hobbitinthetardis

[he-calls-me-kitten]

Dirty Dozen (ft. +2)

GN! MC x Pervert! OM Characters

(Cause y'all seemed to love the first one omg. Also TW: I made everyone wayy more sleazy and nasty than before so read at your own risk. MInors DNI)

Pervert! Mammon who likes to ask you for something specifically when your hands are full. "MC, lend me a few Grimm could ya?" He asks when you're in the middle of cooking.

"My hands are covered in cake batter, just take some from my back pocket."

"Are you sure it's there? Let me check both pockets." He isn't so much searching for coins as much as he's feeling and practically groping your ass. Seriously you start to wonder how it's taking him 20 minutes to find something that's right there.

Pervert! Solomon who keeps his room colder than usual when you come over for magic lessons.

"Is it too cold for you MC? I apologise, I kept it this way because some of the potions have bad reactions to heat but if you'd like-"

"I'm absolutely fine, Solomon. You worry about me too much." You smile at him reassuringly, not noticing how his eyes are so eagerly trained at your nipples perking up through your thin t-shirt.

Boner Bonus points if you allow him to hug you for some warmth. His fingers will definitely brush against your chest more than once.

Pervert! Beel who seems to make a mess whenever he's trying to help you in the kitchen. "I'm so sorry, MC. I didn't mean to spill it on your hands!"

"It's okay Beel, it's just some cream and syrup. I can just wash it off right away."

"But it's such a waste. Please allow me." He starts to thoroughly lick your fingers and you shake your head and let him knowing his fixations on food.

But he can't help it - you taste so good. He secretly wonders what you might taste like down there, drooling at the thought.

Pervert! Levi who has taken to sitting on pillows Japanese style while gaming and offers you the same. Sure enough you don't even suspect an ulterior motive.

"Did you get inspired by some human world anime again? Careful though - your legs and butt will start to cramp after a while."

"MC you're too gracious! Caring so much for an otaku like me!"

After you leave, he promptly takes the pillow you were sitting on and puts it in his bathtub. He's going to sleep on it ofc. Your scent on it helps him jerk off better.

Pervert! Belphie who now asks you to rub his belly till he falls asleep. "What's so funny?" He asks as you giggle at his request.

"Since when do you need help falling asleep?"

"I care about the quality of my sleep. And I sleep better this way."

Fortunately you believe him and don't suspect that it's because it's the closest he can get you to fondling his dick. He has such a difficult time holding in his moans and hard ons, every time your hands go even a bit lower than usual.

Pervert! Barbatos who got into sewing clothes as a hobby and specifically likes making them for you now. But you never understand why he needs to take same measurements over and over again.

"Oh? This is a different kind of design, MC. So the measurements will vary from before."

"Always making new things aren't you? You never fail to suprise Barbatos." You smile at him admiring.

The tightening of the tape around your chest and crotch are subtle. He can hardly keep it together when you praise him after all. But he has to if he wants to skim his hands over your body like this again.

Pervert! Diavolo who takes you on such long drives that you always doze off in the front seat, waking up apologetic for missing so much of the journey.

"Hahaha, it's okay, MC. We've been on this same road lots of times. I assure you, you didn't miss anything. And I like that you feel safe to sleep in my presence."

"But still, I'm so sorry, it feels disrespectful..." You apologize, not even knowing how hard he is in his pants right now.

Afterall, he can keep squeezing your beautiful thighs, maybe let his hands wander between them and imagine himself fucking you in the back seat as much as he wants, when you're asleep.

Pervert! Simeon who will have noone except you as his muse for art classes. And the themes just keep getting more erotic each time.

"Are you sure you're okay with this, MC? You don't have to do it if you're not comfortable-"

"Nonsense, Simeon. I feel super comfortable if it's you. You're a true artist after all." You say as you lay on his bed wrapped up only in bedsheets, exposing your entire back and legs.

If only you knew, this angel has thoughts dirtier than most demons. How he's practically fucking you with his eyes. How he's definitely going to jerk off into those bedsheets, moaning your name.

Pervert! Satan who loves teaching you things - standing right behind you, guiding your hands to make latte-art, or trying a new style of painting.

"That's it, nice and slow. Look how much you've improved, MC." He beams at the cute kitty in the coffee cup.

"All thanks to you, Satan. I can't wait to learn more from you." You smile at him earnestly.

He almost feels guilty for tricking you this way, but the way your hands feel in his, and your ass feels against his groin is so addicting. One of these days, he wishes could teach you to be on all fours and take his length in your pretty little mouth.

Pervert! Asmo who loves keeping your eyes on him and noone else. From elaborate performances to petty staring contests, he cannot have enough of your gaze.

"Oh you're turning red in the face, Asmo. Did I manage to flutter the heart of the Avatar of Lust?" You lean forward smiling.

"You're my only weakness after all, MC. It's your fault for making me this way." He almost moans.

You laugh and mock apologize at his antics but you don't know he's been grinding like an animal on his seat, and creamed his pants under your innocent gaze. Your undivided attention just turns him on so much.

Pervert! Lucifer who makes his desires too obvious sometimes. He'll regret it in the morning and take you to dinner to apologize but not until he's already done something dirty.

"Lucifer, it's 2 am. You need to throw away that coffee and sleep." You're practically dragging him to bed.

"Fine. I'll go sleep if you'll stay in my room tonight." He says knowing you'll comply. You care too much for your own good. He's not even going to let you sleep on the couch, no you have to stay wrapped up in his arms.

You might wake upto him groaning your name in his sleep and you might mistake it for a nightmare - not knowing how he's balls deep inside you in his dreams.

Pervert! Thirteen who likes how excited you get over her newest inventions and keeps making more things to call you over.

"And this little baby and can throw pie at people's faces without ever missing. Guaranteed headshot." She smiles proud.

"This would be so useful in a cafeteria food fight and then get banned right after its glory. But I so wanna use it!" You whine.

She loves how much you appreciate her inventions. She is secretly working on a 'pleasure' device scented like her to give you - she hopes you'll like it just as much.

Pervert! Mephisto who is actually taken aback by your duality. You're such a mischievous little imp usually but turn so well-mannered in front of Diavolo's esteemed guests.

"So even you can be prim and proper sometimes? If only you could maintain this on the daily." He huffs.

You laugh and mock-bow in front of him. "Of course, anything for you my dearest lord. Would you like to dance with this proper human while you can?"

He blushes at the sudden offer. Why you little- how dare you tempt him like this. You can't complain about him gripping you somewhere improper or too tight. You deserve this for your attitude.

Pervert! Raphael who is still navigating new feelings of lust he's never felt before he met you. Why his heart skips every time you fall asleep on his shoulder or why he felt a sudden warmth at the pit of his stomach feeling you breath so softly into his neck.

"Thank you for helping me tidy the classroom, MC. I didn't even know where the cleaning supplies were."

"That's alright. It's more fun with two people anyway and wait Raphael there's a bucket over the-" The fresh bucket of water already spilled splashing all over both of you.

You immediately fetched a towel to help him dry up but he couldn't stop staring at you instead. With the uniform sticking to your body like and the water glistening on your exposed skin - why was he so enthralled? Why does he feel a strange pulsing between his legs as you hover over him?

[heartfullofleeches]

[Angst]

Childhood Best Friends with a small age gap- two or three years, nothing crazy- but it means everything as they age.

It was hard for them to make friends their age when you first met. They liked things that were too "childish" for their peers - things another child who lived not to far away adored. They'd seen each other on the way to school, but they didn't interact frequently due to their difference in grade.

Until that day-

"Whoa...Cool backpack. You like that show too?"

"Thanks... I'm thinking of getting a new one though... Do you want me to ask my parents if you can have it?"

"What?! It looks fine to me... Why are you getting rid of it?"

"My friends called me a baby... I won't be able to go back to class without everyone laughing at me unless I get a better one."

"That's silly!.... It's on right now... Wanna watch it with me?"

The two were inseparable from then on- School hindered the time they had to see each other each morning, but as soon as it let out - both ran to meet with their new best friend. The elder of the pair was often mocked and teased for their choice, but they could hardly care anymore. They had someone who'd stick by their side to the very end - childish fixations and all.

Years went on and they made new friends. It happens. More obstacles began piling up throughout - chipping away at the few hours they scarcely had to begin with. Studying, Hobbies, balancing days between hanging out with other friend groups and the person who once meant the world. They tried to make things works, but nothing went to plan-

"Is it alright if Y/n comes with us tonight?"

"Y/N? Aren't they're too young to see this movie? We shouldn't be responsible if they have night terrors or something.."

"They aren't that young... Are they?"

They never thought about it before. You were so close in age as kids it never hit them that as you grew that little gap drew a bridge between you - and it was easier to let you go than finding an alternative.

"Hey, Dude! Are we still on for this weekend? I can't believe they're making a reboot after all this time!.."

"Are my messages going through? You haven't responded in a while... I saw you outside school yesterday and yelled your name, but....."

"Did I do something wrong?"

"Hey."

"You're hanging out with them today? Did you forget about my birthday?...."

"You removed me off your list of friends...We're still friends, right?"

"Let me alone. I'm sick of being your babysitter. Go find friends your own age and stay away from mine."

And that was the end of things.

College cames around and their live became relatively tame. Their thoughts drifted to that childhood friend of theirs every now and again, but between school and partying with the new friends they had made - those memories faded to the back of their mind.

An acquaintance asks them to help show some new faces around the campus. One sticks out to them amongst the crowd. It's you. What do they say to you after all these years? You don't look sad to see them. Nor angry. Intact - you look..

Relieved.

Pulling them aside at the end of the tour, you free yourself from the burden that's weighted down on you since they left you.

"I'm sorry."

"It was never my intention to hold you back. Overtime I realized I was just that annoying kid who clung onto you because I thought you were my first and only friend...When you never felt that way about me. I'm sorry for taking that away from you. If our paths cross again, I promise I won't even look at you."

After being abandoned by your best friend- the person you looked up to most, you matured well beyond your years in hopes that would make you like them again. Overtime, you gave up that goal, but others could see how you've changed.

"Isn't that.... Y/n?.."

"Oh, man- It is! You guys were glued at the hip before we became teens."

"They're..kinda cute... Do you still have their number?"

All this time apart, a feeling long forgotten resurged inside them. The need to protect you. You didn't know these people like they did. You shouldn't be going to parties with them, getting to know and befriend them. They'll only hurt you - worse than they had. They never should have said goodbye to you- They should have allowed the feelings they were so scared to have, but had always been there develop and blossom naturally until you both were adults ready to move on to that stage in your friendship.

They know you best. No matter how much you grow as a person, you're still the same.

"That's a cute Keychain, Y/n!"

"Thanks! I've loved this show since I was a kid!"

They'll prove it to you.

[yourfavwritersfavoritewriter]

movie night w/ patrick and art

a. donaldson x reader x p. zweig

warnings: 18+ mdni, threesome, fingering, blowjob, cuckoldry kinda, sub!art, jealous!patrick, rough fucking, unprotcted sex

word count: 1,427

a/n: trying new fic layouts btw so don't mind the inconsistency of the layouts lol

✧༝┉˚❋ ❋˚┉༝✧

you're sat between art and patrick while the three of you are doing your weekly movie night, coordinated by you. usually since it was your idea to do this weekly ritual you pick the movie. art and patrick are never really interested in it for that reason but they still try and pay attention half the time. this time though, it seemed like they were fixated on something else entirely; eachother. out of the corner of your eye you can see them staring at eachother.

"guys are you even watching the movie? you said you'd watch it this time!" you whined. you caught them several more times with their eyes fixated on one another rather than the screen. it annoys you but you just brush it off and go to the bathroom. "don't turn on anything else!" you yelled behind you.

several minutes later, you come back out of the bathroom and stop when you hear a wet sound. like the sound of making out. you start to get pissed off because they promised they would watch the movie you picked tonight and you thought they had turned on some stupid other movie. you're about to confront them when you hear a name leave one of their mouths. "pat-" a whine.

the lewd kissing noises started to turn into soft moans and whimpers. you peak your head around the corner to see art and patrick sticking their tongues down each other's throats. patrick palming art through his jeans. "shh," patrick whispered into art's ear, kissing the top of it. "she's gonna hear you."

"isn't that what you want?" art questions, still engrossed in the way patrick's big hand feels on his cock. "fuck," his hips are lifting into the air as he goes back into kiss patrick.

"uh hum!" you cough as you walk back into the living room to make your presence known. they scramble off of each other back to their original seats on the couch. your guys' eyes dart between each other, you looking between the two of them. you sit down and their eyes follow you. they sit meekly, not saying a word.

you look down to both of their crotches, their pants straining against their hard ons. "you guys always leave me out" you pout. they look between eachother, confused.

"what?" art shifts uncomfortably on his cushion. you lay your hand atop his thigh. art's stuck between a state of panic and horny when you trail your hand up to his erection. he looks to patrick for some kind of answer.

"it's kinda rude to fuck behind my back. i put this whole thing together for you." you dramatize your words, putting emphasis on the word fuck. "why do you guys get to have fun?"

"c'mere." patrick beckons. he locks his lips with yours, sloppy at first and then moving in tangent with each other. he places light kisses down from your cheek to your neck, sucking lightly at the skin. your eyes are closed, head lifted to the ceiling, as your hand travels to art's waistband where you pull his dick out. his tip is red and leaking, twitching in your hand.

"pat," you nudge him off your neck. "blow art." art whimpers and his pelvis jerks into your hand. his jaw is slack. patrick swiftly moves to where you're holding art, kneeling at the side of the couch. art's fucking dripping onto your knuckles, the pre cum sliding between your fingers. "you're so big, art. you think patrick could take all of it?"

"wouldn't be the first time" patrick chimes in. he wraps his lips around art's tip without another thought. with your hand still on art's shaft, you start stroking him using patrick's drool as lubricant.

"shiittt," art gasps. "fuck fuck," he moans at the sudden stimulation. his body goes into hyperdrive at the touch of you two. patrick's mouth is warm around his tip and your hand is oh so soft near his base. he's moaning both your names as he fucks into you guys, making patrick choke around him at the abrupt thrusts.

