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lonelyreputation · 4 years

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Different (part four)

A/N: WOW! So much later than anticipated!! My apologies! Took me some time to write & edit! But here ya go 💫 Part ~four 🥳 There’s only one more part after this, woot woot!!

THANKS A MILLION FOR ALL OF YOUR LOVELY WORDS AND KIND MESSAGES!!! 🤗💞🌻 I appreciate all of you to no end I love you all so much 🤧 I’d love to hear your thoughts!!

REQUEST/PROMPT: Unrequited Love

Part ONE | Part TWO | Part THREE

Let’s Chat!! | MASTERLIST | Add Yourself To My Taglist!

Warnings: Few swear words

WC: 4.1K // only a ~smidge of angst

It had been two months since you started walking in a different park; two months since Shawn had spilled tea on you. Two months since your last contact with him. And while it initially hurt seeing him, after a few days, you were starting to feel somewhat normal.

While two months felt like a blink of an eye, it had been a total of eight months since you last really saw Shawn. Eight months since that explosive argument where you put it all on the line for him and he cut you loose. Well, you cut yourself out from his life, but that was because you knew it was to keep your sanity above anything else.

It took some time adjusting to a new park, but all in all, you found it more peaceful than the last. And that was probably due to the fact that you now had a walking partner. Since Brian took you out for coffee, he weaved his way back into your life. So for the last two months, you had spent it drinking an insane amount of caffeine, and getting some light exercise with Brian.

It felt nice rekindling your friendship with him. While at the time, it made sense to cut anyone out of your life who connected you to Shawn, now you saw how much of a mistake that was. Because as you walked into the frigid February air, feeling as if icicles were hitting your skin, you finally had a close enough friend you felt comfortable confiding your secrets in.

“I’m seeing someone,” you dug your mitten-clad hands further into your jacket pocket as the wind picked up.

For a second, you thought the wind had picked up your secret, but when you turned your head to look at Brian, there was a very concentrated look on his face. You elbowed his side, and he was brought out of whatever world he found himself in, as a smile lit up his face, “That’s––Wow, Y/n, that’s great.”

“Thanks,” you shrugged off his forced tone of excitement.

While his smile was genuine you could see it in his eyes, and hear it in his voice, that he was thinking something different.

“Who’s the lucky guy?”

Another howl of wind came through as you tilted your head down and to the side, bracing the cold impact, you almost didn’t hear the word lucky.

You waited until the wind died down to speak up, “His name’s Charlie.” And a soft smile made its way across your face as you thought about the date he took you on two nights ago, “He’s really sweet.”

The wind picked up again when you were explaining to Brian how you met him through a mutual friend. And while you had only been seeing him for a little over a month, things were still casual between the two of you, but you could see the relationship progressing into something more serious.

In the past, you had been so hung up on your fantasy with Shawn––the clichè story of how the two best friends fell in love––that you brushed off every guy who tried to make an advance on you. And it wasn’t until you had spent the whole party laughing with Charlie that you realized Shawn never held back when it came to girls around him.

So this time, you weren’t holding back.

“I’m happy for you, really,” Brian threw an arm around your shoulder to give you a quick side hug, and it was the first time he sounded genuine, “You really deserve this.”

“Yeah,” it was the first time the wind decided to stay quiet, and you spoke confidently, “I do.”

The rest of your walk was silent as the two of you enjoyed the company of each other. There was something so soothing about not feeling pressured to fill the void of silence with noncommittal conversation. It was something you missed about having a best friend.

When you completed your walk, about to ask Brian when the next time he would be up for a walk, he cut you off, “We’re––I’m having a little get together in a few nights,” he rocked back on his heels, “You should bring your boyfriend.”

“He’s not my boyfriend,” you quickly corrected him.

Brian rolled his eyes, “But really, I’d like to meet him.” You nodded, keeping silent, because you knew that Brian was holding back on some key information. And with a sigh, he answered what you already expected to be true, “Shawn might stop by, but he said he didn’t know if he would be up for socializing.”

Even after eight months of voluntarily avoiding him, there was still a sharp zip of pain that stung your chest when you heard his name.

“It’s fine if he's there,” you tried to brush it off and act nonchalant, when on the inside, you were going absolutely insane, “I’m over him.” Brian raised his eyebrows, not believing your statement, and you let out a huff, “Fine, okay. Maybe I’m not totally over him, but…” you kicked up some dirt and whispered, “I’m really trying.”

Brian smiled and wrapped his arms around you, “That’s all that matters,” he squeezed you tight, “And if that new boy makes you happy then that’s a plus.”

“Yeah,” your voice was muffled from your head being buried into his puffy winter jacket, “I’m happy.”

///

You decided to invite Charlie to Brian’s get together.

You briefly mentioned it as an offhand comment as the two of you were doing dishes together; he was washing and you were drying. You held your hand out, expecting to be passed another plate, but were met with air. So when you looked up to see him stop mid-wash, with a smile on his face, you knew it was the right call to bring him and a smile instantly lightened up your face.

“So this is Brian’s place?” Charlie said as the two of you rode up the elevator.

He couldn’t keep the smile off his face as he was practically jumping up and down in the elevator. He was almost too excited to meet your friends while all you felt was nauseous. All of the worst case scenarios ran through your head and everything kept circling back to Shawn.

What if Shawn was there? What would Shawn do? Would Shawn care? Did Shawn even know you were seeing someone?

But you shook your head clear of all the ‘what ifs.’ You were done focusing on those eight months ago.

When the elevator dinged onto Brian’s floor, you couldn’t help but return Charlie’s infectious smile as you grabbed a hold of his hand and walked off the elevator.

Walking down the hallway to Brian’s apartment felt like an eternity, but when you got to the door with 643 nailed onto it, you could hear the hoots and hollers of insanity. You didn’t bother knocking as you turned the door knob and came face-to-face with Brian, down on one knee, chugging whatever he had in the red solo cup.

Once finished, he threw the cup onto the ground as people around him cheered. You looked at Charlie with raised eyebrows and an apologetic smile, “That’s Brian––”

“Y/n!”

You weren’t able to finish your sentence as your hand was ripped away from Charlie’s and you were brought into a bone crushing hug.

“Oh, Y/n I’ve missed you,” Brain fake cried into your shoulder.

“It’s been two days,” you patted his shoulder and looked back at Charlie who had an amused smile on his face.

“Too long,” Brian laughed as he let you out of his hold and turned around, “You must be Charlie.”

He nodded his head and took Brian’s outstretched hand in his. They exchanged pleasantries and talked for a few moments before you excused yourself to get a drink from the kitchen. You were in the middle of making yourself a vodka coke when Charlie slid up next to you.

Automatically a smile made its way onto your face as you handed him a sip of your drink. He took a sip and scrunched his nose up, “Did you put any coke in that?” You threw your head back in laughter and took the cup from his hand, “Is getting through a night with me so hard you need that much alcohol?”

From the glint in his eyes and the teasing tone he spoke with, you knew he was joking. But you weren’t going to lie to yourself and say that you were just taking precautionary measures in case Shawn decided to show up.

Charlie tapped his fingertips on the top of your hand, and you flipped your hand over, palm facing upwards as he slotted his fingers with yours.

You smiled up at him, “I would never need that much alcohol for you.”

He let out a laugh as he reached over the counter and grabbed a regular soda can. When you offered him alcohol to mix with his drink he shook his head and said something along the lines of being the designated driver.

But his words were lost on you as you heard someone call out your name.

“Y/n?” The crack of the soda can wasn’t loud enough to drown out the voice you hadn’t heard since he spilled tea on you.

Your eyes widened, and your first thought was that you hadn’t had enough to drink yet to face him. Charlie looked down at you, with a mixture of concern and amusement, as you downed half of your drink before facing your ex-best friend.

“Shawn, hey,” you tried your best to smile as he stood in front of you in the red shirt you bought him for his twenty-first birthday, “How are you?”

He looked a little shocked as he stared at the half-empty cup on the counter he saw you make just minutes before. But then you saw his eyes glance over to your hand intertwined with Charlie’s. It was a subtle look, but his dumbfounded expression morphed into one of confusion as he scrunched his eyebrows together.

He opened and closed his mouth like a fish, thinking he found the right words to say, but backtracking because he knew anything he said wouldn’t be good enough.

“Charlie,” you cleared your throat, “This is Shawn, and Shawn this is, Charlie, we’re––”

“Hey,” Shawn interrupted you before you could define your relationship status in front of him, “Nice to meet you.”

Charlie smiled, excited to meet another one of your friends, “Hey man, love your music.”

There was always part of you that thought it would’ve been better if you told Charlie the whole truth about your friendship with Shawn, so that he’d understand how much you didn’t want to hear him genuinely compliment his music. But all that you revealed to Charlie was that Shawn had been a friend for a few years; nothing less and definitely nothing more.

A tight smile formed on Shawn’s face, but his eyes were dull, “Appreciate it.”

Charlie untangled your fingers and threw the arm around your shoulder, pulling you in close to his side, “This one always skips it when it comes on shuffle.”

Charlie was the only one laughing. You stood frozen with your eyes wide staring at Shawn, as you felt your heart drop in your stomach. Shawn also stood frozen, but his eyes were wide with perplexion and a hint of sadness.

“I just think it’s weird hearing a friend singing unexpectedly on my phone,” you tried to play it off with a shrug and Shawn let out a weak laugh.

“She doesn’t even eat tacos,” he let out another laugh as he pressed a kiss to the top of your head, Shawn’s eyes narrowing in on the action, “This one,” he playfully rolled his eyes as he looked down at you with an affectionate smile, “She’s different.”

Your body froze up.

Different.

Shawn froze up as his eyes widened just a smidge. It seemed as though everyone at the party disappeared and you and Shawn were transported to the night you overheard him in the bathroom. She’s different, he said about you, she’s just a friend.

You had no reason to be upset. You were almost completely over your best friend who had broken your heart. But standing in between a guy who you currently had feelings for, and the guy who you used to love…That word made your skin crawl.

