#natalie x leliana

[artsybeccaartblog]

Been working on this for most of the day! Every one of my current DA pairings being lovey cuties. Happy Valentine’s Day!

From left to right:

Natalie x Leliana

Aeryn x Zevran

June x Blackwall

Aurora x Cullen

Avarielle x Alistair

Adrianna x Sera

Leah x Fenris

[artsybecca]

Been working on this for most of the day! Every one of my current DA pairings being lovey cuties. Happy Valentine’s Day!

From left to right:

Natalie x Leliana

Aeryn x Zevran

June x Blackwall

Aurora x Cullen

Avarielle x Alistair

Adrianna x Sera

Leah x Fenris

[randomnotebookstories]

Nightmare - Cullen x F!Trevelyan

Hey, all. I’m back to re-posting and editing my stories. Now that my tattoo has healed enough that I can lay it on my keyboard comfortably. Anyway, remember you can skip ahead and read all the rest of my Cullen x Trevelyan work on my AO3 here. Have a great week, everyone!!  Thanks so much for the love so far.

---

The night sky was blanketed with heavy clouds as snow began to lightly fall from the sky. All of Skyhold was quietly asleep, having just begun their rest as they prepared for whatever the Maker had next instore for them. It was the well-deserved moment of quiet they needed before the Inquisition was to make its trek to Orlais and the Winter Palace in the morning.

But shouts of urgency soon started to spread throughout the keep as candles and torches were lit. Cassandra, in full armor and hand on the hilt of her sword, was marching out of the main hall, addressing the soldiers that began to gather below her. 

“Find the Inquisitor!” she commanded, trying to keep her voice strong, even though she was worried and trying to keep a stern expression. “Check all the halls, any signs of entry into Skyhold. Prepare for the worst!”

Natalie had gone missing at some point during the night, and it was only noticed when Josephine went into her quarters to leave a report on the Inquisitor’s desk to read in the mornin. But she found that the room in complete disarray. Papers were thrown off of the desk, the fabric on one side of the canopy bed was torn off, and half of Natalie’s collection of daggers - usually kept in a very organized jeweled box - were embedded into the wall next to the fireplace. From there, Josephine went to waking Leliana, Cassandra, and Cullen, and soon everyone in the keep knew she was missing.

The entire keep was abuzz as soldiers and the Inquisitor’s companions rushed about the keep, trying to find the missing woman. Cullen had tried to keep himself firm and orderly, ever the presence of a commanding force, but he had worry tugging at his heart as memories of stolen kisses and quick glances came flooding to his mind. He had to find her. To hold her and know she was safe.

But as an hour passed and then two, there was still no sign of the Inquisitor. Cullen had begun to have thoughts of doubt as he entered the garden, heading toward the small chapel and the shrine of Andraste. He needed a moment to clear his mind and find guidance. 

Anyone could have missed it, the small blanket tucked just behind the shrine of Andraste, especially with the room being as dark as the night outside. And the whisper that was so quiet that even Cullen wasn’t sure if it came from a voice or the wind.

The whisper became clearer as he stood in the silence, and this time Cullen could make out what it said. “Alex.” Taking slow, delicate steps toward the statue, he bent down to his knees and released a breath he had held for what seemed as a lifetime.

There in the dust on the cold floor, Natalie was curled up into a tight ball, clutching her knees to her chest a she shivered under the thin blanket. Her hair was loose, but tangled in a mess of knots at the back of her head. And she kept whispering in her restless sleep, her eyes pinched tightly together. “Alex.”

“Natalie,” Cullen whispered as he removed his gloves and placed a hand gently to her arm, waking her enough that she gently opened her eyes and looked at him. “Are you alright?”

Her red, bloodshot eyes locked with Cullen’s for a moment before all that happened that night crept back up in her mind. She sat up, slowly, the blanket falling to her waist. She had only on a light shirt on that left her arms bare and trousers that matched, stopping just above her knees. Cullen reached to bring the blanket back up over her shoulders, using a slow and gentle motion as though Natalie was a spooked horse. “I had a nightmare.”

