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relenafanel · 4 years

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Dicks (in every definition): a fake-relationship AU

Geralt/Jaskier

Find it on Ao3: Dicks (in every definition) by relenafanel

FOR THE MODERN AU CHALLENGE. WEEK 1: Fake-Relationships

Tag: witcherauseptember

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“I can’t believe anyone could be such an unmitigated puss-filled dick,” Essi said, staring at her phone in disbelief. Jaskier groaned and let his head thunk on the bar.

“I can.” His sticky forehead was the least disgusting part of the evening. He'd just come out to forget his ex, and maybe celebrate being free a little (as fucked up as that was) and quite frankly felt attacked by his social media.

“If I believed it from anyone it would be that narcissist,” she conceded, biting on her lip.

“I know,” Jaskier agreed. “That’s the worst part. I feel like it’s my fault being blindsided by this, as though I should have known something was going to happen today.”

Essi snorted. “It’s not your fault your ex is the worst.”

“No, but I was with him for almost 3 years. I don’t know. That’s my fault.”

“Don’t be stupid,” she said. “Look at this desperate fucker. Do you actually think he’s winning? He might be in a new relationship but the look of this guy makes my vagina want to shrivel up and die.”

Jaskier took her phone from her and looked again. Yeah. Yikes. Valdo was definitely scraping the bottom of the barrel with that one. Jaskier hadn’t even tried to join any dating sites post-breakup, but he was pretty sure there were better options. It wasn’t even the guy’s looks so much as he just screamed skeevy douchebag. It was making Jaskier’s metaphorical vagina also want to die.

“You need to get drunk. Maybe laid.”

“No,” Jaskier said, an idea starting to form as he looked at the relationship status change. “No. I need to match pettiness with pettiness. I need to find someone so hot that I’d have trouble getting him - let alone Valdo with his sad, small dick - and make sure to post a picture on Facebook.”

“Would that make you feel better?”

Jaskier smiled with teeth. “I think it would.”

***

It was their third bar of the evening and Essi was definitely sick of the manhunt. She probably hadn’t realized that when Jaskier was judging men fully objectively and not looking for matching personalities (relationship goals) or a willing body (one night stand goals) he had incredibly discerning tastes.

Probably too discerning.

“How about him?” Essi asked, barely looking up from her phone. She gestured to a guy sitting at the bar trying to make eye contact with a woman across the room.

“Ehh,” Jaskier said. “Sweater vest.”

Essi rolled her eyes. “But cute.”

“I’m not looking for cute. I’m looking for eye-searing hot.”

“I’m having trouble remembering how you’ve ever been in any relationships with these unrealistic expectations.”

“Valdo thought I was hot.” Jaskier thought about that for a moment. “Did I stay with someone for three years out of flattery?”

“Probably. Fuck. Get therapy.”

“I am.”

“You’re going to be working on tonight for a while.”

Fucking true. “Oh god, we just saw Valdo’s taste in men. Tell me true… am I ugly.”

“You’re spiraling.”

“That’s not an answer!”

“You’re spiraling!”

“Yes,” Jaskier agreed, pulling at his hair. “I’m so aware.”

“Based on the guy in his status update I’m going to guess you’re the hottest guy he could get.”

“You’re a good friend.” Jaskier pressed his head against her shoulder.

Then, a table opened up across the room, revealing the man sitting on the other side of it. “Holy shit.”

Essi looked up. Then she looked up. “Wow.”

“I hope he’s into men,” Jaskier said. “Or at least willing to play along with pretending to be for long enough for you to get a picture.”

“You’re going to walk up to that?” Essi asked. “You have more balls than brains.”

That was probably true.

***

“Hi, I’m Jaskier,” he opened with, dropping into the seat across from the gorgeous man. Up close he was even more startlingly pretty, with a chin dimple that highlighted his strong jaw and drew attention to his mouth. “And my boyfriend broke up with me two months ago, only to post his new relationship on Facebook today. Our three year anniversary. It’s the dickest of moves, right?”

The man hummed in agreement, but otherwise didn’t stop frowning in Jaskier’s general direction. Like someone waiting for him to get to the point. Jaskier saw that frown often.

“The reason for the oversharing is that I just forced my best friend to follow me to three different bars to find someone so phenomenally hot for me to spend time with and get picture proof, and here you are. I’d do jazz hands but you don’t seem like someone who responds well to jazz hands.”

“What are jazz hands?”

Whoa.

What a voice. What a sexy, sexy voice. Jaskier knew what he was talking about. He was a connoisseur of voices.

Jaskier wiggled his fingers at him. Tada! “Jazz hands.”

“Huh.” The man took a drink of his beer. “You want to use me as a revenge plot?”

“Exactly. Can I buy you a drink?”

The man gestured to his mostly full beer. “I’m not drinking to get drunk tonight.”

That was only a no to the beer. “Nachos or some other foodstuff?”

The guy seemed possibly interested in food.

“Fine,” he agreed.

****

Facebook: Julian Alfred Pankratz is in a relationship with Geralt of Rivia.

“Who’s Julian Pankratz?” Geralt muttered, staring at his phone.

“What?” Jaskier groaned, coming out a shitty sleep to a few realizations:

He’d gone home with the hottest guy on earth, which he should be pleased about, AND WAS PLEASED ABOUT

He might throw up

He’d done something last night. Something he’d said “that’s up for tomorrow Jaskier to sort out” because his drunk self was apparently a fucking masochist, and now Jaskier wasn’t really sure what that was.

Only Geralt was still scowling at his phone and seemed to know his real name.

So.

“Fuck,” Jaskier groaned. His mouth tasted like nachos and the regret of doing shots too late in life. He was 28 years old, not dead, but his hangover didn’t seem to know that. “We didn’t get married , did we?”

“...”

Jaskier risked the light filtering in through the edges of the blinds to look at Geralt. His hair was beyond mussed - Jaskier didn’t know hair could get that tangled overnight. He was still frowning at his phone.

“I’ve been calling you Jaskier.”

“I go by Jaskier,” he promised. He was too busy having his own crises to deal with Geralt’s! For fucksakes. “Now, back to the marriage thing??”

“No.”

Phew. That was probably on him. He wasn’t sure people could actually get fake married overnight. Legally. He’d seen a lot of movies, though.

Ok. Next problem. “I might throw up.”

Geralt turned his head slowly to look at him. Yikes. Too much beautiful-man-face in his face for this early in the morning.

“It’s eleven,” Geralt told him in the dry tone that told Jaskier he’d said that all outloud.

“Eleven after getting to bed at what? Five? Eugh, boo. Do you have any food?”

***

Geralt did have food.

Well, Geralt had protein bars and electrolytes, which was basically the same thing. Jaskier could always fall on top of a burger on his way home if he had to. He’d finally looked at his phone by the time he was halfway through his breakfast.

107 new notifications.

What the fuck?

Julian Alfred Pankratz is in a relationship with Geralt of Rivia

Geralt and I were going to wait until announcing this wasn’t an asshole move, but now that it doesn’t really matter, I just wanted everyone to know that I’m doing GREAT.

Attached to it was the picture of the two of them together that Essi had taken with the caption of “I wouldn’t feel too sorry for Jaskier tonight”

His drunk self had a lot to answer for. No wonder Geralt had been scowling at his phone.

“I can’t believe I went Facebook Official with someone I haven’t even had sex with yet,” Jaskier mourned. “What is it, 2007?”

***

It took Jaskier almost the full day to recover enough to actually look through his comments on Facebook. By the time he had, they’d almost doubled and he’d made the mistake of clicking into Instagram to find one of those quintessential happy-relationship-our-feet-are-cute-together bullshit pictures. He had a different following on Instagram, mostly using it for pictures of himself singing.

Yikes. Yikes. Yikes. This wasn’t a contained problem, if you could call their mutual friends and families on Facebook that had been gathering in the wings for 15 years a contained problem . Fucking Facebook. Jaskier friended people he’d met once. He had a database of acquaintances. It was great for - you know - being a musician looking for gigs. He’d done 15 weddings in the last year.

It was pretty shitty when he’d faked having a boyfriend so people wouldn’t feel bad for him.

But, as he read through the comments and realized that some of them weren’t for him, he realized that maybe he wasn’t the one with the biggest problem.

Jaskier: Did you just come out?

Jaskier: Are you EVEN INTO MEN?

Jaskier: I REMEMBER YOU THINKING THIS WAS FUNNY AND AGREEING TO IT

Jaskier: BUT

Jaskier: I REGRET COMMITTING TO CAPS SO SOON BECAUSE I MEAN THIS IN CAPS AND BOLDED

Jaskier: WHOEVER LAMBERT IS JUST CONGRATULATED YOU ON FINALLY GETTING DICKED DOWN BECAUSE IT MIGHT MAKE YOU LESS GRUMPY

Geralt: I see you’ve read the comments

Geralt: my brother

Jaskier: YOUR BROTHER?!

Geralt: bold and caps?

Jaskier: and italics what the fuck. Why’d you let me do this?

Jaskier: wait.

Jaskier: WAIT

Geralt: there it is

Jaskier: this was your idea

Jaskier: did you use me to tell everyone you know that you’re gay or bi or whatever you identify as?

Jaskier: what a brilliant opportunity last night was for both of us

Geralt: you went back to sleep and didn’t process any of this yet, didn’t you?

Jaskier had been seen with that, fuck. He made a face at his phone even though Geralt couldn't see it.

A few moments later a response to Lambert popped up from Geralt himself.

@Lambert who says I haven’t been getting dicked down this entire time you heteronormative asshole

Followed by someone named Yennefer posting a picture of a strap on.

Who were these people? Could you love someone based on how their friends reacted to their ill-advised fake-relationship status change? Asking for a friend.

Geralt: for context, that’s my ex-wife

Geralt: we’re ok

Geralt: especially when she’s helping me fuck with my brother

***

Jaskier was debating the merits of asking Geralt if he wanted to come up with a break-up plan or just date when another comment showed up.

Vesemir left a comment:

You’ll bring him to brunch tomorrow?

Geralt left a comment:

We’ll be there

Vesemir left a comment:

Leave the frightening device at home

Geralt left a comment:

He doesn’t need it

This was followed by a string of variations of LOL and OH SHITs from about 7 different people. Jaskier watched it all unfold feeling like he’d stepped into the middle of something he didn’t understand - yet. He was definitely in trouble, if the way his heart rate increased at Geralt’s he doesn’t need it was any indication. It wasn’t even the dick reference, though that was amazing. It was the snappy, quick response. The underlying sarcasm.

Jaskier had a type. He could end a fake relationship that was based on seeing a searing hot guy across a room, but it was a bit harder when the guy had a personality he liked. If Geralt turned out to have a heart of gold, Jaskier was screwed and would probably be proposing marriage by year’s end.

Yeah, we’ll be there , he commented.

Geralt: my dad

Geralt: thanks

Jaskier: no problem

Jaskier : gonna call

“So I’m thinking,” Jaskier said the moment Geralt’s face showed up on the video call. He was squinting at his phone like no one had ever tried to video call him before.

“Hi,” Geralt replied, looking amused.

“I’ve been debating the merits of planning a breakup for our fake relationship or just… dating? I’m thinking maybe we should date? Do you have input?”

“Dating’s fine.”

“But do you… are you even attracted to me? Would you pick me?”

Oh fuck, what was that?! Something new to bring up in therapy.

Geralt tilted his head. “You don’t know this about me yet, but I’m capable of saying no. Overly capable, some of my family might tell you.”

“So you’re not saying no?”

“I’m pretty confident I said yes instead.”

***

“As Jaskier’s best friend and the only witness,” Essi said into the microphone, holding up a glass of champagne to salute the two of them. “Our happy couple gave me full permission to tell the story of what happened the night Geralt and Jaskier met. Like Jaskier himself, the story is partially an embarrassing tale of bad decisions, half-cocked plans, and a lot of heart.”

Jaskier grinned, and nudged his shoulder into Geralt’s.

“And,” Essi continued with glee, “dicks in every definition.”

#geralt of rivia #jaskier #witcherauseptember #the witcher #fanfiction: drabble #fake relationship

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thecassadilla · 4 years

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Of All the Apples

Pairing: Kristanna

Word Count: 3,752/AO3

Summary: Though Kristoff is uncertain about his relationship with Anna, he agrees to go apple picking with her, where he is forced to confront his feelings.

Author’s Note: Though Kristoff is uncertain about his relationship with Anna, he agrees to go apple picking with her, where he is forced to confront his feelings.

Author’s Note: Okay, so there may be a teeny bit of projection here - I really wanted to go apple or pumpkin picking at some point during this month. I doubt it’ll happen, so I may as well just write about other people doing the things that I want to do, right? Anyways, for some strange reason this was *incredibly* difficult to write - I think I revised it 30 times. I still don’t know if I’m completely satisfied, to be honest. I don't even know if it makes any sense?? But I'm just going to post it anyway. Enjoy!!!

Hearing the doorbell ring had become a familiar and expected sound. Every single day, around the same time, Anna rang the bell and patiently stood on Kristoff’s doorstep. She waited to be invited inside, even though he had told her multiple times to just come inside when she felt like it. He left the door unlocked for a reason, after all.

“Come in!” he called. He heard the door open and close from where he was, and dainty footsteps made their way towards the living room. In no time at all, she had made it to the couch, quietly collapsing into the empty spot next to him. For some reason, it made him think back to the first time they had met.

He remembered it like it had happened yesterday instead of a year ago. He’d just moved into his new rental - the tiniest house on the street - which happened to be right next door to the grandiose mansion Anna and her sister had inherited from their deceased parents. Anna, still very much a stranger at this point, had shown up on his doorstep with a store bought box of chocolate cupcakes. After apologizing profusely for not baking them herself, oversharing about her lack of skills in the kitchen, and apologizing again for assuming he’d like chocolate, she handed him the box and welcomed him to the neighborhood. That very day, he fell in love with the girl who lived next door.

She walked into his life on her own volition and for some reason that he couldn’t understand, she kept coming back. Since their initial meeting, much had changed. Before he knew it, she was spending more time at his house than she was at her own, and they were sharing intimate conversations and passionate kisses. Their relationship evolved before his own eyes - from neighbors, to friends, to starting an incredibly fulfilling sexual relationship.

Despite the fact that he was completely and utterly in love with her, he spent nearly every waking hour convincing himself that she’d never want to be more than what they currently were; that every shared moment between them was some form of pageantry as opposed to something very, very real.

Instead of believing in the possibility that she could be as in love with him as he was with her, he attempted and failed to keep her at an arm's length; she was intoxicating and it was too difficult to stay away from her, no matter how much he knew that it would hurt when it ended and she moved on with someone else. So, he kept his feelings to himself and never defined their relationship.

But today, something was off. She wasn’t acting like her normal, perky self; she was quiet.

“What’s wrong?” he finally asked.

“Nothing is wrong per se,” she answered with a sigh. “But I have a question for you and I think that I already know what the answer is going to be.”

“Go for it,” he encouraged her.

“I know you hate going places, but I really want to go apple picking tomorrow, and I was hoping that you’d want to come along with me.” She gave him a hopeful smile, batting her eyelashes at him.

Though she always attempted to make plans with him outside of the house, they rarely went out in public together and when they did, it was only to the grocery store. He was too afraid to be seen with her because in his eyes, a guy like him didn’t deserve a girl like her. “Oh. I don’t really think I’ll be useful -”

“You’d be useful!” she insisted enthusiastically. “Because you’re so tall! And I would really love to go with you. Can you please come apple picking with me?”

“I don’t know,” he answered, shifting uncomfortably in his seat. Somehow it was the best answer that he could come up with. He didn’t have a real reason to say no, but he wasn’t sure if it was a good idea to say yes, either. He cleared his throat. “Elsa’s busy?”

She forced out a laugh. “Bold of you to assume that Elsa wants to spend her day off with me.”

“I’m sorry,” he frowned.

Any hope she had quickly melted away and her shoulders slumped in defeat. “It’s okay, I get it. I can go by myself, I guess.”

She moved to stand up, and acting on an impulse, he grabbed her hand, knowing that he may come to regret it. “Wait!”

She turned to face him. “What?”

“If it’s really that important to you, then I’ll go with you.”

She hardly gave him a chance to finish before she was throwing her arms around his neck. “Thank you, Kristoff!”

He awkwardly patted her back. “You’re welcome.”

She pulled away suddenly. “Oh crap, I forgot my phone charger at home! I’m just going to go grab it and I’ll be right back, okay?”

He nodded, and she smiled before rushing out of the house.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

He wasn’t sure what time she had snuck out of his bed that morning, but she was gone when he woke up just after ten. She hardly ever woke up before him, and it was even more unusual for her to have left at all. He rubbed at his eyes a few times before reaching for his phone, and sure enough, she had sent him a text explaining her whereabouts. She was right next door, in her own house, getting ready for their excursion. He sighed, knowing that she must have been extremely excited to have gotten up so early when they weren’t even leaving for several more hours.

So, he climbed out of bed, aware of the fact that for the first Saturday in a long time, Anna wasn’t with him. He had grown used to their sleepy weekend mornings together, half-dressed and sitting at his kitchen table with plates of pancakes in front of them. Without her there, he followed his weekday routine; he ate, showered and got dressed, keeping it casual with jeans and a black t-shirt layered under a red flannel. And then, he waited.

When the time had finally come, he went out and stood by her car, hoping that she’d be out soon. His jaw nearly dropped when she finally did. Clad in a grey v-neck sweater and light wash skinny jeans, she paired the outfit with ankle boots. Her hair was half-up, half-down and softly curled.

“Hey,” she smiled when she saw him waiting. “You ready to go?”

“Born ready. You look great, by the way.”

“So do you, I really like that flannel. You should wear red more often.”

“Thanks,” he blushed, looking down at his shirt. “Aren’t you worried about getting dirty though? We’re going to be walking around in the dirt.”

She laughed. “I don’t plan on rolling around in the dirt.”

“I know, but I don’t want you to ruin your shoes or something.”

“It’ll be fine,” she assured him, before unlocking the car doors and tossing her purse in the backseat. “Climb in.”

He did as he was told, sliding into the passenger seat.

“This is kind of a rare occurrence, huh? Me driving you somewhere,” she observed aloud as she started the engine. She crossed the seatbelt over her lap and glanced over at him.

He shrugged. “I like driving.”

“Yeah, but you’re not my chauffeur. I should drive you around more,” she remarked. “Which would mean that we’d have to go out more.”

He shook his head. “I don’t...we shouldn’t -“

“Oh god, do you think I’m a bad driver?”

“What? No!”

“I swear, I’ve only gotten one speeding ticket in my entire life and I wasn’t even going that fast.”

“Anna, your driving is fine. I was just going to say that you don’t have to worry about driving me around because we shouldn’t really be going places together.”

“Okay then,” she responded, noticeably taken aback. “May I ask why you think that?”

“It just seems like a bad idea.”

“So going to dinner after this is out of the question?”

“We could order takeout,” he suggested. “Or I can cook for you.”

She muttered something inaudible and for a few miles they sat quietly, listening to the radio. He stared out the window and admired the fall foliage, hoping that the day would go by smoothly.

Anna finally spoke up when they were about a mile from the orchard. “So, I want to get enough apples to bake a pie -”

He snorted. “You? Bake a pie?”

“Yeah,” she answered confidently. “I know I’m not great in the kitchen but I’ve never made an apple pie before and I want to try. I could really use your help.”