You tried to lighten the situation by laughing; it was forced, Charlie didn’t seem to notice as he joined in on your laughter, but with one look at Shawn…You knew he could tell you weren’t genuinely laughing.

Shawn only stayed for a few more moments before saying he saw someone he hadn’t seen in forever. With the pointed look in his eyes, and how he stretched out the word forever, you knew he was talking about you. But he seemed to grasp the awkwardness of the situation and let you be with Charlie.

He took a sip of his soda, “He seems really cool, does he have a girlfriend? Maybe we could double date.”

His comment was casual, with an obvious playful tone, but you felt your hands start to sweat and bile stinging the back of your throat. He had no idea, but that was your absolute worst nightmare. Hearing about all of his dates when you were best friends was torture enough. But to actually see him on a date?

“I’m just going to go to the bathroom,” you pressed a quick kiss on Charlie's lips and patted his chest, “I think Brian is in the living room?”

Charlie nodded his head enthusiastically and was already off searching for Brian before you left the kitchen. You finished the rest of your drink, throwing the plastic cup in the trash bin, before hastily making your way to Brian’s room. He always kept his room off limits during a party, but you knew he would let it slide for you.

You rushed in, closing the door softly behind you, and went to sit at the bottom of his bed. You leaned your elbows on your knees and rested your head in your hands.

You were over Shawn. You had someone else in your life who made you laugh, brought a smile to your face, and would surprise you with takeaway food and a movie when he knew you had a rough day. Charlie was nothing but kind and supportive of everything in your life, and you were upset with yourself because why couldn’t you love Charlie like you loved Shawn.

Charlie reciprocated your feelings; he was a good guy. So why, just moments ago, did you feel more butterflies in your stomach when Shawn was in front of you than you ever did standing next to Charlie?

The door creaked open, and you saw a sliver of the hall light creep into the dark room, “I know I’m not supposed to be in here, Brian, but I really needed to clear my head––”

“It’s not Brian.”

Your head shot up and you were met with Shawn staring at you. His hands were tucked into the front pockets of his black jeans, and while he tried to look as neutral as possible, he looked just as awkward as you felt moments ago. His eyes were darting around the dimly lit room and he was chewing on his bottom lip.

You knew that he felt awkward. You knew that he looked nervous. And you knew, from that one sentence, that he sounded discouraged.

“So,” he rocked back on his heels and then forward on his black boots, “You have a boyfriend?”

With a scoff you rolled your eyes, “Not that it’s any of your business, but he’s not my boyfriend.”

“So you just hold hands and kiss anyone now?”

You shrugged your shoulders in annoyance and rolled your eyes, “What––Why are you so worked up about this?”

He narrowed his eyes at you, “I’m not worked up––”

You raised an eyebrow, “Uh, yes you are,” you spoke as if it was the most obvious thing, “you followed me into a room.”

Without an excuse for your matter-of-fact point, he ran his fingers through his hair, “You made tour miserable.”

You let your mouth drop open,”Me?” You couldn’t help but let out a single laugh about how ridiculous that sounded, “I made tour miserable? I wasn’t even with you, Shawn. We weren’t talking––”

“Exactly! That’s how you made it miserable!” He said exasperatedly and threw his hands up, “How is it that you ruined touring and our friendship in the same month?”

Offended by his accusation, you stood up and pointed a finger at him, “You did that all by yourself.”

“Me?” Shawn mimicked your offended tone, “I wasn’t the one who fell in love with my best friend––”

All anger in your system left your body for a millisecond as you let your shoulders drop in sadness, “Are you really throwing that in my face right now?”

You felt crushed––absolutely shattered––that the person you once thought the world of would throw your feelings in your face in such a cruel way. He always gave advice to fans to chase after what they want, to not be afraid to fall in love, to be honest with their feelings. But behind closed doors with you? You couldn’t think of someone who was more hypocritical.

It took a second longer for Shawn to register the words that spewed out of his mouth. He knew he was in the wrong, he knew he shouldn’t have said those words as maliciously as he did, but he couldn’t take them back.

But when Shawn noticed something wasn’t going his way, he changed the subject, “Do you…” The glare in his eyes disappeared and you saw just how exhausted he looked, the moon shining through the window highlighted the small bags under his eyes, “Do you really not eat tacos anymore?”

It was a typical Shawn move; trying to remove himself as the root of the problem and that only fueled back up the anger in you.

You shot him a glare, “Write a fucking song about it.” You said it in the nastiest voice you could as you purposely bumped his shoulder with yours as you stomped passed him.

But before you could reach for the door handle, Shawn caught your elbow in his hand and you felt a type of warmth you hadn’t felt in nearly a year, “I did write a song.”

“I don’t care, Shawn,” you rolled your eyes and tried yanking your elbow from his hold, but it was no use, “Let’s just go back to the party.”

“When you’re ready.”

“I am ready to go back,” you stopped struggling against him and let out a defeated sigh, “We can just pretend you never followed me here and I’ll go back to––”

“That’s a song I wrote––”

You whirled around, wanting to be done with arguing with him, “No, shit––”

“–-For you.”

His hand dropped from your elbow the same time your mouth dropped open as the two minute and forty-nine second song zipped through your mind; Every single night my arms are not around you, my mind’s still wrapped around you––I’m waiting––What if my dad is right, when he says that you’re the one––I’m waiting––I’ll wait forever––Say the word––I know your heart like the back of my hand––I’m waiting.

But he didn’t wait.

“How––” You felt your throat tighten up as your voice cracked, “How can you say that to me right now?”

It was as if Shawn hadn’t realized that revealing the inspiration behind the song would backfire on him. You knew he didn’t think it through because he always told you stories when he told the girl what song he wrote about her and she would swoon.

“It’s a––It’s a sweet song,” Shawn stumbled over his words as he rambled, trying to get every single one of his thoughts out before you would eventually stop listening to him, “It’s how I felt about you––How I feel––Everyone loves when a song is written about them and I––I just thought––If you knew that that song is about you––”

“I told you I was ready and you––you didn’t…” you looked up at the one person you thought you would always give the entire world up for. The frown was evident on his face as he bit the inside of his cheek, glassy eyes looking down at you, “I‘m happy now.”

“I didn’t know that––”

You tried everything in your power to be angry at him, to throw words just as spiteful back at him that would cause him to lose sleep, just like he did with you, but all you felt was your heart breaking all over again.

“You wrote that song before I told you how I felt.”

“I know,” Shawn said exasperatedly, “I didn’t know how you felt–––”

“And you're telling me this now?” Your voice cracked as you felt the familiar sting pierce behind your eyes, “Because I have someone else in my life?”

“That’s not––”

“Do you know how manipulative that is?” You spoke on the verge of tears, feeling a lump begin to form, “I can’t keep doing this with you, Shawn.”

“Y/n, please, that wasn’t my intention,” Shawn’s voice was as desperate as the hold on your hand, “I miss you––I––I miss us.”

“This is why I needed space,” you croaked out, and as much as you wanted to shake off his hand, you found yourself craving the warmth of his touch, “We can’t work like this––”

“I won’t be an asshole,” he pleaded with you, as if that was the only fault in your broken friendship, “I won’t come between you and your boyfriend, I won’t push you to talk to me when you don’t want to, I won’t hurt––” He cut himself off before he made a false promise, “––I’ve never missed anyone as much as you.”

You could try and rationalize all the reasons why you shouldn’t miss him––because that list outweighed the reasons why you did miss him––but you knew that you would be lying to yourself. While your nightmares still centered around the day he let you down, your daydreams were filled with the familiar warm touches.

And holding his hand loosely in yours, now that you were reacquainted with the warmth, you didn’t know if you could live without it again.

“If––If we do become friends again,” you softly whispered, “We…” The light squeeze of your hand caused you to look up at him after your sentence drifted off. His eyes were so full of hope, full of desire, that it killed you to say your next words, “I’ll need to think about it.”

“I’ll take it,” Shawn’s voice was small, “I just––Did you miss me at all?”

With a sad smile, you nodded your head, “Everyday.”

And with that, you dropped his hand and made your way out of Brian’s room and back to the liveliness of the party. It didn’t take you long to find Charlie, seeing as he was standing next to Brian shouting out in excitement as he sunk a ping-pong ball into a red solo cup. You rolled your eyes and made your way over to the rambunctious duo.

“Thought you weren’t drinking?” Your voice was directed at the boy you came to the party with, but your eyes trailed on a very tired looking Shawn as he came out from the hallway.

His eyes met yours in a longing stare as you saw his eyes shift to the person who had just thrown an arm around you, showing you the inside of his cup, “Just water.”

You forced out a laugh as your eye contact with Shawn dropped when someone handed him a drink, “Responsible.”

Throughout the whole night, your eyes were always drawn to Shawn and the red solo cup he had only taken one sip out of. And if your eyes weren’t on him, you felt his eyes on you.

As you were sitting on the couch with Charlie, your head leaning on his shoulder, you closed your eyes and laughed at the funny story he told. He was a hit with your friends, and nothing could’ve made you happier in that moment. When you were listening to one of your other friends pitch in their funny story, Charlie gazed down at you and sneaked a quick kiss.

The kiss was sweet, not lasting more than a second, but when he pulled away and joined in on the conversation around you, your eyes automatically found the back of a red shirt as he weaved through the crowd. Your eyes didn’t leave him until he closed the door behind him.

Maybe there was something that could’ve made you happier in that moment.

Taglist: @http-isabela, @musicalkeys, @adelaidestreets, @alina--jpeg, @fallinallincurls, @lights-on-mendes, @mendesficsxbombay, @now-that-i-saw-u, @particularnarry, @shawnmendez, @shawnsmutual, @turtoix, @vinylmendes, @5-seconds-of-mendes, @pupsandducks @musicalkeys

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erzastone · 6 years

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#49 Not sick Bday month and 1 left

I have been restored to factory settings well almost . Still got a lower back problem . Really dont know what is wrong with it or how it happend. For two weeks now I've been just going along with it. Working through the pain and hoping it will fix itself. I really should go see a doctor but I probly wont since I know I'll get the same old answer I always do. That being your fine just stretch drink water walk it off. If I was dieing they would probly say walk it off. It's like one of the many things people say that just pisses you off. Someone ever say calm down to you while ur angry. That just fuels the fire and make u more pissed off. Anyways it is friday and my work day is over. Amazing really makes you wanna just punch some drywall and to fuck yea. Long weekend incoming some exciting shit really. Cant wait to shower sit down and relax . Maybe have a beer or some wine and build some shit in sansar. My new hobby social game. Love the fact that I can make objects and stuff and build my own games . Really fun and makes me think alot which fires up the creative brain.

