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megalony · 3 years

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Stay with me

This is a Dominic Carisi imagine from Law and Order SVU which was requested by the lovely @misguidedswagger I hope this is what you were wanting. Feedback is always lovely.

Taglist: @lunaticspoem @butlegendsneverdie @langdonzvoid @jennyggggrrr @rogmeddows @radiob-l-a-hblah @rogertaylorsbitontheside @chlobo6 @rogertaylors-lipgloss @sj-thefan @omgitsearly @luckytrashgooprebel @scarsout @deaky-with-a-c @killer-queen-ofrhye @bluutac @vousmemanqueez-blog @jonesyaddiction @ambi-and-sunflowers @milanosaurus @httpfandxms @saint-hardy @7-seas-of-fat-bottomed-girls @mrsalwayswritex @rogerina-owns-me @hellsdragon @im-an-adult-ish @crazylittlethingg @allauraleigh @onceuponadetectivedemigod @ceres27 @avyannadawn

Masterlist

Summary: Whilst working on a new case, Carisi finds out that it’s his girlfriend who is the victim they are trying to save and he has to find her and make sure she’s okay. He can’t live without her.

Enjoy.

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"Okay, we've got another kidnap on our hands." Olivia looked round the team all crowded in the command room. All of their shifts had only started that of an hour or so ago and they were jumping right in the deep end again.

Their eyes were all tired and caffine wasn't waking them up yet but they all knew they had to be ready and alert for this shift. For the past week, there had been a serial rapist patrolling the streets early morning and late at night, picking random victims off the street. This guy wasn't murdering his victims but he was leaving them on death's door when he was finished with them and if he escalated, the next victim might not make it through.

"When did it happen?" Dom rubbed his hand over his eyes to liven himself up a bit.

The double shifts were taking a toll on him, especially when they just seemed to be getting somewhere and then he takes another victim like this, putting them back at the start.

"Two hours ago, it's the same MO. He grabbed her on a quiet side street where there were no security cameras and bundled her into a dark green jeep. Only one witness saw what happened from a distance but the girl has the same eye and hair colour and height as the other victims so he clearly has a type. We need to find her fast."

Amanda couldn't quite place what it was, but there was something about Olivia right now that looked off. It was like there was something she was worried about or holding back from the rest of them, something she knew that she wasn't willing to share with the rest of them. Whatever it was, it was clearly playing on her mind because there was a distracted look on her face and her eyes were drifting somewhere else.

"Let's go talk to the witness and canvas the streets, see if anyone else saw something or knows anything." Dom hooked his badge onto the top of his trousers and his belt under the hidden sight of his jacket.

They needed to talk to the witness and make sure there were no details that they had forgotten or suddenly remembered. And they needed to find any other witness and see where this guy was taking his victims, this was the first proper witness they had other than a camera catching the edge of his jeep or a shop owner hearing a scuffle.

"No- Carisi I want you to collect all security tapes nearby and find this jeep, Rollins can talk to the witness and Fin you and me will talk to the other victims."

Dom looked over at Amanda, his jaw dropped and his brows furrowed as he placed his hands on his hips. What had he done? Why was he suddenly stuck on tape duty which meant he would mostly be stuck here in the office rather than going out canvasing the streets. Why had Olivia just shot him down so quickly like that?

"Go." Olivia waved her hand at the team, watching them all disappear before Fin approached her with a look of caution in his eyes.

"What was that about?" Fin put his hands in his pockets, looking at his friend with a knowing look. He knew when something was wrong with her and he could tell there was something that was playing on her mind and it was upsetting or worrying her. This was never a good sign.

Olivia ticked her head to the side signalling for Fin to follow her into her office. Going over to her desk, Olivia sorted through a few files and pieces of paper on her desk before she found the one she was looking for. Her eyes quickly scanned around the command room once again, just to make sure that no one else was listening or paying attention before she handed the piece of paper to Fin.

"The victim's ID was found on the floor after she was taken, she probably managed to leave it behind before he got her in the jeep."

It wasn't uncommon for some victims to manage to leave their phone or ID or a credit card behind when they were in a struggle. They could manage to drop it on the floor or out their bag or just leave some kind of calling card behind to make it easier to identify and find them. It was always a smart move to make and they had found the ID which made Fin wonder why Olivia hadn't told the rest of the team that they knew the victims name and address.

"Okay... so why not tell us her name, why aren't we checking out her place right now?"

"Because it's Carisi's girlfriend who's been taken."

