#ohhh maybe i should add the snippet????

[pangolin-404]

hey ...... the wip snippet . i know i already requested one but what if i did another. imagine

Ultrakill | The Kamen Rider Crossover Nobody Asked For <- this one :3

[ask game] :3 woag

ohhh hhough this one . skeleton in my closet that rattles at me menacingly from time to time. there is a high likelihood this one will either never see written completion in a way I see fit, or I will try to draw something for it, because this is one of those ideas that is just. lurking in the back of my brain always but it's never a full beginning-middle-end plot. I think it deserves to be Seen, Eventually

very very little is written in the actual doc and what is written is probably going to be deleted and rewritten. need to find a balance between worldbuilding and actual story because it's from Gabriel's POV and that has weird holier-than-thou bureaucracy. BUT the jist is:

the Council serves as a very powerful organization that carefully picks and chooses who can be a Kamen Rider. it is treated as a highly esteemed position, and Gabriel is expected to never leave his Rider form (though it can exhaust him because they're. not convenient in daily life,) and always be ready to get sent out to deal with crime or patrolling. his identity is stripped from him, and he is not considered a person beyond a Kamen Rider, a vigilante-ish figure who does what he's told without question, a weapon.

V1 and V2 are artificial Kamen Riders built to surpass the power of the Council. I haven't fully settled on who made them, likely human scientists (could add a healthy flavor of robot-war-is-threatening-to-happen in this setting here). V1 is an escapee that was meant to be scrapped because it could not be controlled, and springs around causing mayhem. V2 was either released to destroy V1, or escaped also, although for budding-self-awareness reasons and not kill-all-humans reasons. V2 here is a lot pettier than canon V2 because its predecessor is pretty openly running around and it has self-esteem issues because instead of being too murderous, it's not murderous enough.

Gabriel is sent to destroy the weird threat skittering around, attacking not just humans and Council staff ("angels" are just,, lower-leveled Riders I suppose) but machines that it SHOULD share a common goal with, but it does not care who gets in the way of its bullets. He doesn't realize V1 is a machine and has a crisis about that, and he didn't know V2 existed until it shot in from nowhere to attack V1. overall Gabriel is having a terrible time questioning what it means to be a Kamen Rider etc etc. he has his little gay awakening when V1 beats him in a fight

Mirage is canon. I don't know HOW Mirage would be canon. maybe a hologram or an evil V1 that just. ended up an existential young woman. but she is canon. vital information

I feel like I need to do more tinkering with the setting, what role the prime souls and the ferryman might play, and make a nice and tidy checklist for plotpoints . the kamen rider formula was not built for being written out. this has been in my brain for a year so someday it will be real or else I think I will be cursed

bonus year-old discord WIPs that may or may not be familiar (looking at these is killing me, ). the only reason I am showing these is because the files are now lost so if I ever had to touch the OG comic idea again I'd be doing it from scratch so these might as well see some glimmer of daylight

[andriahh]

Greywaren (2022)

[chaoxfix]

3 and 8 👀?

ty for the ask !!

3. sm 5 1

OHHH THIS this one is mostly done! im just gonna add a few more scenes. its sonic and mighty. its a half platonic half romantic shipfic, i just love how they care about each other in this very specific universe im working on lol. its almost 6K

heres a lil snippet:

“Wish you’d stop by more often, blue.” Sonic looks up from across the campfire. Tails is asleep, half in his lap, and Ray is in a similar position, leaned against Mighty. Neither Sonic or Mighty are willing to move – but neither really needs to. The night is quiet, aside from the crackling fire. And from this distance, Mighty gets to look at his old friend. “I want to,” Sonic says, and there’s an honesty in his voice that Mighty doesn’t doubt. “I just have a responsibility.” “What, and I don’t?” Mighty smiles, lopsided and fond. “I remember when freeing animals was the responsibility. Then you had to go and get yourself a real job-” “Oh, so now it’s a real job? It wasn’t last month.” “Last month Eggman’s threat was a big lobster,” Mighty says. “Not scary.” “You should have fought it then, I was wringing my quills out for a week after that.” Sonic glances down to Tails, and gently smoothes out his bangs. Hm, Mighty thinks. There’s a story there, somehow. “…It took ages. If Eggman ever makes another underwater base I might just quit, honestly.” Mighty chuckles and leans forward, resting his elbow on his knee and his chin in his hand. He smiles despite his griping, and looks at the way Sonic’s form is bent by the heat from this vantage point. “What are you looking at?” Sonic asks. Looking a little less relaxed than before. “You’re getting old,” Mighty says.