Also my birthday is coming up this month woot. Going to relax and do alot of nothing . Well not exacly nothing since I am going to build some more experiences and work on my main world. Maybe have a party in sansar too. We will see when that weekend comes. I will be 28 years old and 2 years away from big 30. I am getting old lol well not really but some would say so. I think I am doing okay for myself though considering I am a millienal. Alot of millenials are just lost for words. You could way there a lost cause. Dont know why that is but that's what I've heard . It's not all of us that are just so far gone . Some of us actually want to succeed in life. Anyways so I am going to do something for my birthday just not sure what. I got a nice computer chair from my lover which is awsome. Nice early back laxing chair. Much better then the crap I was sitting on before. Not sure what ells I'll be getting probly 100bucks from my parents . Well see honestly I dont expect much from anyone . It's just a stupid day that happens once a year. It's an excuse for me to tell everyone to leave me alone while I get drunk and play videos games. Dont know what more to say about it . Except its Halloween month and I haven't started my costume. I was going to do spawn this year but I dont think I have the time to do it . Might just do spawn for anime north next year. Sounds like a plan. Maybe some scary makeup this year. Well have to wait and see.

Here we are once again at the end of the blog post. Trying to think of something to write about really. Standing near a yellow line waiting for a train. 10 people to my left and over 100 to my right. Then train gets here and i get in . Lucky not crowded today and I get a seat. Metal with a fabric thingy on top . Super uncomfortable just makes me wanna knaw your own ass off. Just kidding I fall asleep in these metal back breaking shit seats. Cant wait to get home and shower ugh just covered in dust. Anyways so I am almost at 50 posts and this is 49 I believe so let me just say it's been a blast. Writting about my daily life and other stuff that is on my mind. I will be starting a book / Novel series and we will see how it goes. Hope I get really into it and wip up something awsome . Something people will want to read and be craving the next chapters. So that it. One more of these posts left. I said I would do 100 but 50 is enough I think because i am running out of stuff to talk about and i want to try and write a book . I think it would be alot of fun too

To you all who read this Cheers and thanks again for reading these 50 posts.

-Erzastone

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the-adventures-of-kailz · 7 years

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2017 in Review

What did you do in 2017 that you’d never done before?

Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year? I’ve reserved myself to no resolutions because not accomplishing things causes me more depression and anxiety.

Did anyone close to you give birth? Uuuuuhhhhh....I think, like, 3 people I used to be close to?

Did anyone close to you die? I think 2 older people almost did...but didn’t? A couple of family friends have been diagnosed with cancer...

What countries did you visit? None.

What would you like to have in 2018 that you lacked in 2017? A well-paying, worthwhile career; all of my debt paid off; travel....yeah...

What dates from 2017 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? The end of May, when I said goodbye to my old housemates. June 19th, when I started officially dating Ana. August 19th, when one of my new and now ex-housemates got alcohol poisoning and nearly died at my surprise birthday party. September when I found out I couldn’t afford (yet again) to finish my classes for my degree. November, when my now ex-housemates kicked me out and I was immediately taken in by my friend Lynn and had a bunch of other people trying to help.

What was your biggest achievement of the year? ...nothing?

What was your biggest failure? My whole existence.

Did you suffer illness or injury? Luckily, NO! Woot!

What was the best thing you bought? IIIIICE CREEEEEEEAAAAAAAAM

Whose behavior merited celebration? All of my friends who came to my rescue/supported me after getting kicked out of my other place. That includes emotional support!

Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? Pretty much all of my ex-housemates. They handled the whole kicking me out thing (followed by me taking all of MY shit) very poorly. Aaaaaaaaand now we’re not friends anymore. Sucks for theeeeeeeeeem!

Where did most of your money go? Bills....and then I had none.

What did you get really, really, really excited about? Nothing really?

What song will always remind you of 2017? I listen to so much music all the time that there’s honestly no notable song that would trigger memories of 2017.

Compared to this time last year, are you: (a) happier or sadder? (b) thinner or fatter? (c ) richer or poorer? (a) Sadder... (b) About the same. My weight fluctuates, but not drastically. (c) Monetarily poorer, but so much richer in life thanks to my friends.

What do you wish you’d done more of? Work. Travel. Create happy memories.

What do you wish you’d done less of? Self-pity. Wallowing in depression. Letting my anxiety dictate my actions.

How did you spend Christmas? Chilling, cooking, baking, hanging out with my awesome friend Lynn.

Did you fall in love in 2017? I mean...sort of? Not really love, more like mutual like. I finally got a girlfriend! That might be ending soon, though...

What was your favorite TV program? I binged so many shows on Netflix, but Legend of Korra?

Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year? My ex-housemates.

What was the best book you read? Oh shit....I DON’T THINK I READ ANYTHING AWESOME NOOOO

What was your greatest musical discovery? None.

What did you want and get? I wanted a girlfriend, and I got one.

What did you want and not get? Financial stability.

What was your favorite film of this year? WONDER WOMAN.

What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? I went to Red Robin with my gf and we both redeemed our birthday burgers since her birthday was the day before mine and the vouchers last the whole month! We both turned 25.

What one thing made your year immeasurably more satisfying? Uuuuuuhhhh

How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2017? Confused. Futch? Still severely lacking any sort of fashion sense.

What kept you sane? My friends!

Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? Gal Gadot......I’m so gay....

Who did you miss? My dad, my younger brother Alex, my friends @evilqueenofarendelle and @artsyblue, and (frustratingly) my mom.

Who was the best new person you met? @weeaboo-hime!!!! I’m so glad we get to be friends! You’re so much fun to hang out with and talk with and everything! You and your boy! And because I can’t choose just one person: I’m also so glad I got to meet @theofficialolive and @thegirlnoonetalksabout!! Coolest freshman I’ve ever had the chance to get to know! All of ya’ll are precious beans!

Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2017. Don’t lean on anyone for financial support unless you know for sure that you can pay them back within a couple of months. Don’t trust the IRS to actually file your amended return on time or ever. You find who your true friends are when your struggle bus crashes and burns.

Quote a song lyric that sums up your year. Any lyrics I put down would be super depressing so I’m not gonna choose any...

#personal #got tagged by a friend #might as well #2017 #year in review #the last few years have been such trainwrecks #trying hard to make 2018 fabulous!#positive vibes create positive change

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kingofthewilderwest · 7 years

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Rules: Answer these 92 statements and tag 20 people. I was tagged by @dyannehs

LAST:

1. Drink: Water 2. Phone call: Myself. Because I lost my cell phone. Outside of that, my mom! 3. Text message: One of my awesomeful friends of awesomeness who I’ve nicknamed Hux (she’s the Hux to my Kylo!) 4. Song you listen to: A nerdy composition project I’m working on. *grins* It’s a secret ’cause I’m gonna share online when I’m done! 5. Time you cried: Actual-actual cry? Don’t remember. Tears in the eyes? Maybe like two days ago? Yay for being broke.

HAVE YOU:

6. Dated someone twice: Yes, I have dated the same person twice, and both experiences were quite wonderful indeed! And I’d probably date her a third time if life came around to it - both times we broke up came from us being too timid to do basic communication about relationship goals. We’re still really good friends rn - honestly either as friends or as dates, I’m happy either way! 7. Kissed someone and regretted it: Yes 8. Been cheated on: Not in the sex way, but my first relationship ended because my current gf was hitting blatantly on someone in front of my face, and while we were talking about maybe doing a poly thing, this hitting-on-someone-else was in the venue of putting aside and ignoring me, and that wasn’t okay. 9. Lost someone special: Yes. 10. Been depressed: Oh shit I forgot my depression meds again... *runs to take them* Umm. Yes. The answer’s yes. High-functioning depression, here I am, prime example. Yayyyy [sarcasm] 11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: I don’t drink alcohol so nope.

LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS:

12. Silver 13. Chocolate brown 14. Black

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

15. Made new friends: Aye! 16. Fallen out of love: Not really? I mean I don’t know how to explain it. 17. Laughed until you cried: Thanks to Lance and Kaltenecker, yes. 18. Found out someone was talking about you: I guess my coworkers thought I was quitting instead of just reducing my hours, so I had to fix that rumor chain straight. 20. Found out who your friends are: I think that’s always an ongoing thing in life. This year, I’d say that I’ve had reaffirmations that the people I care about care about me, so that’s really awesome. It’s wonderful to know that people are thinking of me. And I’m thinking of you, friends! 21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: Yep!

