#not even a message to go with it
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There's nothing like sitting in an empty google meet only to receive an email 10 minutes in that the time has been changed 🙃
#my post#not even a message to go with it#im sick and fucking tired of having to go through this convoluted game of telephone trying to get any amount of leave pay#always 2-3 layers removed from the actual information i need and nobody fucking gets back to me#and now im being bugged for details on my application that i dont fucking have because nobody will tell me anything or sign the damn papers
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how am I supposed to be friends with everyone in the world when there's such little time to talk to them all
#/hj#tbh though i see my mutuals interacting and doing fun stuff together and i go. man. wish i could do that.#and I haven't even gotten to catch up on messages Dms and mentions#but I have the Obligations Required Of Me#sara shush
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j… jesus oppa ;____;
#ashsksjsks jesus k-idol era… and when he does his comeback stage…..???#i just want you to know the last thing i saw before my plane took off was an “i’m going to jesus cafe” message from my grandma#and the first thing i saw when i landed fifteen hours later yesterday was 130+ unread messages on kakaotalk#and i opened it and most of it was cutesy photos my grandma had sent me of her and white jesus#also: she is not even christian…. her friends were like wanna come and she was just like WHY NOT?#also… if you’re interested… in japan there’s a manga called 聖☆おにいさん (translated as ‘saint young men’)#which focuses on the lives of roomates jesus and buddha#(also there are fancomics based on this… including. of course. jesus/judas)#christmas
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on a completely separate note; shizun luo binghe with a disciple shen yuan who fell into the abyss??? *thinks about LBH canonically stealing SQQ's corpse for 5 years* he'd hallucinate i think. like, like visual and audial hallucinations.
Keeps thinking he's seeing SQQ in the corner of his eyes, or wandering between the trees, amongst a group of disciples. Thinks he hears him calling for him, but its just the wind or another disciple.
Gets Xiu Ya reforged but patently fucking refuses to make a sword mound. Because his disciple Is Not Dead :))) There was No Body. He's Not Dead. And If You keep Insisting That He Is, He's Gonna Skewer You :). He's holding onto Xiu Ya so he can return his most favored disciple's sword when he returns. It's on his hip right next to Zheng Yang where it's supposed to be.
Also this motherfucker?? does not sleep btw. He has the image of SQQ, wide eyed and hysterical and standing at the mouth of the abyss burned into his fucking eyelids. Can't use the dreamscape to escape it either because he keeps trying to save him and either he does and it's an incredibly cruel trick to wake up to, or he doesn't and he gets his heart broken in several different pieces again.
There is no convincing this man that Shen Qingqiu is dead. Absolutely nothing at all. He is buried so deep in denial that moles would be jealous of how deep he is. He keeps making tea for two in the bamboo house only to remember that it's just him. SQQ's fans are hiding everywhere, little reminders of his presence. He goes to wake up SQQ on the mornings he sleeps in-- only to find the room empty.
#svsss#luo binghe#svsss au#scum villain#scum villian self saving system#shen yuan#shen qingqiu#disciple shen yuan#lbh. visibly exhausted and with twitchy eyes: im fine :) | everyone else: ho no the fuck you ARENT.#SQQ was hysterical not because he found out LBH was half-demon but bc he was having a long-awaited mental breakdown over his autonomy :)#or (limited) lack thereof. he was having a sudden onset crisis of mortality and was handling at quite literally the WORST time. oops#im thinking very hard that LBH would never push his disciple into the abyss especially with no system to force him to. so SQQ either#had to goad him into it (failing always) or throw himself in. he ended up doing it himself but not before some very impressive hysterics.#BUT ALSO. IF THIS HAD BEEN WHERE SQQ WAS THE HALF-HEAVENLY DEMON INSTEAD IT WOULD'VE BEEN SO GREAT.#and by great i mean horribly angsty bc SQQ is NOT doing too hot and has. in very SY-like fashion. convinced himself that LBH will kill him#when he finds out he's a demon. so when it comes out i have this mental image of him lunging at LBH and LBH flinches back. but SQQ wraps hi#hands around the blade of Zheng Yang and yanks it up so the tip of the blade is digging into his chest where is heart is. LBH can't yank th#sword away without risking slicing into SQQ's hands. SQQ's hair has fallen out of its tail/bun and is now messily spilling down his#back and its NO helping the kinda deranged look he has going on. he's visibly shaking and his eyes keep flittering away and back at LBH's#face. SQQ is looking at the messages from the system warning him that he has to go into the abyss or punishment will occur. he's like.#rambling though. talking about how shizun doesn't *like* unclean things and there is nothing more unclean than a demon. like he is#INSISTING. LBH can't?? get a fucking word in. actually. SY isn't listening that much either anyways. too overwhelmed with the system and#the amount of stress he's under and his crumbling mental state and the innate and primal desire to live even when he's standing in front of#his own executioner. it all ends with him sitting on the ground at the lip of the abyss with his hair falling in his face. he looks so#unkempt and fallen apart and so distinctly *non-Shen Qingqiu* that LBH feels physically ill over it. tears are streaming down SQQ's face#and despite everything he is smiling. its not a nice smile. its a very frayed falling apart at the seams about to crack smile.#he tells shizun not to worry about staining his blade with this disciple's filthy blood because this disciple will take care of it himself.#and then he falls into the abyss before luo binghe can so much as grab him. the only reason LBh doesn't literally jump in after him is bc#he was numb with shock and the abyss was already closed before he could feel his legs again :]
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cassian "the only special thing about me is luck, and i've overplayed my hand already" andor getting out of every impossible situation he's ever been in and finally running out of luck on scarif. i need a minute.
