#no typo checking we post the first draft like men

[science-fiction-is-real]

“The Search”, it’s problems, and how to fix it.   PART 2, OZAI

Some of us really liked “The Search,” which tell the story of Zuko’s mom and her fate.  Other’s of us.... didn’t.

My writer’s instinct tells me to fix any story I don’t like.  So here it is.

In my last analytical post, I talked about Ursa, and how she’s a total badass in the show, but is completely mishandled in the comics.  I also talked about some changes I would make if I were handed the reigns to rewrite “the search.”

Villains are SUPER important to stories so I have a lot to say about this here in part two.

While “The Search” is Ursa’s story, stories are driven by conflict, and so the villain is often just as important as the main character. When it came to Ozai, Gene and Bryke had an amazing opportunity to create something interesting, dynamic, and intimidating, and boy did they drop the ball.

So here is Ozai in terms of “The Search,” what his problems are, and how I would fix them.

Villains, as the main source of conflict, are the power house of any story, and so they need to be done well.  Watching Avatar and Legend of Korra, Bryke prove themselves to be kings when it comes to their villains. Every single one of the bastards struck a balance between being terrifying and being believably human.  (Except for Unalaq.  Fuck you Unalaq)  Ozai was not necessarily a complex character in the show. This was because he was supposed to be more of a symbol of evil than a character in his own right.  But Even Ozai's humanity is shoved down our throats toward the end.  He sure was cute in that baby picture.

But Ozai can’t be the same thing in the comics than he was in the show.  In “The Search” we see him in a more intimate setting, as Ursa’s husband and Zuko and Azula’s father.  He doesn’t get to be a mere symbolic evil anymore.  Now he has to be a walking breathing human being with an interesting personality.  Can he make the switch?

Spoiler alert, he doesn’t make the switch very well.

I don’t think Bryke and Gene recognized how cool an opportunity they had when dealing with person Ozai as opposed to just symbolic Ozai.  

Think about some of the best villains in fiction/literature:   Satan was once Lucifer, Darth was once Anakin, Frankenstein and Monster both were never predestined for their villainous rivalry.  These characters are interesting and timeless because they are PEOPLE first and villains second.  They became evil not because it was fun but because of decisions they actively made, based on complex emotions, beliefs, and desires.  

Presenting villains as humans doesn’t take away their scariness.  The opposite is true.  Seeing humanity in villains disturbs us because it reminds us 1) anyone is capable of evil, and 2) people we hate are human beings too.  Also.  When villains have complex thoughts, feelings, and emotions, this gives them strong motivations, and shows us they are actually DRIVEN to commit evil deeds.

The writers could have done this with Ozai.  But they took that opportunity presented to them by “The Search” and they flushed it down the toilet.

Ozai in the comics certainly LOOKS like a human character.  He does human-ish things, like working out, eating dinner with his family, sharing sexual tension with his wife.  But the writers forget something pretty basic about humans when they delt with Ozai.  Humans have behaviors that are driven by thoughts, desires, and emotions.  Ozai has behaviors, and those behaviors, uhm... sort of.. kind of... add to the plot, But the thoughts, desires, and emotions behind them are self contradictory, poorly explained, or just missing all together.

 Ozai’s actions are so confusing I had to go back to read the comic again just to figure out what the writers were trying to do with him.  I am thoroughly convinced the writers hadn’t the slightest clue what was going on in that evil little noggin, nor did they give the slightest fuck. They spent maybe five minutes on the dude and his dialogue.  The result is neither interesting nor intimidating.

In order to be as unsympathetic as possible, Comics Ozai basically follows the behavior pattern of “handle every situation as badly as I possibly can" regardless if it fits any type of concrete motivation.  In fact Ozai isn’t really allowed to have any thoughts, feelings, or motivations at all.  He is not allowed to show any emotion that doesn’t fall between grumpy and hateful. No other emotions allowed!  Otherwise he might run the risk of being relatable, and God forbid a villain show any of that humanity the show worked so hard to convince us villains have. As a result, his behavior has no consistency.  If this were a Criminal Minds episode, they would profile Ozai as being multiple UnSubs who are not actually working together. 

They can’t get the guy pinned down.  At first they play him off as a jealous and possessive husband.  Of course, Ozai doesn’t show any of the emotions that tend to go along with jealousy and possessiveness.  He shows no sexual or romantic attraction to Ursa.  He suffers no fear of abandonment.  Those are no-no emotions for Ozai.  But he’s jealous anyway.  He reads her mail, he forbids her to contact or talk about her family, he puts a hit out on her old boyfriend.   But then, after spending several pages being jealous and possessive, Ozai suddenly decides to ask Ursa for a quick and amicable divorce right after the plot to kill Azulon is established.  Jealous possessive types usually panic at the thought of separation with their partner, but Ozai actually seems to take glee in the thought of Ursa leaving. Which is it Ozai?  Do you want to control and possess the woman or do you hate her and want her gone?  Make up your fucking mind.

Just as confusing is how he treats Zuko. Abuse by a parent toward a child is always confusing and tragic.  But real dick parents either have no motivation at all for their abuse (other then whatever behavior the victim did to trigger it), or they believe their abuse to be a natural part of parenting.  Ozai actually gives us a more creative reason for his cruelty.  He does it to punish Ursa for her lie about Zuko’s parentage.  We’re supposed to interpret this as Ozai being a sadistic prick.  But if Ozai were really just a sadistic prick, he wouldn’t wait for Ursa to give him an excuse to pick on Zuko.  And if Ursa really was the cause of his abuse, the abuse would stop after Ursa left.  Also why does Ozai take so much glee in Azulon’s order to kill Zuko?  YOU’RE BEING PUNISHED OZAI!  Azulon is telling you to kill Zuko as a PUNISHMENT.  Either its a punishment or it was something you were going to do all along.  It can’t be both. What the hell is going on?

Ozai’s confused motivation means that he isn’t really that intimidating throughout the story.  He’s actually kind of something to laugh at.  A lot of the supposedly scary and evil things he does also fall flat under closer inspection.  When he’s jealous about Ursa’s former boyfriend he doesn’t go after him herself, but instead hires a hit man, who fails.  He tells Ursa not to contact her home town, but he seems to care little about the letters she writes her boyfriend, even though he has been intercepting them for years (until the lie about Zuko’s parentage).  He’s supposed to be seen as conniving and ambitions, but he indicates no interest or plans to seize political power until his wife dictates letter by letter how he can do it.  We don’t even get to see him fight, except against some training dummies.  For such a supposedly dastardly villain he isn’t very ballsy or active in the narrative.  Some of you may disagree with me on that, but I thought he could have done more.

One reason this one-dimensional Ozai bothers me so much is because of how The Search makes a half-hearted effort to have a discussion on abuse and abusive family dynamics.  Ozai is an abuser, but real life abusers aren't dangerous because they happen to be evil for evil's sake, they are dangerous because their cruelty is mixed in with the more human, positive aspects of family life as well.  Abusers use affection and charm to gain control just as much as they use cruelty.  Some times abusers and victims actually have strong, loving feelings for each other, which only further entangles their victims in the cycle.  If “The Search” wants to have a conversation on such a real and pressing topic, it isn't very responsible of them to portray the issue in such a one dimensional and unrealistic way.

Long story short, Bryke had an opportunity to flesh out their best villains they had, and they blew it.  Villains are the source of conflict, and thus driving engines of a story.  Villains are extremely important and need to be done with care.  Bryke blew it.  It makes me want to scream into a pillow.  

SO.... HOW DO WE FIX THIS....?

A good version of the Search could go in one of two different directions.  

One)  They could stick with the story mostly as it is, where Ozai is evil from the beginning and is the unchallenged antagonist throughout the story.  This is more time efficient.

Two) They could really take advantage of the chance to show Ozai as a human being, and give us some backstory on him and the origins of his evil nature.  They could show him as Anakin turning into Darth if you will.

But either of these routes will have some things in common that will need to be fixed.

The Current Search shows an Ozai half-heartedly attempting “schemes” and “plots,” but never in a way that truely convinces us he’s a truely effective antagonist.  The first thing Search 2.0 should do is to show Ozai taking a much more active, if not violent role in the story events.  Ozai’s main character trait it seems is his ambition.  So lets let him be ambitious.  Lets let him grab the royal court by its balls and man handle it to his liking.  Also, its a damn shame we had an action-centered comic where Ozai (one of the best fire benders in the ATLA universe) was the main bad guy, and we didn’t get to see him in a single fight.  Let’s put him in a fight.  Most importantly, in order to convince the reader that Ozai should truely frighten them, his actions need to have very clear and explicit motivations, AND must be successful at least a large part of the time--with consequences to those around him.