He glared at her. “Do I look like I’ve made an apple pie before?”

“No, but you’re more competent in the kitchen than I am.”

“Cooking is straightforward. Baking is precise. You mis-measure one ingredient and the entire thing is ruined,” he explained. “That’s why whenever you mention wanting dessert, I always go to the store and buy it.”

“I know the grocery store sells pre-made pie crusts. We can stop there after the orchard, and then that’s one less thing to worry about.”

“I did a little research about the orchard that we’re going to and they sell pies in their store,” he pointed out. “You can save yourself the stress and just buy one.”

“But what’s the fun in that?”

“I guess that’s why we’re going to a farm to buy apples and not to the grocery store,” he remarked, rolling his eyes.

“This is what people do in October. Apple picking, pumpkin picking, corn mazes. It’s fun!”

“They do that stuff to get likes on the Internet, too.”

She didn’t answer, but simply pursed her lips.

He sighed. “Let me guess, you want me to take pictures of you for Instagram?”

“Maybe.”

“Why don’t you stop at a Starbucks and get a pumpkin spice latte to pose with while you’re at it?”

“Rude.”

“It’s what people do in October,” he said, mimicking her sentiment from moments ago.

“Stop criticizing fall, it’s my favorite season. And I’ve never had a pumpkin spice latte, so ha,” she said, before sticking her tongue out at him.

“I’m not criticizing fall. I’m criticizing what people do in fall.”

“As we’re pulling into the parking lot of an apple orchard, to pick apples.”

“Your idea, not mine,” he reminded her.

“You agreed to come, mister.”

“Because you need someone to grab the hard to reach apples for you. Remember?”

She shook her head, though a knowing smile spread across her face. “Can you at least try to have fun?”

“No promises,” he answered, a small smile of his own appearing.

The lot was packed with cars, but she was able to find an empty spot with ease. They climbed out of the car, and walked toward the picking area. The attendant at the entrance handed Anna a basket, provided some instructions for them to follow, and told them that the apples would be weighed for purchase when they finished their walk-through.

When they finally entered the picking area, Anna spoke up. “What should we do first? Apples or pictures?”

He shrugged. “Up to you.”

“Apples first, then.”

There were kids and families everywhere, running from tree to tree, snapping pictures, and chattering away. They walked side-by-side along the center path, trying to avoid bumping into the other people. After walking a few feet, her fingertips brushed against his and he bit down on his lip, trying as hard as he could to ignore it. She moved to take his hand in her own, but he gently pulled away and took a step to the side to create a bit of distance between them.

“Do you not want to hold my hand?” she laughed.

“Oh, um,” he started, looking down at his palm before offering it to her. “I do.”

She accepted with a smile, and laced her soft fingers through his. “This is really nice, we should do stuff like this more often.”

“Apple picking is a seasonal thing,” he remarked, trying to deflect.

“That’s not what I meant,” she giggled. “I meant we should go out more in general.”

“Hey, this tree has a lot of apples.” He pulled her toward it, hoping that it would distract her. He dropped her hand and motioned to the tree. “Pick away.”

“Why are you being weird?”

“I’m not.”

She handed him the basket, and reached for an apple that was hanging near her head. “Yeah, you are. Is something bothering you?”

“No,” he lied. She gently placed the apple in the basket before trying to take it back from him. “Only one apple?”

“This place is huge, we don’t have to get all of our apples from this one tree.”

“I’ll carry the basket for you,” he insisted, hoping that it would prevent her from noticing that they weren’t holding hands anymore. It didn’t work.

“Can you hold it in your other hand? Or should I just walk on the other side?”

“I’ll hold it in my other hand.” He transferred the basket and she immediately took his hand again.

They walked for a while, occasionally stopping at trees and picking a few apples before repeating the same routine. When they were approaching the last section of trees before the weighing station, Anna paused.

“Since we’re almost done and there aren’t that many people over here, we should stop for a few pictures now,” she said, dropping his hand and digging through her bag. “If you’re okay with that.”

“Yeah that’s fine.”

She dug out her phone and handed it to him, dropping her purse by his feet and taking a few steps towards the trees. He placed the basket down next to it before opening up the camera app on her phone.

There was no simple way to describe how beautiful she looked as she posed for the camera; between the sunlight that was bouncing off of her hair and the radiant smile that was spread across her face, she was absolutely ethereal. He was so entranced, that he hardly noticed that she was moving toward him and continued snapping pictures until she was much closer than before.

“Can I see how they came out?” she asked, holding her hand out. He placed the phone in her hand and she swiped through them. “They came out great! You’re a pretty good photographer.”

“I guess,” he shrugged.

She slid her phone into her back pocket and then held out her hand again. “Give me your phone, I’ll take a few pictures of you.”

“I don’t need any pictures of myself.”

“You can post it to your Instagram!”

He rolled his eyes. “I’ve only posted to Instagram, like, three times. I hardly use it.”

“It’s never too late. Don’t you want your friends to see what you were up to this weekend?”

“Not really. I don’t have a million friends to impress.”

“I don’t have a million friends and I’m not trying to impress anyone,” she scoffed. “I just think that it would be nice.”

“Which is why I took pictures of you for your Instagram. You don’t have to worry about me.”

She opened her mouth to argue back, but was interrupted when a woman approached them. “Hey, would you mind taking a few pictures of my boyfriend and I?”

“Of course!” Anna answered, accepting the phone from her.

The couple posed and Anna snapped a few photos before handing the phone back.

The woman looked through the pictures. “Thank you so much, they look really good. Do you want me to take a couple for you guys?”

Before he could say no, Anna was handing her phone to the woman. She grabbed his arm and dragged him back a few steps. Before he knew it, she was pressed into his side, her arm wrapped tightly around his lower back. He was unsure what to do with his own arms, and at the last minute, he draped his arm around her shoulders. He was positive that the pictures would perfectly encapsulate the tension he was feeling in his face, but he did his best to smile. After what felt like an eternity, the woman handed the phone back to Anna.

“Thank you so much, I really appreciate it,” she said to the woman, who smiled in return.

“Please don’t put those on the Internet,” he begged once the couple had wandered away.

“Why? You look great,” she said, holding the phone out to him. He took a quick look, and just as he expected, they looked way too couple-y for her to casually post it online.

“Just...don’t.”

“But we look so adorable! I want all of my friends to see it.”

“You’re probably better off just posting the pictures of you alone,” he insisted. “Your friends may get the wrong idea.”

“The wrong idea?”

“You know, they may make assumptions.”

She looked up from her phone, and stared directly into his eyes. “What assumptions do you think they’ll make?”

He didn’t answer, instead choosing to look away from her.

“I need a legitimate reason for not posting this picture,” she insisted. “Tell me, what assumptions do you think my friends will make?”

He hesitated, thinking of how to properly phrase the thoughts running through his mind. “I don’t want people to think we’re a couple when we’re not. It’s weird and embarrassing.”

“We’re not a couple?” she asked incredulously, her eyes nearly popping out of her head.

He was suddenly questioning everything he was certain of a mere moment ago. “Are we?”

“I assumed we were! We’re always together, and you know all of my secrets, and not to be too candid in a public place but we have a physical relationship - oh god, have I been reading this wrong? Are we just friends with benefits? Is that why you didn’t want to hold my hand? Are you, like, embarrassed of me?” She blinked a few times, not taking her eyes off of his.

“No!” he exclaimed loudly, causing a few people to turn around and stare in their direction. Grotesquely aware of the fact that people were paying attention, he continued in a hushed voice, “I didn’t think you’d want to be my girlfriend.”

“Why on earth would you think that?” she squawked, raising a shaky hand to her chest.

He could feel his world crumbling around him. “I’m me and you’re...you. You’re amazing and gorgeous and funny and I’m a boring, grumpy homebody.”

“You’re so much more than that; you’re kind and caring and respectful.”

He took a breath, trying to hold it together. “I don’t think I’m as great as you think I am.”

“I’m in love with you, Kristoff,” she confessed suddenly, the words tumbling out of her mouth with little regard as to how they’d be received. “I wasn’t planning on telling you like this, but you’re the best thing that has ever happened to me and I need you to know that.”

Though the revelation had hit him like a ton of bricks, for the first time ever, he felt at ease with his own feelings. “I love you, too.”

“You do? You aren’t just saying that because I said it?”

“No,” he shook his head. “I mean it. I’ve felt this way for a long time but I’ve been too much of a coward to say anything, too busy convincing myself that you’d be better off with someone else.”

She was in his arms, then, squeezing as tightly as she could, her cheek smashed up against his chest. He wrapped his arms around her and rested his chin atop her head. “You silly, silly boy, we have got to work on this self-deprecating attitude of yours. You almost gave me a heart attack.”

“I’m sorry,” he grimaced, biting down on his lip.

“And for the record, I don’t think that I’d be better off with anyone else.”

He nodded against her instead of answering.

“I would kiss you but people are staring at us,” she said, pulling back slightly so she could look up at him but still keeping her arms firmly around his waist. “We should get out of here.”

“Good idea.”

“Can I please take you out to dinner tonight? I know you don’t -”

The smile on his face was enough for her to stop speaking mid-sentence. “That would be great.”

She heaved a sigh of relief, finally letting go of him so she could grab her purse and the basket. They walked hand-in-hand to the weighing station, where she bagged and paid for the apples they’d picked before walking back to the parking lot.

“Thank you for convincing me to come today, Anna,” he said as they walked to the car. “I’m really glad that I came.”

“I’m really glad that you came, too. And I’m glad that we were able to clear up that misunderstanding.”

“I’m sorry for scaring you like that. I spent a long time convincing myself that there was no possible way that you’d want to be with me, and it became believable.”

“I wouldn’t spend every single day with you if I didn’t want to be with you,” she assured him. “Can I tell you a secret?”

“Sure,” he nodded.

“I’ve lived on our street for my entire life, and tons of people have come and gone, obviously. I can faithfully say that I have only ever welcomed one person to the neighborhood, and that was you.”

“Really? Why?”

She smirked. “I needed an excuse to talk to the cute boy who was moving in next door.”

“Oh,” he chuckled, feeling his cheeks warm up.

“I haven’t stopped bothering you since,” she said, matter-of-factly.

They climbed back into her car, and buckled their seatbelts before she started the ignition.

“And by the way, you should check Instagram,” she remarked, as she started to back out of the spot.

He dug his phone out of his pocket and launched the app. He had a few notifications, but the most recent one led him to a post that he’d been tagged in. Anna had posted the picture of the two of them with the caption: “All the apples in the orchard, and I’d pick him every time.”

He smiled to himself before liking the picture. “Would you mind sending me the pictures we took? I want my friends to see them.”

#kristanna #kristanna fanfic #anna #kristoff bjorgman #frozen #frozen fic #my writing

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akitokihojo · 4 years

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Delicate - Chapter 4

"And who might you be looking for?" Sango questioned suggestively, the smirk on her face implying she'd noticed the several glances Kagome had spared up and down the halls. She'd thought she'd been nonchalant about it, but apparently not.

The question was, of course, rhetorical. Even if it wasn't, she treated it as such. Her best friend would know better than anyone who her eyes constantly searched for considering how habitual it had become. This time, it was a conscious search. She hadn't seen or heard from Inuyasha since Friday night, and her worry was nagging at her. All she wanted was to see that he'd recovered, to see that little smile he'd usually give in passing, and the stress would be satiated. Until then, she played it all off with a spirited shake of her head as she normally would. The last thing she wanted was for her concern to be notable. Out of respect for Inuyasha, Sango was completely unaware of what had occurred that night.

"So, what are you gonna do when you see him?" Her friend asked, walking along at her side.

"Do?"

"Yes, do. You guys have something going here, and it's cute, but you gotta amp it up a little. If not for your sake, then mine. I am living vicariously through you, Kagome! The well is dry!" Sango exclaimed, gesturing to herself overzealously as they stopped several feet before their classroom. "He made a big move last week by scaling your house like freaking Spiderman just to get to your window! People don't do that for fun, alright? This isn't parkour. And, I can assure you he didn't do that for a pin. Ball's in your court, my main gal, and you gotta reciprocate to let him know you're interested."

Kagome was a little taken aback by Sango's passion, the fervor in her brown eyes alight. "Did you have coffee this morning?"

"Yes, what's your point?"

"I can see why your dad doesn't like you drinking it."

"Focus." She grabbed the sides of Kagome's arms to make sure the emphasis was as dramatic as necessary to get her attention, and it took all of Kagome's effort not to sputter out a laugh. "Do you like him?"

"You already know the answer to that!"

"Then do something about it."

"What, exactly, am I supposed to do? Swoon before him so he'll catch me before I hit the ground? He'll just call me an idiot and tell me to get my shit together." As much as she knew that was true, she still found the whole situation humorous, especially the thought of the hypothetical scenario.

"Okay, so you'll just have to make it impossible for him to stop thinking about you. Oh, yes, I've got it!" Sango said, her face beaming as the epiphany hit. She dropped her hold on Kagome, rubbing her hands together in preparation of a scheme. "You know that flirty look you do? Where you have those sultry eyes, and you do that little, crooked grin, and then you look them up and down real quick? Do that! You'll mess him up for the rest of the day!"

"Excuse me, what look!?" Kagome felt the heat rush to her cheeks, her mouth hanging agape.

"Oh, don't play dumb. I've seen you stunt guys. One time, you did it so well, even I felt weak in the knees. I've got no taco cravings, girl, but you fucked me up."

"Sango!"

"Hear me out! The objective, from a woman's standpoint, is to wreck the guy they favor until he just can't take it anymore. I promise you, you do the look and he won't be able to forget it, and then he'll be knocking on your window again in no time. Wreck hi - oh, wreck him." She slyly gestured to Kagome's left, fading her motivational speech off in a low murmur to seem casual.

Subconsciously following Sango's nod, Kagome turned, her dark eyes landing on the half demon as he made his way through the hall in the direction of his own class two doors down. His golden stare met her own, but there was no luminescence behind it. It was dull and lackluster, like he didn't actually see her; she was just part of the crowd. In an attempt to attain his normal reaction toward her, she smiled warmly, never breaking the contact their eyes held. But, he did. He regarded her with such obvious disdain that it jostled her to the core, her grin immediately falling.

As Inuyasha made his way passed and beyond, Kagome's head shifted to follow him, waiting for any sign that he didn't mean it. She was sure it had to have been unintentional. There was no logical explanation for it. Inuyasha was snarky, temperamental, but to her, he wasn't cold. Not even when she frustrated him. He just wasn't. Inuyasha never turned around, though. He said hello to a person in passing and then disappeared into his class.

"What was that all about?" Sango gently inquired. Kagome could only shake her head in answer, signifying that she didn't know. She was racking her brain, trying to figure out what she could have possibly done to deserve it. Maybe he felt embarrassed for oversharing and wanted space. It was easy to understand, especially considering he wasn't much one for opening up. He might have regretted doing so. Humility makes people respond poorly; it was common.

Seeding deeply, Kagome felt a dark shadow of doubt crawl over. That look, the carelessness in his gaze, sent her a message. One she couldn’t decode on the spot. One that brought her to second-guess her initial suspicion. Maybe, for the moment, in the moment, the answer to this wasn’t what was important. She’d respect his chosen time to himself. He’d eventually come around. This was Inuyasha.

By the third day, her stomach was physically aching. It was like he adamantly refused to look at her, and if he did, she was just like any other irrelevant person. She'd given into the temptation and texted him the night before to see if he was alright. That was it. She didn't pry, she didn't bring up Friday or anything he'd told her, or even the way he'd been treating her. Just a simple text saying, "Is everything okay?" It went ignored. The guy even turned his read receipts on to let her know he'd seen it about an hour later. They weren't on before. It was deliberate. She could read the petty memo he was sending perfectly clear.

It hurt. Kagome didn't understand, and her mind was already exhausted from the amount of overthinking that wrung and twisted and carved uncertainty into every corner. What had she done wrong? She had to have done something. That was the only plausible explanation. Even so, how could she apologize? It would be meaningless if she didn't know the causation behind it, and even more so since he refused to talk to her. If she sought him out, it would ring of desperation, and as the glances still held cold or disinterested, the sensations he sent her stabbing and crippling, the rejection was too dense and painful to allow herself anywhere near him. If she did, she would only be willingly subjecting herself to more.

She felt stupid. So, so stupid. There was a part of her that had actually begun to believe he liked her. Even just a little. Yet, here she was feeling disposable; like she hadn't left even an inkling of an indentation on him. Typically, so it goes, if a guy treats you this way it was best to say, "Fuck him," and blow him off just the same. Take a day to handle your feelings, pick yourself up, and move on like a big girl. So, why was her chest feeling so stiflingly congested? Why did it sting so much for him to treat her like nothing when no relationship had ever developed between the two of them? It wasn't just hope that ruined her lucidity, that was a fact she didn't have to convince herself of. Kagome, though a daydreamer, knew the hanyou was distant from the beginning. Despite it all, she thought there was progress. She thought he was growing more comfortable with her. She thought he was learning to trust her. And, the salt in the wound was she didn't even know where she'd gone wrong to mess it all up.

Whenever they'd pass each other, Sango made it a point to distract her. She would either hook her arm in the crook of Kagome's and guide her in a different direction, or abruptly start talking a little louder to effectively regain Kagome's attention. There were very few times she brought up Inuyasha's sudden Jack Frost attitude. It was killing her that her best friend looked so sad all the time and she didn't know what to say or do to help. She feared bringing him up, in general, would only make Kagome's eyes fall to the ground in visible disappointment as she attempted to smile through it. Because, this was Kagome, after all. As hurt as she was, she never tried to show it. By the end of the week, though, Sango was reaching her limit. Something more had to have happened; it didn't make sense that the guy would change his mind out of nowhere. As a spectator to it all, she felt Inuyasha was pretty obvious as his feelings developed for Kagome. The infamous grump of the campus was progressively becoming a big softy for one single person. She wasn't the only one who'd noticed. It wasn't the major gossip filling the halls by any means, but it was pretty clear to those paying attention. How does someone just turn all that off like a light switch? She could be wrong, but she didn't necessarily get player vibes from him either. Something just wasn’t clicking here, and a badgering prickle in the pit of her abdomen continued to annoy Sango to no ends.

Just after school, as they were making their way out, Sango gave Kagome a small tug to the side so that they were out of the way of everyone in the corridor. "Spill. It's been long enough and everything seems to be worse. Am I missing something here?"

"Just about as much as I am." Kagome shrugged. No name needed to be said for her to understand who and what Sango was referencing. They had a pre-spoken agreement that, even prior to all of this, they kept it all hush hush since his hearing was sensitive. The last thing she ever wanted was for him to be tipped off by catching his name from wherever he stood. Especially now. On top of that, no one else needed to know what was going on. "I honestly don't know what changed."

"So, that's it? He literally went from sneaking in through your window in the middle of the night to this? Did something else happen in between? Like, did he make an actual move on you; get a little handsy and take the rejection hard?"

"No. No." Kagome shook her head fervently in reassurance. "He came, he took the pin, he left. He wasn't even there for a full five minutes."

Sango released an airy scoff, completely dumbfounded. "Are you kidding me? That's really it? What a prick.”

