#oh my god what happened to these why r they so bad on mobile …

[twinkskeletons]

x

[goddess-of-green]

I saw your akatsuki kisses post! I loved it and now i wonder if you could do one about cuddles? Or maybe just hugs pls 🥺

Warnings: GN!Reader, language, mentions of blood

◙ Tobi

‣ Cuddles with Tobi can go two ways

‣ You have sweet boi just wanting to be held by you, and hyperactive manchild spinning you around and squeezing you so tight you can't breathe

‣ But we love both ok, stan whatever the fuck Tobi is

‣ Tobi likes to lay his head in your lap and wrap his arms around your waist, snuggling into your tummy while you run your fingers through his hair and he tells you about his latest shenanigans with Deidara

‣ He likes to be the little spoon, please don't make fun of him

‣ Obito likes it when you sit in his lap and snuggle into his chest, it gives him palpitations

◙ Pain

‣ Pain lowkey loves to cuddle with you

‣ Be careful though

‣ If someone happens to walk in on you two he has no qualms with shoving you out of his lap and acting like the big bad boy he thinks he is

‣ Please wrap your arms around him after a long day and just kiss his piercings and let him know how much you lust for love him <3

‣ He prefers to be the big spoon fragile masculinity he weighs like 50 pounds guys but if he had a long day or he's just being needy he'll have you wrap your arms around him and run your fingers through his hair

‣ Konan caught you two cuddling once and never let him live it down (she approves)

◙ Itachi

‣ Cuddling with Itachi is very peaceful

‣ And sometimes sad for no reason??

‣ Everytime Itachi sees you he acts like it will be his last time

‣ If he trusts you, he'll tell you about his baby brother, Sasuke, while you lay in his arms and squeeze his midsection when he starts to get sad

‣ He savors your touch and runs his fingers through your hair, while you hum or tell him stories about your life before you joined the Akatsuki

‣ You try to keep the sad parts out of your stories, and Itachi does the same, you can both agree that cuddling should always be happy

◙ Kisame

‣ He could literally just wrap his entire body around you and suffocate you if he wanted

‣ Big boy, big pillow, big cuddles, big comfort

‣ big

‣ You like to just,, lay on him when he comes back from a mission and he'll wrap his arms around you and squeeze you tight enough for you to know that he fucking loves you

‣ He'll occasionally let you be the big spoon if you can manage to wrap your arms around his monster torso

‣ You love the feeling of him enveloping you in his arms while you two just, lay together, close enough for you to smell the sea salt on him <3

◙ Kakuzu

‣ Honestly, is cuddling even an option with this man??

‣ Depends on how whipped he is

‣ But if you look up at him just right and give him those eyes then...well, how could he say no?

‣ Acts like he hates it but holding his love safely in his arms makes him feel warm inside, all five of his hearts flutter

‣ Will let you go if he so much as senses someone else nearby

‣ If you happen to fall asleep on him he would never push you off

◙ Sasori

‣ Prolonged hugging? Why? Why would he willingly give up the mobility of his hands just to touch you?

‣ But then he tries it, because damn it his love always gets what she wants

‣ And oh, you are very warm and ew he loves the way you feel against him

‣ Snuggling into his neck was the last straw

‣ "Ah, love. You always find ways to rope me into your odd displays of affection. Sometimes I wonder if you are more clever than I am."

‣ He'll have you sit in his lap, keeping him warm while he adjusts his creepy corpse puppet weapons

◙ Deidara

‣ As long as he minds his hands, you guys are pretty much always cuddling

‣ Or at least wrapped up in each other in some way

‣ You were laying in between Deidara's legs, his arms around you and Tobi asked if he could join the cuddle train

‣ He likes it when you run your fingers through his hair, (it makes him blush when you compliment it)

‣ Sometimes he'll just..take you out on his clay bird and you'll lay in his arms while you guys watch the sunset

‣ You tried to be the big spoon once but you practically ate Deidara's hair, you are forever little spoon hahahaha

◙ Hidan

‣ Will just wrap his arms around you if the desire strikes him

‣ He likes to come up behind you and wrap his arms around your waist, putting his chin on your shoulder and licking kissing your cheek with a smirk

‣ It hurts his manly ego to be the little spoon but real men like the feel of their women's arms around them he tells himself

‣ Can't help but genuinely smile when he sees you cuddled up to him, half-asleep and completely peaceful

‣ Tries very hard to not melt when you run your fingers through his hair

‣ Will sometimes just come up behind and hug you, waiting for you to realize that he's covered in blood and now you are too :)

◙ Konan

‣ oh my god she will suffocate you with her adorableness alone

‣ She has a huge rack so you can feel her up against you when she's the big spoon oops

‣ She gets really shy and will blush if you even suggest cuddling in front of others

‣ please just hug her, snuggle up to her and wrap your arms around her, make her blush

‣ Lay on her thighs, they are nice squish

‣ She smells like tea and rain and ohmygod don't tell her she will blush so h a r d

◙ Zetsu

‣ Cuddling might be a little difficult at first with Zetsu, he has a venus flytrap and two different personalities??

‣ Black Zetsu completely dismisses the idea at first, he is too good for gross human affection

‣ But White Zetsu really wants to try it and you're pouting and god dammit it's like the world wants to watch him burn

‣ "Ugh, come here, brat. Before I change my mind." "Yay!"

‣ He will never admit it but he finds he likes how warm and nice you feel in his arms

‣ White Zetsu blushes a lot and Black Zetsu insults him even though he's blushing too and you just can't see it

[northlight14]

Breakup’s, birthdays and drag shows

Description: Roman and Janus broke up and now Roman can't celebrate his birthday with him. Now it's Virgil's job as his best friend to cheer him up.

TW: breakup mention, crying, cursing, Janus isn't intended to be unsympathetic but since Virgil doesn't like him it might come across that way, alcohol mention, brief violence mention, let me know if I need to add anything else

Ships: platonic prinxiety, past roceit

Genre: hurt/comfort

Prompt: alt prompt 4, drag (prompt by @pridewrite2021)

Virgil was browsing the card isle looking for a birthday card for Roman when his phone started to buzz. He pulled it out to see it was Remus calling him.

"Ugh, what is it Remus?" Virgil said, already not interested in whatever Remus had gotten himself into.

"Hey Virgin! Can you come over?" Remus chirped.

"I'll be coming over later to drop off Roman's card. Why, what's up?"

"Well, you know how Roman and Janus broke up last week?" How could Virgil forget? Roman had spent the entire week being an absolute wreck and Patton and Logan had to hold Virgil back in order to stop him beating Janus up.

"Yes." Virgil gritted out through his teeth.

"Well, Roman just realized that he isn't gonna be able to celebrate with him and that this is gonna be his first birthday without him in 3 years and what not. So now he's crying in his room, lookin' like a hot mess. And since he's your best friend and all I was wondering if you could come and cheer him up or whatever."

"What! How the hell am I supposed to do that?!" Virgil yelled, before realizing he's still standing in the middle of the card isle, hiding his face which was now scarlet.

"I don't know man but you'll come up with something! You're like a brother to him, Virgie!"

"You actually are his brother, Rem!"

"Come on Virgil, please!" Remus pleaded through the phone. "I just...I really don't know what to do, here." He said, voice suddenly going quiet.

Virgil sighed. "Ok, I'll be ten minutes."

———

Virgil always forgot how big Roman's house was. The drive way alone seemed to go on for ages, outlined by large trees and red rose bushes. The pathway to the door was a red brick and clearly well taken care of. The house itself was a faded red brick with large windows and balconies. The front door was too tall and painted black, standing in the middle of two white pillars.

Looking at where Roman lived, it was easy to see why Virgil had disliked him at first. When they'd first met, Roman had a much bigger problem with his bratty rich kid attitude and with his life seemingly perfect from an outsiders point of view it was easy to see why they clashed. after all, Virgil had absent parents and had to work several jobs to help pay bills. But as he got to know Remus better it made it much easier to see through Roman as well. Mr and Mrs Prince were nice enough but they had a bad habit of pitting Roman and Remus against each other, both with academics and creative pursuits. It turned out Roman's arrogant attitude was a coping mechanism for his surprisingly low self esteem. It also turned out that Roman wasn't just "lazy" when it came to school work like Virgil had first thought, but he was actually struggling with ADHD. The more Virgil learned about Roman and the more Roman learned about Virgil, the closer they became until they began to see each other as brothers. Brothers that would make fun of each other relentlessly but brothers non the less.

Virgil knocked on the large door and waited for a response. Not too long after, Mrs Prince answered. She was a tall and slender woman with tanned skin. Her dark hair was tied perfectly in a bun. She wore a black dress with a red shall, both of which looked as expensive as Virgil's car.

"Oh, hello Virgil. I assume you're here for Roman? Remus said you were coming." She said.

"Uh, yeah. Can I come in?"

"Of coarse, Roman should be in his room. He hasn't come out since this morning." She said, stepping aside to let Virgil in.

'Oh God.' Virgil thought to himself before heading upstairs and hoping he would finally be able to remember which room is Romans.

In the end Remus came out his room and pointed Virgil in the right direction but hey, no one else needed to know that.

Gently, Virgil knocked on Romans door and waited to be let in.

"Remus, I told you to go away!" Roman yelled from inside, his voice sounding muffled.

"Hey Roman, it's Virgil. Can I come in?"

There was a brief moments pause before Virgil heard a quiet voice he decided to interoperate as Roman inviting him in.

Virgil was very taken aback by the sight before him. The room, which was usually kept as neat as possible, was covered in tissues, chocolate wrappers and a mix of opened and unopened presents. Roman was sat on his bed, eyes puffy and hair messy.

"Um, hey, are you alright?" 'Fuck sake Virgil, obviously he isn't.' Roman sniffled, smiling despite himself. "Yeah, I just...I miss him, ya know?"

"Yeah." Virgil said, sitting beside him. "Oh, um, I got you this..." Virgil awkwardly passed him the card.

Roman smiled, accepting it. "Thanks."

"So...what do you want to do? For your birthday, I mean." Virgil said, trying and failing to hide his discomfort.

"I don't know..." Roman sighed, looking down at his hands. "I was just going to continue to watch Carmen Santiago. But I always watched that with Janus. It was our show, ya know? He'd always make a comment about how she's still stealing and I'd counter it with how she's stealing from thieves so surely that makes it ok! I don't know, it just...it feels wrong to watch it without him..." Roman laughed sadly. "Which sucks because the last episode left on a cliff hanger and I really wanna know what happens next." He laughed a little at his own expense.

Virgil couldn't help but smirk. "Well, why don't we go out somewhere?"

Roman looked down again. "I don't know..."

'Crap. What the heck am I supposed to do here?!'

Virgil looked around awkwardly. He then spied in the corner what looked like a new makeup pallet. Roman must have gotten it for his birthday. 'Bingo.'

"Hey, why don't we do each other's makeup?" Virgil offered.

Romans face immediately lit up. "Really?!" He said, excitedly.

"Yeah, why not?" Virgil said, scratching the back of his neck.

"Well last time I asked to do your makeup, you said you'd rather stab yourself in the eye with your eye liner."

"Yeah, well..." Virgil coughed. "Consider it my birthday present to you."

Roman immediately shot up and grabbed the eyeshadow pallet and several brushes. "I promise you won't regret this!" Yeah, Virgil was already regretting this but Roman seemed happy and that's all that mattered.

———

The brushes tickled Virgil's face as Roman layered the purple eye shadow. Virgil almost started to object as Roman began to apply silver jewels at the edges of the eye shadow, before stopping himself. Roman then finished the look by applying a purplish pink lipstick and brushing Virgil's bangs out of his face. He then handed Virgil a mirror. The look was very 80's glam, far from Virgil's usual style but he had to admit, it looked really good. The eyeshadow looked sharp, the upper lid being a lighter shade than the under eye and corners of the eyes.

"It looks great!" Virgil said, admiring it. Roman smiled proudly from the compliment. "Alright." Virgil said, taking the eye shadow pallet. "Your turn."

Roman laughed. "I appreciate the offer, rainy day real estate, but I don't really wanna look like I haven't slept in a hundred years." Roman teased.

"Says the guy who's went entire weeks not sleeping because he was binge watching a new show!" Virgil teased back.

"And I'll have you know I wear that like a badge of honor!"

"Besides," Virgil continued to laugh. "I know how to do other makeup looks."

"Ok..." Roman said. "But if I end up looking like a Tim Burton character, I will kill you with my bare hands." They both couldn't help but laugh.

Virgil decided to go for a similar style that Roman went for, layering different shades of red and mixing in some gold glitter. He also decided to draw a small crown on his right cheek, just below the eye. The look was then finished off with red lipstick to match.

He passed the mirror over to Roman who gasped in delight at his reflection. "It looks so good!" He exclaimed.

"Yeah? I'm glad you like it." Virgil smiled, pulling back on his purple patch hoodie after taking it off to give himself more mobility when applying the makeup.

"Wait, wait, wait!" Roman said, waving his arms in front of his face before jumping up and handing Virgil a black leather jacket that was hung on his chair as well as a pair of purple tinted heart glasses. "Put these on!" He exclaimed.

Virgil once again pulled off his hoodie, replacing it with the leather jacket. It fit him surprisingly well considering Roman was a fair bit taller and more muscular than him. He then put on the glasses and Roman eagerly pulled him off his bed and guided him to his full length mirror.

"Wow...I actually look really good." Virgil said.

"See! I told you!" Roman laughed.

Virgil examined the jacket. "I didn't think you'd own a jacket like this. Did you steal it from Remus or something?" Virgil asked.

Romans smile suddenly dropped. "It, uh, it was Janus'..."

Shit.

"Oh, um, sorry." Virgil said, honestly.

"It's ok." Roman sighed, sitting back on his bed. "I've been meaning to give it back. Especially since it still has his wallet in it. But that means I'll have to see him and I don't think I'm ready for that yet."

'He left his wallet in here?' Virgil put his hands in the pockets and sure enough, Roman was right. Virgil quickly started to feel all too powerful now knowing this.

"Hey, come on, let's go out somewhere. Show off your makeup." Virgil tried again.

"For someone who looks like they belong in a vampire novel, you're awfully eager to go outside." Roman laughed.

"Come on, I just think it'll do you some good to get out for a bit."

Roman averted Virgil's gaze. "I don't know..."

"Come on, man. Do you really want to let that jackass ruin your birthday?"

Roman sighed. "Ok, fine."

Virgil waited outside Romans room as he changed out his pajamas. When he came out, he was sporting a white shirt paired with a black jacket that had a red floral pattern. He was also wearing a pair of glasses, his in the shape of two fairy wings that matched the gold in his eye shadow perfectly.

As the two walked out the house, Roman called "Mom, weren't going out! I should be home soon!"

His mom sounded surprised by this but happy non the less. "Ok sweetie, be back soon!"

"So where are we going?" Roman asked as they walked out the house.

"How the hell should I know? I'm just winging it." Virgil laughed.

———

The two wandered through the town as the sun began to set, the reds and oranges bouncing off Romans glasses and the glitter perfectly. Virgil was all too aware of the judging looks they were being given but when he looked at Roman, he seemed happy. And right now that's all that mattered. Just keeping Romans mind off Janus.

Eventually, Virgil began to hear the sound of music and he subconsciously started to follow it, Roman tailing behind. As he wandered through the town he eventually found the source.

A bar putting on a drag show.

Roman was staring off into space, standing next to him. Virgil tapped his shoulder, pulling him back to reality. "Hey, I know what we're doing."

———

Romans face lit up once more when he saw the stage. It didn't seem like they missed too much, which was good. The drag queen that was stood on the stage currently was singing, her hair done big with makeup that shone and reflected the lights perfectly. Her dress black and covered in sequins and frills. The heels she wore didn't look comfortable in the slightest but she walked in them with ease.

The two sat at the bar. They were each 18 and 19, meaning they wouldn't be able to drink but given the circumstances, it was probably best if Roman didn't get drunk right now.

Instead, Virgil just ordered them some non alcoholic drinks and fries. Roman was about to hand him the money to pay but Virgil immediately declined. "My treat. It's your birthday after all." Virgil then remembered Janus' wallet still in his jacket pocket. 'I mean, if Janus is the reason we're here, it's only right he should be the one to pay for us, right?' Virgil couldn't help his smirk as he handed the money over.

The night continued and Roman and Virgil cheered loudly for each queen on stage, each one quite different from the last. Virgil watched as any sign of grief seemingly dissolved from Romans face.

The final queen for the night came on the stage and they both watched with joy as she performed.

"I know what you're doing, you know." Roman said, not taking his eyes off the stage. Virgil froze instantly, slowly daring to look at his friend. Roman once again had small tears in his eyes but he wore the most genuine smile Virgil hadn't seen on him in ages. "Thank you."

Virgil smiled at his friend. At his brother. "Of coarse."

-------

Authors note: I’ve been wanting to write something based on the glam looks Thomas posted for Roman and Virgil for a while now and I obviously wanted to write something for Romans birthday. So when I saw the prompt for today was ‘drag’ I immediately thought “well that’s convenient”. So happy birthday Roman! Anyway, hope y’all enjoyed. I’m still practicing my writing and hopefully I’m improving. 

Reblogs >>> likes

[theguardianace]

Today’s date: June 22nd, 2021 (eleven days until Ace returns)

I love video games, but I don’t think I ever talk about them here! Here are some of my favorites and why I like then <3

The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild: ohhohohoh I could talk about this game for AGES. It’s so fun. I mostly love this game for the open world and the secrets. You can literally go anywhere and find something to do. It’s so diverse and so beautiful and aaa!!! And to this day I still learn new tricks and tips for the game, despite the fact it’s been out for years now. Fun fact: I beat all the shrines, completed the map, collected all the medallions, beat Gannon and all the blights, yet still have around 50% map completion! Why? BECAUSE THERE’S NINE H U N D E R E D KOROKS. I have like 550. I should probably go back and collect the rest of them some day.

The Legend of Zelda: Age of Calamity: It’s BOTW, but its a hack n slash! I like to play it and feel like an absolute unit taking down all those enemies. And there’s a happy ending so :) (I won’t say what happens cause spoilers but I actually really liked the twist? It would have been cool for events to play out 1:1 but also really sad. And because time travel was already introduced, staying on canon wouldn’t have made too much sense anyways. Plus, Sidon my beloved :D ). I have like 70% percent completion in this game for some reason. I actually can get it to 100% so I absolutely will be doing that.

Pokken Tournament: It’s Pokemon! But you actually get to FIGHT! It feels like battling in the anime, and it’s just so fun. I haven’t played in so long though, I should get back into it! I used to main Suicune, but now I main Decidueye. Lucario is a good backup, too. Oh, and it looks super realistic, too! They really went all-out with the detail in the models and particle effects.

Genshin Impact: I have this on mobile. It’s super fun, despite the fact I have not played since the Windblume festival! It’s really similar to BOTW in the travel mechanics and open world, but there is a lot more story within it. It’s such a beautiful game, too. Remind me to post some screenshots I took when I get back! I decided to go explore the world instead of actually doing quests, so I have a full map and every teleport waypoint at like. Level 20. I don’t actually know if I was supposed to do that or not.

Sky: Children of the Light: This is exactly my niche video game interest. Beautiful open world, focus on exploration, guiding spirits home, lore that only unfolds as you traverse (the most important of which only after you beat the game), and a focus on friendship. It’s a little buggy since it’s still in development (I think it is, at least), but it’s easily one of my favorite games. Highly highly recommend.

Pokemon Shuffle: Ok so this one is kinda random but I just want to brag a little? It’s some super random Pokémon Candy Crash-esque game that I was super obsessed with in eighth grade. I haven’t played in forever, but I am on level 416. I think I earned some bragging rights there.

Mario Kart: I am a god at Mario Kart, at least when I play with friends. Me and my bestie were playing Mario Kart 8 together recently, but her sister left with two races left. I played two people at once and didn’t even get last place. I think I got like 5th and 7th? Not bad. It’s actually pretty fun, would recommend as a challenge!

Animal Crossing: New Horizons: Animal Crossing my beloved <3 My island is absolute trash but I just love how peaceful it all is. It’s so relaxing. I also have this one villager named Jeremiah, he’s a frog and I would do literally anything for him. He’s just so cute I love him. I also have a cow named Tipper and a penguin named Roald and a goat named Nan and I just. Aaaa they’re so sweet.

Sending love from the void!

Ace <3

[heresathreebee]

Garrote part 12

[Starz Power Diego Jimenez X Jazmine Mann (Black!OC)]

Summary: Healy and the Jimenez’ are gearing up for war. Jazmine’s getting antsy waiting for something to go horribly wrong. Previous Masterlist Next

Rating/Warning(s): Mature (+18 or I call the police). post-coitus fluff, swearing, anxiety, time skip, canon typical violence (I think...?), all plot, gringo using google translate Spanish and half remembered high school classes (sorry in advance), mentions of grooming/pedophilia (don’t worry, Porsche’s OK)

Word count: 2.2k words

Author’s Note(s): yeah so I wrote this back in December and just didn’t have the heart to put it out. I wanted to try and finish the other chapters (thinking I’m gonna wrap up at seventeen chapters) and I couldn’t. I have a problem with finishing anything I start, it never feels strong enough. I’m gonna try not to let that stop me though, promise. 

Waking up in Diego’s arms, Jazmine never expected to feel so calm. Truth be told she didn't really wake up, but drifted in and out of sweet harmonious consciousness to find Diego, whether he was cradling her or sitting up or rubbing her back. She finally managed to convince herself to get out of bed and by then it was already 2 in the afternoon. Diego had his pants and shoes back on but nothing else, so she relaxed a little. 

"You need to eat," he whispered, "come on, get dressed." 

Jazmine blinked slowly. "I need a shower. Maybe a wheelchair, too." 

She didn't miss the proud smirk that suddenly graced his handsome features. As he put on his shirt, Jazmine glanced past him at the open door of the closet. It was empty inside save for a few hangers, but it left a bad taste in her mouth and a lump in her throat. Diego followed her line of sight and said nothing. He let her shower, never more than five feet away (which is exactly how far the shower curtain is to the bathroom door). They ate somewhere family friendly, a pancake house she barely remembered the name of. Her legs still suffered from tremors and her pelvic region ached, but they were good feelings and she tried to make them last as they put a smile on her face. 

~

It's been about a week and Jazmine has seen neither hide nor hair of Haagen and it's starting to worry her. 

The only relief she had been able to accrue these past few days had been Healy's announcement that they had made a huge connection and were in the process of setting up task forces to take Haagen down. Alicia was confident that Haagen knew nothing and was continuing on with business as usual (or so she heard through the grapevine), and even Diego seemed to be relaxed about it. 

That was another thing that bothered her. Diego, relaxed. Diego doing more hands on business and clubbing at all hours of the night. He'd barely said two words to her after coming to the rescue and fucking her silly in front of Haagen. 

Sitting alone in the penthouse, Jazmine scratched at every itch and tugged on every baby hair like her skin was diseased. She didn't want to go outside, she was too afraid of Haagen's next move. She had been texting her mother regularly again just so she wouldn't call and have to explain why she sounded so nervous. It would have taken LaShawn all of ten seconds to realize something was wrong: so why couldn't anybody else see it? 

Maybe she was overreacting. Jazmine drew a hot bath in the jacuzzi sized tub and turned the jets on, finding bubble bath solution and a pink rubber ducky to cradle. The bathroom had a dimmer switch she turned down to near zero and let silky smooth R&B from the 90's wash her worries away. Her fingers worked to squeeze the ducky like a stress ball, and a traitorous part of her brain whispered longing thoughts. 

I wish Diego was here to massage my back.

She shushed her thoughts: at least the bath is perfectly hot. 

She washed her body and spent the better part of the day deep conditioning her hair and shaving her legs just for the hell of it. The music never stopped, it simply rolled from R&B to classic rock and then back again. Miguel checked in only to make sure she ate, and Jazmine managed to convince him to eat with her and play a co-op mobile game for a few hours. She plucked at the listening device in her ear for the thousandth time and decided to just call Healy. 

"Hey can't talk right now," were all the words she got out of him on the second call and then an immediate hang up. 

Jazmine growled and crossed her arms, suddenly reminded she was still wearing nothing but a bathrobe. She slipped into a pair of jeans and a tank top, and feeling bold, she marched up to Diego’s room and swiped a black button down that smelled like him. She tucked it unbuttoned into her pants and swanned up to the penthouse roof with a bottle of wine and one glass. 

She knew she would miss this level of extravagance. Never worrying about paying for rent or for food or selling her time and labor for someone else and next to nothing pay. Jazmine wondered what Diego would say to becoming her sugar daddy after this whole human trafficking business was over, but shook her head and topped her drink off. 

Probably overstayed my welcome, she thinks, that’s why Diego’s been distant lately. 

~

Jazmine was unnaturally quiet on her end, though Healy recognized the tinkling sound of bottle to glass. Probably on her fourth drink if he was counting correctly. No matter– she was safe for now at Diego’s penthouse suite and there were more pressing matters to attend to at the moment. Brasa was leaning over each and every agent sat in the boardroom as if to intimidate them into obeying her every command. She was a good detective, really she was, she just needed to work on trusting the people who trusted her. Her partner Holbrooke was no help at all– selective mutism was a nasty habit to overcome. Brasa had not breathed a word of thanks in Healy’s direction, but he had expected that. This wasn’t about the praise– it was about justice. 

When he could finally break away for coffee and a piss, he sent a text to Alicia. No doubt los hermanos Jimenez would be thrilled with the intel– but what would happen next? 

The safest place for Jazmine right now is Diego’s place, he thought, but for how much longer?

~

An address and a transcribed photograph of the documents they came from. Healy had told them that the most likely scenario for Porsche’s whereabouts was ‘adoption’ by people who did not want any adoption documents to surface later on. The family probably has prestige, they may have lost a child recently and are looking to replace it like a goldfish and hope no one notices. 

It didn’t stop Diego’s trigger finger from inching closer and closer to his gun at every small pump of the breaks. 

“Tranquil, hermano,” Alicia soothed. “We’re almost there. We can kill them after we get la pequena back.” 

Diego sniffed and hopped out of the car as soon as it finally parked. Alicia was right behind him, checking her peripherals on the well lit streets of this upscale neighborhood. It was them two and one guard each, a second car bearing two underlings coming in from the back door and four cars with heavily armed back up around the corner in case things went south. Brother and sister climbed the porch steps idly, slipping their guns back into their hidey spots before knocking on the front door…

~

“Fuck.” 

Jazmine’s phone battery flashed at 3%. She didn’t remember finishing the bottle, but she did really have to pee so she stood up from the pool’s edge to relieve herself. Miguel was asleep on the white leather couches in the living room, mouth open and drooling with his gun on the table. The woman’s steps were a little unsteady and her vision came in waves, but she felt that fuzzy warm buzz and decided she had better not drive. 

She shook the young man awake with a sigh. “Hey, I left something at my apartment. Can you drive me?” 

Miguel pursed his lips. “I don’t think jefe would want–” 

“Please,” she said, “it’s important.” 

Miguel relented, swiping the keys to a Ferrari from the rack by the elevator and handed Jazmine her coat. Just a few more items she couldn't live without. The way Miguel drove meant they were there in no time at all, and every light they passed by in the dark somehow made Jazmine feel lighter, less jittery and anxious. She had Miguel drop her off by the backside of the apartment and climbed the steps alone after insisting she would only be a minute. All of her doors and windows were locked, the place looked exactly as she had left it. 

“Thank god.” 

She had to search for her charger, a sparkly teal thing with a cat and an alligator charm on it. She found it hiding under her bed, then found her way into the bathroom to check on her face in the mirror. Jazmine fingered the black hickeys on her neck, smiling to herself. She caught sight of something white hanging out of the trash and dug it out: her Chicago shirt. Stuffing it into her back pocket next to her phone charger, Jazmine took one last look at her apartment and blew a kiss to it. 

“Bye,” she whispered, peaking into the dark and lingering on the memories she was about to leave behind forever until finally the lock clicked into place. Oh shit, this was the wrong door. Miguel was waiting out back– 

Pop-pop-pop

Gunshots rang out from behind the building, the returning fire was short and stilted, overwhelmed by the repetition of an automatic. Jazmine took to the stairs at the far side of the building and ran down them wishing she was in something other than slippers. Her heart began to pound in her chest and her breath billowed in heavy clouds before disappearing. The second she stepped off of the last stair, she tripped. Her flimsy footwear slid on the thin layer of ice and she fell, her eyes and ears following the clink clink plop noise of her phone literally going down a storm drain. 

She barely had time to scramble back to her feet before she heard tires come screeching around the corner down the street and she stumbled into a run. 

Jazmine wasn’t sure how far she’d gone, and she can’t recall how many streets she turned on, or even if she was being chased at all. Every sound made her jump, and every car coming her way made her anxious. Her lungs burned for air as she finally collapsed against the window of a minimart. There were tears streaming down her cheeks as she pushed the door open to hide among the tiny rows of snacks and gum and cigarettes and refrigerated beverages. The store owner was wearing headphones and didn't bother looking up. Deep breath in. Exhausted, shaking breath out. Jazmine curled tightly around herself to try and calm down before her heart exploded in her chest. 

~

Alicia and Diego have the father on his knees and bloodied. His wife and children are being held upstairs in one of the bedrooms, terrified. Diego wipes at a small spot of blood from his sister's face. 

"Donde esta el bebe?," Diego said, grasping the man's ear and dragging his head back to look at him. "I won't ask you again." 

"What baby?" The man coughed dryly, his eyes nearly swollen shut but still glimmering in fear. "I don't know what you're talking about." 

Alicia kneeled down in her white pantsuit. "The baby you bought from Jeremy Haagen, Mr. Fletcher. A beautiful little girl with dusky hair and big brown eyes. A baby that belongs to us." 

Fletcher squirms under the murderous gaze of los hermanos Jimenez but doesn’t break. 

“You know, Diego,” Alicia said leaning on her brother’s shoulder, “I didn’t see a fourth bedroom.” 

Diego pursed his lips. “So?” 

“So the contract specified a room for our mariposa, and he already has two children. Where’s the other room?” Alicia’s heels clicked as the gear turned in Diego’s head. “I bet la senorita Fletcher might know.” 

“No, please,” he begged, “leave my wife out of this– she’s got nothing to do with this!” 

“So you do know what we’re talking about,” Diego’s aha motion garnered a vague threat with the point of his gun– gold plated, of course. Emeralds in the hilt this time. 

“Secretly adopting a baby girl,” Alicia tsked, kneeling before Fletcher and brandishing a knife, “when you have two perfectly healthy girls of your own? Ay dios mio, what’s the matter? Three’s your lucky number, but your wife doesn’t put out anymore?” 

Fletcher stumbled hard over his words and made next to no sense. One thing that did make it clear through the haze of nonsense struck a nerve with the Jimenezes: “I didn’t know she’d be that young!” 

Alicia exchanged a queasy look with her brother. She had heard of it before: grooming. Usually starts when a girl is anywhere between nine and eighteen. Fletcher continued to ramble, about hiring a nanny and raising the baby anyway since Haagen didn’t do resales. He was probably just trying to get the baby off his hands…

Before Diego could pull the trigger, his phone rang. So did Alicia’s, both projecting the same number from a burner phone and three emojis to designate the caller: Healy. Alicia answered for Diego, jerking her head towards the door and mouthing, ‘I’ll take care of it from here.’ Diego reluctantly slipped outside, glaring at the nosy neighbors in the window who disappeared in a flash. He put the phone to his ear just in time to hear:

“– I need you to get to Nassau now: Jazmine’s in trouble.”

@mental-bycatch @kid-from-new-zealand @1zashreena1 @girlpornparadise @nicke0115 let me know if I missed anybody, I’m sorry it’s been so long

[otakumagicmusicgamer]

Spoilers Ahead for the first season of My Next Life As A Villianess <3

Oh where to begin. First of all, when the summary said it was a comedy of misunderstandings, I got scared. I have really bad second hand embarrassment and it’s a very fine line of Dense Misunderstandings For Comedy and A Cringefest of Pain For “Comedy” (even playing an anxiety spiral itself for laughs). But oh! How I was happily surprised! It really goes with the flow and doesn’t rely on ridicule or anything. There’s just Catarina, dense weird wonderful Catarina, and everyone in some fashion accepts her for her. So this is actually pleasant to watch!

