#my abandonment issues are awful i hate feeling like this

[friendly-jester]

hmmmm i need to email my therapist for an appointment i think

[daedrabela]

I think I need to just be alone for a bit maybe a few years or maybe forever I need it to just be me

[lesbiansluffy]

but i got so wrapped up in actually spending a pleasant few hours with my mother that for a few minutes i forgot i lived in a world where my relationship with my father is just one (1) honest conversation away from completely evaporating as well

[weebsinstash]

something that I think would be, truly one of the worst things about the yandere Batfamily really truly is their power to make any and every problem you've ever had completely go away in no time at all

it can be such an awful feeling to see that you struggled in vain with something that was nothing at all to someone else. You could have significant issues that have followed you all your life and have had traumatic impacting effects on you and these people could come in and sweep that all away. Student loans you've been paying off for years, if not a fraction of your lifespan, still burying you in debt? We are talking fucking decimal points on the scale of Bruce Wayne's wealth. That bad leg from an old work injury? Let's grab you one of the best doctors in Gotham, if not the entire world, fuck, we may even get you a doctor or medicine that isn't even human-made! Y'all want a magic leg? We know this chick who can speak backwards, you want a magically healed leg?

Crippling loneliness? Eternal sunshine and objectively best Robin Dick Grayson is here to brighten your entire world since he knows what it can feel like to be hurting and alone and he's literally like the heart and soul of the entire manor besides Alfred

Chronic pain, an undiagnosed disability, or maybe you're not confident in your fitness? Jason has extensive knowledge of injury recovery, physical therapy, and overall knowledge about human biology and musculature and how everything correlates

Family issues? Daddy issues? Let Resident Troubled Kid Expert Alfred Pennyworth be your new grandpa. He's dealt with more than one temperamental snappy individual, and he'll use his patience, experience, and wit to wear down all your stress and hostility. It's hard to keep being cruel to someone who's nothing but kind to you, and he has plenty of patience and delicious baked treats to hold out until you give in

Honestly just the fact most of them are so fucking young would get under my skin. You could be approaching your 30s and be sitting here at the Wayne family dinner table as their weird sister/mom/girlfriend/whatever and being all "I've just always had these struggles my entire life, I dont know what's wrong with me, I feel like I can't control how I act or feel and I hate it" and someone like Tim who depending on the source material and where you are on the timeline is a literal teenager with extensive knowledge of criminals and psychology is just over here, "oh, that? You have chronic childhood trauma, recurring resurfacing conflict related ptsd, severe abandonment issues, emotional regulation problems that are probably biological, and also you probably have autism, and there's nothing wrong with any of that :)" and then he turns to Bruce and starts talking about how his school is taking a trip abroad to Greece while you sit there processing that everyone around the table has extensively psychologically evaluated you and you probably have your own file on the Batcomputer (you do. It's excessive.)

It's just. The psychology of having all these problems you've struggled with be wiped away by someone else like it's nothing and how, that can result in making someone feel all the more worthless and helpless. Oh, Bruce was able to just make all your problems disappear? Clearly YOU weren't trying hard enough. Tim is able to suss out what's wrong with you? Well YOU'RE the dysfunctional idiot who was born wrong, and YOU were the one choosing the wrong doctors. You're watching all these young teenagers or young adults be vigilantes and travel the world and learn multiple languages and you're like. Normal guy Steve from the grocery store. You know? They take control of your life and make you feel like a side character in it, because everything you do is now attached to them, and all of them and all of their adventures are so... spectacular

And really, someone with a meaner heart, and maybe someone more blunt like, say, Damian, could perhaps come in and make some comment, "see? This is why you needed our assistance in caring for you" and what are you gonna do, NOT act like they basically fixed your entire life in less than a year's time, with the one objection of kidnapping and imprisonment? You're just over here, "um yeah, actually, I'm an adult and I can take care of myself, you don't need to TAKE CARE OF ME???" meanwhile Bruce and Alfred are exchanging knowing looks while you speak as if the old butler hadn't needed to help you call your doctor and other important urgent matters because being on the phone with strangers gave you such intense anxiety. Ok yes sure honey you are a lovely functional adult and your brain is big and beautiful and perfect 🥰 now shut up about going to live back home on your own, go play Xbox with your new brothers or go bake something with Grandpa while the world's greatest detective sits down in the Batcave using the Batcomputer to track down and "have a friendly chat" with that one childhood teacher that gave you that one really specific trauma-

[anisespice]

heyy

can i request hanma w reader who has abandonment issues? if you don’t write for that kind of topic it’s fine!!(:

take care!!<33

of course! thank u for the request anon, sorry for the delay <3 had to do some more research into the topic, and brush up on my hanma lol hope you enjoy :)) !!

pairing: hanma x gn!reader

warnings: mature language, MDI, crude jokes, violence, cringy/cornball behavior lol and hanma gets his own warning, not proof read, sorry for any errors!! and i think that’s it :)

notes: SO SORRY FOR TAKING LITERALLY A WHOLE YEAR TO MAKE THIS ANON, i wanted to do a little bit of research on the topic (ended up learning a little about myself LMAO) but it’s finally done! i’m happy with how it turned out, and i figured this format would work perfectly, so i hope you enjoy!! <333

tagged: @fantasycantasy , @illegalspacecow, @captaincyberqueen

I struggled with the idea of how Hanma would be like with someone with abandonment issues/anxious attachment. At first, I figured he’d be the absolute worst in terms of handling someone with such an intense need for validation and reassurance, but after some further contemplation I realized how he’d be the absolute best—To the most unhealthily healthy degree, if that makes sense. Let me explain:

“yo, who’s blowing up your phone?”

“jeez, your s/o again? talk about excessive”

“couldn’t be me, bro. if i was you, i’d set a boundary-”

hanma wouldn’t miss a beat by giving them a dangerous grin and say, “i’ll a set a boundary for your fucking teeth if you say another word about my s/o.”

then, in the same beat, he’ll answer your call with a whole different energy, like, “hey doll, my love, my sweet, my sexy” something corny like that

you’d express that he said he’d be back around 9, and it was pushing 9:30…

he’d chuckle fondly, “aw, you miss me that bad? you’re obsessed, doll, it’s adorable.~”

the guys with him would watch in shock as the usually violent, and quick to annoyance, shuji hanma was…understanding? patient??

i hc hanma to be so so so patient with you whenever you get that intense clingy feeling, or talk yourself into thinking he’s sick of you and your neediness

like

homie WANTS you to want him

even to an unhealthy attached degree, sign him up, yes ma’am, yes ham, yes turkey

if you do get into those moods of feeling like he’ll leave you, TRUST that he’s gonna feed into it just a little bit (he’s a bit of a sadistic bastard) only to shower you with every possible reassurance until you are drowning in him him HIM

“why you cryin’, hm? i said i’ll be back, what, you think i’ll just up and leave? never come back?”

“hm, maybe i should do that, make you miss me a little more, yeah?”

but, once he sees you’re really torn up about the thought, he’d gather you in his arms with a small, teasing grin, kissing your tears away and telling you how silly you’re being

“baby, i’d rather get shot in both of my legs than ever think of leaving you”

“you couldn’t get rid of me even if you begged”

“no more cryin’, kay? i hate seeing you cry…unless it’s for different reasons” he’d suggest, earning a weak hit to his arm for being a pervert

he’d snigger, holding you up until your legs wrapped around his waist, “how bout you just come with me then, hm?”

he’s not perfect, far from it, but he tries

he’ll tease, and poke, and push but he always has his moments where he takes your situation deathly serious

like

let someone talk shit about you in anyway, whether it’s about how you need to touch him a lot, or constantly text/call just to hear his voice, or accuse him of this that and the third, just let someone TRY it and he finds out about it

“man, i don’t know how he puts up with them”

“yeah, his s/o clearly has some issues..”