"Well,” Kagome hesitated, sighing deeply. Despite the circumstances, she was still reluctant to share Inuyasha's personal information. It played a key role in the scenario, though. It had to. Because, Sango was right, no matter how much it didn't make sense now, it was even more illogical to think he'd go from minor flirting - if that's what they could call it - straight to the cold shoulder. "Okay look, I didn't tell you this because it was kind of a sensitive topic, but I guess it doesn't really matter now. That next night, after Ayumi's thing went down the drain, I ran into him. He was really upset about something, so I made him walk with me a little to calm down and he opened up. That was our actual last encounter."

"You're gonna have to give me a little bit more to work with. What was wrong? Like, something between you two?"

"No, it was more about some family issues." Kagome answered, keeping it bland.

"Okay," Sango nodded, picking up on the hint. "He vented, and then what?"

"I hugged him. Then, I went home."

"Did you maybe say anything that could have possibly insulted him, or made him feel uncomfortable for talking about it all? I mean, from what you've told me, he comes off as fairly guarded. I feel like it'd be easy to tip the scale."

"I didn't say a word." Kagome admitted. "He asked me not to before he even started. He told me everything, and I just - I hugged him. Do you think that was what did it? Maybe the hug made him feel patronized?" The question came out as uncertain as she felt about the idea.

Sango’s face twisted slightly. “What? No. How? Did he, like, push you away?"

"Not immediately. He hugged me back first. And, even as he pushed me, it was really gentle; not in a back off sort of way, but more of a nudge. He told me I should get home since it was late, and it just felt like he was saying he'd calmed down and wanted some space."

"Wow. Yeah, that's gotta be it. I can't believe you tried to comfort him. What a bitch." Sango said with a straight expression, completely sarcastic in her statement.

"If that's not the reason, then I don't know what is." Kagome said, exasperation showing in her tone and flinging hands. "I've gone over it all so many times in my head -"

From down the hall, Sango noticed the familiar smile of Inuyasha's friend, her eyes instinctively traveling to the silver-haired boy walking next to him. Reacting swiftly, she cut off Kagome as smoothly as possible, her tone as friendly as any other conversation they'd had. "You're brother's clumsy, but he’s not dumb. I'm sure he won’t try to go up the stairs while he's home alone."

Though there was initial confusion, Kagome clued in at the suggestive shrug of Sango’s brows, only faltering to pick up the new topic for a moment. “Y-yeah. I - I know, you’re right. He’s just been erring on the bad side of natural selection recently.”

“You worry too much.” Sango giggled.

Kagome watched Sango’s neck stiffen slightly, her eyes flickering over Kagome’s shoulder then towards the closest wall in disregard of the boy about the pass them. There was a slight brush as Inuyasha maneuvered through, his white shirt skimming the sleeve of Kagome’s black cardigan. He’d glanced at Sango but not at her, continuing down the hall.

“Now, that was just mean.” Kagome mumbled. “He did that on purpose.”

“Hey.” Miroku greeted, undetected as he’d stayed behind. His tone was careful as he approached, sympathy etched on his brow. “Sorry about him. He’s been acting pretty strange lately.”

“I don’t know if you two follow any sort of bro code, but can you tell me what I did to make him so mad?”

“I would if I knew. I will tell you something else though, and I’m pretty sure he’d sell my body parts to a meat market if he knew what I was about to say, but what the hell. Life’s about taking risks, right?” He shrugged, his forehead crinkling with how dramatically he’d risen his eyebrows. It was like he was trying to joke, but his apprehension held back the punchline. “Every so often, Inuyasha does this thing where he cuts people out. I really don’t know what happened between the two of you, but I’m pretty sure that’s what he’s doing here.”

“What do you mean?”

“Just as it sounds. He just drops everything and pretends he never knew you. I don’t know why. If it makes you feel any better, I'll admit this time it seems a little different. He’s been more irritable in the last week than I’ve ever witnessed before, and that’s saying something. The guy is your typical Shoujo manga tsundere boy through and through, so attitude from him is like milk in your cereal; it’s a given. But, now he’s so crabby, it’s difficult to even get a basic response to a question from him. I can’t think of anything you could have possibly done to provoke this, Kagome. I’ve known him long enough to know this is internal. If I’m right, which I’m almost sure I am, he doesn’t like letting people get close to him, so I’ve seen this a couple times already. It’s like this routine of self-sabotage, but I’ll be damned if he ever listens to me.”

“If that’s the case, then why hasn’t he cut you out? What makes you so special?” Sango inquired, crossing her arms over her chest in defense. Miroku visibly tensed, a thick swallow bobbing his Adam’s apple. His Indigo eyes seemed to gloss over as he turned to look down the hall, suddenly seeming like an empty shell.

“Could you please not look at me directly?” He awkwardly spoke, voice wavering. “I might have a mental breakdown, and I feel I’ve been doing a really good job at holding an adult conversation.”

The girls eyed each other peculiarly before Sango turned away from him enough that he'd relax. "... Then why hasn't he cut you out? What makes you so special?" She asked again, more monotonously this time.

"Honestly, beats me. The only thing I can think of is he got used to me being around. I'm harmless. But, let's face it, you're not." Miroku suggested, aiming the comment at Kagome. She frowned, brows furrowing in response.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Well, it hasn't been confirmed or anything, but it hasn't been directly denied in a while, either. Whenever I asked, he would just change the subject. Which, to me, translates that the guy was head over heels."

"Wait, wait, wait." Sango interjected, making the mistake of turning to the hanyou's friend. Noticing his immediate discomfort, she then swiveled on her heel to talk to Kagome while her hands spoke in Miroku's direction. "You're telling us that his legitimate response to having feelings for someone is to stop interacting with them!? Isn't that a bit, I don't know, counter productive?"

"Depends on the area he's trying to be productive in, if you think about it. He doesn't like letting people in. Feelings equals closeness."

Sango groaned, "You're contradicting yourself. He has no problem letting you in, yet he cuts everyone else out?”

"He doesn't let me in." Miroku countered smoothly. "I just figured him out. Keep in mind what I said; this time it's different. This time, even he's effected by the distancing."

Kagome ground her jaw, the pout on her face more of aggravation than anything. Things were making more sense, and she was appreciative of the insight, but that didn't mean she saw Inuyasha in any better lighting. In fact, everything was made worse. What a dick move. Just like that, he was done. Because of what? Fear? She could understand the theory, really she could, but it didn't make it right. She hadn’t actually done anything to deserve this. No one did, and he's done this to numerous people. His irritability per their separation didn't make her feel any better, either. Miroku was right. While thinking only of himself, Inuyasha was simultaneously voyaging down a self-destructive path.

Truthfully, she didn't know how to feel. She was still sad, but it was transitioning into something else now. She pitied him, what he'd been through, his turbulent mindset that had him scared to let anyone near. Above all else, for her own sake, she felt angry. Angry that she wasn't even given a chance. Angry that she was treated like she was expendable by the person she’d come to value so much.

Fine. If that was his choice, then fine. There was no point in trying to change his mind, and quite frankly, he didn't deserve her persistency at this point. It would be a nuisance to the both of them.

Miroku gave a careful shrug, a minor cock of his head apologizing as much as words would, backing away and turning around to head out of the emptying hall.

Finally, Sango was able to turn and fully look at him. This wasn't the first time she'd noticed just how broad his shoulders were, how toned his physique seemed, and how nicely his school uniform hugged him. She really enjoyed his smile most of all, and she'd enjoy it a little more if he didn't have a tendency to get super awkward around her - and only her. She tried to take it as flattery, but sometimes it made her overthink that something was wrong with her. They couldn't even have a proper conversation. Other times, it was pretty amusing to watch him instantaneously grow flustered. With the perspective he'd just handed them, though, Sango felt a sense of respect forming for him. He wasn't just a cute, fumbling weirdo. He was kind. It was like he wasn’t afraid to step up when it mattered. He didn't owe Kagome any sort of explanation, yet he willingly gave one without prompt.

"Hey, Miroku?" Sango called. He glanced over his shoulder, blue eyes landing on her. "Thank you. I like your new haircut, by the way. Looks good on you."

His face flashed pink, lips parting slightly as if he were about to respond, but instead of words, the only thing he formulated was an inarticulate groan of some kind.

"You're gonna break him." Kagome stated.

"I know." Sango smiled proudly, the curve on her lips quickly falling away. She could sense that while Kagome feigned amused, the shift in her mood and in her lackluster expression was evident. She was justifiably upset and pulling a typical Kagome by trying to cover it up. Now that they knew the gist of what they were dealing with, Sango felt better equipped to help her handle it all. "So, do you want the straight-forward truth or gentle approach?"

"Both." Kagome sighed.

"You have every right to be upset right now. He hurt you. He's a jerk. But, if that's the way he wants to play, then he can do it alone - just like he wants. He'll realize his mistakes when he’s miserable. You gotta let it go, Kay. He's not worth this." Sango cocked her head sympathetically, rubbing the side of Kagome's arm. "So, you're gonna do what everyone does when they get their heart broken: You're gonna mope, you're gonna eat your weight in ice cream, and then you're gonna take the longest bubble bath of your life and wash him off of you."

"My heart's not broken." Kagome meagerly dismissed, a crooked smile on her face.

"Then why do you look like you're about to cry?"

"Because, we're talking about it." She shook her head, looking at the floor and smiling, as if it would shadow the emotion in her eyes. "It's like asking someone, 'What's wrong?' Even when they're completely fine, they'll still cry."

"Okay, here, I've got a plan! Yuka's birthday shindig is tomorrow." Sango wiggled her shoulders, a positive grin lighting her face. It hurt to see Kagome distraught, to hear the weakness in her voice as she fought back tears. A distraction was obviously necessary right now. "She's having it at that karaoke place on Tustin. I know you hate singing, but you can come and listen to me sing, which you know will be a good time. We'll get all nice and dolled up, look hot, feel good, laugh a little, it'll be fun. Plus, I think Hojo will be there."

"So?" Kagome chuckled, catching her insinuating tone.

"First of all, the guy goes to an all-boy school now so let’s show him some compassion, alright? I'm pretty sure he's jonesing hard for the female specimen since the last time we saw him was months ago. He'll see you, he'll go all goo goo eyed like back in junior high, fall at your feet a little - I mean, if that's not great for the self esteem, I don't know what is." She shrugged. "I think it'll be good for you. Please say you'll go."

Kagome gestured for them to start walking out, her easy expression showing her lack of resolve. "Can I wallow on Sunday?"

"You may. I'll even join you, if you'd like. I could use some wallow time, myself." Sango replied, hooking her arm in Kagome's as she walked at her side.

"Why? What happened to you?"

"Miroku. Miroku happened to me."

—

Kagome and Sango giggled loudly as they made their way down the block, the street lights and storefronts lighting up the semi-populated area in the night. They'd gone to Yuka's birthday party, and she'd invited more people than anticipated, all of them squeezing into the karaoke room - some either having to stand or sit on laps. Sango, of course, sat on Kagome's. It was easy to tell that the blushing boy next to them really wanted to offer a seat, but the only way he could build up enough courage to do anything of the sort was by literally offering his seat over. He was so close at one point to patting on his lap in proposal to Kagome as she came back from the bathroom, Sango could see it written all over Hojo's face. It was amazing to see that even though they went to different schools, and he'd dated around, and Kagome clearly had no interest in him, the boy was still adorably smitten whenever they were around one another. He was more the gentleman type; not very bold, at all. So, watching him try to buck up the confidence necessary to blatantly hit on Kagome in front of everyone was interesting on its own, but Sango just couldn't let it get that far. She lurched forward and grabbed Kagome's hand, dragging her away and into her own lap before Hojo could mutter out a word.

"Be nice!" Kagome gently shoved her friend's arm, trying to swallow her laugh. "He's innocent!"

"I just don't get it! How does he still have it this bad for you? Do you think he's never gotten over the fact that you gave him his first kiss? That's gotta be it!"

"He was mine too, and I've gotten over it!”

“You were never under it. It was a dare.”

“Exactly. He probably doesn't actually have a crush on me, at all! I mean, think about it! It's most likely just harmless flirting."

"Kagome, have you not realized his name is an action among all the people that have ever gone to school with him? Have you never heard that!? Like, when someone is crazy about another but can't articulate that properly, they just fumble over themselves and try to tell them through hints or any other possible way besides outright saying it - like gifting bunion slippers - they're pulling a Hojo. He's got a reputation for a reason." Sango explained.

"Ah, so Miroku's a Hojo around you."

"You take that back!"

"You've got your very own Hojo." Kagome teased.

"Friendship timeout! Thirty seconds!" Sango laughed.

“You’ve got a Hojo!”

"Oh, are we near The Square?" Sango asked, taking in their surroundings. Up ahead, the opening to the area was bright and bustling, orange lights strung from across store tops and posts decorating the environment and building the comfortable ambience for socializing. "I heard they have this really good coffee place! Let's get some!"

"Sango, it's past ten!" Kagome mentioned. "You're dad's gonna kill you if you come home wired."

"He won't be able to tell the difference between a caffeine buzz and the comedown from an outing." She dragged Kagome forward, attempting to scout out the place with her nose. Coffee beans guided her like the force, pulling her through the crowd and straight to the line that connected to the window for blessed java. "Want something?"

"No, thanks." She giggled, amused by Sango's addiction to the one thing her family forbid her to have.

"You're gonna leech off of mine, aren't you?"

"Just a sip." Kagome waited patiently next to her, her eyes drifting over the people hanging out and talking, eating food, drinking coffee, and generally seeming to be having a good time. It was a nice atmosphere, and ages seemed to vary from people her age to maybe early twenties. Feeling watched, she followed the sensation, spotting Inuyasha in a small group he was mingling with, golden eyes glued to her.

Even from the distance, she could determine his furrowed brows and straight-set lips showed he was unhappy, maybe even a little surprised to see her. The feeling was mutual, quite frankly. It’s like there were no safe zones. So, she returned the scowl, giving an exasperated roll of her eyes as she deliberately turned her back to him.

He'd caught her scent in the large-spread crowd, finding that lately he felt he'd be able to pinpoint it anywhere. He tried to ignore it, dismiss it as someone's annoyingly-similar perfume. It was no use. The aroma pulled his focus, bringing his attention to immediately land on the joyful girl. His stomach knotted uncomfortably, hearing her laugh, seeing her smile, noticing how the lights from up above bounced off her skin to glow beautifully. Her hair was in successive waves, not how they usually fell; like, her black locks had been curled only for the strength of the spirals to fall away. Her makeup was nice, intended for a night out, eyes shadowed in blended browns that made the depth of her irises pop dangerously. Her getup was upsettingly appealing, a grey tank top loose on her torso while a tight, black skirt hugged the curves of her hips, topped off with flats and a red, plaid, unbuttoned long sleeve. What a cruel happenstance, salt sprinkling into the wound he'd carved on his own.

Of all places to come dressed like that. He'd told her it wasn't safe just a week ago, yet here she comes waltzing around like a human magnet for unwanted, male attention. Her stare was more brutal than her attire, coldly sneering at him like he'd done to her before. He didn't like it. It tasted acidic, her spite. His fingers began to flex at his side, even as he turned away to refocus on the conversation between Miroku and the other guy they stood with, agitation pressing him with her so near. He'd already noticed a couple of men check her out just as she and Sango appeared, topping the list of shit he wasn't liking at the moment. It was hard not to pay attention to it. It was hard to even pretend not to pay attention to it. The half demon peeked over, his jaw set and blood growing increasingly hotter, chest contracting on his inhale when he witnessed two guys talking to the two girls. Already. Jesus fucking christ, already!

The guys were definitely older, and from their tones that he could just barely pick up over the multitude of conversations happening around, it wasn't a chat they were intending on keeping casual forever. One stepped a little closer, and just like that, Inuyasha was done.

Sango stirred her straw through her blended coffee while the guy closest to Kagome asked if the two of them would like to hang out with their group of friends. "We were just passing through, actually. Thanks, anyway.”

Kagome received the subtle head nod from Sango signifying it was time to go, the two of them flashing friendly smiles to the guys. Before they could make any further move, though, a hot-approaching person caught Kagome’s eye and she turned in time to see Inuyasha marching over, haughtily shoving himself between them and the two boys.

“Let’s go.” He all but growled, amber eyes burning through her.

“What?” The question was sharp on her tongue.

“Come on.” His voice was rough, deep, causing hesitance in her reaction, making Kagome have to force a response while she intentionally twisted her expression in defiance.

“No.”

“Now, Kagome.”

“Look, man, she doesn’t want to go with you.” One of the guys objected.

Inuyasha steadily turned around to face the fucker, the hanyou standing a couple inches higher than him. The idiot was scrawny and human, easily no match for Inuyasha, his short-lived bravery fading away as the half demon stepped closer in a manner to size him up.

“Back the fuck off.” Inuyasha warned.

“We don’t want any trouble. You know her or something?”

Kagome held her breath, never once having seen this side of Inuyasha. He seemed menacing and large, and she swore she heard a threatening growl begin to rumble through his chest.

“Yeah. You?”

“We were kind of in the middle of getting to know them, so -“

“Well, that’s over.” He smiled condescendingly, spinning back to face Kagome. Without a second thought, Inuyasha crouched down, picking Kagome up and tossing her over his shoulder, carrying her off toward the back path they’d found each other on the week prior.

She hadn’t expected it in the least. One minute, Inuyasha was squared up with someone, the next she was being carried off in the world’s most awkward position, a yelp leaving her mouth as her feet left the ground. Kagome’s hands were braced on his mid back, trying to prop herself up so there wasn’t too much weight applied to her stomach against the bony part of his shoulder. His gait provided a little bounce that she swore was never there before, serving to jostle her slightly every few steps or so. Her hair had flung over her head, and with how she was positioned, it was difficult to push it all out of her sight, making it impossible to see the entirety of The Square’s reaction to the scene Inuyasha had just procured - which was probably for the best. No matter how much she told the half demon to put her down, or wriggled in his hold, he never did. Of course, her demands were cut off by multiple, frantic oh my god’s, and her movements were nothing more than baby kicks because she was terrified of being dropped. The guy probably didn’t even take her seriously.

Sango, in wild shock at Inuyasha’s barbaric attitude, hastily went to follow after her helpless friend, strong arms wrapping around her core to stop her mid stride.

“Wait, wait, give him a chance.”

“Give him a - he literally stole Kagome!” She argued, pushing the arms away as she faced Miroku.

“I know, he comes off horribly but I promise he means well!” He defended, the grimace deep on his face. “Just give them a few minutes to try and talk things through.”

“He means well…” Sango scorned, rolling her eyes as she crossed her arms over her chest. “Funny you say that, considering you literally told us yesterday that he ghosts people on the norm.”

“Valid point.” It was hard to argue against that. “You got me there. But, if he really wanted to ditch her, he would have never pulled a stunt like this. No matter the situation.”

“That doesn’t make it okay!”

“You’re right! You’re absolutely right! All I’m asking for is a few minutes. His communication skills are questionable, but he might be coming around. Let’s not interrupt the possibility.”

Reluctantly, Sango huffed, giving in without another word. Miroku knew the guy better than anyone, and his conviction was heartfelt. It was almost impossible to believe that anything bad would happen with how he spoke. It was comforting. So, she’d trust him.