"he's taking you so well, art. look at him. drooling around your cock," patrick moans around art, sending shivers through art's spine. with his head tilt back his cries get louder and louder. you remove your hand from art's length to give patrick more space, causing art to whine at the loss of sensation. they turn into pants once more when patrick's envelops art completely. you move off the couch next to patrick and reach down to between his legs. he's as hard as a fucking rock; humping into the side of the couch like a pathetic dog. "you like sucking off your best friend? want me to get you off too?" you whisper into his ear. he groans, once again making art moan in turn.

patrick's cock springs out from confinement. he's so huge that when your hand wraps around it, it doesn't even cover half. the girth on that man too, jesus. he's practically crying when you start stroking him. his mouth falters around art as he moans from the pleasure. he's humping into your hand like his life depends on it.

"fuck, pat. i-i'm gonna cum. please." art begs as he fucks himself into patrick's mouth, getting ready to paint the back of his throat with his semen.

"cum, art. cum for him. fuck he wants it so bad. you should see the way he's fucking my hand right now," in a matter of seconds, art orgasms down patrick's throat with a loud moan followed by a long shudder. patrick swallows all of it, sticking out his tongue to you to prove it. "good boy." you praise and his head starts to spin.

"get up," patrick removes himself from your hand and bends you over the couch. he lines himself up to your entrance and pushes himself in til he bottoms out, making eye contact with art when he does. art's mouth is open like he wants to say something but can't. you both groan when the head of cock hits your cervix opening. "jesus, she's so tight." he's squeezing onto your hips with a bruising grip. "come here, art. rub her clit. she'll like it more." and art follows orders, using his two middle fingers to rub tight circles on your nub.

you're fucking shaking between the two of them, your legs trembling under you. patrick's fucking you so good he's making you see stars. you can barely control anything that comes out of your mouth. just profanities and lewd noises that your neighbors can probably all hear. "mhng- art. fuck, don't stop. you're doing so good." art's dick jumps at the praise and patrick's at anger. he's the one fucking you, why should art be called the good one? he increases his pace into you. the couch is creaking more than a broken headboard at this point but he doesn't let up. not until he's made you cum so hard on his dick you can't walk for days.

"pat- m'gonna cum." you say as you pussy clenches around him. you're practically screaming bloody mary when you cum around his dick. he doesn't stop fucking into you though. "fuck patrick. d-don't"

"don't what, sweetheart?" art's stops rubbing your clit and sits on his calves watching as patrick relentlessly fucks into you. "you don't like being split open on my cock?" he teases. you do. you just don't have the words to reply back. you bite the back of the couch as a second orgasm quickly washes over you.

he pulls out and jerks himself on over you ass, his cum landing on the small of your back and top of your ass. art groans at the sight. you collapse onto the couch with your back against art's leg and your head dangerously close to his now half-hard cock. art shyly runs his hand through your hand, combing your scalp with his finger nails. you're so tired you almost fall asleep like this. "fuck, you guys look a mess," patrick sneers.

"shut up," art retorts.

"hey, maybe next time you'll get to fuck her," patrick adds. art looks down to where your head is on his lap. his eyes are asking for confirmation and all you do is shrug with a lazy grin on your face. "you should've felt her, art." he goes on, bragging about you to him like you're not even there. you fall asleep to the sound of them arguing about who gets what part of you next.

[holybibly]

Bunnies, are you ready?

These are the unholy thoughts of the day: hot cowboys with a lactation kink and a strong oral fixation who find it difficult to keep their hands to themselves when they meet a pretty busty waitress in a saloon who works part-time as a breastfeeding nanny during the day.

Your town wasn't big, but it was certainly a picturesque place to relax, so when rumours spread through the bustling streets and saloons about four damn good-looking cowboys from the big city, you didn't pay much attention. Cowboys often came to your town to take a break from the hustle and bustle. For you, they were just extra income as hot, horny things dropped fabulous amounts of money in your saloon to drink and entertain.

Especially as you've been so busy lately with your part-time job as a breastfeeding nanny that all you can think about is how much your breasts ache from all that milk and how much you want to milk yourself to relieve their heavy weight and plumpness.

When a noisy, chaotic crowd poured into your saloon this evening, it took your table, and you didn't expect much. Just another customer on another night, but God, how wrong you were, especially when the blue-haired cowboy, whose name you later learned was Hongjoong, wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you onto his lap, playfully running his fingers into your deep cleavage.

"Sweet lady, will you join us today, hm?" He purred in your ear, pulling down the hem of your blouse slightly, exposing your plump, milky tits even more to the gaze of his friends.

"I don't think so." You slapped his arm, freeing yourself from his grip. The cocky cowboy grinned, letting you go easily but not losing sight of the wet stains on your blouse, and the other guy at once commented that.

"Pretty lady, is breast-feeding? Or is there a milkshake on the menu?" His cat-like eyes narrow and focus on your cleavage as his tongue runs along his bottom lip, leaving a wet, glistening mark.

"Lord, San, don't be so shameless; you can't say such things." Another guy, with long hair and scarlet lips, rebuked him. And you were about to thank him, but his next sentence made you abandon that idea completely. "I wouldn't mind tasting that milk, though. I bet the taste is simply divine."

"Hmm..." The last guy sitting in the corner of the booth hummed. "Are you free, doll, or is someone already milking your pretty tits?"

"Assholes," you hissed, adjusting your corset. The tension of the fabric on your sensitive nipples only made you leak more milk. You sighed heavily, wanting to get away from the brazen, shameless cowboys whose eyes were now literally devouring you.

"Oh, don't be angry, beautiful." The blue-haired guy laughed and leaned back against the soft wall of the booth. "I'm Hongjoong; this is Seonghwa." He pointed at a guy with long hair. "San, but you've heard his name before. And this is Mingi." He pointed to a tall guy in the corner of the booth. "We're new here, and you're so gorgeous; can you blame us for being interested? But still, do you have someone, or should we try our luck?"

You roll your eyes in annoyance and look from one guy to the other until your eyes meet Hongjoong's.

"You're not my type, stud. So calm down, place your order, or get out of here. You know, there are a lot of other people who would like to be in your place.".

"The only place I want to be right now is..." San didn't get to finish because Seonghwa covered his mouth with his hand, but he didn't have to finish for you to understand what he meant.

"Don't pay any attention to him, doll. San is a very straightforward guy, but he's harmless." Mingi said, leaning towards you, only to wrap his arm around your hips and pull you towards him. "You know what they say, doll, safe the horse, ride the cowboy. Want to try?"

"Isn't someone falling for that?" You ask, squirming in Mingi's arms.

"Usually it works, yes." Seonghwa notices and reaches out to you, cupping your chin with his fingers and forcing you to look into his eyes. "I hope you can ride horses well, because we're going to give you a real wild rodeo, little flower."

[samandcolbyownme]

Credit to the edit creator on TikTok for the Johnnie pictures!

This one shot is going to have reader being choked with a chain necklace, PLEASE DONT READ IF YOURE UNCOMFORTABLE!

Summary: anon request - "begging anyone that will listen to make sumthing based off this necklace bc the way he pulled it is rlly doing something to me"

Warnings: SMUT18+, strong language, choking will be a big part of this, hair pulling, unprotected sex, creampie, filth

I'm also going to be writing this my own way, so if you've seen the actual video it isn't going to be accurate.

Word count: 2.5k | not edited

TikTok I'm writing for specifically

╔═══━━━─── • ───━━━═══╗

You walk up to the front door of the house, giggling drunkly to yourself as you fish for your keys inside your purse.

You're just getting home from your night out with Tara, so Johnnie expect you to come home at least, somewhat drunk.

You push the door open, seeing the empty scene as you think, he must be streaming.

He was. As you walked back the hall, you heard the faint sound of him strumming his guitar from behind the door.

The closer you get, you can hear him faintly singing. You smile as you rest your head on the door, waiting for him to finish before you gently knock and open the door.

"Uh oh. Look who it is!" He smiles at you and leans his guitar against the desk, "Guy, y/n just got home from being with Tara. Should she come say hi?"

You roll your eyes, giggling as you shake your head. He holds his hand out, "Come hither. They want to say hi."

You sigh, pushing your body off the door frame as you walk over. You lean down, waving into the camera, "Hi guys!"

"Yeah, her outfit does look phenomenal tonight." Johnnie leans back, "She always looks good, to me anyway."

You look at him and stand up, "Thank you." He lays his hands on your hips, pulling you onto his lap, "You're going to finish this stream with me."

"No." You whine lightly with a laugh, "I need a shower."

"You can get one after. Guys. I've been teaching her how to play the guitar." Johnnie smiles and you look at the screen, "No. I'm not going to embarrass myself like that." You laugh, "No way!"

Johnnie lays his hand on your leg, weaving his fingers through the openings in your fishnet stockings, "Don't worry. I'll get her to open up and play for you."

You roll your eyes, moving to snake your arm around his neck, "Maybe." You smile down at him, "I'm going to get a water, do you want anything?"

He shakes his head, letting you stand up before he places his guitar back onto his lap. You leave, quickly making your way back after going to the fridge.

You slip in, sitting on the chair off to the side and in your still, slightly drunk state, Johnnie tugging on the metal chain around his neck starts to get your mind racing with such dirty thoughts.

You bite down on the inside of your lip, adjusting how you're sitting. Johnnie glances over at you, pulling the chain to adjust it and your eyes stay fixated on it.

He smirks slightly, looking back to the screen as he leans back, sliding his hand up his arm to push his sleeve up.

He looks so good tonight.

The combination of his hair, makeup, and outfit were all the absolute perfect combination.

You were secretly hoping his stream would be done soon, you didn't know how much longer you could take without his hands on your body.

"I'll play a snippet from my new song then I think I'm going to get off for tonight."

His words caused your excitement to grow.

You couldn't wait much longer for him to finally fulfill those words.

You sat there, elbow digging into the spot above your knee as your hand rests under your chin. Your eyes stay fixated on him and he knows you're watching.

He smirks at you, pushing up his sleeves as his guitar rests in his lap. Your lip pulls between your teeth as your head slightly tilts to the side.

You need him. Bad.

After a little bit more of listening to Johnnie sing, he finally ends the live and turns to you as he sets his guitar down.

"Get over here."

His words have you up on your feet with in a second after rolling off of his tongue. You walk over, straddling his lap and running your hands over the sides of his neck.

His hands slide over your hips and you whimper out a quiet, "Need you."

"I know." He smirks, "I could tell since you came home." He bites down on his lip ring and nods towards the door, "Come on."

You get up, taking his hand as he leads you to his room. He pulls you in front of him, hands on your waist as he guides you backwards into the room.

He reaches back, pushing the door shut before laying his hand on your neck, "You look so good." He leans in, connecting his lips to yours.

"I can say the same about you." You gently bite his lip, pulling it as you tilt your head back. A quiet gasp leaves his throat and his hand squeezes your hip, "Get these clothes off. Now."

You step back, turning to face him as he walks over to the bed. You bend down, unzipping your black boots so you can stand up and kick them off.

Your hands move to your belt, undoing it as your eyes fixate on the metal change wrapped around Johnnie's thumb, "That outfit is crazy hot."

You smile at his words, "I figured you'd like it." You throw your belt on the floor and slip your fingers into the hem of your red, lace crop bralette top.

Johnnie watches as you lift it up over your head, shaking your hair slightly as you toss it to the ground with your boots.

You lock eyes with Johnnie as you push your skirt down, leaving you in nothing but your black lace panties.

He holds his hands out, indicating he wants you to come to him, and you comply. You walk over to him, straddling his lap again. His hand slips down between your thighs and he smirks, "What's got you this turned on, sweetheart?"

"You want me to be honest?" You smirk slightly as Johnnie nods, "Always, baby."

Your hand drags up his chest, tangling the metal chain around your finger, "This. How fucking hot you looked while playing with it."

He licks his lips, "What do you want me to do with it?" He tilts his head, "Actually. Don't tell me, I'll just.." he trails off, lifting it up over his head and placing it around your neck.

His eyes scan over the chain hanging down between your boobs, "mm. I see what you mean." He smirks and grabs the chain, pulling you in to kiss him.

The kiss quickly turns heated, grinding down on him, moaning out as he bites down on your lip.

"P-please." You whimper out, desperate for his cock at this point, "Johnnie.”

He leans back, brushing hair from your face, "Hands and knees baby." You move off of him, crawling up the bed to hold your weight up with your hands pressed firmly into the bed.

You can hear Johnnie get undressed, but your mind is racing about one thing.

That chain tightening around your neck.

The bed dips down behind you and Johnnie slides your panties down, letting them drop to your knees, causing your heart rate to pick up.

It picks up drastically, when he slides a hand up your back and moves it under your hair to grab the chain.

He slowly and teasingly pulls it back, dragging it over your shoulders until it's pulled tight against your neck.

You gulp with excitement, knowing why Johnnie’s necklace was around your neck was exhilarating.

There’s just enough pressure, you can still breathe normal, but you can tell with one yank, your air supply will be cut well in half.

“Bring your ass up, baby.” Johnnie lays a hand on your hip and you drop your shoulders to the bed, the chain pulling tighter the further you move down towards the bed.

“You are so fucking sexy.” Johnnie says lowly as he admires the position you’re in. He grabs his cock, stroking it a few times before tapping the head of it against your wet slit.

You bite your lip, gripping the blanket below you as you feel him slowly push his cock into you.

You let out a moan, pushing your hips back to gain more of him.

He pulls the chain, causing it to grow tighter.

“Fuuuck.” He breathes out, fingers digging into your skin harder as he slides in more, “Shit.” You whimper at both the feeling of his cock and the chain tightening around your neck.

He wraps the chain around his hand, “Sit up a little for me.”

You rise up, holding your self up with your forearms on the bed. You tilt your head back and Johnnie leans forward to look down at you.

Your eyes lock with his, a strangled moan leaving your lips as he slowly pulls his cock out and slowly slides back in.

He bites his lip, watching your face twist with pleasure, “Does that feel good?”