“god forbid he’s gone for more than ten minutes, it’s like they’re some kind of parasite-“

the air in the room shifts DRASTICALLY when they eventually notice hanma standing there, with you at his side looking more than upset

how long he’d been there didn’t matter…the damage was done as soon as those idiots spoke your name

if looks could kill, they’d be playing uno w the devil right about now and losing

hanma looked rather calm. but his eyes told a different story as the gold shined bright with malicious intent

he slowly grinned, tilting his head “oh? don’t stop on our account. keep talkin’. i wanna know what else you think.”

none dared to even blink

you sniffled, embarrassed, ready to bolt out of there, but hanma’s grip on your hand doesn’t falter, merely pulling you closer as he rested his chin on your head

you wiggled for a moment, but hanma wasn’t letting you go anywhere

he called out your name, making you stop as he turned you in his hold to have you look him in the eye

“stay right here. i want you to see just how much i love you. my little parasite.~”

hanma had you stand there and witness what happens whenever someone dares to speak on you and your relationship, solidifying his devotion and loyalty to you and you only

as those guys laid in a pool of their own blood, hanma still took the time to shower you in love and his undivided attention

he’d wipe your tears with bloodstained hands and kiss you hard on the mouth

“you’ll never be too much for me, [_____].”

© 2023-2024 anisespice ッ all rights reserved. likes, comments & reblogs much appreciated!

[ghostfacesvalentine]

Maneater girlfriend - Multimuse x fem!reader

Pairing: Multimuse x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Some mentions of mvrder, not much honestly, some jealousy, but I think that’s it?

Type: Blerps

Request: N/A

Word Count: N/A

Prompt: The muses get maneater girlfriends, how they’d react/act about it.

Notes: Honestly, I know some of us may not always feel like it, but it’s fun to pretend. Just like miss Maddie Perez and my queen Rihanna said, even if you don’t feel like it just pretend. Love my maneater readers. Ps. this isn’t exclusively for fem readers, it can really be for anyone. kiss kiss.

I don’t really know what I was going for, I’m just trying to get my juices going, pls don’t hate. Will probably delete this one tbh

Jason Voorhees: Gets so starstruck around you. It’s actually super cute, he never fails to boost your confidence. No matter what you choose to wear, Jason will stare at you all the time in awe, which of course makes you feel like the prettiest person he’s ever seen. Especially when you decide to go all out, he just becomes a puddle. Jason would literally worship the ground you walk on, you definitely have him under your spell. If you want a fan for a boyfriend, Jason’s the one. The only con is that he’d probably forget to take pictures of you because he’s just daydreaming about his hot s/o.

Michael Myers: Honestly didn’t expect any less, but he is a tiny itsy bitsy threatened by your confidence. Depending on the status of your relationship, it could go one of two ways: He could be completely confident, obviously mopping the floor with the guts of the people who couldn’t keep their eyeballs to themselves, or he could be somewhat weary of the attention you get, no matter who it is. Michael definitely has one of the most toxic abandonment issues, but it’s not like you’d be able to get rid of him, he’d get rid of everyone around you before you could even think about skipping town. Michael would stare a little longer on the days you wear more revealing clothing, it’s your confidence that sells the whole look, he’s absolutely mesmerized by you.

Tiffany Valentine: All for it. Wouldn’t hesitate for a second to help you get into your outfit or finish up your makeup/hair. You’d catch her staring from time to time, which she’d laugh it off not expecting to be caught. I could see her getting jealous at times if it seems like someone has your attention and if they cross a line, a knife crosses their artery, no hesitation. Tiffany would absolutely take pictures of you and post you all over her social media, she wouldn’t mind the thirst comments you’d get, after all you were hers. Tiffany would definitely boost your confidence and you’d both become the ultimate deadliest hot couple.

Billy Loomis: Ok, controversial opinion, but Billy isn’t really used to having maneater girlies. He’s used to having cute, beautiful women, but no one willing to stare daggers into your eyes from across the room. He’s absolutely mesmerized, without knowing it, he’d do anything for you. Billy cannot keep his hands to himself, no matter what you’re wearing, or what you’re not wearing. He’s not the best at taking pictures of you, but you’re damn right he’d keep every picture of you he can get a hold of. Sure he can get jealous, but he also knows he has you wrapped around his finger and no one else.

Stu Macher: Everyone expects Stu to have the hottest girl in school, this is no exception. The way you don’t look away when you catch him staring at you is enough to make him fall in love. As much as I love Stu, I know he’s superficial, so if your looks caught his eye, he would do his best to make your relationship work. Even if it means he has to get the right angles when taking pictures of you. Stu would absolutely brag about you, first about how you look then about what you do or what your interests are. Just like Jason, unintentionally, Stu would worship the ground you walk on. 

Patrick Bateman: Ok honestly what else did you expect. Just like Stu, Patrick is superficial. He always wants to make sure he has the hottest/most confident person within 1000 miles. He’d never admit how he likes your lack of interest in impressing every person you meet. That’s probably the trick. Patrick will never forget the times you’d be approached by wealthy men, or simply attractive people that you just couldn’t care for. That would be one of Patrick’s biggest flexes. Of course he’d always want you to look your best, so he does his part in boosting your confidence through pictures, outfits and compliments. Patrick isn’t shy about showing you off.

Leatherface: Just like Jason, he’s stuck. He can’t believe someone like you is interested in him. You are the prettiest most beautiful creature he’s ever seen. Bubba would absolutely worship the floor you walk on. He’s at your beck and call. He’d do whatever he could to impress you, getting you flowers, learning to make your favorite meals, helping you around the house. He’d do anything to spend time with you and just stare at you. He absolutely loves having printed pictures of you, even if getting him a shirt with your face on it was a joke, he’d absolutely wear it without hesitation. To him, your face is a work of art that should be appreciated.

Billy Hargrove: Honestly, didn’t know what he was getting himself into until he realized how much attention you actually got when you’d clean up. At first he didn’t know how to handle it exactly. Of course, Billy would play it off, knowing if you would wander off, he wouldn’t waste his time. Still, that doesn’t mean he wasn’t completely infatuated with you. Your mannerisms are what kept his attention. He can’t describe it, but it’s definitely your aura that intoxicates him. The fact that others would consider you a “maneater” and that it was Billy Hargrove that pulled you? (I mean of course he did right?) he’d hesitate to admit that it boosted his ego a little bit, but he made sure others kept their hands to themselves. 

Steve Harrington: Steve would be a little more confident than the rest on this list I’d say. He knows you’re hot and he would remind you that all the time. “Well when I first saw you, I’m not gonna lie I thought you’d like, throw a drink at me and tell me to get lost. I don’t know how long I’ve been staring” Of course, being out if it got out of hand with others, Steve wouldn’t hesitate to step in, but otherwise, he’s of course constantly staring at you with a big dorky smile. He’d find any excuse to take pictures of you, even if you’re just relaxing. For sure he’d keep a picture of you in his car.

Bruce Wayne: An awkward little mess. Just the kind to stand there and look at you from afar. During the night, in his double life, he’d keep a tab on you. Of course if you went out frequently, it would only give him more of an excuse to try to bump into you. At first it’d be to just get a glimpse of you, later on to get to know you. Bruce was a billionaire, there must’ve been hundreds of models and wealthy women trying to tie him down and yet there you were not able to get more than a few sentences out of him. Eventually after he powered through to actually ask you out, he would do his best to make sure you were in the finest of clothing and enjoyed all kinds of luxuries. Even from time to time, you’d catch him staring from afar. Other times, you’d find magazines with you and him pictures laying about, but he’d never admit he just loved the way you would photograph.

Steve Rogers: Of course he was used to being among the most desired men to date, but that doesn’t mean at times he still seemed to fail at asking anyone out on a date. Especially you, who would just stare right through the men that would be entitled enough to think you were already interested in them. Eventually though, you managed to cross paths and who could really resist Steve’s charm? Just like the rest on this list, you’d catch him staring, but at times his gaze seems more sinister than the rest. Of course Steve would encourage you to dress whatever way you felt best in, but don’t put it past him to lay a hand over your ass in public when he’d feel the slightest bit of eyes on you.