He watched her relax before him, though her arms stayed crossed, her brown eyes washing over him and around the area as she made no further move to follow their friends. All at once, it seemed as if a force had body slammed him, giving him no opportunity to inhale a breath as he took Sango in, his nerves going haywire like every fucking time before. She was gorgeous, mesmerizing, like no other woman he’d ever seen - in person. It was like he physically felt his expression fall into one of peril, his eyes wide as he tried to gather his bearings. She wore a dress, a wonderful, wonderful dress, that hugged her curves like he wanted to. The baby blue complimented her skin tone, her chocolate brown hair straight, and long, and flowing over her shoulders and the front of her body. He stared too long, uncontrollably so, and of course, she noticed, a frown marring her plush lips.

“What’s wrong?”

Oh god, how did he look right now? It took all the effort he had to aim for recovery, focusing on a single objective. It was like he was a young boy learning to flirt all over again, hopeless and awkward and desperate for love. A compliment. He had to compliment her. He had to compliment her.

“Y-you look - wow - um, that’s a - a dress that - no - you’re - you have pretty…” His stammering was worse than ever, tense and forced, his voice monotonous and robotic. He focused on her hair, her eyes, her mouth, her arms, her waist, her hips. “Thighs.”

Sango blinked, lips curling in distaste and confusion, completely taken aback. Was she supposed to thank him? The redness blistering the entirety of his face spoke volumes of how much he hated himself in that moment, his chest so still she wasn’t even sure he was breathing. Thighs. Of all things, he said her thighs were pretty. What was wrong with this guy?

“I could crush you.” She simply stated.

“Yeah. That’s hot.”

And with that, she took her leave, walking the path Inuyasha had carried Kagome away in.

Miroku was ready to cry. He was so close, so close, to an appropriate compliment and he blew it. The worst thing was, he still meant what he’d said. His body washed cold, and he felt empty, light, like he could drift away with the next breeze.

“Dude…” The two guys from before had remained, overhearing it all, equally mortified for him.

“I don’t know why!” Miroku wailed, begrudgingly following after Sango despite his humiliation. At this point, he was more inclined than ever to keep his distance from her.

Inuyasha placed Kagome on her feet, the girl grunting and stumbling backward from his unforgiving lack of gentleness. He caught her arms, stilling her, her hands quickly smacking him away and swinging around to pull her clothes down, desperately trying to ignore the underwear that had ridden up. “Jesus, Inuyasha, you had your hand on my ass that entire time!”

“Yeah, well if you weren’t wearing the world’s shortest skirt, I wouldn’t have had to pin it down to keep it from rising any higher!” The hanyou rebutted.

“You wouldn’t have had to keep it from rising if you didn’t go all ape man and chuck me over your shoulder!”

“If you didn’t say, ‘no,’ I wouldn’t have had to!”

“Oh, so I’m not allowed to not want to talk, but it’s perfectly fine the other way around!? You’ve been ignoring me for a week, Inuyasha, so why the sudden urgency!?”

He shook his head, a crooked grin pushing his cheeks, chuckling to taunt her. Nothing was humorous, he was just being a jerk. And, he was successfully infuriating her.

“No, in order to ignore you that would mean I’d have to care to a certain degree. I don’t. I see you around, I don’t care. I get a text from you, I just don’t care.”

Kagome rolled her eyes, slowly, antagonizingly. Yeah, sure. “Then, what’s so important? I mean, it must be important if you’re willing to break your silence.”

“Fuck it. If I say anything, you’ll just end up moping around for another week like you already have been.” He said, pulling the excuse right out of his ass. He had no good reason for snagging her. He had no good reason for anything. He just couldn’t stand the fucking sight of chummy pricks hitting on Kagome. He acted impulsively. Now, he was going to have to lie impulsively and end this so he could get a fucking grip over himself again. “Go home.”

“No! No! You don’t get to do that!” Kagome yelled, adrenaline heating her entire body and fueling her temper. “Why have you been such a dick to me lately!? Everything seemed fine before!”

“I don’t owe you an explanation!”

“The hell, you don’t! I’m on the receiving end of your crap! I have the right to know why!”

“God, you’re too much! Don’t you get it!? You’re too fucking much!” Inuyasha exclaimed, flailing his hands in exasperation. “I don’t even know how Sango deals with you all the time! You’re ridiculous! You’re so self-righteous, and you’re pushy as fuck! Once I realized you were getting a bit too close to me, I bowed out!”

“What do you mean, too close!?” It was hard to ignore the sting that was making home in her chest, carrying on further because it was too late to stop herself.

“What the hell does it sound like to you!? Think about it, Kagome! I swear, no one could possibly be that bad in school! It’s almost like you were purposely failing tests just to get me to come over!” His first mistake: eye contact while she took the hit. It was like some light faded from her rich irises. Still, like a train out of control, Inuyasha continued. “You give me your two cents as if your opinions are supposed to matter! You touch me, hug me! Geez, you like me and it's so fucking obvious!”

Hurt her pride, and she’ll leave. That was the plan. Whenever you throw out sensitive accusations like this, true or false as they may be, the natural reaction to the humility was to object, redirect the shame, and then walk away. He’d seen it so many fucking times, it was like clockwork.

The saliva she swallowed tasted bitter, a gelatinous denseness overfilling her stomach. He’d looked away, radiant eyes gazing at whatever he could except her. She hadn’t fully thought out a response. At this point, it was hard to form rational thoughts anymore, her voice coming from her lips of its own accord. Because, silence would only make him think he’d won. “I-I fail to see what’s wrong with that!”

Kagome had always compared the golden hues to that of embers, but as his eyes snapped back to her, the befuddlement, the surprise at her statement shifted the color to deepen, resembling the heat of an actual fire. Anger didn’t back up the change, as one would expect. In fact, she could physically feel his rage temporarily subside in the wake of this.

“I mean, really! What’s wrong with that!? So I liked you, big deal! Sorry it was inconvenient, but I never once tried for anything more, or ever expected you to reciprocate, so don’t act like I was next-level clingy and desperate for your attention! Because, I wasn’t and you know it! Why do you look so surprised right now, Inuyasha? Where’s your vicious reply? I mean, with the look you’re giving me, it’s almost like you had no idea I really did have feelings for you, which would only discredit your argument and -“ Her jaw dropped a little at her own realization. “You didn't, did you? What, were you just throwing out bullshit to try and make me look bad? To embarrass me!? What - what is that, a defense mechanism of yours?”

“Oh, fuck this.” Inuyasha blurted, the words tight in his throat. He turned around, beginning to walk away, the lining of his stomach burning while his chest twinged painfully. His fingers trembled, and he clenched them into fists, his breathing erratic. Mistake number two: allowing his nerves to get the better of him at her admittance. He didn’t know. She called him on everything, but he was so thrown by the reality that she really did care for him. “You’ve got it all wrong, but think whatever you want.”

“I don’t think I do! You’re not this mysterious book no one’s ever been able to open, you know!? I’m sure you wish you were, but you’re a bit too expressive for your own good! What’s this really about, Inuyasha!?”

“Shut up!” He barked, aiming it over his shoulder.

“Are you afraid of something!?”

He kept walking, the sigh he let out rigid and flaming, especially as he noticed Sango and Miroku watching from afar. He heard Kagome’s vexing laugh from behind, and it was like he'd walked full force into a wall, enclosed in a space with the bitch and having no other choice but to turn around and accept her challenge.

“That’s it. I can’t believe I didn’t figure this out sooner.” Kagome said, astounded.

“What the fuck are you going on about!?” His face was red, furious, marching back over to her to continue on like he’d never tried to leave.

“It wasn’t just that I was getting close to you! You were getting close to me too, and it freaked you out!”

“Nothing scares me!”

“Bullshit! I scare you! You’re just not willing to admit it! It’s easier for you to blame me and play the big shot! You felt something for me, and that something wasn’t going away, and it terrified you! Because opening yourself up to someone means opening yourself up to someone potentially leaving! Right? But you, being who you are, always walk around with a pack of matches in one hand and a container of gasoline in the other just so you can burn your side of the bridge before the other person has the chance to burn theirs!”

“God, Kagome, shut up! You don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about!”

“Considering how upset you are, I think I’m pretty freaking close!”

“Why can’t you just let it go!?”

“I will when you own up! I’m right, aren’t I!? You’re the only one hurting you, Inuyasha!”

“If that’s the case, then why the fuck do you care so much!?”

“Why would you question that!?” Kagome flailed her arms, dumbstruck, her voice breaking from the unbridled emotion burning her throat. “If someone is willing to care, even after all of this, shouldn’t that be something you’re grateful for!? God, you think the entire world is out to get you, you’re willing to hand out blame like lottery tickets! Believe it or not, not everything will turn out as bad as you think it will! You just refuse to give anything or anyone a fucking chance! You’re so busy preventing anything from happening that you literally prevent anything from happening!”

They stood just inches apart, staring at each other with fury and outright condemnation. Their chests rose and fell heavily, hot breath filling the small space between them. His scowl uncreased, his features softening as it seemed he steadily regained control of himself. Inuyasha leaned closer, his eyes glossed over, causing Kagome’s breathing to sputter and hitch in her chest. His voice was low, gruff. Venomous.

“You’re a waste of time.”

Everything inside her went cold. She wasn’t angry anymore, a dull blade silencing her temper. It was like she suddenly felt unsteady, the sensation starting calm and growing to a wobble, making Kagome feel as if she were swaying no matter how still her feet actually were. The argument wasn’t the waste of time, it was her. She was the waste of time. And, he wanted her to taste the poison in his sentiment. The only thing he could have said that would have been more painful than this was that he hated her. She could only guess that was next on his tongue. Brown eyes drifted to his chest and the black shirt that covered it, down to his stomach that seemed to blur with the sting of tears she was trying to fight off, down to his dark jeans as her face contorted slightly before she resumed control, then to the tiny spaces of the cement that separated their shoes.

Mistake number three: hurting her so badly, he'd hurt himself.

He lost control. He lost sight of the purpose of everything. The words just came out of his mouth, he didn’t mean them. Everything he’d said to her up until this point was mean and distasteful, but this was unmatched. He crossed a line; immediately, he knew it. Kagome didn’t deserve this. She was good. Kagome was good. And, she was right about everything. Inuyasha could hear his blood pumping in his ears, feel his heart thumping aggressively. The quiver in her chin halted his breathing, and the salt he suddenly smelled tasted like his acrid punishment. Frozen, he just listened to her unsteady breathing as her composure visibly wavered, dragging him lower and lower. He shouldn’t have said it, but it was too late. There was nothing he could do now.

“Okay. I’m sorry.” Kagome whispered, her voice not cooperating. There was nothing in her that could convincer her to look directly at him. If she did, she’d fold. She began to back away, creating distance, her body shaky and light. The damage was done. She wished she'd never pushed him for answers. Sometimes it was better to be ignorant. It was hard to swallow that someone, Inuyasha, thought so little of her. All she wanted now was to go home. She just wanted to go home, get away from him, stay away from him for good.

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#Inuyasha #kagome #kagome higurashi #miroku #sango #mirsan #inukag #inuyasha fanfiction #inuyasha fanfic #inuyasha fic #inukag fanfiction #inukag fanfic #inukag fic #high school au #coming of age #my writing #akitokihojo #delicate

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dear--charlie · 3 years

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Dear Charlie,

every time I remember you, I regret not writing to you more often. So, here I am again. There are so many things on my mind ... but as I am typing, I know one thing I can start with, or more like dedicate this whole letter to. I think it's a good time to write everything down here and now – to you. It’s personal, I hope no one I know ever find this, the chances are zero, but even if, it doesn’t matter anyways. So, it will be a long letter, you’re warned!

It started in fall, one and a half years ago, when I was at a friends place. She had invited some friends over to hang out in the evening. Another friend of a friend was also coming, he wasn’t there yet and I didn’t know him, just his name from stories. So we were sitting in the room, playing something as he also arrives. The moment he entered the room, I knew. Normally I don’t „sense“ the energy someone brings or something like that, but in this moment, I just felt I would like him. I felt we would get along. And I wasn’t wrong.

We all continued to play and chat, I didn’t talk to him directly that evening, just within the group. One time someone said something and he responded, the answer he gave, the words he chose and how he pronounced them were exactly what I was thinking and how I would’ve responded myself. There is this quote I read some months ago, it’s about how with so many people on this planet, it’s no coincidence that others are thinking the same, but it’s still a fucking wonder to meet someone who says what you are thinking. But I didn’t know this quote back then, I just sat there and felt it’s immensity. The next really weird thing, well, one of the thirst things I noticed probably, he looked and spoke just like him. With him I mean the one (and to this day still the only) person I was „lovestroke“ for. Really, if you could see them both, you wouldn’t believe it either. With the difference, that he was not only cuter, but also the fact that he was in that room and friends with my friends, what meant that we two might actually have things in common. Kind of unreal! For a moment I also thought: How come y’all never introduced us? Isn’t it obvious we are alike, or might be? How could we know our friends for years but our paths never crossed? Of course everyone only has their lives on mind, but this just crossed my mind in an egocentric flash. Well on this evening, we all didn’t stay long. When I walked home I checked to find his social media, but his account was private and I didn’t send a request. Shortly after when I came home I got a notification and saw that he followed me.

After that night – nothing really happened. Not nothing, we sometimes texted a bit. We skipped smalltalk, just talked about music and stuff, but like I said, not much. Once he told some personal things. Nothing more. There were a lot of other things going on in my life and it just got less.

Many weeks later when I hung out with two of the friends who also know him, they mentioned his name, then looked meaningful at each other. When I looked confused, one friend told me the two of them hooked up, but it was clear she wasn’t positive about it or him. She didn’t elaborate and I didn’t ask because I didn’t want to come across interested.

Let’s fast forward several months. It was summer and our mutual friend asked me if I’d be down to go swimming the next day. I said yes and got to hers in the morning and she suddenly said we’ll drive to his and pick him up because he’ll be coming as well. I literally went „!“ inside. So we got there and picked him up. Everything was normal, we met other friends and went swimming. Before that I wasn’t sure how it will be, if I’d still get this feeling, or do I just like him friendship-wise? But this afternoon let no doubt. It was a crush. We talked a bit and also I recognised that he looked at me sometimes. I was sure I wasn’t just imagining.

A month later a big group of friends went on holidays together for a week, including me and him. One night when just the two of us were outside and talking I regretted everything later in bed because I thought I messed it up by not talking much and when saying the wrong things and so on. But then, one night, he slept in my room and we finally hooked up. Also the next day in the bathroom. On our way home we also cuddled in the car and when we said goodbye we said we’ll see each other. Usually, after a week with many people I’d want to chill, but I immediately had the urge to see him again the moment I sat down on my bed. We texted and set up a date a few days later. I couldn’t wait.

We met and went on a hill to watch the sunset. We made out and walked around. It never felt so right for me to hold someones hand publicly. I also told him I would leave for a while, in a month. Before we said goodbye, we talked. I was kind of an idiot because I overshared, and lowkey told him I like him, which I regretted later. When I walked home that night I remember smiling like a dumbass. When I thought about him, I had to smile. Never had I thought that this can be true, that you just have to smile and can’t fight it. So weird. Felt like I was micro dosing molly for a week straight.

Anyways. Then the trouble began. Nothing big in the beginning, but it was very hard to set up dates with him in general and when we were about to meet again he cancelled right before. It wasn’t like when you make plans with someone and they then can’t make it and you’re fine with it, because I was actually sad about it. Also it felt more like it was due to his mismanaged time and that it wasn’t as much as a priority for him. When I saw him in person I felt like he reciprocated everything, which I also never experienced like this. So I was confused. Then I straight up texted if he wants to see me again, or not really? Something that I would have never done that quickly anytime before, but I didn’t want to get my hopes up and was running out of time before I was leaving. He replied that I got it wrong, he really wants to see me again.

And we saw each other again. I went to his place. There was a bit of a fog over it in the beginning, but i eventually passed and we hooked up. I slept there. The next day, he brought me to the train. I think we even kissed as goodbye. He said he would like to do this again, I replied I’d love to. This was the last time I saw him for about a year.

I texted the next days for new plans, nothing came out of it. So I decided to wait for him to ask the next time. I waited 7 days. I almost went mad. It was his birthday in between and I decided not to text him, would’ve been weird. I texted a friend, who's also friends with him and asked if I could meet her. We met and I told her pretty much the whole story. She listened the whole time and asked things in between. Then she said she knows the reason he didn’t reach out. He has another girl and is really in love. I started crying in the middle of the street.

He would have never told me, called, texted or just anything. I was hurt by that. My friend said she would talk to him and hint that he should tell me. And he actually texted me a few days later if I would want to meet „to talk“. I agreed. When he finally responded he postponed the meet up again. I couldn't wait another several days for a conversation that he might reschedule again. It was clearly not important to him at all. I said we should just drop it. That’s was it. No final talk.

Months later, when I was back in town, I saw him on Bumble. I asked my friend about it, but she said it’s weird since she still has his girlfriend. Then I see him on Tinder with an up to date profile. In my mind-delusion I assumed they might actually not date anymore and my friend just doesn’t know yet. Then I saw him again for the first time since everything at a party. He talked to me normally, like nothing happened. Some days later I ask friends why he is on Tinder when he still has a girlfriend. For some reason a part of me expected to hear „oh yeah they broke up“, but no, they told me they both are on there to meet „friends“. I let my illusions go and tried to accept everything as it was.

The funny thing is, I started the draft to this story some days ago. Wanted to write it down to be finished with it and let it go once and for all. Since then I found out they broke up. But this doesn’t mean anything now. I accepted that there will be nothing serious between us, or, at least, I am on the best way to it. I will see him again, because of our mutual friends. So we’ll see how I will do.

I just rarely had such a vibe with someone and it's hard to let that go, you know? Meeting someone you could actually fit together with, someone you feel like you can be authentically yourself in front of at some point, ... it basically never happens. It would have been easier to let it go if he would have been honest and told me in a last talk. Of course, in the beginning I would have been sad as well, but eventually, there is less potential to obsess when it feels finished. And doing the correct thing is what stays, I'm not just saying that, you know I really do appreciate it. Still don't know if I should be angry or just forgive by myself, without ever bringing it up again.

That’s all about this story for now.

I really hope you are good.

Love,

#dear charlie #ZL

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theantagonistsbliss · 4 years

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My 2020 thus far..... in terms of girls.

November 15th, 2020

I’d like to start of by summarizing the amount of girls that have been a part of my life this year and have decided to up and leave for one reason or another.

Robyn C - I was casually seeing her from work. It wasn’t anything serious, but it was fun for the time being. I assumed we were going to continue seeing each other until she had to move to Vancouver for school; that was one of the appealing parts of the “relationship” because it would have an inevitable end not because of either of us but because of physical distance being placed....that ended early because she slowly stopped talking to me and started seeing someone else without letting me know. Dope. Found that one out through my roommate who knew for weeks. Stung a bit.