#andor when it comes to making cassian even more doomed by the narrative#i just know everyone who knows cassian saw what was going on and was telling themselves “andor always makes it out” while he was on scarif#because they know he has insane luck and manages to make it everytime. but he's finally run out now that he's delivered the message#star wars#andor#andor season 2#andor spoilers#cassian andor
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so uhhhhhhhh. not to be cryptic and bitchy on main but congratulations to everyone in my messages for like 5 months on being right i guess
#ramble#ughhhhhhhhhhhh ok so#i will delete this later bc idk if this person has tumblr and i genuinely mean no ill will i just need an outside opinion#i vented about it on my close friends story already but i need like. a neutral party#i won't say their name but if you're on other socials you probably know who it is#basically for a while i've been getting messages saying 'this person has hacked your art style' or 'is REDACTED your alt account'#and in the beginning there were like. similarities? but nothing i could really claim and also i don't want to accuse someone of theft#like i don't own any stylistic choices or anything. i've used things from other artists i like. honestly it's kind of flattering#and we are actually really friendly in DMs now and we even joke about it. we message eachother any time we get a comment about it#i made a joke literally 2 weeks ago about how we're two different people i swear#but after adding some Very specific things to my art (like the paper texture/hatching/shiny lighting). they also added them#and i gave them the benefit of the doubt bc i don't like to believe anyone has bad intent with stuff like that. and i've done the same obvs#but recently they dropped some tav lore and it was. basically a panel for panel copy of one of my cyra comics down to the HAND PLACEMENT#and obviously i don't own the Bitch Mother trope or anything but it's just. mmmmm it makes me feel weird#idk it just feels like it's gone a bit far now and i'm not sure what to do about it#like you would think after we became moots they would get scared and stop but i think i was too openly trusting and they just kept going#recently someone on THEIR PATREON thought they were me and they weren't even one of mine (which by itself is funny but. y'know)#i don't want to call anyone out or upset anyone bc it only causes more problems but like. i Know. and idk if they should know that i know#maybe i'm just stupid idk i really trusted that it wasn't happening but it is and i don't know how to feel#hONESTLY I'M JUST MAD THAT I CAN'T DO ANY MORE CYRA LORE NOW BC PEOPLE ARE GOING TO ACCUSE **ME**#also PLEASE do not witch hunt this person i want to deal with this as quietly as possible#i really felt like i was in the twilight zone or just being paranoid so i had to ask
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my life a movie (PSYCHOLOGICAL HORROR)
#when i die imma go to adhd heaven 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#★ my art#art#dandys world#dandy’s world#dandys world astro#dandys world goob#dandys world toodles#dandys world oc#★ arin rambles#Literally ive only gotten twisted astro 2 times in my life and both of them ended in tragedy#the first one was a blackout So i died (i suck at blackouts) i didnt even see him i almost cried#the second one……. Well…. i was in a game w my bestie and some random rodger#and he goes in chat#‘its astro. be careful on that machine’ BOY I READ THAT MESSAGE IN CHAT AND FUMBLED SO BAD#I MESSED UP THE CALLIBRATION AND SHRIMPO FOUND ME. I GOT BODIED. JUMPED. ATTACKED.#I DIDNT EVEN GET TO LOOK AT HIMMMMMM 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#my bestie let me spectate her getting chased by him so i was in adhd heaven but Man i was so mad.#i fumbled so hard im so embarrassing i was SO HAPPY when i saw it was astro I COULDNT FOCUS ON ANYTHIGN#i always add goob Somwhere in my doodles#Hi Goob !!!!!!!!