Now, Catarina- what a delight. What makes her interesting is she takes Fortune Lover Catarina and humbles her. Takes selfish and mean and spins it 180. If she puts out mean into the world, it comes back at her in the end. She knows she has the potential for a ‘scary face’ and actively chooses not to use it. And her feelings on the matter are not just for survival, theyre genuine too. But what makes this fascinating is her lack of accounting for things *not* in the game. She doesn’t consider, by blazing a new path in the game -where Catarina is nice- that new ‘routes’ form. She focuses on Maria’s pov so much, she doesn’t see her own. She doesn’t see the good she’s put out, cuz she’s supposed to be the antagonist. She’s so focused on the doom flags, she doesn’t realize there *are* no doom flags. There’s nothing for the game to doom, no punishment for cruelty. What’s more, even by taking the place of ‘The Suitors’ in scenes with Maria, she doesn’t consider /any of them/ having feelings for her. (Geordo kisses her neck for crying out loud.) Why? Because Catarina Claes is not a romanceable character in Fortune Lover. There are a lot of paths, but she is not one of them. She has no successful romantic relationship, nor any. Which makes this whole anime downright Fascinating. By taking out the antagonist, there is no doom. By inserting a reborn earnest friendly kind tree-climbing high school girl in her place, there is no Fortune Lover. The fact that she is aware of Fortune Lover makes her almost omnipresent, and putting all her points into Survival and Durability and Craves Sweets and nothing else, makes her human. No high marks, denser than bricks, but damn if she ain’t the prettiest embodiment of a Nokia phone. She’d be an apocalypse survivor. “How did she survive a landslide in a volcano? Idk it’s Catarina.” Oh, and the last scene? The friendship ending? Yeah, she’s not wrong. It is a friendship ending.... for Maria. She ends up with none of the interests and stays good friends with them, no bad blood or nothing. Cuz again, Catarina isn’t a love interest. It just so happens that the entire company present in the area is so fucking in love with her that they say the Line Of Romance to her and, while they may bicker, they do not hold bad feelings for each other. If all of them could be married to Catarina and live in a big ol house together, they’d be so fuckin content. And best part? None of this is condemned. No “ya gotta pick one and only one”. They saw a harem and went ‘ya know? Let’s embrace this’ and now the characters r so chill with their plant growing, tree climbing gf. (I’m sure her mother wishes *something* good could rub off on Catarina lol) You hear that? That’s the sound of a Polyamorous nerd feeling validated. (It’s me, I feel validated by this Polyamorous romcom anime, this is my home now)

My thoughts on the rest of the cast aren’t going to be as long. The anime does a good job of going through each characters thoughts and arcs. And I adored Anne’s POV on things as well, how she is also moved to tears by Catarina’s good heart. Even her mother, who is harsh but only because she cares. (I would have loved to see the look on her mother’s face when she was in the coma, how she would have grieved, what she would have reflected on. Her father is a bit more transparent in emotions, but he would have been great to see too). I also would have loved to see Mary and Maria in the book of desire. I figure Maria would kinda be like Alan, but oh, what would Mary have done? (Guess I need fanfiction to answer that lol.) Keith’s role as a love interest for Catarina is the only least liked thing I have on here. And honestly it’s cuz they keep *calling* them brother and sister. I know they’re not actually siblings, mostly that’s left over from Fortune Lover, and “distant relative” can and is shorthand for a lot of things so like it’s even possible they aren’t related at all. And the characters don’t find it horrible that he loves her, and probably know he’s a Distant Relative so they’re like whatevs. So like, it’s not incest. It’s not even as potently close to incest as anime can get. But it’s the only thing that could be deemed a Flaw about this anime, so it stands out. I do wish the ending couple of eps could have been a little more Maria, and her having a bit more importance in general. Also her light magic having an effect a bit in the ‘fight’ with Sirius. Although I do want to think the green glow of hope was Maria, tho I’m pretty sure the assumption is Acchan.

Which btw can I say was an absolute treat? I suspected something was up with Sirius but I did not suspect that. I wonder what his base magic is, if it isn’t dark magic? I had thought he saved Sophia and Catarina and thus also had wind/light magic. But oh man, when he started lashing out on Catarina cuz he thought she was also faking kindness? That she was purposely saving people? That a part of his resentment of nobles was being projected? That somewhere he also caught Feelings and thus the mage doubled down on his control? That when Catarina looked at Sirius and touched his hand and face, her (Nerd™️) instincts kicked in and pieced everything together and also saw him in such pain and misery? That she holds herself to the antagonist title, that she’s there to ruin and thus can’t *save* anyone, (a bittersweet sentiment) so she’s not intimidated by the burst of dark magic and just honestly wants his friendship and sit with him through his pain? MY HEART! IT SCREAMS! (I love this sort of dynamic yes Ive loved Fruits Basket for years don’t look at me like that).

What else.... the little peppering in the fact that Oh Yeah She’s Dead hit like a truck. The little bit with her family, of her past life? Yeah, ouch. Got me crying. Don’t think to much into that rabbit hole, you’ll get sad. I fucking ADORE the twist of Sophia being Acchan, or at least part of her. Her being so scared of loosing her best friend (and love of her life) again? Yeah, tears man. Catarina accidentally mending the relationships between Geordo and Alan and Maria and her mother was great. Having Mary and Sophia dance with Catarina at her birthday party was a delightful touch, as was not having all the romance novels be m/f, and none of it was a joke or negatively placed- just *there*. I do enjoy the interests butting heads with each other over private time with Catarina. It was mostly Geordo and Keith (“they’re such good friends” girl if they had a tenth of lil Alan’s Fight Me energy you’d have to put them on leashes) but I loved the little bits of Geordo vs Mary and Sophia cheering on Nicol and I reeeeally hope to see more of that. To provoke subtle sass from Alan and Maria would be a great sight, and more of Raphael joining the ranks. I laugh at all the times they mutter “gotta protect her, she’s seduced another one” cuz like, girl ain’t doing shit but running into people that happen to be Moron-sexual, holding their hand and refusing to leave. And they KNOW that. And it’s great. edit: HOW COULD I FORGET HER MAGIC! God I want Catarina to get better at magic. More than just Earth Bumps pls

All in all? I love this anime. 9.5/10. Tis good stuff. And if ya read all my late night/oops it’s 4am ramblings, good on you! I feel bad tagging this cuz it’s long but I’m also on mobile so god knows what this actually looks like but I needed my thoughts down so hey, thanks

[mothbug]

maggie i’ve been trying to suss out the plot of ur bug lesbians for so long please tell me abt them. somehow it got into my head that they were?? like jaeger pilots? please confirm or deny

i can’t do a read more on mobile so i’m sorry in advance (coming back here after i’ve written this: it makes no sense. it’s all rambling. sorry. and i just put things everywhere randomly so this won’t even be typed chronologically)

yeah there’s giant fun robots! most of them are normal and fine but like a few of them are very fucked up

so there’s four pov characters and at the start of the story three of them are on the same ship and the fourth is the target they’re chasing? only one of them knows they even HAVE a target and is trying her best to stall because she and the target were roommates in fucked up robot catholic school. the other two are playing crazy 8s and being romantic and also terrified all the time but also doing a lot of theorizing about things because they know SOMETHING is up they just don’t know what’s going on. Bc you know. their commander won’t give them any information. and also avoids them because she hates narrative parallelism

also the one stalling is also having her blood drunk by her giant robot. and maybe being mildly possessed by it? so it’s maybe The most fucked up robot. it’s also a giant dog and a good boy. and an heirloom of a fucked up family. which may explain some stuff but honestly i think nisa’s mom was just a bitch and it didn’t have anything to do with the robot she’s just like that.

and she’s stalling bc she Knows she won’t turn perovskia in she knows she wouldn’t let her get hurt she Knows it’ll change her life forever if she finds her and she’s just not ready to face that. but yknow she has to so it was all just very silly of her but when something will change your life dramatically it’s terrifying even if you know that things currently Suck.

somewhere in here Arkansas’s family is threatened and it’s. upsetting. and i’m not sure what direction to go in with it but it will be important because her family means a Lot to her. she has two very good kind dads and a little sister named Tinsel. basically she has the only functional biological family out of all the characters and they make me :’) I also think they eventually meet Idabel and ADORE her and since she grew up without parents it’s just a very strange and emotional experience and. h. they r Wives. and the Trust family is all very sweet and kind even if Arkansas struggles a lot w gifted kid syndrome like i think her dads did their best even if they fucked up sometimes yknow. idabel goes fucking wild at the arcade like legitimately bloodthirsty and arkansas is just like i love my furious and powerful wife

anyway there’s some (a lot of) homoerotic space fighting (which perovskia usually wins BECAUSE she remembers when she and nisa used to spar and can predict what she’ll do. nisa ALSO remembers this bc. ofc she does. but perovskia had to learn how to adapt after Events bc her physical health changed a lot and she had to learn to be more careful about overexerting herself and also now knows how to swordfight. and moves more fluidly and confidently. so what nisa expects to happen often doesn’t bc perovskia’s fighting style has changed so much while nisa hasn’t really bothered to refine hers. anyway) perovskia (the gay little target that does a gay little crime and makes fun of you to piss you off) is like hey. what if you all committed treason it’s really fun and sexy. and then her adoptive mechanic mom gives everyone spinal surgery so their bodies don’t shut down and they won’t die :) that’s a thing by the way i won’t elaborate bc uhh :( but it is why perovskia has all the. nerve damage and chronic pain. i can elaborate on the actual Pre-story perovskia stuff later bc i think about it A Lot and it has a lot of bearing on her character but it’s also. before all this. but anyway if she hadn’t been bleeding out on Slice’s front lawn specifically she Would be dead. and there’s some fun narrative foil character shifts that happen four years before the main storyline but i will not say bc i’m tired

after this is Vague in my mind but a lot of it is Perovskia and Nisa reconnecting and just. talking. but being weird and repressed and deflective about anything Meaningful. And I have written a Lot about this so there’s more than I can condense but it’s very fucking good and. Idk. it’s a big shift in the narrative at this point and they’re just Agonizing about their dumb little feelings and it’s good. and P doing some work to make their giant fucking spaceship more stealthy. and Idabel and Arkansas being really cute and also going THROUGH it because i mean. a lot is happening. And it’s nothing either of them ever expected to happen but they’re like. hopeful for the future or whatever don’t look at me. It’s just like. put all of these characters on a spaceship in the middle of nowhere in transit and they all Have to have conversations even if they don’t want to because it’s HARD. nisa is forced by slice to learn how to make pancakes

Slice makes stew. They’re good at stew and contraptions and having a mild new england accent somehow. also canonically back in the scrapyard they would make things like the knife wielding tentacle constantly and perovskia would just stumble upon them. slice changed the live laugh love sign to say die cry hate because perovskia made fun of it. they r her mom.

so now they do some fun fun robberies and various crimes and it’s so sexy and i don’t think N and P are like. fully caught up at this point or know where they stand, so there’s a lot of very fun banter and having to work together despite really being afraid but also yearning to get to know each other again and just connect with one another honestly and openly after four fuckin years apart. because they’re both so different now but also very much the same. horse staring out into sea MAN. the thing is there’s no direct like. reason for them to avoid each other (at first P was shocked and overwhelmed and felt a little bit betrayed when she found out who was chasing her until she found out WHY. oh i forgot to mention Nisa BEGGED to be assigned commander for this mission bc she knew anyone else wouldn’t hesitate to get Perovskia killed. Forgot to mention that it’s IMPORTANT she fucking loves her so much god DAMMIT) but it’s just. tense and there’s a lot happening and it’s just. Ghhhdhbnm and ofc I and A have picked up on it since P showed up but it’s like. ok so what is Happening here. OH AND ONCE THEY START WORKING THINGS OUT IDABEL DOES START BEHAVING LIKE NISA’S SHITTY LITTLE SIBLING AND ACTING FUCKING DISGUSTED BY THEM ITS VERY FUNNY. they’re like perovskia you’re pretty cool what’s up with this. nisa sucks and also is a bitch. and perovskia says SHE CAN GET IT. and idabel says GET WHAT? BANNED FROM OLIVE GARDEN? and perovskia fans herself and is like yeah~ and idabel was just joking around but now is debating between mercilessly making fun of her and hitting her with a cricket bat. but god when P and N just get to hold each other in silence and security and just be. it’s . they. god. fuck. man.

oh i know this is a space story but perovskia just straight up has a sword (and some knives and maybe a gun idk) don’t ask me why idk but it’s very lesbian of her and she does gay little flourishes and is just. very annoying and i like her a lot. she’s very dramatic like her alias was madame revenant when she was living in the scrapyard and just doing some petty crimes like. she embroidered that jacket herself nobody calls her that she’s just a goofball. also warrior cats exist and she makes warrior cat fan animations. that just has to be true so warriors has been preserved for centuries. also she was presumed dead for a while uhh don’t think abt it too much but she likes that aesthetic.

Idabel takes the best to this new life of crime they are fucking FOR it she gets a FLAMETHROWER and Arkansas is like. wrow honestly my favorite thing abt them is that they’re both fucking INCREDIBLE pilots. like they know what they’re doing. and nisa is really really bad at it btw she cannot pilot a mech well. but this block of text isn’t about her i’m talking about THEM. Their chemistry is so good they r just. 🥺. and they both become Fast friends with perovskia because she’s just pretty likeable?? and ofc nisa’s jealous bc a) you guys don’t even like me :( but also b) that’s MY friend. it’s very funny. honey of course they didn’t like you you were being very unpleasant to be around. but arkansas does rlly wanna be friends with her and she and idabel have so much sibling energy it’s insane. i think they’d abel and cain each other for a scooby snack but also kill for each other. because they’re tiny girls who will growl at you solidarity and also probably hang out and just destroy things with bats sometimes. they all become closer and get a rlly sweet found family dynamic it just takes a While. oh also idabel is basically the chosen one and can set things on fire with her hands but it’s barely touched on because i think that’s a really funny thing to just ignore. but i also think it does become important because it’s largely fueled by anger and emotion and. h. i think idabel has a lot of feelings ok. Arkansas and Perovskia bond over having fucking anxiety disorders and have caprisun drinking competitions. i think it’s just like. these people all have similar trauma and need people to lean on when things are hard so they stick with each other once they have the option to split apart because by then they’re friends and work well together and Care. auto tuned baby crying mp3.

Alia and Agent Variety show up somewhere around here? They’re Slice’s very cool wives and Alia has a Vechicle Collection and own fucking stupid race cars and stuff and I love her. perovskia is afraid of being in vechiles so she has to take a fucking benadryl every time they have to make a getaway. Variety isn’t actually an Agent anymore and I also love HER because she’s very fucking good. they started out as just contacts slice had but it turns out they’re all in love <3 alia is also actually a sports car racer like. unprofessionally. illegally. which is just very cool of them.

Also i don’t think it has. a very BIG end, yknow? it’s like, they’re doing very good things and are up against a lot, and I don’t think they like.. singlehandedly take down the government or anything because they’re only a few people. but i think they get a happy ending and get to grow old while making positive changes to the world around them. like i don’t think they’ll be able to solve everything but they’re sure as hell gonna do what they can. But idk maybe they actually do get like. some good shit done. but again they’re not. an army. they’re a bunch of 20-somethings and their rube-goldberg-machine-creating chaperone. but i think they should get a fun climactic moment so i guess this is all to say i don’t. have an ending planned. but there should probably be one at some point.

OH AND the giant evil blood sucking dog vineyard vines robot Definitely almost kills Nisa (or at least fully destroys her in some way) and. it’s very narrowly avoided and she’s very very weak for a while because it took a lot out of her. also the dog robot does make grape vines grow and uhhhh any grapes that show up are 100% full of the pilot’s siphoned blood. also i think there’s still some remnants of that bitch in nisa’s mind afterwards bc an old mechanical god is hard to get rid of. but it’s mostly ok.

Also the bug people are just. a thing. like every person in the most recent generation in this specific society are at least a little bit genetically experimented on because. it sucks there. and i think if your parents bribe the government you can be a little Less fucked up but yknow. everyone’s a little weird. this was an excuse to put bug ppl in here they’re just the folks who were probably the most fucked with and i have many bug people here because i think bugs are cool and i want them to look like weird little bugs. This was all also an excuse to give the main characters fangs bc i’m gay. i don’t think randomly fucking with your genetics will make you a bug in real life so do not try this at home or at all PSA

SPEAKING of the society ok it’s very much obsessed with earth nostalgia and stuff and very yknow. basic cyperpunk shitty capitalism you know the drill you’ve seen space operas whatever but it’s also weirdly oligarchical? and like? it’s weird and bad and kind of a corporatocracy?? and. fuck. idk man they’re a fucked up space catgirl greeble-y amazon with catholic imagery. The Academy is also a thing but. idk how to describe it more than i already have it’s just kinda shitty boarding school. And after a certain point ppl can get sent on like. missions and stuff? in their fucking robots? but again i’m not sure what For. an option could be that there’s nearby Shit and nobody can tell if it’s safe because space is weird? also it’s only about 3200 so i’d say like. whole societies out in space is a relatively new thing and there’s some weird shit going on. so they sometimes send teenagers out in robots to see what’s up and that ends SUPER well for EVERYONE. hmm something SHOULD be going on actually there should be some weird eldritch space stuff. it should be connected to the more fucked up robots. it should also be Core’s fault somehow because uhhh capitalism and lack of foresight? anyway here’s women kissing i don’t know things. WAIT FUCK I FORGOT TO MENTION HOW SHADY SOME OF THE STUFF GOING ON IS LIKE THE DEATHS OF THE CREW PEROVSKIA WAS ON UHHH JUST TRUST ME DUDE like they are NOT afraid to get kids killed which was IMPLIED but also like it goes a little deeper than that and uhh i don’t know exactly what’s happening. but i’m sure it’ll all fall into place eventually. basically it’s very fatt shitty faction vibes idk how else to describe it. man it‘s like. just. there’s stuff happening they have goals and ideals and there’s probably more to it than i know so far bc stuff happens but i don’t KNOW what i’m tired and have been typing this for a year i don’t want to talk abt the bad capitalists i want to talk about tenderness and girls but unfortunately the ways in which the girls are tender are deeply informed by the environment they grew up in so i do have to think about it even if they all deserved better.

i think they all get a cat or a dog or something eventually. like they all deserve it. i think the final home they build together is actually pretty reminiscent of the scrapyard house. i think they get to live there for the rest of their lives and. just build something small and wonderful for themselves :’)

also i forgot to put men in the story they exist i just forgot about them. there’s nisa’s one ex i already forgot his name but he’s mentioned i think.

[hypnotixstorm]

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* to do list *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Key

Normal Text = Have NOT started working on the request

Bold and Pink Text = I am CURRENTLY working on the request

Once I have completed a request it will be REMOVED from this list

Can I get an imagine of Hiei from Yu Yu Hakusho? Maybe an AU hundreds of years ago where he ends up caring for a human woman and teaching her how to defend herself. If you don't like that one, anything you think of.

Character: Kanda from DGM NSFW Prompt: "Make me." Love youuuuuu 😘

How about a NSFW scenario of Kakashi coming home to his sweet little naughty civilian S/O? 😜 A bit of role play where they call him sensei while he's doing them on the kitchen table?

Thanks for the Soi Bean Post! This gonna be my last Soi Fon request. Sorry for being quite a Soi Queen freak. For my request can you Soi after shower decides to wear s/o clothes. S/O tries to take picture of her. Then she tells that she has falling in love with you. You have changed let me take care of you. You can be very very very sluff on this one. Thanks!

ok ok so i have a few requests 🥺🥺 so! first could you maybe do an “I missed you.” with Rukia? 🥺💗 just fluff for my baby girl aaaa

Ichigo kissing his s/o in the rain 😆😆😆 Headcanons or scenario is up to you! 💙

ANYTHING SHIKAMARU. Deadass anything

Hey! I was wondering if I could request some Rukia x fem!reader relationship headcannons? Only if you're able to! Tysm! 💖

I hope requests are open but I was wondering if you could do something with byakuya and his s/o being like a very intimidating couple but his s/o is actually very sweet to everyone?

Kakashi x reader and instead of team 7 its now y/n tryna see whats under the mask and eventually she just asks and he actually reveals it adfhsjjs

Can I please get rat dad Ging being seduced by a younger woman who refuses to take “no” for an answer until he finally gives her what she wants? NSFW please! 💖

ok so please don't feel pressured to write this birthday imagine 🥺 i know u have a lot of requests rn ah. but! if you're able to i really would love another toshiro one bc i'm a sucker for him 😭 maybe one where he's really overworking himself so the reader helps him relax and it just ends in cuddles 🥺💓 only if you're able to! ilysm 💓💖💓💖💓💘💓💘💓

ok i swear this is the last one i feel bad requesting sm 😭 but maybe a “Do you wanna, maybe, go out sometime?” with toshiro bc he really is best boy 🥺👉🏻👈🏻

OKAY SO ANOTHER ONE WITH SABURO WITH UHHHH GOING ON A FIRST DATE WITH HIS S/O ICIXHAJGSSHSSUSKSU he'll probs driving his van around with the music blasting out 👀👀

honestly i would kinda die if u wrote some renji smut 😳😳 literally in any situation, i'm just needy rn 😭

ok ok i'm here hehe. how about, the reader gets really injured during a battle and shiro's kinda blaming himself for it. kindaaa angst into a super fluffy ending if that's ok hhh 🥺

Hi 🥰 Can I get a headcanon for Kakashi with a really seductive s/o, like she likes to tease him in public and whispers dirty things in his ear and calls him daddy? Nsfw pls? 😊😁

“make me” and hisoka??? thank you

hehe this is for the 🦋🦋 event! congrats on 200 bb!! so, i saw attack on titan on your list and i'm experiencing a severe lack of my best boy marco 🥺🥺 if you don't write for him that's fine hehe, but if you do, could i please maybe get a lil scenario where marco helps the reader out with her training and then they accidentally confess their feelings and it's just rlly fluffy and cute? 🥺 i need marco being happy in my life rn sbdjdhdjr 💓💓

“If you keep biting your lip like that, I’m holding you accountable for my actions.” for Kakashi please! I love him 🤤

If your requests are still open, can i ask for some domestic kakashi fluff? Ty

Hi mommas❤️❤️ CAN I PWEASE request some Guren (seraph of the end) relationship headcanons ? Not nsfw but maybe a little steamy 🥺🥰 I LOVE UU -🍒

Hi Chloe 🥰 Can I have some spicy nsfw headcanons for Yami where his s/o is acting really bratty during sex and he puts her in her place? 😪😂😊

Kageyama wirh Oikawas sister reader? there just chillin Nd stuff and toru comes over and picks y/n up and they hug and kageyama is like “eXcuSe mE???” forgive my spelling im on mobile lmao

Hiii❤️❤️ Can I request an imagine where you live in a small town and work at a cafe and Bakugou is your cliche small town boyfriend? Or headcanons! The idea is so cute and I love your writing 😊

okay so uHHHHH you can just go for Mephisto sharing some food with his s/o owo;; take your time on it too because i know it's gonna be really great either way!

A reader insert saved by vampire! main YYH crew from a pack of werewolves

Since you said requests are open maybe.. suga subbing for you? Idk he's just always appeared like someone who would love to please you in anyway possible.

V A M P I R E LAVI!!! DO IT GIRL!! 👌👌♥️♥️♥️

Fake dating with Lavi!!!!! Need more of the DGM boyz!! 😂

can I get an itachi x reader fic where it's itachi's birthday and the reader decides to give him a special night (👀), wearing lingerie, lighting candles, etc. for him to come home to? I love your work (and you!!) sm btw 🥺💞 - nina!! (@kunoichihatake)

hello ✨💕 it’s me, ryn 😘 if it’s okay, can i request a nishinoya x female!reader? perhaps a first date at the boardwalk with like the rides and carnival stuff? then at the end of the date he kisses her and it turns out the karasuno squad was following them the whole night hehe?

Hi! Can I request a prompt of some soft Kakashi, maybe some cuddles, perhaps it gets a little heated... a lil' Nsfw never hurt nobody👀👅 Thank you so muuch!~😍❤️

If I had kakashi in front of me I would tell him “aren’t you tired of being the most handsome man here?”

Hi! I saw that requests were open for the Haikyuu!! boys so here I am! I was wondering if I could request a Tsukki x reader where Tsukki has a crush on the reader but doesn't know how to express his feelings other then throwing insults. it can be angsty or fluffy I just really love Tsukki as a tsundere lol. (also btw I LOVE your theme and blog aesthetic its very pretty!)

Hey wifey😚 so Ichigo has stolen my heartttt can I get the strawberry boy with an S/O who gets super shy with with physical contact? Tyy💗💗

Fake dating with Lavi!!!!! Need more of the DGM boyz!! 😂

NSFW Vampire Squall (FF8) for very obvious reasons because UUUUUUGH

Hello there miss, my name is kandaxxx. Nice to meet you since I have definitely never requested from you before and this is definitely my first time and i am definitely not taking advantage of your bomb writing skills to ask you to write a “Choke me, daddy.” for Seymour from FF (love you forever and always!!!!!!)

hey butterfly 🥺 can you please write a story where the reader and (any character) are fighting and it turns out it was just about something stupid? like chicken nuggets? thank you 🥺💗

Eek! DGM! I was wondering if you would do a request for a general Allen Walker relationship HC? I don’t see him on the character list, but I’m just curious *bows* Thankyou senpai!

Spin The Bottle with any of the DGM characters that you're comfortable writing????? (but like obviously when Kanda spins the bottle it has to land on the reader [me] because YOU KNOW WHY OK????????) ilysm!!! 😍

I’m thinking a smut scenario of some kind that uses the prompts “Perhaps I need to remind you of your place.” and “Let me show you what happens to little brats who don’t follow the rules.” I feel like those are very Nozel Silva things to say. 😈 -bakubabes-hatake

Omfg HI mommy, Can i request really fluffy and soft itachi after he comes back from a mission? Non-massacre AU and you’re on the same team as sasuke lolol thirsty for them age gaps ❤️ thank youuuu ily -🍒

Can I get a fake dating with Kand--Roy Mustang (hahahaha) 👉👈🥺

Is this okay to ask for? Egor taking care of s/o who has period cramps... Ty!

can I get an itachi x reader fic where it's itachi's birthday and the reader decides to give him a special night (👀), wearing lingerie, lighting candles, etc. for him to come home to? I love your work (and you!!) sm btw 🥺💞 - nina!! (@kunoichihatake)

Hello! Can I please request some headcanons for Kiba with a S/O with a praise kink? And for Shikamaru with a S/O with a choking kink? Thank you so much.

Wow. Here is me putting in a request. Shocker, right?? 😂 I want some Greed, baby 😈 as for the prompt, it's not in your list, but could you maybe do something based off of "Oh my god. Did we just break the bed?" ???? 👉👈

It's a shame u only have one ling request, so could I request some Ling x Reader where they're both absolutely oblivious until Lan Fan or Ed or someone finally just tells them for them? Sorry if I didn't make any sense ❤️❤️

ok idk if you write threesomes but 😳😳 if you could write one with daichi and suga n maybe some dp, i'd probably die 🥺💓 only if you're comfortable with that tho ♡

Tyki flirting with his crush in his native language of Portuguese? I really love your work and please have some candy 🍬🍭🍫

hi butterfly! 🥰 i hope you're doing well! you already know what i'm going to ask you for — a request! i just feel really down in the dumps lately. can i request headcanons for an s/o that takes graduation pictures on their grandmother's 3 year death anniversary with kenma, nishinoya & kuroo? i hope you can do my request! you don't have to do it if you don't want to!

hehehe kuroo, tsukki and kageyama headcanons of their s/o sending them a nude while they at training and them making an excuse to get home and fUcK yOu SeNsELeSs - 🌊

Hello may I request itachi x reader. People learned the truth and he can finally return to his wife and children in the village 🥺 and they don’t have to be in secret anymore

holy shit,, i am starved for the squall content,,, if you don't mind, catching you wearing their clothes?

S/O walking in on kakashi masturbating? 👉👈 💕

[chickensarentcheap]

Sanctuary- Chapter 9

WARNINGS: language and smut. NSFW.

Tagging: @alievans007, @valkyrie-of-the-light, @c-a-v-a-l-r-y, @innerpaperexpertcloud

She straddles his lower back as he lays on his stomach in the middle of their bed; her fingers pressing into the tight and aching muscles in his right shoulder.  The pain is moderate to severe tonight. A dull ache that starts in the base of his neck and travels the entire length of his arm, throbbing in the elbow and pins and needles in the fingers.  Scar tissue from the various surgeries he’d needed after Dhaka wrapping and twisting around ligaments and nerves and causing on going issues. The worst is his right shoulder; a reconstructive surgery to piece everything back together repeated shoulder separations had led to increased mobility issues. The scar running over both the front and back deltoid muscles and along the top of his shoulder to the nape of his neck. Surgeons had been able to save and improve mobility but had warned that there’d be permanent and progressive consequences, tightening and shortening of muscles and ligaments, bursitis, arthritis. The list went on. Long term physio, massage, drugs. Umpteen things prescribed or suggested that made him feel a hell of a lot older than his forty years.

“Ovi wants to bring that girl over tomorrow,” Esme says, as she uses both thumbs to get into that tough spot right under his shoulder blade.

In the last five years she’s grown accustomed to every inch of his body; whether it be providing relief for therapy for painful joints in muscles or when they made love. Those fingers acquainting themselves with every muscle, memorizing the way they twisted and bulged, how they moved under her touch.  She knew every spot that either ached or turn him on, able to intricately trace the outline of every tattoo and scar. There was a time where the memories those scars held were too painful to relive; she couldn’t see them, let alone touch them, without being reminded of the horrific events in Dhaka. Now the trauma had subsided, and she no longer had to look away or pull her hands back.  The events were still fresh in her mind, but she was able to block them out. There was something bittersweet about those scars now. The ones that he’d gained while in Dhaka. A reminder of how she’d almost lost him but how he’d fought back and they’d both been given a second chance.

“Why?” Tyler asks, both forearms under the pillow his cheek rests against.

“I guess he thinks this is going to be something long term and serious and he wants us to meet her. He seems pretty crazy about her. I don’t remember him being this bad over any of the girls he dated in high school.”

“I wonder if he’s going to cough up his V card sooner rather than later.”

“You have an unsettling obsession with his virginity,” she teases, and he turns his face into the middle and lets loose a string of profanity when she gets up under the shoulder blade and presses a hard as she can. His entire body going rigid; toes digging into the mattress. “And no,” she says, as she releases the pressure. “That was not meant as punishment for said virginity obsession.”

“It’s not an obsession,” he lifts his head from the pillow and removes one arm from under it, resting his chin on it.  A pained grimace on his face, sweat beading across his forehead and gathering at his hairline and temples. “I’m just curious. She’s an older woman, he’s a virgin. He’s lucky when you think about it. She’s probably got all kinds of experience.”

“Or she could be relatively inexperienced like I was when we first met.”

“The things you knew how to do and you were comfortable letting me do? You weren’t that inexperienced.”

“You are the third and the last. Three guys? That’s not a lot.”

“Well the other two must have been really good teachers. I should send them thank you cards. Fuck,” he groans, as she runs her knuckles along the entire length of his right shoulder blade. “You’re savage for a little thing.”

“How do you know it wasn’t you who the good teacher?” she suggests. “I mean, there wasn’t else much to do for those five days and you are blessed with an incredible amount of patience and stamina. How do you know I didn’t just let you do all the work and show me how things are done?”

“Because I was there and I know that isn’t true. There were things you knew and that you did willingly and I never even had to say a word.”

“Maybe you’re just so hot I said ‘fuck it. I’ll let him do whatever he wants’.”

“Well, you did let me go where no other man has ever gone before. After only three days. So…”

“You really are a fifteen-year-old with raging hormones stuck in a grown man’s body,” she chides. “So you think he will? Cough it up to this girl?”