Included in this, I want to see Ozai do a much more convincing job playing the abuser.  I want to see him charm and manipulate as well as throw his weight around.  I want to see him actually make the audience feel trapped and claustrophobic as they relate to the family trapped under his thumb.  You may say that is too dark, but must I remind you Show Ozai burned a kid’s face off in the very first season.  We have wiggle room when it comes to darkness.

Next

Ozai needs emotional range.  Every character but him is allowed to show range.  Villains need as much range as the protagonists, including moments of emotional vulnerability and non-threatening emotions.  Emotional vulnerability doesn’t make villains less scary.  It actually does the opposite. Villains are scary when we know their evil deeds have a strong motivation behind them.  And that strong motivation can only come when characters have emotions that drive their actions.   Frankenstein’s monster is a good example of a villain who demonstrates strong, if not over dramatic emotional range.  It’s not the monsters anger or grumpiness that makes him scary, it’s his loneliness, sense of loss, and longing to be loved that do, because we know that THOSE are the emotions that will drive him to fuck a bitch up.

You may also worry that showing an emotionally vulnerable, and dare I say relatable, Ozai would make the reader feel morrally confused.  Good.  Good stories ARE morally confusing.  Tell me you weren’t morally confused when you saw Darth Vader as a ten year old child, or when someone told you FRANKENSTEIN and not the monster might be the bad guy, or when someone told you the devil himself used to work for God, OR WHEN BRYKE SHOWED YOU OZAI’S BABY PICTURE RIGHT BEFORE AANG WAS SUPPOSED TO KILL HIM.  We were morally confused when those things happened, but it made us smarter and wiser because it challenged our perceptions.  If we take the second story option this will be an absolute necessity.

What kind of emotions might those be?  Well, it depends on what type of story line we would decide to go with for Search 2.0. There are some things to work with here.  Ozai is shown having a toxic relationship with his own father.  I could imagine a story line where he attempts to take the pain and hurt from that rejection, and channel it into rising above his station, into unbridled ambition that drives him to destroy his own family while securing his own power.  It is a well established fact that Ozai is ambitious.  We could explore how Ozai feels when asked by his father to kill his own son, in the sense that Ozai takes it as a punishment--torn between protecting his own bloodline vs his compulsive need to please his father.  We could explore what sort of feelings, if any, he has toward Ursa, which is especially important considering this is Ursa’s story.

 If we want to stick as much to canon as possible, let’s recall that Show Ozai reads as a classic narcissist, by the technical definition of the word. His treatment of Zuko and Azula follows typical patterns of Narcissistic abusers, and he also does shit like usurp the throne from his grieving brother and crown himself Phoenix King.  Of course, being a Narcissist does NOT exclude him from being emotionally complex and even in some ways relatable.  Narcisist don’t experience empathy or true love, but they do experience pretty much every other emotion on the table.

Some more plot specific things.. I would get rid of the jealous husband angle.  It seems a little Cliche to me.  I think Ozai would be much too concerned with cementing his own power in the court to worry about who Ursa is writing letters too.

Lets PLEASE get rid of the plot point where Ozai decides to abuse Zuko because he’s trying to get back at Ursa.  It doesn’t make any sense to me.  We can explore why he hates his son if we want.  I have my own theories.  Maybe Azulon hates Zuko, and because Ozai wants to suck up to his dad, he hates Zuko too.  Or maybe Ozai blames Zuko for Azulon’s death and Ursa’s leaving.  Afteral if it hadn’t been to protect Zuko’s life, Ursa would not have killed Azulon and left.  Or maybe Zuko takes after Ozai in many different ways, and Ozai hates himself, and therefore hates Zuko.  Or maybe he’s just a big fat dick who needs a punching bag and learned abusive behavior patterns from his own dad.

Sorry that was so long, pepes, you are treasures for hearing me out.

Please comment if you have any thoughts

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

New in Town

Warnings: noncon sex.

This is dark!Lumberjack!Thor and explicit. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: You start a new job in a new town but find your welcome not so warm.

Note: Another piece for @imanuglywombat​ and @nellblazer​‘s Lumberjack Challenge. I needed me a big, scary Thor so here we go!

Thank you. Love you guys!

As always, if you can, please leave some feedback, like and reblog <3

It was your first day and you already felt in way over your head. Your predecessor had left quite the mess and it would take a while to clean it all up. The filing cabinet had little actual organization to it and the computer, well that was just a bunch of nonsensically titled files dropped in random folders. It would take you the better part of a month just to get things in order.

You suspected however, that even that wouldn’t be fast enough for you prickly new boss. Loki, who preferred Mr. Laufeyson, had been short as he showed you your desk and nonchalantly pointed to the filing cabinet and assured you everything was ready to go. Well, it was not at all. Payroll, scheduling, among other admin to be done. Your only saving grace was that last week’s pay had already been doled out and you only need to figure out that week’s before, oh, great, end of the day.

You shivered as the walls of the portable shook with the frigid gust. It was poor protection from the northern chill and you kept your jacket on and only slightly unzipped as you went about your work. If your gloves weren’t so thick, you’d have kept them on as well.

As you jotted down names and hours and switched between windows, the door opened and you sat up as a tall man entered abruptly. He slammed the door behind him as he glared around the office and tilted his head at you. Thick blonde hair poked out from beneath his wool cap and a golden beard trimmed his jaw. His flannel jacket was worn and stained and he smelled of pine and sweat as he neared your desk. He held a hatchet in his right hand and leaned it against the edge of your desk.

“Where’s Kevin?” He asked brusquely.

“Kevin? Oh, um, I was told he quit. I’m his replacement.” You smiled as best as you could as the large man loomed before you. 

Like most of the workers, he lived in the small town an hour down the road. You’d only just moved there and he was no doubt wary of the stranger staring back at him. Your employment had been hurried; so much so that much of your home was still in boxes stacked in your front room. 

“I can help you.” You offered.

“Where’s my brother?” He growled.

“Your brother?” You wondered.

“Loki,” He huffed. You blinked. They didn’t look like brothers.

“Oh, sorry,” You said. “Well, he’s just in his office but he did ask not to be disturbed.”

The man rolled his eyes and turned the hatchet flat. His nostrils flared.

“Typical.” He muttered. “I suppose it’s your job now. I’m short.”

“Short?” You repeated.

“I was paid for maybe 14 hours. I worked almost 50.” He barked. “And my check didn’t clear until last night. You wanna tell me why?”

“Well, sir,” You clicked a few buttons as you switched to last week. “If you give me my name I can see and I can fix the--”

“Odinson, Thor,” He said sharply. “I’m the yard warden. I’m the reason these saws run.”

“I understand,” You placated as you looked at the screen and squinted as you found his name. 

Sure his enough his hours were entered correctly but his pay had been miscalculated. You corrected the typo and clicked a few more buttons.

“The payment should clear by the end of the day.” You assured him.

“End of day?” He sneered and you pushed yourself away from the desk as he raised the hatchet and brought it crashing down into the wood. “I’ll be back if it doesn’t.”

Your eyes rounded and you gripped the arms of the chair. You looked up at him and he gave a sinister smirk. He turned and stormed out as you gaped at him. As the door clattered behind him you stood and reached for the hatchet. You pulled on it but it was lodged firmly beside your computer.

The door of the back office opened and Loki stepped through. He raised his eyebrows and sighed.

“Mmm, that didn’t happen to be my brother, did it?” He asked.

You nodded and let go of the axe. He neared and looked at the hatchet.

“What was it this time?” He touched the handle and his long fingers wrapped around it. He jerked it and the whole desk moved with it.

“Mistake in the payroll.” You answered. 

“Hmm,” He let go of the hatchet and shrugged. “Well, see it doesn’t happen again.”

You bit back your response. It hadn’t been your mistake. He spun away and head back to his office. 

“Wait? What about this?” You asked as you tugged on the axe again.

“Work around it,” He waved his fingers over his shoulder. “Desk is still in one piece.”

🍯

The next day was more of the same. You were suffocated by the amount of work to do and how your list grew ever longer. You wondered if perhaps whoever previously held the post had been plucked from the lumberyard. 

You sat on the floor next to the filing cabinet, the drawers open as you sorted papers into piles. As the door opened, you kept a pile from fluttering away with your foot and looked up at your visitor. It was the same man as the day before. Thor looked just as perturbed as then, if not more.

“Hello,” You said as you gathered up the piles, stack them perpendicularly to keep them separate as you neared the other side of your desk. “What can I do for you?”

“The schedule.” He said. “I need Saturday off.”

“Saturday?” You nodded and bent to look at your computer, searching through your programs. “I’m certain we can spare a saw--”

“No, we have to run all. You’ll have to find someone to cover me.” He insisted.

“Alright, well, it’s pretty short notice.”

“Look, I know how it works in the yard. We’ll fall behind if we don’t run all the saws.” He crossed his arms. “You get it, honey?”

You frowned and scrolled through the names. You’d be lucky to get anyone to say yes to a Saturday.

