#oh how ecstatic my younger child self would be if i told them that this character would later come back and be relevant again years later

[kame56u]

happy birthday izou!

[buttercream-squad-imagines]

Tinder in Real Life

Pairings: Harry Lewis x fem!Reader, Sidemen x platonic!Reader Word Count: 2k Warnings: Language some people may find offensive, sexual themes, recycled lines from Sidemen Tinder in Real Life because I'm not at all creative Request: Hey! Could you do reader x Harry imagine where the sidemen do a collab video with the reader who is also a big youtuber and Harrys celebrity crush. And during the video the reader is very flirty, leaving Harry a flustered mess when the flirting is directed towards him, but very jealous when its with any other sidemen.

The Sidemen were one of the biggest groups on YouTube and one that you were very familiar with. At the age of 23, you were a fair bit younger than some of its oldest members but yet you had a close relationship with JJ, whom you had met through YouTube.

You had started your channel when you were 17, just under four years ago, making makeup videos, which was a passion of yours when you were younger. Not that you were any good at it back then. Those videos quickly become unlisted when your channel started blowing up in late 2016, now nearing 20 million at the present time.

It wasn't long before you expanded your horizons and had started making different sorts of videos, including vlogs of your everyday life - which wasn't and still isn't that exciting in your opinion - and those where you just had a laugh, attempting to do stupid challenges that were so popular back then. It was those, however, that grew your channel. Your fans seemed to love them and so you gradually started to make more.

As your small channel began to grow significantly, it caught the attention of KSI, a member of the Sidemen, who reached out to you to for a collab. You were ecstatic. You couldn't believe it at the time, why would someone like KSI with 20 million subscribers want to collaborate with you? By that time, you couldn't exactly call yourself a small channel anymore, with almost 5 million subscribers but it still didn't make any sense to you.

You and JJ quickly bonded after filming together. You had a very similar sense of humour and interests. As the years went, the older boy became one of your best friends, the nature of your relationship being very teasing and flirtatious but the both of you knew it was a joke. It was just the way you both were.

Though despite having known him for nearing 3 years now, you had never met the rest of the Sidemen, with the exception of Simon, as he lived with JJ. Which is why when he texted asking you to collaborate with the Sidemen, you couldn't turn the offer down. You were a fan of the group and the content they were producing. You thought the videos that they made were exceptional, that they were pushing the envelope of the standard of content on YouTube and often found yourself excited for new videos.

He had explained that they were filming another of their 'Tinder in real life' but a YouTuber version with the likes of BambinoBecky and ChiWithAC. You were so excited. You were finally going to meet the rest of JJ's friends and you had the opportunity to be a part of a Sidemen Sunday.

You arrived at the studio the boys were filming at in the afternoon, finding and greeting JJ before he introduced you to the other sidemen in addition to Lux, Freezy and Stephen.

"And you've already met Simon." He finished.

"Yeah. Nice to finally meet you all. JJ tells me a lot about you guys." You laughed.

"Because that's assuring." Ethan pointed out with a chuckle, the other boys letting out agreements.

"Not all bad, I promise." You teased, winking at him. Ethan felt the blood rushing to his face, immediately becoming flustered and stumbling over his words. You found that you often had that effect on people as you could be very direct and flirtatious even when you didn't mean it. To you it was just friendly banter.

"Geez Y/N, stop flirting with people you met literally five minutes ago." JJ rolled his eyes.

"You sound a bit jealous, Jide." You smirked, a teasing grin spread across your face.

"Nah, allow it." There were eruptions of laughter around the room, coming from the boys. You were quick to notice Harry standing out of the way and was significantly quieter than the others, with what seemed to be a forced smile on his face.

Harry was in his own head, barely paying attention to what was going on around him. When JJ had told him that you were going to be in the next Sidemen video, he panicked. You were an accomplished YouTuber who he was quite fond of to say the least. Well, that would be an understatement, he had a fairly large crush on you. A crush that no one but Freezy and Lux knew about.

He knew that JJ had been friends with you for some time now but never considered the possibility of even meeting you. His anxiety acted as a barrier to even the thought of it. But he was currently in the same room as you and had said nothing more than a short 'hello'. He longed to have the confidence Ethan had to speak to you, even more so for you to look at him the way you were.

Already you were flirting with JJ and Ethan, something that caused a pit to form at the bottom of his stomach. He wouldn't admit it, but he could slowly feel the jealousy forming. Not that he had anything to be jealous about in the first place!

You continued to speak with the boys as you got your mic set up, telling them stories you were sure would embarrass JJ.

"Y/N, stop." The older boy whined. He could be like a child sometimes, but it was one of his more endearing qualities. He simply wouldn't be JJ if he wasn't.

"No, carry on." Simon laughed.

"Oh, don't worry, there's plenty more where that came from." You teased.

"I think it's time we started, don't you think?" Harry grumbled.

"Right." You smiled at the boy, who's cheeks became tinted red. He ducked to hide his face and walked around to stand in the line, hiding himself in the middle.

"Hi, I'm Y/N, I'm 23 and I'm from Y/H/T." You spoke to the camera once you were given the go ahead.

"I'm Simon, I'm 28. I like to practice safe sex."

"Always a good start."

"I could tie you to the bed, so you don't fall off." He finished with a giggle. You acted like you were pondering it for a moment before letting out a laugh and swiping right.

"I'm down for that." You teased. The boys all let out rumbles of laughter

"Hi, I'm Ethan, I'm 26 and kiss me if I'm wrong, but you're gonna swipe right."

"What would you rather?" You joked. Ethan shrugged his shoulders and walked closer to the board, sticking his head through with his lips puckered, eliciting a cry of protest from Harry that this wasn't allowed. You laughed and made an over exaggerated motion to swipe to the right, causing him to pout playfully but walked over to the right anyway.

"Hi, I'm Josh, I'm 28. KSI has a top ten single, but you're the only hot single I can see."

"Wow, that was smooth!" You said with a grin. "Definite yes from me."

"I'm Callum, I'm 26. Are you into fitness?" Freezy asked.

"Can't say I am." You replied, unsure of what turn this could take.

"How about you fitness dick in your mouth?"

"I wouldn't get too excited babes, I gag on my toothbrush." You laughed. "We could try though."

You swiped right on him, chuckling as you watched him let out a yes before joining Simon, Ethan, and Josh. You frowned slightly, a crease forming between your brows as you saw Harry whisper something furiously at his friend but ultimately got distracted by Vik stepping up to go next.

"I'm Vik, I'm 25. My ex-girlfriend always said I'd never do better than her, wanna prove her right?" You could hear the cries of the boys in the background, some scolding him, others laughing.

"Man actually said prove her right. Not wrong." JJ shrieked with a shocked look on his face, holding his head with his hands.

"You need to find someone for that." You snarked, swiping left on the boy, who shrugged and walked off.

"Damn! You got told!" Lux cackled.

"Uh hi. I'm Harry. I'm uh 25, no I'm not I'm 24." He stumbled. "Are you sure you're a muggle? Because that ass is magical."

"You should see how magical it can be." You spoke before cringing at yourself and laughing, swiping right to avoid a reply. The boy's face grew a bright shade of red, closely resembling the colour of a tomato.

"Geez, is that an offer?!" Freezy yelled from the right side. You laughed, observing how Harry whispered furiously to the boy to stop and winked at him once he had could see. Your laughter only increased as you watched JJ step up.

"I'm JJ. I'm 28 and are you a raisin? Cause you're raising my dick." The boy in question stood in front of you so confidently, hands clasped together in front of him so seriously that you just lost it. By the time you composed yourself, there were tears almost falling from your eyes.

"A* for effort." You laughed, swiping right eliciting a cry of success.

You had wrapped up filming your segment of the video, which conveniently was the last of the day. You found JJ who you spoke to whilst the other boys were otherwise occupied talking to each other.

"Cheers for coming, Y/N/N. You've been great."

"Anything for you." You joked.

"Don't tempt me." He laughed. You could feel eyes on you, eyes that were burning into your side. You turned your head to see Harry staring you and JJ down before looking away after being caught in the act, and suddenly felt very uncomfortable.

"Does Harry not like me or something?" You whispered to JJ, feeling self-conscious all of a sudden.

"Not that I know of." He frowned looking at the younger boy. "He can be a bit awkward at times and gets flustered a lot."

"Right." You agreed. You excused yourself before sauntering up to the boy in question, calling his name to snap him out of the daze he appeared to be in.

"Oh, um hey Y/N." He stumbled.

"Hi." You smiled gently. "I uh, I was just wondering, do you... have I done something to offend you?"

"Offend me? Why, uh, why would you think that?" He rambled.

"It's just... it's nothing, it's probably just me overthinking things." You waved it off, feeling like a complete idiot.

"I'm sorry if I gave you the impression that I don't like you. I don't not like you, in fact I really like you! Oh, um I mean I like you, you're very pretty." The boy couldn't stop rambling which made you laugh. "No, wait."

"You think I'm pretty?" You blushed interrupting him. Harry felt his mouth go dry, not being able to get anything coherent to come out. "Well, Harry, I really like you too."

"What?" His eyebrows shot up so far it was almost comical. "Really? So, you don't like the other guys?"

"What? No." You laughed. "That's absurd. Why would you think that?"

"You seemed very..." The boy trailed off, not wanting to offend you after you had admitted to liking him.

"Flirty?" You finished, causing him to nod. "I'm like that with everyone, I don't mean to be half the time."

"Oh."

"Well, how about you give me your phone number and when you finally grow a pair, you can ask me out?" Your confidence levels had shot up spontaneously.

"Uh, sure." His cheeks had become a dark shade of red as he passed his phone to you so you could put your number in. You kept looking up at him as you typed, putting your name under 'Y/N x' in his contacts before handing it back to him.

"Y/N! Come on! We're going to Nando's!" JJ called from the other side of the room.

"Call me." You winked. Your bottom lip was caught between your teeth and was currently the only thing from stopping the wide grin from spreading across your face. A grin that hadn't disappeared from your face for the rest of the day, much to the curiosity of JJ, who was disappointed when you refused to tell him why, or more appropriately who, had put the smile on your face.

[lefinohohohohon]

DCKZ (Diluc, Childe, Kaeya, Zhongli) Idol!AU Genshin Impact

DCKZ HOW THE GROUP WAS FORMED:

DCKZ is a fanmade k-pop group based on Genshin Impacts's character " Diluc, Childe. Kaeya, and Zhongli as an idol group in an Idol AU.

Character design belongs to @veechu (please check it out and give them love)

Some of the headcanons I used for references came from Erica's comment on "ventiffin"'s youtube video: 

Link: (195) Pov: 4NEMO & DCKZ are having a rap battle | a playlist - YouTube

and Yajle Gaite on riko's youtube playlist: (196) attending a dckz concert – a genshin playlist - YouTube

P.S Diluc & Kaeya's part is longer since their together.

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Childe:

Ajax or as he was known currently with his fans because of his various song covers "Tartaglia" had just finished tidying up his recording room to attend his practice session at the gym for MMA, as he was placing his spare clothes on his duffle bag, he took a quick swipe at his phone buzzing with notification at his latest cover.

A sweet genuine smile carved at Childe's face as he reads a thousand messages on his post as he was savoring the joyful and thirsty comments as well as memes about him a message from an unknown sender appeared on his screen curious, Childe tap on the email sent to him when he reads who was the sender he was both thrilled at the same time skeptical. 

'This couldn't possibly be true, can't it? No way?'

he thought to himself, eyes wide open, body shaking of nervousness and excitement. He took the hand that had covered his mouth in a shock away and took a deep breath gulping down a breath he had not noticed he was holding

"Okay, Ajax just chill. .  . just chill man, you still don't know what the message is about don't get ahead, Oh Tsaritsa what should I do?" he told himself and slowly exhaled before continuing to read the rest of the content

----------------------------------------------------------

"Greetings, Tartaglia!

On behalf of Geo Ent. we would like to express our desire to have you as one of our new talents. Currently, Geo Ent. has been looking for new trainees for a new idol group, your recent crack cover had made the Geo ent. scout you, the company believes that with your talents and charisma you will be a great asset to Geo ent as one of its rising stars.

If you have any clarifications regarding our offer, you may call us at XXXX- XXX-XXXX  or email us with this email address at any given time and if you prefer to personally talk you may visit us at "Golden Pavilion, Liyue" we will cover your travel expense and accommodation for the duration of your stay regarding our offer. 

Thank you and we hope your decision will be in our favor. We are looking forward to hearing from you soon!

Sincerely,

Katherine

Geo Ent.

Talent Scout Manager

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A scream from his room interrupted Ajax's family, everyone looked atop the stairs as heavy footsteps hastily descend upon the living room where everyone was eating snacks, Ajax who was still ecstatic at the email he had received hugged his siblings tightly and kissed his mother on the cheek before taking Teucer his younger brother and tossing him gleefully in the air  the younger boy happily cried "higher brother, higher!" Teucer said

"Hahaha, of course, anything for my little brother" he laughed while catching Teucer.

"Hahaha, You're beaming, there must be something good, да?" Ajax's father commented as he chuckled at his son's antics when he gets excited

"My, my you seemed to be happy Ajax, did something happen?" Ajax's mother commented as she continued to watch the brothers lovingly, upon hearing his mother he threw Teucer one more time in the air before catching him and placing him down safely on the floor with their other siblings, Ajax smiled toothly at his mother before nestling down between his mother and father who sat on the sofa clasping each of their hands on his as he breathed steadying his excited heart.

"I received an email from a company" he started trying to assess his parents 

"Oh? From who? Is it a sponsorship from that brand you want?" His mother inquired knowing too well that his son was already famous to have some sponsorship from different companies.

Ajax chuckled, he knew his family will be shocked at the news he was about to tell them "Hmm, better" he teased eyeing his father this time to see his reaction

"Better, huh?" His dad started then a twinkle of surprise resurfaced on his father's eyes as he made a deduction "Don't tell me? Are you serious Ajax?" His father continued as he assumed what could be better than having sponsorship from a company

"They're hiring you? What company? No! wait! don't tell me it wouldn't be any regular company who will message you especially with what you often do. . . so it has to be-"

Before his father could even continue Ajax, answered for him "Geo Ent. invited me to be one of their new talents for an idol g-"

Before he could even say everything else, Ajax was clamored down by his siblings who were listening and his father on the sofa congratulating him.

"Congratulations son! I know you had it in you, especially since you have my face, hahaha!"

"Congratulations! Big brother!"

"Big brother will be famous soon! Will you be cosplaying as Mr. Cyclops too?"

"Big brother is talented so of course they want you to be their talent!"

"Now, now I haven't given them their answer which reminds me I have to call them now to-  uh, mom?" Ajax called after noticing that his mother standing on the other side of their house pulling what seemed to be a bunch of large travel luggage.

"Ajax, dear, do you think these pieces of luggage will be enough for your things while you stay in Liyue, or do we need to buy more?" Her mother probed and all he could Ajax do was laughed at his excited family.

"Let me call them first"

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Diluc & Kaeya:

A selca here, a selca there, and of course a selca of his favorite brother should also be included in his latest insta, though Kaeya wished that Diluc would smile more at his pictures of him, he always looked aloof

"Can you please try to smile at least once, when I take your picture?" Kaeya whined mumbling that his brother's good looks are wasted with his unchanging face

"I would if you stopped placing unnecessary caption on my pictures and for the last time Kaeya, stop drinking! It's the middle of the day" Diluc retorted eyeing his brother's various drinks placed neatly all at once on the VIP lounge they are currently staying at in "Cat's tail".

'He's not going to drink all of this, is he?'

Diluc thought to himself innocently before his brows started scrunching a moment later at the possibility of it happening, after all this is Kaeya he was talking about, his self-proclaimed wine/alcohol-connoisseur brother Kaeya.

He sighed exasperatedly plopping his head on the velvet backrest of the chair he is currently sitting on his back facing his brother 

"Why am I with you again?" He asked out loud asking himself more than his brother who he accompanied, he often wonders to himself what made him go along with Kaeya's wine tasting adventure despite disliking alcohol himself. 

"Because you're my big brother and you love me and despite your nagging, you wanted to make sure I enjoy what I'm doing safely- does that answer your question"

"Yeah, that's right because I care too much about you that's what big brothers do" Diluc mumbled back while patting a cat on his lap that has somehow managed to make it thru their private lounge.  Kaeya grinned all too knowingly at his brother recording their conversation live secretly to his followers on insta with the camera facing his brother's back, he's sure Diluc will kill him if he saw what he was doing but for now, while he's still alive, he'll savor his brother's words. He might be too mischievous but he sincerely appreciates Diluc's love for him despite their constant petty fights.

"Kaeya, just promise me you won't- huh?" Just as Diluc was turning to face Kaeya he noticed his brother's phone and his shit-eating grin plastered on his tanned brother leaning one arm on the velvety lounge chair suddenly he felt the want to strangle someone to death.

"Aww~ <3, mind repeating that? My followers are crying over your message" 

The cat who was sitting on Diluc's lap leaped out of the other male sensing the impending danger that is about to happen in the lounge.

"KAEYA. . . . .. . !"

"Well, that's it for now my followers! Pray that'll be alive after this! Bye!-"

"KAEYA!"

 was the last word Kaeya's followers heard before the live ended.

"Please come again!" The hostess Margaret said as the two good-looking brothers left the establishment with one looking aloof once again arms crossed over his chest while the other looked scruffy following behind the older red-head male sighing

"Must you waste good alcohol? I was looking forward to tasting those!" Kaeya felt dejected after not having even a sip of any of the cocktails he ordered, he glared dagger at Diluc

"It's for your own good, I told you, too much alcohol isn't good for you" Diluc sighed not even looking at his brother as they walked to the street, he was specifically trying to find Good Hunters to order chicken skewers for Kaeya since he knew his brother is upset.

"I haven't even got a single sip! And I paid for those"

"Of course you should, you ordered them after all," Diluc said eyeing the shop across from them, he waited for Kaeya to be on his side before patting his brother's back to led him to cross the street, Kaeya huffed while walking and looking at his brother dead in the eye he can't believe he paid for nothing

"But I didn't break the glasses why did you use my card to pay for those as well?"

"To maximize your card limit so you can't pay for anymore cocktail"

"What. . .?!" Kaeya couldn't believe what he was hearing, he won't be able to drink any at all, tears started forming on his visible eye quickly and sniffing could also be heard a second later, Diluc turned to look at this brother with crocodile tears he sighed again for the nth time today

He can be so melodramatic sometimes and I'm an idiot for always indulging him

He thought brows knotted together as he waits for Kaeya to deliver his 'guilt-ridden' lines he often uses at him to get his way, his brother is too good at mind games

"H-how could you. . . I thought you love me as your younger brother maybe you really-"

"-STOP"

". . ."

"sighs* first let's get you some chicken skewers, I know you're really upset even if you don't really show it and when we get home I'll make you some death afternoon"

"Really? Aww! Thanks Luc! You're really are the best big bro! hehehe" And as quickly as Kaeya summoned his tears as quickly as it also disappeared across his face replaced with his infamous shit-eating grin knowing he got his way again, he patted Diluc's back as he quickly makes his way towards Good Hunter to order chicken skewers, he'll order a few to eat at Good hunters and order some more to bring back at the mansion he'll have to convince Diluc as well to give him sparkling wine to make his fruity chicken skewers he's sure his brother wouldn't mind.

Just as Kaeya was placing his order, Diluc sat at one of the open tables on the veranda and waited for his brother when he noticed a bobbed-cut black-haired woman staring in their direction, Diluc paid her no mind thinking that the woman was probably one of Kaeya's follower on insta waiting for Kaeya to return to have a photo ops with his brother

"Hey, Luc! You don't mind if I ordered some chicken skewer to go, right?"

speak of the devil, Kaeya nonchalantly walked back to him all smiles this time as he took his seat parallel to his brother "Sure, whatever makes you happy. . .  by the way" Diluc leaned forward arms still crossed as he placed them atop the table "Kaeya I think that woman is one of your-"

"-She isn't" Kaeya responded strongly as he places one of his arms above the table cradling his chin on his palm looking at the counter to see if his chicken skewers are ready 

"Oh, and how do you know? You haven't even looked at her?" he rose one incredulous brow at his younger brother. It always amazes Diluc how Kaeya can be quite perceptive of things when it's convenient for him.

"Because that woman has been following us since we left the Dad's office this morning"

What?!

A look of disbelief flashed on Diluc's handsome face at the realization and knotted his brows later at his brother's words

"If she's been following us since the beginning"  Diluc emphasized, "why did you tell me only now?" He sighed closing his eyes trying to alleviate the incoming migraine he's about to have, he tapped the table with his finger waiting for Kaeya's explanation, his brother is preceptive he wouldn't be so careless especially since the two of them are well-known sons of the world-famous wine-tycoon Crepus Ragnvindr it is bond that there will be people who are after them either to do them harm or to gain something from their family.

"Relax, she doesn't look dangerous or to be more precise she isn't with someone dangerous though we'll have to verify that once she talks to us"

And just as Kaeya spoke, the woman who had been tailing them stood from her seat and politely approached them 

"Good day gentlemen, may I take some of your time?" she stated with a polite smile looking at the two brothers

Diluc only nodded in acknowledgment while Kaeya gave her his fan-service smile 

"Of course, please have a seat you must have been tired waiting for the right time to approach and talk to us, aren't you? You should have just come forward instead of stalking us, you do know that's a crime right? I can report you easily to the police but of course, that'll depend on your reasons" With a friendly facade, Kaeya warned the young woman openly of what he can do if he finds anything about her intention dangerous, the young woman was surprised and at the same time embarrassed for looking like a suspicious person, well she could understand their apprehensive behavior towards her, she was after all following them since the beginning.

She cleared her throat and offered her hand to formally introduce herself "I apologize if my action seemed suspicious to you Mr. Diluc and Mr. Kaeya it's only for my line of work. I'm Katherine by the way" 

The brother's looked at Katherine's extended hand before looking at one another assessing Katherine's words, Kaeya took her hand first smiling while Diluc just watched, his brother is better than him when it comes to conversation especially to strangers

"Yes, it's indeed suspicious for an unknown young woman to follow and even know something about us, so tell me what kind of job stalks people? I haven't read anything of that sort from the classified ads or is it that the government legalized stalking, hmm?"

Okay, Diluc takes it back, his brother is definitely not good at normal conversation Kaeya's better at interrogating he has forgotten his brother used to be in the military. He should take over before Kaeya makes the young woman even flustered as she was already.

"What my brother is trying to say is to please explain to us why were you following us, I apologize if we're a bit apprehensive with you but I guess you already know why we're like that so if you wouldn't mind, we'd like to hear your reason"

Seeing the window of opportunity to be heard, Katherine immediately blubbered the purpose of her stalking the handsome brothers forgetting the tell them about the company and whatnot.

"IwasscoutingyoutobepartofournewIdolgroup!"

". . . " ". . .huh?" 

was the only response of the brothers

"I-I mean, the two of you are already well-known and has a great number of fanbase on insta, the company was looking for new talents such as you two when we saw your insta stories of Mr. Diluc performing a jazz song on a piano and Mr. Kaeya's guitar cover the higher-ups decided to make an offer to the both of you that's why I was following you"

". . . I . . . see"

". . hmm"

Again, the brothers only looked at her with doubt, Katherine could already see on their heads she was being labeled as a 'scammer'

Embarrassed and unable to bear the brothers piercing doubtful gazes, Katherine hastily stood from her seat

"A-anyway, now that I have said what I needed to say, please excuse me and thank you for sparing me your time, i-if you have any doubts about my offer you can visit us at "Golden Pavillion, Liyue" though she was embarrassed, Katherine made an effort to politely offer her business card before fleeing the scene leaving the brothers confused and curious at the same time, the brothers looked at the business card left to them and looked at one another

"It's a scam," the two of them said in unison they deduced, however, the two of them were still curious, Kaeya was about to reach out to take the business card when his name was called up from the counter of Good Hunters for his chicken skewers, Diluc still looking at the business card left by Katherine gave Kaeya his card to pay for his order and take-away when Diluc was left on the table alone, he took the unique looking card and swiped his thumb on the high-quality bronze gold-like colored business card written on its front was Katherine's name and her position as a Talent Scout Manager and other contact details but nothing about the company.

"an Idol, huh" he breathed still eyeing the card, a longing gaze swept across his handsome face as recalls a childhood dream he once had to be a musical performer just like his deceased mother, he recalls his earliest memories of his mother playing the piano while he sang, his father Crepus listening to the mother-son duet with the proudest and happiest look a father could ever have and even when his mother died, Diluc continued to play for his grieving father, music made it less painful for the both of them and made it easier for them to remember the happiest time with his mother. 

The first time Diluc thought of being a musician was when he met Kaeya, compared before his brother was frail and timid not like the confident flirt and perceptive- bastard he is now. When Kaeya was first brought to their mansion at the winery his brother had trouble sleeping, being plagued with nightmares night after night, worried, and unable to bear Kaeya's suffering he took his younger brother to the music room one night and sat him comfortably with one of the chairs as he plays one of his mother's pieces hoping it will help his little brother when he finally finished playing he was surprised to find his brother sleeping soundly on the chair and since then, every night Diluc would take Kaeya to the music room and make a pillow fort together so they could sleep comfortably after Diluc finishes playing the piano and just like every night Kaeya would be asleep on his part of the bed Diluc would tuck his brother up, however, that night was different someone else has already tucked Kaeya on their self-made pillow fort

"Dad, you're home," Diluc said as he stood up from the chair and made a beeline towards his father, hugging the older male as Crepus knelt to received his son's affection.

"I wanted to come home early since I heard Kaeya was having trouble sleeping but I guess you already took care of it, huh?" Crepus chuckled as he ruffled his son's fluffy red hair"

"Of course! I'm his big brother, I need to protect him, heheh" Diluc beamed at his dad proudly with a toothy smile "Dad, I want to be a musician just like mom so I can play the pieces she composed and also help Kaeya sleep better! Kaeya needs to sleep a lot if he wants to be big as me so I'll play the piano for him every time he has a hard time sleeping"

Crepus chuckled at his son's determination and admired his reason, Diluc was always warm-hearted just like his deceased wife "Thank you Diluc, you're really a great big brother to Kaeya"

For years Crepus and Kaeya had been supportive of his dream of becoming a musician until that one fateful day of his 18th birthday, His father, Kaeya, and their acquaintances prepared a birthday party for him at one of their many branches worldwide in Angels Share located in Mondstadt he was excited not only because he's at a legal age now but because he also received a letter of acceptance to one of the prestigious music school, he knew Kaeya and his Dad will be thrilled at the news, however, everything from that day had been a nightmare for him It was the day he learned the truth about his father's health condition and Kaeya's reason why he was adamant about going to Khaenri'ah. 

