#ok also there's a “sex” scene I have thoughts on where neither of them want it and he plays it that way imo

[necromancy-savant]

More people should watch Conan the Barbarian so I can share my thoughts on it

[hyun-xxe]

You're Mine, Silly! (PART 2)

summary: He was once your Bias of your favorite Kpop group, BTS. However, seeing his true colors made you rethink everything you ever thought of him. Who truly is Jungkook?

Warnings: non-con touching, non-con kissing, kidnapping, drugging, forceful grabbing, non-con sex, smut

Part 2!

*sorry for any spelling errors!*

Yandere!Jeong Jungook x F!reader

You didn't want to meet up with Jungkook, it was the last thing on your plate. However, you knew the power he held and how he could make your life a living hell.

After receiving his text about where to meet him, you texted your boyfriend everything that happened to update him about the situation.

Your heart broke seeing his messages and how sad he was, Elijah didn't deserve this and neither did you.

Jungkook: make sure to dress nicely, ok? i want to see my love looking her best!

You sighed as you slipped on your pink floral dress, the cotton material hugging your chest and body nicely. Not only that, you also made sure to place your phone on voice message so you could use anything against him if the worst happens.

After seeing you were ready, you drove over to the newly opened cafe that everyone was currently obsessed with. It scared you knowing that the place was most likely going to be packed with customers and some might be fans of the group.

You texted Jungkook, letting him know you were there. When he told you he was inside, you grabbed your purse and walked through the doors only to be shocked at the scene.

He wasn't wearing any disguise or hat like he promised, he was just out in the open, smiling at fans and even signing one paper from a fan. It made you freeze in your step. He set this all up and there is nothing you could do about this.

His eyes met your figure and he stood up, pushing some of of the people out of the way. Once he met you, he gave you a kiss on your cheek before directing you to sit down in his booth.

All the fans around him smiled and giggled, ogling about how cute you two were. A big part of you wanted to scream that he was a crazy man and that you two weren't even dating, but you knew you would be the one looking crazy.

"How are you my love?" he asks, giving you a big smile.

If none of this were to happen, you would've fallen for that smile and gushed about how innocent he is.

"I-I'm doing good. I thought this was going to be a private dinner?" you whispered, looking around and making sure no one was listening. Luckily his bodyguards were sitting in the booth behind you guys so you had freewill to talk a little louder.

"Oh, I don't recall saying it was going to be private darling. What made you think that?" he chuckled, picking up his menu, "What do you want?"

Was this man serious? You thought to yourself. It pissed you off how condescending he was being and made you feel stupid.

"Jungkook, you know why I am here in the first place. Besides, you promised you would wear a disguise!" you hissed, giving him a glare.

He gives you a sad look and sighs loudly, loud enough for some nearby to hear. "I-I'm sorry Y/N! I didn't mean to surprise you like this! I just wanted the be-best for my love!" he looked down at his hands, playing with them.

You saw the others give him a look of sympathy all while giving you a tiny dirty look. He was playing his cards.

"No, don't say that honey," you grabbed his hand softly, making you cringe inside, "I just had a tired day at the office and I shouldn't have taken it out on you."

Jungkook gives you a smirk, earning his respect just a little for also playing this game. But he knew he could do better.

Taking his hand out of yours, he placed both on each side of your face and pulled you in, giving you a almost sweet kiss, but you knew that this kiss also had a warning to it.

After he released you, he held your hand again, preventing you from wiping it off in a subtle way.

"Are we going to talk about this whole thing?" You ask, glaring at him, "I want to go back to how things were."

He pretends to ignore you as he picks up his menu with his free hand, scanning through the options, "They have a blueberry muffin, you want to try that?" he asks.

You grit your teeth at his reaction, "Jungkook, I'm talking to you. You had the fucking audacity to kiss me without my permission and now you're ignoring me."

"What is there to talk about?" he questions, "We are on a date, lets just enjoy it."

He was getting crazier and crazier each time he opened his mouth. This man truly believed that based off your five minute convseration with him that night, that both of you were together and happy.

"This is NOT a date! This is to put those rumors aside and get back to my life with my loving boyfriend. Now, if you have nothing to say, I am going to leave."

He chuckles and shakes his head, "You really think I'll let you go this easy?" he lowers his head a bit, "You're fucking stupid if you think you can just walk out of here. Did you forget the power I have? Do you really want to test it?"

The threat sounded fake and real at the same time. You didn't know if he was truly insane enough to pull a stunt like that, but knowing him and how hes acting, you knew better than to test his patience.

"Why me, of all people? Isn't there much better girls out there?"

He gives you a soft look and you could've sworn you saw the normal side of him.

"There is just something about you that caught my attention. I just couldn't stop thinking about you and knew I ahd to make you mine," he leans in closer to you, "This hold you have on me is making me crazy. If i could, right now I would bend you down and fuck you right here, showing everyone you're mine."

Your eyes widened and your face became hot. Did he seriously just say that?

"Oh, that idea made you blush huh." he smirks.

You shake your head, "No, it didn't! Jungkook, I have a boyfriend. Just because you found me attractive and fell for me, doesn't give you the right to pull this shit."

Your response made him go quiet for a minute as he seemed to be in deep thought. Did it really work? could that wake him up?

He stood up and held out his hand to you, "Come on love, lets get out of here."

You were so confused by his actions and looked around to see everyone looking with their phones out.

"What are you talking about?" you asked, not taking his hand yet.

He smiled and grabbed your hand by force, "I wanna show you something!" he hoist you up from your seat and leads you outside to a black van where the windows were shut closed with curtains.

"W-wait!" you say, trying your best to pull back, "I have my own car, I'll meet you there, I promise!"

Jungkook shakes his head, "No, there is no need. Give your keys to my guys and they'll take it for you."

You looked at him as if he was crazy, which he was, "No, are you kidding me? Thats my car!"

He steps close to you and whispers in your ear, "Do you really want to act like a brat with others looking right now?"

Knowing he was right that others were watching and recording, you gave your keys to his guys and got inside the van with him.

As you entered, you looked aorund and noticed the black interior. The curtains were enclosing the back to the front and it made you scared about the ideas this crazy man had in mind.

"Where are we going?" you asked, trying to keep your voice calm.

"You'll see." he says and starts the car, driving to god knows where.

It took about 15 minutes to make it to the destination and as you looked out, your heart dropped. It wasa secluded area where the trees were tall enough to block out the sun that was out. It was obvious you were in the woods but you couldn't tell how deep since this entire way you were just lost in thought on how to escape.

"Uhm, what are we doing here?" you asked, giving him a nervous smile.

He turns to you and unbuckles your seat belt, "Come on, lets go back there."

You turn to open the door and run out, but he locked it just in time.

"do you think I'm that stupid without taking into account that you could easily escape?" he laughs, "How cute."

"W-what if you try and kill me?! I don't want to be near you!" you screamed, banging on the window, hoping there was someone outside that could hear you.

"Y/N, I would never hurt you like that, I love you too much to even think of that. come on, lets just go back there."

As you two finally make it to the back, you tried your best to pull on the handles of the doors, hoping it would open. You don't know what plans he has, but you sure as hell weren't going to stay and find out.

"If you fucking touch me, I'll do everything I can to scratch and bite." you warned him, pointing your finger at him.

He just smiled and moved closer to you, "You threatening me turns me on just a bit." his voices darkens. "Please, continue your threat."

You found him sick and scooted farther away, but as your back hit the door you knew there wasn't enough space between you.

"Please, Jungkook, lets not do this. Just let me go, I promise I won't tell anyone about this."

He stares deep into your eyes and smiles, "Are you kidding me? I will never let you go, you're the best thing that has happened to me." He reaches his thumb out and brushes against your lips, playing with them.

You pulled your head back, pushing his thumb away. "Don't you touch me! Don't think I won't hurt you!"

Jungkook takes a step back, "fine, whatever you say princess. I won't touch you."

You thought of plans to escape and were to lost in thought that you didn't notice how hot it became. The windows felt cool and so did the seat, so why did you feel like you were burning up.

fanning yourself and looking around, you tried getting cool air to hit you, but even if it did, the feeling would go away after a second. "Why is it so hot in here?" you asked, looking at Jungkook who seems to be perfectly fine.

"What are you talking about?"

You ignored him and tried sitting up, flipping your dress up to fan your stomach and legs. When your hand accidentally brushed your breast, you flinched back. It felt so sensitive.

Suddenly, your core felt wet and when you sat up more, the friction of it hitting the seat made you bite back a moan. It felt so good, and yet so sensitive.

You needed to feel it more, so you did it again and this time, a string of moans left you.

Jungkook looked over your way with his eyebrows raised, "Is everything good there?" he asked, smirking at the scene.

Trying your best to act normal, you nodded your head. Every place of you ached and you needed to be touched. "What is happening to me? Why am I acting like this?" you bite out, squeezing your eyes shut.

He moved closer to you, his had gracing over your breast, drawing out more moans from you.

It felt amazing.

"Did that feel good?" he questions in a lower voice.

You nodded your head, still refusing to open your eyes.

"Want me to do it again?"

you shake your head, remembering Elijah and how devestated he would be if he found out about this. He was already hurt by everything, why would u hurt him again?

"G-get away from me, now!" you yell, looking the other way.

Jungkook chuckles and moves closer, his body trapping you. His lips ghost your neck as he licked up to your chin. You tasted amazing. "We both know you need this, why fight it?"

his had went to your boob as he played with it all while sucking on your neck and chin. Everything felt amazing and you couldn't find it in you to tell him to stop.

A moan left you as he turned your body to him.

He kissed up to your mouth and looked deep into your eyes, "You want this, right?"

You shook your head, "E-Elija- nngh!" he kissed you with passion, cutting off your sentence.

His hands started to roam dangerously low to your area and it felt too good to stop him. You didn't want it, you wanted to fight him off, but you couldn't.

Jungkook's fingers touched your clit and started to rub circles, feeling the wetness through your panties.

"You say no but your body says differently."

He stops kissing you and lowers his head to your core, removing your panties down to your ankle and staring at your glory.

It looked delicous and he wanted to taste every part of you.

Diving his head in, he starts to lick around, and once he heard you moan loudly from his tongue swirling your bud, he continued to do so at that pace, sometimes going faster and rough.

"P-please st- nnghh! Mhmmm~" you lewed out, heading thrown back as you felt your legs become weak from the sensation. You felt a knot in your stomach and felt yourself needing to release.

"S-so close!" you yell, moans leaving your lips.

You were so close, but he stopped. Why did he stop.

Looking down, you notice the smirk on his face. "You told me to stop, so I'll listen to your wishes." he wipes your juice off his face and was about to stand up, but you pushed him back down.

"Please, Jungkook! Please, pleasure me and take me." you plead, wanting to feel that rush again.

He smiles and raises an eyebrow, "But, who do you belong to?"

Everything about Elijah left your mind as you felt him near your core. "You, I belong to you!"

Thats all he needed to hear as he dove back in, licking and slurping up all your juices. As he was doing so, he entered two fingers into your pussy, feeling you tighten around his fingers. He needed to be inside you.

When you released all over his face, he made sure to lick it all up. It felt like heaven to him seeing your face and how good he knew you felt.

He quickly unbuckled his pants and drew out his hardened member, picking you up from the seat and onto the floor, he crawled ontop of you and gave you sweet kisses.

"I've always wanted this." he whispers before shoving his dick inside, feeling your pussy tighten around his member gave him the euphoria he never knew he needed or could experience.

He brutally kept his pace fast and strong, hearing you moan out his name and claw his back knowing it would leave marks on him and it excited him more, it would leave your marks.

As he kept slamming in you, he gave you kisses everywhere and made sure to whisper sweet nothings in your ear. He loved how you reciprocated things back and soon, you came all over again.

He was so close to he held you close as he finally released inside of you, white strings coating your walls.

Jungkook laid on top of you, after that, still leaving small kisses on you. He made sure to keep his dick in you so his cum could stay there, hoping that soon maybe, he could be apart of your forever.

As things died down, everything crashed on you. The betrayal that you knew Elijah was going to feel, Jungkook taking advantage and having his way with you.

All of this made you gasp. You haven't taken your pills in months and you didn't wear protection.

Jungkook looked up and smiled, "I'm never letting you go, I love you too much."

[celluloidbroomcloset]

I'm not sure this'll make sense so bare with me.

I remember you asking the other day why people seemed to want to find angst in Ed and Stede's first time. While I can't answer that (other than noting queer people love angst lol), I can share my own jumbled thoughts.

The moment where Stede pulls Ed into the cabin is one of the most effective moments in the show for me. Whenever i see it i feel like my heart's getting squeezed. It's pretty much because of Stede's face (damn you Rhys). Yes, there's love there but there's also PAIN. Pain that is never really adressed I need someone else to put it into words because I cant

Ah, part of what I was getting at was that there's no need to invent angst (e.g. Ed somehow not consenting or being coerced into sex because Stede needs it), when there is actual angst there on the screen.