“Well,” You stood straight. “Why didn’t you request the time off?”

“Excuse me?” He snarled.

“It’s customary to request time off before a schedule is made,” You said. “So for me to find someone at such short notice, there’s only so much I can do.”

“You’ll find someone.” He huffed.

“With all due respect, I don’t go out there and tell you how to cut wood,” You said. “So, if you must have Saturday off, we might just need to be down a man.”

His nostrils flared and his jaw squared as he stepped closer to your desk. He dropped his arms and reached out to grip the hatchet still buried in the wood. He chuckled and ripped it out, shaking your desk.

“See that you don’t,” He warned as he turned and leaned the hatchet against his shoulder. “You can explain to my brother yourself why we don’t meet our numbers on Saturday then.”

“Oh, he’ll know why,” You affirmed and watched him disappear through the door, a draft skirting in past him.

You sniffed and glanced at the slit left in your desk. Great. Wonderful start.

🍯

Saturday was your first day off. You spent much of the day unpacking and settling into your new place. It was a small town and you still felt like the odd one out. Everyone knew everyone and you suspected, they didn’t want to know anyone else. 

As it got later, the night falling earlier there, you took a walk downtown and ordered some old-fashioned fish and chips from the shop downtown. You waited at a table along the wall as the cook talked and yelled in the kitchen and the couple at the front counter called out orders and rang them through.

You played with your phone, playing a matching game to keep you busy until your ticket came up. The chair across from yours scraped and you looked up at the broad figure on the other side of the table. Thor leaned an elbow on the table and stared up at the menus above the counter.

“Not from around here. I knew it.” He said. “Because I know everyone around here.”

“I’m sure you do,” You said stiffly.

He scoffed and scratched his beard. He leaned back against the wall as he sat sideways in the chair and flicked the corner of his receipt in his other hand.

“You city folk are all the same. You think you know everything.” He grumbled. “You’ve got this air about you. The way you walk around with your nose up.” He grimaced. “A real tight ass, just by looking at you.”

“If that’s what you think.” You shrugged. “I haven’t done anything against you so I don’t see why--”

“My town. My yard.” He slapped his hand down and gripped the edge of the table. “You won’t last. You’ll be on the same truck out of here soon enough.”

Your number was called and you stood. You tucked your phone in your purse and gave a tense smile.

“Have a good night,” You said evenly. “Hope you enjoyed your day off.”

You went to the counter and showed your ticket. You took the greasy paper bag and headed out without looking at the man still at the table brooding. You weren’t entirely sure why you’d riled him so, but you weren’t eager to provoke him further.

🍯

On Monday, you hunkered down with a thermos of coffee and set to sorting out the computer. You had to open every file and rename it, place it in the proper folder and back every bit of it up. It kept you busy, not that this job had let up, and you were content to lose yourself in the tedium.

When your lunchtime came around, you went out to your car to grab the lunch you’d forgotten on your passenger seat. You had been so preoccupied with your mental to do list, you had entirely overlooked it. As you carried your purple lunch tote back to the office building with its rippled tin walls, you passed by several of the workers on their own breaks.

Among them was the one man who’d proven himself troublesome. The rest of them had been understanding and were even relieved to be rid of the man who came before you. They were surprisingly patient even if they were a bit grim. Thor sat with several of his men on the log bench as they drank from steaming metal cups.

“So I get her home and she doesn’t even wait to get in the door before she has her shirt off.” Thor’s deep voice boomed as you neared. “I’m like honey, you know the neighbours like to talk. Well, she shut me up.”

You blinked and peeked over at the men. Thor smirked and winked as he caught your eye. You righted yourself and carried on.

“Had her bent over the kitchen table. She said she doesn’t fuck in bed.” He chortled. “Not high-maintenance like some.”

The men laughed as you climbed the steps of the office and turned back. Thor waved at you and then folded all but one finger. He pointed at you and looked at the men on either side of you.

“Not like that one.” He said. “Looking at her, I guarantee she hasn’t been fucked in at least a year. Maybe more.”

You winced and grabbed the door handle. You were embarrassed but angry. You knew if you said anything, it would only be worse, but you couldn’t just let him talk like that. You spun back and slipped inside, quickly snapping the door shut behind you.

You placed your lunch on your desk and crossed to the other door. You knocked and waited for Loki’s response. It was dull and already agitated. You entered and stood by the open door.

“What is it?” He looked up. “I’ve twenty minutes before I’m on my way out.”

“What-- Where?”

“Personal,” He said pointedly. “Now, why have you bothered me?”

“Look, I’m not trying to cause a fuss but… your brother,” You explained cautiously. “He’s been… extremely rude and his behaviour borders on harassment.”

“My brother?” He uttered. “Oh don’t mind him, that’s just the way he is. Repugnant, really, but you’re better off to ignore him.”

“I’ve done my best to but… are you not going to do anything? Say something to him?” You challenged.

“Why would I do that?” He leaned back in his chair and twirled his pen.

“Because if this continues, I will fire a report with the labour board for harassment.” You said.

“You’ve not been here a week and you’re coming up with these unfounded accusations,” He pointed the pen at you. “These men, they’re not used to a woman in the yard. My brother, especially. They’ll be even less hospitable if they hear this woman is whining to the boss.”

“I’m not--” You stopped yourself as he showed little interest in continuing the dialogue. In fact, he’d already traded the pen for his phone. “Suppose you’re right.”

“I am. Now don’t bother with my brother. He’ll leave you alone.” He waved you away like a bug. “Just do your work. That’s what I pay you for.”

🍯

In the five days you’d been at the lumberyard, Loki had left early twice or disappeared for midday meetings. You found your work was straightforward but he didn’t seem to care unless you made some glaring mistake. He was entirely unfazed as he left once more. You couldn’t blame him for not wanting to deal with his volatile brother and yet, that was his job.

Alone, you continued your overhaul of the filing system and reviewed the schedule for the next week. Your life had never been exciting, none of your jobs had been much different than this. A desk, an office, an endless pile of work. And yet this one felt more desolate. The walls did nothing against the cold winds and you could hear the buzz of saws and hollers of men without. All men. It only occurred to you then that there was not a woman beside yourself on the employee roll. Perhaps that was why you’d been met with hostility.

You checked your watch and shut down the old PC and locked up the filing cabinets. As you did whenever Loki flitted off, you killed the lights and locked the front door of the office behind you. You turned and tramped down the stairs onto the frozen ground. You could see your breath as the days grew colder and colder.

You stopped dead as you headed for the row of vehicles along the edge of the yard, all parked at an angle. You stared dumbly at your small Ford. That wasn’t good. A whole tree trunk laid across the car and its weight had sunken in the roof. What were the odds that a tree had traveled to fall on your car in particular. Well, you had a good idea who had left the rather large gift and you weren’t going to give them the satisfaction.

You turned and strode back to the office but again your fortune was not so kind. Thor strutted towards you with a big grin and his arms brushed against yours as he passed.

“Have a good night, honey,” He said.

“You too.” You returned rigidly and sped up.

You didn’t look back as you dug out the keys and unlocked the office. You slipped inside and closed yourself in as you pulled out your phone. You dialed the cab company as you peeked out between the blinds. Thor was stood by your car guffawing with a red-headed man at his handiwork.

Would Loki do anything about that?

🍯

In the back of the cab, you called the towing company and scheduled an appointment for the next night. Then you tried to phone Loki but he didn’t pick up so you e-mailed him with the picture you’d taken of your car. It was damage of property! Surely he had to do something. 

You checked the time and watched the meter run higher and higher. The commute was long as it was and seeing it in numbers made you even angrier. You wouldn’t have much time to cook or do much of anything.

As the taxi pulled up to your house, you charged the ride to your credit card and climbed out. You shivered as the dark blue sky shrouded your front yard. Voices carried from the next and you looked over the short iron fence. Your neighbour leaned on the rail of his porch as a tall figure stood in his yard. Your flesh went hot as you recognized Thor.

“You live around here, honey?” He asked as you turned away and scurried to your front door.

“Mmhmm,” You hummed as you unlocked your door.

“You’re home late.” He remarked.

You ignored him and swung the door open, quickly closing it behind you. Your neighbour, Earl, had proven an equally unfriendly man. He complained about your bin when you put out your garbage and the little fairy ornament you’d placed in the yard. If there was one thing the people in this stagnant town loathed, it was change.

You dropped your bag and shed your coat and boots. You yawned and stretched as you walked anxiously around your front room. How was it that you ran into Thor everywhere? Work, sure, but why was he suddenly chummy with your neighbour? You hadn’t been there long and it was a small town but it all just seemed too coincidental.

You went to the window and hooked a finger around the curtain to peer out. Thor was closer to the fence now, arms crossed as he nodded up at Earl. He lowered his eyes for a moment and then turned his face slightly. He grinned as he spied you on the other side of the drapes and you quickly backed away.