That day on his 18th birthday everything changed, the father he once thought was healthy was sick and the brother he thought who wouldn't hide anything from him was keeping a secret.

"Kaeya, why didn't you tell me dad was sick! I thought there was no secret between us?! And why am I only hearing about your trip to Khaenri'ah now? What are you planning on doing in that place?! You're barely legal!"

"sigh* Just focus on becoming a musician Luc, you don't need to concern yourself with me going to Khaenri'ah as for dad's health he made me promise not to tell you because he knew you will act like this"

"To hell with how I act! I deserve to know what's happening to my family. Tell me the truth Kaeya!"

In that instant, on his 18th birthday, Diluc's dream of becoming a musician was left focusing solely on the family business, he also made sure that Kaeya will finish his military training and become an accomplished Brigadier General at such a young age just like his brother's dream. Kaeya's dream shouldn't be compromised because of his family's business, Diluc always thought Kaeya should deserve better but after 4 yrs of only serving his bastard of a brother retired from his position the moment he was back from establishing a branch in Khaenri'ah stating he missed him and the taste of wine and prefers to work as a wine-connoisseur instead. With years apart he didn't even know Kaeya started playing the guitar to fill the silent hollow covering their mansion when he stopped playing any instrument, though they weren't as close as they used to 4 yrs ago, they're trying their best to live as brothers.

He was still reminiscing about the past when he heard Kaeya's voice  near him

"Want to check it out?" his brother probed as he took his seat a platter of chicken skewers placed in front of him and another bag to take home, Diluc didn't answer and simply placed the unique looking card back at the table saying nothing

"I'm curious as well Luc, let's go" Kaeya insisted after taking a graceful bite of his skewer 

"You already said it yourself, it's a scam why bother?"

"Yeah, but I mean there is nothing we could lose by checking it out and if it's really a scam then I could just report it to the guys back at the military, I'm still a military officer you know"

"A retired military officer" Diluc corrected, Kaeya paid his comment no mind and insisted "Come on Luc, let's try it out, you've put a hold of your dream as a musician for a long time now, I've become a military officer just like my dream, Dad's health is alright and you already succeeded in opening a branch in Khaenri'ah so, what's holding you up?"

Diluc sighed, Kaeya is right everything's fine now, except for him, he guessed it's about time for him to fulfill his dream, Diluc sighed once again but this time it wasn't due to annoyance from his brother but rather he sighed of relief of finally letting himself accomplished his dream

"Fine, let's check it out" he finally answered

"Great!" Kaeya cheered "You heard him loud and clear right, dad? We'll visit Liyue soon"

What? Dad?! Since when did Kaeya had been talking to dad?

"you snake. . . " Diluc mumbled under his breath looking at his giggling brother who managed to manipulate him again, he heard their father's hearty laugh from the other end "Thank you Kaeya, make sure Diluc's wish comes true,  alright?"

"Of course, dad, anything for my big bro that's a promise" Kaeya looked at his brother adoringly as he told their father however before Kaeya could end the call, Diluc took his phone and left a clear declaration of his new dream and goal. 

"Don't worry Dad, I'll make sure to fulfill my dream- becoming a musician along with my little brother"

"what. . . ? Why am I involve in this?" Kaeya whispered over the phone

"Because I've had a different dream this time, performing with you, didn't you say you'd do anything for your big bro?" Diluc stated as a matter of factly "Or are you just saying that, maybe you never meant it and hated your big bro-"

"-Alright! Fine I'll audition with you" Kaeya couldn't believe Diluc copied his guilt-ridden strategy, he should be more careful now around his brother until now he only thought it would only work on Diluc and not back-fired at him

Over the phone, Crepus was laughing loudly at his sons' exchanged, he was happy, joyous even knowing that his two pride and joy are still getting along despite the rift that had happened between them. 

"Alright, do your best boys but just in case bring someone else with you, it'll put my heart at ease knowing you two are safe, will that be alright?"

"of course dad," the brothers said in unison, laughing at one another.

The following day at the Golden Pavillion, Katherine who was busy checking any response from the talent she had scouted was abruptly called by the receptionist because of a commotion at their company's lobby. Upon reaching the said lobby Katherine was surprised to see a lot of black-suited men guarding every corner of their building looking for anything suspicious when one of the black-suited men noticed her, the man straightforwardly asked her without reserved "Excuse me ma'am are you, Katherine?"

"uhh. .  . y-yes! Why did I do something?" Katherine asked nervously racking her brain for any memory that would warrant her for an arrest of some sort but as soon as she saw a pair of good-looking men walking her way, she recalled one of the brother's threat

"- You should have just come forward instead of stalking us, you do know that's a crime right? I can report you easily to the police but of course, that'll depend on your reasons" 

No way! Is she going to be arrested for stalking Crepus Ragnvindr's sons?!

Oh, God, I was only scouting them, I didn't mean to do anything illegal! 

Katherine silently prayed as the group of men parted to make way for the two young men, contrary to what Katherine imagined of disdain from the brothers because of her scouting, The two looked friendlier than before, the younger brother Kaeya if she remembers even smiled and waved at her calling her but she shouldn't let her guard down, compared to the older brother Diluc who looks intimidating is less of a threat compared to Kaeya.

"Oh, Ms. Katherine we were looking for you!"

"y-yes? H-how can I help you" she answered in surprise, readying herself for any possible threat the younger male may speak

"We're here to discuss your offer from last time, does it still stands?" Diluc the older brother inquired and for a moment, Katherine felt she was dreaming or is this another ploy to threaten her because they misunderstood her scouting them, she was silent for a minute or two before Kaeya probed her

"Hmm, Ms. Katherine?"

"Ah! Y-yes? I'm sorry I was spacing out" she started still frightened at her surroundings "I'm just overwhelmed with. . ." she looked around her and to the black-suited clad men in the lobby ". . . with this. I was expecting it'll only be you two to visit our building" she explained while the brothers only looked at her understanding what the young woman meant, it could really be intimidating to be surrounded by a lot of bodyguards, however, Kaeya snickered despite trying to apologize profusely at the scene they made

"pfft. . hehehe I-I . . . hehehe . . .we're so sorry if that's what you felt Ms.Katherine but you also have to understand our side, you left immediately after saying your piece without any explanation and your business card doesn't even give any hint about your company" Kaeya explained

"WHAT?!" Katherine spoke, now that she recalls she indeed forgot to tell them because of Kaeya's threat

"We sincerely thought it was a scam and just decided to check the place you mentioned, we just took some extra precautions just in case, I hope you understand, hehehe"

"I-I. . . yes alright, I understand, t-then are the both of you auditioning or just one of you?"

The brothers looked at one another, a knowing smile grazing their handsome faces as they answer Katherine in unison.

"Both of us, if you don't mind"

----------------------------------------------------------

Zhongli:

He was taking his usual stroll in the city trying to relieve another stressful day at work, he had no destination on mind letting his feet take him when he noticed a bunch of freshly picked Qingxin flowers being displayed in the flower shop, Zhongli seeing the flower made him stood in place, a look of longing for someone was reflected on his amber-golden eyes and for a moment he felt the wind blew gently at him swaying his long tied hair

'Oh yeah? Let's see who sings better? You may have that deep alluring voice but I can sing better than you! heh"

'I hope I can see the two of you perform soon! I wouldn't miss it for the world'

"Is it that time already?" he asked himself looking at the clear blue sky above him smiling although with a hint of melancholy, without another word Zhongli purchased a bunch of Qingxin flowers thanking Hu Tao for reminding him of his wallet and as if the wind were guiding him, Zhongli walked where ever the wind blew and before he knew where he was heading he found himself listening to a sound of a harp playing in the distant the soft melodies flowing in the air made him stop on his tracks and a vision of young woman sat with the harp playing covered his eyes

". . . Guizhong?" he mumbled one hand reaching out to the phantom image of his long-gone lover and a second later he felt himself walking towards her mirage only for him to realize his mind was playing tricks at him again. He stood in silence a prick of pain throb his chest slowly growing to his whole body, he covered his handsome stern face with his free hand and heaved a deep sigh not to recollect himself but rather to shake off the incoming tears in his eyes.

'I really love listening to your voice Zhongli, when you become famous don't forget to sing for me, okay?' 

'I'll always be by your side to support you so don't worry about me '

'you worry too much Zhongli, hehehe I may be small compared to you but I can take care of myself, just focus on your dream you made a bet with Barbatos after all'

Try as hard as he can, the emotions insides him betrayed him and a tear slowly cascaded his face at the memory of Guizhong and his time with her, he felt bittersweet at the memory. He was able to achieve what he wants but the person he wants to show his achievement was no longer with him.

How ironic but we can't all have the good things in life can't we? 

He thought as he carefully wiped the remnants of his tears across his face and composed himself again before walking once again to give the flowers to its owner. 

As Zhongli walked the pavement towards the cemetery where Guizhong's tombstone lies he noticed a smaller male sitting in front of her laughing to himself as he lifts a goblet of what seems to be a wine to the air

"I hope you're happy there dear, our beloved stern-face brutish blundering buffoon finally decided to uphold our bet, heh - though I might say it took longer but don't worry the wait is worth it so please keep watching over him, alright? He's. . . .  well, busied himself with others after you were gone can't blame him, you were precious to him" the smaller male said as if he was talking to a person, he leaned back admiring the clear blue sky a soft breeze of the wind passed as if it was agreeing to what he had said earlier about Zhongli not realizing that the male in question was just standing a couple of feet away from them his looming shadow cast over the shorter male as he approaches and a look of disdain clearly pasted on his face.

"Oh, so I'm stern-face blundering baffoon, huh? Oh, how convenient that there's stone here, you wouldn't mind me hitting you with it won't you Barbatos?" Zhongli sarcastically said tossing the pebble in his hand in the air up-down, up-down like a warning as he eyed the man

"hahaha, did I say that? I wasn't actually talking about you rather -"

"huh, save it, Barbatos" The taller man sighed "though I'm surprised to find you here I heard you are busy with your pre-debut" Zhongli threw the pebble to the ground to the relief of Barbatos and sat next to the smaller male offering the Qingxin flower and a short prayer wiping away the dust and dirt that littered her tomb 

Hello, love it's been a while since I lost visit, I hope Barbatos, Xiao, and Ganyu has been keeping you company for me

 He told her silently before he looked back at the shorter male eyeing the wine on his goblet

"Osmanthus?" Zhongli probed 

"The one and only I know you like this stuff and what better way to taste it on the day you finally accepted Geo ent.'s offer, heheh" Barbatos chuckled as he poured another goblet to Zhongli and another in a smaller cup to Guizhong's tomb.

The two men sat in silence neither tasting the wine and just relishing the peace between them before Barbatos cut the silence 

"Guizhong's case. . . it's finally closed, right?" he asked carefully, knowing it's a sensitive topic to his friend

Zhongli only nodded as he gracefully took a sip of the precious wine in his goblet

"I'm glad Guizhong finally had justice . . . she wouldn't have it if it weren't for you I'm sure she's thankful for you up there"

"I need to see to it that I closed her case, I wouldn't have peace if I allowed the criminal who wronged her not be punished" as Zhongli said that Barbatos noticed that somehow Zhongli was able to find peace- though a bit of longing hangs from his face from to time it's better than seeing his old friend looking desperate and empty

Barbatos sighed, "yeah, you've been busy. . . even becoming a lawyer heheh~ so, I guess I have to be careful with my words now, huh? or I might have a court order"  he jested knowing all his friend's activities in the past couple of years and why Zhongli only accepted the Geo ent.'s offer despite being scouted for several years

Zhongli was busy chasing and fighting the court for Guizhong's murder busy enough that his friend grew a bit distant from his relatives Xiao and Ganyu, that was the only reason why his friend became a lawyer and Barbatos doubts his friend will seriously take any more clients after this case was closed, after all, he wouldn't have accepted Geo ent.'s offer if he's serious about his law career, right? 

"Don't worry yourself, this will be the first and last case I'll handle" as if reading his mind, Zhongli responded clearing any doubt from his friend "though, if you break any contracts, I wouldn't mind suing you. .. . you still recall our bet right? A rematch who's a better singer? I'll be upholding that against you, Barbatos" Zhongli chuckled after taking another sip of the wine

"Of course I remember, heh! And it's not Barbatos call me 'Venti' now that's my screen name"

"I see. . . that's better compared to being called 'Barb' or 'atos', Xiao's also debuting with you. . . correct?" Zhongli asked remembering that his younger relative becoming close to his friend while he was busy with his law career.

"Yeah, we have 2 other members joining, you know Aether from ABYSS right? and then there's Kazuha Beidou's protege from Inazuma, You better prepare yourself Zhongli with my group we'll definitely crush you on our rematch, heheh"

Barbatos or as he would like to call himself now 'Venti' jokingly threatened his old rival to which Zhongli paid no mind and just smiled at him 

"I doubt that"

"Oh, aren't you confident? Lemme guess you're being grouped as well? I thought they offered you an exclusive solo contract?"

"They were, however, I asked them to change it mainly because I'm already old and youths prefer something more trendy and younger appearances and I believe we would lose to your group when it comes to charisma and looks" 

 Zhongli finished explaining before he felt his phone vibrated the company number of the Geo ent. flashing on his screen unexpectedly, it was too soon for them to call him regarding the other members. He stood from his seat and dusted off some of the dirt on his pants 

"I'll see you around Barba- I mean 'Venti' they're calling me"

"Don't sweat it, I'll look after Guizhong for a while before I head back and the next time we see each other it should be on stage, remember that, okay?" Venti called over as Zhongli started walking away to answer his call giving him one final look.

When he was finally out of earshot, Zhongli answered the phone the familiar voice of Katherine the talent scout manager greeted him

"Hello, Mr. Zhongli, are you available today for a meeting?"

"I am, what is the meeting all about?" he asked

"It's about your other bandmates, they're here, and we would like for you to get to know one another before proceeding with the formation of your group,"

At her answer, Zhongli saw a young woman was standing beside a plum blossom tree smiling at him the words the woman mouthed made him smile before her mirage disappeared along with the breeze.

'thank you & congratulations Zhongli . .  .'

"Mr. Zhongli?. . . will you be available sir?" 

Katherine's voice brought him back from his trance, he took a second or two before responding a smile evident in his voice.

"yes, I would love to meet them"

[ererokii]

Infinite || Izuku Midoryia

Izuku Midioryia x Fem! Reader (Soulmate AU)

Warnings: insecurities, bit of angst

Word Count: 3194

Synopsis: In a world where soulmates exist, Izuku Midoryia believes that he won’t have one on the day of his 17th birthday.

Taglist (message to be added): @pixxiesdust @shoutodoki @shoutosteakettle @saltie @fryingpanitachi @sugacookiies @kingtamakimurder

➺ Note: This is for the @bnhabookclub​‘s bingo event and Celebrating Deku event! The prompt are Long Kisses and “Did you ever think we would be here? I mean since we were kids, I just..”

Bingo Masterlist

Soulmates were always a thing since the beginning of time. The signs were simple when you were supposed to find your soulmate. You either share the same colored iris of their right eye, or their birth date would be tattooed on your thumb in cursive. Some people got both, while others just had one. 

The signs didn’t come at birth. Some babies were born with grey eyes and wouldn’t get their soulmate’s eye color until they turned 14. It was a celebration when a child finally got their right eye color, matching with their soulmate or not. However, there were cases where someone wouldn’t receive their right eye color until they turned 17. 

Other babies who were born with a birthmark in the shape of a heart on their thumb got their tattoo at the age of 5. It was funny how the two worked. But that’s how the universe wanted it. 

Izuku Midoryia was always a curious child, ever since he learned how to walk. He was always up to meeting anyone with a new face. You happened to fall victim to his ways. Izuku met you when both of you were 4 years old, at a park. You were running around the playground and when he saw you, he practically begged his mom to let him go. With much reluctance, she did. 

Both of you connected rather quickly. When your mothers called for you to leave, both of you clung to each other as you sobbed, begging for another 10 minutes with each other. Seeing their children already so close despite only knowing each other for an hour, the mothers decided to talk amongst themselves as well. 

Inko and your mother got along well. This meant that you and Izuku would be seeing each other a lot more, which both of you were ecstatic about.

Both of you went to the same school. In the younger grades, the teachers would hold a small celebration for any child that received their tattoo. It happened a couple of times. A group of small kids and their teacher surrounding one of the students, a bright glowing light emitting from their thumb. It was something that always fantasized Izuku. He couldn’t wait for his own.

Yet he wasn't born with the heart birthmark. You were born with one. 

That was the only thing you could babble about. How excited you were to find out the date, to find your prince charming as you told him after watching your princess movies. 

“I think today is the day Izu-kun! I feel it!” You spoke with confidence, jutting your thumb in his direction. 

“W-what makes you think that?!” he gasped, his small brain blown away at your confidence.

“I just feel it! Today I’m going to find out about my prince charming!!” You giggled as you curtseyed, acting out the role of the princess. “And we’ll dance and dance!”

“It sounds like you have your whole life planned out! I wish I was able to get one!”

“Silly!” You pointed to his grey eyes. “You’ll get the eye remember?! That’s super-duper cool if you ask me!”

He rubbed his knuckles gently bashfully as he lowered his head.”You really think so?”

“I know so! You’ll probably get a pink! Or maybe purple!”

“Maybe yellow!” Izuku’s little body rattled with laughter alongside you. Both of you were huddled up on the carpeted floor, minding your own business from the other kids who were too busy coloring. 

“Bright!” you gasped and held your hand out, a glowing light emitting from your heart birthmark. “S-Sensei! It’s glowing!”

At the sound of your voice, your teacher and your classmates rushed to you. Izuku scooted closer, watching the heart glow brighter. “Does it hurt Y/N-Chan?” he whispered in astonishment, hand touching your arm. 

You stayed silent as you stared at the scene in front of you, the heart outlined in a gold shimmery light, it’s light blinding but also beautiful. It fully stopped as black ink formed on your hand.

“What does it say?”

You whimpered and lifted your hand up to your teacher’s bent over body. “I don’t know what it says.” You were only five years old and was still learning to read your numbers.

A chuckle left their lips as they grabbed your tiny wrist in their bigger hand, scanning over it. “July 15th!”

Gasps resonated throughout the room.

“That’s my birthday!” Izuku squeaked out as he stared at you.

You cheekily smiled and clapped your hands together. “It is! Maybe it’s you Izu-kun! Maybe you’re my prince charming!”

“You think that?!”

“I don’t know! But will we dance and dance like they do in the fairytales?!”

Izuku absentmindedly nodded as he bowed. “Yes Princess Y/N! We will dance and dance!”

You jutted out your pinkie in his direction, a serious look for a five year old displayed on your face. “You pinkie promise swear Izu-kun?”

He stared at it for a second before sticking his pinkie out as well, wrapping his small one around yours. “I pinkie promise swear Y/N-chan!”

☽✧ ✦ ✧☾

“My birthday passed and I still haven’t gotten my color! What if I’m not meant to have a soulmate?”

You scoffed and held the papers close to your chest. “That’s not true Izu! You’re going to! Don’t be so negative. Be like All Might!” You cheered and jumped up, fist raised in the air. 

He shook his head, his green hair moving in the slightest with his motion. “Yeah you’re right. He hasn’t even said anything about his soulmate! Maybe it’s kept a secret!”

You squealed like a little school girl, which you were. “How romantic!! Keeping your lover away from the spotlight! A mysterious type of love! Imagine that!”

“What’s so cute about that? Sounds like a cheap drama to me.”

An offended gasp left your lips as you spun on your heel, stopping right in front of him. “Cheap drama?!” you bent over a bit, placing your hands on your hips, one of your hands holding your papers. “It’s more than that!”

He stumbled back at your sudden movement and gulped. You were close. Close enough where he can smell the faint essence of your shampoo. His eyes were glued to your face. Over the years he definitely saw the changes throughout your body and would even say he found himself attracted to you. 

You’ve grown from the tiny toddler that always wanted to protect him, to a maturing teenager. You also noticed the changes in Izuku’s appearance. You noticed the way his face lost its baby fat and slowly shaped itself over time. Both of your moms loved seeing you walk home together. It was something that warmed both of their children staying friends after many years. They secretly hoped that your soulmates were each other, if only the universe was nice enough to grant their wishes. 

“You listen well!” you snapped with no ill intention, somehow shuffling closer to his now trembling body. “It is romantic to protect your soulmate from the horrors of this world! Imagine just fighting for them! That’s so romantic! In the dramas, their reason for fighting is always their soulmate! If someone fought for me, I would love them forever and ever!” you swooned, clasping your hands to your chest as your fingers gripped around the vest. Your papers were long gone on the floor, your eyes squeezed shut. If they were open, he could have swore he would have seen hearts in your eyes. 

“Okay I get it!” he said quickly, hands in front of his body as he shook them in defense. “If you shut your eyes any tighter you won’t see!”

A groan left your lips as a pout tugged them right after. “I was in my dream world! Always messing with it huh, Izu!” You opened your eyes to stare at him, head tilting to the side like a confused puppy when you saw his shocked expression. 

“What?” you asked, hand reaching up to your face. “Is there something on my face or something?”

His mouth opened but no words came out, only strangled noises and gasps for air. His index finger pointed at his right eye. “Y-Your eye! It’s maroon!”

A scream left your lips as you quickly took out your phone, immediately going on the camera app to stare at your reflection. “I-It’s here! It’s here!” your voice was higher pitched, clearly in shock as you felt the back of your neck heat up. 

You lowered your phone and placed it back in your bag. “Oh my..it’s here” you whispered breathlessly, slowly lifting your head to meet Izuku’s concerned gaze. “D-Do you not like it or something?” he whispered.

Your next action startled him.  A high pitch squeal filled his ears as your hands found themselves on his wrists, squeezing them as you jumped and down, excited. “It’s here Izu!” Your head bobbed up with each jump you did, your smile never faltering as you kept using his body as leverage to jump. 

He felt his heartbreak and fall in the depths of his soul. “I’m so happy for you Y/N! I bet it’s so exciting to finally get it!”

He was truly happy for you, he was. On the inside he was already hurting. He felt like his heart got chopped up and thrown away. You had a soulmate. Someone out there was already made for you. For you to love. For them to cherish and protect you like you wanted. 

He couldn’t. He couldn’t hold you. He couldn’t cherish you. He couldn’t protect you like you wanted. You weren’t meant for him.

You stared into his gaze with your new eyes. The iris from your parents matched beautifully with the maroon. If possible, it made your eyes stand out more. “Do they look weird?” you whispered, suddenly self conscious of your new appearance. 

“Course not! I think they look-” he stopped himself, flustering up as he twiddled his thumbs. “Beautiful.”

“Ah..” you rubbed your arm, hand moving up and down slowly, lowering your head at his words. “T-thank you Izu..” you meekly whispered before gasping, reaching out and grabbing him by his forearms. “I have to tell my mom! I’ll catch up with you later?!”

☽✧ ✦ ✧☾

Enrolling at UA High School gave Izuku many opportunities. Before enrolling, he met with the Symbol of Peace himself. Gaining his quirk, Izuku worked hard to achieve his goal of entering. Seeing you at the entrance exam made him ecstatic.

That was until he would look into your eyes. Each time he dreaded looking into them. It left a grim reminder that he wasn’t for you. He remembered every moment of that day when you got the color. He remembered crying into his pillow for hours, leaving his mother worried sick. He couldn’t tell you how jealous he felt. He didn’t want to ruin your friendship.

Each kid in his class had their tattoo wrapped around their thumb or mismatched eyes. He often felt left out. He could feel the pity stares sent his way. The hushed whispers of gossipers ringing in his ears. Every time you would comfort him about it, saying it was natural to feel the way he was feeling, he couldn’t feel your comfort. It didn’t feel sincere to him. Nothing did.

He despised his birthday after his 14th. He hated the thought that this coming birthday will be the same as the one before. No trace of his soulmate. He did research. He tried forcing it by thinking of his soulmate. Would spend endless nights begging that the next day a sign would appear. 

There were times where he would come into class, absolutely exhausted as his feet dragged behind him, his shoulders slouched forward, his green and grey eyes bloodshot. It worried you to no end. You often spent nights in his dorm, comforting him. He would break down into your arms, repeating the words that no one would love him. That no one was made for him. 

When you got your signs you were over the top. You ranted and bragged about how amazing your soulmate was without even knowing them. You already knew it. Deep down you could feel their presence. It was an amazing feeling. A spark exploding inside of you that had to be let out soon. You heard stories of people finding their soulmates. How time seemed to stop leaving the two of them to drown in each other’s presence. You wanted it. 

Izuku’s birthday was today. His 17th to be exact. He was holding onto the small string of hope. You hoped that this would be different. He was at the age limit where he should have gotten the sign. You didn’t want this birthday to end with him crying again. You wanted him to be happy. He deserved it. 

It was a sunny afternoon. Izuku and you walked in silence to a park—the park where both of you had first met. A small humming came from his end, a small bounce in his step as the both of you continued to follow the cement path to a nearby bench. 

He would say it was an average morning. Despite the fact that you and Ochako decided to wake him up by singing him happy birthday and practically forcing him out of bed while he was still half asleep. He got greeted by all of his classmates, even Eri said happy birthday to which brought a big smile on his face. 

All Might came down and spoke a few words to his successor. Even Aizawa, which surprised the whole class. 

“Soo..” you spoke up, hands clasped behind your back. “Did your mom call?”

He nodded and looked up at the sky, red tresses adorning the blue sky. “She did. She was the first one to call me this morning”

“I’m surprised she didn’t stop by. I mean after all, I’m sure she could have gotten a free pass or something” 

“Yeah” he mumbled, eyes averted downwards. Something was on his mind. 

“Hey, why am I getting the feeling that you aren’t okay?”

A shrug of his shoulders made him lift his head to meet your gaze. “I’m alright. Just thinking.”

“Whatcha thinking about, Izu?”

“The normal is all.”

“Oh” was all you said as you lowered your head, regretting that you even asked him. 

His elbow gently jabbed into your side. “Don’t look so down.” A gentle smile appeared on his lips, motioning to the park bench with his head. “I still got time.” 