Yes, absolutely, Stede is in pain. He's a bundle of emotions that he doesn't have the words to work through. He kills Low for a whole bunch of reasons, most of which he's unable to unpack in the moment. Ed showing up to talk to him and ask him if he's OK - this guy who has likely never once in his entire life had someone ask him if he's OK and really care to know the answer - absolutely shatters him. I think his reaction at the door is kinda what Rhys said: he's got to do something.

The viewer sees Stede cry quite a bit, but he almost always conceals it from other characters - turns his face away, doesn't let the tears fall, waits until he's alone (again, this sense of a man who feels really deeply and is very sensitive, and has been told he's not allowed to be that because men shouldn't be like that). Except with Ed. He doesn't conceal it with Ed, either when he's begging Ed to come back from the gravy basket, or when he's crying in his cabin. Ed sees exactly how the murder affects Stede - he's the only one not cheering - and immediately goes to him.

So, yeah, I don't think there needs to be some invented "Ed didn't actually want to have sex" thing to make it more complicated and angsty. There's plenty of angst there. But the love scene itself is very deliberate - it's not that bundle of emotions that Stede doesn't understand. He understands very clearly that Ed is there, that Ed loves him, that Ed still loves him after the murder of Low, and that he loves Ed. And Ed understands all that too. Neither of them are going through pros and cons and explaining things to themselves or analyzing "yeah, I'll fuck him because he needs it/I need it."

It's purely down to: "I love him."

[ughmyreality]

Thoughts on S3 E4

(SPOILERS ahead)

There might be positives, there will be negatives, so please be forewarned that I am not going to solely praise the show. Also, it needs not be mentioned, I am but a single negative person on the internet talking about a fictional story. We are all not going to agree.

On another note, this episode in particular left me with a lot of feelings so I might make another post talking about the dynamic of Polin entirely. Anyway... With that said, let’s move on.

Episode 4-

I’m all for Lord Debling. He’s shown to have not only more personality than Colin but also have a genuine interest in Penelope. I like that they’ve tried their hand at showing an unconventional man.

I miss Brimsley and Reynolds together. They could be a cutesy old couple together. Sigh… but at least Brimsley hasn’t lost his wit.

Oh my gosh, the introduction of John! I’m all for it. Finally Francesca looks genuinely happy. I like the fact that neither of them quite know what to say. This is how you do “awkward wallflower”.

Who cares about the “give up the club” storyline? Honestly, I’m just going to start skipping it and if I miss something important I’ll just read some spoilers. 

I particularly like the hairstyle of Penelope in the scene with Lord Debling. Although I have been enjoying their outfits, I feel like a lot of them look way too modern. I understand that Bridgerton is not an accurate historical show, but I feel like the issue is more glaring this season.

I’m glad someone else said it. Colin was not the only one holding that balloon down but everyone swoons for him. 

Staring like a creep doesn’t convey romance, at least not to me. I’m sure if anyone were dedicated enough to count the line between Penelope vs Colin, you’d find that Colin has barely said anything in comparison. Out of the 4 episodes so far, I’ve taken from them that Colin is popular with the ladies, likes to travel, and doesn’t care for LW. Ok? Where is the suave main male lead? He has not an ounce of charm. I can’t see how even Polin fans can be satisfied with the way things are going. Colin is barely in it, Penelope plays the victim and finds herself in more trouble, and the rest is watered down filler. 

Honestly, I’m keeping my hopes up for the future. I surprisingly enjoyed Anthony’s season, even though he previously got on my nerves, so I thought maybe they’d surprise me again. I don’t know why they would go out of the book order. They could have had a more subtle opportunity to establish Polin, for better or worse, while also moving on to the fan favorite, Benedict.

Here we go again. At this point these bland sex scenes are nothing more than a hindrance to the show. They’re lifeless and add nothing to the plot.

Girl, “and I should like to call on Miss Cowper a moment”! My head is already filled with ships with no hope of being cannon and it appears I have found another one. 

I’m not understanding why Cressida’s father doesn’t want her to be around Eloise. Because of the scandal? Like it or not the Bridgerton name has shown to still hold quite significant power. If anything he should be happy they’re friends.

How in any way has Colin been aware of others' needs? All they do is tell us about Colin’s character rather than show us. I have seen not one instance of Colin caring for someone else. If we’re talking about caring for other people, we should be talking about Anthony. The one who cared and helped all his younger siblings after the death of their father. The person who despite his sometimes harsh ways, wants the best for them all. Colin is hardly ever home so when would he have the opportunity to be caring. He can waste money freely on his travels without thinking of anyone else. He can see the clear feud between Eloise and Penelope but still somehow make it about himself. It’s pretty obvious that Eloise has a closer relationship to Benedict and if Colin was so concerned he would have asked him what’s wrong. He seemingly doesn’t care that Penelope might have found a genuine man but is thinking instead of how seeing them together makes him feel. He has no consideration for his friends if you can even call them that. They inlist in idol chatter about women. He comes to a sudden realization and tries to confide in his friends only to find that they don’t care and why should they. It seems as though they have never had a decent conversation beyond their own sexual adventures so why should they suddenly care about how he’s feeling. He doesn’t spend enough time with the people he supposedly cares so much about, barely interacting with the rest of his siblings. So tell me again Violet how Colin is so caring and sensitive.

Colin has in no way been living to please others. He just returned after months away. I would think that Violet wouldn’t want him traveling for so long, she surely wasn’t pleased. He didn’t put his feelings aside and court Penelope to please her. He didn’t drop the subject or try to offer advice to Eloise about her friendship downfall which didn’t please her. Nothing he has done has been out of unselfishness. Unless you consider that poor attempt to help Penelope, which steamed out of pity rather than him truly wanting to help her.

Yes! Cressida is showing where her loyalties lie. Sticking by Eloise’s side, much more than someone can say.

Colin has no right to try and tell Penelope what to do. He had his chance more times than I can count. It’s too little too late.

I’m actually kind of sad for Lord Debling. He seems like an actual nice person and he thought he had a chance with Penelope. At least he ended the conversation nicely because I would have been more angry. 

Why is Colin’s main point against Lord Debling that he will leave. It’s almost like he’s talking about himself, he is notorious for his travels.

Penelope should have slapped Colin. Have some confidence girl! This guy literally was on the brink of marrying your cousin, publicly stated he’d never court you, and dispises your alter ego. Now for what appears to be nothing but physical lust, he barges in your carriage claiming to be entranced with you. Level up! Stop this same song and dance.

Sigh, I hate to say it, but I don’t think Luke’s acting is very good in comparison to everyone else. He hardly moves his face. It’s like those clichés of people with Botox not being able to make facial expressions. Note, how I feel they intentionally barely showed his face in this part because of this. This is supposed to be the start of a steamy interaction but Colin looks as though he couldn’t care less.

Wow… another useless sex scene. This came from nowhere. Penelope are we supposed to ignore the fact that this man rejected you multiple times but now only wants you for sex? Also, Penelope never seemed too enthralled with the idea of anything sexual but she’ll become some sexual fiend with Colin at the drop of a hat.

Where is the SLOW BURN FRIENDS TO LOVERS! I’m on the verge of madness! Tell me how Colin can profess his supposed feeling for Penelope, nearly take her virginity, and propose all in one night? This is repulsive. If Penelope had any sense of respect she’d turn down his proposal seeing as she’s Lady Whistledown, but of course that would be expecting her to take accountability so she more than likely will not. Colin has some nerve proposing too. What does he even know about her? He doesn’t like her personality but rather her new physical appearance. I feel like one of the appeals of Penelope is the fact that she’s a plus sized woman, which is great. However, what message is this sending to people? That ‘Oh well, you know that plus sized girl that has a crush on you? Maybe if you ignore all the things you don’t like about her you’ll realize she’s just another woman after all. Just another person to have sex with.’ I wanted this to be a situation where Colin ends up liking Penelope for her, albeit awful, personality. Because any random guy can like you for your looks but not anyone will love you for your flaws and all.

This carriage scene doesn’t hold a candle to even the scene between Daphne and Simon in the FIRST season. This was nothing special and honestly I could have done without.

I’ve said it in the last part, but this only further solidified my beliefs. There is absolutely no reason this needed to drop in two parts. There is no surprise, we all know that Colin x Penelope will be endgame so what’s the point? We know that Penelope will more than likely say yes to the proposal and even if she says no, she’ll say yes eventually. There’s no suspense.

I guess for my ending thoughts I will say, I’m just glad this is over with and we can move on to some other characters in the later seasons. It will be a breath of fresh air. My only hope is that they don’t rush them like they did Polin.

Now, word on the street is that Colin is going to end up going to a brothel after he finds out Penelope is lady whistledown. I haven't dug too deep into this so take it with a grain of salt. However, if true, I have so many problems with this. 

-EXTRA SPOILERS FOR PART 2-

Why does he think mindless sex is going to solve his problems? That’s just a red flag that anytime the going gets tough he might resort to cheating.

If Penelope had true intentions of marrying Colin she should have told him the truth and been ready for a negative reaction.

I thought Colin was supposed to always think of others. How is fucking anything that moves while he’s engaged “thinking of other’s needs”?

Penelope still stays with him. Why are we feeding into the narrative that it’s perfectly ok for your partner to cheat on you? They haven’t even been together that long and he’s already cheating. It’s already a stereotype of plus sized women having “low self confidence” and they are doing nothing to stop that. 

[williamaltman]

Ok, so... I finally finished Room No.9. I have some mixed feelings...

The third route was really sweet. There are so many sweet moments between them. In Daichi's narration. The tasks of hurting Daichi were kind of nervewracking, but not too much really. The way the whole post-enema shower thing turns out makes me, again, sad at how that went on the end B/C route, because it really, really was avoidable...

I won't even talk much about ending E. It just feels like the "wrong/bad" option of the route. I'm not sure if I'm supposed to take that Seiji is really fine and distanced himself like on ending D, or if he got taken out by the people responsable for the study. Anyway, it doesn't really feel "real", even less than endings D or B.

The F ending one... Yay, they got out, they're fine, they're still friends.... They're still friends. Ugh. It's so frustrating to hear Daichi talking about just forgetting everything that happened. Like, yeah, I get wanting to "leave the room behind", but that he straight up says he'll just ignore it? That they didn't learn ANYTHING really? Even after that sex scene? Come on. They even have Seiji saying he doesn't want to get married, and Daichi talking about maybe drifting apart because they would have their own families, as if to hammer home the point that they'll really stay just friends?

Look, I can kind of appreciate the feeling of holding onto your friendship. I do. I managed to appreciate it after the other endings where that is lost. But that should be like, one of the endings. Or maybe, not even that. If it was one or the other, there should've been a romantic ending. There should've been a romantic ending one way or another. Because it's honestly so frustrating that at the end of all that they're still in denial. Or at least Daichi.

Like, again, I get valuing friendship, but Daichi is SO IN LOVE. Like he's so in love it's stupid. I'm sorry but there re SO, SO MANY LINES THAT SHOW THAT!!! Not just the ones where he generally compliments Seiji as in appreciating his good qualities as a person, but like, the ones where he notes how attractive he is. And there are a lot of those, some horny ones but also some that are neither platonic nor sexual, just, romantic. There's no way they really wrote some of those with us not meant to think that.

I guess the writers didn't want for there to be just one ending that was fully great and satisfying above all the others? I don't know. I guess ending C is the romantic one? Sure, whatever...

I don't want to read too much into it but it really does feel like the game is sort of trying to send the message that lust/physical attraction and a true/pure love are inheretly incompatible? Like it's a good thing that they'll only stay friends and never have sex or even kiss again? Like that's the only option because anything else is just a ruined friendship? I really hope that wasn't the creators' intentions.

In the end I guess I can still headcanon that in the F ending they will eventually come to terms with being in love and getting together. Who knows. Maybe I'll write something.

I'm a bit disappointed to end this with such a sour taste in my mind. I, overall, really loved the game. But I'd be lying if I said this (the way the "good ending" goes and no romance issue) doesn't make me really sad. I saw people sort of complaining about it, but I thought it was just gonna be that they didn't outright said they were in love/gonna be in a relationship but that was still implied, you know? That's what that CG in the train looked like to me... Like I saw someone frustrated that they didn't talk about their feelings but I thought it was just gonna be something like "but after everything Seiji and I are even closer" as they held hands implying a romance.

Anyways. Still a great game overall. I love the premise, the characters, the unsettling vibe that we're able to feel, the sweetness in it, all the horniness and guilt and exploration of the human psychology. The art, the voice acting, all the technical aspects. I guess it's really over. I've been finally freed from room no.9. 🫡

[zizz-asdf-re-r-o-u]

a BUNCH of Garu/Karu meta: fashion, H scenes, scars, trauma, who knows Karu, sexuality, part 1

Over the past couple days, i wrote like 398429347 garu/karu mini meta and i dont want to flood the tag each time, so here's a bunch of them! I have a feeling I'll have more brainrot about them.... so I'm making this a multipart series.

BIG disclaimer that i did not play every event nor unlocked every intimacy room, so I am probably lacking some major lore information. If anyone has opened more stories, or knows answers to my questions, or has correct information, or other thoughts in general, please let me know!

