#my brain ain't braining anymore and I wish to be done

[illithilit]

These aren't going on separate posts bc I'm lazy but. The romance headcanons I mentioned doing!

Orianna

Has technically """dated""" plenty of people, but you'll notice the quotes; is it really dating if you're smitten kitten and she's draining you dry of resources or the will to hang onto the souls of yourself and or those you love....? Probably not. The singular person she's dated that she felt anything for was someone who ironically had the aforementioned situation in reverse -- bc yanno, when you're the token backup son of a devout Lolthite noble house, you'll do anything and everything you can to get ahead. Even if that means charming the woman who you figure out to be a devil demigod into granting you magic and planning on taking her divine spark for yourself. Let it be known, though, that she consumed his soul immediately following killing him, so technically he doesn't exist anymore. She still loves the Drowic culture tho

Succubus adjacent without actually being at all a succubus. ( Partially bc I had originally planned on making a succubus, and then the muse evolved. )

Thoroughly enjoys sex, and is equally comfortable with relationships that are built on nothing more than it.

It's not as if she dislikes polyamory in theory, but in practice, I think if she actually fell in love with someone again, she's going to be a bit obsessive about them and would get too jealous for it to be a good idea to have anyone else in the relationship. Bc I note: she could easily turn into the horrifyingly toxic ex / girlfriend if properly motivated. ( Read: this could be your vibe, specifically: "I will kill your friends and family to remind you of my love." )

That said, unless things go in that godawful direction, she's the sort to want to know every little detail about her person, and will remember them all with keen accuracy. ( Might not come across in writing, bc I am extremely disabled in this area whoops. ) Gift giving and service is definitely one of her love languages, and she will positively spoil her partner. So is physical touch tho; one must be willing to cuddle her.

Demiromantic af, but sexually attracted to anyone with enough intelligence. The whole gender thing has never and will never be a factor here.

Tends to quickly lose interest in people if they only express interest in her sexually. Whether this ends in her blowing them off, using them for her own gain, or throwing them out on their face largely depends on the context of the relationship. To be clear, this by no means implies that they need to be interested in her romantically, it's just that if she feels like sex is all you see in her, she tends to want to burn your world to the ground. ( Rafiki vc: look harder.... Throw in an appreciation of her cruelty, or maybe her intellect. That sort of thing. )

Blurg

The thing you have to understand with him is, he's not fit into hobgoblin society well before he was grown; he was that weird kid that the others of his village were either very cruel to or otherwise wouldn't have a thing to do with. Yeah, he grew up with close relationships to his parents and siblings, but like.... My point in this is, between that, and the traumas of growing up in a community ( including himself from a fairly young age ) that frequently participated in surface raids, you get used to death and the notion that no one's safe or permanent. So even after he escaped and put together his own life, he hasn't exactly been one to let anyone get particularly close to him and you can see it in the way that the others speak well of him, but with no real personal knowledge, and how he will tell you a whole lot about his background, but if you pay attention, it's actually p divorced from having anything to do about him specifically. Which is to say, he absolutely never let anyone get close enough to date them even if he's had a passing interest in them. ( It's also why I struggle to picture him in a relationship with anyone but Ome tbh, but that's got another tangent involved. )

Prefers to be pretty well bonded to a partner before he's willing to sleep with them, both bc in his mind, it's a bonding experience, and bc he needs to be comfortable enough with someone to be okay with be vulnerable with them. ( Both in a 'sex leaves you open' type ways and also, he's middle-aged and not sure what he's doing in this area. )

May possibly be comfortable with a poly relationship, but likely only in the circumstance that it's not just one person dating others, it's everyone dating each other, and he was comfortable with the other person well before this was suggested.

100/10 spouse material; he's thoughtful, willing to communicate and compromise, and loves cooking for his partner.

Can be sexually and or romantically attracted to any gender, but is highkey demi.

Mourndax

Definitely had a teen love before he was married to Xune, but it was a bridge he burned in the most scorched earth fashion he could before the wedding out of grief. He and Xune weren't exactly on good terms, but she at least attempted to treat him as a friend -- though her acting in public as if they were married is what seared the resentment and disdain into Mourndax's mind. Never let it be said that he took the bad situation or his hatred of Xune quietly, bc he definitely tried to kill her and their child before he left. And he'd try again too if he saw either of them again. ( No, I've never bothered actually naming his child; he doesn't even know the kid's gender let alone their name, and I am equally apathetic. )

Since coming to the surface, he's had flings here and there, but he's never actually properly dated anyone since he was a teen.

Probably wouldn't be into polyamory??? But I'm not a hundred percent sure here either

Can be v sweet, thoughtful, and protective as a partner, but also tends to not acknowledge that he is. He's v tough and you will not see otherwise, understand?? He bites >:T

Wholly and completely gay in each and every way

Grazilaxx

You look at a mind flayer, and most people's assumption is look at the virgin. Except Graz is not. Graz has spent a lot of time among humanoids, and as such allowed them to mold curiosity into experience. Mind you, its exes do rather read like a grocery list of things is doesn't like in partners ( it likes the decisive, confident, communicative sorts tyvm, everyone else fuck off ) but that's distinctly bc it's figured out what it does and doesn't like through experience bc its younger self had a hard time conceptualizing such things and thus gave most that asked a chance.

A lot of its previous relationships ended bc it tends to be a p intense person that doesn't have much interest in carving out pieces of itself to make room for anyone else. It's not internalized this as something wrong with it so much as an acceptance that it's not everyone's cup of tea. If it's close enough to someone, however, this will translate into it getting cagey about pieces of itself being visible, bc it half expects the pattern to keep repeating. Doesn't mean, though, that it actively masks who it is; it just may not be super open about itself or else side step particularly personal things.

Surprisingly sappy and sentimental when in love, and likes to spend time by existing in the same room together. May not understand your hobbies, but will support them all the same. You might even find little gifts relating to them among your things you don't remember buying.

Not concerned with anyone's gender; anyone may apply. I'm not..... I'm not sure how exactly to describe its orientations, but if it likes your vibes, it might be attracted to you.

May consider casual sex on a case by case basis bc it does actually enjoy it usually, but do be warned: Graz is a dom, and you're not going to get it into a submissive role without sufficient bonding and skill.

[queers-gambit]

Bloodhounds

prompt: you and your husband have a different kind of foreplay that include disguises, sneaking out of the castle, and sometimes, fucking in an alleyway... Or two.

pairing: Aemond Targaryen x highborn!female!reader no specified House

fandom masterlist: House of the Dragon

word count: 5.7k+

note: also NO physical description of skin, hair, but height IS mentioned inna way and weight IS insinuated because - let's face it - fucking against a wall ain't easy!! this is a STAND ALONE.

warnings: poor excuse for smut, explicit / descriptive language, i guess this is porn with a plot?? (surprise!) there's cursing, Cherry needs to get laid ASAP, stop giving her internet access!! half-edited, author mildly gave up. ✅ spoiler free

"My Lady, how go your studies? Aemond says you're making grand progress," Alicent smiled, leaning back in her high-back chair with a goblet of wine in her always-tight manicured grip.

"Oh," you quickly swallowed the bit of food in your mouth, perfectly trained to take small bites for moments such as these - but also, because it was 'unladylike' to eat with fuller cheeks. With a quick dab of the cloth napkin left on your lap, you nodded at her, "My Lord husband likes to exaggerate. Studies are going well enough, My Queen, but surely, I've much farther to go."

She hummed in contemplation, "From what I've heard, you're planning a trip to Pentos?"

Ah, so this is the reason she wanted you alone.

"I am wrestling with the idea, Lady," you assured softly, "yet, there has been no decision made, nor am I swaying any which way more heavily." You watched her carefully, "You have an opinion on the matter, do you not?"

"How can I not, sweet child," she sighed, setting her goblet down as you did the same to the utensils in hand, "when there is a possibility my son is leaving?"

You couldn't help it, truly. But the laugh was genuine, "My Queen! There is not a world in which I would dare take your son from you. If I decided to venture to Pentos, it will not be with my white-haired husband and his 180-year-old dragon. That warrants attention I do not wish for."

"You are a Targaryen now - "

"I do not look it," you nodded. "I have a no-name face and can still travel undetected. Your son cannot afford the same luxury."

"And yet, I cannot shake this feeling..."

"That feeling you feel is natural for every mother," you nodded, taking a sip of water to clear your mouth and throat of residue. "It is the dread that your children are growing up and will leave, like you were forced to as a girl." Her face was painted in earnest shock. "Do not think so little of me, Your Grace, I've done my fair share of familial research - but also, the maids like to gossip." Alicent chuckled some. "I am truly sorry for your mother, and that you had to leave home to live with your father here... But there will come a time your kids are going to spread their leathery wings and fly. If it's something I've learned in the few, short years of marriage? You cannot hold dragons back. Believe me when I say, I do not want to take your son from you, but should he make his decision, that's only his to make. For now, I am simply weighing pro's and con's. The idea of adventure is a little too tantalizing."

Alicent regarded you for a long moment before slowly nodding, "Then it shall be his decision."

"If you'd like, if I go and end up in Braavos or other, I'll send a barrel of spiced wine."

"Oh, you," she chuckled, waving you off some.

"How fairs the King?"

Alicent paused to smile softly at the woman she married her son to, and for a moment, let her heart beat with pride at such a fine young woman joining her family. Y/N L/N was a woman of great beauty and even greater brains, a woman her son could engage with; a woman she was pleased to see fit in effortlessly. There wasn't a single soul in the entire castle who did not like her - and it came in handy at times.

Y/N was also the only one who ever bothered to ask about Viserys anymore, too. So, Alicent smiled and nodded, "He has his good days and bad."

You nodded slowly. "I remember when my grandfather started to lose his mind... It was gradual, then one day, it was like a switch flipped. For the last few years of his life, he didn't know who I was, but with Mum and Da' out, workin', doin' whatever they needed to, I was with him day in and out... It wasn't easy."

"You've never spoke of your family before," Alicent sat up in intrigue. "Three years being married, six months of courting before that - and you've never spoke of them," Alicent looked at you with a sense of wonder.

"Some family's aren't worth the effort to discuss," you shrugged a bit. "The moment you sent word for the courting season, away I was swept, and my father was adamant on making a match. Can you imagine how happy he was to learn I was courting the Prince?"

"Was he?" Alicent asked softly, giving a knowing look.

"He kept asking if it were true, and asked if his dragon took his eye," you snickered to her. "Kept asking what rumors were true."

"Gods," she chuckled.

"I told him outlandish things," you admitted with a snicker. "He caught on eventually, cursed me to all Seven Hells... Stopped writing, and then word reaches me of his passing. Hm," you shrugged a bit.

"Well, you're better off without, yes?"

"Indeed, I'd say... Look, Your Grace, I have not made any decision about my travels. As of right now, I'm okay reading my books and letting my mind go on adventures - I will tell you when I have made a decision."

"All right..."

"You will be the second to know, after Aemond, of course."

She smiled, "Yes, yes. Of course."

You glanced out the window to the sun's position, finding it nearly completely gone, and turned to your mother-by-law. "Speaking of, I'm sure he's expecting me soon. I'll be going now," you stood slowly, waiting for her to stop you.

"Of course, yes, yes, go on," she smiled. "Thank you for tonight."

"Always my pleasure," you promised with a curtesy, turning after, and exiting the room. "Have a good evening, Ser Cole."

"And you, Princess," he nodded with a soft smile. "Good supper?"

"Oh, you know I have a love-affair with Chef Hayford's cooking," you chuckled, watching him return it with a nod of agreement.

Turning forward, you only had to travel a short way; mostly turning down three different stone corners to reach a more secluded hallway. Aemond preferred solitude, so, when you married, you snagged up the suite in the Western Wing that was newly renovated - but it was "sadly" away from most of the castle's traffic. So, of course it was perfect for the pair of you.

When you slipped in the door, Aemond was standing at the basin of water, shirtless, leaning heavily on the stone and wiping the back of his neck while lost in thoughtful contemplation.

"Aemond?" You questioned softly, shutting the door, and rushing for him. "Are you all right?" When in the light, you saw the discoloration of his skin, whispering, "Oh, my love..."

"It's not so bad," he answered in the same lowered tone.

"Liar."

"No, truly, it's not the worst I've had," Aemond straightened up, looking down at you with a soft smirk. "Hi, poppet."

