#nearly a year later lol

[grollow]

PINNED POST

Hi, I'm Rhysa.

You may have known me as Ashe, which I still answer to.

And this is a multi-fandom blog where I sometimes share my own original content (usually writing). I am autistic, queer, nonbinary (they/them only, please) and opinionated. I'm also an adult. This blog is primarily SFW, but there may be some suggestive posts. If you are a minor, please consider that before following me (I won't take offense, promise). There won't be anything blatant, but I do reblog kink-positive things.

Primary Fandoms

Hollow Knight

FromSoft titles (especially Bloodborne and Dark Souls III, but sometimes Elden Ring and the other Dark Souls titles)

Ender Lilies

Final Fantasy XIV: Endwalker (there will be spoilers here)

I am a horror fan so you may also see random horror-related things or strangely passionate outbursts about vampires in fiction. I will not apologize. 

Mentioning Bloodborne to me is literally always a trap, I will become the most annoying person you know if you ask me about the Moon Presence.

I literally never shut up about Grimm from Hollow Knight.

Spare Me And You The Trouble

I am not here to get into shipping arguments with you or anyone else. If you REALLY want my opinions, you can send me asks off-anonymous and I'll answer you candidly in private. I am not interested in discourse of this nature (I am too old and tired please).

Also, if you are thinking about sending me some ask complaining that I ship Grollow, save us both the trouble and don't. I'm probably going to not answer.

But if you want to know why, I wrote a long answer here.

Writing Tags

My main tag for writing is #ashe writes. You can find my more popular fics under #w&g, #red sky, #do not go gently, #ld, and #butterfly effect. Other stuff is probably randomly tagged because I am very bad at remembering the tagging system. Sorry.

Find Me Elsewhere?

I’m on Ao3 as Rhysa or Shyra and Twitter as ashyronfire.

My writing blog is @ashyronfire if you are only here for that. ❤

Other Stuff

Asks are always open and I’m a chatty weirdo usually, so feel free to send anything you feel like that isn’t drama-related. If I am open for prompts, I will usually post something. Otherwise, you can probably assume that I am not (sorry).

Deepest apologies to the people who follow me hoping for regular FromSoft stuff but are just subjected to the constant bug train; it will continue to happen.

pfp by @viapencil

banner by @amywolfhardt

Wanna help a starving writer? (PS: I’m not starving.)

I have a ko-fi if you’re feeling generous and would like to donate or you can donate to my cashapp $ashyronfire if you like. I also take commissions for writing. More info here. (Currently Closed)

❤

[mynameismad]

THE RUMORS ARE TRUE! 

I am fresh off of drawing an entire graphic novel (which will be out in stores Feb 2024 oh boy!) and about to start Kickstarter fulfillment for my other (18+) comic, and NOW I FINALLY CAN GET BACK TO SAKANA. It has been a long few years for everyone. :U

Right now I'm focusing on building a buffer of pages before I decide on an official relaunch date, but there are NEW ACTUAL PAGES IN EXISTENCE AS WE SPEAK. I thought it would be hard to jump back in but turns out when you've done something 600 times already the BODY REMEMBERS.

I don't have a set goal for buffer pages other than "A LOT OF THEM" but I'll be posting them to the $5 tier of my Patreon until I decide on a public relaunch date (hopefully mid summer?) There's already 3 whole real pages up there. Unbelievable.

Anyhoo, thanks to everyone who's been waiting patiently for Jiro Sakana to get his ass in gear!! A whole pandemic has happened (is happening!) since the last update oh my god.

It's good to be back!

You can check out my Patreon here if you're so inclined: https://www.patreon.com/mynameismad

But regular public updates WILL RESUME sometime this summer (if everything goes according to plan) so you'll get to see the pages one way or another!

[softerhaze]

idk if it was the venus retrograde or what, but july 2023 was quite literally the worst month i've ever experienced in my life like.....every single day? awful? worse than the last? it's more likely than u think

[sysig]

Care for your sparring partner (Patreon)

Bonus:

[faehrnem]

In a different timeline, where Faehrnem never comes to be as the Bold Tree follows in his older sister's footsteps by setting aside his own wants and dreams to instead begrudgingly take on his role as an avatar.