A) Karu's H scene character development:

After Eiden fucks Garu in Ch 7: hates it

MG room 5: initially hates it, but then is like ok this feels good

EB room 2: really really wants to top

HC room 5: really wants to top, tries, fails horribly

FF room 2: too weak to be able to do anything about it

EG: knows that eiden is bullshitting, ends up giving in

BS: gets actually tricked, but then is like ok this feels good

B) Tally of Garu/Karu's H scene

Garu Ch 7- Garu doggy

Garu SR - Garu forward lap anal with vibrator, switches into karu+biting

Master's Gift- Garu, standing anal through shorts, Karu repeat ch 7

Endless Banquet- Karu ear licking & fingering through clothing, Garu front riding

Howling Cyclone- Garu Eiden blowjob, Karu forward lap anal + tied Eiden with bandages

Forgotten Fruit- Karu frottage + kissing, Garu- backwards lap anal + biting

Ethereal Guardian- Garu 69, Karu doggy against tree

Binary Starlight- Karu dildo + fingering, Garu front riding

Summary: Riding Eiden's lap- Garu 4x, Karu 1.5x

Summary: Doggy- 3 total

Summary: anal anything- garu 7, karu 3.5

Garu initiates- 6/7 out 8 (depending on if SR is considered Garu initiating), Karu initiates- 0 out of 6.5. (Garu has more because of the main ch & he takes up majority of the SR H scene)

Garu is very horny & submissive and really likes anal. 7 out of 8 scenes include penetrative anal sex, whether its fingering or Eiden's cock. Interestingly, neither of them have done the infamous missionary pose- its just some kind of riding or doggy. He doesn't seem to have any physical kinks yet (aside from anal), but he's into being submissive, serving his master, praise, and definitely likes sex- so I think he'd be into trying BDSM if eiden brought it up.

The 3 times we hear Karu talk/think about sex himself, aside from wanting to top & having a major ego... i mean praise kink- MG when he pushes Garu away saying he wants to feel good, EG when he vaguely says he wants to feel good, and BS where he thinks he'd like to be fucked but denies it when replying to Eiden. Karu is starting to trust Eiden now and accept that he (gasp!) might like being fucked. While this is, yay! character development!, i'm ever so miiiildly disappointed bc I thought Garu/Karu had perfect potential to be a switch. Karu would probably suck as a top, but Dante also sucked at sex in the beginning & he's gone through character development now. (Btw, I'd just like to say that Karu is a different kind of tsundere than Edmond is. Karu has explicitly stated he wants to top multiple times. Edmond is just wishywashy and uncertain about le horny.) However, in BS, there's also a vague conversation that Karu & Garu have- I'm not sure if the translation is just skirting around the specifics, but Garu assumes Karu doesn't like some of the "other things" about being a model and says "Don't you hate those things?" Those things either mean humans in general, specifically interacting with humans, or being sexy (or all 3). So while Karu wishes he could top, is starting to accept that he also likes being fucked, he is not as ridiculously horny as Garu is. Going as far as to say Karu might be somewhere on the ace spectrum is a bit far, but I can see someone making the case for it. (Asexual/ace spectrum people can still have sex for a variety of reasons).

C) Garu & Karu's Fashion

Of our yokai love insterests- kuya cares about his appearance, yakumo doesn't have strong preferences but seems to value modesty so he knows what he's comfortable with, (if quincy counts as yokai, he probably DGAF). and then we have garu/karu.

we don't know how they picked/got their SR/R/N clothing, but we can assume its something garu & his gramps slapped together in the Dead Zone (and for some reason Garu still wears it even after moving into Aster's mansion lol). (Btw Karu did prank people by stripping them, so i wonder if what's they're wearing could've also been stolen?) As for all his other SSR outfits- all of them are given by someone else and the Howling Cyclone "outfit" was some bandages, a coat, & a pumpkin hat that yakumo/eiden/garu found on the ground.

therefore i am very very curious that, if given the choice, what would garu & karu pick for themselves? cause i feel like they would have different fashion preferences.

and then i realized- growing up mostly isolated in the harsh Dead Zone- garu/karu's never had the time to even think about fashion, so neither of them probably care nor have any shame. what we can deduce though, is that they both have praise kinks and if someone compliments them in some way, then they definitely like it, regardless of what the outfit actually is. so i'm gonna try to figure out what their fashion preferences might be once they get more comfortable with clothing.

honestly, i think garu likes revealing clothing now. the only thing we know him to have picked out, the very revealing placements of the Howling Cyclone bandages and posssibly the jockstrap in Binary Star. (In room 4, Garu says that he & Karu(!) prepared "an ultimate skill for Master" and then the camera zooms in on his crotch. Like if thats not saying Garu picked his jockstrap, idk what it means.) I also think this was learned, because in Master's Gift, Garu was still kind of clueless on how sexy he looked and now he actively seeks out sexy garments. back to HC- garu strips everything to wear just the bandages & coat. He doesn't keep his underwear or look for pants or a shirt, which means he either wasn't socially aware, had no shame, or liked how revealing it was. Also, the jockstrap was a secret present for Eiden not for the public.

Karu is a bit harder since he seems to just go along with whatever (including whatever garu wants). and even in BS when karu is finally getting some spotlight on his preferences, he only cares about food & conquering/enchanting people. anyone got ideas?

D) Who knows that Karu exists?

I'm going through the Binary Starlight Garu rooms and i realized that Karu is interacting with random townspeople and no one seems to have any issue or confusion about that.

And then I realized, that after Garu meets everyone except Dante (and Rei) in ch8, he goes to Aster's mansion and has very little screen time until ch 13, and we don't really know who Garu is hanging out with besides Aster's maids and clan members. (We don't know when the side events are taking place in the timeline).

Nonhuman/yokai/wolf reactions to Karu's existence can possibly be excused, since they're probably used to unusual circumstances. i'm gonna excuse the clan members & aster's maids cause they have daily exposure to Garu&Karu. i'll assume that the clan members & aster caught up dante with who garu was off screen and, well, now we know Rei/Karu/Garu might have some HistoryTM.

but what about random townspeople? although garu can be hyper & extroverted, he usually introduces himself as just "Hi! I'm Garu!", not Hi! I'm Garu and sometimes I switch into Karu." In summer fest, garu/karu's just there as support so he's not really making himself known to a lot of people. And in Eerie escapade, i highly doubt he was having interpersonal conversations while battling monsters in the pampo village that they teleported to. But in the BS intimacy rooms, the modeling people/store owners are having actual conversations knowing Karu's name. In fact, at the end, it seems like Karu is doing most of the modeling but when its an aspect of modeling that Karu doesn't like, Garu takes over. Does this mean that garu is pretending to be Karu, or that everyone knows its the two of them? This will be interesting…. Bonus, for those who believe that Karu's eyes are actually blue and the yellow is only for the player, i think the store owners/fans/townspeople would point out if karu's eyes suddenly changed to blue!

E) Garu&Karu's sexualities

Ok so its hard to tell since klein (and saia!) doesn't have the same concept of sexuality that earth does.

that said, the yokai also have the bonus of not being human and them being based off some animal characteristics, of which foxes, snakes, & wolves also all display homosexual behaviors. so this will be interesting! i am not a scientist, this is just based off le googles.

Foxes- a lot of these species have sex and pair with male & female foxes.

Snakes- also a lot of homosexual partners/pairings and in fact some species can reproduce asexually

Wolves- alpha male wolves have 1 alpha female mate for life but may mate with other males if they're in heat, otherwise they live in a pack

So what about Garu & Karu? Consistently, Garu has said he only wants Eiden to fuck him. So we can assume that sexually, Garu is uh master-sexual, regardless of what gender that master is. However, because he is still a wolf yokai, I do believe that he views the clan members as his pack to still share both platonic and intimate experiences. So Garu would have no problems with Eiden telling him to seduce Edmond or something. In summary- Garu is unknown leaning towards whoever he considers his alpha wolf and thinks in pack mentality, aka poly. Also, he's 100% a sub.

Karu is, once again, more complicated. He said he doesn't only belong to Eiden and calls Kuya, Kuya-sama (translated to Master Kuya) sometimes. (In master's gift, he called Kuya "wily fox" lol. I think nowadays, Kuya and Yakumo are the only one he calls by their actual names, not something like "the knight" or "human" or "the priest" or "the vampire"). Karu also has the added issue where he is poorly socialized & traumatized as HECK and trauma sure messes up your perception of relationships. In my earlier mini-meta analyzing Garu/Karu's H scenes, I said someone could argue that Karu is aromantic or demiromantic or grey-ace.

Luckily, as an aromantic sexual person with trauma, i have some experience in this realm! Unfortunately, I'm not a writer and Karu isn't a real person- so a) I don't know the intentions so we don't know if his experiences are shaped by trauma or his actual sexuality and b) since he's not real, he can be open to interpretation! But let's assume Karu's base sexuality when not shaped by trauma. His horniness level is nowhere near Garu's overwhelming horniness, and while he's not shy to sex, he needs multiple experiences before gradually warming up to the idea of sex. Garu is also clearly attracted to Eiden as a person, whereas Karu is still in denial but also unwilling to commit himself to Eiden (but does want to hang on to Eiden- see the whole human slave thing). Garu seems knowledgeable in sexiness, but Karu just seems clueless about it. He also does not seem to know about human romantic attraction general. In summary.... I don't have a good conclusion for Karu at all. But someone can use these arguments to prove that Karu might be demisexual/demiromantic or on the aro/ace spectrum.

F) Garu's throat scar

(Quick note: Did Olivine say that essence can heal scars?)

So I noticed that even though Garu casually displays his other scars, he consistently covers up his throat scar in event + SR outfits. (We can only see it in Forgotten Fruit H scenes). Although Misty Vale implies that the scars could be from the Council experimentation, the other scars also make sense for Dead Zone injuries considering Garu has no armor or skin protection. He also doesn't seem concerned about covering them or healing them (if they can be healed? Someone correct me about the above statement), but his throat scar is consistently covered.

If the events seem to take place after the main gemstone storyline. The fact that none of his (old) scars are healed means:

-Garu probably didn't learn how to heal scars in the dead zone and got used to them & his Gramps was more survivalist- he either thought Garu would have a better chance surviving when looking tough & scarred up or just didn't care about appearances. And even if he learned now/after the Main Plot, in Misty Vale, Garu doesn't care seem to care about covering up all his body scars.

-Except Garu (or at least all his clothing givers lol) does want to cover up his throat scar though. Heck, garu even covered up his neck by himself when wrapping himself with bandages. If he wanted to hide it consistently, I'm sure Olivine has ways to heal it. However, this means that scar cannot be healed, so they cover it up instead.

Yeah that's all I got with this.

............

WARNING: This section talks about trauma. I am NOT a licensed psychiatrist or have personal experience with DID. This is only based off internet research, which may or may not be reliable.

X) Garu/Karu & Rei's Trauma

There's a lot of traumatized characters in nu carnival, but i think these 2 take the cake for the amount of physical violence and/or abuse done against them whilst lacking in power*. By that, i mean while the rest of the cast all have their traumas, they have had moments of empowerment in the past, currently have moments of empowerment, they had some empowerment during whatever caused their trauma (or were forced to cause other people's traumas therefore messing them up significantly too), or are literally in positions of power with ways to control their life circumstances on their own terms. For example, Blade, Kuya, Dante, Yakumo, and Aster had awful things happen to them or were horribly manipulated by others, but Blade, Kuya, and Dante are powerful fighters that have control over their autonomy present-day, meanwhile Yakumo & Aster are in a much healthier relationship with Eiden and have confidence in their new support network. (Blade and Kuya in particular also caused a LOT other people a lot of harm so that gets a bit complicated).

Rei & garu on the other hand, have had their bodies horrendously violated, are still actively dealing with it and, in my opinion, lack significant empowerment to control their autonomy. also, none of their traumas have actually been dealt with yet, heck we barely know exactly what happened.

and their trauma responses & coping mechanisms are completely different. garu does everything he can to protect himself (DID, amnesia, garu tries to be optimistic, karu is focused on self preservation). rei does everything he can to aggravate it (unhealthy coping mechanisms, everything is transactional & extremely goal oriented, kind of apathetic, and self destructive).

In rusted nation, rei definitely remembers what's happened to him, but it looks like he sugarcoated it amidst bickering with kuya, while Eiden & blade "escaped" so eiden didn't hear it. kuya is (overly) great at keeping secrets, so eiden will probably never find out from kuya what happened to rei. for rei's trauma, its kinda obvious that, that is what's going to be his character development.

as for garu, its harder to tell. i really want to know what'll happen when they get his memory back. based off misty vale & his EG rooms, Garu doesn't seem to be actively trying to recover his memories (heck his only reactions in ch 13 are fainting or switching to Karu). that said, i'd like to *think* that garu will accept his memories based off his optimistic response in EG. buuut i think his world might also fall apart. Karu seems to remember that humans "took advantage" of him somehow and he's on friendly terms with Rei, so it's possible Rei rescued/escaped with Karu. would Garu get mad at karu for not telling him or not protecting him enough? would Karu get mad at garu for being forced to front during all the experiments? if it turns out Rei was an active part of experimenting on Karu/Garu, Karu seems to understand him, but would Garu get pissed at them or scared of them?

also, i just wanna touch on something even darker. one of my theories a long time ago was that garu might've also been r*ped bc karu has SUCh a hangup about bottoming and being taken advantage of. In fact, Eiden calls Karu out on it during EB rooms, but Karu ignores the question. Anyways i thought, oh NU Carnival is such a cheerful game that it'll never go there. And then BOOM its confirmed in Rusted Nation that the devs are willing to go there. there's also the sex automaton in blade's memories. during that conversation, the researcher says Blade's design "does not have the functions for sex", which means he either didn't have a penis or it didn't function that way it does present-day. but because Blade can have sex now with a very human-like penis & cum, that makes me wonder if Blade was eventually upgraded (especially considering the noble that funded the research) and then tested out as a sexbot with the intentions of using sex to bait for assassinations.