"Hi," you smiled, letting him lean down some as you rocked to your toes to kiss him in greeting. "How was your day?"

"Cole was brutal in training, but it was good," he nodded, dropping the washcloth after wringing it out. "And yours, my love?"

"Well... Your mother's caught rumor of our plans..."

"What's that mean?"

"She directly asked if I mean to go to Pentos and if I mean to take you with me, as if to take you away from her."

"Gods," his eyes rolled, "swear, the walls have ears in this place."

"Tell me of it," your eyes rolled. "I think she's off the scent for now, but we should be more diligent and a little more careful..."

"Hmm," he considered, nodding after. "Yes, love. Right, then."

"Are you hungry?"

"I could eat."

"How about at Kavvin's?"

"In the city?"

You nodded with a grin, "Feelin' up for a game, love?"

Aemond turned to you fully, hands on your hips and a grin on his lips. "Yeah... Yeah, yeah, I could go for something to eat."

"Start there, then," you whispered.

"You've the time it takes me to clean up and change to get out of here," he smirked, forehead on yours.

You dashed around the room to change into a tunic, trousers, boots, and a thick muted-color cloak. Aemond chuckled to himself as you blew him an air kiss before sneaking through secret passage door... And away you went.

Once out of the Keep's grounds, it was easy enough to lose yourself in the city's streets; but kept to the plan and made for Kavvin's tavern. You slipped in and made quick work of finding the young lad, working on sopping up a puddle of ale, and dashing over to him.

"Princess," he chuckled some, eyeing you up and down. "What's it for you tonight, then?"

"Send him down the Street, I wanna see how far he'll go," you smirked some, squeezing his elbow as you slipped him a Gold Dragon as a tip.

"All right," he shrugged. "Want a drink while you wait?"

"Oh, please, you and I both know that man takes the longest fucking strides in the bloody Realm," you laughed a bit, Kavvin nodding in agreement. "If I want to win, I've gotta go."

"Back door's open," he smirked, pointing you off.

In fact, he had to restrain a laugh when not a full five minutes later, Aemond was stalking into the tavern - eye sweeping the area. He decided that for tonight, he was on your side, and made himself busy with other customers to stave off telling Aemond anything.

However, nobody flagged Kavvin down when they noted the hooded man with one eye stalk up to him.

"My Prince," Kavvin greeted softly, tossing the cloth he was using over his shoulder. "You're out late, aren't you?"

"Hardly," Aemond sighed some.

"Well, you will be," the lad smirked.

"Where's she off to?"

Kavvin shrugged, and Aemond slapped a Gold Dragon to his hand. "Uh, think she made mention of... Well, now that I think on it, 's a bit fuzzy, yeah?"

"Where, Kavvin?" Aemond growled, another coin dropped to his hand.

"Hm, yes," he examined the coin, "think she said something about goin' off down the Street, yes?"

"No, she didn't."

"Swear it, honest," Kavvin nodded. "Said she wanted to see how far you'd go tonight. You do somethin' to piss her off, mate?"

"Not that I'm aware of - though, she might think 'twas I who told the Queen of our plans."

"Well, that makes little sense," Kavvin chuckled, "for even I know, the idea to leave this wretched city was your own..."

"She's an easier scape goat for the courts and help to gossip about," Aemond frowned a bit. "The Street, you said?"

"Street of Silk," Kavvin agreed softly, offering a coin back, "honest, that's where she said she was headin'."

Aemond nodded and turned, leaving the bartender with his hand extended; but it quickly recoiled with a smirk as Aemond took leave. After a chuckle, Kavvin thumbed the coin to flip in the air; catching it in a swipe, then turning as he pocketed his extra coins as a few men grew louder and sloshed ale around - leaving Kavvin in for a long night tending his bar.

The Street of Silk was alive tonight, as it was all other nights. Lowly lit torches hung on the walls lined your way; most wearing hoods and darkened colors to hide themselves. Whores and Mistresses hung out of doorways and windows; hollering, snarling, laughing at any passing customer.

You didn't often dare to venture down this way, but tonight was special; you were in it to win. So, you ducked down a darkened alley and knocked three times, in a specific pattern, at the wooden door.

A moment later, it pulled open.

"What're you doin' here?" Tiyana smirked to you, leaning on the doorway. "My brithday or sum'thin'? Here ta treat me, is it?"

"Not tonight, my sweet," you smirked. "Carry a message for me?"

"To who?"

"My husband."

"Ain't no way," she shrugged. "He don't come down this way, no, ma'am. Ain't nobody seen the One-Eyed Prince 'round these parts since - well..."

"Yeah, yes, yes, I know. But he'll come this way, and I need you to catch his eye. Tell him to go by the markets."

"Oh - I get it," she laughed. "You two playin' that game, innit? Yeah? You two li'l freaks, is it?"

"A bit," you mused softly. "Will you do as I've asked?"

"Gonna come back and entertain me a bit?"

Your head cocked, eyeing her up and down, "Perhaps - though, my husband is often insatiable."

"Say that like I haven't eaten his cum out your cunt before, hey?" She smirked. "All right, yeah, fine, I'll tell 'im if he comes ta see me, yeah?"

"You're my favorite for a reason," you smirked, holding your hand out.

"Lady," Tiyana gasped, weighing the gold in her hand. "Th-This is more than I make inna month, it is! What'chu givin' it ta me for?"

"You've always been loyal and discreet," you eased. "Don't fail me tonight, love."

"Wouldn't dream of it," she grinned. "You're a right Gods-sent Lady, you is. I'll tell yah husband what you want - markets, you said?"

"Yeah, the market stalls," you nodded. "Thank you."

"Yeah, yeah, 'course," she smirked, nodding as you pushed off again into the city's streets.

This time, Aemond was slower to arrive on scene. He stood at the mouth of the rambunctious street, eyeing it with malcontent, but something in his stomach solidified and moved him forward. Bad thoughts and haunting memories swarmed Aemond's guts and mind, but still, he let his feet glide down the natural decline.

His eye surveyed the promiscuous activities around him, finding it would be the perfect place to catch you - but then, someone else was catching his eye.

She leaned in a low-bearing window, tits nearly fully popping out of her shirt; eyes rimmed in coal, and hair pulled off her neck. Her eyes ran over his hood and then noted the lack of an eye, motioning him forward. He didn't want to; there had been many who gestured to him all night, but for some reason, this was different... He glanced around, then moved forward.

"She's been to see you, Tiyana?"

"Not without you, Lord," the whore smirked, sitting herself on the window sill. "She's very loyal, that one."

"Being why you're helping her?"

"I'm helpin' yah both!" She laughed. "I want you both ta get laid, hey? So, listen, right? She went down that way," she pointed, "but said meet her in the markets?"

Aemond paused, lifting his gaze slowly. "Down that way?" He asked, pointing down the alley.

"Mhm - took a left, down there," Tiyana pointed, leaning out of the window a bit. "Can I ask something?"

Aemond sighed, glancing around them to the bustle of the drunken crowd. "Sure, what is it?"

"Why's it you two do this? Hey? Just wonderin' - life so bloody boring, you two need sex games?"

Aemond smirked a bit, "More like... We prefer to keep things interesting. You find new ways to get the blood pumping."

"I know a few ways," she smirked.

"I know," he whispered in agreement. "But you know the agreement - not without my wife."

"Wasn't tryna persuade yah, Princey, just wonderin' why yah's do this," she smirked.

"Keeps things... Fresh."

"Hmm," she nodded.

"Think a hunter and prey, yes?"

Tiyana grinned, "Ah, yes, there it is - yeah. All right, fair enough, my Prince. She went that way, but said markets."

"You're a hidden gem," Aemond smirked some, dropping more coins in her hand.

"And you two are me favorite customers," she winked. "Go on, get goin', she's waitin' on yah out there! Fuck 'er good for me, lad! Hey-hey!" She laughed loudly as Aemond pushed off, heading down the alley he was pointed towards.

Slowly, the sounds of the city fell behind him and Aemond noted the way this path took him closer to the water-ways. With a small smirk, he made a judgement call and ducked down a different alley; peering around to slink in the darkness.

Like a bloodhound on the scent after a weakening deer, the pair of you danced around one another; where one ducked into an alley, the other was tip-toeing away. He grew tired of waiting and decided to look around the market like you had said.

It was there in the maze of market stalls that you saw him, smirking as you quickly exchanged your cloak for a different colored one. From there, you picked up an abandoned basket and slunk around the outskirts of the stalls. You kept an eye on Aemond, moving when he did; keeping distance between you but feeling a little frisky.

So, you took a risk, and casually strolled by him as if intent on picking from the plum cart.

He didn't notice you; your eyes watching from under the hood as his tall figure allowed him to peer over heads. Again, you ducked around the few carts and stalls, just watching him for another moment.

Then, you ventured close to the apples... And again, Aemond was too busy glaring at a man who bumped into his shoulder to notice. You took another risk, and dared asking the vendor a question - voice clear on the air. Still, he did not notice.

After another few minutes of watching him turn in confusion, wondering where you could've gone, Aemond started towards the closest tavern - thinking maybe you were hidden in plain sight.

How right he was, but unknowing.

You crept around, exchanging your cloak again before jogging after your husband. However, when you peaked around the doorway of the tavern, you noticed how the white-haired man you loved and adored had effortlessly melted into the crowd, and now, you were back at a disadvantage.

Learning from past mistakes, you quickly turned and let your legs pump with effort to rush away from the markets.

Around a few corners and down two alleyways, you were arriving at the bay port - but only had a moment to recognize your surroundings before a hand clamped over your mouth as another quickly coiled around your middle to pin your arms.

You gasped into the calloused hand, feeling the strong chest slam into your back before forcing you back a few steps. With gritted teeth, you were slammed into the stone wall of one of the darkened alleyways. However, your eyes settled on your 'attacker' and quickly slitted. "Husband," you identified.

"Wife," Aemond smirked. "You're getting predictable, love."

"How'd you know?"

He shrugged, "I felt your eyes on me in the markets and figured I could blend in at the tavern. From there, I knew you'd follow to keep an eye on me, so, I waited, and when I saw you rush away, I took a shortcut."

"Mhm," you hummed, lifting your chin as he leered over you. "I did learn something tonight."

"What's that, my darling?"

"You blend in rather effortlessly when your hair's covered," you muttered as he slowly stepped closer so you were nearly cowering into the brick behind you. "Might do us well, after all... Should we choose to leave..."

Aemond's one hand rose to hold your jaw as the other planted against the wall to corral you to him. "You say that as if my mind's changed."

"Has it?"

"Not in the slightest," he promised, petting his thumb over your lips to catch the bottom one. "Where you go, I go, and away from this wretched fucking city is where I want us to be."

"You'd leave them?" You asked with a smirk. "Leave your family? For me?"

"For my own family?" He corrected, nodding, "Yes, I would've left yesterday if I knew."

"How fucked everything has become?" You whispered sadly, lifting a hand to pet down his collarbone and rest against his pectoral.

"Something like that," he nodded, lifting a knee to separate your legs. "You'd go with me? When the time comes, you'd go with me?"

With a sigh, you nodded, trying not to grind down on his thigh. "Anywhere, my Prince - anywhere you want, we'll go."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," you all but whimpered as the hand that once caressed your skin then moved to a bruising grip around your neck.

"Hold still," he nodded, "I won, yes?"

"Mhm."

"Then hold still while I claim my prize," he smirked, yanking his dagger from under his cloak and slowly dragging the pointed tip down your stomach. He didn't press hard, instead, dragging it between your skin and the cloth of your trousers. "Good girl," he crooned as he let the dagger's blade slit the seam of your pants.

"Aemond," you glanced up the alley nervously, body nearly trembling from anticipation.

"Shhh," he nodded, leaning in to breath in your scent. One arm wrapped around your waist, the other working to literally cut a slit in your trousers; letting his tongue flatten against your pulse point.

"Aemond," you whimpered, holding onto him tightly.

"Good girl," he purred again, sheathing his dagger and letting his hand drop again to then pet up your dampening slit from outside the cloth of clothing. "Easier, yeah?" He smirked against your ear, breathing deeply as he let his pointer finger push into your heat, praising, "So warm for me. But I need you wetter than this to take you - don't wanna hurt you, pet."

You groaned a little, holding onto him while keeping a leg up his hip. "What if someone sees?" You whispered against his mouth, practically mewling like a bitch in heat.

