) will go something like this:

The Astral Express crew checks into the hotel on the planet and then gets escorted to their respective rooms to enter the dreaming state. After arriving at their rooms, everyone starts to sleep.

We encounter Firefly in the first level of the dream. The photos with Firefly? She's just showing us around. Seems to have been some kind of conflict we're protecting her from and a secret she's hiding from us, too.

Enter the next dream? Or we enter that dream later.

The Trailblazer's dream brings them back to a Belabog populated by Trash Cans (hence the setting being Belabog), where we reunite with our beloved trash and the Big Bad Sampo.

We meet Shatana, played by Natasha, and she begs us for our help to rise up against Tatalov, who regardless of if he is or isn't represented by Sampo, is the Great Evil we must defeat to save the trash.

She tells us, "since that thing from beyond the sky arrived here along with the Eternal Freeze, Tatalov's eyes have been blinded." The thing from beyond the sky is, perhaps, meant to be the Stellaron, and it turned Tatalov into a poor ruler (maybe a reference to Cocolia?). "We must force the Garbage King to mend his ways under the banner of Skyfire" is just fighting back against Tatalov. Skyfire is a curse we can apply on enemies from Foxian Tales of the Haunted to make them explode, dealing Fire DMG... so probably a reference to that, and a nod towards Preservation Trailblazer. If Skyfire here is meant to mean anything else, then my guess is as good as yours.

Firefly might be sharing this dream with us? We do seem to share the dream with her when exploring Penacony (re: speculation that she exists only in a dream), and there was a trash can next to us when we got bombed, followed by Firefly's comment of "what kind of nonsense is this?" Our dream is too much for her, whoops.

I have no fucking clue who Sampo is talking about when he says "Follow me, you two." Like, one of the two people is probably the Trailblazer, but I'm skeptical to assume the second person could be Shatana... so who knows. Maybe Firefly? Anyways, he appears at some point to get in our way and terrorize the trash cans. What a cruel, evil man...

Success(?) and defeat of Tatlov to follow. The dream might end there, or we might enter a new dream, who knows.

As all this is happening, everyone else is down to business and battle and whatever is going down apparently involves whales. Based off the rough timeline from White Night, this would be during the dreaming time.

It's an absurd story we've dreamt up, but given how fleshed out some of the details are and the full on movie poster at the end of the video, it's likely a story we've been thinking about for a while. Trailblazer's Main Character arc to save the Trash Cans!

Parts I wasn't sure where to fit in timeline-wise:

So a massive Sampo throwing us into to Penacony? That happened, I guess. It could be a dream or it could some Alice In Wonderland mushrooms shit, since there was a massive March at some point too, though that was in a dream, I think...

We may have crashed in front of Robin and Sunday after we were tossed down. The ground from the crater looks similar to the ground in the photos.

There's also a normal-sized "Sampo" (he seems to be manipulated by Sparkle, what with the koi fish flying out of the way to reveal him with glowing eyes) who puts us to sleep at some point outside of the Tatalov dream, perhaps to force us back into that dream.

The part with green framing? I guess that's Sam's POV since the green is similar to his wings. And Acheron teams up with Black Swan and the Trailblazer to fight Sam... why is Black Swan fighting. Does she have something personal against the Stellaron Hunters? She's literally a meme, what the fuck. This is before Acheron has drawn her sword, so this is a different point in time than the one shown in White Night.

There's a quick sequence that doesn't really mean a lot yet; some bubbles, the... watch thingy or whatever floating in Penacony (I didn't pay attention during the livestream, no clue what its called), and some ID cards or some shit. I can't make out the letters well enough to translate them to English but it's at 1:04 for anyone interested.

[jedifighterpilot2727]

Every Time a Bomb Explodes, a Super Gets Their Cape

A continuation of the episode, "It's a Super Life" plus my own brand of fifth dimensional magic. Consider the episode as if Kara felt like she were actually living every alternate reality that Myx showed her. Don't mind me, I'm just goofin'; new chapter goofin'.      

Wow, let's see, what all has happened since my last update . . . a global pandemic, the world as we knew it is over, my life partner died, my dog died, my desire to write died - for a while, but hopefully its back now. I'm back, at any rate; with an extremely morbid sense of humor and a new found love for red dirt country music. Hopefully y'all will enjoy this update, and hopefully its the beginning of an era of new material for me.  The scene opens at the end of the episode when Kara is confronting Lena.

         https://archiveofourown.org/works/9100903/chapters/120529348

"Let me guess. You're here to tell me once again that I should forgive you. Or maybe that I shouldn't work with my brother?" Lena's tone is biting, and it takes everything Kara has to stand her ground.

"Not this time. I recognize that I made a mistake in hiding my identity from you for so long. But the past is the past, and I can't change it. Forgive me or not, that's your choice. Just like it's your choice to work with Lex. I'm done blaming myself for your bad decisions."

"Then why are you here?"

Kara takes a steadying breath before she lays out what she came to say. "To tell you that from now on you're accountable for your own actions. If you decide to forgive me, I will be there for you. But if you continue to work with Lex, if you go through with whatever it is the two of you are planning, I will do everything in my power to stop you. Just like I would any other villain."

It breaks her heart to say it, but she has to.

Or at least, some part of her feels like she has to.

The rest of her is screaming, begging herself to realize that Lena is anything but a villain, that Lena would never do anything to intentionally hurt her.

Back at her apartment, the smell of stale popcorn permeates the air, Normally, it would make her hungry, but tonight it just makes her sad - memories of movie nights with Lena long past.

She barely makes it to the couch before she crumples, one arm coming up to cover her face; the crook of her elbow doing little to muffle her sobs.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Kara comes awake with a start, barely feeling like she’d closed her eyes. Groaning, she flops back in the bed, hands coming up to swipe where she knows the tears have dried salty tracks onto her skin.

Only, there aren’t any tear tracks, and her eyes don’t feel the tired soreness that they normally would after a night of crying. In fact, she doesn’t really feel like she’s spent the night in any sort of emotional   distress at all - minus the aching loss in her chest.

Lena.

She can’t believe she’s really   done it. She’s gone and ruined any chance she had of repairing her friendship with her once best friend.

Part of her wants to take it all back; wants to go to Lena and beg for forgiveness once again. To grovel and plead for Lena to forget the ultimatum that Kara given her.

She doesn’t want to hurt Lena.

In fact, she doubts that if the time came to follow through on actually treating like a villain that she would be able to do it. It was a flimsy threat; on the inside, at least, but she thinks it’s that she put up enough of a tough exterior to fool Lena into at least thinking twice before she tries anything drastic.

Because as much as Kara hates to be the one to do it, someone has to try to stop Lena’s spiral. Kara has seen just how powerful Lena can be as an unstoppable force for good, and she hates to think what that genius and determination could do if used for evil.

She prays to Rao she never has to witness it.

Groaning again, she rolls over until she’s face first in the pile of pillows and the scent from the sheets sends ice running through her veins.

Lavender and mint.

The smell of Lena’s shampoo.

She’d know it anywhere, had purposefully imprinted it onto her brain during their many ‘too long to be purely platonic’ hugs. It was like a calming aromatherapy; a scent that she always associated with Lena being safe and not mad at her, and most importantly - in Kara’s arms.

Only now her brain is playing tricks on her, because none of those things are true.

Not after Kara told Lena the Supergirl secret.

Not after Lena locked her in the fortress of solitude.

Not after the multiverses collided.

Not after . . .

Myx.

The thought sends her reeling, and she lurches to a sitting position; taking in the expansive room with the high ceilings and the tasteful artwork.

It’s definitely not her apartment in National City.

She forces herself to take a deep breath, despite the nerves jangling in her chest.

What has Myx done?

What strange universe has he dropped her off in?

What horrors await her?

She can still feel the lingering ache from the knowledge of how truly devastating it was to see a version of Lena bound to evil and she dreads what this new universe might hold.

She supposes the quickest way to end this torture is get on with it, to see whatever Myx wants her to see so he can pull her back home again.

After taking a few minutes to do what she can to calm her anxiety, she turns over on her side, resisting the urge to pull the blankets over her head and nuzzle into the fluffy pillow. Instead, she focuses on what she can see in front of her.

Her glasses, folded on the bedside table, rest next to a half empty glass of water and a picture frame. The picture inside is what gets her; it’s one of her and Lena that she’s never seen before, with Lena peering over Kara’s shoulder like she’s getting a piggy back ride, smiles plastered on both their faces and Lena’s arms gripping tightly around Kara’s shoulders. Unbidden, t brings a grin to Karas’s face, and a hope that maybe, at least in this universe, she and Lena have managed to still stay friends.

Ready to face the inevitable, she tosses back the covers and swings her feet onto the hardwood floor, flexing her toes and raising her arms above her head in a stretch. No matter what the rest of the universe held, this bed definitely slept better than her usual.

Cautiously, she pads down the hall, unsure of what to expect or why Myx chose to drop her off in a bedroom of all places. From what she can tell, the apartment is expansive and she wonders if this is the universe where she succeeds as a hard hitting reporter.