Loki Laufeyson: His argument would be that he was a prince, of course he would have a maneater s/o, what else did anyone expect. Still, deep down there was a weary feeling of insecurity at times, especially growing under his brothers shadow. That’s when he’d become overly protective around you, when anyone else was present, but even more around his brother. Even if Thor swore to never lay but a finger on you unless you needed saving, Loki would be incredibly possessive. He’d never admit it, but you mesmerized him, he wasn’t shy about admiring you even at times when you’d catch him.

Spencer Reid: Kind of funny that you’d both fit the “nerd x maneater” trope, but I mean, of course you did. Just like Loki, there would be a tiny feeling of insecurity, but Spencer would trust you unless you gave him a reason not to. There would be a little bit more pressure on him to keep alert when you were out in public, even if you knew how to defend yourself. Spencer would love to take pictures of you and use them as bookmarks or keep them framed. He’d need a ton of reassurance and he’d be honest about it. I think he’d be the healthiest on this list about this trope, kinda cute. Would NOT be happy about the team suggesting to use you as bait though.

[llamagoddessofficial]

You mentioned being thinking a lot about Error these days, can you give us some headcanons you have about him? It can be any type of headcanons (how he passes his time, fluff or angst times with reader... you name it)

HOHO

I love Error. I am obsessed with Error. I headcanon me and him having a love-hate relationship because all I do is make crackhead AUs nonstop and there's nothing he can do about it. Here's headcanons for my personal Error.

He's a jealous manbaby. Of course.

Possessive, too- desperate for your affection, but absolutely unwilling to admit it, if you laugh at someone else's joke or smile at them too long it puts him in fits of irritation that make him constantly try to one-up whoever is 'stealing' your time.

Regularly flexes his power. It comes across as childish or self-absorbed, but it's actually in a misguided attempt to impress you.

(He's always trying to impress you)

No sense of boundaries. Will come in and out of your home like a stray cat, regardless of how often you tell him not to.

Error is allergic to just asking for attention. He's not used to wanting to touch anyone, so when he does suddenly get the urge to touch you, he's completely unable to stop himself. He has a terrible habit of snatching you over to him with his string, for reasons as simple as 'i don't like how far away you're standing, stand closer to me'.

Sometimes, if he's in a particularly awful mood, he'll just take you to the anti-void and string you up near him so you can't leave while he seethes. Sucks for you in that moment, but it's much better alternative to what he used to do when he was in a bad mood.

Desperate to cuddle- but can't bring himself to say so. He drops unsubtle hints like "you look cold" in the hopes that you'll ask first.

If he likes you, he'll bring you things from other multiverses, like an overzealous magpie decorating a nest. But if he really likes you he'll knit/crochet you things. It's one of the few times he seems genuinely proud of himself.

You'll know he feels comfortable around you when you start seeing him wearing his glasses.

Talk to him about shows you like! He enjoys hearing you talk. He might find you a multiverse where that show's events are actually happening.

If he likes you enough to crochet you stuff, he 100% has a doll of you somewhere. He absolutely talks to it. If you find it, try not to mention it, there'll never be a more awkward conversation

... It's no surprise that his jealousy and anger issues come from deep rooted fear. He doesn't know who he is. He feels untouchable, but equally unlovable, a stranger on the outside of a multiverse where everyone else seems to have someone. It's why his affection is that bizarre mix of desperation but trepidation.

Reaching out means feeling again- under all the power, he's an insecure and terrified kid.

With time, and reciprocated affection, he can definitely chill out. Learn to reign in his jealousy, just because you found someone's pun funny doesn't mean you're going to abandon him. He'll start acting less like Error, and... more like Sans.

[electricbathsalt]

I think part of the reason why Overhaul is hated more and seems less deserving of “redemption” (atonement, whatever) than the league of villains is, besides the more fleshed out backstories of the latter, the observer effect so to speak. The civilians killed by league? We don’t know them. We can headcanon that they all were bastards and nobody would care. But Eri? We know Eri. She is also a child, which gives Chisaki extra points on “awfulness”. Personally, I think they both did terrible shit, but “death of one is a tragedy, death of millions (in not saying Shiggy outright killed millions) is a statistic”

Hi, I’m sorry it took me so ridiculously long to get back to you, but I promise it was because I was turning this that way and this way over and over again in my head. I feel you are right.

Chisaki primarily hurt characters who we actually get to know (Eri, Magne, Compress, Mirio, Nighteye) and more than that, he hurt them in permanent ways, entirely onscreen, something that was previously untouched in MHA. The LOV’s victims are rarely even shown, especially outside of the two-second scene where they get killed.

Something I rarely ever see people mention is how the LOV’s original plan was to kidnap Eri. You can say that maybe they were just going to keep her in the background while they did whatever/taken care of her. You could also say that they were planning to hand her over to Garaki so they could try to make the quirk-destroying bullets themselves. We have no idea what the rest of that plan was.

You see, Chisaki and the LOV are opposites in how they’re presented to the audience. The LOV’s “villainous acts” are typically vague and impermanent, whereas the reasoning behind why they’re a villain and why they do these things is detailed and patiently shown. Chisaki’s “villainous acts” are all onscreen and their consequences/pain happen to people we actually know, pain that we get to see. What actually happened to him in his youth and seeded these issues in him? We don’t get anything outside of strictly-plot-relevant details. With this, you have the perfect formula to have people believe that “this group” is better than “that group”.

It’s pretty clear Chisaki’s character is not meant to be understood in the same way the LOV are, because he is not like the LOV. He was abandoned, but he was also taken in, so he’s fine. His father-figure didn’t seem to outright abuse him, so his childhood was good. He was experimented on, but was he? And not anymore and we don’t get to see how he was before he was experimented on, so he’s fine and was always this way. He technically had everything the LOV members didn’t, so he never had anything significantly negative happen to him and he’s a jackass simply because he wants to be one.

Chisaki’s traumatic experiences were never explicitly shown, so they never happened. LOV’s bad actions were never explicitly shown (without a thorough explanation as to why they did them), so they weren’t that bad. Easy as that.

I have a lot of feelings towards the people who will scream at the top of their lungs endlessly about how the LOV members should all get perfectly happy endings, and then turn around and tear Chisaki to absolute shreds. I understand to an extent, but it is slightly ironic…

They’re all horrible people. Maybe they could’ve turned out better had their circumstances been different. That applies to all of them, the LOV and the Shie Hassaikai.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for avoiding my girlfriend?

I (21F) have been in a relationship with V (21F) for a few months now, and at first, I thought our situation was perfect. She was loving towards me, and I towards her, and it felt like we were a perfect match.

I knew going into the relationship that V had borderline personality disorder, and had a lot of issues with abandonment and a past ex, but I thought I could handle it and told her vehemently that that didn't matter. I still wanted to be with her.

Over time, she progressively got more and more clingy, constantly asking for me to reassure her that I love her and that I don't think she's a horrible person. I know it's a result of her BPD, but every time she apologizes for having feelings or not understanding a joke of mine it actually... really annoys me? I went from feeling sorry for her to 'oh brother, here we go again,' knowing that I'll be spending the next hour telling her I don't think she's an awful human being just for not getting a reference I made.

As a result, I've started avoiding her. I really do love her but I have other responsibilities, other friends, and other important things to do in the day, when I know if I show my face she'll want to spend the /entire/ day with me and take a soft no as an indication that I hate her. I don't know how to bring it up to her without her breaking down and possibly hurting herself, since I know she actively does that sort of thing and I do have past trauma involving an ex hurting themself because of something I said.

I just feel really drained every time I talk to V anymore. She says things nowadays that really offput me, like wanting to 'impregnate'(?????) me and discussing marriage. I've started to feel irritated and driven to keep hiding myself from her every time I see her say almost anything about me, which ranges from 'I miss my wife I hope I die' (we are not married.) to 'She's so beautiful and soft' (I absolutely despise being called soft).

I just really need to know AITA here? Is what I'm doing a normal response, or am I just a douche?

What are these acronyms?

[holylulusworld]

Big girls don't cry (4)

Summary: You are no stranger to heartbreak.