"Let them," he nodded, "all they'd see is a man, pleasuring his wife." Your breathing subtly changed as his mouth hung over your ear, promising, "Splitting her in two, watching as she takes his cock so fucking well. That's all they'd see, pet."

"Fuck."

"Hmm, fuck you how?" He smirked, letting a second finger join his first. "Want me to bend you over? Fuck you on the floor? Find those barrels back there?"

"Against the wall, want you t'take me against the wall," you nodded, a sheen of sweat slowly forming over your skin. "Wanna feel you in my fuckin' lungs, yeah?"

"Whatever my pretty girl wants, she gets," Aemond growled, slapping your hands off him and readjusting you two. "C'mon, love, earn it - up, jump up, c'mon." When you did, he caught you easily, grunting, "Atta girl. Hang on," he panted then, pressing you against the wall as he adjusted to hold you against the wall while freeing his cock.

"Aemond, please, please," you begged softly, holding his jaw with both hands, "Gods, I need you to fuck me so bad."

"C'mere," he seethed, hoisting you a little higher to adjust his cock at your (cloth-cut) entrance. You both gave guttural moans as he let you sink onto him, grinding your hips into his to better adjust. "Fuckin' grippin' me too tight, love," he growled, hands squeezing your hips as you kept hold of his neck and shoulders.

"Gonna last f'me?"

"Might just have to pump you full, hmm?" He smirked, using his chest to slam into yours and righten your spine. His hand shot up to constrict around your neck, the other used to hold you on his hips; making your legs work overtime to stay atop him.

"Oh, Gods, fuck," you whimpered, hood still over both your heads as Aemond rammed into you.

"Told you - wasn't wet enough," he cursed in your ear.

"Feels fuckin' amazing, please, don't stop," you begged him, hearing his small grunts and growls start up as both hands moved to hold either thigh and keep you spread against the wall. "Oh, my Gods," you sobbed, truly unsure if you were feeling pleasured or not from the feeling of Aemond fucking through you.

"Ah, fuck, fuck," he hissed, hips stuttering as he met his first orgasm.

"Wow... That was record time," you teased quietly when he paused to keep you full to the hilt of his emptying cock.

"I warned yah," he smirked some, readjusting his hold as sweat coated his skin. "My cum just makes you wetter, hey? Yeah, look at that," he hissed, eye cutting down to watch his cock slowly pull back; revealing webs of cum between you and him.

Your hands pawed at his neck, tugging him forward; whining against his mouth, "I need more, please."

He smirked, "Gonna be a good girl and hold it all in until we get back to the Keep?"

You whispered, "What if I can't?"

"I'll just have to fill you again..." His cock twitched, making his throat bob. "Want your belly swollen with our kid, 's 'bout time, isn't it? For the Gods to bless us?"

"Yet you talk of leaving the city - "

"All the more reason," he promised, still holding you spread as he let his hips start up again; rutting into you slowly. "Protect you, protect our kid," he muttered into your neck, "get away from this fucking place - be safe. Be together - oh shit," he moaned.

"Yeah," you grinned, holding him to your neck; clenching your muscles to make him whine, "that's right, emotional intimacy turns you on, doesn't it? Hey?"

"Fuck - yes, yes, it does," he promised, starting to pick up his pace. "Just want you pregnant already, fuck's sake."

"Then fill me," you purred, clenching your teeth when his fully-swollen cock once more stabbed through you. "I wanna make you a Daddy."

"Shit," he breathed, turning his head when he heard noises; but did not stop. Three men and two women stumbled down the alley, drunk, cooing when they saw the couple against the wall.

"Ye-ahhh!" One leered.

"Give it to 'er!" Another hollered.

"Fucking fill me," you followed right after in his ear. "Oh, fuck, yes, please, right there," you hissed as he pinned you harder to the cold stone behind you, the group of five passing with their eyes glued to the pair of you. It was oddly erotic, spurring Aemond on as your mouth hung open in a silent scream.

His balls jackhammered into the wet apex of your cunt as his arms all but braced against you to keep you in place. You were moldable, you were limp, you were taunt with pleasure at the same time; you were a twitching, moaning mess when feeling returned to your limbs as his thumb found your clit.

"Take it, I know my girl can take it," Aemond growled, humping up into you to create friction at that special, gummy spot on your inner walls. "Oh, so fuckin' good, just take it, my precious girl," he praised, hearing the group still stumbling about at the other end of the alley.

"Why don't you fuck me like that?" One of the girls growled in annoyance.

"I can't hold yah like tha', by the Gods," her partner laughed.

Your hand slapped outward against the stone when your husband rubbed your clit in time with his thrusts; letting his mouth open slightly to bite at your shoulder and encourage you to do the same.

You came with a cry, mouth full of his shoulder's flesh; rolling your hips into his with your booted heels pressing into the meat of his arse as waves of pleasure rippled across your beings. Aemond wasn't far behind and when his cock was almost strangled by the clenching of your walls, he came for a second time.

It was enough for you both, panting in effort as your legs were numb. Aemond slowly pulled out of you, hearing you stutter to breath as his cum instantly pumped out to drip onto the pavement beneath you.

"Gods," Aemond breathed in shock, watching the puddle slowly grow.

"Ah!" You yelped when he lowered you, and your legs gave way; his arms darting out to instantly cling onto you as the back of your head thumped into the wall.

"Shit, love, all right?" His hand pressed to the tender spot as you pouted some. The group that watched had since passed, leaving you alone again with split trousers that grew wetter from the ooze of cum. Aemond was trying to catch his breath and support you at the same time, readjusting your clothes for you best he could. "Got it, love?"

"Can't feel my bloody legs," you complained lightly.

"C'mere, I've got you," he promised, arms tight around your waist. "Did good tonight, pet."

"But I lost?"

"'S not about winning or losing, in the end, we both reap benefits, yes?" You nodded. "And as you said, tonight gave you reassurance we could blend in across the Narrow Sea, did it not?"

"It did," you agreed. "But I want to wait until next month, I want to know if it's stuck."

"I'll fuck you everyday until then, yes? Breed you, like I know you want me to," he smirked, one arm holding you up to walk in front of him as the other fingered down the crack of your arse. "Keep walking, don't make a scene," he whispered in your ear, pushing his fingers into your cunt as you lead the way through King's Landing. It wasn't the most comfortable, but Aemond made it doable; pausing in another alleyway to push your chest to the stone wall.

"Aemond," you cursed his name into the wall brushing your cheek.

"Easy," he chuckled, nudging your feet apart. "Take me once more and I'll carry you home."

"Aemond?" You reared back a little when his hardened cock pushed into you again.

"What do you need?"

Your hand raised to pet over his cheek, back bowed to hold yourself up and keep him inside you. "Make me a Mommy, please," you whispered, earning a sharp slap to your arse cheek before his hands seized control of your hips.

"Hold it in this time, then," he teased, starting to thrust into you like a wild horse; bucking his hips into yours to create ripples across your flesh. It seemed as if your frantic motions in the middle of the alley deterred anyone from turning down it, leaving a brief moment of privacy in the sweltering city night.

One of his hands slithered up your front to fondle your breast, tweaking a nipple until you were nearly collapsing into the wall. Aemond had to hold you slightly as you bent lower, almost desperate to take him to the hilt as you fucked back against him - and he took full advantage of your new position.

Aemond kept his feet with your own, hands on your hips; thrusting harder into you as sweat beaded on his skin to roll down his pearly flesh. "Fuck, Gods be fucking good," he cursed, "how's it you're this tight, still? Hey?"

You whimpered wordlessly, gasping when one of Aemond's thumbs came to gently rim around your puckered hole. He didn't often let himself explore your arse, but sometimes, to catch you off guard, he liked testing your limits. After making him venture down the Street of Silk by himself, he figured a little payback was in order.

A stranger started down the alley and actually paused to watch the pair of you, Aemond's spit being spat from his mouth onto your holes; winking in the distant moonlight.

"Take it," Aemond growled when your legs gave way, and sent you both careening into the dirty floor. It only spurred him on further.

"Don't stop," the stranger recommended, loosening his breeches to take his cock out and pump himself to life.

Aemond, fully enraptured with the feel of your cunt, let his hand latch onto the back of your neck to hold you in place as he thrust harder, harder, harder into you. Your hips bruised from the way he pounded you into the cobblestone, growling as he glanced at the stranger.

"Oh, shit," the man nodded, pumping faster. "Yeah - look me in the eyes, mate, that's it."

"The fuck?" You whispered, glancing up to watch.

"Eyes on him, Princess," Aemond demanded, fully hunched over you as he felt his stomach's coil tighten; informing you, "almost there, precious girl, keep bein' a good fuckin' girl - oh, ah fuckin' Hell!"

"Oh, yeah," the stranger nodded. "Can I cum on her, mate?"

"You wanna die?" Aemond snapped.

"Lemme use her mouth," the stranger complained, head tossed back and eyes screwed shut. "Betta yet, lemme a turn!"

Aemond gasped behind you, stalling his hips into the meat of your bum while letting his cock pump you full of his seed. He recovered much quicker than you, kissing your temple as he unsheathed himself from your velvet warmth to stand, tuck himself away, and stride up to the man still masturbating to the sight of your swollen, dripping cunt.

"Woah - hang on - wait, wait, wait!" The man gasped as Aemond stabbed him non-fatally in the ribs.

"Go - before I decide I need your life for even looking at her," he sneered, shoving the man away while yanking his dagger free. A splatter of blood echoed in-between your heaving breaths.

When he turned back, he smirked at the sight of you; fucked-out and unable to find your feet, limp on the dirt-riddled cobblestone. "You didn't have to do that," you told him softly when he neared you to adjust what was left of the tatters of your clothes.

"I did," he smirked. "C'mere, up yah get. Think my wife's earned a hot bath, don't you?"

"Will you join me?" You asked, letting him lift you bridal style. The cloak was long enough that when he picked you up, it covered your cum-soaked hole in his arms.

"I can't resist you, pet," he frowned, "we wouldn't be doin' much cleaning, hey?"

"So?" You smirked, arms tight around his neck. "I want to make you a Daddy, Aemond, best we... Do our due diligence, yes?"

"You make a fair point, Princess," he smirked. "If you can handle it, I'll fuck you the rest of the night, yes?"

"I'm an orgasm behind," you reminded softly as he chose a lesser-used secret entrance into the Red Keep.

"Hm, yes, I seem to owe you one," he smirked in agreement. "Better stay awake, then."

requesting rules and masterlist

HOTD masterlist

[tragedyslut]

♡ dad, would you wash my back this once? ♡

✶ [ j.miller ] ✶

♡ FATHER!JOELMILLER X FEM!TEEN!READER ♡

🩷 SUMMARY — he abandoned you for ellie, you thought youd never forgive him. alt timeline<3 intentional lowercase, no proofreading 🪽

your father joel miller was a vain man. after the loss of Sarah, he wasn't the same. which, was an obvious thing. having the last name miller gave you a 'higherachy'. people respected you. but the name didn't mean anything to you.

not anymore.

after ellie came around, joel was never there for you. even less than he used to be. the memories of before the apocalypse swarmed your brain. in some ways, you were jealous of ellie. she got the father figure you never did.

in other ways, you were worried for her. you were only 2 years older than her, 16.

joel had his third chance. you hoped that he wouldn't fuck things up like he did with you.

you still lived in jackson, in you and joels house. you would sleep in his old bed whenever you missed him.

you two had left the quarantine zone with and met Ellie. then, you three resided in jackson for a while. Joel promised that he would deliver ellie to the fireflies and be done with it.

but he broke that promise. he left with her in the middle of the night, only telling Tommy that he was taking ellie to a lab in Colorado.

well, to make a long story short, ellie died in that lab. you knew joel would never forgive himself, and apart of you wanted that. he wanted him to feel as much pain as you did when he abandoned you for some girl he barely knew. you did feel bad that ellie was dead, obviously. it isn't her fault that your dads a prick.

after ellies death, joel returned to jackson. you had no idea he was coming, and when he came you just happened to be on guard duty. you were a sniper, thats what you were good at. and you hated being on the front lines with a pistol, it pissed you off.

though today you wished you had just taken the front lines. approaching the gates, was your father. he looked.. broken. upset, to say the least.

you sighed, putting your rifle to the side and hopping off the gated wall to to unlock the gate for him.

he saw you and immediately looked like he was going to cry. it had been months since you last saw each other. though, your stoic expression didn't falter as you simply locked the gate behind him.