GENERAL:

22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: About 99% of them. It’s very rare for me to add an internet friend to my FB contacts. 23. Do you have any pets: No. My apartment only allows cats and dogs, and I want guinea pigs again. ;_; 24. Do you want to change your name: I’m proud of my name and have used it as a source of inspiration (it means “pure”). That said, in the last few years, I feel increasingly distanced from my name and honestly think of myself far more as being named “Haddock.” Haddock is my name, my birth name is second. Still a good name, but I’m a Haddock. 25. What did you do for your last birthday: On the day itself: relaxed, bought myself froyo, Skyped family, chilled, was awesome. The general-ish week of my birthday: had a dinner with family, stayed up and binged all of VLD S4 the night it came out, hung out with a friend and also binged VLD. Basically, a lot of VLD. 26. What time do you wake up: The number fluctuates quite wildly day-per-day because “sleep schedule” is a myth. Today, I got up at 11 AM. 27. What were you doing at midnight last night: Answering asks on tumblr and PMing/texting a few good friends. 28. Name something you can’t wait for: Having enough money to live comfortably and not stress every time rent week comes around. 29. When was the last time you saw your mom?: A few days ago, Friday. 30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: Oh where do I fucking start... Well. The biggest thing is I’d do is go back in time and prevent a terrifyingly bad argument/falling out with my ex/ex best friend that happened in 2011-2012, not because I want to still be friends with this person (I don’t anymore), but because the experience was very... traumatic... to both of us and I’d love us not to live with those mental scars. I’m still getting over those scars and it sucks. 31. What are you listening to right now: The composition I’m working on. 32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: Yeah. Don’t know anyone well named Tom, though. One of my coworkers is a Tommy if that counts? 33. Something that is getting on your nerves: There’s one wonderful friend of mine who’s going through a really challenging time. I want to help them so badly, but they’ve been closed off and hermitting themselves to the point I think it’s harmful for them, it’s hard to contact them to help them, and they live too far away for me to check on them in person easily. I want to do anything to see them in person to help, or to talk to them, or anything... sitting in silence makes me very worried because this wonderful human soul deserves all the love and support they can get for what they’re going through. 34. Most visited website: Tumblr, Facebook, Netflix, Google. 35. Mole/s: I have two bumps on my forehead, one to either side. I jokingly call them horns, but they’re not evenly lined up, and the one on my left is much larger than the one on my right. 36. Mark/s: Bellybutton scar from a second degree burning incident, lots of scars on my hands right now from falling on concrete two months back, lots of scars on my wrists from a whole bunch of whatnot (I even have one from my sophomore year of high school when a school binder scraped me?), oh. And I have basically leopard-speckled shoulders from countless acne/pimple scars. For unnatural marks... three tats! Plans to get at least two more. 37. Childhood dream: To be a published, bestselling author or a college prof. 38. Hair color: Currently dark brown with bleached bangs and a strip on the right side. Natural hair color is what I call “dusty brown” and some people would call dirty blonde; it’s in that random in-between blonde and brown where the top is blonde-ish and the bottom is rather brown. 39. Long or short hair: I have the conundrum of enjoying my hair either really long or really short. I’m in the process of regrowing it to the long stage. It’s sort of at the bottom-of-the-shoulder-blades/boob length now. Goal is to go back to waist length. 40. Do you have a crush on someone: Does Takashi Shirogane count? 41. What do you like about yourself: Honestly, quite a lot? XD I’m very thankful to be a nerd who is apt to learn anything from sciences to arts and music and sports. I’m thankful to be a musician, a composer, a creative writer, an animation junkie, an analytical and logical mind, a complete and utter NERD beyond belief who lives in nerd culture. I love my appearance, I love my facial hair, I love my eyebrows and face shape, I love my body shape, I love that I’m left-handed, I love that I’m not conventionally pretty. I love being a Christian. I love being aroace. I mean when I’m not in a depressive, self-deprecating mode, I really am proud and thankful to be who I am all across the board; there’s very little that I dislike about myself. Mostly what I dislike is my current life situation of not being anywhere career-wise. Everything else, pretty happy. :) 42. Piercings: Two on each earlobe and one halfway up the cartilage. Dammit and I wanted like a dozen piercings by this type in my life. Get me a more stable paycheck and we’re fixing this! 43. Blood type: O+. Most common blood type, woot? 44. Nicknames?: I’ve had a terrifying slew of nicknames over the years. Currently, the most common ones are Haddock, King, (Kylo) Ren, Spock, and Toast. 45. Relationship status: Single in my chill natural habitat. 46. Zodiac: I am so bitter about my Zodiac sign I refuse to say it even though it’s not too hard to figure out what it is given other answers to this meme. 47. Pronouns: He/his/him, though honestly I really don’t care too much what people toss at me. 48. Favorite TV Show: Voltron: Legendary Defender. 50. Right or left hand: LEFT-HANDED WOOOOOOOO LEFT LEFT LEFT LEFT LEFT LEFT LEFT LEFT LEFT LEFTY PRIDE YOOOO! 51. Surgery: When I was nine I had four baby teeth and then the four adult teeth under them removed. Basically, a wisdom tooth like surgery but younger and with different teeth. 52. Hair dyed in different color: FUCK YEAH! I was getting really bored of my natural hair color but was keeping it natural for the purpose of looking professional (job searches). I’d been wanting to reinstate some purple and black again, but with my current job only allowing “natural” hair colors, I decided I couldn’t go that route. Instead I bleached the front and dyed the rest dark brown in a sort of inspiration from Takashi Shirogane. 53. Sport: I played soccer all growing up, so much fun. Love jogging. Sports are great, miss having the opportunity to do team stuff. Also really enjoy watching professional gymnastics, soccer, American football, and especially tennis. 55. Vacation: I want to see so many locations oh my fuck. My “to go to” list includes Bhutan, Nepal, China/Tibet, Mongolia, Cambodia (again... come on I miss it!), Thailand, Laos, Vietnam, Japan, United Arab Emirates, United Kingdom (England & Scotland), Norway, Canada, Peru, Mexico, South Korea, India, Myanmar, Austria, Germany, Iceland... um. Yeah. You. Get the picture. I NEED TO TRAVEL, YO! 56. Pair of trainers: Uh they’re like really raggedy and old and stuff

MORE GENERAL:

57. Eating: I’m snacking on M&Ms again, like always. 58. Drinking: Water, though methinks I shall make some homemade ginger tea. 59. I’m about to: Probably go shower. It’s 3 PM and I still am in my pajamas. 62. Want: To fucking write and do NaNo and yet life’s been busy and I haven’t had the time for a word but I HAVE SO MANY VLD FANFICS I WANT TO DO AND AURGHGHGHGHGHGH the goal is to somehow write and finish my universal translator mix-up one this month???? We’ll see! Translators, stay tuned, and thanks again for offering to help! 63. Get married: 97% of me doesn’t want to get married I think? 64. Career: Linguistics consultant of doom. Not sure if this can be a career but if I could, I would enjoy continuing the remote work. To explain: I currently work contract positions with various companies who hire me for short-term projects, in which I use my linguistics expertise to analyze and annotate large sums of data according to certain guidelines. 65. Hugs or kisses: Hugs. I. LOVE. HUGS. SO. MUCH. HUGGGGGMEEEEE! I always look closed off in my body language but I swear the inside of me is always going “Giff me the cuddles and don’t let go.” 66. Lips or eyes: Eyes. Eyes are the most gorgeous thing about humans seriously. 67. Shorter or taller: I prefer to be the short one in all social situations. 68. Older or younger: For friends, I’m chill with whatever age you are. Dating, also chill, though I think I tend to prefer being slightly older just ’cause that’s how most of my relationships have been? But really doesn’t matter. 70. Nice arms or nice stomach: Arms. Nice arms are unique for me. I’m pretty happy with lots of different stomach types I see - tummies just are cute! :) 71. Sensitive or loud: A combo is fun but what I look for most in any platonic or anything relationship is someone with a deep heart. I want friends with whom I can confide in anything... so has to be that sensitive side (sensitive-logical if that makes sense is what I like best). 72. Hook up or relationship: I’ve done random PG hookups? But my answer for this is relationship; hookups are only fun for short-term boosts of self-confidence and not being 100% genuine and just being like carefree “whatever” for a night (make sure you both know you’re just doing the hookup night though, please guys, no deception!). Long-term relationships though are glorious like none other for their emotional power. <3 That is pure beauty, caring for someone deeply with lasting loyalty. But of course ya’ll know me... I find nothing more beautiful to cherish than deep platonic care! 73. Troublemaker or hesitant: Combo of both!

HAVE YOU EVER:

74. Kissed a Stranger: Yeppers 75. Drank hard liquor: Nope 76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: Yes ugh I have no clue where one of my pairs of glasses are again 77. Turned someone down: Yes 78. Sex on the first date: I’ve had sex never so this is an easy answer 79. Broken someone’s heart: Yes 80. Had your heart broken: Yes 81. Been arrested: No 82. Cried when someone died: Yes 83. Fallen for a friend: Yes

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

84: Yourself: Yes, typically 85. Miracles: Absolutely 86. Love at first sight: I mean I don’t deny it happens. It happens. But I don’t think it’s pragmatic to think that’s what’ll happen to you. 87. Santa Claus: Come on, of course North and the Guardians are kicking Pitch’s butt! 88. Kiss on the first date: Sure, why not

OTHER:

90. Current best friend name: I don’t have one best friend right now. A few of my current closest friends are named Josh, “Hux”, Keith, JuLee, Rachel, Peter, and Meredith. 91. Eye color: Brown 92. Favorite movie: HOW DO I PICK ONE FAVORITE MOVIE FUCK YOU?? The Prince of Egypt, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, the How to Train Your Dragon movies, Pacific Rim, there, I made a list.

Uhhhhh let’s so who should I tag... if you want to do it... @akkeyroomi @the-mr-eggplant @chiefrosepetal @thefuriousnightfury @insaneskye @fanwriter02 @dragonpride99 @jettara @margarethelstone @shailyesshadow @hubwalker1 @godguy0001 @theravenfliesagain @frosty-viking @jackthevulture @hiccup-is-left-handed @dragonnan @spacekeet @nightfury326 yaknowwhat I am not going to count but we’ll say that’s about 20 XD

#non-dragons #long post #swearing #meme #ask meme #about me #blabbing Haddock #my life

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t-for-tobey · 5 years

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I’ve said it before but I usually look 90% on today, 9% on tomorrow, and 1% on the future.

Here’s my tentative plans for the rest of the year.

Tomorrow, Feb 7 I’m heading on my one month vacation to the southwest in my van. Going to Denver, then south to New Mexico and West to Arizona. Lots of hiking and sight seeing and camping in remote places and I know it’ll be a blast. I’ll post more about it when it comes.

March 10ish I’ll head back for NE. Brothers birthday is mid March. Bob Weir & Wolf Bros concert March 15 & 17 and then alumni basketball weekend the 22nd. Then spend a week chilling at the pond and with friends, etc.