Sydney P - Aaaah yes this one. I simped for this girl really hard. Definitely not worth it though. This is the girlfriend that cheated on me the previous year. We didn’t talk for 6 months after that happened. Until I was an idiot and wanted to catch up and see how she was doing . Gave her a call and chatted for a while. We started texting again. I made it clear though that I didn’t want to hangout, because when we broke up I made it public that I caught her cheating, so it would also look bad on me if we were seen together again...because it was. Eventually I caved and we hungout in person...also one unfortunate night downtown at the clubs before lockdown, a very drunk me, her, and her friend ended up at her place and did some regrettable (But mostly awesome) things. Definitely shouldn’t have, but that night is burned into my memory now. Anyways, we were friendly for some time after that, even open about other people that we potentially wanted to start seeing or dating, and it was fine temporarily. Until she started seeing this guy that sounded awful, from her perspective not just mine. I sucked it up until she was drinking with him one night near my house and sent me DIRECTLY multiple snaps of them together kissing and what not, the day after I told her that I needed to take a step back from our friendship because I still had feelings for her. Huuuuuge mistake on my part for trying to keep her around and give her another chance. I clearly thought I saw something in her that wasn’t there, and she wanted me around as a friend. Which honestly I understand, I am a GREAT friend. Most of my good friends are female because of how open I am with them and how comfortable I am talking about my feelings. She felt that too, and wanted me to stay that way. But It would have been disingenuous to myself to ignore the feelings that I still had that she clearly didn’t. And after telling her that we CAN’T be friends anymore for those reasons, she disagreed and said I was “running away from the issue”. Which I’m going to chalk up to her wishful thinking, as she would assume me swallowing those feelings would have been better? I don’t know. All I know is that she is still with this dude and I shouldn’t have anything to do with her anymore. She wasn’t THE reason, but she was definitely a solid variable for me to leave Kelowna as I felt the need to physically distance myself from that kind of one sided toxic friendship.

Katie B - Didn’t actually date her or anything this year, but she was my friend. And in my world where I was miserable and felt the need to move back home to save money during my last year of school because of the Corona Virus Pandemic, I thought it would be comforting to have a friend that I still messaged regularly to be waiting for me when I got home. But surprise surprise, we hangout one time and it felt...off. She was seeing some guy that hit one her when we were seeing each other, but to my knowledge it still wasn’t anything serious. BUT, she eventually told me that she was intentionally distancing herself from me to respect her now BOYFRIEND...when wee months before she was still sending me pictures of her ass while they were “dating”. To some point I can respect her decision but holy fuck does that timing suck for me. Thinking that I will have a friend in this tough time of isolation where there are few people I actually want to see in my home town. Jokes on me though, #BadLuckBrian

Abby M - for clarification, I never dated this girl. Not one time. Thank God for that though. We simply just messaged each other for years, talking fairly regularly. Because we never lived in the same city for the majority of our friendship we seemed to overshare a lot and be a lot more open with each other, since it was seemingly risk free. So EVENTUALLY, since I had to move back home we got to hangout...like one time. And previously we both said we had a bit of a crush on the other. We would not hangout again for weeks, maybe months, though I have had a lot of free time, same as her seeing as she lost her job and was making mediocre money from her mediocre only fans...Not the best romantic candidate haha, whoops. Anyways, I kept asking to hangout and eventually she said “no can do, I have a boyfriend”, which would be fine...if she didn’t lead me on for months. She said things like “Well I kept calling you my best friend, I put you in the friend zone”, buuuut simultaneously would send me nudes on the regular. Strange girl, strange thing. I called her out for leading me on and how that’s not okay and she simply just said I was simping for her haha. Sorry girl, I would NOT pay for your OF. Strange “Friendship” indeed. Truthfully I do miss some of the talks that we had when I wasn’t in the same city as her. When there was no real reason for us to be anything more than pen pals to each other. I think I learned something from this one.

Makayla M - This one is the freshest. Scene, I’m still living in Kelowna. I match with her on Tinder, she seems like a cool girl. She wants to meet up for a drink. I tell her yes but I don’t want to waste her time and that I’m moving back home for approximately 5 months. She says that is unfortunate but still wants to meet because she thinks I'm a cool guy as well, at least over text/snap. We have a drink and hangout, its great, she’s great, we really get along. Nothing happens though, no kisses or anything, we both just go home. A few days later we hangout again, this time doing the “Netflix and Chill” thing. We have sex, its great, its fun, I don’t regret it. I leave in a couple days, on the night before I leave I’m having drinks with my roommates, end up going to her house instead of finding my way home, we have sex again. Still great. She's great. I leave the next morning. We ended up talking everyday for the next 4 months. I thought to myself “damn, she might actually still be into me by the time I get back!”. Which maybe was naïve of me. A few days after I told her that I found a new place and roommate in Kelowna and can actually come back she goes...quiet...We were talking pretty much everyday before this, so it was weird that she was being a lot more quiet than usual. It was like that for about a week. I was worried, maybe something had actually happened to her? I was about to straight up ask her roommate if something had happened to her of if I was just being ghosted. After about a week of that I messaged her asking if she was okay, suggesting maybe that she started seeing someone? She didn’t respond for another 2 days, but when she did she said “Hi! Sorry, I’ve been super busy with work. And yeah I’ve kind of started seeing someone”. Which for one, she works at a liquor store, not sure how busy she could be but oh well, and second ouch my heart. She definitely didn’t owe me anything, since we only really hungout 3 times, but I absolutely developed feelings for this girl over the 4 months of us talking everyday. We would send each other lude snaps, and cute messages about how we wish the other person was within reach so we could cuddle and give each other smooches & do cute things for the other. I was in it man, I really wanted this to be a possibility when I inevitably moved back. And then, once I am only 1 month from moving back she starts seeing someone else. I am immensely disappointed. Again, we didn’t owe anything to each other, but God I was into giving her more than she deserved. All I said to her when she sent that was “oh yeah I kind of figured, well good luck with that”. That was the last thing I said to her after months of sending cute nothings to one another. Disappointing is how I would describe that potential relationship. Right now I really want to message her, and let her know how much this upsets me that I can’t message her everyday like before anymore, and I know she will say “we can still talk and be friends!” but dammit I don’t want to be her friend. I want more than that. And I will not do what a younger version of me would do; say “Yeah I’d like that” and suffer silently when said person would get the benefit of having me as a great friend while I would be struggling to keep my composure around them. I’m still not sure if I should keep her on socials. I think it is still too fresh to think clearly about it.

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waitimcomingtoo · 5 years

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In Case You Don’t Live Forever - Chapter Three

Pairing: Peter Parker X Venom!reader

Warnings: none

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Masterlist

Peter arrived at the Avengers tower with a little pep in his step. His new neighbor was on his mind and he couldn’t get her off. He had somehow managed not to completely blow it with her. He knew it was a long shot, after all they’d only had one conversation, but he felt like there was a connection between them. She was awkward, he was awkward. What more does a relationship need?

Tony was quick to notice the change in Peters mood. A dreamy smile crept across his face every now and then while Tony was trying to explain something about his nanotechnology.

“Alright Underoos, whats on your mind? A girl? Boy? That gorgeous Aunt of yours? Oh wait no, that’s what’s on my mind.” Tony smirked. A blush painted Peters cheeks.

“Nothing sir. Sorry, I’ll pay attention.” Peter answered quickly. Tony scanned Peter up and down.

“So its a girl. Alright. Who is she?” Tony asked, motioning for Peter to sit down with him. Peters heart skipped a beat at the opportunity to talk about the girl he was so badly crushing on.

“This girl moved in across the hall from me about a week ago. I’d see her on the stairs sometimes, or in the lobby. She’s beautiful, Mr. Stark. I mean, really beautiful. And I know girls are a lot more than their appearance, trust me, but I can never look away. It’s like God made a perfect batch of cookie dough, and then made a perfect cookie cutter, and then hand made her just for me. There’s just, there’s something about her, man. I feel like I’ve always known her, and I don’t even know her yet. She knocked on my door this morning and I nearly had a heart attack when I saw her through the peephole. I played dumb and acted like I didn’t know she lived across the hall.” Peter started to explain. A twinge of embarrassment struck him at the memory of what he said to Y/N.

“Oh God. You said something stupid, didn’t you?” Tony inquired, noticing the look of embarrassment on Peters face as he recalled their conversation. Tony leaned on his hands like a child. This stuff excited him more than anything.

“I insulted her dead father and called him smelly.” Peter admitted. Tony laughed.

“But she found it funny and agreed with me.” Peter quickly followed up. Tony looked impressed.

“Wow. Normally I’d say there’s no coming back from that, but she seems like a keeper. So, are you gonna throw on your Spidey suit and take her for a ride around the city? Works with all the ladies.” Tony wiggled eyebrows. Peter shook his head.

“No. Spider-Man isn’t a party trick or some tactic to pick up girls. Plus, I want her to like me for me. That’s why I invited her over for dinner tonight.” Peter answered. Tony looked down at his hands, not wanting Peter to see how proud he was. He couldn’t let Peter get too cocky.

“That was a test and you passed. Alright, spider child, you have my blessing. But no funny business tonight. If I find out I’m gonna have to design nanotech baby clothes, I’m gonna be pissed.” Tony said. Peter blushed at the mere thought of what Tony was implying. He spent the rest of his time at the tower going over missions and training.

I arrived at Peters at 6:07. I was done getting ready at 5:45, and sat in the living room on my phone until I was slightly late. I didn’t want to be early, like some loser. Or even worse, on time. I had to be fashionably, but not rudely, late.

I knocked on Peters door and waited. The door swung open instantly, as if he’d be waiting. I couldn’t help but chuckle at the thought of him waiting for me. Peter must’ve read my mind. He turned red, must be a habit of his, and smiled.

“I know what you’re thinking. I’ll let you decide if I was waiting at the door for you or if I’m just really fast. “ Peter said, breaking the ice. At least, he tried to. And kudos to him for trying. But I was drawing a blank on my part. I had no idea what to say. I was a reporter for crying out loud. I don’t get tripped up on my words. But something about Peter Parker and that damn collared shirt rendered me unable to formulate a thought. All I could do was stand there and smile at him, like a Jackass. I felt like I was standing weirdly and I all the sudden had no idea where to put my hands. Do I leave them at my sides? That felt too stiff and soldier-like. But where else would they go? I was pretty sure every brain cell had left my body at that point.

“You look nice.” Peter blurted, interrupting the awkward silence that had settled between us. Even he seemed surprised by his statement. I looked as nice as a lazy person who didn’t fully unpack their clothes could look. I had on a casual grey dress that was made of some sort of t-shirt material. It was bunched in the front and hugged my figure nicely. My hair was in a loose bun with a few curls framing my face. Peter took in my appearance with what looked like approval. Then I noticed Peters gaze falling to my feet.

“Converse with a dress. Nice.” He commented. I felt my personality re-enter my body, finally.

“Oh yeah. You know me. Quirky and cool and not like other girls.” I said sarcastically and attempted to flip my hair, but my dumbass forgot it was in a bun. I still made the hand motion and Peter seemed to get what I was going for. He laughed. I felt myself relax at the magical sound.

“You look nice too. Very…Freddie Benson.” I said. Freddie Benson? Who the hell makes an ICarly reference to compliment someone? This night was going downhill fast and I regretted ever knocking on his door.

“Dude. You’re tanking.” Venom said. I had to agree. This couldn’t be going worse.

But lo and behold, Peters beautiful laugh filled my ears once again.

“That’s what I was going for! My friend Ned always teases me for wearing sweaters and button downs but he just doesn’t have the vision.” Peter said. We smiled at each other. Maybe this night wasn’t gonna be so bad after all. He suddenly stepped aside and gestured inward.

“Come in. Dinners almost ready.”

Peters apartment looked just like mine, but much more homey. I saw his baby pictures on the wall, coupled with pictures of him and his parents through the years. Then I noticed a framed picture of a different couple on the coffee table. They resembled Peter but I didn’t see them in any photos with him past the age of around 7. There was a candle next to the frame. I quickly looked away, not wanting to overstep.

“You must be Y/N. It’s very nice to meet you.” I heard a woman’s voice. I turned around and saw a young woman in high pants and a yellow tank top. I recognized her from the pictures with Peter.

“I am. It’s very nice to meet you too Mrs. Parker.” I said politely and shook her hand. She smiled at me and fixed her glasses.

“Please. Call me May.” She said.

“May.” I repeated. Hm. If this was Aunt May, where were Peters parents?

Peter and I sat down while May finished preparing dinner. I offered to help, being the polite ass bitch that I am, but May insisted I sat down and waited. A plate of “meatloaf” was placed in front of me soon enough. I use the term “meatloaf” very loosely. It looked more like an old shriveled brain. Peter made eye contact with me and winked.

“It’s not as bad as it looks.” He whispered. I nodded and gave him a small smile. He glanced at May, who was busy pouring the drinks, before leaning in closer and whispering “it’s way worse.”

I kicked Peter under the table and he giggled, quickly masking the sound with a drink of water. It’s a shame. I love that sound.

“So, Y/N, where do you go to school?” May asked. I took a bite of meatloaf, nearly died, and swallowed before answering.

“I’m actually taking a gap year before I start at NYU in the fall.” I said. May nodded in approval.

“That’s a very good school. I hadn’t realized you were in college.” She said.

“Y/N used to live in San Francisco.” Peter quipped. He smiled at me , proud of himself for remembering. May looked impressed.

“Yea. I grew up here in Queens and moved to San Francisco to live with my fiancée last year. But I just moved back last week.” I said. Peter began choking on his water. May shot him a look.

“Peter. Manners.” She said sternly. He wipes his mouth after catching his breath.

“Fiancée?” Was all he managed to say between coughs and sputters. Oh great. Time for this conversation.

“Ex-fiancée. He broke off the engagement after I got him fired from his internship at a law firm.” I said sheepishly. I overshared, just a tad. Peter and May didn’t seem put off by it though. Peter looked relieved more than anything.

“May I ask how you got him fired?” May asked.

“Well, I’m an investigative reporter, and my boyfriend Andy was studying to become a lawyer. Andy had some information pertaining to a case on the man who owned the Life Foundation. I was supposed to interview him about his rocket but he was a terrible, terrible guy, and I knew it. I looked at Andy’s classified files to find out more about him and found some things I wasn’t supposed to. I confronted him about it in our interview and he ended up getting me and Andy fired in one day.” I recalled. It seemed like so long ago. I felt a coldness run through my bones at the memory. Mays eyes widened.

“I knew your name sounded familiar when Peter told me you moved in across the hall. You were the one that took Carlton Drake down, right?” She asked. I merely nodded. I hadn’t heard his name in months. It still sent shivers down my spine. You don’t forget a man who stabbed you after trying to kidnap you and take you to an alien planet.

“Didn’t he die in his own rocket?” Peter asked.

“Yea. I was there. Me and…my friend.” I said, almost mentioning Venom.

“Gosh I read that story forever ago. It was all over the news here. I remember Peter ranting to me that this young girl was straight out of high school and already taking down shady guys in San Francisco. You were obsessed with the article, remember Peter? I’m pretty sure you hung it up. “ May recalled. Peter, you guessed it, turned bright red.

“I just thought you were cool. Taking down bad guys and all at such a young age. It really inspired me.” Peter explained. He suddenly looked panicked, like he said too much. I blushed at his compliment.

“Thank you Peter. How old are you anyway?” I asked.

“17. I’ll be 18 on August 10th.” He said proudly. “What about you?” He asked.

“He’s legal.” Venom whispered. I couldn’t even be mad at her. I was thinking the same thing.

“I’m 19.” I said. A smile crept across his face.

“And this fiancée, where is he now?” May asked. May wasn’t blind to what was happening between her nephew and this new neighbor. She could sense his crush and knew he was dying to know more.

“I would very much also like to know that.” Peter said, almost robotically. He leaned in closer and stared at me while he awaited my answer.

“He’s engaged again. Not to me this time though. They’re getting married this summer.” I said. It was the first time I said those words out loud. I didn’t feel sad, like I thought I would. I didn’t know how I felt. The smile that broke out on Peters face gave a clear indication on how he felt though.

“That’s great. I mean, not great great. Great for him, I mean. It’s always good to move on. Wether it be with an old friend or a brand new one. Maybe it’s with someone you just met. You never know. Things just happen between the most random of people. Could be a stranger. Or, or, hear me out, it could be less of a stranger. Like a barista, or a mailman or a…a neighbor.” Peter said. The last part came out very quietly. I almost didn’t hear him. He looked up at me slowly. “I’m sorry that things didn’t work out though. Between you and him, I mean. ” Peter said honestly. I smiled at him.

“Thanks. It was tough at first but, I’m okay now. He wasn’t the one.” I said. And I meant it too. May smiled.

“When you do find the one, you’ll know. Your heart will whisper ‘it’s you, it’s always been you. You’re the one I’ve been looking for.’ At least, that’s what my heart said when I met Ben. I just knew he was the one for me.” May said with a happy smile. I could see her eyes glistened behind her glasses. I did something rather bold. I put my hand on top of hers and squeezed. She gave off this loving motherly vibe that I had only read about in stories and seen in movies but never felt for myself. May gave me the warmest smile and squeezed my hand back.

“That’s lovely May. Although, I always thought when you met the one, your heart wouldn’t say that it’s been looking for that person. I always thought it would say ‘welcome home’, or something like that. You know? Like, you’ve always known them. I don’t know though. Maybe I’ve just seen The Princess Bride one too many times.” I shrugged. May laughed.

“Ah. That’s a classic in this household. Peter would refuse to go to bed without watching it.” May recalled. Peter didn’t turn red this time. He only rolled his eyes.

“Because it’s a cinematic masterpiece. You’re trying to embarrass me by pointing out that even as a child I had impeccable taste? Oh please.” Peter sassed his Aunt. I laughed at his remark. May noticed the smile that broke out on Peters face when he succeeded in making their new neighbor laugh.

May looked at me for a while with a content smile on her face before saying “Yeah. I suppose you do have good taste.”

Tag List 🏷

@monimiin @truthdaze @honeyccoated @constellationswithapurpose @condy-wants-a-cookie @zipp0flare @vxidnik @maddie-laufeyson

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unravelling-the-world · 4 years

Text

ok before i lose my mind the thoughts on this weeks episode bc i am dumb and need to overshare on this site.

ok first of all i loved the brothers and totoko interacting it made me so happy to see them just being like without being creeps or any shit like that i love that kind of interactions between them so i feel like :-) and i just loved them all working together too like idk just seeing otouto + kara without bullying kara feels so refreshing haha idk yeah i liked them working together and all that i just ToT

secondly unpopular but i felt kinda bad for choromatsu like damn he mustve felt like absolute shit man poor guy im glad he got closure and peace at the end though. srsly good for him

osomatsu. oh boy. i mean his fear of commitment is relatable but i feel so bad for him though. and same for nyaachan tbh i just felt bad for them i hope they could resolve their struggles but i know they wont bc this is a gag anime but this ep was a gem T-T

oh also i loved seeing osomatsu just hanging at chibita´s like ik he´s done it before when there´s trouble but it kind of makes me happy? like he can go there alone ocasionally if he´s troubled and chibita´s there to listen he´s such a great guy i love chibita im a chibita fan sorry he´s just so good idk. and god i also love the friendship between osomatsu and totoko like he´s ocasionally such a creep and shit but i love when in serious moments totoko always seems to be there for him and idk i feel like he trusts her bc this has already happened before and i just really like the relationship theyre shown to have in those moments i also love how everyone just wanted to protect nyaachan it was kinda cute like they did it just for the sake of helping her idk thats cute....

and the ending ik it was just for him to die but i liked how he just feel deeper and deeper bc its a recurring theme in artworks where the character is very sad or depressed and they just draw them drowning like drowning in sadness and such. i liked it.

also im just kind of AAAAA bc i know its easier and its like up to interpreation but still with context like we dont know exactly what osomatsu totoko and chibita talked abt the night before we can infer the context bc of the situation but we dont know what exactly went thru osomatsu´s mind and ajslhfdkjasdjka i just wish we could know T-T and we also dont know what went thru nyaa-chan´s bc she seemed so excited until the morning so what went through her head that morning, why did she regret her decision, i mean obviously shes scared but what exactly went thru her mind is a mystery and as much as i love to not know things for sure i also wish we could but it wouldnt be nearly as cool if we did bc i love theorizing and shit. yeah

#sorry this is so long can yall tell i love serious episodes? but yeah i did say i was an edgelord #hinatalks #osomatsu san spoilers

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vandeaad · 5 years

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The eyes of a clown. Chapter 5.

