Hey if you're a white person (as I am too!) and reading the stuff about End OTW Racism (@end-otw-racism) is making you uncomfortable CONGRATULATIONS THATS THE POINT bipoc have been uncomfortable in fandom for decades and some of yall can't face being uncomfortable for five seconds and still have the gall to have shit like BLM in your descriptions.
Put your money where your mouth is. Be uncomfortable. Actually read what they're talking about and what changes they're proposing instead of jumping right to BuT wHaT aBoUt My DaRk FiC (they want to protect your dark fic and help ensure you're safer from harassment over it!)and ThEy'Re PrO-cEnSoRsHiP (they are explicitly not).
I'm so fucking tired of having my posts and those I reblog on this topic largely ignored on my personal account, but ESPECIALLY I'm furious about how ignored posts on racism in fandom are when I put them on the danmei art sideblogs.
I see racism every single fucking DAY as part of running those accounts. This isn't some nebulous thing happening elsewhere, this is us!
If you don't care, I really need you to take a long hard look in the mirror and ask yourself WHY DONT I CARE?
Because YOU SHOULD FUCKING CARE.
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So, for context, I need to learn photoshop for class. Cuz it’s the industry standard smh. I’ve tried to learn photoshop for drawing a handful of times, and every time I try to learn it I get hung up on the lineart because I can’t figure out how to get my pen sensitivity right / I don’t like the photoshop brushes. Basically photoshop has been a thorn in my side for a few years and I’ve decided it’s time for me to bite the bullet and learn it. So I decided to draw Imp and Skizz and try a new process.
Basically. I sketched this on watercolor paper and lined it in India ink with a dip pen. After that was done, I took a good picture of it and edited it so it was just black and white so I could easily put it into photoshop. After it was in photoshop, I did a greyscale underpainting and then overlayed some color.
I’m not gonna lie to y’all as much as I like how this looks and I think after a certain point I enjoyed working on it this was. A huge pain in the butt. I had an unreasonable amount of technical difficulties trying to get the picture onto the right device / into photoshop / all that stuff. And I mean tech issues aside, I’m happy with this. I think it looks cool. But dang I dislike photoshop.
So anyways. Enjoy this doodle!! Imp and Skizz are always a joy to doodle. They’re homies. They’re buddies. They’re sillies. They’re the guys of all time. And they’re great to draw. But yeah. This doodle was a pain in the butt so I hope y’all like it lol :D
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everyone always says "don't make your first comic project one that you're overly attached to" for the sake of 'your big idea you're in love with is probably way more ambitious than your skill level will accommodate for' and that is a statement that i generally agree with. not me though, i'm different. /silly
i just feel like there is an alternative to that statement too which is both "you can start it anyways but just accept that later your early work will not be as good as the later work, creating a bit of a quality gap over the span of the comic" AND "the power of hyperfixating on your own characters for years at a time can make you actually do the big project so dont let the generalized advice about starting an overly ambitious project snuff the fire of your interest by making you feel like you have to wait 'until you're talented enough'. like you can always go back and re-do the old parts once you're better and that's okay. or you can leave them as a reminder of how much you've grown with your big passion project"
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gonna treat this site more like a blog and give updates on my writings because i noticed that if i get so much as one 'this sounds interesting' or 'cant wait to read' my brain short-circuits and spits out words in an hour that wouldve taken me a week to write otherwise
and with that, welcome to my wip rants :)
because i havent come up with better titles they are called The Ring (second coming fic) and Only Human (Crowley has lost his memories fic) lol and the former is mostly done, it only needs some editing but im saving that till after my exams because i know it's gonna be time-consuming. The latter however is still in full plotting mode and today i outlined all of chapter 8 (except for the flashbacks lol im ignoring the flashbacks) which i think is very nice :)
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I. Hurt.
And I was hurting anyway, I'm pretty down this morning, but this hurt came from an outside source, and affected me in a way I'd honestly not have expected.
See, we bought Nimona last week. After seeing the movie, my kids wanted to read it. And I ended up reading ahead, and I just finished it.
Bonus content at the end, it said, and I was like, oh, an epilogue to the epilogue maybe? That'd be nice. I don't love bittersweet endings, I'd rather...
...no, it's not the conclusion.
It's CHRISTMAS.
In a book that'd had no religion that I noticed up to that point, BOTH bonus extras...were Christmas.
Ya know, usually it doesn't bother me. Usually I just suck it up. I think it helps that I was raised around mostly Jews and people who, if Christian, it didn't matter much to them. I'm from the Upper West Side of Manhattan, the descendent of Lower East Side immigrants, and while the world outside was brutal - my grandfather was a World War 2 veteran and among the soldiers who liberated Dachau, I can't remember a time when I didn't know that most people would look the other way if people like me were slaughtered wholesale - my bubble was safe, we were accepted, we were insiders.
I honestly can't think of another time I've interacted with a piece of media and felt so immediately, instantly knocked across the face by OUTSIDER as I just did when I excitedly turned the page to see what these fun extra bonuses were...and it was fucking Christmas.
I didn't even read them.
I'm honestly. So disappointed.
I don't have a thick armor for this kind of hurt. I'm Jewish, and as an adult living outside my old UWS bubble, that's often meant I've felt like an outlier, but I've hardly ever had this feeling where I was welcome to something only to be suddenly, violently shoved out the door.
And I've heard nothing, n.o.t.h.i.n.g. but praise for this book. And on another day, it might not have bothered me. I've never really felt like I had to fight to be seen, especially since I'm tremendously secular. I mean, I've celebrated Christmas my entire life, for starters.
But why. Why was this fantasy setting suddenly Christian? Why was this the touted extra content? Why is THIS special, when the areligious world established to that point was apparently not special enough?
I can't say yet if this ruined the story for me. It's far too soon. But I'm *intensely*, viscerally let down, and...I hurt.
Christians...maybe stop doing this shit.
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