8: sf battery amy

ohhh this one this one is hard to write but ive written so much for it. its at 7.7K i have no idea where im going. but heres a snippet!

“Do you have any idea how hard this is to watch?” 

“Yeah, I know. I’m sorry. But right now I can’t, Amy. I just can’t.” 

“Can’t what?” she asks, expression genuinely hurt. “Just tell me, please. If you just tell me what’s wrong, I might be able to help-”

Sonic flinches. Amy isn’t sure what part of her tone is making him so skittish. She just wants to show that she cares. She tries not to take it to heart – she knows he’s been like this with everyone. But with her in particular, he’s been so much worse. 

“I can’t.” He says it flippantly – but he’s fidgeting. Fingertips tapping against his thighs like he needs to get out of there right this minute. 

But he hasn’t run yet. So Amy digs her heels in. 

“Yes, you can! We’re your friends, we aren’t going to hurt you. I’m not going to hurt you,” she says. “All we want is for you to feel like yourself again, because you clearly don’t-!” 

“I do.” 

“Look me in the eye and tell me that again,” she says, getting fired up despite herself. 

Sonic stands up straighter and looks her in the eye. “I. Do.” But he quickly looks away, cheeks hot with anger – or maybe shame. She can’t tell and she can’t take it. He rubs the back of his neck, ears flicking to the side. “...Now drop it, Amy. I know talking about feelings is your thing, but it’s never been mine. All I want is to finish thrashing robots for the day.”

“Knuckles already finished. It’s getting dark, and you need a good night’s sleep before going back out there.” 

“You guys are way too comfortable giving me orders,” Sonic mutters. “Thanks but no thanks. If I feel like smashing bots, I’m going to go out and smash bots.”

[littlejeanniebean]

Ohhh! an angsty snippet with Marichat would do my day. 😚😍💖

@constancezin!!! love this request!!! i’m sorry it took forever i had the angst down last night but i wanted to add adequate comfort and then i went overboard and now i might have to make it a series???

“... and sometimes I feel like… like… if something were to happen to me… as Chat Noir… sometimes I think he’d be more mad than… than anything else...” the blonde boy turned away, tears threatening to spill out of his dark green eyes. He shouldn’t be telling all this to a civilian, revealing his weakness. But he knew her, didn’t he? He knew Marinette.

For her part, the girl knew all too well that just because her parents doted on her, didn’t mean that all parents felt the same way and her heart ached for him. “I’d care, all of Paris would care, but nothing’s going to happen to you, right? Because you’re going to stop patrolling without your Lady’s help -”

The boy scoffed, “She’s not my Lady.”

“Wha-What do you mean?” Marinette shifted nervously in her seat on her balcony, “Of course, she is! You’re a tea-”

“Je l’aime,” he whispered, the cold late-autumn winds carrying his words away, “Je l’aime tellement.”

The superheroine was torn between pity and frustration. Of course, she loved her kitten and he needed someone’s love desperately, but perhaps that was precisely the problem. He needed someone’s love. It didn’t have to be her. Not when she loved Adrien. 

“D-doesn’t Ladybug love all of Paris?” she tried, the words falling lamely on her ears as well. 

He smiled weakly, his sharpened canines gleaming.

"I'm sorry, Chat," Marinette fixed her eyes on her bare toes, "I know how hard it is to love someone who… doesn't feel the same way."

His attention was immediately drawn away from his own wallowing. "You do, Princess?"

The girl smiled wryly, "We ought to start a lonely hearts club."