...

Anyways! On that note, this wraps up a buuuuunch of my random analysis and brain rotting about Garu/Karu! Just had to get this out there 0.o so thanks for reading if you got this far???

8D?

[zalrb]

It’s such bullshit that June and Luke are being rewritten as an epic love story. And people are buying it.

So, I skimmed the episode and found myself less bothered by the June and Luke scenes than I thought I would be last week? Like, she would say things and I'd be like

I could believe some of the sentiments in season 1 but post-season 1 not so much and even in season 1, first of all, for a while June thought Luke was dead

so this

had me like

and when she found out he was alive, of course she was happy, of course she reiterates that she loved him and I'm not going to say that I ever thought June stopped loving him but he didn't really come across as a constant source of strength and hope for her to me, he or thoughts of him came across as a source of guilt and if I'm being kinder, conflict, because she was becoming more and more entwined with Nick and it felt like betrayal

It was also interesting to me that when we get moments like this

it's in season 3 when she and Nick aren't in the same physical space and even in episodes like that, we still get Osblaine

where she says this

but it's a direct call back to what she says in the beginning of the episode

which goes to show that what she feels isn't just about sex, it's about love and it's that love that's helping her survive and the next episode, she sees Nick

so I was like, well this dialogue is flimsy and unbelievable but it makes sense when framed as June teaching Luke to survive, giving him things to hold on to, things to make him tough, things to give him hope, because she doesn't want him to give up and die and then I watched Inside The Episode and Elisabeth was basically talking about how June is teaching Luke how to survive in Gilead and I was like, OK yeah, I can understand the dialogue from that perspective because they were not this epic, foundational, i-will-always-find-you relationship, at best they could both rely on the other doing everything they could to find Hannah. And if people find June teaching Luke to survive to be a beautiful aspect of their relationship and story, to each their own, but like ... everything Luke and June, it doesn't really work for me.

Also, when I watched it, I just thought back to my 4x10 post about the constant apologizing June does to Luke

and that Luke does to June

which is also rooted in his own conceptions of masculinity from pre-Gilead

(and for me, the difference between Nick actively doing things to help June or support June or save June is that his actions aren’t rooted in this idea of ‘taking care of’ and more rooted in “I’ll do anything to save the woman I love”, which also isn’t to say that Luke doesn’t love June but it’s wrapped up in his sense of fragility and I find that tiring)

like for all the talk Elisabeth did in the last "Inside The Episode" about Luke and June connecting in the present, neither one of them seem to be past their feelings of ineptitude and shame or guilt, which have existed in their relationship in various ways pre-Gilead

and their relationship seems to be in this never-ending deficit and it just doesn't do anything for me.

[livlepretre]

Ok so I’ve been wondering about a few things, when Elena and Klaus are in NOLA, she tell him she knows that he’s sleeping with Rebekah and Stefan, and to me he sounded like that that was information that he would have rather her not find out. Why? Wasn’t that before he fell in love with her?

Secondly, in chapter 10 or 11 when Elena sort of walks in on their threesome, how did Stefan and Klaus not notice she was there? Like even though they were preoccupied should’ve they have vampire-sensed it?

Thirdly, how did Stefan and Rebekah feel when Klaus stopped sleeping with them?

Fourthly, I’m dying to know where Stefan and Elena are going after their field trip!!!

I love this fic so much and I read it at 3am instead of studying for my college midterms 😅 So congratulations you have me hooked! This is so much better than TVD and I actually stopped watching after season 3 because in my opinion, it was awful. Seasons 1 and 2 was peak tv. I tried to pick it up again but then I stopped watching again after Nina left. The soul of the show was gone and that was the final nail in the coffin for me.

ehh I think it was part of his private life. He wasn't going to tell her about it straight out, but it wasn't that secret either. It literally just went over Elena's head to even notice a mxm relationship between her boyfriend (whom she assumed was het) and Klaus (whom she also assumed was het), let alone uhh sibling incest. but I don't think Klaus x Stefan was all that secret, she just misread A LOT of stuff as Klaus holding Stefan captive as opposed to like... being a vampiric lover. but yeah, this is all before Klaus was in love with Elena. He falls in love with her near the end of the first nola arc. Elena actually falls in love with him first. so in that scene where Elena says she knows, he's making her spell it out because he wants her to speak blatantly about his sex life. He knows she's typically shy about that topic and he wants to push her boundaries. If Elena sees it as him not liking her knowing, that's because she's unreliable as a narrator. Pretty much any observations other than the literal dialogue is subject to Elena being an Hilarious Unreliable Narrator.

In that sex scene-- think about the incalculable stimuli we process through our five senses at any given moment. Our brains have to actually filter out most of it in order for us to pay attention to whatever we're focused on; it skips things, makes assumptions, hallucinates, all sorts of weird and interesting things. Now think about vampires. They can see and hear and smell and taste (and feel?) so much more than us. What may as well be infinitely more. I'm sure they have to filter out things too-- probably a lot of it automatically. This is my explanation for why they are able to have private conversations in vampire abodes at all. Because in theory anyone could eavesdrop at any time, right? Unless there was loud music playing all the time? But we can assume that in order to eavesdrop from a distance, they typically have to be zeroing in, because otherwise it would just be more noise to filter out, just like they ignore the sound of the worms and ants and every other insect in the ground. So what I'm getting down to-- Stefan and Klaus were distracted. They were literally mid-fuck. I hope they're not paying attention to Elena in that context, whom they can probably hear all the time anyway, whether she is accidentally peaking in or not! (Actually, can we all headcanon that they are listening to Elena during? Because that's an interesting thought.) But even though neither of them looked up, we can assume that at least Stefan was aware. He came down to the kitchen to seek her out soon afterwards-- because he knew the cat was out of the bag. As for Klaus-- I think we can assume he noticed, as well. But really, if you were having GREAT sex and then you peripherally notice someone looking in who then gets embarrassed and flees, would you stop having sex, or would you shrug it off? Again, them being too wrapped up in each other to notice Elena at all is her observation, her perception-- she is upset to discover she has yet another romantic rival for Stefan and also it's rocked her assumptions to their foundations. She's also just found out that sibling incest is apparently a vampire thing. Girl is SO unreliable about what actually happened.

How did Stefan and Rebekah feel: relieved. Stefan already felt like he was juggling too much and was one bad catch away from having his heart ripped out and Rebekah wanted to be free to pursue Stefan as her own, without her brother making her relationship difficult and about himself. But the other side of that is that Stefan was also worried about what this meant for Elena-- he had a dark premonition about it-- and Rebekah was a bit unnerved by her brother's unprecedented feelings development.

Oh, well, Stefan and Elena have to go to Chicago-- both because Klaus wants them to go, and because how could they fail to revisit the sight of their breakup?

and ooof! same feelings about tvd! it's so true!

[veryinnovative]

this is about to be a long fucking ask sorry lmao 😭 (but also..not rlly sorry)

james’ shorts have absolutely no chance against his monstrous thighs, they are fighting for their lives truly. i have always said jeg gives very sakuatsu vibes to me, but I think u could combine that a little bit with atsuhina?? james met sirius when he started high school, instantly fell in love with playing for him, and upon hearing about the younger black brother/seeing him play for the first time james instantly knows he wants to play with regulus one day as well. i think there could be a fun combination of that scene where atsumu tells hinata he will set for him one day but it’s the sakuatsu vibes of regulus just beeng entirely unimpressed with him when they first meet and even when they do start playing together. i feel like you can say that setters & liberos are the backbones of the team….james & reg being the ones to keep their teams together !!

also remus!! i vibe with him being a pinch server / middle blocker i think. imo he is very much like yamaguchi where he loves playing but he isn’t a prodigy and has no desire to pursue it beyond high school, he’s just there for the good vibes & to see sirius’ ass in the tiny lil shorts 

also going off topic for a sec here…..skimmed through your prompt list and I can very easily say I am obsessed with most of them!!! the cat cafe? yes. shibari james? need him always & forever. hockey jeg fighting through the penalty boxes?? obsessed. older reg & younger james?? tbh haven’t thought about that much but I am sooo here for it. EROTIC CANNIBALISM!! i’ve always wanted to make an attempt at a vore fic im very happy there are others out there with the same goals as me ;) alpha/alpha jeg! i am…very insane over a/b/o and love everything with them always!

ok I could probably go on forever but I will cut myself off here lol!

u cld literally send me an ask the size of a novella nd id still eat it. cass i wna live inside ur brain. the atsuhina moment never even rly came 2 me. i am so obsessed with james' dramatic point of a finger. even better if one hand is curled into the net. absolute freak behavior when he states 'one day we are going to play together. until then, good luck trying to dig up my serves every game.' nd reg's like ? ok troy bolton.

[this is so fucking random but miya twins moments between regulus nd sirius if they ever did play together. I'm thinking abt sirius going for a serve nd it hits the back of regulus' head and then they're both fist fighting]

middle blocker remus is a fav of mine. even after high school he attends all their games together with the others like the girls (marlene. mary. lily) and he always wears an extra hair tie around his wrist for sirius. like even tho they don't play together anymore remus still has a spare one.

AND THE PROMPT LIST... i genuiinely wrote like 0 </3 mainly bc my laptop died on me and the display needed changing and I'm still waiting for it to come home. BUT YOU GET ME!! YOU GET ME! i need james to be tied up and tied down. arms behind is back or to the headboard. legs bend and rope loops around them. just entirely at regulus' disposal who first edges him to hell and back nd then overstimulates him until he's crying (overstim is my fav thing to write). AND THE OLDER REG & YOUNGER JAMES IS SOMETHING IV BEEN WANTING TO WRITE FOR A WHILE.. i love it when the older one is also the shorter one nd just a grump nd wears the expensive suits nd then u have james who wears the most horrendous time-withered Christmas sweater at home in early autumn nd manages to reduce scary CEO regulus black to a sobbing mess in his bed

vore fic... i've been thinking about one that's a little more hannibal-inspired. but also one a little more supernatural? I don't know. ghoul-esque jegulus or something so that when they vore neither of them has to die. it's just about wanting to consume. to absorb. to want someone so bad you need them to continue existing inside you. like sex doesn't even cut it you NEED to crawl into their ribcage. if u write a vore fic a tag is mandatory. i need to read and eat that shit up like they eat each other. i have this one line in future chapters where james tells regulus something along the lines of 'i am so in love with you it drives me insane i don't know what the insides of your eyelids look like and you do'. it's just about being so obsessed with someone you need them to stop breathing and be the one who does it for them. needing them to have one part of you in their being at all times. then again i just write jegulus crazy like this... woops

and i swear to god last thing bc now I'm also rambling nd gonna be late but alpha/alpha drives me insane. especially if there's a rut. the mild roleplay involved in it. the power play. I had a little excerpt of it written but alas, laptop still sent for repair. a few months ago I did write a little alpha/alpha stsg thing for my best friend nd geto gritted shit out like 'im going to breed you' bc gojo was riling him the fuck up while having his back blown out and it's also just so alpha/alpha jegulus (nd rosekiller) core. i just love alpha/alpha dynamics.

OH MAN IM SORRY FOR THE SPAM LMAOO. it's like a morning paper to trudge through. either way ty for the ask love <3 I hope u have a nice day/evening/ night

[soephiphany]

I hope this is comforting enough

I was just feeling awful, and i needed something silly and small, to make me feel lighter. If you're going through some hard thing or hard place, my account is a safe space.

I don't really post much but you can also read the fic recommendations I posted, hopefully it'll make you feel better.

If you're feeling heavy, tired or overwhelmed, it's alright. You're not alone, army

You have me, the other creators and you have the boys (the songs, Bangtan Bombs and my personal fav: RUN BTS)

Take it easy, it'll be alright <3

(not proof read)

____

"What is it?" He gazed all over your body, for everything. Possible wounds, blood, just anything.

"Nothing" suddenly your hands look interesting, since you can't tear your eyes from them.

"It's not nothing" he sighs lightly and reaches for your hand "Baby, I'm here for you. You know that, right?"

"I know. It's nothing, I'm just tired" you readjust yourself on your shared bed, now with your back facing the headboard.

"Tired?"

"Yeah" he relocates himself by your side and gently rub your back

"Let's sleep then, ok?" He knows you. You don't want to sleep. You don't even know if you can sleep but he knows, and that's what's matter.

"Mhm" your small nod almost unnoticeable as you both lay down and he immediately hugs you. You hide your face in the crook of his neck.