I’m thinking I’ll ask my uncle if I can work construction in Lincoln, I’m sure they’ll need help- April, May, June. It’ll be good to see all the Lincoln friends during this time a lot! I’ll save a lot of money and just live in my van and park in different spots at night and I’m sure my friends wouldn’t care if I park in front of their place. I’ll use planet fitness like I do already, to shower, workout

May 23-27 family vacation in Branson

Follow Dead and Co across the Midwest and East for the summer tour. July 10- August 8

Tour ends in Boston the 8th so maybe hang out on the East Coast for a little while and work my way back to NE in late August.

September will be getting close to corn and soybean harvest again so I’ll live with Andi and Andrew when that comes for a month or so.

October 17th is heading to VA for Trey’s wedding with all the homies! Woot woot!

November, don’t know yet

December, hangout with my parents, family, friends for the holidays and most of the month

I’m sure more events will come up along the way that I’ll add and do.

Then comes 2021 and I’ll go from there.

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sophygurl · 7 years

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Woot! Tagged by my new we-finished-a-series-at-the-same-time-and-desperately-need-to-talk-about-it book buddy @blackandwhitemotley! (I seem to collect these - hi @wingedsaboteur)

1) Name/Nickname: Rosemary is my name. Soph or sophy tends to be a nickname to anyone who met me on the internets first for obvious reasons. I will accept the shortening of my name - Rose - only if I can tell by the way you said it that you know the full name is Rosemary (I can tell okay). I only accept Rosie if my inner child is out because that’s HER name though I accept Rosy , from one friend who asked permission a long time ago (hey @ladynorbert). I let any and all kids call me me Aunt Rose, not just my nieces and nephew (who is too young yet to call me anything), and my oldest niece still loves to call me by her baby name for me - AuRoo. This was probably a longer thesis on names than the question is meant to be, but that’s me!

2) Gender: Cis genderqueer woman is the best descriptor for my gender and sex.

3) Star sign: Leo - rawr.

4) Height: 5′3′‘ - just short enough to have short people problems but not quite short enough to be seen as short.

5) Hogwarts House: I’ve had long conversations about this with one of my closest friends @c-l-ford, and we really can’t come up with a true consensus. I think I’m a combo of all four, but I realize that’s a cop-out.

6) Favourite animal: Felines of any sort, though I’m an all around animal lover (bugs don’t count).

7) Hours of sleep: 8-12, though closer to 8 these days since the Lyrica is helping me to sleep more normally.

8) Dogs or Cats: Cats obvi, but I do love dogs.

9) Number of blankets: Like, I know this is asking the number of blankets you sleep with on your bed, but the phrasing makes me wanna go around and count all the blankets I own. But okay - I sleep with a light blanket during warmer months, and throw a big comforter over the top during the colder ones.

10) Dream trip: I’d love to take a cruise through the Mediterranean, taking stops in Sicily, Italy, Greece, Egypt, Turkey, Israel, Morocco, etc.

11) Dream job: At this point, I’d really just love to be working again in any capacity. I miss it so much. I miss feeling like I had a purpose, and knowing I was doing a good job, and working harder the next day, and thinking about getting promoted, and just generally - yea - being my workaholic self. Which makes being too disabled to work for over 15 years now kind of a bummer.

12) Time: 1:12 pm

13) Birthday: July 29

14) Favourite Bands: I’m never up on new music, so I’m gonna go with some of my classic faves here - Areosmith, Cheap Trick, The Doors, The Indigo Girls, Journey, The Monkees, R.E.M., Queen

15) Favourite Solo Artists: Ani DiFranco, Blondie, Dar Williams, Janis Joplin, Joan Jett, k.d. lang, P!nk, Tori Amos (and yes I added an s to make this one plural too, no fair asking for multiple bands but only one solo artist)

16) Song Stuck In My Head: Lady, by Styx

17) Last Movie I watched: Hidden Figures, though my stupid body fell asleep at the last third or so of the movie, so I’m gonna have to re-watch. (When I woke up, I turned to my friend and said “I missed the ending, did they ever make it to the moon?”)

18) Last Show I Watched: Madam Secretary (I’m a few eps behind though)

19) When Did I Create My Blog: I wanna say about four years ago??

20) What Do I Post/Reblog: So many. I’m a huge TV nerd, so lots of reblogs of gifsets and meta (and sometimes my own meta or short opinion bit) about lots of shows both past and present. I also dig me a lot of books and some movies, so those show up. Intersectional feminism is a big deal to me, so I signal boost a lot of stuff along those lines. I love memes, puns, cute animal pics, gender queering, and pretty shiny things. I might occasionally post personal stuff. I’m chronically ill and that affects my life to a large degree, so I’m likely to reblog stuff about that if it shows up on my dash. Around May - June, I’m likely to be posting about WisCon, my local feminist SFF con that happens Memorial Weekend each year. And in a couple of days here it’ll be November 1st which is when I let my Christmas nerd out to play, so there’ll be a lot of that then too.

21) Last Thing I Googled: haha, it was actually the song Lady by Styx because I couldn’t remember who sang it, and because once I realized it was in my head, I wanted to listen to it.

22) Other Blogs: No other tumblrs, though I do (very) occasionally post on my Dreamwidth account - same name as this tumblr.

23) Do I Get Asks: Not very often, though I love it when I do! I adore interacting with folks, so come at me.

24) Why I Chose My URL: sophy from sophia, the feminine divine aspect of god, and also just wisdom/knowledge in general (I was studying philosophy and religious studies when I came up with the sophygurl handle the first time). Then I added -gurl at the end because it was less likely to conflict with other ppl who wanted to combine sophy and girl together to make a name. lol

25) Following: 267 (this is why I can never catch up even on a good day)

26) Followers: 582 - can that be right? Do I have those reversed? I guess a lot of those are spam accounts.

27) Lucky Number: 5

28) Favourite instrument: Drums of all kinds.

29) What Am I Wearing: lol a silky nightgown paired with an old comfy sweatshirt over the top and comfy pj pants underneath, and warm socks.

30) Favourite Food: Dark chocolate, broccoli, potatoes, and my family’s recipe spaghetti sauce - which I’m gonna make in a few days for the first time in ages woo!

31) Nationality: USian.

32) Favourite Song: Imagine, by John Lennon.

33) Last Book Read: The Root by Na’amen Gobert Tilahun

34) Top Three Fictional Universes I’d Like To Join: Oh geeze, most of my fave universes to read about/watch are not ones I’d want to personally be involved in, so let me think. Maybe the world in Practical Magic, Starhawk’s The Fifth Sacred Thing but only if I could be part of the Bay Area world and not the LA one, Realm of the Elderlings - preferably in the Rain Wilds over other areas.

Tagging: other than the one who tagged me - if you got tagged in the body of this post for other reasons, consider yourselves tagged to do this! Otherwise - tagging anyone who wants to. Make sure you tag me so I’ll see it when you do it tho! :)

#tagging memes #question memes #tumblr meta #life with chronic illness #the song lady goes through my head a lot #because the name i think of the cats calling me #instead of like mommy or whatever #is lady #so i'll sometimes get singing something like #laaaaaaady #don't you know that we're huunnnngrrrrrryyyy #because i am giant nerd

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the-gay-in-the-way · 6 years

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It’s my birthday.

Woot, I guess.

I’m gonna be spending it watching terrible horror movies, playing food fantasy(which I am now addicted to(darn you Dan and Phil...)), and eating brownies instead of cake.

But also I just woke up(at noon, which is terrible)and I had a thought I felt like talking about.

I mentioned this before, back when I first started posting stuff a few months ago, but there is this idea for an au I had.

It’s actually what I ended up basing some things in the CAP universe on.

Like Virgil comforting Thomas after nightmares.

That came from the au.

And this au is called the Knightmare au.

Reason being that this is what Thomas calls the strange shadow creature that’s been protecting and comforting him ever since he was a baby.

In this universe, Virgil is actually manifested first as Thomas’ survival instinct.

And he doesn’t just naturally look like Thomas, which makes sense here since Thomas was a baby and you can’t really do much as a baby.

Instead of that, Virgil is just a huge and terrifying shadow monster.

His body formed that way to best protect his host.

But he also has to comfort his host.

So his form is also stitched together and able to shrink down into a cute, and slightly ominous looking, plushy.

There’s, of course, more to this au than just that.

But, I just wanted to mention the idea for a second.

Oh, and, if anyone’s curious, here’s what I imagine he’d look like.

And his plush form is what I have in my icon.

Also, I have a separate version of the design that is digitally colored and stuff where it has a second sort of mirorred design that looks a lot nicer and more pleasant.

Like, this is what he looks like when he’s trying to be scary.

But he can look a lot cuter and more like a plush toy when he wants to.

I know he’s not exactly super scary in the first place(and that I’m not very good at art so this isn’t great in general)but I quite like the idea of this being his “Knightmare” form in this au.

Like, he’s just naturally a huge shadow blob covered in spiky crystals and with a skull for a head.

Also, he has stitches on his skull.

Regardless of what form he’s in, the stitches are still there.

He also still has his eye shadow but it’s basically just discoloration in the bone.

And his skull is actually a soft and squishy plush material sometimes but can be more stiff and bone like when he wants it to be.

Yeah.

This is just a cool au I’ve thought of.

The first thing I actually came up with and put some thought into for this fandom, back when I first got into it.

Haven’t got around to doing anything with it yet, past making the drawings.

But I’d like to at some point.

Anyways, I’ve gotta go.

There’s food calling my name and there’s stuff I want to do while I still have the chance to do them and enjoy myself on my birthday.

I’ll be back to regular posts and responses tomorrow.