You weren’t going to run away because of him. You weren’t going to quit and you weren’t going to leave this town. His fragile masculinity could shatter for all you cared.

🍯

The next morning, Loki agreed to drive you to work. The ride was awkward but you were thankful only to contribute half of gas rather than a full fare. You hadn’t slept very well and spent much of the drive staring out the window as classical music droned from the stereo. You hadn’t expected anything different in the overpriced car.

At the office, you brewed a pot inside and poured your second cup of the day. You had to finish the next week’s schedule and finalize the payroll. The noise of the yard kept you working and had almost come to be a comfort to you as you sat staring at tight fonts and endless numbers.

You were interrupted by the door and you didn’t need to look up to know who stomped inside. Thor looked as happy as ever and you peered over anxiously as his heavy boots clunked along the floor.

“My brother?” He asked bluntly. “Has some business to deal with.”

“In his office,” You said.

He smiled and stared at you. He didn’t move at first but finally crossed to the other door. He didn’t knock and you heard Loki’s chagrined greeting as he entered. The door fell closed but did not click into place. You went back to your work and tried to ignore the rising voices that sifted through the thin wall.

“Prove it!” Thor boomed, followed by a bang. The door swung open and he thundered through with a snarl. He marched towards your desk as you sat straight and he planted his hands on the top. “Whiny little bitch.” He said. “You’ll see what happens to those who can’t keep their mouth shut.”

“Thor,” Loki warned from his office door. “Leave her be. Don’t get yourself into any more trouble.”

“Don’t talk to me like that,” Thor pushed himself away as he barked at his brother. “You sound like father.”

“And you sound ridiculous.” Loki said evenly. “Get back to work. I’m certain you can handle cutting wood. It’s truly not that complicated.”

Thor scowled and spun, sparing you not an ounce of his fury as he did. You watched him go, the door shuddering in its frame as it slammed once more. You let out a shaky breath and glanced over at Loki.

“I assure you, he will not bother you again.” Loki said coolly. “He is… impulsive and needs a little reasoning. Once he’s over his tantrum, it’ll all clear up.”

You nodded as he turned and strode back into his office. You’d been gripping the edge of the desk tightly and it took you a moment to unlock your fingers. You leaned back and clutched your head. You really hoped he was right.

🍯

The next day, you waited at your window, watching for Loki’s sleek black car. Another day after another restless night. You watched the pale morning through the glass and your phone vibed in your pocket. You pulled it out and swiped up as the notification from your boss appeared.

“Emergency in the city. I’ve made alternate arrangements. E-mail me your progress at end of day.”

You frowned and looked up as an engine rumbled outside. You cursed as you recognized the red pick-up and the shadow of the man behind the wheel. Was Loki really that stupid? Certainly he just didn’t care. Or maybe he really thought he could control his brother. You had doubts. Thor didn’t seem the type to be reeled in by any.

Well, you could always rack up even more debt on a cab; there and back. Dammit.

Thor honked and you winced. You grabbed your bag and slung it over your shoulder. You locked your door as you stepped out into the morning chill and turned to make your way to the idling truck. The doors clicked as you neared and you hesitantly opened the door. 

Thor stared down at you. You didn’t move.

“Well, get in,” He sneered. “Long way to go.”

You climbed up and shut the door. Before you buckled in, he was already in drive. You snapped the belt into place and slid your bag down to your feet.

“Thank you.” You said. He didn’t answer. “Look, I know you don’t like me and I know you don’t have to drive me so I do appreciate it.”

“Anything to get my brother off my back,” He shrugged. 

You were quiet. It was pointless trying to get into this man’s good graces. He had decided to have a grudge against you and you’d only stoked it by tattling on him. You should’ve just shut and smiled, as you always had. It was the essence of professionalism.

You bent your elbow against the door and held your chin as you watched the houses pass outside the window and thin to lumpy fields and forests. You were almost lulled to sleep by the steady mutter of the engine and the motion of the truck.

Then all at once you were tense. A warmth settled on your thigh and squeezed. You sat up and tried to pull away from Thor. He kept his other hand on the steering wheel and grinned at the road. You tried to shove his hand away and he gripped you tighter until you cried out.

“You shouldn’t distract me while I’m driving,” He said. “It’s dangerous.”

“What are you talking about?” You tried to pry his fingers off of you. “What are you--”

Slid his hand further and leaned over, just a little, as he turned his hand flat along your pelvis. He was strong and forced two finger down between your legs.

“Thor!” You gasped as you slapped his arm.

He veered, just a little, but didn’t relent.

“You don’t want me to lose control, do you, honey?” 

He pushed his fingers against the fabric of your pants and rubbed. You could feel the seam through your panties as he moved his hold hand. He was rough and it hurt. All the same, you felt a tingle. You clung to his arm in shock.

“Stop! Stop! You’re--”

“Shhhh,” He kept going as his other hand gripped the wheel tighter. “Don’t be such a bitch.”

He moved his hand faster as you tried to crush it with your thighs. He wedged his hand between your legs and kept on. You trembled as a painful pressure began to build and you sank back against the seat, terrified. 

“That’s it, honey.” He purred as your thighs quivered. “You just need to relax… get that stick out of your ass.”

“Thor--” You gulped. “Please-- st--”

His fingers were right on your clit. The fabric chafed but still the ripples swirled around you. You went rigid and then the sudden and unexpected release swelled and crashed. You let out a pathetic squeak and gripped the door as you spasmed, your legs falling apart as you rode out your orgasm against his large hand.

His palm dropped against your leg and he caressed you before slowly drawing away. Your panties were soaked and you were certain it was seeping through your pants too. You looked at yourself in the rearview mirror and covered your face. 

What just happened?

🍯

You hid in your office. When you finally arrived at the yard, you’d almost sprinted to the building. You closed yourself in and sat behind your desk as if it were a shield. It took you a while to focus, to be able to read clearly, to comprehend anything in front of you. And yet, you could still feel his hand between your legs. Every time you moved, your panties tickled your tender cunt.

At noon, an e-mail chimed in your inbox. Another message from Loki. He wasn’t half as attentive when he was on-site. You opened it and sighed. There was a severe weather warning and the yard would have to shut down for the storm. That meant everyone had to go home before they got stranded.

You zipped up the jacket you hadn’t taken off and went to the door. Go out, go out, go out. The sooner you were home, the better. But getting there…

You stepped outside and the door clattered behind you. You ambled down the stairs and crossed your arms against your chest as the wind swirled the light powdery snow around you. For now, it was little enough, but it would get worse.

You crossed the yard and followed the sound of saws. Arn was loading up a trailer with Cameron and they paused as you neared. You smiled, then frowned.

“Storm’s coming. Boss says we need to shut down.” You called to them.

“Shit,” Cameron looked up and wiped away the flakes that fell on his cheek. “Yeah, it’s coming.”

“We’ll tell the other,” Arn offered. “Thanks, miss.”

“Not at all. We need the saws off and everyone gone within the hour.” You explained loudly.

“What’s this?” Thor, as was his habit, appeared as if out of air. He clapped sawdust from his thick gloves. “Saws off?”

“Your brother. He wants the yard down for the storm.” You turned to him and edged away as he got closer.

Thor shook his head and huffed. He nodded to Arn and Cameron as he shrugged. “Go on. Tell the men. I’ll get the rest sorted.”

The two other men left their pile of chopped timber and strolled away to the saws. You spun away, eager to shut down the office and lock up. Thor’s voice stopped you.

“You’ll need a ride,” He said. “It’s gonna be a big one. Storm, that is.”

“Uh huh,” You grumbled as you turned back and crossed your arms. “I gotta go deal with the admin stuff.”

“I’ll stick around. Loki’s always the last to leave.” He said. “You’ll need to do a walk through. Make sure everything’s down.”

“I know,” You assured him. “It won’t take long.”

“I’ll take you through it.” He offered. “This is my yard, after all.”

“So you keep saying.” You uttered.

“I own half of it.” He countered. “My brother just does the paperwork.”

“Alright,” You continued to edge away. “I’ll just--”

“This is a place for men.” He hissed. “Women… just get in the way.”

You swallowed and said nothing. You turned and walked away as you felt him watching you. As you rounded the corner of the storehouse, he called out behind you. “I’m patient. I’ll be here.”

🍯

Thor’s truck was the only one left as you locked up the office and began your walk through of the saws and checked the doors of the storehouses. You checked that the cranes and lifts were all shut down as well, all the while Thor watched. It was as if he was judging you. You ignored him as best you could and announced that all was in order as you secured the edge of the tarp thrown over the stack of timber at the edge of the yard.

“You’re a quick learner,” Thor mused as you neared. “So you might know.”

“Know what?” You asked as a large flake hit the tip of your nose.