" .. y/n. look. im sorry. " joel immediately tried to blurt out. you shot him daggers.

" you broke your promise. i don't care how sorry you are. " you said, trying not to burst into tears.

joel sighed, knowing he couldn't change what happened. he had found that out too many times. with sarah, then ellie, now you.

he went forward and hugged you, not caring if you tried to push him away. but to his surprise, and your own, you didn't.

" kid.. i know. i fucked up but- i want to make it up to you. i want to be here. " he mumbled, you just shook your head.

" you can be here. but i ain't your kid anymore. "

that night, you two were in joels old house for the first time in ages. it felt so right, but so wrong. you stayed in your room the rest of the day, sobbing. you didn't care that joel could hear you, the walls were that paper thin that he could always hear you moving even the slightest bit.

he stood just outside the door for ages, wanting to come in and comfort you.. but he couldn't. he knew that. you needed to come round yourself.

he spent that night cooking your favourite dinner. once he was done, he came and knocked on your door.

" .. y/n. uhm. i cooked dinner. you should come down and get some. "

he said loudly, but he didn't hear anything in response. he hesitantly stepped into the room, and saw you curled up in a ball. you had cried yourself to sleep. he couldn't stop himself, he immediately went over and took you into his arms. he held you so tight. he never thought he'd be able to do that again.

he held you for hours, the idea of dinner being long forgotten. when you woke up and felt him holding you, it only made you start crying again. but not out of pain or sadness, but relief.

" its okay baby girl.. ive got you. i promise. " he said, just glad to have you in his arms again.

that night, you couldn't sleep. you missed him. you had this horrible feeling that he would leave again in the middle of the night. so you got up, creeping into his room. you stood in his door way, until he teared his eyes open, staring at you.

" kiddo? you okay? " he mumbled, sitting up.

" dad- can i.. stay in here tonight.. just this once? " you whispered out.

he nodded, letting you climb into bed with him. he held you all night, just enjoying being back with his daughter. you both knew that this wouldn't be 'just this once', but in a way that was a good thing. you both wouldn't ever be apart again. he wasn't leaving.

[familyagrestefanblog]

Sorry, I just need to get this off my chest.

You know what's shit?

That I always come back to work on my explanation posts on why Alya, Plagg, and Emonette being treated unfairly and being disregarded by Maribug's writing is by now pissing me off to similar degrees as her bad treatment of Chat Noir

But that always ends in a domino effect of me putting together more of the overall narrative that ticks me off so much cause my ADD brain can't NOT look for the continuous string of the writing pattern I follow once I'm at it.

You probably can imagine that this isn't very good for my mental health and the only reason why I'm still doing it is because I have a strong suspicion on what the new story arc will do with Cerise after this agonizing hiatus, and only once the actual new story arc proves me wrong can my ADD brain let this emotional investment of 7+ years in my "comfort show" since I was a 16 rest in peace.

Being neurodivergent is exhausting of FUCK...

So I always stop writing any of the posts about the other topics and come back to my Adrichat corner because that's the "safe space" my brain is the most familiar and comfortable with by now since season 4 to make a post AT ALL that isn't running the risk of leading me down 7 new rabbit holes I can't unsee anymore afterwards...

I MISS looking into several narrative threads in this show and voicing my opinions on them. In hindsight, I regret not having done it more when it was still possible, but I feel like it should have been alright in any other normally written show to have a fan blog dedicated to a specific part of the story. I feel like I shouldn't be the one in the WRONG for having done that.

Anyway, I honestly MISS the time where I knew that Maribug's benefit and comfort weren't the only things accepted as "valid" readings of the story. From both sides. Supporters and critics/salters.

Where saying anything that isn't immediately connected to Marinette's benefit and comfort didn't need a full-blown 20 page essay post going into any detail possible to fight for the right to even be taken seriously as a realistic reading of the story at all.

I know I'm not the only one upset at this, but I wonder how many people really realized by now how batshit insane this is right now. That only the most vanilla and vague-ass posts that do their best to not in anyway say something that would be "mean" and "non-validating" to Marinette can be posted now without it automatically being categorized as at least "critical" or running the risk of getting perceived as salt or wishful-thinking.

You can't point ANYTHING out anymore without at least one person running in and either saying "You just HATE Marinette and want to see her punished! You people never care about HERRRRRRRRRR (regarding a topic that isn't about her or is her fucking JOB as a narrative tool to DO)" or "Yeah, nah, the show would never let that happen because of the Marinette bias lol"

You can't even say anything anymore about Adrien's abuse without it being either undermined to all hell because of Marinette having been bullied and needing to be a girlboss who does to others what she's declared "tortured" for, or Félix "hypocrite and victim-blamer" Fathom. Gabriel being abusive was once the most basic ass thing to talk about, what the fuck happened?? (don't answer that, I know the answer...)

The whole analysis' side of this fandom that isn't catering to Marinette was either killed or basically exiled into the "critical" or outright "salt" tag because you can't even be interested in world-building anymore without having to fight for the post's right to be taken seriously under the crushing weight of Marinette's narrative benefits and comfort.

Because mademoiselle ain't fucking interested in ANYTHING lore wise beyond what's convenient for her (not to mention the retcons), so talking about the Guardian and Kwami lore for example counts as SALT now because it automatically implies for people that Marinette isn't all that matters and her flaws of not being interest in ANYTHING might actually COUNT as flaws she should work on. I know, the fucking HORROR! 😱

I MISS writing theories, analysis posts, and speculating about this shows future plots in even the most basic "set up and pay off" manner but I know I can't because my default approach is always complementary to the main character - meaning what challenges them and the narrative the most to grow, expand, and develop. This isn't a Marinette specific thing, I ALWAYS do this.

And contrary to popular belief in this fandom, I get by perfectly fine doing that for the majority of other pieces of media I consume. It is MIRACULOUS and this damn Fandom that now genuinely did it's best to convince themselves that this level of main character centric morality and revenge porn level writing is NORMAL when it's seriously NOT.

There is a REASON why this show hardly ever gets recommended on social media the way one would think despite its success. Or why the Fan backlash is so enormous despite a solid part of the Fandom already having left long ago and the young target demographic not uniformly having a voice in the social media discourse.

Or why people actively advise others AGAINST watching the show, AGAINST forming an emotional investment, and AGAINST going anywhere near the Fandom.

Cause no fucking shit, this isn't normal.

[deadprompts]

𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝚆𝙰𝙻𝙺𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝙳𝙴𝙰𝙳 𝚂𝙴𝙰𝚂𝙾𝙽 𝟷 𝙿𝚁𝙾𝙼𝙿𝚃𝚂.

content warning applies. change any pronouns / wording if necessary.

there's us and the dead.

this is what takes us down.

the tragedy of their loss cannot be overstated.

i'm gonna get shit-faced drunk again

you should've seen the look on his face when i punched out his front teeth.

you're still a dumbass.

nice moves there, clint eastwood.

i think tomorrow i'm gonna blow my brains out.

y'all be more polite to a man with a gun!

zero tolerance for walkers.

that's the biggest lie there is.

we're safe here.

it's not a toy.

i know how the safety works.

keep drinking, little man.

do not enter the city.

bright side, it'll be the fall that kills us.

you may think you do but you don't.

living underground doesn't help; not knowing if it's day or night.

wish i could have done it a month ago.

friend, you need glasses.

there's good news?

it was worth every minute of it just to see that prick spit his teeth out on the ground.

i finally got the scrubbers in the east sector shut down to save power.

there were dozens of 'em.

eww. that's nasty.

maybe we got a second chance.

help me now, show me the way.

i didn't behave, i know.

screw you, man.

sometimes they fall short.

you take that stupid hat and go back to "on golden pond."

you the new sheriff come riding in to clean up the town?

cozy in there?

the only reason i got away was 'cause the dead were too busy eating my family.

i don't even know why i'm talking to you.

that's my boy.

this is our extinction event.

how far do you think i can chuck this, huh?

things are different now.

if you see anything, holler. i'll come running.

go on, tell me what to do.

hey kid, what'd you do before all this?

what are the odds, huh?

i know what i want to say.

i see a chance to make a new start.

i remember my dream now.

i ain't begged you before, i ain't gonna start begging now.

i know i'm being punished.

it wasn't my intention.

i can't let a man die of thirst.

i wanna see how red your face can get.

the world ended, didn't you get the memo?

we survive this by pulling together, not apart.

anybody that gets in the way of that is gonna lose.

it scares the fish.

thought i'd get to drive at least for a few more days.

i'll give you a moment to think about that.

i'm sorry this happened to you.

i'm old enough.

it belongs to the dead now.

maybe we'll get to steal another one someday.

nobody is gonna hurt you, okay?

they came out of nowhere.

saves me the embarrassment.

that's the bad news.

can i learn to shoot?

you pull the trigger, you have to mean it.

not many people get that.

bites kill you.

just...feeling very...off.

words can be meager things.

what he would or wouldn't do doesn't interest me.

what do you say to that?

guess the world changed.

the fever burns you out, but then after a while... you come back.

hell yes you're gonna learn.

you heard me, bitch.

the weak get taken.

there's no clinical progress to report.

still not sleeping well, can't seem to keep regular hours.

we gotta do it carefully, teach you to respect the weapon.

we are surviving here.

too bad i never studied engineering.

yeah, whatever, yee haw.

they might not seem like much one at a time, but in a group all riled up and hungry, man you watch your ass.

one thing i do know, don't you get bit.

we don't kill the living.

no crying in the boat.

i bet there isn't a single son of a bitch still listening out there, is there?

that's no way for anything to die, let alone a human being.

you don't know what it's like out there.

you're surrounded by walkers.

we don't have to be afraid anymore.

who voted you king boss?

we left him like an animal caught in a trap.

the line is pretty clear.

admit it, you only came back to atlanta for the hat.

i can see you make a habit of missing the point.

it's only a matter of time.

is this real?

there's us and the dead.

you got a problem?

there's too many of those things.

i never told them what i really thought.

i ain't so worried about some dumb dead bastard.

i'm a glass half full kinda guy.

it's the same as it ever was.

who the hell are you, man?!

[beargraphs]

Heathers the Musical | Sentence Starters contains. sex-references, insults, suicide-refs, alcohol & drug ref.

"I believe I'm a good person."

"What did you say to me, skank?"

"Yeah, you're on Jiffy Pop detail"

"She/He is a mythic bitch"

"For a greasy little nobody, you do have good bone structure"

"Why now are you pulling on my dick?"

"You just gotta prove, you're not a pussy anymore!"

"You're not a lame ass anymore!"

"Hey, mister no-name kid...so who might you be?

"It's fine if you don't agree...but I would fight for you, If you would fight for me."

"When everything numbs, who needs cocaine?"

"Does your mommy know you eat all that crap?"

"Freeze your brain, shatter your skull, fight pain with more pain."

"Let's rub each other's backs, while watching porn on Cinemax!"

"So, it's salt, and then lime, and then shot?"

"Fill that joint and roll it tight, ain't nobody home tonight!"

"I think that's what they call "Third base"."

"Showing up here took some guts, time to rip them out."

"People wouldn't hate you so much if you acted normal."

"There's no alcohol in here! Are you trying to poison me?

"I need it hard, I'm a dead girl walkin'!"

"I'm hot and pissed and on the pill."

You say you're numb inside, but I can't agree."

"Slap me! Pull my hair! Touch me there and there and there!"

"What is her final statement to a cold, uncaring planet?"

"No one sees the me inside of me..."

"I am more than just a source of handjobs."

"Once, you were geeky and nerd, now you’re flirty, freaky, and dirty."

"I bit my tongue so long, I learned to count to ten."

"Move bitch, this my song!"

"Our love is God."

"I worship you, I'd trade my life for yours."

"Oh, well, I was hoping you could rip my clothes off me, sport."

"What the fuck have you done?!"

"I've been thinking. Praying. Reading some magazines. And it's time we opened our eyes!"

"We're "damaged". Really "damaged". But that does not make us "wise"."

"Don't stop looking in my eyes."

"The revolution came and went, tried to change the world, barely made a dent."

"So [NAME]! I'm ending our affair, and I faked it, every single time!"

"We'll sink any minute, so someone must go."

"There's nowhere to hide."

"You don't deserve to live!"

"Here have a sedative!"

"Now we're all grown up and we know better..."

"But I believe that any dream worth having, is a dream that should not have to end."