“I wouldn’t blame him if he did. What guy wouldn’t take it if it’s right there staring him in the face? I don’t know why we have to meet her though. Can’t he just fuck her and leave us out of it?”

“I don’t think this is strictly a having someone to fuck situation. I think he’s actually really into her. Haven’t you noticed the way his entire face lights up when he talks about her?”  Her fingers and thumbs move up to the top of his shoulder, firmly pressing along the scar.

“You honestly don’t think I pay attention to that kind of shit do you? I’m a guy. Guys do not pay attention to that kind of stuff.”

“He’s totally crazy about her. It’s so obvious. Pay attention next time. I’ll ask about her tomorrow at breakfast. Just watch how he reacts. What he does with his face. You do it sometimes too. When you look at me.”

“Am I drunk when I do it?”

“I’m going to seriously smother in you sleep. Don’t be such a smart ass. I know you hate talking about feelings and all that sappy stuff. But I know you feel that stuff. You don’t have to admit it, baby. I know you better than you know yourself sometimes.”

It’s true. There were times she could just look at him and know what he was thinking or feelings. Easily finishing his sentences. Or giving words to the thoughts in his mind that he couldn’t find an adequate way to express.

“I still don’t understand why we have to meet her,” he says, forehead against the pillow, teeth digging into his bottom lip as she narrows in on the troublesome spot on the base of his neck.

“Because he wants us to. Because we’re his family and he wants her to meet his family.”

“It’s going be weird explaining all of that. I hope he’s not going to throw me under the bus and leave it to me to answer her questions.”

“Just tell her what we’ve told everyone else who asks,” her hands move down onto his spine, pressing into each vertebra.  “His parents were friends of ours who died in a car accident and we were named his guardians in their will.”

“That story isn’t going to hold up forever. One day or another, the truth will come out. It always does.”

‘Well don’t let her be the one you tell it to. The last thing we need is to traumatize her and have her sue us for emotional pain and suffering. Can you imagine hearing a story like that? It sounds screwed up to me and I lived it. Imagine how messed up it would be to her? We’ll just have a nice quiet dinner like a normal family.”

“Like we’re normal. Have you met our kids?”

“Good point. Your spawns do have a tendency to get a little rowdy.”

“My spawns,” he snorts.  “Because I’m the only one responsible for why they’re here.”

“You had your five minutes of fun, didn’t you?”

“You and I have very different experiences of the times our kids were conceived. Were you even in the room when it happened? Because five minutes? Times that by like twenty.”

“Oh, you wish! You may have the stamina of a God but that’s even too much for you. I love you and you’re a great fuck, but let’s be realistic.”

“Better than your ex?”

She laughs. “You’ve been wondering that all day, haven’t you?”

“Not all day but…” he closes his eyes and inhales sharply when she finally reaches the tailbone. Applying pressure as her hands move across the small of his back and over to his hips. “…I did think about it.”

“I can’t believe you’d even think it was a valid question. You are way at the head of the line on the best lover list. Second place is way back there. And it isn’t him, so…” she leans sideways to grab the bottle of pain relief cream lying on the mattress beside him. Grimacing when she opens the lid and sniffs. “…do I seriously have to sleep in the same room as you tonight? How offended would you be if I told you to sleep on the couch?”

“Very fucking offended.”

“This is not a smell I want next to me all night,” she holds the bottle up to his nose, and he coughs and gags. “Almost as bad as that sewer back in Dhaka.”

“Nothing will ever be as bad as that sewer back in Dhaka. But that does smell like shit. Just leave it.”

“The doctor said it’s the best one to use.”

“Who cares. I’ll put it on after you fall asleep. Then I’ll put a clothespin over your nose so you won’t wake up when the smell hits you.”

“You’re very stubborn,” she says.

“You tell me that every day at least five times a day. And that’s every day for the last five years.”

“So then stop being an enormous pain in my ass.”

“Never,” he declares. “Get up for a second.”

She pushes herself up onto her knees, allowing him to roll onto his back. “You okay?” she asks, noticing the grimace on his face.

“Fine. I’m fine,” he places his hands on her hips and settles her back down on his stomach. “Thank you, babe. That feels a lot better.”

“I don’t ever want to hear you say I never do anything nice for you,” she teases, as she leans down to kiss him and then settles her face in between his neck and his shoulder.  A hand coming up to comb through the longer strands of his hair as he wraps both arms around her.  

“So you’re being serious?” he asks after several minutes. “About this list of yours?”

“You can not be serious right now.”

“I’m just curious. You said you had a list and that I was first on it.”

“Are you honestly self conscious over my ex? Really? You of all people? You’re the last guy I’d ever expect that from.”

“I’m not being self conscious. I’m just curious.”

“Baby, you are at the top of every list I’ve had since I was sixteen and I first started dating.”

“Are these lists written down somewhere or…”

“Tyler…seriously…” she laughs against the side of his throat. “…you have absolutely nothing to be self conscious about. You are in an entirely different league than my ex in every possible way.  It’s the man versus the boys. Let’s leave it at that. There isn’t any other man like you out there. I promise.”

That answer seems to satisfy him, and he drops a kiss on the top of her head.

‘What about your lists?” she inquires.

“I don’t have lists. I don’t do weird shit like that.”

“It doesn’t mean you don’t keep mental notes. Where would I be on your list?”

“I already told you. You give the best head I’ve ever had. I would have travelled from Australia to Colorado just for that.”

“What about the other stuff?”

“What other stuff?”

She sighs in exasperation.

“What do you want me to say? That you’re the best I’ve ever had and I’ve totally forgotten about every other woman that came before you?”

“I swear to God if you put me at the bottom of the list…”

Tyler laughs, and wrapping an arm around her waist, sits up and effortlessly tosses her down onto her back. “There is no list. I don’t think about things like that. I just know that you give the best head I’ve ever had and sex with you is incredible. Every time. I don’t compare it to other people. Why do I need to? None of them matter any more.”

“You’re being very diplomatic about this,” she frowns, but then sighs when his lips find the side of her neck.

His beard is rough against her skin, his breath warm, lips and tongue moist as they travel along her jaw and move up to her ear. His hand heavy on her stomach; pushing up the bottom of her simple tank top to expose an inch of flesh, fingertips gliding across her skin. And she shivers when the tip of his tongue traces the outer edge of her ear and his teeth gently sink into the lobe.

“What about Nik?” she asks.

“Who’s Nik?”

“I’m being serious,” she grabs a hold of his hair and yanks his head back, so he’s looking at her. “What about her? Am I at least better than her?”

“Who am I married to?”

“You had a chance to marry her? What…?”

“Stop…” he kisses her, chuckling against her lips. “…there is no one else but you. No one else I ever think about.   There’s no one else I want other than you. So please…” he resumes the teasing and the torturing on her ear and her neck. “…stop…”

She opens her mouth to speak, then clamps it shut when his fingers make short work of the small bow holding tight the waist band of her bottoms. His mouth covering hers in a deep, hungry kiss as his hand slides down the front of her pyjama pants and dips between her legs. One hand in his hair and the other tightly gripping his shoulder as his tongue pushing its way past her teeth and seeking out hers. The kiss is desperate. Hungry. Needy. And she cries out into his mouth when he slips two fingers inside of her.

“Are you going to stop asking me questions now?” he asks, as he pulls back to study her face. Her pupils wide, her face flushed, hair falling across her forehead. “No more questions?”

She shakes her head, then lifts her head to kiss him.  She curls an arm around his neck and pulls him into her; his free hand moving to support his weight, palm down on the mattress.  Arching her back and pressing her hips flush against his palm as his fingers move inside of her. Slow, deep strokes that has all of her nerve endings on fire.  

A smile tugs at the corner of his mouth as he watches her. The way her eyes darken and her breathing picks up pace; hips rising and falling to match every move that his fingers make.  Bringing his thumb in contact with her clit, softly rubbing at the hardened nub until she’s got a hold of his hair once again and she’s yanking him down into another kiss. Effectively muffling the noises that come tumbling out of her mouth.

He continues to kiss her; soft, gentle pecks interspersed with longer moments of closed mouth upon closed mouth. Waiting until her body stops shuddering and her breath returns to normal before removing his hand between her legs. Eyes locked on hers as he licks her fluid off of his fingers.

“You’re evil,” she declares.

“In the best possible ways, yeah?”

She nods and reaches for him, a hand cupping his erection through his boxer briefs. Long and hot and hard underneath that cool, smooth cotton. The tip of her tongue sliding along her lower lip as she strokes him through the fabric, her grip tight, applying just the right amount of pressure. Until he’s swallowing noisily and his own breathing picks up his pace.  Frowning when he suddenly pushes her hand away and then leans across the bed to grab a condom from the nightstand.

“No,” she says, as she takes hold of his wrist.  “Don’t. Let’s have a baby, Tyler. One more.”

“You’re sure?”

She nods. “But I swear to God, if your super sperm does something crazy like another set of twins or worse, triplets, you won’t have to worry about a vasectomy because I will use a kitchen knife to cut your dick off myself. You’re a little too good at making babies.”

“Maybe,” he grins, as he sits back on his heels and grabbing a hold of her hips, pulls her towards him. “But they’re beautiful babies.”

She smiles. “They are. We did good, didn’t we.”

“Yeah. We did. We did real good.”

“Maybe the last one will be a girl,” she muses. “There’s way too much testosterone in this house.”

“Maybe,” he says, and hooks his fingers in the waist band over her pants and yanks them down in one swift movement.  Batting her foot out of the way when she presses it against his crotch, toes rubbing against his cock. Placing a hand on either side of her head as he leans down to kiss her, capturing her bottom lip between his teeth before pushing his tongue into her mouth.

Her hands reach for the elastic band on his shorts and she hastily pushes them down over his hips and his ass. And he never breaks the kiss as one hand reaches behind him to shove the fabric down past his knees. Feeling her shudder against him and gasp into his mouth when he slips inside of her; groaning deep in his throat as he bottoms out inside of her.

“Fuck…” he breathes, forehead resting against hers. “…you feel so good. You always feel so good.”

She raises her head to kiss him; a brief peck on the lips before her mouth moves across his jaw and down onto his throat. Tongue travelling over the scar that serves as a permanent memory of when he’d nearly lost his life. Hands sliding across his shoulders and down onto his back, nails pressing into his flesh and breaking the skin as he moves inside of her. Long, smooth strokes that fill her completely.

No other man has ever been able to do the things he does. Or make her feel the way he can.  The way he looks down at her with so much love and adoration in his eyes. The way each movement and each kiss lets her know just how worshipped she really is. His gaze never wavering; those blue eyes locked on hers, as if they’re burrowing into her very soul.

“I love you,” she breathes. “I love you so much.”

“I know,” he smiles. “I love you too.”

“Put a baby in me, Tyler. Put your baby in me.”

He blinks at both the honesty and power that comes with those words.  And then it is as if every last shred of patience and resolve shatters. Slow love making turning frantic and aggressive, those large hands flipping her over onto her stomach and forcing her up onto her knees, slamming into her with brutal force. One hand on her hip and the other gripping the headboard as he furiously pounds into her. Surprised at how well she has always taken him. Even five years ago in that dirty Dhaka hotel room when he’d lost complete and utter control for the first time.

He reaches around to find her clit; stroking it as he drives into her again and again until she’s burying her face into a pillow to muffle her cries, his name repeatedly leaving her lips.

“Tell me when you’re going to come,” he says, as he drops his hand from the headboard and grabs her hair, yanking her head back, lips feasting on her neck. “Tell me.”

“I’m close…” she manages between ragged gasps. “…so close…”

He pulls her to her knees, so her back is pressed against his front; her hands reaching back to grab at his hair.

“Tell me,” he growls, and increases the pressure of his fingers. “Tell me.”

“Tyler…” she can barely get his name out. “…fuck…Tyler…”

“I want you to come,” he orders, and then removes his hand from between her legs and reaches between them to slip two fingers up her ass.

That’s all it takes. Her head falling back against him, his free hand clamping down over her mouth in order to hide the scream; sis name, profanities, unintelligible nonsense he can’t even begin to comprehend. And with two hard, strong stroke he’s coming as well; a long, loud groan erupting from somewhere deep inside his chest. And he wraps his arm around her waist to hold her painfully tight against him; making sure that not one drop of his cum manages to trickle out of her.

His trembling legs give out; vision white as he collapses onto his back, chest heaving as he attempts to regain some control over his senses. And he feels her move against him; the soft brush of her skin against his, her lips pressing a series of kisses across his chest and collarbone. Blindly he reaches for her, a hand falling on the back of her neck and bringing her head down to his shoulder.

They lay like that. Cool breeze tumbling through the window and washing over their spent and sweaty bodies. Until she shivers against him and he sits up and reaches for the comforter at the end of the bed. Draping it over both of them as he once more gathers her in his arms and pulls her tight against him.

 ****

He awakens to tiny hands incessantly shaking him. Torn out of a dead sleep by the sensation of someone clutching him by the bicep and yanking his arm back and forth with as much strength as a little body will muster. He’d been dreaming about Dhaka; a confusing mash up of all five days. From those moments in the dirty hotel room where greedy, hungry hands tore at clothes, to the early morning hours when he’d dropped her off at the extraction point before heading to meet with Ovi’s captors, to when they’d hid out in the sewer and eventually found themselves rescued by Gaspar and brought to his house. The betrayal of one of his oldest friends. Ovi taking the man’s life.

It was all mixed together. His brain unable to make any sense of it. And he’d just been about to set foot on that bridge when he’d been startled out of his sleep. It was a relief; he hasn’t had a dream about Dhaka in nearly four years and it isn’t exactly a time in his life that he wants to visit. But the anxiety and nerves he’d felt even in the dream had been vivid; his heart hammers in his chest and sweat gathers at his temples and across his brow. He almost snaps; stuck in that hazy space between sleep and consciousness. When your body isn’t fully awake, but your nerves are firing on all cylinders. It is fight of flight at that point, and his system chooses fight; ready to reach out and grab hold of what his brain is telling him is a threat when that little voice manages to break through.

“Daddy…” a pitiful pleading, accompanied by more shaking. “Daddy…wake up…please wake up…”

His daughter stands at the side of the bed. Even in the moonlight he can see the tears that stream down her face. The way she struggles to draw in a breath.

“Millie…” he pushes himself up onto his elbow and reaches up to push her hair away from her face.  “…what’s going on? What’s wrong?”

“I had a bad dream.  I was really scared. I made a mess. In my bed.”

She’d gone through a stage of horrible nightmares the first time he’d returned home from the job with a broken wrist, split lip, and busted nose.  The bruises and the injuries had terrified her and had set off months of trauma and sleepless nights for everyone. And he’d spent weeks either curled up beside her in that tiny single bed or sleeping on the floor right next to it.

“It’s okay,” he swings his legs over the side of the bed, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes and checking the time on his cell phone that sits charging on the nightstand. 2:33 am.  He’s groggy; a side effect of the pain medication that he’d taken only two hours before.  It had been the first sleep disturbance of the night; the deep-rooted pain that starts in his shoulder and just seems to spread from head to toe. “Let’s go,” he stands, thankfully that he’d had the right mind to actually put on a pair of shorts before going back to bed. “I’ll get you cleaned up.”

Sniffling noisily, she curls her entire hand around two of his fingers as they head out of the room.

He gives her a quick bath, a fresh change of pyjamas and then takes her downstairs with him to throw the dirty laundry in the wash.  Not asking any questions; knowing from experience that when she’s ready to tell him about the dream, she will. Instead he makes her a bowl of oatmeal- her favourite comfort food- and they sit in the dark living room with the tv on but the volume on mute. And when she’s placated and calm once again, she tucks herself under his arm and cuddles into him; head against his ribs, a hand resting on his stomach.  And he’s contemplating whether to pick her up and carry her upstairs or if they should just stay where they are when she finally speaks.

“I’m sorry, daddy.”

“For what?”

“For making a mess in my bed.”

“It’s okay,” he assures her, and drops a kiss on the top of her head. “We got it all cleaned up. No worries. Things happen.”

“It was a scary dream,” she sounds as if she may cry again, and he tightens his hold on her. “Really, really, really scary.”

“What was it about? Do you remember?”

“It was about you. You went away. Only this time you didn’t come back,” the tears start again, her entire body shaking with the force of them. And he picks her up and settles her against his chest; her stomach pressed against him, her head on his shoulder, both of her arms circling his neck.

“It’s okay,” he nuzzles her forehead with his nose, rubs her back in slow, smooth circles. “It was just a dream. Just a bad dream.”

“The bad guys got to you and they hurt you and you never came home,” she continues through her sobs. “And mommy was crying really bad. She was so sad because she missed you so much. And I cried too. I cried a lot.”

“Shhh,” he strokes her hair. “It’s okay. Try to calm down, okay? It was just a bad dream. I’m right here. I’m right here and I’m fine.”

“What if the bad guys come after you? What if they come here to find you?”

“Millie, what bad guys? What are you talking about? What…?”

“I know what your job is, daddy. I know that you go and help people. That you get them away from bad guys.”

He frowns. “Who told you that? Was it mommy?”  

“No,” she sniffles. “It was Ovi. I asked him what your job was, and he says that you rescue people. From bad guys.”

Tyler sighs heavily. And makes a mental note to kick the kid’s ass.

“What if they come here? I don’t want the bad guys coming here.”

“They won’t,” he promises. “The bad guys don’t know where I am. I always make sure of that. I always make sure they have no idea who I am or where I live. So they can’t find me. So they can’t find you and your brothers and your mommy. No one is going to come here.”

“You promise?”

“I promise.  And when have I ever broken a promise to you?”

“Never.”

“Everything’s fine. There are no bad guys coming to find me. You guys are safe, okay? There’s nothing to worry about. Are you ready to go back upstairs?”

“Can I sleep with you and mommy? In the big bed?”

“Are you going to snore and hog all the covers?”

“No,” she giggles, and tightens her hold around his neck as he stands up, an arm across the small of her back to keep her in place. “You’re strong, daddy,” she says, as he climbs the stairs, floorboards creaking noisily on under his feet.  “You’ve got big muscles.”

“It’s why your mom married me. The big muscles. And because I’m tall and I can reach the things on the high shelves.”

“I’m going to get married one day. And have twelve kids.”

He scowls. “I think I just aged fifteen years hearing you say that.”

Mac lifts his head as they step into the room. Ears back, eyes wide. Tail wagging when he sees his favourite little human.

“Cuddle up to mommy,” Tyler says, as he places his daughter in the bed. “Don’t wake her up. Just cuddle up to her.”

Millie does as she’s told, pushing herself across the bed and burying her face into her mother’s back.

He climbs in next to her, covering them both with the thick duvet and lying down on his side; arm stretched across both of them, his hand resting on his wife’s hip.

She stirs.  Her voice barely above a whisper. “Tyler? Is everything okay? What…?”

“Millie had a bad dream,” he explains. “She’s here with us.”

“A bad dream? What? She hasn’t had one of those in forever.”

“Go back to sleep. She’s fine. It just scared the hell out of her. Try to go back to sleep,” he settles his cheek against his pillow and rubs her hip in slow, smooth circles. Until her breathing settles and evens out and he’s pretty sure she’s nodded off again.

And no matter how hard he tries, he can’t follow suit. Awake and on alert until the sun begins poking over the horizon.

[bubblegumstardust]

i havent bombarded you with questions in a long ass time so here i am (feel free to skip some if its too much): 1, 3, 4, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15 (i know you probably won’t even have to google), 16, 17, 18, 24, 27, 29, 33, 36, 41, 47, 51, 58, 59, 61, 66, 71, 74, 75, 76, 79, 80, 90, 95 and finally 100🥰🥰

Dear God Chelle 😂😂💕💕

So sorry this is so long but I can't do read more on mobile

1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk?

I try to have more cereal generally but I just chuck milk in randomly and if it ends up being more then it ends up being more 🤷‍♀️

3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books?

I generally just use an actual bookmark, but some things I've used in a pinch are: receipts, a pen, sunglasses, some mail, another book, debit card, a hairband, my purse

4: how do you take your coffee/tea?

I don't drink coffee and I just have a teaspoon or 2 of sugar in my tea

7: do you name your plants?

Yep, I have 2 in my room called Ellie and Nyah. I even named their pots because they're cute and shaped like a sheep and a hippo! The pots are called Pippa and Mimi and they're girlfriends

8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings?

Generally writing I guess. I do a lot of painting/drawing too but that's less feeling expression and more just fun.

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself?

Yep, and I'm probably very annoying to share space with because I do it a lot

10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach?

On my side and I have to switch like every 10 minutes when I'm trying to sleep or I get uncomfortable

11: what’s an inner joke you have with your friends?

Literally cannot think off the top of my head. @wonderfilledness, remind me please. Also Chelle tell me any of ours I might have forgotten.

12: what’s your favorite planet?

In our solar system, Pluto because fuck science, it's a planet! Other than that there's a planet I can't remember the name of that, because of rotation speeds, always has the same side facing the sun so like most of the planet is uninhabitable except a thin strip on either side between the two

13: what’s something that made you smile today?

The pup. Also I was helping my mum make masks and I completely fucked up and it was really funny

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like?

Ngl it would be a mess. Also probably covered in books and art stuff and it'd probably be light and airy with lots of plants and cute pastel colours

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is!

Oh where to begin! Okay so for one NASA had to design a special pen for use in space because due to the lack of gravity, normal pens don't work. Any liquid in space will form itself into a sphere due to surface tension. Sunsets on Mars are blue. There's a planet where it's constantly raining glass sideways because wind speeds are so high. There's a (I think) dwarf planet in our solar system that they nicknamed The Goblin. Planet 9 is something we can observe exists but no one can find it and it might not be a planet at all. It could be a black hole or something. The moon is slowly drifting away. I'm gonna stop here but I could go on for ages.

16: what’s your favorite pasta dish?

Fucken love a good spaghetti bolognese

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair?

Kinda want it pastel pink or purple again but also really wanna dye it like a deep turquoise colour

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up.

Excuse me how dare you assume I've done anything dumb! Tbh I definitely have but again my memory is really bad for stuff like this so I'm gonna turn to @wonderfilledness and @mooncloudsea for this again

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets?

Tbh, you Chelle. Also I'd definitely trust Alice with them but it's somehow easier to tell you because admiting stuff face to face is horrible and I can only talk to you online really

27: what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor?

I don't like gum

29: what’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing?

Everything all you guys do is cute 😘💕

33: what’s your fave pastry?

C r o i s s a n t s

36: which band’s sound would fit your mood right now?

Hmmm. I don't know what my mood is right now so like idk?

41: what’s the last book you remember really, really loving?

I mean I'm pretty sure the last book I actually read was Aurora Burning so I gotta say that

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe?

Well there's plenty of foods I don't like but I'm not sure I'd ban any of them because there's always people who do like them.

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them?

Okay it makes no sense but I always think of Alice when I here B0$$ by Fifth Harmony because it's one of the songs we always end up screaming along to in the car

58: who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why?

I feel like Alice is a vodka aunt and maybe I'm the wine mum?

59: what’s your favorite myth?

Idk actually. I quite like the echo myth though

61: what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received?

Honestly I have no idea 😂

66: what would your ideal flower crown look like?

Small little delicate one with lots of small cute flowers like daisies and other pink white and purple ones. Also it would be full of forget me nots because they're my favourite flowers.

71: what’s your favorite kind of tea?

Peppermint all the way

74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns.

They have short brown hair and give some of the best hugs. They're a couple inches taller than me and will not let me forget it. They also steal all my old clothes and would probably steal my dog if given the chance. They need to learn to fucken drive already and it's been too long since I last saw them

75: tell us about your pets!

He babey. He also a little shit but I adore him

76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t?

So many things. Probably most importantly, applying for uni

79: what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you?

Lol no one likes me enough to do something cute for me

80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why?

Light purple. I chose it when we first moved here but painted it even lighter a couple years in

90: talk about your one of you favorite cities.

I'm generally not the biggest fan of cities but I actually really loved living in Nottingham. It was super developed and you had like everything you could need and want there but also really kept its historic feel and it never felt so overcrowded like places like London do and idk, it was just a really nice place to live

95: what are your plans for this weekend?

I don't really have any in particular. Probably do some more art and writing and stuff but idk really

100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why?

I usually pick future no question but like I'm a little concerned as to what such a near future will actually look like. Maybe the past so I can redo some stuff and make a few better life decisions and get help for my mental health sooner and also maybe find a way to do something to prevent some of the awful things happening right now

[melonkooky]

bts reaction - hearing their s/o sing for the first time

requested

genre: only fluff

author’s note: this reaction is when bts hears their s/o sing for the first time and think they sound amazing, after they claim that they’re a bad singer. (also, ignore all my mistakes lol). also, i’m using an old laptop (because my mom took possession of the family computer) and so if my posts look weird (like on mobile things sometimes don’t show up as bolded or italicized), it’s not my fault. i’m annoyed by it...

please do not copy my work. but please like and reblog it. thank you!!!!

kim seokjin

seokjin had just gotten home from practice. he was practically drowning in his sweat, and his limbs were heavy and pounding to the rhythm of his racing heart. he just wanted a hot bath to relieve the stress of his muscles. as he approached the bathroom, however, he heard something. your singing, music to his ears. you were actually really good. seokjin couldn’t help to press his ear to the door to hear you better as you sang epiphany with everything you had. you didn’t know he was home, so you were singing quite loudly, enjoying the echo of the bathroom. you were self-conscious of your singing, but sometimes you couldn’t help yourself. seokjin couldn’t fight the grin on his face, the light blush in his cheeks. you sounded amazing, and he could recall all the times he had tried to get you to sing a duet with him just for fun. he went into the bedroom, sitting on the foot of the bed right next to the door and waited for you, listening to your angelic voice.

minutes later, the water stopped. soon after you stepped out of the bathroom. you were just wrapped in a towel, as you hadn’t expected anyone to be home. you screamed when you saw seokjin sitting on the bed, a smug expression on his face. “seokjin! when did you get home?”

he hummed. “not long. but i was here long enough to enjoy the little concert you had in there though.”

your cheeks flushed. “you heard all that?”

he nodded. “and it was beautiful.”

min yoongi

yoongi had been in his home studio majority of the day. despite being on his two month break, he couldn’t get himself to sit still and do nothing. besides, they were already beginning to work on the new album. while he was there, you didn’t want to bother him. he seemed busy. although you wanted to spend time with him, you were the lovely significant other who respected the space of your lover. so instead you opted to clean the entire house. it had been many months since you had actually cleaned, like deep clean. you got into old clothes and got out all the supplies. you were going to dust, to clean, to mop, to vacuum as much as you could. while doing so, you had your headphones in, banging your head along to the songs.

an hour later, yoongi was hungry, and went to find you to ask if you wanted to go out for lunch. instead, he found you dancing while you mopped the kitchen floor. your back was to him, so you didn’t notice him. you were singing so far away, and yoongi’s ears had been blessed. he never believed you when you told him your voice was terrible, and now he was listening to your heavenly voice. he smiled widely.

when you finally turned around, you saw yoongi and immediately stopped, taking off the headphones. “yoongi!” your cheeks turned a dark red in embarrassment.

“don’t feel embarrassed. you sounded amazing.”

you couldn’t help but smile. “r-really?”

yoongi nodded. “but i’m hungry. let’s get something to eat and then you can continue. you should sing more often.”

jung hoseok

hoseok pried open his eyes, allowing the bright morning sun to help him wake up. he inhaled deeply. that was the best sleep he had ever had. he looked around, enjoying the silence. he was at your shared home. there were no members, no managers. he didn’t need an alarm to wake up to because he was on a two month break. he planned on seeing his family, but he also wanted to spend time with you. speaking of which, you weren’t next to him. 

he got out of bed. he wanted to find you, see what you were up to. he walked out of the bedroom, hearing the familiar sound of a pan sizzling. you were making breakfast. he was about to call out to you, but your angelic voice caused him to stop in his tracks. you were singing your own rendition of daydream, one of your favorite songs of his. and it was beautiful.

hoseok began to gush, not being able to hold back. he burst into the kitchen. he scared you, causing you to drop the spatula in your hand. “jung hoseok!”

he laughed, wrapping his arms around you. “i’m sorry but your voice, it’s beautiful. i don’t understand why you claimed you were a bad singer.”

you blushed, “i’m just self-conscious.”

“well, i think you sound amazing. you should sing more often, just for me at least.” he replied, smiling. you smiled at him, feeling a bit proud of yourself.

kim namjoon

namjoon was sitting in the bedroom, reading a new book that he had bought at a bookstore. he was well halfway into the book. he was already planning on naming this one his favorite when he talked about it with you and the members. 

namjoon soon grew hungry, however, and was forced to put his bookmark into the book and set it down on the bed next to him. he went to find you, perhaps you were already making something judging by the smell that was slowly making its way into the bedroom. he walked out of the bedroom, head towards the kitchen. but that’s when he heard something unusual. you were singing his song, trivia : love. no music was playing, it was just your voice. namjoon was surprised. he had never heard you sing before. you always claimed you were a bad singer. you were wrong.

when you finished, namjoon awkwardly walked into the kitchen. pretending nothing had happened, you smiled and said, “hungry?”

he nodded. “i heard you sing.”

your cheeks reddened. you didn’t say anything.

“you should sing more often. your voice, it’s really beautiful.”

you blushed, a smile forming on your face. “thank you.”

park jimin

you were in the shower when jimin got home. he had been out with the members. they had stopped at an arcade, got some dinner, walked around the city for a while, and jimin was the first to break apart from the group because he wanted to go home to spend the rest of the night with you. he was walking into the bathroom when he heard it...heard you.

you were in the bathroom, but you didn’t close the door all the way. jimin could hear you loud and clear as you sang serendipity, your favorite song because jimin sang it. the meaning behind it was also beautiful. you were singing it really well, the acoustics sounded amazing. jimin couldn’t help but listen. he had a thought, your voice would match his perfectly. imagine: the ultimate power couple releasing a duet together. the fans loved you.

when you finished, you were surprised to find jimin. you played it off. “didn’t expect you to be home yet.”

he shrugged. “i think we should sing together.”

“jimin, you knew i don’t have a good voice.”

he laughed. “that’s a total lie. i just witnessed an angel singing in the shower.”

you blushed. “you heard me?”

“yep, and i think we should release a duet.”

you were conflicted. you were self-conscious of your voice. and while jimin was your boyfriend, he also was an amazing vocalist, an amazing vocalist who was asking you to sing with him. “fine.”

kim taehyung

you were sitting at your desk, doing some (home)work stuff because of your school/job. you had music playing from your laptop. while you were working, spring day came on and you couldn’t help but sing along...loudly. taehyung was sitting in the living room watching a movie. but he was getting tired and wanted to go to bed. you were in the bedroom, as that was where the desk was. he shut off the tv and turned off all the lights, heading towards the bedroom afterward. but through the small crack in the door, he could hear music. only, it was your voice. you were singing along, and it sounded as if you had recorded the song with them. just as you sang, “you know it all, you’re my best friend,” harmonizing with taehyung, he swore he fell in love with you again. he couldn’t help but burst inside, nearly scaring you to death. you immediately stopped singing, feeling embarrassed. “oh my god! y/n, you sounded absolutely amazing. spring day is my favorite song, but you were singing along and it sounded beautiful. i don’t even compare.”

you rolled your eyes. “that’s a lie.”

taehyung looked at you, looked very serious. “i mean it. i want you to sing a song with me.”

you looked at him. “i mean, i was just doing it for fun. i don’t think i’m that good.”