Chat Noir laughed shallowly, nothing like his usual full-bellied, slightly obnoxious hooting, but it was very similar to - Marinette pulled her focus away from Adrien and to the boy who was actually in front of her, who was saying, "If he doesn't see what a kind, talented, funny person you are, how great can he really be?"

"It's not his fault! I'm an absolute klutz around him! I can't string two words together!" she shook her head, "I need to start playing it cool."

"Well, I happen to be cool as a cucumber," he smirked, his bravado now back in full swing, "I could show you a few moves if you want, Princess."

At this, Marinette giggled, "Every second sentence that comes out of your mouth is I love Ladybug, let's not pretend you're any better!"

Behind the mask, Adrien blushed. He couldn't help it. If someone was loved, they ought to be told. Not left alone in an empty house to eat their meals in silence… but maybe Marinette had a point? Playing it cool was the only thing he hadn't tried and whenever Marinette came up with a plan, it always worked. "So do you want to try it? Maybe compare notes?"

"Sure," she grinned, swallowing her dread at possibly giving her kitty false hope, "Now, it's very late and we both have school tomorrow. Remember, no more solo patrol."

"Superheroes ought to be exempted from school," Chat sighed and hung his head dramatically before getting down on one knee and kissing her hand, "Until next time, Princess."

Then he backflipped off the balcony and pole vaulted away.

"Until next time, mon chaton," she whispered into the wind.

"You need to tell him the truth, Marinette," said her little red kwami, Tikki, "That way, maybe he can move on from -"

"Ladybug needs to tell him the truth," the girl had gotten very good at conveniently compartmentalizing her alter egos, "And right now, I'm not -"

A bloodcurdling scream pierced the night.

Marinette groaned, "Superheroes really should be exempted from school. And annoying things like feelings. Especially when Hawkmoth is around to weaponize them." 

A moment later, Ladybug swung off the Dupain-Cheng Bakery rooftop.

“je l’aime tellement” means “i love her very much” right? right, google translate??

Join the follower celebration!

[reflectionsofacreator]

Speaking of swtor, have a snippet of some missing cutscenes from my Sith Warrior’s story. 

---

It had started pouring rain as they walked through the gates to Dromund Kaas, a steady pitter patter that blanketed the city, making everything seem quiet and dreamlike. People still roamed about outside, but more often than not, they were rushing inside or under awnings. 

“Oh man, and I don’t have a hood… my lekku are gonna get cold,” Vette complained quietly, shading her eyes as she looked up at the sky. 

“Not to worry, we won’t be out in the rain long,” her Sith said, already starting to move into the city quickly. 

“Uh, where are we going?” Vette asked cautiously, careful to keep a few paces behind. Her sith was a decent sort, as sith went, even taking off her slave collar, but… Vette was still a slave. And Sith were… well. 

“My mother’s apartment in the city,” Anariath said, frowning. “I’m not sure if she’s been deployed recently, but at the very least I would like to visit and pick up some supplies.” 

“You mother…?” Vette asked, then shook her head. “Aren’t we supposed to be going to your scary Master?” 

“He bid me take my fill of Kaas first,” Anariath shrugged, shading her eyes from the rain. Looked like she didn’t want to get her cybernetics wet. “Never mind that he’s busy with other things, and hasn’t the time to train or speak to me.” 

“Ohhh. So we’re just cooling our thrusters for a bit?” Vette asked, and went to drape her lekku around her neck to keep them warm. 

“Here…” Ana said, suddenly very close, and reaching out to lay a hood of shadow silk over Vette’s head, tucking it in around her lekku. “That should be better, right?” 

Vette swallowed and nodded, staring at the Sith human in front of her. She wasn’t bad looking, as humans went, with dark skin, darker hair, and grey-blue eyes. Cybernetics lined her forehead and chin, but they helped add to the strength of her face, instead of seeming off. 

“Don’t you need it?” Vette asked, and somehow managed not to stammer as Ana’s hands ran over her lekku. “With your circuitry and all, wouldn’t it be better for you to wear it?” 

“Hm? Oh no, my robes have a hood on them,” she said, absently pulling the cloth over Vette’s headdress. “There, that should keep the worst off of you. Wouldn’t want you getting sick.” 