A noise from down the hall startles her, and she shakes her head - maybe this is just the universe where she has roommates.

She follows the sounds to the massive kitchen, only to find a dark haired figure with their back to Kara digging through the fridge. The sight stops her dead in her tracks.

Everything about the figure seems familiar - from the jet black hair piled into a messy bun, the perfect posture of the stance, to the soft humming.

Not many people have gotten the chance to see the world’s most powerful CEO in her natural habitat - in fact Kara considers herself  lucky to be among the few who have, and what she’s seen leaves no doubt in her mind who the figure is.

“Lena.” she breathes out, shoulders slumping as the tension at what this universe might hold is lifted.

To her surprise though, Lena only snorts before turning around, a piece of pizza drooping from her fingers.

“No, but that’s not the first time I’ve gotten that! Like mother like daughter, I guess!”

It’s then Kara realizes that woman standing across the counter from her is decidedly not Lena. Although she does look eerily familiar, almost like an exact replica of Kara’s best friend but with startling blue eyes where green ones should be and a Cal-Tech t-shirt instead of an MIT one. Plus she doesn’t  think she’s ever seen Lena eat cold pizza.

“Daughter?” Kara repeats dumbly and the woman’s brow  crinkles as she tilts her head and chews the bite of pizza she’d taken.

“Are you alright YeYu?” the woman finally asks when she’s finished. “I knew you were feeling worse than you let on after that fight last night, do I need to call Aunt Alex?”

Kara quickly holds up a hand to stop the younger woman; the last thing she needs is Alex getting involved before she can figure out this universe.

“No, no, I’m fine; just a little dazed, I guess. Weird dream.”

The woman still looks suspicious, but she shrugs before turning back to the refrigerator.

“Well, I know what will get you back to normal.” she says before tossing a pizza box on the counter in front of Kara.

“Pizza?” Kara stops the box before it slides off the granite, unable to stop her grin when she sees the logo of her favorite pizza place.

“Of course, food always cheers you up; that’s why Ma ordered extra last night and told me to hide it from you until this morning. She also asked me to look out for you, you took some pretty rough hits last night.”

Now that made sense, Lena sending her daughter to check in on Kara while she herself is busy at the office. That definitely sounds like the Lena that Kara knows and loves - busy, but always caring.

“Oh, is that why you’re here?”

“Well, no, I’m here because mine and Taylor’s apartment is getting fumigated and Ma insisted that we couldn’t get a hotel and that we had to stay with you guys. You know how she gets when she sets her mind to something. . . I thought she told you?”

“Yeah, yeah, I remember her saying something now. Before the uh, before the fight. Slipped my mind.” Avoiding the woman’s concerned look, Kara ducked her head to take a too large bite of pizza. “Speaking of your mother, where, uh, where is she?”

“She woke Taylor up at the crack of dawn this morning to go shop for something wedding related. I wasn’t invited.” Kara swears she sees just the tiniest bit of Lena’s patented pout cross the girl’s face before it quickly disappears. “But it’s okay, I really appreciate you guys stepping in, she doesn’t really talk about it much but I know Tay enjoys having a mom figure to help with wedding stuff. I mean Pops does his best but she showed me  some of the wedding dresses he suggested and yikes, the man does not have any sense of wedding fashion.”

“Pops?” Kara’s heart pounds and she tries to appear nonchalant as she picks a slice of pepperoni off her pizza. Is this Lena’s significant other? A spark of jealousy flares but she tamps it down.

“Oh, that’s my new nickname for Mike!” the woman laughs. “I think it irritates him about as much as him calling me ‘Lexington’ all the time does to me. Although, he did call me Lexi at the engagement party last week, so I feel like we’re making progress!”

Lexi, that’s Lena’s daughter’s name, Kara makes a point to file it away for later.

“Right, cause Mike is . . . “ her curiosity about Lena’s potential love interest refuses to be sated.

“Taylor’s dad?” Lexi frowns. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

“And Taylor is?” Kara pushes, ignoring Lexi’s concern.

“My fiancee? Yeyu, are you sure you’re alright after that fight? I know you’re Supergirl, but still, I’m worried about you and I know Ma is too.”

“I’m fine, little one.” The term of endearment rolls off Kara’s tongue without thought. “I just need some pizza and a shower and I’ll be good as new.”

Lexi eyes her suspiciously for a few moments before seeming to accept her answer.

“Okay, well, I have to make a few work calls, but then Ma wants us to meet them out for brunch if you feel up to it.”

“Of course I feel up to it, I’m fine, I promise.” She offers Lexi a reassuring smile, and after a long moment of scrutiny the younger woman nods.

“Fine, but if you need me just call okay?”

“Okay, I will.” Kara promises again, and Lexi pulls her into a quick hug before starting down the hall, leaving Kara slightly stunned in her wake.

She has got to figure this weird universe out.

A universe where she and Lena are still close, where not only do Lena and her daughter both know her Supergirl secret and Lena’s daughter feels comfortable in her house, but a universe where Kara is most definitely missing one of the key pieces to the puzzle.

After a quick listen to make sure that Lexi is out of earshot, she grabs one more slice of pizza and puts the rest of the box back in the refrigerator before making her way to the room where she started. If she hopes to learn anything from this universe, she has to start by understanding exactly how this one is different.

She flies, (not literally), to the closet, gasping when the door opens to a gigantic room with automatic lighting and rows of red bottom shoes lining the shelves.

Shoot.

One side of the closet is lined with dark fabrics - dresses with plunging necklines and three piece suits; the other more pastel with cardigans and button downs. The real evidence is in the underwear drawer - lacy thongs that Kara would never wear and bras that are two cup sizes too big.

Double shoot.

Of course Myx would drop her in a universe where Lena not only accepted her Supergirl secret but her ‘I love you’ secret as well.

She doesn’t think her heart can take it.

Maybe they’re just roommates.

Maybe she only lives with Lena because they’re best friends, and Kara’s unrequited love is securely under wrap -

Slowly, she backs out of the closet, focusing on the floor length mirror beside the closet. Her eyes fixate on her left hand - the ring on her ring finger  and the bracelet around her wrist.

Great.

So not only is she living with Lena, she’s married to Lena.

Shit.

She looks down at her clothes, the sushi pajama bottoms are no surprise, but the 'Luthor-Danvers Children’s Hospital 5k’ t-shirt throws her for a loop.

Luthor-Danvers?

They changed their last name to Luthor- Danvers?

As soon as the thought hits, she’s struck with a memory.

 ”I can’t wait to be Mrs. Danvers.” Lena whispers shyly into her neck.

 Kara snorts.

 “Mrs. Danvers? I can’t wait to be Mrs. Luthor!”

 She can feel Lena stiffen beside her and the younger woman look up at her.

 “Why would you want to be Mrs. Luthor? All this name is is bad luck and a bad reputation.”

 “Well, it used to be, but you’ve changed that! it’s also synonymous with the world’s fore-leading  cancer treatments and the most humanitarian tech company. You did that, Lena. It doesn’t matter what your brother did, you’ve changed the name for good. I want to be a part of that, I would be happy to wear the name Luthor.”

 Lena fights back emotion, refusing to swipe at the tears streaking down her cheeks.

 “Well, I want to be apart of the Danvers family, a family that took in an alien with no qualms about their status and treated her like one of their own.”

 “Alright, how about a hyphenated name then?” Kara suggests with a smile.

 “Hyphenated?”

 “Yeah, like Luthor-Danvers.”

 “What about Danvers-Luthor?”

 “No.” Kara quickly objects. “What?! Why? I like Luthor-Danvers!”

 “Darling I think it might be good to lead with the name that isn’t hated internationally.” Lena is quick to point out.

 “They don’t hate it nearly as much as they used to! You’re doing so much good! Besides, Luthor-Danvers rolls off the tongue so much better!”

 Lena rolls her eyes, but Kara can tell she’s slowly breaking her down.

 “Fine, Kara and Lena Luthor-Daners; does that make you happy?”

Kara shudders as the memory dissipates and she shakes off the lingering uneasiness. This universe is entirely too real, and she finds herself wondering if Myx is really in control or if things have gotten out of hand.

Slowly, she backs up to the bed behind her, allowing herself to fall back onto the comforter.

This is the last thing she needs, really.

To experience a universe where all her dreams come true, where she and Lena are together, where she and Lena have a family, where . . .

A family.

The thought strikes her with sudden clarity.

Are you alright YeYu?” Lexi’s voce echoes in her memory, and she gasps at the realization.

Lexi isn’t just Lena’s daughter, but she’s Kara’s as well. The Kryptonian term had slipped through her rattled brain before, but now it sounds like a bell.

YeYu.

Mother.

A term she doesn’t thinks she’s heard since she referred to her own mother by it so many years ago.

The memory has her bolting upright, gaze flickering around the room until it lands on a picture by the window.

It’s her and Lena, faces sandwiching Lexi’s as they all group together in a side hug, wide smiles on all their faces and Lexi in a cap and gown.

Slowly, she walks towards the frame and takes it off the wall, almost startling when the picture changes and she realizes that the frame is digital.