Pairing: CEO!Steve Rogers x Plussized!Reader

Warnings: heavy angst, strong reader, mentions of former heartbreak, arguments, regret, fear of commitment, abandonment issues,

Big girls don’t cry masterlist

Part 3

“Stevie, go in there and talk to her,” Bucky groans. “I didn’t almost get killed by your angry girlfriend only for you to chicken out now. Go—”

Bucky shoves his friend toward the door.  

“What if she doesn’t want to see me? Y/N hates me now, and I can only blame myself. I let my insecurities and fear of commitment get the best out of me.”

“Yeah, you fucked things up big time, punk. Now go in there and fix things with your lovely lady. You love that woman, right?” 

“I had the ring, and the proposal planned and chose the easy way out. I got scared. Scared that she’ll laugh at me. Or even worse, say no. I saw her throw the ring in my face and run off. I’m not worthy of her love.”

“Y/N is a great person. She’s kind, smart and caring. I can’t imagine her doing such a thing. If you are honest with her, she’ll not break your heart,” Bucky smirks. “Maybe she breaks your dick with her baseball bat, though.”

“Buck,” Steve reaches for the door handle, “whatever happens now. Thank you for trying.”

“Just don’t chicken out or get your dick out,” the brunette chuckles. “I can tell, women don’t like it when you get it out after a fight.”

“What?” Steve side-eyes his friend. “What did you do, Buck?”

Bucky shrugs. “It was a case of miscommunication. I thought she wanted to have make-up sex, and she wanted to break up with me.”

“You’re unbelievable. I can’t believe I asked you for advice on relationship problems.”

“Hey, what can I say? The ladies love me?” Bucky grins. “But enough of me and my perfect face, and dick. You should go inside and finally talk to her. People are watching.”

“Hi, uh- thank you for letting me come here. Bucky said you will hear me out,” Steve awkwardly stands in the middle of the empty bakery. “Not many people around today.”

“We are renovating,” you quip, not even sparing Steve a glance. You practiced this conversation in front of the mirror and can’t show weakness. “I told you so a month ago.”

“I didn’t know it was this one,” he licks his lips. “You scared the shit out of Bucky.” He chuckles. “And I can tell, Bucky never gets scared.”

“He’s a baby,” you snicker. “Your friend almost peed his pants when I got the baseball bat out.” It feels awkward being around Steve again. “You wanted to talk, so talk.”

“Maybe…you could start,” Steve stammers. “I know you are angry and hurt. And you have every right to be angry. What I said was awful, and I know now that you went through so much in the past that you cannot forgive me. I just wanted you to know that I—”

He hesitates. Steve looks at his shoes, shaking his head. He takes a few deep breaths. “Sorry, I need…shit…” 

“What do you want to say, Steve?” 

“I-I love you,” he almost yells. It’s the first time he has said it with fear in his eyes. “I know that I said it before, but I wanted you to hear it one last time.”

“Steve, I thought we wanted to talk. This was more like a monologue. I wanted to talk about the things Bucky told me about your past. Why did you never tell me about the people bullying you.”

“I could ask you the same,” he gives you a cracked smile. “I-I was ashamed, I guess. I wasn’t always like this. Back then, I tried so hard to fit in. It was never enough, though. Not once was I good enough for anyone.”

“Boys always treated me like I’m not good enough to be seen with them,” you sniffle. “When you said all those things, I felt like the little girl who got her heart broken for the first time.”

“Y/N…” He fights the tears. “I was a weak and thin boy back then. Sick too. No one wanted to be my friend but Bucky. He was tall, cocky, and popular. They didn’t understand why he was my friend. I didn’t get it myself. He could’ve been friends with everyone.”

“He’s a nice guy,” you wipe your eyes and sniffle. “And a good friend. He almost got hit by a baseball bat for you.”

“When I liked a girl for the first time, she punched my nose and called me a loser. I was like six or seven.” He sighs deeply. “I know, this is no excuse.”

“It is not. I got rejected all my life too, but I would never do such a thing to you. I loved you so, and then you say something like that,” You push the tears away. “I was so happy, and you broke my heart.”

“I’m so sorry, doll. All my life I tried to forget about my past, and the weak boy from back then.” Steve takes a step toward you, holding out his hand. “In my teens, I fell in love with a girl. I believed she liked me too.” 

“She told everyone about it, didn’t she?” You softly ask. “Bucky told me about it. What was her name?”

“Peggy Carter,” Steve winces when her name leaves his lips. “I realized she only liked me as long as I helped her get better grades.”

“Same here,” you take his offered hand to squeeze it tightly. “I was twelve. At least I shoved the bastard against the wall and called him a dipshit.”

Steve grins. “I’m glad you did, doll.”

“Do you want to hear a fun fact?” Steve places your hand on his chest. “I met her two years ago. She didn’t even remember me. Imagine, Peggy was all over me and tried to get in my pants.”

“No way.”

“I turned her down, though. She got mad. I bet Peggy Carter never got turned down before. Well, I told her it’s payback for what she did to me when I was a kid.”

“Good for you. I mean, that you go the chance to pay her back.” You glance up at Steve, feeling unsure of how to proceed now. You’ve missed him so much, but you are scared to give in to him only to get hurt again. “Steve, I can’t go back to what we had so easily. I need…”

“I know, baby doll,” he wraps his arms around you to at least hold you one last time. “Please never believe you are not worthy of love, or that you should settle for someone who’s not worthy of your love. I wish you love. A love that will give you everything you’ll ever need…”

Part 5

Tags in reblog.

[hannibals-favourite-meal]

.⋆｡Through The Bad And The Good｡⋆.

Dick Grayson x plus size reader

The one where Dickie and Dove break up and then get back together.

Warnings: break-up, some angst, fluff, mentions of abandonment issues, a little sadness, implied smut, getting back together

WC: 1k

Minors DNI

Library- @hannibals-favourite-meal-library

The Graysons

There was something so inherently sad about a lone coffee mug in a cabinet. Was the absence of any more because the others broke or were they taken away? Or was this all there was?

The faded character of a fat orange cat professed that he 'h-ted mo-days', the ink slipping from the porcelain with each use. You stared at the mug blankly, just as you had all the rest of your belongings. It was all lopsided and wrong, each piece missing parts of themselves.

You sighed and looked away as you slumped down onto the counter, resting your cheek against the cool surface. Normally by now you would be cooking up a storm, preparing to feed an army of two but now you weren't doing anything.

“At least my grocery bill will be a hell of a lot cheaper.” You laughed to yourself, but really, you felt like crying.

The apartment was quiet, painfully so, and all you could think about was that stupid fucking mug.

You supposed that the breakup was inevitable, you had your shit and he had his and it was obvious that the relationship wasn't going anywhere. There was no screaming or breaking each other's things. There wasn't 'the other woman' or some wildly inappropriate friendship. It was a quiet discussion that ended with him looking at you solemnly from your front door before he shut it as he walked away.

Even if you both promised to remain friendly, he had not even texted you and your chest still burned with the pain of an awful breakup, the feeling that you've lost such a big person in your life forever.

“I don't think this is working.” You had been the one to break the tense silence of the bedroom. After yet another sleepless night where you both lay on the bed, backs facing each other, you were done.

His shoulders sagged. “I think so too.” He took your hand in his own and suddenly, it all felt like a good-bye. Tears rolled down your cheeks and you fell into his awaiting arms, his own sobs muffled against your hair.

Your eyes flicked back to the mug. “Fuck.” You got up and slammed the cabinet door shut. “Fuck him. Fuck this. I'm better off alone!”

You knew you were lying.

—————

Every trace of him had been scrubbed from your apartment by your friends who seemed all-too pleased that you had 'kicked him to the curb'. They never really hated Dick, you supposed they just wanted to support you.

But now, you kind of wish you had indulged them a bit more, letting them burn the small box of things that they had found after he moved out because now, you were spiralling.