“Y-yeah, thanks,” Vette said, running her fingers over the finely woven cloth. The cost of it alone would probably feed her for a week, maybe more, and Ana had just… put it on her head. 

Ana smirked at her slightly, then went to pull up her own hood. It was only because Vette was so close that she noticed, but Ana pulled it over her head far more than needed, and it seemed to hover above her head for a half second, before settling on her hair. 

“Come, the taxi’s this way,” she said, and guided Vette down the streets. 

[fanficsforpogchamps]

The SDC bois with a reader who tries to bite at them whenever they get too close for their comfort, not caring if the have a so called 'stand'

Headcanon! Touchy-Feely

Warnings: None except a few naughty words 👀 enjoy!

My Jotakak fanfic is coming soon, but keep the requests coming lovely! I’d enjoy writing your scenarios and Headcanons for every good boi out there!

(I hope this is okay! I’ve done both emotionally and physically, like actually physically biting them lmao. It was fun, so Thank you for the first request :)) )

Jotaro Kujo-

;This man is not exactly emotion material, he doesn’t understand them at the best of times, so when he sees you being recluse and lugging behind the group, he shrugs and carries on his merry way.

; he learnt from his old man that you were their translater, but had acquired no stand- and so when you first snap at him using your teeth when he brushed against your arm in a crowded market Star Platinum shot out immediately, expecting a fight. But when no Stand appeared, the larger, more colourful Jotaro was ever so confused.

; your teeth were firmly locked into his fingers as they had been wiping some sweat from your forehead. The beads were trickling down and it bothered the hell out of him, and it was only when you let go did he see that you made a sizeable mark on his middle and fore finger.

; “you annoying bitch,” Jotaro had growled, itching at the marks left by your teeth, and you slinked away back to Avdols shadow where you resided for the rest of the trip... until they tried to get you to stay behind when they found DIOs mansion.

; “you don’t have the powers we do, you need to stay behind and live, if not for us,” Avdol tried reasoning, but your stubbornness is why earned you your title as a Stardust Crusader. But when the man, the myth, the legend, Jotaro Kujo has started to approach you, there was an internal battle. Even after a few feet he was already waaaay beyond your comfort zone. “Do as they say, and just stay behind. DIO will most likely kill you if you go in without our powers,”

; die? You will? You had bared your teeth at him before spitting out a harsh “fine,” and turned away from the group. “I know I don’t have a Stand... whatever they are. But you all better come back to me alive,”

Kakyoin Noriaki-

; Kakyoin was a very naturally comfortable person to be around, I mean hell, even Jotaro was happy when he had returned from hospital (but that’s further on-)

So when your teeth managed to snag at Kakyoins expensive school jacket on the Strength boat, he was a little more than surprised to say the least.

; he physically recoiled, before shaking his head and gently prying off your teeth. “Now now (Y/N),” he chuckled nervously, before managing to get the fabric from your teeth without damaging it. “No need to act like a dog now do we?”

;you had nearly died in that damned boat and was now out at sea again, having to deal with the infuriating closeness of everyone- but it seemed there was already a gap between both your sides as they all favoured to huddle further up the raft.

; “we don’t want your teeth in our clothes! I paid a lot for these!” Joseph cried out accusingly, finger shoved in your face to signify that there was distrust with you. That... hurt. Despite your emotional turmoil previously with them it still hurt when the man jabbed a finger your way. “Shut the fuck up old man before I shove your head under the water,” you snapped, arms crossed over your chest.

; That seemed to have shut Joseph up, as he cowered away, before Kakyoin started laughing. That was amazing! He knew there was something special about you. “Ahhh don’t mind him (Y/N), he gets paranoid,” Noriaki tired to inform you, managing to brighten up the mood from the older Joestar bringing it down a notch. “He needs to watch where he’s pointing that finger, or he will have to add another mechanical limb to the list,”

; it made Kakyoin smile, seeing as you full well meant every word you spoke and clearly Joseph was using your temper against you. Kakyoin shifted in his seat before sliding across to sit closer to you, and nudging your shoulder with his own.