“Your room looks as though you were attacked by a nightmare,” he commented, bringing a hand through her hair to get it to lay flat, but more so that he could make sure that Natalie was really there with him. 

A single tear began to roll down Natalie’s cheek, and she tore her gaze away from Cullen and back to the statue of Andraste. “I know,” she whispered, her voice catching. “I had to get the thoughts out of my mind somehow. I felt trapped.”

“Would you like to tell me?” he asked, watching as Natalie slowly crumbled back in on herself. It broke his heart to watch the woman he respected – and, dare he admit it, loved and admired – fall apart in front of him. Even if he couldn’t save himself from his own dreams, he felt like he needed to be able to protect her from her own.

Natalie took a weak breath, but nodded her head as her hand clutched to the pendant on her neck. “I told you of my younger brother, being in the Circle at Ostwick – Alexander. He was at the conclave, and was the last thing I remembered seeing before I got my memories back.”

Her breath caught again, but Cullen knew what she was thinking. That her brother had died at the conclave and that she blamed herself. “When I went to close the rift that first day with Cassandra… A body at the Temple still lay in front of it.” Natalie’s knuckles were white as she tightly gripped her pendant. “I could tell it was him because he still wore our family’s mark around his neck.”

Tears freely flowed down Natalie’s cheeks, and Cullen wrapped her in his arms, silently thanking he hadn’t worn his armor as she pulled herself to his chest. “He’s gone,” she cried, clenching her hands into Cullen’s shirt. “I should have protected him, but I couldn’t.”

The door to the chapel opened, and a messenger stood in the doorway unsure whether or not he should approach. “I have her,” Cullen called over his shoulder before he placed his lips to the top of Natalie’s head, breathing in the scent of her hair that always managed to smell of lilies. “I have you.”

Natalie’s body began to shake as sobs took control of her. Her hands clutched to the dampened fabric of Cullen’s shirt, holding him like he was the only thing keeping her above the flood; the only thing real in a sea of dreams. And all the while, Cullen just rested his lips on the top of her head, stroking one hand along her back while the other held her tightly to him.

When her breathing finally began to slow and become more regular, Cullen was sure she had fallen asleep. But her one hand began to run along his chest, and he glanced down to see that Natalie was watching as she traced the wrinkles in his shirt with the tips of her fingers. “Do I have to go to Orlais?” she whispered, her voice barely stronger than a croak.

It was unthinkable a moment before, but Cullen did chuckle a little as he bent to gently kiss one of the stars by her eye. “If it were up to me, I would see to it that you had all the time that you needed grieve. But the Inquisition needs its Inquisitor.”

She nodded her head in recognition, but still asked, “Is there someone else who wants to have the job?”

“If anyone deserves to defeat Corypheus and be called ‘Inquisitor,” Cullen started as he shifted so he could lift Natalie into his arms and stand, “then I can’t think of anyone that is more deserving of that victory than you.”

The Commander carried the Inquisitor out of the garden, through the main hall, where many of those who were a part of the search and Natalie’s companions finally let out a sigh of relief when they entered. He brought Natalie up the many stairs to her private quarters, where everything had been organized and replaced. The bed had been freshly made with clean sheets, and while one side of the canopy still was missing a curtain, the blankets had been pulled back so all that Natalie had to do was lay down.

Cullen placed her gently onto the bed, and pulled the blankets over her legs. But when he went to place a kiss upon her lips, he caught himself at the sight of her finally sleeping peacefully. Even for a kiss, he couldn’t imagine waking her, so he doused the few lit candles in the room, made sure that the fire was burning properly, and then quietly left Natalie to sleep. The Maker knew he wouldn’t find any rest tonight.

When he finally entered into the main hall again, many of the people had returned to their own quarters, but Liliana and Josephine stood in his way. “The Inquisitor is asleep,” Cullen stated as he tried to get around them. “May I ask why the two of you are not letting me pass?”

The two women shared a glance before Liliana looked at him with one of her many mischievous grins. “I wonder… Do you know how to dance, Commander?”

[liaragaming]

Keeping in touch.

Inktober, Day 6. Leliana x f!Tabris @ellstersmash

Word count: 556.