"You don't know what my world looks like!"

"Knock! Knock! Sorry for coming in through the window. Dreadful etiquette, I know!"

"We'll watch the smoke pour out the doors, bring marshmallows, we'll make s'mores! We can smile and cuddle while the fire roars!"

"You left me and I fell apart. I punched the wall and cried.."

"Please don't leave me alone. You were all I could trust. I can't do this alone."

"This little thing? I'd hardly call this a bomb."

"I wish we'd met before, they convinced you life is war!

"I am damaged, far too damaged, but you're not beyond repair."

"Hope you'll miss me, wish you'd kiss me."

"You look like hell."

"I just got back."

"Are there any happy endings?"

"If no one loves me now, someday somebody will."

"We'll make it beautiful."

[3xm-draconic]

Homestead. (werebat Cyris and astarion)

Summary: Astarion tells Cyris about the little community the spawn created in the underdark, Cyris decides to visit… 

As it turns out a giant 30ft brain is really, REALLY fucking hard to find…

They needed to deal first with Orin and then Gortash, to get their crystals so the Emperor (this mindflayer who wanted to help them out) could use them to stop the elder brain.

In the meantime though…they could rest and wait…

“So the spawn and some of your siblings made a little home in the underdark?” Cyris pondered as he and Astarion shopped around for supplies…well mostly groceries for tonight, Cyris was going to make red wine & blood tomato pasta.

Just because they were not…exactly “together” anymore did not mean he’d have to stop cooking for him…or treating him to nice things.

He does love him still…

“Yes, it’s a…lovely place” Astarion smiled weakly “it’s in a little ruin, in a secluded vail were hundred of bloodcrystals grow, bloodcyrstal vail they’ve been calling it… hence the name” he said as he picked out a few fresh tomatoes.

“Hmm…Perhaps I could visit, you could show me around?”, “that sound rather nice” Astarion hummed “they’ve been learning to live off the land, they have a few Rothe they’ve domesticated, rightnow there isn’t really enough blood to go around so they mix it with Rothe milk and mushroom flower to make a grule of sorts” he grimaced “gods…I wish I could help them more but…”

“But?” Cyris pondered as he gently placed a hand on Astarion’s shoulder, “I…I feel like there is not much I can do, they’ve been talking about hunting the kuo toa who live near the lake…gods I can’t have them falling into doing that, eating such things” Astarion sighed “I feel like they are basically back to starving”.

“Well maybe I can help, I was able to find us plenty to eat down in the underdark when we were last there, take me to them and I’ll teach a few tips and tricks.” 

“I also heard you got back in contact with your village, they got your letters finally!” Astarion beamed, Cyris smiled happily “yhea, they were pretty happy to hear from me…they even sent me a few care packages, just some cookies, blood vials and a blanket” he grinned.

The place was…a dump.

There were tents haphazardly set up, fires set in little alcoves, trash everywhere…

Jeez it was a mess, even the slums in waterdeep looked nicer…

“Starry you said this place was nice”, “well…it’s a bit of a fixer-upper darling” he chuckled nervously, “Greeting Cyris…Astarion” Sebastian said as he set down a barrel of dried fish “good to see you again”.

“Good to see you to Seb” Cyris smiled and shook his hand “I hear you needed a little helping hand around here, I came as soon as I could”, Sebastian cocked his head in confusion “what could you help with?”, “well for starters, food, you all need blood to really survive and there are plenty of sources besides Rothe and fish, I can help you find them. Then…I wanna help you clean this place up and set up propper houses, Astarion and I got in contact with Max and my village, they sent over some supplies, Starry can help everyone get started on that while you and me go hunting.”  

Sebastion blinked “you…you got us all this?...thank you!” he hugged him, “ah it’s alright, it’s the least starry and I can do” Cyris smiled.

The creatures of the underdark were fearsome but easy to track once you learned their patterns, a coordinated group of vampires using battle tactics surprisingly managed to take them out quite well.

A few Hook-Horrors were easily outwitted and outmatched by their little hunting party, they now had gallons of blood to drink.

“This is wonderful, Cyris!” Sebastian said as he licked the blood from his lips “at this rate we should be able to feed everyone”, “we ain't done yet Seb, I’am going to teach all of you cooking and preserving techniques to make this stuff last” Cyris turned to him as he hefted a barrel of blood over his shoulder.

At their camp Cyris showed his team of spawn how to cook and preserve blood.

Blood bread with mushroom flour was one thing and cooking it into sausages was another but they could let it congeal into a block, cut it up  and grill it on sticks or mix it with cave fruit into a pasty jam and turn it into a sort of blood-fruit leather.

 They could also mix it with alcohol…a very simple method of preservation and a nice drink, salting the congealed blood and letting it dry into a powder that could be rehydrated was however by far the best.

 “Amazing! Now it will last us weeks, MONTHS even!” Sebastian smiled “I was starting to doubt that Astarion really cared about us…I guess I was mistaken if he brought you here”, “Starry cares about you, all of you, he wants to make up for his mistakes and give you guys a second chance at things…like he now has” Cyris placed a hand on Sebastian’s shoulder.

“...I…don’t know if I can forgive him for doing this to me…but I can thank him for trying to make things right, to give us this chance at living again, even though Cazador escaped…I don’t think he will come after us, he is afraid of Astarion…of you and your friends. We have you to thank for our freedom just as much as we have Astarion to thank” Sebastian smiled.

“Wait? The bastard escaped?” Cyris worriedly looked at Sebastian, “yes sadly” he mumbled, “well…looks like I have another head to add to my hunt” Cyris growled.

 “There now THAT’S much better!” Cyris beamed as he and his troop brought their haul back to the now refurbished town.

There was no more garbage, little homes were actually built, a market was even set up with an alchemy shop, tailor, salon and, Cyris laughed “you guys really built a Tavern down here?”

“You’ll never believe what happened while you were away!” Astarion excitedly hugged Cyris, “well what happened?”, “some deep gnomes came by, they saw all the bloodcrystals we had and wanted to set up a mining outpost, they offered to trade gold and other resources, mostly more Rothe blood to us in exchange for some land and the bloodcrystals” Astarion hummed “so…yes we built a tavern so everyone could enjoy a nice drink now that we have more blood. A celebration is in order, I do believe?” he grinned, “Sounds good to me” Cyris smiled.

The wine, the food, the music… was decent. The tavern was pretty small and the bard they had played the accordion…but the candle light, the hearth and the atmosphere of merriment…that made Cyris happy.  

Cyris saw the deep gnomes who Astarion had talked about come in to have a drink with them, they had just gotten done mining…

Cyris could smell something…odd about them.

One of them sat down at a table next to his and Astarion’s, Cyris saw something on the gnome’s shoulder…a tattoo..

Black bat wings with a white crescent moon and a red 4 pointed star in them…

He then could smell it clearer…the familiar scent of…

The gnome looked up and sniffed the air…

They looked at one another.

“Are you?” Cyris pondered, “well bless my soul, another kindred” the gnome beamed happily, “another werebat!” Cyris smiled.

“Names Menphes, Menphes Gloombeard” the gnome proudly introduced himself, “pleasure to meet ya boy” he shook Cyris’s hand, “to you as well, the tattoo on your arm? You worship the great guardian bat as well?”

“You mean Entumbru? The spirit-ancestor of bats and the god of night? Why yes” he said “he goes by many names, that one I have not heard used before”, “Enthrumbu…” Cyris pondered…

Cyris and astarion left Bloodcrystal Vail and headed home, they settled down at Monty’s Chalice to enjoy dinner and sleep before heading out to hunt for Orin.

“Cyris…is it ok if..if we still sleep together?” Astarion softly asked him, Cyris scooted over on the bed, they…didn’t really cuddly like they did before but Cyris did keep Astarion warm. Astarion hated being cold…somehow?

 “How are you cold starry?”, “well, not..not physically…” Astarion laughed “I…feel…I feel less undead when Iam warm”, Cyris rolled over and wrapped him up in his arms.

“It’s getting cold outside…I better keep you nice and snug” he smiled.

[rooklinensinker]

THIS IS BY NO MEANS GOOD

I'm just one of those people that...

*cringe*

write songs to vent about things. I usually forget about them which is kinda sad honestly. But looking at them piled up, I realised "oh damn i have a tumblr and nobody cares if you're cringe on tumblr!" so i decided to post them here if not just to keep them safe somewhere.

Like it or not, I'm kinda proud that I made something.

Sometimes that itself is enough to make me feel better about things.

I've always had trouble with either executive dysfunction or just not being able to balance time. But because work is a duty I couldn't just take my mind off it, even when I did nothing for days on end. I wouldn't do basic chores because I needed to do this first. But I never moved. And then the deadlines would come and I'd panic and break down again. And then I'd work all at once, not eating nor resting until I could finally catch up. I never did. Even when my work was finished it never felt like the race truly was. Even now, years later, I feel the same. It's maddening like you're not truly growing up, if such a thing is even real. Because you keep having the same problems over and over.

Anyways, here's a song about working.

Lyrics:

I hunger no longer cuz the longer I hunger

The more I forget I exist

Something always feels so amiss

Let's not think about this, there's no time

The longer I try to focus, the more my brain just tries to escape

Why am I stuck in this place?

Wish I could send myself into space.

Building my castle of trash with the moths as my witness

Can't think of future or past

Cuz that shit's too serious

I do not know the time or date but I know my deadline's soon

I cannot afford to eat

till I finish this one bit

I may stay awake till I hallucinate

But isn't this just the creative process?

All my friends can do it so I guess

that makes me just that ✨useless✨

I may faint and dissociate

But at least I gotta stay awake

I am working right now

I am working somehow

And it's working working working

Next morning I wake up and it leaves me stunned

My work looks like shit and needs to be redone

That was not in the plan. Fuck!

"What do I care? Let me just sleep!"

...

Sleeping feels so tiring

So is being alive, weeping in the shower

I promised this would be the last time

but I can never keep it.

My nose bleeds and head aches.

I'm aware of all my mistakes.

Procrastination raised the stakes

which is why I keep working working working

I may complain

"Hustle the pain away"

"There's bigger fish in the sea"

That's what I aim to be

But I'm drowning drowning drowning

--------space for a lil mental breakdown------------

Why feed a machine that doesn't work?

So I work to eat, but I can't think anymore

I work till my eyes give up seeing

I work so I forget my own being

Everybody seems like a fucking prodigy

while I'm wasting my time being good ol' mediocre me

If I can't keep up, I'll be left in their dust

----- more mentally ill activity---------

Work is done...

Yay! 🎉

I can take the day off today. ☺️

✨And proceed to do nothing for the next 5 months!👀✨

...

I can't do anything but think I should be working.

"Why have fun, when I should be working?"

"You're gonna die so don't ask why and start working!"

Leave my mark in the market of labour

My only worth is the work you savour

I hope it's worth it so I better get working.

....

Why ain't I working? working working

I have to keep working working working

I can't move but I need to keep working working working

I'll die if I'm not working working working

paralysed from my work, but I need to get working

I'm too tired to work yet I can't forget

that I should be working.

Guess what I should be doing right now 😃✨

[wisemins]

💭, 🎤 , 🎵 and 💃 for your AoT F/Os? :0 (no need to answer for all of them if you don't feel like it tho!!)

TYSM FOR THE ASK ANONNN <333 many kithies for you <3 I'll answer for all of them!! IM SO EXCITED ik i could have split this up, but I want to be annoying w my love rn <3 Thoughts 💭 - What do you think your f/o thinks about you when you’re not around? Armin: Armin I think would just be wondering if I was okay, he worries a lot and his mind tends to get the better of him! But, I also think he'd be doing something productive and is thinking of what he's gonna talk to me about later, maybe something I mentioned to him that he wanted to read up on for me to soothe his nerves. Also probably just being lost in thought about us, definitely some romantical stuff going on in his brain too!! Jean: He's being a simp. Jean can't stand being away from me for too long, he gets nervous like a dog with separation anxiety-- or well, a horse with separation anxiety? He gets very easily irritable in this time, because he also worries, but to everyone else he pretends he's totallyyy not worrying about whether or not I'm somehow in some kind of situation that's not ideal or dangerous. Or he gets insecure if I'm with someone else giving them all the attention I give him, he's a very jealous person. But, if he knows for a fact that I'm safe and sound, he's still being a simp, and he's thinking about me in very simpy way. Erwin: 100% thinking about me coming into his office to convince him to stop working however late he's up in the middle of the night and to come to bed. He plays it over and over in his head until it actually happens, or he's done with his work. He has so much responsibility, but he likes that I bring him away from it when he's overworked since he can't bring himself to do it. It prevents less exhaustion, and I get to actually have my man in my bed at night! Any other time though? He's thinking of what he's going to do for me when I get home, make dinner, maybe buy a spontaneous gift, perhaps write out some romantic letter. He's always looking for ways to surprise me when I'm not around! Yelena: Also being a simp. A huge, flaming, homo. She can't stop thinking about me at any given moment, she just can't! At work? She's thinking about me. Out with her co-workers? She wishes she was at home with me. She has to take a business trip without me? Oh she's gonna die without me around. I won't hear the end of it. She's thinking wholesome things, spicy things, anything to do with me. If she's out shopping and sees something I'd like? No question about it TAKE HER MONEY she's buying it for me. Yelena can't go longer than 24 hours without seeing my face or she goes into withdrawals, she turns feral!