It stays silent. He's not sleeping and neither are you, but still silent. His steady breath sounds like therapy and just like that, like that moment where you open up in therapy, you cry.

You don't sob or anything, you just cry. Maybe you're just so used to having to cry silently to not worry or wake anyone. It's already a habit, but you really feel like breaking, you feel like you're watching the last two scenes of Toy Story 3 in a endless cycle, or like you just stepped in 180 pets paws. You feel guilt, shame, grief, and you don't even know why. I mean, you know why but you didn't think it was possible to feel all at once. But i guess it is.

"You'll be okay, I'm here. You're here, we'll be okay. Everything will be fine" these are the unique things that seems to leave the man's mouth as he hugs you kindly, drawing patterns in your back with one hand and caressing your hair with other. It feels good. You're glad it feels good, at least one thing is feeling good right now.

He doesn't talk anymore but continues with tiny hums and lullabies of a sweet song, a song you know well. 'Heavenly' by Cigarettes after sex leaves his pretty soft and pink mouth in tiny sounds, just loud enough for you to hear it.

"I'm giving you all my, giving you all my, giving you all my love" he whisper-sings this part and it's literally heavenly. He's a bit insecure with his voice, but he still sings for you cause he knows you love it when he does.

He continues humming the song and it gets to a part where it brings tears in your eyes. All and everything, sounding like a dream, a fever dream maybe. You could never imagined that you'd love someone like you love him, but you do. And he does too.

"And when you're far away, i still feel it all the same" he pecks your head a few times and whisper 'ill always feel you, I'll always see you. It will be okay' and you can't help but break the thin fine line you were living in.

"We'll be alright" you knew it was his way of saying he loves you, that he's here for you and God, that was all you needed. Your sobs are silenced by time as he goes on humming the end of the song, reminding you that you're not alone and that he loves and care about you.

Your consciousness get lost in his scent, in how warm his body feels, in how light his energy is, in how domestically beautiful this is. He wishes you a small good night and pecks your forehead.

It was just one of those days, or weeks. Where everything seems to fall apart but you're not alone, you have him, you have his love, and that's more than enough.

_______

I didn't put any member implied here but my thought was on Yoongi when i wrote this, but you can imagine with whoever you want.

I just felt really heavy, and this helped me a little, even if just a little.

Whatever is happening in your life, everything will be okay. You're not alone and you'll be okay,

Life goes on, dear friend <3

Soo Soo 🌼

[jefferythejelly]

hi moss it's tinynap for the wip ask game there's multiple i wanna know about feel free to answer one of them or multiple !

karl gets abducted by aliens yay

punznap pog

karlnap chapstick

@tinynap hi jo you have chosen well 2 of these are karlnap. but fair warning one of them is probably the weirdest one kink-wise out of all of them (its the alien one)

karl gets abducted by aliens yay: fair warning this one is kind of weird and insane and only exists because i wanted to write oviposition with karl so i was like fuck it. aliens. but then i also kind of made it more insane and gave him a pussy for no reason. we'll get there. (also uhhh tws for nonconsensual body modification and sex. because aliens)

i am so bad at summarizing things this is like the third time trying to write this out bc i kept including too much detail retelling it so i'm just gonna try and go quick. karl gets abducted by aliens and afterwards discovers that his balls are gone and been replaced by a vagina. he fingers himself to make sure it's like. real and functional. and then calls sapnap because he wants to talk to someone about it who won't judge him for being crazy. they end up masturbating on call together (they have a sort of flirting situationship that both of them vaguely acknowledge but neither have really acted on). a few days pass and he gets abducted again and an alien with a tentacle dick puts a bunch of eggs in him. he calls sapnap again and they hatch a scheme where sapnap goes to nc and they pretend karl is sick and sapnap is taking care of him, in the hopes that no one will come check on them and see karl's alien pregnancy belly. that's about as far as i've actually written but i am planning on writing karl getting abducted at least one more time to y'know like. lay the eggs/give birth. and then it somehow ends in endgame karlnap👍 sorry for having weird kinks do you still love me (joke. i do not care) also fun fact i started writing this before sapnap said he wanted to fuck an alien so now i'm thinking i have to go back and write him as being more jealous of karl getting abducted lmao

punznap pog: this one's omegaverse yippee. (pre-gnf in florida) sapnap and dream have developed a sort of friends with benefits thing because dream helps sapnap with his heats, but then uh oh, dream goes on a trip to visit family and sapnap goes into heat while he's gone. because he's so used to having an alpha during his heats he's having a hard time dealing with it, so as a last resort desperate attempt kinda thing he texts punz like "hey sorry if this is weird but if i don't get dicked down soon i feel like i'm gonna explode" and to sapnap's surprise he actually agrees to come help him out! idk they fuck a bunch and punz calls him baby a lot it's cute

karlnap chapstick: ok looking back i maybe shouldn't have included this one because i forgot how short it is and i might just rewrite the parts i already have if i ever came back to it but i still think the concept is cute so. sapnap has already thought about kissing karl, but becomes a bit obsessed with it, and tasting karl's chapstick, after he sees him applying it before a stream one day. the one little tidbit of a scene i have written involves sapnap stealing karl's chapstick while he's out of the room so he can taste it on his lips, and that's kinda as far as i got. they do kiss eventually tho (like i said i maybe would've not put this one on the list now that i'm actually looking at it like it's a bit nothingburger. like i'm pretty sure i have bullet points in my big idea document that are longer than this adfjasf whatever still kinda cute i guess)

[finelinevogue]

Imagine YN doing the tiktok prank where she wipes her mouth with the back of her hand every time H kisses her djsnsjgfbg

oh i’m so in on this!! okay here we go;

“Why do you keep doing that?”

Harry stood by the door ready to go out for lunch with his friends, after having just come and given you a kiss. He had stopped short, however, when he saw you wipe away yet another one of his kisses.

You were currently filming scenes to make a TikTok where you wiped off your boyfriends kisses challenge, or whomever your significant other was. You thought it would be funny to try out on Harry seeing as he is a really affectionate and loving person. Your following on TikTok had been small to begin with, as you were only posting baking or arts videos, but as soon as you started posting videos including Harry your following shot up and now you were the most viewed account on the platform. Yeah, you’d beat those dancing phonies over in L.A. and you were proud of it.

“What?” You asked innocently from where you were sat on the couch.

“What do you mean ‘what’? You’re chuffing wiping all my kisses away, that’s what? I mean, are they too wet or do you just not love me any more?” He protested, standing with his keys, wallet and his phone all ready to leave the house except he wasn’t making a move anywhere - at least not until he’d fixed whatever problem you had with him.

“I’m not doing that.” You rolled your eyes and returned your attention back to where the TV was playing your new favourite Netflix show; Sex/Life.

“Oh i’m sorry,” Harry started sarcastically, making you so badly want to smile but you had to suppress it for the video, “so i’m just imaging my girl wipe my kisses off her face then?”

“I don’t know what you’re so worked up about baby, i’m not doing anything.” You stressed, eyes locked on the start of a steamy scene between the two main characters of the show; Billie and Brad. Fuck, was Brad hot too. Harry hated both Brad, and the actor Adam, because he’d recently found out he was your man crush and he was undeniably attractive.

“Not doing anything my arse.” He mumbled and then walked over to you, keys jangling in his pocket, “Let’s try this again.” And he leaned down to kiss your cheek, and you pouted the opposite way in response go let him kiss a broad area. He gave it a quick second peck and then turned to leave your space.

He got as far as where he’d been stood before, when he caught sight of you discreetly rubbing your cheek, with a sweater paw, where he’d just kissed you.

“That!” Harry exclaimed, making you jump and divert your eyes away from a shirtless Brad on the screen, “That right there. Just wiped my bloody kiss away!” He pointed to where your hand was lowering itself from your cheek.

“Bab—”

“Oh no, no, no. Don’t baby me.” He walked over to you, pulling out all his belongings and shoving them on the table next to the front door. He swiftly made his way over to you and literally hopped over the couch, landing on top of you with a big groan from you.

“What are you doing y’wanker?” You laughed but also moaned from the pain of him jumping on top of you.

“Right missus.” He grabbed the remote and turned off the TV, getting rid of Brad’s sexiness before Harry starts seeing red with desire or green with jealousy - neither which would be very beneficial to either of you today.

“Hey—”

“No. No more Brad. Eyes on me, woman.” He directed your face towards him and you couldn’t help but laugh. He was clearly so wound up about this and you wanted to cave, but also this content was second to none. Fans would have a field-day with this kind of content.

“Eyes on you, yes.” You said seriously, before bursting out laughing again. Harry couldn’t help but smile, even when he was pretending to be mad at you. Or was he actually mad at you? He couldn’t remember now because you were so bloody good at distracting him.

Harry leaned down and started pressing kisses all over your face. On your cheek, nose, forehead, jawline, eyelid and obviously your lips. He savoured his most precious and best kisses for your lips and his more passionate and sloppy kisses for the rest of your face. You were a giggling mess beneath him and you wanted to tell him to stop, but your laughing was too intense for you to break a word through. His kisses were mixed with his own smile and sometimes he bit down gently against your skin when he was trying to hold in his own belly aching laugh.

“How many kisses am I getting?”

“As many as it takes for you to not remember how many you need to wipe off.” He challenged back, and he’d already won because you were too lost in the fun of the moment to remember how many kisses he’d given you already.

“Baby?” Harry pulled away from you at your questioning tone.

“Yes?” He looked at you with suspicion.

“It was for a TikTok.” Harry groaned and sat up off of you, stroking his hair off his forehead and back onto his head neatly. “I’m sorry,” you rushed out, trying to save yourself, “your fans made me do it.”

“Had me bloody worried, y’absolute ninny.” He laughed a breathe of relief.

You placed your hands on Harry’s thighs that were straddling you and left them to lay rest there. You chuckled as he shook his head at you. This was going to be a good video, you thought to yourself - possibly even your best.

“Sorry.”

“Glad to know my kisses aren’t going to waste for nothing.” He chuckled, before looking at his Apple Watch with pinged at him with a text message. “Ok love, I need to go now alright?”

“Mhm. Have a nice time.”

“Of course. I’ll pass my love on.” He leant down to kiss both of your cheeks and then your lips, holding them there for a little longer than necessary. “Don’t pass on my love to Brad, thank you very much.” He got up off the sofa and made sure to emphasise how much he despised Brad in the way he said his name.

“Alright!” You laughed, watching him pick all his belongings back up. “Now go!”

“And don’t you dare wipe those kisses off.”

[spencersawkward]

*concussions and confessions//spencer reid*

summary: a near-death experience encourages Spencer to admit his feelings for his best friend, even at the risk of ruining their relationship.

pairing: Fem!Reader/Spencer

content warnings: oh boy there’s a lot. i’ll start with the nonsexual ones-- choking (again, not sexual), blunt force, violence, some angst. ok time for the fun ones-- unprotected penetrative sex, masturbation, sex dream, oral (male receiving), slight dirty talk, creampie. lmk if there are more that i missed! 

word count: 5.4k

A/N: hi omg so i actually combined two requests for this bc i loved the concepts and i didn't wanna do one and not the other. i hope i do both of these justice hehe thanks for sending them! also sorry if the unsub scene sucks-- i don’t usually write that way, so i tried my best. 

request(s): omg if you need ideas for baby spence can you do a one shot where he's the girls best friend (she's not in the bau) and they are in love but neither of them admit it and he is really hurt in a case or almost dies or something traumatic and only when he gets back they confess their love... and then have sex 😏 ive been thinking about this concept alot 😌

can’t stop thinking about baby spencer (like s2-s4) & his girl best friend losing their virginity to each other... can you write a one shot on this please?

masterlist

"when are you coming back?" you ask over the line. you're lying on your bed, legs in the air while you talk to your best friend. it's been a long day for you, but a longer day for him. it's always a longer day for him. 

"you know that I don't know the answer to that question." Spencer's voice is soft as he attempts to keep quiet. he's two hours ahead and, despite the fact that you're both night owls, the person he's rooming with tonight isn't. 

"I know, but there's this Korean film festival that starts tomorrow and I was hoping you would be here to translate for me." you examine your nails while you talk. Spencer lets out a disappointed sigh. 

it's only been a few days since he left, but it's been a week since you last saw him and it feels like a long time. whenever he's not at work, you two are joined at the hip. ever since you first met a few years back at a poetry convention in DC, it feels like he's the only person who understands you. which is weird, because you couldn't be more different as individuals. 

"you should bring one of your other friends." 

"bold of you to assume I have other friends." you joke. Spencer chuckles to himself and your heart flutters. you love his laugh more than anything in the world. 

"I thought that was just me." he says. 

"oh, it is just you," you reply flatly. "I was trying to make you feel better."

you can practically feel Spencer smiling through the phone. although you tease him pretty frequently, he's sometimes able to get in his own shots. it's what makes your friendship interesting.

"hey," you add before he can say anything more. "how's the case going?" 