“Yeah you’re right about that.” you followed his footsteps from behind, placing yourself down on the wooden bench. 

A comfortable silence overcame the both of you. You leaned forward, resting your hands on your knees. “It’s been a long time hasn’t it?”

“What do you mean?” 

“Did you ever think we would be here? I mean since we were kids, I just… When I was younger I didn’t think we would be here if I’m being honest. I thought we were just going to have playdates till we drifted off once we entered high school.” 

Izuku turned his body to face you, concern evident on his face as his grey and green eyes glossed with tears. “You thought that?”

You nodded slowly as you pointed a finger towards the playground. “Do you remember? You came up to me with that bright smile of yours, asking me if we could play together. I remember we played superheroes, played on swings, and went down the slide so many times.”

A wave of nostalgia hit his body as he relaxed, leaning into the wood of the bench. “Yeah, I remember that. t’s funny how simpler times were back then huh? Not have to worry about grades, quirk sometimes, and...” he got quiet as his leg bounced up and down. “And soulmates”

“You seem to be stressing about your soulmate a lot. Izu it’ll happen. I promise. I mean you are technically of age now.”

“Yeah but what if it doesn’t happen?” he whispered, clenching the iron bar of the armrest, a small spark of his quirk emitting from his body. “What if I’m not meant for anyone? What if I’m one of those sad cases that will never ever find someone? Those pity stares keep me up at night! Everyone always talks about me like I’m not there!”

A small sob left his lips as a hand covered his eyes, shielding the small sense of dignity he had left. 

“Izu,” you whispered breathlessly, reaching out to touch him. Your fingertips touched the top of his shoulder, his body jerking away. 

“No! I don’t want you to feel bad for me! I like you! I like you so much but I’m not for you! You aren’t for me! I cry every day because you’re the one I want yet I can’t have you!”

Your vision grew blurry as you desperately rubbed your eyes with the back of your hand to conceal your tears. “You dummy..you can’t just say stuff like that!”

He sniffled as he looked over at you. “And why is that?”

You felt your heart stop. A funny feeling running through your veins. Butterflies appeared in the pit of your stomach. “Izu...” you whispered and suddenly cradled his face, your thumbs rubbing the swell of his tinted cheeks. “You- your eye.” 

His eyes widened drastically and he immediately shoved his hand into his pocket, pulling out his phone. Turning on the camera he faced it toward him as he choked on air. Green and maroon eyes. “It’s maroon,” he whispered and lowered his phone onto his lap. 

You let out a shaky breath and reached for his hand. A spark of electricity ran through your veins at the touch. His presence was clear as ever. His touch was real. It was like you were able to see clearly now. 

This was the moment everyone spoke of. The warmth of their partner touching them for the first time. The newfound wave of love exploding throughout both bodies. 

“I can’t believe it.” His eyes wandered to your hands enclosing his, focusing on his birthday tattooed on your thumb. The word and numbers adorning it. 

“Neither can I,” you replied, squeezing his hand gently. 

“There are an infinite amount of soulmates you could have had...yet you got me.”

A small smile tugged your lips as you stroked the side of his face with your knuckle. “There may be infinite amounts but I wouldn’t dream of being theirs. I only want you, Izu.”

He stood up abruptly as he held his hand out. “Well Princess, are you ready to dance and dance?”

A laugh left your lips. The moment when you were both small as you made a promise to each other replayed through your head. You could have swore you imagined a smaller version of the both of you, dancing and running around the playground behind him. A sign that everything will be alright. 

You placed your smaller hand in his, using him as leverage to stand up. 

“I’m ready to dance and dance with you until the end of time, my Prince.” 

[laurenandloki]

Oooo idea time guys and gals,

Giant boy Loki babysitting a tiny child :0

Requested by @just-more-gt-trash !! I’m sorry it took me a while to write this for you! I ended up writing the whole story today just so you didn’t have to wait any longer lol😊

Hope you like it!

——————————————————————————

~Teasing Brings Tears~

“Goodness, how did I get myself into this mess?”, said Loki aloud to himself as you clung to his finger. Loki had decided to introduce you to a couple of movies he had found in his closet because he thought that you’d enjoy them. You’ve always shown an immense amount of curiosity for someone who’s only 8 years old and Loki loved that about you. In a way, you reminded him of his younger self. Always curious, but very reserved and shy. He figured the movies would perk your interest and get you to come out of your shell.

Most importantly, he hoped that it would get you to relax more around him. You always stuttered whenever you were with Loki and he hoped to one day stop that from happening. It wasn’t because you were afraid of him. It was just because of how big he was.

Loki didn’t realize that the movies he found were all horror films. So, at the expense of his carelessness for not checking the content of the films, he was forced to let you cling onto his finger. He didn’t have the heart to tear you off of him, so he dealt with the slow loss of circulation.

“Child, can you let go of Uncle Loki?”, he said. You immediately shook your head no, shoving your face into the huge digit you had your arms wrapped around.

“I am not going anywhere, small one. I promised your mother that I would watch over you for the night and I am going to do just that”, said Loki. He had promised your mother that he’d babysit you for the night so that she can spend a few hours relaxing. He has been friends with your mother now for a few years. She lived her whole life in the Avengers Tower in secret, but once Loki moved in, he discovered her within 4 days.

Her friendship with Loki blossomed, but her relationship she had with the man she thought she’d spend the rest of her life with came to an end once he found out that he was going to be a father. Your mother was devastated. It was hard enough getting certain supplies. She never would have been able to do it all on her own if she hadn’t met Loki.

Loki was furious when he found out what happened, but soon became ecstatic when your mother told him about her pregnancy. He was over the moon! Your mother had never seen Loki so thrilled before. He vowed that he’d protect your mother and, without question, you once you were born.

The same question would be thrown at her day in and day out, “Can the little one call me ‘Uncle Loki’ once they’re brought into this world?” Your mother would always laugh and agree to let him have the title of being your uncle.

He loved playing with you. Casting illusion of different animals seemed to be your favorite thing when you were around 3 years old. Loki didn’t mind your requests. He loved seeing you play with whatever animal you wished him to make. Your mother watched from the side lines. The tight knit friendship you and Loki had was all she could have hoped for.

Anyways, Loki was sitting in his bed with blankets and pillows all around him. You sat cupped in his hands, hugging his thumb close to your body. It was the only thing keeping the tears in your eyes from escaping. You didn’t want Loki to think you were a baby.

“My dear, if you let go, I will cast illusions of your favorite animals”, said Loki. He was going to bribe you in anyway he can. Loki didn’t want to see you scared anymore, especially in his presence.

You surprisingly ignored his offer. You thought that he was just going to leave you be, but after a few seconds passed, there was suddenly a weight on your waist that was pulling you away from Loki’s thumb. You held on with all the strength you could muster up, but it just wasn’t enough. Your hands lost their hold on the thumb and you were soon being lifted up to meet the gaze of two green orbs, Loki’s eyes.

“I win”, said Loki with a smirk on his face. If anything, Loki lived up to being your uncle pretty well. Mainly due to the fact that he loved to tease you.

You didn’t say a word to him. “Oh come now, you honestly don’t think that the monster in the film is real, do you?” He paused for a brief moment so you could think that over. “Well, actually now that I mentioned it, I’m fairly sure those types of beasts live in New York-...” He felt you grip on tighter to his finger that was pinching your waist. Loki smiled mischievously.

He decided to keep on poking you with his remarks. “I have actually seen pictures of those creatures in a book back on Asgard. I do recall one of the chapters stated that they feast on children-...mortal children to be exact.”

Loki expected you to laugh, even spare him a little smile, as he joked with you. He obviously wasn’t being serious. Those monsters in the film were a complete disgrace to the ones that could be found throughout the nine realms. However, none of them ate mortal children as Loki had told you. So in the end, you honestly had nothing to be afraid of.

All he got in return were tears covering your cheeks. You started whimpering; your body visibly shaking. It was hard to keep it together when Loki told you that there really are monsters out there. You just couldn’t hold back the tears anymore.

Through your whimpers, which were getting louder, you heard Loki gasp in front of you. As quickly as you started crying, you were gently pressed against a soft, but firm, warm surface. Your eyes shot open and saw that Loki had pressed you close to his cheek, giving you a makeshift hug.

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Loki’s other hand approaching. His pointer finger extended outwards and you watched as the tip of it rested on your head and tenderly moved back and forth, stroking your soft hair.

You let it all out at this point. More tears streamed down your cheeks. You stretched out your arms as far as they could and hugged Loki back. The comfort that you were getting from Loki helped a lot.

Loki did his best to calm your nerves. He wasn’t exactly a pro when it came to empathizing with others, but when you, and even your mother, were the ones who needed a shoulder to cry on, Loki would do whatever it takes to get your mind out of its miserable state.

He slowly started to pull you away from his face. A dagger of guilt punctured his chest when he felt you try and grasp onto the skin of his cheek.

You didn’t want the hug to end yet. Facing Loki with the amount of tears that had just left your eyes wasn’t exactly how you wanted Loki to see you. You wanted to be brave for him, but right now it was hard.

Loki held you in front of his face again, gently using the pad of his finger to wipe away your tears. You sniffled as he did this, which made Loki think you were going to start balling again.

“Shh, shh, it’s alright Y/n. I was just joking, my little dove. There are no such creatures like the ones in the movie that even exist”, said Loki.

“B-But you said-...”

“Shh, shh. Forget what I said. What I said were lies. I was just teasing you.”

He pulled his finger away from your face, allowing you to wipe away the excess tears.

Silence filled the space between you and Loki. You had your hands laying in your lap as you sat cupped in Loki’s massive ones.

Loki noticed that he couldn’t feel your tiny form shaking in his hands anymore, so he asked, “Are you alright now, darling?”

You let out a shaky breath. “Y-Yes.”

Loki smiled to himself. “Oh thank the norns”, he said in a funny tone.

You giggled. Loki always knew how to make you laugh. His sarcasm was your number one favorite thing to belly laugh to. You couldn’t even think about the times Loki and your mother had thrown sarcastic replies at each other. You laughed for more than an hour that day.

“How about I choose a movie that isn’t scary? Would you like that, my dear?”, Loki asked as he lowered you down to his chest. You nodded your head yes.

“Alright. Let’s get you comfy then, shall we?” Loki tilted his hand and watched in amusement as you slid down his long fingers. You landed on his chest and almost immediately covered yourself with Loki’s shirt.

He laughed at this. “Y/n, I found the most soft blankets in the tower and yet you cover up with my shirt?”, asked Loki.

“I-It just makes me feel closer t-to you. I feel safe and protected”, you simply stated. You couldn’t see it from your position, but tears had sprung into Loki’s eyes. For Loki to know that you, the smallest being he had ever conversed with, felt safe with him, was the one thing he was most proud of. Many beings that were his size feared him, yet here you were.

“That means more to me than you know, little Y/n. Thank you”, said Loki. You smiled up at the giant god and curled up in a ball. The warmth that radiated off of Loki was much better than any blanket that you covered up with.

“O-Oh! Loki?”, you shyly said. He looked away from the television across the room and down at you with a questioning look.

“Can you c-cup your hand over me?”, you asked.

“Of course I can, sweetheart”, he said. Loki gently rested his hand over you. His hand was so big, he could cover your entire body and no one would be able to tell if there was a little borrower underneath it. He loved how tiny you were.

You could hear the movie that Loki decided to play begin, but sleep decided to take over instead.

Loki smiled from above you. “Good night, my little, brave Y/n. Your Uncle Loki will be here when you wake up. Sleep well.”

[marvelslut16]

Almost lost him

Pairing: James ‘Rhodey’ Rhodes x Stark!reader 

Synopsis: Tony’s little sister had always had feelings for one James R. Rhodes. She’s kept it a secret for years, but will everything come out after he is injured during the fight against Cap?

word count: 2.4k+

Warnings: Brief cannon violence. Angst. Mentions paralysis. Swearing. Age gap. Also I have a specific age for the character mentioned. 

A/N: This has been sitting in my WIP’s for over a year because I loved it so much and I didn’t want to end it poorly lmao. I know no ones gonna read it since he isn’t a popular character, but oh well. I love this fic and I love Rhodey so that’s all that matters. 

Tony and (Y/N) Stark have saved the world from terrorists once again.

“Can you believe this title?” you laugh showing Rhodey the article on your phone. 

“I was there too,” he says gruffly. 

“You just aren’t special enough,” you tease, sticking your tongue out like you’re five and not thirty-six. 

“Not everyone’s lucky enough to be a Stark,” Tony, your annoying but lovable older brother, enters the compound’s kitchen.

Tony took you under his wing and raised you since your parents died. It was a lot for a twenty-one year old to handle, no one he knew had to take care of an eleven year old. Especially one with newly discovered powers. They weren’t much, but when emotions would get overwhelming you would have white colored beams come from your hands. This later helped Tony come up with the idea for the repulsors on his Iron Man suit, which you helped him build.

As the years passed, you got a better hold on your new found powers. The more you and Tony dug into your parents past, you started to think that your dad had either given you something when you were a baby or your mom was given something while pregnant to make you like this. Your Dad always called you special, but you never thought you were this special.

“Any progress with Steve?” you ask hopefully. You know how much Tony values his friendship with Cap, he just won’t admit it. Especially because he’s hurt. 

“No,” he grunts, but tries to brush it off like he doesn’t care. You and Rhodey give each other unamused looks, clearly not believing the bullshit Tony is trying to feed you.

“I think you should try to reach out to him again, you clearly miss him Tony,” you frown at the dark haired man in front of you.

“I agree with (Y/N/N),” Rhodey speaks up from behind you. He’s closer than you remember, and you shiver as you feel the little licks of his breath on your neck as he speaks. 

“You love birds can shut up now,” Tony rolls his eyes, he leaves the kitchen without anything. 

Heat immediately rushes to your face and you can’t look Rhodey in the eye as you stutter out an apology for Tony’s actions. You quickly leave the kitchen before he can respond, wanting to put distance between your blushing self and the man you had been in love with for years. 

-- 

You had hoped that the conversation in the kitchen would have convinced Tony to reach out and make amends with Steve and half of the Avengers. But things only continued to escalate, where it seemed a battle between friends was unavoidable. So that's how you ended up in Germany, with your newest recruit Spider-Man, facing off against the people you cared most about in this world.

“Rhodey!” you scream as you watch him plummet to the Earth. Time seems to slow to a near standstill and all you can do is watch, too far away from him to be able to help somehow. Your knees buckle and you hit the ground at the same time his body does. There's a scream that’s so loud it rattles the windows of the airport hanger, a scream you weren’t even aware left your own lips. 

Vision tries to approach you, but you let out a sound that's between a sob and a scream as he gets closer. You’re angry, and scared, you can feel a rush of something in your veins. You ball your hands in fists, bringing them to your chest as you curl into yourself. 

The sound of metal crunching together pulls you from your rocking back and forth on your knees. You see a white glow, one that you're extremely familiar with, dissipating from around two shipping containers, now crushed together where vision was hovering. If he had stayed solid, he would have been crushed. You’re shaking even more as you stare down at your hands, you had never been able to move objects before. You could have hurt somebody. You can’t dwell on it too long because Peter runs to your side, telling you that Rhodey had a heartbeat and help was on the way. 

It had felt like hours since Tony, Peter, and you had landed back down in the states. Dr. Cho was working with a spine specialist and a neurosurgeon to figure out the extent of the damage. After a while, they had updated you three, telling you that Rhodey broke his spine and they were taking him into surgery. Tony had left to go fiddle with one of his suits, his coping mechanism. He left the kid with you because he didn’t want you alone. 

“How did you two meet?” Peter breaks the silence.

“Hmm?” you look away from the painting in front of you for the first time since you sat in the waiting room chair, to look at the boy. 

“Mr. Rhodes, how did you two meet?” he clarifies. 

“That’s a long story,” your eyes glaze over as memories start to come flooding back.

“I have time,” Peter gives you a small smile, you can really see what Tony see’s in the kid. The kindness that his Aunt May has taught him is abundantly clear, you know he’s only asking for your benefit.

“He met Tony when they went to MIT together, he somehow found a way to put up with my brother's antics. I didn’t meet him until two years after Tony graduated, so I was eleven,” you let out a little laugh as you realize just how long the older man has been in your life, and in your heart. “He came to my parents funeral for support for Tony, but he became my support system. Everyone seemed to ignore me and go straight for the golden boy, but Tony became too overwhelmed quickly. He introduced me to Rhodey who was the first one, besides Tony of course, to ask me how I was. He ended up spending the entire wake and funeral with me, giving me support and effectively distracting me from my pain.”

You look over at the younger boy, who seems to be staring at you with fascination. He sees the pain on your face when you stop talking, reaching over he grabs your hand loosely. Testing the waters to see if you’ll pull away from affection like Tony has with him. You give him a thankful smile and hold his hand before continuing your story.

“He joined the military not long after that. At first I would send him care packages and letters so he didn’t feel alone when he was deployed. One day when I was writing a letter one of Tony’s flings came into the kitchen and called me a pathetic child because I was crushing on Tony’s friend after I explained what I was doing. He never got that letter, or any after that. We didn’t really talk much after that, if he came to visit Tony I’d be pleasant before locking myself in my room. I guess I was embarrassed over my school girl crush. Years passed, lots of years, before Tony went missing, James was the one that told me what happened. And in those following months he would rarely leave my side, he wanted to make sure I was okay. We were finally both adults, and we gained a real friendship.” 

“That sounds like more than a friendship,” Peter sends you an innocent look. You furrow your eyebrows at him in response, Rhodey definitely doesn’t like you back. “I’m just saying, if Liz was like that with me I would be ecstatic that she liked me back.”

“He sees me as a little sister, Peter,” your heart breaking a little more knowing that you’ll never be able to be with the man you’ve loved for years. Before Peter can refute you, Rhodey’s Neurosurgeon walks into the waiting room- some guy named Dr. Strange. 

“How is he?” you jump out of your seat, Peter quickly following suit, his hand falling from yours at the movement. 

“He’s out of surgery Miss. Stark,” his voice coming out as cocky and full of himself, like he’s overly proud that he did this surgery. “But the recovery will be the difficult part.”

“What happened? What’s still wrong? And when can I see him?” you’re shooting out questions faster than the surgeon can answer.

“I’m not at liberty to discuss that with you Miss. Stark, and you can’t see him until he’s out of the ICU,” the smug look is still on the surgeon's face, making you grow angrier with each word that leaves his mouth. 

“Excuse me?” Peter looks between you and the surgeon with wide curious eyes. 

“You aren’t family,” he states matter-of-factly. “Therefore I can’t tell you and you can’t see him.”

Your eye twitches in anger as your body starts to warm, your powers start to react to the strong emotion. You take a deep calming breath, keeping you from accidentally lashing out at the surgeon. 

“I suggest you rethink that answer,” you say deathly calm, Peter stares at you in awe as you talk back to the man. “And consider who paid for all of the new state-of-the-art Stark technology and equipment you have in this hospital. Things I’m sure that you used in that surgery, that I donated to this hospital through the outreach program that I created. Technology created by both me and my brother.”

“Is there a problem here?” a man’s voice comes from behind you, he sounds irritated that someone’s making a scene. You turn around to face the man, who is wearing a badge that says medical director on it. Perfect. His eyes widen as soon as he recognizes who you are. 

“Actually there is,” you frown. “My colleague, my friend. My favorite person after my brother really, he just had a pretty big surgery, but your surgeon here won’t tell me any details or let me go see him. So yes, we have a huge problem.”

“I’m so sorry Miss. Stark,” he exclaims. “Why don’t we go update you in private.” 

“Did I sound like a bitch?” you frown, whispering to Peter as the two of you follow the MD and the surgeon. He nods a little with a smirk adorning his face. 

“But it was awesome!” you grin at the young boy, remembering the excitement you felt when you saw Tony use his name to get what he wanted for the first time. 

“He’s paralyzed,” the surgeon throws the statement around like it isn’t a big deal as soon as the four of you enter a separate room. “From the waist down. There was nothing we could do.”

Your heart and your lungs seem to stop working at the same time. Peter discreetly uses his super strength to catch you as your legs give out at the surgeon's words. Tears start to pour down your face as you realize all of the things Rhodey will never be able to again. Like never being able to help defend his country again, or chase after you when you steal the last cookie that he wanted. 

You can’t help but feel guilty. If he had never met you and Tony he would be fine. He would still be able to do what he loves. He never would have been put in that situation. He’ll never be able to walk again. He won’t have the opportunity to dance at his wedding or chase his children around if he decided to have either of those. 

“I know it’s a lot Miss. Stark,” the MD’s voice is muffled. “But there was nothing we could have done-”

“When can I see him?” you cut the doctor off. 

“I could take you to him now,” he glares at the surgeon. “He won’t wake for at least a few more hours.”

“Peter, go call Tony and tell him the update,” you look at the young boy, he gives your hand a reassuring squeeze before heading back to the waiting room. 

The surgeon and the MD both ramble on about Rhodey’s condition but their voices sound muffled- like you’re underwater. You feel like you're suffocating in all the pain and grief you feel for the love of your life. He’s lying on the bed, oxygen tubing up his nose, at least ten wires connected to him, and the disgusting beep of his heart monitor reminds you how lucky you are that he’s still here with you. 

The two men quickly leave you with Rhodey, but not before the MD promises that he’ll be under constant supervision and he’ll receive the best treatments they offer. Not that you're shocked to hear that with the scene you cause in the waiting room. You grab Rhodey’s hand, careful to avoid yanking the IV in it, pulling his hand up to your mouth to give it a feather light kiss. Tears slip down your cheeks as you stare at his still body, you were so close to losing him today. 

The tears have stopped by the time Tony shows up close to an hour later, he had dropped Peter off at home before coming up to the hospital room. Your older brother looks as distressed as you feel, although he seems to be tryin to hide it more than you are. 

“How is he?” his voice is quieter than you imagined, like he’s afraid any louder will make you crumble. 

“Stable,” your voice is monotonous, and you refuse to tear your eye’s from Rhodey’s face as you respond to Tony. “About as good as he could be I guess.”

“How are you?” he cuts you off as you go to respond that you're fine. “And don’t bullshit me (Y/N/N), you’ve been in love with him since you were eleven. How are you feeling?”

You don’t respond, not with words at least. Instead you do crumble, letting out a quiet sob as you grip Tony’s hand that he was about to place on your shoulder. Tony runs his free hand through your hair and down your back, trying to soothe you like he used to when you would have nightmares after your parents deaths. 

“We almost lost him today Tony, I almost lost him-” another sob racks through your body. “And now he’s paralyzed. He can never walk again, can never defend his Country again. And for what? A disagreement between you and Steve? We could have lost him Tony for something so fucking stupid.”

Before Tony can respond, a muffled voice breaks through the tension in the room. The voice is gravely, but one you love so dearly, it’s Rhodey’s. “(Y/N)?”

Permeant tags: @crimson-knuckled-queen​ @rexorangecouny @mrs-malfoy-always​

[illyaana]

Homebound to you - Sasha Blaus

I can't find the artist on Tumblr (again (＞人＜；)) but this is the twitter post!

Synopsis: You are childhood friends with Sasha. This part is on how you grew up with Sasha and how she told you how she's joining the Training Corps. (if I tell anymore, it isn't a synopsis welp-)

Tags: Sasha x Binaural Reader, Fluff, SFW

Word Count: 2226

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Fanfiction Masterlist

The lush meadows of Dauper Village - the place both you called home.

It wasn’t one that you’d see written in the papers about its beauty. It was a hidden gem known by those who were willing to venture out and seek it. The forest welcomed you - the sounds of the woodland creatures and the wind against the bushes reminded you of life when you believed the world was much more peaceful than it was. The scene of an ocean blue stream of water surrounded by small animals was vivid in your memories.

“You don’t want to join me? It isn’t that dirty, trust me,” a 6-year-old Sasha said, gripping tightly onto the ends of your shirt.

Sasha Braus - the girl you’ve known ever since you were a kid.

No one could imagine the daughter of a hunter being friends - close friends - with the child of a scholar, but you both proved them wrong.

Sasha was your first ever friend. She was the one who made the introverted you more social with others.

She was the first person you truly cared for - nothing could’ve changed that.

Sasha played along a stream of water right beside the willow tree you both found the first time you ventured into the forest. She’d jump feet first into the stream, diverting the flow of water into multiple small streams before converging in the front of her feet. She loved seeing the small fishes play with each other as if they were racing to meet a bigger water source.

She’d beg you to join her in the small game - but you never did.

You wanted to steal every single moment with her in your eyes - to let it sink into the deepest parts of your brain.

“I’d rather stay dry, Sasha. My mom would kill me if I go back home with my clothes all wet,” your younger self said, trying to reason with her.

Sasha’s face immediately paled the minute you finished that sentence. She looked to her now soaked trousers. A ring of dried mud formed on the top half of her trousers decorated with dried leaves and vines.

“Why didn’t you warn me earlier?” she said, anger stricken on her face, “Mama is going to kill me now. I didn’t expect it to be this dirty.”

You chuckle at the red-faced girl in front of you.

This girl was meant for greatness - no one could deny that.

The adventurous side of hers could never be tamed.

It was wild and relentless - and you loved it to bits.

“You’re wearing shorts underneath, right?”

She nodded.

You sighed.

“Take off the trousers. I’ll wash them as best as I can and you sling it on your shoulder so that it can dry. That’s the best I can offer,” you told her.

In an instant, she ran to the bushes, took off her trousers and tossed them to you.

“You’re only 6-years old - how can you think like an adult at such a young age?” she said, an inquisitive look painted on her face.

“I grew up surrounding playful 6-year-olds, that’s why,” you said, teasing her, “I basically became their mom - looking after them, making sure they behaved well in public - I did it all.”

As time passed, Sasha became more than just a friend you used to look after.

You both became each others’ rocks - the very thing that kept each other from falling.

Sasha learnt how to hunt - to survive in the harsher world of the forest.

You learnt knowledge - to create and to move the world with a pen and paper.

You never saw Sasha hunt but you’ve pictured it billions of times.

You pictured her hazel-colored hair dancing in the air as she rode her horse. Her golden-brown eyes would focus solely on her target - they would force her victim to shudder and slow down, to become hers. Her muscles would flex under her thin shirt as he pulled the arrow in her hands against the bow - the tip fixed exactly at the weak point of her target. Then, with one swift release, her victim would fall and a rush of happiness would surge within her.