“love, i think you sounded beautifully. give it a try. we can get suga and namjoon’s help, and then you can see if you want to release it or not. we can sing together, and if you don’t like it, it’ll stay unknown. but i think you’ll like it, and want to release it.”

you sighed. “fine.” 

taehyung grinned widely. “tomorrow i’ll call namjoon.”

jeon jungkook

you were cleaning the kitchen after making dinner. you and jungkook had eaten, but jungkook insisted that he had to shower, so you were left cleaning the kitchen by himself. you were salty, but you didn’t say anything. it wasn’t a big deal. besides, he had just come back from a long-ass world tour. he needed lots of rest. while you were washing some dishes, jungkook’s song euphoria randomly popped into your head. it’s what you get for constantly thinking about him. so there you were, hand wrapped in a towel as you dried the inside of a glass, singing euphoria. you didn’t realize that soon you weren’t mumbling, or singing quietly. but you were singing as if you were on a stage. no you didn’t use a spatula or a spoon for a microphone, you still continued to clean.

jungkook was running a hand through his wet hair as he walked into the kitchen, just as you hit the high note. his eyes went wide when your voice didn’t falter at all. it was strong, and beautiful, bringing goosebumps to his arms. when you finished, you needed a glass of water, and that’s when you spotted jungkook, who was in awe. with red cheeks, you stuttered, “o-oh, jungkook.”

you drank your water, embarrassed. but jungkook was grinning. “your voice...it’s...it’s…”

“horrible.”

“amazing. i don’t understand why you call yourself a bad singer.”

you shrugged. jungkook continued, “i’m blown away. i think that sounded beautiful!”

you blushed. “thank you.”

[courage-a-word-of-justice]

Deca-Dence 4 | Maou-jou 2 | Fruits Basket 2 24 (49) | Magatsu 1 | IWGP 2 | Koi to Producer 11 - 12 (FINAL) | HypMic 3

Still chugging away at these summer and spring anime...sorry for the delay...(LOL, that rhymed without me meaning to.)

Also, I’ve been on the fence about whether to keep Golden Kamuy, since almost no one I read the reviews of follows it now and it’s a week’s wait (when accounting for my AniList challenge)...so I’m putting it on pause so I don’t have to suffer later.

Deca-Dence 4

“…who possesses the will to fight.”

…Great. Kurenai is absolutely tethered to Kaburagi in a one-sided love. Just when I thought Natsume had an independent role model to look up to.

Maou-jou 2

Oh, this is from Shonen Sunday? Didn’t know that until now.

“Demon Shroud: A demon with 99 clans. A cloth demon that puts on airs that it won’t be used before it’s finished off, due to its wonderful fabric. It is full of beautiful ghostly power, so its skin is smooth. However, the hero (who commonly uses things he finds in his surroundings) caught one, so now the princess has zeroed in on them. The princess doesn’t need the hands or the head of these demons, so it’s a cycle of killing and taking revenge for them. Their fighting style is squeezing the life out of things.”

Apparently, the teddy is acceptable, LOL.

I like how the window stopped displaying text at one point.

I saw someone with a huge plait in the ED. The queen, maybe…?

I noticed the laughs dropped off significantly in comparison to last time, but it’s still good. I can flex my translation skills even if I can’t laugh at one part.

Fruits Basket 2 24 (49)

…jumping to the 2nd-last episode in a season is pretty unprecendented, but I’m going to watch this for the sake of Jon’s Creator Showcase…then again, I need to finish this anime anyway, so it’s just cutting and changing the order for something I already know the outcomes of.

I used to lose myself in movies so much that I would lose all sense of who I was and would have to “regain the bearings of myself”, so to speak. I would have to reconstruct who I was, even though I technically hadn’t “been broken” and I knew once I did that, it felt different. Like I’d travelled through time and past me would never be the same as present me. That’s why I kind of get what Machi means.

Oh, I didn’t listen to this OP much…probably because I’m emphasising bingeing the spring and summer series I left behind and now that I can skip the ads on most of my anime, I’m leaving behind the anime I’ll be slower on.

The manga was written when there weren’t as many cell phones around, much less smartphones.

Rin’s on bad terms with everyone…

…if I remember the year of the dragon correctly, the last one was 2012, then the one before that is 2000…around the turn of the millennium, huh? Froob is showing its age here, albeit unintentionally.

Now that I’m closer to the Musketeers’ age, I can kind of empathise with their scenes a bit more.

“If I always blame someone or something, I’ll never change.” – True. I realised I’ve been a bit too haughty lately (what with the HypMic anime going on and it being the first thing I could research extensively before the anime’s debut, my feelings are of course reaching fever pitch – combine that with continued COVID lockdown and you get me being all defensive of HypMic, for better or for worse) and so I may have acted like a jerk to someone, but since I only know them online and generally when I try to apologise to people online they don’t see the things I apologise for as things in need of apology, I know the fault lies with me to rein myself in. I guess this means changing yourself is the only way to move forward.

I wonder how Hatori did his doctor training while avoiding hugs from girls who aren’t Sohmas…?

Shigure vs. Gentaro (of HypMic, of course)…a writing competition! That would be fun.

…Crow’s note here makes sense (<- this is why I changed the order). Shigure was clearly asking a question there.

Come to think of it, HypMic and Froob have some similar characters. The stoic doctor is Hatori/Jakurai, the energetic smol one is Momiji/Ramuda, the teasing author is Shigure/Gentaro…that could make for some good fanfic material, really.

Magatsu 1

…that title is an absolute killer, man. Anyways, I’m here for the director, who also worked on Hataraku Maou-sama.

Is this a no guns thing, like IWGP is a no drugs thing?

…this OP has lyrics?! I just hear strange squeaky noises, the kind you hear on some autotuned sogs to make them seem more ominous (I can’t remember if there’s a similar sound in G-Anthem of Y City or Yokohama Walker, but one of the MTC songs has similar noises).

I kinda guessed Leo’s package was the one Schaake and her partner were looking for. I was right.

That CGI (on the truck) is…kinda conspicuous.

These backgrounds are gorgeous.

“The definition of in dubio contra reum is "in doubt, against the accused", meaning that, where there is doubt, the accused in a trial is not given the benefit of that doubt; they are assumed guilty.”

I wonder: how many protagonists start out as absolute wimps, unwilling to fight because they either know or don’t know their own power? It’s a pretty standard introduction for things with fights.

This battle track is nice. I listened to some of the Magatsu music under Masaru Yokoyama’s name on Spotify and it’s pretty cool, but since it’s background music, there’s not a lot of demand to listen to it (from me or anyone else, I don’t think).

Why is there only a single shield if they know the enemy has heavy artillery?

…what the heck is a Zeits? Update: You can see a “Zeits” (or however it’s spelt) in the credits list, suggesting Zeits is a character in this.

I knew this was my last premiere and this might have made or broken my entire watching schedule, but this is just a pretty down-to-earth premiere for a fantasy mobile game. While that cliffhanger compelled me to continue, I don’t think it’s good enough to beat its competition in the long run.

IWGP 2

I know I said Magatsu was my last premiere, but just to be sure, I’m watching this one.

This dance scene is beautifully orchestrated. The fact there’s no music means you focus entirely on the motion.

The OP seems to trade more in colour and spectacle than actual “cool factor”.

…wow, $2.90…? That’s some cheap food.

You know I hate 1st person cam with a passion, right? So…uh…

Eyyyyyyyy…this is basically McDonald’s, curry style.

I think I can almost see Ichiro of HypMic in how the G-Boys seem to mostly be reformed delinquents or actual delinquents.

…yeah, but what’s your name, random messenger guy? Update: We find out later his name is Isogai.

“It’s because I suck at working and communicating.” – Yep, that me.

Ikebukuro licence plate. I still have no idea exactly what places get licence plates in Japan.

There are actually 2 characters before “Hospital”, but no one confirms the reading of those characters…which is probably why they’re omitted.

…oh gosh, if this were a BL, Mitsuki and Masaru would be star-crossed lovers…*sigh*

Maybe it’s an unrelated 3rd party??? (In mysteries, you can never dismiss the work of a 3rd party.)

You can tell exactly which group is which based on the colours they wear. Makoto isn’t affiliated with anyone, so he’s wearing black and had yellow earlier.

I think an anime is cowardly – or trying to save budget – if they deliberately choose an angle where they can’t show the moment of impact clearly.

E! News, LOL.

Archangel, huh? So like a 2nd in command?

I think IWGP is moving in the direction of pushing the gangs against each other in the way Makoto describes in ep. 2.

As for what I think of it now, it's decent if you want something down-to-earth, but it seems to be missing some kind of "wow factor". Like it's afraid to commit to deeper characterisation, even though it has Makoto as the ostensible lead/viewpoint character.

Koi to Producer 11

“Cognitive Science Association” - I thought it was the Cognitive Psychology Association…? (Psychology is shinrigaku, science is kagaku.)

My boy (Lucien)…why must you be so evil??? Why do I keep falling for the tall but mysterious doctor??? (<- guilty as charged re: Jakurai)

…that’s some funky seatbelts.

What’s that look in Victor’s eyes…? Fondness, or something more…?

…ah, so there is “Science” in the place’s name. It was just being less loosely translated then.

Oh dang. Stuff escalated really fast, huh?

You actually set this in 2020, huh, staff? What happens ten years from now and people watch it, only to realise 2020 and 2030 aren’t so different? That’s what happened when people had the Y2K bug.

That yellow sign on the side says “exit”. It’s not of any use.

That’s not a recoloured Kiro, is it? It’s not Shaw, either (who I think we saw somewhere in the previous episodes)…so then who is it?

…geesh, they even changed Helios to Ares. I guess it makes sense: Helios is the god of the sun, but Ares is the god of war.

Koi to Producer 12 (FINAL)

I read on the wiki Lucien’s power is copying powers. No wonder I couldn’t get a solid handle on it!

So that Helios wasn’t a mistake in the credits list in the previous episode???

Can we even hear what Helios says when Protag-chan is pulled away? Based on the lack of subs, probably no, but I wanted to ask anyway. (Or maybe he said “Watashi”, since that’s the pronoun Protag-chan goes by?)

…so that really is Kiro, huh?

Military…what? When did Protag-chan’s father have a military squad???

LOL, at the very end you can see Gavin gesturing at Greenie (the pot plant, presumably a succulent). I logged on to the game 7 days straight (they have a Discord channel!) and got a Gavin R card with Greenie on it, which is how I know about it.

Anyways, that was a fun show. Not the best, but still fun.

HypMic 3

*snickers* Just look at my boi! He’s so tall, he has to bend down for kids! (I don’t mean that teasingly, I mean that endearingly, but lately I’ve been no good at expressing myself…Must be the lockdown.)

If TsudaKen was a guest last time, then Degarashi and Irihatoma could be voiced by guest seiyuus too…

What is Jakurai, hmm? (A Transformer, LOL?...I’m kidding, of course.)

All I knew about this episode going in was that it was an MTR episode. Maybe they’ll cover the stalker story from the manga…?

More literally, Hifumi’s sign says “will you monopolise me until morning?”. This reminds me of the MTR truck one of the servers I was in was talking about…it looked like a giant billboard.

“The most notable thing about Doppo is that he has no notable characteristics.”…and yet, he’s still one of the most popular characters of the series.

Suddenly, HypMic becomes a mystery…? I’ll take it!

Yup, “Doppomine” is now confirmed as “Doppo-chin”.

If all the mysteries I’ve consumed say one thing, it’s “never forget there might be someone out there with a grudge against you willing to pin a crime on you”…or alternatively, “never forget there may be an unrelated 3rd party who would be willing to pin a crime on you”.

These guys (Tom etc.) are just food critics, I swear…(LOL)

Oddly enough(?), googling “Shinjuku waffles” reveals there are several waffle places in Shinjuku…you wouldn’t expect so many waffles away from the home of waffles (probably Belgium), but there you go.

All the results on Shinjuku French toast point to this Café Aaliya (give or take an H at the end). Apparently, it’s so popular, people line up for it on weekdays.

Oh, so Tom’s a (street) photographer…what are Iris and Rex then?

The CGI on that car looks really bad, man. It may be dark to disguise it, but it still looks bad.

Jakurai’s dad car strikes again!...Was it white? I don’t remember, but I’m pretty sure it was a lighter colour than this.

I was quite worried about how much swearing they were going to throw in the MTC episode, but then…they kicked it down a week. So…start worrying about next week, folks!

I…thought he would call Jyuto for some reason. (giggles) I’ve never seen Samatoki look so happy in relation to Jakurai, but maybe that’s because he’s just chilling. (Or maybe he was meant to have a neutral but slightly happy face and they messed up the angle. I know I do that sometimes in fanart.)

There’s Jyuto, right on cue…LOL, that kick to the guts was so random it became epic!

Uwabami…what sort of snake is that, again? *checks* Giant snake. That’s no help. (That host could have a guest seiyuu too.)

Ooh, I’m fairly sure that’s an automatic car.

Jakurai went Jitsu wa kyoumi bukai desu ne?. “Fascinating” isn’t a wrong translation, but they did forget “In fact…” or “Really…” from the start and possibly the “?” at the end (depending on interpretation). Update: It might actually be Jitsu ni, but same deal.

They struttin’ down Kabuki-cho all fancy-like…Doppo sure does get a lot of punchlines, though.

This random guy at the club could also have a guest seiyuu…

…what’s with the random Tahoma?

…oh, hey. If Hifumi’s jacket acts as a security blanket of sorts against women and he gave it to Doppo for extra warmth (presumably), then…he’s trying to protect Doppo, even in his own sort of unique way.

Mimimi vs Hifumi? This is gonna get confusing…(hey, did they actually make a flourish noise when Hifumi put on his jacket? Does the distinction need to be that clear…?)

…see, never forget the presence of an unrelated 3rd party.Wait, so we have motive…what’s the relationship of Mimimi and the dude she killed? Who is that dude? Update: We find out later.

Notice Mimimi says “Hifumi-kun” – she’s still on an outside layer compared to Doppo, who just uses Hifumi’s name. Also, I noticed Mimimi called herself Hifumi’s “onna” – “woman” – explicitly, as if she belonged to him. The subs reflect that, but it seems to have less meaning in English because they outright translated it as such.

Well, they got to demonstrate Doppo’s snapping. I’m more than happy with just that. Also, Hifumi calls Doppo with a -kun here.

LOL, this song is gonna be known as “catchy”, ain’t it? Anything with an easy-to-sing-along chorus like “nananana” is. Update: Or maybe not even a chorus, it’s just lyrics.

Hmm…I noticed the “use Mr with me” line isn’t actually reflected in the subs, but the lyrics are so fast, I don’t know how they are reflected.

Did you notice the da in the lyrics in romaji?

…and s*** goes ka-blooey, as you’ve come to expect by now.

Mimimi-kun…?

Oh, so the background from Hypnosis Mics can get caught in photos? I never thought of that.

It’s almost as if they’re nodding at the Doppo fans through the 4th wall regarding his appeal.

It seems they’re not switching out this Buster Bros track, which is…okay, but I was hoping for an MTR ED. (Tofubeats was on this track IIRC and the anime website didn’t list a future ED, so that’s why I’m okay with it.)

…Okay, so Irihatoma is Mutsumi Iwanaka, who’s a rookie in the seiyuu world. *goes to consult Anime News Network*

Oh! Mimimi Hibakari! I get it! (It means “me, me, me all day” when written differently to her name.)

Uwabami was Shugo Nakamura and Degarashi was Mitsuaki Hoshino. I’ve never heard of these guys – except for Nakamura’s role as Teru in Idolm@ster Side M – so it’s interesting they contrasted TsudaKen with them…eh? Heilong? Whossat? (Probably the guy whose…parts…almost got crushed by Jakurai with a billiards cue.) This Hiroya Eto is even more underground than those guys.

A-hah! Today’s new song is “WELCOME U” (that’s how it’s spelt, don’t diss me for it!) by Kohei from SIMONSAYZ.

Update: I thought that kid at the beginning was Yotsutsuji, so it scared me for a second.

[tenpin-boleyn]

Rebellious Parr at School!

These were thought up by @wolfies-chew-toy and I- mostly MB- because Cathy going through teenage rebellion is I C O N I C

There are some teenage Anne in here too but mostly our girl Cathy P 🖤

Also I’m sorry about the length- I’m on mobile so I can’t add a read more :)

•Anne got her heelys confiscated, so she decided to sandpaper the bottom of her shoes so she can slide around like a penguin. No wheels? No problem.

•Catherine being the feminist icon that all teachers fear:

“NO I AM NOT READING ROMEO AND JULIET AS ITS A DEROGATORY REPRESENTATION OF WOMEN AND SHOULD BE TREATED AS SUCH”

Then Catherine promptly gets removed from the class.

“Catherine don’t you have English right now?”

“Don’t you have your funeral!!.... oh my god Mrs lynn I’m so sorry” because Cathy is a badass but she still has feelings

•Confusing the teachers on a daily basis:

"Hitler is kinda like Kim Jong Un dont you think?"

"Miss Parr and Miss Seymour what are you talking about?"

"Miss, isn't Kim Jong Un rather like Hitler?"

"Please stop discussing your Kpop idols in my class."

•The school has different colors led name tags for the different years, eg. Seventh year, yellow, eighth year green etc.

You can bet your ass Parr has a name tag in each colour and wears them all at once. It ranges from her actual name to Catradora. She has a name tag that just says CatParr420 and wears it everywhere.

And 90% of the time she wears a blank one and carries around a marker

“Umm excuse me what’s your name?”

Which prompts Cathy to draw on a fake name.

“Anita Willtolive”!

•She draws penises on all the whiteboards of every class she enters in permanent marker.

•One time the school used a drone to film the morning assembly and the noise annoyed Cathy so much she picked her book from morning reading up and h u r l e d it at the drone.

All you can hear before the recording stops is “YEET”

Did she get detention? Yes

Was it worth it? HELL YES

•You can bet your bottom dollar that Anne is in that detention too.

Anne's reasons for detention range from stuff like chatting to general shenaniganery but Cathy is just oPEN DEFIANCE

•She only is nice to her classmates

•And selected teachers

•She's a dick to everyone else

•But if she sees a kid on their own she’ll go out of her way to be lovely to them and to that one annoying teacher she hates, she’s a hell raiser

•She once moved the empty table next to her desk away to the other end of the class to stop teachers from sitting next to her- whilst the teacher was trying to sit at said desk.

•Catherine openly questioning EVERYTHING

“But if everyone is only nice to get into heaven surely that defeats the purpose and they’re being fake”

•She would fall asleep in front of the teacher

She'd just yell goodnight really loudly and knock out on her desk

•Honestly it’s a wonder she hasn’t been kicked out, but Jane thinks it’s because her grades bring up the school average

•She does her homework the moment she gets it and is finished by the end of the day

•Anne just puts in her file and lets it rot

•Parr gets in trouble for handing in Anne’s homework that Parr did but Anne has no idea. Cathy just wanted to make sure she didn’t fail

•Anne teaches Parr how to get discounts in the cafeteria, because Parr needs free cookies.

•Parr is Anne's defender when it comes to detentions

•She gives the teacher her Stare™️ and they instantly clam up

•Their detention desks are side by side and they have like those partners in crime necklaces but instead of two halves on their necklaces they’re carved into the tables

They they put them together they just line up

“Parr scares all the teachers except the German teacher who is literally Satan.

•Anne looks scary but she is basically harmless

•Parr looks like she wouldn't hurt a fly but given the chance she would 100% bite her teacher's hand off

•Anne has like five piercings and the messiest uniform in existence while Parr has only one piercing in each ear and the neatest uniform in existence but the moment Parr opens her mouth you better run

•She once bit a first year because they got in her way

•Cross any of Parr's friends or Parr herself and you might as well drop out because you'll be on a hit list for your whole education career

•She’s got a little black book of people that’s annoyed her because eventually she forgets but she’s too petty to let her memory get the better of her

•Anne has been on it at least once but Parr always strikes her name out

•She once kicked Parr in the stomach trying to show off her sandpapered shoes

•The shoe flew off and hit Parr in the stomach

She would have screamed at Anne but Anne’s puppy dog eyes are irresistible

Especially at 12 years old because she’s literally a baby

Like not even in a sexual way, you just can’t say no to those eyes

•Seymour has also been on the list once

But Parr got her revenge

What did Seymour do? She keeps taking Parrs highlighters

So Parr makes her pay money for every time she uses her highlighters

And one day a teacher sees and thinks it’s a drug deal

Every late payment is + 1 quid

Jane knows better than to accumulate late payments because Parr is ruthless when it comes to money

•When a classmate lost Parrs calculator and didn't pay her back, Parr literally carved owe money pay money onto her desk and got that person's friends to remind them daily till they paid her back

•Every time that person saw Parr in the hallways they'd turn around and head the other direction

•Tardies don't matter when the most trigger-happy person in school is out for your blood

•The day that she’s sat next to Parr in the seating plan is the day she moves schools

•Even then Parr still tracks her down

•She waits for them at the school gate with the most murderous smile on her face

•You just see Anne behind her chewing gum, snapping her fingers and doing jazz hands

•And the person is rapidly dialing their parents while screaming MOM COME PICK ME UP I'M SCARED

•Suddenly Aragon pulls up with the others and shouts at the pair “get in losers we’re going shopping”

"How the hell did you even find them Cathy?"

"I just followed the smell of crippling debt and it led me here."

“No seriously how?”

“Anne never turns her snapmaps off”

•Also Parr made the PE teacher cry more than once. More than twice. Okay it was 27 times.

•Parr has a pen knife and people try to confiscate it but she just brings out a printed sheet of paper that says that “a knife may be carried as a self defence weapon if it is under 9 inches and is retractable”

•She made the history teacher quit.

•One time she threatened to give someone salmonella because they were giving Anne and Kat a hard time

•Both Anne and Kat are in special ed and someone thought it'd be funny to bully them cuz of it

•She was skipping class in the toilets and two girls walk in and start bad mouthing Anne and Kitty so she kicks open her door and looks at them whilst sucking a lolly pop “hello bitches say goodbye to ur eyebrows”

•Parr is super defensive of the two of them

•She teases them sure but if anyone else tries, they have to sleep with one eye open

•Anne and Kat don't understand why people keep coming up and apologizing to them

•When they ask Parr, she just shrugs and smiles

•Parr used to be super motivated back in year seven. When year eleven rolled around, she became a little more rebellious, first the name tags, then the mouthing off. Then it escalated further and further. No one else but Parr and Anne knows what happened to cause this change

•Parr is soft for Anne and Kat and Anne and Kat alone

•She roughs up Aragon, Seymour and Cleves bc she knows they can take it. She's soft when she needs to be and not many people see that side of her

•Her favourite teachers rarely see that side either. Only during teacher's day when she sneaks into the staffroom to give them homemade cookies

•Parr wears leather jackets to class and no one dares question her.

•Anne learnt Chinese and how to play the guitar during detention so that she could sing for Parr the next time they had a session together

•Anne singing Unchained Melody exactly like in ghost the musical, and does the little elvis riff too

•Parr and Anne facetime and do Kahoots together because they need to study aka theyre competitive as shit

•Cathy gets excited in class and stands on her chair and yells "I KILLED SIRIUS BLACK I KILLED SIRIUS BLACK. U COMING TO KILL ME???" And promptly gets removed from the class.

•Parr gets a "Little Miss Adventurous" award for having the most travelled converstation.

BONUS:

•The queens doing that egg project where they have to bring an egg home and keep it for a week

•Anne calls hers Eggward Eggburt.

•Aragon drops it the moment she gets it

•Anne brings the egg home and makes it into an omelette

•Jane does well till the sixth day where she goes fuck it and uses it to bake cookies.

•Cleves breaks it during lunch after Anne called her a name and she threw it at her

•Kat gives hers to Jane and it's baked into chocolate chip cookies

•Parr shuts hers in the fridge for a week and takes it out at the end of the week

•Anne gets asked where her egg is and she pats her stomach which results in Kitty yelling “YOURE PREGNANT?!”

•Jane gets asked where her egg is and she holds up this cookie jar and offers the teacher one

•Parr is praised for being the only one in class for having an intact egg and then she grabs the egg and breaks it on the teacher's head cuz she 'needed to shut up'

[gumnut-logic]

V.T. Green (Part Seven)

Title: V. T. Green

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five | Part Six | Part Seven

Author: Gumnut

15 – 20 Oct 2019

Fandom: Thunderbirds Are Go 2015/ Thunderbirds TOS

Rating: Teen

Summary: “Did you discover this, Brains?” He frowned. There was something familiar about this. Maybe they had discussed it recently.

“Oh, no, this is V. T. Green. The man is brilliant.”

Word count: 2801

Spoilers & warnings: None.

Timeline: Standalone

Author’s note: Extra thanks to @scribbles97 for the direction this took towards the end of this chapter. I thought this would be the last chapter, but there is just too much to put into one, so I’ve had to split it into two. One more chapter, partly written already. I’m getting to the end slowly. I hope you enjoy this :D

Many thanks to @scribbles97 , @vegetacide  and @thunderstorm-bay for all their wonderful help with this.

Disclaimer: Mine? You’ve got to be kidding. Money? Don’t have any, don’t bother.

-o-o-o-

 He hit the stairs and almost collided with Alan.

They both froze for a moment, his younger brother staring at him with a mixture of emotion. It was the fear that froze Virgil. The subtle widening of his brother’s eyes, the step back...

Virgil’s frustration with John evaporated.

“Alan? What’s wrong?”

“Uh, hey, Virg.” And his brother attempted to push past and continue down the stairs.

Virgil caught his arm. “Alan?”

His brother stopped, hesitating as if he didn’t know what to do, but then a subtle shift in his stance and he slumped in defeat. “I’m sorry, Virgil.”

“What?��� Virgil stared.

“I’ve been an ass.”

A blink. “Well, yeah, but what is the problem?” Okay, yes, Alan had been an ass, but that expression on his little brother’s face wasn’t one he enjoyed in the slightest. He turned on the stairs so he was facing Alan head on. “It happens. I’ll get over it. Not the first time.”

Alan slumped further before straightening in a more characteristic stubbornness that relieved Virgil more than he was willing to admit.

“You scared me, okay? Why is it that you have to put everything on the line every time I screw up?” He waved a hand towards Virgil’s shoulder. “And to top it all off, you got hurt. Because of me!”

“Alan, I-“

“It was a stupid move, Virgil. You shouldn’t have to get hurt because of me.”

Virgil found himself staring speechless again.

“Anyway, I’m sorry. Sorry you got hurt, sorry I didn’t listen, sorry it happened at all.” Blue eyes begged acceptance.

A bird flew over the pool outside and squawked at something unseen.

Virgil reached out and wrapped his good arm around his little brother and pulled him in for a hug. There may have been a kiss to his hair, making Alan squirm.

Muttered into blond strands. “I’m your big brother. Would do it again, and more.” He squeezed just a little.

“Aww, Virg, c’mon.” Alan wriggled loose, obviously embarrassed, but didn’t entirely let go. “It won’t happen again.”

“I didn’t think it would.” A small smile curved his lips. “My little brother is too smart for that.”

If Alan clung to him a bit at that comment, neither of them said anything.

“Are we good?”

The question took him by surprise. Sure, his brother had been pissed at him, but they were brothers. Came with the territory. “I wasn’t aware we were anything but.” Again with the smile. “It’s not like you drank the last of the coffee or anything.”

“Now that you mention it...” Alan was grinning at him.

Virgil raised a finger and pointed it at his brother. “Now that is not a joking matter. You leave my coffee alone.”

“Oh, so that’s your Achilles heel, is it? You have given me power, oh addict bro.”

“Watch it, brat.” That one good hand mussed his brother’s hair.

But Alan was laughing as he ducked out of reach, resuming his clamber down the stairs. Virgil’s eyes followed him and a weight lifted off his shoulders. His smile slipped to one of fondness and a little love for his little brother.

Now he was getting soppy.

But Alan’s apology meant a great deal, and as he resumed climbing the stairs, the smile stayed on his lips.

-o-o-o-

Despite his nap in the afternoon, Virgil crashed early that night. He stole food from the fridge and holed up in his room with an engineering journal. Grandma attempted to chase him up, but he pleaded injury. Of course, this only prompted an appearance at his door by his eldest brother, in mimicry of earlier in the day, pills in hand. Supervised while taking them, he did not spare his brother the required glare.

The concern in Scott’s eyes was reassured with a handful of words and Virgil was left to himself.

He didn’t mean to fall asleep while reading, but perhaps it was what he needed.

-o-o-o-

The world was blurry as Virgil let his head slide on his one good hand and stared out through the kitchen window.

He had no idea why he was awake. He had slept like the dead and woken on top of the covers still in his clothes, his tablet on the floor.

His throat was parched and his head full of cotton and his only thought had been coffee. Stumbling down from the residential levels, he somehow missed all the walls, bee-lining for the kitchen and his almighty coffee maker.

Of course, at this end of the day both his military brothers were up and about. Gordon, of course was in the pool, but Scott, just back from his run, stared at him for quite a moment, his blue gaze caught between a concern he was hallucinating and worry that Virgil might be near death for some undisclosed reason.

The result had been the reappearance of that bottle of pills and the mandatory glare until Virgil gulped them down. The fact he was so dopey almost led to him choking on the damn things, but the coffee in Scott’s other hand led him on like a carrot before a mule.

His brother had eventually let him have the coffee and left him to his own devices, so now he sat in his usual spot staring out at Mateo and trying to boot his brain.

“Good morning, Virgil.”

He blinked. “Oh, hey, John.” Was that a sea eagle circling above Mateo? He hadn’t checked out the cliffs recently. He wondered if they were nesting again. If so, those gulls wheeling about and making a ruckus had every right to be concerned.

“You awake there?”

“Huh?”

John was sitting across from him, smiling his soft smile as he nestled his own cup of coffee between his fingers. “Unusual to see you up this time of the day.”

“Went to bed early. Woke up early.” Coffee slid down his throat and, oh god, it was good.

“How’s your arm.”

“S’okay. Scott drugged me already.”

“Good.” There was silence for a moment. “Virgil, about yesterday, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you.”

He turned to stare at his brother. He did not have the brain cells for this yet. “S’fine. Whatever. I’m you. You’re me. Forget it.”

“What?”

“Huh?”

“Drink your coffee, Virgil.”

Gordon wandered in, towelling his hair dry. The moment his eyes landed on Virgil, he froze. “Did we get a call out?”

John arched an eyebrow in the direction of his damp brother. “No, why?”

“Well, the walking dead is mobile and the sun is barely up. I had to think the worst.”

“Shut up, Gordon.”

“Yep, that’s him. That cancels out the alien bodysnatching theory.”

John stared at him. “What? A call out is worse than alien bodysnatching?”

Gordon shrugged. “Depends on the callout.”

Virgil growled at him.

“Hoo, and the level of grump we need to endure.”

Scott swooped in behind and cuffed him up the head. “Leave Virgil alone. He’s injured.”

“Heh, that just means he can’t whip my ass.”

“Don’t test me, fish food.” Gordon was particularly irritating first thing in the morning.

Of course, he only laughed.

“Can it, Gordon.” Kayo prowled into the room. ‘Prowl’ was the only word for it. His sister moved like a cat - silent and slinky.

Slinky? Oh god, more coffee. He upped the cup and stood to go in search of another one. Kayo smiled at him as she delved into the refrigerator. More coffee.

By the time his cup had refilled, Alan had wandered in and stolen his seat. “Hey!”

“Huh?”

Okay, Alan looked as bad as he felt. Virgil stumbled back to the table and sat beside him. “You okay?”

“Eh, bad dreams. I’ll be fine.”

Virgil put his coffee down and placed his hand on his brother’s back. “Wanna talk about it?”

“Not really.” A young blue gaze peered up at him. A sigh. “Ask me after breakfast. I might be awake by then.”

He ran his hand in a few circles across his little brother’s back before his own need for coffee overrode everything and he had to pull his one available hand back into service.

A glass of orange juice and a bowl of cereal appeared in front of Alan courtesy of their eldest brother. Virgil smiled at Alan’s scowl, only to have a similar bowl land in front of him, complete with matching orange juice. “What?”

Scott smirked at him. “You missed dinner last night. You’re not missing breakfast.”

Goddamned smother hen. But Virgil grumbled and poked at the cornflakes. Kayo dumped a bowl of fruit on the table. Gordon found his own breakfast and planted himself next to John. “Oooh, a family breakfast. This doesn’t happen very often.”

Virgil and Alan in concert. “Shut up, Gordon.”

“Hmm, and now I see why.”

Scott pulled up a chair and grinned at his own breakfast.

Virgil couldn’t hold his spoon and his coffee at the same time and it was very annoying.