[crusheswhimsandfancies]

[daddy-long-legssss]

The Story Behind The Song: Arctic Monkeys’ early ambitions on ‘A Certain Romance’

Lucy Harbron – Far Out Magazine | January 17, 2024

It was 2006. Mortgages were crashing, and businesses were going bust. Tony Blair was on his last legs in office as the longest-serving prime minister since Margaret Thatcher, and the hangover of ‘Cool Brittania’ was beginning to set in with an unexpected ferocity. Things were bleak when a young Alex Turner sang, “There ain’t no romance around there” through the public’s speakers. Arctic Monkeys were about to write themselves into musical history as the voice of a new generation.

The final song on their debut album, there has always been something special about ‘A Certain Romance’. In 2022, after the release of their seventh album, The Car, Turner seemed to find himself reflecting back on that 2006 track. To the musician, that early cut holds a clue to everything that was to come as he said the piece “showed that we did actually have these ambitions beyond what we once thought we were capable of”.

Coming in at over the five-minute mark, ‘A Certain Romance’ almost feels like the Arctic Monkeys’ version of a rock opera, summarising all the themes, feelings and energy that came before it on their seminal album Whatever People Say I Am, That’s What I’m Not. It has the cheekiness of ‘Fake Tales Of San Francisco’ and the catchy instrumentals of hits like ‘Dancing Shoes’ or ‘I Bet That You Look Good On The Dancefloor’. Utilising the northern charm of ‘Mardy Bum’, it stands as a final, neatly summarising point on the social commentary found in their early tracks like ‘From The Ritz To The Rubble’ or ‘Riot Van’. Really, it could be argued that ‘A Certain Romance’ is the ultimate example of Arctic Monkeys’ original sound, perfectly encapsulating all the things that made the world listen up and pay attention.

It’s like they seemed to know that, too, always allowing the song a special place. In fact, it was really the band’s opening remark. Years before the offer of a debut album came around, the group were a well-oiled machine with their own local hits. They had the northern live music scene in their hands as their homemade demo CD was passed around like everyone’s worst-kept secret. Beneath the Boardwalk features eight out of the 13 songs that would be on Whatever People Say I Am, That’s What I’m Not, albeit in a slightly different, lower-quality version. But the opening number, ‘A Certain Romance’, sounds just the same.

It’s all there, from the rolling opening drums to that final guitar solo. Recorded and produced in a rented studio at only age 17, the existence of ‘A Certain Romance’, one of the band’s most explorative and energetic numbers, in this form this early in their career feels like a diamond sitting in a mine. It proves that they were always onto something special.

They never needed any help. In fact, their producer, Jim Abbiss, noted that they even seemed nervous about the help. “I think they were probably a bit weary, like ‘who’s this guy? And is he gonna make our sound this or that.’”

They didn’t want anything to change too much, as the group already had the songs figured out. Turner certainly did, as the track’s meandering narrative about hometown lads, fights, and local boredom is already there. Talking on a podcast, original member Andy Nicholson revealed the story behind the song. “We had a practice room with a pool table in, and we had a party in there, and we invited another band who were friends of ours, and we all had some drinks,” he said. “Then something happened, someone throws a pool cue, someone throws a pool ball, and everyone ends up fighting,” he added, explaining the lyrics, “there’s boys in bands / And kids who like to scrap with pool cues in their hands.”

But the magic of Arctic Monkeys lies in their nuance. What begins as a snooty analysis of his local landscape is a genuinely affectionate take. “Well, over there, there’s friends of mine / What can I say? I’ve known ’em for a long long time / And, yeah, they might overstep the line / But you just cannot get angry in the same way,” Turner sings, looking around at his bandmates and lifelong friends. ‘A Certain Romance’ is not only a time capsule for the group’s beginnings but is an ode to all the people who were there with them. It’s an ode to the hometown that made them and all its various characters.

But as the last guitar solo roars to life, there is an unspoken statement that they’re going to be bigger than what they came from. “I remember when we were recording ‘A Certain Romance’ and having a conversation with the producer about the final guitar solo,” Turner told NME, recalling the moment these songs were reworked for their debut. But they wouldn’t let anyone mess with ‘A Certain Romance’, knowing exactly what they were doing and trying to say with that one. In the 2003 demo version, all the feeling is already there, and Turner wouldn’t risk it.