The next picture is of Kara and Lena at the beach - all smiles and suntans, (or in Lena's case, a darker shade of pale), the image of the phone used to take the picture mirrored in their sunglasses.

The next is of Kara and Lena with a toddler (presumably Lexi), dressed in Supergirl pajamas.

Again, the picture shifts, and this time it’s a close up of two hands with engagement rings and a couple kissing in the background which Kara assumes must be Lexi and Taylor. The next photo confirms it; a family photo with Kara, Lena, Lexi, Taylor, and a middle age man that Kara assumes is Mike.

It’s jarring, to have her alternate life presented this way; a series of pictures and almost memories that don’t quite connect.

She stares at the frame long enough to wonder just how many hours of pictures that  it holds and who would have spent the time to upload them all.

Lena, of course.

Lena, who always painstakingly put together photos of the super friends to arrange around her office. Lena, who no matter how much she acted like she didn’t care about sentimental things, would always spend copious amounts of time picking out the perfect gift; even if it wasn’t for a special occasion.

Lena.

It hits her, all of the sudden, how Lena must feel - everyone that she’s opened up to lying to her. And maybe the intention was to protect Lena from the truth, (from Kara’s true feelings), but she can understand now how Lena felt. She can't imagine the hurt it would bring to know that all of the people she loves are lying to her.

Over something as asinine as Supergirl’s identity.

Lena has proven herself as an ally over and over again, and Kara can’t quite rationalize her deceit.

Kara takes a shuddering breath, trying to control her emotions.

Sure, being an alien, (and Supergirl by extension), is her secret to keep; but it isn’t like she kept it from a ton of people. All of the people in her immediate circle knew, (except Lena), and she’s pretty sure most of the baristas at Noonan’s know, not to mention the pizza delivery guy Charlie, and Mr Kim, who owns the Chinese restaurant on 3rd Street, (and makes the best potstickers in the world).

She doesn’t know why she didn’t tell Lena.

(That’s a lie, she knew before she even had the thought.)

She just doesn’t want to think about it.

Doesn’t want to acknowledge her secret fantasy where she and Lena become something more -

More than colleagues, more than friends, more than best friends; something . . .  romantic.

No, not just romantic.

More like . . . soulmates.

Her eyes re-focus on the picture frame in her lap, and this time it’s a picture of only Lena and herself - one she presumes is from their wedding day. Lena’s hair is pulled back in a familiar severe bun, but a lace veil is flowing over it, and tendrils of jet black hair that have escaped are curling towards  her red lipstick as she smiles up at Kara. Kara, who’s dressed in white Kryptonian robes, a giant grin splitting her face.

Tears cloud her vision as the picture shifts again, but she refuses to wipe them away. Instead, she focuses inward - on the deep seated fear that whenever she told Lena the truth her whole world - real and fantasy - would collapse.

Which is . . . exactly what happened.

She lost Lena because of her own stupid -

Her super hearing perks up as footsteps echo in the hall, and she suddenly remembers that Lena’s -  that her daughter is expecting her to be ready for brunch.

She super speeds through the motions  of showering and dressing before rushing to the bedroom door. She yanks it open to find Lexi poised to knock, hand raised in a fist mere inches from the door.

If looking at Lexi before felt like looking at a hologram of Lena, now it feels like looking in a mirror.

A sort of distorted, time altering mirror.

A mirror where she has black hair and a better sense of style.

Cat Grant would be proud.

“Hey, you’re ready.” Lexi’s eyes flick over her quickly before focusing on her phone. “Ian is going to pick us up in five minutes, hope you don’t mind - I have some work stuff I need to take care of and -“ she smirks up at Kara, “- we both know how bad you are at driving.”

’That was ten years ago!” Kara exclaims before realizing that she doesn’t even remember what happened ten years ago. Or maybe . . .

Vaguely she remembers an incident from when Lexi was learning to drive, - a blurry memory of panic and over compensation; and a worried and angry  Lena berating her over her loss of control.

She shakes the memory off with a shrug; instead refocusing on Lexi’s appearance.

Black shirt with the long sleeves rolled up and black dress pants, with a brown belt and brown boots. Frowning, she looks down at her almost identical outfit before she catching sight of Lexi’s hair.

Kryptonian braids are intertwined elegantly in a style that Kara remembers her Aunt Astra teaching her oh so many years ago.  Unbidden, another memory plays out in her mind's eye, this one in perfect detail.

 "Hold still, little one, I'm almost done." Kara's right hand drops from the braid she's working on to rest on Lexi's shoulder. The seven year old is mindlessly fidgeting, chewing on her cuticles, and guilty blue eyes meet Kara's in the mirror in front of them.

 "Sorry Yeyu." Lexi's hand drops, as does her expression, and there's a moment of silence before she asks tentatively -

 "Do you think there are going to be a lot of people there?"

 Kara can only assume that she's referring to the science fair that they're getting ready for, and she hums thoughtfully, deft fingers finishing the braid before she answers.

 "I think there's probably going to be a fair amount of people there," she turns the little girl to face her. "Does that make you nervous?"

 Lexi nods, and Kara leans in conspiratorially; adjusting Lexi's collar where it comes out from under her sweater.

 "Well, the good news is, the convention center where the science fair is, is only a half a block from one of the best ice cream shops in the whole world."

 Lexi's eyes widen and Kara continues.

 "Something tells me that we can probably convince your mama to take us there after the science fair."

 Lexi's eyes widen comically more.

 "Before dinner?"

 "I mean,  this is a pretty special occasion, and your mama has been known to go wild every now and then." Kara winks. "We might even be able to convince her that mint chocolate chip ice cream counts as something green."

 Lexi giggles at that, and as if on cue, Lena's voice echoes up the stairs.

 "The driver is here! Are you two ready?"

 "Coming!" Kara yells over her shoulder before pulling Lexi into a tight hug. "I'm proud of you, okay? You're going to do great."

 Little arms tighten around Kara's neck, and the memory fades as quickly as it came on.

Kara blinks, and the present comes back into focus - only it's the same blue eyes peering at her from behind glasses, and the same Kryptonian braids as the memory - as if twenty years had passed in a second.

It all hits Kara like a punch to the gut from Superman.

What happens if Myx puts her in a universe that she doesn't want to leave?

[vortship]

@normalestxhumanxzim​ con’t from discord

Zim stared as she spoke, Zim stared for what felt like almost TWO YEARS, eleven months, and TEN DAYS. Perhaps it even was that long to him. He listened, though as Zim did it was mostly for the sake of finding any moment and any reason to interject. After all, Zim's best method of convincing people to do what he wanted them to do was to just insult them repeatedly. To his credit, this mostly worked, but not for the reasons perhaps he thought they did. Nevertheless, Hal was allowed to explain herself. He partially also had to consider what a dweezil was. Perhaps it was good actually? He'd have to look into it.

"GRRRR, I KNOW WHAT YOUR NUMBER IS!!!" The irken shouted back, narrowed angry eyes glowered directly into her soul. He had no idea what her number actually was and paused for a moment, expecting her to call his bluff for some reason. A bluff that was only particularly relevant to him and him alone.

Seemingly punctuating Zim's statement, one of the nacelles had fallen off of voot, collapsing off of its hull unceremoniously and simply rolling off the landing pad and exploded, much to Gir's apparent joy. The invader exhaled a brief sigh of exhaustion before gathering himself and continuing. "Anyway, heheh... I'M NOT GETTING ANOTHER SHIP!!!"

Zim exploded, edging closer to Hal. "Children like you these days have NO concept of value! Though perhaps nothing else could have been expected from a... Filthy VORT!" It was clear Zim had to think for a moment on which xenophobic insult to use, he really settled on that, huh? "The V2 may be an older ship, but its strategic value is unparalleled. You don't need personality matrixes if you're a skilled enuff pilot anyway!" Zim recalled singlehandedly piloting super amazingly through an astroid field, keeping up with Tak. Forgetting the parts where he almost died. "Besides, back before you were even born I was modifying my voot, piece by piece. To say that it even resembled the V2 is sheer ignorance. Besides, when I was being chased by those HORRIBLE, horrible space monkeys on Lebuloan nine, IT TOOK OUT THEIR WHOLE INTERCEPTOR FLEET!!!" Clearly, he was quite proud of this thing. "We're fixing it and YOU'RE HELPING!!!"

Her number... now that she thought about it was that even a thing? They'd always just barked 'Nima!' at her when the guards wanted her attention; tall, intimidating Irken soldiers. Sometimes it was hard to remember Zim himself was one of them, minus the tall part. Perhaps her mind should be falling on that whole gratitude thing again. It could be worse, it could always be worse. Zim might be Irkens at their most maniacal, but he wasn’t Irkens at their most awful. 

Ones and zeros... ones and zeros. 

That’s all they were, right? No matter how much they seemed like people. They were nothing but vessels of war and misfortune, this one was no different. Folding her arms, the child flinched as a piece of Zim’s precious Voot exploded right in front of them. A look of shock turned into an annoyed glance at her screaming ‘boss’.