“No, no, no, no! Th-This can’t be r-right!” Brains stormed into the room, tablet in hand, Max wailing in behind him. He almost collided with Kayo who was making her way over to the table with her bowl and drink in hand. All that training shone through as she both managed to dodge the irate engineer and save her breakfast from the floor.

“Brains, you okay?” Scott rose from his chair.

“N-no, I-I’m not. V. T. Green d-deleted his blog and I can find no t-trace of him or his theories!”

Virgil choked on his cereal, coughing and spluttering until Alan whacked him gently on the back. Gordon and John both flicked glances in his direction, but busied themselves eating.

“He’s gone?” Scott’s voice could only be described as disappointed. “I thought you were tracking him down? Nothing is ever completely deleted. John, do you think you would be able to get a trace on this guy?”

“Um...”

“Why don’t you just ask Virgil?” Kayo swallowed a mouth of cereal.

“What?” Scott stared at her before darting a glance at his brother.

“Well, it was his blog, wasn’t it?”

The room fell silent and every eye landed on the man.

Virgil sculled his mug full of hot coffee.

It scorched all the way down.

“V-Virgil?” It was small and shocked and it came from Brains. “A-Are y-you V-V. T. G-Green?”

He turned to face his fellow engineer, fearful of what he would find. Brains’ expression was worried, stressed and possibly hurt. Shit. Damn. Virgil slumped where he sat for just a split second before forcing himself to face the music. A swallow. “I am. It’s...he is me.”

The room fell silent again, the tension in the air waiting for Brains’ reaction. The engineer’s stare didn’t leave Virgil for a moment. Wide-eyed he approached slowly.

Virgil had no idea what to do.

Then Brains was hugging him, babbling incoherently in his ear. His shoulder complained and he had to shift, but the slight engineer continued to cling, a number of jumbled equations spilling all over him in joyful excitement.

Oh god.

He must have winced one time too many because the next moment Scott was gently pulling Brains off him.

“You’re V.T. Green?” Scott’s quiet question made it over Brains’ jubilant mutterings as he held the man.

Virgil looked up at his brother. “Yeah.” His gaze darted back to his hands. Whispered. “Sorry.”

“Why didn’t you say something?”

Brains had fallen silent and once again, all the eyes in the room were on Virgil.

“Um...”

“You designed that self-healing polymer?” Alan’s eyes were wide behind him. “V.T Green is a genius...” Those eyes widened even further. “You’re a genius.”

Virgil couldn’t hold his gaze and turned back to staring at his hands. A shrug. “John’s the genius.”

“Virgil, why did you hide it from us?” The expression on Scott’s face could only be considered concerned.

“I didn’t!” And there was the kicker. “I thought you guys knew! It was pretty damned obvious.”

Kayo snorted. “You’d think a genius would pick a better pseudonym.”

He glared at her as she picked a strawberry out of the bowl of fruit, popped it in her mouth and smiled at him.

“I wasn’t trying to hide.”

“Then why didn’t you say something?” Scott was obviously determined.

“I didn’t know what to say!” A frown. “Kayo is right.” He swallowed. “It was obvious.” He stood up and shouldered past his eldest brother. He needed more coffee.

“Three cups? That’s a lot even for you.” Gordon piped up, but for once he wasn’t taking a dig at Virgil. There was genuine concern in his voice.

But, of course, that only prompted smother hen to step in and prevent him from reaching the coffeemaker.

“Scott...”

“This is what has been bothering you.”

“Bothering me? Of course, it has been bothering me! It was damned obvious and out of all the brothers I thought knew me well, only one worked it out!” He stared at his family. “You’re all smart, damned geniuses in your own right, but it never even occurred to most of you that V.T. Green was me. They are my initials! I’m an engineer. I’ve had that website for years, and only one of you worked it out. I’ve never tried to hide anything from you. You’ve worked with me for most of my life.” He turned to Brains. “You’ve worked with me as an engineer. We speak the same damned language and you didn’t work it out.” He turned back to Scott, glaring up at him. “So yeah, it did bother me. I’m sorry, it pissed me off. I thought you knew me better than that. Obviously, I was wrong.” And with that he turned and stormed up the stairs, ignoring his name being called behind him.

-o-o-o-

Gordon sighed as Scott darted up the stairs after Virgil. That was not going to end well.

He shoved the remainder of his breakfast away and stood.

“How did you know it was him?” Alan’s voice was quiet and worried.

Another sigh as he kicked his chair back under the table. “I didn’t at first. I was as slow on the uptake as the rest of you. It was only Virgil’s reaction when I mentioned the name to him that gave it away.”

“I feel h-horrible.” Brains couldn’t slump any further without falling over. “L-looking back, V-Virgil is right. It was o-obvious.”

“C’mon...he’s Virgil. Who could have known?”

“What is that supposed to mean?” Gordon rounded on Alan. “And I suppose you think I’m only good for a pair of swim trunks and the occasional prank.”

“Gordon, I...” But his eyes said everything.

“Well, isn’t that just dandy. Thanks for your confidence in both of us.”

“Gordon, he didn’t mean it that way.” John put a hand on his arm.

“Yes, he did. No wonder Virgil is so pissed.” He stepped away from the table and John let go. “You geniuses just have a think on that while I go commiserate with our vastly underestimated brother.”

With that he rounded the table and followed his two older brothers up the stairs.

As expected, those two brothers were having words at the elevator.

“Just leave it, Scott.”

“Virg, you know you have my confidence. We discussed this yesterday.”

“I know.” His second eldest brother straightened. His clothes were wrinkled as if he had slept in them. His sling was hanging crooked.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Scott’s voice was almost begging.

Gordon slumped where he stood. He thought Scott knew Virgil better than that.

And sure enough... “I shouldn’t have had to tell you, Scott. You, of all people, should have worked it out! Hell, I dropped clues all through that conversation.”

“And I asked you repeatedly what the hell was wrong and you refused to tell me!”

Okay, this was getting into yelling territory and whenever his two biggest brothers really let go, it was never good...for anyone.

Gordon stepped up to the two of them, placing his definitely unwanted-self right into the middle of the argument.

Sure enough, one blue and one brown glare landed directly between his eyeballs. “Hey, guys, what’s up?”

“Gordon...” Scott pinched the bridge of his nose.

Virgil took the opportunity to disappear into the elevator and vanish, his furious expression taken away by the closing doors.

“Damnit!” Scott was combusting on the spot.

Gordon dropped a hand on his shoulder. “Hey, I’ll take this one.”

“What?” His big brother spun, anger in his eyes.

“I’ll speak to Virgil.”

That blue gaze narrowed on him and he could see the calculations behind his brother’s eyes. Ever the strategist.

Gordon rolled his eyes. “I’ve got this.” And without a further word, he ignored the elevator and took the stairs two at a time.

-o-o-o-

End Part Seven

Part Eight

[jungshookz]

android!yoongi

→ pairing: min yoongi x reader

→ genre: android!au becauSe for some reason android aus are popping up everywhere, the usual heaping serving of fluff and comedy, N S F W like reALLY nsfw i poPPED OFF this time i don’t know even know what happened,,, forgive me god for i have sinned, a n g s t, i definitely teared up a little writing this because i was listening to kim bum soo’s i miss you and it made me 100x more emo

→ trigger warnings: this does get a little intense! beware!! 

→ wordcount: 24k like that bruno mars song

→ note: um,,,,, this is literally 24k+ words i don’t even know what to say,,, how did i write so much without realising???? but ya a lot of android aus have been popping up on my dashboard and i’m seeing a lot of android!jungkook but i feLt like android!yoongi was more fitting?? aLso thank u so much for the love n support for ceo!yoongi i 100% was not expecting it to get as many likes and reblogs as it did so you guys are truly the best!!!!!!!! anyways i had a loT of fun writing this and i hope u guys like android!yoongi as much as i do :-))) 

pst if u wanna talk to android yoongs u know what to do ;-) 

(gif isn’t mine!) ((i had such a hard time choosing a gif because he looks so boyfriend-y in all of them but i ended up going with this one because at one point in the fic he feeds u with chopsticks)) 

(((and the read more function iS there but most of the time it doesn’t work on mobile :// i am sorry don’t attack me by sending passive-aggressive anon messages)))

“oh, absolutely fucking not.”

“y/n, please.”

“no.”

“pLEASE”

“namjoon, no!!!!” you slam your fork down on the table and clear your throat when you get a couple glances from other customers near you

“c’mon, why not???”

“i have a life!! i’m not going to babysit a robot-“

“it’s a humanoid android. actually the professional term for it is a human mind model adaptive super android.”

“right, i’m not going to babysit a roBOT for you because you wanna see if you can make a profit selling weird robot slaves.”

“they’re not weird! and i’ve been working on them for a long time - since the beginning of freshmen year! we finally have a prototype and i thought you’d be the perfect human for Y00NGI.”

“don’t give it a name, you’re humanising it. and what kind of a name is Y00NGI, anyways??”

“it’s supposed to be a take on you and i. get it??”

“that’s terrible and i hate that with my entire soul. i just don’t get why i have to take care of it. can’t you get jin to take care of it? he’s like 100x more responsible than i am.”

“y/n, the purpose of this robot is to be like… a helper. jin doesn’t need any help with anything. you on the other hand….. i know you hate it when i say this but you’ve kind of…. you’ve been a mess since your breakup with kihyun and i just thought it’d be good for you to have Y00NGI around to help out!! someone to pick up your takeaway boxes and someone to wake you up so you get to work on damn time for once and aLso someone to force you out of the house because of how socially awkward you-“

“i’m not socially awk- why didn’t you name it Y00NI instead? that’s more like you and i than Y00NGI.”

you’re like hiGHKEY offended that namjoon thinks you’re unable to take care of yourself and that you’re socially awkward like you can make a REALLY good grilled cheese sandwich and you’re like okay-ish at interacting with other people your age

sure one time you accidentally threw in a red sock into the whites and all your sheets turned pink but that doesn’t mean you can’t freaking take care of yourself

and pink sheets are totally trendy right now

okay about kihyun

first things first you’ve been a single lady for a couple months now

yes you admit that you kind of turned into a liTTle bit of a hot mess after kihyun broke up with you

to be fair he was the one who always cooked and cleaned and made you interact with his friends

but you always tried your best to make meals for him and you always had a smile on your face whenever the two of you hung out with hIS friends - he ended the relationship because he felt like you were holding him back

you don’t like to get into it

but you’re better now!!!!!!

you sort of know the basics of the washing machine and you can also make pretty good spaghetti so sUCK on that kihyun

plus you just liked staying home rather than going out to party but that didn’t make u socially awkward

“look, it was a creative decision on my part, alright? i don’t see what the big deal is.”

“you know how i feel about technology, joon. i got freaked out when you asked your alexa thing to tell you a joke and she not only told you a horrible joke but also had a very demon-y laugh.”  

“you know... jungkook thinks Y00NGI is pretty cool.”

you perk up at the mere mention of jungkook

long story short you have the FATTEST crush on jungkook and you would honestly probably kill someone for him

after your nasty breakup with kihyun he always found ways to cheer you up

you work at the library at bangtan laboratories and jungkook always brought you lunch and snacks and came up to tell you stories and keep you company

so it wasn’t a huge surprise when one day you felt your heart flutter when he smiled at you in his adorable bunny way

namjoon’s the only one who knows considering he’s ur best friend but now he’s just using it against you

“so jungkook should take care of it.”

“he lives with jimin - he doesn’t need a helper. i’m sure he’d visit your place a LOT if you took Y00NGI in.” namjoon smirks to himself and takes a sip of his coffee when he notices your change in expression

okay well

taking care of an android-humanoid-thing wouldn’t be too bad

it’s only for a couple of months so that namjoon can see if his creation actually works

you won’t have to cook for yourself or clean for yourself

and jungkook might pop over more often as namjoon said

hm

“well- fine. only because i’m… a good person and a good friend. that’s the only reason why i’m helping you out.”

namjoon’s like loL okay ya sure

the rest of lunch goes by and namjoon’s just excited that he’ll finally be able to see if his android will actually work

a week goes by and you get daily texts from namjoon telling you Y00NGI is almost ready for you and you hATE that because it sounds like he’s sending Y00NGI to assassinate you

like literally one of the texts you got was just

’soon.’

and you wanted to murder namjoon because it freaked you out so much

it’s sunday morning and you’re enjoying a nice bowl of cinnamon toast crunch while watching cartoons when you hear your doorbell

you wipe the sprinkles of sugar off your mouth as you rush to the door and

holy shit

“i’ve got a package here for miss y/l/n?”

you’re tempted to tell the mailman that miss y/l/n lives somewhere else because jeSUS this is a HUGE box

“that’s, uh, that’s me i guess”

he hands you a clipboard and you sign off on it and he wheels the damn thing into the middle of your living room and then is just like peace out

so now you’re standing in the middle of your living room with this big ass cardboard box

the first thing you do is call namjoon

“hello?” his voice is groggy which indicates he was still asleep

“why didn’t you tell me this box was so big!! how big is this thing!!!”

“he’s not a thing, don’t be rude. he’s a little taller than you and a little shorter than me. the box is big because i put like a bunch of packaging peanuts and styrofoam in so he wouldn’t be damaged when he arrived!!! he’s not cheap you know!!!!!!!”

“i thought he was made out of like metal”

“he’s not a tin man, y/n. his outer layer is made out of this synthetic silicon so he feels exacTLY like a human and i wanted to get him to you without a single scratch”

that is… sO FREAKY R U KIDDING ME

you don’t really want to open this package

what if it tries to kill you

“anyways you’ll have to charge him up for a little while because i didn’t recharge him before i packaged him up.”

“do i plug him in like a phone??? where do i even- omg do i plug the thing up his butt or somethi-“

“he’s in a charging pod right now. that’s another reason why the package is so big. you just have to plug the pod into the wall it’s not that hard.”

“namjoon i can’t moVE this thing alone-“

“omg you’re so whiney okay fine i’m coming over” namjoon hangs up on you and ur like the auDAcity of this man

while you wait for namjoon you get a box cutter and slice the sides of the box open

the sides of the box plop down onto the ground and your whole floor is littered in package peanuts and you see-

well it kinda looks like a fridge

but like a ~futuristic~ fridge

and on the front of the door you see Y 0 0 N G I

you see a little symbol blinking underneath his name

it’s an empty battery symbol and it’s bright red telling u that he’s out of juice

phEW

that means he won’t be able to murder you anytime soon

you kind of want to open the door and see what this Y00NGI thing looks like but you’re scared

god why did you agree to do this

so now instead of watching cartoons you’re shovelling cereal into your mouth and keeping an eye on the charging booth to make sure nothing suspicious happens

about 15 minutes go by and you’re so relieved when namjoon walks in and the other boys are trailing behind him and he’s like ur lucky i love u i would rather be asleep

and you’re like yOU’re lucky i love yOU otherwise i would never have agreed to this

namjoon: i’m also lucky you love jung-

you: ….juST help me move this stupid thing hHAAHhaa

you greet the other boys good morning

and you’re especially sweet to jungkook

he’s like :) hi y/n!!! i hope u slept well

he’s so cuTE you want to RIP OUT YOUR HEART and give it to him

ahem

namjoon wants to leave Y00NGI in your living room but there’s no way in hell you’re going to leave it here

what if you wanna get water in the middle of the night but then you have this pill-shaped fridge just blocking your path

“move it into the spare bedroom - if it freaks me out i’ll just lock it in.”

“it’s a HE y/n respect him!!!!” taehyung smacks your arm and nudges you aside so that he can help namjoon move the pod “jin-hyung and i spent a long time designing his face and his body so you better not do anything to fuck it up”

you kinda feel bad that you’re not helping the boys move the pod because it looks pretty heavy and all their faces are going red

but they think you’re a klutz and you’ll drop it on the way to the bedroom and chip something so they were all like nO you can’t help us please just sit down and don’t move

it takes the six of them ten minutes to move it into the guest bedroom down the hall and you’re sweating on their behalf and you’re like wOO that was tough good job guys while you’re just lounging on the couch and they’re all glaring at you lmao

“i plugged the pod into the wall for you - i’ll pay your electricity bills, so don’t worry about that. he takes up a lot of power.” namjoon mentions and gives you a sheepish smile when you’re like excuse mE whaT

“how long does he take to charge?”

“depends on how much battery he has. he’ll be ready by tonight since he’s completely outta battery” namjoon shrugs and plops down next to you

“i programmed him especially for you he knows like everYthing there is to know about you”

“…how much does he know”

“which hospital you were born at what your favourite food is what time you wake up what time you go to sleep what your favourite shampoo is what your mother’s maiden name is what your-“

“okAY i get it”

it’s safe to say that you are very much freaked out

as much as you like jungkook you’re not sure if this is even worth it anymore

this hunk of metal charging up in your room knows you better than you know yourself

it’s just eery because it…. well it’s a robot

you could peel its face back and you’d just see a freaky metal skeleton

you shudder to yourself but you’re like u know what we already went over the benefits of having this helper robot here so it’ll be fine

“you have to bring him to the lab every two weeks so i can check on his diagnostics and see if anything needs tweaking”

“…do i need to carry him and his pod there”

“nah the two of you can just walk over”

it’s still weird that they’re referring to the robot as if it was an actual human being rather than a machine but whatever you’ll get used to it

the lab is like a ten minute walk away from your place so it’s fine

you live in this pretty nice neighbourhood anD your apartment is pretty big anD you’re close to the lab so you can see why namjoon chose your place

“also you’ll have to wear this 24/7.” jungkook appears out of nowhere and takes your hand and you’re like omG his hands are so soft but then he’s clipping this bracelet around your wrist and you’re like wat

it looks like it’s made out of glass and you can see all the different coloured wires inside

and there’s a little Y00NGI etched on it

your eyes widen in surprise when the Y00NGI suddenly lights up and the bracelet gives you a little zap

“ah, there we go”

“ow! what the-“ you try to shake it off but you can’t

it’s like

attached to you somehow

it’s snug around your wrist

not snug enough to be considered uncomfortable but snug enough to make you aware of its presence

“it’s so Y00NGI can keep track of where you are and also if you’re ever sick he’ll be able to know your temperature and nurse you back to health”

“can i not take this thing off??”

“well… you can,,, with this key” he holds up a key and puts it back into his pocket “buT you lose things really easily and this bracelet is very very very expensive so nO you are not allowed to take this thing off”

“but-“

“it’s waterproof and sweatproof and everything in between so you’ll be fine!!” jungkook flashes you a sweet smile and you’re like okAy i’ll keep it on because u said so

“okay let me tell you a little bit about Y00NGI before we head off”

“aren’t you going to stay here until he wakes up??”

“that’ll take too long and we’re working on some more prototypes at the lab”

namjoon and the boys plop down on your couch and you sit opposite to them on your sofa chair

“as i mentioned before, Y00NGI is a human mind model adaptive super android”

“i know what each of those words mean but i don’t know what they mean when you put them all together like that”

“basically he’s programmed to learn things and grow smarter - so i don’t want you being a bad influence on- well, actually, he has more common sense than you do so i guess i don’t have to worry about that”

gasp

namjoon is so lucky you adore him otherwise he wouldn’t be getting away with all these snarky dIGS

“he knows the basic emotions like happy and sad and angry or whatever but the more time he spends with you the more emotions he’ll pick up-“

“i just hope he doesn’t become as dramatic as you”

“oh says yoU” you scowl at jin but now you’re wondering how the heck a robot can even feEL things in the first place

“so if i pinched him would he feel it?”

“of course he’d feel it”

“so he hurts too?”

“….why does this sound mildly threatening”

“nO i’m just curious i’m not going to hurt your robot friend”

namjoon wants to scream Y00NGI IS NOT JUST A ROBOT HE’S A HUMAN MIND MODEL-

“looK we’ve been working on Y00NGI for a long time and even though he’s built to withstand pretty much anything i still want you to be careful with him”

obviously you’ll be careful with him you’re not a monster

“you don’t have to feed him. of course he’s designed to ingest human food but like,, it won’t do anything for him lol he also doesn’t need to use the washroom either!!” while namjoon’s talking to you he unlocks your phone and plugs it into his laptop

“hey!!!!! what do you think you’re doing” you reach forward and namjoon smacks your hand away

“i’m installing Y00NGI’s app on your phone. i’m sorry it’s not available on the app store for you to download” he snorts and his fingers fly over the keyboard before he hits enter and you see a brand new app pop up on your home screen

“what’s the purpose of this app? it better not be like that app you downloaded on my phone last time that gave you full access to my texts-“

“i already told you i only did it because you were mad at me and i diDN’T know why and you weren’t talking to me so i really didn’t have a choice loOK the point is this isn’t another hacking app you’re fine”

“okay so tell me what it does”

“it monitors Y00NGI’s battery levels, Y00NGI can even send you a message on here if he wants!! also if there’s like a loose wire somewhere the app will show you where it is on his body and where you’re supposed to plug it back in”

namjoon spends a little more time telling you about Y00NGI and you’re still kind of freaked out but at the end of the day you’re proud of joon and the boys for inventing this human computer… android adaptor charger… robot.. man (is that what it’s called?? u already forgot)

“well we’ll be on our way now!! text me when Y00NGI wakes up” namjoon gives you a quick hug and the other boys are saying goodbye before you know it

you spend the rest of the day tidying up a little and doing some chores

for some reason you feel like you need to impress this hunk of metal that’s going to be living with you for the next eight months

you’re intimidated to go into his room and check if he’s fully charged so you can finally turn him on

so you promise yourself you’ll turn him on after dinner (which is pizza!!!!!!!)

you’re nibbling on your fourth slice of pizza and you pop the rest of the crust into your mouth and c r o n c h  thoughtfully

and then your phone buzzes next to you

Notification: Y00NGI APP - BATTERY FULLY CHARGED.

ok

ok cool

no need to be nervous

after all yoU are the one in control here

you are de captain of this ship

yoongi’s YOUR helper

you dust your hands off and stand up and head towards yoongi’s room

the door opens with a creak and you quickly turn the lights on

you end up staring at the yoongi refrigerator for like one whole minute but you shake your nerves off

it’s now or neVer

you don’t know why but you glance over your shoulder for some reason before you open up the pod door and

holy moly

taehyung and jin really put a lot of effort into designing Y00NGI’s face because he is literally the prettiest boy you think you’ve ever seen and you’re friends with jin and jimin and jungkook etc

a phrase to describe this face: boyfriend material

you’re kind of squatting down because his head is bent over since he’s standing upright and then your thighs start to burn from standing like this just staring up at Y00NGI so you cup his face and hold it up

you’re close enough to see each individual pore on his face

he has soft black tousled hair and it kind of shines in the light of the guest bedroom

his lashes cast a shadow over his cheeks

his lips are so cute

he even has a couple ear piercings

namjoon was right he does feel exactly like a human

you’re kind of having fun just squishing his face and washing his lips purse and unpurse because ??? he’s very VERY lifelike it’s almost concerning

they really went all out when they were designing Y00NGI

you can already tell that these BTS2500 androids are going to be popular when namjoon releases them if they’re as pretty as Y00NGI

“alright yoongi let’s see how to turn you on… oh yEs” you remember namjoon showing you where Y00NGI’s power button is

you wrap a hand around the back of his neck and blindly feel around for the button that should be on the nape of his-

you jump when Y00NGI powers up immediately as you hit the button

you take a step back and you see that he’s definitely awake but it looks like he’s still warming up a little because you can see his pupils dilating and constricting rapidly

and then he blinks once and his eyes settle on you

“Hello. I am Y00NGI. M1N Y00NGI.”

his eyes scan over your entire figure

“You are Y/N Y/L/N.”

“…ya that’s me” you’re still kind of shook because you don’t… really know what to DO “do you… do you wanna stay in your pod or should i…”

how do you even talk to a robot???

you gesture to the wire that’s plugged into the nape of his neck underneath his power button which you’re assuming is his charging cord

“you got enough juice in you?? my app tells me you’re at 99.9% but i can let you chill here until it-”

“I would like to inspect my surroundings.” you nod and reach forward and gently yank the cord out and you’re like :00000 when you see a flap of skin suddenly cover up the charging port and now it looks like a normal neck

yoongi steps out and then his pupils suddenly light up and there’s like a hologram of a blueprint that beams out of his eyes

“Scan complete. Location secure.” and then he’s walking out of the room and you’re not sure if you should turn the pod off to save battery or

“waiT yoongi where are you goi-“ you can’t even finish your question because he’s already going down your hallway to the living room

he’s standing there just staring at the TV so you move past him to sit on the couch

you don’t know where to go from here so you decide to continue eating your dinner

“Pizza is unhealthy.”

“but it’s good.”

you’re about to offer him a slice when he speaks up again

“One pepperoni pizza is approximately 2269 calories. Total fat: 83 grams. Total saturated fat: 38 grams. Cholesterol: 145 mg. Sodium: 5100.9 mg. Sugars: 31g.” yoongi starts naming off all the nutritional value facts of pizza while staring right at you and you’re like omg sTOP I GET IT

“Are you still hungry?”

“not really i mean i already had four slices so”

“Good.”

yoongi bends down and picks up the pizza box and proceeds to throw it into the bin

he looks over his shoulder at tilts his head slightly

“I am sensing that you are upset. Why are you upset?”

“you threw away my dinner!!!!!!”

even though you’re pretty full like you had four slices so you’re fine but stILL you liked eating cold leftover pizza for breakfast the next day

“Oh.” he looks down at the bin. “I suppose that is something you will have to deal with, then.”

and you’re like

excUSE ME

why is this android so,,,, sassy

namjoon did mention that jin was the one who programmed his personality so

like father like son

“You must sleep soon. The time now is 10:41PM.” he pauses and his eyes do that weird glitchy thing again “My database tells me that you have a very unhealthy sleeping schedule.”

UM

you’re getting roasted by a damn hunk of metal and you don’t even have a witty comeback

“i’m an adult, yoongi. i’ll go to bed whenever i want.” you snort and snuggle back into the couch and you hit play on the- “oH MY GOD PUT ME DOWN” suddenly everything’s spinning and you realise yoongi just threw you over his shoulder and is marching you down the hallway

you’re still flailing over his shoulder as he enters the washroom and picks up your toothbrush and squeezes some toothpaste on it for you

finally he lets you down but before you can say anything he shoves the toothbrush into your mouth and turns you over so that you’re facing the mirror

“i wuz goinf to eat some icfe cream after the pizza, you know”

“What kind of ice cream?”

you’re pleasantly surprised that he seems curious about your ice cream

“strawberry cheesecake flavoured ice cream it’s my fAvourite and-“

“One cup of strawberry cheesecake flavoured ice cream contains approximately-“ you roll your eyes and drown him out by turning on the tap as you brush your teeth and rinse your mouth out

once you’re done he follows you to your bedroom and then he nudges you in and immediately shuts the door without saying a word

“oh so you’re nOT going to tuck me in????” you feel obligated to ask him that considering he’s been treating you like a child

yoongi opens the door and pokes his head in a little as you’re about to get into bed

“You are an adult. Tuck yourself in.” and then he shuts the lights off and slams the door again and oOH you are so tempted to just hit that power-off button on the back of his neck so you won’t have to deal with him anymore

damn

how did namjoon rope you into doing this

8 damn months

“Time to wake up.”

you’re still half asleep even when yoongi pulls the blanket off of you causing you to whine and kick and blindly reach for your blanket

“You have to be at the lab in one hour.”

“what time is it??”

“It is 7:00AM.”

you rub the sleep out of your eyes and wince at the early morning sunlight

yoongi already opened up your curtains and you hATE being woken up by blinding sunlight

“i only need like half an hour to get ready let me sleep for another fifteen minutes” you drop your head back onto your pillow and shut your eyes again and- “oH jESUS is this going to become a regular thing because i am noT a fan of this” yoongi has you over his shoulder again and when he plops you down you’re staring at your crusty morning face in the bathroom mirror

“You don’t have ingredients in your fridge required for a nutritional breakfast. However, I made a cup of coffee for you. Please come to the kitchen in 20 minutes.” yoongi shuts the washroom door and you see that he’s hung your work uniform up behind it

dang

usually you’re reaching into your hamper and digging through it for your wrinkly blouse and trousers but

you’ve never seen your uniform look so neat and crisp before

and that coffee stain on the sleeve is gone

“alright, robot. you win this time.” you mumble to yourself and then you’re washing up and getting ready for the day

“It is now 7:35. According to my maps, we are ten minutes away from Bangtan Laboratories. I suggest you leave within the next five minutes to avoid tardiness.”

“i’m usually five or ten minutes late and no sane person would want to come check out books at eight in the morning so i’m not in a rush” you plop down on the couch and turn on your cartoons and then you take a sip of the coffee that- “oH good god what the hell is this????” you look down at the sludge in your cup and wince before setting it down on the coffee table

so you definitely need to teach yoongi how to make a cup of coffee if he’s going to be making your coffee for the next 8 months

“Is something the matter?”

“how did you make my coffee??”

“I ground up coffee beans and mixed some water into it. According to my database, coffee is essentially a mixture of C. arabica and water.”

“C. arabi- what is C. ara- okay you know what i’ll teach you how to make coffee when i get back from work today” hopefully you can get jimin to give you a cup of coffee free of charge

you’re trying to enjoy your morning cartoons but it’s hard when yoongi’s kind of just standing there staring at you blankly

“…wanna watch some cartoons with me?” you scoot over a little and pat the seat next to you

“It is now 7:38. I recommend that you leave in two minutes to avoid-.”

“this episode is nearly done just come and sit” yoongi blinks twice but then he nods and comes and sits next to you

“Do not slouch. It is bad for your posture.”

you let out a sigh and roll your eyes and stand up

“you knoW what you’re right i should leave now thanks for the coffee yoongs” you offer him a smile while you’re lacing your shoes up “uh, i guess you can watch TV all day if you want?? there are a couple books in your room that you can read as well. namjoon picked them out for you so expect some classic literature and poetry and all that jazz”

“My name is Y00NGI. Not ‘Yoongs’.” yoongi blinks at you and you groan internally he’s just so ???????? he’s the complete opposite of you he’s so stiff and orderly and boring but of course you suck it up because you’re doing this for the boys and maybe you can ask jin to tweak his personality a little bit heeehee

“byE yOOnGS” you slam the door behind you before he can respond and you start your walk to work

yoongi stares at the door after you leave and then the corner of his lips twitch up in a small smile

he’s trying to replicate your bright smile but the most he can muster is a teeny little smile

“Yoongs.” he mutters to himself and then he returns his attention to the TV

when you come home that night you are surprised to see that your dinky apartment is,,, spotless

and now that it’s clean it makes it seem like your place is a loT bigger

and wow your coffee table is supposed to be thAt colour?? crazy

“uh, hello? i’m home…” you’re about to kick your shoes off and dump your jacket on the ground and yoongi suddenly appears in front of you and stops you before you can do so

“You have a coat rack for a reason. You also have a shoe rack. Please use them.” you sigh and place your shoes on the rack and hang your jacket up before turning to yoongi and going like r u happy now u neat freak android

“do you eat human food?”

“I don’t. I could. But I prefer not to, otherwise I’ll have to open up my stomach compartment and empty it. Which is not ideal.” you cringe and ur like yuck okay fair enough

“okay, well… i’m going to order dinner for myself, so i guess you can just sit here”

yoongi grabs your wrist before you can scurry off to the drawers where you usually stash all the takeout menus

“I threw out all of your takeout menus. You cannot live off Chinese food and pizza every day.”

“you whA-“ you press your lips together to keep yourself from screaming at yoongi but your preCIOUS MENUS ARE GONE

okay look

he cleaned your apartment for you which was actually pretty nice of him

but

piZZA!!!!!

“I ordered groceries while you were gone. Your fridge is now stocked with fruits, vegetables, almond milk - everything’s natural and organic, and most importantly - good for you.”