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With the end of season two comes a second redraw!
[Nov 2022] [June 2023] [June 2024]
#better drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan wangji#I was really looking forwards to this redraw - though the jump in skill isn't as dramatic as the last one I still am proud of my progress!#It's really incredible to look back on this last year and how much has happened since then.#Both in my personal life and this blog.#I started the second season while I was going through some pretty rough times and it truly kept my sanity afloat.#I challenged myself a lot more this year! And while it didn't always turn out the way I hoped-#-being messy and earnestly trying to do something different has been my favourite part of art.#There will always be a lot of room to grow - I don't think art and creativity has a ceiling.#I went from doubting that I was even an artist to joining a gamedev team as the lead artist! That's character growth!#Thank you all once again for joining me on this journey B*)#Thank you for all the messages and support you have sent my way these last 18 months.#I'm so happy to have been given the chance to create something for this community. You've given me so much and I am so grateful.#I'll take a little break to post some personal project stuff this week and resume season three after that!#Onwards to another season of silly (and sometimes serious) comics!
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『 “i like you're so kindness, too” – oscar piastri about lando norris (2025) 』












#made this post bc i needed to have smiley lando on here and address some things in the tags.#and im putting this in the tags bc they dont even deserve a full post.#but if you send me anon messages about lando that are genuinely disg.usting im just gonna delete that bs#like. youre on a landoscar page. what makes you think that i want to see those takes on lando?#and if youre gonna spread those takes then at least stop being a fucking pussy and do it off of anon how about that huh#like u dont have to like or support all drivers but you also dont have to go on to a page that clearly does support said driver and send in#anon hat.e. grow the fuck up. learn some basic human decency.#also this isnt even abt whats going today and the messages ive gotten from that.. like ive gotten a good handful abt lando in the past#and they were genuinely disg.usting.#i support both lando and oscar. if you dont then stop lurking in the tags. stop visiting pages that do. stop spreading your comments.#sorry for the rant in the tags but i needed this somewhere.#lando norris#oscar piastri#landoscar#f1#mclaren#comp
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Mood
#destiny#destiny 2#destiny the game#my art#traditional art#timur#lord timur#colovance#little colovance 🥺#meme redraw#going through some Tough Stuff so excuse me if i'm even less talkative than usual#i appreciate your messages and comments a lot though and it's always a joy to read!! 🥺💙
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hey just for my fellow artists out there:
i noticed lately that tumblr's been getting similar scam bots to instagram, which i've like...never noticed before in all my years of posting. which sucks because i mean, one, they're annoying (you can at least farm some types of them on instagram for engagement, here they're just annoying) and two, because people who only post here aren't familiar with them, people are going to get scammed which sucks
so just a quick psa: if you post some art with tags that lead back to like typical art buzzwords (anything mentioning art, for example), you might get a pretty immediate notification that someone's replied or sent you an ask. usually they say they want a commission and to continue the conversation elsewhere (messages, for example). they don't want a commission, they want to scam you via paypal or something like that.
stay alert, don't get scammed
#fab talks#fabtalks#i know its tempting#we all would like some extra cash#but my rule of thumb is if a person can't bother to like any of my posts (they usually don't before messaging) or like follow me#they cannot possibly like my art enough for a commission they have to be a bot#an actual client even one who sees your art and immediately thinks 'oh they'd work perfect for a project i have in mind' is going to#engage with your work a bit more and probably follow you not just write in your replies 'DO YOU HAVE COMMISSIONS DM ME'
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weekly navel-gazing update: this week is most consequential event in long time. keyword search: "scared" "is it ok to be scared" "beaten and tortured by the ogre"




#old director of south asian studies just talked to me to let me know theyll be joining me to sit on my panel while i present two projects#in two days and intimated they could discuss supervising potential grad work or dissertations despite funding freezes#she is respected used to do the gender studies program coordinating too#and their TA PhD student super severe standoffish goth walked up to me in front of seminar to thank me for my portfolio of essays#on poverty homelessness and environmental stuff and said it was TOUCHING and i should be proud and shell also be attending#after the director of student research invited them#and research director happens to specialize in borderlands and caribbean and empire and she emailed me to say#she left me a signed copy of her book with a really lovely message#and a protein bar because she knows i have diabetes and other illnesses but bike like ten miles a day between work and school#and then she emailed me and offered car ride if i wanted#and i was touched and surprised and now im like uh oh this is important i guess#and like uh oh i really shouldve taken the week off work or something why am i working forty hours for this#well precarious rent i guess but still wish i hadnt spent past four months just going to retail job and had instead hung out more with#faculty and hope i didnt waste my chance to get to know them#also is im just going to wear that outfit to conference hope not perceived as too informal#no family whatsoever so there was no one like interested or checking in on me to like help me see that the developments were significant#a year ago i was nothing but nightshift retail with NO prospects and rapidly worsening health#and there wasnt even a glimmer of hope for possibility of positive social environment let alone school