“You need another ship! What’s wrong with just getting their ‘snackliests’ to send you one!?”

For that matter, why did their ‘snackliests’ never check in much? She had a lot of questions, none of which she at all trusted Zim to answer. What did they want with Earth anyway? It was so far from basically everything. It didn’t even have any other habitable planets around it! And it’s people could barely visit their own moon. She quirked a brow at Zim’s reminiscing. Everybody knew Irken tech was just Vortian tech with red paint, running about a hundred cycles behind. 

“Children like me? You sound like a sad old man.” she teased, “I never said anything about the personality matrix! That would just make more you... which sounds awful!”

Her mind wandered to Halship and she shuddered. No. No personality matrixes ever. Ugh, now he had her yelling. Just a big yell-off. They happened at least once a day. Before she was even born, huh? Zim in a Hal-less world. It was probably much quieter. She wondered if he’d hated Vortians back then too, or if it was a hivemind thing brought about from conquering them.

“Ugh fine.” what choice did she have, really?, “But we’re listening to K-Pop the entire time, really loud.” 

[slightlyslytherinthings]

Secret fears Part 1

Part 2 Part 3 (final)

Include: Y/N, Sebastian, Ominis (some side characters as well)

Trigger warning: angst, crucio

It will be split into parts.

As the DADA class begin Prof. Hecat welcomed the students and started to explain the todays lesson.

"Good morning everyone, this day lesson, I want to teach you a quite important spell, it will help you face your fears and to overcome them."

Unsure what that meant, everyone was looking at each other. You looked at your best friends, Ominis and Sebastian. Sebastian whispered to you, "Don't worry. I think she is speaking of the ridiculous charm."

"Ridiculous charm?", you asked. "Yes it can be used to defeat boggarts.", he explained. Even more confused you questioned, "Boggarts?"

"Mr. Sallow, instead of only explaining it to Y/LN. Why don't you bless the whole class with your knowledge?"

"Sorry. Prof. Hecat. The ridiculous charm is a spell to defeat boggerts, which forms into the observer's worst fear. By casting it you have to think about something funny, to turn the boggart into something amusing. The incarnation word is "Riddikulus".", Sebastian explain.

"Correct. 10 points to Slytherin.", Hecat said with approval. "Now I want all of you to perfom the wand movements as I do and speak clearly the incarnation 'Riddikulus.'"

After everyone in the class tried to follow Hecate up, you messed the performance up. "Y/N, what are you doing- wait let me help you" Sebastian said amused by your hilarious movement. He put his hand over yours and guided you to move it correctly. Your face expression quietly thanked him. He grinned at his success pridefully.

"What is a lesson without real practice" Hecat continue, "I want you to line up before the wardrobe."

As Hecat moved the tables and chairs to the side, every student moved to the middle in a crowd. With whispers of any direction, about what everyons worst fear might be and already try to get a clue how to shape it into something funny. You heard someone say, "...that is going to be so good, knowing what Sallow fears, will surely help me to win the next duel." You tried to recognize who said that and searched where the voice where coming from. Of course, Leander just said that. You tried to bottle up the urge to punch him, for talking like that over Sebastian. Sebastian noticed your frustration and calmed you. "Don't worry this fool will never have the chance to win a duel against me." he winked at you.

The first in line was Everrett who was first quite confident but as Hecat open the wardrobe, a wibbly wobbly thing just came up and shaped in different ways just before it got a clear shape of Everretts worst fear.

He was not exactly knowing what he feared, maybe some beasts, maybe even Imelda who won in a broom racing duel and humiliating him in front of everyone but for his surprise it was his broom, which he worked so hard for and saved up every knut to buy the one in his intrest for so long. Just laying there in tiny pieces with brand marks.

With a devastating look on his face he heard laughter behind him. He started to rationalize and concentrate again, with a smooth hand performance he said "Riddikulus". As the spell hit the boggart it starts turning in a huge stink bomb exploding in same secound.

Everyone was coughing, and screaming, some even started to gag. You pressed your robe on your nose to cover it, the smell was awful, like rotting meat. The tables had turned, Everett was the only one laughing. "Quite good execution, you will earn house points for that but for putting your classmates in such a disaster, I will also have to give you minus points. It's 0 then." Hecat confessed, covering her nose and performing a spell to distinguish the smell.

"Next one please", as you heard Prof. Hecat. You could feel hands on your back pushing you forward. You were nervous not of the fear itself but what possibly would be your fear. You overcome a lot of things in the last years. You escaped death so often, you faced to many dreadful things you couldn't imagine what could be the worst one. You look to Sebastian, who gave you a comforting glance, which expresses that he is believing in you and your capabilities. As you moved forward closer to the boggart. You still tried to figur it out, dark wizards, trolls and goblins or even spiders weren't so scary at all anymore since you already encountered so many of them, you got used to it. What could it be then?

You stayed straight towards the boggart, watching quite closely what it could turn into. It took a while as you could start to see a silhouette, you started to deny it. As you could finally see what the boggart assumed your worst fear, you got immensely confused. Not knowing what that supposed to mean. Concluding from the fast whispers behind you, it was clear that you weren't the only one being confused. As you look over your shoulder to Everrett who also tried to riddle why the boggart turn into that. Leander also was confused and frowning giving you a serious side eye. Your eyes filled with perplexity wandering to Sebastian searching for comfort and support. But his confidant smile turned into disbelief, he himself looked like he would face his own fear.

You could see Ominis nearing his head to Sebastian to ask him in what creature the boggart turned into. But Sebastian couldn't answer, he was crushed by not knowing what that supposed to mean.

You know you had to face it, so you tried to bring up confidence, even without support from Sebastian. Saying to yourself, you have to overcome it and to find out what that boggart is trying, in fact you got furious that this vicious beasts is playing games with you.

With a deep breath you looked straight into your fear into that boggart. The fear that you faced was no one else then Sebastian.

Sebastian Sallow, well the boggart, who portraits itself as Sebastian Sallow. Started taking a wand to his hand. You unsure what it supposed to mean, positioned your wand in the direction of the Sebastian-boggart. But you hesitate to cast the ridiculous charm, since you forgot in the heat of moment to think about something funny infact, you were far from hilarious thoughts. Because you begin to realize which fear you were exactly facing. For your classmates they could assum it was about a silly crush towards him. But it was darker than that, darker than those innocent teenagers around you could possible even imagine.

The boggart performed with the wand movements of a charm you unfortunately knew to well. You couldn't speak or move, infact you felt petrified. As the boggart called the cruciatus curse on you. You fall on to your knees, your limbs started to cramp, putting your hands toward your chest with pain, your eyes nearly rolled into your head.

Hecat intervene after a moment of shook, not knowing to expect something like that to happend.

As Natty stormed foward, "Riddikulus!" she said turning the Sebastian boggart into colibris. Hecat performaned a spell to capture the boggart back to the wardrobe. She dismissed the class with an exercise to write an essay about boggarts and that everyone should try to think about their fear and how to overcome them. She ordered Everrett and Natty to help her carry you to Hospital Wing. You blacked out as they grabbed your arms to get you up.

[lightcreators]

@tiimecrash continue from here

A soft ( yet amused ) smiled graced the Professor’s lips. She was surprised to say the least that her husband the current one here in France allowed this regeneration to come visit their little safe space. Their protected timeline, but she did have a small part in talking her old man into letting his future self stay there. She looked over to him, as she was puttering away in the small garden near the home. He allowed her freedom to have her gardens and plants along with his vineyard. After all, she could possibly be the reason he became interested in botany in the first place. “You can thank the old man for picking it out. He’s got an eye for beautiful things.” a small chuckled escaped her lips. Where the old man was, she didn’t know. Sometimes he would leave when his future self showed up, but not always.

She knew her husband ( in any form ) had business to attend to. Plans upon plans of the secretive nature. He was not a good person in actions. He had done horrible things but somehow she forgave him for it. All at the cost of this safe place with him. Was it a foolish move? Perhaps, but she was better safe than on the other end of his plans. She loved him, more than anything. That’s why she forgave his monstrosities during the time war, and he was making it up to her. A small formed on her lips, watching her husband reading his book about viticulture. Strange he needed a book for something he should know about. “Since when do you need glasses?” she laughed some, putting her pruning equipment away and approached him. “ -- they suit you. It makes you look --- dignified. I quite like it.”

A grin on her lips, she rounded the chair he was sitting in, before ruffling his hair. Standing behind him, she leant over to take a look over the book on viticulture.  Shaking her head. she kissed his temple. Here in this little timeline - this safe space she was free to be romantic. “Did he make you read this? I bet he did, he thinks you of all people don’t know how to take care of your own bloody vineyard.” That’s when she looked at the rows of vines out in the pasture. She knew for a fact his previous self thought he wasn’t competent enough to know anything. It was silly, she thought.  She sighed happily before sitting in a chair next to her husband. “The real question is, are you happy here?” she asked him.