Fin rubbed his hand over is mouth and jaw as he tried to think of the best way to handle this situation. He knew what Olivia was thinking, if they told Carisi he wouldn't be able to work the case because he was emotionally involved and invested. And it would be horrible for him to be at work trying to find his girlfriend whilst wondering what was happening to her and if she was alive or not.

By not telling him it bought them some time to do this by the book and try to find her and keeping Carisi on desk duty meant he could still work the case but wasn't too involved or at risk of ruining the case to find (Y/n).

They couldn't tell him.

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Leaning back in his chair, Dom tipped his head back and rubbed his hands over his face, feeling a headache forming behind his eyes. They were no closer to finding out where the latest victim was and tie was ticking on, they knew how this guy operated. Within twenty four hours he would rape and beat them to a pulp then dump them somewhere where they weren't likely to be found for a few hours.

This was his fourth victim, they thought that they would be more prepared for his next victim and able to catch him quickly but they were running out of time.

Not to mention that Dom didn't feel he was doing very much right now, he felt like he was doing the bare minimum amount of work on this case when he wanted to be scouting out where this villain was hiding and hurting all these women.

So far all Dom had done was go through hours worth of security tapes and get the number plate for the jeep. It didn't help that the jeep had been reported stolen around the time of the first attack so they were working backwards and trying to find the guy through other tapes and records.

He was done with this, sitting in this office going through tapes wasn't going to get them very far, just like Olivia had said not to focus too much on finding her identity because that wouldn't help either. This girl hadn't been taken because of her identity, she was taken because she fitted the rapist's victim profile so knowing who she was wouldn't help them find her.

Getting to his feet, Dom walked over to Olivia's office, he needed to go out into the world and do something about this case and try to make a difference and find this girl.

Peeking his head round the door, Dom felt his chest deflating at the sight of no one in the office. Olivia must be on some sort of lead, she must have found something or other or maybe she was just out for something to eat or even the toilet. Either way, Dom didn't want to hang around here doing nothing, he needed to head out.

If she wasn't here, maybe he could see if she had any leads he could follow up on.

Gingerly walking into the office, Dom looked over the various papers and files scattered over Olivia's desk like a large spreadsheet. He lightly brushed his fingers over them and pushed a few out the way to try and find something substantial.

His eyes glued to a map on the right side of the desk that looked familiar, it was a map of the city with different coloured paths drawn on, it showed each victims route from where they started to where they got snatched. Olivia was trying to find where they all linked to, an area of the city that was familiar to show where the perp liked to stick to.

The newest line on the map was the light blue one showing this victim's journey early this morning. Following the line, Dom looked where it seemed familiar to the other routes but his eyes narrowed and his blood ran cold when he noticed where the victim's journey started.

That was his apartment block.

No, no it couldn't be.

No, there were plenty of people in his apartment block, the chances of this victim being Dom's (Y/n) were one in thirty, that was a low chance. There were other women in their block, it wasn't just (Y/n).

But then again, it would explain why Olivia seemed to want Dom to stay in here and not be as involved in his case as he was in the others.

No, he had seen (Y/n) this morning, he had kissed her goodbye when she left half an hour earlier than he did for work.

But (Y/n) didn't drive to work, she walked since it was a twenty minute walk and within close distance to their home. And if it was her who had been taken, it would add up with the timeline of when the victim had been snatched this morning and then the team finding out and being on the case.

Dom felt rage and panic fluttering through his blood and nerves making him shake as he started to throw papers on the floor and scatter them around the desk looking for something concrete to cement his worries. He had to know if this was his girl or not, he needed to know if he had to go on a rampage in order to find his girl and make sure she was okay or if he could relax and know that this victim wasn't someone close to home for him.

He grabbed his phone out his back pocket and dialled (Y/n)'s number as he looked through the pages, Dom needed reassurance.

The phone dropped from his hand as his chest started to hurt. He was wheezing, unable to take in a proper breath, feeling his face burning up and his body on fire with the lack of oxygen when his eyes found a single piece of paper with a photo ID enlarged on it.

(Y/n)'s drivers license.

The loudest, longest scream Dom had ever done left his bright red lips in a flurry as he slammed his fist down on the desk causing everything in the room to vibrate.

No, no no!

He had to go and find her, he had to get her back safely before anything happened to her. Dom wouldn't be able to forgive himself if (Y/n) was the one victim that didn't make it since the perp was escalating. He wouldn't know what to do if they didn't get to her in time and she was hurt and beaten and suffering because they hadn't managed to catch this guy sooner.