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my queens <3 arya, sansa, & dany
ok before this starts controversy the crowns were so fucking random you have no idea. dany's is just the classic, arya's is a lineup of wolf teeth bc why not, sansa's is intended to be a wolf face with wings lol. pls dont ascribe secret hidden meanings to the crowns bc there is none i have no agenda and 0 horses in this race. i chose for aesthetics not for fandom discourse propaganda
anyways i love all 3 of these girls and it was fun to draw them older than their canon ages :)
#i now realize in hindsight the crowns could be giving the wrong message but there is no message... sorry#(that isnt meant to be a qitn crown and that isnt meant to be a eyrie crown AT ALL)#(i dont see sansa as lady of the eyrie personally)#(qitn predictions i would not discuss even if my life was at stake)#valyrianscrolls#valyrian scrolls#sansa stark#arya stark#daenerys targaryen#asoiaf#asoiaf fanart#sansa stark fanart#daenerys stormborn#arya stark fanart#if i get hate bc of this i will genuinely livepost my mental breakdown#i am going THRU it irl i cannot handle more turmoil. LEAVE ME ALONEEEE#also i accidentally made aryas face disproportionate but. i couldnt fix it. so im rlly sad. pls ignore it#asoiaf art#stark sisters#some requests will be finished soonish btw im just struggling w drawing ships in cute poses lol#and as far as what they are intended to be the queens *of* here. idk. queens of my heart.
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If she does get cast, then it's obvious the show isn't about adapting Narnia--it's about The Message. And honestly what better way of driving that Message home than by basterdizing a Christian story.
Cos Christianity is the antithesis of the Liberal modern media Message. Its about self sacrifice instead of self-centeredness. It's about finding identity in Christ, instead of in ourselves and our actions. It's about worship of God, not worship of Me. Its about freedom through obedience, not freedom through doing whatever you want. It's about The Truth.
Taking a preexisting, loved story as a vessel of The Message is common these days with all the reboot remake live action culture. Taking a preexisting, loved Christian story pushes The Message even more and has the additional 'benefit' of attacking directly at the enemy of The Message.
But Christ has already won, and every act against Him and His people and the beautiful art of His followers are just the devil throwing a tantrum and ruining what is good because he can't win.
#wren rambles#narnia#main tagging cos im in a argumentative mood lets go#netflix narnia#the lion the witch and the wardrobe#magician's nephew#i think thats the first one being adaptwd#tbh the fact that theyre even in discussions with female actors indicates they dont care about the story itself#just about the Message they can push with it
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#jumblr#jewish politics#antisemitism tw#personal thoughts tag#brought to you by me going to shel silverstein's wikipedia page#and subsequently being disappointed by yet another article about a person starting with 'born to a jewish family'#you will not die if you say 'this person was jewish and their family was as well!' i promise#recognizing that some people you like or were famous are jews is not a bad thing#jew isn't a bad word. being a jew is not a curse and refusing to even recognize that someone is jewish sends way worse a message#but i was obsessed with shel silverstein's poetry as a kid#which it feels like everything i loved as a kid and now being jewish at a rate higher than chance was an Early Sign lmao
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Something something tim drake who has never been put first by anyone he's ever loved in his life being told he is not only kon's first but also his only robin..... for the only thing that kon cared abt to be the fact that tim felt wanted and treasured and important to someone....., that he didn't give a damn about how other ppl might feel about what he just said....... esp knowing that he literally had his home and title and dad ripped from him in the last year......
#timkon#kontim#tim drake#kon el#timothy drake#robin#red robin#teen titans comics#dc comics#conner kent#much as im all for socializing damian#sending him to the titans was some bs#theyre all like 5 years older than him at least first of all so they r not peers in that sense#like a 17 year old is not gonna be pals w a 12 year old#second they r all tims friends. who he just recently tried to kill. so thats a FANTASTIC first impression#and he doesnt respect people so cassie being lead? that was gonna go great#rose and him got on p ok but even she's closer to tim#no wonder he was like no thanks#but beyond all of that imagine the message that sent to tim???#'i dont want u and i'll bet ur friends r cool with you being replaced too'#i was so glad kon said smn tbh#superboy
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