“That it’s too late,” He pointed up. “We won’t make it back in time.”

He kicked his boots in the blanket below. It was building by the second and the sky was almost pure white with the downfall. He was right and you hated that. Your stomach sank.

“You have chains?” You asked.

“Won’t do me much good if I can’t see,” He tilted his head and smirked. “There’s a kit in the office. Not the first time this has happened. You learn to expect it up here.”

“A kit?” You shook your head. 

“Some blankets, some food,” He came closer. “Keep ourselves comfy until this all clears up.”

You stared at him dumbly. You checked your watched and looked up at the sky again.

“No, we can--”

“We can’t,” He said firmly. “What’s wrong?” He neared. “You afraid of the big bad wolf?”

You shouldered past him and kicked through the thickening snow. “No.” You snipped back at him, his heavy boots crushed the snow in your snow. “I suppose you’re right.”

You climbed the stairs to the office and took out the key, fumbling with your thick gloves as Thor came up behind you. He pressed himself to your back as you frantically turned the key and stumbled inside. He chuckled as he followed and closed the door. You tucked the keys away in your purse and took out your phone. No signal.

You left your purse on your desk and sighed. Thor went to the door of Loki’s office and glanced back at you. “Kit’s in here. Easier to keep warm, too. Smaller space.” He waved you along. “He’s got an electric heater hidden under his desk too.”

You said nothing as you followed. You really had no choice. Stuck here with no way out but him, you’d just have to fend him off through the storm.

He held the door for you and shut the door behind you. His hand grazed your back and ass as he drew away and you watched him round Loki’s large desk and go to the corner behind the standing cabinet. He dragged out a large bin hidden there and unclasped the lid.

You watched him, twiddling your fingers as your mind raced. You felt the ache below still and you looked at his large glove hand as he turned to push the desk against the wall. He laid out a thick duvet on the floor and the small travel pillow atop it with a quilt. He untangled the cord of the electric heater and placed it beside the blankets. He flipped it on and stood.

“Well,” He said. “Some soups in there. Some preserved fruits.” He offered. “You hungry, honey?”

You were quiet as he removed his gloves. You went to the other side of the blanket and sat. You took your boots off and left them to melt on the floor. You pushed your feet under the quilt and leaned against the cold wall.

“Don’t call me honey,” You crossed your arms. “And I’m not hungry.”

He nodded and lowered himself next to you. He untied his boots and set them aside with his hat. His shoulder rested just above yours as he sat back. You closed your eyes and let out a long breath.

“He’s got whiskey. Bottom drawer.” Thor said. “It might warm you up… loosen you up at least.”

“No, thank you.” You opened your eyes and slid down onto your back and turned your back to him. The electric heater buzzed in the silence.

“What wrong, honey?” He taunted. “You want more, hmm? This morning wasn’t enough for you?”

“Leave me alone.” You hissed.

He slipped down behind you and before you could sit up, his arm was around your waist. He pushed himself against your back and his hot breath seeped into your scalp. He nuzzled the back of your head. It was even more apparent, laid against him, how large he was. You shivered.

“I can keep you nice and warm, honey,” He bent his arm and tugged at the zipper of your jacket. “Keep you distracted.”

“Stop,” You grabbed his hand as he pulled your zipper past your chest. “Thor!”

“I felt it earlier. The way you quaked.” He snarled. “You need this.”

“No,” You clutched his hand as he forced your zipped further. “Stop. I just… want to sleep. Wake up when this is… over.”

“Feel that,” He pushed his pelvis out so that his crotch was against your ass. “You owe me.”

“I said--” You gasped as he broke your zipper entirely and slid his hand under your jacket. “Thor!”

“Are you fighting me or yourself?” He rasped. “Hmmm?”

He slid his hand up your blouse and cupped your tit. You wiggled against him but were trapped in his embrace. He squeezed and pinched until you cried out. He snarled and brushed his lips against your ear.

“I bet you’re sweet, honey,” His hand crawled down your stomach. “Aren’t you?”

You whined helpless as his hand pushed beneath the elastic waist of your pants. He pulled free of your grasp as he continued lower and slipped down the front of your panties. You gasped as he pressed a finger to your cunt and found your clit. You squeezed your legs together and he pulled his hand back to pinch you.

“What do you want, honey?” He growled. “You want to let me in or you want me to hold you down?”

“Please--”

He withdrew his hand and grabbed your leg. He bent it and drew it back over his.

“You think you’ll win?” He shoved his hand back down your pants gruffly. “Really?”

“Please--”

“That’s it, keep begging, honey,” He pushed two fingers to your clit and twirled. You twitched and he snickered in your ear. “Weak.” He sneered as he pushed his fingers along your folds. “You’re already wet… or is that from earlier?”

You murmured as he dragged his fingertips back and once more focused on your clit. He nibbled your ear as he snarled and rocked his hips into you from behind, grinding against your ass.

“You’ll want to be ready for me.” He gristled. “Nice…” He flicked his fingers and you groaned. “And…” He did it again and you whined. “Ready.”

You bit your lip as you fought against the tide that flowed from his touch. He rubbed you until you were breathless and ready to cum. He stopped suddenly and felt you tremble against him. He pulled his hand back and pushed your leg down. He brought his fingers up to his lips, just beside your head and sucked them noisily.

“Sweet as pie.” He muttered.

He gripped the back of your pants and wrenched them down roughly along with your panties. The cold air raised bumps on your flesh.

You reached out and tried to drag yourself away from him. He swiftly caught you and rolled you back to him.

“You don’t want to do that, honey,” He warned as he squeezed your hip. “Do you really want me to break you?”

You gulped and reached to grasp the small pillow lodged beneath your neck. He reached between your bodies and pulled up his jacket and you heard the subtle whisper of his zipper. He shifted behind you and snaked his arm around you once more. He pushed your pelvis until you arched your back and a deep rumble rose from his chest. 

He poked between your legs, parting them as much as he could as your pants confined your thighs. He leaned into you and his cock prodded along your ass and he angled it lower. He spread your cunt with two fingers and blinding pressed himself against you, guiding his tip between to your entrance.

A chill went through you and your arms shot out. You tried to roll away from him and he pushed inside you all at once. You cried out and he grunted as he forced himself even deeper. You threw your head back as your body curved backwards and yet, there was more of him. You whimpered as he filled you completely. 

“I told you, honey,” He jerked his hips and you yelped. “You gotta be ready for me.”

He thrust, slowly. You murmured and slapped the floor with your palm. You were breathless, senseless as your walls clenched him hungrily. Your arm flew back and your fingers tangled in his thick hair. He drew his fingers back to your clit and teased you once more. The scent of his sweat and evergreen mingled and engulfed you as he grunted with each tilt of his hips.

“I didn’t think you could do it, honey,” He sped up. “I didn’t think you could take it all.” He rutted with dusky breaths in your ear. “Ah… you’re so fucking tight.”

You whimpered. He was so big it hurt and yet it was the type of pain that had you wanting. His fingers drove your hunger and you panted wildly as you closed your eyes and drowned in the delight. His warmth chased away the cold and you forgot where you were, who you were. There was only the twisting coil inside you.

He pounded into you harder and pathetic mewls tumbled from you. You clung to him tighter and his grunts punctuated each thrust. The wet sound of your cunt added to the lurid rhythm and your body quaked as you crept closer and closer to the edge.

“Cum for me,” He snarled in your ear. “Come on, I can feel it, honey. Cum--”

You cried out and your entire body shook as your nails grazed his scalp. Your orgasm was disorienting and left you dizzy as it turned to wispy murmurs. It only spurred him on. He crashed into you even hard as he brought his fingers to your lips and poked them inside your mouth. You sucked on his fingers and tasted yourself. It was sweet.

He turned you on your stomach and kept his motion as he lifted himself over you. He crushed you beneath him as his pelvis snapped down into you. His hand spread over your head as he held you down and his other arms pinned your shoulder. His grunt grew louder and louder as he hammered into you.

He moved your whole body as his thrusts turned frantic. You clawed at the duvet as your face was buried into the small pillow. You could barely catch your breath and you gave muffled whine as your hips and ass throbbed.

He planted his hands on either side of you and lifted himself as he slammed into you. He roared as you felt his release spill inside of you. He jerked into you harshly and impaled you completely. He stayed like that as he shuddered and eased himself down onto you. You turned your face out as you suffocated beneath his weight.

He inhaled your scent as he dragged his nose along your cheek.

“You should’ve stayed in the city, girl.” He wiggled his pelvis and you winced. “Where you belong.”

[katesattic]

Sanders Sides: Voices

So I do still want to post that Analysis video of the latest Sanders Sides episode but I am way to sick to think about editing right now, so I’m back to my preferred medium: writing.