Cassandra would kill her if she knew she'd always been in contact with the Hero of Ferelden. But like Varric, she was protecting the one she loved.

She sends love letters, stamped with the usual Inquisition seal. She scents the paper with perfume or wine, hoping the smell will last.

She receives love letters, sealed but without insignia, and unfurls them to find her love's dirty fingerprints at the edges of the parchment.

She sends her next letter with an imprint of her lips.  

Her love sends back the same, and she traces her fingertips over those perfect shapes.

She wonders how her love managed it out on the road. Surely there was no lipstick to be found. Perhaps flower petals ground into a paste? Any smell has dissipated, so she can't be sure.

She locks her love's letters in a chest – butterflies captured in a jar. And from time to time, she takes them out and reads them again and daydreams about happier times.

But letters, however dear, cannot substitute for flesh and blood or her love's tender voice. There are things she did in the name of the Divine, things she does in the name of the Inquisition. Dark things. Things that take a toll, that shift her nature, that make her someone she does not want to be.

Her love's letters become painful, reminders of a part of herself she hasn't seen in a long while, of a beautiful future she isn't sure exists for her anymore. Eventually, she stops opening the chest. She leaves the words of her love – the laughter, the joy, and the butterflies – locked away where they hurt less.

She has no one to turn to. She is the Inquisition's Spymaster, and the ruthlessness required to do the job well does not come from love or compassion. It's better to distance her from everyone and everything. It's not what she wants, but it makes things easier.

The Inquisitor's prodding and their insistence that she can aim higher annoys her. When Butler betrays her, when she fails to discover the danger at Haven, when she holds her knife to Natalie's throat – she knows what she has to do. But it is the Inquisitor who always pulls her back, who tells her she doesn't have to sacrifice her morals or her people to do what must be done.

She can do more, be more, and still do her job well.

It's difficult for her to listen, even more impossible for her to believe. But she is the Inquisition's agent, and as with the Divine she follows the orders she's given.

And as before, it’s those orders that shape her, that slowly shift her back to center. For the first time in a long time, she finds the part of herself she thought she'd lost. And when the Inquisitor shows her a letter in her love's handwriting that was never meant for her eyes, she bursts into tears.

I beg you, if she is faltering, help her find her way back into the light.  

She takes the letter and kisses that beautiful sentence. With the Inquisitor's permission, she adds the letter to her chest. Throughout the long days, weeks, and months, she keeps that letter on top to remind herself.

Her love has been with her all this time and still is.

Read all prompt stories: [AO3] [Tumblr]

Still accepting prompts.

[randomnotebookstories]

Panic Attacks - CullenXf!Trevelyan

Hey, guys! I’m reposting all my old stories (with some editing) from my original Tumblr that I have saved on AO3. If you want to check them all out instead of waiting, click here to read my Cullen-x-Trevelyan series. Otherwise, thanks ahead for reading Panic Attacks, and enjoy!!

---

Natalie Trevelyan stormed across the ramparts of Skyhold, her hands raking through the waves of her light brown hair while her grey eyes flickered back and forth, scanning the ground in front of her as she walked. In the weeks that the Inquisition has taken up home at the old keep, she had been rushed into extra meetings on top of the trips across that sent her across Thedas, trying to find a way to stop Corypheus, she was sure her mind was about to explode. Or possibly implode. She needed just a single moment of peace and quiet, to get away from the noises of planning battles and staking favors. And, now, they were faced with planning an attack on Adamant, a fortress in the middle of the desert.

In all her years of training in dual wielding of daggers, the years she spent pouring over books in her father’s study and learning about different battles, the time she spent preparing herself to join the Chantry at her parents request… Nothing prepared Natalie to be able to make decisions for a whole group of people, let alone the entirety of Thedas.

Resting her arms against the cool stones of the wall and looking out into the distance, Natalie’s shoulder-length hair fell in front of her face, then billowed out behind her as the breeze caught the soft locks as it drove its force past her. “How can I do this?” she whispered to no one, her voice so low that she could barely hear it over the howling of the wind.

“Inquisitor?”