Spence starts to detail the whole thing, and you listen intently, the timbre and smoothness of his voice comforting you as you slip beneath the covers of your bed. you like the way he enunciates his words, his strange manner of speaking, because it lulls you to sleep. 

you know he's talking about horrible things, but something about the sound comforts you deeply. when he's not around, you're wishing you had it bottled up. 

he lays out their profile as it stands, and you fall silent. it's getting pretty late and you have to be up early for work tomorrow, so it would be a good idea to get some real rest. plus, Spencer needs to sleep, too-- even though he probably won't. 

you remember times when he'd call you at three in the morning, his mind whirring as he played chess against himself and asked if you wanted to hang out so he could teach you how. you hate chess, but of course you said yes; you'd been head over heels with him since your first conversation.

eventually, you feel yourself start to drift off. you don't even really know what he's saying; all of it blends together until you're laying there, one cheek pressed to the pillow and the receiver against the other. 

"Y/N?" he says your name abruptly and your eyes, which have been slowly drawing shut this whole time, fly open. 

"yeah?" 

"go to bed."

"what? no, I'll wait until you're done." you shift. 

"I could hear your breathing change." 

"then why didn't you just hang up?" you giggle. he goes silent for a moment and you wonder if he cut out, but then he responds. 

"I wanted to say goodnight." 

it's like a cage of butterflies is unleashed in your stomach. you wrinkle your nose as you get nervous. god, you miss him. things would be so much better if he was back. not like he'd be in your bed even if he was, though.  

"then say goodnight." you prod. he lets out an awkward little sound. 

"now I can't because you made it weird." 

"how did I make it weird?" 

"I don't know, you just did." he's so clumsy, your face heats up. you want to keep talking like this until morning.

"goodnight, Spence," the words sound reluctant, but you try to cover it up by teasing him further. "see, was that so bad?" 

"oh my god, Y/N--" he tries to sound exasperated. 

"no goodnight back?" you raise an eyebrow even though he can't see you right now.  

a lengthy silence again. "goodnight."

"that's what I thought." before he can protest, you end the call, settle into the covers. moonlight beams on the walls of your apartment, and you start to think about your best friend. about all the nights spent curled up on his couch with two bowls of popcorn, his ramblings about how much he loves his job and him asking about yours. 

he's a great listener. every time you talk, he nods along like he's hanging off every word. it's nice to feel heard that way, to have someone care. and he's fun to hang out with, too. you've met his team before and they all talk about how hard it is to get him to go out, but they don't see the same side of him that you do. 

Spencer is nerdy and cute and kind and sensitive. he makes you feel special. he's everything that you've ever wanted in a person. but it's not like it would matter, anyway. he hasn't really shown interest in any girls-- much less you. even if he did, you're scared of ruining the friendship. 

the fallout of not having him around at all... it would destroy you. and something, even if it's torturous, is better than nothing. 

which is why, as you sit there and remember being around him, your fingertips creep below the comforter. a familiar routine, they move over your stomach, until they reach the waistband of your panties. for a moment, you hesitate. it's wrong. he's your best friend. but he doesn't need to know that this is how you handle the ache he puts between your legs. 

as your index finger slides down your slit, you feel the wetness already forming. Spencer's hands, his mouth. the thought of his lips pressed to yours while he fucks you, holding your body like it's delicate. 

you don't know exactly how it would feel because you've never had sex, but you want to find out with him. he's never done it, either. you don't care; all you need is to have him inside of you, to see how he looks when he's on the edge. 

your mind wanders to the image of him parting your legs and rolling his eyes into the back of his head. the sensation of him filling you up. falling apart. 

you slide a finger inside, gasping at the way your walls tighten and your imagination runs wild. that tongue, lapping and making you squirm, your fingers twisted in his soft hair. he's so sweet; his attentiveness would make your legs shake. you want to look into his eyes while he does it. 

you add a second finger, curl them and brush over the most sensitive part. the pressure of his hips grinding into yours. your body curves up at the way you start to finger yourself, the other hand stimulating your clit. it's almost overwhelming, the way his name tumbles from your lips over and over. 

you've never wanted someone so badly in your life; he belongs in your bloodstream. the sounds he would make in your ear before finally cumming and collapsing on top of you, spent. you want to tire him out and then do it all over again. 

you're greedy on the edge, indulging in every single image of him you can conjure up, every dirty thing you'd say. finally, you feel yourself fall, the orgasm intense as you bite back groans of pleasure and work through the high. it's amazing. 

you sit there, panting, feeling your heart beat in your chest. some things can't leave your head, they're so sinful. and the worst part is that you don't regret it in the slightest. 

...

Spencer can feel his pulse practically leaping against his throat as he makes his way through the empty warehouse. he should have waited for backup; he knows he should have, but it's too late now to go back and change things. 

he clutches his gun, pointing it in front of him while his eyes flicker wildly across the space. he's moving between enormous aisles stuffed with crates, not knowing who else is around. they said the unsub brought his newest victim here-- Spencer came first because was closest to the site-- but he hears nothing aside from the uneven rhythm of his own breath. 

every step is careful. he's thinking about how close the rest of the team must be. based on their distance from the station, they should arrive within six minutes-- but that doesn't account for the time it takes to put on their bulletproof vests, to get to their cars. 

truthfully, he doesn't know if he's going to have to do this on his own. and that scares him the most. 

there's no point in worrying. he swallows the lump in his throat and presses his back to one of the crates. there's a scraping noise a ways off that causes him to freeze. because of the echoes of the warehouse, the origin is indiscernible. he doesn't breathe, eyes darting between each of the openings into the aisle. 

after a minute of pure silence, he peels himself away and turns to head back out. 

and that's when the sound of wood cracking against bone startles him; he hears it before he feels it, but it's obvious when he crumples to the floor. like knife points pressing into his brain at all angles, the shooting agony in his skull. 

he starts to clutch at his head, only to be yanked off the ground by a meaty hand and thrown against the side of a crate. 

"fucking feds." the guy is enormous. gargantuan. he keeps his arm across Reid's throat, pressing down enough to restrict his airway. but Spencer can't even concentrate on the guy's face further than its rough outlines. his vision is going in and out, fuzzy at the edges from the blow to his head. 

he definitely has a concussion. 

"I..." he trails off. the huge FBI logo on his vest is a dead giveaway. 

"all alone?" the unsub has breath like rotten fish, spits each word into his face. "I won't even need my gun." 

Spencer's head lolls to the side and he catches sight of his own weapon lying helplessly a few feet away. there's no way he could get to it in time, even if he got out of this guy's chokehold. 

he tries to think of a way to talk himself out of this; after all, their profile said he'd be more susceptible to negotiation, but that's kind of hard to do with someone's forearm slammed against your trachea. he presses harder and Spencer sees stars. his glasses hang almost off the bridge of his nose, centimeters from falling to the floor. 

he starts to realize that he's going to die, defenseless and alone, in a warehouse. at the hands of a man who kills women because his Viagra doesn't work. but this doesn't incite the kind of panic Spencer always predicted he'd feel. the lack of oxygen in his brain causes him to go delirious. 

he misses home. his mom and his old house, even though things were hard. he misses Y/N, his team members. he wishes his team was here; he should have waited for them. he should have told Y/N how he feels. now she's never going to know. 

Reid is so out of it, he doesn't even notice the pressure being relieved from his throat until he collapses on the ground. the unsub falls, too, his cheek smashed by the force of the abandoned wooden plank. 

it's hard to tell what's happening until Reid lifts his head to see Morgan standing above him, preparing to handcuff the criminal.

"kid," Spencer never thought he'd be so glad to hear his voice. "what happened?"

...

you practically crash into Spencer's apartment the next evening, flinging your body through the front door with your spare key. 

"Spence?" you call out from the entryway. everything still looks the same, but when his colleague, Penelope, called you today to tell you that Reid had gotten a concussion after a run-in with an unsub, you rushed here as soon as you could. 

"in here." he calls from his bedroom. you don't hesitate, your feet carrying you there. you've been anxious all day; he didn't call last night or even text like usual. you were on the verge of panicking when Penelope called. 

of course, you knew that was the risk with Spencer. he knew the risk, too. his life would always be in the balance when it came to the cases, but he'd gone through so many at this point, you weren't thinking about it. if you did, you wouldn't be able to focus on anything else. 

when you walk in, the first thing you see is Spencer laying in bed in his silk pjs. there's a stack of unread books on his bedside table. his glasses sit on top. he's just laying there with his eyes closed. 

"oh my god." you mutter, dropping your bag on the floor and walking over. he opens his eyes with a slight smile. there's a purple bruise forming across his throat, light but definitely there.  

"hi." 

"what the fuck happened?" you ask the question you've been wondering the whole way here. 

"he hit me with a plank." Spencer explains, the phrase coming out like he's still confused about it. "I'm fine, just a mild concussion and a bruise because he choked me." 

you take a second to assess if he actually means that he's okay, or if he's trying not to worry you. he stares at your expression for a second. 

"Y/N, I'm really fine." 

"you don't look fine." you gesture to the fact that he's laying in bed. 

"my body is sore, but nothing's wrong with me. I just can't look at screens or read." this last part makes him much more melancholy, it seems. you reach down and ruffle his hair playfully. 

"sounds like a nightmare." 

"it is." he cracks up. 

"I'm glad you're okay." you sigh. your heart rate has slowed to a reasonable pace now that you know he's fine. Spencer gives a ghost of a smile, and when he pats the empty spot on the bed beside him, you kick off your shoes and climb over his body to sit down. "so... did you guys get him?" 

"the unsub?" he turns his head to look at you. something is in his eyes that you can't read. "yeah, he's in custody. we saved the girl he abducted, too." 

"well, aren't you a hero?" you grin, pinching his arm. 

"ow!" he flinches. "don't hurt the patient."

"oh, so now you're injured?" you giggle softly. his smile fades a bit, gaze trailing from your face to your legs. it isn't lustful or anything, more like he's taking in your existence. it still makes your heart flutter. 

"I wasn't really a hero, anyway," he sighs. "I got knocked down before I even found her." 

"oof." you wince. 

"yeah, it's sort of embarrassing. I went in by myself and--"

"you went by yourself?" you clarify, turning to face him. of course he did. 

"yeah." he avoids your gaze. 

"Spencer, I work in a stationery shop and I know you're supposed to wait for backup." you deadpan. he snorts, staring straight ahead at the wall. his hair is flat in the back from where he's been resting it against the headboard. 

"he would have hurt her if I had waited." he explains. your heart softens a bit at this. you know Spencer has a problem with saving people; sometimes he doesn't think things through. but you know that it's only because he cares. 

you smile gently, appreciating what a beautiful person he is. you don't understand how other people don't see him how you do. your hand reaches for his suddenly, and you find yourself snuggling into his shoulder. 

Spencer doesn't usually like touch, but he welcomes this, dropping his own head to rest on top of yours while you both stare at the wall. his silence feels heavy, more than it usually does, and you wonder what he's thinking. 

"I'm really glad you're okay, Spencer." your tone is low, like it's a secret. 

"you already said that." 

"shut up." 

"you care about me." he sing-songs with a smile, and you know he means it in a friendly way, but you don't care. it brings warmth to your cheeks. 

"whatever. you care about me, too." 

he lets out a slight chuckle. "when I started to black out, I thought of you." 

your heart leaps, even though the reason is pretty dark. "oh, yeah?"

"mhmm." he hums. 

"nobody's ever told me that they thought of me in their last moments of life before." you tease. there are so many things you'd like to say, but know you can't. he smells like himself and coffee beans, his skin warm beneath the silk of his pajamas. 

"I'd hope not."

"anything in particular?" you wonder aloud. 

"what?" you feel him tense beneath you, and that's how you know there's something he's not telling you. 

"were you thinking about anything in particular?" 

"someone's full of themselves." he jokes. you smack his arm.  

"humor me." more than anything, you want to hear his thoughts. you know you're reaching, but you don't care. 

"just..." he pauses, the next words coming out almost too quietly to hear. "things I never got to say to you." 

"like?" now you're intrigued. 

"no way." he laughs and you groan, turning and realizing that you've both sunk deeper onto the bed and are now practically lying down. 

"c'mon," you prod. you've flipped onto your side while you watch him, his eyes directed at the ceiling. "what if you'd actually died?" 

Spencer gives you a look, and you wish you could snap a picture of his face. the gentle features, the warmth in his eyes. he stares at you differently than before, and it makes your stomach flip again. "I, um." 

you start to trace your index absently down his forearm, where his sleeve has incidentally gotten rolled up. his skin is soft. you know that this isn't a friendly thing to do, but something inside you craves his touch right now. you almost lost him; you can't imagine how horrible that would be. 

"I wanted to say that I--" he gulps, muscles in his shoulder tight beneath your cheek. "well, I care about you, and I... I really love you." 

it's not the first time he's said it, obviously in a platonic sense. what affects you is that he's acting like it's a big deal. 

"I love you too, Spence." you smile softly. his chest rises and falls faster, his face tensed. 

"no, I mean--" he turns onto his side, using the action to distract from his own nervousness. he holds your gaze and you forget how to breathe as he speaks. every syllable is serious, but you note his fingers fidgeting at his side. "I'm in love with you." 

it's like all the air in the room has been sucked out. you swallow, unsure of how to react at first. you don't believe what you're hearing, simply because it doesn't make sense. you've been friends for a while, now, but Spencer has never made a move to ask you out or acted like he wanted anything more. 

your heart swells. 