The polaroid you took on your first date (he was so breathtakingly handsome, you couldn't believe that he asked you out), his favourite cereal spoon (it had a superman logo embossed on the bottom), and the Gotham City sweater you bought for him that still mysteriously smelt of him, even a month after he wore it last.

You slipped the soft material over your head before you could rationally think about it and suddenly that vice around your heart loosened just a fraction and you could breathe again.

Breaking up was the right thing to do.

Your life goals didn't line up.

He had responsibilities outside of you that were more important.

You never saw each other.

He never did the dishes and always left his underwear on the floor.

Women and men constantly flirted with him.

He was a trust-fund baby and a cop.

He was a vigilante with severe abandonment issues.

But god, he was so perfectly imperfect. He spoiled you rotten and worshipped the ground you walked on. He was honest and patient and kind. You blended so well into each other's friend groups. The chemistry was out of this world and he was by far the best lay you ever had. His family loved you. He had to have been sculpted by the gods with his chiselled body and boyish smile. He knew how to get you out of your shell while respecting your boundaries. He was strong. He was intelligent. He had manners. He was tall. He was passionate and giving. You could read each other so well it was almost frightening. He valued you.

You loved him, he loved you. And that's all that really mattered wasn't it.

Dick Grayson was your soulmate and you let him leave.

Your feet carried you out of your bedroom mindlessly. You slipped on your shoes and glanced over your shoulder towards the kitchen, where your lone coffee mug sat on the counter. Garfield's half-smile seemed to mock you.

You snatched it up. “I'm getting him back.” You insisted as you lay your hand on the doorknob. “I have to get him back.”

The door swung open.

And there he was, fist raised as if he were about to knock, a bouquet of flowers in his other hand. Time paused for a moment as you both took each other in.

His eyes were red and there were dark bags beneath them, he was just a little paler, a little more forlorn but he was still your Dick. He smiled then and everything else faded away.

“That's my favourite mug.”

“Those are my favourite flowers.” You retorted, making him chuckle. “Wanna come in?”

He looked hesitant for a moment. “I had a whole romantic gesture planned. I wanted to woo you.” He said in a tone very similar to a whine.

You smirked as you grabbed his collar, dropping the mug in the process, and yanked him into the apartment. Dick followed enthusiastically, his hands flying to your wide hips as he ducked down to brush his nose against yours.

“Woo me later, I need you now.”

“Yes ma'am.” As he carried you to the bedroom, the both of you too wrapped up in each other to even care about the shattered porcelain and crushed flowers on the floor, you knew that you had each other through the bad and the good.

And there was so much good coming your way.

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the tortured poets department (sponsored by my procrastination)

excuse my essays for each song the lyrics are so interesting to me so there’s like actual analyzation for each one.

fortnight - dex

that lingering resentment disguised by surface level friendship is that not literally him and sophie come on. “run into you sometimes, ask about the weather” the awkwardness!! “your wife waters flowers, i want to kill her” he was the #1 fitz hater for multiple reasons after all (although i think he was over it by the time keefe became prominent)

the tortured poets department - sophie

this is so keefe from her perspective come on “you’re in self sabatoge mode, throwing spikes down the road, but i’ve seen this episode and still love the show” “i chose this cyclone with you” “sometimes i wonder if you’re gonna screw this up with me. but you told [biana] that you’d kill yourself if i ever leave. and i had said that to [dex] about you so i felt seen. everyone we know understands why we’re meant to be.” also let’s be so real keefes drawing journals + goodbye letters, he’s giving tortured poet

my boy only breaks his favorite toys - fitz

guys he’s just a silly little boy with anger issues, and he’s MY silly little boy with anger issues stop hating him 😞 “the voices in his head called the rain to end our days of wild” “he saw forever so he smashed it up” he may have fucked up but it happens!!

down bad - dex

CUZ FUCK IT HE WAS IN LOVE!!! also if i may present to you: “i might just die it would make no difference” in the context that outside of sophie saw no purpose to his own life. he saw himself just as he is presented in the books: as her best friend and nothing more. so in losing that (blaming himself and his own feelings for it) what was left of him? who was left? sophie was also his ONLY friend. not to mention in the context of the fact that when he WAS presumed dead nobody cared, they still cared more about sophie.

so long, london - keefe

no not bc of london actually but because “and you say i abandoned the ship but i was going down with it, my white knuckle dying grip holding tight to your quiet resentment” is actually a direct reference to keefitz’ friendship falling apart as fitz got angrier and keefe got more closed off. “you swore that you loved me but where were the clues?” “im just mad as hell cause i loved this place” me when everglen is no longer keefes safehaven. nor anyone’s for that matter bc its haunted by alvars betrayal and alden’s mind break and fitz’ anger.

but daddy i love him - biana

“i just learned these people only raise you to cage you” “i just learned these people try and save you…cause they hate you” “dutiful daughter all my plans were laid…growing up precocious sometimes means not growing up at all.” i hate alden vacker. how do u manage to use and fuck up all ur kids by age 12 like wow. “i’ll tell you something about my good name: it’s mine alone to disgrace” she would 100% say this. she would also 100% say “im having his baby! no im not but you should see your faces.”

fresh out the slammer - keefe

sokeefe or keefitz take it as it comes. “in the shade of how he was feeling.” “as i said in my letters.” “my friends try, but i wouldn’t hear it…for just one glimpse of his smile” “swirled you into all of my poems” it’s so him it is truly.

florida!!! - keefe

THIS one’s about london! “well me and my ghosts, we had a hell of a time! yes i’m haunted but im feeling just fine” ethan and eleanor wright who?? “your home’s really only a town you’re just a guest in” candle shade/shores of solace type beat “i need to forget so take me to [london], i have some regrets i’ll bury them in [london]” “i don’t want to exist so take me to [london]” aw bae

guilty as sin? - dex

i don’t know how to explain but i just feel like this feeling of i shouldn’t be doing/feeling this the literal guilt and all these delusions and the sheer intensity of it all is just giving me dex. “this cage was once just fine, am i allowed to cry? i dream of cracking locks, throwing my life to the wolves or the ocean rocks” “i keep these longings locked in lowercase inside a vault” this must be the way he loves if he thinks so little of himself and doesn’t let himself have good things. “i choose you and me religiously” because at the end of the day when he makes a decision or chooses something or someone he puts his all into it.

who’s afraid of little old me - sophie

“you lured me and you hurt me and you taught me. you caged me then you called me crazy. i am what i am cuz you trained me.” all of it’s literally giving her growing into herself in stellarlune and making decisions on her own. SHE IS NOT A PAWN!!!

i can fix him (no really i can) - tam

idk its just giving him defending rayni with his life when everyone else including linh was like who tf is this girl.

loml - fitz

every sad pining song is fitz vacker to me. esp the refrences to the romance being dead but never buried... "still alive killing time at the cemetery, never quite buried...i'm your holy ghost" the way that sophie switched up on him in stellarlune (although i fully support her) didn't give him much time to recover. "are they second-hand embarrased that i can't get out of bed because something counterfiet's dead" give me heartbroken fitz!!! for once instead of angry fitz just give me tired, resigned fitz. "it was legendary, it was momentary, it was unecessary, should've let it stayed buried" is such a good summary of sophitz imo.

i can do it with a broken heart - linh

linh is so interesting to me as a parallel of fitz: meaning she, just like him, is always angry. however she masks it in smiles and kindness the way he never learned to, he just lashes out. this song feels like it’s talking about that mask: “i’m so depressed i act like it’s my birthday everyday” “i can read your mind ‘she’s having the time of her life’ …i can show you lies” “cause im miserable and nobody even knows” “i can hold my breath, i’ve been doing it since [i] left”

the smallest man who ever lived - keefe

it’s giving a letter to cassius/gisela/alvar. “and i don’t even want you back, i just want to know if rusting my sparkling summer was the goal. and i don’t miss what we had” “did you sleep with a gun underneath our bed?” “in 50 years will all this be declassified and you’ll confess why you did it, and i’ll say ‘good riddance’” “i would’ve died for your sins instead i just died inside. and you deserve prison but you won’t get time” “in plain sight you hid, but you are what you did. and i’ll forget you but i’ll never forgive.”