You could only draw it and picture it in your head, but how you wished to see her in action.

She’d always bring a huge portion of the meat she gained for your family. She’d say she caught more than she expected, but you could hear the rumbles from her parents.

Eventually, your families decided to move into one house to reduce the problems faced by the Braus family.

Your family would provide the income - the money to buy resources. The Braus family would help in gaining food and rationing out how much from the resources to use.

Even though your parents hated the idea of moving in with hunters, you were ecstatic.

You imagined a life with Sasha, and you were going to get a glimpse of it.

Every night, she’d come into your room with a cup of tea and talk about her hunt. You, on the other hand, would talk about what you’ve learnt for the day. Even though she never understood what you spoke on, she’d try her best to listen and even ask questions when she didn’t understand.

You taught Sasha how to use a quill while she taught you the wonders of the wild.

Sasha entered your room in the middle of the night. She had her blanket wrapped around her as she held two mugs of tea.

She saw how you continued to study throughout the night. You’d use an oil lamp as a light source as you crammed for all the future tests and exams you were going to face.

She hated the sight of you slowly losing energy. The eyebags under your eyes intensified each day. You didn’t smile as much as you used to. You lost the energy you had when you were younger.

Yet Sasha managed to keep hers, just like you wanted.

“Tea break?” she suggested, pushing a mug into your hands, “I caught a deer today! Tomorrow, you’re eating venison - get ready!”

You shook your head in denial as you placed the mug on the table.

“I swear, Y/N,” she started, agitation clear in your voice, “I will burn all your books if you don’t stop and drink tea with me right now.”

You knew Sasha’s threatens were to be taken seriously. She seriously once burned an essay you needed to hand in the next day.

You immediately closed your book and placed the hot cup of Chamomile tea in your hands. The mug itself gave you warmth, making you sigh in content.

Sasha hopped on your bed, dropping the blanket to her sides. She closed her eyes as she brought the cup of hot tea to her nose, taking it in.

You swear that she almost looked like an angel at that moment.

Her soft locks now reached her shoulders - messy and tousled. The pale moonlight against her skin highlighted her features. The gold flecks in her eyes against the hazel shined - it even showed against the steam wafting from the cup. The scar on her left shoulder from one of her hunts showed through the almost see-through shirt, showing how strong she was as a warrior.

You smiled, leaning against your chair while taking in the beauty in front of you.

“Y/N?” Sasha called.

“Yeah?”

“When are you free?”

“I should be free by this Friday, my exams end then.”

“Oh...” she said, trailing off.

You walk to sit beside her and place your head on your shoulder. You felt her relax as he placed her head on top of yours.

“Is everything good?”

She begins rubbing her head against yours.

“I’m good. I’m just worried about the future, that’s all.”

“The world must be ending,” you joke, “You’re actually thinking ahead.”

Sasha flicked your forehead, “Stupid - of course, I need to!”

A silence formed between the two of you as you both stared at the sky from your windows. It was pitch black. Stars twinkled against the black canvas, dancing to a song only they knew. The clouds tried their best to hide the beauty of the night, but their efforts were in vain.

“I’m thinking of joining the Training Corps,” Sasha said, cutting the silence.

Your face paled.

“What?” you froze.

“I hate hiding in fear, Y/N. I hate the fact we stay hiding away from the thing that threatens our lives. We should be killing it rather than just killing animals for meat,” she said with a serious voice.

You put both of your finished mugs on the floor and grab Sasha’s hands, forcing her to face you.

“Sasha, you might die. You might never see your parents again, you might lose everything,” tears form in your eyes, “I can’t lose you, Sasha - not now, not ever.”

She smiles while wiping the formed tears in your eyes.

“Bold of you to assume I’ll die the minute I see Titans,” she says.

She pulls you out of the bed, dusting off her shirt.

“We’re going out for a while. Get ready for an adventure after so many years, Y/N L/N.”

You both snuck out of the house and got on her horse. With one nudge from her, you both rode off into the forest. Through the dark greens emerged fireflies that lit the view before you. You spotted the eventful stream, the sleeping woodland creatures and the plants that reminded you of your childhood.

You turned to face the back of Sasha, and you were in awe.

She looked exactly like how you pictured her to look.

Her dancing hair, her flowing skirt, her smile - everything - it was what you imagined.

You wrapped your arms around her waist, pulling yourself closer to you. You pressed your head against her back, earning a chuckle from the horse rider.

“You better come home to me, Sasha Braus. I will never forgive you if you don’t.”

“As if I won’t.”

She signaled the horse to stop at the willow tree you used to spend most of your childhood days at.

She gets off the horse and runs to the tree. Her fingers slowly graze the tree, reminiscing all the memories you both have made right here.

“You know,” she started, “I used to stare at you reading those books of yours under this tree. The wind would blow softly for you when you perched yourself under the tree, but the vines of leaves at its branches would move so much. It was as if they were dancing for you. Even if I brought a drink or a snack, you’d just give me your portion and continue to read those books, but when I wanted you to talk to me, you’d instantly put the book down and give all your attention to me.”

“Well,” you say, “I’d always look up once in a while and see you play with the animals in that little bush there,” you point at the bush covered by fireflies, “I’d see you try picking up squirrels and capture butterflies wondering what goes on in your head.”

You get off the horse and walk towards Sasha.

“I’ll miss this the most when I leave, I think. This small haven we made from trees will always be my first home.”

You hug Sasha from behind, gripping onto her loose shirt.

“It’s happening, isn’t it? I can’t talk you out of it, can I?” you say, sniffles stopping you from speaking clearly.

She shook her head and you sigh, feeling defeated.

“Y/N, pass those exams and get into the Royal Capital. I will enter the Military Police and I’ll meet you within Wall Sheena.”

“I’ll try to get everyone to move. Then, we all will be together again,” you say, building your resolve.

Sasha turns to face you. The minute she sees you, she begins to laugh hysterically.

“You look like a lost puppy,” she says as she touches your cheek, “I’ll miss you, Y/N.”

You press your foreheads against each other. You both instinctively close your eyes, enjoying the small moment you two were sharing.

You couldn’t imagine how your life was going to be without the bubbly presence only Sasha could give. To think there would be no more random rendezvous, no more jokes and no more stories from the girl in front of you made you feel the pain you didn’t want anyone to feel.

But you knew that Sasha had aspirations and dreams - you were in no place to stop her, even if her life was on the line.

The only thing you could do was to cherish this little moment with her before years without her begin.

Soon, a swarm of fireflies surrounded the two of you, giving you a clear view of the woman before you. The bright, flickering lights enhanced the raw beauty only Sasha exemplified. Her eyes stared into yours, begging you to say something.

It was only fair to do this now. If it didn’t happen now, you don’t know when you’ll have the chance again.

“I love you, Sasha Braus. Ever since I was kids I-”

“I love you too, Y/N.”

Your lips met under a firefly-lit forest under the willow tree in your safe haven.

Wanna request something or just wanna talk? Go ahead and send me an ask here! If you want to send a request, please check my guidelines to see what I am comfortable with. Thanks for reading <3

[tuancore]

Lost You (Part 13) :

Starring- Jinyoung x reader

Genre- Heavy angst, self harm.

Summary- It's your choices and actions which made you miserable.

Gladly Jackson brought his car otherwise rest of them would have been walking to their houses right now, "Jackson....we are sorry for not believing in you........we genuinely are" Mark sighed, staring at Jackson as he drove. Shaking his head lightly with a small smile, Jackson spoke, "Hyung it's okay, everything was really pointing out at me and we purposely made it look like I'm behind all of this...right Yugyeomie".

"Yeps....." Yugyeom chuckled, "You knew everything from the start!?" Mark asked, his tone laced with shock. Seeing Mark's and JB's eyes widened like some fungus Jackson and Yugyeom chuckled.

"Actually Jackson hyung was the one who figured out Youngjae hyung's handwriting on that card, from there all three of us decided to portray as Jackson hyung is the one behind all of this so Youngjae hyung wouldn't doubt us" Yugyeom explained with a slight grin, "What about Jackson meeting up with Jisoo?" JB inquired hastily.

"Oh that" Jackson chorused aloud, "The night when you guys kicked me out, Youngjae messaged me showing his concern, so just to test him further I told him that I'll be sweating on gym—".

"And just like that I proposed the idea to follow Jisoo, we didn't really think that he'll get on proving Jackson hyung as the culprit but he did by sending Jisoo there" Yugyeom added as a matter of fact.

"What about the other girl that Jackson met at the café?"

"The girl was Minyoung..." Yugyeom laughed like crazy, poking Jackson's shoulder, "Shut up Brownie" Jackson glared at the younger, making the others smile in return.

"What do you guys think will she forgive Jinyoung?" JB asked worriedly, exchanging looks with Jackson, Yugyeom replied sternly, "The damage is already done, the way he hurt Noona is no joke and to be very honest I don't want Noona to forgive him".

_____________

"I'M SORRY ANGEL...... I'M SO SO SO SORRY......"

Upon hearing his voice, your tears stopped spilling out all of a sudden, but your heart picked up the pace making it hard to breathe, a knot forming in your throat. Brushing your locks back angrily, you walked towards the door but didn't open it, you didn't want to and you won't.

"STOP CALLING ME THAT!" You growled vehemently standing right in front of your door, "NOW YOU THINK THAT A SLUT CAN BE AN ANGEL!".

Jinyoung sobbed harder, his painful whimpers loud enough for you to hear, of course you didn't ignore his whimpers and you hated yourself for still caring for him, you hated the fact how much you always have loved him and how much you still did, that the mere thought of him crying made your insides churn in pain, but unfortunately he didn't feel the same, back then when you cried like anything on your knees he didn't dare to spare you even a drop of mercy and it hurt you, bad, real bad.

"Please don't say that.....please" He croaked out, plopping down on the floor, his back pressed against the door. Trying to gulp down some of your pain, you spat, "Why not? Wasn't it you......who called.....me..... a.....slut.....". At this point all he wanted was the ground to swallow him whole, he cursed at himself for calling you such a terrible thing. "I'm sorry.... I promise I didn't.......mean it......" He clasped his hands hoping for you to accept his apology, "Please....Forgive Me, please give me one more chance.....".

"One more chance? Huh? For what? To not to trust me again? To not to love me enough to hear me out? To break me into pieces all over again?!" Your each word pushing the dagger of hurt and guilt deeper into his heart, "No, I won't do it ever again, I won't. I was an asshole for not trusting you, for not letting you explain but I'll never repeat the same mistake ever again, I'M SORRY! I'M SORRY!".

His throaty voice was now starting to get to you, your heart stung at his sobs and apologies. But the amount of scars and stabs he has given you was much severe than his and he has to know what you went through in these past two months without him. As difficult it was to voice out your sad times in front of him, you encouraged yourself to do it.

"I wish everything could be placed back as it was before with a single sorry" You chuckled dryly, no humour in it, feeling your legs wobbly you slid down the door with your back pressed against the door same as him. Jinyoung hugged his knees to his chest, his head ducked down, with tears soaking the fabric of his knee area.

"Jinyoung-shi...." You called out with a dry laugh unable to believe that you'll ever use this on him, his breath hitching at your words. You once told him, that you don't like calling people by their first name but always used the prefix 'shi' for the one' you didn't know well or you were awkward with, even if they are younger than you.

"How funny, the one I loved is the one who became unknown to me......anyways Jinyoung-shi I hope you have time in hand, and if you don't mind hearing tales".

"Two months ago, when you started staying at office during nights with the same excuse again and again, that you've to finish you paperworks. I didn't complaint even once. Did I?....." You asked softly, all he could come up with was a hum.

"You know why?..... because I trusted you, because I loved you......I thought you were saying the truth but in reality......you were warming up some other girl's bed, while I craved for your presence every now and then......hoped with everyday to see your smiling face and just recoil in your arms which I proudly called home. Instead what I failed to notice was, you already kicked me out replacing me with someone else....." You choked on your tears which you held in with all your might, how can you not cry. Just how?

"BamBam and Lisa told me about you cheating on me with your own secretary, but I yelled at them, for them to be wrong that they mistook you as someone else. You were my pride Jinyoung.....You were my everything. Do you have any idea......how much I loved you......do you?....." Your vision blurred with tears streaming heavily down your face and neck, "That's not what I am hurt about...I'm hurt because you never loved me the way I did. It wasn't the love that I wanted to keep for my entire life, to cherish it with my life. You proved me so wrong so—" Unable to speak further you sobbed hard, the whole place echoed with your's and his' cries.

"I know baby, please let me in again, let me try to fix the things again.....give me one last chance. It doesn't matter how much I beg for you to forgive me, not a thing will change but I promise to love you the way you want, the way you always deserved......be mine again......for all the times we were together, please" He coughed out painfully.

Shaking your head vigorously, you replied hastily, "I was ready to forgive you back then even when you cheated on me because I didn't want our child.......oh sorry, My child" You purposely empathized on 'My'. "To grow up without a father, I was ready to reconcile and try out things anew.....then again,you called my child a filth.........you accused me of sleeping with different men out there, tell me Jinyoung. Did you ever hold any respect for me? Was I that low of a woman? And because of you only. I lost my only hope of living, my child".

"No. You never were, you can never be! I was the selfish one, I'm sorry for hurting our child, for being the reason for our child t—".

"MY CHILD!" You interrupted him with an inhumane growl, you won't let this man call your child his child anymore, after he openly denied that it was his child. Neither can you ever forget that he is the one to take away your child from you, "My child! It was only my child! Do you fucking hear me Park Jinyoung? It was my child.....which you took away from me. You are the reason my baby left me! You hurt my child by saying it wasn't yours!!!".

"I'm sorry....I'm sorry" Jinyoung continued to chant his apologies, sobbing and sniffing, as much as it was hurting him hearing your venomous words he had to endure everything. After all his pain stood nowhere compared to yours. He felt like the worst person alive, how could he go around cheating on you so freely without thinking about your feelings one? How could he say that you slept with men behind him?

"Your sorry won't bring my child back" You smiled remembering the time when you found out that you were carrying a mini you and Jinyoung, "You know how ecstatic I was to find out that I was pregnant that finally you were going to be a father, we were going to be parents, it was your dream to have kids, I couldn't wait to break the news to you while you were busy fucking Jisoo, I waited for you to let you know face-to-face but you never came home, all that came to me was the news of you cheating on me, then also I believed in you so blindly, I'm a fucking bitch to be so blinded by your lies! I cried every night to sleep, engulfed in coldness........talking to our child for everything to be alright, and this is where my hope led me to.......".

"I know I broke you so bad, but let me be the one to fix you again, I knew I was hurting you but I—"

Cutting him in the midway, you laughed, "You knew what you were doing will hurt me, but somehow it didn't stop you from doing what you did! Gosh! Jinyoung I seriously can't believe I fell for a guy like you! I loved a man like you for these past five years like crazy! For what? Just to not be loved the same way? Only to get betrayed at the end!".

"I don't love Jisoo! Nothing was about her! It was always you, it's still you and it always will be! You are it for me baby! Trust me!" He yelled aloud showing his desperation for you, determined to not to let you go, "I always loved you! I still love you! And I always will, you're the only woman I'll ever love!".

"Stop! Stop! Just stop! I don't want to hear your lies anymore! If you really loved me that much then didn't your love scream to trust me! Didn't suffocate you before you found your way in between her legs! " You screamed back, grabbing your scalp harshly, kicking the vase behind the door.

"I'll not ask you to forgive me anymore, but please give me a last chance to prove that I can be your old Nyoungie again! I will never hurt you again! I love you and forever will! " He stammered pressing his head onto the door, hearing your sniffs.

"I don't want to hear that you love me, you made me hate Love! You took everything from me, because of you I've turned into a person I don't even recognise" You shouted cupping your face messily wiping your fresh tears, "Why did you do this to me? Why ? Just why? Tell me what about me made you not trust me enough? What was I even lacking?!"

"You never lacked anything, you were more than enough for me baby".

"THEN WHY YOUR ACTIONS DIDN'T MATCH WITH YOUR WORDS WHY?!!! PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE LIKE YOU DID FOR THESE TWO MONTHS!"

"PLEASE DON'T SAY THAT, I can't live without you angel...." He pleaded softly knocking on the door, "Then move on, you decided to step on our love, you drained all trust and love out of me in the most brutal way possible, there's no love left in me.........anyways it won't be difficult for you to move on, how confidently you said that you love Jisoo now and that I'm trying to break you both off because I can't see you happy for once, now I'm only telling you to go back to her".

"Don't come to me now Jinyoung, Don't.....just go where your happiness resides..." Your throat burning with all the sobbing.

"I never loved her, I never will!—".

"Didn't you notice how much it hurt me when you believed her that I tried to kill her! That my tears were a lie, my whole self was a lie! I begged you Jinyoung, I fucking begged you on my knees but that was also not enough, you went so far as to slap me! It was the absolute last straw" You explained him your feelings in the most calm way possible, "The person I fell in love was the most caring out there, he couldn't see a drop of tear in my eyes, he vowed to be the best partner ever. Instead the Jinyoung I saw at Jisoo's house was.....just someone else......so animalistic......so carnal, you raised your hand on me Jinyoung and for what? Telling you the truth!! I don't need you in my life".

Jinyoung stared at his right palm with which he slapped you, he was so ashamed of himself for hitting you, You are right, he wasn't the same Jinyoung you fell in love with.

"Why? Why did you even come into my life? I was so well without you! You.....You are not my Jinyoung......my Nyoungie couldn't even think about hurting me, but you fucking killed me, it's only my body left, my soul has already died".

"I AM A FUCKING MONSTER FOR HITTING YOU! I'M A FUCKING ASSHOLE, HOW COULD I DO THIS? YOU'RE RIGHT BABY, DON'T FORGIVE ME! I ABSOLUTELY DESERVE THIS! FOR BEING THE WORST FIANCÉ EVER! FOR BEING THE WORST FATHER EVER!" He yelled aloud in a carnal tone, because he wasn't irritated by you but was angry at himself, for ruining his life with his own hands, wiping his tears harshly.

"Angel.....all I want you to know is I'm genuinely sorry for everything and ashamed of my whole existence, I will no longer budge you or show you my terrible face, I'll leave you like you want, but I'll always love you remember that....." His demeanor changing completely as he whispered softly, loud enough for you to hear from another side of the door, standing up on his feet to leave, Hot tears streamed down your face. He is leaving, isn't this what you wanted, to not to be his anymore. Then why were you crying for him.

Listening to his words, something lit up inside your chest, your heart beating erratically all over again, you went completely pale, hands and legs feeling as heavy as a metal, you didn't want to forgive him, for what he has done to you and your child. Then again, why was his words hurting you all over again, it felt all of your bones were breaking at the same time and you just couldn't bare it any longer. He hurt you so much but why did you still want to hold onto him.

All your heart chorused was his name on an infinite loop, Park Jinyoung. He is it for you, there's no doubt in that, from your head to toe, from your heart to soul, you were bounded to this man and atleast not in this lifetime you will be able to separate from him.

You don't know what was from his side, but from your side it was an unconditional love, a love that bloomed in a millennium.

Your eyes landed on one of the shards of the vase which you kicked before, picking it up you did what you never thought you ever would.

Jinyoung snapped his head at the sound of the door unlocking, you stumbled your way in front of him before hugging him tightly leaving no space for air. He hugged you back with the same intensity kissing the side of your head.

"Jinyoung I want to hate you but I don't know why my love for you is stronger than that....." You whispered into his chest, "I love you too baby", he replied in a heartbeat, peppering your head with chaste kisses.

"I love you but I can't bare to be in love with you anymore, I can't see you walking away from me, leaving me, I can't live without you, but I also don't want to live with you......I'm sorry that I couldn't find an easier way to end my misery...." You murmured with a strangled breath, before darkness swallowed you a whole, your body fell limp in his arms. He panicked at your unconscious form, shaking you lightly he tried to wake you up, but upon not getting any reaction. He called your name impatiently multiple times, lightly patting your cheeks, and that's when his gaze went to your hand, his blood ran cold, his heart almost stopping, seeing blood spurting out from your wrist, dripping down on the floor.

Part 12 // Part 13 // Part 14

______________________________________

[scribomaniac]

Something Wicca This Way Comes Ch 14

Grunting as the air was knocked from her lungs, Emma somersaulted behind a chair in the attic, just barely dodging a fireball. Closing her eyes and her fist, she tried to pull on her new powers. Nothing.

Feeling a shadow fall over her, Emma’s eyes snapped open and she found a shadowy figure looming over her. Curling back her lips, she decided to switch tactics. Roaring with rage, Emma launched her self at their torso and tackled them to the ground. The figure let out a shrilly scream and then the shadows around it receded to reveal Tink.

The white-lighter grimaced up at Emma, “Not bad,” she wheezed, “but I don’t think that will work against the actual Source.”

Breathing heavily, Emma shrugged, “Never know until you try, right?” Emma helped the smaller woman up, then pushed the hair away from her face. “And I’m sorry but I just can’t take you seriously. I know this,” she waved at Tink, referencing the previous transformation, “is supposed to make me feel like I’m actually in danger but it really doesn’t.”

Tink did a good job turning herself into a menacing figure, and had nailed the illusion of fireballs and energy balls, but in the end, Emma knew it was all fake and that the woman would never intentionally hurt her.

“Well you’ve got to learn how to use your powers on command, Emma!” Tink threw her hands up, practically stomping her foot as well. “Not just when you’re in danger!”

“Yeah, well,” Emma sighed. When she’d been a Firestarter, using her powers had been so easy. That heat was always inside her, ready to overflow like lava. It hadn’t always been like that though. Her earliest memories of learning to use her magic consisted of Rumpelstiltskin screaming and threatening her, backing her into a corner until he got the result he desired. It was because of that that Emma had suggested this type of training, but it didn’t seem to be working. Emma shook her head, “Maybe if you yelled more?”

A bright white light rose from the floor, interrupting their conversation. After only a few seconds Will emerged from the light, a bright smile on his face. “Hello ladies. Emma, your mom just got back.”

“Oh no you don’t,” Tink stepped in front of Emma to block her from leaving the attic. “We need to figure this out, Emma!”

“Figure what out?” Will asked, looking nervously between the two of them. Then, “Wait, your power thing?”

“The only time you’ve been able to use them so far was during the last two demon attacks.”

Emma rolled her eyes as Tink pointed at her, “Yeah, and? I can use them when it counts so what does it matter?”

“Using them when it counts and using them to defeat the Source are two different things.”

“Okay,” Will stepped in, steadfastly not making eye contact now. “Tink, ah, why don’t you go take a break. I think Liam’s down at the pub. He could probably use some help training the new bartender.” When Tink merely raised a brow at him, he waved her on, “Come on, I’ll take over the training from here.”

Narrowing her eyes, Tink asked, “You’re sure? You’re not just going to blow it off as soon as I leave?”

“Scout’s honor, now shoo.”

With a long sigh, the white-lighter relented and orbed away.

“Alright then,” Emma placed her hands on her hips. “What did you have in mind?”

Clapping his hands together, Will answered, “A break! Come on.” The youngest Jones brother led Emma over to the windows and had her sit down.

“Didn’t you just promise Tink?” Emma asked wryly. “Scout’s honor and all that?”

“A break is not the same thing as blowing it off,” Will answered easily. “Now, tell me everything you’ve tried so far.”

So Emma did. Over the past week and a half she and Tink had tried what felt like everything. Walking into pitch black rooms, using magical stimulants, asking Jones ancestors for help, even. Nothing had summoned even a spark from the Savior. Nothing, it seemed, except the pure adrenaline that came from a life or death situation.

Will hemmed and hawed at all the right times, his mouth set in a firm line as he considered her words. “And before, when you were in the Underworld, this was how you trained your powers? The Source would attack you?”

Emma shrugged, then nodded.

“And so when you used your powers after that, what did you focus on?”

“What do you mean?”

Biting down on his lip, Will was silent for a second as he thought to rephrase his question, “I mean, what did you feel when you used your powers? When you summoned fire? Scared? Happy? Emotionless?”

The answer came surprisingly easy to Emma, even though she’d hardly ever thought of it before. Softly, she answered, “Angry. I felt anger.”

Will nodded excitedly, as if that made complete sense. “Right, okay, yeah! You were angry because of how he treated you, right?”

Emma nodded slowly. It was true, she’d been angry at her life in the Underworld, but she wasn’t just angry at the Source. She’d been angry at her parents for giving her up, the Seer for making her drink that bitter tonic, Bae for watching everything happen but never helping her. And she’d been angry at herself, for never fighting back.

“So anger was the trigger then, but it isn’t now, because so much has changed, right?” Not waiting for Emma to even nod this time, the half white-lighter continued, “So we have to find the new trigger—the new emotion for you to draw on. The last time you used them, what did you feel?”

“I don’t know,” Emma tried to think back. It’d been an attack by some lesser demons, but there’d been a lot of them. David had been there too, and Emma had been worried he’d get hurt in the crossfire. “Scared, I guess. For David.”

Will’s eyes narrowed, and then he lunged and shouted in her face, “Boo!”

Startling, Emma fell back against the chair’s arm, “What the hell was that?”

“Did I scare you?”

“What?” Emma frowned, “Yes! Jeez, of course you scared me, you screamed right in my face.”

Will shrugged, “Then fear’s not the trigger.”

Emma rolled her eyes. This was going no where. Killian had once told her that Will was studying Psychology. She wondered if this was practice for him or something.

“Okay, I want to try something else.”

“Can we just go back to the training?”

“This is training,” Will insisted. “Now, close your eyes.”

Emma stared at him blankly, not deigning the request with a verbal rejection.

“I know this is hard for you, Emma,” Will said, looking straight into her eyes and forcing her to see the pure sincerity in his own. “But please, trust me. Just for a little bit.”

Pursing her lips, Emma took in a deep breath before doing as he asked.

“Okay,” Will said slowly, “now I want you to really think back to the last attack. Tell me what happened.”

This was silly. Shaking her head but keeping her eyes closed, Emma replied, “Seven lower level demons attacked the manor. Two went after you and Killian, three went after Liam, and two appeared behind David.”

Will’s voice was calm and steady as he asked, “And you were scared he was going to get hurt?” Emma nodded. “So what did you do then?”

“I ran towards him and used my power to vanquish them.”

“Okay, now I want you to reflect on that moment. The moment where you decided not to run and save yourself, but to run towards someone in danger. Did you feel anything? Did you think about it?”