Microphone 🎤 - Does your f/o sing or play music? If so, how are they at their craft, and what’s your favorite thing about it? Armin: Does not sing or play music! He loves listening to it though! Jean: Jean play Bass guitar and electric guitar, he's pretty good at it! He's a pretty decent singer too, but he likes playing more than singing. My favorite thing about it is the confidence he gets, it's so ridiculously attractive and I'm such a loser when he gets like that. Erwin: In my mind, Erwin was 100% a theater kid. His projection voice? Ain't no way he wasn't! I think he can sing very very well, but he just never gets the chance to anymore! But, now that he knows I have the hots for any good vocals, oh, he's singing a lot more. Even if it's just simple stuff while he's in the kitchen, or he's singing along to musicals we watch. He's got a great voice!! No instruments though, I don't think. My favorite thing about this would be him doing those little musical bits while he's cooking dinner or organizing his desk! Yelena: Nope and nope. Maybe she was in band when she was a kid and had to very awkwardly play the clarinet or something, but she's not very musically inclined. She likes to listen to it as well though!

Song 🎵 - What’s a song your f/o knows by heart, and a song you know by heart? Armin: Oh, easy. Line Without A Hook by Ricky Montgomery. He knows it's a generic/popular song but it doesn't stop us BOTH from belting it in the car very poorly because it just goes that hard!! Jean: Tonight by Peter McPoland, absolutely. He LOVES this song and will always sing it any given moment. One song I know by absolute heart no questions asked is Waiting Room by Phoebe Bridgers. You won't ever catch me singing it though!! Erwin: Theater kid incoming again!! Two choices here, maybe three. I Dreamed A Dream from Les Miserables, he loves the steady incline on that song! Also, All I Ask Of You from Phantom Of The Opera! For me, deadass ANYTHING from Sweeney Todd. Most likely Epiphany or A Little Priest! Yelena: I don't know if she does...It's probably some kind of curve ball like the national anthem or the burger king whopper song that annoys the shit out of me, I'm not too sure!! For this one I'll say the Fish McBites jingle, bcus my echolalia won't let that go.

Dance 💃 - Can you or your f/o dance? Armin: Yes! I think Armin is a great dancer! He really like doing it, but he's no professional or anything, he just thinks it's fun! He knows I cannot dance and will refuse to, but I love watching him dance! Jean: ...yes? Yes. He can dance but it's very sloppy, he has great potential though. Always tries to get me to dance but he can never convince me bcus it'd just be embarrassing with both of us OFIUHSAD Erwin: Theater kid. I think he can do some stuff! I will beat this head canon into the ground!! Will insist on ballroom dancing, which he will 100% have to lead and do most of the work for cus I can't dance for the life of me. Yelena: We both can't dance but she refuses to take that as an answer! I have a drawing I did of us doing just that, here! She's super tall and I'm only JUST tall. It's hard to work with but it's silly and fun and cute <3 TYSM FOR THE ASK!! Sorry for dumping so much, a.ot is my weakness and my Ultimate Autism™️

[dontyoufinditstrange]

Infinity On High Lyrics That Alter My Brain Chemistry

Thriller

"i found the safest place to keep all of our mistakes" "long live the car crash hearts" "fix me in forty-five" "i can take your problems away with a nod and a wave of my hand" "the only thing i haven't done yet is die"

"The Take Over, The Break's Over"

"seasons change but people don't" "don't pretend you ever forgot about me" "we don't fight fair" "people will dissect us til this doesn't mean a thing anymore" "we do it in the dark with smiles on our faces"

This Ain't a Scene, Its An Arms Race

"i am an arms dealer, fitting you with weapons in the form of words" "i'm not a shoulder to cry on, but i digress" "the lies i weave are oh so intricate" "i wrote the gospel on giving up"

I'm Like A Lawyer With The Way I'm Always Trying To Get You Off (Me & You)

"last year's wishes are this year's apologies" "i take my last chance to burn a bridge or two" "i only keep myself this sick in the head cause i know how the words get you off" "we're the new face of failure" "prettier and younger but not any better off" "bulletproof loneliness" "collect the bad habits that you couldn't bear to keep out of the woods" "the best way to make it through with hearts and wrists intact is to realize that two out of three ain't bad"

Hum Hallelujah

"you're someone who knows someone who knows someone i once knew" "i could write it better than you ever felt it" "i thought i loved you it was just how you looked in the light" "til tonight do us part" "i'll sing the blues and swallow them too" "one day we'll get nostalgic for disaster" "i love you in the same way there's a chapel in a hospital; one foot in your bedroom, and one foot out the door" "sometimes we take chances, sometimes we take pills"

Golden

"how cruel is the golden rule when the lives we lived are only golden plated?" "i knew that the lights of the city were too heavy for me" "i saw god cry in the reflection of my enemies and all the lovers with no time for me" "tongues on the sockets of electric dreams" "where the sewage of youth drowned the spark of my teens"

Thnks Fr Th Mmrs

"say a prayer but let the good times roll in case god doesn't show" "and i want these words to make things right but its the wrongs that make the words come to life" "one night and one more time"

Don't You Know Who I Think I Am?

"we only want to sing you to sleep" "there's a world outside of my front door that gets off on being down" "i could learn to pity fools as i'm the worst of all" "i can't stop feeling sorry for myself"

The (After) Life Of The Party

"i'm a stitch away from making it and a scar away from falling apart" "put love on hold, young hollywood is on the other line" "singing songs that could only catch the ear of the desperate" "kiss away young thrills and kills on the mouths of all my friends"

The Carpal Tunnel Of Love

"stomp out this disaster town" "we might've started singing just a little soon" "we're throwing stones at a glass moon" "we're so miserable and stunning" "love songs for the genuinely cunning" "dreaming of sinking with the melody of the cliffs of eternity" "got postcards from my former selves saying 'how you been?'" "we might've said goodbye just a little soon" "take two years, and call me when you're better"

Bang The Doldrums

" i couldn't bring myself to call except to call it quits" "best friends, ex-friends til the end" "better off as lovers, not the other way around" "i can't commit to a thing be it heart or hospital" "i cast a spell over the west to make you think of me the same way i think of you" "this is a love song in my own way"

Fame > Infamy

"when i'm home alone i just dance by myself" "the kid was alright but it went to his head" "i'm addicted to the way i feel when i think of you" "there's too much green to feel blue"

You're Crashing But You're No Wave

"everyone's looking for relief" "only breathing with the aid of disbelief" "baby boy can't lift his headached head" "isn't it tragic?" "hang on a rope or bated breath, whichever you prefer" "a bidding war for an old flame's grief" "not a word that could make you comprehend" "unimpressed birds sing and die"

I've Got All This Ringing In My Ears And None On My Fingers

"cause sorrow is all the rage" "i'm so sorry, but not really" "the truth hurts worse than anything i could bring myself to do to you" "do you remember the way i held your hand under the lamppost and ran home this way so many times i could close my eyes?"

[remyfire]

👻🦋

🐬💥

🎁

Fanfic Writer Ask Game

👻 What is your wildest headcanon?

The one that consumed me most recently is that Sidney was a visiting professor at Hawk's medical school in Chicago and they had an entanglement there, which made it very interesting when Hawk caught sight of Sidney driving away from camp after evaluating Klinger—

There is no basis for this at all, which is why I consider it wild. It's just going to be very fun to write in the future.

🦋 Which character is your favorite to write?

BJ BJ BJ BJ BJ BJ. I know he's not everyone's favorite—in fact, for several of my followers, he's their most despised, and I can get why—but I love getting to tap into his skull in a very specific way. There's a degree of kinship there that I don't talk about very much anymore but that makes him impossible for me to shake.

🦈 Which character is the toughest to write?

Hawkeye, you son of a bitch. It's that protagonist syndrome. I've never liked writing the main character of anything because everyone has a very specific way of viewing them, and often they have more fanon widely applied to them than anyone else, so I get stressed if I don't follow exact fanon too. There's always so much to forget about them and so much room for doubt. But I'm trying to figure him out anyway. It helps when I remind myself that my specific iteration doesn't have to match anyone else's and I will still find an audience no matter what.

💥 What is one canon thing that you wish you could change?

I was musing today about how I wish they'd done more with Mulcahy's slow descent into wanting to be a part of the Army's system, craving recognition from them, etc. I would love to see him have to struggle with the incredibly violent history of the Catholic church and recognize that he's becoming one of their weapons in a way that he never intended, but that was probably a bit too much to ask. THAT'S WHAT FANFIC'S FOR!!!

🎁 Have a piece of a WIP you want to share? Here is a snippet from a Trapper/Hawkeye glory hole fic I have percolating, because it's the one closest to being done!

"That's it, sweetheart," Trap breathes, and Hawk's eyelashes flutter as he turns his attention back to the heavy cock bobbing in front of him. "I ain't picky, all right? Whatever you got for me, I'll take it. Today's been a..."

Silence. Hawkeye pushes one hand against the wall for stability, waits. But the longer the quiet stretches out, the grayer his mind becomes. He's not the only one who lost a kid today.

"...well." Trap huffs out a laugh without a bit of amusement in it. "I mean it. Anything."

In that moment, he makes a firm decision. Hawkeye's gonna suck Trapper's brain out through his dick. It's the least the guy deserves, and it's the most Hawkeye can get.

[cat-in-human-form]

I'm struggling super hard with weight and body image

Id be lucky to land body neutral. Hell I'd take less than negative all the time.

All I see is a disastrous nloated ugly monster. Overweight. I hear the cry of bmi (a bunk science) in my head insulting me for being obese. I see photos old and new and want to vomit

I can't work out like I used to. I get winded or migrainey so fast. I finally have enough energy where walking across a room isn't exhausting. Thank god for the b12 shots. But the damage was done from the deficiency.

I miss derby and skating and being strong. But even at my strongest I was fat and ugly. And slow. I never skated fast enough or strong enough or with enough cool moves. I miss skating so much.

I also wish my boyfriend would compliment me. Tell me I'm pretty. He's good at not lying to me. He doesn't go no babe you're the hottest ever. Sometimes I wish he would though. Lie to me a little about being hot. Like he is attracted to me but why. Why babe. I'm not cute. Not even as cute as your other partner. I'm not strong or thin. He's offered to work on losing weight together. We can run or lift or whatever. And I am gonna. But can't you call me hot first. Or at least you ain't a beauty but hey you're alright. Isn't that something he could do this time?

He did call me adorable and cute and smart. He always goes for my brain first. But he also did his usual deflect with a joke like babe you get me hard. And yea sure but like is that all I am? A chubby hole to boff

Idk. I hate getting my pic taken. The mirror is a hell. I struggle to motivate myself to move or get thinner or stronger or anything. The lazy and depressed just fuel the horrible body image. It's despair. It's not motivating. What is even the point right. I'm always gonna be ugly even if I could get strong or slim down.

I'm trapped and I can't get out or gaslight myself into improvement. I can't see my thoughts curiously.

I also just wanna cancel therapy. I don't wanna do it anymore. It's so prohibitively expensive. I don't see progress. I think tomorrows I forgot to cancel is my last session. I just don't wanna do it anymore. It's not helping or feeling worth it. And at the price I can't keep doing it.

[empressofdiamonds]

Do you have any tips on being consistent with a weight loss journey ? I have to loose weight but whenever I start eating healthy I always go back to my old ways.