In a haste, Dom grabbed his phone from the floor before he charged out the office. He wasn't wasting another second in here, all morning he could have been out there searching the streets for (Y/n) but instead he was here being utterly useless.

He wasn't going to carry on like this, he was going to save his girl and get her back.

He skidded round the left corner and made his way to the elevator, banging his fist on the button so many times he was sure it would be broken by now but he needed to move quickly. The moment the doors opened he was over the threshold and inside the lift, his eyes widening when he almost knocked over Amanda in his haste.

"Hey- you okay Carisi?" He barely managed to nod in response but Amanda could tell by looking at him that something was wrong. "I was looking for Liv, I found a lead and I think I know where he's hiding out."

"She's gone on a separate lead, come on I'll go with you. We can call her on the way."

Amanda narrowed her eyes at Dom before she nodded and stepped back inside the lift with him. He was jittery, his face was blotched red and every muscle in his body was tight and tense from adrenaline and anger. Something had rattled and upset him but she couldn't prod if he wasn't ready to talk about it.

Their case was more important right now.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"This better be the right place, I can't risk wasting anymore time on tapes and false leads, I gotta find him now."

Dom half muttered, half growled the words through gritted teeth before he ticked his head side to side like he was telling both himself and Amanda off. His movements were fast and reckless as he yanked the bullet-proof vest over his shoulders and zipped it up tight so that he would be protected. He had his badge on his hip as usual and his gun resting in his holster that would soon be in his hand.

If this was the right location then he could storm in and get (Y/n) out of there before this got any worse. But if it was a false alarm then they would be wasting precious time and (Y/n) could be hurt or even dead by the time they got to her.

"Carisi calm down, this is the place and even if he's moved her we'll find them." Amands rested her hand on Dom's shoulder for a second to try and calm him down before she pressed her phone to her ear and placed her hand back on her hip.

"What are you doing, we don't have time to call anyone we gotta get in there!"

"I'm calling Liv, if we go in here and it's him we're gonna need a bus and backup and they need to know where we are in case this goes up in smoke- Carisi just one minute, okay, I promise then we'll storm in there and find them... what's gotten to you about this case?"

Amanda narrowed her eyes at Dom and shook her head in confusion. This morning he had been miffed about being stuck on scanning through tapes but he hadn't been tense or panicked or over-worried about this case like he was now. Something had gotten to him and it was making him tense and on edge.

"No- Carisi wait- Liv he's going in-" Amanda reached her hand out but she wasn't quick enough to catch Dom before he bolted down the stairs leading to the lower basement apartment, gun in hand.

"His girlfriend's the victim, get in there with him now!"

Amanda needed no more explanations than that for her to shove her phone in her back pocket and run down the stairs whilst fumbling to get her gun out from her holster. If it was Dom's girlfriend who was the victim then he was likely to shoot or attack the perp for what he had done. And if the victim was in a bad shape then Dom would lose all control, the perp could end up walking free by a case of police brutality if Dom lost his control down there.

Dom wasn't in control.

The moment he barged his way through the door and started roaming through the apartment, he was giving himself up to his darker side that was controlled by his anger and resentment.

When his eyes found the perp looming over his girl who was laid out on a dirty mattress on the floor, Dom saw red. He didn't give the perp chance to explain, to try and bargain or threaten him at all, The moment the man turned around with a knife in hand, Dom's gun fired and sent a bullet into the perp's shoulder.

When he landed on the floor on his back, Dom lunged like a predator attacking and devouring its prey.

His gun smashed into the perp's nose, his cheekbone, a knee flew into his stomach and his fingers latched into the man's hair and slammed his head down onto the concrete floor to give him a substantial concussion.

Amanda's shouting of his name brought him back to the reality that he was spending time attacking the perp when he should be checking on his girl and seeing what damage had been done to her and if she was okay. With that thought in mind, Dom heaved himself to his feet, using his foot to roll the perp a distance away before he headed over to (Y/n).

There she was, on a mattress pushed up into the corner of the cold damp room with no windows and only one small stream of light from the bulb in the ceiling.

(Y/n)'s hair was tangled and clumped around her face and spread out over the mattress. Her hands were bound together at the wrists wwith metal wire that had cut into her skin caqusing it to chafe and bleed. There were cuts and forming bruises on her cheekbone and lips, her white button-up top she had been wearing this morning was tattered and ripped apart, clinging to her shoulders by a few threads.

There were rips and cuts in her trousers thay were unbuttoned and unzipped but hadn't been pulled down very far. By the looks of her, she had been beaten to a pulp but the perp hadn't managed to get as far as he wanted with her like he did with the other victims.