There it was. The title that she didn’t believe she deserved, nor even necessarily earned. The title that she didn’t have the experience for. And yet, they placed all of the responsibility on her, they trusted her, and she could barely trust herself.

“Inquisitor? Are you alright?”

Natalie straightened her back and locked her eyes with those of the Commander of their army. Cullen’s face was full of worry, no doubt coming to make sure she was alright after storming out of the War Room when her three advisors argued about some details, pushing her over the edge of doubt. The three experienced people who Natalie drew strength from, and they couldn't agree on who to send where.

She should have told him she was fine, keeping the appearance of a strong authority figure. But when she opened her mouth, the truth overpowered the lie that was on the tip of her lips. “Honestly, no. I’ve no training for leading an army, like you or Cassandra. No experience on negotiating with nobility, like Josephine. I can’t even imagine being able to do whatever it is Leliana does to get information. And yet, somehow, you’ve all decided that I can lead us because my hand glows and I fell from the sky.”

Cullen leaned against the wall ,and just let Natalie continue her rant, never taking his eyes off of her for a moment, giving his full attention. “And, worst of it, I have to be the one between all of you and pick a side. I barely know which way the sun is supposed to rise lately, but I’m supposed to be able to stop Grey Wardens, and rouge mages, and Corypheus, all with the power bestowed upon me that I’m not even sure Andraste had anything to do with, because certainly She would have given the power to someone with a little more experience, and-”

Natalie began to breathe heavily, her hands pushing her hair to her face as she slid her back down the side of the wall to sit on the stone walkway. Her eyes began to flicker, seeing nothing as her mind began to panic. Her knees buckled and twitched as though ready to run at any moment. Too many thoughts ran through her mind: too young, too inexperienced, too naïve.

Her mind surely would have burst if suddenly a warm pair of hands hadn’t gently pulled hers from her head as Cullen knelt down in front of her. “Look at me, and breathe,” he instructed, and Natalie fought to focus her eyes on his.

When their eyes finally met, she watched as Cullen exaggerated taking slow, deep breaths, and Natalie found herself mimicking the process until the wild thoughts in her mind slowed to almost a whisper. Nothing in her mind existed aside from the feeling of Cullen’s leather gloves in her hands, the warm look of his eyes as they gently melted away the fears, and the tense muscles faded away as her breathing slowed.

“Better?” Cullen asked as he drew a thumb over the top of her hand, slowly relaxing the muscles in her fingers.

Slowly, she nodded. “I don’t know what that was about,” she whispered, her voice stiff as her throat tried to relax. “I’ve never felt like that before.”

“Your mind panics even though there isn’t anything present to fear,” Cullen explained as he finally let his gaze fall for a moment before bringing it back to her. “Sometimes, you may start to feel as though the weight of everything and nothing is pressing into you. Other times, just the added stress of one situation will send your mind into panic. But it does end. You just need to find a way to remind yourself to breathe.”

Everything he said spoke true to Natalie, and she straightened one of her legs out as the tension in her knee gave way. “You’ve felt like this before?” she asked, and when his gaze fell from hers, she understood. “It’s something to do with what happened in Ferelden, right?” Cullen had begun to talk about what happened to him, why he hadn’t trusted the mages, but he didn’t tell her much more than that. And, in a way, she understood. Someone so young, so inexperienced. Someone who was at the same point in his life that Natalie now faced.

“If you ever feel like you need to escape your thoughts again, whether we’re in the War Room or the training ground,” Cullen said, his tone low and serious as he brought his gaze back up to her, “just look to me. I’ll understand.

“And as for feeling like you’re inexperienced in dealing with this,” Cullen continued as he stood, then helped Natalie to her feet. “We all are. But whatever experience we have, it’s yours. Years of experience at your hands, just like those books that I’ve seen you sneaking away from Dorian.”

Natalie smiled and took her hands back from the Commander’s, pushing her hair out of her face and tucking them behind her ears. “Thank you,” she smiled, her gaze meeting Cullen’s for just a moment before she sighed heavily. “Alright. One step at a time, starting with the Grey Wardens and Adamant.”