Honestly what helped me the most is to accept that new mentality:

I'm a person that leads a healthy lifestyle.

I love doing excercises, esp walking, running, and yoga which are my favourite ever activities.

I enjoy being in line with my body.

The old lifestyle is what led you to the weight gain, so it is irrealistic to think the weight loss lifestyle is gonna be a temporary one. You gotta gain a healthy lifestyle that both enables you to lose weight, AND to keep it off.

If you haven't found a sport or a excercise that makes you happy, continue seeking. Pointless to run if you freaking hate running.

For the food, only keep what enables you into that healthy lifestyle. You know keeping 6 bags of chips at home won't help you much, you know a bit of chips at parties or at movies wont hurt much, but you know eating a whole bag a day ain't gonna help you on the long term.

I never keep candies or less great snacks at home. I just keep what I need for my meal-prepping.

Find some recipes that both align with what you WANT and what you LIKE. Per example I freaking love ice cream, it's like my sin. I wish I could eat the super super rich gelato every day so much I love it. What I do instead is keep the gelato treat for when I am with my friends, or family, enjoying my gelato with them. I'm not holed up in my bedroom eating a whole tub of shitty 2$ ice crap watching the 4th season of whatever show. So if I find myself craving intensely ice cream, I make myself some frozen banana ice cream with my mixer, or I throw some frozen blueberries and a bit of yogurt in the mixer.

If I crave a snack, I get myself some popcorn, there's low salt low fat versions of bagged popcorn that help satisfy that craving. I sometimes even make my very own popcorn, by using about 1/4 to 1/8 cup of corn seeds, in a small pot, a little bit of butter at the bottom, I put a lid on top, while it pops I shake the pot until I don't hear anymore popping.

For my main meals, I bulk up my meals with vegetables and good quality proteins, the carbs are like not the majority of my meal. And if I have carbs, I try to get as much whole grains ans fibers as possible. Think multigrain boosted in fiber versus the shitty wonderbread.

Making your own meals is much more efficient both for nutrition and self-control, meaning, I'll make myself just enough for one portion, or maybe two if I'm prepping for another meal, then if I'm "fake hungry" (what this means: I'm hungry for more but I don't wanna eat an apple or some healthy snack), if I wanna eat more I have to go through the effort of making it again. Generally it just turns me off.

Another solution is to prep a huge meal then immediately freeze the remnants in individual dishes. I have to go through the effort of defreezing then microwaving. Berk. I'd rather just eat an apple. Or nothing, because I'm "fake hungry".

See how I constantly outsmart my lazy self 😂

Also! I drink shittons of water!! It helps me being satisfied with my meals. Like think if you soak cereal in milk, it expands. Think the same in the stomach, the water is helping my meal expand and stretch my stomach. The stomach tells the brain "ok we're done, stop eating!".

I let treats be treats. I have fun while excercising. I drink water. This didn't use to be my normal.

[imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl]

I Need You

A/N: This was found on Pinterest, so if you're the owner, let me know so I can give you the credits.

Pairing: Daryl Dixon X Reader

Word count: 2 K

Requested by anons: 1- I'm like super in love with a certain Daryl Dixon and I was wondering if you could write about them getting into a big argument and they like avoid eachother for a while (super angsty if you care lol) and then Carol and Rick just kinda make yall talk and it ends fluffy? 2 - Can i request a daryl x reader where the reader’s been with the group since atlanta, maybe set during when they’re at the prison?? daryl realizes he has a crush on the reader and just p a n i c s ? and just really sweet fluff????

Summary: After you almost get bit, Daryl loses his mind and lashes out on you. Tired of the constant arguments, the group finds a way to out you two together to try and fix things up.

{The Walking Dead Masterlist}

×

“Yer almost got bit!” Daryl shouts, voice echoing through the prison. “Yer too damn stubborn, yer not goin’ on runs anymore.” He has his back at you as you follow him, struggling to keep his pace.

“I had everything under control.” You complain, ignoring Carol's questioning stare.

You, Daryl, and Maggie went on a run earlier today. Not too far, just to get some more formula for Judith. A walker fell from the roof, and it happened to be on a specific place Daryl told you not to go. The thing's teeth got a little too close to your arm, and Daryl shot an arrow through its head.

“Ya sure did!” He stops, turning around and pointing a finger at you. “If I weren't near ya, I'd be carryin’ ya back here with a freakin’ bite.” His voice gets louder, and you never saw Daryl so... Angry. So pissed. He's scaring you. “Or would ya have me cut her damn arm off? How does that sound?”

“Stop yelling at me!” You burst out, giving his chest a push.

“I'll stop yellin’ when ya understand how stupid and dangerous that was!” He steps forward, towering over you and you never felt so small.

“We needed those antibiotics!”

“Well, I freakin’ need ya. I need ya alive! Alive and well and breathin’.” Daryl shouts, right at your face. But the moment the words come out, he stops, stepping back. He seems confused, taken aback by something. “Screw that, I need a break from savin’ yer ass.” And then, he leaves, walking fast.

Huffing, you turn around, going to your cell.

You take the longest shower you can, washing the sweat and all the disgusting things the dead left on your skin. But most of the time, you were already done, dressed, and dried. You just wanted to be away from everyone. But eventually, you have to walk out. And of course, Carol finds you on your way back to your cell.

“(Y/N), I–”

“Daryl is such an asshole.” You say cutting her off and dropping on bed. “Did you see that? Did you see how he yelled at me? As if he has the right to do so.” Getting back up you pace around.

“I just think–”

“You know what? He can go to hell.” Throwing both hands in the air, you complain. “He and his crossbow, and-and his super hot stare and the stupid angel wings vest. And the bike too. All it. Straight to hell!”

“Aren't you just–”

“Uhg! Damn it.” Crossing your arms, you sigh. “Did you hear him forbidding me to go on runs?” With your hands now on your hips, you stare at Carol. “As if! Who the hell does he think he is? My boyfriend? To hell with him.”

“Will you let me talk?”

“Sure, go ahead.” Shrugging your shoulders, you nod.

But she doesn't say anything, she just takes a deep breath and shakes her head lightly. “Look, why don't you calm down first, and then we talk.” Carol gestured at the bed and you sit down, sighing. “Good... Try to relax and deal with it after a good night's sleep.”

“I could sleep a thousand years and I'd still be mad at Daryl.” You mutter as she leaves, lying on your back with your eyes closed.

You don't know where all this anger comes from, but it's always there, waiting to flow out. You do care about him, maybe too much, but it doesn't mean he gets to yell and boss you around like that. “Asshole!” You shout one last time, arms crossing as you drown in anger.

“I saw it,” Daryl exclaims, pacing around the guard tower, breathing and talking fast. “I saw her dyin’. I saw that thing bitin’ her, tearin’ her flesh.”

“She's fine, Daryl. You don't have to keep thinking about it.” Rick tries to calm him down, both hands raised at the archer.

“No, ya don't understand.” It's useless though. Daryl is a mess. He got into the shower as soon as (Y/N) got out, rubbing the walker's blood out of his skin. But after that, he went straight to Rick because he needs to vent. He needs to yell and understand why he feels so damn scared.

Why he feels like a switch was turned on, lighting up something that was there all along, but only now was brought to light.

Losing anyone from his group, from his family would hurt bad.

But he just found out that losing her would be far worse.

“I her dyin’, man.” He slows down, both hands on his head. “I saw her dyin’ and–”

“You love her.”

“What the hell, Rick?” He snaps, a hand violently gesturing at his friend.

“You might not want to admit it, but it's true. You know it.” Rick nods, a hand casually resenting on his holster. “We all know it since Atlanta. She loves you too.”

Daryl grunts, turning his back at Rick. “Yer crazy. And so is she.”

“You should sit and talk like civilized people.”

“I ain't gonna talk to her. Crazy chick.” He mutters, grabbing his crossbow a bit tighter. “She ain't goin’ on runs anymore. At least not without me.”

“Daryl–”

“Gotta go.” The archer cuts him off, leaving the guard tower at a fast pace.

He didn't like the ideas Rick put in his head.

“Rick wants to make a room for Carl and Judith on the second floor,” Carol says as you climb the stairs next to her. “So we're cleaning up the cells.”

“Alright.” You don't really want to help. Not today at least. The nap you took didn't help much with the last issue, and you're considering going out tomorrow, just to clear your head a bit. “What do you need me to do?”

“We're just setting things up.”

“Mmm.” You mutter, running a hand through your hair as you follow her pace. Carol takes you to the very back of the corridor, to a pretty isolated cell. “You gonna put the kids here? This cell sucks. It's too–” You stop talking when you see Daryl inside, eyes-rolling. “Look, I won't help if he helps.” It sounds childish, but you don't care. You're far too pissed at the man to be near him.

“Look, I don't care if you guys argued.” Rick walks over you, friendly touching your arm. “You two just have to get your shkt together.” And you're suddenly pushed, almost stumbling inside the cell.

“What the hell?” You shout, but the moment you move, Rick pulls the bars close locking you inside. “Rick, drop it. I'm not joking.” Holding the bars, you shoot him and Carol an angry stare. “Open up.”

“There are blankets and dinner will be brought to you,” Carol says, arms crossed. “We did that because it's the only way to force you guys to talk.”

“Yeah. You'll have the whole night to figure out whatever has you both always at each other's throat.” Rick adds, sliding the key into his pocket. “Have a nice time.”

And like that, both jerks leave, talking something you can't hear. Sighing, you lay your forehead on the cold metal bars, not wanting to look at your company for the night.

“Yer can take the bed.” He says after a while.

“Obviously.” You're quick to snap. “It's your fault we're here in the first place.”

“How's that?”

“If you didn't come back from the run making a hell of a show about something that didn't even happen, we wouldn't be locked up in here.” Turning around, with both hands on your hips, you stare at him.

“If ya had listened to me, ya wouldn't have–”

“And why in the hell do I have to listen to you, Dixon? I know my way out there as well as you do.”

“ ‘Cause I jus’ wanna keep ya safe.” He's yelling again, stepping forward.

“Stop acting like I mean anything to you!” With a finger on his face, you move closer to him. You wish you could look intimidating, but being so small, that's very difficult.

“Maybe ya do mean somethin’ ta’ me! How could ya know that if ya never ask!”

“Well, I–” The answer is cut short when your furious brain processes what he just said. Furrowing your eyebrows together, you shrug your shoulders. “What do you mean?”

“Nothin’.”

“Daryl, what do you mean?” Raising your voice again, you follow him as he moves further into the cell. “What would you answer if I ask?”

“I ain't gonna answer.”

“Daryl–”

“I ain't gonna answer!” He shouts again, turning around to look at you.

Taking a deep breath, you sit on the edge of the bed, folding a leg under you. “Do you hate me?”

“What?”

“Do you hate me, Daryl?” Your voice is lower now because you do want to know.

He remains silent for a while, those blue eyes locked on yours. “No.”

“Then why–”

“I can't lose ya.” He bursts out, eyes now looking at the floor. “At that moment back there, I... I saw it happenin’. I saw ya dyin’, and I... I can't lose ya. I can't see ya gettin’ hurt.”

His voice is so low you can barely hear it. You've never seen Daryl so... Scared. Vulnerable. “You can't protect me all the time, Daryl. Accidents happen.”

“I can. I can keep ya safe if ya listen to me.” You're about to protest when Daryl comes to sit next to you, eyes on the wall across the cell. “I know ya can survive out there. But my mind works in a thousand different ways ta’ get stuff done without anyone gettin’ hurt. I need ya ta’ trust me. Ta’ believe I can keep ya safe.”

“But I need you to believe me too. To believe I can do this.” Turning your body towards him, you friendly touches his arm. “Daryl, I... I like you... A lot. And I admire you, I trust you. You taught me so much and I need you to trust me. I promise I'll be more careful, but I need you to–”

“Don't go out there without me.” He suddenly says, voice heavy. “I trust ya. Yer brave and strong. But if ya go out there and I can't keep my eyes on ya... I'll lose my damn mind.”

“Alright.” Nodding, you sigh, smiling a little. “Just don't yell at me again, Daryl Dixon.”

“Yer almost died and I... Damn it, (Y/N), –”

“I like you too, Dixon.” Standing up to your feet, you smile, looking down at him. “You don't have to say if you don't want to, just... Let's get this over with. The world is a freaking mess and if you like me and I like you we should be together.” You can't believe you're saying this, after so long. But it feels good. You feel good, secure. “Just let me know what you want.”