; too close too close too close- is all you thought of as The red headed Japanese school student slid closer and closer to you. Despite the size of the raft you had been comfortable with no one being near you, but now that he was closer you felt your heart stop.

;”Don’t take no offence. He’ll learn his lesson soon enough,”

Jean-Pierre Polnareff-

;when you had stepped off the plane with Iggy, the man thought you was the most gorgeous thing in the world, so when his flirtatious advances caused him to nearly jump out of the desert buggy- he was shocked.

; The Frenchman swore out in french, gesturing vividly for dear life as he had come to realise maybe.. maybe you weren’t as nice as you were portrayed to be? Maybe he should stay away?

; Blast it all to hell! Polnareff thought as he continued to fling flirty-esq comments your way. The travel was hot, and on you lap was Iggy- the animal which had processed to rip out a lot of his silver locks which were gorgeously prepared this morning. He scowled, before turning up his nose and giving up for a while.

; if it hadn’t been for you baring your teeth and snapping the words “dirty bastard” at him, he wouldn’t have stopped the flirting behaviour, but something about the way you flared up at him made him believe you were a full blown Stand user. Because god knows that only stand users would be that aggressive.

;but when he found out you was just another normal person; unable to grasp the thoughts or view his glorious Silver Chariot his heart sunk. So you was just another heartless tease then. He nearly cried at the idea of someone as beautiful as you being a dastardly tease, set to destroy him.

;The buggy had been overturned, and Polnareff was clutching Kakyoins body. You had reluctantly hopped on top of the car as well, your body pressed against Jeans because of N’Doul. You could see the mental struggle in his eyes. He didn’t want to get too close to you- yet he needed to keep Kakyoin safe. So you opted to helping him, fingers wrapping around the uniform of your cherry loving friend and dragging him just a bit higher up the buggy.

;”I may not have a stand to help,” you choked out, struggling slightly. “And I may not be able to see yours- but I’m going to help right now,”

;from then Polnareff could see you was a determined person, and while you possessed no stand it drove you to help more. You would be useless in the eyes of anyone else- but Jean-Pierre Polnareff could see your worth from the moment you thought of helping them.

Joseph Joestar-

;Joseph knew you weren’t a Stand user from the start, as you hadn’t been able to see Purple Hermit when you met him. You were a translator, and as much as Joseph loved visiting Japan- it hurt him when he tried to order in English and no one could understand him, which is why you were with him.

; you used to be such a good kid, so social and friendly- yet when he met you again it was hard to believe you were the same person. You were snappy and seemingly always grumpy, ready to bite someone’s head off if they spoke wrongly. You nearly gave someone a heart attack at a store because they bumped into you, and the look from your eye caused them to sweat profusely.

; When you met Holly however, your sour mood disappeared almost completely and underneath emerged the soft child you once was, a small smile on your face as you chatted with his daughter.

;He knew holly had that affect on people but on you? He was sure it wouldn’t work yet here you were, small Japanese tea cup in your grasp and a soft laughter to your words.

;The only way he knew you was real was when you were alone with him again, and he decided to open his big mouth and ask about why you was so nice to Holly- when your teeth suddenly bit down on his metal hand which had been waved too close to your face.

;his signature ‘OHHH MY GOOOUDDDD!’ Was raised from his voice as he viewed the missing fingers off his metallic hand. “Don’t be so loud asshole, Kakyoin is still asleep,” you had snapped, before dropping the fingers in his lap and sighing.

; the one time you showed any sort of love or kindness towards him was... well... the airport. Your entire journey led up to this moment, the three people you stood besides were sobbing, and there was a small tear that slipped across your cheek- a moment of weakness that Joseph caught as you all recognised the harrowing details of your journey... it was over-

; “I miss their faces,” you admitted to him, one hand over his metal one for some sort of comfort as you both rested in your plane seats. You felt his thumb graze your knuckles as he held your hand close. You knew he had lost Ceaser, Speedwagon, Lisa Lisa, Erina... and now Avdol and Kakyoin. It must be hard, and you felt sympathy for him, yet never disclosed this to him.