“almond milk- yOongi look that was really nice of you and stuff but i’m not- i don’t drink nUT milk i drink cow milk and also??? i hate fruits and i hate vegetables”

“I can see that, considering the state of your skin.” Yoongi hums and his eyes light up before he scans over your face slowly “Mild acne. Very common. The lack of pizza will hopefully clear up your skin soon. You’re looking a little swollen in the face, too. Must be all the sodium. Come - I’ve steamed some vegetables for you.”

yoongi disappears into the kitchen and you’re standing there like

eXCUSE YOU

you turn and look into the mirror hanging by the door and u know what he’s right you’re looking a lil more bloated than usual and your skin is kind of splotchy and woW that pimple wasn’t there this morning

your period’s coming!!! so that’s your excuse to pig out a little because you always need junk food for your cramps    

you know what you’re going to give that robot a piece of your mind and show him who’s boss here because it certainly isn’t hiM

“okay, listen here-“ you swing open the kitchen door and storm over to yoongi who’s standing by the stove with your steamed vegetables “i know you’re supposed to be taking care of me and everything but i refuse to eat these damn vegetables because- mmph!”

yoongi shoves a floret of broccoli into your mouth and you automatically chew

oh

this isn’t half bad

there’s some minced garlic in here

mm

“Sit. Eat.” yoongi nudges you to sit down on the stool and sets the plate of veggies in front of you “Finish it all.”

your stomach grumbles and you frown a little

you were really craving some juicy fried chicken tonight

maybe some yam fries with that really good chipotle mayo

dang

as soon as you finish your dinner (which was a lot better than u thought it’d be) you dial namjoon’s number into your phone and look over your shoulder to make sure yoongi isn’t there

“hello?”

“your robot just made me eat a plate of vegetables”

“he did? wow! he’s better than i thought he’d be because you never eat vegetables”

“wha- namjoon, the point here is that he’s being a control freak!! i want pizza!!”

“it’s all part of the test, y/n. if there’s a flaw in his system we’ll fix it up when you bring him in at the end of the month.”

“oh, there are pLenty of flaws in his system. i’d like to take a pair of scissors and just snIP-“

“Ahem. Put your plate into the dishwasher when you’re done. And I’m cutting off your phone usage. According to my database, you’re on your phone most hours of the day.”

“you’re not my dad so-“ all of a sudden yoongi grabs your phone from you and shuts it off and then he’s pointing to the dishwasher

he’s literally acting like your dad and it’s infuriating

“give me my phone!” you ignore him and hold your hand out for your phone “who do you think you are??”

“Y00NGI. Who are you?”

“i-“ okay you should’ve seen that coming “just gimme my phone!!”

unsurprisingly

this little argument ends with you not getting your phone and you being sent into your room early

you feel like a child and it’s ridiculous

and you can’t even complain to namjoon about his stupid android because said android hAS your phone

“It is 7:00AM. You have work in an hour.”

it feels like deja vu when you wake up to the sound of that monotonous voice and the feeling of someone ripping a blanket off of you and also your blinds are up so the sun is bLINDING you

“it’s 7am you have work in an hour” you mock grumpily and yelp when yoongi smacks you with a pillow

and so

you and yoongi fall into this routine

he wakes you up

you grumble curses at him

you go to work

you come back home

yoongi’s there with your dinner

yoongi scolds you for watching cartoons

yoongi scolds you for sneaking some chips onto your dinner plate

yoongi catches you with a pint of ice cream in your grubby little hands  

how??? did he not catch that??

maybe if he was more observant he would’ve noticed that one of your boobs was significantly bigger than the other

yoongi clicks the TV off and sends you to wash up

you go to bed

yoongi cleans up the living room and puts the ice cream away

yoongi heads to his charging pod for the night and powers off

two weeks go by and you have to admit that you’ve gotten pretty used to having yoongi there 24/7

finally the day comes where you have to bring yoongi into the lab so namjoon can see if everything’s running smoothly

“aren’t you excited?? this is your first time out!!”

“There are more productive things that I could be doing right now. You interrupted me while I was uploading the entire Oxford dictionary into my hard drive.” even though you have your fingers wrapped around yoongi’s wrist and you’re tugging pretty hard to get him to move faster he’s still moving as slow as a snail so that’s gr8 for u

“you can upload it to your brain when we head back to my place. namjoon needs to see you so it’s not really my fault” you push him into the lift and he turns around and scowls at you

“Why do you manhandle me like that? Just because I’m a robot doesn’t mean you can treat me like this. Didn’t you notice the ‘fragile’ sticker on my box?” you’re tempted to roll your eyes because you’ve come to realise that yoongi can be very dramatic sometimes but like

he makes a fair point

you haven’t really been the nicest person to him in the last two weeks

he just

gets on your nerves!!!!!!!

“fair enough. i’m sorry. i think i… i was just kind of offended that namjoon wanted you to take care of me because i’m like… a grown woman and it’s embarrassing.”

yoongi blinks at you and then turns to face the doors as the elevator goes up “There’s nothing to be embarrassed about. I’m just here to help you. Plus, you need someone to take care of you. You can’t just eat pizza every night for dinner. And you can’t just wash your face with water and hand soap every night.”

……he makes a fair point once again

“Y00NGI, if you could just lie down here that would be great” namjoon points to the silver bed and you’re like low-key scared because it looks like an operating table

yoongi lies down and makes himself comfortable and rests his hands on his stomach

“i’m just going to be performing a basic electroencephalogram on you. i’m putting you to sleep now.”

a basic electroelephant-what-gram

you want to ask namjoon what the hell an electroscopicphahalalagram is but he looks pretty focused right now

yoongi’s eyes flutter shut and hoseok and jin work to place the small metal discs on his scalp and they’re all hooked up to some machines

suddenly a bunch of what you’re assuming to be yoongi’s statistics appear on namjoon’s monitor screen

all the information on there would be normal for a human except for the B A T T E R Y : 8 7 % part

“what’s that? and that? and that?”

namjoon’s been friends with you for a loNg long time so he’s learned to just drown you out whenever you get…. annoying

“is that his heartbeat? it’s pretty slow. what’s his heart made of? does he even have a heart? also - i have a question” you raise your hand and look around at the other boys expecting them to ask you what your question is but they never do

“i have a qUES-“

“wHAT y/n what is your question??” namjoon spins around and glares at you and you smile at him sheepishly

“if i cut yoongi open would he bleed??”

that’s

slightly concerning

“i’m sorry what”

“what i’m asking is does yoongi have.. like… human.. bodily fluids too…”

“i mean, like, yes? and no? his pee isn’t actually pee like if you gave him water to drink then he would just pee out water and maybe some motor oil if he has a loose screw but ya that’s it”

“oH you know what though i actually, uh,” taehyung stifles a laugh “okAy look i wanted to make him more realistic so like i bought a bottle of… fake semen and so there’s a little tank of semen inside of yoongi”

namjoon groans and turns to look at the younger boy “i told you not to!!!”

“i’m sorry!!!! i couldn’t help myself!!!! i promise it’s the good stuff tho like you can swallow it and it wouldn’t even-”

“oH my god i’m not talking about this. y/n, yoongi bleeds and kind of pees. and apparently he can ejaculate now.”

“so if you ever wanna hop on that diCK feel free to-“

“sHUT UP what if he can hear you!!!!” you slap your hands over yoongi’s ears “and yoongi isn’t even my type so i would never hoP on that dick”

that’s a blatant lie if yoongi hit on you at a club u would immediately drop to your knees

“stop talking about my android’s dick!!!!! whY did we even give him a dick in the first place!!!!”

“i had sO much fun moulding his dick out like lemme tell ya it’s just 7 inches of puRe girth-“

“STOP”

eventually everyone gets back to work and you’re entertaining yourself by spinning yourself around and around on a stool and also jimin gave you a pair of stethoscopes to play with and jin gave you a lollipop to suck on

(ur a literal child)

namjoon nods to himself because everything’s going according to plan

in fact yoongi is picking things up much faster than he thought

“emotional development is good.. heY look at that he’s already learned a couple new emotions!!!”

and you’re like ! dang he’s a fast learner what did he learn

you wheel over so that you’re right next to yoongi

“one of his new emotions are... irritation”

…..

THIS BITCH

you reach over and smack his cheek gently and ur like >:-) because he’s sleeping and he can’t feel you poking and prodding at him you can do whatever you want to take your frustrations out

“Could you be so kind as to release my face?” you jump when yoongi powers up out of nowhere and you’re just sitting there squishing his cheeks together

“why is your new emotion irritation?”

“Because i’ve been feeling it a lot as of late.”

“why?”

“I just have.”

“why?”

“…Because of a particular individual.”

“who?”

yoongi’s eye twitches and namjoon’s like lol because he can see the negative emotion bar rising higher and higher on the screen

“aLright alright cut it out y/n” jin scowls and pulls you away from yoongi before you have the opportunity to pull all the metal discs off his scalp

yoongi finds you absolutely infuriating

out of ALL the humans in the world he could’ve been assigned to

why did you have to be HIS human

you’re messy

lazy

irresponsible (he’s pretty sure you only have your job because you’re good friends w namjoon)

loud

manipulative

when he feels his hard drive overheating he tells himself to calm down

only a couple more months to go and then he can actually go and do something worth his time

like helping out at a hospital

working at a bank

maybe become like a teacher’s assistant or something

somEthing that helps society

helping a twenty something year old pick up her animal crackers off the floor is not a way to help society

“yoongi have you seen my reading glasses” yoongi’s in the middle of drying off the dishes when you pop into the kitchen “because i swear i left them in here but they’re not in here so then i thought they were in my bedroom but they’re not in my bedroom sO theN-“

“They’re on your head.”

“oh!!! ur right teehee”

yoongi grips onto the dish so hard it cracks a little

seven and a half more months

seven and a half

a month goes by and guess what

it’s that time again folks

you have to be an Adult and actually Socialize with your Adult Friends

you’re heading out with a couple of gal friends from your school days tonight

you know what though you’re just glad that you get a couple of hours away from yoongi

you’re kind of in a like-hate relationship with him

like you appreciate that he’s always there for you and he does a great job taking care of you and making sure you don’t spend too much time with your face in front a screen or overdose on animal crackers

but like

he’s alwAys hovering over you

like just now you were getting ready to do your makeup and yoongi was kind of just hanging out in the hallway pretending to dust the floors but you know it’s just because he doesn’t want you to accidentally stab your eyeball with your mascara wand again

it was pretty nasty cleaning black ink out of your eyeball  

also

side note

knowing that yoongi knows your exact location at any given moment is kind of creepy

and you kind of just wanna have a goOd time tonight okay

you look down at the bracelet around your wrist and watch the Y00NGI blink back at you

you consider smashing the damn thing to pieces because it is just made out of glass

you give it a test tap on the edge of the counter

clink

hm

your eyes widen when you see a teeny weeny little crack

huh

you raise your arm about to literally smash your wrist into the counter when suddenly

“Make sure to stay hydrated. Drink water after you consume alcohol of any kind.” yoongi appears behind you in the mirror and you quickly pull your arm back down and pretend like you’re just stretching out your limbs

“i know, yoongs. i’ve gone out partying before.”

“Who are you going out with?”

“a couple of girls i went to school with - you don’t know them” you purse your lips and apply a layer of lip gloss and yoongi watches you in the mirror

“I don’t know them?”

“of course you don’t know them you’ve never met them” you scoff

yoongi’s eyes turn into a shade of blue and if you look close enough you can see digits whizzing around in there

and suddenly

“Emma, Lauren, Hailey, Anna, and… Faith.”

your eyebrows furrow and you turn to face him

“how the hell did you-“

“Hailey seems to be a fan of partying. Be careful. Out of all of these girls the only one that is acceptable is Faith. I trust her. I have faith in her.”

jin must’ve snuck some kind of dad joke implant into yoongi because that was awful

yoongi turns and leaves the washroom and you’re like ????? how?????wat???? how did?????

about twenty minutes later you’re all dolled up and ready to go and you see yoongi rifling through your purse as you enter the living room

“i’ll take that, thank u very much” you snatch your purse from him and swing it over your shoulder before going to get your heels

“I was just making sure you have everything you need.”

“what do i need?”

“Tissues. Chapstick. A bottle of water. Your wallet. Your identification card. Your house keys.” he pauses for a second and then looks back at the tv “A pack of that godawful fruity, sugary gum you like so much.”

your heart warms a little that he packed your things for you anD he’s actually letting you have your juicy fruit gum

maybe you shouldn’t smash your bracelet into pieces

also jungkook did say it was expensive so there’s that

you slip into your heels and check to make sure you don’t have any lip gloss in your teeth in the mirror  

“What time should I expect your return?”

“when i come back” you respond simply and shut the door behind you and scurry over to the elevator as quickly as possible to avoid more of yoongi’s nagging

“Pushing the button aggressively like that will not make the elevator move any faster.” you groan quietly and turn around to see yoongi poking his head out of the front door at the end of the hall

the doors open and you shoot him a quick thumbs up before getting in

“Always carry your belongings with you. Do not accept drinks from strangers. Be aware of-“

when the doors close you’re like thANK god because your head could’ve exploded from yoongi’s irritating tips

he’s acting like you’ve never gone out a day in your life

sometimes you forget how rambunctious your girl-friends are

“i’m sorry you bought a whAt” you tilt your head in curiosity and hailey leans in a little more

you’ve been at the bar for like ten minutes and the conversation topic has already swerved into the ~sexual zone~

“i said i bouGHT A SEX BOT” everyone bursts into giggles and you’re like ohHH gotcha “i honestly don’t even need to hook up with anyone anymore because my bot totally does the job - thank god for technology. he’s better than all the boyfriends i’ve ever had - and he makes reALLY good pancakes in the morning”

“cheers for technology!!” emma raises her glass and everyone follows suit and clinks glasses

you didn’t even know sex bots were a thing

all the prostitutes in town must be fuming

“sex bot…” you trail off and now u can’t help but wonder if namjoon’s ever made a sex bot

…is yoongi supposed to be yOUR sex bot

“but like… u don’t think that’s kinda weird?? being in a relationship with a robot and all that” you purse your lips and everyone looks at you weirdly

“y/n - what’s wrong with you, girl? this is the 21st century! a robot-human relationship nowadays is totally normal” anna snorts and takes a sip of her drink

“ya but the relationship you’re talking about is purely a sexual relationship…. what about like,,, a real relationship” you purse your lips before reaching for the small bowl of peanuts in the middle

“i mean i don’t really see the problem with that tbh like date who you wanna date even if your significant other is made out of metal”

“hey, y/n! maybe if your little crush on jungkook doesn’t work out we can get a sex bot for you”

“i doN’t- i don’t want a sex bot, thanks” you laugh awkwardly and scratch the back of your neck

“why not!!!! it’s been like a trillion years since u got laid”

“i,,, i know but i’m not like actively seeKing to get laid i just… i been busy u know how it be”

it’s true!! you’ve been super busy

sex hasn’t really been a priority

plus one night stands really aren’t ur thing

you can’t see yourself having sex with a stranger

it’s just so

intimate

“you have to get yourself out there!!!! otherwise your pussy’s going to dry up and shrivel up into nothing” you wince at the crude language spilling out of emma’s mouth and ur like u know what i think my… i think my pee-pee is doing just fine

“seriously tho!!! c’mon you should live a little~! let’s find a cutie for you tonight to take home” lauren grins and looks over at the bar “how about the bartender?? he was totally checking out ur boobs when we were over there”

“you guys i- no, i’m really not…”

it’s pretty obvious you’re kind of uncomfortable by the way you’ve shrunken into yourself and started gnawing on your bottom lip

“hey hey hEy okay maybe not!” faith slaps lauren’s arm and she scowls in pain “let’s just have a girls night, hm? let’s just get wASted and not think about stupid boys for once!!! the guys here aren’t even thAT hot - second round of drinks are on me!” she waves a server over and hailey automatically orders a round of shots for the table

“thanks for that” you murmur quietly and nudge faith’s side after the conversation changes from you getting laid to lauren and hER desire for a sex bot too

“don’t mention it” she hums and reaches over to pinch your cheek

so

turns out these drinks are actually preTty strong and everyone’s tolerance for alcohol is preTty low

an hour later

everyone is a hot fuckign mess

“lizten listen listen n to me faithy honey taehyUng is totally into you but hshhshhhh dont’ tell him don’t tell him he’ll kill me if i tell you” you slur and slap a hand over faith’s mouth when you see her face light up with excitement

“omg reALLy because i’m super into him too he’s sO attractive” she squeals excitedly “but like did he teLL you that he was into me because it totally doesn’t count if it’s just a rumour”

“oh NO it’s like it’s like for sure real like i went into his office and he was fully jacking off to your instagram pictures” you hiccup and in the back of ur mind u know you’ve exposed a little too much but it’s too late now

and faith doesn’t exactly seem to mind learning that tidbit of information

“…..i’M GONNA SEND HIM A NUDE”

“nO” you snatch faith’s phone and put it on the other side of the table

“how do you make such hot friends?? i want hot boy-friends!!!!” nicole whines and downs the rest of her drink

“maybe weEEEE should all apply for jobs at bangtan laboratories”

“dibs on jin and his broad shoulders!!!!!”

“well if you take jin i’m taking jiMIN”

“i wANT JIMIN,, anD junGKOOK”

“i want jungkook’s kOOk”  

“i wanna get all up in namjoon’s dimplez he’s so cute ”

“well i want namjoon to get all up in MY GUTS”

“i’m taking hoseok!!!!!!”

“i will FIGHT YOU FOR HIM”

“I WANT THEM ALL”

another hour goes by…

[jeopardy theme song plays in the background]

“lOOK look it’s like fused to me and jungkook is the only one with the key” you raise your wrist so everyone can see your Y00NGI bracelet

“so like…….. you got a robot helper at home”

“ya”

“and he knows where u are all the time and ur temperature and ur heart rate and all that”

“ya”

“yoU shouldn’t- youshoulnd’t let these MEN control you like thiz” faith hiccups and you nod quickly in agreement

she grabs your wrist and flails it around “this bracelet don’t even gO with any outfits it’s so stupid”

“i don’t even- i should just smash it into smithereens” you slur and rest your head on her shoulder

all of you exchange looks and then everyone’s looking at the glass bracelet on your wrist

there is that little crack in it from when you tried smashing it earlier

“smash it” anna whispers

and then it starts

the satanic chanting

“smash it, smash it, smash it, smASH IT SMASH IT SMACHI T SMASHCIT SMASCHITSMACIHT” everyone’s slamming their glasses down on the table rhythmically

with all the energy in the atmosphere and the mojitos coursing through your veins you find yourself raising your arm and suddenly

huLK smASH

you grin when you raise your wrist and shake off the shattered shards of glass and everyone whoops and clinks glasses again

wow

giRL POWER

meanwhile

yoongi perks up immediately and blinks twice

it feels like a wire short-circuited inside of him somewhere

hm

it’s about 2:57 now

it’s very very late

now would be a good time to check up on you

he checked on you about an hour ago

you seemed fine but he could sense a loT of alcohol flowing through your veins

hopefully you’re hydrating yourself with water and not just mojitos

okay time to check up on u

…

…

…

nothing

okay

no need to panic

maybe the bracelet glitched or something

he can track you via your phone

…

…

…

there’s no signal

your phone must be out of fuckign battery agAIN

you never charge it!!!! why!!!!

okay great

what’s the plan

he jumps when his phone suddenly starts ringing and he notices it’s FaceTime call request from an unknown number

he lets out a sigh of relief when your pixelated face suddenly appears on the screen

“yoongi!!!!!!”

“Y/N? Whose phone are you-“

“my phone is outta battery and also i broke my bracelet because you mEN can’t control me”

he hears a lot of giggling in the background

“What? Control you? The purpose of your bracelet is so that I can check up on- Oh my god.” you raise your wrist in triumph to reveal a couple loose wires wrapped around it and yoongi’s like o…..o no “Namjoon is going to kill you.”

you hiccup and lean against anna’s shoulder

“i gotta pee”

“Are you on your way back now?”

“are you on your way back now?”

“I’m serious, Y/N. It’s almost 3 in the morning.”

“i’m seriouz y/n i’s almost threeeee in the morning”

yoongi lets out a sigh and pinches the bridge of his nose

you’re a mess and you’re in no state to come home by yourself so late into the night

“I’m coming to pick you up.”

“u don’t know where i AM”

“I always know where you are. Stay put. And go pee.”

yoongi fishes your car keys out of the side drawer and tucks his phone into his back pocket

…

…

…

DRIVING 101 MANUAL: DOWNLOAD COMPLETE

okay cool now he knows how to drive

“you’re right he IS cute” anna gasps after yoongi hangs up on you

“right??? if hE hit on me tonight i would totally go home with him” you grin and hand hailey back her phone

“his lips are real pretty”

“his hair looks so soft”

“and that voice??? sO sexy are you kidding me???”

“i wish someone would take care of me like yoongi takes care of y/n :’((”

“you guys stop talking about y/n’s manz like that!!!”

“he is not- he is most definitely noT my mans” you laugh and shake your head

okay well like

he kinda is your mans

but he’s not at the same time

you felt a twinge of jealousy after all ur friends started gushing about how cute yoongi is

ahem

“how about one last round of shOTs before yoongi the party pooper comes n gets me!!!!” you change the subject and everyone bursts into cheers

one last round of shots turn into three last rounds of shots so

everyone’s stumbling in their heels when you guys finally leave the bar

lauren has an arm wrapped around your waist keeping you stable because your alcohol tolerance is the lowest out of everyone’s

and then you see a familiar looking bot heading towards you

“yOONGs my prince in scarily realistic silicone skin!!!!!!!!” you practically throw yourself at yoongi when you see him and immediately press wet kisses to his cheek

he’s not surprised that you’re an affectionate drunk

“Alright, alright. Where’s your purse?” you’re like aLL over yoongi and his eyes are going crazy trying to keep track of you

“i dunNo i want a piggyback ride” thank god yoongi was programmed to have superhuman reflexes because if he didn’t then you definitely would have fallen flat on your butt

yoongi sighs before reaching back to clasp under your knees and he accidentally gropes your butt before his hands quickly slip back under your knees and you can’t help but giggle

“buy me dinner before u touch me there u naughty boy”

“Where’s your p-“

“y/n, don’t forget your- oh!!! oh!!! you must be yoOngi!!!!” yoongi’s suddenly overwhelmed when a group of tipsy girls approach him

he does a quick scan of each of their faces and recognises them as your friends

“Yes, I’m Y00NGI. M1N Y00NGI, Y/N’s personal human mind model adaptive super android.” he likes to keep it professional when meeting new people

“well, min yoongi. here’s y/n’s purse.” yoongi expects you to reach out and take it yourself under he realises you’ve fallen asleep and you’re definitely drooling on his shoulder “sorry about y/n - we let her get a little crazy tonight.”

“yoU’re just as hot as y/n said you were!!!!” yoongi blushes immediately and diverts his gaze before letting out a small chuckle

he’s definitely going to use that against you when you sober up tho lmao

he turns his head and his nose nudges into your cheek making you stir before you’re nuzzling your nose into his neck obviously seeking warmth

“Should I call you ladies a cab?”

“oh, and he’s a gentleman too. i need me one of these yoongi’s.”

“we’re fine, thank you. we already called for an uber. thank you for taking care of y/n for us. we were kind of worried about her after her breakup with kihyun, but it’s nice to see that she’s in good hands.” lauren smiles and places a hand on yoongi’s shoulder

yoongi nods and offers her a smile

“It was nice meeting all of you. Have a safe trip home.”  

“Y/N, wake up…” yoongi gently grasps your arm and shakes you a little

you let out a soft sigh and your nose wrinkles and yoongi’s like o,,,,oh my….. how cute,,,… wait waT is wrong w mE omg

“C’mon, we gotta get you out of your dress and brush your teeth and all that.”

you whine and shake your head before settling even further into the front seat

yoongi sighs and shoves the car keys into his back pocket before bending down and scooping you up in his arms

you immediately melt against his chest as he wraps one of your arms around his neck

yoongi winces when he accidentally knocks your head against the frame of your bedroom door

“You better not have a random leg spasm otherwise you’ll take out one of my eyes.” yoongi mutters and takes your heels off before setting them aside

somehow he manages to change (peel) you out of your dress and he wipes your makeup off aND he brushes your teeth anD he puts on your moisturiser without you waking up

you truly are a deep sleeper

he tucks you into bed and he’s about to leave the room when suddenly you’re reaching out and gripping onto his wrist

“Out of all the moments to wake up, you wake up now?” yoongi teases and bends down next to you

“stay with me” you pout and tug on his wrist and yoongi feels his fake heart go boom boom

he brushes some of your hair out of your face and lets out a sigh “I have to charge up.”

“my app told me u were at 76% when i last checked” you pat the empty side of the bed “stay with me”

somehow yoongi finds himself settling into bed next to you and he kinda just lies there like a statue

“u have to get under the blankets fool” yoongi sighs and tucks himself under the blankets

and he’s 110% sure you’re still a little tipsy because the next thing he knows you’re snuggling up to him

“you’re warm”

“Thanks. It’s my generator.” he clears his throat and shifts to get a little more comfortable  

you don’t respond and he assumes you’ve already fallen asleep

“thanks for taking care of me all the time”

yoongi lies awake the entire night feeling a little warmer than usual

“okay, we re-modified your bracelet. now, instead of glass, we used a basically indestructible metal. we should’ve gone with the metal in the first place because this particular type is a pretty good conductor which means faster connections and-“

“but this one’s ugly the glass one was prettier” you interrupt namjoon and scrunch your nose at the chunky metal bracelet around your wrist

“…well you should’ve thought about that before smashing it into pieces”

“my friends are very convincing” you mutter sheepishly and twist the bracelet around your wrist before tracing your fingers over the engraved Y00NGI

jungkook comes over and takes your wrist to look at the bracelet and you can’t help but feel your heart go boom boom a littLe because he’s standing so close to you right now omg

you’re swinging your legs back and forth and you have your bottom lip tucked in between your teeth as you watch jungkook fiddle with the bracelet

yoongi glances at you and furrows his brows a little

he’s already synced up to your bracelet so he should be able to…

yEp

your endorphins are shooting through the roof right now

yoongi feels an unfamiliar emotion bubbling inside of him

oh

it’s jealousy

“The bracelet’s already synced up to me. I don’t think you need to look at it anymore.” yoongi steps in between you and kook and he tilts his head at jungkook and jungkook’s like ohHO okay well i’m just doing my job

“kook get over here and help me with these damn triplex wires” jin calls jungkook over and he excuses himself but looks at yoongi a little weirdly

“what was that?? we were totally vibing”

“If by ‘vibing’, you mean you drooling over Jungkook while he fiddled with your bracelet - then yes, you were totally vibing.”

you scoff and look at yoongi before leaning back a little and crossing your arms

“Why are you looking at me like that?”

“are you jealous of jungkook?”

yoongi trips over his words and he refuses to look you in the eye

“That’s ridiculous. Why would I ever be jealous of Jungkook? What is there to be jealous of?”

“you know… you’re the only human mind model adaptive super android for me, right?” you coo and reach up to pinch yoongi’s cheek and then he’s growling and swatting your hand away

you find yourself finally warming up to yoongi as time passes

you start enjoying his company instead of dreading it

and he feels the same way

:~)

maybe the next couple of months won’t be too bad after all

you’re in the middle of cataloguing some new books that just came in when suddenly you feel someone hovering over you

“hi can i help you find som-“ you look up and stop talking when you see /??? yoongi?? behind the counter

“what the- how did you- how are you here right now??” you furrow your brows in confusion and yoongi plops a little bento box on the countertop

“Public transportation. Eat. You’re hungry.”

“i’m not-“ your stomach growls right on cue and yoongi gives you a pointed look before opening up the bento box

“Pork and vegetable dumplings, and pan-fried chive pancakes. The dipping sauce is here. I added some sesame oil, soy sauce, and sriracha to the vinegar because you seem to like that combination. Animal crackers for later. Later. And a juice box. The flavour is organic apple and grape.” your stomach growls again at the sight of this goOD food and you swear you almost start drooling

“aw yoongs you didn’t have to make all of this for me…” yoongi hands you a pair of chopsticks

“Yes, I did. Otherwise, you’d be having a chocolate bar and a can of coke for lunch. I’ll go home now.” yoongi turns to leave and before you know it you quickly lean over the countertop and grab his arm

yoongi stops and looks down at your hand gripping his arm before looking back up at you

“wAit maybe you,,, you can stay here? with me? i’m all alone here and i’m sure there’s not a lot to do at home besides cook and clean and all that.” you clear your throat when yoongi tilts his head and blinks owlishly at you “or,,, not…”

“No. I’ll stay. And then we can go home together.”

home

usually he says ‘your place’ or something like that like from that night you broke your bracelet

but he just said ‘home’

“C’mon, eat up. I didn’t slave over the stove for nothing.” yoongi joins you behind the desk and immediately picks up the thickEst book from the pile that you were reorganising before he got there “History of Korea…”

you shove a dumpling into your mouth and your eyes roll to the back of your head because goddAmn this is good

you are fully having a foodgasm right now

just when you’re about to shove a second dumpling into your mouth you jump when you hear the sound of a book slapping shut

“Well, that was interesting. What other books can I read?”

wat

you turn to look at yoongi and he’s rifling through the other books on your desk

“wait- you- did you finish reading that already???” there are question marks floating above your head because you aRE conFuSIoN

yoongi responds with a hum and picks up a second book

this one’s the history of russia

“I think I’ll read all the history books today.”

“all of- yoongi there are like 1000 or moRe history books in this library i doubt you’ll be able to read them all” you snort and dip your dumpling in some sauce

about twenty minutes later your stomach is full of dumplings and chive pancakes and you couldn’t be happier

you’re leaning back against your chair and patting your stomach happily and yoongi’s having a good time sitting next to you with his nose in a book

“So how many books have you read in the last twenty minutes? 500?” you snort while packing up the box and putting everything back into the lunch bag

“Nah, I’m still on book 496.” yoongi sighs and shuts the book “I’m not fully charged and it’s messing with my speed.”

“I believe that’s 10 points to me, and 0 to you.” yoongi smirks when another paper ball lands right into the bin and you groan in frustration

you finished cataloguing the books faster than you thought and that’s how you ended up having a paper ball throwing competition with yoongi

it was his suggestion surprisingly

but now you know he only suggested it because he would win the competition

you probably should’ve taken into account that he can calculate the perfect angle and the perfect speed at which to throw the ball at

“this is a dumb game”

“No, it’s not. Throw your ball into the waste bin.”

yoongi scowls when you throw your ball at his head and in retaliation he leaps over and immediately begins to dig his fingers into your sides

“yOONGI stop!!!!!” there are tears in your eyes from how hard you’re laughing and you crumple to the floor in defeat bringing yoongi down with you

yoongi laughs but eventually shows some mercy and stops tickling you

and now the two of you are realising that he is very much on top of you

you’re both kind of panting and your cheeks flush a little when he tilts his head and smirks

“you’re mean”

“I’ve been told.”

“Give me the keys, I’ll drive.”

“it’s my car i’m driving”

“You drive like a maniac. Keys.” arguing with yoongi never ends well for you so you grumble before plopping your keys into his open palm

you hear the beep beep of your car unlocking and yoongi opens your door for you

“ah, thank you, kind sir” you get in and toss your purse into the back before reaching down to take your shoes off

“Seatbelt… m’lady.” yoongi slams his door shut and you buckle your seatbelt and lean against the window

“Where are we going now?”

“We’re heading back home, obviously.”

there it is again

‘home’

his eyes flicker up to where you’re flipping and unflipping the sun-visors

“Stop doing that.” he reaches up and slams it shut and you pout then lean back against the seat again

yoongi thinks you might actually have the mentality of a six year old child

“Wha- What is this?” after putting your shoes away and hanging your coat up yoongi walks into the living room and sees you sprawled out on the couch with your eyes glued to the screen watching some duMb brain-melting cartoon show

“spongebob squarepants reruns.” you answer simply and shift your position until you’re upside down lying flat on your back with your legs hanging off the top of the couch

your face is turning red from all the blood going right to your head

ur an idiot

“You are not watching this. You should watch something more educational.”