“Ya.”

“Me?”

“Yeah.” He nods, blue eyes locked on yours.

“Alright.” Mirroring his head movement, you clear your throat, cheeks burning. After a few seconds of silence, you walk to the bars. “RICK! CAROL! Daryl and I are dating now, can we go?” You yell, and the low chattering downstairs goes silent.

“Would it be so bad ta' stay locked in here with me for a night?” Daryl asks, and you turn around, biting your lip to hold back a smile.

“Absolutely not.” Shrugging your shoulders, you slowly move to the bed, climbing on and lying down. “I'm actually sleepy and it's cold so it'll be nice to have someone to warm me up at night.”

“Don't push it.”

“I'm not.” Giggling, you feel as he lies down, close enough so his shoulder is touching your back. “Night, D. It was good to sort things out with you.”

“Good night, pretty girl.” He mutters and you smile, eyes closing and sleep easily overcoming you, thanks to the amazing feeling of having Daryl lying next to you.

[chaiscentedcandle]

Like You (George Weasley x fem!reader)

𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: George Weasley

𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: Y/n can’t find anybody else like George

𝐑𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭: none

𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: lil angsty, cursing, mentions of food, gets happy towards the end!

𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 2,461

𝐀𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: this is inspired by my all time freaking favorite Doja Catsong, Streets, omg I love it, I also had a different idea for this song but as I was writing it just took a turn so I might write another one but it’ll be different, but anyways if you guys haven’t listened to Streets you should omgggg but you don’t have too!! Anyways I hope you guys like it!💗💗 I ONLY USED KATIE BELL AS DRAMA NO KATIE BELL SLANDER🤚🏼

Like you, like you

Like you, ooh

I found it hard to find someone like you

To say Y/n love life was sad was kinda far behind it, sure he’s dated boys in the past before, but the feelings never stayed. She dated boys and not men because back then her judgement never got the best of her. She did feel bad that after only a few weeks of dating she questioned her feelings, they’d gone so soon but why?

Like you, like you

Send your location come through

I can’t sleep no more

In my head we belong

Y/n always felt like she was doing something wrong when she broke up with them, it wasn’t their fault she lost feelings she just....did. Dating is hard, it’s very hard and no one will tell you that, all these other people make it look easy and fun but it’s just the exact opposite.

And I can’t be without you

Why can’t I find no one like you?

I can’t sleep no more

In my head we belong

Maybe dating was hard because your soul knew the person your with is not the person you want to be with. Maybe it’s hard because deep down you know you won’t have a future with said person and it feels like waisted time. Maybe datings hard because the person you want to be with is with someone else.

These thoughts plagued Y/n and George at night. In each other’s head they belonged together.

And I can’t be without you

Why can’t I find no one like you?

Baby, we tried to fight it

We all been there some days

Sometimes it’s not just hard for one party, sometimes it’s hard for the other party as well. Because George has been in love with Y/n for as long as he could remember, his best friend, and it didn’t feel weird to be in love with her, he tried to push his feelings down, so far down that he couldn’t feel them, yet the feelings are too strong.

Thought I need something else

And acted like I was okay

We just had to work it out

And baby, I needed space

George thought maybe if he dated someone else things would be okay instead of acting like it was okay. He needed to work things out, he gave himself space from Y/n which not only left her confused but Fred as well, he tells everything to Fred so why is he distancing himself from her?.

So when he started dating Katie Bell, it didn’t feel right. Something in his gut told him it wasn’t right and he shouldn’t be doing it, but how could he tell his best friend he’s in love with her? She probably wasn’t even in love with him, he wasn’t even Katie’s first choice.

Ain't nobody 'round here wrong

You love all yours so far away

You're pouring your heart out

I'm acting like I knew

George and Katie’s relationship didn’t last long, he refused to kiss her and only wanted to hold her hand, anytime she’d try to find way to kiss him he’d make a silly excuse to slip away. After a few months they finally split, he couldn’t deny how he felt towards Y/n anymore, he’s been denying it too long.

Late at night he would create scenarios where he poured his heart out to Y/n and she acted like she knew already, his words were moving and he didn’t stumble over his words and they’d share a fiery kiss. Every night he wished something like that would happen.

You held me so down

So down I never grew, oh

I tried to find out

When none of them came through

Before George could confess his feelings for Y/n she also dated someone for a span of months, Adrian Pucey. Adrian Pucey was well known around the school, being on the Slytherin quidditch team had its perks, but Y/n never knew why he was well known for it, other people had been on the quidditch team.

Adrian Pucey put Y/n in a corner when he asked her to be his girlfriend in front of everyone at the great hall, Y/n was speechless for a moment, of course it had to be in front of everyone, if she said no she’d be seen as a heartless bitch. Y/n convinced herself that maybe since George had dated someone else she should too.

Their relationship lasted shorter then George and Katie’s. Adrian had no idea what to do with a relationship nor how to treat a women, he was cold and mean to Y/n, he always backed her into a corner and called her names when she didn’t agree with him, so in a flurry of emotions she broke up with him in front of a decent sized group of people. She felt like he had held her down, she’s a delicate flower who’s trying to blossom into a beautiful hibiscus but Adrian was a slug who was holding her down from growing.

And now I'm stuck in the middle

And baby had to pull me out, oh

Like you, like you

Like you, ooh

George was beyond aggravated when Adrian had asked Y/n out, his Y/n, Fred tried to talk to him later that day in the common room. “Y/n is her own person and can date whoever she wants” Fred told him, “yeah, but it’s angering too see her with some prat as Adrian Pucey”. Ron had butted into the conversation to joke and say that the twins roles had been reversed and one was acting like the other, alas he was told to shut up.

Before Y/n had broken up with Adrian he tried to figure out all the things wrong Adrian was doing, he could’ve made a bullet point list of a few pages from the things he picked up on. He brought them all to Y/n’s attention, she didn’t deny them because, well, she already knew. She had no idea why she was with him. She was more than grateful that George had helped pull her out from the middle.

I found it hard to find someone like you

Like you, like you

Send your location, come through (Yeah)

Damn papa, you a rare breed, no comparing

Now that they are both single George thought it would be a great time to tell Y/n how he feels, but it’s harder done than said. Anytime he’d find a lull in a conversation or comfortable silence he could feel his heart wanting to tell her, wearing to tell her but his mouth just wouldn’t move and his brain just wouldn’t function.

Y/n also wanted to tell George how she felt for so long but could never come to either, whenever they’d be apart from each other she’d have other students or friends come find her then tell her George was looking for her, he’s always looking for her. Y/n thought most of the guys at Hogwarts were just like Adrian, but when she left Adrian she realized there was many guys way different then Adrian, like George, he wasn’t like anyone she’s really seen and it took her this long to realize how rare he is.

And it's motherfuckin' scary

Tryna keep him 'cause I found him

Let a hoe know, I ain't motherfuckin' sharing

I could take you to the parents, then to Paris

Rumors began to spread that Katie was wanting George back, people said she was very sulky and quiet. Her friends said all she brought up was George and how annoying it was getting. “She spends most of her time talking about George, she’s had a few nights where all she talked about was him, it’s quite annoying actually” recalled one of her friends.

This made Y/n jealous. She tried to not get jealous but George had said he was done with Katie. Her mother always told her jealousy is bad medicine. Y/n couldn’t help the way she felt, she knows not to surprise feelings so she embraced it instead, she was jealous and she had a right to be. She waited this long, she didn’t want to share.

You the type I wanna marry (Yeah) and keep you merry

I'll put the ring on when you ready

We play our fantasies out in real life ways and

Y/n’s friend group who consisted of George, Fred, Lee, and Angelina had been talking about the situation in the Gryffindor common room, Y/n was slumped in a arm chair with her arms and legs crossed. She wasn’t pleased to hear the situation again, the students at Hogwarts grabbed onto any drama like a leech. “Are you okay, Y/n?” Angelina asked her, giving a glance to her then to the fire “I’m fine” she mumbled

No Final Fantasy, can we end these games though?

You give me energy, make me feel lightweight

Like the birds of a feather, baby

We real life made for each other

The drama started to disperse, people started to find other things to talk about. Y/n finally felt like she could breathe and she didn’t have to hear someone mumbling about Katie and George. Of course it couldn’t last forever, at lunch everyone chatted about something in the Great Hall. Katie and her friends sat more towards the front of the table while Y/n and her friends sat more towards the middle, Y/n noticed how Katie couldn’t keep her eyes from wandering. Soon Fred picked up on what was happening.

“Oi! George! Looks like a certain someone can’t take her eyes off you” as soon as it passed Fred’s lips, Y/n had tightly gripped a piece of bread she had been eating, crunching sound from the crust and crumps falling to her plate. George nudged her “are you alright?” He asked,Y/n didn’t even look up “I’m fine, do I not look fine?” She snapped. George hadn’t said another word.

Y/n felt like she was stuck in a game she’s meant to lose. To her luck, Katie came wondering over to their part of the table, you could tell she was nervous and she was playing with her fingers. She stopped in front of George “u-uhm, George?” She said quietly, almost to quiet. George looked up from his plate, meeting her eyes “yes?” He said confused. Katie played with her fingers more “i....I just wanted to say that, uhm....I miss you, quite a bit actually” she tucked her hair behind her ear and casted her gaze to the floor “and I was wondering if we could possibly....try again?” George was speechless, and shocked, sure Katie is a nice girl but she’s not his, not when his flower is sitting next to him, clearly seething. However, George didn’t want to embarrass her by saying no, he didn’t want to embarrass her like that. “Uhm...I’ll-I’ll think about it” Katie gave a silent “okay!” With a smile and walked back to her spot, a slight skip in her step.

This only aggravated Y/n more, why couldn’t George be the one to give her so much energy from just a single glance that made her head spin, why wouldn’t he make Y/n feel weightless. Why couldn’t they be birds of a feather?, maybe thinking they were made for each other didn’t really mean they were.

And it's hard to keep my cool

When other bitches tryna get with my dude and

When other chickens tryna get in my coop

'Cause you're a one in a million

There ain’t no man like you

Y/n didn’t want to cause a scene but it didn’t take a fool to notice how affected she was by what Katie had done, especially George’s response. Grabbing her bag, she stood up from her seat hastily and speed walked out of the Great Hall. Her cold and hard stare could send shivers down your spine, she looked like she was ready to exploded any second.

Maybe it was just her head telling her that George was hers, they hadn’t really talked about it for that matter. George had watched her leave the Great Hall, he kept his eyes in the direction she left still, his lips pressed into a fine line, his brain was running around with what he should do. He didn’t move until Hermione said something “well, what are you doing? Go after her!” He didn’t give it a second thought and was out the door.

It wasn’t long before George found Y/n at a spot over looking the Great Lake. Her elbow rested on a ledge with her chin in her hand, she looked a little more calm. George stood next to her, Y/n glanced at him then back to the lake. “What’s wrong?” George said, Y/n gave him another quick glance before she spoke “I thought you said you were done with Katie Bell” she had nothing against Katie, not really, she was just jealous. “I am” George said, Y/n rolled her eyes “didn’t look like it” she replied. Y/n didn’t want to hear it anymore, she turned on her heel to leave but only making a few steps before George grabbed her arms and turned her towards him “I don’t love her!” George said defensively “why are you so jealous anyways?” Y/n scoffed, she wasn’t going to admit she was jealous “I’m not jealous” she mumbled “yes, you are! Why are you jealous?” He repeated “because you’re one in a million! There’s no man like you! I want you for myself” Y/n spoke before she could think.

Like you, like you

Like you, ooh

I found it hard to find someone like you

Like you, like you

Y/n and George couldn’t believe what she had said, George often doubted himself but to hear that from someone he loves. It was refreshing. “I don’t love her” George said again “I love you” the tension was so thick you could cut it with a butcher knife. One was waiting for the other to do something. Y/n’s hands had been shaking a little, George was playing with his pointer finger and staring at his shoes, it was so unreal to them that they both were dumb enough to not see they both fancied each other.

Slowly Y/n took a few steps forward, she wrapped her arms around George’s neck and pulled him in. He buried his face in her neck “it was hard to find someone like you, and I don’t want to let you go” Y/n whispered “I don’t want to let you go either” George added. They both pulled away to look at each other, looking each other in the eyes to find something. George placed a soft kiss on Y/n’s forehead then placed his on hers. Finally they got to have each other.