A/N: Sorry that this is a little short. And mabye not the best one. But i tried and i got motivated. I hope its alright!

Summary: Does something very dumb. And Arthur gets a suprise.

Warnings: Prison? Swearing.

Rosie's pov:

Rosie stayed over at Jonathan and Ben's place. All three of them drank a lot last night. The boys were very kind and understanding and let Rosie speak her mind. She still could not believe that the joker was her father. The whole situation was So surreal.

Rosie sat on the couch. She didn't sleep at all last night. She just couldn't. She had way to much on her mind. Rosie sighed as she sat up more straight in the sofa. She could hear the birds twitter in the early hour. It was otherwise quiet, almost no cars outside.

The boys where still asleep in their bed. Rosie could hear one of them snoring. She looked around the place, empty bottles of wine and empty beer cans.

Shit...that was a night. Fuck. I have probably overshared way to much. Rosie said quietly to herself.

The sunshine shined a light in the living room, settling on the flowers that they had. Rosie smiled a little. Such a small thing could make anyone smile.

The next thing she knew, Jonathan walked in the living room only wearing his underwear. He looked extremely tired and hungover, as to be expected.

Good morning Jon. Rosie said, giving Jonathan a welcoming smile.

Not that good, but morning love. Jonathan said, putting a cigarette in his mouth and lighting it. Slowly walking over to the cough to sit next to Rosie.

How did you sleep? He said, taking a deep drag from his cigarette.

I didn't sleep...too much shit on my mind. Rosie said.

Yeah... Jonathan said. He picked up his cigarette package and took one out, offering it to Rosie.

Rosie took the cigarette. She really didn't smoke too often but did when things got hard. Like this time.

She lit the cigarette, taking a soft drag from it and relaxing onto the cough.

So...before me and Ben went to sleep, we talked. Jonathan began.

About what? Rosie said, emotionless in her voice. Taking another drag from the cigarette.

Jonathan didn’t say anything yet, he took another long drag from his cigarette. Leaning forward on the couch.

About your situation. The dad situation. He said.

Rosie didn't freeze this time.

What about him, Jon? Its what it is. Is there even anything to talk about anymore? Rosie said, she sounded sad and emotionless.

Have you ever thought of...meeting him? In Arkham? Jonathan said, Rosie could see on his face that he immediately regretted his question.

I haven’t...yet. I'm still kind of processing the whole thing. She said.

Silence.

Rosie began talking after the silence.

Ever since I saw his picture and found out what I am to him...I just. See my own eyes in his own. Or maybe it's his eyes in mine? Rosie rambles. Jonathan looked at Rosie, giving her a kind smile.

I'm here for you. I know we haven’t known each other that long, but you're my best friend in this town and i love you. Jonathan said.

Rosie looked back at Jonathan, smiling and sitting up more straight on the sofa.

I love you too, man. You're the best. She said

Jonathan grinned, trying to light the mood up.

So for real though, have you? Ever thought of maybe visiting him? Jonathan said.

Maybe. I mean...I am intrigued. But he might be too dangerous. Rosie said.

Perhaps. But i mean...he’s still your, i mean. He took a drag from his cigarette and blew out the smoke in a sigh.

Yeah, why the fuck not. Let’s go today. Rosie blurted out shrugging her shoulders.

It would seem as she had lost her marbles.

Oh uh. Are you sure love? I mean I don't want you to rush into anything. You might want to do some resea-... Jonathan said before Rosie cut him of.

No, seriously. Let's go today. Lets take a fuckn bus to Arkham. Let's go before Ben wakes up. She said.

Jonathan put his cigarette out, giving Rosie a shocked expression.

Wh-...now?! Before my coffee? I meant more like in the afternoon. He said.

Yeah why the fuck not? Go get dressed and let's go. I want to do this before i change my mind. Rosie said.

Jonathan looked distraught, but gave Rosie a nod and quietly walked in the bedroom to put clothes on.

Rosie sat on the couch for a second or two after he closed the bedroom door. She put her cigarette out and slowly walked to the hallway to put her shoes and coat on. She caught a glimpse of herself in the hallway mirror, she looked horrible. Makeup from the night before smudged under her eyes. She shrugged it off.

So what? She said quietly

A minute later, Jonathan walked out the bedroom with clothes on. He nodded to Rosie and they walked out the apartment together.

The two of them stood outside of the bus station. Rosie stood with her arms folded and back hunched.

What was she doing? Is she doing a big mistake? Why was she doing this? To find answers? To find cl-... Jonathan cut her thoughts off.

the bus will arrive in like 10 minutes. Do you want time to yourself or do you need your best pal to comfort you? Jonathan said, smiling.

Rosie shakes her head. Jonathan understood and let her be until the bus arrived.

On the bus

Rosie was quiet almost for the whole ride...and so was Jonathan. Rosie could see the people of Gotham starting to wake up. Seeing more people on the streets and more cars.

She sighed and Jonathan gave her a comforting look. He wrapped his arms around her.

Its okay. I'll be there. He said quietly to her.

Bus stops.

Next stop. Arkham hospital.

Jokers pov:

it was early in the morning. Arthur had not slept as per usual. The white rooms fluorescent light never went out. The only thing that made Arthur sure about if it was day or night was by the window.

Arthur walked slowly across the room, back and forth. Trying to make the day go by.

He was humming on that's life while doing so. It was still one of his favorite tunes.

It was nice that at least in his cell he could be free from those damn shackles. He could move freely. The shackles hurt and were uncomfortable. Arthur looked down at his wrists to see bruising.

Oh well. Arthur said softly.

Time goes on. Arthur didn’t really know how long it had been but the sun had gone up a little as he could see.

He was still walking back and forth, occasionally doing a little dance. Arthur still loved dancing, it made him smile. He did a little twirl while he giggled and smiled.

Not too long after that. His cell door banged.

Arthur looked up, surprised . It wasn’t breakfast yet. And it certainly wasn't time for common area, he had already been out there for the week.

The little door in the big door opened, a big tall guard stood there with his eyes peering inside Arthur's cell.

Fleck, I see you're up. You have a visitor. The guard said with his deep voice.

Arthur stopped dancing and burrowed his eyebrows. A visitor? For ME? He said.

If it's one of those godamn reporters again I swear. Arthur said. Mildly annoyed.

Not a reporter. The gal says she's family. The guard said.

Arthur was even more baffled.

i don’t have a family. He said, sounding mad and gave the guard a cold smile with ‘’dead eyes’’

well you don’t have a choice, come on. Hands on your back, legs separated. The guard said sternly.

Arthur let out a sighed growl. But did what the guard said. There was no doubt that he was curious.

The guard opened the cell door and put on Arthur's handcuffs first. Then going his way down to Arthur's ankles.

Arthur hated the shackles with a burning hatred.

Come on fleck. Let's go. The guard said, pushing hard on Arthur's back, forcing him to move.

The two of them walked down the hallway. Arthur had his face down.

Can you really not tell me who it is, sir? Arthur asked the guard, looking up and smiling as nicely as he could.

The guard was quiet.

Arthur's face became a frown, the guard noticed.

Head down, freak. He said.

Arthur obliged, he could feel the hate building up. But he kept on walking.

The guard stopped Arthur. Arthur looked up to see a door with a visitors sign over it.

The door opened.

The room was dirty and it smelled like old feet. There were a glass wall with telephones hanging by them. As well as chairs on either side.

The other side of the room was empty...or so he thought.

Arthur's stare froze when he saw his own eyes looking back at him.

This can't be. He said out loud in a soft voice. The hatred that had been building up just a few minutes before had disappeared.

To be continued...

Taglist: @elusive-ivory @help-i-am-obssessed @pcrushinnerd If you wish to be tagged, please leave a comment saying that you want to be tagged and you will be added. Cheers.

#Joker #Joaquin Phoenix #Arthur fleck #OC:Rosie Grey #Arthur fleck x daughter!#arthur fleck x reader #2019joker #Clown dad #The eyes of a clown #Joker fanfiction

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oscarswildetiger · 5 years

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I’m just taking a break from an unfuck your habit cleaning spree to complain.

I signed up for Noom shortly after my 30th birthday because I felt like absolute crap about myself. I didn’t want to do any trend diets, I haven’t done that for years, and the whole 30 was a lot more dedication than I really wanted as well. Noom promised something different and well so far it has been. I’m not going to get into Noom too much, but I just wanted to lay the basis that is what I’ve been doing and since when (Last week of November to mid Jan) According to the scale today I’ve lost a total of 21 lbs, but I’m so frustrated. The scale goes up and down. Noom has you weigh yourself every day, and I think the point of that is to see exactly how your weight fluxates, in the beginning I was shedding lbs pretty evenly, then the scale would tick up, I would go 3 days without pooping, then I’d poop and it would be back down. Then my digestive schedule evened out and I would see still a cycle of upticks then downward, then a few days at the same, then up, then down, you get the picture. Yesterday morning I weighed 6 lbs more than I did this morning. I think the scale will say I’ve gained 3 tomorrow, so it’s a victory but also one that feels rather fleeting.

I’ve been exercising a lot more, running on treadmill, I even started derby! But thats a post for another time (though we’ll touch back on this a bit more shortly) my clothes fit better, I’m feeling better, but I’m just fucking annoyed.

My job is so boring that I realize I spent a lot of time eating snacks there because I had so much downtime. Now that I’m not eating so many snacks I’m frustrated at how slow the clock goes between the time I get to work and the time I get to lunch and then again the time that means I can go home. So I sit at work trying to keep myself busy and I’m just annoyed at all the things that I COULD be doing at home and that I can’t do because I’m stuck HERE at a job that doesn’t give me enough work to fill 7.5 hours worth of my day. It feels like a punishment having to wake up, drive 45 minutes to a place where I have to sit in a quiet room and can’t do anything that makes me feel productive. Not to mention my coworker (whom I don’t even like, and I know doesn’t care for me) tells me REALLY personal health information that I would never want to know about anyone, and that no one outside her doctor, husband, and maybe best friend should ever know about (Kidney stones, UTIs, and Yeast Infections OH MY!) I know more about my coworkers scheduled cervix exams than anyone outside an OBGYN’s office should know. Honestly is this a form of sexual harassment? Your coworker oversharing information about their genitals that you never asked or showed any interest in? It’s a form of something thats for sure, and it’s sure as hell not appropriate. Then I come home and either go for a run first or just go straight to spend time making dinner, this is mostly okay, I enjoy cooking and baking so trying new things is nice, sometimes it’s annoying when it doesn’t come together but c’est la vie. But then I’m done cooking and eating and then I’m not sure what to do. I’m tired at this point but I’ve eaten enough food and I’ve been on my feet enough. Counting calories (and types of calories) often leaves little to no room for any alcohol. I used to love a glass of wine with dinner and then usually another glass or two after the fact, and maybe a snack. But now I’m realizing that these things helped me relax and unwind, just like eating snacks throughout the day, eating and drinking after dinner was like part of a ritual, and now I’m stuck without that. Sometimes I drink an herbal tea or a hot chocolate, but its just less satisfying. I came home today early from work because I have a hectic weekend schedule and need to do this deep cleaning that I am currently procrastinating on. I’ve already gotten so much done and I’m glad I took the time off, but like, I also want to make a cocktail and have a pizza right now like it’s no ones business and I simply cannot do that right now. 1. I do have derby practice tonight so I couldn’t drink right now or eat something heavy if I wanted to, and 2. I don’ have that kind of stuff in the house so I’m not going out to sabotage myself. I also know if I chowed down on a whole pizza (a feat that would be a piece of cake a few months ago) I’d feel like ultimate garbage and probably give up cleaning entirely and just lay down and zone out to netflix. This thought is comforting because I know I’m getting more shit done and not eating something that I’ll regret later. Roller Derby gives me a lot of anxiety, I was never the best player but I was excited to be back, but I’m scared to go tonight because I’m feeling frustrated and just want to stay home. My thoughts are telling me that I’m going to suck at laps and that I’m going to make an idiot out of myself tonight because I’m already feeling like a big useless baby anyway from not having anything to do at work all week, but I know I will be self defeated if I don’t go. I’m hoping that by going I’m able to get some of this frustration out (it’s contact tonight so time to hit people!) and I can transfer the negative energy that I’m feeling into some positive endorphin fueled brain matter. I don’t really have a point for any of this, other than my frustrations are at an all time high this week and I have no way to get it out of my system because my previous habits weren’t entirely healthy and I’m not sure how to channel them in a healthy way so now it’s effecting me in all aspects of life and I’m not feeling very healthy at all. It’s just a vicious cycle I’m in right now and I’m fucking fed up.

#weight loss #frustration #work

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necropsittacus · 5 years

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for the ask thing, all the ones you have an interesting answer for

this is extremely long because I Love Oversharing so under a cut. thanks britta!!!

4: how do you take your coffee/tea?tea, black; i've tried putting extra spices in it but i think i'm not doing it right bc it gets grainy and weird? i don't drink coffee anymore for "hey maybe we should stop consuming this thing that makes us feel like we're actually about to die" reasons but when i did it was with a fuckton of cream5. are you self-conscious of your smile?yeah; less so since i actually brush my teeth semi routinely now, so they're less awful, but i still have a slight overbite and a residual habit of covering my mouth with my hand if i open it very much 8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings?either weird vent fanfiction that i never end up finishing, drawing in my notebooks, or i try to make the overly dramatic/pretentious thoughts that pop into my head into poetry (which i never end up finishing, go figure).9: do you like singing/humming to yourself?used to, but it's like. even besides insecurity about my voice and the fear that i'll be Too Loud and bother someone. the same internal barrier that makes it hard to speak out loud, especially if i'm not directly prompted to, applies to singing10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach?usually side, and in the fetal position. occasionally back though13: what’s something that made you smile today?saw a chickadee!14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like?god i don't know that's like. that's the fucking dream, for the future, but i hadn't gotten as far as daydreaming about *decoration* or anything of that sort. at the moment i tend towards covering things in movie posters and little trinkets i accumulate and toys and that sort of thing. i know i couldn't do sharing a room with someone else long term, it'd get stressy, so at least two bedrooms (or a bedroom and a pull out couch in the living room, that'd work), a little kitchen. no minimalism, but i might like having primary responsibility for Housecleaning sorts of things for my loved ones, or keeping things reasonably neat. just. something that feels like a proper home. safe. 16: what’s your favorite pasta dish?i am extremely boring and usually just do fettuccine alfredo. that said, cheese ravioli and pesto products are also very good. i just don't like super complicated foods with ingredients i don't recognize, or red sauce. red sauce is Sensory Bad. 17: what color do you really want to dye your hair?i mean i've been dyeing mine black since i was like 17 to the point that people think that's the natural color and i just let them, and honestly i'm very happy with thatred looked good on me, and i definitely like the way a lot of those super bright unnatural purples, blues, etc look on other people but it doesn't feel like "yes this is Correct this is what i'm Supposed to Look Like, this is the color it was *supposed* to be all along" in the same way, it just feels like i'm dyeing it a weird color for fun18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up."mola mola isn't a slur, right?"20: what’s your favorite eye color?idk about "favorite" but dark brown eyes are really pretty22: are you a morning person?i tend to be more productive and (assuming at least like five or six hours of sleep) more cheerful in the morning, but getting out of bed is a horrible struggle bc executive dysfunction and anxiety23: what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations?tbh i HATE having those days, i don't like being super busy Either but i get really like bored/restless/I Am Going to Rip My Skin Off to Have Something to Do Please Let Me Out of the House if i genuinely don't have anything scheduled for a day? so i usually *make* obligations for myself, writing projects or something like that, if i don't have anything externally enforced. and go to the library or a cafe or something bc i feel more alive if i don't stay in my room all day24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets?yeah26: what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit?i mean i've only had them for like a year bc it turns out that wearing the same pair of shoes almost every day wears through them pretty fast, who would have thought? but black combat boots28: sunrise or sunset?sunset31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks.they hurt but i p much only wear boots so i have to wear them all the time. also my feet are weird and fucked up and i don’t especially like looking at them. and then i forget to take them off to sleep so i just. wear them all the time except to shower. i like weird socks with like animal pictures or whatever but then i feel bad abt wearing them bc i wear out socks really fast for unclear reasons34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it?ooh i had a lot!! most of them were sea mammals, a couple sharks i think? i had a couple rabbits when i was Really small but i don't remember them as clearlyi can't remember most of their names but they had whole like imagined stories and relationships to each other and shit, i definitely remember there was one stuffed orca that was almost as big as kindergartener me35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often?oh absolutely!! i write mostly in pencil for ease of corrections and so it doesn't bleed through the paper, but i accumulate pens/weird ink colors/etc37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean?see i *prefer* having my room be clean but it literally never is 39: what color do you wear the most?black. combination of "trying to be low effort goth" and that idk how to coordinate colors so all my outfits are either all black or like. black + one other color + possibly grey, bc i figure there's no way that could end up clashing horribly. also i only HAVE black pants anyway so like. 41: what’s the last book you remember really, really loving?mm i know accident by christa wolf hit me pretty hard in some emotions, and that was recent44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything?i'm not sure that's an emotion i have tbhwhen i'm happy there's this kind of anxious edge to it, not necessarily in a bad way, but "at peace" is. an odd concept for me. the closest i get is this sort of quiet not-exactly-negative melancholy if i'm not behind on anything and it's raining and everything's just sort of soft yknow? 47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe?marinara sauce. i hate that shit. i'll eat it on pizza or if i literally have to in order to get a meal and i can't physically handle not having one, but that's about it. also tomatoes more generally! i like ketchup but that's it. why do yall insist on putting tomatoes on everything all the time i Don't Like Them50: what’s an odd thing you collect?i keep all the toys i get out of kinder eggs and stuff like that. also i just have hyperempathy about inanimate objects and animals (and basically no empathy for humans most of the time, weirdly enough) and it's frequently difficult for me to throw things away because "well i'll be hurting it!" so uh. i just accumulate objects. i still have my old toothbrush somewhere55: what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point?i straight up tried to kill myself to win an argument with mom once in high school. and i'm not talking like a mini fakeout attempt that wasn't supposed/expected to work, either, i did regret it but i was straight up prepared to die to get her to believe me 56: what are some things you find endearing in people?rambling/talking about your interests, emotional openness. if you like. send me things that reminded you of me/you thought i'd like, or initiate physical contact so i don't have to feel so weird/guilty about it, that's a very fast path to my affections. just being weird as shit. lots of little things, really. depends on the person a lot, though; either "person is Soft and Good and i feel like it's my responsibility to protect them" or "person is Kind of Scary/Edgy and i will attach myself to them and remain loyal no matter what and they appreciate it" are pretty consistent things, but those are a long way from the Only paths to my affection58: who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why?awfully bold of you to assume i have a friend group and not just a disparate group of friends who mostly don't talk to each other. i AM semi consistently the weird vodka uncle though. 59: what’s your favorite myth?LOTS. that's not quite a fair question i can't pick one favoritethe volsunga saga does come to mind, though60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves?i do!!! i thought i didn't because turns out the things they make you read in high school english are often Not Terribly Emotionally Resonant for me, funnily enough, but when i started reading russian poetry in college, and more mental illness focused stuff tbh, it was like Oh Shit This Is Really Cool. i really like vladimir mayakovsky!61: what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received?when i was really small i gave my dad a care bears coloring book for his birthday because for some reason i didn't process that other people didn't have exactly the same interests as me??62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind?i drink either unsweetened green tea or monster energy drinks in the morning. depends how much of a disaster i'm being on that particular day. 63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be?all my music is online or haphazardly downloaded to my phone so there's. not really any way to organize that if i wanted to tbh. i make a lot of character or ship playlists that i'd put more effort into organizing if i ever got around to showing them to other people, but Also anything that isn't too embarrassing to risk anyone else seeing just gets put in one folder. i DO organize my books, though. i usually *forget* to put them back where they're supposed to go, but there is a proper order (everything from one author or franchise together, stuff like star wars or tolkien is together and in in-universe chronological order, stuff like that), and i get upset if people fuck with it67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel?nice. it's very calming, and also bright sunlight hurts my eyes fjgshtf68: what’s winter like where you live?not very different from fall most of the time. climate change is making it more midwest-y, which i'm not sure if i'm happy about or not (snow nice, but summer is also progressing in that direction, which is unfortunate). somewhere between the 30's and 50's (fahrenheit), mostly pretty grey, it rains sometimes. it's not cold enough that i need to have a real coat, usually sweater+leather jacket is enough. my hands always hurt, though70: have you ever used a ouija board?yeah i used to do it with my brother sometimes. nothing ever happened tho76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t?i need to write my paper proposal for nuclear lit and also draw some stuff for people that i've been putting off because my brain hates me and Catching Up On Everything I Should Have Been Doing a While Ago Is Scary77: pink or yellow lemonade?both? both is good78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub?i have no real feelings on minions one way or the other but i have no interest in them and don't like seeing them all the time79: what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you?someone i used to know was going to move away from their abusers and get a job and such, partly or mostly For Me, so we could run away and start things over together after i graduated. and then things blew up but. it was very sweet and sometimes i get emotional about the concept of that still 80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why?three white, one blue. i didn't choose it, it came with the dorm room. my bedroom in my parents house has really dark blue walls, which i DID choose bc i wanted a dark color and my brother already had red ones and i wanted to distinguish myself from him. 82: are/were you good in school?mmm more or less, yes i'm terrible at certain kinds of projects and at getting stuff done without pretty much devastating my physical ability to function pushing myself at the last minute. that said, i'm very good at tests, good at papers, good at language learning and bullshit analysis. it's just like. PLEASE don't give me "fun creative projects!!!" or start with the "oh well tests aren't a good way of measuring learning, here's some other stuff that will be easier for you!" thing. i *like* tests. tests make sense and it's just sit down for an hour and you're done. it's the other stuff that's hard also i'm so used to my mother's ridiculous standards that it's like. yes i am good at school, in that my professors keep telling me i am Very Smart and things of that nature. but also i am terrible at taking care of myself while i have school because me being good at school is to some extent reliant on my brain's false insistence that Everybody Else Has Perfect Grades and Is Killing Themselves Slowly To Be The Best, so clearly we need to do that too! and any sacrifice is worth it! so eventually i just collapse84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones?yeah definitely, at some point. there's other things that are more pressing to spend my limited amount of non-parent-controlled money on right now, but i know i want like. some manner of thing referencing my chronic turin turambar (self dx) status, probably his grave inscription or a sword (or both eventually!). probably also a bird of some sort85: do you read comics? what are your faves?see i'll happily read comics if there's a franchise i'm already interested in that has comics as part of it, but i'm not like a Comics Fan per se. i tend to find them kind of overwhelming because there's just So Much content and i don't know where to start and i usually get distracted before i finish. i did really enjoy mtmte and the tdc creation myths comics89: are you close to your parents?nope! i send my dad animal pictures, and vice versa, and that's about the extent of it when i'm not staying with them for breaks. mom's...Difficult(TM) and dad i get along with fine but i don't really know how to text him 92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch?drowns. i want to be able to actually taste it.93: what’s the hairstyle you wear the most?my hair is too short to really have Different Styles. i just keep it combed pretty neatly bc that's the only thing i know how to do afngjdsgf94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday?my friend emma @autisticsansamaybe people i care less about had them more recently but tbh if we aren't friends i don't know when your birthday is without being told96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot?i have literally never updated this laptop because it does not have space for an update. this isn't even my fault. i have deleted *every single thing on it that is not important to make it actually run* in order to have enough space to update, and it STILL doesn't. 100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why?a few months ago i would have said 5 years into the past, because i Desperately missed aspects of how my life was at that part of high school--mostly having people i loved and who loved me, who wanted a future with me, and the certainty of that, that i wouldn't just be On My Own Forever post educational system--but now? future. high school fucking *sucked* in a lot of ways, and also i was a terrible person and i don't especially want to go back to that version of me. future is like...scary because yeah there is a decent possibility i'll just be pretty much totally alone and having to work a job i hate to keep up, but like. there is also a possibility that i'll have the things i wanted all along in a more stable context, yknow?