I really want to talk about the different voices Thomas employs for his various characters (the Sides being the most prominent and recurring ones) and I kind of just glossed over it in the video I made. I said something like it was cool, considerable attention to detail, and making the characters feel unique. But I want to take the time to go more in-depth with it. So here I am, writing this on my phone to be drafted and spell-checked later.

A Nod to the Shorts

First things first, this is not something exclusive to the Sides. Thomas has pretty much been doing this since his start on Vine. Whether it was an impression or a nametag character (e.g. Sleep or Brain), Thomas has been employing this technique in some fashion. You wouldn’t confuse Moon for Sleep because they have very different vocal habits as well as personalities.

In his impressions, he would obviously be trying to imitate a certain voice. And he would do his best to match it. His Stewie is spot-on as is his Brian (but to be fair his natural speaking voice is very similar to Seth MacFarlane’s natural speaking voice). But you can also spot changes in his voice for his original characters. The theatric nature of his voice is probably most prominent in series such as Narrating People’s Lives and when he takes on the role of a film or radio announcer in his shorts. Tone and inflexion are also a very important aspect of misleading compliments. The variation and the patterns present in Thomas’s voice are vast in his catalogue of videos, but I want to focus on the Sides.

an aside: I don’t know what it is about the way Thomas portrays Sleep, but he reminds me of the sassy gay bestfriend from a 90s sitcom. {And that might make me love the character of Sleep even more.}

My True Self

By this point, the three characters had already appeared in Thomas’s Vines. Yet the differences in their voices aren’t really present yet. As Thomas previously said, Roman’s voice had already been developed by this time thanks to his princely role in Into the Woods. Roman was also a very prolific character in Thomas’s vines, which allowed Thomas more time to perfect his voice.

Logan and Patton however, had very similar voices. Neither was truly unique or as iconic as their present voices. Logan’s voice is the most drastically different of the three Sides introduced in this video. Between the two of them Patton’s voice was closer to how it currently sound, I think the main difference is that it’s gotten even more bubbly and energetic as time has gone on. Logan’s voice, however, was very similar to both Thomas’s and Patton’s. It’s less stoic and sardonic than the voice we’ve come to associate with him. The most I can really say about Logan’s voice during this time is that it was plain and kind of forgettable.

Taking on Anxiety

Virgil came into the series with an already defined voice. Granted it was a bit more ... villainous (for lack of a better word) in his introduction. But even if the cadences of his voice weren’t exactly the way we expect to see them today, his voice was distinct because of his attitude. He’s the sass and snark master, and able to give as much as he takes from Roman. They have a frenemies/good cop, bad cop relationship with each other. Maybe that’s what gives them great chemistry (romantic or not).  Note the subtle changes in Virgil’s voice when he speaks to the other Sides though. He’s softer with the other two, especially Patton. Even with Patton, there’s a certain roughness, or grainy quality, to his voice that I just love.

Jumping forward to “Can Lying Be Good?” you can very clearly see the changes in both Virgil’s voice and attitude when he’s talking to Deceit versus Patton.  There is obvious hostility in his voice when addressing Deceit. Virgil's voice wasn't hostile towards Roman in his early episodes, sure, there was banter, but there was never out-right loathing. 

Moving back to “Moving On”, in part two especially, Virgil’s voice comes off as almost demonic. Whether that is a result of another Side corrupting him or a moment of pure anxiety overcoming Thomas, is not for this analysis to discuss but I am curious to know if we’ll ever hear more of this voice (by Virgil or another Side).

A New Year of Lying to Myself ... in Song

Can you believe this is only the fourth video in the Sanders Sides series? And Logan was absent from the previous two. So let me just say that by this point, all the voices have been cemented. Logan is back, and so is the voice we’ve come to love. Sure, he doesn’t speak much. I mean most of this video is spent in song, but we do see certain qualities in Logan’s voice to which we’ve become accustomed.

Also, hey, I think this is the first video with all four of the main Sides together, so that’s awesome.

Moving On

I’d like to take the time here to go more into detail about Patton’s voice. I’ve gone into details with the other three, so allow me to go more in-depth here. 

While Patton’s voice was cemented well before this video, this is the first episode where we see a different side to Patton. We see his other emotions, not just the silly and happy feelings, but the sad and longing ones. We see Patton pining for Thomas’s lost love, and unable to move on from the break-up. And along with this new sad Patton, we get a new sound to his voice. The moment that sticks out to me the most is the moment where he pleads with Logan to stop. The pain in his voice is so real and just thinking about it is making me tear up a bit. Conversely, Patton’s voice also becomes overly silly during these moments of duress. Also rewatching this episode, I realise that there’s a certain Roman Quality to Patton’s voice. The slightest hint of a quasi-British accent, particularly when Patton's giving deep and insightful advice.

This whole analysis is less about what the Sides are saying than how they are saying it. And I don’t think there could be a more obvious example than this two-part episode. In preparation for this analysis I’ve been listening to the videos - not watching them - but listening to them. And just from listening, you can hear th hesitation in Patton’s voice when the time comes to enter his room.

I guess what I’m trying to say here is, that all you need is the audio and you can instantly differentiate the characters without even seeing their faces.

Can Lying Be Good?

No, no it cannot, but a new character with an amazingly distinct voice is. Deceit’s voice is incredible! Absolutely chilling! And I love it so much. I remember when ”Patton’s” voice changed, the first time I watched, when Deceit was revealed, I genuinely thought that it was being dubbed over the other character. Seriously, I just assumed one actor dubbed over the voice of another (similar to how Thomas dubs his voice over Joan’s while Roman has shapeshifted into Joan). It throws me every time I watch it. I assume it’s someone else’s voice rather than Thomas’s.

Additionally, when Deceit is disguised as Patton before he reveals himself, you can tell Patton’s voice is ... off. The first time you watch the episode, you can’t seem to tell what exactly is off about Patton. His voice is a strange mix between Patton’s eccentric vocal habits and Thomas’s natural speaking voice. I can’t be sure if this was a subconsious thing or a deliberate change Thomas made but it’s nuance is nothing shy of perfection.

The suspension of disbelief is so strong when it comes to the Sides that I genuinely forget that all these characters are being portrayed by the same gay (this was a typo, but I’m keeping it). And not only are all these characters, being portrayed by the same guy, they are also voiced by that same guy as well.

Sides Aside

Seriously, Sides aside, I love Thomas’s voice and headphones truly enhance all the minor features present within it. So here we go ...

THIS MAN IS A SIREN. You don’t have to experience sexual or romantic attraction to men to know that this man sings the siren’s song. I don't know how to adequately explain Thomas's voice. It's magic? It’s soft and low? There’s a gentle yet grainy element to his voice. I’m trying to come up with terms outside the scope of someone who’s interested in linguistics and phonology. And am really struggling to express how his voice sounds. Like, there’s something so comforting and soothing about his speaking voice, and his singing voice amplifies that tenfold.

OK, so I have this playlist of two songs ("The Things We USed to Share" and his cover of "Snow in Venice") which I just play on repeat the entire night ... what I'm trying to say is: I'm biased. My default to describing his voice is magical and comforting. I'm very fond of bass and baritone singers, and I absolutely love when they hit the low notes so  ... I'm biased. 

I guess the whole point of this analysis is for me to just talk in length about how amazingly talented this dude is.  He has an incredible vocal range, in both the acting and singing departments. His characters are distinct, in voice and personality and his humour is never lost, no matter how serious the topic. Long story short, this g(a/u)y's amazing, and I'm a fucking fangirl.

[blaksheepcreative]

Are Spelling and also Grammar Mistakes On Your Website Costing You Company?

Typos, spelling, and also grammatic mistakes: we have actually all found them on the web. Opportunities are, we have actually most likely even created them ourselves in client emails, our company social media sites posts, or on our company site.

Something is for certain: despite where you find them, meaning and also grammar mistakes are unprofessional. To make issues worse, they are most likely shedding you consumers, harming your brand name, and also damaging your internet site's ranking in internet search engine (SEO).

Today we'll talk about why you need to keep your website and electronic possessions tidy and error-free to attain the most effective outcomes.

Poor grammar triggers you to shed reliability and also opportunities.

Right here's a statement that I wager you won't be surprised by.

Poor grammar and also punctuation are less than professional.

What you may be surprised by, nonetheless, is the effects of bad punctuation and also grammar.

First, let's speak about offline.

Poor punctuation and also grammar can cost you:

Job chances

It's proven that companies will not offer you a second thought if your return to has lots of mistakes.

In an interview with the Harvard Organization Evaluation, Kyle Wiens, the CEO of iFixit, clarified why he wouldn't hire people who utilize poor grammar.

Promos at the workplace

According to a 2013 study of LinkedIn profiles by leading to masterminds at Grammarly, professionals with less grammar errors in their accounts tend to attain higher settings in the workplace.

Days

No, not like January 13, 2021. We're talking about the other type of dates.