"Baby, hey baby it's me... can you open your eyes for me? Baby don't sleep on me now."

Dom gently cupped (Y/n)'s face in his hands as he knelt down beside her, trying to get her to wake and focus on him. Her eyes were moving behind her eyelids and a small murmur left her lips but she wasn't fully coming round like Dom wanted her to. He needed her to wake up so he could check on her because she was either unconscious because of the beating she had taken or because he had drugged her with something.

"Rollins get that bus here now!"

He smoothed his thumb over her cut open cheekbone, hoping the light touch would stimulate her into waking up but all (Y/n) did was let out a low moan, she still couldn't open her eyes or even move her body.

"Stay with me baby, stay with me."

Those were the only words Dom could muster as he sat next to (Y/n) in the ambulance, watching her little movements and jerks which told him she was trying her best to stay awake and be with him. He had watched the paramedics cut the metal wire with sharp clippers and free her wrists which immediately started to bleed and show her hands had been constricted of blood flow with how discoloured they were.

An oxygen mask was placed over her lips and nose which he was told would help if she had been drugged and bandages were on her wrists to keep them clean and stem the bleeding until a nurse or doctor could patch her up at the hospital.

Dom followed her all the way inside and through the corridors, holding her very weak hand until he was forced to wait outside the room, finding Amanda and Olivia hustling over to him.

They knew better than to dare ask him any questions or tell him off for how he acted. They couldn't preach to him right now and the chief wouldn't dare get involved and take his statement right now. As of this moment Dom was off the job and he was here as (Y/n)'s partner. He wouldn't want to answer any questions or talk to anyone until he knew (Y/n) was alright.

The two women stayed with him, mostly staying silent except for the odd phone call they had to take. They watched their friend stare through the window, keeping an eye on (Y/n) and how she was doing.

He watched them patch up her wrists and take blood samples and cut the rest of her shredded clothing so they could check for anymore injuries.

"Carisi, why don't you go home and get a shower, get changed? Try and clear your head before you come back and wait to see her." Olivia rubbed her hand up and down Dom's back, knowing that right now he was too focused on (Y/n) to argue the fact that he hadn't been informed from the start that his girlfriend was the victim.

"No, I- I can't leave her."

"They won't let you see her for a couple of hours yet, they need to do tests and flush her system and get her stable. Come on, I'll give you a lift then bring you straight back here."

Amanda leaned her head to the side with a small, enticing smile on her lips which seemed to calm Dom down and bring him to the reality that he was going to be waiting in limbo for a while yet. The least he could do was go home and clean up so he looked a bit better for when (Y/n) would see him.

"Okay, let's go."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

All Dom could feel and concentrate on was the feeling of the small square box resting on his coat pocket.

He wanted to be with (Y/n), he wanted to sit next to her and wait for her to wake up and tell her that he couldn't go through this again. He couldn't stomach or live through the pain of wondering if he was going to find her dead or alive, if she was going to be battered and bruised. He didn't want to risk ever being too late to help or save her again like he had today.

Dom knew in his heart that the pain he had gone through proved that he loved (Y/n) more than he ever loved anyone else and he wasn't going to lose or let her go.

His eyes glanced over to Amanda walking beside him before his sight found Olivia sat down in the waiting area she said she would be in. But when the pair got closer to her, they could see the worry in her eyes and whenever Olivia started to rub and scratch her hands like that it meant she was scared.

"What happened?"

"They, um... they said she stopped breathing and her vitals were dropping so they took her for immediate surgery. They think she had an internal haemorrhage and they need to pump her stomach to get rid of the drugs she was given."

Sonny couldn't breathe.

Why did he go? Why didn't he trust his instincts that something would happen if he left? He should have stayed because he was again at risk of losing (Y/n) and this time there was nothing he could do to save her. He had to wait for someone else to help her this time and Dom hated that, he hated how helpless and useless he felt.

She had to pull through, she had to for Dom.

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"Dom..."

That one word caused a shockwave to burst through Dom's system and made him shoot up from where he had previously been slumped over leaning on the hospital bed. It took his eyes a moment to adjust to the brightness of the room since he had suddenly had a power nap against his own will. But when he focused around him, he couldn't help but smile in utter relief when his eyes locked with (Y/n)'s.

She looked as drowsy as he had ever seen her, no focus in her beautiful eyes that were dilated and wide. It took a while for her eyes to finally focus and stop on Dom but when they did they found a smile mixed with tears. And there was a subtle shaking in her system but it was only to be expected after what she had been through.