#suicide ment /#alcohol ment /#ask memes #long post #very long post ajhnfgsf im so sorry

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babblingblondegenius · 6 years

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Future Ficlet: All You Need is Love...and Coffee

Wow, tonight’s episode was brutal. Between the painful Olicity separation in present time and the lack of Olicity in the dark future of the flash-forwards, we aren’t seeing any of the happy right now. There seems to be no hope. Our heroes’ sacrifices were all in vain. Basically, everything sucks.

As kismet would have it, a couple of weeks ago, I shared a fun little head canon with @allimariexf and @hope-for-olicity and they both encouraged me to ‘write the thing.’ I’ve had a terrible case of writer’s block for quite some time (meaning I have a gazillion story ideas and a ton of WIPs that are unfinished). I expected this one to end up dormant in my drafts as well. But after tonight’s episode, I felt the need to finish it because we (and Olicity, of course) deserve a little hope and happy. Set two years in the future, the premise of this little fluffy ficlet is that Felicity needs an assistant but she has particular criteria ;)

This should have been the easy part.

After months of enticing investors, obtaining the proper licenses and permits, all the legal mumbo jumbo, and locating the perfect office space, hiring an executive assistant is going to be the breaking point where she finally loses her sanity.

Which completely defeats the purpose of trying to find someone to help her in the first place.

She has been doing fine on her own, thriving actually, since she decided it was time to recommence building a tech company from the ground up, sans Curtis this time. This venture, for better or worse, will be all hers. Her vision. Her name. Her legacy.

Despite her initial apprehension at that thought, she has a clarity and confidence in her mission and goals that has propelled her forward at a pace she couldn’t have imagined. So far, choosing which of her many prototypes she wanted to launch first has been her biggest challenge.

Until now.

She had narrowed down the stack of over 100 applications to the eight most qualified for the position, and began the interview process at 7:00 this morning.

The first one had been punctual, neat, and lacking any sort of personality whatsoever.

The second one arrived twenty minutes late and then interrupted Felicity mid-interview to take a non-emergency personal call on her cell phone.

The third one tapped her super long artificial nails on the edge of Felicity’s desk the entire time and included ‘loud typer’ when asked how her current co-workers would describe her.

The fourth one was a chaotic whirlwind who overshared details of his personal life on every single question.

Maybe he just had too much caffeine in his system. Or maybe she doesn’t have enough.

Coffee. She needs coffee. Her next interviewee isn’t scheduled to come in for another hour, so she takes the reprieve to just lay her head down on her desk for a moment in order to gather up the energy she needs to make the trek down the block for her caffeine fix.

“One vanilla soy latte, extra sugar, extra cinnamon, extra whip cream.”

Oh yes. That’s exactly what she wants. Why she is thinking it in Oliver’s voice, she doesn’t know. Her coffee daydream is so vivid, she can even smell the soothing notes of vanilla with hints of sweet cinnamon spice wafting through the air. Mmmmmmmm.

“Felicity….honey, are you okay?” Oliver’s voice again. She slowly lifts her head and sees her husband standing on the other side of her desk, holding a large cup emblazoned with the logo of her favorite java joint and her name scrawled across it in black marker.

“I am now,” she practically purrs as he hands over her treasured treat. After taking a deep inhale and a long swallow, she blissfully smiles at him. “It’s perfect. You’re perfect.” Suddenly jumping up out of her chair, she shares the revelation brought on by the jolt of caffeine in her system. “Oh! I have a great idea! You should apply to be my EA.”

Oliver chuffs out a laugh. “Because I brought you coffee? Your standards must be pretty low.”

“Worried you couldn’t cut it, Mr. Queen?” she asks, arching an eyebrow in challenge.

“I think my time served as Mayor proves otherwise,” he retorts with an air of gravitas but mimics her gesture, silently letting her know that he enjoys her teasing him and is willing to play along.

She shakes her head. “Nope, not helpful. You couldn’t even get me a break on my taxes when you were the mayor. What are your current qualifications?”

He ponders the inquiry for a moment before responding proudly, “I’m the head chef at Chez Queen.”

She rolls her eyes at Oliver’s corny moniker for their kitchen but gives him an encouraging smile. “Oh yeah, I’ve eaten there a few times. The food is magnificent. But do you have any business experience?”

His expression goes from proud to smug. “As a matter of fact, I do. I was formerly the CEO of Queen Consolidated.”

She takes another swig of coffee and checks an incoming text on her cell phone before reminding him, “I happen to have first-hand knowledge you wouldn’t have made it a week without your super smart and highly efficient EA.”

“That’s true,” he concedes with a grin, “though on the downside, she only brought me coffee one time. One”, he repeats, taking her coffee and phone and setting them off to the side. Placing his palms flat on the edge of her desk, he leans in closer, a visible twinkle in his vivid blue eyes. “I think she actually broke our coffeemaker. Violently,” he teases in a conspiratorial whisper.

Mirroring her husband, she leans in over the desk until their noses are almost touching. “A little violence doesn’t scare you, does it, Mr. Queen?” She allows her gaze to run down the length of his torso, visibly appreciating the definition of his biceps that his jacket cannot conceal. “You look like you could handle yourself just fine.”

“I like to stay in shape.” He feigns modesty but she knows her husband and can recognize that look in his eyes. “Some cardio, free weights, martial arts, salmon ladder…”

“That’s so hot” she blurts out, temporarily slipping out of character as her brain produces an amazing visual of sweaty and shirtless Oliver making his way up the salmon ladder. Will there ever be a day when that doesn’t turn her on? Probably not, and judging from the self-satisfied smirk on his face, he mentioned it on purpose just to get that very reaction out of her. Determined to get back on track, she rephrases, “I mean, that sounds interesting.” She decides a change of topic would be helpful to give her an advantage in their little game. “Computer skills?”

She immediately regrets that question when Oliver gives her a feral smile that makes her weak in the knees. Lowering his voice to the same octave he uses when he is dressed in green leather, he divulges, “I’ve hacked a federal prison network.”

Guh, game over. In all her years with Oliver, that is the sexiest thing he has ever said. She quickly makes her way around the desk and invades his personal space. “Seems like you’re a man of many talents,” she coos appreciatively, latching onto his arm and nuzzling her face into the sleeve of his jacket to breathe in the scent that is uniquely Oliver.

“My wife taught me a thing or two,” he boasts, turning so they are face-to-face and he can wrap his arms around her.

Her hands instinctively move from his arm to his chest, resting over his heart. “She must be an amazing woman.”

Oliver nods in agreement, his nose nuzzling hers. “She is. She’s the best.”

“I know you’re just saying that to get husband points and its working,” she acknowledges affectionately, her hand caressing the stubble on his jaw. He tilts his head into her palm like a contented cat and she takes the opportunity to kiss him like she wanted to since she saw him in front of her desk, whether it was five minutes ago with coffee or nine years ago with a bullet-ridden laptop.

Oliver moans and deepens the kiss, the fervent strokes of his tongue making her long for more. “Okay, you’re hired,” she pants, breaking the kiss when her need for air temporarily overcomes her need for Oliver. “Smoak Tech is a start-up so your health care package consists of me patching you up if you are injured and I’m sure we can work out some type of compensation for your time and skills,” provocatively shifting her body against his and feeling his obvious interest through his jeans and her skirt. Two soft kisses and one firm rotation of his hips later, she is internally debating the sturdiness of her desk and whether they have time for her to show him exactly what she means by ‘compensation’ before her next appointment shows up.

“That’s a very tempting offer, Ms. Smoak” he murmurs into her hair as his hand travels down her back and immediately finds its usual place on the curve of her shapely ass, pulling her impossibly closer, “but I’m afraid my current employer really needs me right now and I just can’t bear to leave her,” his free hand gesturing to the stroller where their daughter slumbers peacefully.

Felicity sighs, pure happiness filling her heart and clearing her mind as she rests her head on her husband’s chest to gaze lovingly at the chubby-cheeked, perfect amalgamation of her and Oliver they brought into the world just four short months ago. “Sounds like she has you wrapped around her little finger.”

Oliver rests his chin on the top of her head and she can hear the love and contentment in his voice when he whispers in her hair, “From the very first moment I met her. She takes after her mother that way.”

A/N: Thank you for reading! I hope this helped to soothe the sting of all the angst. Queen family feels FTW. William was not in this fic because at that time of day, he should be in school and also I didn’t want to traumatize him any further with Olicity’s blatant flirty flirt. The poor kid has seen enough already lol.

Huge thanks and virtual hugs to @allimariexf and @hope-for-olicity for all the fun conversations and being all around wonderful :)

Oliver’s ‘current employer’ ;)

#this was really short #but i finished it #i'll take that as a win #olicity fluff #olicity ficlet #olicity future fic #my fic

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lifesizehysteria · 6 years

Text

Journey to You - Chapter 15 | An AdamsFoster Fic

A/N: I haven’t been adding the links to this story on other sites since I started updating again because of that change tumblr made where external links keep posts from showing up in the tags. But I thought it would probably be good to link back to the original chapter in case anyone wants to start at the beginning who may not have read the whole fic already. Check that out here. That post also has a link to the whole story on ff.net so follow that link to read the story as a whole. I’m also going to update all of the tumblr posts so all of them have a single tag that doesn’t have all the other posts about the story that aren’t actual updates.

If you’re looking for somewhere else to read it where it’s a little easier than tumblr, it’s available on AO3 and ff dot net under the same username. I won’t link to those for the same reason as above. Sorry - you can thank tumblr for that.

“You’re sure you’re okay?” Mike asked as he and Stef walked out of the school.

“I’m fine, Mike.”

“Really? Because you seem off.”

“I’m just a little emotional, alright? I just dropped my kid off for his first day of school.”

“I know. I did, too. But this seems like more than just that.”

“Yeah, well, not all of us drink until we don’t feel anything,“ Stef muttered under her breath.

“Well now I know something’s wrong. That was a low blow even for you.” There was a bite to his words and Stef immediately regretted her snide comment.

“Mike, I’m sorry. That was a shitty thing to say. I know you’re going to AA and you’re really working on it and… I’m really glad.” She sighed and rubbed her hand across the back of her neck. “I don’t know… I guess I am in kind of a weird mood.”

Mike stopped them, putting his hand on her arm. Genuine concern shone in his dark eyes.

“What’s going on, Stef?”

Stef shrugged and looked down at her shuffling feet. Guilt crept up her spine. Lately, he was so much more the man she remembered. He was so different when he was sober and she recognized this person. The one who was kind and funny. The one she had built a family and a life with, who she had tried so hard to convince herself she could love.

“I don’t– it’s… it’s nothing. Just one of those days, y'know?”

“Sure.” Mike looked at his watch. “Look, Stef, I’ve got some time before my shift starts. We could go get a cup of coffee, talk about it if you want.”

Stef licked her lips and swallowed as her guilt grew stronger. She tried to smile but it just pulled tight at the corners, uncomfortable and awkward.

“Thanks, Mike. Not today but uh, maybe a raincheck?”

“Sure, okay.” Mike nodded. He searched her face and Stef was reminded that, even with all that had gone on between them, Mike still knew her better than almost anyone. “Take care of yourself, Stef.”

A small smile tilted her mouth to the side.

“You, too, Mike.”

Mike kissed her cheek for the second time that morning and she walked to her car wondering how she could bring herself to hurt this man who, after everything, still loved her.

The hours at home alone dragged on and Stef was grateful kindergarteners only went for half days. How many times since her son was born had she wished for him to be in school so she could have some peace and quiet and some time to feel like herself? Of course, that was before the separation. She had more than enough time to herself now that Brandon was regularly at Mike’s. Now she cherished all of their time together and didn’t want to lose even a second of it. Just like when he was at Mike’s, the house was too quiet without him and all it did was give her mind time to run in endless circles.

She was wracked with guilt about Mike and the hurt she was going to cause him. And Brandon. She hated that no matter what problems she and Mike had, she was always going to be the reason her son’s family was broken up. But spending the morning together like the happy little family she wanted them to be hadn’t been enough to convince her. In fact, it had done just the opposite. Seeing Lena for just a moment had made her feel more than she had ever felt in all her years with Mike. Now that she understood why, she knew that Lena was right. She couldn’t go back. No matter the consequences, with Lena or without, forward was her only choice.

Stef left the house to pick up Brandon as early as she reasonably could and was waiting with a dozen other eager parents outside the classroom. When he walked through the door with his backpack hooked over his shoulders and a smile plastered on his face, she bent down and caught him as he flung himself into her arms. The smile on her face was as big and full of joy as his.

“Ooh, my baby!” She squeezed him until he grunted then released him only to kiss his cheek over and over. “I missed you so much!”

“I missed you, too, Mommy.”

Stef gave him one more quick hug before standing back up and offering her hand to him.

“Are you ready to go home?”

“Do I get to come back tomorrow?”

“You do!” she said with a chuckle. “In fact, you get to come back every day until Saturday!”

“Okay! I’m ready!” Brandon beamed up at her.

“Alright then. Let’s head out to the car and you can tell me all about your first day of school.” Brandon took hold of her hand and they headed down the hall.

Brandon chattered non-stop about his day all the way to the car. He was deep into a story about a boy who got hurt during recess as Stef got him buckled into his booster seat and she listened with intent. She wasn’t sure she had ever heard him talk this much for this long before. Her heart was soaring by the time she got in the car and they were on their way home.

“It sounds like you had a really great first day of school! What was your very favorite part?”

Without hesitation Brandon said, “When I saw Lena.”

Stef’s head snapped up toward the rearview mirror.

“What did you say?” Just the mention of Lena’s name had her heart beating faster.

“Sorry, I mean, um, Miss Adams?” he said, his face scrunching with confusion.

“No, baby, I didn’t mean…” Stef shook her head, impatient to get more out of her son. “You saw Lena at school today?”

“Uh huh,” Brandon confirmed, nodding his head and grinning.

“What, uh… When did you see her?”

“At recess! I asked if she was having recess, too, but she said no. She said she just came to say hi to me.”

“Oh. That was very nice of her,” Stef said, trying to keep her tone neutral despite the pounding in her chest. “Did she, um, say anything else?”

“She wanted to know if I was having fun at school. I said yes because I got to do art. She said she loves art.”

