#nico to sauber

[fin-stabilized]

esports ass announcement

[simplywrong]

Since there is no race this Sunday, I made a thing

[noahkahansversion]

i cry over the haas boys constantly, cry about lance stroll, cried about logan, cried about the carlando podium, cry about daniel being outshined by yuki, cry about liam lawson not getting a seat even when he was outperforming yuki, cry about lewis and nico, cry about lew to ferrari, cry about every mention of jules, like im such a crier

-this was my rant to my friend about a tiktok i saw saying they cried over the drivers a lot, and just yeah. of course i cry over the drivers all the time. i cry over everything.

AS WELL!! I watched the Melbourne grand prix last night, it’s the first race I’ve ever watched and honestly? I’m so happy my first race was a non redbull win! It was so so cool, and the ferrari team all singing the italian anthem together at the end? like driving me insane this sport is so gorgeous guys. i just love it so much. also go aston martin, really sucks about the fernando penalty but did kinda look like he was breaking early. george russell crash 😭 the panic in his voice over the radio calling for a red flag? so so heartbreaking, i was so scared for him. i’m really proud of haas for getting two cars in the points, slay for yuki for getting points, shame for williams after all they’re shit about taking logan out of the car just to not get points, and then more horrid pit stops for stake/kick/sauber whatever they’re called! and alpine, driving their tractors.

[shitapril]

to me, nico hulkenberg to kick sauber is an end of an era.

nico in haas gave us the adorable rivals to teammates storyline that netflix tried to create with kevin magnussen, two unproblematic blond hunks who care about their kids and not much else, and two absolute teammates who messed with the kids and the entire midfield to make a single point and are currently doing better than three whole teams - it’s the end of an era.

[koalapastries]

ok race summary:

perez loses p2 early

something happened between the ferraris at the start?

alpine hits a mechanic with a tyre

5 second pit stop for zhou

valtteri loses engine power and dnfs (sad)

kmag hits yuki during safety car and yuki dnfs (sad)

drivers bunch up like an accordion bc sainz does something weird with a gap to perez? (i don't understand this yet fully)

ricciardo hits oscar and lance hits ricciardo

ricciardo and oscar both have gearbox damage

aston takes a whole minute to replace lance's front wing

ricciardo retires

logan comes out of the pits incorrectly (?)

10 second penalty to logan

10 second penalty to lance

10 second penalty to kmag

lance and kmag racing fiercely for p16

sir lewis p18 to p9!!

alonso had a terrible tyre strategy

alonso makes up 6.5 seconds in 6 laps

lando dotd

nico rosberg is hilarious

+ bonus post-race before i turned it off:

ricciardo is apparently a mind reader?

[f1girlygirl]

And then you wake up with news like that

[scopeiguess]

Ferrari are gonna need another tittle sponsor if they sign newey

[lecsbooty]

Mercedes being mid, RB downfall loading all this happening while Fred in the background coming up with Avengers masterplan for Ferrari dominance return to the sport properly.

At this rate, Fred might be replacing Pope if the actually wins a champions in coming years! 😭

lmfao anon, summoning the artists of tumblr because i NEED a tangible image of my beloved frederic as the pope, amen!

ok no but fr the only happy persons currently in the paddock are:

fred ofc

charlie because i know hes just a girl so hes also being delusional like the rest of us

hUUUUUULkenberg for obvious reasons (mans is getting his win in that audi trust)

hamilton because this is the last year hes got to put up w that car(cass)

silly season hath officially commenced!

[f1tfballetc]

Two latest news in F1 happening today....

Hulkenberg is set to leave Haas in the end of 2024 season and will join Kick Sauber team for next year.

P.S.: It was also confirmed by Audi Sport in their Instagram account that he will join forces with the said team in 2026.

Another silly season, eh?

📷: f1 (via Instagram)

[scout-likes-sharks]

Today’s Thought: Danny Ric’s Pronunciation of Nico ULLKINBERG

I’m living for silly season

[deductordemigod]

so nico (hulkenberg not rosberg) has moved to sauber for (presumably) the next two years, meaning that either valtteri or zhou don't have a seat at sauber next year (maybe even a seat at all). which, firstly, good for hulk, he's been out performing that haas consistently. secondly, sucks for either valtteri or zhou (and something tells me it'll be valtteri, which really does suck cause he is a good driver). thirdly, im pretty sure we all know that hulk moved to sauber mainly for the allure of audi in 2026, which lots of people keep mentioning. i will say this: i will die of laughter if 2026 comes around and audi are absolute rubbish, like behind haas, behind vcarb/alpha tauri/torro rosso, behind ALPINE, i will die. because we've all built up so much hype around audi joining like they're going to be challenging for podiums and the like, so i will die of laughter. however, hulks move does take away my delusion of sebastian vettel doing a schumacher and coming out of retirement for audi (german wdc driver for a german team). it could still happen, but something tells me that if audi wants to replicate the two german drivers for german team thing mercedes had in the early 2010s with rosberg and schumacher, they'll go with a younger driver than seb, although im not sure what younger drivers really fit the criteria.