"I'm here... oh baby you're finally awake, thank God." Dom tightened his hand around (Y/n)'s which he hadn't let go of since he'd been allowed in the room with her about two hours ago.

"I... you, you found me..." (Y/n)'s word were slightly slurred but it was easy for Dom to make out what she was saying.

Her head was splitting like someone was cracking it open like a coconut and her memories were fuzzy and al out of place. But the one thing she could really remember and focus on was Dom's voice in her head, telling her to open her eyes and stay with him. She could still feel his arms around her, holding her, cradling her, placing her on the gurney, holding her hand all the time until she fell unconscious.

"I did baby... I should have found you sooner, I'm so sorry. I wish I could have stopped it right when he got you but I couldn't-" Dom cut himself off as he brushed the back of his hand under his eyes to move the tears he was shedding. All the 'what ifs' were rolling through his head until all he could think about was how he had been very late in saving her.

"You saved me, I couldn't be more proud of my detective." (Y/n) didn't know why it took so much effort for her to squeeze Dom's hand even the slightest bit but when she did she saw the look of adoration in his eyes.

"Baby, I... I... today I thought I might lose you, that pain proved just how much you mean to me," Reaching into his pocket, Dom fumbled around with the little box he had been focusing on for the last few hours. "I don't want to lose you, ever. Will you marry me?"

Dom breathed through the words that made his stomach flip and his chest compress until he was barely breathing at all. It was something he had been thinking about for weeks and he had bought a ring about a month ago but he never found the right time to pop the question. But today showed just how much (Y/n) meant to Dom and if he had to be without her he would be forever lost and never himself again. It showed him that he had to marry her, she was the one for him because the way he loved her was so true that it hurt.

Dom was so lost in his thoughts he barely noticed (Y/n) nodding and whispering the word yes repeatedly at him.

He could see through the tears in (Y/n)'s eyes that she was beyond elated even though she was still drowsy and had been through a very traumatic event today.

(Y/n) still didn't have control over her hands from how tightly her wrists had been bound but Dom was very careful and gentle in lifting up her left wrist so he could gently slip the ring onto her finger.

He wasn't willing to lose her, ever.

#law and order #law and order svu #Olivia Benson #amanda rollins #dominic carisi #dominic carisi imagine #imagine #dominic x reader #sonny carisi #sonny carisi x reader

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megalony · 3 years

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This is a new Dom Carisi imagine from Law and Order SVU, I hope you will all like it, feedback is always lovely to have.

Masterlist

Summary: Dom comes home late one night from work and finds (Y/n) in a bad state so he does what he can to look after her and take care of her.

Enjoy.

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Drawing in a deep breath, Dom quietly shut the apartment door behind him as slowly as he could manage so he didn't make a resonating sound through the apartment. Coming home late at night was all well and good if he was coming home from meeting with friends or from a night out or being away somewhere. But coming home late from work was always tiring and it made it harder knowing he had less than twelve hours at home before he had to be back up and ready for his next shift.

From partying to work was one thing, but work straight back to work was a killer. Dom didn't want to wake (Y/n), he knew that she was back on shift with him tomorrow and if she was asleep he didn't want to wake her when they both needed to be up early in the morning.

He wasted no time kicking off his shoes, shrugging off his jacket and unbuttoning his shirt as he trudged through the apartment to get to the bedroom where he just wanted to collapse into an endless sleep.

Surprise flooded through his half-lidded eyes when he saw that the bedside lamp was on and there was no (Y/n) in the bed. He thought she would have been fast off asleep by the time he came home. Leaving his shift half-unbuttoned, Dom backtracked and made his way to the bathroom. He was in need of the quickest wash possible then as long a sleep as he could grab.

Leaning his temple on the door, Dom closed his eyes before he lightly tapped his knuckles against the wood. (Y/n) had to be in the bathroom if she wasn't in bed or in the lounge or kitchen of their apartment and there wasn't any reason she would be in the spare room right now.

"Baby? You in there, can I come in?" Dom knew that he could just walk in, he and (Y/n) had a silent acknowledgement that if one of them was in the bathroom or getting changed or anything, the other could walk in without knocking. But Dom just wanted to be sure, he couldn't hear (Y/n) humming like she usually did, nor could he hear her moving about at all.

It sounded like she was just hiding in silence or even asleep in there.

"Baby?"

Dom felt a shudder rattling up his spine when he heard (Y/n) hiccup and take a sharp, gurgling breath. That was the first noise he had heard her make since he came home and it was a noise he knew well, she was crying.