“There’s something that happens at the end of that track where we break some rules in a single moment,” he continued. What happens at the end of the piece feels even more special, considering how the album was recorded. “These are the songs we wanna do, and I think this is the order we wanna do them in,” Alex Turner told their producer, recounting the conversation in 2007 to RadioX, “And he goes, ‘alright, we’ll try to record them in that order as well.’” As the final song, that last guitar solo is the last thing recorded for the album, standing as a cathartic outlet and a chance for the band to prove themselves.

“We focused on the [emotional] effect of the instrumentals over the words,” Turner reflected on the track, concluding, “and I feel like we’ve been trying to do that again and again since then.”

+

[mindshelter]

yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah 

this guy really had. no idea. not a clue this snotty know-it-all uppity asshole was going to become an incredibly dear friend. he cared for tim and valued their relationship, sure, but there was a significant amount of resentment present thanks to kon assuming tim considered himself above the rest of them— so it’s so neat seeing how drastically the tone of their relationship changes after kon begins to learn just how self-critical tim can be, and sees tim’s doubts about his capacity to lead and fill an impossibly large pair of shoes. 

his frustrations with tim largely vanish, and their casual friendship with. faint traces of antagonism deepens; it becomes so warm and wholly supportive: robin becomes his close friend. his confidant. his secret-keeper. of course tim has his tendencies towards being a jackass, but to kon... that’s the boy who promised him nothing would change after discovering kon’s connection to lex. who’d roll his eyes good-naturedly when kon teases him, and tease him right back. who’d drop everything to help him (leaving his post in blüdhaven after the city was destroyed, not knowing if his stepmother, uncle for hire, or even if dick was alright— or alive, for the matter), because kon is family too. that’s the boy he now knows must be hurting, but still wants nothing more than to do the world some good. all he hopes is to make it a little safer, a little happier. 

for two people who are both so completely terrified of what they might become— who are so convinced they may really be rotten at their cores, it’s fitting that once their misconceptions of one another were stripped away, the only thing either of them could find was someone to love. 

(young justice (1998) #38/robin (1993) #146)

[perexcri]

happy one year to her and one of my better opening lines for a fic <3

now, because i'm curious:

[rosykims]

like out of all the many, many traumas ive given elspeth my favorite has gotta be the deep roads lol. and specifically the way she never really got OUT of them. yeah so maybe her body did but not HER. shes still down there with ruck and helspith every time she closes her eyes. and during future expeditions when she goes down into the deep roads for real, it doesnt feel like some horrible nightmare it feels like REALITY and its the surface and love and warmth and alistair thats nothing more than a pleasant dream. one shes always going to wake up from. bc even in her happiest moments she's never not aware of the darkspawn digging up towards her just a few miles under her feet. and never not feeling the eyes of the deep roads looking at her, gleefully waiting for her, and knowing its not going anywhere

[majorbaby]

Hi Mr. majorbaby.... I know you like the early years but can you share your top 10 from season 4 to season 11? I'm curious 👀🤔

idk if you're around still because this ask is pretty old, sorry about that. i was procrastinating because i was writing out some explanations but I think those might be better suited to individual posts at some point.

tbh i consider season 4 early years because i separate "early" from "later" based on larry gelbart's tenure, not the cast shakeup. season 5 half-qualifies because gene reynolds was still around, but the gelbart-reynolds writing and producing partnership is what really defines the "early years" era for me. if i responded to your question as phrased, a good half of the episodes would be season 4 eps lol, so 5-11 it is:

s05e08: Dear Sigmund s05e14: Hawk's Nightmare s06e05: War of Nerves s06e08: In Love and War s07e02: Peace on Us s08e03: Guerilla My Dreams s09e01: The Best of Enemies s09e12: Depressing News s10e05: Give em Hell Hawkeye s10e20: Sons and Bowlers

[tarmac-rat]

Cyberpunk 2077: Johnny Silverhand + me bullying him in my tags (part 2)

Part 1 here

Bonus (someone tell me why can't I stop loving this dingus):

[theflyingfeeling]

...💇‍♀️

[lilacthebooklover]

i just realised it's april now oh my gosh, my ao3 birthday's in 10 days! how fun :D

[witchwhaat]

🥀

[syncrovoid-presents]

Researching for my hazbin fic (A Cannibal's Guide on Living Comfortably) has also made me realize that my adoptive family (and me in relation to my birth family) actually suffer from cultural loss. And this ties to my adoptive family being half french like Alastor.