Cooperate  with  himself  sounded  most  conceivable  improbability,  though  every  day,  he  could  feel  how  perfected  it  could  be,  how  magnificient  as  a  teamwork  they  could  work  —  minus  usual  argue  about  their  diverging  opinions,  when  he  was  pleased  the  old  man  remained  over  his  exasperation  of  ‘the  youth’  when  his  views  displeased  the  incarnation  he  had  been  …  All  things  considered,  it  was  an  nice  reflection,  an  funny  show  in  which  he  could  reflecting  himself  physically  and  when  his  thoughtfulness  wasn’t  minded.  His  previous  self  also  had  his,  and  regardless  about  being  himself,  he  won’t  never  exploded  layers  of  his  current  mindset,  leave  an  complete  mask  over  his  thoughts,  inside  that  sensitivity  carefulness  he  remembered  so  clearly.  That  old  man  decided,  inside  that  mountain  of  irony,  to  calling  himself  Yana  —  where  he  couldn’t  hardly  called  him  an  'helper’  but  an  hard-worked  instead,  so  meticulous  that  he  didn’t  want  the  youth  to  spoil  the  meaning  of  his  actions.  It  was  an  changing  overlook  hence  he  remained  amused  most  of  times,  and  acted  with  his  annoyance  in  an  healthy  way  he  wouldn’t  have  never  imagined  before.  Inside  that  little  vineyard,  while  he  strove  to  make  the  business  as  lucrative  as  possible  and  the  old  man  strove  to  give  the  best  of  qualities,  he  cannot  speak  of  Featherine.  Or  the  MIB  who  had  been  endlessly  watching  over  him  until  he  came  into  that  closed  timeline,  inside  that  protective  bubble,  as  he  came  to  flee  to  seek  peace  …  Maybe,  from  another  dimension  perspective,  they  were  resumed  to  been  watched,  but  with  an  most  understanding  and  silent  gaze  …  He  personally  offered  endless  comedy.

As  much  he  desired  to  take  back  an  old  alias  of  his,  as  much  he  wanted  once  more  reach  higher  spheres  inside  the  human  society  for  having  his  needs  of  power  fullfilled,  he  couldn’t.  He  couldn’t  neither  risking  Featherine  spotting  his  previous  self  …  who  had  run  away  of  the  War,  run  away  of  Gallifrey,  run  away  of  every  opportunity  available  on  his  spot  …  who  had  running  away  differently  in  the  way  he  eventually  came  into  existence,  where  there  was  reassurance  no  one  would  found  him  …  It  was  no  point  to  speak  about  Theta.  Besides,  he  learned  existence  of  such  place  thanks  to  a  letter,  who  invited  him  to  cooperation  …  in  which  he  guessed  he  must  had  been  himself  who  inclining  him  to  visiting  himself.  Though,  in  no  way,  there  was  intent  to  act  like  Theta  did  with  himself.  He  wanted  a  true  and  clear  parternship  between  each  other.  Besides,  he  was  an  settled  down  visitor,  discovering  shape  reality  of  an  chessboard  having  an  Game  Master,  where  he  could  learn  more  than  simply  keep  an  business  going  …  beyond  to  just  touch  happiness  he  longed  for.  Tiredness  had  been  weighting  within  the  previous  weeks  before  his  arrival  here.  That  old  man  didn’t  comment  over  how  emotionally  destroyed  he  looked,  weight  of  these  things  left  unsaid,  from  heaviness  of  an  imprecise  truth  of  the  future  …  where  mentally,  he  didn’t  wanted  to  been  constantly  watched.  Where  emotionally,  he  needed  a  break.  Hence  he  decided  to  treat  that  newest  experience  as  a  'holiday’,  and  for  make  such  experience  worthwhile,  deleting  any  kind  of  potential  problems,  to  take  comedy  taste  at  his  higher.  He  was  going  to  appear  friendliest  possible,  giving  himself  friendliest  appearance  even  if  it  meant  changing  his  dress  code  which  was  more  in  keeping  with  the  season  of  the  place,  let  an  obvious  charm  shine  through,  and  take  every  day  as  a  good  entertainment  opportunity.  He  was  on  fringe  just  before  he  mentally  exploded  and  listened  uncontrolled  urges  for  reinforced  violence.  He  would  get  what  he  wanted  with  a  beautiful,  flirtatious,  deceptive  smile,  and  gain  the  control  he  wanted  while  remaining  harmless.  It  would  be  impossible  to  do  great  things  initially,  which  frustrated  him,  but  eventually  he  would.  He  would  understand  how  to  truly  be  a  Master  of  these  chessboards  he  had  crossed  so  many  times.  He  would  finally  figure  out  how  to  put  himself  on  an  equal  footing  with  Featherine.  While  allowing  himself  to  no  longer  be  chained  in  the  invisible  chains  that  had  nailed  him  to  the  ground  …  him,  the  man  who  fled  to  bounce  back  better,  what  a  twist  !

Her  presence  was  making  the  entire  difference.  He  was  probably  only  one  of  his  selves  that  would  be  allowed  to  stay  here  as  long  as  he  wanted  —  he  noticed,  firstly,  how  their  gaze  met  and  mutually  understood  each  other,  wordlessly.  The  old  man  was  perceiving  the  kind  of  suffering  he  would  eventually  live,  or  sparing  himself  by  staying  inside  his  little  protective  bubble.  He  could  understood  exactly  where  that  old  man  was  standing.  Reason  who  pushed  him  to  act  that  way  this  time  —  influenced  maybe  by  the  same  person  —  meanwhile  keeping  his  old  secrets.  Knowing  himself,  he  avoid  been  around  when  the  old  man  showed  desires  to  remaining  alone  with  his  wife.  In  some  compromise,  he  had  to  'share’  her  with  himself  ;  in  which  he  was  an  welcomed  bonus.  On  the  opposite,  sometimes  afterwards  some  conversations  like  himself  like  he  did  previously,  the  old  man  returned  to  some  discrete  business  he  wasn’t  aware  of.  An  laugh  welcomed  his  expression  as  he  watched  her.  Appreciating  the  gentleness  of  her  various  names  around  that  place.  Sola,  the  Time  Lady  he  had  been  in  his  care  since  the  Time  War,  where  he  would  always  make  sure  she  was  safe.  Jamie,  her  public  name  in  which  he  had  been  the  one  who  return  her  over  who  she  was.  Or  the  Professor,  when,  amusingly,  she  also  had  been  one  with  him  —  over  one  discrete  subject  where  that  place  was  all  about.    ❝  Thank  you  for  the  compliment  in  retrospective.    ❞  He  bounced  back  with  a  laugh.    ❝  Even  if  the  old  man  knows  embellish  beauty  of  a  place,  I’ll  compliment  him  later,  and  I  imagine  he’ll  still  complain  about  recklessness  of  youth.    ❞  He  noticed  her  surprise.  His  previous  self  had  been  sharing  an  speech  on  a  fermentation  of  wine,  and  in  front  of  his  obvious  lack  of  interest  from  so  much  passion,  he  had  invited  him  to  document  himself  —  a  polite  way  to  recognize  his  art.  It  was  only  very  easily  controllable  constraint  he  would  have:  himself.  Naturally,  he  was  only  person  he  couldn’t  stand  in  his  different  degrees.  It  was  an  issue  with  themselves.  An  following  laugh  echoed,  before  smiling  lovingly  towards  the  compliment.    ❝  It’s  for  the  style.    ❞  He  admitted.    ❝  It  makes  me  look  charming  and  adorable.  Although  I  am  flattered  by  the  compliment.  The  serious  man  in  a  suit  and  tie,  with  a  half-pout  expression,  doesn’t  really  make  a  man  on  vacation.    ❞  There  was  another  laugh,  as  he  leaved  out  his  book  for  watching  over  her.  Smiling  even  more  lovingly  as  she  kissed  his  temples,  leaving  a  little  his  book  for  touch  one  of  her  hands  before  been  further  amused.    ❝  He  finds  that  youth  has  a  side  that  is  a  little  too  reckless.  I  was  so  picky  at  that  time.  The  poor  old  man  mustn’t  know  what  it  is  to  have  fun,  I  will  have  to  show  him.  He  gave  me  a  whole  talk  about  fermenting  wine,  and  I  almost  rolled  my  eyes  that  he  invited  me  to  educate  myself.  I’m  a  businessman,  what  I  want  is  for  it  to  work.  It  shouldn’t  be  surprising  if  the  farmer  forgets  this  notion  for  focus  over  details.    ❞  His  amused  smile  inscreased.    ❝  Do  I  look  unhappy  ?  The  first  time  I  came  here,  I  had  a  depressed  expression  that  I  didn’t  imagine  it  could  stop.  What  could  I  complain  about  but  myself  ?    ❞

[dwaginfodder]

Now that we've gotten the ending to the March of the Machines story, I'm deeply curious about someone we didn't see over the course of this set: Glissa. (Spoilers for every part of MoM story under the cut)

We got hints of Glissa during the ONE story, in both Lukka's side story and her own Legends blurb. She's been Vorinclex's voice, following the same "Only the strong will survive"-type motive, organizing the Vicious Swarm while he revels in his ideal purity of strength. They're shown actively fighting in Lukka's story, and appear to be evenly matched. That she didn't appear in any of Elesh Norn's grand summonings of the praetors or the gathering of the compleat planeswalkers is a little suspect to me. She has been shown to be ambitious; that's where the black in her current color identity comes from, not just her reanimation at Phyrexia's talons.