"What's the matter baby?" His hand tightened around the door handle as he quickly opened it. Something felt off to Dom, it didn't feel like (Y/n) had just woken up from some nightmare or she'd slipped and hurt herself. It seemed like something serious, something must be wrong because whenever (Y/n) was afraid or upset or in pain she would always call out for Dom and want him there. But she had stayed silent since hearing him come home.

"No!"

A gasp escaped Dom's lips when (Y/n) lashed out and hit the door to try and shut it again causing it to smack into his chest. His eyes snapped closed and he took a moment to steady himself, shuddering when he heard (Y/n)'s sobs echoing around the bathroom walls.

"Wh- Baby what are you doing what's wrong?!"

Dom didn't waste any time in barging past the door, he had to know what was wrong with (Y/n) and make sure she was okay. But when he looked around the bathroom, he couldn't quite take it all in.

His eyes landed on (Y/n)'s crumpled frame kneeling on the tiled floor, her arms trembling and scattering around the floor to try and clean up the blood that was surrounding her like a big puddle. But all she managed to do was scrape the blood closer to her and cause big red smears across the light grey tiles beneath her.

"D-don't look, I... I-"

"Baby stop! Hey, talk to me, please baby your scaring me." Dom collapsed down onto his knees in front of (Y/n), fear and pain in his eyes as he looked at her.

Tears were streaked down her face that was blotched red, her eyes puffy and dim like dried glass about to crack. Her whole body was overcome by shaking and her hands and lower arms were covered in streaks of blood and there were a few blotches of blood on her forehead as if she had rubbed at her temple with bloodied hands.

Reaching over, Dom very gently took hold of (Y/n)s's wrists and pulled her hands closer to his chest to stop her from trying to clean the blood. He would do that later once he had determined what had happened and if she was alright.

"Did someone hurt you?"

(Y/n) could hear the rising fury in Dom's voice at the mere thought of someone harming her and for a moment it made her heart jump at his protectiveness. Her mind turned blank for a few seconds when she felt Dom's hands tracing from her wrists up her arms, delicately grazing over her exposed skin and her face to check for any injuries but he could find none.

"I- Dom, I l- lost the baby." (Y/n) could barely get her words out and she could only bare to stare at Dom's chest as she spoke, not having the courage to look up into his soft eyes and see them break.

The thought of the baby hadn't even dawned on Dom until now.

They only found out three weeks ago that they were expecting a baby and it had been a much welcomed surprise for them both. They were married, more than happy, enjoying their jobs and they were ready for this next stage. They were only four months along.

"Shh, shh. It's alright baby, this wasn't your fault. I got you, I'm gonna take care of you." Dom tangled his hand in (Y/n)'s hair, tucking her head under his chin as he wrapped around her like a vine. He could feel her frame relaxing against him like she was melting in relief. (Y/n) knew how much Dom had wanted this baby just like she did, it felt like she had let him down or done something wrong.

She hadn't done anything to endanger the baby, she had felt fine, no morning sickness, no fatigue and she had been excited and done everything she should have. There was no reason for this.

He should have been here. If he was an hour earlier like he planned then he would have been here to support her and help her through it. Instead, (Y/n) had been all alone in pain and confusion going through something so traumatic as this, that wasn't fair.

"Why is there s-so much blood?"

(Y/n) tilted her head back so she could look up at Dom, her raw eyes burning as she had no more tears left to shed. Her hands reached to cling onto Dom's shoulders to steady herself but he could see her eyes fixating on his white shirt which she had now unintentionally stained red. He could feel just how badly she was shaking from her grip on his arms which made him hold her tighter to try and comfort her.

When the baby passed, she thought the blood would have stopped but it just kept coming and coming like a slow river until (Y/n) started to fear that no blood would be left in her body and she would die in the bathroom just bleeding out.

Dom had to admit there did look to be a lot of blood. The floor had turned red and (Y/n) had used three towels to try and soak up the blood before she gave up. Clearly she thought she could try and clean up and try to sort herself out but the trauma of the night had gotten to her. Dom didn't want her to think she had to clean up and act like this was no big deal. She should have called or just left this for him to clean up and deal with. He would clean everything up and sort her out and make sure she was okay, he would always look after her.

"I don't know sweetheart, I don't know." He whispered the words quietly in her ear, resting his temple against her hair. Dom didn't understand why this had to happen to them but he knew that right now, he had to be strong.

He had to look after (Y/n).