; “I know, so do I,”

Muhammad Avdol-

;his first snippet of your uncomfortable boundaries was when he first met you with Joseph Joestar, watching as you managed to snag the coat arm of the elder JoJo as the coat had smacked your nose softly as his arm raised in greetings.

;He knew from then on to avoid you, or just not to get beyond your boundaries. He was not exactly going to bother you if everyone wanted the best trip. He smiled back at you occasionally to allow you the knowledge that he was there and would respect you.

;you had only snapped at him once, but he expected it. His body appeared to move in front of you at a ghostly pace, almost as if arisen from the dead.

; you had weeped over his body, mourned and sobbed despite your harsh exterior. The tears nearly flooded from your eyes at his sudden appearance, but the anger boiled and bubbled over that sadness you felt.

;”So is there just s reason why I was not told?” You inquired, body remaining frozen as your shoes firmly remained placed in the sand of the beach. “Don’t give me the BULLSHIT you told Polnareff,” there was the snap that made Avdol twitch alway. “Let’s get this DIO shit over with so I can formally beat you all,” your teeth bared at them, before you composed the calm exterior you once had and made your way to the submarine.

;Avdol knew you meant well, the shock must have been fully graced if you admitted to pouring the contents of your heart out when his body had just been moved to an infirmary. A small smile crossed his lips as you passed him, head set forward and confidence leaking from your body as if you had a new ideal.

;”I’ll hold you too that (Y/N),” he smiled, hands now slipping into his sleeves as he followed your path with the rest of the Crusaders.

[bomberqueen17]

confusion

oh also, my notifications are currently useless because of the post about being a slaughterhouse worker, which is great, i wrote that because I wanted people to read it, but this hellsite, regardless of who it belongs to, is fundamentally unusable for communication, so. i see glimpses sometimes that people have replied to me or something, but i never actually get a chance to read them, and sometimes i can see them eighty times on my dashboard but not in a way where I can actually reply to them, so. *shrug* 

I’m sort of stuck at the moment in a kind of maelstrom of differing impulses, and I want to do a lot of writing and I can’t focus on one project. Currently I’ve got four going? five? I keep accidentally opening Google Docs and then being like ohhh that one. And then I add a sentence to each, and waste all my set-aside writing time on rereading. 

I think the issue is that none of them are currently telling a story I’m horny to tell, to use the current parlance. 

Here are some snippets anyway. Two original works, a Good Omens, and a Goblin Emperor. 

solarpunk cyborgs: 

The coronation was a glittering event, formal and remote and high and ceremonious. Ena stood off to the side where he belonged, a reasonable distance away from Zalanat, separated from him by the entourages of his sisters. The one he hadn’t met yet was there, in a softly-draped gown suitable for a new mother, and she looked at him sharply but did not approach him. He should meet her; she was his half-sister, but now was clearly not a good time. Rusada smiled at him, and Liatra was in her escort and gave him a wink that for some reason made him blush. 

When she happened to turn, Ena noticed in some shock that Liatra’s exquisitely fancy dress had more or less no back; it went around her shoulders and then swooped down nearly to her waist, exposing the long sweep of her spine and the broad wings of her shoulder blades, and an impressive set of well-defined back muscles. He had never seen anything like it, and stared entranced until he caught himself and tore his gaze away.

He wasn’t sure what he felt about it, or why he kept wanting to look at her again. 

****

a Good Omens thing I was emphatically not going to write: 

“What do you get out of this?’ Aziraphale asked, catching the demon by the wrists. “If it’s not the temptation of me, what in Hell’s name could you possibly be getting out of this?”

“Maybe I just like it,” Crowley said, far too casually, tilting his head so his hair fell back fetchingly. 

“Why do you like it, though?” Aziraphale persisted, struggling with himself. 

“It’s hot,” Crowley said.

“I don’t-- if you don’t tell me I won’t do it,” Aziraphale said. “I know you think I’m just a helpless hedonist but if you think I don’t know how to deny myself--” and he backed up his threat by pushing Crowley back. 