the alchemy - sophie

“cause the sign on your heart said it’s still reserved for me. honestly, who are we to fight the alchemy?” aw sokeefe.

clara bow - biana

BIANA BEING COMPARED TO HER BROTHERS AND ALL THE VACKERS BEFORE THEM "the crown is stained but you're the real queen" "beauty is a beast that roars, down on all fours, demanding more...its hell on earth to be heavenly" i love her.

the black dog - fitz

bring back petty fitz!! i think the young girl not knowing the starting line could parallel with keefe not being able to understand things about telepathy that really connected fitz and sophie. i also think we could shift the angle and make it about alvars betrayal and how it sparked his angry trauma response. “you said i needed a brave man, then proceeded to play him until i believed it too.” “now i want to sell my house and set fire to all my clothes…even if i die screaming, and i hope you hear it.”

imgonnagetyouback - fitz

he is 100% this delusional. he's just like me. "you'll find that you were never not mine" "even if its handcuffed im leaving here with you." "told my friends i hate you but i love you just the same, pick your poison babe, i'm poison either way"

the albatross - keefe

“one bad seed kills the garden. one less temptress, one less dagger to sharpen.” “the devil that you know looks now more like an angel. i’m the life you chose, and all this terrible danger.” HE IS THE ALBATROSS. i can’t wait for the movie i want edits of him to this. ACTUALLY I WANT A LOT OF THINGS maybe I’ll make a separate post about that.

chloe or sam or sophia or marcus - keefe

you saw it coming. this song SCREAMS KEEFITZ. like- “you said some things that i can’t unabsorb…you needed me but you needed drugs more.” “changed plans and lovers and outfits and rules all to outrun my desertion of you.” “if you want to break my cold cold heart just say ‘i loved you the way that you were’” WHAT THE HECK DUDE IM SOBBING “back to the moment i crashed into you like so many wrecks do” that line solidified this as keefe’s pov for me. in conclusion. SOBBING.

how did it end - biana

i propose to you: not a relationship, but the vacker family falling apart and the way they became a huge subject of gossip in the lost cities. when alden’s mind broke, while fitz had turned to anger biana became depressed, and i think this song could relate to that as well. the whole part of “guess who we ran into at the shops” feels very much like conversations others would have about the vackers at the time and when alvar betrayed them. “soon they’ll go home to their [brothers], smug cause they know they can trust him.” and i think at the end of the day when all of it happened biana was just young and betrayed and lost, because she didn’t see it coming or understand why (who did?) “the deflation of our dreaming, leaving me bereft and reeling” “i can’t pretend like i understand, how did it end?”

so high school - biana

HER VIBES ALL THE WAY she’s so cute and lovely and i want this for her (and dex. specifically dex. not anyone else.)

i hate here - sophie

was leaning dex until “you see i was a debutant in another life but now i seem to be scared of going outside” but the whole idea of escapism applies to both of them. especially to sophie though when she lived with humans and was so alone because even her own family couldn’t understand her, and she canonically is a bookworm and probably found more comfort in those other lives than she ever could in her own. "I hate it here so I will go to secret gardens in my mind...i read about it in a book when I was a precious child" "ill get lost on purpose, this place made me feel worthless"

thanK you aIMee - tam

aimee 🤝🏽 the song parents. “everyone knows that my [sister] is a saintly woman. but she used to say she wished that you were dead.” “but when i count the scars there’s a moment of truth: that there wouldn’t be this if there hadn’t been you.” thank you song parents 🫶🏽

i look in people’s windows - fitz

i thought this song sounded so creepy till I actually listened to it and now the idea of like lowkey stalking someone just to see if they still care about you or have moved on is slightly making sense. "does it feel alright to not know me? i'm addicted to the if only." it's giving keefitz (when isn't it?)

the prophecy - dex

"let it once be me, who do i have to speak to about if they can redo the prophecy?" THIS JUST REMINDS ME SO MUCH OF THE BEGINNING OF STELLARLUNE WHEN HES LITERALLY MOURNING WHAT HASN'T EVEN HAPPENED TO HIS BROTHER YET i need more dex being the oldest sibling and shouldering that burden. the love-hate relationship with his siblings while simultaneously trying to make their quality of life so much better than what he had. also "a lesser woman would've lost hope, a greater woman wouldn't beg" is so him. he is so that middle.

cassandra - tam

"so they killed cassandra first cuz she feared the worst...do you believe me now?" "you can mark my words, i said it first. in a mourning warning, no one heard." tam when keefe joined the neverseen fr

peter - keefe

pls tell me you saw this one coming. "are you still a mindreader? a natural scene stealer, I've heard great things [fitz], but life was always easier on you than it was on me." "promises, oceans deep, but never to keep" "forgive me [fitz], my lost fearless leader...from when we were just kids. is it something I did?" i think I'm just in a constant state of mourning their friendship.

the bolter - keefe

obvious reasons but also "i can confirm she made a curious child, ever reviled by everyone but her own father." "hearts are hers for the breaking, there's escape in escaping." "she's got the best stories, you can be sure, as she was leaving, it feels like freedom."

robin - dex

had to do some research for this one but apparently its talking about preserving a child's innocence! for this reason it reminds me again of dex and his siblings because of the way he really wants to protect them from things that haven't happened yet (especially considering rex being talentless). "way to go tiger" definitely sounds like something he would say to them feeling all sentimental but then, knowing siblings, they'd probably grill him about why he's being nice 💀

the manuscript -

we know the drill by now, fitz gets all the breakup songs because they could be about sophie OR keefe. "afterwords, she only ate kid's cereal, and slept in her mother's bed" while the song is discussing reverting back to childhood habits in vulnerability, fitz's vulnerability made him angry (but it was still a big change from his regular self) "looking back might be the only way to move forward" I hope he does get to move on!!! im tired of the love triangle plot if we're not gonna focus on keefitz' friendship 😭

[ninyard]

kevin and jeremy for the headcanon game if you’re still doing it pls :)))

i did kevin already so here's my #2 babygirl jeremy,, i hate to call him a golden retriever but... if the shoe fits

realistic headcanon: he has adhd but can't be medicated because USC take drug testing seriously and his meds are banned by the NCAA and the ERC. he can take them when they're not in competition, but once the season starts, he has to come off them again. oh, he is Symptomatic. he has location tracker tag things on his keys, find my iphone is ALWAYS on, he's had more bank cards than years in his life, is a frequent victim of the ADHD tax on subscriptions he forgets to cancel. he always writes important things he has to remember on his hands and then washes his hands forgetting they're there. he forgets to pee if he's too focused on something. he has 100 abandoned hobbies (the yo-yo is his newest one). he talks too loud when hes excited. he has sensory issues. hes really smart but hates academics. talks to himself sometimes. (getting him mic'ed up during a game is a dream and a treat because of the things he says while talking to himself)

may not be realistic it is hilarious: he loves drugs on the off-season. he absolutely loves going clubbing and MDMA is his favourite. he'd also take half or a quarter of a pill just chilling with Laila and Cat and have a mini party just the three of them. he believes he is his best self when he is high on uppers. not a fan of coke because he doesn't feel like it does anything for him though, he doesn't smoke, but will take edibles. LOVES to paint/draw/make art when he's high. he's not quote unquote addicted, and is really good at pacing himself/saying no/knowing when to stop, but when he doesn't have to do drug tests for Exy? he's living his best life

heart-crushing and awful, but fun to inflict on friends: listen. at this point we understand my opinions on jeremy's past but. the reason why he doesn't swear is because his family/brother(s) used to swear at him so much as a kid that he just genuinely hates it. he hates the way it sounds coming out of his mouth. he doesn't like it, he doesn't think it's attractive, he just thinks swearing is unnecessary and actively chooses not to swear. (that doesn't mean he doesn't, but it's so rare that he does - if you ever, ever, ever hear jeremy knox swearing, then he is PISSED. he is livid. he is im-going-to-kill-a-man levels of angry. if you hear him swearing? run.)

unrealistic, but I will disregard canon about it because I reject canon reality and substitute my own: i feel like i haven't had enough time to live with jeremy knox to come up with incredibly niche canon disregarding hcs yet. probably kisses women when hes drunk. maybe he ties his shoes weird. needs glasses but refuses to get his eyes tested. doesn't have a gag reflex. actually hates the way he looks in red. i don't know!!!! ask me again once he's been living in my brain a little longer

[sobbingstars]

SEASON 4 UMBRELLA ACADEMY SPOILERS!!!