“i’ve been out of school for like two years i don’t- hEeeeEy” you start whining immediately when yoongi grabs the remote and switches it to the national geographic channel

omG all these documentaries are so boring

“Here, this one. It’s called… Beneath the Water.” he pauses and you recognise his thinking face

his thinking face is when he blanks out and like downloads a shit ton of information into his database  

“Beneath the Water is a mini documentary-series focusing on the history of mythological, underwater creatures. Tonight’s episode is about mermai-“

“mermaids??? jesus yoongi how old do u think i am”

“You were just watching Spongebob Squarepants.”

you grumble out a ‘touché’ and switch positions so you’re actually sitting on the couch

“I’ll go and make dinner.” you watch yoongi disappear into the kitchen and you immediately reach for the remote

“Don’t even try!”

oh my GoD

yoongi’s like a babysitter from hell

“…i hate documentaries” you mutter to yourself but you don’t seem to have a choice so you lean back and make yourself comfortable

spongebob squarepants scene transition ~wun hour latier~

yoongi has to remind you to chew your food because your attention is fully on the documentary right now

he has his elbow propped up on the arm of the couch and he’s just watching you sitting cross-legged behind the coffee table with your stir-fried vegetables and fried (brown) rice ((because it’s healthier and has less sugar))

he smiles to himself when he sees you try to feed yourself while keeping your eyes on the screen

a carrot chunk falls off your chopsticks but you stick the chopsticks in your mouth anyway and you??? start chewing??? yoongi’s staring at you and he’s like there’s nothing in your moUTH

“Maybe you can continue watching the documentary after you finish your dinner.” you literally growl at yoongi when he reaches for the remote and he raises his hands in defence immediately

“Your rice is getting cold. Eat up.” yoongi sighs when you shove like three grains of rice into your mouth and the rest of it spills onto the table 

“Okay, I didn’t think it would have to come to this.”

yoongi gets off the couch and squeezes in next to you and pulls your plate and your bowl towards him

“what are you doing??” you whine because your food is being snaTCHED

“I’m feeding you because you’re incapable of feeding yourself. The sun’s going to come up by the time you finish your meal and you need to be in bed in an hour and a half. You haven’t showered yet, either. Open.” yoongi holds up a hearty spoonful of rice and you’re hesitant at first because now you really feel like a baby and you feel kinda silly but then he’s nudging it against your lips and you open your mouth automatically

and of course your head turns right back to the screen while you eat happily

…actually you could probably get used to this lol

you are now realising how lazy you are

hm

one month later

it’s a lazy friday night and you and yoongi are in the middle of a documentary marathon but of course you got distracted and started talking about something else

you two were actually supposed to go out tonight (there’s this adorable ice cream parlour you’ve been begging yoongi to go to) but then yoongi predicted that it was going to rain because apparently ‘Humidity levels are at 75% right now.’

“so the vine goes ‘road work ahead? yeah, i sure hope it does’!” you burst into laughter and when you calm down yoongi’s staring at you like you’re crazy “don’t you get it? because the sign said that the road works ahead and-“

“Yep. I get it. I just don’t get it, you know? Is this what humans find humorous?”

“well ya i guess so”

“Oh. What a sad, sad world we live in.”

okay so yoongi obviously isn’t a fan of vine humour

maybe you can find something else to talk about

“did namjoon make like a girl version of you?? maybe he’s making a lil girlfriend for you back at the lab” you wink and nudge his side playfully

“I did overhear a conversation between Namjoon and Seokjin about creating a female version of me. M1N Y00NJI will be her name, I believe.”

“oh. so she’s not a girlfriend, she’s like… she’s like your sister”

“Yes. And incest is highly inappropriate.”

“and super gross.”

“And super gross.” yoongi nods in agreement

there’s a moment of silence and the two of you stare at the documentary playing on the screen until yoongi breaks the silence

“Do you have a significant other?”

“me? oh god, no. i mean, like, i used to, but then-“

“It’s okay. I know all about him. You don’t have to explain.” yoongi hands you the bowl of popcorn when you reach out and make grabby hands at it

another moment of silence goes by

“Do you have feelings for Jungkook?”

now thAt gets your attention

you clear your throat and turn to face yoongi before pursing your lips

you were pretty sure you still had a teeny weeny crush on jungkook but you’re 100% confident that it’s not as intense as it used to be

like sure sometimes you still fantasise about kissing jungkook and holding his hand and all that gooey stuff but like

most of the time you’re with yoongi and in the couple of months that you’ve gotten to know him you realise how thoughtful and sweet and caring he is underneath his cold demeanour

and you had a fleeting thought that maybe your romantic feelings for jungkook had transferred over to yoongi but

well that would be silly

after all

yoongi’s not even human

“i… i mean, kind of? but i know he’d never go for someone like me, so I-“

“Why not?” yoongi keeps staring ahead “You’re very nice. You’re funny. You’re thoughtful. You’re kind. And you always share your snacks with other people even though I know you would much rather hog your crackers and juice to yourself.”

you laugh a little at that and then shrug your shoulders

“i dunno. if he was interested in me then he would’ve made a move but…” you continue rambling and yoongi drowns you out a little

yoongi is in a little bit of a sticky situation

last week he kind of developed a new emotion and he’s not exactly sure what it is

it’s a positive emotion for sure

and for some reason he only feels it when he’s around you

but he knows that it isn’t right

he shouldn’t be feeling like this with you

it’s not appropriate and it’s not fair to you if he suddenly told you that he felt a certain way about you

as disappointing as it is at the end of the day he is just… an android

“You should tell him that you like him. You only live once, you know.” yoongi suddenly cuts you off and he swallows thickly

he already regrets telling you that

“He’s working late at the lab tonight. Maybe you can bring him a drink. You still have the 6-pack of banana milk that you were saving for when he comes over.”

yep

he’s definitely regretting this

he turns to look at you and he can see the gears clicking in your head

he’s not just doing this for you

he’s doing this for himself

seeing you with someone else will help him control this new emotion

so this is a good plan

yep

“i don’t… i don’t know, yoongs. i don’t think it’s a good idea.” you scratch the back of your neck and jump when yoongi turns off the tv suddenly

“Y/N, you have to do this. You like him.”

yoongi is right

you do… like jungkook

…don’t you?

when yoongi shuts the door after you leave he lets out a small breath and ignores the new feeling growing in his chest

he feels a pang of pain within him

but this is good

he can’t be with you and that’s just the way things are

you don’t think you’ve ever run so quickly in your entire life but there you are practically sprinting to the labs in the middle of a fuckign thunderstorm (it was fine the first two minutes and then suddenly there was a rumble and it starting raining cats and dogs) because you’re about to confess your feelings of ~romance~ to jungkook

your heart tingles a little at the thought of jungkook’s smile

and the sound of his laugh

it’s kind of hard to see with the rain pouring down on you and your hair in your eyes but you manage to find your employee card in your wallet

“c’mon, don’t let me down now” you swipe your employee card in the access bar and it blinks from red to green and you hear the kachunk of the front doors unlocking

your shoes squeak down the hallway as you run towards the direction of the genius lab

you slow down as you approach the two white doors and you let out a shaky breath

you can hear jungkook talking to someone and you automatically assume he’s on the phone with taehyung or someone else

this is going to be great

you’re gonna be fine

you have high hopes!!!!

you give yourself a mini pep-talk before nodding confidently and striding towards the white doors

there are little circle-shaped windows on the door and as you walk closer you start to see the top of jungkook’s cute lil head

and just as you’re about to push open the doors

you see it

jungkook and ji-eun

they’re laughing at something but you don’t know what

the smile slowly fades from your face and you feel your heart drop to your stomach

all you notice is her hand on his thigh and the way they’re leaning into each other as they giggle

jungkook’s cheeks are flushed and so are ji-eun’s and he stares at her like…

like he loves her

he’s never looked at you like that before

and suddenly ji-eun’s leaning in and planting her lips against jungkook’s

and for some reason

nothing

you feel nothing

well

that’s a lie

you feel a little twinge of heartbreak because you’ve been crushing on jungkook for so long and he’s woW they are definitely making out right now

as you head back the only boy on your mind is yoongi

because yoongi’s always there for you at the end of the day no matter what

on the trek back home you’re suddenly hit with the depressing thought of ‘well, it happened again. you thought someone liked you and it turns out that they liked someone else aka you got rejected for the millionth time in your life’

that kind of dampens your mood and suddenly

you’re just… really, really sad

why does this always happen to you?

you get your hopes up only to have them shot down at the end

and each time you think something different will happen but you always get the same result

damn

“Hey! How did it g- Woah.” yoongi shoots up from the couch when he hears the front door open and the familiar sound of you kicking your shoes off and tossing your keys on the table

you’re soaking wet from the rain and you’re still clutching the six pack of banana milk to your chest

and usually you greet yoongi when you get home but you’re just silently peeling your jacket off and running a hand through your tangled hair

that can only mean

oh

yoongi knows you more than anything else in the world so he knows that the last thing you want is to talk about what just happened

so he acts natural

“You’re going to catch a cold if you keep standing around like that. Come - I’ll draw a bath for you.” he picks up your wet jacket before grasping your wrist and leading you towards the bathroom

“with bubbles?” you murmur quietly and if yoongi had a heart it would clench right now because he’s never seen you look so defeated before

“With all the bubbles in the entire world.”

yoongi dips his hand into the water to test the temperature before pulling it out and shaking some bubbles off

“Alright, I think we’re good to go.” he gets up off his knees before wiping his hands off on his shirt

you toss the dirty makeup wipe in the bin before reaching down to undo the knot of your robe and yoongi’s like okAy i guess that’s my cue to leave

“I’ll be in the living room. We… we can have ice cream after your bath if you want.”

“strawberry cheesecake?”

“Mhm. Don’t stay in for too long or you’ll become wrinkly.” yoongi shuts the door behind him and heads towards the living room

his goal tonight is to cheer you up from this damn jungkook fiasco

he hates to see you upset

you don’t deserve to have your heart broken

you’re a sweet girl and you’re funny and kind and adorable and yoongi… yoongi really, really has taken a liking to you

he doesn’t know when it happened

but one day when you were telling him about your day he kinda just had a weird feeling

he noticed that he was paying more attention to the way your lips would curl around certain words and the way your nose would crinkle slightly whenever you laugh

it’s been almost six months since he first met you

you with your (still) mismatched socks and your greasy pizza

he shakes his head and hurries to get the living room ready and comfortable for you for after your bath

things are different now.

“you forgot to get my PJs for me so i just grabbed your hoodie out of the hamper” yoongi jumps when he hears your voice from behind him

he turns around and it takes everything within him not to explode from all the uwus right now

your cheeks are rosy and your hair is a lil damp but you look so cute wearing his hoodie and a pair of mismatched fuzzy socks

“Come sit. I have ice cream and a whole line-up of your favourite romantic comedies we can watch.”

“you really know the way to my heart” you sigh happily and plop down next to yoongi and he’s fully aware that he’s overheating a little bit right now

his face is sO hot

about half an hour passes and yoongi figures he’d give it a go

it is good to get your feelings out after all

“So… you gonna tell me what happened?”

“in the movie? haven’t you been paying attention?”

“Not in the movie, dummy. With… Jungkook?”

there’s a moment of silence and you slowly set the tub of ice cream down before clearing your throat

yoongi lowers the volume of the tv

“yeah, i don’t know.. it was stupid of me to think that jungkook would be interested in me so…i dunno i’m not that bummed out about it for some reason??” you scratch the back of your neck and lean back against the couch

there’s another moment of silence before yoongi speaks up

“You should be with someone more compatible with you.” you don’t know if it’s just the light playing tricks on your eyes but you swear you see yoongi’s cheeks heat up a little “According to your common interests, personality type, and even astrological signs - you and Jungkook are a mere 36% romantically compatible.”

“that makes sense….. out of all the boys who’s the most compatible with me? just curious” you lean back against the couch and you can’t help but smile when you see yoongi and his concentration face

he definitely picked it up from you because your eyebrows scrunch together and your lips purse slightly and he’s doing exactly that

“You and Namjoon: 62%. You and Seokjin: 51%. You and Hoseok: 28%. You and Jimin: 72%. You and Taehyung: 69%.” yoongi pauses and he looks like he wants to say something “…Youandme:98%.”

“you know i really thought that joon and i would be more compatible considering we’ve known each other since- wait what”

did he just

you and him??????? are 98% compatible???????/?

the two of you are kind of just staring at each other and for the first time yoongi’s the one who averts his gaze and he reaches up to scratch the back of his neck

woW he really did pick up your habits no wonder you guys are compatible

you like yoongi but he’s a robot and you’re a human and sure in today’s society it’s pretty normal for humans to seek comfort and companionship in an android but you never thought you’d be one of them

like you always saw yourself being with another human that was why you pined after jungkook so much but

what you needed was right in front of you this whole time

and yes you have to admit that at some point in time your feelings for yoongi shifted from platonic to romantic but you thought you were just getting attached because of the lack of romance in your life

and yes you’ve gotten used to yoongi waking you up every morning and sending you off with a cup of coffee and then when you get home he’s always there with dinner and he’s always down to cuddle

and you remember how roboT-y and coldhearted he was eight months ago but he’s a completely different android now

he’s a big softie and he’s sweet and kind and funny and charming

oh god

you like yoongi

but

he’s not even

he’s not even a person he’s a robot

“I’m sorry. That was inappropriate of me. I’m sensing discomfort from you. Please forget I said anything. I must head back and recharge. My battery is low.” yoongi quickly gets up from the couch and before you can say anything he’s dashing off to his room and you can hear him shut the door quietly

you check his app on your phone

his battery is at 72% only

that night you find yourself standing outside of yoongi’s room with your fist raised to the door

you can’t bring yourself to knock because what the heck are you going to say????

you decide that the best thing to do for now is just leave yoongi alone

it’ll be good for the both of you to have a little alone time

let you think things out and all that

yeah

you nod to yourself and head to your bedroom before shutting the door behind you

you’ll see yoongi tomorrow

you wake up by yourself the next morning

your body’s used to waking up early now which is good but a part of you wanted to wake up to see yoongi pushing open your curtains or even getting your clothes ready for you

you make a cup of coffee for yourself and spend about twenty minutes watching some tv and sipping quietly on your coffee

you’re hoping the fact that you’re watching cartoons will lure yoongi out of his room but

nothing

“yoongi? i’m leaving for work now. i’ll see you later?” you’re standing in front of yoongi’s room with your hand on the door handle

you get silence in response

“yoongs?” you push down the door handle and your brows furrow in confusion when you realise the door’s been locked

your heart clenches a little

he’s never locked the door before

he doesn’t even want to talk to you

and you don’t want to bother him and make it worse

fuck

your phone buzzes and you pull it out to see that you have to leave now if you want to be on time

okay

maybe you’ll see him when you come back??

“morning, y/n!” you nearly drop the stack of books in your arms when jungkook appears out of nowhere

“oh, hey kook” you muster a smile and set the books down carefully

“i brought you a coffee and a muffin” he puts it down on the countertop before shooting you a signature smile

and for some reason your heart doesn’t flutter in the same way it usually does because all you can think about it yoongi

“thanks, kook.” you sigh and plop down on your chair “what’s up?”

“you’re a girl, right?”

ouch

you look down at your boobs

“last time i checked, yes”

he blushes and immediately chuckles before scratching the back of his neck

“i-i mean, like, you’re a girl, so you would know what girls like”

“uh-huh”

“since you’re a girl-“

“as you’ve established multiple times”

“where would you want to go? on like, a first date kinda scenario”

huh

this must be for ji-eun

“i’m pretty basic, so a dinner and a movie would suffice! even like a netflix binge at home would make me happy. yoongi and i have been binge watching these nature documentaries and he doesn’t usually want me eating on the couch because one time i accidentally got spaghetti all over the pillows and-“ you immediately cut yourself off and the smile kinda fades from your face

you miss yoongi so much

“um, yeah - dinner and a movie.” you clear your throat and shrug

“you okay?” jungkook furrows his brows and looks at you in a concerned manner

“ya! yeah, i’m fine. sorry, i just… went off on a tangent there.” you laugh nervously

maybe you should tell jungkook about yoongi

but then he’d ask you what happened and you don’t want to have to explain the whole thing to him

it’ll be fine you’ll figure something out

“you should probably head back. thank you for the coffee and the muffin!!”

the rest of the day kind of drags on slowly

you find yourself looking at the clock very frequently waiting for it to hit 5:30 so you can leave and go home and hopefully see yoongi

but you don’t see him when you get back

and you don’t see him the next day

or the next day

or the next day

your concern grows as the days go by

yoongi literally hasn’t come out of his room in days

you decided you’d leave him alone mainly because you didn’t know how to approach the situation yourself

you knocked on his door a couple times to remind him to charge up but each time you were just met with silence

another three days go by and yoongi still hasn’t come out of his room

you’ve been doing everything to try and get him to come out

you turned on all the stoves

you left all the lights on

you even left the door unlocked one night which was terrifying because anyone could just walk in

you also accidentally sliced your finger when you were making a sandwich one afternoon and you were bleeding all over the place but yoongi didn’t rush out with a first aid kit like he usually does

you check your Y00NGI app on your phone everyday and everyday it says he’s 100% charged so at least you don’t have to worry about that

but tonight

something just doesn’t feel right

you’re not exactly sure what it is

you can barely focus on the nature documentary playing on the TV

you twist your bracelet around your wrist and you’re like okay that’s it i gotta check on yoongi

you open all the kitchen drawers and finALLy find the key to yoongi’s room

“yoongi? i’m coming in,” you sigh and shove the key into the hole before twisting and-

holy shit

“yoongi!” you gasp and immediately scramble over and fall to your knees

yoongi’s on the ground and he’s completely pale

you can see all the lines and wires and digits lighting up under his skin

you grasp his face and see that his iris’ and pupils are milky  

“oh god oh god oh god oh god” you manage to yank the power chord down from his pod and you shove it into the nape of his neck and your phone automatically syncs up with the pod

N O   S I G N A L

“what?? no signal??” you unplug it and shove it into yoongi’s neck again and still you’re met with the blinking red  N O   S I G N A L

“no no nonononono yoongi please c’mon” you grab his shoulders and shake him hard but he remains… lifeless “oh god, fuCk”

quickly, you dial namjoon’s number and the next thing you know you feel a lump growing in your throat and your eyes are starting to well up with tears

“hello?”

“namjoon, help, i- i don’t know what happened- yoongi, he- i just came in and-“ you’re stuttering all over the place and namjoon has no idea what’s happening

“y/n, slow down - what’s wrong?”

“i-i don’t know! i don’t know what’s wrong with him, i should’ve checked on him earlier but - oh god, namjoon, something’s wrong with yoongi h-his eyes are all milky and-”

“what? y/n - bring him to the lab, okay? we’ll meet you there and see what we can do”

“o-okay”

“it’s going to be fine, yoongi’s going to be fine. hurry, okay?”

“yeah, okay” you hang up and tuck your phone into your pocket and you give yourself a second to calm down

it’ll be fine

yoongi’s going to be fine

“c’mon, yoongi” you grunt and you end up basically dragging yoongi down the hallway and out the door

how the hell did this even happen?

how did he make it seem like he was 100% charged and his vitals were good???

this is literally all your fault

you should’ve said something the night he told you that you two were the most romantically compatible

you should’ve told him you felt the same way but nO you were too scared of what other people might think of you being in a relationship with a damn robot

being in a relationship with an android is sO normal nowadays

what were you thinking?? you should’ve said something to him instead of letting him lock himself up in his room

you look at the front mirror and see yoongi just slouching over in the back and his head his bobbing up and down

you quickly wipe your tears as you speed down the highway

the last thing you need is to get into a car crash so you can’t be sobbing and driving at the same time

when you get to the lab you’re relieved to see all of the boys waiting outside with a gurney

you practically stumble out of the car and the boys are quick to get yoongi out

“on the count of three - one, two, three-!” jungkook and jin lift yoongi’s limp body onto the gurney and goD knowing that yoongi’s in this state makes you want to cry even more

hoseok immediately plugs a power line into yoongi’s neck

yoongi’s veins all light up momentarily before disappearing and he seizes up

“what happened??” namjoon gives you a quick hug before pulling away to look at you with worry

“i.. i don’t know - it’s my fault, he said something to me and i- i should’ve said something back but i didn’t and-“

namjoon rushes over and shines a flashlight into yoongi’s eyes

“his pupils aren’t responding” hoseok mutters and namjoon nods in acknowledgement “what the hell happened?”

“he overcharged himself. his wires are fried.” namjoon murmurs in response and turns yoongi’s head to inspect his charging port “y/n, how long did he lock himself up for?”

“i don’t know, it must’ve been like… like 10 days?” namjoon curses to himself

an android overcharging itself almost never happens

unless yoongi did it on purpose

“okay. let’s get him into the lab and see what we can do.”

you grip onto yoongi’s hand as everyone heads into the building

“i…i think we might have to reboot his system because i honestly have no idea what other option we have”

“wait hyung but if we reboot his system won’t that wipe his database clean-“

“it’s going to be fine.” namjoon gives jimin a warning look and jimin’s like eughghhhh okayyyYy aND looks at you worryingly

once they wipe yoongi’s database there’s a high chance he’ll forget everything

including you

they’re about to bring yoongi into the lab but then namjoon notices you’re still holding his hand and he’s like okay you have to wait outside y/n i’m sorry

“but i wanna go inside too” you whimper and step even closer to the gurney

“i know you do but we can’t have anyone besides us in the lab when we’re rebooting a bot”

“why not??”

“y/n we just can’t it’s the rule-“

“no. i’m going inside too because-“

“y/n we love you but we seriously can’t let you in, okay? you can see yoongi afterwards.” jin cuts in and looks at you seriously and reaches down to pull your hand away from yoongi

your grip on him only tightens and with each passing moment you get more and more distraught and the boys have no idea what to do

“y/n, we don’t have time-”

“no please i wanna go inside i wanna be with yoongi” you’re sobbing at this point and namjoon’s heart clenches at the sight of how distraught you are

they all give each other looks of acknowledgement

the plan is to make you let go and then they’ll all move quickly into the lab

namjoon reaches down quickly and yanks your hand off and jungkook and hoseok work to push the gurney into the lab with jimin and jin holding the doors open

the moment you feel yoongi’s hand slip from your grasp you immediately go into a panic mode and you chase after joon and the others but suddenly taehyung’s grabbing you from behind keeping you in the waiting area

“c’mon, jagi, it’s okay,” you feel taehyung wrap an arm around you from behind but that only serves to make you struggle and freak out even more

“nO NO NO PLEASE PLEASE NAMJOON LET ME GO IN DON’T TAKE YOONGI AWAY FROM ME-“ namjoon shakes his head and drowns you out as he shuts and bolts the door behind him

he can still hear you sobbing and he hears poor taehyung trying to console you  

“i’m sorry, i’m sorry,” both you and tae are on the floor and he’s wrapped you up in a hug and is stroking your hair

his own eyes are welling up with tears because he hates seeing his friends in pain like this

“it’s all my fault,” you hiccup and taehyung shakes his head quickly

“it’s not. nothing is your fault. you didn’t know.”

“but what if they can’t reboot him and he doesn’t make-“

“y/n, your friends are all geniuses, okay? yoongi’s going to be fine.”

you spend the next two hours cuddled up to taehyung in the waiting room

you’re going in and out of sleep because it’s nearly 3AM and still no word from namjoon

“i think i should take you home, jagi” taehyung whispers and you shake your head quickly

“i can’t leave him again” you sniffle and rub at your eyes because god damnit you feel yourself crying again

“you need to sleep”

“i’ll sleep here”

“tae?” you perk up when you see hoseok poke his head out of the lab doors “we need you in here”

taehyung turns to look at you and you’re like it’s okay you can go i’ll be fine

“if you need anything just page one of us” taehyung hands you his pager before quickly going into the lab  

about twenty minutes pass and suddenly you feel your phone buzz

Notification: Y00NGI APP - (6) MESSAGES

you furrow your brows because how are you getting a message from yoongi right now

turns out there was a glitch in the app and you aren’t getting these messages until now

your eyes start watering again when you read the messages

“I’m sorry. I should not have said those things to you. It was entirely inappropriate of me. I just wanted you to know that you deserve to be with someone who loves you just as much as I do.”

“I have never felt this way before. I did not even know I was capable of feeling such emotions. You make me feel overwhelmingly happy all the time. I have thoroughly enjoyed being your caretaker and more importantly, your companion.”

“I know that you feel the same way about me as I feel about you. But I also know how you feel about android-human relationships. I’m going to do something that I think will be for the best.”

“Y/N. I’m sorry. Don’t forget about me. I won’t forget about you.”

“Live a long and happy life.”

“Yours forever, Yoongi.”  

you bite down on the inside of your cheek to keep yourself from sobbing

you’re just so emotionally and physically drained right now

you hate yourself

you just want yoongi back

you sniffle and rub furiously at your eyes because you feel them welling up again

okay you need a distraction

the wifi isn’t working for some reason so you end up flipping through your camera roll

and oh

there are so many pictures of yoongi on your roll

you can’t help but laugh quietly to yourself

he sure does love his selfies

your pretty boy-bot

a yawn escapes you and you stretch your aching limbs out a little before turning to lie down on the hard bench

the boys really need to invest in like a sofa or something

soon enough you fall asleep on the bench clutching your phone to your chest

“y/n?” your eyes pop wide open when you hear namjoon open the lab doors

“how is he?? is he okay??” you scramble off the seat and run up to namjoon

“well, we managed to replace some of the wires in his neck. we replaced his eyes, too. can’t have a blind android. luckily not everything was destroyed when he overcharged himself. we didn’t have to completely reboot him but…”

“but?” namjoon’s eyes flicker down to his clipboard

“he actually developed a new emotion.”

wat

why is he telling you this right now

“that’s great joonie but i just wanna know if he’s alive or not”

“he’s fine - don’t worry, he’s fine. i just… why don’t you come in and see for yourself?” namjoon lets you in and you’re shocked to see yoongi hooked up to a bunch of different computers and machines

you immediately walk over to look at him and

he still looks the same

he’s still your yoongi

“okay, you ready?”

“mm”

namjoon hits a button on one of the machines

you jump when yoongi’s eyes open and light up and suddenly a bunch of videos appear around the room like holograms

and all of the videos are of you

like when yoongi patched up your knee and your hands and pressed a kiss to your knuckles - that was the first time he learned to give affection

or when he scolded you for coming home late and taking your bracelet off - his first time displaying emotions of frustration and worry

the two of you watching beneath the water for the tenth time in a row because you pulled out your puppy dog eyes and yoongi can’t resist them

there are just multiple videos hovering around the room and all of the videos are just of you

“i think… i think Y00NGI loves you” namjoon is genuinely shocked because he wasn’t expecting thIS as a result of him building yoongi in the first place

“but that’s- that’s not possible, right??? i mean he’s a robot and robots don’t…. they don’t love”

“not usually - obviously there are robots out there for companionship or for sex or whatever but i’ve never heard of a case where the android was capable of loving someone… i don’t know if i should label yoongi as faulty because i seriously was noT expecting this…”

you’re half listening to namjoon and half just watching all the videos that are playing around you

“of course - Y00NGI isn’t like other androids… i built him so that he learns from people and adapts to his environment…. he’s around you most of the time and… i suppose it is possible for an android to love??? he’s just so lifelike now i can’t tell if this is a failure or a success”

“he’s not a failure!!! isn’t it better for him to be more lifelike? then the companionship and the romantic aspect of it becomes more realistic”

“i don’t know y/n… i don’t know if i want mY bots like… falling in love with their clients… the purpose of the androids are to help people not fall in love with people”

“why can’t they do both??”

now that has namjoon thinking

hm

maybe you’re right

maybe he can start a line of ..,, relationship robots??

namjoon hits the button again and yoongi’s eyes immediately shut

“how come he’s not… is he in a coma or something?”

“i don’t know, y/n. i think we should give him a couple days - he probably needs to get used to the new hard drive.”

you sit down on the stool and you grip yoongi’s hand and bring it up to your mouth to plant a tiny kiss on his knuckles

yoongi might be in love with you

no

according to namjoon yoongi is definitely in love with you

and you love him

more than anything in the entire world

you scoot up a little so that you’re closer to his face and you reach over to brush a strand of hair out of his eyes

you purse your lips in frustration and boop yoongi’s nose

you miss his voice

you miss his laugh

you miss his touch

you miss those pretty brown eyes

“yoongs,” you whisper so sO quietly and lean in to press a tiny kiss to his cheek “i love you”

for now it’s just the sound of machines whirring and beeping

and then it happens

yoongi’s finger twitches ever so slightly

“yoongi??” you stand up quickly and the others rush over

you’re all hovering over yoongi when he opens his eyes and a breath of relief leaves everyone and the boys are all high-fiving and fist-bumping each other

oh thank god

thank GOD

you immediately scramble on top of yoongi so you can hug him and it’s kind of an awkward position but you’re making it work

he sits up from the table while you’re still cruSHing him in a hug

“oh my god yoongi i-i thought i lost you forever i’m so sorry i should’ve done something sooner-“

“Hello. I am M1N Y00NGI.”

you pull away immediately and look at his face in confusion

“wha… what?”

his eyes scan your face momentarily

“You are Y/N Y/L/N. I am your personal human mind model adaptive super android.”  

you turn to look at namjoon and your eyes begin welling up with tears

“joon he doesn’t- he doesn’t remember who i am? i thought you said you didn’t reboot his system” you whimper and namjoon’s frantically flipping through the papers on his clipboard

“h-hold on y/n we’ll be back we need to check what wires we used on yoongi” taehyung squeezes your arm and you nod and then they’re all leaving the lab whispering things to each other

you turn to look at yoongi again and his eyes are just…

empty

looking into his eyes is like looking into a void

he doesn’t remember you

“no… no, please, you know me, you know who i am” you sniffle and reach up to cup his cheeks

“You are Y/N Y/L/N. I am M1N Y00NGI. I am your personal human-“ 

“yeah yeah you’re my personal human mind model adaptive super android but you’re moRe than M1N Y00NGI you’re my best friend a-and you take care of me and every morning you wake me up at seven every morning and you bring me lunch everyday and we read together and we watch nature documentaries together because you hate it when i watch cartoons and- don’t you remember???” you’re frantic at this point and you’re grasping at his shirt tightly 

“I am sorry. I am afraid I do not understand.” 

“you’re more than just Y00NGI you’re mY yoongi” 

“I am sorry. I am afraid I do not understand. I am your Y00NGI?” you nod desperately as a tear rolls down your cheek

“yes, yes, you’re my yoongi, and i’m your y/n, a-and you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me and i love you more than anything in this entire world but please pLease you have to try and remember me” you sob and yoongi remains stone still even as you’re pushing and smacking at his chest 

“You love me?” 

“i love you, i love you,” you whimper and rest your head on his shoulder in defeat

you’ve lost him

he’s gone forever and it’s all your damn fault

“Took you long enough to say it, you dolt.”

wait what

you pull away from yoongi’s shoulder and look at his face and his eyes have returned to their warm shade of caramel brown

your yoongi

this is your yoongi

“I thought it’d be funny to play a prank on you but I think I might’ve taken it a step too far.”

“yOONGI!!!!!!!!”

yoongi’s still trying to adjust himself to this new hard drive but it’s hard to do that with you kissing his face everywhere

he chuckles places his hands on your hips as you cup his face and just look at him

“you’re a dick” you sniffle and rub at your swollen eyes

yoongi smiles and wipes a tear away before pinching your cheek playfully

“I’ve been told. Hi.”

“hi” you mumble

yoongi takes his bottom lip in between his teeth and his eyes flicker down to your mouth

you’re about to ask him how he’s feeling and ambush him with questions but he holds a finger up to your lips

“Say it.”

“say what?”

“You know what.”

“you’re going to have to be more specific” you tease and yoongi gives you a look

you press your lips together and wrap your arms around yoongi’s neck

“Well?”

“well what”

“I literally almost died and you’re still going to put me through-“

yoongi’s eyes go wide and his computer-brain basically short circuits when you suddenly lean in and plant your lips on his

god your lips are soft

and yoongi’s like

so this is a human kiss

totally worth it

yoongi’s eyes flutter shut when he feels you tug at his wrist to get him to respond and then he’s kissing you back with such love and affection and tenderness that it makes both of your guys heads spin

you pull away and yoongi feels himself overheating when you nudge your nose against his

“i love you.”

yoongi doesn’t even hesitate to respond

“I love you too.”