But now the Praetors are (as far as we know, more or less) dead, and Phyrexia is isolated from the rest of the multiverse.

What better time is there for her to continue to gather her strength and place herself at the top of the Phyrexian food chain? Sure, the other Steel Thanes are still presumed to be alive (minus Geth, who was assimilated into Vishgraaz), but otherwise few Phyrexians of note are likely to be able (or willing) to challenge her.

A friend in the Gladiator discord mentioned the possibility of Glissa finding Vorinclex's head, still conscious, and happily finishing him herself as the new strongest creature in the Vicious Swarm. This set me the fuck off and now I wanna write about it but I'm already working on Liliana Strixhaven fanfic and if I add more to my load I might explode. But she's an interesting enough character to me I could end up going off anyway, either from her POV or casting like, Ixhel and the other more independant, freethinking Phyrexians as our protagonists and having Glissa as the rising villainess.

Also I really wanna explore the potential significance of the Sunslayer title in Phyrexian society.

[thebibliomancer]

Essential Avengers: West Coast Avengers #20: Lost in Space-Time, Part Four: In the Meantime, in Between-Time...

May, 1987

THE SANDS OF TIME

That’s a good visual metaphor for this lost in the past plot but not strictly accurate to what happens.

But. It makes a really striking cover. I can’t hate it.

Last times on West Coast Avengers: the West Coast Avengers go to try and recruit Firebird except in a wacky mix-up, she was coming to see them and they both miss each other! Oh and then Dominus, pal of Lucifer, sends the Avengers back in time with a broken time machine.

They end up first in the cowboy times of 1876 where they help Two-Gun Kid, Rawhide Kid, and Ghost Rider or Phantom Rider thwart some gimmicky gang leaders and a giant alien that looks like a totem pole.

Sure, they’re stuck in the past but its a rollicking fun adventure. People like cowboy adventures, right!

Unable to fix the time machine, Wonder Man suggests going all the way back to Ancient Egypt and getting Nice Rama-Tut to fix the machine for them.

While trying a test run of going back to 1776, Ghost Rider clonks Mockingbird and kidnaps her because he’s an obsessed creep.

The West Coast Avengers wind up in 1776 and Mockingbird is carried off by Ghost Rider.

Two-Gun Kid and Rawhide Kid track down Ghost Rider but he’s given Mockingbird a magic potion that makes her love him and she helps him fight off the two Kids.

Back in 1776, the West Coast Avengers wind up fighting some Spanish soldiers and Wonder Man accidentally explodes an armful of guns right next to Hawkeye, badly burning one of his archery arms.

The Avengers meet Carlotta Valdez, a woman that is maybe Firebird/La Espirita’s ancestor and whose death La Espirita had a vision of the first time she was hanging out with the team!

Hawkeye writes a note for her to pass down her family and hopefully eventually reach the Fantastic Four who can come rescue the time-lost team.

Because time is silly like that and coincidences happen more often than not, the inkjet arrowhead Hawkeye used to write the note is found by potioned up Mockingbird in 1876 and taken as a keepsake.

Also, in the present year of 1987, La Espirita interrupted Hank Pym’s suicide and helped him get his groove back.

As you can tell, a lot is going on. Just so much.

Look at this splash page, we’re following four separate threads because in addition to the present, the past, and the further past, we’re still following Carlotta.

Its a nice touch that in issue four, we’ve split the plot into four different threads. But this story arc has a lot of issues. How many plot threads are we going to wind up with before the end??

ANYWAY

July, 1776, and the West Coast Avengers minus Mockingbird are flying towards Egypt.

But that’s a lot of ground to cover and Hawkeye isn’t doing great after being exploded. Carlotta treated his burns with salve but he needs a real doctor.

So they’re taking a detour to the Philadelphia.

Although its not really a detour when their destination is so far away.

Hawkeye reminds everyone that hey it may seem like going to Egypt is their only hope for getting back to their own time but don’t forget! He wrote a note and gave it to a random person who was probably Firebird’s ancestor!

That note will totally get where it needs to go!

Wonder Man: “A message telling her to contact the FF and have them come get us with their time machine! We should go to Brooklyn, and I can sell you a bridge!”

Tigra casually rearranges their flying arrangement so Wonder Man is carrying her on the time platform so she can very casually tell him to stop being a dick.

Wonder Man: “You and I haven’t had much time together lately!”

Tigra: “And we’re gonna have less if you don’t shape up, you turkey!”

Wonder Man: “What -- ?”

Tigra: “Listen -- I know you’re real proud of yourself these days, but you’re still a part of a group! This group! I spent too much time being a pain in the Whackos’ butt to let anybody else start up now! We don’t need this ‘team’s strongest man’ contest you’ve started with Tony, okay?”

Wonder Man: “Then maybe I’ve outgrown the team -- !”

Don’t let the door hit your ass on the way out then?

Look.

I generally like Wonder Man as a concept and sometimes as a person. But he’s been a dick lately. And the team has been stagnant lately. Where’s that patented Avengers dynamic roster?

Wonder Man storming off in a huff and becoming a solo act would be just the ticket.

I crave change!

Anyway.

While the West Coast Avengers are still in July, Carlotta’s part of the plot is one month ahead in August, 1776.

So she can be on her trip to California that La Espirita had a vision of.

She’s riding in the carriage with a priest and with her aunt and complaining how boring it is. She’d rather be riding her horse instead of sitting in the carriage with two fuddy duddies.

Carlotta starts bragging about how she met some flying British spies and treated their wounds but the two chaperones think she’s just making up stories.

So she ditches the carriage to ride her horse like she wanted to and to make time with a handsome captain.

Thennn there’s an attack by first nationers.

Who probably have some grievances but everyone just starts shooting guns so who can say.

Carlotta joins in the shooting because she has a gun so why not but then she gets shot from behind.

In the vision it was a mystery who shot her and here... its also still a mystery who shot her.

I don’t know if we’ll ever learn.

It’s only the Spanish soldiers who have guns and the shot seems to have come from behind her, where the Spanish soldiers would have been.

So was it just friendly fire?

The tragedy of being in the wrong place at the wrong time?

Because her priest and aunt chaperones make it through this just fine. Is the point that if she’d behaved and stayed put, she’d be alive? If so, I’m glad that the book is vague on the subject.

The priest comes to hear her last confession and she first makes him promise to safeguard the note she got from Hawkeye.

So at least that plot thread is still going somewhere, even if Carlotta no longer is.

Sorry, Carlotta. You seemed cool.

A MONTH AGO, in July, 1776, the West Coast Avengers arrive in Philadelphia.

Hawkeye has passed out from his injuries so he really needs a doctor ASAP.

Wonder Man swears that Hawkeye won’t die while the West Coast Avengers are on duty and since Wonder Man has been such a pill lately, Tigra honestly can’t tell if he’s serious or is just being a dick again using his ACTING to pretend to care.

While Tigra watches Hawkeye in an alley, Iron Man and Wonder Man go to find the doctor.

They have to steal clothes because their money is not legal tender yet and also they really don’t blend in with their ridiculous clothes and awesome power armor.

Wonder Man, still being a pill: “Once you take that armor off, you’re just a normal guy, aren’t you?”

Tony Stark, Iron Man: “I can put it back on at a moment’s notice!”

Normal guy but also genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist.

Stop starting shit, Simon.

Anyway, big nerd Tony Stark nerds out about being in Philadelphia in July, 1776 while Simon Williams, only a big nerd about science, really doesn’t give a crap. He even tells Tony “I studied science, not history!”

But Tony is really excited and a little disappointed that this isn’t a sightseeing trip. He wants to watch all this history being made! But Hawkeye is dying so dangit I guess we got priorities.

And as Tony and Simon walk off to find a doctor for Hawkeye, they miss Dr Strange, Clea, and Evil Sorcerer Disguised As Benjamin Franklin walking around the corner.

Womp womp!

They coulda gotten home without a trip to Egypt.

Also: Dr Strange is a doctor!

(Side note: Aside from Dr Strange and Clea being in 1776, Captain America is also apparently in town accidentally inspiring the American flag in a bootstrap paradox. The marvel wiki wryly notes “It's probably safe to assume Philadelphia in July, 1776 was just lousy with visiting time travelers.”)

ANYWAY

One hundred years in the future, 1876, Ghost Rider arrives in Lordsburg, New Mexico with his new potioned girlfriend slash coerced captive Mockingbird.

Lordsburg is where Ghost Rider’s secret identity Lincoln Slade is a marshal.

Ghost Rider aka Lincoln Slade doesn’t think Two-Gun and Rawhide Kids will give up on hunting him but he also doesn’t think they’ll be able to find him once he and Mockingbird decostume and move into town.

When Lincoln takes off his spooky outfit, he actually briefly feels bad about drugging a woman to love him but then thinks ‘don’t I deserve happiness too??’ and puts it out of mind.