You nod as best as you can, “Mm.”

“Is this what you wanted?” He asks and you open your eyes, whimpering out a small, “Y-yes.”

He smirks, leaning back, chain still wrapped around his hand, “I wanted to do this before you left, that little outfit you had on, fuck. It was so fucking sexy.”

He keeps the chain tight against your neck as he picks up his thrusts. It’s soon a punishing pace, the chain tightening more and more with each time his body connects with yours.

You try to moan, but you can’t.

Strangled noises leave your lips at random times.

Between the chain and Johnnie’s thrusts bringing you closer and closer to orgasm, your vision starts to go spotty.

You reach up, scratching at the chain and Jonnie loosens it. You take a deep breath as he leans forward, “You good?”

You nod, looking up at him weakly with a smile, “Uh huh. Keep going.”

He smirks, leaning back to resume his thrusts. He waits to tighten the chain, “I wanna hear ya.”

You let out a loud moan, pushing your hips back to meet his, “F-fuck.” You whine, “S-so close.” He lets go of the chain, gripping your hips to pull you back to him, slamming your body into his, “Shit.”

You drop your head down, moaning loudly as you clench around his cock, pulling the blankets as you finally hit that point.

“that’s it, baby.” Johnnie groans, “feels so good.”

Johnnie continues to fuck you, guiding you through your high before pulling out and rolling you over. Your eyes meet his as he leans down, grabbing the chain and wrapping it around his hand.

He pins it down beside your head, it tight against your neck.

He groans as he slips back into you, bringing your one leg up. His fingers dig into the outside of your thigh.

You whimper, eyes rolling back as his thrusts resume to being punishing. He leans down, crashing his lips onto yours.

You reach up, tangling your fingers into his hair, pulling, which earns a groan from him.

You loved hearing him, too.

“You’re so fucking good to me.” He whispers against your lips, “So fucking good.”

Your lips part as you watch him lean back, the chain loosening just enough for your moans to come out full volume.

He smirks, biting onto his lip as he closes his eyes. He tilts his head back, thrusts growing sloppy, “Fuck. Fuck.” He leans back down, tightening the chain once again as he rails into you.

The chain dulls your screamed moans as you drag your nails down his back. He groans loudly, “Fuckin hell.”

He dips his head down, lips attaching to yours as he pushes in, his cock twitching to coat your walls white.

He keeps his lips on yours, moving them in a slow rhythm with yours as he lets go of the chain. You take a deep breath as he moves to plant kisses on your cheek.

“You sure you’re okay?” He whispers as he brushes his finger over your neck. You turn your head to face him, “I’m good, baby.”

He picks your lips, sitting up to pull out and stand up.

He grabs his shirt and wipes off your thighs, “I really hope that wasn’t too hard.” He glances up at you as you sit up and you shrug, “Aw well.”

You laugh slightly which causes him to laugh, “I can’t believe you talked me into that.”

“I didn’t talk you into anything.” You stand up, “But I will talk you into going for a shower with me.”

“If I ever say no to that, use that chain and choke me out until I’m dead.” He walks over to you, wrapping an arm around your waist as he leads you to the bathroom.

The next morning, you wake up, sitting up to stretch as you look over at Johnnie, who’s still sleeping.

He was up late last night editing a video, so you decided to let him sleep in. You go out and start to make some breakfast before the curiosity of whether or not the chain left a mark gets the best of you.

You set down your mug and make your way to the bathroom. You flick on the light and as soon as your eyes meet your neck in the mirror, they grow wide and your mouth drops open.

“Oh fuck.” You cover your mouth, leaning in to drag your fingers down over the chain like bruise that circles around your neck, “Fuck.”

You laugh slightly, shaking your head. You look towards the open doorway as you hear Johnnie’s door open, “y/n.”

“Bathroom, babe.” You call out, leaning against the counter to wait for him. He walks around the corner, hand ruffling his hair, “What are ya doing?”

You bite your lip, “Um. I was just-“

“Holy fuck!” Johnnie drops his hands and move towards you, placing them on the sides of your neck.

His thumbs trace over the mark, “What the fuck.” He looks up at you and you can’t help but laugh, “I know. That’s why I came in here.”

Johnnie laughs in shock, “Jesus Christ.”

“It could be worse.” You shrug and Johnnie looks at you. You lean in, “I liked it. I promise. I’ll just cover it up with necklaces and stuff. No worries.”

“You are one freaky slut, you know that?” Johnnie slides his hands down to your hips and you pull him closer to you, “Those sound like fighting words.”

“Maybe they are.” He raises his brows and tilts his head, “what do ya say? Hmm. Wanna go a few rounds?”

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

Thank you guys for being patient and thank you for reading! I truly appreciate and love you all so much! I hope you enjoyed this! 🖤

Likes and reblogs are greatly appreciated!

[bittersweet-folder]

~□☆ seventeen imagines:

☆Types of kinks I think Seventeen has [hyung line version]

[ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT JUST FUCK OFF IF YOU DON'T LIKE THINGS LIKE THESE:) ]

[ Maknae line version ]

• masterlist • ps: reader here is a female with vagina and breasts and identifies as a female as well •

☆Seungcheol: (soft dom who goes hard eventually)

Breeding kink: this man wants kids so bad. Of course he'll talk with you about it and if you don't want kids he'll still love to fill you up with your consent of course.

Foreplay: please we all know he radiates big dick energy. Hence he needs to prepare you well before he uses the actual thing.

Very light bondage: loves tying up your hand with a piece of silk cloth

Creampie: he can and will make you cum more than once. And will make you squirt too <3

Praise kink: He. Has. A. Huge. Praise. Kink. He literally worships you and your body and well how good you're doing.

Daddy kink: self explanatory im hoping.

Thigh riding: he loves to see you struggle to get off, on his thigh without his help.

Extras: he's always so ready to try different positions when you tell him to.

☆Jeonghan: (switch with a sub lean who teases you a lot)

Edging: this man loves, literally loves to control your orgasm so that you cum hard later.

Oral fixation: either you are giving him the best head of his life or he's pussy drunk so he's eating you out like there's no tomorrow.

Sensory deprivation: he loves it when you blindfold him he loves the adrenaline rush he gets while anticipating what you might do next.

Pegging: he took a lot of time to open up about this and when he did he had the best experience ever.

Degradation: when he's taking control he will be like "only my fucking cock can make you feel this way and make a moaning mess of you right kitten" and so on<3

Overstimulation: he wants, sorry needs you to push his limits. It goes the same way around for you as well.

Extras: this man is very vocal. He will moan loudly. And has the ability to make you moan loudly as well.

☆Joshua: (the soft yet mean asf dom)

Edging: he loves to see how frustrated you get when he stops and doesn't lets you cum.

Shower sex: very self explanatory I'm hoping

Cockwarming: the warm feeling of your pussy around his cock. He loves it when you squeeze around his cock too.

Dacryphilia: he loves to make you cry on his cock, literally loves to see how desperate you become to reach your orgasms. "Fucking hell you're so pretty when you cry baby" that's what Joshua says.

Squirting: again, he loves to make you cry so he would push your limits a little bit if you give him the consent.

Praise kink: "being such a good girl for me yeah" "you're doing so fucking good baby" "you're driving me crazy do you realize that" yeah this man would go crazy.

Extras:he sometimes would let you ride<3 he would have his hands grabbing your hips while you ride him and cry on his cock<3.

☆Jun: ( soft dom through and through until he's- well- all riled up )

Edging: with his fingers and mouth until he uses the real thing.

Marking: he loves, literally loves to give you hickeys on your neck.

Creampie: he can and will make you cum twice to fill you up.

Overstimulation: he's soo pussy drunk he craves and needs more.

Bondage: he likes tying your hands only if you're okay with it and will try something new as well if you talk about it to him.

Sensory deprivation: he loves to blindfold you. Also he's into wax play

Mirror sex: this man's a menace as we all know. He literally loves the position where you're bent over on the edge of the bed while the mirror right beside the bed displays everything. He'll make you look at yourself while whispering "see how it's me who makes you scream like this baby". Yeah he's a menace.

Extras: he has a thing for you in lingeries because he loves foreplay.

☆Wonwoo (soft to kinda hard dom)

Edging: he enjoys it so much when you get frustrated because he isn't letting you cum. Oh and he will make you cry outta too much pleasure later on.

Dacryphilia: he will make you cry on his cock. No one can stop.

Choking: I hope that's self explanatory or should I say he loves it when silent moans slip from your lips and squirm a bit under him.

Daddy kink: I mean you can't convince me that this man doesn't have a daddy kink.

Degradation: oh he gets cocky on how you're crying on his cock begging for more.

Thigh riding: he loves it when you ride his thigh while hold onto him and he will kiss you while doing so with his hand on your hips while the other hand caressing through your hair.

Very light bondage: like tying your hands or just holding your hands together by the wrist while he thrust hard.

Extras: he has a thing for skirts because he likes how it slides up to your waist during the process and how easy access he gets as well, he can and will make you sit on his lap.

☆Woozi (switch with a dom lean but a switch)

Foreplay: he loves the intimacy of those kisses and touches all over each other's body before the actual thing takes place.

Creampie: this man loves it in a messy way with his cum dripping outta your pussy.

Squirting: told ya he loves it so so messy getting his freaking studio couch wet.

Slight like very slight exhibitionism: since he's fucking you in his studio.

Reverse cowgirl: this man loves literally lovesss groping your ass.

Mommy kink: he has a mommy kink you can't tell me otherwise. He gets very vocal when you ride him. He loves it when you take control and make a mess of him.

Praise kink: showers you with praise and makes you remember that you're the prettiest girl he's ever laid his eyes on.

Extras: he'll make you sit on his cock for hours when he's working. He relishes that warming yet tight feeling of your pussy.

☆Hoshi: (a pure switch with a slight sub lean)

Marking: he loves leaving bite marks and hickeys on your neck and chest.

Mommy kink: he'll moan so fucking loudly and lewdly when you ride and call him a babyboy.

Praise kink: it goes both ways. He showers you with praise. You shower him with praise as well.

Orgasm control: in other words edging. He has to see you struggling to cum. He wants you to beg for it as well.

Oral fixation: he's so pussy drunk too. He'll eat you out as well as finger you until you can't take it any more.

Creampie: another man who loves it so so messy. He'll make you squirt eventually as well and then he'll eat you out just to overstimulate you more.

Overstimulation: the sight of you squirming and crying on how good he makes you feel is literally heaven to him

Extras: he has a great stamina and will go on all night long in various positions until you're crying. He likes to bend you over on the table the most.

~~☆~~

a/n: I'm working on that Hoshi fanfic presently but i can't guarantee you when exactly I'll post.

Also here's the taglist till now: @hongmingoo @shuabby1994 , @nishloves , @unlikelysublimekryptonite , @asyre , @yumiyumis-blog

[If anyone wants to be in the taglist please comment under this post]

[enree9h]

LAST HOUR | sjy

✮ PAIRING : fwb!jake x fem!reader

✮ SYNOPSIS : Time runs closer to midnight. With barely an hour left for Jake's birthday to end, you rush to get to him after having forgotten about it for the entire day. But Jake doesn't plan on letting you slide with it so easily so he makes you pay for it until midnight.

✮ WARNINGS : SMUT, p in v, unprotected s.ex, cursing, making out (lmk if I missed smth!)

✮ wc : 1.5k+

✮ a/n : this was supposed to be a Hoon fic ( my ass has been fixated on him for the past week, INTENSE hoon brainrot) but I hadn't released a Jake fic yet SOO. And to be quite honest- re reading it, I feel like it fits Jake better, dk. what do you think??

MDNI

Bursting through the doors of the club, your eyes frantically scan the crowd for him. The music is loud, almost deafening and you feel the bass seep into your body. The lights dim to a red so dark that it takes you a whole minute to adjust your vision to the lowered brightness of the place. You were late by twenty-three hours to be exact and the guilt that came with it did not help your case. When you finally caught the tiniest glimpses of him you felt your shoulders relax. 

He hadn't spotted you amidst the bustling crowd yet or so you thought.

With the restroom close in sight, you decide to step in for a quick minute before meeting him. Stumbling through your apartment at the last second did not leave you with much time in hand. And having to cover the twenty minute drive to this place meant you had to use up the time you could've spent looking decent. 

So you slip through the crowd and into the silence of the restroom. The faint sound of music flows through the cracks in the door but the sudden noise of a door being banged shut jerks you out of your internal rambles. 

“Someone finally decided to show up”, his tone has an icy bite to it and it doesn't fail to cut right through you. “Jake” you begin but when he walks up to you the mellow scent of wood and smoke hits you.

 “Look,” you utter but he comes to a halt right in front of you, his gaze burning right into your fidgety self, “I’m really sorry.” 

When he attempts to get closer you inch backwards until you meet the wall. “No you're not”, his arms slip around your waist and when he leans in you feel his lips graze yours. His hands travel lower until they reach your ass and you feel his nails dig into your skin through the silk of your skirt. “I was just too wrapped up in helping Jay move,” you say in a hushed whisper. 

Jake feels his frustration reach new heights at the mention of his friend, “Oh come on”, Jake scoffs.

“It’s always him”, his lips find your jaw, “but by the end of the day”, you feel him suck on the exposed skin of your neck, “It’s my cock you’re gagging on”, he lightly bites into your flesh, purple blooms over the expanse of your skin, “isn't that right angel?” 

When you attempt to respond he does not let any further words fall out of your mouth because the very next second he’s pulling you in, crashing his lips onto yours. His nails dig into the skin of your hips and you flinch when you feel him bite into the plump flesh of your already swollen lips. His fingers are on your thighs until you watch them slide under your skirt, pushing it up, leaving your skin exposed, all for him. 

“Waited for you all day though", he whispers against your lips and you feel the guilt render your body lose in his hold. “I’m so sorry Jake” but your words go unheard and when you catch his eyes you understand why. 