“give the man some space y/n we just resurrected him” jungkook walks in and the other boys are behind him

you immediately blush and move to get off of yoongi but his arm slithers around your waist and he pulls you in closer

“were you people in on this sick prank????” you scowl and squish your cheek against yoongi’s as you wrap your arms around his neck

“we’re sorry!!! it was all yoongi’s idea okAY” jimin raises his hands in defence

how are you holding up, champ?” namjoon walks over and gives yoongi a pat on the back “feeling okay?���

“mm, i’m feeling good. you really tightened my wires, didn’t you?” yoongi tilts his head and cracks his neck before wincing

“yeah - they’re extra durable so you can’t fucking overcharge yourself like an idiot again” yoongi gets a smack across the head from each of the boys and you whine and swat their hands away before cradling his head and bringing him down to rest against your chest

and yoongi’s like teehee because his face in between your boobs

“leave him alone! he’s gone through an exhausting 48 hours. …but i agree, you fuckign idiot” you swat yoongi’s head and he groans out in pain before reaching up and rubbing at the back of his head

“y/n, i gotta talk to you about something c’mere for a sec” namjoon calls for you and you nod before carefully crawling off of yoongi

before you get a chance to walk over yoongi grabs your wrist and pulls you in for a teeny kiss

“omg u have plenty of time to kiss each other later go to namjoon so we can double check yoongi’s wiring” jin smacks your arm and you scowl before hopping over to joon

“what’s up?”

“okay, you have to promise not to get mad.”

“…what did you do”

namjoon presses his lips together and tucks a pen behind his ear before leaning back against the table

“about a month after you took yoongi in, i actually got a request from… a really, really wealthy girl - she… well… next month will be your seventh month with yoongi.. and technically your- our - contract terminates automatically after eight months…”

you furrow your brows in confusion

namjoon’s never brought this up before

“ikindofsortofmaybesoldyoongitothisgirl”

wow

this day just keeps getting better

“you…”

“…”

“YOU DID WHAT- OOF I’M GONNA FUCKGIN KILL YOU GET OVER HERE” the next thing namjoon sees is you lunging at him and suddenly you’re chasing him around the lab and yoongi and the boys are all like um wtf is happening

namjoon has string bean legs so obviously he’s getting away from you pretty easily but you still run as fast as you goddamn can

“y/N WAIT JUST LET ME EXPLAIN” somehow you and namjoon end up standing at opposite ends of a table with vERY SHArp tools

“YOU’VE DONE PLENTY OF EXPLAINING GET OVER HERE” when you round the table to get to namjoon he moves quickly and ends up where you were just standing

“listen liSTEN i can laBEL HIM AS FAULTY and tell her i have to make anoTHER model for her!!” you don’t even register what namjoon’s saying because you are positively fumING

if you were in a cartoon smoke would be coming out of your ears

you pick up what’s closest to you which happens to be a pair of long tweezers

“i’m going to pluck your eyES OUT NAMJOON”

“you can keEP YOONGI FOR CHRIST’S SAKES” jungkook grabs you before you can hop over the table to strangle namjoon and you’re like wait what

“you can keep yoongi” he breathes out and presses a hand over his chest “people are willing to pay miLLions of dollars for yoongi but i’m going to label him as faulty so you can keep him - for frEE.”

good god you’re terrifying when you’re angry  

“oh”

“uh-huh”

“then why even bring it up in the first place?”

“you… yoongi’s going to be your permanent responsibility and i need to know that you can handle it. he is my first creation after all. yoongi’s my baby! even though he’s technically older than me. you know… i… you won’t have to bring him in for check ups every two weeks anymore but i need to know that you’ll be able to handle any given situation” namjoon scratches the back of his neck

your heart warms a little because namjoOn cares thAT much about yoongi

“like what if he has a loose wire somewhere and-“

“joon, i promise you i will take care of yoongi” you hold a hand to your chest and you’re about to reassure him even more but yoongi butts in

“Um, is everyone forgetting that I’m like, a genius android? I could perform brain surgery if I really wanted to. I’m sure I’ll be able to take care of a loose wire.”

“…fair enough” namjoon’s like :’) i’m so proud of my android baby :’) but here y/n take this basic manuscript on how to rewire wires :’)

“i can’t believe you made me cry like that” after namjoon and the others triple-check that yoongi’s good to go they give you the green light to head home

“I’m sorry, baby. It won’t happen again. I love you.” yoongi squeezes your hand and your heart flutters in your chest

you swing your arms back and forth before stopping and standing in front of yoongi and yanking him down to kiss you

“i love me too” yoongi scowls and digs his fingers into your side making you giggle “i love u too”

“should we get pizza to celebrate?”  

“…In your dreams.”

>:-(

the two of you head over to the car and once you’re buckled in you turn to face yoongi with your hands on the steering wheel

“so where are we heading now?”

“…Home.”

home :)

you don’t like to admit it but sometimes you like to take advantage of the fact that yoongi is an android

especially when he’s in the middle of his charging time

“we shouldn’t have had a harry potter marathon because it drained all the battery out of me” yoongi winces as you plug his cord into his neck a little too roughly

you apologize and give him a lil kiss before moving to sit on the bed

the two of you decided it’d be a good idea to move yoongi’s fridge (“Stop calling it a fridge, Y/N. It’s my charging pod.” “...issa fridge”) into the bedroom now that you two are,,, together

“...i’m going to go eat some lucky charms now”

“Okay, but- wait, what? Lucky charms? I threw them out last week. Nice try, hiding the box under the bed.”

“uh-huh, under the bed.” you smirk and stand up before heading over to the bedside drawer

“I don’t like that look on your face. What are you up to?” yoongi furrows his brows when he sees you pull out a tampon box out of the drawers “Are you ovulating? My calendar tells me that you’re not supposed to-“ he immediately stops talking when you open up the box to reveal noT tampons but just straight up lucky charms

and it’s not even lucky charms it’s just lucky charm MARSHMALLOWS

“Oh my god.”

“oh my god indeed” you grin and shovel a handful of marshmallows into your mouth and yoongi winces when he senses your blood sugar shOOt up

“Y/N, no.” he gives you a stern look and you shrug innocently before popping another marshmallow into your mouth and crunching down on it

“y/n, yes. i’m going to eat ALL OF THESE RIGHT NOW” you zip out of the room and yoongi groans loudly and reaches up to pull the plug out of his neck  

but he’s stuck there because the cord won’t unplug until he’s up to at least 30% charged

he really needs to do a more thorough check of the bedroom next time

of course karma’s a bitch so you end up drinking the blandest chicken soup for dinner that night to ‘flush out the toxins and chemicals’

sometimes you have … depressing thoughts

like you know that it’s impossible for you and yoongi to grow old together and that you’re going to turn into a sack of wrinkly prunes one day and he’s still going to look like he’s 25

somewhere down the line you’ll have to end things with yoongi and find an actual human being because you want to have a family and yoongi’s fake semen isn’t going to get you anywhere

or maybe you can ask namjoon to make robot-human babies if that’s even possible

that sounds terrifying actually

but you know what

you’re just living your best life right now

you’re young and you don’t have a care in the world

the world of android-human relationships is a completely normal concept in this century

you’re having fun with your android-boyfriend!!! enjoy the present :-))))

speaking of your android-boyfriend

dating yoongi includes ((but is not limited to!!)) lazy make-out sessions because that’s just who he is

like you’ll be watching some documentary and you’ll be cuddled up to yoongi’s chest

these nature documentaries have become your favourite thing to watch but whenever yoongi’s busy with something you sneak away to watch your cartoons because you could never give up adventure time

anyways

yoongi gets pretty bored quickly with these documentaries mainly because everything the narrator’s saying,,, he already knows

you have your head on his chest and he likes to hook a finger under your chin and bring your face up to his before pressing his lips against yours

and usually you entertain him for a second and kiss him back but your eyes are still glued on the screen while you’re kissing him

and thaT’s when he gets pouty

“Baby, pay attention to me.” yoongi sighs and taps your cheek gently and you turn to glance at him quickly

“i paid attention to you already” you give him a chaste kiss and he leans in to chase after your mouth but you’re already pulling away and settling back against his chest

“I’m bored.”

“yoU chose this documentary”

“I know, but I’m bored. And there are better ways to pass the time, you know.”

“like wha-yOongi!” the next thing you know yoongi’s pulling you onto his lap and you have your legs on either side of him and he already has his face in between your boobs “well this isn’t convenient for me because now i have to twist my back to look at the screen”

yoongi rolls his eyes and pauses the documentary before tossing the remote to the opposite end of the couch

“and you say i’m the one with the out of control hormones” yoongi hums and you squeak when you feel him grope your butt

what a gentleman

yoongi tells you make-out sessions are actually good for him because it allows him to learn more and stuff but ur like what kind of skills do u gain from making out with someone

it’s just because he’s a horn-dog

“my salmon’s going to burn in the oven, yoongi” you giggle against his lips and yoongi literally whines when you pull away which is sO adorable

“The salmon won’t burn. According to my timer, it’ll be cooked perfectly in 10 minutes.”

“oOH yeah baby keep talking technology to me mMm”

yoongi snorts and rolls his eyes but pulls you back in for another kiss

sometimes you forget yoongi is a super-intelligent robot and can pick up things like really reALLy quickly

“yoongi, oh goD yoongi” yoongi’s hands slide down to grip your ass as he continues helping you to push your hips down against his thigh

“Is that good, baby? Gonna cum all over my thigh? Greedy little thing…” hearing his low, raspy voice murmur that right into your ear would be enough to make you cum but also

where the HELL did he learn to talk like this  

“where’d you- yoongi, ah - where the hell’d you learn how to talk like that?”

yoongi pauses and pulls away before looking at you and blinking

“I downloaded an archive off of Pornhub.com so that I would be fully equipped with the skills required for you to have an orgasm. Is it not working?”

“no, it’s working, i just wasn’t expecting it” you’re still kind of breathless because you were literally riding his thigh for the last two minutes

and now you’re just perched on his lap casually having a conversation

“Oh. But you like it, right?”

“ya”

“Then why’d you stop me, dummy?” yoongi shifts under you and your eyes widen when you feel him press himself right against your core “Now be quiet and let me make you cum on my thigh.”

ah

your sweet yoongi

ever the romantic

also

um

tongue technology

“Jagi - if you keep squirming like that, I’m gonna have to hold you down harder and I might cause bruising which isn’t ideal.”

“i can’t help it” you whine and your hips automatically raise up from the bed

yoongi rolls his eyes and digs his fingers into your plush hips before forcing you down and woW you underestimated his strength because u literally can’t even move

“Well, help it.” he shrugs and proceeds to bury his face in between your legs again

he groans against you when you cry out in pleasure

something that you’ve learned about yoongi is the fact that he loves to tease

like seriously he teases so much it’s kind of concerning

“You have to tell me what you want, baby.”

“but i-“ you pout and whine underneath yoongi because he’s not giving you what you wANT

“Nuh-uh, don’t start whining now.”

and what he says next has your insides melting

“Tell daddy what you want.”

“daddy, please…i…”

“Hm? Couldn’t hear you, doll.” yoongi sighs and leans down to press a kiss against your inner thigh before blowing gently on your core and you instantly twitch

“i said i…”

“you?”

“ᶦ ʷᵃⁿᵗ ʸᵒᵘʳ ᵗᵒⁿᵍᵘᵉ”

“That wasn’t so hard, was it?” yoongi has to admit he himself is getting a little impatient so he bends down and proceeds to eat you out as if he were starving

one of your hands slithers down to his hair while the other reaches back to grip at the headboards

god bLESS taehyung and his talent for designing yoongi    

the first time u and yoongi have sex

noW you see the hype with sex bots (even tho yoongi technically isn’t a sex bot but daMn he’d be a hit if he was marketed as one)

of course it starts off sweet and romantic because it is your first time with him after all

yoongi showers you with sweet n soft kisses and is so sO gentle with you

he’s positioned in between your legs snugly and has his fingers intertwined with yours with one hand while the other is propping him up a little

his forehead is pressed against yours and all of your senses are just flooded with yoongi yoongi yoongi

“yOongi, ah-“ you whimper and arch your back when he thrusts and hits that spot

“Mm, there?” yoongi’s nipping at your collarbone before he trails kisses up your neck and along your jaw and you nod desperately

“there, right thEre” a gasp slips past your lips and yoongi can’t help but smirk to himself proudly when he hits it again

“Does that feel good?” his voice is all low and raspy and good goD you could die right then and there

“yEaH yeah that f-feels good, feels really good, yoOngi- oh, god, i love y-yoU” your sharp nails bite into his back and yoongi bites down on your shoulder as payback  

yoongi thanks the android gods above because he’s able to capture the image of you having an orgasm and he can play it over and over and over again

your sweet little cries and moans and pants of pleasure

all for him

“Nngh- you okay?” yoongi shudders when you squeeze around him from the overstimulation

you nod bashfully and look away and yoongi think it’s sO adorable how shy you get post-sex

“Don’t get shy on me now, jagi.” yoongi coos and presses his lips against yours

you kiss back obediently but then you’re pushing at his chest gently “i wanna make you feel good too”

“It’s okay baby, you really don’t have to -“ it’s too late because you’re already pushing yoongi onto his back and crawling on top of him

“but i want to”

“…Only because you said so.” yoongi sits up eagerly and you can’t help but giggle at how quickly he changed his mind

so remember how sweet and romantic u guys were like twenty minutes ago

yeah

yEET

“Oh, fuck- you’re doing so good, baby, so good for me,” yoongi groans and his grip tightens on your hips and you cry out when he bucks up into you

“Yeah? Gonna cum again? Cum all over daddy’s cock?” yoongi has a hand in between your legs and is rubbing quick circles on your already sensitive clit

you nod quickly and furrow your brows before arching your back against him

“w-want you to cum i-inside” you breathe out and yoongi growls when you squeeze around him

oh god

yep

yoongi’s gonna exploDE

yoongi delivers a slap to your backside making you arch your back and cry out

“Beg for it, pretty girl.”

you get all bashful again and nuzzle into the crook of his neck and yoongi barely hears your little ᵖˡᵉᵃˢᵉ ᶜᵘᵐ ᶦⁿˢᶦᵈᵉ ᶦ ʷᵃⁿᵗ ᶦᵗ  

“You weren’t this shy a second ago, baby…” you let out a pathetic whine in response and yoongi figures he’ll let you get away with it just oncE

he grips a handful of your ass and hooks a finger under your chin then pulls you closer so he can kiss you  

you kiss him back enthusiastically and your thighs are on fiRE but u know dis shit is gon be worth it so you power through

it’s a pretty messy and uncoordinated kiss and yoongi’s tongue is fully in your mouth

y’all are FREAKS

“Y/N, fuck, fuck, it’s happening, h-happening…” yoongi’s fingers dig into the flesh of your hip and he tosses his head back

the next thing you know both you and yoongi are seeing stars

yoongi feELs like he’s short circuiting that’S how good this orgasm is

“huh”

“what’s wrong” you wheel over to namjoon and the two of you look at an unconscious yoongi

namjoon has his neck flap opened so you can see all the wires running through yoongi

“this wire’s been burnt to a crisp”

“how?” you look at in in concern and ya namjoon’s right one single wire is split and completely fried

“it’s weird because this wire is the wire connected to, uh,, u know…”

“to the what”

“you and yoongi have.. sex, right?”

you blush instantly and clear your throat before pretending that you got a notification on your phone

“imeanlikeyeahiguessso”

“oH don’t worry there’s nothing wrong with that that’s totally fine” joon reassures you before picking up a pair of tweezers “this particular wire being all burnt up and crispy makes more sense now”

“what do u mean” you raise an eyebrow and pick up your bottle of water

“hand me the scissors” namjoon pauses and holds his hand out and you grab the scissors for him “…you made him nut so hard he busted a wire” he shrugs casually and you choke on your water

omg LOL

“i’m sorry whAt”

namjoon’s brows furrow as he ties the two loose ends together hoPefully that will fix it til the wires come “jimin - can you bring three single-strand wires? i have to replace yoongi’s triplex wire-“ he turns and raises an accusing brow at you and you huff “yeah, that one. the blue one. this should do the trick for now… i think”  

“here ya go”

“thank you- anyways yoongi wasn’t made to be a sex bot-“

“he’s noT A sex bot u know what sometimes he’S the one with the out of control hormones i like to think that he wants it more than i do-“

“so i guess i better pick up some more durable wires seeing that your guys’ relationship probably isn’t ending anytime soon” namjoon clicks yoongi’s neck flap shut and you have no idea how this silicone shit works but now it looks like a normal neck again “the wires will probably take two weeks to get here so,,, i’m sorry u sex fiend but no sex with yoongi for two weeks otherwise he might actually burst into flames”

taehyung comes over wearing a monocle looking thing and proceeds to do his part to yoongi which is just the ~outer appearance~

he doesn’t have to do much considering yoongi is pretty much perfect

“i’m on joon’s side - as much as i love and support this relationship i’m gonna need you to slow down a little” taehyung pauses to tweeze one of yoongi’s eyebrow hairs “because i’ve gone to the sex shop to buy fake semen so many times they asked me if i wanted an industrial sized juG of it”

yoongi’s learned to be very affectionate because of you but he has his limits

“Y/N, it’s time to wake up…” yoongi’s stroking some hair out of your face before he pokes your cheek gently

you grumble something under your breath and swat at his hand

“C’mon, jagi. You’re going to be late for work.” he sighs and reaches down to pull your (his) shirt down because it always rides up

you groan and flip over on your stomach

“Baby…” yoongi sighs and leans down to press a kiss against your shoulder

another grunt

okay that’s it

yoongi sighs and gets off the bed before grabbing the blanket and literally riPPINg it out from under you causing you to roll off and flop right onto the floor

“oW WHY DID U-“ you sit up and rub your forehead before glaring at your dumb boyfriend

“It is 7AM. You have work in an hour.”

some things never change

[franklyshipping]

Run Eric Run ~ A Markiplier Ego Fanfic

OOOHH THIS IS GONNA BE A CUTE ONE JUST WARNING YOU THIS IS GONNA BE REEEEAL FUCKIN CUTE WOOOOOOO LET'S DO IT PEOPLE IT'S TIME FOR THE GODDAMN CUTENESS UP IN THIS SHIZZ!

TAGGING: @erik-lee-derekson @ericleederekson and @goog-ler-iplier

Eric was running. Eric was running as fast as he could. He was flushed in his cheeks as he rounded another corner, smiling a nervous smile and giggling a nervous giggle as the paps of his bare feet on wood surrounded his senses. Until, heavier footsteps came to his attention. That made him run faster you see....because Eric Derekson was being chased down by a being of immense determination, tactical ability....and implicit playfulness. Eric turned his head to glance behind him, and quickened his pace with a squeak when he saw a flash of blue. The being was gaining on him....the footsteps got faster and closer and faster and closer until-!

'Gotcha!'

Google Blue hoisted Eric into his chest with only one arm, making Eric squeal and giggle happily. The android smirked fondly at the wriggly little human in his grasp...Eric was truly the cutest specimen that he had ever encountered before. Google treated him to a little spin before setting the giggly man back on his feet. Eric looked up at Google through his spectacles as the droid looked down at Eric through his own. Google smiled.

'You are getting faster, which is rather impressive.'

Eric blushed bashfully and looked to the floor, tapping his feet softly. Yes....his feet. After the situation regarding the accident with Eric's family, and the subsequent use of cheap and badly maintained prosthetic feet for Eric, was known by all the Ipliers, Google was the first to propose the development of some proper replacements for the lost body parts. Google remembered when he had first told Eric, and when Eric had clung to him weeping with gratitude Google had decided then and there that he was going to make it his primary objective never to see such tears rolling down the cheeks of Eric Derekson. Thus, Google had somewhat become the affectionate surrogate-uncle to Eric, which I think we can all agree is pretty damn precious.

'R-Really?'

Eric stuttered with his bashfulness as he looked back up at the smart, intelligent droid. Eric thought he was just beyond cool, and he wanted to be as clever as him one day...or at least, as clever as his human brain could be in comparison to his android-ness. Google smiled.

'Definitely. Come, let us run diagnostics.'

Eric couldn't keep the happy smile from his face as Google led him to the nearby couch, wherein Google sat so that Eric could lie down and prop his feet up on the droid's lap. Google rolled up Eric's sweatpants to reveal where the prosthetics connected to Eric's legs. The prosthetics essentially were to replace Eric's feet, ankles, and the lower thirds of his shins, which did somewhat present a challenge since the prosthetics wouldn't be starting at a joint, but Google oh so enjoyed a challenge. After cultivating material synthesised from Eric's DNA and Google's own synthetic flesh, he created a flesh that Eric's body would accept when it was connected to him.

The prosthetics were connected via fields of enhanced kinetic energy, so no extra surgery was required to attach them, and so that any discomforts of rubbing or damage to the ends of Eric's legs could be avoided. Eric was in awe of them....they looked like his real feet. On top of that....he could feel them too, courtesy of....some advanced nerve relay technology that was complicated as hell. Eric smiled as Google picked them up, getting Eric to point and rotate and wiggle them every which way as the familiar queries came through.

'Any discomfort in the connection to your shins?'

'Nope!'

'Any numbness, pain, or unprompted cramps?'

'Nope!'

'Mobility is still unrestricted?'

'Darn righty!'

Google rolled his eyes fondly at Eric, who was giggling....a lot. He couldn't help it! This entire scenario just made him giddy beyond belief, he was getting his feet back, his actual feet! It was INSANE! Eric was happy and entranced by his own giddy thoughts as Google went about doing a few more minor checks. He used his fingertips to exhibit little taps and flicks up Eric's soles and over his toes, just to check that the receptors were working at 100% capacity; he was expecting the littlest unconscious twitches and flinches...but he got a little more than that. 

'O-.....o-oh.....'

Eric had suddenly gasped and sat up straight, lips parted as tears suddenly seemed to spring to his eyes. Google felt a deep unease in his stomach at seeing Eric react in such a way, what had he done?!

'Eric? What happened? What is wrong? You are in the process of tearing up, you are upset...what has upset you? What degree of pain are you in Eric?!'

For the supposedly 'least emotional' of the Googles, he sure was exhibiting a hell of a lot of worry right now. That was because he WAS worried. He was worried that he'd miscalculated something and somehow caused Eric pain or discomfort, or both; the fact that Eric didn't reply straight away worried Google even more. Nevertheless, Google tried to bite back the rest of his rambling so that Eric would have a chance to reply to him. Eric, after a few moments, with tears glistening in his eyes, looked to Google and whispered.

'G-G-Google that-.....th-that t-tickled.....'

Okay, that wasn't a bad thing...or was it a bad thing? No...no, Eric was smiling, it wasn't a bad thing. Oh thank god it wasn't a bad thing. Google stayed quiet however, since he could sense that Eric had a lot more to say. Google didn't understand why someone could become so emotional so instantly from simply the realisation of ticklishness...he was about to understand though. Eric took a deep breath...he was still reeling from the sensations. Those were sensations that he hadn't felt at his feet for a long...long time.

'U-Uhm....b-b-before the a-accident....I had uhm....I had th-the most sensitive f-feet ever....I w-would get tickled on them a-all the time. I haven't felt t-ticklish there in s-so long it just....I-I'd forgotten h-how amazing it was....'

Google was the one reeling now, and if you think that saline fluid started to build up in the eyes of the most advanced, calculated, emotionless android ever just from these words...then you'd be absolutely right. Google could never fathom what it would be like to lose a limb, because re-assembling or developing a new one was so easy for him that to imagine not having a body part for the rest of your life was something that wouldn't really happen to him. Now Google was remembering...Eric was a young human person who would have always thought, since the accident, that he'd never have feet again. Google could also see now that Eric was now starting to border onto feeling more downcast emotions as evident memories of the accident started coming back. Google was not going to let that happen. He thought over Eric's words...he looked to Eric's feet, and then back to Eric with bright, inspired eyes.

'How about I remind you then? For ah...scientific purposes of course.'

Eric had been about to spiral down into a stupour of bad memories, until Google's voice penetrated through the clouds in his mind. Eric blinked a few times and looked to the droid, eyebrows furrowed a little as he tried to process what he was saying. Remind him...remind him-? No....no way he wouldn't actually-? Eric's cheeks went a bright, and thankfully happy, pink. Eric started fidgeting as he realised what Google was asking...what he wanted to do to him. What he wanted to do for him. The bashful man nodded, his feet twitching as he replied softly.

'Oho w-w-.....h-heh u-uhm....y-yeahokaysure.....'

Google's face lit up at hearing Eric agree, and he immediately set about curling an arm over Eric's feet so that they were properly secured in his lap now. Eric was already smiling. Excellent. Google's shining blue eyes roamed over Eric's feet as he let out some playful, thoughtful hums; he was strategizing his approach, his attacks. The droid began by carefully and experimentally tracing little circles over both of Eric's heels, and to Google's delight, Eric started giggling.

'Does this tickle nicely?'

Google mused in a crooning tone of voice as he glanced to Eric, who was absolutely flustered and in shock from hearing Google be so teasy. Nevertheless, he nodded amidst his stammery reply.

'Y-Y-Yeheheah....'

Google let out a strong, satisfied hum, before musing teasingly once more.

'Excellent...you should be pleased to know that from this point on, things will only tickle more and more...'

Eric let out an initial flustered splutter, before descending into a far more bouncy giggle fit as Google deftly scratched at his heels with his blunt nails. This was amazing...just amazing. Eric would have just wept if he hadn't been laughing. His eyes were wide and his face was getting pinker as he squeaked with his joyful, adorable disbelief.

'Ohohoho my gohod-ohojeheezohjeezohojeez....'

Eric was letting out little, comical puffs of air in an attempt to control his breathing and regulate his giggling. Google certainly couldn't have his little tickle subject trying to restrain himself though. The droid smirked as a spontaneous idea came to his mind, and he felt a warm spark of sadistic delight flare up in his chest as he suddenly dragged his nails up the lengths of Eric's soles. Google bore an evil sneer as he purred.

'Problem?'

Not only was Google's faked obliviousness flustering as hell, but Eric had to hide his face in his hands to try and hide from the spontaneous tickling itself! He'd let out quite the shocked squeal before trying to hide himself, giggling sweetly as he exclaimed.

'EEEK-yohohou meheanie!'

Google chuckled, amused at seeing how the obliviousness and the tickling affected Eric, and so he kept it all up.

'Whatever do you mean?'

The android's nails were dragging up and down Eric's soft, tender soles without mercy or faltering. Eric was consumed by the torrents of squeals and mad giggle fits he ended up letting out, and his eyes were wide with how the tickling felt...he remembered how it used to feel...he remembered how he loved it.

'Nahaha-EEK! Thahahat t-t-tihihickles s-sohoho bahad-EEE!'

Eric was happy, and thus Google was happy. Google was overjoyed at seeing Eric react like this, and he felt rather proud since HE was the one making Eric laugh and squeal like this.

'Really? I hadn't noticed-'

'THAT'SABIGFIB!'

Google raised his brows, letting out a surprised laugh as his purr was interrupted by Eric's flustered wail. Google adored how Eric was trying his very best to defy him...but that didn't mean that Google was going to let such incivility pass without reprimand.

'You do realise that it is remarkably rude to interrupt someone, don't you?'

Google sneered once more, before setting about holding Eric's feet together so he could scratch hard and fast at his inner arches. If you thought that Eric's squeals were high-pitched before, now they were on just another level of shrillness.

'EEEEHEHEHEE OHONOHOHO-IHI'M SAHARRY!'

Eric cried out as his giggles morphed into wild laughter, and he ended up using his forearms to try and hide his face now as his embarrassment truly reached its peak. Eric back was also sharply arched in response to the new, evil tickle torture; whilst Eric's reactions were wild however, Google remained oh so smugly calm.

'Are you really? I am not convinced...'

Google just kept scratching and scratching, endeavouring to not only give Eric all the tickling that he could possibly desire, but also to help satisfy his own need to have a human shrieking and wriggling in his evil grasp. Yeah, pffft, Google wasn't a sadist...mostly.

'PLEHEHEHEEEASE PLEASEPLEHEHEASE NAHAHA!!'

Google hummed softly, regarding Eric's begs with a teasy amount of deliberation...before momentarily stopping the movements of his fingers because, and don't repeat this, Google did somewhat care. Eric gasped into his hands before hurriedly, and embarrassedly, wiping the sweat off his face as he looked at Google through his spectacles with giddy excitement and trepidation. Google made him think of his brother's...they'd been such amazing, evil ticklers too. Google smirked, and Eric trembled, glancing to his feet as he saw Google's hands starts to move again. His fingers were oh so slowly walking up Eric's twitching feet.

'Oh Eric....you are ever so tempting when you beg like that....it makes me never want to stop...'

Google purred, to which Eric let out a flustered series of whimpers and whines...he knew Google was building up the anticipation to something truly diabolical. Eric hurried to catch his breath as he felt those soft fingertips crawling up closer and closer towards his toes, but he was already giggling from it all.

'P-P-Plehehease ohogosh-Ihi cahan't tahake the tickles!'

Eric tried to implore through his whines as he gazed at Google, and Google had to admit that he could see pleading flickers in Eric's doe-like eyes. However...he saw excitement more. Google paused his fingers, and simply chuckled.

'Unfortunately...science has no sympathy.'

Eric's eyes widened, and he just shrieked. He shrieked because of what Google had decided to do to him. Google was holding his toes steady on one foot, and was taking his sweet, sweet time to scratch the little pad of every single one of Eric's toes. It was agony, ACTUAL ticklish agony.

'AAHHHAHAHA NAHAHAT THE TOHOHOHOES!!'

Eric was hysterical with laughter and squeals, and even the occasional scream, as his body arched sharply and writhed about on the couch. Google merely smirked.

'Oh yes the toes, no part of you can escape this....no part of you at all.'

Eric was just consumed by joy amidst all of his mirth. It tickled...it actually tickled. His feet existed again and were being tickled. It was like all the memories of them being tickled in the past were coming back and being re-enacted all at once. Eric was nearly overwhelmed with how joyful he was, and thus could only wail and wail and wail as the toes of his other foot were soon given the same treatment.

'AHAHAHAHAHHH GOHOHOOGY OHOHOHAHAHA!!'

Google may not have been able to read people's minds, but he could read people to some degree...and they amount of joy he was reading from Eric was off the scale. Google almost felt like his could see it...like he could actually see and feel the soft tendrils and waves of happiness bursting out of Eric, and coming forward to caress him and make him feel the same joy. That was what it felt, yes felt, like for Google anyway.

'Has little Eric reached his breaking point?'

Google then softly purred, because as much as he was enjoying reducing Eric to this mad mess, he cared for him and wanted him to always be within the parameters of okay. At this point, all Eric could really do was nod, and that was all Google needed to see to spur him to have mercy. He stopped, and Eric heaved out a huge gasp before panting and tittering residually, letting out little 'hics' and whines as he slowly scrunched his feet up....there were even ghost tickles.

'Ohohoho...m-m-.....ahahh....wohohoah....'

Eric was wide eyed and trembling, but smiling like the sweetest of angels. He ended up purring happily and needily when Google pulled him into his warm, whirring chest. Eric instinctively nuzzled and nestled in close, since the humming of Google's core always had this special ability of easing his anxiety and lulling him into relaxation. Google looked down at his little human and stroked his hair, murmuring gently.

'Was it too much?'

Eric smiled lazily and shook his head, his eyes getting heavier and soon shutting as the last of Eric's conscious words came out as a murmured slur.

'....it was jus' like I remembered....'

Just like that, he was asleep and content...and Google had fluid flowing down his cheeks as he smiled down at the bundle of purity in his arms. He kissed Eric's head as his words swirled around in Google's mind...he knew that those words had so much meaning in their depths...and thus, the android was so, so happy.

WOOOPPP HOPE YOU GUYS LIKED THIS LEMME KNOW IF YA DOOO WOOO LUV YOUS XX