Emma remembered the look on David’s face. His eyes were wide and his mouth hung open as he watched the demons work. Emma’s heart stopped dead at his expression, and then when she saw the two demons shimmer behind him, when one summoned a fireball to his hand, there hadn’t been time for second thoughts. All Emma knew was that she couldn’t let him die. Couldn’t let her father die. She needed to protect him, would do anything to protect him, even if it meant sacrificing herself to do so.

“Emma,” Will’s soft voice permeated her thoughts, “open your eyes.”

When she did, she gasped. The whole room was lit up with a golden light. Looking down at her hands, she found herself to be the source. It was beautiful and shone even brighter than a white-lighter.

Will’s grin was wider than his face could manage. It was contagious too and soon Emma felt her own smile cracking against her lips. “Looks like we found your trigger.”

Feeling like a child on Christmas morning, Emma ran down to tell Mary Margaret the news. The older witch was ecstatic by the development, immediately suggesting new methods of training and ways to manipulate Emma’s light. It was like a light switch had been turned on inside Emma’s head. By the afternoon, she was able to focus the light on her hands, control its brightness, and she’d even been able to shoot off a few bolts at small targets.

Eventually Mary Margaret had called it a day, not wanting Emma to overtire herself, and suggested they take a break—a proper one this time, Will had joked—by looking through some old family photos. Unsurprisingly, most of the photos centered around Emma’s brother, Neal.

“And here he is at his high school graduation,” Mary Margaret flipped through her phone with a soft smile on her face. “You should have seen your father when he was accepted into UCLA. I swear that smiles was screwed onto his face for weeks.”

Emma hummed, not entirely sure what that all meant. She knew UCLA was a college, sure, but she didn’t get why someone would get so excited about going there. Then Mary Margaret swiped to another picture and this one showed Emma’s younger brother wearing a blow and gold football uniform. “Is he on the team?”

“Just for the first couple of years,” Mary Margaret nodded. “Then he quit to focus more on his studies. He’d decided to become a teacher halfway through and needed to take extra classes to catch up. Football’s pretty intense there so he wasn’t able to keep up with both.”

“A teacher, huh?” Emma hadn’t missed the way Mary Margaret’s eyes had lit up at the mention. “Like mother like son.”

Ducking her head but grinning proudly, Mary Margaret chuckled, “Yeah, I don’t know what made him change his mind, but it was a happy surprise. For me at least. You wouldn’t believe how angry his grandfather became after Neal made the decision. Ah,” her brows raised and she quickly looked over at Emma, “I mean, your grandfather. Both of yours. Sorry.”

Not offended by the slip up in the slightest, Emma shrugged and asked, “Why’d he get mad?”

“He was originally going to study law,” Mary Margaret rolled her eyes and then swiped through a few more photos until she found one that included her, David, a toddler Neal, and a few other people Emma didn’t recognize. “Here’s your grandpa George,” she zoomed onto the face of a balding old man with perfect posture and a hard lined mouth. “He owns a law firm in L.A and wanted Neal to take it over for him one day. He had the same reaction when David dropped out of law school and entered the police academy.”

“Did he ever get over it?” Emma frowned at the picture. The man looked cold and mean, not unlike some of the faces she’d grown up with in the Underworld.

“It took a few weeks, but he eventually came around. George can be a bit crotchety at times but he’s a big softie when it comes to Neal since he’s—or, was—his only grandchild.”

“What about him?” Emma pointed to another man in the photo, one who had an identical face to David’s. “You didn’t tell me David was a twin.”

Mary Margaret’s lips thinned. “That’s James, your uncle.”

“No kids from him, then?”

“No, thank God. Oh!” Mary Margaret’s eyes went large and Emma laughed. “No, that was unkind. Ah, I just mean he never found the time, I guess. He’s a lawyer too, and—”

“And he’s a total jackass?” Emma guessed, a wide grin pulling at her lips. Before this Emma had thought the woman a saint with no bad words to say about anyone—demons excluded, of course.

Sighing in defeat, Mary Margaret nodded, “Utterly and completely.”

The image on Mary Margaret’s phone disappeared, revealing a name as a call interrupted them. “Oh, that’ll be my sub. I need to take this.” She gave Emma an apologetic smile.

“Go for it, I’m going to take a shower.”

The room the Jones brothers had given her was located on the second floor. It used to be a study for Liam, and before that a nursery, so it wasn’t very big, and it hadn’t been updated in at least twenty years, but it was comfortable and gave Emma a place to go for privacy. They’d made the decision to have her stay with the Charmed Ones to provide extra protection and the cut down on any travel time between the Manor and the Nolan’s house.

Opening her closet and pulling out a new, non-sweat covered shirt and pants. She’d have to grab a new towel from the linen closet in the hallway since she’d thrown her other one in the hamper this morning. Once all this was over, Emma had decided, she’d be over the moon to have her own bathroom again. She’d never truly appreciated the luxury a private bathroom was.

Another reason Emma was staying in the manor was because they’d decided to wait to tell Neal about her existence until after destroying the Source. Neal knew he had a sister, theoretically, but he didn’t know she was alive and in contact with his parents. They still weren’t sure how they’d break it to him. He had no idea that his mother was a witch since Mary Margaret had given up the practice ages ago. So that left them with two options, either fessing up about the whole things, or coming up with a new lie. Personally, Emma preferred the later option. Neal had been told his sister was kidnapped as a baby, all Emma had to do was say something like she’d tracked them down through some DNA testing site or something. David had been on board with that plan, but Mary Margaret was obviously uncomfortable about lying to her son. Omission was one thing, she had said, but outright lying was another.

“Hello dear.”

Emma’s heart stopped. Spinning around, she found the Seer lounging on the bed. Her blood red lips were pulled back into a devious smirk, reminding Emma of a snake that was eager for an easy meal.  

“Regina,” Emma growled. Fists curling, her hands began to glow. “What are you doing here?”

Not bothering to move an inch, Regina shrugged a diamond covered shoulder, “I wanted to check in on you. It’s been so long since we last spoke.” Quirking a brow, she asked, “By the way, how’s your mother?”

Raising her luminous hands, Emma took a step forward, ready to end the Seer’s life right here, right now.  

“Ah, ah, ah,” Regina held up a finger, her smile broadening. “If you vanquish me now, then you’ll never defeat the Source.”

Frowning, Emma paused but didn’t lower her hands. “What did you see?”

Casually, as if she wasn’t two seconds away from being smited into oblivion, Regina stood from the bed and walked around the room. Trailing her finger along the wooden dresser and sneering at the floral drapes. “Who decorated this place?”  

“Regina,” Emma snapped, finally putting her hands down and dispersing her magic. If the Seer had wanted her dead, she would have attacked by now. Or she would have had someone attack her by now. And since neither of those things had happened, that could only mean she wanted something from Emma. “What did you see?”

“Many things,” Regina hummed, now directing her gaze up to the crown moldings. “The future is not yet set you see, but the odds are not in your favor, dear.”

Emma knew she was being baited. Regina used to play this game all the time when Emma was a child. She’d tease out details of the future in order to have Emma beg for more information. Not this time, though, because this time Emma knew something Regina didn’t.

Crossing her arms over her chest, Emma said, “Screw the odds, you don’t know what you’re talking about. If you did then you’d have killed me after stealing me from my mother.”

Spinning around to stare straight at Emma, her dark red dress swishing loudly at the movement, Regina barked out a laugh, “You think so? Why? Because you’re the Savior?” Seeing Emma’s eyes widen, she laughed again, “I’ve always known what you are Emma. I’m the Seer,” her lips pulled back in disgust, “I knew what your destiny would be long before you were a thought in Mary Margaret’s pretty little head.”

Emma’s brows furrowed. If Regina’s known this whole time, then Rumpelstiltskin must know too. So what’s he playing at? If he knows who she is and that she’s destined to kill him, then why has he let her live for so long? Why did he make her so powerful? Why did he keep her at his side? Regina had to be up to something. Emma thought of Glass and his fate. Regina had gotten the demon killed without lifting a finger.  

“So many thoughts, so little time,” Regina tutted. “I never told Rumple. He just thinks you’re a Firestarter,” she shrugged, like an afterthought, “maybe a bit more powerful than most, but nothing more.”

“Why?” It didn’t make any sense. Regina was the Source’s right hand. She helped him gain power centuries ago, she told him everything. So why didn’t she tell him this? Why did she want Rumpelstiltskin dead, or was this a trap? “What are you up to?”

“Nothing you need to worry about, I assure you.” Stepping closer, Regina continued, “All you need to worry about is getting stronger, and you won’t be able to do that while working with that insufferable white-lighter or your pure-hearted mother.”

“Don’t you dare talk about Mary Margaret,” Emma said, her tone low and deathly serious. “I should kill you right here and now for what you did to us.”

“Probably, but you won’t.” Regina stepped even closer, looking straight into Emma’s eyes.  

Emma raised a brow, “You sure about that?”

Regina chuckled, “You need me to find Rumpelstiltskin’s dagger. Killing me will just ensure your own demise, and the demise of everyone you love. No,” she smiled, all teeth and no warmth, “you’re too smart to kill me now. I raised you better than that.”

Maybe what she said was right and Emma couldn’t kill her, that didn’t mean she had to put up with this. Hands flashing brightly, Emma pushed Regina hard. The Seer hissed as she fell backwards across the room. The fabric covering her shoulders were scorched and blackened and smokey tendrils turned into a hazy mist around Regina’s face. Through the fabric Emma could see Regina’s skin, shiny and red with blood, begin to heal.  

“You raised me to be a killer,” Emma straightened her book and looked down at the demon responsible for the piece of shit she’d called a life. “So don’t test me.”

Standing back up to her full height, Regina tried plastering on her usual grin but it was obviously strained. “Guess you’re not as smart as I thought.”

Lifting her chin, Emma replied, “Guess I’m not as afraid of you as you thought. Now get out.”

Regina blinked. “What?”

“Get out of this house,” Emma repeated. “I don’t need your help and I don’t need it. I’m not playing your games anymore, Regina.”

“So what?” Regina laughed, incredulous, “You’re letting me go?”

Emma nodded, “You get this one pass, but if I ever see you again I swear to god, Regina, I’ll burn you into oblivion.”

“Stupid child,” Regina hissed. “You’ll regret this.” Then, in a wave of white light, she vanished from Emma’s room.  

Knowing the Seer, she headed straight for the Underworld with the intention of telling the Source of her new “discovery” and that Emma was the Savior. Once Rumpelstiltskin knew of her true identity, he was sure to come after her himself, holding nothing back. She was ready for him though, she could feel it in the marrow of her bones. Regina was wrong. Every second of every day Emma grew more into her power and her strength, and it was only a matter of time now before her light eclipsed the Source’s darkness. Like a candle at the end of its life, Rumpelstiltskin’s reign of terror was about to be snuffed out. Let him come.

[sparklydreamies]

Stray Kids 8 Part Series ~ (3) Seo Changbin: He Laughed

Group: Stray Kids

Member: Seo Changbin

Genre: Light angst +hurt/comfort

Word Count: 4,000+

Summary: Don’t give power to merciless people behind a screen. 

Stray Kids 8 Part Series MASTERLIST

A/N: Hi guys!! Sorry it took me so long to post again, but I’m back, and hopefully I will be able to write more frequently! This story is centered around the changes in Changbin’s appearance and confidence from debut to now. I always feel bad writing members in pain, but this is the story I came up with lol,, I guess the moral of this story is that idols are people who have valid emotions and feelings, and we as fans don’t have the right to dismiss them and treat them like dolls. So on that note, thank you all for reading!!<33

All throughout his childhood, Seo Changbin had always been skinny. There was never much of a reason for his naturally slim stature other than genetics and a fast metabolism. It always seemed as though throughout his youth, he had never experienced the usual figure changes that a lot of his friends had gone through, whether it was the gain of muscle or fat. 

No matter how much food he ate, it never seemed to show on his body. There wasn’t a single part of his body that had excess fat covering the very visible bones. He could never grab a hold of any extra flesh on his body like some of his friends could.

As a teenager, he was always told that it was because he was a “growing boy”, and that he needed a lot of calories in order to grow big and strong. It wasn’t until he was in his early twenties that his stature began to change. He slowly became more muscular, thanks to his countless hours in the gym. Not only that, but he began to notice the faint gain of fat whenever he ate a lot without burning the calories. 

In a way, Changbin had always felt like he was blessed to be naturally slim. It was especially appreciated for someone in his line of work. Even after it became easier for him to gain fat, the company had never considered him “too heavy” for an idol. Muscle mass was a different story, however as time progressed, Changbin was able to build the perfect amount of muscle to satisfy the company as well as his fans. 

In short, Changbin had always liked his body. 

“Time’s up!” Doni called. “Put your markers down.”

Changbin didn’t put his marker down. Giggling like a small child, he avoided the attempts Jisung made at stealing the black marker from his hand, only stopping when the show host called him out on it. 

“Changbin’s naughty, he keeps cheating!” Coni laughed. 

This was what Changbin loved doing. Making a fool out of himself during variety shows, cheating during games with his members, and overall acting like a child whenever he could. 

“We should stop the show right here, Changbin ruined it for everyone.” Doni joked, and Changbin felt Jisung collapse on his back in a fit of laughter, nearly knocking them both off their stools and onto the ground. 

“Okay, let’s start with Felix! Show us your drawing,” Doni called, and Felix flipped the notebook he was holding in his hands around. 

The point of this segment was for the members to draw a portrait of how they perceive another member. 

The entire group as well as Doni, Coni, and a few of the staff members had burst out in laughter at the drawing Felix made of Jeongin. 

“Felix, you forgot eyebrows!” Jeongin whined from his spot. Changbin didn’t even notice the missing eyebrows; he was more focused on the teeth that were twice the size that they should have been. 

The segment continued on like that, and Changbin felt a swell of pride when the whole group laughed at his drawing of Minho, which looked so scrappy that a five year old could do better. Changbin was having fun.

It wasn’t until it was Jisung’s turn to share his drawing that his mood took a shift. 

“And this is my drawing of my lovely Changbinnie-hyung” Jisung giggled from his spot behind his muse. 

Changbin took in the piece of art before him. The hair was scraggly, the eyes were small, and the chin looked more like a “V” than a chin. 

Changbin laughed at the representation of himself. 

“Oh the chin! The chin!” Coni laughed as he made the shape of a “V” with his hands to mock the drawing. Changbin laughed. 

“That is the most accurate drawing so far!” Doni commented as he forcefully took Changbin’s face and traced the edges of his chin with his fingers. “Wow, Han is an artist!” Doni cracked as he high-fived Jisung. Changbin laughed. 

“He captured Changbin’s face so cleverly!” Coni praised, sitting back down on his stool. Changbin faked annoyance at the hosts and at his band mate. And then, he laughed once again. 

His brothers were practically howling at the scene, their voices creating a cacophony of sound ringing in Changbin’s ears. He was happy. He was laughing. So why did it feel as though his stomach was falling through the floor?

For the first time that day, Changbin had to forcefully plaster a smile on his face. He felt the bubbling feeling of embarrassment in his chest for the rest of the filming. 

A little while back, Han Jisung had been given a nickname by his fans. Less than a nickname, it was more of a cute comparison. His cheeks had always been unusually large and soft. Whenever he would eat, he would store food inside of them, making them more accentuated than they were before. It was because of this that fans had begun calling Jisung a squirrel. 

Jisung liked the connection. Contrary to how he presents himself, he had often struggled with accepting and liking his cheeks. He didn’t like the way they made him look younger and more boyish. He wanted to be perceived in a more mature and manly way. 

That was why when fans began to compliment and praise his chubby cheeks, it helped him become more confident in his face. 

Changbin had seen the improvement of Jisung’s spirit. Praise for Jisung’s cheeks from fans had helped him improve his self image a lot, and for that, Changbin’s love for his fans had only grown.

He only wished that he could experience the same reactions to his insecurities. 

Changbin wouldn’t consider himself jealous of Jisung’s full cheeks and round face. It was stupid to compare oneself to another person based off of superficial things like looks, however it didn’t stop Changbin from appreciating the younger boy’s unique features. 

The show aired on it’s planned date with no faults. Changbin watched the program on television, and was fairly proud of the results of the editing process. He had hoped that STAYs would enjoy the hour-long show.

After a few hours, Changbin opened Twitter so that he could get a sense of how his fans appreciated the show. Skimming through fans’ tweets, he noticed a few that stood out to him. 

Most of the comments were about Felix and Jisung’s aegyo, or Hyunjin’s random dance challenge. The deeper he scrolled, the more tweets he found about him. 

Normally, having a lot of tweets aimed at him would be an honour to Changbin. It usually meant that he was charismatic and funny enough to gain fans’ attention. That was why he didn’t understand the embarrassing feeling that came along with the jokes about his face structure. 

That’s all that they were. Jokes. People liked to joke about his chin, so why should he worry? Why did he feel shameful? 

Changbin’s stomach continued to drop with every comment he read about his face. Every time he saw that drawing of him, it was like another pin stabbing his chest. 

That night at dinner, everyone was talking about the show. The members were talking about the comments that they received, the fans reactions, and how they thought it was a really successful show. 

At one point during the meal, Jisung had shoved Changbin in the shoulder and laughed about the drawing that he made and how funny the fans thought it was. Changbin laughed. 

Changbin had always been able to hide his feelings well. Especially as an idol, hiding hardships is mandatory. Changbin was good at laughing. It was a sure fire way to make everybody think that you’re happy, when on the inside, it feels like you’ve swallowed a thousand bees. 

So that night, he laughed. He subjected himself to be the clown, even though it hurt him. Nobody needed to know about how he let his tears fall onto his pillow while they all slept. 

Changbin had thought about how he was working so hard to remain slim and skinny, and how if he were to gain just a little more weight, he could possibly make himself softer and cuter, like his brother Jisung. 

He figured that it was worth a try. Sure he might have to fight the company tooth and nail to gain the weight that he wants, but it was worth it. It was worth it to change how he looked. It was worth it to satisfy his fans. 

For the next few weeks, Changbin had let himself gain weight. He ate more and stopped trying so hard to burn it all off. He still worked out enough to remain healthy, and he was still trying to gain muscle, but whenever he stepped on the scale and saw that he was a pound or two heavier than he had previously been, he felt his heart swell. 

It was an odd thing to want to gain weight. Most idols would kill to be as skinny as Changbin had been, yet here Changbin was, trying to gain weight for the purpose of chubbier cheeks and softer edges. 

Eventually, it began to work. Changbin began to wake up in the morning to see that his face was rounder, fuller, and cuter than it had been before. The whole thing made him elated. 

It had gotten to the point where he was satisfied with his outer appearance. His chin was much less prominent. A less prominent chin meant that there was less for people to make their jokes out of. 

“Hannie, stop!” Chan shrieked just as Jisung smeared a fat glob of vanilla frosting on his cheek. 

All of the members were crowded in their living room, celebrating Bang Chan’s birthday with their fans. The energy level in the room was ecstatic. Some members were getting cake violently rubbed into their skin while others were trying to read comments and make the VLive as normal as possible. 

Changbin was in the middle of answering a question when he felt a tap on his shoulder from behind where he was sitting on the ground in front of the coffee table. Before he thought better of it, his head was turning and he was met with a face full of frosting from Minho. 

“Hey! Minho, get back here!” Changbin screamed, getting up to chase the nuisance around the room. 

Laughter filled the room and lit up Changbin’s heart. He thought that nothing could destroy his mood.

It wasn’t until the next day that Changbin had checked Twitter again. 

He scrolled through a lot of happy birthday wishes for Chan, which made him smile. He read a few of the messages, and saved the ones that he wanted to show to Chan. 

And then, he got to some posts about the live. Most of them were sweet and nice, there were some clips of various parts of the live including the moment that Changbin got his face full of cake. As he scrolled for longer and longer, he got to some comments that were less light-hearted. 

They didn’t like the weight he gained. Of course he noticed the comments from fans who had thought he looked healthier and happier, but no matter how many positive comments he saw, the posts from people calling him fat and saying that he was “letting himself go” were far stronger. The people calling him a pig and a fatass and ugly were too loud. 

Changbin didn’t understand. After everything he did to satisfy the fans, they still made negative comments about him. He once was too skinny, now he is too fat.

He knew that he shouldn’t listen to people who didn’t show their faces, yet to know that people were confidently calling him degrading names stung him deeply. He felt a hopeless feeling bloom inside of him, and it drove him mad. 

Changbin felt the first tear slip down the side of his face as the feeling of his chest collapsing took him over. His phone was thrown across his bedroom, the sound of a screen shattering as it hit the floor being the only identifiable noise in the room. 

He wanted to scream. There was no pleasing them. He hated himself. He hated the way that he looked. He hated himself when he was skinny, and he was beginning to hate himself now that he gained weight. But mostly, he hated the way that he was reacting.

This was the job, wasn’t it? None of this should be surprising to him. He had known about the malicious comments aimed at the other members for various reasons, so why was this so frustrating for him? 

Changbin fisted his hair to ground himself. He tried to count his breaths in his head, but all he heard was the comments ringing around in his ears. 

...He got fat...

...Has he stopped working out?...

Fucking breathe.

...He’s turning into a pig...

...Changbin’s face is so fat...

Letting out his first scream of frustration, Changbin shot up from his bed. If the fans wanted him to be skinnier, then fine. He would get skinnier. 

This was for the good of his career. Nobody liked an ugly idol, and if he is more attractive with a slim stature and a pointy chin, then he would work to achieve it. If he gained the weight, surely he could lose it again. 

The room was small, and it felt like it was getting smaller. 

Wiping the tears from his eyes, he threw open his bedroom door. Changbin grabbed his running shoes from the rack by the entrance, slipped them on, and took off from the dorm that felt like it was suffocating him. 

The night air was refreshing against Changbin’s burning skin as he sprinted down the street. Ten o’clock at night couldn’t be considered too late to go for a run, especially when the moon was shining so beautifully in the otherwise pitch-black sky. 

Changbin didn’t know where he was going, but he didn’t care. His lungs and legs were burning with the unexpected extortion. The sweatpants and t-shirt he was wearing didn’t make for good running clothes, but that didn’t matter to him. 

For a minute, he felt okay. He could even say that he felt good. For a minute, he had forgotten all about the fans and their vendetta against his happiness.

The wind had dried the tears off of his cheeks, and he just became another faceless person in the dark. Changbin didn’t think of himself as an idol, but rather a person who’s tight chest was slowly beginning to take in enough oxygen for his head to stop pounding. 

He didn’t know how long he ran for that night. His mind had cleared completely of thoughts, and he wore himself out. He didn’t even notice the warning signs of exhaustion before he was throwing up in a patch of shrubs. 

Slowly coming back to reality, Changbin realized he needed to get home. He wasn’t too far from the dorms, so once he gathered some strength back, he began walking. 

It was hard to tell how long it took him before he was trudging up the stairs and letting himself through the front door. He tried to be as quiet as possible.

The clock on the stove read 12:24. Changbin knew that if any of the members had realized he was gone, that he would be in a world of trouble. 

He took his running shoes off at the door and made his way to his and Felix’s room, expecting to see the younger boy playing video games or getting ready for bed. What he was not expecting was to see Felix sitting on Changbin’s own bed, frowning at the phone in his hands. 

Felix’s eyes darted up like a meerkat, relief flooding his features when Changbin entered the room.

“Where the fuck have you been!” Felix sighed, jumping up from the bed to pull the older boy into a hug, “I came out of the shower to see you were gone, you weren’t answering your damn phone, I was fucking worried you asshole!” 

Changbin repressed a smile as he pushed Felix away. “I’m fine, don’t worry.” 

Felix scanned Changbin, his eyes narrowing into suspicious slits. “Did you go for a run?” 

“Yeah,” Changbin answered.

“In... your sweats?” Felix fingered at the pockets of Changbin’s sweatpants, and the older boy swatted his fingers away. 

Changbin nodded and flopped down onto his bed. 

“Why didn’t you take your phone with you? I’ve been trying to call you,” Felix ran a hand through his hair, “Fucking hell,” he sighed. 

“I don’t know, Lixie.” As soon as Changbin’s head hit the pillows beneath him, he felt the exhaustion from his midnight run catch up to him. “You should watch your language, by the way.” he mumbled, cracking a small grin. 

“Changbin, seriously,” Felix climbed up beside him, “You’re fucking lucky! I was two seconds away from telling Chan, I swear to god.” 

Changbin looked up and saw the lines of genuine concern stretch across the boy’s face.

Felix had always been a caring person. He was always dependable, and he was really a true friend. It didn’t matter if Changbin was older, because he knew that Felix would always be there to protect him. 

Wordlessly, Changbin grabbed Felix by the arm and pulled him to lay down beside him. A fond smile graced his face. 

“Thank you for worrying,” Changbin whispered, “but I’m fine.”

Felix sighed. There was a beat of silence where Felix closed his eyes, and Changbin had started to think he fell asleep. But then, “Are you okay?” 

Changbin was stunned and confused for a second. “Yeah... why?” 

“You don’t usually go for runs. Especially not late at night.” Felix whispered. 

Changbin snaked an arm around Felix’s torso. “I was just having a bad day.” 

Felix was fidgeting slightly. It looked like he was fighting some sort of internal battle about whether or not he should say what he wanted to say. 

Changbin smiled at the nervousness. “What?” he encouraged. 

Felix’s gaze caught Changbin’s eyes. “Was it the comments? About your weight gain?” he asked in a small voice. 

Silence. There was no sound coming from anywhere in the dorm as Changbin processed the question. The smile that rested on his face immediately slipped away. 

“I... I saw them on Twitter, and they pissed me off, so...” Felix trailed off, lowering his gaze, “I mean you haven’t even gained that much...”

“I gained the weight on purpose,” Changbin said when he zoned back in on Felix.

“Oh...” Felix’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion, “Why? I mean, not that you don’t look good, but like... Why did you want to gain weight?” 

Changbin thought about why he wanted to gain weight. He thought about Jisung’s drawing, the “V” face comments, the constant embarrassment around his appearance, and his own insecurities. 

“It’s stupid.” Changbin dismissed, but of course, Felix kept digging. 

“It’s not stupid. It’s just me, you can tell me.” he eased. 

Changbin sighed. “You know... how people had been making jokes about my face? And my chin?” 

Felix nodded, confusion showing again. 