Crowley looked resigned. “It feels good,” he said, but there wasn’t all that much conviction behind it, like he knew Aziraphale wasn’t going to find it adequate. There was a moment, and then he took a deep breath, looked down, and said, “I, it’s, it feels like Grace, angel, if you must know.”

“Grace,” Aziraphale said. Crowley couldn’t mean--

Golden snake eyes flicked up to glare at Aziraphale. “Grace,” Crowley said firmly. 

Divine Grace. God’s love. The thing that lived at the core of Aziraphale’s celestial being and illuminated him always.

The thing that had been ripped away from Crowley when he had Fallen.

Aziraphale forgot to breathe for a moment, and then wheezed for it like he’d been punched. “Crowley,” he said.

“Don’t,” Crowley said, face twisted in anger, “make it into something it’s not, angel, I know fine well what is and is not possible. Don’t delude yourself I even want--” He broke off, hissing, and went on in a moment, more composed, “I wouldn’t take Her back if she’d have me, it’s not that at all. It just feels good. That’s all. The way you like chocolate even though you don’t need to eat.” He sneered a little. “A demonic version of hedonism, if you will.”

*****

oh yes still noodling around on Goblin Emperor, this is a Csethiro/Maia scene: 

He kissed her shoulder. “I thought I hurt thee,” he said, pressing his face against her neck.

“No,” she said, “never, my love.”

But she’d distressed him, she could tell; he was tense, curled into her. She kissed his forehead, and his hair. “I mean it,” she said, “thou hast never hurt me, I have no fear thou ever wouldst.”

“An I did,” he said quietly, “wouldst thou tell me?”

She thought briefly of their wedding night, that fleeting moment of resigning herself, but then she thought of what it had come to. “Yes,” she said. “I know thee, now, and I know thy heart.” 

He was quiet, and she couldn’t tell if he was convinced or not. After a moment she added, “I don’t know what’s in thy heart, love, but I know something of the shape of it. An thou didst hurt me, I know I could tell thee, and thou wouldst not again.”

He was still quiet, thinking that over, and she fought down the urge to keep talking, recognizing that it wouldn’t help. “It isn’t possible to know what’s in someone’s heart,” he murmured finally, contemplatively.

And it struck her, then, a truth: “Thou wouldst not tell me if I hurt thee,” she said. 

Again, a long moment of quiet. Then: “I can’t promise I would,” he said.

****

and somehow i wound up re-opening a doc I started just after Kyrgyzstan: 

“He doesn’t like me much,” Nuradil said. “He’s not really fond of any of us but he hates me especially. I’m sorry, he was probably crude to you because he thinks you and I are friends.”

“I mentioned you by name and he acted like it was unthinkable that I’d even know your name,” Damira said. “I guess he figures if I’ve spoken to your family then clearly the two of us are having an affair.”

“He wanted to fuck me,” Nuradil said. “He tried to make it a condition of our employment. He doesn’t think I’m enough of a person to be allowed to turn down any offers I get. Of anything.”

“That’s disgusting,” Damira said. 

“Yes, well, he’s not entirely wrong,” Nuradil said. He sighed, face obscured entirely as he looked away. “So maybe you see why I was afraid of answering you at all when you spoke to me, and why I maybe cling a lot to weird old-fashioned customs.”

“You’re allowed to practice your beliefs as you like,” Damira said mildly. 

“I’m being ridiculous,” he said. “Don’t think I don’t know that. But I’d rather do that than fend off insulting offers like Artraim’s all day.”

“You’re not being ridiculous,” Damira said. 

He didn’t answer for a moment, and she tried to read his expression without seeing any of his face. His shoulders had gone stiff, and she realized belatedly that she might have seemed condescending. Too late, she tried to think of a better way to phrase it, but he turned his face toward her and his eyes were cold. 

“I don’t think you have the point of view to tell me whether I’m justified or not,” he said. “I’m sure you took a whole class on it at university, but we’re not in a university now.”

“I know that,” she said, fumbling for a better answer, but he didn’t give her time. “Wait,” she said, as he started to ride away, “I’m on your side!”

“You can’t possibly be,” he said, not unkindly. “We’re not even playing the same sport.”