"Come on, lets get you cleaned up."

He slowly knelt up and moved himself around so he could sit down with his back up against the bathtub. His arms reached out silently for (Y/n) to come into his arms and he sat her between his legs, tucking her comfortingly into his chest to keep her close. He breathed in her scent as he reached his arm behind him and turned on the bath taps.

They sat in silence, listening to the calming flow of the water as Dom felt (Y/n) slowly starting to calm down in his embrace.

"Okay sweetheart, come here." Dom turned the bath off before he slowly took (Y/n)'s shirt off, seeing that the shirt was all she had been wearing, everything else presumably came off when the pains had started.

Dom said nothing as he slowly moved around and sat up on his knees, he could tell that (Y/n) didn't have the strength or the will to move. She was looking at him like he was some sort of beacon, he was the only thing she could understand or comprehend, the rest of her mind seemed to be at breaking point. But Dom didn't care, he would take care of her, he had vowed to her that he would protect and look after her and that was just what he was going to do.

He looped her arms around his neck before he slowly picked her up bridal style and gently lowered her down into the bath, watching how the heat and the feel of the water instantly soothed her nerves. Dom stayed kneeling down at the side of the tub with his head resting on his arm that was folded on the side of the bath. Using his free hand to wash (Y/n) when he could see she wasn't about to move, she looked like she was in a comatose state.

He watched her close her eyes and become soothed by the hot water that seemed to be taking away some of the pain she was feeling.

"Sweetheart, where is it?" Dom's voice was soft and quiet as he cradled (Y/n)'s face in his hand, smoothing his thumb over her cheekbone to try and keep her calm. He knew she would know what he was talking about, he figured whilst she was calm and trying to relax he could clean up and get her some painkillers ready.

"In the purple towel... Dom, what do we do with..."

"We'll figure that out in the morning sweetheart." Dom leaned over the side of the tub and kissed her temple, a small but broken smile on his lips.

It took Dom a moment to seek out the purple towel (Y/n) had been referring to but he soon noticed it bundled up in the corner next to the sink.

He knew he shouldn't look.

He knew it would be far easier to just carefully pick up the towel and move the tiny bundle into the spare room until they worked out what to do with them tomorrow. But he couldn't help himself, Dom just had to take a peek. His breath resonated around the room before his lungs tensed and stopped working for a few seconds as he gently unfolded the towel.

The tiny form he snook a glance at was nothing like he had ever seen before, and it wasn't something he wanted to see again.

Dom carefully wrapped the towel back around the little bundle that would have been his baby boy or girl in five months time. He willed the tears to go away but they simply fell from his eyes as he quietly left the room.

When he emerged again, his composure was back and he had clean pjamas, a glass of juice and the strongest painkillers he could find.

"Okay baby, let's get you sorted."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I got you something today." Dom leaned his head to the side as he looked down at (Y/n) with a fond, loving look in his eyes.

His hand methodically smoothed over her head, his fingers brushing through her hair in a rhythm that was so calming it was almost sending (Y/n) back to sleep. (Y/n)'s head was resting on Dom's lap and her body was curled up against his side as he was sat up leaning against the headboard.

They had been sat like this for over an hour now, the very low sound of the tv blurring into the background and fading into nothing as they focused on their embrace. Dom hadn't been home for too long but for this last hour it had been nice to just lay with (Y/n) like this without feeling like his head was splitting in two or his heart was breaking in his chest every time it beat.

"Hm?" (Y/n)'s tired eyes looked up at Dom with an inquisitive look that made his heart leap.

For the last two weeks (Y/n) hadn't had the energy or the will to leave the apartment, she'd barely left the bedroom either. She just didn't know how to motivate herself to do anything recently, all she wanted to do was rewind time and carry on where she had left off before that dreadful night.

(Y/n) had almost managed to get herself up for a shower the next day until she spoke to the midwife Dom had called.

He knew he didn't have a choice, Dom didn't know what he should or could do with the baby they lost and he needed someone to check over (Y/n) because she had gone through something traumatic and the blood loss had worried him. (Y/n) had been fine talking to the midwife and was told she was fine under the circumstances and didn't need o go to hospital if she really didn't want to. But it was what she said afterwards that broke (Y/n) completely and tore Dom's heart into shreds.

They had been told that since the baby had been under twenty-four weeks developed and hadn't breathed when they were born, it meant they weren't viable. Their baby couldn't be buried or have a death certificate and if they were cremated it wouldn't be registered as a baby.