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Hi! WHAT THE FUCK! My hot takes on this latest season bc if I don’t say these I’m gonna go insane.

Luthor: becoming a dancer was really funny. It was also kinda nice bc he was so ashamed of his body b4 when he was part monkey, so it’s good to see him being more comfortable in his own skin. And speaking of him being part monkey, that had NOTHING TO DO WITH HIS POWERS. His powers are SUPER STRENGTH, his father INJECTED HIM WITH MONKEY DNA OR SMT TO SAVE HIS LIFE. Made NO SENSE!

Diego: Diego being an absent/emotionally neglectful/bad father made NO SENSE! We saw him with Stan, he learned to be a father. Plus, he had his own issues with his dad, of course he would mentally do everything he could to avoid being his father. And also, him and Lila being in an unhappy marriage was so weird. Like, man was literally obsessed w/ her in season 3. What???

Alison: So we decided to not address any of her wrongs and just forgive her. She ASSAULTED LUTHOR. She tried to KILL VICTOR. SHE KILLED HARLAN. SHR TEAMED UP WITH REGGIE. Nothing??? Just forgive her for reasons??? That being said, Claire bear you were STUNNING thank you for being here and thank you Millie Davis, you were my childhood. But also, girl??? Show some support for your uncle. He needs help sometimes, just bc he’s immortal doesn’t mean he doesn’t have feelings :(

Klaus: I actually think they didn’t go super wrong with Klaus. Him becoming super paranoid after losing his powers made sense bc he died like every other day and just didn’t notice bc he just kept coming back, so I’d be afraid of everything too. And I think him being scared to have his powers again bc he was afraid he’d relapse is honestly so in character. That being said, fake that he didn’t even consider talking to Dave once he was sober and had his powers and wasn’t actively trying to stop the end of the world. And yall don’t even know how upset I was when he started levitating with his SHOES ON. NOT COMIC ACCURATE.

Five: WORDS DONT DESCRIBE MY RAGE. BECOMING A CIA AGENT? WHEN THE WORLD WASN’T ACTIVELY ENDING AND HE COULD JUST RETIRE? YOU KNOW AT LEAST ON OF HIS SIBLINGS WOULD LET HIM STAY. AND FALLING IN LOVE WITH LILA?? IT MADE NO SENSE, WAS SO OUT OF CHARACTER EHRN HE LITERALLY WAS LIKE ‘Lila would be stupid to throw away her happy life’ AND PROCEEDED TO WRECK HER HAPPY LIFE? I GET THAT IT WAS SEVEN YEARS BUT GOD DAMN FIVE, YOU WERE MARRIED TO DOLORES FOR THIRTY! AND THEY DIDNT EVEN BRING HER UP! NOT ONCE! AND JUST GIVING UP AND LETTING THE WORLD END? FOR FUNSIES? ABANDONING HIS FAMILY? NOT GIVING TWO SHITS? MAN ENDED THE WORLD THREE TIMES TRYING TO SAVE HIS FAMILY! HIS FAMILY IS ONE OF THE ONLY THINGS HE CARES ABT AND HE WOULD NEVER EVEN CONSIDER GOING AFTER HIS BROTHERS WIFE! Five Hargreeves, they could never make me hate you, but what the FUCK!

Ben: So unrealistic that he didn’t break down any his siblings all being dead once. We deserved a heart between him and Five where Ben was like ‘All my family is dead’ and Fives like ‘I know how that feels’ bc his siblings were dead for 40+ years. Instead, he just had no character development at all and just died bc of a girl he met once. The only reason I was a little sad when he died was bc of season one and two Ben who was so sweet and amazing and season three Ben who just wanted to be loved and accepted. They didn’t even have any relationship development between him and Jennifer.

Victor: I’m sorry, he owns a BAR and was an awful boyfriend?? WHAT!? I was hoping we were gonna have this emotional scene where he plays the Violin again bc he hasn’t played it since he ENDED THE WORLD in season one, and he would be happy bc Violin was a genuine passion of his and he was gonna no longer be afraid. And being a bad boyfriend?? Unrealistic, he was so kind and good with kids??? Are you kidding??? That being said I really liked when he stood up to Reggie. That was rlly funny.

Lila: Yall know what I’m gonna say. You just KNOW. I GET that transitioning from full time assassin to full time mom would be a hard switch but you’re telling me she WOULDN’T have ANY sort of job? NONE??? With all her family being back in her life? She’d just sit in the house? And she wouldn’t sit in the house and be unhappy. She would absolutely call Diego out on his shit and complaining problem and he’d be like ‘Yes ma’am.’ Bc their relationship was so fun in season two and three and then they made it into a no-fun, unhappy marriage, and Lila just had so little of her original personality. And her liking Five was so weird. She sees him as a KID. He LOOKS like a kid. Made no sense.

Reggie: Actually wasn’t a total ass this season. Got into a malewife/girlboss relationship. Managed to actually have feelings. That being said, why how the fuck was he an ALIEN IN SEASON TWO??? I get that his wife was the one with the weird power things, but they just??? Never explained it??? What was going on??? I was so confused this ENTIRE SEASON.

[spiderprincess-suffet]

I way not be able to draw stuff for my au rn but I can make text posts! Sooo

KIDS PROBLEMS - AN AU EXPLANATION

In my au the Mansion acts more as a base of sorts Slender lives in it full time and has rooms for all his proxies but the proxies themselves don’t HAVE to live there and most actually choose not to instead opting to live all over the place Some stay in midrelm some live in normal town’s city’s abandoned houses non abandoned houses some live on the road and in their cars and many more places.

A lot of proxies also come from bad childhoods and are often nicer to the younger proxies because of this, many of the adult proxies find themselves adopting or simply just looking after the kiddie pastas as even tho they could leave them unattended they often know from experience how badly that can fuck a kid up just leaving them to fend for themselves in this sort of environment.

While yes most proxies try to give these kids somewhat decent lives all these characters have issues and these issues like it or not can have an affect on the children they look after.

So heres a post explaining SOME of the aus characters and what their problems are.

Sally: Sally is actually quite confident and okay with her past she used to see what happened as something to be ashamed of like she deserved it and as a result it made her hate her own body constantly covering up never accepting the idea of crushes or anything remotely romantic, but as she got older and after she fell under the care of Kate she began working out those issues accepting that what happened was bad but not her fault, she’s now a lot more confident she’s not afraid to wear more revealing things like tank tops or shorts without feeling ashamed of it, she’s a lot more open about romance and actually goes out of her way to learn about it to make sure she can spot red flags and green flags in relationships and help others from being potentially taken advantage of.

But no matter how hard she tries that fear that worry will never fully go away, she’s only 12 right now and has a long way to go in regards to fully healing, she feels awful for not being able to fully bond with and trust Tim Brian and Toby like Kate seemingly can and she knows they’re good people who don’t want to hurt her, but she’s always going to be worried not just for her sake but also Kate’s, as much as Kate tried to raise her in a loving environment they were living in a very physically unstable one, constantly moving worrying about money and safe places to sleep living in Kate’s car a good portion of the time. And Sally was there for all of it , She doesn’t want Kate to be in any risk anymore and that includes being cautious of her new roommates.

Nina: Nina was only 10 when her life was destroyed over the boy she thought she actually had a chance with, Jeff weather you like it or not is a bad person in this au, tho he didn’t start that way he was raised by very distant and selfish individuals who were more worried about their money and status than their own kids. Because of this Jeff thought Nina being obsessed with him was cool, he liked having a mini me who looked up to him and would do anything he said, so what if you can’t actually stand her and are just manipulating her to keep her around where else is she gonna go she killed her own parents to be here?