This is sort of a personal ramble about my experiences and how it relates to cultural loss. Just thoughts I've been having that's making me rethink a lot of things from my life.

(Technically I'm not but that's a whole other thing. I was found as a kid and never allowed to learn about my birth family or heritage so yeah. I'm just whatever people say I am. Means I have double the cultural loss, both from the people that raised me and my own! Yippee! <- sarcastic)

Both my parents are half french and grew up in small communities where there was very very high English vs French tensions. Both of my parents parent's decided that it would be best to give their children the easiest life they could so they raised them as English as possible.

They weren't allowed to learn french and were punished if they tried (both by family and the community. It was a lot worse where my mother grew up), and weren't allowed to continue any traditions, songs, or anything culturally French. Assimilation was the best chance at a future, but meant that they lost all ties to culture that wasn't acceptably English/colonial.

They were born a long time ago, so this was during the era of corporal punishment in school, my mother wasn't allowed to wear pants, my father was punished repeatedly for using his left hand, etc. They were also forced into churches because that's what The Good English Do, even though neither are religious now nor would they have been forced to if the hatred against the french hadn't been so strong.

The small town my mom grew up in had a segregated neighbourhood for the french, and her family fought to cut all ties. Her mother was french but was forced to only speak English and cut all ties to her family.

I don't know as much for my father, but it was his father that refused to teach or share anything French because of the hardships he went through growing up (he also ran away and lied about his age to fight in the war too young, so he likely faced heavy trauma too)

While neither of my parents are half english, they were able to pass as english at the expense of their cultural identity and connection to their family. I've spoken to my mother about it and she says white culture is genocide, but I don't know if she realizes how it hurt her too (not to say the french did nothing wrong. They were colonialists and took part in genocide as well)

It's weird to realize. I was put in french immersion and while my french isn't great, I've realized that my parents did that to give me the only opportunity I could have to learn about their lost culture. They learned a bit from me and would use french words and sometimes share translation quirks their parents had caused by learning english after french.

I grew up thinking that because I don't know anyone I'm related to that i had no culture. I've realized that part of the reason it feels that way is because anything non-English was forced out of people. The more you could pass as english the heavier the assimilation is. To join the oppressors is to sacrifice culture, history, and family, but that's a choice both my parents parent's made and it's one we all struggle with.

As far as I go, I don't know my precise ancestry, but I do know my birth grandparents fled from a country that was dealing with fighting for independence and a highly struggling economy. I'm not supposed to know that or know anything more, but from what I can guess and based on what people have said I look like (closest thing I got) my ancestors dealt with fighting against being colonized for centuries, their culture and history actively being destroyed and demonized, and the language borderline dead because of it (isnt the british imperialism great? <- sarcasm). A bit over a century ago it would have been the cause of much prejudice and hatred, but like my adoptive parents parent's they traded culture for assimilation.

It's.... weird. There's not much I can change nor not much I can do with this information movie forwards. It has helped me connect my experiences more with that of cultural loss, especially those felt by others who don't know any birth family. Because I pass as white (I do not know my genetics, so I'd rather say that than call myself white. Especially because what ancestry I do know I have weren't historically called white and faced discrimination by white folks) I previously thought these experiences could not apply to me.

As a side note, I do hold the belief that orphans like me, or others that lacked any family for much of their lives are part of a "hidden" minority. I faced a lot of extra difficulties, social pushback, and was treated worse than my peers because I am an orphan, as did different foster siblings I had over the years. Adoption means either never speaking about my life to pass as "normal" or speak about it and face the consequences. Every person's experiences are different when it comes to this, but it really changed the expectations adults had on me and forced me to be more mature, resilient, perfectionistic and less reactive to my peers. The expectation was if you acted bad you didn't appreciate having a home and therefore didn't deserve it. What others kids could get away with can be what loses your home when you grow up an orphan.

Anywho, circling back to my fic I'll be adding some elements of my experiences in there too. Not as the main focus, mind you, but some of the struggles of adapting/assimilating to the majority to avoid discrimination will be present (as well as some French (more focused on Creole French history. It was something a few of my french teachers focused a lot on) ). Just background info, I'm as of yet undecided on how much of a character study it will all be, but if it does go into it more then these themes will be present