“I hated those comments.” he whispered. “I just got so insecure about my looks after people began to make those jokes, and I just... wanted to fix them.”

When Changbin looked at Felix, he saw that the confusion was still etched onto his features. “But...” Felix started, “you always laugh at those jokes.” 

Changbin felt like shit for unloading this onto Felix, yet he continued to explain. “I’m good at laughing.” 

The boys sat in silence for another minute. Felix seemed to be mulling over what he had been told, and Changbin watched the look of confusion melt into one of realization, and then sadness. 

“I’m so sorry,” Felix breathed, “I... I didn’t know you felt like that. I would have never made those jokes.”

Changbin felt his heart crack. Felix almost sounded heartbroken, and it killed Changbin inside. 

“But hyung...” Felix said, “you know that you don’t have to fix anything, right? You’re perfect. Don’t let them get to you.” 

Teardrops were threatening to fall from Changbin’s eyes for the second time that night, except instead of being born out of pain, these tears were brought on by the overwhelming feeling of being loved. 

“Okay...” was all Changbin could muster the strength to whisper. He didn’t trust his voice, so instead, he leaned forward and planted a soft kiss on his best friend’s forehead. 

“You know what, hyung?” 

Changbin hummed.

“I have dealt with so much hate because of so many things,” Felix sniffled away his own tears, “first they were upset because I wasn’t fluent in Korean, then they didn’t like my freckles, then it was my voice, and I thought that there was just no winning with them.” Felix closed his eyes. 

Changbin didn’t even think about that. If any member was no stranger to criticism from online fans, it would be Felix. 

The thought was crazy to Changbin. Why would anybody go out of their way to hurt somebody as sweet and perfect as Felix? The thought of somebody actually hating Felix for his mess of pretty freckles still amazed Changbin. 

“But you know what I realized?” Felix continued, snapping Changbin out of his own thoughts, “It’s not my job to please everyone.” 

“What do you mean, Lixie?” Changbin asked. 

Felix opened his eyes again, “Like... I’m doing music for me, right? If people don’t like the way that I look or who I am, then that’s their problem, not mine. Get it?” 

Changbin was amazed. 

“How are you so young and yet more wise than half of the industry?” Changbin saw the light in Felix’s eyes, and it made him smile, too.

“I mean it still hurts sometimes, but... less now.”

Changbin agreed. He couldn’t see how reading vicious comments like that could ever end up getting easier. 

“But now that I know you get comments and stuff that hurt you too, maybe we could... help each other. When it hurts a lot, you know?” 

“Like you mean... I come to you when it hurts, and you come to me?” Changbin asked. It made him feel special to know that Felix trusted him enough to want to go to him for comfort. It made him feel like he wasn’t the only one that got happiness out of their relationship. 

“Yeah, something like that,” he answered. 

Changbin’s smile returned full force. 

Felix was like sunshine, Changbin thought. This issue that seemed so horrible and painful to Changbin, now seems less than half as terrible since Felix was there for him. Since now, Felix was there to comfort him. 

He didn’t care if it made him weak or less of a man, because he didn’t feel like he had to be strong when he was with Felix. Felix had always been comfortable in his emotions, and Changbin admired that about him. 

“If you’re happy with the way that you look right now, you should keep it this way,” Felix encouraged him, “because for the record, I think you look better like this. You look happier.” 

“I am happier,” Changbin whispered. 

Shortly after that, the two boys fell asleep in Changbin’s bed, happy to have the support of their best friend. 

Although it was hard at first, Changbin slowly became more confident in himself and his appearance to not care about how other people wanted him to look. Even when he slipped up, Felix always caught him with a hug, a smile, and a shoulder for him to rest his head. 

For a while, Changbin had to fake his happiness during videos and variety shows. No matter how much he repressed it, the worry of how his fans would react to his appearance was always dangling in the back of his mind like an itch that he couldn’t scratch. 

But it got better. Changbin found himself worrying less and less about what his fans thought, and more about what he thought. Over time, he didn’t have to fake his happiness. The fans had even noticed how Changbin’s growing confidence affected him.

And perhaps best of all, eventually began to laugh again. It wasn’t a fake laugh, or a laugh to cover his shame. It was a real laugh that honestly held his real happiness. And unlike how he laughed before, this laugh was the product of his self confidence and strength. No laugh could ever be brighter or fuller than his. 

[drifttosleep]

[ My Jonas Brothers : Chasing Happiness Experience ]

introduction: if you know me, you know how much if a Jonas Brothers fan i am. yes, the first band i ever REALLY got into was The Beatles. but the Jonas Brothers was a boyband i really did fall in love with. we all had that one band from our childhood that switched everything up. mine were the Jonas Brothers. the way the directioners loved One Direction was my love for the Jonas Brothers. when i say “the boys,” i mean Nick, Kevin, and Joe. they’re my “the boys.” if that makes sense. 

history:  i remember the day i got into them. i was 10 years old and it was during the summertime. i had just finished watching ‘taking 5.’ a movie about the click five. the girls in the movie had posters and cut outs of the click five on their wall from posters and magazines. at that age, i was already collecting TigerBeat, Popstar!, J-14 magazines. i was too plugged in to the pop culture and the teeny bopper life. my dad was supportive. i was somewhat, inspired, when i watched that movie and checked out my magazines. i found the jonas brothers. i knew OF them and the song SOS and When You Look Me In The Eyes but nothing else. i had a personal computer in my room back then and newly plugged in internet connection. it started with music videos, and then the stupid videos they had on their yt channel, and i just couldn’t stop watching their videos. i watched all their live chats and interviews. i fell in love LIKE THAT. it was the first i ever obsessed about a boyband like this. a boyband in MY LEAGUE, you know what i mean? i obsessed over hannah montana and lizzie mcguire. but it wasn’t LIKE THIS. i grabbed my magazines and starting taping the Jonas posters on the walls. my routine was to watch all their videos everyday. i even went as far as reading fanfiction on youtube. YES. fanfiction USED to be on YOUTUBE. and that’s when crushes began. my bias was joe, at first, of course. then i slowly crept onto liking nick more. until he was my ACTUAL favorite. nick was my first love, i’m claiming it. the boy had me feeling ALL SORTS OF THINGS. the boy had me WRITING AT 11. 

influence: they were a huge influence on me. other than taylor swift and my dad getting me to pick up a guitar and learning how to play it, the Jonas Brothers wanted me to fulfill the dream. their influence on me was HUGE. it was so big that they were my first fashion icons. i broke gender stereotypes (at least in my circle) at the age of 11, you guys. i wore skinny jeans, converse, collared shirts and neckties all the time. they had me wearing denim and corduroy and my parents were so into me being into fashion at that age cause they were all about that in their youth. i mastered dressing like a guy at the age of 11. it just became a thing growing up. cause that’s where i’m most comfortable. i remember when the JONAS show came out on disney channel and the first episode was of nick having a love interest, i cried. 

other facts: 

i collected all kinds of jonas brothers paraphernelia as a child. 

other than the magazines, i had merch. i remember begging my mom to get me jonas brothers merch from their actual website. when she finally gave in, i was ecstatic. 

i had a jonas brothers t shirt and a necklace (it was a guitar pick with their logo on it) 

i also had a jonas brothers mp3 player that i bought when i was in tampa.

i’ve been to their first concert in the philippines. I REMEMBER HOW I TOLD MY PARENTS. i ran to them and said “THE JONAS BROTHERS ARE COMING HERE” and i didn’t even have to ask cause they already knew. 

my bedroom walls were FILLED with their posters. i had over 150 posters on my walls. 

i cut out their photos from magazines and covered my notebooks and pens with them. i sold a couple at school, too. 

you caNT BELIEVE HOW MUCH I FREAKED OUT WHEN I FOUND OUT ABOUT CAMP ROCK. when it came out in the states, my dad bought a copy of the dvd and i was SO SO SO EXCITED. that’s why i love home made spaghetti so much because it was the meal i was eating when i watched camp rock in my old bedroom for the first time. i squealed half the time. 

them being christian played such a big part in my life because my mom was a strict-ass hardcore christian. and since they wore purity rings, my mom got me a purity ring, too. at 11. which now, seems rather stupid. for me, at least. 

nick jonas & the administration is still one of my favorite albums. HE REALLY DO BE MAKIN ME FEEL SOME TYPE OF WAY. for real though. 

i really watched Married To Jonas, Kevin and Danielle’s reality show. it was NOT great but i watched it. 

i even watched some of nick’s movies and i didn’t like any of them really but i enJOYED NICK’S SCREEN TIME 

i did not really stray away from loving them. but i did turn into a teenager. i got into other things and gained a different circle of friends. it was different, okay? i couldn’t just be in love with a rock star anymore. HAHAHA. there were real life boys i kissed now. but still, i did not obsess over anything like that ever again. 

the break up:  i was in high school when they broke up. and even if i had not been keeping tabs on them and watching their every release, i cried really really fucking hard when they announced their break up. i cried so hard that i missed school that day. i was heart broken. and it might not make sense because they are brothers and they’ll really ~never~ break up, it still hurt. 

when i found out about Chasing Happiness, i was stoked. of course, i already knew they had returned back together as the Jonas Brothers. after all the experimenting with other things, they really did return to their roots. 

reaction about chasing happiness:

oh my GOD 

BABY JONAS BROTHERS :( 

FUCK. 6 MINUTES INTRO PLAYING

baby nick in les mis :( 

okAY SO IM NOT THE ONLY ONE WITH A BAD EXPERIENCE WITH THE CHRISTIAN COMMUNITY 

okay so the purity rings were a fucking joke i dont feel so guilty about it anymore

niley :( lowkey cried to niley at a young age but whatever 

fuCK EVERYONE WHO MADE FUN OF KEVIN. HE’S AMAZING 

please be mine :( 

crying

joe and nick making fun of kevin on the phone with danielle

joe calling danielle “kevin’s future wife” :( 

JUST FRIENDS :( 

THE NICK J SHOW 

camp rock :(

more crying really 

YEAR 3000 :( 

okay so basically, it was a ride of emotions. 

it really was though. i also felt like i time travelled. LITERALLY. it felt like i was in my old room again watching the Jonas Brothers on old YouTube. you know. before google bought the damn thing. but for real, it felt that way. it felt like i was reconnecting with my old self, too. the 10 year old me. 

no, wait. even better. it felt like i was reuniting with old friends. the scene when the 3 of them were just drinking and reminiscing and confessing about the old times was so intimate that i felt like i was there. everything they talked about (except for hating each other and how they ACTUALLY broke up), i knew about. they were my whole life back then, really. it really felt like a reunion. like them getting back together meant we were getting back together. the love for the Jonas Brothers. my fangirling over them. god, it sounds so cheesy when i say it out loud. but it really does feel like that. 

it was so familiar and so foreign to me at the same time. they talked about everything they used to never talk about back then. they just let it out in the open, really. and i saw how much they’ve grown. and i saw how much i’ve grown. how i am far from who i was at 10 years old. 

but when they sang ‘please be mine’ along with the old video of them singing it, i felt myself reconnecting with my younger self. i felt her smile at me and hold my hand telling me that the good will always resurface. and fuck yeah, i got that out of the Jonas Brothers. they’re the part of me that remains innocent. they’re a part of me that remains untouched and untampered with. because my heart was whole when i loved them first. and i think it’ll remain that way. 

it hit me harder than i thought it would. and i knew it would hit me. the documentary, i mean. it was beautiful. downright, beautiful. they’re a huge part of who i am today. and i am so so so proud of that. 

[itsyaboiwritersblock]

I Loved Her First

Paring(s): Nori x Female Hobbit Reader

Rating: T

Warnings: Pregnancy, Language

Words: 2,811

Genres: Angst, Fluff

I do not own the GIFs or characters

All dialogue in italics is in khuzdul

An uncharacteristically cheery smile was plastered on the dwarf’s face as he marched through the quiet Shire, taking in all the brightly decorated hobbit holes and lush gardens that stood in front of them. Usually a dwarf in this place wouldn’t seem so happy-go-lucky, but Nori was obviously an exception, as two of his friends happened to live in the Shire. 

Said two friends were Bilbo Baggins and his younger sister, {Y/N} Baggins. Normally, the Baggins family would never accept random company, especially that of dwarves. But ever since Bilbo had joined Thorin and his company on their journey to reclaim Erebor, their view on that had changed drastically, so much so, that they expected the company of dwarves quite often.

But none of the thirteen dwarves on that quest visited the Baggins’ residence as often as Nori had. Now, Nori wasn't necessarily the closest with Bilbo, no, the real reason Nori chose to visit as often as he did was because of {Y/N}. The younger, and only, sister of Bilbo had stolen his heart, even though he was the thief, not her.

Sadly, what he felt for his precious {Y/N} was not returned, as she was actually courting another young hobbit named Aldo. Aldo was a sweet young lad, he had to admit that, but he was still jealous of him, as he got to spend all him time with {Y/N}. He got to hold her and hear all the times she let out that angelic laugh she had. He wanted to say that it wasn’t fair, that he himself should be the one lucky enough to spend all that time with her and hold her. But he knew it really was fair. He was a common thief, not really a good one either, one that only decided to steal things that were completely unneeded.

Candlesticks? He had plenty of those, especially ones from Rivendell, of course, when Dori found out he never heard the end of it. Though as Nori snapped back into reality, he could only focus on the sound of what sounded like crying from the other side of the hobbit hole door. So, not even bothering to knock, he shoved the door open and stormed inside to reveal the shaking form of {Y/N} who was tucked under her brother’s arms.

Bilbo seemed to be muttering something Nori couldn’t exactly pick up on, which he was actually glad about since it seemed that he was barging in on a private moment. Of course, it didn’t last forever because the female hobbit noticed the dwarf standing in the entry of their dining room.

“Mister Nori, I apologize, I didn’t realize you were coming to visit. I apologize for my appearance, I’ll... I’ll go clean up. Excuse me.”

Before anyone could stop her, {Y/N} frantically stood up from her brother’s grasp and ran to the other side of their little hobbit home, leaving Bilbo looking quite exasperated and Nori was just plain confused.

“Sorry for her behavior, Nori, my sister has been... She’s been through quite a lot lately, and I think it’s only now taking a toll on her.”

Nori felt his heart break at the thought of his favorite hobbit going through so much in such a little time, he had wished he could’ve been there sooner, but then again, he probably would have made things worse for the girl.

“What did happen to put her in such a foul mood, Bilbo? Well, if you don’t have an issue with me asking.”

To this, Bilbo only sighed and fell back into his chair, dragging his hands down his face. Whatever was affecting {Y/N} seemed to be bothering Bilbo just as bad.

“Aldo called off the courtship between he and {Y/N}.”

Okay, this was sad news for {Y/N}, so why was Nori so ecstatic? Why was he so happy to find out that the woman he loved had her heart broken but was now single. 

“And why did he call it off? Everything appeared fine with the courtship from what you told me.”

“Everything was fine. The courtship was going smoothly, but that all changed when... When {Y/N} found out she was with child.”

Wait, what?

“She’s with Aldo’s child? And he called off the courtship?”

“I’m afraid so, she said his lame excuse was that he apparently was not ready to be a father. And does she look ready to be a mother? I most certainly think she does not.”

Bilbo huffed while pursing his lips, while Nori just stood there speechless, not yet processing all of the information he just heard. All he really understood was that {Y/N} was having a baby. Alone.

That just wouldn’t do in Nori’s eyes, she needed someone there with her. Well, she had Bilbo, but...

“Say, Nori... Can I ask a favor of you?”

Bilbo’s soft question dragged Nori out of his dazed state and forced him to look at the hobbit who was once again speaking to him.

“Well, that depends... What do you need of me?”

“I know you fancy my sister, do not try to deny it. I would not mind, actually, if you two started courting, but of course I fear it’s a little too soon for that.”

As Bilbo started to ramble on about how perfect of a couple Nori and his sister would be, Nori began to question where the favor part came in.

“That’s why I wanted to ask only ask you this. I request that you stay here, with my sister and I, until she has the child, to keep her happy and safe, of course.”

Did... Did he hear Bilbo correctly? Did he just ask him to live with him and his sister? Yes, yes he did. And he still had yet to reply and the silence was starting to get awkward.

“You sure you want me? You know I’m no more than a common thief, right?”

“Oh, yes I am fully aware, I am hoping you are capable of stealing my sister’s heart in the process.”

And with a wink, Bilbo sealed his lips as his sister had walked in, her {e/c} still rather puffy and red from all the crying she had done from before. The only thing that seemed to be different about her from before was the fact that she had plastered on a fake smile to try and fool Nori, as if he already didn’t know what had happened. 

“{Y/N}, I have offered Nori stay here until you have the child. I know you mentioned you did not feel safe, which I agree with.”

{Y/N} seemed to be just as surprised as Nori was when he was told the same information. Her mouth was agape as she stood there, wide eyed until her eyes once again filled with tears.

“Why would you do such a thing? Nori has better things to do other than watch over his friend’s moping sister!”

{Y/N} hiccupped, her face contorting and turning a bright red as she once again tumbled into a whirlwind of repeating emotions.  “{Y/N}… I promise that nothing would make me happier than to stay here and spend time with one of the best hobbits I know. Even if I only know two... Besides, it gives me an excuse to not face my older brother’s lectures for a couple of months.” 

And with Nori’s small excuse of a speech, {Y/N} could tell that her brother made the right choice in inviting the dwarf to stay with them, and that these next many months wouldn’t be too terrible.

At first, {Y/N} was having trouble adjusting to getting used to Nori living in their house. Really, she started to doubt her brother’s judgement and just wished the dwarf would go already. But after about roughly a month, {Y/N} was honestly glad her brother suggested this.

The second month went smooth and that was the month Nori sent his first letter back home to his brothers. He had received a letter back after about a week, it was from Ori, which was probably a good thing. In the letter he sent, Nori didn’t reveal why he had to stay with the two hobbits, instead he gave some random reason that didn’t reveal any information at all.

Months three and four passed by at an alarmingly quick rate, almost nothing going wrong, save for the occasional breakdown from {Y/N} that was usually caused by something silly. Her clothes got too small? Instant tears. Bilbo accidentally raising his voice? Again tears. The market didn’t have her favorite fruit? Nori couldn’t think about that moment and not feel bad for the stand owner.

By the fifth month, things got a bit rough, as she started to show more and that required her to buy bigger clothes, which {Y/N} absolutely hated. Nori could tell that she was growing self conscious with her changing body, so, he tried to cheer her up as much as he could. Though, he only attempted this once as this once attempt caused him to wind up with a black eye and a profusely crying and apologizing {Y/N} while Bilbo couldn’t seem to stop chuckling while he was tending to Nori’s swollen eye.

The sixth and seventh months were the hardest to deal with, in Nori’s eyes. It all started with an innocent trip to the market, where {Y/N} happened to see Aldo, who already had a pretty young hobbit on his arm, and she seemed pretty smitten with him. Nori tried to distract her from that “no good heart shattering arse,” as he put it, but it only seemed to make the situation worse.

{Y/N} had lashed out at him, claiming that she didn’t need him there to protect her, that Bilbo just took pity on the failing kleptomaniac and decided to invite him into his home. The dwarf in question knew that she was only saying this out of anger. Right? He tried to not let it get to him, because he really did know that she was just spouting insults at this point. But there was this pit inside his stomach that was telling him she was right, that everyone took pity on him because he really just was a failing thief that had to live off of his poor brothers. He didn’t talk to {Y/N} for the rest of the week after that, he claimed it was for her sake, that he didn’t want to accidentally trigger another meltdown. But Bilbo knew Nori’s pride was more than wounded and he would never admit it. When the two finally made up, life just decided to throw a wrench in their plans once more. Just as {Y/N} was starting to finally get over the Aldo incident, he had the nerve to show up on their doorstep. Of course, he couldn't greet his once partner like any normal person. No.

Aldo had showed up on a rather warm summer day, which had caused {Y/N} to dress in a rather bright and flowy dress, as she was actually feeling confident with herself, despite the ever growing bump that was her stomach. Well, she did feel confident, that was before she answered the door and saw him. Sadly, Nori and Bilbo were out that day, as Bilbo’s sister was able to convince them that she could be fine by herself for just one day and that they deserved to spend the day out and enjoying the weather rather than stay cooped up inside the house. Maybe she shouldn't have let them go out because it was starting to look like she needed someone to cry to right about then, and she certainly wasn't going to cry to Aldo. 

“{Y/N}! Good morning! Wow, you have gotten... Quite large.”

{Y/N} didn't let him say anymore, as she slammed the door in his face, her eyes already squinting and flooding with tears. And as soon as she was left alone, she pressed her back to the door and slid to the floor of her shared home, a hand drifting to her bump, tears now falling profusely down her face. It didn't take too long for her to actually end up taking a nap there, everything that had happened in the last months finally catching up with her.

But it was in the eighth month when it happened.

They showed up unannounced, which seemed like a common trait among the brothers. That day started off as normal as any day could, the three had a small breakfast together and eventually just ended up talking over a cup of tea. But their stories were interrupted by a soft knocking at the door. Nori nominated himself to go answer it, but answering it at all was a mistake, because behind that door happened to be his two brothers, Ori and Dori. Dori, of course, ended up immediately fussing over Nori and his lack of communication during the several months he had been gone. Nori, through nervous stuttering and backtracking, tried his best to explain what was going on, but sadly, she walked into the conversation before he could. And as soon as Dori saw {Y/N}, who was obviously very pregnant, nothing could save Nori from the rage of a mother hen.

“What the hell did you do to the poor girl, Nori!”

“Dori, I promise I can explain if you-”

“Explain? Explain what? The girl’s having your child, there’s nothing to explain about that!”

“But the child ain’t mine, Dori!

{Y/N}, do you want to explain to my stubborn brother what really happened?”

“Don’t drag her into this! You tell us you’re going on a trip to the Shire to get your unrequited feelings off your chest and she just so happens to end up having a child?”

And at that moment, Nori froze, as the secret he had kept for years has just been spilled by his overbearing brother.

“Nori... What does he mean unrequited feelings?”

{Y/N} piped up, her eyes wide due to the information she had just heard. Nori didn’t reply, instead, he turned on his heels and marched straight into the house, eyes cast down as he didn't really feel like talking to anyone, especially his mother hen of a brother.

“Dori, is there something I don't know about?”

She tried again, but Dori wouldn't say anything, instead, he just bowed his head in shame, not wanting to admit what he had done and face the relationship he had possibly just ruined.

{Y/N}, who was tired of not getting any information out of these useless dwarves, marched, well, waddled into her home, a hand cupping her stomach the whole way. Bilbo was still at the table, quietly sipping his tea, because at this point, what was going on wasn't his business, and he figured it would be best if he stayed out of it.

When {Y/N} reached the room Nori had been staying in, and where he was currently pouting in, what she saw broke her heart. Nori was packing all of his things into his bag, wait, that silverware wasn't his, though... 

“Nori...” She tried, softly, but this didn't generate any reaction from him, it maybe even made him worse, as he started to pack things away quicker than before. “Nori, I’m sorry I didn't realize before.”

“Realize what? That the thief everyone takes pity on calls you his One?” Hearing that... It made her even more confident that what she was about to do was the right decision.

“I’m sorry that I didn't realize that I feel the same. That I didn't realize that all this time I was wishing he could have a father, when the perfect one for him was in front of me the whole time.”

“How do you know it’s a boy?”

Nori seemed to cheer up at this, his eyes shining a little brighter as he turned around, gently wrapping an arm around the small hobbit’s waist and putting his other hand on her stomach. This action caused his hand to jump up in the slightest as the baby decided to lay a kick right in that spot.

“Because I’ve never seen a female hobbit this feisty and strong. Say, Nori... What do you think about staying here, in the shire, with me and little Nori, permanently?”

She asked, pressing her forehead into his chest with a soft sigh, already feeling the months of stress she had been carrying suddenly disappear. “I think it’s a great idea, if it means staying away from my bastard brothers longer.”

She lightly slapped him in the chest, which cause him to chuckle softly and plant a very gently kiss to the top of her head, giving his nose a wiggle as her curly hair had tickled it.

“I do hope you have a better reason for staying, Mister Thief.”

“Aye, lass, you just gave me the best reason to stay.”

[oishiitamashii]

Sandwiches Without Crust

its another request from my discord server!

this one is kiranobu so beware i guess

here it is on ao3 https://archiveofourown.org/works/20353507

Sundays were the worst day for Kira. No work, no school, and everyone was around for a full 24 hours. While he felt like he had settled into the place of Kosaku Kawajiri well enough, he knew that there were… Suspicions. And having a full day just for your fake son to analyze you didn’t exactly help. He sighed, pulling the book he had closer into his lap. The topic didn’t really interest him. He really did have nothing in common with the old Kosaku, but that wasn’t important at this point. To continue his peaceful life in Morioh, sacrifices need to be made.

Kira heard a small knock on the door, and sighed, marking his page. 

“Come in.” His response was more curt than he meant, but he couldn’t help it. It was hard to fade into another person’s personality, especially with the… Urges he felt. His nails always seemed destined to grow into claws, like that of a transformation from man to beast. In a sense, maybe that was what was going on after all.

The door opened, and Kira sighed to find it was simply Shinobu. Technically now his wife, he found his relationship with her… Odd. While in the beginning she was cold, now Shinobu seemed to cling to Kira like a troublesome burr. However, Kira seemed to relax in her presence. Shinobu suspected nothing and trusted Kira with anything, a relationship not seen with her true husband. The idea actually made Kira a bit smug, boosting his ego by tenfold. He had practically saved this family from falling apart, and now, he would be able to reap the rewards, those being peace. Tranquility. Happiness.

“Dear, it’s nearly lunchtime. You really ought to come downstairs.” Shinobu’s voice was bright, excited. She truly did love Kira, even if she thought it was her husband. Poor Kosaku, already dead in an unmarked grave. No one would ever know.

Kira sighed, standing up.

“You’re right. Has Hayato come out of his room yet?” He asked, thinking about his sort of son. He was technically taking the role of his father now, and yet, both Hayato and Kira weren’t exactly happy with that. Apparently Kosaku never really was the best of parents either, and the situation of them leaving each other alone suited them both just fine. 