[matchnightt]

WDYM NICO TO KICK??? WHOS LEAVING

[myfeelisfunny]

okay but I'm actually not really surprised by the Hülkenberg Audi thing...only German driver on the grid gets scooped up by new German team, fork found in kitchen...

[marioandretti]

No more Zhou and Valtteri next year because of fucking Hulkenberg??? Fuck this sport for real

[scrollonso]

well hello nico

[anonduck07]

2024 Chinese GP: Recap + Results

Another one! Fair warning that it's the longest one so far, but I blame that on the 3 safety cars

P1 is Max Verstappen, who takes his first Chinese GP win, leading by about 14 seconds!

Yes the car is great, but the guy behind the wheel is also having to deliver - Crofty about Verstappen post-race

Red Bull also sets the fastest pit stop of the race, double stacking Verstappen and Perez under the full safety car and setting 1.9 and 2.0 seconds respectively.

Lando Norris is P2, his best finish since 2023 brazillian GP. He was also voted DOTD, winning just ahead of Hamilton and Alonso, who were also fan favourite picks. He was a little unhappy after he missed out on pitting under the safety car, but all ends well for him.

He [Norris] is not a happy bunny - Crofty, probably, about the missed pit stop

Woop Woop! I told you we would get past the Ferraris. - Norris, after crossing the finish line

Checo Perez places P3, yet another Red Bull double podium! There was an interesting 5 second gap from him to Norris, likely due to Norris having fresher tires. At the beginning though, he pulled some nice moves, regaining his position from Alonso within a few laps of him losing it.

P4 and 5 were the two Ferraris, Leclerc finishing in front of Sainz for the first time this season. They had a bit of a clash at the start, but nothing that the broadcast really focused on.

P6 was George Russell

P7 was Alonso, who was placed on an interesting strategy for the last several laps. He pitted for mediums, allowing him to overtake Ocon, then Hulkenberg, then Hamilton and Piastri.

P8 was Piastri who, keep in mind, has never driven at this circuit before

P9 was Hamilton, who is DOTD in my heart. He struggled with his tires at the start, being only one of four drivers on softs (everyone else on mediums, except Magnussen). He seemed to fare better after pitting for mediums, making his way to finish P9 after starting P18 :)

We also got a few moments of Nico Rosberg trying to be on some sort of wavelength with Lewis while commentating:

He's Lewis Hamilton, so yes he can…get into the points…im sure he'll move up fine - Nico Rosberg

I'm making no ground with this tyre - Lewis Hamilton That's not what we want to hear - Nico Rosberg

I can't even catch him, Mate. This car is so slow. - Lewis Hamilton That's exactly what I was going to say - Nico Rosberg (Lap 17)

P10 was Hulkenberg, yet again managing points for HAAS

P11 was Esteban Ocon

P12 was Alex Albon, who had a complaint about Ocon "moving like a ---- everywhere on the breaks." on Lap 1

P13 was Gasly, who set the slowest pit stop (19.3 sec) after an incident in the pits where a loose tire hit a mechanic when he was set to be released.

Is he okay? - Pierre Gasly All good here Pierre - Alpine

An unfortunate no-points finish for Zhou, who places P14 at his home GP, but still a very emotional day for him.

This is a dream to me as a kid, so thanks for all the Chinese fans here and back home watching TV and thank you to my team…let's keep working. - Zhou Guanyu, after he gets out of the car

Sauber, as always, had issues with their pit stops. Zhou's first one was quick compared to their previous ones, at only 3.0 seconds, but his stop under the physical safety car was the second slowest at 5.3 seconds.

He had a short fight against Sargeant and picked up some damage after contact with Magnussen near the end, losing his front wing end plate in the process, which couldn't have helped his position.

P15 was Magnussen, who always seems to be at the scene of the crime. He also picked up a 10 second penalty for infringing on the safety car.

P16 was Stroll, after picking up a 10 second penalty for causing a collision. He also had a battle for 16th with Magnussen, which was pretty interesting.

P17 was Sargeant, who was doing pretty well for the most part. Then, he stacked up a 10 second penalty for the same reason as Magnussen.

DNFS

The first yellow flag was also the first DNF of the race, caused by Bottas whose engine reportedly failed. The FIA changed the yellow flag to a virtual safety car, then a full safety car, all within a minute or two. Truly a testament to their amazing decision making skills.

The second yellow flag was caused by Yuki Tsunoda's spin out at lap 27, after contact with Kevin Magnussen that led to Tsunoda having to DNF and Magnussen going into the pits for a punctured tire.

Just minutes later, his teammate also DNFs, as Stroll collides with the back of Daniel Ricciardo's RB under the safety car. This was likely due to the fact that Ricciardo was the only one who hadn't pitted for fresh tires during the last safety car, as well as the fact that he was trying to avoid bumping Piastri, who was trying to avoid Russell, who was trying to avoid Alonso. Stroll recieved a 10 second penalty for causing a collision, but Daniel retired on lap 33 after reporting floor damage.

This idiot just slammed on the brake! Check wing damage - Lance Stroll

I've got no fucking rear on exits - Daniel Ricciardo

Before that though, his drive was going "superb" (in the words of Nico Rosberg), as he was P9 and had made a switcheroo overtake on his teammate at turn 3.