When his fingers reach your soaking core you gasp and lean on the walls, your back arching at the contact. Jake watches you squirm under him and he loves it. He loves the sight of your teeth sinking into your bottom lips, and the feeble attempts you make at concealing the guttural sounds that left your lips. But Jake was just getting started so when he presses his knuckles into your pulsating core you throw your head back and bite your hand until it left your skin dotted with red. “Let me hear you, angel” 

He is quick to hoist you up against the wall and your trembling legs wrap around his midsection with practised ease. With your underwear out of his way and dangling at your ankle, he is running his thumb over your clit. “Jake oh go-” but when he drives his finger inside of your dripping hole you see stars. 

“Already clenching around me baby?” His voice is hoarse and the sound of it with his finger buried in you drives you over the edge but Jake doesn't stop there. The moan you let out when he inserts another finger inside leaves Jake feeling for the bulge in his jeans. The sight of your whimpering self grinding on his fingers, drenched in your wetness, pressed against the walls of a random club restroom was enough to make him go feral for a feel of his throbbing cock buried in your tight hole.

You feel his knuckles drive into you without thought, every thrust leaves you shaking against him, your underwear slides off your ankles and falls to the floor but you couldn't care less. “So good Jake” you manage to whisper, your voice blanketed with lust.

“oh yeah?” the bite in his voice goes unnoticed by you. The tightening knot in your abdomen makes you deaf to any and every sound but the trance doesn't last for long because Jake is quick to pull his fingers out.

“Seriously?” your body which was previously shuddering with the onset of a release is now slumped in his hold. You were so close, a light press of his knuckles against your clit would result in you coming undone but he had to make you beg for it, pay for what you did to him today. 

Jake leans in to press a quick peck against your lips and with a devious smile plastered on his face he whispers “My turn”, with that you are flipped around, your palms hit the mirror on the wall and your upper body is left bending over the sink. 

You barely get a second to compose yourself before he plunges into you. “Jake oh my god” your screams bounce off the walls of the empty restroom, cutting through the feeble sounds of music from the party. 

“So tight for me baby” Jake’s voice doesn't sound like his anymore, the hold of his fingers on your hips tightens with every relentless thrust into you. Your breath fogs the mirror and when you attempt to glance at your reflection you catch Jake's eyes in the mirror. 

“Look at yourself”, one of his hands comes to wrap around your waist as he reaches for your clit, “letting me fuck you dumb” he's rubbing circles on your bud with a growing pace and you feel your body lose any and all control. Your legs tremble under the rush of such intense pleasure but Jake never attempts to slow down. 

“Jake I think I'm-”, the sounds of your wetness fill the air and you feel your face heat up with embarrassment. Jake thrusts his hips until he feels the tip of cock reach your cervix. Your palms slip over the smooth fogged up glass and your nails scratch against it as Jake pounds into you with a newfound energy. “F- feels so good angel”  he bends and attaches his lips to your nape, pressing sloppy kisses to your shoulder blades. 

The next second he is straightening back up, grabbing your hips and driving right into you. His eyes are glazed over, breath uneven and he seems to be in a daze so intense that all your screams go unheard. 

“Wish me”, you hear him say, his words coming out in pants but your mind was clouded and your spine arching under the pleasure, too engaged to respond. 

You feel his fingers on your clit, “Wish me, angel”, and when he pinches your bud you cry out from the stimulation and that is when you hear him. 

“H-happy-” he drives in deeper, “Birthda- oh god” when he flips you around and hoists you over the sink, your ass on the edge, you look into his eyes and instantly feel your body react to it. Dilated pupils, mouth half open, skin flushed red and the sweat that ran down his neck onto his exposed chest left you gasping for air. 

Jake leans in to nuzzle in the crook of your neck as he mercilessly plunges into you, wet kisses line your skin. Your head lolls back and when you feel his cock twitch inside of your throbbing core you spread your thighs further for him. 

“Fuck” his voice seeps into your skin and leaves you trembling in his hold until you feel him go slack. 

He moves inside of you and with one last thrust, you feel the knot in your belly unwind. 

You sit, shaking in his hold, coming down from the high. 

Your hands come to sit on his shoulders and you push him to stand in between your legs. Jake throws his head back in response and the groan that falls out of his lips makes you want to part your thighs further but you hold back. 

“Hey” you hold his face in your hands, “Happy birthday Jake” you whisper and lean in to plant a soft kiss on his lips. When you pull away lightly he leans in further to catch your lips again so chuckle against his mouth and give in.

[redeyerhaenyra]

What sex toys would T141 use?

Summary: title :) headcanons of what sex toys I think t141 would use

Warnings: heavy smut! various elaborate sex toys, bit of electric shock play in Johnny's, phone sex, brief mention of anal beads, Simon being too hard on himself, Simon being touched starved, Simon being.. Simon, let me know if I've missed anything!

Notes: Getting this out to feed you all as I'm STILL working on that Simon smut I promised and it's only at 2k words 😭

Kyle Garrick

Kyle is a confident man

He knows what he likes, he isn't afraid to buy and try new toys

He has some anal beads for himself, doesn't use them all the time

Only when he's having an extra special night to himself✨️

He has one of those clear fleshlights

Kyle's a bit of a voyeur he likes watching himself 😏

Also has an extensive lube collection

Like, different kinds

Flavoured, tingly, aphrodisiac, ect

He'll change what lube he uses depending on his mood :P

Johnny Mactavish

Oh Johnny

Johnny Johnny Johnny

Look up the word "horny" in the dictionary a picture of this man's face comes up

He spends his hard earned military paycheck on those vibrating, self thrusting fleshlights with fucking handles on the outside

Also has a vibrating cock ring that will occasionally send little electric shocks through his cock :D

Like to think he also has just a plain dildo

Sometimes to use on himself, sometimes to suck on whilst he's fucking the fleshlight

Again, look up the phrase "oral fixation" there's a picture of his goddamn face

He also has one of those fake pussies and some fake silicone boobies for the same reason

He wants to suckle a clit or a boob in his mouth can you blame him?

He also will push the fake tits together and fuck them :P

The only reason THE ONLY REASON he doesn't take all these on deployment with him is that they wouldn't fit in his bag

Simon Riley

Poor Simon

He half thinks he doesn't deserve self pleasure

And half is kinda clueless when it comes to it other than the classic fist with a bit of spit as lube

He has fantasies about getting a generic fleshlight but he's also like

"Who would I need that I have my hands"

Like cmon Simon treat yourself 😭

Has thought about full on 300 quid sex dolls

The ones that are literally just. A silicone person

He'd never actually get one but occasionally he's so touched starved and needing to hold someone close he thinks about genuinely purchasing one 😭

John Price

I like to think John's taste in sex toys is... refined

Posh, even

I know it's so cliche to say John is old-fashioned but I truly believe he wouldn't ever dream of using modern male sex toys

They are "barbaric", he says, "teaches young men to only value a woman's body for sex".

No no, John won't be partaking in anything like that

He, a gentleman, uses phone-sex lines

To physically get off he'll use his fist, but he'll almost never do it without calling a.. "woman of the night".. and seducing her with his dulcet tones

He considers it a failure if the fine lady he's speaking with isn't also enjoying herself just as much as he

Really gets him going to be the source of someone else's, a professional pleasurers, pleasure

[zoe-oneesama]

Not to say either of them is right here, but what's wrong with the ice cream guy? I haven't kept up with the show proper in several seasons, so I'm probably very out of touch.

He is The Villain of ML in my heart.

His magic ice cream is wildly inconsistent. It's Soulmate Ice Cream! Except when it's Just Friend Ice Cream! Well, until he ONLY gives ice cream to lovers, NOT good friends who have fun together! But sometimes he gives ice cream to couples that DO break up! What are the rules? WHO CARES, CERTAINLY NOT ANDRE! I can't even put stock in his ability ACTUALLY being magic when it's constantly contradicting itself. I'm pretty sure he's just convinced himself that he has magic when he doesn't and his ego is easily bruised if anything pulls him out of his fantasy.

Plus he inexplicably always blames Marinette every time he's akumatized, no matter how far he has to stretch to do so. Once when she didn't even interact with him directly!

The first time because she went home without eating his "Soulmate Ice Cream(tm)" by herself as a 5th wheel. Because, what, her leaving meant his ice cream "failed"? Wasn't the point that two people are supposed to share the ice cream for the magic to work? But because she was like "no thanks", he swears revenge on her???

The second time because he was so invested in shipping two strangers that he got mad at Marinette for...being seen in public with one leg of the ship? After Ladybug had made it perfectly clear that she and Chat Noir were NOT a couple and so Chat Noir has the right to have fun with whoever he wants to???? Because "my ice cream is never wrong"?!?!

It didn't seem to work out for Lukanette or Adrigami so I don't know where you get the gall to even continue to make that bullshit claim, but OKAY.

And the third time, HE had the audacity to blame HER for making him "lose faith in ice cream and love" when he REFUSED TO SERVE HER! He flat out denied her and Chat Noir ice cream because he doesn't make "good friend" ice cream despite them BEING ON A DATE, and then has the GLUTEN FREE AUDACITY to be mad when tHEY are UPSET by it!

Oh but that wasn't a problem in "Wishmaker" when it was Marinette sharing with Luka, but sure, make up new things just so you can get mad about it, that makes sense.

I also have a personal vendetta against him for being the one to out Marinette's feelings for Adrien to Adrien. After 4 seasons of build up, this is how Adrien finds out? Horrible, vile, detention, exile, I hate him. I mean I've been done with him since "Heart Hunter"/"Miracle Queen", but they just loooooove to PILE IT ON.

Like, wouldn't it make more sense for Andre to have been the one person to see through the Love Square? Even if he didn't fully understand it, since Ladybug = Marinette and Chat Noir = Adrien, wouldn't it just make sense for Magic Ice Cream to be able to see past that because They're Soulmates(tm)? But he's only invested in ONE of the pairings, not even like two of the pairings that are seemingly unrelated. He is NEVER as passionate about Adrienette as he is about LadyNoir...but why???? Why is he so blase about Marinette going with Luka or Adrien being with whoever when he can't even handle Chat Noir LAUGHING with a girl who Isn't Ladybug?

They never even have fun and explore what he'd do if he caught a Ladrien date, would he be angry at Adrien like he is with Marinette, or does he just have it out for her specifically?

At this point I'm just convinced he's only so invested in the LadyNoir pairing because he's publicly endorsed them so much and if they don't end up together he'll be outed for being a Hack Fraud. His fixation on two teenagers becoming a couple as a grown adult and falling to pieces just because Marinette has other ways to have fun instead of eating Ice Cream she doesn't even get to choose the flavor of...

Yeah, throw him in jail Chloe.

[itsjaywalkers]

a little silly jegulus for my darling @veryinnovative !! happy birthday ino MWAH <333 (very very light nsfw)

"What the fuck did I just walk into?"

Regulus doesn't even bother to look up from where he's sitting on the floor, head between his knees as he waits for God—or whoever is up there, really, he isn't fussed—to fucking smite him. He does, however, let out a pitiful sound, both in acknowledgement and as a response. It doesn't explain much, he's aware of that, but Barty knows him enough at this point. He doesn't require anything else from him.

"Yeah, I can see you're having a bit of a breakdown," Barty huffs out, and Regulus hears his steps, light and careful, getting closer to him. "What brought it on this time, though? I literally just went to the corner shop to grab some Redbulls. It's been 15 minutes since I left and you were fine."

Regulus makes another pathetic noise, still refusing to raise his head. This one is a bit more petulant, because Barty has a talent for bringing out his pettiest side, even when he's experiencing unknown levels of distress.

"Babe, I'm gonna need you to give me something else," Barty insists, before sighing heavily. His walking comes to a halt, and Regulus doesn't need to check to know he's standing right in front of him.

He groans, but decides to be merciful, despite being aware that Barty knowing about what's upsetting him this much won't do him any favours. Barty can be a surprisingly supportive friend when it matters, but he's insufferable when he's right.

Regulus lifts his arm and points to his left, hoping he's being accurate enough, considering he isn't even looking. He keeps the position for a couple of seconds before dropping the arm back down, going back to hugging his legs tightly.

Barty begins moving once again, but stops after taking a few steps. "And what the fuck does that mean?" Barty exclaims, and Regulus can picture him throwing his hands up in the air. It almost drags a smile out of him. "You pointed at the couch. Am I supposed to believe our couch attacked you?"

Regulus exhales loudly through his nose, but doesn't deign that with a response.

"Because even if it did, Reg, I'm sorry to say you're gonna have get over yourself and your cute little breakdown. That couch cost us a fortune, and it's where Rosie first kissed me, so I refuse to—"

A sudden buzz interrupts Barty's train of thought. It makes Regulus' blood go cold, and he attempts to bury his face even deeper between his legs, a pained moan escaping his mouth as his face burns.

"What was that?" Barty mumbles, pacing around their living room. "Was it your phone? Why don't you have your phone on you?"

Regulus lets out a grumble, burrowing himself tighter in his own embrace while he listens to his best friend search for the origin of the sound.

It buzzes again, and Regulus is this close to grab the stupid device and throw it out the window, when Barty clicks his tongue, some ruffling following the noise.

"There it is," he says quietly. "Why the hell did you bury it under all the cushions? I know you're not a big fan of it, but this is simply—"

Realisation dawns on Regulus way too late, and by the time he snaps his head up, clumsily trying to get back on his feet as fast as possible but only ending up on his knees, Barty already has his phone in his hands. His eyes are wide, lips slightly parted, and he seems to be reading Regulus' notifications.

He's never regretted giving him his password as much as this instant.

"Barty, that's not—" Regulus starts, strained.

"Oh my fucking god," Barty murmurs, gaze fixated on the screen of the phone. He's not even blinking, and the stupid thing buzzes again, lighting up with a new message.

"Shut up," Regulus says, the blush on his face worsening by the second, as if it knows what's coming.

"I told you," Barty responds, still not looking away from Regulus' phone. "I fucking told you, dude—"

"Shut up!" Regulus repeats in a hiss, pushing himself up a little shakily but managing to regain his balance, not even hesitating before beginning to make his way towards his friend. "Give me my phone back!"