Later. o7

#sanders sides #virgil sanders #thomas sanders #sanders sides headcanons #just a word about my old knightmare au #felt like talking about it before i started my day

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ohtobealady · 8 years

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Thank you, @ladymarycrawley for the tag! :D  A - age: I turned 29 in December. Or rather, it was the third anniversary of my 27th birthday.  B - biggest fear: something happening to my children  C - current time: 7:31pm central time  D - drink you last had: water  E - easiest person to talk to: I'd say both @thehiddenbaroness and my husband - in different ways. I strongly encourage strong platonic relationships when you're in a committed romantic relationship. Social needs, gals.  F - favourite song: I can only say at the moment songs - I've been into Mumford & Sons  G - grossest memory: strange as it seems, it would have to be when my water was broken with my eldest child - I didn't know that it would keep gushing and then leaking throughout labor. Oh, and the initial breaking was just *shudder* y'all. I had no clue. That's wild stuff.  H - horror yes or horror no: No, thanks. Lol. My imagination is too much for me.  I - in love: yeahhhhhh. I am.  J - jealous of people: I am guilty of being a jealous person. But maybe more harmless? Like I'm glad they get to do whatever they're doing but I wish I could too. Lol.  K - killed someone: with kindness  L - love at first sight or should I walk by again: walk by a couple of times ;)  M - middle name: my maiden name  N - number of siblings: 4  O - one wish: that my taxes were already done BUT THEY CANT BE BECAUSE IM WAITING ON A FORM STILL. Stupid adult things.  P - person you last called: my friend I haven't spoken to in a while, actually. She's good. She was a flood victim and she just got her new cabinets in her house! Woot woot! No paint or floors yet, but she thinks she may be in by the end of the month!  Q - question you’re always asked: Is that how your name is spelled? / How do you say your name?  R - reason to smile: new house, new baby around the corner, my two year old is peeing in the potty - which is actually super exciting to me. So happy.  S - song you last sang: "Tale as Old as Time"  T - time you woke up: 5:45a  U - underwear colour: red and hot pink  V - vacation destination: I'd like to go to the mountains soon  W - worst habit: drinking Cokes. I have like half a bottle/one can a day, but I need to eat healthier :/ like, I need to cut out that unnecessary sugar  X - x-rays had: whoa, ok. Um. Obviously dentist ones every year, X-Rays of my lungs more than once (2-3 times), X-Ray of my appendix and kidneys (I think) when I was 17.  Y - your favourite food: breads. Current bread of choice - yeast rolls and King Cakes  Z - zodiac sign: Sagittarius This was fun! I tag @thehiddenbaroness and @randomabiling if they want to do this too :)

#about me #things I do to procrastinate way more important things

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amusechris · 4 years

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CTMH Party Time

Masculine teen cards can be tricky! I was wanting to play with my Close To My Heart Party Time stamp and die set one more time before they retire officially next week. At first I found this stamp tricky to work with but once I started playing, I’ve ended up using it for several male birthdays this month! woot woot. The main image, the sentiment Party Time and the tiny stars all come from the

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brocolirose · 6 years

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❄️🎄 Xmas M-1, woot woot!!! 🎁☃️ . . . How do you feel both underwhelmed and low-key overwhelmed? It's like I have this sinister humming in the back of my head, always listing what I should do to get better, get better, get better... Even as I completely check out, feeling lazy and wanting a break from worries. Pressuring oneself to "function" is the dumbest strategy, but fighting (or trying to let go of) the pressure launches a bizarre inner concerto of voices saying things like "chill", "do stuff", "don't take things too seriously", "don't let yourself slide back", "you have to keep at it", "it's okay to take a break", "but not too much", "breathe", "why aren't you making progress?", "you're doing better than a year ago", "when's it going to end?", "BREATHE", "what do I want?", "CHILL", "omg maintenance of the body is sucking all my limited energy", "I can't think", "I'm stupid", "it's the depression talking", "I'm not doing enough", "DO SOMETHING, DO MORE, DO MORE!!!", "stop putting pressure on yourself"... . BLAH BLAH BLAH it's all resistance: 🎈I need just enough to keep the drive-to-live balloon inflated, but not so much that it'll explode💥 but then what happens when there's a tornado inside that relative equilibrium? (science: is it even possible? And what's the airflow like inside a deflating balloon?) . . It's my birthday in a month! I always have this weird mixture of excitement and dread in the upcoming time. I love the Xmas atmosphere and the fairy lights everywhere, but the actual day almost always turns out anticlimactic for me. When I have my own home, I'll have the stereotypical Xmas atmosphere, and on the day itself I hope to be surrounded with loved ones, lounging around with hot chocolates and hot wine and sweet treats, and laughing and cuddling and dancing to merry tunes and stuffing our mouths with my birthday cakesssss. ☺️😋 🎂🎄☃️🎁🎂 (at Le Forum des Halles) https://www.instagram.com/p/Bqj9DQUguRj/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=13103cnrw1oim

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alex-guerin · 6 years

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So, today was my birthday. Woot....woot....

I had planned on going on a little day trip today. Was gonna go out to Iowa and visit the actual Field of Dreams since I’ve always wanted to go out there and it’s only like 3 hrs from my place, so it kinda ticks me off that I’ve never been. But before I was planning to go, I wanted my dad to fix the A/C in my truck, didn’t wanna do a six hour+ round trip without it. He never fixed it. And I woke up to it being rainy and gross all day, so wasn’t even like I could just drive with my windows down and enjoy the sunshine because, what sunshine?

I did end up meeting up with a couple coworkers once they got off work for lunch. Which was nice, I guess. But they weren’t who I was wanting to spend time with today. I wanted to spend time with Jason, and had almost hoped that it’d actually happen since I found out his kids had gone back to their mom’s place, his mom was babysitting his nieces for the weekend cuz his bro and sis-in-law were off on their own little roadtrip hitting up like, every damn brewery in Milwaukee or something. So I figured whatever he’d had planned wasn’t gonna happen after all. He only ever has plans with his bro’s family or his kids anyway, so, made sense to figure that, right? So I texted him to ask if he had plans this weekend. When he answered that he did, my heart sank. I tried, I really tried not to be upset, but...everything I’d tried to come up with to make this birthday actually a happy one blew up in my face.

I didn’t text him again for awhile until I finally sent one saying how since no one was coming over after all, I could apparently stop trying to make sure my apartment was presentable and just go back to watching movies. He said that sounded like a good plan. I answered that it was a plan, maybe not a great one, but it was something. Then asked him if I should just bring over the 12 pack of Budweiser I’ve had in the fridge for him for like a month. He told me to hold onto it because he’d “probably be over someday”.....yeah, not exactly what I wanted to hear and that just sank me even lower. I asked him if beer had a best by date, would it even still be any good by then. I could tell he was trying to get me laughing, he was being silly with his answers after that. I finally told him I was sorry, but I had to put my phone somewhere out of reach because I was starting to think and say things that I shouldn’t and that I didn’t want to screw things up and for him to be reminded just how fucked up, insecure, neurotic and emotional I actually am. After I sent that, I figured he wasn’t gonna text back, he usually doesn’t when I send messages like that, so I put my phone in my room and came back out to the living room to curl up on the couch and watch Doctor Who. When I finally went back into my room, I saw I had a message but figured it was from my mom telling me she’s sorry that yet again, things didn’t work out and I wasn’t able to hang out with J. Nope, it was actually from him telling me I need to turn my brain off and gave me pointers on how to do that, followed by a text saying that probably didn’t work but I owed him $100 for the advice anyway “lmao” -- so yeah, again he was trying to, if nothing else, get me to smile. I didn’t answer. I just picked up my laptop and my phone and went back out to the living room. Nearly an hour after he’d sent those texts, around the time I’m assuming he was getting ready to hit the sheets, he sent me another text saying he hoped he hadn’t upset me.

...I haven’t answered. I don’t know how to answer. It wasn’t necessarily him that upset me, but it kinda was the tipping point, I guess. But at the same time, I keep wanting to ask why it is he’ll make plans with everyone else but when it comes to me, he doesn’t wanna commit because he never knows what’s going to happen. I really don’t know how to ask that without making it sound like I’m whining or attacking him or trying to guilt him or something. I just, I really do want to know. And how could I answer his last text? Because it did upset me! Above anything else, all I really wanted for my birthday today was to spend time with him, and he knew that. He’s known it for the longest time. And being utterly alone on my birthday wasn’t fun at all.

I took my meds, I swear I did, but still I don’t wanna eat anything, don’t wanna drink anything, not even really watching DW anymore, it’s just playing in the background. I literally don’t want to do anything. I don’t even want to go to bed. I just...I want a hug.

#personal log #just whining again...#sorry I'm being a pest

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heyejay · 7 years

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2017

Imagine!! This year went by so fast and in a few days, it is finally ending. I have been very busy that I wasn't able to blog. Now, I'll just be having the monthly highlights to summarize what I've been through for the past months ☺️

January - May >> Review review review for the boards!! By the end of May, I'm a Certified Public Accountant already!!! Thank God!!!

June >> Registered to have my PRC ID!! Took my oath at Legazpi, Albay.

July >> Job Hunting!

August >> Hired as a Finance and Accounting Analyst at a BPO company here in Naga City.

September >> My boyfriend and I celebrated our first year anniversary!!!

November >> Woot woot for another year for me! Celebrated my 23rd birthday. God is good!

That'll be all for now!

All the love,

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erindatesla · 7 years

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FF: Valentine's Day Gone Wrong

February 13, 2015

VIA

This week instead of sharing my own traumatizing flashback, I asked friends to share rotten Valentine's Day stories (the kind where in the moment you're like "one day I'll look back at this and laugh," and now you're laughing). I LOVED getting their responses, reading along, LOL-ing and of course, empathizing.

THANK YOU to the gals (and guy!) who contributed.

Happy a great Valentine's Day weekend, whether than means eating chocolate and watching Rom Coms alone or going on the most magical date of your life, or something in between.

Cock Blocked by Bath Salts

The setting is the third year of a three year relationship. The first two Valentine's Day we were together my significant other had to work, so I spent them alone. But the third he didn't have to work! I made it VERY clear that I expected big things. I had class until late, so he said he would pick me up after class to bring me home. I get a text as my class is ending saying that he needs 30 more minutes, so I wait at school. He shows up 30 minutes later looking winded and very nervous. It turns out, he had completely transformed the one bedroom apartment where we lived together in to a Target Valentine's Day commercial (I later found out he spent like $500 at Target buying every possible chotchkie he could find). After a lovely dinner of chicken breast, West African rice and sushi (?), he led me to the bathroom where he had drawn me a bath and lit candles. I got in the bath and he sat awkwardly on the closed toilet seat watching me, so I invited him in to the bath (for what it's worth, that's 12 feet and three inches of person in a regular sized bath tub). He proceeded to add bath salts and rub my back as best he could in the cramped bath rub. That's when I started to feel the burn. All of the sudden a slow burn started near my butt and spread to my lady parts. So, I excused myself (out of discomfort) and headed to the bedroom to change in to some pretty lingerie. As I am positioning myself in the most seductive way I possible could with a burning vagina, he runs into the bedroom grasping his undercarriage in pain and yells "IT BURNS!!" Needless to say, we think we both had an allergic reaction to the bath salts and spent the rest of Valentine's Day rubbing cortisone cream on each other's nether regions.