" A research study of online daters in the Netherlands has actually found that spelling blunders in a dating profile, such as creating "the" for "the" or utilizing iRRegulaR CapS, are viewed as signals of sloppiness or lack of treatment, which consequently impacts the profile owner's perceived beauty." - Source: The Guardian.

Poor punctuation and also grammar can cost your organization:

Credibility

Poor punctuation and also grammar on your site can trigger would-be clients to lose faith in your brand.

Think of it.

What's your impression when you see a company's web site to discover it full of typographical, punctuation, or grammatical errors?

If you resemble the vast majority of people, you're likely to disregard that website (as well as business) as well as proceed to the next one, which can be devastating for the company's lasting survival.

Below's an amusing details:

The White House press workplace misspelled the name of British Head of state Theresa Might three times, with one such mistake referencing a "bilateral meeting" between Trump and "Teresa May."

But ...

Teresa Might is also the name of a British previous soft porn starlet and design. Speak about a huge oops.

Do you see exactly how an easy typo can alter the entire meaning of something, creating your reputation to drop?

Earnings

There is a proven correlation in between internet blunders and shed company.

In 2019, Web site World ran an A/B split test with 2 similar touchdown pages. One page had spotless grammar, as well as the various other had several punctuation mistakes. The research found that:

The mistake-riddled website shed over two times the number of possible consumers than the typo-free page.

Time invested in the page with punctuation and grammatic mistakes was eight percent less than site visitors' time invested in the error-free web page.

The searchings for of the Web site Planet research confirmed previous research study executed by Charles Dunscombe, a serial entrepreneur.

In a BBC interview in 2011, Dunscombe attributed a solitary spelling error on a web page of his website tightsplease.co.uk to cutting the value of sales per site visitor nearly in half.

Correct spelling as well as grammar are vital!

You could too presume that customers will certainly lose rely on you as well as your brand name if the material on your website is anything less than best.

How do spelling as well as grammar errors affect your internet site's SEO?

Just as in the real world, blunders on your internet site have effects. Not just can they cost you site visitors and also engagement, but they can also be unsafe to your site's Search Engine Optimization (SEO).

To place it in nonprofessional's terms, spelling errors can cause you to shed page rank and obtain vanquish in online search engine results pages by your competition.

So, just how do errors harm your Search Engine Optimization?

Lower Dwell Time

One of the aspects that Google and various other online search engine use in ranking sites is the amount of time visitors spend on a web site and which pages they go to.

If a visitor's time is short, search engines think that the site visitor really did not locate what they were trying to find, causing your positions for the search term that they entered to find you to slip.

Or, search engines might compose your website off as being undependable or of poor quality.

In any case, a decrease in position will cause less website traffic to your site, which impacts your bottom line.

Higher Bounce Fees

Site Planet's research study additionally provided some understandings into the effect of high bounce prices.

" Bouncing" is when an individual goes to a page on your website and also leaves without seeing any other web pages.

WP's study tracked greater than 5,000 site sees over 2 weeks and also discovered that the bounce rate on landing web pages with poor spelling as well as grammar mored than 85 percent higher than those that were correctly-written and also free of punctuation as well as grammar errors.

High bounce rates damage your SEO and ranking since they signify to Google that your site isn't trustworthy or doesn't match the search query, as we discussed above.

Low dwell time as well as high bounce rates are bad for your site's setting in organic search results.

Internet site World's study likewise gave insights into the result of high bounce rates. Tracking more than 5,000 site check outs over 2 weeks, they discovered that the bounce rate on touchdown web pages with careless spelling and grammar was 85 percent greater than those that were properly composed as well as spell-checked. This is further damaging to your SEO ranking, as high bounce rates signal to Google that a website is not trustworthy, therefore lowering its placement in the natural search results.

Poor Individual Experience

Google and also various other online search engine' spiders can not identify if a web site is aesthetically attractive, easy to use, stylish, etc

. They aren't able to adapt a user's viewpoint, nonetheless ...

They make use of signals from the website's traffic to calculate whether site visitors have a favorable or negative experience on your site.

If customers aren't hanging around and also browsing your internet site, Google takes that as a sign that you're not supplying a good user experience, as well as, you guessed it, your rankings suffer.

Right here's what SEO Guru Matt Cutts (and also former head of web designer spam with Google) needs to say:

https://youtu.be/qoFf6Kn4K98

How does Google distinguish exceptional the excellent grammar and also spelling from the bad?

What's fascinating is that spelling and also grammar aren't thought about straight ranking factors with Google.

Nonetheless, the relationship in between search engine ranking as well as inadequate punctuation and grammar can be nailed down to:

Visitor experience: As we said previously, your dwell time and bounce rates directly impact your search engines' rankings. More typos and punctuation errors = much less dwell time as well as a greater bounce rate.

Backlinks: Hyperlinks from websites to yours are thought about a substantial ranking aspect with Google as well as other internet search engine.

People are much less prone to connect to poorly-worded content than trusted sources. Spelling mistakes and typos can trigger you to lose out on backlinks and also traffic from other sites.

6 Straightforward Actions to Make Your Web Site Devoid Of Punctuation and also Grammar Errors:

For your site to help you reach your marketing objectives, it needs to draw customers in and also not drive them away.

You've striven on your online visibility, so do not let poor grammar as well as spelling destroy it for you! Below are some excellent habits to exercise to guarantee your material and post are error-free and attracts (as opposed to repels) visitors:

Proofread, proofread, proofread

Before you hit the message button, it's an excellent idea to check (as well as recheck) every one of your web content prior to publishing it. Good quality web content can not be rushed!

Always enable added time at the end of your contacting check your work for errors.

Review your web content aloud.

This may appear a little ridiculous, however believe me - it works! Reviewing your work out loud pressures you to decrease and permits you to select mistakes.

If something doesn't sound appropriate or appears awkward, then reword it.

Serve the searcher!

Have a person check it for you

When possible, have a grammatically-savvy close friend or coworker read over your rough draft. 4 eyes are far better than two.

If you've been pecking away at the same section of text all day, the words will certainly all run together. Even the sharpest proofreader can miss things that a fresh set of eyes won't. Ask a buddy or staff member to check your content.

Utilize an on the internet spelling as well as grammar tool.

There are ratings of tools online (both totally free as well as costs) that you can make use of to check your punctuation as well as grammar to prevent seeming like a fool.

Here at BlakSheep Creative, we run every piece of web content via Grammarly, which is an amazing asset.

You can utilize others, however we promise, if you utilize Grammarly when, you will not also remember their names, so we will not also mention them.

Do not downplay social media.

Although social media systems tend to have an even more easygoing messaging style (and scores of unnecessary emojis as well as abbreviations), do not overcome loosened up. Do not presume that just because they are more casual than punctuation and grammar mistakes are ALRIGHT.

By entering the routine of checking every one of your digital web content, you'll be more susceptible to detect blunders irrespective of the platform.

Hire a specialist copywriter

A site filled with spelling as well as grammar mistakes will certainly threaten every one of your marketing initiatives and efforts to develop your business as experts in your industry.

If grammar as well as spelling aren't your specialty', after that consider employing a specialist copywriter to produce your content for you. By working with an expert, you can have count on your internet content that it will do what you have it for, and that's sales.

The return on investment (ROI) is higher than you may think if it indicates you are maintaining site visitors and also converting them to consumers (or clients).

Takeaways

Spelling and also grammatic errors have happened to everyone; we're human! But, by getting involved in a behavior of proofreading prior to you struck the message button, you can increase your web site's user experience, SEO position, and conversion prices.

Our team believe in spelling and also grammar a lot, we're providing a FREE website audit. We will inspect your whole website and also supply you a spreadsheet of the spelling and grammar errors, the page they're located on, and recommended solutions for FREE.

No strings. No dedications.

email us at seo@blaksheepcreative.com

[sourwolfstories]

what r some good long sterek fics pls help

Indelible Marks by billtheradish

The house never burned. The pack is strong. Derek will never need to be the alpha, and his sister is a troll. (Actually, most of his family is like that.)

Derek is an apprentice tattoo artist, and Stiles isn’t old enough to get ink of his own yet. But that doesn’t stop him from being interesting…

(This story is now out of buffer, but I will always announce when the next update will be, and am trying to keep to a regular posting schedule. Also, please be advised that this is essentially a rough draft. That doesn’t mean it’s riddled with typos, every chapter is edited, just that the overarching plot and side stories haven’t had a chance to be edited in full yet–but they will be. An edited version of this story will be posted eventually, so if the current length isn’t your cup of tea, just come back later.)

Home by TheTypewriterGirl

January seventh. Seven days since the start of 2015, and seven days since his father’s death.

The bastard, he thinks bitterly. The past year Derek Hale had made it blatantly obvious that he hated his scrawny guts, taking every given opportunity to shove him up against a wall, growl threats in his ears and roll his eyes whenever he stepped into the room, muttering some snide comment about how spastic or idiotic he was.