"No way," Barty snorts, dodging Regulus at the very last second, barely avoiding getting tackled into the couch. "This is too good, Reg, I can't believe you fucked up this badly. I would've killed myself if I were you—"

"Shut the fuck up!" Regulus snarls, cheeks aflame while he follows Barty around their apartment, attempting to get his phone back. "As if you're not completely shameless—"

"At least I've never been caught screenshotting my crush's thirst traps—"

"He's not my crush! I literally cannot stand him!"

Barty barks out a laugh, and it makes him falter enough for Regulus to get ahold of the hem of his shirt. However, his grasp is too loose, and Barty breaks away from it before Regulus can tighten it and finally take back what's rightfully his.

"Tell that to the dozen screenshots of his shirtless pics you have in your gallery."

Regulus makes an outraged sound, doubling his efforts, the heat in his face becoming almost unbearable as he chases his annoying best friend.

"That's an invasion of privacy!" he yells, grabbing one of the cushions and throwing it at Barty's head. He hits him right on the face, and it makes him feel considerably better, especially when Barty gives him his most deadpan expression. "Why are you in my gallery?"

"Well, Reg, after reading Potter's texts I got curious. I thought 'it can't be that bad, Reg is subtler than this' but it definitely can be that bad—"

"Stop! You're making such a big deal out of it, there's barely any—"

"Reg, babe, you have a folder just dedicated to James Potter's snapchats."

"It's for better organisation—"

"You must've been blowing his phone up with all those screenshots. Honestly, I don't understand how he hansn't blocked your creepy ass yet—"

"I know you aren't lecturing me about being creepy. You just aren't. Or do I have to remind you the kind of shit you pulled back when Evan wasn't giving you the time of day—"

"The joke's on you, idiot, Rosie is very much into my creepy shit," Barty retorts, stopping for a second just so he can put his hands on his hips and stare down at Regulus. "Although, I suppose Potter must like your freak behaviour too, considering how desperate he seems to be about getting you to reply. Not like I'm surprised, it's gotta be a boost to his massive ego—"

"Stop. Stop. Stop fucking talking—" Regulus lunges at him once more, but Barty is prepared every fucking time, avoiding him without breaking a sweat. "This is all your fault!"

Barty gapes at him. "How is this my fault? I warned you, dude! I told you people get notifications when you screenshot their stories—"

"Well, you didn't warn me hard enough!" Regulus schreeches, burying his hands inside his curls and pulling frantically. He feels like he's a breeze way from losing his shit. "James followed me back out of fucking nowhere, even though I was on my secret account, and then he began texting me all these things. Teasing me, making fun of me, always so fucking full of himself. And as if that weren't bad enough, then my brother also texted me just to sent me a voice note of himself laughing his ass off for two minutes—"

"I don't blame him," Barty snorts with a shake of his head. "Doesn't he live with Potter?"

"Yes. Yes, he does," Regulus mumbles, nearly hysterical. "And I really didn't need the reminder—"

"Sorry, sorry." Barty doesn't sound sorry in the slightest. "Listen, it might not be as bad as you think. Potter will get tired of you ignoring him soon, and then he'll give up and drop it, and this will just become an anecdote that we'll all laugh about in a couple of months. I mean, I'm already laughing."

Regulus stops trying to tear his hair out for a moment, narrowed eyes focusing on his best friend as he squirms in his place, shifting the weight from one foot to another. "You think so?"

"I know so," Barty assures him, and his confidence is somehow relieving, even though Regulus knows better than to trust anything that comes out of his big mouth. "You can finish having you breakdown, if you want, but you have nothing to—"

Another buzz cuts Barty off. The noise makes Regulus tense up almost unconsciously, because after today, he doesn't think he'll be able to listen to the bloody sound without having a heart attack. His shoulders relax slightly a second later, before going stiff once more when the buzzing doesn't stop.

"Oh," Barty whispers, eloquently. "Someone's calling."

"Don't—"

"Potter is calling."

"Fuck," Regulus says, with feeling. "Fuck."

"Yeaaaah," Barty drawls, gaze jumping from the vibrating phone in his hand to Regulus' panicked face. He's wearing that irritating shit-eating grin of his. "Forget what I said. I was lying anyway. You're fucked, dude."

"Shut your fucking mouth and hang up," Regulus snaps, heart beating so violently he can feel it in his fucking throat.

Barty tilts his head to the side, considering. Regulus gives him a warning look, getting mildly sick at the way in which Barty's smirk only appears to spread even wider. "Where's the fun in that, though?"

Regulus feels himself go pale, bile climbing up his throat. He swallows it back down with some struggle, his insides burning.

"You wouldn't," he mumbles, his phone still ringing.

"Wouldn't I?" Barty questions, arching in an eyebrow.

"Barty—"

His best friend is picking up the phone even before Regulus has finished uttering his name. Barty presses the device next to his ear a second later, and there's an almost manic quality to his grin.

"Hey, Potter," he greets, voice filled with glee. Regulus almost screams. "Yeah, yeah, he's here, why?"

Regulus shakes his head furiously, hands moving widely and forming cross after cross, despite Barty ignoring every single one of his signs. His best friend starts walking towards him, and Regulus retreats hastily until his back meets the wall.

"Oh, you wanna speak to him?" Barty is saying into the phone, gaze never leaving Regulus. "And it's urgent? Hm."

Please, Regulus says inaudibly, the perfect picture of desperation.

There's a pause, and for a brief moment, Regulus thinks Barty is about to take pity on him. Put an end to the joke before it ruins what's left of Regulus' dignity.

But Barty is Barty, and considering he seems to feed on Regulus' misery, he ends up smiling big, showing all of his teeth, before he gives James another affirmative reply and then he's handing the phone to Regulus.

He's convinced that Barty has never spoken this politely to James, but Regulus supposes that Barty is more than willing to put his hatred aside when the goal is to take the piss out of him.

Regulus clutches the phone and slowly, his hand shaking, he presses it to his ear. He doesn't say anything, but he lets out a shuddery exhale.

"Regulus?" James murmurs at the other side of the line, and the sound of his voice is nearly enough for him to drop the phone.

"Yeah?" he responds after a beat, the word coming out surprisingly calm.

"Finally done ignoring me?" James questions, and Regulus closes his eyes tight, turning away from Barty's figure. If he has to keep staring at him poorly repressing his laughter, he'll end up murdering him.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Regulus sniffs.

"Oh, don't you?" James chuckles, amused, and Regulus hates the havoc that that mere noise wrecks inside his guts. "There's nothing to be ashamed of, love. I'm very flattered, you know?"

"I bet you are," Regulus bites back, glaring at nowhere in particular. "It really isn't what you think—"

"No? You haven't been taking screenshots of all my shirtless pics?"

"Not all of them were shirtless pics," Regulus complains weakly.

James laughs again, louder this time, and it fill his chest with warmth. "True. I think there was a couple of selfies, too."

"And that one pic with your little cousin," Regulus adds, because he hates himself, apparently.

Barty's cackles turn unbearable, and Regulus' fingers twitch around his phone. He's making a run for his room a second later, slamming the door right behind him, even though the walls are so thin he can still hear the faint sound of his best friend's laughter.

"Ah, yes," James hums, seemingly deep in thought. "That one threw me off a little."

"How so?"

"You see, I assumed you were just collecting wanking material—"

"James!" Regulus hisses through gritted teeth, so ridiculously flustered he feels mildy dizzy. "Don't be disgusting!"

"Nothing wrong with that," James rushes to say, and Regulus hates how sincere he sounds. How pleased.

"Really? You wouldn't find it weird? Knowing that I—that someone has masturbated to your pictures?"

"Well, have you?"

"You wish."

"I do," James retorts without missing a beat, always so shameless. "It'd make me feel better about all the times I've jerked off to the thought of you."

Regulus sits down on the edge of his bed, knees failing him and ears ringing. He swears he can feel his soul leaving his body.

"What?" he says, voice embarrasingly high-pitched.

"What?" James repeats it with a laugh, as if this is all very amusing to him. "Say, love, what are you wearing right now?"

Regulus pulls his phone away from his ear momentarily, blinking at the screen. The call is real, and still ongoing, even though Regulus is certain he must be imagining this whole conversation, because there's simply no way.

"No," he retorts robotically as soon as the phone is back against his ear.

"No?" James inquires, some hesitance slipping into his tone.

"We're not doing this," Regulus insists.

"And what's 'this', hmm?"

"You know what! I don't know what game you're playing, Potter, but I want no part in it."

"There's no game, love. I mean this."

"No, you don't."

"No offence, Reg, but I think I know what I want better than you do."

Regulus laughs, but it's nervous, and shaky, and forced. "And what do you want?" he asks, trying his best to sound as mocking as possible. Regulus isn't sure he does a good job. "Me?"

"Yeah. Yeah. I want you so bad it's actually driving me insane."

Regulus lets out a choked off noise, and the urge to throw his phone against the wall is so strong he has no idea of how he manages to supress it.

There's a moment of silence, and then, "Regulus," James calls him again, and he straightens up as a reflex. "What are you wearing right now?"

Regulus rolls his lower lip between his teeth, pressing his thighs together. "Just some shorts and one of Barty's shirts."

There's a sharp inhale of breath.

"I hate that," James grumbles, and Regulus can feel himself frown.

"Well, I'm sorry it's not anything sexy, but I wasn't expecting—"

"No, no, it's not that, love, you look gorgeous in everything."

Regulus puts the back of his hand over his mouth, despite the fact that there's no one to see his smile.

"Then?" he questions.

"I just—you're wearing his clothes."

"Who's? Barty's?" Regulus blinks a couple of times. "Yes, of course, he's my friend—"

"Just that? Just your friend?"

"Why, Potter? Are you jealous?"

"Reg—"

"Yeah, James," Regulus sighs, probably sounding more pleased than he should. "He's just a friend."

"Good. Good."

"You know, this talk isn't really turning me on."

James chuckles softly, and Regulus' cheeks hurt from how big he's smiling.

"Aw, man, really?" he whines, almost making Regulus laugh. "That's such a shame. I've been half-hard since we started talking."

"James!" Regulus scolds him, but it probably doesn't have the desired effect, considering his grin is basically audible.

"I'm serious!" he laughs, and Regulus shakes his head, leaning back until his back touches the bed. "It's not my fault your cock is so fussy—"

"Don't have a cock," Regulus answers without thinking.

James falls silent, and Regulus is about to take it back, laugh it off or even hang up without an explanation, but then James is speaking up again.

"A cunt, then," James says, and he sounds okay, casual, even if a little stiff. "Is that—are you comfortable with that word, or...?"

"Yeah," Regulus tells him softly, almost in a sigh. "I don't really mind that much, I just—I didn't want you to think—"

"It's completely fine, love. Really. Doesn't make any difference to me. And I know I shouldn't have assumed—"

"You're fine, James," Regulus reassures him, endlessly endeared by this ridiculous man.

"I'm glad, because I genuinely want to do this," James says quietly, like it's a secret. A confession only meant for Regulus' ears.

"And what's 'this'? Phone sex?"

"That, and a date."

Regulus stops breating. "A date?"

"A date," James affirms. "More than one, hopefully, but I'm trying not to push my luck."

"Aren't you doing this a bit backwards? Considering you're already attempting to get in my pants."

"Maybe. But I'm very impatient, and I've been waiting for this a while, love."

Regulus goes silent, pretending to think it over. James' tension is palpable even through the phone, and he delights a little in making him squirm for once.

"Okay," he ends up saying, hoping his enthusiasm isn't too obvious.

"Okay?" James repeats dumbly.

"Okay, I'll go on a date with you."

"Shit, really?" James sounds so excited it drags a giggle out of Regulus. "That's—fucking amazing, we're gonna have so much fun, Reg—"

"And about that phone sex," he goes on, casting a glance at his closed door, "you can call me again tonight, and then we'll see.

James' breath hitches on the other side of the line, and Regulus presses his legs even closer together. He hasn't felt this giddy in quite a long time.

Horny, too, but he thinks the wait will be more than worth it.

"Yeah?" James exhales.

"Yeah."

Regulus is already counting down the minutes.

[wileys-russo]

childhood sweethearts (1) II a.russo x reader

series playlist

this is part one to a lil multi part fic i've been working on, sequels and prequels to come

childhood sweethearts II a.russo x reader

"and you promise you'll not burn yourself out again right darling?" you sighed at the obvious concern present in your mums voice on the other end of the phone line. "yes mother i've learnt and i've grown and i'm doing all the self care things!" you cheered sarcastically, switching to hands free as you moved to stir your dinner.

"ha ha ha. i think you forget that i still know where you live and i have no issues just popping in every now and then to check on-" the older woman began to threaten as your eyes widenened.

"okay okay there's no need for that mum! i'm doing well, i promise." you responded a lot more sincerely as the woman on the other end simply hummed. "this school and my workload is a lot less intense, really! my colleagues are very friendly, my boss is approachable and i love my class. better?" you sighed as you switched off your stove and began to dish yourself up a bowl.

"and it's brought you back closer to home, my favourite part!" your mum cheered as you playfully rolled your eyes.

"yes it has however i maintain that i have boundaries mum. you, lily and harry are only welcome to visit with an invitation." you warned, half serious and half joking as you grabbed your phone and moved to the living room, sinking down into the sofa.

"yes you made that very clear, feeling very loved darling." "you know i love you ever so dearly mum but i also love my own space."

"oh god i almost forgot. you'll never guess who i ran into the other day!" your mum suddenly gasped making you chuckle, if you'd even tried guessing you could have been stuck on the phone with her for hours, your mothers social circle seemingly never ending.

it used to be a point of contention for you in your youth, hating the way you were seemingly forever pulled away to dinners or parties or barbeques, having to beg your parents to leave once it grew late in the night and your social battery had long hit its max.

as your siblings grew older they were always excused from going to these elaborate social events and you'd beg to be given that same privilege but as the youngest that was one thing you coudn't talk your way out of.

though once your dad passed you watched that break her down to nothing, seemingly just a shell of the woman she once was when he was alive and all was well.

but with time you grew to watch your mother pick herself back up slowly and start to rebuild her own support net. recconecting with her inner circle after isolating herself from the outside world for so long, it warmed your heart and was something you would forever encourage for her.

knowing that the older woman would always thrive and be at her best as a social butterfly and the hostess with the mostess, it had helped her to heal.