Bloody Surprise

My birthday is Valentine's Day and it was my first VDay with my boyfriend, in fact, my first VDay ever having a boyfriend. We went out to dinner and then back to his place. We were starting sexy-time and he went down on me, but a shortly into it he got up with blood on his face, and I knew I wasn't on my period. He had a bloody nose at the exact wrong moment! I was pretty mortified, but three years later it's funny.

Love in the Time of Woot

I was dating my now-husband for a few months and I wanted to take the relationship to the next level by getting him a gift that said, "I kinda really really really like you and I want you to tell me you love me first so I can say it back to you and not be the first one to say it." So I set out to get him a super special VDAY gift and settled on a Louis Vuitton wallet. When he got my gift, he liked it but he said it "didn't work for him" and it "wasn't big enough." In Louis words that means, "I want something more expensive." Being the sucker that I am, I got him the more expensive wallet thinking that I would probably get a super nice gift in return, as in Louis' best friend, Tiffany. You know what I got? Luggage. I got a god damn piece of blue Samsonite luggage that he probably got from Woot's Deal of the Day. I. Was. Mortified! I don't even know how he managed to get himself out of the dog house for that, but I guess he did and here we are with a litter of dogs and kids now. And to this day, I still give him crap about the best Valentine's Day present I ever got.

Love(less) & Basketball

In high school I was dumped on Valentine's Day at an away basketball game by my girlfriend at the time, who was on the girl's basketball team. She did it right after she won her game, and right before we lost ours.

The Most Innocent Breakup

The setting is 7th grade. In a scandalous scandal, I end up dating an 8th grader and having a momentary increase in popularity because EVERYONE is talking about it. We hold hands and kiss under the blankets on the couch at his house and, let me tell you, it was SERIOUS. So serious that his dad gave us the talk about being safe and making good choices. This prompted him to somehow thing that meant we were going to have sex. So after a very awkward advance, I decided it was time to break it off. Unfortunately, this all happened around Valentine's Day, so 7th grade me thought it was a really good idea to write him a break up note (no doubt written in multi color jelly pens and folded in to some shape), attach it to a heart shaped box of chocolates and leave the box on his doorstep. So classy.

Rats!

There was one time [friend] and I were sharing a bottle of Andres while making heart shaped pancakes on Valentine's Day and A FUCKING RAT GOT CAUGHT IN OUR MOUSETRAP. Funny in retrospect, terrifying at the time. We had to ask the hot boy living downstairs to come put it in the trash.

The Lingerie Incident

One Valentine’s Day long ago I decided it would be fun/cute/sexy to surprise the guy I had been dating by wearing lingerie. Let’s call him Woody Harrelson, as he was once described, for the sake of this story. I had the whole thing planned out: I would lure Woody Harrelson to my apartment by telling him I needed help with a homework assignment and then surprise him by strutting into the living room wearing the sexiest black lingerie I could find from H&M. (Why I didn’t at least spring for Victoria’s Secret I have no idea.)

So far everything was going to plan. Woody Harrelson agreed to come over, so I drove to his house to pick him up (the fact that he wouldn’t even drive over himself should have been a red flag) wearing the lingerie under my sweats. Once we arrived at my apartment I coyly told him to wait in the living room while I went to get my laptop. I then skipped into the bathroom ripped off my sweats, put on my 5-inch Steve Madden stilettos and, as I had envisioned, strutted into the living room on the unsuspecting Woody.

Those first few minutes are still a blur. As I stood there, trying my best to look hot and feeling pretty confident, I noticed something wasn’t quite right. Instead of instantly running and tearing off my $27.99 H&M corset, Woody just stared. The look on his face first changed from confusion to horror, and then he suddenly broke into uncontrollable giggles,put a pillow over his face and whaled, “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!”

I gulped and half-heartedly whimpered, “HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY!”

I’m not sure how or why, but I made my way over to the couch and sat down next to Woody Harrelson who continued to giggle and cover me up with the couch pillows. Then we watched "Glee."

Needless to say the fun/cute/sexy sex that you only see in the movies did not happen that night and I furiously drove Woody Harrelson home once the episode of Glee ended. I would later find out the reason for his actions: he was seeing another girl. Thanks for the head’s up, Woody!

I will never wear lingerie again. HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!

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crazykendal · 7 years

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The Most Personal Ive Ever Been

Please dont read this

Who was the last person you took a picture with? 

I made a video with my sister a few nights ago

Do you have a younger sister? 

two

Did anything “cute” happen today?

Haha no, like always

Has a boy/girl ever called you babe/baby? 

I accidentally called my friend Morgan babe once haha I got to see her today for the first time in months

What woke you up this morning?

My alarm clock

Does anyone know your personal tumblr password?  

Surely a lot of people know because it’s really simple

Who last made you smile? 

This guy

Do you have a bad temper?  

Seriously I have anger issues, of course

Who’s the last person you argued with? 

Honestly.. Myself. I kept telling myself how dumb and stupid I was, something new

Do you know anyone who is pregnant right now? 

yeah

Do you speak your mind all the time or hold things in? 

I used to speak my mind a lot to people I cared about. I won’t anymore because it’s kind of regrettable sometimes.

Do you believe that you can change for someone? 

Yeah of course, it’ll kill you not being yourself with a mask like that but whatever, maybe they’ll like your fake self more..? Who the fuck knows

Who was the last male you talked to, other than family?

My frienndd.. Yeah

When was the last time you flew in a plane?

Never

Are you currently wanting any piercings or tattoos?

Chloe Price is inspiring but I do not want a full sleeve tat.. So no

Do you find tattoos attractive in the opposite/same sex?

Depends, a lot is too much

What do you want right this second?

To find out who’s gonna be in my classes, seriously that’s all I need

What’s the last thing you touched, other than your computer?

My rubberbands on my arm

How do you feel about girls smoking?

Haha here have some lung cancer

Do you prefer the ocean or pool?

pool.

Are you outgoing or more shy?

Depends on who im with. I’m really crazy and annoying with some friends and i’m more serious with others, or just awkward and dorky with others.

Are you wearing jeans right now? 

Would you be able to date someone who doesn’t make you laugh?

Depends on who

When was the last time someone held your hand?

The other day, but it was my sister lol

Whose jacket did you wear last?

my own.

Is there something you’re looking forward to?

Can you commit to one person?

Of course

Are you a mean person?

Yeah, I should probably be taking medication for it

Has a guy/girl sat on your bed before?

both

Did you talk to someone until you fell asleep last night? 

Nope we’re always chasin that paradiseeeee

Is there someone who continuously lets you down?

My expectations? All the time!

Have you ever felt like you weren’t good enough?

I never am and it’s always getting me down but whatever I’ll just sit here on the floor

Is your room ever clean?

sometimes

How often do you listen to music?

It’s something i’ve grown to need. I have to listen to it or i’ll go insane or kill someone. (im listening to music now) ~keep daydreaming~

Are you one to start the conversation?

Yeah, I’ve realized that, so if anyone has been wondering why they haven’t talked to me in awhile it’s because I’ve figured that i’m probably annoying or something.

What’s your relationship with the person you last texted? 

We were kinda.. Friends last year not really (I kinda used her.. Sorry not sorry)

Have you ever had someone pick you up off the ground and carry you?

No, but I can do that with people

Are you a couple with the last person you kissed on the lips?

Haha nope

Are you wearing jeans, shorts, sweatpants, or pajama pants?

shorts

Are you wearing a ring, if so who gave it to you?

Don’t own one

How many people have you had strong romantic feelings for?

Haha one, but fuck that

Have you ever walked on the beach at night?

Yeah, I did once when it was a full moon, it was pretty neat

Do you have someone of the opposite sex you can tell everything to?

Have you ever fallen asleep in someone’s arms?

What was the last thing you licked?

my lips

Last time you laughed?

About 30 minutes ago

Were you intoxicated the last time you threw up?

Sure wasn’t

What are you doing tomorrow?

I have to go to school and were having a stupid dance afterwards

Who was the last person to make you mad?

White supremacists

What’s the last movie you saw in theaters and with who?

Spiderman Homecoming with my dad and sister

Have you ever been hurt by someone you never thought would hurt you?

Technically yes, but it wasn’t their fault?

Do you tend to fall for the same type of person over and over?

Kind of haha, now that ive looked back, theres things a lot of those people have in common

Do you care too much about your appearance?

yeah

What are you listening to at the moment?

La devoteeeeeeeeee

Are you the type of person who has a new boyfriend/ girlfriend every week?

Haha i’m no hoe

Is there anyone you want to come see you?

Yeah, but at the same time I wish I never saw them again

Ever given your all to someone who walked away?

kinda…

Who was the first person you talked to today?

My mom

Will this week be a good one?

I’m gonna end it good

Anything happen to you within the past month that made you really happy?

No I bought Gta V again and I got Life Is Strange Episode One

Did you talk to someone until you fell asleep last night?

Next time you will kiss someone on the cheek or forehead?

I’m going to die before that thought crosses my mind

Who should start the kiss, the girl or the boy?

Doesn’t matter

Be honest, are you starting to gain feelings towards anyone?

Omg this guy in my math class who sits behind me, but i kinda maybe liked him last year haha

Are you one of those people who never drinks soda?

Sometimes.. Not usually a lot.

You’re single, right?

Some people think i’m not but i’m not saying anything

Excited for anything?

yesss

What do you have pierced?