"you're in love with me?" the words even feel surreal on your tongue. he takes it as rejection.

"I shouldn't have said that, I'm sorry." Spencer rubs his eyes with the heels of his hands, his expression turning to a cringe. he's about to sit up to hide the red in his cheeks, but you pull him back down by the shoulder. 

"not so fast, crazy boy." the corners of your mouth are turning up into a grin. you can't help it; every nerve in your body is alive. Spencer loves you. he feels the same way. 

when he sinks back down onto the mattress and sighs, preparing to say something that rescinds the statement to erase any awkwardness, you grab his face and turn it to yours. you don't kiss him, only force him to look. 

"I'm in love with you, too." 

his eyebrows fly up in surprise. "r-really?"

"yes." you nod. 

he takes a second to process this. you see about five different expressions pass over his face, each one reminding you of how earnest he is. and it's absolutely adorable. 

"well, that's good, isn't it?" he clarifies. you pretend to think on it. 

"I'd say so, yeah." 

he smiles. a genuine, rare one that makes your veins feel as if they're full of glitter. you're on Cloud 9. 

"can I kiss you?" you ask him quietly. he seems surprised at this, too, like he never thought you'd want that, but then nods eagerly. 

you close the gap between you on the bed, holding his jaw in one hand while the other rests on his forearm. your lips meet softly at first. he's cautious, scared of pushing you away. he hasn't kissed many people before. but he's good at it, letting you take the lead. 

there's no way to adequately describe kissing Spencer. every bone in your body turns to mush, immediately craving more contact. you slide your tongue across his full bottom lip, and he lets you in. his affection is the most loved you've ever felt. because sure, you haven't had sex, but you've kissed people before. 

never like this. 

one of his hands goes up to wrap around your forearm tenderly before he shifts to lie on his side. you wrap around each other, turning the kiss into a full-body embrace as you breathe in. you want more. your leg swings over his torso so you can pull yourself closer, and he groans into your mouth when your pelvis presses against his. 

the kiss gets more heated, his hands carefully but hungrily traveling down the curve of your waist. you flip so that you're straddling him without breaking any contact. 

you don't really think about the way your hips begin to rock against his, your pussy involuntarily working for friction. there are so many happy chemicals in your brain right now, you giggle against his mouth when his body bucks up into yours. he groans. 

"Y/N..." he breathes softly. his hands move from your waist to your thighs, afraid to dig his fingertips in. 

"what?" you sigh, licking over his bottom lip again. he moans at the way you keep grinding on his erection. 

"I wanna--" his eyelashes flutter when he gasps. "I wanna touch you." 

"do it." your palm is resting tenderly against his cheek. he responds by finally holding you down, sliding his body up a bit to grind against your center. you whine. "touch whatever you want, Spencer." 

his cock twitches in his pants and you push the hem of his shirt up while he uses one hand to massage your tits. the voracious, curious nature of his attention makes you sigh, touching his stomach. he feels perfect beneath you. 

soon you're grabbing at each other without any regard for grace. he's so horny, he's pawing at whatever he can while you do the same to him. the kissing gives way to straight panting while you look at each other. 

"can I suck your dick?" you whisper. Spencer's eyes widen. you've never seen him nod so fast. 

you press your mouth to his one more time before inching down his body, sucking on his clavicle, then his stomach. careful to avoid the purple marks on his neck. he watches you intently, memorizing the details of this moment for later. when you reach the waistband of his pants, you peek up. he strains against the material. 

your mouth drops open and you draw your tongue over the clothed bulge, maintaining eye contact. Spencer throws his head back. his voice is high. "oh my god, oh my god." 

you smirk, licking it again. he clenches his jaw. "I'm gonna c-cum if you don't--" he tries for words, but he's mewling and moving against your mouth. you pull at his pants, hooking your fingers in his boxers and bringing them down, too. 

Spencer bucks into the air when his cock hits his stomach. it's big, precum leaking helplessly out of the tip while he whines. you want him now. 

"wow." you smile. he stares at you, tensing his stomach as you wrap your hand around his length. he's trying to keep quiet, but as soon as you spit on it and start to pump him, his head falls back into the pillow. 

you draw your tongue up the underside, paying special attention to the veins, reveling in his reactions. he looks like he's ascending to heaven when you start to suck on the first couple inches.  

"o-oh, fuck..." he keeps moving his hips off the bed for more, so you sink down further onto him, hollowing your cheeks and moaning. "Y/N..." 

you groan in response, feeling yourself get wetter with every sound he makes. you can't believe this is happening, the way he threads his fingers loosely through your hair in an attempt to touch more of you.

he tries to keep his eyes open while you suck, but they squint with pleasure. he's a mess for you, shuddering gently when you take nearly all of him into your mouth. 

before he can cum, you pull your mouth off of him with a satisfying pop. Spencer moans. 

"was that okay?" you ask carefully. this is the extent of your sexual experience, and you want to do more with him, but you aren't sure how he feels. your best friend stares back at you like you've turned his world upside down. 

"y-yeah," he replies. his face is flushed. "definitely okay."

he's throbbing, occasionally twitching against his stomach as he waits for more stimulation. you eye him carefully. 

"what do you feel comfortable doing?" your voice is smooth. "we can stop now, if you'd like." 

"I--" he chokes on the word. "I don't wanna stop." 

"do you want to have sex?" you ask. Spencer bites his lip, whines. 

"mhmm." 

"I wanna do that, too," you breathe out, straightening up and pulling your shirt over your head, unclasping your bra, before getting to work on your shorts. you know you're practically dripping. he's been more vocal, but you feel like you're going to implode from the desire. "but I need to tell you something." 

"what?" he tugs your arm, coaxing you back to him and touching you greedily. you giggle as you kick your shorts and panties off somewhere in the room. both of you move like awkward teenagers. 

"I'm a virgin." you say. 

Spencer frowns. "really?" 

"yeah," you lick your lips. "so you need to be careful." 

"o-of course." he blushes, getting nervous again. "you know I'm a virgin too, right?"

"I know." you smile. he returns it sweetly, and the commotion of your bodies slows for a moment. you're so happy, you could cry. 

"what?" he breaks the comfortable silence. 

"I'm excited," you shrug. he's got his hands on your waist, rubbing his fingertips over your skin. then you remember something. "wait, are you allowed to have sex with your... injury?" 

"it's fine." he reaches up and kisses your throat with an urgency. 

"did the doctor say that?" your eyes roll while he sucks on your neck. he groans and pulls down on your waist so that your stomach presses against his cock. he ruts. 

"second opinion from me." he pants. you tap his cheek playfully, move up his body until your core brushes him. he whimpers when you reach between your bodies and grip his length in your hands. 

"you ready?" your voice is low. Spencer squeezes your thighs, eyes moving between your tits and your face. 

"yes." he sighs. you position it, slicking him in your pussy while he wraps an arm around your waist and moans for more. your chests are pressed together, looking into each other's eyes while you slide him into you. 

you have to go slow, the intrusion causing your jaw to drop. you don't breathe. he's got his eyes rolled into the back of his head.  

"Spencer." you whimper, dropping your head onto his chest when he's fully inside of you. his fingers rub patiently over your back. 

"are you okay?" his voice is laced with a moan, trying to resist thrusting. 

"yeah, just a second." you wiggle a little bit to test the boundaries. it hurts, but it also feels good. your clit is begging for more pressure, so you start to roll your hips. Reid moans loudly. 

"Y/N..." he whimpers. "don't stop." 

"you want more?" the need in his voice makes you hornier, and you increase the pace, despite the slight pain. you're so wet, he slides in and out without much effort. 

"so-- much more." he's gasping, hands on your thighs as he watches your naked body writhe on top of him. he's never been more aroused in his life, spurred on by your scent and form and the tightness that keeps clenching around his cock.

he understands why people love sex so much, now. he wants it every day, wants to fuck you in every position and pleasure you. the sounds you release in his ear, whines and praises, he would do anything for more. walk to the ends of the earth to feel you cum on his cock. 

his hand finds your ass, squeezes it. 

"this feel good, Spence? fucking your best friend?" you talk dirty and he twitches. you're always so sweet, the words coming out of your mouth for him are going to send the genius into a tailspin. 

"mhmm," he holds you down so that he can thrust up. speaking at all is a struggle with the way he's feeling. "perfect." 

you start to say something else, but he hits a certain angle and you let out a quiet yelp, hips jumping at the pleasure. "I'm gonna cum." 

Spencer gets a rush of relief because it's taking everything in him right now not to absolutely lose it inside your pussy. he's hanging on by a thread. "me, too." 

you use your position on top to stimulate yourself. both of you chase your orgasms roughly, the rhythm you created degenerating into clawing excitement. 

"cum inside me, Spencer." you beg him. it sounds like you would do anything to feel it, that sensation that you've never experience but have always imagined. and Spencer, his own head foggy with ecstasy, nods and opens his mouth to let out a loud groan. 

"Y/N, fuck fuck fuck-- I'm--" he shoots his load inside of you, rutting wildly and letting his head drop onto the pillow while he pants. you can feel it. strange, lovely jolts of his seed spreading. your hands, which have been resting on his shoulders, tighten and you reach your climax. you flutter around him, both of you still moving to ease the intensity of the high. 

it's remarkable. you're crying out, having the most mind-blowing orgasm of your life. you never thought your first time would be like this. but you're glad it is, muscles tightening and releasing with the mixture of emotions. 

you collapse fully, him still inside. 

neither of you speaks. his heartbeat thuds against your ear, and you hold onto him like letting go would be the end of the world. you can't believe you could have lost him. you don't want to think about it. 

"sorry I came so fast." Spencer apologizes breathlessly. you can feel his cum dripping down your entrance when he slides out. 

"I don't care." you mumble. both of you stay there for a while, his heartbeat changing to a pace that reminds you of genuine excitement. like a hummingbird. 

"we can try again, sometime." he offers. you lift your head to rest your chin on his chest. his skin is flushed, pupils dilated, hair messy. such a pretty boy. 

"we should try multiple times." 

he gives you a cheerful smile, and everything starts to fall into place. you took each other's virginity. "Y/N?" 

he likes to say your name, and you love to hear it. "yes?" 

"are we dating?" the bluntness of the question makes you giggle. you don't hesitate. 

"yeah." 

“good.”

taglist (lmk if you wanna be added/removed!): @reidsconverse @voidsfilm @xoxomgg​ 

[alltooreid]

Invisible String

Although Spencer Reid and the Reader don’t find themselves in a romance with each other until well into their adulthood, their relationship has been decades in the making. Almost as if something as been pulling them together all these years. 

A/N: sorry for such a long wait but i’ve been struggling a lot mentally as of late. i hope you guys enjoy this one shot!! As always requests are open and heavily encouraged!! And of course this is inspired by the taylor swift song of the same name :)) Also keep in mind although the following scenes are heavily inspired by some scenes in Criminal Minds, elements of them have been slightly altered to fit in Y/N as a character.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Reader

Type: a cute strangers to lovers fluff fic!

Word Count: 3.9K

Content Warnings: typical criminal minds case discussion, mentions of child trafficking when discussing this case, but no real detail. slight spoilers for season eight (beginning maeve stuff) and tiny spoilers for season fifteen (briefly mentions max but nothing really important to the plot at all)

“Time, curious time Gave me no compasses, gave me no signs Were there clues I didn't see?”

You had met Spencer Reid 3 times before you had really met him.  

It was almost silly to think about it now. Now that you and Spencer have been dating for 3 years, it was strange to believe there were so many chances for you two to meet years earlier.

When you were sixteen years old, you got your first part time job. You worked at a self-serve frozen yogurt shop called Iced Dreams. You hated it so much. Your manager was a total creep, your older coworkers were rude and condescending to you, since you were one of the youngest people working there, but most of all you hated the uniforms.

Consisting of a very stupid looking hat, bright pink with randomly embrodiered teal patterns, an outdated bright teal shirt, it had been given to you from a dirty bin in the back, and judging by the sewn in shoulder pads, it had to be at least a couple decades old.

So one day, you didn’t wear the hat.

It wasn’t entirely purposeful. You couldn’t find it, you searched your room, you searched your car, so eventually you had to leave without it to prevent being late. Still, as you clocked it and passed the box of extras in the office something made you decide to leave it alone.

You were about 8 minutes into your shift when your manager approached you. “Y/N? Where’s your hat sweetheart?” You hated this man so much. You had gone to your parents time and time again, recounting his creepy behavior towards you and the other teenage girls who you worked with, but they refused to let you quit.

When you had started working there, he used to enforce this ridiculous rule that all the female workers had to wear skirts as part of their uniform, but you had gathered all the sixteen and seventeen year olds who worked there and all threatened to quit if he didn’t change the policy. So you were no stranger to breaking and defying the rules.  

“Yeah I couldn’t find it, sorry.” you shrugged.

He chuckled and reached his hat out to touch your face. You jerked back, you almost wanted to refuse to wear one of the stupid extra hats just so that you could get fired.

“Well, Y/N its policy sweetie. No matter how special you are to me you still need to wear the hat. There’s extras in the office.”

“No way I’m wearing one of those. I bet they have like lice or something.”