"if i guessed we could be here for hours and i have an island full of gorgeous single airheads and a bowl of pasta calling my name, so who did you run into?" you chuckled, shoveling in a mouthful of food as you awaited her answer.

"carol russo!" you choked at her words, spitting out the pasta you'd half chewed and breaking out into a coughing fit, scrambling for the glass of water on the coffee table.

"oh honestly i wish you'd learn to chew before you swallow, the food isn't going to disappear!" your mum scolded you as you finally caught your breath again.

"oh i'm grand mum, thank you for your concern!"

"anyway. well i've not seen her for years as you'd know and then there i was just browsing the strawberries, i needed some for a new crumble recipe i'm trying, and there she was, just grabbing a bunch of carrots!" you had to withhhold the urge to laugh at the way your mother told stories and just how animated she'd become, so fixated on the small details as she basically told you their entire conversation and coincidentally revealed her entire shopping list as she went.

"so we're all going out for a meal on thursday to catch up properly." you hummed, only half listening at this point. "that sounds nice." you mumbled, flicking through the tv.

"so you'll be there then? i said half past six since i know you're normally home from work around five." now that had you tuning back in. "wait, you what?" you directed your full attention back to the conversation.

"dinner with the russo's. half past six at paradiso, your brother and sister already said yes." your mum repeated as your stomach dropped and you fell silent. "darling did you hear me?"

"yeah i did. but look mum i have lesson planning to do and that's a school night and-" "oh y/n please! carol made such a point to ask how you've been and how much she'd love to see you. i know you and lessi drifted apart but you're both adults now darling i'm sure you can find some common ground, and the two of you used to be inseparable."

and there it was.

you could have just maybe deluded yourself into thinking that there was a slight chance the youngest russo wouldn't be present, perhaps you'd get lucky and she would be too busy off being a european football superstar.

but now you knew she'd be there the pit of worry and dread forming in your stomach only widened, quickly going from a small hole to a gaping chasm as the nerves already settled in at the thought of speaking with her after so many years apart.

"actually no you know what darling i don't care if you're an adult now, you're going. no arguments!" your mum decided, hastily excusing herself and stating she couldn't wait to see you, ending the call before you could utter another word.

~

"oh god, get it together! they're just regular people and its just one dinner." you mumbled to yourself with a shake of your head as you fixed your hair in your rear view mirror for the fifth time, sinking into your seat with a long exhale.

you jumped and let out a yell of shock as someones knuckles rapped against your window, an all too familiar toothy grin shining down at you as you grabbed your bag and popped open your door.

"shortstack!" giorgio cheered, surprising you as he scooped you up into a bearhug. "well, maybe not so much anymore." he placed you back down as he looked you up and down with a beaming smile.

"hi gio." you laughed fondly, hugging him again as he squeezed you, having been just like another brother to you as you'd grown up, it seemed he hadn't changed a bit.

"still shorter than me though, and definitely shorter than lessi." the boy teased as you felt a wave of nausea wash over you as the realization once again sank in you'd be seeing her again after all these years.

"so its been years, how have you been?" the italian laughed, throwing an arm over your shoulder as you briefly caught him up on what you were doing now as he did the same, the two of you wandering into the familiar restaurant.

"hasn't changed eh?" he chuckled as the both of you looked around, fondly recalling memories of all the dinners your combined families would have here throughout your childhood, the same owners still preserving its legacy and charm years and years later.

"hey, i was really sorry to learn about your dad. he was a good man, one of the best." the boy gently grabbed your arm and tugged you to the side a little, genuine sorrow in his eyes at the words as your lips pressed together and you nodded.

pity, you hated pity.

"thanks gio." you squeezed his shoulder with a small smile as the two of you resumed your chatter and you spotted the rest of your families already gathered together at a large table up the back, the same table you'd always sat at.

it seemed the two of you were the last to arrive as cheers erupted and you both made your rounds saying hello, without even needing to look to your right you could feel a certain blondes eyes burning holes in the side of your head, but you weren't quite ready to accept that just yet.

"sweetheart look at you! absolutely beautiful." carol beamed, pulling you into a very tight hug after you'd finished once again being lifted into the air both by mario and luca, seemingly an italian tradition as thats how it had always been for you with the men of the russo household.

"its so lovely to see you again carol, mum was delighted to have bumped into you, i know she's missed you since it all happened." you admitted softly, the older woman nodding in understanding and rubbing your back comfortingly.

though the gesture was not anything new it did send your heart racing, as you knew another russo who was fond of that exact same thing and at the seemingly simply action a million memories came crashing down onto you and your knees buckled slightly.

doing your best to shake them off you greeted your own siblings and mum, and then without anyone else to use as a buffer you found yourself having to take a seat, and of course the only seat free would be next to her.

your stomach dropped as finally you had no choice but to look at her, the girl thankfully caught up in conversation with your sister sitting across from her you found her eyes no longer gazed back at you.

it presented you with a small fleeting moment to actually take her in.

long gone was the grubby ten year old brunette who would tackle you to the ground and sit on you to paint your face with mud after she'd spent the afternoon kicking footballs at your head, now sat before you was a woman.

you knew she'd forgone her natural hair colour for the bottle blonde, in fact you'd been the very first person she told the moment she even started to consider it. you'd gone with her to the salon for her appointment, showering her with praise at her new cut and colour which she'd clearly stuck with over the years.

gone was the baby fat which once rounded out her face, her features though still soft had become more defined over time, and you couldn't help but allow your eyes the luxury of roaming her incredibly toned arms which sat on full display, likely attributed to the hours she dedicated to training every day.

she had always been strong physically, easily able to overpower you during countless wrestling matches in your early youth, or pinning you down on her bed to steal the breath from your very lungs with a searing kiss in your teenage years, forever teasing you to no end at all the ways she bettered you in strength.

sat with one leg crossed over the other you marvelled at the tight fitting dress which adorned the curvature of her body, another thing that grubby ten year old alessia would have scoffed at, forever foregoing fancy dress ups and heels for football boots and a tattered hand me down manchester united jersey.

of course over the years you'd grown up together there was changes within you both, the biggest of everything being the fact you realized you loved one another in a way best friends shouldn't, thinking about one another the way the rest of your friends spoke about liking boys.

it was how the two of you had wound up being one anothers first everything, though that was a secret reserved only for the two of you to share, and one that would take much more time than a quick dinner for you to really unpack.

so swallowing down the hard lump in your throat at the cascading emotions washing over you, you screamed at your legs to move and cleared the distance between you and her, your sisters eyes flickering toward you alerting alessia the chair beside her would no longer be vacant.

sneaking a glance up toward you she had to stop herself from gasping. much like your own observations, to alessia gone was the shy smiley ten year old she'd chased around her backyard every afternoon and sat giggling for hours with tucked away in pillow forts on rainy days, replaced instead with a well spoken and quite frankly drop dead gorgeous woman looking to her expectantly.

alessia quickly stood to her feet, wincing at the obnoxious scrape of her chair against the hard wood floor, the two of you sizing one another up clearly unsure how to proceed.

"hi." you started softly, alessia swooning at the dimples which hadn't left you over the years, your nose still scrunching slightly as it always had when you smiled.

"hey." the striker managed to force out with her own nervous smile, the two of you hesitating for a moment, clearly both ticking over if a hug was the next most appropriate step.

though right as alessia began to move closer, arms ready to envelop your shorter form, it seemed the decision had been made for both of you as servers arrived.

handing out menus and starting to take drink orders meant the two of you dropped down into your seats, refusing to look one another in the eye as you spoke to everyone and anyone but each other.

alessia ordering a glass of white wine with a grateful smile her ears perked up and a slight frown appeared on her face as you murmured to the man you were content to stick with water.

"let me guess, no drinking on a school night?" your older sister lily had mocked with a teasing grin as you rolled your eyes at her over the lip of your glass.

"oh yes your mum was telling me you're teaching now! and you've just gotten back from working abroad?" carol tuned in at that point, seated beside your sister as you nodded.

"yeah i was in australia for two years teaching, i actually only got back a few weeks ago and started a position here in a local school." you confirmed with a smile, alessia glancing toward you with a look of surprise at the new information.

“oh that’s just wonderful, I can see you’d be the most amazing teacher. what age?” carol complimented sincerely as you sent her a grateful smile, you’d definitely found the right work for you and you adored your job so you always appreciated when it was picked up on by others.

“I was teaching grade five in australia but my class here now are only second years which is a bit of a change.” you answered with a chuckle, it had definitely been an adjustment but you honestly preferred it to how things had been overseas.

"got over your fear of planes then if you made it in one piece to australia?" luca chimed in with a wink as you waved him off, having always had a paraylsing fear of aircraft it had taken a lot for you to board that final plane away from everything you knew.

but with a new adventure awaiting and having done about as much preparation as one girl could do, once you were in the air it relieved you to know it actually wasn't all that bad.

"lessi just got back from australia, well we all did actually what a place it is. and what a shame we didn't know you were living there at the time!" mario added with a regretful smile before returning to his conversation with your brother.

"yes i was sorry to see how that ended for you lessi, you played brilliantly though! lil and i watched most of the games, footy for breakfast." your mum beamed, alessia unable to not share a grin with the woman, her happiness always having been infectious just as yours was, it wasn't hard to see where you got it from.

"y/n was at the semi finals too, in person." your brother harry chimed in as your face paled, having hoped this wouldn't come up as you felt ocean blue eyes pierce into the side of your head. "you were?" alessia's voice was soft and laced with surprise, and you were sure you were the only one who had heard her as you nodded.

"our school was given a handful of tickets by one of the parents who sits on the FA board, so i went with a few other teachers. the only english woman among a huddle of australians i wasn't the most popular on the train ride home or at work that next day!" you joked, cheeks flushed slightly red at all the eyes on you, grateful once the conversation seemed to shift to another topic.

but alessia wasn't quite finished with it yet.

"i wish i'd known you were there." the blonde admitted quietly, sparing a glance toward you as you stiffened. "you scored the winner, i didn't miss that." you replied softly, messing about with your fingers and staring down at the table as alessia's wine arrived.

she downed it in one go, tapping the server and murmuring for another as he nodded and took her glass away, the blondes head buzzing with the much needed liquid confidence.

"did your friends need to explain the rules to you?" alessia smiled, her tone now much lighter as you shared a look, own lips curling upwards at what she was insinuating.

"mostly just how offside works and what the hell VAR was." you joked, seemingly relaxing a little more in your chair as alessia did the same. "i see your ever growing passion for football hasn't changed then." the older girl teased sarcastically, ring clad fingers drumming against the table.

despite it being her one true love you couldn't have cared less about the sport, the only reason you feigned any interest was not to upset her or have her feel unsupported, and so you allowed her to teach you the rules of the sport so you would appreciate every game you sat at to watch her play, and you hardly ever missed a single one.

though that also never ever stopped her from forcing you to stand between the posts as she and her brothers fired shot after shot at you.

you’d often run off after a few minutes of being hammered and your best friend would chase you down, dragging you back to the goal and demanding you try to stop at least one of her shots and she would switch with you and let you kick at her instead.

it was safe to say you never did manage to get a turn at playing striker.

"could say the same for you, champion of europe now isn't it? bit of a step up from winner of the backyard round robins one on one with your brothers." your shoulder nudged into hers slightly, setting alessias entire body on fire just from the marginal contact, something she'd not felt in years.

"seems we have a lot to catch up on then." alessia smiled, your stomach erupting into butterflies at the slight rasp of her voice, scolding yourself for such feelings as you settled again.

"well six years is quite a long time."

~

though alessia was hyper aware of all of the physical changes within you, it warmed her to see there were still some things which stuck around all the same over the time you'd spent apart.

"some things don't change do they." the blonde murmured with an amused smile seeing you pick out every single tomato from your side salad, subtly moving them to an awaiting napkin as you blushed having been caught out.

growing up you’d always do the same, normally not much of a picky eater but what you didn’t like you didn’t like. thankfully for you though the blonde beside you ate like a hoover growing up with how much physical energy she exerted daily, especially in her early teen years. and would always take whatever you didn’t want, making sure her mum never noticed as you were determined not to have her think you didn’t like anything she prepared for you.

"here." alessia chuckled, reaching out to grab the small handful of tomato’s you'd collected and depositing them on her own plate, in turn dropping a few of her roast potatos onto your own in a silent exchange, shutting down your protests with a firm look.

"thanks." you smiled gratefully, conversation turning toward alessia now as everyone picked at their food. "so arsenal then less? big shift from you as a die hard united fan." your brother joked though knowing the girl as you did you didn't miss the way a small frown of discomfort flickered across her face.

but as soon as it was there it had disappeared again and she was chattering away about how happy she was with her new club, and admittedly you tuned out a little bit as your mind wandered to your lesson planning for tomorrow.

"hm?" you hummed as you heard your name, shooting back down to earth and rejoining the conversation. "head in the clouds still sweetheart!" carol teased as you laughed nervously, apologizing for your lack of focus and asking your mum to repeat herself.

"we were just saying that lessi's new place is quite close to yours." the older woman smiled with a look in her eye you didn’t like, sipping at her wine as you forced a smile. "oh is it? thats nice." you nodded, looking anywhere than at alessia who you knew was waiting for you to say something more.

though when you didn't the conversation turned once again and you exhaled slightly, however of course the conversation had shifted to what you and alessia were like as children, your mums swapping story after story which frankly sent your head into a spin.

you abruptly stood, excusing yourself to go to the bathroom as you started to feel a little overwhelmed, alessia's eyes following yours with a concerned frown. "go make sure she's okay lessi." her mum ordered, shooting down her protests with a stern look and shooing her away as the blonde sighed and got to her feet, following after you.

she hesitated on the handle for the bathroom, she was almost certain she'd had a hand in why you left the table in the first place so would her coming to check in on you even really help anything?

she mulled it over for a moment, hand still on the handle before she shook her head, deciding against it and taking a step away. though no sooner had she made up her mind was it changed for her as the door opened and you'd come striding out, smacking into the blonde whose hands grabbed at you.

though with her notoriously clumsy nature she found her footing slipped and she was sent tumbling to the floor, accidentally taking you down with her as your bum smacked against the concrete with a wince.