The person/people of the opposite sex you truly care about needs you at 3am, would you go?

maybeee

How’s your heart lately?

Broken and whole

Do you plan on sleeping in tomorrow?

No ive got schoool

How old will you be in 14 months?

15 woot woot

What is the next thing you will probably buy?

Life Is Strange: Episodes 2, 3, and 4 or preorder the new Life Is Strange: Before The Storm Deluxe Edition.

Do you think girls deserve more respect?

Yeah, were treated like trash

Explain your relationship status?

I seem taken but dood idk

What’s on your bedroom floor right now?

My carpet :)

Is there a girl that you would do absolutely anything for?

apart from family, nearly anything.

Aw cmon, maybe like 2 months ago maybe. Not anymore.

Who was the last person you saw, besides family?

My neighbors

Has anyone of the opposite sex hurt you emotionally?

maybe

Would you rather be stuck in the pouring rain, or in a snowstorm?

rainrainrain

How many hours of sleep did you get last night?

Can you swim well?

sure

What makes you mad about girls?

All the cute ones are straight

What makes you mad about guys?

Why are they all f boys, seriously

Have you ever been given roses?

Biggest pet peeve?

People who keep telling me what to do

Are you texting anyone at this moment?

I just was

Are promises important to you?

Yes, I never tell people to promise me but I always trust people. I can’t anymore because one of my friends told someone something about me so I have major trust issues now! Yayyyy

What were you doing at midnight last night?

sleeping

What do you think of Valentine’s day?

Stupid af

Do you feel comfortable with answering personal questions?

Nah I don’t care

What’s more important in a relationship trust or happiness?

TRUST. no trust I can’t love yah

What’s a nickname you go by?

None because NO unless certain reasons

How do you calm down when you’re extremely angry?

Panic! At The Disco’s emperors new cloths on repeat, which i’m doing right now and i’m not mad but it helps a lot

Do you like the beach?

I used to a lot

Do you ever apologize first?

Yeah because that’s after I realize I just yell at people.

Connection between you and the last person who text messaged you?

He’s my dad so strong connection?

Why aren’t you happy?

Depression actually runs in my family and i’m not mentally well so that’s cool How do you feel about chocolate covered strawberries?

nah

Was it a boy or a girl to text you first today?

My dad

Do you still talk to the person you last kissed on the lips?

Well technically no because I never had or ever will

Is there anyone you know that deserves to get slapped?

Me, and a ton of people

What are you most looking forward to tomorrow?

Seeing friends

Where is the boy you want most?

Oh boi I don’t know at this point

Have you ever seen your best friend cry?

I lost my bestfriend, but my old one? All the time when she was little haha

Are you wearing makeup right now?

Just washed my face so no

Is your hair up or down right now?

Down forever and then the rest of the Now Or Never lyrics

How many months until your birthday?

4 months til im 15, I can just hear that stupid 15 taylor swift song

Do you like falling asleep to the sound of the rain?

yes

Who was the last person who gave you advice?

My mom

Have you ever felt like you weren’t good enough?

I never am dude

Do you have feelings for someone?

Kinda? Not really because i’ve basically killed my heart at this point

What are you planning on doing after this survey?

sleep

What’s something you really want right now, be honest?

If I were always myself and being honest I would say but i can’t

Is there a guy that knows everything about you?

No, not one. No ones knows everything about me, not even me at this point.

Do you look at the keyboard when you type?

I am right now so haha

What was the reason behind the last time you cried?

Can’t remember

Are you secretly in love with someone?

I used to be? What? How? Never again? Yeah haha fuck me

Will you be in a relationship in the next month?

Dunno but I can’t say no

Last person you rode in a car with under the age of 21?

My sisters

Would you ever dye you hair black?

Do you have a best friend?

Used to

Has anyone said they love you in the last week?

My dad?

Who was the last person to wave at you?

A girl who I kinda know

Is there anything bothering you right now?

yeah

What color shirt are you wearing?

white.

Who was the last person you hugged?

My cat

Is there anyone in particular that you’re missing right now?

Not anymore but maybe

Could you stay in the same relationship for over a year?

yes

Do you miss the way things used to be?

Yes but things have changed maybe for the better

Is any part of you sad at all?

My whole life, yes

Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?

Doubt it, most people forget about me so what fucking ever

Do you like anyone at the moment?

Nah not really

Do you think the last person you kissed is nice?

Funny you say that If never kissed a soul on this planet and based on my guesses on how long im gonna life I say I never will

Who was the last person to call you?

friends

What is the last non-alcoholic beverage you had?

Water

Are you scared of spiders?

What are your plans for this weekend?

I’m gonna get a laptop and maybe get Life Is Strange if I can convince my dad to buy it

Ever been swimming in a lake or river?

both

What did you last buy?

stuff

What’s irritating you right now?

I’m waiting for something

Are you listening to music right now?

Halsey’s Hurricane at its finest

Do you like Chinese food?

sure

What is the last movie you saw in theaters?

Spiderman homecoming, tom holland is adorable

Was this the best year of your life?

No, but it was my luckiest

First and last name of your very best friend?

none

What was going through your mind during your last kiss?

WHY THE FUCK DO ALL THE SURVEYS I PICK INCLUDE KISSING STOOOOOP

Have you ever had a dream about people you love dying?

No but definitely daydreams. I started daydreaming like crazy last year and it’s destroying me. I think its called maladaptive daydreams? Not sure but it’s crazzzzzzzzzzzzy

Have you ever liked someone so much that it hurts?

haha yeah, it almost feels physical

Do you believe that you are a good boyfriend or girlfriend?

Nah cuz I dont have either

What did you do yesterday?

First day of school

What time did you go to bed at and when did you wake?

I went to bed at 10 and woke up at 6

If the last person you dated said they were in love with you, what would you say?

Who are you

What places have you been to today?

school

Anyone of the opposite sex been on your mind lately?

Not really

Do you like long hugs?

yes

What mood are you in right now?

idk

Has anyone put their arms around you in the past 5 days?

yeah

When was the last time you sang an entire song?

2 days ago

Last person you texted?

My dad, don’t worry I have no friends :)

Latest you stayed up in the past week?

Maybe like 11

Have you been taken to the emergency room in an ambulance?

No never had to go to the er before

Is tomorrow going to be a good day?

I hope so

What did you have for dinner last night?

I didn’t have anything

Are you wearing matching socks?

yes

Do you know how to read music?

Do you get nervous when someone is angry and yelling around you?

I get mad and then I get mad at myself which isn’t good

Who did you make plans with today?

Myself and my schedule

What smell reminds you most of summer?

Heat? Could that be a smell? Or chlorine

When in a car and you’re at a stop light or something, do you look at people?

Do you plan on moving soon?

Have you ever said something and then regretted saying it after?

Ah my whole life summed up

How many piercings do you have?

none

Would you be able to date someone who doesn’t make you laugh?

depends

When you think of the rainbow, what pops in your head?

Funny you ask, probably lgbtqia+ pride stuff

How long does it take you to shower?

I never know

Explain why you last threw up?

Stomach flu

What’s the opposite sex form of your name?

kendal

Have you ever lost contact with someone you wish you didn’t?

Ehh no and yes

Did you talk to a complete jerk today?

probably

Is the last person you kissed more than a year older than you?

nope

What do you think of Lady Gaga?

I love her

What’s the most important part of a relationship in your opinion?

Love, respect, and TRUST

What time are you waking up tomorrow?

four

Are you currently reading a book?

No but I will on October 3rd

When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper?

I’m listening to 100 letters awww yeahhhh, Idk

Do you have any piercings?

Were you single on your last birthday?

yes

Have you ever spent the night at a boy’s house?

probably

When was the last time you felt honestly broken?

Sometime in may like maybe the 16th

Are you craving something?

Are you thinking of someone right now?

I always am

Do you plan on sleeping in tomorrow?

noooooooooooooooo

Do you think anyone has feelings for you?

I know someone who does

When was the last time you stayed up late because you were talking to someone?

Sometime in January

Have you had a good day today?

sure

Is there any chance you will kiss the last person you kissed again?

nope

Do you still talk to the last person you made out with?

Woah what..?? Haha

Are you wearing socks right now?

yes

Is your birthday on a holiday?

Can you make a dollar in change right now?

Have you ever been out past curfew?

I don’t have one yet

Have you ever thought about getting your lip pierced?

Ew no

Have you kissed anyone in the past month?

Never have

When was the last time that you consumed alcohol?

never

Who was the last person to cook dinner?

my mom

How many people have told you they were in love with you?

No one

How often do you wear necklaces?

Everyday

Could you go the rest of your life without smoking a cigarette?

Yep, I plan on it

Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?

Of course

Do you tend to make things complicated?

always

Would you be happier if life had a rewind button?

READY FOR THE MOSH PIT, SHAKA BRAH

MAX CAULFIELD I LOVEEEE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

Have you ever stayed up with someone of the opposite sex for a whole night just talking?

Texting? yeah

Where was your profile picture taken?

At a shopping outlet in Oregon with my sister

Are you counting down for anything?

STAR WARS EPISODE 8!

How often do you drink energy drinks?

never

Do you ignore people when you’re mad/upset with them?

Not really

Have you ever dyed your hair?

Are you an emotional person?

I didn’t used to be

Are you nice to everyone?

Of course not

Have you had any relationships this year?

Have you ever laughed so hard you cried?

yes

Are you a morning person or a night person?

Both

What feature do you usually get most complimented on?

Eyes or my hair haha

What do you usually order on a pizza?

pepperoni

When did your power last go out?

years ago

What would you order if you went to McDonald’s right now?

nothing

Are you obsessed with anything?

CHLOE ELIZABETH PRICE

Do you have long nails?

What flavor of toothpaste do you use?

mint

How many posters do you have in your bedroom?

A lotttttttt

Do you buy birthday cards or make them?

Make them

Is there a TV show that you watch every day?

Do you eat your pizza crust?

Yeah dude

What do you spend the majority of your money on?

Video games

What is the worst pain that you’ve experienced?

Heart break

Does your bedroom door lock?

What is one thing you will never understand?

People’s thoughts

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