(Y/n) knew she had only been four months along but it was still her baby, they had still been real and born and had a heartbeat before they were born. It was as if the midwife had told them that their baby was imaginary and should be treated as such because they weren't as developed as other babies were that got certificates or burials.

Neither (Y/n) nor Dom really knew if they would have wanted to bury their baby or not or have them cremated but the only choice they seemed to have was to cremate their baby and keep their remains. No death certificate also seemed to mean no confirmation that (Y/n) had ever been pregnant. It would blow over, people would ignore the fact they had ever had this miscarriage. If they got pregnant again in the future that would be treated like their first pregnancy but it wasn't, this was their first baby.

"I got you something, come on I'll show you." Dom slowly helped (Y/n) to sit up before he got off the bed and held out his hands.

He would never push (Y/n) in her recovery, he wouldn't force her to get dressed or move around the apartment and clean or cook herself food or even to go outside. She would do what she wanted and would get back into the swing of things at her own pace, Dom knew that. He had also spoken to Olivia and (Y/n) could take as much time as she needed so work wasn't a worry for her either.

And he knew he had gotten something today that would hopefully serve as a help in (Y/n)'s recovery.

(Y/n) took hold of Dom's hands and let him help her off the bed and guide her slowly out of the room. She snuggled herself into his side under his arm, pulling her cardigan closer around her frame as she rubbed at her eyes to try and wake herself up a bit more.

A small flicker of adrenaline and a swarm of butterflies started to tingle in (Y/n)'s stomach at the look on Dom's face and the gentle yet familiar way he was with her.

He guided her to the sofa and sat her down, resting his hands on her shoulders as he kissed her temple before disappearing to go retrieve whatever it was he had gotten her. It reminded (Y/n) of a date or her birthdays, Dom would always cover her eyes so she couldn't see her presents or he would take her somewhere and make her close her eyes so it would be a surprise. He was always one for surprises and loved randomly getting (Y/n) gifts or little trinkets he had seen whilst out.

This was more normal, this was more like them and it made (Y/n) smile to herself. She liked this feeling, this wonder and curiosity and this sense of normality that came with it.

(Y/n) watched with wide eyes as Dom came back into the lounge and set down a pot on the coffee table in front of (Y/n) before he sat beside her. He wore a cheesy yet slightly nervous grin and his eyes creased at the corners like they always did when he was smiling and happy like this.

It was a painted light blue ceramic pot about the size of a candle jar and in the middle was a beautiful red rose bush that was just in the process of beginning to bloom.

(Y/n)'s breath hitched in her throat and her eyes widened as she reached out without thinking to gently brush her index finger over one of the blushing red petals. She had always had a thing for flowers and growing her own little potted flowers was like a hobby, although (Y/n) hadn't had a new flower for a while. Dom always said they would get a house soon with a garden so (Y/n) could grow hundreds of flowers and plants and different flower beds because he loved to watch them grow and she loved to nurture them.

"It's beautiful."

That was the first smile Dom had seen on (Y/n)'s lips for two weeks.

"It's a special rose bush," Dom leaned forward, resting his arms on his thighs and knitting his hands together as his head turned to look at (Y/n). Their eyes locked and he could see the curiosity in her eyes, wanting him to explain. "It's a remembrance flower."

(Y/n) looked between the roses and Dom, her chest filling with anticipation and adrenaline.

"I know that you were upset that we don't have a grave or a place to visit for the baby. So I thought that this could be our grave, our remembrance that we can grow and nurture instead."

Dom talked slowly, his eyes constantly looking over (Y/n)'s features to try and see if she agreed with him and look for any signs of pain or upset or disagreement. But all he could see was love and heartbreak in her watering eyes and the smallest, most gentle smile he had ever witnessed on his wife's lips.

Dom knew that some people had flowers or tokens when they moved away and couldn't go and visit a family members grave. And he had seen how cut up (Y/n) had been about not having a grave to visit, she wanted something to show that they had lost someone, somewhere they could go to mourn and remember. Having the ashes wasn't the same and scattering them didn't feel right because their baby hadn't lived or grown and didn't have a special place where they could be scattered.

But with this bush Dom thought it could be something to remember their baby by. They could watch it grow and remember with the roses and have them grow if they couldn't have their baby.

(Y/n) took Dom by surprise when she threw her arms around his neck and buried her face in his skin, getting as close to him as she could.

"Thank you, I think it's perfect."

#dominic carisi #dominic carisi imagine #dominic x reader #sonny carisi #sonny carisi x reader #imagine #Olivia Benson #law and order #law and order svu

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