"fuck, i'm so sorry." alessia blurted out as her face burnt red in embarrassment, hurrying to her feet and offering you a hand up. "it's fine." you smiled politely, the blonde frowning at just how quickly you dropped her hand once you were back on your feet, attempting to step around her to return to the table.

"wait." her strong hands landed on your hips, spinning you around as your eyes widened and alessia realized her mistake, hastily snatching away her hands and stepping back, mumbling an apology.

"you said to wait?" you reminded, eyebrow raised clearly giving her the opportunity to say whatever she had intended. "oh. can we get a coffee sometime? to catch up." alessia forced out, grateful for the few glasses of wine in her system that allowed her to swallow the nerves which threatened to drown her.

"alessia-" you started and the striker could tell right away from your tone and furrowed eyebrows that you were angling for a no. she had to swallow her wounded pride at the realisation you were also the only one at the entire table who'd not called her a single nickname all night, and if she was honest you were really the only one who she wanted to.

"please." the blonde almost begged, her hand reaching out for yours again but pausing midway as you ever so slightly retreated, fingers falling dejectedly back to her side as you sighed.

"alessia i really don't know if-"

"we were best friends for a lot longer than anything else went on. i want to hear about what you've been up to, properly. not just a few awkward sentences at a dinner you clearly don't even want to be at."

you hated her for how well she knew you and could clearly still read you like a book, despite the length of time it had been since she'd even seen picked up and glanced at the cover.

"i've missed you."

and there it was, the three word confession seemingly innocent however it was enough to drive a metal spike right through your insides, and had you wishing you could curl into a ball and be swallowed up by the floor right about now.

"please? it would just be two old friends getting a coffee, catching each other up about the last six years of their lives. completely normal!" alessia tried again this time with a joking smile, desperately trying to ease the fast mounting tension arising between the two of you.

you had to respect her efforts, the taller girl rocking back and forth on the balls of her feet nervously, hands rubbing at the material of her dress desperate to try and wipe them dry, her skin soft and clammy at the sight of you in front of her again after so long.

"okay."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

part two

[weebsinstash]

I wanna be best buds with Lucifer. All my brain cells r now fixated on the short munchkin dressed like a haunted puppet with depression who CLEARLY needs a new passion project in his life.

Depressed Dad is clearly in need of something or someONE to kick him out of his depression funk. Y/N could be just the ESA he needs. The hell equivalent of those little marimo moss balls parents buy for kids who are too irresponsible to remember to feed fish.

What I'm saying is, the platonic yandere potential is off the charts. We go to Valentino to get hungover and fucked, but we go to Luci for a hangover cure and a comfy couch to crash on.

Honestly I was thinking of something, like

Lucifer just wants to assume everyone down there is the worst, but imagine he comes to the Hotel to see Charlie and Reader is there as a guest and, SOMETHING happens

Like I was imagining it would be really cute if Lucifer's first visit to the Hotel went significantly worse and Charlie and him are arguing and Reader is the one who tries to help them make amends. Constantly fighting the feminine urge to put musicals in these fucking fics or posts but you wind up singing a tune about how WAIT, please don't go, the two of them have to make up, and clearly he's a good person and an even better dad because CHARLIE is like rhe nicest sweetest bestest person you've ever met

and then after you're done Charlie is like BAWLING like when Angel forgave her, just grabbing you and her Dad, "this is the first time they've saaaaang, they've been too shy and they did it for US, that's so beautiful!!!" just like HARD CRYING and you're basically like Honorary Child 2 at that point

I can just. mmm, imagine if you knew Val first and then befriended the Morningstars. Valentino tries to force you to do something one day and you're just like, picking up your phone, staring Val dead in the face as you text someone. FIVE MINUTES LATER, there's a knock to the door of the set, and you rush to open it, and everyone starts losing their fucking MIIIINDS as LUCIFER HIMSELF walks in

You give Valentino a grin that would have made a demon proud as if to say "fucking try me bitch" before turning back to Lucifer, "heeeeeey short king! I'm sorry for messaging out of the blue but I missed you! Hey, i think my friend Mr Valentino was about to like, give me a job or something?"

Lucifer's just all, "oh, you mean like working the lights or, helping mop the floors cause, I don't think that suits a young lady/man/whatever like yourself!"

Like can you imagine Val was having you read some AWFUL like NAAAAASTY script before Luci came in and it's still in his hand and you point at it, "hey isn't that it right there?" And Valentino and potentially even Vox have to SCRAMBLE, "No no not at all, this is, uh, my laundromat receipt!" *shoves the entire booklet into a nearby shark demon's mouth

Lucifer is standing there being, kinda judgy like he was with Charlie's hotel but otherwise being friendly and YOURE the one being the "silent" menace. Valentino is GRINDING his teeth, "soooo, Mr Morningstar, sir, big fan, excellent work, uh, what can we do for you?" And you're just slinging an arm around THE DEVIL "oh, me and him were gonna go grab lunch and I was maybe gonna crash at his daughter's new place where Mr Lucifer here is gonna be visiting all the time. You don't mind right?" and Vox has to step in and answer "yeah, sure no problem!!!" because Valentino is about to devolve into nothing but furious squeaking

This is an idea I'm prolly gonna wind up using for a platonic Husker thing but, Reader having an abusive childhood and Lucifer becomes aware that YOUR dad was a mean piece of shit, definitely down in Hell too or previously exterminated, and Lucifer just finds you like DRUNK IN THE GUTTER, "I'm a looooooser just like my dad". Like. Yandad Luci here is probably the type where he sees you having ONE bad hangover and he's concrete convinced you're a hardcore alcoholic and need rehab STAT. Which may be true but what I'm saying is is that, he sees you at your weakest ONCE and he's suddenly like "Oh no, duckling! cmon, let, uh, let ... Daaaaaad help you? 🥺" and you find out his idea of help is like. Extremely well intentioned but horribly well executed as he's over here, "you know what helps MY depression? Inventing things in my workshop" and you look around to 4000 versions of the same rubber duck and you're like "s so.... is it working" and he just emphatically declares "No! :D but I think it's getting a little better with you here!" and your fate is fucking sealed and wait until Lilith moseys on back into town and finds the "savior" of her goofy little husband and best bud of her daughter and now you've got every Morningstar on your side in totally The Most Normal Ways Possible :)

[gayofthefae]

They've said they want their show rewatchable. As someone who wasn't like SUPER invested in the ships/show before, the most rewatchable thing they can do is Mike's queerness.

I would not have rewatched it until season 5 came out. Maybe once before then if I got bored, but definitely not as much as I have without it. And the plots for Will have been too supernatural focused (also a good rewatch point after season 5 comes out, I'm sure) to be worth rewatching for his queer personal plot for two seasons before we even really get to it too much.

But Mike? Everything Mike does is impacted by his queerness. Will? Obviously. El? Most DEFINITELY. The Supernatural? You mean the thing that only ever affects Will and El? Yup.

Do you know my first thought, as someone not yet obsessed, when it started to become more clear that Mike was queer? "Oh, that's more interesting"

The average person isn't gonna drop the show because their ship broke up amicably. But they are going to if they get bored.

Mike having been queer the entire time, who cares if planned, as long as it isn't contradicted by anything prior (which is not possible because queerness is not disprovable) just gives a whole new view to everything he's ever done, making it less straightforward than you thought it was, changing your original view of the events, making you want to rewatch just to see how each moment is impact.

Making it more INTERESTING.

It's simple, honestly. Speaking as someone who passively thought the couples were cute and generally wanted the characters to be happy but wasn't deeply attached or fixating on any part of the show, Mike being queer is just more interesting than him being straight. That's all the people really want.

They've already gotten lots more residuals from this. And I'm sure they know that at least half of it isn't just because of the vol 2 lore drop. And it isn't because of what we think is gonna happen for Will in season 5 either, why watch seasons where it also hasn't happened yet. It's because of something else, much like the lore, that affects every facet of an entire plotline from the first episode. Not even the lore actually does that, it's just interesting to know, but that one's easier to connect back in your memory, but isn't as deeply rooted that you need to think through every singular behavior of the mind flayer. But with Mike, we know it affects it, but we immediately had to know how.

I probably would have rewatched it once by now. Maybe one more time a year from now to prepare for the season 5 release, but maybe not. I didn't do my rewatch before season 4's release, so I might not have. But instead, because of Mike and Mike only, I'm currently on my third watch since 2022. Maybe fourth, I'm not sure. Not just because of a ship I wanna see again because they're cute. Because I'm LEARNING something new every time I see his face on my screen. Not because I ship it, not even because I personally want it to be true for any character's sake.

But because Mike being queer is just. more. interesting.

[seokjinsonlyone]

in which you want to kiss jungkook's cheek...

[10:28pm] yn: you look handsome :p

you tossed your phone away as soon as you sent the message. you were used to thinking these thoughts not verbalizing them. but you know you appreciate it when he tells you that you look good, so it’s only right to reciprocate. your phone buzzed back almost immediately which you weren’t expecting.

[10:29pm] jk 🤪💜: thank yooouuuu

[10:29pm] jk 🤪💜: wyd

[10:31pm] yn: in bed

[10:31pm] yn: on my phone

[10:31pm] yn: looking at this and that

[10:33pm] jk 🤪💜: you should come over

you were literally looking at videos of him at the calvin klein launch party which was what prompted your message in the first place.

[10:34pm] yn: ??????

[10:34pm] yn: aren't u at a party

[10:35pm] jk 🤪💜: i was

[10:35pm] yn: ??????

[10:35pm] jk 🤪💜: i left

you furrowed your brows going back to check the time stamp on the video you just watched, but lo and behold there was a new video posted from five minutes ago and it was of him leaving. your brain short circuited at the clip of him walking past the camera to get back into his car. his cheek looked ripe enough to pick. you wanted to kiss it so bad

[10:38pm] yn: dang that was quick how long were you there

[10:39pm] jk 🤪💜: like 30 minutes

[10:39pm] yn: 😭😭😭

[10:39pm] yn: ur literally a brand ambassador don't u get paid to go to those things

[10:40pm] jk 🤪💜: LOL i get paid to APPEAR so i appeared and then disappeared

[10:40pm] jk 🤪💜: i don't like going to those things by myself i would've stayed if i could bring u with me

you jutted your lip out, heart softening as butterflies began fluttering in your tummy. you have no idea what you would do at a function like that even if you could show up with him. it was as much your scene as it was his, but if he needed the support you'd 100% step up.

[10:42pm] jk 🤪💜: so are you coming over???

[10:43pm] yn: it's kinda late ain't it

[10:43pm] jk 🤪💜: you could stay the night????

you bit your lip. your relationship was all of a week old and he already wanted you to spend the night? you didn't know what to say. it wasn't like you didn't want to. like, it sounded really good in theory, it's just... weren't you skipping a couple steps?

[10:46pm] yn: that's kind of fast, isn't it?

you sat waiting for his response, noticing the text bubbles come and go several times.

[10:50pm] jk 🤪💜: i mean if you don't want to that's fine but i think we should just do whatever feels right for us without thinking about other people.

your heart picked up its pace at his statement brain fixating on the word 'us'. you and him. he was right. that was all that mattered in your relationship. if he wanted you to come and you wanted to go then why not?

[10:52pm] yn: oh. yeah okay. i'll come

[10:52pm] jk 🤪💜: i'm not trying to pressure you !

[10:52pm] jk 🤪💜: you really don't have to come if that's too soon for you it won't hurt my feelings

[10:53pm] yn: no i want to! just let me throw a bag together and i'll be on my way!!!

you hurried, grabbing whatever laundry was at the top of your pile and haphazardly stuffing it in your backpack while putting all of your toiletries into your tote bag. you contemplate changing into an outfit but then shake your head. it was eleven o clock at night and you already told him you were in bed, he should be expecting the worse.

thirty minutes later and you were standing outside of jungkook's door, biting the inside of your cheek, as you rocked from heel to toe waiting for him to open the door. and dear god you must've saved a group of orphans from a burning building in a past life because being able to see jeon jungkook in the flesh, hair half up half down, bangs spread across his forehead, bunny smile blossoming on his lips was certainly some kind of blessing.

he grabbed your bags from you and set them down near the couch before pulling you into a hug, one arm wrapped around your hips the other around your shoulder, your face completely smushed into his chest which was deliciously firm and required every ounce of self restraint not to sink your teeth into his pecs.

"missed you," he said, pulling back to get a good look at you. there was a small section in your brain that wanted to feel self conscious but you couldn't find it in you to care all that much when he was rubbing small circles into your back. he made you feel too good.

"you saw me two days ago," you deflected.

"still missed you tho. wanna see you everyday."

you shook your head, toying with the hem of his shirt. he was still all dressed up. "how long have you been home?"

"maybe 15-20 minutes."

"why you still in your party clothes then?"

"you told me i looked handsome, so i wanted you to see me in person."

you breathed out a laugh and looked up at him again, letting go of his shirt, hesitating briefly before reaching out and twirling his hair in your hands and tucking that one loose strand behind his ear. "you are handsome and very very pretty."