So why did he fucking volunteer to take him in?

Put Down in Words by paintedrecs

“Oh,” Stiles said, his voice coming out low and breathy, “fuck me.”

“I don’t think that’s on the syllabus, but we can check to see if there’s a spot open in any of his classes,” Scott said, grinning.

“This isn’t an actual professor, though,” Stiles insisted, unable to resist brushing his thumb over the sharp line of the man’s bearded jaw. He was laughing at something off-camera, the shot taken in three-quarters view, his coat collar casually rumpled and opened to reveal a sliver of a simple grey t-shirt. The whole thing was deliberately calculated to lend him a more accessible feel, and god help him, Stiles was falling for it.

*

When Stiles signed up for Dr. Hale’s intro to history class, he had two goals: knock out the credits his advisor was bugging him to complete before he graduated, and spend a few hours a week daydreaming about his sexy professor’s salt and pepper beard.

Derek, a few months away from turning forty and not sure when his life had started feeling so damn lonely, had never encountered someone like Stiles before. Bright-eyed, sharp-tongued, determined to throw Derek’s carefully cultivated world into disarray…and absolutely the last person Derek should be falling in love with.

Hallowed Grounds by damnfancyscotch

Everything in Beacon Hills is the same when Stiles comes home from college.

Well, except for the fact that he’s a published author now, Scott is halfway across the world with a travelling circus, Erica’s epilepsy has been cured, her boss offers him a job too, and there’s this weird black dog that seems to be following him around just to judge him.

Oh, and the murders, of course.

But other than that stuff… totally the same old BH.

The Boy and the Beast by Dira Sudis

In which events in Beacon Hills go rather differently from the start, and a Beauty and the Beast (ish) story ensues. (Scott is not a teacup and no one sings about their feelings.)

Love Thy Neighbor…He’s Hot by Triangulum

Derek and Laura seriously lucked out with Stiles as their neighbor. Yeah he can be loud, but he keeps it to normal hours, and he brings them food, they have movie nights, he’s so beautiful, and okay, Derek might be pining. The only problem is, Stiles has a girlfriend. And Derek HATES her.

OR

The one where Derek and Laura live next door to Stiles, and Derek has a completely out of control crush. A Sterek as neighbors one shot AU that got wildly out of control.

The Hollow Moon by thepsychicclam

It’s the summer after Stiles’ first year of college, and he’s working a crappy job and dealing with nightmares and anxiety - but he’s okay, he swears. He makes it through most days without too much trouble. Then, a certain werewolf comes back into town. Which Stiles doesn’t care about, nope, not at all.

After two and a half years, Derek returns to Beacon Hills with his small Pack. Though he tried to move on, something just kept drawing him back to Beacon Hills, he’s just not sure what. Now, he figures he can start building something like a life - but he keeps getting distracted by Stiles Stilinski of all people.

Permanent Fixture by linksofmemories

Derek is Scott’s older brother. Stiles is Scott’s best friend. Derek is falling in love with Stiles. This is a bit of a problem.

Wild Horses by thepsychicclam

Derek’s a drifter with no home, no destination, and no will to live. Stiles works on his family’s failing cattle and horse ranch while all his friends are going off to college. When Derek falls asleep in a random barn, exhausted and half-starved, he doesn’t expect to wake up on the other end of the sheriff’s shotgun. And Stiles sure as hell doesn’t expect his dad to invite the drifter in for breakfast.

Play Crack the Sky by WeAreTheCyclones

Excerpt from “Hale Pulls the Plug on the Future of Rock,” Rolling Stone, Issue 1203 – Oct. 2014“Fans and music industry vets alike are left reeling in the wake of bassist Derek Hale’s sudden departure from Smokes for Harris. At a time when the foursome from Beacon Hills, California seems to be on the cusp of rock superstardom after just one double platinum record, Smokes has everything to lose.”

Excerpt from “Smokes for Harris: Gladiator,” SPIN.com – Feb. 2015“Smokes for Harris gives in a little to the pop punk of yesteryear in their sophomore effort, but rather than pandering to fans of a lost era they elevate the genre in a way that hasn’t been seen in quite some time. Frontman Stiles Stilinski works double duty as singer and primary songwriter and proves that he can handle the task even without former bassist Derek Hale.“

Three Marks by sanam

"And then there was pain again, but this time it was in only three places—his arm, below his clavicle, and next to his heart, all on the left side. It felt like the skin was being sliced apart, ripped open, flayed off—And suddenly it was done.Derek looked across the room and saw the boy on the floor, looking about as bad as Derek felt.”

Derek and Stiles learn that bonding is probably best done with ridiculous amounts of video games and maybe a little bit of time.

Windows by dr_girlfriend

Derek has a new neighbor who won’t stop looking.

Excerpt:

“You’re blind,” Derek said flatly, the anger draining from him so suddenly he felt almost woozy. His vision cleared, his claws sliding back into blunt fingernails.

“Thanks for the memo, genius,” the kid said acidly. “I can still fucking defend myself, so don’t take another damn step.”

“Fuck, I…I’m sorry,” Derek stuttered.

“What?!” The kid’s brow crinkled. “I mean — what?! You’re fucking sorry!?” His lips thinned into a harsh line. “What, is this some kinda Hallmark movie where you’re discovering the error of your ways because you don’t want to rob a blind person?! That’s fucking condescending, man. I’ll have you know that —”

“Just, wait.” Derek interrupted what was apparently the start of a convincing argument as to why he should rob the kid after all, feeling his head start to spin. “This is — it’s a misunderstanding. I’m — I’m not robbing you. You’re — you’re safe, okay? I’m taking three steps back. Just — just let me explain.”

“Explain why you came busting into my apartment? Yeah, go right ahead, man, I can’t wait to hear this epic tale.”

Gravity’s Got Nothing on You by zosofi

“Three weeks,” Derek says.

“Still don’t want to,” Stiles says.

“I’ll pay you,” Derek says, and that… that has Stiles interested. Alf’s Antique’s may be a great job, but it’s not a high-paying job, and half of Stiles’s tuition is coming from financial aid, so…

“How much,” Stiles asks, “are we talking here? Because I know your family, dude. And it’ll be kind of awkward after.“

“My family thinks you’re some sort of fucking gift to the world,” Derek seethes, like he’s jealous, “they’ll probably be pissed at me when we break it off, so don’t worry about that. Five hundred bucks.”

“A thousand,” Stiles says, because screw ethics. Also, the Hale family is loaded. Derek can deal.

Dating Backwards by RemainNameless

Pornstars Derek and Stiles work for the same company. Derek only shoots with werewolves and Stiles only shoots with humans. That’s not going to change after they meet. It’s really not.(It might.)

Didn’t See That Coming by knittersrevolt

Stiles leaves Beacon Hills in the dust after he catches his husband cheating on him.

He finds his way to New York where he starts working for the Hale House Nursery, accidentally adopts a werewolf baby (through no fault of his own thank-you-very-much), and somehow starts training to be an Exorcist Emissary. So, in general, life was going good.

Then he hears that demons have found their way into his hometown. Can he face his inner demons and go back to save the day?

No Homo by RemainNameless

Stiles’ sophomore year starts something like this:3 FourLokos+ 1 peer-pressuring cat- 1 best bro to end all best bros= 1 Craigslist ad headline that reads “str8 dude - m4m - strictly platonic”.Derek is the fool who replies.

There’s Monsters at Home by calrissian18

“How did you get past the wards?” Derek had put them up, with Peter’s grudging assistance, after the Alpha pack had made themselves at home a few times too many.

The guy pulled a face. “You mean the wards a five-year-old girl with the mental ability of a goldfish could deconstruct?” He blinked wide eyes at Derek. “Gee, I don’t know. It’s bound to go down as one of life’s great mysteries.”

Derek despised him.

Prince Among Wolves by tylerfucklin

Looking for full day/evening sitter. 2 twin boys age 4. Must have exp. w/werewolves. Must be human. No pedophiles. No teenage girls. Pay negotiable.

Between Men and Lions by standinginanicedress

“I thought we could be friends,” Derek offers, to which Stiles gets an odd smile on his face.

“Friends,” he repeats, an odd inflection.

“Yes, friends.”

Stiles laughs, just barely. It’s more of an exhalation of breath than it is genuine mirth or anything else, and then he smiles. “I’m pretty good at friends,” he says with a tilt to his head, and Derek clears his throat and has to look away.

What’s Best For Everyone, Isn’t What’s Easy by gatergirl79

Derek is gone and Stiles is left holding the baby…well, a cheery three year old named Leah actually. While Derek searches for her mom, Stiles plays daddy. When the sour-alpha wolf returns with his ex in toe, things get strained between Stiles and Derek. Especially now that’s they’ve realized just what they mean to each other