“He ran down to grab some breakfast, and then cooped himself back inside his room. I’ll never understand that child.” Shinobu sighed, already clinging to Kira was he got up, making his way down the stairs. Kira ended up making a small ‘hm’ sound. He was torn. On one hand, Shinobu would be ecstatic at the idea of having Hayato come downstairs. On the other hand, Kira honestly didn’t want to deal with an eleven year old right now. He was much more content just dealing with the woman who wouldn’t question a thing he said. So, he didn’t offer to go get him, instead going to the cabinet to grab some bread to make a sandwich. He’s a simple man of simple pleasures. Shinobu just gasped.

“Oh, don’t worry honey, you just sit down, I can make it for you!” She beamed, and Kira raised an eyebrow. “Are you sure? I can do it, it’s no trouble.” He offered, but Shinobu just waved him away, already getting things together.

“Don’t worry, I’ll make one for everyone. Can you go get Hayato for me?” She asked, and Kira grit his teeth. God, exactly what he didn’t want. Still, he just nodded, making his way up the stairs, and leaving Shinobu alone to have her little blushy self conference about how well that whole interaction went. 

Kira just knocked on the door, poking his head in slowly. He realized he had barely been in the boy’s room, and was sort of shocked at how… Normal it was. He thought Hayato might have action figures, or something, but honestly, it just seemed rather empty. Hayato just looked over at Kira with a bit of a sneer and an eyeroll.

“What do you want?” He didn’t like his father very much. That is, he didn’t very much like what Kosaku Kawajiri was now. It was like going into a room with everything moved two inches to the left, he just felt off. But he still couldn’t put a finger on it. Kira put on airs, giving both of them what they wanted from each other, and that was to not deal with each other. Still, this had to happen one way or another. “Your mother is making lunch. She wants you to come downstairs. It’ll be ready soon.” He told Hayato, and then left, not even waiting for a response. If Hayato didn’t come, then that was on him, no longer Kira’s problem.

Kira ended up back downstairs, sitting at the dining room table and once again offering his help, only to be rejected. So, he sat and watched her, watched how Shinobu’s hands moved as she worked, and he only swallowed, feeling his nails grow. Maybe watching her work was a bad idea. Shinobu was definitely the type of woman that Kira would have picked were he his old self, and living with her on the daily did not help his… Urges at all. 

Kira didn’t even realize that Shinobu had finished until he heard the chair next to him move. Kira looked over, then down to see, hey, a nice ham and cheese sandwich. Kira could appreciate the art of it. Then he noticed something.

“.. You caught off the crust.” He commented, and Shinobu squeaked a bit.

“Yes, I did. Is that a problem?” She was already nervous. Did she do something wrong? But thankfully, Kira just smiled.

“No, it’s cute. I like it.” He started eating, and Shinobu relaxed, giving a smile and beginning to eat too. Kira didn’t realize how hungry he was, eating rather quickly and standing up to put his plate away. He sat back down, and Shinobu just giggled.

“Was it good?” She asked. Kira looked over at those doe eyes she was giving him, and swallowed a bit. This was getting back very quickly.

“Yes, dear, it was wonderful. Thank you.” He replied, and Shinobu smiled, placing her hand on top of his. Kira felt a definite shudder go down his spine. 

“You know, I’m really glad we get to spend this time together nowadays. It’s nice.” She told him, and Kira’s mind was running wild. He could do it, right now. Force her against the wall, oh how wonderful she would look covered in blood, her screams would sound so delicious, he could hardly wait-

“Your face is turning red, Kosaku.” Shinobu said, leaning forward. Kira just swallowed, trying to hold himself back. He knew that if he lost control, he would do something, and he was just as clueless as everyone else as it what that thing would be. Shinobu placed the back of her hand on the side of his face, feeling him.

“Darling, you’re burning up. Maybe you ought-” She started to pull her hand away, but Kira grabbed it, keeping it right there against him. Shinobu gasped, leaning in closer. Their lips were only inches apart. Shinobu could feel her own blush start to grow, perhaps realizing what was going on, if not entirely. It was so long since she had received affection from her husband, that she couldn’t help but try to lean in. Kira felt himself leaning in too, feeling her warm breath against his own, his fingers curling around her own, and-

“What are you two doing?” The pair turned over, just to see Hayato, standing there, clearing not impressed. They both quickly moved away from each other, Shinobu tried to find some excuse, while Kira just remained silent.

“Oh, Hayato, you came for lunch! Your father and I were just, well his face was very hot, s-so I wanted to check to make sure he was right! Isn’t that right dear?” She laughed nervously, Hayato only rolling his eyes and sitting down to eat.

“Yeah, sure it was.” Kira felt Hayato’s eyes staring down at him, trying to pore into his soul. He was obviously unhappy with the situation, seeing him so intimate with his own mother. Hayato knew that there was something off with his father, and Kira knew Hayato knew something was off. So, he just sighed, letting the pair eat, letting the conversation become Shinobu talking about this and that, about how the neighbors got a new cat and how they’re planning on fixing the stoplight on the other side of town. 

After they were both done eating, Kira saw Hayato get up, moving to leave the room, and he sighed, only to find himself foiled again.

“Well, I’m going to watch some TV. Kosaku, would you like to join me?” Kira opened his mouth to speak, only to hear Hayato call back out.

“I’ll watch with you mom!” He smiled, and Shinobu was taken aback, but still delighted.

“Alright then, come on.” Shinobu walked out of the room, and Hayato followed, but not before giving Kira a bit of a glare. The intent was clear. Don’t touch my mom. But, Kira still followed, intent on being there with his wife and son. Shinobu sat on the end of the couch, and Hayato easily cuddled up next to her. Kira sighed, taking an armchair and reading a book while the pair watched TV. It was something about a local beach, he honestly wasn’t paying much attention. “Kosaku, when it gets warmer, we should all go to the beach together. What do you think?” Shinobu called out, and Kira looked up, giving a nod and smiling.

“That sounds wonderful. We’ll have to find a day to do it.” He replied, and she just smiled. Success.

Time moves faster than one could expect, a show changing from the next, to the next, to the next, until Kira felt Shinobu tugging on his sleeve. He looked over, and her voice was a loud whisper, apparently giddy.

“Look, Hayato fell asleep.” She told him, and Kira looked over to see the young boy cuddled up against his mother. He seemed so much younger when he was asleep, sweeter and kinder. Kira felt himself melt slightly at the sight.

“What should I do? I have to start on dinner, but I don’t want to wake him.” She asked, and Kira just sighed. He knew what he would have to do. 

“I’ll go put him in bed. We can wake him up when dinner’s ready.” He said, slowly and carefully picking up the boy in his arms. Shinobu felt her eyes start to water.

“You haven’t held him like that in forever.” She said, and Kira looked down at Hayato. He swallowed, trying to come up with an answer.

“Yes, well, he’s gotten big. He doesn’t like to be held the way he used to.” He said, and Shinobu just sighed.

“I know, it’s just… Been so long since we were a family. It… It makes me really happy to see you two together and getting along.” Shinobu said, getting up and giving Kira a chaste kiss on the cheek before moving to the kitchen to start on dinner. Kira felt his face head up again, and pulled Hayato close to his chest, slowly bringing him up the stairs as not to wake him. Once he made it to the young boy’s room, he found himself carefully tucking Hayato in, wanting to make sure didn’t wake up from the cold. He looked at the boy, sighing a bit and brushing a bit of his hair out of his face.

“... Dad…” Kira looked at Hayato, worried he may have woken him, only to find Hayato mumbling in his sleep. Still, Kira felt a bit of… Pride in hearing that. Like it was meant for him to hear, like Hayato was calling him his father. He sighed, leaving a small kiss on Hayato’s forehead and closing the blinds for him, standing up and moving to leave the room. Right before he left, he felt the urge to tell him one more thing. Just one more, and then Kira would be satisfied, able to go back to reading or whatever mundane task Shinobu asked him to do.

“Good night, Hayato. Sleep well.”

[ko-chan-the-blueberry-donut]

Mericcup Month 2018: What’s New (Old Friends II)

Prompt 5! Continuation of Old Friends! Please read Old Friends oneshot before this one.

@witch19

Sváss - beloved

Disclaimer: I don’t own brave or httyd

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What’s New (Old Friends II)

Merida couldn’t keep the flush from spreading across her face at the intimate way Hiccup addressed her. She didn’t know Norse, but remembering her dream, his younger self addressed her with the endearment just as affectionately as he was now. Elinor coughed, attempting to get over her own shock at Hiccup’s arrival. He was a lot different than the scrawny boy who would follow her daughter another as she created mischief.

However, despite his new look, she could still see traces of the young boy in this grown-up Hiccup for the look of adoration as he looked at Merida was the same as it was when he was a boy.

“Well, Hiccup… we haven’t really sent ye an invitation…” Elinor began, trying to stop the impending riot among the lords of this new challenger that was obviously leagues ahead of their sons.

“I understand I wasn’t officially invited, Your Majesty.” Hiccup told her politely. “But I made a promise years ago and I intend to keep it, with or without your permission.” The determination in his tone made Elinor see how he was able to be a chief at such a young age. His tribe stood straight, presenting they stood in unity with their chief.

Promise…? Wait! Is he talking about— Merida’s blush returned tenfold, remembering her dream of a little Viking boy promising her he’d marry her when they were old enough. As if Hiccup could sense her thoughts, he glanced at her with a teasing smirk. Merida huffed, crossing her arms—she wouldn’t let this Viking fluster her no matter how charming he was! Her attitude seemed to make him amused as he tried to contain laughter, mirth glinting in his eyes as he gazed upon her.

“Don’t be daft, Elinor! Let the boy compete! What’s wrong with some healthy competition?” Fergus chimed in, bouncing in his seat. Truth be told, he remembered the young Hiccup and how he treated Merida so kindly and tenderly that it swayed Fergus to root for the lad. He could see Hiccup was sincere in his affections for Merida even after all this time, and he was definitely more competent than the lords’ sons. If Hiccup made his daughter happy, he would welcome the Viking on the throne.

“King Fergus, with all due respect, he is a Viking—”

“Who was childhood best friends with my daughter when they were young. He has a right just like yer sons to try for Merida’s hand.” Fergus interrupted the lords, pleased he accomplished something. Elinor sighed, knowing what side her husband was on, and gazed upon Hiccup, seeing his earnest determination to try to win her daughter’s hand, and she saw how Merida was reacting to Hiccup and how Hiccup was acting with her.

She couldn’t take away Merida’s chance at happiness…

“Very well, Hiccup, ye are allowed to compete for the Princess’s hand.” Elinor conceded.

“To ask her you mean.” Hiccup corrected. Elinor, Merida, and everyone else besides the Vikings blinked.

“Pardon?” Elinor asked, confused. Hiccup smiled.

“If I win, I intend to ask for her hand in marriage, Your Majesty.” Hiccup explained. “If I win and ask her and she says yes, I’ll make her the happiest woman in the world, but if she says no, I will continue to support her and swear fealty to her when she becomes queen. I refuse to force Merida into an unhappy marriage.” The chief vowed, his tone leaving no room for argument. The other clansmen gawked at him.

“I thought we were competing for her hand. She can tell us no?” Young Macintosh whispered to his father. Lord Macintosh shook himself out of his stupor and snapped his head to his son.

“When you win, the princess will be your wife. The Viking chief is just insane.” He replied to his son and heir. Young MacGuffin looked intrigued by Hiccup’s idea.

“I would also like to give her a choice, if that’s all right with ye Da.” Young MacGuffin proclaimed to his father in a low tone. Lord MacGuffin gave him a look of shock before grumbling.

“If that is what ye want, son…” he acquiesced to his heir. Young MacGuffin beamed at his father’s agreement.

Meanwhile, Merida wasn’t registering anything besides the Viking chief. He was going through all this hassle just to ask her to marry him? The fact that he was pushing for her to have her own choice was mind blowing. A giddy feeling began to bubble in her stomach and she couldn’t keep the ecstatic grin off of her face. Hiccup returned her smile and Merida realized that he was sincere in letting her decide should he win. An urge to embrace him seized her while she bit her lip to keep from crying out in happiness. This Viking chief—this young boy from her past—was giving the freedom she’s always wanted in her life: the opportunity to choose her fate.

Elinor bit her cheek to keep herself smiling, joyful that Hiccup cared so much for her daughter. She would quietly root for the boy for sure during the games.

“Very well, Hiccup, if that is what ye wish.” Elinor replied, and the gathering was adjourned, allowing each clansman to retreat to their clan’s settlement outside the castle. Valka caught Elinor’s eye and winked, knowing Elinor was secretly cheering for her son. Elinor playfully scowled at her, discreetly gesturing them to retreat to Elinor’s study. Valka followed, making sure no one else saw her. The two women locked themselves in the study, taking seats at the table and pouring water for the both of them, Elinor crossing her arms with a look of disapproval, but her eyes shining in mirth betrayed her.

“Ye know I told ye years ago she would marry a Celt.” Elinor reminded her. Valka shrugged.

“You did, but I also know you have a soft spot for Merida’s happiness and knew my charming son would convince you otherwise to let him compete.” Valka replied smoothly, playfully smirking.

“Ye sound so confident that Hiccup will win.” Elinor quipped back, and Valka laughed.

“Oh, come now, Elinor! You saw those other boys! Hiccup will wipe the floor with them no problem.” Valka proclaimed having complete faith in her son’s skill. “No, the games aren’t the real challenge and you know it.”

“What’s Hiccup’s real challenge then?” Elinor played along, rolling her eyes.

“Having Merida fall for him, so she’ll say yes to marrying him.” Valka grinned.

“I was surprised he is giving her an option. When they were young, he was very adamant in his intentions for when they were older.” Elinor mused. Valka had a fond smile on her face.

“Yes, but children grow older and mature as does their affections. He loves her enough to let her be happy even if it’s without him—doesn’t mean he has to like it, but he’ll support it nonetheless because to him, Merida’s happiness is the most important thing.” Valka took a sip of her water.

“I hope ye understand I can’t pick favorites.” Elinor reminded her sternly. Valka looked innocent, but the knowing smirk on her face gave away this façade.

“In public yes, but not behind closed doors.” Valka told her, eyes glinting in mischief. Elinor felt the stern expression crack and a relieved smile came upon her face.

“To be honest, I’m glad ye showed up. Merida looked as if she was being sentenced to be executed.” Elinor winced at thinking about how Merida appeared as if she wanted to die as she sat in her chair while each heir presented themselves before Hiccup showed up. Valka patted her shoulder sympathetically.

“You’re trying your best. At least Merida has had you for her whole life. I left my son and he was shunned in his tribe until he changed their perspective when he first trained Toothless.” Valka said, guilt at her own abandonment of her child clenching her gut.

“Which reminds me, how did ye learn how to tame dragons? I thought yer village was for killing them.” Elinor asked. Valka smiled.

“Be prepared to be amazed at the story of how Hiccup became the Dragon Conqueror…”

------------------------

Merida tore off her wimple and dress, glad to be rid of the constricting fabric. She quickly placed on her dark blue casual dress, shaking her hair free of the wimple to get it back to its usual volume. She groaned, falling back towards her bed, staring up at the canopy.

“What a day!” Merida exhaled, massaging her temples. “What I wouldn’t give to go for a ride on Angus right now…”

“Would a ride on Toothless help?” a male voice asked.

Merida yelped, springing up and saw Hiccup hanging outside her window. She raced over and was surprised to see him casually riding Toothless who was hovering under her window. Hiccup winced.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you. You just seemed really frustrated before I showed up…” Hiccup ran a hand through his hair. Merida found the gesture cute.

“Shouldn’t ye be with yer tribe? Why come see me?” Merida asked, peering out the window to see if anyone spotted the dragon and his rider at her window, but no one was around. Hiccup looked shy.

“Well… it’s been years since we’ve seen each other. I’ve missed you…” he admitted shyly. Merida felt a pang of guilt in her chest. He clearly remembered her and all she could remember of him was a promise he made when they were young.

“I’m sorry, Hiccup, but I don’t really remember ye….” Merida confessed sadly. Hurt flashed onto Hiccup’s face before he masked it. His expression turned optimistic.

“The invitation for a ride still stands.” He told her, trying to not let his sadness show. Merida was tempted to go with him—to know more about this man, but she knew if she did, she’d be playing favorites. He seemed to notice her expression for he smirked, and Merida’s breath hitched. “Don’t tell me you finally started to follow the rules, Merida.” He teased.

His comment pushed her to grasp his hand firmly, her own smirk emerging on her face.

“If ye really knew me, ye’d know that’d never happen.” Merida remarked, and Hiccup pulled her onto Toothless, securing her in the second harness. Merida’s arms circled around him snugly and he had to fight the rush of happiness he felt at her touch.

“I always count on it.” Hiccup smirked, and placed his helmet on, finally taking off into the air.

Merida eyes took in the scenery on Hiccup’s dragon, her eyes wide with wonder the higher they flew. She gripped Hiccup tight, but not enough to constrict his breathing. They soared through the clouds and Merida reached a hand up to feel the mist between her fingertips. Laughter began to bubble in Merida’s throat and soon she was whooping in delight as they did twists and turns in the air.

“This is amazing!” Merida shouted, laughing in delight.

“You’ve seen nothing yet!” Hiccup told her. He leaned forward towards Toothless’s ear. “Let’s show her some real moves, bud!”

Toothless purred in agreement and they were off, flying even fast than before. Merida grinned as Hiccup and Toothless did flips and more elaborate tricks. Merida laughed boisterously, her hair whipping around her as she clutched securely onto Hiccup. She leaned her head forward, resting her forehead against his back, a gesture too intimate for strangers, but Merida found herself not caring as he flew her around.

Hiccup eventually lowered Toothless to on top of the Firefalls. Toothless sighed in happiness as he rolled around in the tall grass. Merida giggled at the dragon, finding him completely adorable. Hiccup watched her with a fond smile, and Merida felt herself trail off, a blush glowing on her cheeks. Hiccup could see he was making her flustered so he looked away and walked towards the edge of the falls, curious of how high they were. Merida watched him in interest, wondering what he was thinking. She walked over to him tentatively.

“I remember when we were little, and we said we’d climb the Firefalls and live at the top.” Hiccup finally spoke, chuckling at the memory, but soon a depressed expression came upon his face.

“Hiccup?” Merida called, reaching a hand to touch his arm, but felt she didn’t really have the right, and retracted her hand. Hiccup turned to her then.

“Do you really not remember me…?” he asked softly. Merida felt horrible. She wished she could remember everything about Hiccup in this moment. The words caught in her throat.

“I… I remember the promise ye gave me.” Merida averted her eyes, flushing, embarrassed to mention his declaration of wanting to marry her. Hiccup let out a laugh.

“Well at least that one stuck or else saying that at your gathering today would’ve confused you and probably freaked you out.” Hiccup said with relief. Merida smiled at him.

“At first, I thought I created a fantasy to save me from my arranged marriage, but then when ye came… it was like gaining a part of me back that I’ve lost years ago and didn’t know why…” Merida told him. She stepped forward and tentatively brushed her fingers with his. Hiccup didn’t make a move to hold her hand, letting her call the shots. He did however, brush his fingers back to let her know he didn’t mind her touch. Merida felt a rush of heat in her body at his touch but didn’t let it show.

“I’m glad.” Hiccup responded, staring down at her fondly. Merida felt her heart do summersaults.

“Tell me about our childhood, Hiccup.” Merida pleaded, taking a hold of his hand and bringing it close to her heart. “I want to know everything about our childhood together, and what has happened to ye while we were apart. I want to remember everything…” Merida beseeched him as she gazed into his eyes. More than anything Merida wanted to remember this boy. When she stared at him like that, Hiccup knew he couldn’t deny her anything, and clutched her hand, gently leading her back to where Toothless lay. They each sat down in the grass, not letting go of each other’s hand.

“Well, you heard how our parents met, but a few years after that, you and I were both born. So, naturally my dad and mom brought me to DunBroch when summer would come when were we both babies.” Hiccup began, lazily stroking her hand with his thumb. His touch sent sparks under her skin.

“So we were always friends?” Merida leaned forward eagerly, enraptured in the story already. Hiccup laughed.

“No way! My Mom put me in your crib and you tried shoving me out. It wasn’t until you we were two that you had bad nightmares and I climbed into your bed to calm you that we became friends.” Hiccup replied.

“Ye remember that far back?” Merida asked amazed. Hiccup shook his head, smiling.

“No, but that is what my Mom would tell me when I asked how we became friends. I just remember you dragging me around all the time after that and being joined at the hip with you.” Hiccup laughed. Merida found herself grinning with him.

“What was yer first memory of us?” Merida urged, excited to hear more. Hiccup smiled affectionately at her while caressing her hand. Merida tried to quell the butterflies in her stomach, but it was fruitless.

“I remember when we were four and you and I stole a shield from the armory to sled down the hills to the shore of the loch because I told you about sledding in Berk in wintertime and you wanted to try it.” Hiccup said. He then winced, “though we didn’t account for rocks and you and I ended up getting flung into the loch instead…”

“Oh, my Ma must’ve been mad that we were all dirty!” Merida laughed. Hiccup grinned boyishly.

“She definitely wasn’t happy we ruined your new dress. We got dessert taken away for a week as punishment. You didn’t like that, so you figured out how to sneak us into the kitchen every night after our parents went to sleep to steal some apple cake.” Hiccup added, eyes twinkling in amusement.

“That definitely sounds like me!” Merida laughed, not realizing she started caressing his hand, so at ease with this young man. “My Da says I was a hellion when I was young!”

“I doubt that has changed.” Hiccup teased, and Merida shoved him with her free hand. Hiccup looked positively ecstatic at how she was acting. It was like they were picking up right where they left off from the last time they saw each other.

“Shut it, you ninny! I bet ye haven’t changed much from being a scrawny toothpick!” Merida shouted at him, grinning. They both froze, realizing what she said. Merida stared into Hiccup’s eyes and sure enough, images of his younger self seemed to emerge inside her mind. “I… remember a bit! I remember ye always needing me to beat up bullies cause ye were so tiny!” Merida exclaimed in happiness. Hiccup grimaced.

“I was hoping those were one of the things you didn’t remember…” Hiccup groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose. Merida giggled.

“Ye were so tiny, I was afraid ye’d break one day.” Merida continued as more memories began flooding her mind.

“That didn’t stop you from handling me roughly.” Hiccup rolled his eyes, but you could see the grin on his face at the memories they had.

“I guess I was always dragging ye off on another adventure.” Merida said, vaguely recalling a young Hiccup being pulled by his arm as she yanked him along to cause mischief.

“Your mom was hoping I would be a good influence on you, but it backfired badly. You ended up being a bad influence on me.” Hiccup chuckled. Merida joined in his laughter.

“Why did it stop? Those summer visits I mean…” Merida asked, not getting why her and Hiccup lost touch. Hiccup appeared gloomy.

“When my mom went missing during a dragon raid, and dragon attacks were becoming more frequent, my dad couldn’t afford to leave the village for so long unprotected.” Hiccup explained sadly. “Leaving you for the final time was the worst day of my life…” he whispered, moving a stray curl of hers out of the way of her face, gazing into her eyes.

Merida imagined a young Hiccup watching her grow farther and farther away as he sailed back to Berk. She wondered what was going through his mind when he watched her waving goodbye to him. She felt the urge to embrace him tightly to rid of his sadness, but held it in. However, she unconsciously moved closer to him, wanting to be nearer.

“Then… when did ye say… ye know…” Merida muttered, averting her eyes and letting her hair shield her face. Hiccup pretended to look confused.

“What do you mean, sváss?” he asked, having the urge to tease her so he played dumb. Merida peaked up at him through her voluminous hair, glaring.

“Yer really going to make me say it?” she hissed, embarrassed. Hiccup could see the glow of her blush even through peaks of her hair.

“Say what?” Hiccup gave her a placating smile. Merida shot her head up, her entire face red with embarrassment, and glared at him, her eyes sparking like a fire.

“That ye’d marry me, ye ninny!”  she snapped at him, and Hiccup couldn’t contain his laughter, doubling over as Merida glared harder.

“You’re so adorable! You are embarrassed by me wanting to marry you!” Hiccup continue to laugh. Merida shoved him, pouncing on him to hit his chest. Hiccup laid on his back in the grass, shocked that Merida would fling herself on him. Merida seemed to have realized she was straddling him and ceased her assault, staring down at him with wide eyes, her mouth going dry.

It was as if he was under a spell, and Hiccup reached up to cup her cheek, caressing it with his thumb. Merida nuzzled into his hand, reaching down to cup his face, her fingers trailing his chest up to his cheek. He swallowed, mindful of the position they were in. They weren’t children anymore. A position like this was meant for two people who were more intimate than friends…

Their heartbeats were pounding quickly against both of their ribcages. Merida leaned down, and for a second Hiccup thought she was going to kiss him, but instead she touched his forehead with hers, sighing contently. Hiccup couldn’t help but shudder in bliss. He had always dreamed of being this close to Merida when he would see her again, but his dreams couldn’t compare to the actual experience. Her fiery curls were a curtain around them and he breathed in her familiar scent of wildflowers.

“We were six years old…” he whispered. Merida didn’t move, but he could tell she was listening intently. “We were cloud-watching, talking about exploring the world. It was my last summer with you after Mom disappeared, and I doubted I’d ever see you again. You just laughed and said you knew I would always come back to you and you would prove it by waiting forever if you had to.” He stared up at her with such earnest affection that it made her breathless. “I knew then I never wanted to leave you ever again, and I would do whatever it took to spend the rest of my life with you.” He confessed softly, stroking her cheek, his heart ramming against his ribcage.

Merida stared into his emerald eyes shining in adoration only for her. She was mesmerized by his words and the way he gazed at her. Everything about him seemed to pull her in and she found herself not minding at all.

“And if I say no?” she whispered, afraid to shatter the moment. Hiccup just smiled at her tenderly.

“Then I will be happy with whomever you choose, even if it’s not with me.” He said simply.

“What if I don’t ever want to get married?” Merida asked.

“Then I’ll still support you and be your best friend. As long as you’re happy, I’ll support your choice.” Hiccup responded. Merida felt her lip quiver, touched by his selflessness, and embraced him tightly. Hiccup held her close, reveling in the fact that he was holding her at last.

Merida pulled away from him, grinning bashfully, and climbed off of him. Hiccup missed her warmth but didn’t dare push her to do what he wanted. Merida wiped some tears from her eyes, and she gave him a happy smile.

“So, Dragon King, what has happened since I’ve last seen ye…?”

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Here’s a second installment in the Old Friends series! I hope you guys liked it. I might do another one for this series if people really want.