So he goes and interacts with what are probably a supporting cast from his old book maybe. He buys a dress for Mockingbird to wear (she didn’t exactly bring a change of clothes) and sneaks her into his room in the marshal’s station.

Mockingbobbi boots Lincoln out of the room so she can change into her new Old West dress and contemplates the inkjet arrowhead that she found.

She has no idea what it is but it fascinates it does. So she decides to wear it as a necklace.

Which - after he finishes drooling over her in her new dress - does Lincoln a startle. Because it looks like a Hawkeye arrowhead but that’s clearly impossible! Hawkeye was never in Ghost Rider’s secret cave, as far as Ghost Rider knows!

So he shakes off his paranoia and goes to introduce Bobbi around town.

BACK ONE HUNDRED YEARS AGO in 1776, the West Coast Avengers minus Mockingbird jet over the Atlantic.

Hawkeye’s off-panel doctoring has left him feeling much better, although not a whole lot better.

Simon used his UNHOLY ACTING TALENT to convince the off-panel doctor that Hawkeye’s garish getup was a circus. Helped by the fact that well his original costume was based on a circus outfit so it wasn’t actually much of a lie.

The West Coast Avengers have apparently made good time because after some hours of travel, they’re approaching England.

Hm. Hey. Wonder Man doesn’t actually fly under his own power. He has a little jetpack or whatever.

Does it have infinite fuel or something? I looked on the wiki and it apparently has enough fuel for five hours of continuous flight. So this trip across the Atlantic could fall within that time frame.

But what is it fueled with that they could find to refuel it with in 1776? Because the team also flew from the pre-American Southwest to the East Coast.

Ah well. These kinds of logistics are probably why Simon eventually became capable of self-propulsion.

The concept of England reminds Iron Man of magicians. A magician (LIKE DR STRANGE FOR EXAMPLE??) could send them back to the present easily enough.

Usually Iron Man doesn’t like magic. Or maybe that’s more of a modern thing that has become a retroactive thing. But in either case, he’s willing to try it out.

Because: for example: Merlin in King Arthur’s time.

Pretty famous wizard. And a time frame that isn’t as far back as Ancient Egypt so at least they have a fallback.

Hawkeye protests that in the Marvel universe, there are several people that call themselves Merlin and some of them are liable to be good and friendly and many are not.

Heck, a recent Black Knight miniseries has revealed that Camelot Merlin was himself kind of a massive asshole.

So, maybe a bigger gamble than the West Coast Avengers would like.

Tigra suggests Prester John, the guy with the Evil Eye that caused the Avengers/Defenders War.

But Hawkeye again partypoops and points out that Prester John wasn’t a time traveler. He just lived a super long time because he had a special chair.

Okay so all the options that anybody can think of besides going to Egypt have been shot down? Lets go to Egypt!

I’m glad that they at least tried to think of different options though.

Maybe the Avengers should have a ‘So You’re Trapped in the Past’ class about various time travelers to look out for. They could have gone to the point when the Thing was Blackbeard, for example.

That’s only sixty some years before where they are now. It’s doable.

You guys have gotta learn more about what your friends the Fantastic Four are up to.

In fact, if the first trip hadn’t taken you so far back, you could have gone to World War II and waited for future past Captain America to show up to watch Bucky die, for closure reasons.

And apparently the Stone Age is just lousy with time travelers.

The Marvel Universe is a silly place.

Anyway, Egypt.

Back in the present times of 1987, Hank and La Espirita have started to wonder where the Avengers are.

Hank is worried because they went looking for her but she’s here so what’s keeping them from returning having not found her?

But La Espirita isn’t worried because “nobody’s ever beaten the Avengers! That’s why I admire them so!”

But she suggests praying for them if Hank is worried.

And while she’s showing off her family Bible, Hawkeye’s note from the past times drops out and she shoves it back in without looking.

Dangit, Bonita!

Also, Hank, singular scientist that he is, doesn’t really believe that prayer does shit.

So he declines, as politely as he can bother, and La Espirita shrugs and moves back on with her Help Hank project by poking another sore spot in his personality.

Now that Hank’s explained everything about Pym Particles, she asks him about his experience in robotics. And specifically Ultron.

Y’know, it’s a good thing Bonita is good. Because this would be the perfect cover for someone who wanted all of Hank’s secrets and technology.

He’s practically giving it away.

Anyway: Ultron.

Hank Pym: “I devised an artificial intelligence system based on the android known as Dragon Man -- but I accidentally went too far, and gave it enough self-reference to achieve self-awareness! it began to evolve itself without my knowledge -- rebuilding itself without my help -- Do you really have some idea where you’re going with this?”

La Espirita: “I’m just letting the spirit move me, but I’m beginning to see a brilliant shining goal -- ! Tell me more -- !”

It’s kind of funny that Hank’s biggest failure was caused by him succeeding too much.

Like, his big insecurity that often drives him is that he doesn’t measure up to the other prominent Marvel scientists. But he tried to create just a test artificial intelligence and accidentally made one self-aware.

Granted, it’ll turn out that’s at least partially because he jammed his own brain into there but still.

Maybe Hank’s failure in the lab since was a subconscious fear of what new horrors he would wrought if he stretched his genius to its limit. So he self-sabotages and half-asses and then gets frustrated with himself for not making anything good.

I dunno.

BACK IN 1776, the West Coast Avengers arrive in Egypt and land by the Sphinx.

Which is just stone but still seems annoyed with them somehow.

Maybe it was that crack about Bakersfield.

Despite traveling all day, Hawkeye wants them to press on until they’re back in the present.

Then, while Wonder Man sets up the time platform for the big trip to 3000 BC, a group of pissed off Egyptians attack the weirdo outsiders who just flew into town because we gotta get an action scene into here.

It’s just been talking.

Sure, having them shout about flying infidels before attacking is probably racist but uh... yeah its not great.

The very brief fight scene choreography is a little great. Or passable, at least.

Iron Man grabs what looks like half the crowd at the same time to just gently shove them away.

The physics of that astound me.

Tigra nimbly traverses the crowd by head and shoulder, the way a cat might.

While Hawkeye can’t fire his bow with one arm in a sling but he can just use a gas arrow by waving it around while holding his breath.

With enough time bought during the entirely pointless one page fight scene with a bunch of bystanders who were very angry at the Avengers who didn’t really try very hard not to upset the locals, Wonder Man finishes programming the time platform and AWAY THEY GO

To 2920 BC

Where they land near a crowd of locals so they can get into another pointless fight scene.

This time they’re mistaken as demons.

But c’mon. At least confuse Tigra for a servant of Sekhmet or something.

A priest calls an end to all these shenanigans because dammit, is he the only one who remembers Ancient Egyptian history??

Shamaz, high priest of the Pharaoh: “<These aren’t the first strange men and women to appear on the flying square! Many years ago, the four in blue came the same way!>”

And then he starts speaking to the West Coast Avengers in modern English.

A language that he definitely knows despite it very not existing yet. Not even being a linguistic glimmer in someone’s eye.

Somehow, I want to blame the Fantastic Four for this but Kang would definitely demand his high priest learn English, right?

Hawkeye is not doing well at this point. He’s jetlagged from crossing the ocean and now he’s time lagged and his burns are getting to him again. He’s sweating really bad and he can barely stumble through a sentence.

But he tells the high priest that he needs to speak to Pharaoh Rama-Tut to get their time machine fixed.

That’s quite impossible though because according to Shamaz, Rama-Tut is preparing to enter suspended animation so he can wake up in time for the Celestial Madonna Saga.

Plus, Shamaz points out that Rama-Tut might not even be able to fix a time machine. He destroyed his own time machine and if he could have a new one built, he wouldn’t take the long way to the present.

Iron Man: “We must speak to Rama-Tut directly! This is extremely serious!”

Shamaz: “So are the burial rites of Pharaoahs!”

Wonder Man: “How’d you like to get buried yourself, tough guy! I’ll put you a good mile underground if you don’t quit screwin’ around here!”

And he flies up and puts the guy in an armlock.

You’d think this would restart hostilities but apparently one of these people flying off the handle and threatening him with violence convinces Shamaz that they really are the people that Rama-Tut is going to aid in the relative future.

... Rama-Tut, what the hell have you been telling your high priest?

Honestly, Shamaz is kind of fascinating. He’s got a good head on his shoulders. And he knows enough to just sigh and go ‘these assholes again’ when time traveling superheroes show up instead of thinking its demons.

Anyway. He directs them where to find Rama-Tut.

Unfortunately for the West Coast Avengers, Shamaz was entirely correct that Rama-Tut is in no state to help randos right now.

In preparation for sleeping for thousands of years... uh... Rama-Tut is in that half-asleep state where he’s almost entirely but not quite incoherent.

He’s going to be no help.

Once when I was half asleep like this, I promised myself I could sleep another hour because I’d just use my time machine to make up the time. Unlike the various Kangses, I didn’t actually have one. But it seemed very convincing when I needed to persuade my brain to go back to sleep.

Anyway.