So yeah Nina while living with Jeff wasn’t doing so good Jeff was an asshole she was a child Liu just stood back cuz he didn’t wanna be involved and Jane hates her, for a good majority of her life she felt trapped with Jeff it was like walking on eggshells, she thought she’d be happier living like this but she wasn’t and it was only getting worse…until Nurse Ann got involved, Ann had fallen for a similar situation in the past and she knows how dangerous it can be so she ended up with a soft spot for Nina the more she realized her situation, so currently Nina has been taken in by Ann and Dr.Smiley it’s not much Nurse Ann tries to help but she is still a pretty mean person she’s encouraging Nina to be strong and take action against Jeff and not to let herself get hurt anymore but in the process is also making Nina more cold hearted she’s basically learning how to set boundaries with people but in a way that way to aggressive witch with Jeff would he understandable but this isn’t just towards him it’s with everyone.

Lazari: Lazari..is complicated, She finds herself hating herself she wants so badly to be a normal person but at the same time doesn’t feel like one, she hates being a demon and yet she finds comfort in all the demonic stereotypes she was told to hate, she’s lost in an angry confusion she’s both human and demon and angry at both halves of herself, the human side told her that it was a crime she was even born they locked her away and treated her like something to be ashamed of, and the demon half shows no remorse her father was nothing but evil in her eyes even Slenderman the demon that took her in has done such horrible things, she has always clung onto the idea that she could be a good person because she was half human and humans aren’t like demons right. But humans were the ones who gave her those scars on her back humans were the reason she’s now trapped as a Proxy because she knew if she didn’t she’d have nowhere else to go…she didn’t want to but the older she gets and the more she learns about demons the more she starts to decide that maybe she should give into them, embrace the stereotypes and be the demon all those humans had hated for so long, because at the end of the day demons are just animals trying to survive and she’s trying to survive to.

Ben: a lot like Lazari Ben also doesn’t feel human but he tends to show the most sympathy towards people because of this, as far as he’s aware he’s dead and lives on as some sort of tech based ghost and technology doesn’t feel emotions technology isn’t human, and neither is he. So he takes on the pain of his friends as no reason he should be bothered by it right yeah sure he shouldn’t care but they need someone to talk to and he’s the least likely to be bothered by their emotions to the point of it affecting his own emotions because well, he doesn’t have any he’s non human and so he doesn’t have emotions…or at least he keeps trying to convince himself, but the more he listens the more he learns the angrier he gets he hates the people who hurt his friends even if he’ll never admit it even if he’ll never admit that he actually does see them as friends, he cares about people he feels emotions but he doesn’t feel like he SHOULD even if he says that it doesn’t bother him and he doesn’t actually care and that he’s just a weird Ai ghost who can’t feel anything cuz he’s not real won’t change the fact that he was REAL he was a real kid who died he was a real kid who had his life taken away and doesn’t want to accept the fact he’s dead.

Ight that’s all I got so far there are a lotttt of characters and I could go on endlessly about who affects who and why characters act how they do and why so and so is friends with so and so but all this typing is giving me a headache 💀

[littledollll]

Hi honey! It's your fave anon ever hehe

Can I request cg!larissa x little!borderline!reader?

Maybe R has had an awful day, like every insecurity rising to the surface and she's on the verge of splitting but she really doesn't want to so when Larissa comes home, she sees that R has locked herself in the bathroom accidentally scaring Larissa but actually she was just isolating herself because she was terrifked Larissa would see her as a monster, but actually Larissa knowa of it all and loves R more than anything so she weasles her way into the bathroom with a blanket and a paci and lots of little stuff and R just ends up regressing and safely avoiding splitting as Larissa takes care of her and falls asleep on her chest and gets carried to bed? I'm sorry if this is too much

-🧸 anon

Forever? Forever.

Larissa Weems x little!bpd!reader

Extra prompt- “R is anxious when Isa is busy and fully develops into an attack but they try to mask until they just leave the room knowing they can't do it much more. Isa, can't follow yet and feels so bad because she knows her little has abandonment issues so will interpret it the situation as being left. Then we get upset little drawing pictures to show feelings and comforting momma isa” -🕊️anon

A/n: Hi its 1:30 am when I’m writing this! back at it again my friends. It’s nice to be (sorta) up to date with requests again! Also 🧸anon i see u 👀 I swear ur like 3/5 requests I have, it’s truly an honor.

Warnings: mentions of splitting, anxiety, overthinking, abandonment issues, little r, momma Larissa, comfort.

Dear 🧸anon, can I bring you back to life with the gift of a fluffy Larissa fic?

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A busy Larissa wasn’t something new, usually as much as you hated it, it didn’t cause much of a problem. You found ways to be with her even as she worked her life away and you’ve grown quite used to it. The problem was today. You couldn’t quite pinpoint what exactly triggered your anxiety, you just felt alone, abandoned even though in the back of your mind you were well aware of Larissa’s affections for you.

Anxiety was always quick to push you into splitting, you couldn’t have that. Not now that you’ve been doing better, not while Larissa is cluelessly busy working. She was supposed to be home soon as well. What was taking so long? Did she not want to come home to you? Overthinking was always your worst enemy, specially now.

Naturally, you hid. Having Larissa see you in this state wasn’t going to be of any help, specially if you acted out against her. At the same time you missed her so badly. You just wanted her to hold you and tell you how much she still loved you. But you hid. If she wanted you she’d come looking for you right? That was your logic anyways.

You locked yourself in the bathroom of your shared room, bringing your knees up to your chest and hiding your face between them. You didn’t really have much else to do, just wait it out, just wait for the anxiety and that feeling of a split coming on to fade away, it wouldn’t. You closed your eyes. You felt like crying, and what was the point in holding back now?

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You hadn’t noticed you fell asleep until the sound of Larissa calling for you startled you awake, then your heard it again followed by the shaking of the doorknob. “Darling- are you in here? could you just answer me so I know you’re okay?” You could hear the concern in her voice and willed yourself to unlock the door, still giving her no reply.

She let herself in, seeing your tear stricken face she immediately kneeled down and cupped your face. “My sweet girl, why are you crying what’s wrong?” You couldn’t bring yourself to explain, not mentally or physically and Larissa immediately knew. She kissed your forehead and stood, walking out to the bedroom.

This left you confused. Was she leaving you? If she was why would she kiss you so gently before doing so? It just made you want to cry more, you curled into yourself and did just that.

Larissa was at your side in mere seconds. Pulling you into her lap and offering up your paci and one of your stuffies. “Momma just needed to get some things for her baby, you see?” you nodded, hiding into her neck. “no leavs” Larissa sighed, hugging you tightly. “No my darling. Mommas not going anywhere, I promise. I apologize for leaving so suddenly without explaining.”

You sat there as she rubbed your back for god knows how long. She didn’t pull away until all your cries were soothed, your stuffie hugged between your bodies and paci in your mouth. Her always calm voice felt so comforting as she shushed your cries and eased every single one of your worries with quiet reassurance. She held your face studying you and then squinted at you, managing to pull a quiet giggle from you.

“My pretty little one, you know there’s nothing in this world momma loves more than her baby right?” You gave her a little gasp and shyly snuggled into her chest “It’s true. You’re my little treasure and momma absolutely adores you!” you hugged her as tightly as you could and responded as if it was a secret, “I adores momma evn mores”

“There’s absolutely no way! You’re my precious girl, I have all the love in the world just for you.” It was exactly what you needed. Being held and reassured by her for however long you asked.

You comfortably curled up in her arms, wanting to sleep off your headache from all the crying and Larissa was quick to carefully carry you into bed. She laid with you on her chest, the sound of her heartbeat calming you further. Just as you closed your eyes Larissa spoke again in a soft tone.

“Rest well my sweet girl, momma loves you” you nuzzled further into her, “forevers?” “Forever.” It was the perfect goodnight.