[roads-like-roses]

Just Give Me A Smile (18)

Pairing: Jimin x Jungkook Summary:  Jungkook sucked at human relationships. There were many things he ignored: how to talk to people, what to say, what not to say. Therefore, he was inclined to believe that being alone was his destiny. Oh, how unaware he was of how much a smile with a crooked tooth would mean to him. He didn’t know he could express himself and release his emotions through dancing either. But all it took was a flash of pink hair for that so called destiny to change. Masterlist

The next time Jungkook managed to get a hold of Jimin was almost two weeks later. Jimin chose the place, a warm, little cabin located in the outskirts of the city. It wasn’t a cabin perse, but it made Jungkook feel like it belonged into a forest instead of the grey boring city.

It was cozy, furniture obviously chosen carefully and big windows letting the sun light in. To Jungkook’s surprise, it was deserted and he wondered if Jimin had pick that place for that reason. Jungkook had followed him inside and was inspecting his surroundings without pronouncing a word, when a middle age lady appeared from behind the counter. To say that her smile splitted her face in two was an understatement, she was clearly happy that Jimin was there and Jungkook immediately understood that they knew each other.

-Mina! I didn’t know you would be here today. - Jimin exclaimed, skipping, without noticing, into her arms.

-Oh, but I sensed you would be coming today, dear. With someone new, for what I can see. - The last sentence was added with a spiteful tilt in her tone, one that Jungkook did his best to ignore.

-Well, last time I let him choose, we ended up drinking green coffee.

The lady furrowed her brow comically and dedicated a glance to the younger, for the first time since she had appeared. Jungkook immediately stiffened, but it wasn’t long until Jimin grabbed him by the elbow and carry him to a table near a window. While sitting down, he barely registered Jimin saying something about ‘the usual’. He probably had visited that place with other men before and that’s why Jungkook’s presence had elicited such a… cold reaction from the lady. Still, he was nervous, though not for the woman who had disappeared behind a wooden door.

The sweet smile plastered on the ravenette’s face was similar to the one Jungkook had seen when he had met the boy for the first time, they were so alike that, for a second, a flash of pink overlapped the black tresses surrounding Jimin’s face.

-What’s wrong? - Jimin inquiered, noticing the undisturbed silence. Jungkook shook his head imperceptibly, trying to get a hold of himself.

-Do you come here often? - He asked instead of replying. Jimin leaned his head and Jungkook realized all too late that he didn’t want to know. He wanted to blissfully ignore what Jimin did when they weren’t together, what he’d done all the time they haven’t seen each other.

-Define often. - Was his vague reply, but the sheepish grin he displayed gave him away. - The place is never crowded, Mina is really nice… why wouldn’t I come here?

Jungkook wished he could avoid the topic, he doubted anyone ever brought it up whenever Jimin was with them; the whole point was believing in a happy lie, escaping for a while. But to Jungkook it was more than that, so he couldn’t refrain himself.

-She doesn’t seem to be fond of those who accompany you. - He mentioned, eyes drifting to the last place the woman had occupied.

-If you were in her place, how would you react to the situation? - Jimin rested his head on his hand, left cheek flattened against it, making him look like a pouty child. - But everyone seems to adore this place so I always bring them here. Mina just deals with it.

He shrugged as if it didn’t matter and he glanced towards one of the windows. Deep in thought, Jimin didn’t notice the way Jungkook was staring at his profile, but Mina did. The woman interrupted him by loudly placing his food in front of him. In contrast, she slid Jimin’s dish carefully and showing a warm beam in his direction. Jimin snorted and grabbed her hand, squeezing it for a brief moment, before redirecting his attention to the younger.

-How’s the dancing going?

Mina had left from their side, though Jungkook could feel her eyes boring into the back of his head from where she stood, possibly next to the counter.

-I wouldn’t know, there’s not many opportunities for me to dance, at least yet.

It was weird, talking about their everyday life like normal friends would. He would take it, whatever Jimin offered to him, he would take it. He wanted to know about the elder too, if he had the chance. It was the only little lie he would allow himself to believe: that, maybe, Jimin cared about him somehow, like the old Jimin had in the past. So he talked, despite the deep discomfort that blossomed on his stomach whenever he remembered their current situation.

-The classes are interesting, but I can’t wait to be able to move. - Jimin giggled, half hiding his mouth behind his hand by shifting his head a little. It was too cute, but Jungkook couldn’t bring it up. - Don’t laugh at me!

-You still have Hoseok’s studio, though. Your younger self would’ve been ecstatic by that opportunity alone.

-What do you mean? - He inquired, inspecting his food, which would get cold if he kept ignoring it. He grabbed the spoon next to the plate and sipped tentatively. The soup was delicious.

-You were always kind of… restless, from what I recall. You would only calm down when Hoseok made you practise for several days nonstop. You were like a child high on sugar.

-I was not! - He protested, scowling after resting his spoon on the table. - I did nothing on my free time, so I was excited to experience Hobi’s dance lessons. That‘s all.

Another short laugh from the dark haired man made Jungkook’s stomach twist gleefully. Was he enjoying the company? Jungkook certainly hoped he did. His lips turned into a light smile, barely noticeable, since he didn’t fancy the idea of the elder knowing the effect that a simple laugh from him could evoque.

-Whatever you say, Kookie.

He gasped, hopefully not loudly, though he held no hope.

That nickname. Jimin had used it multiple times before, but it’d been years since he last pronounced it with such… fondness. Jungkook played his astonishment off by forcefully trying to make his doe eyes -that had clearly widened unnaturally- smaller and running his fingers through his hair, dishevelling his previously tidy locks.

-Is that good? - With his chin he pointed to his dish, now abandoned in front of Jungkook. He cleared his throat before replying.

-Yeah, it reminds me of my grandma’s cooking. - Jimin’s eyes crinkled to half moons at the time he nodded, and he stretched his arm across the table.

-Then hold my hand. I deserve it, don’t I?

Jungkook’s hand, tucked under the table, resting on his lap, twitched with the need to fulfill the request from the handsome man, who was unfazed through it all. His cheek was now red after spending so much time under the pressure of his hand; his meal remained untouched.

-Maybe. But please, eat your food first.

Jimin’s eyebrows lifted if only a little, showing his surprise. Jungkook knew that he couldn’t care less about eating, everything revolved around Jungkook and what would make him feel good. That was his self imposed task.

-I remember, you know? - He mentioned as he resumed eating. - In highschool, you usually lacked energy and sometimes passed out. Jin told me it was because you never ate enough.

Abashedly, Jimin averted his glance and a light blush bathed his cheeks, that were round and soft; Jungkook hoped that Jimin took more care of his eating schedule now that he was an adult.

-We all did stupid stuff when we were kids. I thought being skinnier will make me more likeable. -He shrugged. - Won’t you hold my hand? - A fake whine escaped from his mouth as he popped out his bottom lip, a pour attempt of a pout to support his insistence.  

Jungkook hesitantly reached across the table to grab it. Feeling the smooth skin of the back of Jimin’s hand against his fingertips was enough to send shivers down his spine, but he did his best to not show it.

-Everybody liked you a lot, and they would’ve liked you even if you didn’t diet so recklessly. That was the Park Jimin effect. - He whispered, not sure why his voice suddenly seemed so loud in that empty room.

He clasped Jimin’s fingers and ran his thumb over the tan skin a couple of times, before turning it around. With his free hand he picked Jimin’s spoon and carefully located it on his palm, manually wrapping the elder’s fingers around it. Shyly, he gestured towards the bowl of soup before letting go.

-It’s tastier if it’s warm. - He stated, before returning to his own dish one more time.

Jimin seemed dumbstruck for a second, but he recovered pretty soon and started sipping at his soup, while every now and then he picked something from each of the platters Mina had brought with his chopsticks.

They ate mostly in silence and Jungkook found himself surprised that it wasn’t uncomfortable. Maybe for Jimin it was, but judging by his expression he was actually thinking about something instead of dwelling on their lack of conversation.

When Jimin lifted his eyes and fixed them on Jungkook, he smiled by reflex. Not the bunny teeth one that all of his friends adored, just… a little one that he usually displayed for Jimin, even if none of them knew.

-Why do you keep rejecting my advances? - He questioned, not minding to sugar coat his words. Jungkook’s brain short circuited for a moment.- Do you not like me enough?

-I literally just told you that everybody likes you. - He forced himself to say, at loss at how to explain any of this to him.

-Yeah. Yeah, you are right. I know for a fact that you like me. Then what’s your excuse? - He pressed on, little wrinkles forming between his brows.

-I like to take things slow. - He punctuated, trying to make sense with what he replied. - You cannot expect me to-to... to just kiss you.

Jimin tilted his head like kids did when they didn’t understand a concept. Inwardly, Jungkook cooed at the man in front of him, whose eyes were now partially covered by his fringe.

-Jimin. We haven’t spoken in years and the first times we did, we fought. - Jimin sucked his bottom lip between his teeth. - I need to feel comfortable around someone and I’m trying. You have to help me.

-I am doing my best. - He murmured, sounding slightly remorseful, maybe for not thinking about it before.

-I know, but offering skinship and the sort won’t do. I… I feel like I don’t know you, I wanna get know who you’ve become, Jimin.

And Jimin understood.

It wasn’t a privilege he had with each of the guys he dated and he was usually tagged as “old fashioned” by them if they got to know, but he too prefered getting to know the person he was going to be spending time with, no matter the kind of relationship they shared. He owed that to Jungkook, somehow. Maybe Jungkook owed it to him. 

Jungkook’s smile, though… it hurt.

-That’s not… what I do. - He mumbled, trying to understand the currents of thoughts that circled in his head and made him dizzy. - I am...

-Supposed to be a safe haven for this dudes. I got the memo.

This time, he did reach out and grabbed Jimin’s hand. His warmth creeped through Jimin’s arm and he felt himself blush, but not from embarrassment this time. Each and every action from Jungkook proved how sweet the younger could be, how kind his soul was and if Jimin had to describe how being with him felt, he would have to say that it was similar to jumping to a pool filled with flower petals: soothing, tender against his aching body, kind to his aching soul. It felt like a once in a lifetime experience, one that he wished would repeat endlessly because it made his skin tingle and his heart flutter.

He was greedy, so very greedy.

-You know…

Jungkook’s voice seep through his confused mind until it was all he could hear.

-It’s been bothering me what you said that time. - His round eyes were focused on the napkin but Jimin’s couldn’t move from the young man who had captivated him so long ago. He wondered which of his words had annoyed him and wished he could take them back. - You said that you willingly became a place for them to be themselves.

-What’s wrong with that? - He asked, for he could not see why it would bother Jungkook. The younger’s lips were pressed into a line while he considered what he could answer.

-You’re not a place. - He claimed, firmly. He barely opened his mouth, but his words were crystal clear.

A couple of seconds ticked by and no one spoke again. Jimin could hear Mina moving at the back of the shop, cleaning or just moving around as he contemplated whether what Jungkook had said made any sense.

-I… I mean. - It was the first time Jungkook stuttered while speaking, and he wondered what had caused such a reaction, but decided to keep on listening instead of commenting on it. - You are not a place, you are a person, Jiminie. - The nickname slipped away before he could avoid it, so he kept talking to try and make its echo disappear from his ears.

-You are a person and you deserve a safe haven too.

He was displaying a stern expression - one that didn’t fit his soft features at all, in Jimin’s opinion, - letting him know that he would not accept to be contradicted. Inside of Jimin’s chest, something blossomed and he had to physically contain it, rubbing his free hand over the spot that felt so warm and yet so cold, if such sensation was even possible. He instinctively tried to squeeze Jungkook’s hand, the one he was still holding, but he refrained himself at the last second.

-You’re too kind, Jungkook. - He murmured, a light smile dancing on his lips.

-I’m just the normal type of kind. - He clarified. -The others are just assholes.

Jimin chuckled and the brightness in his face came as a breath of fresh air to the younger who, from the very first day, had doubted that his plan would work. He was not sure how he could help Jimin, but making him smile, letting him laugh, felt like a step in the right direction. He could only hope that it was real, that it wasn’t part of the act he put up.

Someone clearing their throat interrupted their exchange, and they both turned around at the same time to find Mina holding two bowls with ice cream on her tray. She placed one in front on Jimin - the one with the biggest amount - and then slided the other to Jungkook.

-It’s on the house.

She left as fast as she’d appeared and Jungkook couldn’t help the dumbfounded expression from expanding on his face.

-That means she likes you. - Jimin translated, excitedly eyeing the desert like he couldn’t pick which flavour to eat first.

-Who wouldn’t like me? - He mumbled around the spoon that was already in his mouth, full of chocolate ice cream.

Who wouldn’t like you? Jimin wondered silently, knowing fairly well that everybody adored the younger. Who wouldn’t, when his fluffy brown hair was long enough to fall over his eyes; when his huge and bright smile -the one that showed all his teeth, Jimin’s favourite- was constantly on display; when wrinkles formed around his eyes whenever his beam was too big to be contained within the limits of his face. He was open now, he participated in people’s conversations and followed the dialogues with big eyes filled with curiosity and interest. He did sometimes become shy and try to shrink into himself a little, but he…

Jimin stopped himself before his dumb mind enunciated any more qualities of the young man in front of him. He couldn't do that to himself.

He couldn’t do that to Jungkook.

Jimin plastered the casual expression he showed all of his dates, the one that made them feel important, as if they had his entire attention. Jungkook eyed him suspiciously, like he could tell the exact moment he switched his demeanour. Jimin doubted he could, but for a slight moment he could feel himself hesitate. Unders his stare, Jimin felt ugly.

-You’re indeed charming.- He lifted his arm and used his thumb to gently rub some smeared strawberry ice cream off from above his upper lip. His finger lingered in the corner of his mouth and slowly he brought it back to his own mouth to lick the melted ice cream. Jungkook stared at him in awe, but Jimin couldn’t tell if it was the good kind of awe. If things were different, he would’ve teased him, told him how charming it was to have an ice cream mostacho and laughed at Jungkook’s -probably- offended expression. He couldn’t, though, it was dangerous and Jimin was weak, in every sense of the word.

He raised an eyebrow, defiantly, daring Jungkook to bring it up. His reply was a mere scoff. - Eat yours and lemme eat mine. By the time we’re done, we’ll see if there’s anything left for you to clean.

He was taunting him, Jungkook was acting as if he wasn’t affected by what Jimin had done, when he knew for a fact that it had. Jungkook was better at concealing his emotions now and Jimin understood that maybe they did need to get to know each other again. In Jimin’s case, it was a necessity if he wanted to please the younger; he had to discover his limits and what was expected of him.

-Focus on eating like a goddamned adult then.- He whispered, face turned towards his own bowl, spoon already filled with the dessert.

-What did you say? - Jungkook opened his mouth at mid-bite, which caused some of the food to slip from it and land onto the tablecloth. Jimin rolled his eyes.

-Nothing.

And they shared the silence while they enjoyed their dessert. It was notoriously different from the first encounter, in which everything had been awkward. Now, they were just… there, coexisting, not minding if there wasn’t anything to say; the words would come when they had to.

-I don’t know if it’s my place. - Jungkook mentioned once he was done. -But I’m curious… are all your dates like this?

Jimin let his hand surround the cup with the remaining of his ice cream; it was still cold and through his palm, the sensation travelled along his forearm. His glace fell to Jungkook’s lips, now tinted a deep pink due to the constant contact with the cold.

Jimin yearned to kiss them.

He wet his own mouth with his tongue to erase the tingles that suddenly attacked him at the sight and tightened his hold on the cup in his grip. He would not usually speak about that with whoever accompanied him, but it was Jungkook, it wasn’t just someone and he had to admit that. They’d known each other for a while after all. Plus, he couldn’t stop thinking about his damned lips…

-Not at all, most of them are far more interesting than you. - He found himself informing without noticing.

-’M sorry. - Jimin rolled his eyes and used his almost frozen hand to flick Jungkook in the forehead. - What was that for?

-I would expect you to know me better than that, Kook. I was kidding, jesus. Cannot believe I have to actually explain that to you.

Jungkook snorted humorlessly and brought his fingertips to the now red spot on his forehead, to massage it soothingly, as he pouted. Jimin was beginning to smile when his phone buzzed and he was brutally reminded of  who he had to meet next. His smile fell off instantaneously, but to discover how much time he had actually spent with Jungkook calmed his anxiety a little bit.

-I have to go. But if you want, I can answer all your questions next time.

He tried to sound flirty, but it probably came as the exact opposite. He was tired, so, so tired and he wanted to stay. To stay with Jungkook who had eased his restless brain and allowed his soul to breath. It was a revelation, really, that the younger could have that effect on him. Jimin might get something out of their meetings after all.

If Jungkook was disappointed, he didn’t show it, instead beaming dazzlingly. Jungkook could be Apollo's son, for right then it seemed like the sun was hidden within his chest and its light overflowed through his smile. Jimin’s energy was instantly recharged and he inwardly thanked the younger for it.

He returned the gesture, entirely sure that he was not even close to making Jungkook feel an ounce of what his smile had.

Letting his eyes wander to the other’s pink lips, he imagine how sweet they would taste after so much ice cream, but had to push those thoughts to the back of his brain. He didn’t want to make him uncomfortable and Jungkook had been clear enough. Jimin wanted to kiss him, but he wouldn't. Not until he explicitly allowed it.

He settled for ruffling his hair when he stood up and making sure the younger would call him again -soon, if it was possible- before walking away.

As he crossed the door, Jungkook’s eyes met with Mina’s.

[redscullyrevival]

I finally saw The Last Jedi and I liked it - what I wasn’t entirely anticipating is that I also really enjoyed it! I will now commence bullet point blabbering about the film below the cut and it shall not be spoiler free. 

I now understand all the raging nerd-hate this movie has been getting - this film aimed to straight up burn this motherfucker down, huh? 

Loved it. 

Personally I was very… underwhelmed with The Force Awakens. It was a fun romp and I loved the new characters and the nostalgic twinge of the familiar but oh boy the entire thing felt far too beholden to the pedestal of A STAR WARS FILM! in slow steady blinking lights. 

The Force Awakens has that octane Abrams pacing but it is also just so damn stiff. So ridged. And obviously deeply afraid to wander off the path. 

I understand that the first re-introduction to such a beloved franchise playing it (excruciatingly) safe made sense; but I was still upset with the final product, with the final choice to deliberately aim to be nothing more than what I’ve seen and felt before.

The Last Jedi on the other hand turns out to be a long, cozy, chat about how A STAR WARS FILM! should be struck down so something new can grow. 

Hallelujah!

The visceral attack this film must feel like to a particular kind of Star Wars fan is no doubt very intense and in all honestly I do have some pity for folks who found this new film to be dismissing the legacy they feel connected to in deeply personal ways. 

*clappy hands*

But oh, I loved it so much!

Every twist and turn, every aspect of this film pushes the anticipated rhythm of A STAR WARS FILM! away; all the momentum the film gains is for the final purpose of rejecting everything easy and expected, for pushing past, well, the past. 

Hot damn, the nerds are kind of justified for once.

The Last Jedi came for them! It went so hard! The more someone had dug themselves into the belief that STAR WARS was a solid thing they knew and understood on a fundamental core level then the deeper the cut would go as the film raged on. 

The anger, the hate from certain fandom circles makes total sense. 

Because this film done changed the Star Wars. 

And it was about fuckin’ time. 

So prepared was I to sit through The Empire Strikes Back: The Remix that the intense gut fans-hate-it reaction the film got opening friggin’ day got me all kinds of delighted, how I saw it such a reaction signaled that this new film would be something actually new. 

And the fresh air of The Last Jedi comes from some pretty drastic subversion of A STAR WARS FILM! It is down right beautiful.

Ultimately, if the choice to change Star Wars was just to grim dark and edge it up then it’d be pretty terrible I agree, but The Last Jedi managed to alter and course correct massive change without breaking the frame of the how and the why and to whom these STAR WARS stories are told. 

I mean, in my opinion anyway. 

I felt the film put a lot of care and love into explaining to the audience what was right and natural about change, explaining that strength could be found in letting go of our nostalgia and expectations and opening up to new experiences in old sandboxes. I felt The Last Jedi was an oddly gentle film that knew it was going to frighten some while igniting others and did it’s best to show it’s good will towards signaling hope and legend and legacy into a shared experience. 

*shrug shrug shrug* YA FEELIN’ ME?!

I know I already have a spoiler warning above the cut but now I am going to really get up in this film and push my eyeball up against it’s eyeball and hey if you wanna see all particulars feel free, but this is now specific spoiler territory, thanks and happy holidays:

I was so enthralled with Finn and Rose’s quest and I was ecstatic when it didn’t work out.

The two went on a space goose chase for a daring rescue mission and got into ruffian escapades and thought on the fly and were brave and funny and were livin’ that STAR WARS life - and they failed spectacularly.

Their mission, their rip’roarin’ escapade, was in fact a brash and ill thought out plan that almost got absolutely everyone killed. 

Precious, lovely, daring, and confident Poe Dameron was a horrible leader. 

His belief in a desperate gamble; his total confidence that he was in the right and the stuffy Vice Admiral didn’t know when to take a risk; the audience knowing his qualities as sure fire STAR WARS leadership was all for nothing and people died for it. 

I said HOT DAMN!

This film made General Organa and Vice Admiral Holdo, two older women who don’t run around with blasters in hand but who have no less twinkle in their eyes the true leaders of the resistance. The true bearers of the spark of rebellion. It was their matured tried and true mentorship that ended up saving them all - not the cocky charisma of a younger good looking man.

Also Leia is confirmed Force Sensitive™ bringing to an end decades long old guard fans bickering and moaning over if she has pretend magical powers or not and why if she did that’d be “not right”. 

(Seeing Carrie Fisher bathed in moonlight was emotional)

And then, oh man, Rey’s parents? Wonderful, soulful, bright and strong Rey? Because she is in a STAR WARS film and can use the force everyone including people who’ve never seen The Force Awakens assumed her parents were a part of the legacy, a part of the grand scheme.

NOPE.

In fact, to really drive it home just so fans can’t possibly be confused, Kylo Ren tells her “You’re nobody. You don’t belong in this story.”

He said that with his mouth words!

But there she is all the same, good old Rey. And she’ll remain. Without being so and so from extended universe’s kid or a character only in some comic book or Luke’s secret child or whatever. 

Rey is just a character made to be there and to use the force because, hey, it’s a STAR WARS MOVIE! We needed someone to be the Luke this time around so why not Rey? 

PS we shattered Luke’s lightsaber and made Rey indebted to jack squat of this franchise. She searched for her purpose and her parents and only found the strength of herself and her own choices. Peace out!

That tickled me senseless, having the cultural institution of STAR WARS being full on assaulted for two and a half hours.

That tickled my pickle. 

The Last Jedi is hyper self aware media, but it was still fun. It was still a good time but it laid down hard and fast with changing the lifeblood of STAR WARS that even I, who is nowhere near as big a fan as someone you could probably hit with a stone’s throw, admit to feeling some uncomfortable chafing at times while watching.

STAR WARS is a legit cultural institution by the way, I didn’t just say that for the fun of it - that’s absolutely 100% true. 

Star Wars as a media, as a franchise, has an ebb and flow of patterns, style, symbols, and motifs that dictate a tonal cohesiveness which designates something as recognizable as STAR WARS.  

What I’m doing when I all caps “Star Wars” is I’m trying to defer attention to the known concepts and ideas of Star Wars media as a whole cultural institution and experience rather than just invoking a cluster of films, only I’m trying to do all that just through the written word.

Star Wars is a film and STAR WARS is all that which defines the franchise as well as our shared cultural understanding of said franchise, ya fell me? That’s how I approach talking about this kinda stuff online anyways. I feel most will understand what I’m doing with the capitalization and all that but hey, now ya know ‘fo sure. 

Anyway

Shit y’all! Luke Skywalker is a funky sore spot huh? Loved that too. 

Lets get to that Kylo Ren:

Kylo Ren’s entire set up is that he ain’t Vader and fuck, ain’t that the truth. But in a good way. Duh Kylo Ren is not Vader, he is a different character. And, now, he isn’t even remotely similar to Vader as a STAR WARS character. 

Everything about Kylo Ren is opposed to Darth Vader; while he gain’s definition with this new film Kylo Ren didn’t even remotely start out as a mysterious villain like Vader originally did. 

We all knew, in that STAR WARS fashion, that Kylo Ren had to be tied to the legacy. We all knew that he had to be tied to the lifeblood of the franchise. And Ben Solo absolutely is. 

We knew this before Han ever revealed it through dialogue and that’s why it wasn’t a big reveal in The Force Awakens. Of course Ben Solo turned to the dark side and is Kylo Ren. Of course. Of course he has some weird Vader obsession, the character needed to emulate Vader so as to take up his mantel in the narrative and in the franchise. We needed a baddie in a helmet, stat!

But oh, look what has happened though, oh man:

Luke Skywalker in a moment of fear almost murdered his own nephew  -because he is in STAR WARS. 

We all know if there are Jedi then there is a light and a dark side of the force; we all know that if you are a master of and a teacher in the ways of the force you open yourself and your students up to a choice; and we all know that fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, and hate leads to suffering. 

Kylo Ren being a direct response to Luke friggin’ Skywalker is as far from Vader as you can get but fits just so right within the cleansing fire that is The Last Jedi. 

The hero of the first saga ignited the villain of the next. 

That ain’t very STAR WARS and something tells me that is the biggest kick to the crotch for a lot of folks. 

I, of course, dug the hell outta that choice.

Kylo Ren is actually interesting now. Mischief managed.

The very not subtle social commentary the film was dishing out was a pretty pie to boot. Bit on the nose but hey, ain’t that STAR WARS at least? Didn’t even have to dig this time around, gems sitting right on the surface.  

… Damn, I’m tired. I still have plenty to talk about though. Hmm, well, lets close this out on a different note (and that’s a pun):

The music of STAR WARS is bonkers recognizable. Like, I keep saying Star Wars is a cultural institution that uses motifs and symbols as devices for defining itself, right? Yeah, the use of music in this film is a pitch perfect example of that. 

The Last Jedi seamlessly flows from theme to theme, with specific well known scores highlighting emotional call backs and in-story referenced characters - the use of music is the most traditionalist aspect of this new film (they even shook up the editing this time around - shock and awe). 

Smart though, if they fucked with how STAR WARS did music then even an impassive twerp like me would be pretty upset. 

For my money, the musical score is still the best thing about a good old Star War.