Hawkeye starts shouting at this point because dangit, they’ve come all this way and all this time and in the future Hawkeye will help out Rama-Tut so Rama-Tut can damn well help him now in the past!

In his not-quite-lucid state, Rama-Tut suggests that “...go... to... my first reign... knew... machines... then...!”

Which is not helpful, actually!

In Rama-Tut’s first reign, he was very Kangy. I.e. a dick. And a creep. He tried to enslave the Fantastic Four and he’ll probably definitely not be disposed to help out some poor mixed up time travelers.

Iron Man suggests that the (West Coast) Avengers will do whatever Hawkeye wants them to do but Hawkeye’s about done.

Hawkeye: “I’ve been -- kiddin’ us all! I’m about -- out of -- it! You have to -- decide -- this time -- knowing -- it’ll be -- the three of -- you -- fightin’ alone! I can’t -- help -- any -- more -- !”

Iron Man: “Nor need you!”

Wonder Man: “You molded us into a team that can take care of itself, and you!”

Tigra: “Simon and I were misfits before! We owe you far more than a free ride now!”

Iron Man: “We’ll go to the younger Rama-Tut and we’ll get Bobbi and we’ll go home! That’s a promise from Iron Man!”

Hawkeye: “Th -- thanks -- !”

Right before Hawkeye passes out - because yeah he almost immediately passes out after this - he names Iron Man interim chairman.

To some upset.

Mostly Simon.

Simon’s upset.

He’s been angling to replace Hawkeye. Or at least he mentioned once that maybe Hawkeye was too emotionally and physically compromised and maybe Wonder Man should take over.

And he’s been grumpy about Iron Man also.

So now he’s doubly grumpy. Angry even. Shouting.

And I can think of several good reasons why Hawkeye chose Iron Man. Seniority. Already experienced as a leader. Didn’t explode the previous leader.

But Iron Man just goes with ‘he said what he said so live with it.’

So they say goodbye to cool guy Shamaz and head back in time again.

Just twenty more years back, to 2940 BC.

So.

Uh. Why did they do this?

I know Nice Rama-Tut suggested it. But he’s spouting half-asleep nonsense.

If the problem is that he’s too sleepy to help, why not go back a couple days? Instead of taking a chance on Mean Rama-Tut?

Why did nobody suggest this?

The issue was so good at throwing out ideas only to dismiss them earlier. It could at least dismiss going to talk to Nice Rama-Tut earlier as being too likely to Change Time Oh No since Shamaz didn’t know them already.

That’d be something.

Anyway.

When the West Coast Avengers show up in 2940 BC, Mean Rama-Tut immediately shoots them.

Womp womp!

Follow @essential-avengers​ for more nitpicking bad decision making. I’m assuming there will be more of it. Like and reblog perhaps.

[what-if-nct]

i think i'm on my man period and i feel sad. i didn't even think we would also have it too (minus the red part of course) and now i feel bad...

my siblings are so mean they're laughing at me while i suffer in my misery. i hate them so much. i want chocolate. no, a milkshake. i want the ones with whipped cream and a cherry on top. i'll ask my boyfriend to make it for me. then, i will watch him as he is cooking me food in the kitchen because he does so many wonderful things with his hands. that way i'll calm down and cuddle with him afterwards.

awhhh i want cuddles now. fuck this shit, we're getting mcdonalds instead. i don't know if it's available where you live but there's this mango and pineapple smoothie and it's SOOOO NICE. if it's not there where you live, then you HAVE to try it when you come to the UK one day. i drink that shit every single day you don't understandddd

I do remember hearing there is a male equivalent of pms. I'm actually like in days away from my period, she gave me the signals I know she's on the way but I never know what day I have a date today so I'm hoping it's not today. I think male pms is just fluctuation of hormones. And you'd probably experience similar symptoms to women. Like fatigue, cravings, and mood changes. But obviously not the pain, sore nipples, bloating and the weird things going on in the body. Did you know ovulation starts with a cyst that explodes. That explains that sharp shooting pain followed by being in heat like a damn cat. But it's just your hormones fluctuating and should end soon. But yeah just eat all of your favorite foods and you'll be okay. And we do have a mango pineapple smoothie, there's also Strawberry, But I don't like smoothies so I never tried it, It's just the worst texture to me. The texture is what destroys food for me even if it tastes good. It has to be the right texture. But we also have slushies there's a pink lemonade slushie that I love when they have it.

[kurt-wagner-official]

Post #20: UXM issues 145-147

Dave Cockrum is back for a Doctor Doom arc! It starts with Ororo and Stevie, who Ororo is still jealous of, being attacked by Miss Locke, Arcade's assistant, who tells them they need to save her boss from Doctor Doom. To ensure their cooperation, she's taken hostages of their loved ones in Murderworld. Logan wants to kill Locke and save the hostages to show the world the X-Men can't be blackmailed and their families can't be targeted, but Ororo has a plan. She'll lead the X-Men (minus Kitty, who has the flu) to save Arcade while some of their allies head into Murderworld. Xavier recruits Alex, Lorna, Bobby, and Sean, but is unable to reach Scott due to mysterious shifts in the Earth's magnetic poles, which for sciency reasons messes with his telepathic messages. Speak of the devil, Scott and Lee were thrown overboard in a storm last night and find themselves on a remote island. Scott, without his glasses, makes a blindfold to keep his eyes shut as the two set off in search of help. Ororo arrives at Doom's castle seeking an audience, and he invites her to dinner. Although they're natural enemies, they are in a way drawn to each other. They're two of the most powerful people on the planet, both natural rulers and leaders, separated by morality. Ororo is one of the few people Doon respects. She's trying to distract Doom while her team rescues Arcade, but they realize too late that it's a trap and Arcade is working with Doom, who turns Ororo into a living statue and captures the team. Part two of the story starts with the X-Men imprisoned by Doom. They're all in individual death traps that have one way out, because Doom is arrogant and curious about their capabilities. Ororo, however, is still trapped inside a statue, and Doom, not knowing about her claustrophobia, doesn't know this is the worst thing he could have possibly done to her. Her subconscious is summoning a storm felt across the world, including Scott and Lee's island in the East Indies, where an explosion from a lightning bolt shocks Scott's eyes open, revealing his power. Back in New York, the other team locates and infiltrates Murderworld, but they're quickly detected and sent into death traps of their own. Alex is the first to escape, and starts making his way through utility tunnels and sabotaging everything he can. Sean finds himself in a trolley problem and chooses Moira over Amanda and Candy, but before he can go through with it, everyone is saved by Lorna and Bobby. They discover the hostages they've found are exploding robots, the real ones still with Miss Locke. Alex has reached the control room and disarms Murderworld, saving his team and the hostages. Back at Doom's, the storm is worse than ever, and Kurt- who's trap was a featureless box- has disappeared. Kurt's escape was a gamble. He had to assume he was still in Doom's castle, which doesn't extend far underground, so he teleported straight up two miles, his maximum vertical range. He found himself in the middle of the storm, but luckily he's had plenty of skydiving experience, so he's able to land in a lake and make his way back to infiltrate the castle. Meanwhile, Peter's trap is a slowly disintegrating rock in a whirlpool, with lasers in the water targeting large rock chunks. As Colossus, he doesn't need to breath, but the lasers may harm him. In human form, he can slip by, but might drown. He's able to hold his breath long enough to get out of range before changing form and punching his way out. Warren is in the center of a laser maze, which he flies through. Logan is trapped inside a kaleidoscope assaulting his senses and driving him insane, but thinking back to Jimmy and Heather helping him control his rage gives him the strength to forget his senses and use his brain to slash open a wall and escape. He goes to save Ororo, destroying a robot version of her that doesn't have her scent, before he and Kurt take down Doon and force him to free Ororo. But as soon as she's free, the trauma combined with the huge storm she's subconsciously unleashed makes her loose control in a way that reminds her friends of Jean. Peter arrives and pleads her not to go the same route as Phoenix, and the mention shocks Ororo back into control. She flies out to try and undo her damage, and though she's tempted by the power, she succeeds where Jean failed at first. In a rare move, Doom apologizes to Ororo, one of the only people he respects, and she agreed to leave with Arcade on neutral terms. On the final page, Lee is shocked to see a huge metal island that wasn't there before. This arc feels like Claremont was really excited to have Cockrum back and wanted to give him as many characters to draw as he could. Unless I'm forgetting something, this is the only time Bobby has a major guest appearance in the book before the X-Factor crossovers. I'm not sure why; Hank had a lot of appearances a few years ago, and continues to show up on video call sometimes, including this arc, Warren's on the team now, and Alex and Lorna will be really important after the Massacre storyline. But Claremont just seems to not be a fan of Bobby. It's nice to see Doom in an X-Men story. Pretty much everyone in the universe fights Doom from time to time, but the X-Men have surprisingly few encounters with him. The X-Men in general have a rogues gallery that's pretty separated from the rest of the world. I do really like that their mythology is more self contained than, say, the Avengers and Fantastic Four, but at the same time it's fun to see heroes fighting other people's villains sometimes, and the X-Men don't get to do it as much as everyone else.