“Art certainly is a lot of fun. Anything else?” she prompted again.

“She said if I ever need help at school to tell her. Do you think she will help me write my ABCs? Mrs. Atkins had us do five letters and it was so hard!”

“I think she probably means if you get lost in the hall or something happens that upsets you,” Stef said, a hint of laughter coloring her words. “That was a very nice thing for her to offer.” She felt a twinge in her chest, grateful that Lena would look out for her son that way. “Was that it? Was that all she said?” Stef felt a little uncomfortable grilling her five-year-old for info but she was desperate to get everything about Lena she could out of him.

Brandon looked down at his lap, a crease forming between his eyebrows.

“What is it, love?”

“Um…” Brandon picked at the hem of his shorts. “She said another thing but…” he trailed off and glanced up toward the front seat.

“Brandon?”

“Well, um, she told me not to tell you… But you said if a grown up ever tells me to keep a secret that I should tell you, right?” His face was contorted with confusion and Stef felt just as conflicted. She knew just as well as Brandon’s intuition did that Lena’s secret wasn’t one he needed to tell so making him tell her felt like an invasion of privacy. But she also knew consistency was important and she would rather Brandon overshare now than under-share in different circumstances. Never mind that she was desperate to know what Lena had said.

“That’s right,” she said after a moment, ignoring the inkling of guilt already nagging at her. Brandon stayed quiet, his eyes drifting up toward the rearview mirror. Stef smiled at him. “It’s okay, love. Lena’s not gonna be mad at you for telling me. I promise.”

When Brandon spoke again, his words came slowly.

“Um… First I said, ’When are you gonna come over again?’ and she said, ‘I’m not sure.’”

“Mhmm,” Stef encouraged when he paused.

“Then I said, ‘I miss you,’ and she said, ‘I miss you, too.’” Brandon stopped and looked down again.

Stef looked back at him, confused.

“Was that… Was that it?”

Brandon shook his head.

“What, baby?”

Brandon took a deep breath, then continued. “Then I said, ‘Mommy misses you, too’ and she said, ‘I miss her, too,’ and that’s the part I wasn’t s’posed to tell you.”

“It’s okay, bud. You did the right thing, okay?” Even as she soothed her son’s worries, Stef couldn’t ignore the way her in stomach danced. Lena missed her!

“How come she said not to tell you?”

“Uh, well, sweetie, I think she just probably, y’know, didn’t want me to feel bad.”

“Are you guys in a fight?”

“Wh– uh, what? No, we’re not– Why would you ask that?”

“Because Lena doesn’t come over anymore. You and Daddy used to be in fights a lot and now Daddy doesn’t live with us anymore.”

Stef sighed to herself. How had her little boy ended up with so many grown-up worries? She wanted nothing more than to uncomplicate his life but it seemed the adults in his world, herself most of all, were making that impossible. Part of her wanted to be angry at Lena for putting Brandon in the middle. It seemed so unlike her. She had always been so good with Brandon, so conscious of what she said and how she said it. It was so unlike her to tell him something like that and expect him to keep it a secret. In fact, the more she thought about it, the more Stef started to wonder… Was it possible that Lena had wanted him to tell her? Was she banking on his honest nature to make sure Stef knew? It seemed impossible and yet… Her heart started to skip.

“No, baby, Lena and I aren’t in a fight.” She didn’t make it a habit of lying outright to her son but maybe… Maybe it didn’t have to be a lie. Not if…

“Then how come she never comes over anymore?”

“We’ve just… Well, we’ve been busy, I guess.” Stef glanced back at him in the mirror. “You miss her a lot, huh, bud?”

“Uh huh.” He nodded for emphasis.

“Me, too.” She tapped her thumb against the steering wheel, her mind racing. “How would you feel about seeing her more often?”

“That would be awesome! Lena’s the best!”

A slow grin spread across Stef’s face.

“Yes, she is,” she said quietly.

There was a voice telling her to shut up, that she shouldn’t even be entertaining any ideas right now because Lena had told her it was over. But she couldn’t hear that voice over the chorus of possibilities that were running through her mind. Now she was convinced that Lena had been watching her that morning. What if it didn’t have to be over? What if that wasn’t what Lena wanted? If Lena really wanted the clean break she said she did, why would she seek Brandon out to check on him at school, to make sure he was okay on his first day? Why would she tell him that she misses not just him but Stef, too. Obviously, she still cared about him. About them. And they both loved her.

Adrenaline surged through Stef as she pushed away any nagging doubts and grabbed back on to the last shred of hope she had thought was long gone.

“I have a couple of things I have to do first and I have to talk to Lena but… I’m going to do everything I can to make sure we get to see Lena a lot more.”

When Brandon whooped from the backseat, Stef laughed, not even trying to contain the brilliant smile spreading across her face. She was planning. There was no guarantee that it would work. Lena had already given her the opportunity, more than once, to do what she needed to do and Stef hadn’t taken it. There was a good chance she and Brandon could both still end up broken-hearted. But Stef’s heart was already broken and now… Maybe she had a shot at mending it. It was a long shot. She knew that. But she wasn’t one to back down from a challenge, even when the odds weren’t in her favor, and if better late than never was all she had, she was going to run with it.

#otp: adamsfoster #adamsfosterfic #jty #the fosters #fanfiction #written by lifesizehysteria

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fyeahwonderbat · 6 years

Text

In the Middle of a Broken Constellation - PT. 7

Pairing: WonderBat (Wonder Woman x Batman) Rating: T / 14A Universe: N/A - Reader’s Choice Previous Chapter: <- Chapter 6

The buzz in the lobby of Wayne Tower was chaotic the moment Bruce led Diana off of the elevator and towards the main entrance. Guests were paralyzed, employees were trying to busy themselves so as to appear worthy of being in his presence, and it gave her the impression that his arrival was like that of a foreboding thunder cloud, as if they had all been struck by a single bolt of lightning once he had appeared before them. A storm of his own design, he walked tall and made sure to put more weight into his heels when they reached the intricate tile design in the center of the marble floor.

Yet, in contrast to this moment entirely, his own energy moments ago was similar to that of his staff when they were alone in the elevator.

Diana knew that he must have felt he overshared when discussing the absence of his parents from his life, despite the conflicting report he had given her to what she had always believed to be the truth. In an effort to appear confident once more he had silenced himself to present her with a mysterious front, however, it was clear that he was regretful of the way with which he had portrayed such a personal matter. Bruce couldn't have known that he had confided in her a handful of times in the past, and seeing him shut her out when they were alone as they traveled down to the ground floor gave her the genuine feeling of her stomach plummeting inside.

But the sharp turn he performed when he was inches from the revolving doors in the lobby drew her out of such melancholy though, as he offered her his hand. In the blink of an eye, they were meant to forget the end of their conversation and return to a much more socially acceptable state of a potential boss' boss and a new hire. "It was a pleasure meeting you, Miss Prince. I hope Lucius makes the right choice."

Taking her victories where she could find them in times like these, those words really wound up the crank she had in her back, pulling her shoulders back and returning the gesture with ease. "I appreciate your confidence, Mr. Wayne. I'll be sure to let you know what he's decided by tomorrow morning-"

She allowed for a beat to pass between them, just to watch his brows attempt to pinch together over his nose, wondering what she meant by her words. "-when I stop by your office to say hello, before heading to my own."

Both of their grins must have seemed so cheeky, as she realized that they mirrored one another with how quickly they smiled. "I'll be on the lookout for you then. I get the feeling you aren't one to disappoint."

"No, but I am the type that makes you wait and see what it is you'll be getting." And with one last strong-armed shake, she let Bruce go for the moment - as regretful as she was to do so now that she finally had him so close - and exited the tower with her head held high. Once she stepped onto the sidewalk, Diana took a deep breath to reward herself for the strong performance she had put on in her meeting. The sun still hadn't made its way into Gotham, but it hovered behind the weakest cloud coverage she had seen over the city thus far, and she saw that as a wonderful omen.

"Well who would have thought," a voice she knew all too well stole her away from her moment of peace, and Diana turned her head so fast to the right that she could have given herself whiplash. "I would have found you exactly where I left you."

Diana had to force herself to swallow the name she typically called her friend, as they were in public. And, she thought to herself as a sidebar, she would most likely need to get in the habit of referring to him by the name that others did on Earth. "Clark!"

Dressed in the same suit as he was the day before, only with a slight shadow along his jaw, Superman stood before her in his civilian disguise and looked completely worn. "Sorry I was gone so long. I should have contacted you or Victor, but I got really swept up with Vicki."

"You were with her ever since you ran off yesterday?" Diana couldn't hide her surprise as she gawked at what he was saying. Never mind his job, she couldn't help but wonder how Lois would have felt about that.

But to match her shock with his own, Clark pointed at the building behind her and rightfully asked, "Were you just walking out of Wayne Tower?"

They stared one another down, as if a mutual understanding passed between them, letting the other know that they both had to do some outlandish things to get the information they required, and Diana knew she had no right to judge anyone considering the lengths she was going to for this. Sighing, she decide that if they all had time off today, she knew where they'd be catching up. "Why don't we talk somewhere more private?"

"Or we could go to a diner, have a cup of coffee? I could really use one right about now." Said the man who had all of the powers in the universe. Maybe Gotham's constantly cloudy coverage wasn't providing him with the energy he actually needed, she couldn't help but wonder.

As they walked, Diana led him towards the city parking lot that was across the street. "I'll order some food up to the apartment. How does that sound?"

"Apartment? Whose?"

"Well," she hummed as she clicked the automatic start for her Mercedes, listening to his roar to a start as they stepped beyond the chain link fence and into the lot. "Let's just say there's a lot you need to be caught up on."

Jason unlocked the door to room 15J and swung it open by holding onto the top of it. "Welcome to best apartment in Gotham's East End!" cheered the young man who was behaving much more like a realtor than anything else. Diana watched his playful persona fade ever so slightly when he saw who she brought with her. "Oh hey! Welcome back. I thought you were dead."

"Because I went to talk to someone?" Clark wondered, sounding surprised that Jason would make such a leap in logic.

Diana, despite being amused by the conversation, made sure to question him with an arched brow. "Can I enter my apartment now, please?"

For the first time since she met him, Jason not only obeyed, but he did so without a word. Now that her doorway was empty, Diana stepped inside and looked at the apartment that she had blindly purchased through the 'reigning Batman's' eyes in the middle of the night. The first thing she noticed was the brick walls, which nearly sent her into a tizzy. "Jason!"

"What!?" Was his panicked response as he stayed against the door he was so fond of holding onto.

"You didn't tell me the walls were exposed brick!"

"What's wrong with that?" To her surprise, Clark got the question out before Jason did.

It was all she could do to keep her voice down. "This is an older building, isn't it? How old?"

Quick to defend himself, her unofficial realtor seemed to take offense to her question and put one hand on his hip while the other motioned to the small entryway they were all crammed in. "It was torn down and rebuilt by Bruce, like, twenty years ago. He made sure everything was up to code while making sure it still had that old Gotham charm."

"Why is that an issue, Diana?" Came the innate curiosity of Clark Kent.

"Because these types of surfaces aren't energy efficient and can create mold very easily. If there is brick sealant on them, it's not as much of an issue. An accent wall is fine, but an entire apartment?" After having moved from many places in her immortal lifetime, Diana had learned many things about being a homeowner, and what she needed to be careful of when sacrificing sensibility for aesthetic.

As the door slammed closed behind them, Jason grumbled. "Gee, tell us how you really feel," Her vibrant eyes met his instantly, but he wouldn't take anymore of her critiques. "It's not the whole apartment, all right? This hallway has it, the backsplash in the kitchen and the fireplace are brick, and the two bedrooms each have an accent wall. Otherwise, it's fine."

Trying to diffuse the tension in his country boy way, Clark muttered with honest excitement. "Ooh, a fireplace."

Hearing that little attempt of his to find the silver lining made Diana feel like a bit of a tyrant, and she knew she had to reign herself in. Moving from her old apartment to Gotham suddenly was costing her so much money, and she'd no doubt have to downsize her belongings. Everything in her civilian life was happening so fast when she was usually so much more orderly about switching locations, finding new lifestyles and reinventing herself.

It wasn't a reinvention this time, she knew.

It was a more like a sting operation.

"Is this a walk-in closet, in the front hall?" Diana wondered aloud as she opened the door. Indeed, there was enough room to store all of her coats, at the very least, given how far back the bars went. Considering the square footage of the place, the storage she had discovered already was an instant point in Jason's favour.

Taking on his apparent side job with great pride, he even decided to point out another great aspect. "If you notice, the hardwood flows throughout the entire place, from the closet to the living room to the bedrooms."

"Perfect," Diana praised his attention to detail more than the flooring as they finally decided to enter the apartment itself. Immediately to their right was a very long living space, with that highly revered fireplace on the wall closest to her. It would have been a feat to not be impressed by the size of such a lounge area, given that there were supposedly two bedrooms as well. In fact, the room that was cutting off the possibility of an open concept made her wonder. "Is this the first bedroom here?"

Jason smiled wider than she anticipated. "Yup. It's a bit of an awkward spot since it's between the kitchen and the living room, but I think it's so the bathroom and kitchen can be closer, since they both need plumbing?" The more he went on, the more it sounded like he was trying to answer a teacher's question in a classroom and lost his train of thought.

Diana noticed that as well, considering she could see the fridge sticking out of the kitchen from her stance in the hall. Peeking in, it was somewhat cramped, but there was a dishwasher staring her down from the other end of the room and she was incredibly grateful to know that she'd have one here.

The bathroom was tiled with a large enough bath, and the linen closet sat right outside the door for convenience, which Diana appreciated as well. But again, she was enamoured with the two closets that sat across from the bathroom, as it allowed for even more places to store her collectibles, the treasures she had found throughout her time of traveling the world, and it meant she wouldn't need to place them in some sort of safety deposit box at a bank in the city.

Then, they reached the master bedroom and Diana felt all of her worries melt away. She could make anything work in her favour when it came to living spaces, so long as it didn't cost her an arm and a leg. Nevertheless, the size of her own little oasis - her private quarters where she could shed her persona and just be herself - was surprisingly generous. Purchasing the place as quickly as she had made her worry about the faith she had blindly put in Jason.

Quickly, she had realized that he was more than deserving of her trust and admiration.

When she turned to face Clark and Jason, she realized they had stood in the hallway and were anxiously awaiting her verdict, unable to move while she had wandered throughout the apartment. Giggling to herself, she called to her realtor. "Jason?"

"Yeah?"

"I love it." "I knew you would!" So he said, but the exhaustion in his tone hinted that he might have been lying. Making her way back over to the other two, she noticed that even Clark was much more relieved. Until he was punched on the shoulder, that is. "And now, I have a handy muscle man to help me move in everything tomorrow."

The wording of his observation was rather odd to Diana. "You're going to take care of the moving trucks? You don't have to do that."

"Well, it's the least I can do for you since you put your name on the lease." Again, the way he was carrying on with the conversation felt as though he had a different perception if what was to come than she did.

Now, it was Clark's turn to take Diana's side as he crossed his arms and removed himself from Jason's side. With a furrowed brow a straight lined lip, he chose to get straight to the point. "What aren't you telling her, Jason?"

A gloved hand ran through black hair, highlight the white stripe that resided over his forehead. It was impossible to appear calm while exhibiting such nervous behaviour, but having only known him for a bit more than a day now, Diana wasn't surprise that he'd attempt it. "It's not that I am not telling her something, it's that I was hoping that I could make a deal with her and crash in the second bedroom." To emphasize his point, he presented exhibit A of his argument by motioning to the very bedroom he was hoping to live in for the foreseeable future.

Though it wasn't an inconvenience, Diana was definitely disappointed to be finding out about his intentions this way. "Why didn't you just ask me last night, when you were helping me comb through listings? You were so adamant I had to have a second room for an office, but now it leads me to believe you tricked me into this location."

Her disillusionment didn't reach Jason, or rather, he wouldn't let it impact his attempt at convincing her to let him move in. "I'm not trying to take over the room! I'll sleep on a futon, and I'll fold it up into a couch before I leave in the morning. I just can't stay at the manor with Alfred the way he is, so I don't have anywhere to stay in Gotham now. But I'll work off my debt to you, I promise."

His face had sifted through many emotions as he proclaimed his thought process to her, and Diana knew he wasn't truly trying to lie to her. In all honesty, she could afford a place this size on her own quite easily and didn't need a second income of any kind, so it wasn't off putting to have Jason stay as a guest. Based on the way he had gone about things, it was clear to her that he didn't feel as though she would have accepted his suggestion of living together if he asked her outright and that must have stemmed to the way he had been treated in the past. He had projected rejection onto her and hoped to have gratitude motivate her decision.

When, really, she knew how to handle this predicament with simply her heart.

"Jason," Diana began with her signature tone, lightly stern, completely genuine. "I would never turn you away from staying with me. You can have the second bedroom, but make sure you're more straightforward with me in the future. Is that clear?"

Never before had she been able to truly study his face so precisely, as the way he gaped at her allowed her to take in of the smaller features of his face. So overcome by her generosity, he couldn't front the defensive guard he was so proud of. So stunned was he, that she didn't even anticipate a notion of gratitude. It meant the world to her that someone like Jason trusted her enough to want to stay with her, to share a place with her and be in each other's space for more than just what their joint 'mission' might call for.

She knew Jason would abide by her one rule, which is why she didn't mind in the slightest when Clark looked towards her and decided to move beyond the conversation at hand. "I'm glad your apartment is to your liking, Diana. But I do have to make it to the Daily Planet at least at some point today, so would it be all right if we discuss what I learned from Vicki?"

"Actually, I think we'd like to know what she said too."

There was a new voice in the conversation, distinctively male, and he referred to more than one entity suddenly entering not only their discussion, but the apartment too. The intrusion echoed, which made it clear that whomever had decided to drop by hadn't used the front door, like a typical guest would have.

Together, Diana, Clark and Jason rushed towards the living room to greet the intruders with their fists at the ready. It would be a tumultuous moving day if she add a battle in her living room to her to do list, but as she rounded the corner, she recognized the latex costume of a certain Gothamite she had met before.

"Huntress?" It wasn't as though they had planned to meet again anytime soon, but for her to be standing in her newly purchased apartment was rather startling.

Especially when she brought company with her that she had yet to introduce.

"Dick!?" Jason exclaimed with a tone of astonishment, leading Diana to believe that he wasn't cursing at the young man standing by her window. The only thing she was certain of, was that she had the most batty housewarming party on her hands, pun intended.

((What!? They are gonna be roomies!? I think this is such a cute idea, and it was thanks to my conversation with saultnpeppah last night that made that happen, so thank you for your wise words and patience! I know LOTSLover and I adore the show Fixer Upper, so I wanted to try and paint a vivid picture of what Diana had gotten herself into by purchasing this place in Gotham's East End. I hope it was okay!

Also, I made Jason respond to Diana's offer to stay in a way that was similar to this one moment from the original Titans run, where Donna asked him his opinion as Robin and he was shocked because no one ever asked him that before. I wanted to draw upon that version of him for that scene, because I think that little boy is still inside of Red Hood, you know? I hope you enjoyed the chapter as much as he enjoyed being invited to stay, and you'll stick around for the next chapter! ~ Maiden))

#in the middle of a broken constellation #maiden writes #wonderbat #wonderbat fanfic #wonderbat fanfiction

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