"pretty?" he asked giggling.

you nodded resolutely, absolutely taken by the way his nose scrunched up as he laughed, cheeks puffed out reminding you of how badly you wanted to kiss them. you weren't sure how to go about it tho. like, you could just go for it. that was your boyfriend. cheek kisses were definitely on the table, but you just hadn't gotten used to wanting. you were always the one that gave yourself up to those who wanted you simply because they would have you but you don't think you've ever wanted someone back. so this feeling of actually being invested in a relationship was new.

he knocked his nose against yours. "you're prettier."

and you knew he was messing with you. could tell he was waiting on you to make the first move by the way he lingered, his breath intermingling with yours. but you just couldn't push yourself to do it. it felt like an invisible force was holding you back.

he backed up from you. "okay. i'm gonna go change now. you can find something to watch if you want."

you nodded mildly disappointed. the hug was really nice. much appreciated, but it had been two days. you wanted a little more. you groaned internally. you were just gonna have to go for it. "wait!" you called out when he was halfway down the hall, moving to catch up with him. "is it okay if- can i- can i-" you fumbled over your words before deciding to abandon them altogether, raising up on your tip toes to finally press your lips to his cheek.

you could feel yourself flush all over, heat sneaking up on every possible surface of your skin. ugh, why was showing affection so embarrassing?

jungkook cackled at the way you couldn't even look him in the eyes. "you're so freaking cute."

and next thing you know you were being pushed onto the wall, jungkook pressed against you at every possible point of contact as he kissed you hot and heavy. his tongue licking into your mouth at a salacious pace, swallowing all the little sounds you couldn't help but make for him, hands squeezing where they gripped your hips. you were honestly dizzy at the turn around, barely able to keep pace with the ferocity with which he came at you with.

he could sense it too, slowing down the kiss until he was pressing small pecks against your lips. you were so glad you were backed into the wall because you don't think you'd be able to stand otherwise. you'd kissed a few times before, but never like that. he breathed out a laugh. "i wanted to do that so bad."

"then why didn't you?" you asked, smoothing your hands over his chest.

"because you kept staring at my lips and i wanted to see how long it was gonna take you to break."

there he goes giggling again like he isn't a little demon seed. you scowled at him. "i was staring at your cheek actually." you pressed another kiss to it. and one to the mole that was on his chin because you had a minor obsession with it. and a final one back on his lips just because you could and you were starting to miss the feeling of them against you.

"alright i'm actually gonna change now. we can do sheet masks together when i'm done." he stole one more kiss before pulling away and walking to his room.

"please come back fully clothed!" you called after him. you had no idea what other kind of stunts he had up his sleeve and your self restraint was severely drained. if you saw his abs right now, you don't know what you'd do.

"no promises!" he called back. you sighed. it was gonna be a long night.

a/n: if you saw me say i wanted to kiss jungkook's cheek no you didn't <333

[antianakin]

hey! just wanted to say that i'm so happy to meet a fellow reva lover!! she is absolutely one of the best parts of the show as a standalone character who also moves obi-wan along on his arc. i hardly hear anything about her when she deserves so much more hype :(

hot take but i love that her backstory is so...predictable in the best way. it makes total sense that there were youngling survivors, and of course they would have a deeply traumatic, emotional relationship towards darth vader and the empire he's helped to create if they knew what he was before that - the chaos from the annihilation of jedi culture, guidance, protection.

i'm not articulating well but it's amazing how it's absolutely the most straightforward thing to do: it shows that anakin and palpatine's actions have Consequences. the protagonist, the main villain, and reva are all still fixated on this thing that happened. to see it on the screen explicitly, with no excuses, just: look at what happened. take it in. wow.

for all the people in this fandom who love obi-wan and particularly ewan mcgregor's portrayal, i would expect this show to be remembered way more fondly than it currently is. it genuinely delivered everything i wanted: a close look at obi-wan's feelings, his relationship with anakin, his relationship with the jedi at large, and his strength through all that turmoil. i can understand minor complaints like "oh how'd they manage to hide leia in obi-wan's coat for so long" but the general vibe seems to be "that was a waste of time" and without throwing shade, it's perplexing. my current reasoning is that people wanted more nostalgia, less nostalgia, more excitement, or their understanding of the jedi (inevitably tied to obi-wan) conflicted to the point where the emotional tension + Theme just didn't hit. that's what seems most likely: if i didn't care for the Jedi and what they stand for, a whole season's worth of character study + rebuilding largely focused on the long-reaching consequences of order 66 might seem useless or just nostalgia-bait.

but luckily that is not me and i am a proud kenobi show is actually one of the best things that's come out of Disney SW believer. that line about jedi leaving a trail of compassion sold it for me - it's a spin-off done right, and it's ironic that i (a person who generally dislikes spin-offs/new media based on decades old material) go so hard for it but that's life!

Reva's incredible, and such an immensely underrated character. Reva is arguably the second most important character in the show after Obi-Wan himself, and in some ways, even more important than he is. Reva is the one who causes the story to move anywhere, her actions are the catalyst for almost every major plot point. There is NO STORY without her, none. The amount of pressure on Reva's shoulders to be parallels for both Obi-Wan and Anakin simultaneously, to be her own independent character with her own motives and journey, AND to carry the entire plot is absolutely insane. And somehow they managed it all and we ended up with one of the most interesting and satisfying characters in Star Wars as a result. I'd love to see more of her story post OWK, but I'd be VERY picky about who got to tell that story and really worried that it wouldn't be done well.

I'll be the first to admit that OWK isn't a perfect show. As you mentioned, there's some weird little choices they had to make in order to move the story forward that stretch suspension of disbelief a little. What I have found is that, if you WANT to enjoy the rest of the story enough and have enough other things in the story that you genuinely DO enjoy, it's really easy to ignore the smaller things that are kind-of silly or not done as well. I love Obi-Wan as a character, I really enjoyed the story they were telling for him in this show, and so I can ignore some of the issues that exist with it because they never took away from my enjoyment of the story being told.

I couldn't do that with, for example, the Ahsoka show. There are A LOT of people who could, though. There were absolutely people I saw who could recognize some of the weird issues with the show but enjoyed enough other parts of it and WANTED to enjoy the show enough that they were willing to set those things aside. But I personally didn't enjoy the story being told and I had enough other issues with the show that the smaller problems with it became bigger issues for me, they were just one more reason why the show felt like complete and utter garbage and contributed to my lack of enjoyment in the show. There were people doing the same with The Acolyte as well, I know.

So I must assume that the people who harp on smaller things like the silliness of Obi-Wan being able to hide Leia in his cloak for so long are just having a similar experience with OWK as I had with the Ahsoka show. They don't enjoy the story being told, they have issues with the characterization of Obi-Wan perhaps, the vibe of the show just isn't what they were expecting it to be perhaps, and so the little things become much bigger issues for them than it is for people like us who genuinely enjoyed the show for what it was.

I feel like one of the accusations I heard the most was that Obi-Wan didn't feel like he was in character, especially towards the beginning. All I can do is speculate here because I haven't actually had a conversation with anybody who felt this way, but my assumption about this is that they didn't care for the choice made to have Obi-Wan be more depressed at the beginning. I think people assumed a show about Obi-Wan would involve more of Obi-Wan being the way he was in the Prequels: a charming, suave action hero. I assume they expected more of Obi-Wan being a badass who never really struggles with anything. And so Obi-Wan refusing to fight, Obi-Wan being BAD at fighting for a while, Obi-Wan being a lot more bitter and defeatist, all felt really out of character and unsatisfying to people who were expecting his Prequels persona instead.

And, you know, I get it. I don't AGREE, but I get where this is coming from. Obi-Wan was one of the characters people liked the most from the Prequels, one of the few who managed to get out of that relatively unscathed. So I can understand how people who felt that way, especially those who aren't super fond of the Prequels, would feel very let down by OWK.

And I feel like that's the crux of it. OWK was trying REALLY REALLY HARD to feel like the Prequels. So many things that have come out since the Prequels have felt like they were ashamed of the Prequels and wanted to either rewrite it or ignore it, including things like TCW and Rebels. This is the first piece of media that has not only not felt ashamed of the Prequels being its source material but was actively CELEBRATING that source material by attempting to mimic it as best as it could. With that in mind, it's no wonder that OWK is allegedly one of the things that Lucas has enjoyed the most that's come out of Star Wars (presumably since he sold it). It's the first time his vision has been treated like a positive thing and not a skeleton in the closet.

But a lot of people hated the Prequels, they still do. So a show that actively feels like the Prequels and celebrates them isn't going to appeal to people who didn't like them in the first place. Which, you know, is understandable. The Acolyte was a show whose entire foundation was criticizing the Jedi for being arrogant, elitist blowhards who caused their own genocide, as well as trying to one-up The Last Jedi in the toxic romance department. None of these concepts appeal to me, I didn't like The Last Jedi and still don't, so a show based around that vibe is never going to feel enjoyable to me. Conversely, I have a lot of nostalgia for the Prequels and I genuinely do still enjoy them, so OWK was perfect for me in a way it wasn't for others.

As frustrating as the current landscape of Star Wars media can be right now, there is just enough variety to it that, to some degree, there's something for everyone. I didn't like Ahsoka or The Acolyte, but I really enjoyed OWK and Andor. I'm not into TOTJ, TOTE, or The Bad Batch, but I've loved everything to come out of Visions. There's a LOT of content out there now and not all of it is going to appeal to everyone, and that's honestly fine. I don't have to watch the shows that I know won't appeal to me, and I can stick with the content that I know DOES work for me, even if others don't like it.

[wormsin]

"Bruce’s protective control and Dick’s perfectionist caregiving are core dysfunctions for their characters" oh this is such a beautiful, and perfectly fitting, way of describing them that ive ever seen! and it's really interesting to note that, their dysfunctions are.. how do i say it, 'complement' the other's? giving a 'perfect' looping feedback?

like, bruce's protective control pushes dick's perfectionist self to work even harder--to achieve the impossible and essentially makes him more desperate to take care of bruce, and in return this pushes bruce's protectiveness to another whole new degree which then lead to his need to keep everything under his control become even worse. and that makes it harder for them to break from the cycle (am i making sense? i hope im making sense)

hold my beer, I'm using this as an excuse to write the Bruce & Dick enneagram meta in my head.

"He's so determined to prove he isn't like Master Bruce it scares me. In their own way they are so similar that I thank heaven for the differences." - Alfred Pennyworth Batman 1940 #438

I've mentioned before that I use enneagram typing to characterize Bruce and Dick. like all personality typing, it's unscientific bogus. (this one is sold as a business tool lol.) but i find the types compelling.

first of all, their types

Bruce is an 8, the challenger or protector. an 8's ego is attached to the idea of vengeance—destruction of self or others out of a sense of injustice. if the person has a huge ego, has a deluded perception of the world, it is tied to the idea of vengeance. their "holy idea" is truth, which is basically a core value and potential. their trap is justice, which they think is the right path, but it will actually keep them stuck in their bullshit.

[Dick calls Bruce out on going too far as he's breaking down after Jason's death. Batman 1940 #439]

an 8's deepest fear is being controlled, harmed, or violated. their base desire is to be influential, self sufficient and protect themself. their temptation is to think that they are self sufficient.

like, you see why I like this for Bruce.

Bruce saw his parents being murdered and his reaction to that trauma was to control himself and create a powerful alternate ego that gets vengeance on Gotham's criminals and protects the innocent.

[Bruce appealing to family court to take in Dick. Batman 1940 #439]

at his worst, Bruce is a control freak who doesn't let anyone help him and has a warped sense of justice. so much emotional armor.

[Bruce possessed by Antithesis and lashing out at Dick, which Dick correctly identifies as a fear reaction. Teen Titans Year One #3]

at his best, Bruce is a strong leader, is willing to do what is right even at personal cost, wants to protect and help others fairly, and strives to create a better world.

[Bruce creating a victims advocacy program. Batman 1940 #217]

tl;dr Bruce is driven by fear of loss and compensates by controlling his world and protecting himself and others.

Dick is a 2, the helper or giver. 2's ego fixation is flattery, pleasing and giving to others in order to be liked. their "holy idea" is freedom/will; there's several interpretations of this but for Dick I see it as wanting others and himself to be free of metaphorical shackles and to fly. the 2's trap is also freedom: from having personal needs and needing others.

2's fear is being unlovable and their base desire is to be loved unconditionally. their temptation is to deny their own needs and be manipulative.

[Dick hiding his sadness as he leaves Wayne Manor for college. Batman 1940 #217]

[Hugo Strange psychoanalyzing Dick's relationship to Bruce. Batman Gotham Knights #11]

Dick is constantly pushing himself to the limit to be the perfect hero and mentor, and wants to help others but doesn't accept help himself. he maintains an image of being the bringer of light. I think being raised as a performer made him associate doing well and making people happy with love and family; after losing his parents he searched for that unconditional love from Bruce, being a hero, and romantic partners.

at his worst, he's prideful, and both ignores his own needs and sacrifices himself for others in order to get those needs met.

[Dick killing himself to save people in nuclear-bombed Bludhaven and feeling good about it. Nightwing 996 #116]

at his best, he is compassionate, helpful, parental, and warms the hearts of others.

tl;dr Dick is driven by fear of not having love and family, and compensates by caring for others and being perfect.

[Dick having a nightmare during a month's long mental breakdown. Nightwing 1996 #117]

you are correct: Bruce and Dick's personalities complement each other at their best and worse.

at their worst, Bruce is emotionally withholding and pushes Dick away. this is out of need to protect himself; any emotional intimacy or love is a threat because what if they die? Dick interprets this as not being good enough for Bruce's praise or a place by his side, and tries to be better. no matter how far gone Bruce is, Dick has to be the exceptional one who stays and loves him. the fact that Dick always comes back to him and gets under his skin makes Bruce lash out or become more controlling. so the cycle continues!

"That's what eats away at you at night—not just that you're forever in his shadow—but that you love him. That you're the loyal son who has never been allowed to truly help—never permitted to save him from himself." - Hugo Strange, Batman Gotham Knights #10

at their best, Bruce uses his own traumatic experience and leadership to better Dick's life. Dick is a ray of light for him. their fears are eased in relation to each other, they both help others and improve their world.

[Alfred remembers Dick early in his Robin career. Batman 1940 #438]

I think they have a lot to learn from each other. but they can also be deeply stuck in this dysfunctional cycle because they can both hold onto their negative delusions.

"I love Bruce. He's my family. But I couldn't bring him out of the past... I was sacrificing my own future. I don't want that for you... Trust me, Tim. At some point... you have to set yourself free." - Dick, Batman Urban Legends #10. demonstrates a healthy Dick's relation to an unhealthy Bruce.