He pursed his lips and sighed “Well I suppose that beautiful hair is just too pretty to wear a used hat huh. . . What do you suggest? If you’re working you have to wear it.”

You laughed, “Well you could let me go home.”

He paused, “Why don’t you go sit in the office, I’ll come talk to you in a minute.”

So you did, for about 10 minutes you sat in the office, surrounded by frozen yogurt flavor marking posters and boxes of old uniforms, and each passing minute you feared for the worst. Maybe you were actually getting fired? You really didn’t want to go that far, because, as much as you hated it, you really needed this job.

When your manager finally came to talk to you he held a small salted caramel frozen yogurt, your personal favorite flavor, and a twenty dollar bill. He handed them both to you.

“You seem so stressed Y/N, why don’t you take the day and go get lunch. My treat,” he said, smiling that weird twisted smile that always made your full body shiver.

However you were broke as hell, and no teenager in their right mind would ever pass up free food, so you took it, grabbed your keys and started to leave

Yet as soon as you walked out the back door you dropped your frozen yogurt, cup fully upside down, onto the pavement. You cursed, you hadn’t even taken a bite of it yet, and it looked like he had put coconut flakes on it, and you loved coconut. Still, you had your twenty bucks, and that was a pretty sweet pay out considering you were only clocked in for about 20 minutes.

So you got Chinese food, and spent what was supposed to be your shift in the shopping mall across town, completely and blissfully unaware of the fact the Behavioral Analysis Unit of the FBI was dragging your manager away in handcuffs.

➽───────────────❥

Young Spencer Reid had only joined the FBI about a month ago. Despite being a genius, and providing crucial information to the solving of cases, he was aware of the most obvious. He was only twenty two years old, and he was scrawny as hell.

He felt this intense need to prove himself, especially to make Gideon proud.

So when they got a case about a the kidnapping and sex trafficking of teenage girls, he saw it as something he could really involve himself in. Based on the profile, it wasn’t going to be a large, strong, confident unsub who Morgan needed to tackle. This man would be ugly sure, but he would be a manipulative mastermind. Reid could work with that, he could prove himself.

He surprised everyone with his sheer work ethic and determination to find this man, and through consistently revising and delivering the profile soon enough they got a hit. A young woman in her early twenties called the tipline and reported her own manager. Insisting he fit the profile perfectly, and described how strangely he treated the minors who worked there, and how he almost exclusively hired young girls, treated them great and then switched as soon as they became legal.

So Garcia did her magically digging, and soon enough the FBI was tearing up a frozen yogurt shop, looking for any evidence of pedophilia. Garcia was even brought along, as she was pivotal to discovering any secret files in his computer.

At first, all they could find were strange compilation videos and under employees skirts. Spencer, and the rest of the team, were struggling to connect how he could get so many videos from an angle like this without anyone noticing or reporting him, until Gideon uncovered an old dusty pair of shoes, in which the right one held a small camera at the toe.

Although this was absolutely disgusting, it wasn’t enough to prove he was running the ring or kidnapping the girls, so Garcia kept digging. Meanwhile, Spencer tried to make himself useful by checking out the back of the store.

That’s where he found your clock-out receipt.

“Hey guys, we might want to take a look at this,” he shouted out.

Morgan grabbed the paper from his hand, “Ok, I don’t get it kid, it’s trash.”

Spencer pointed to the details on the slip, “Yeah but it says here she clocked out 18 minutes ago after only working for 23 minutes and 46 seconds. If this guy is our unsub, this girl could be in a lot of trouble.”

“Maybe she’s still here, has anyone checked out the parking lot yet?”

Spencer shook his head, and followed Morgan out the back door. There they discovered some almost completely melted salted caramel frozen yogurt.

Morgan bent down to investigate, “Yeah, we gotta get this to the lab, but I can tell you right now that there’s clearly more than just coconut topping this yogurt. It also means we have another victim.”

Spencer crouched down as well, “Not necessarily.”

“What do you mean kid? We’re missing a teenage girl and we’ve already found illegal evidence on this guy's computer. She’s in trouble.”

“Well judging the shape and inscription of these pills it appears to be some pretty strong rohypnol, almost certainly prescription grade. And ingesting it like this means she probably would have begun to feel its effects fairly early, I would predict 15 minutes. She clocked out 18 minutes ago, so even if she left exactly at that time she would have certainly crashed her car on the way home. The nearest residence is 8 minutes away from here, we’re in a complete shopping district. There’s only two cars out here and neither have a passed out driver, so I would bet she didn’t eat any of it. Also, the only spoon out here is still wrapped in plastic, “ Spencer analyzed.

Morgan sighed, “Well what do we even do then?”

Before Spencer could answer Hotch opened the back door. “We got him.”

Spencer turned to Morgan, “I’m sure her phone number is somewhere inside, I say we call her and make sure she’s ok. She probably doesn’t even know this is happening right now.”

So he did find your phone number, and although he initially pushed the phone to Morgan, he just chuckled and pushed it back.

“No way pretty boy. You’re the know-it-all with all that profiling out there, you can call her,” and before he could protest Morgan left, so Spencer was left to call you.

And strangely, for it being the first time he would ever interact with the love of his life, he thought nothing of it.

And that was the first time you had met Spencer Reid.

➽───────────────❥

The second time was years and years later, when you were waitressing night shifts to make extra money. You had never forgotten meeting Spencer Reid the first time, but this was the first time you would ever see his face.

You were slightly concerned when you got a call from a man, whose name you had now long forgotten, claiming he worked for the FBI. Although you weren’t incredibly surprised to hear your manager committed such heinous crimes against children, you were taken aback by how close you had come to becoming one of his victims.

But that was 9 years ago. In your college days it became a fun story you told at frat parties, but you were 25 now. Sometimes you would think about the incident when you couldn’t sleep, and if you were feeling feisty you would use it as an icebreaker or a “two truths, one lie” statement, but otherwise you didn’t really think about it.

You had plenty of other things to worry about, in fact, that’s exactly why you worked so much. It was so much easier to forget when you were constantly preoccupied with complaining customers and terribly awkward blind dates.

You had just sat this man, incredibly handsome, however it was clear he was on some kind of date. His reservation was for two, and he spent way too much time adjusting his clothes and table setting for him to not be trying to impress someone special. He also brought a gift, which judging by the packaging and shape, seemed to be some kind of wrapped book.

Even though he was 15 minutes early for his own reservation, he still looked really nervous, almost like he already believed she might not show up. You couldn’t help yourself, you had to go talk to him.

“Anyone ever tell you you should model?” you started with.

He looked up “Excuse me?”

“Sorry for being so bold, you just look so familiar,” he weirdly sounded very familiar as well, but you didn’t tell him that. “Are you sure you haven’t modeled? You have excellent bone structure. I bet you could.”

He laughed to himself, “yeah I’m sure.”

“Well your date is very lucky either way. I wish I had a boyfriend as handsome as you. Actually I wish I had a boyfriend period, but that’s a whole other story.”

He chuckled, and although you knew in your heart that you shouldn’t be flirting with him considering he was 15 minutes away from being actively on a date talking to him made you feel something you hadn’t felt in a long time. “What happened with your boyfriend? Do I even dare ask?”

“Well I kind of always knew he wasn’t super interested in me, but I really liked him, so I did my best to ignore his wandering eyes,” you sighed. “That didn’t stop him from leaving me for his coworker though.”

“That’s terrible.”

You smirked, “That’s not even the worst part, he broke up with me over a 27 second phone call. He didn’t even let me respond, he just kind of hung up.”

“I’m sorry, no one deserves that. Especially not you. I’ve only been talking to you for a couple minutes and I can tell that.”

“Oh really? What makes you so sure?”

“I’m pretty good at reading people.”

You smiled, “Well I should probably stop flirting with you now, considering your date hasn’t even started yet. And don’t worry, she’ll show, you’re so handsome she’d be stupid not to.”

He looked confused. “You were flirting with me?”

You laughed, “I thought you were good at reading people?”

He smiled back at you, and it made your heart soar, this silly, pure goofy smile that made you want to replace his date and have dinner with him right then and there.

You walked back to your hostess stand. A couple minutes later you noticed the handsome stranger on the phone. You thought nothing of it until later when a woman came in, clearly nervous, holding a gift bag.

“Can you give this to Spencer Reid for me please?” You recognized the name, the man you were just speaking with had filed his reservation under it.

“Um, yeah sure, aren’t you going to go in? He’s at that table over the-” but before you could finish your sentence the woman was gone. Your heart sank, poor Spencer, how could someone drop their date off a gift but stand them up anyway? That��s just cold.

When you get up to bring the gift to him, he’s already heading out of the restaurant himself.

“Sir? Spencer? Dr. Reid?” he turned his head. “A lady came in and dropped this off for you.”

His face dropped, it almost looked like he was about to cry. “Thank you,” he said as he looked up at you before leaving.

He ran out the door, both gifts in hand and whipped his head around a few times before sighing and speeding off in one direction. Even before you learned what happened after that and leading up to it, you felt terrible for the handsome stranger.

How could you not for someone so clearly distressed? Someone so clearly in love?

➽───────────────❥

7 years and a divorce later you were spending your Saturday in a park, strangely contemplating love itself. Although you barely remember that night all those years ago when you spoke to Spencer, he did. Vividly. In fact, on this Saturday you both were in a public park, contemplating your many failed attempts at true love.

It was your first wedding anniversary without your husband. Although you had only been married for two years, you still were having a hard time navigating life without him. 

You started to wonder if you would ever find the true love you had been wishing for since your youth. Was 32 too late? Had you lived out all of your opportunities?

When you were little your mother had told you that all soulmates were attached at the left ring fingers, by small, incredibly thin strands of gold string, invisible to the naked eye. She insisted that these strings were constantly trying to pull you and your soulmate together, and that when life was ready for you two to meet, you would. 

Until then, you would have small, mindless interactions. Things you wouldn’t think about, maybe even things that weren’t interactions at all. You would get the same commercial jingle stuck in your head. You would both get an intense craving for the same food. You’d have the same dream. 

As a kid you were obsessed with this idea, you thought it was so romantic, and you fully believed everything your mom told you about it. You always asked her for more stories, and at bedtime you refused to sleep unless she would tell you more.

But now you were sure soulmates, true love even, didn’t exist. The invisible pretty gold strings your mother weaved fantastic stories with were completely fabricated. If they weren’t, you would have seen the clues by now.

Right?

➽───────────────❥

Spencer Reid was given an assignment from his therapist. He had to spend his Saturday off trying to interact with a stranger. Making friends with someone other than his colleagues may seem like a simple task for some, but it was something the young genius had almost no experience with.

He understood that it was probably for the best. He wasn’t exactly great with relationships of any kind, but especially not romantic ones. It didn’t take a genius to know that a couple of flirtations, a dead girlfriend he had only seen once, and a long time unrequited (or at least he thought unrequited) infatuation with his best friend and godsons’ mother was not a very great track record.

He, just like you, was also beginning to believe that he was hopeless when it came to love. That 38 was too old, that his time to meet someone and have the children he dreamed of had long passed.

But right as he was about to call JJ, to see if she would invite him in on the case Garcia had started to work on, he saw you.

Unlike you, he remembered your face and your interaction vividly. That almost date with Maeve was one of the biggest defining moments of his life, and what are the chances that the waitress from that very night was now less than 30 feet away from him, reading under the green leaves of a tree.

He wasn’t going to say anything, until he saw the book you were reading.

The Narrative of John Smith.

It must have been a sign, for what he wasn’t exactly sure yet, but it just had to mean something. The universe had to be reaching out to him, he had experienced crazier things.

And just as he was about to walk over to you, to close the gap between the gold strings tied around your ring fingers, a child interrupted his train of thought.

“That’s a strange haircut.”

➽───────────────❥

Derek Morgan and Spencer Reid were finally reuniting after many years. They barely got to see each other these days, but even though he was teaching and working at the BAU, Spencer still was willing to clear his schedule to second Derek suggested they meet up.

Morgan was excited as well, both to see his friend and to hopefully help him get a date. Sure, he had liked what he had heard about Max, but he wasn’t exactly surprised it had only lasted a couple months between her and Spencer. They just seemed too different.

Plus, now he got the chance to play wingman again, and he was ecstatic about that. Spencer not so much.

“I don’t know Morgan, it’s only been a couple months since we broke up. Wouldn’t it be too early to start talking to other people?”

“Pretty boy, you and I both know that the rate in which you’ve had relationships is not even close to the average. You need to balance that out somehow.”

Spencer sighed, he knew Derek was right, but he still felt strange.

“Morgan, have you ever heard of the red string of fate?”

“No, but I’m sure I’m about to hear all about it.”

“It’s an East Asian philosophy, based on the discovery that the ulnar artery connects the heart with the pinky finger, actually that’s where the belief in pinky promises come from. The reason it’s integrated in so many different cultures is that-”

“Kid, you’re losing me here,” Morgan interrupted. “Finish your thing about the string.”

“Oh yeah, sorry. It’s the idea that human relations are predestined by a red string that the gods tie to the pinky fingers of those who find each other in life. Legend has it that the two people connected by this thread will have an important story, regardless of the time, place or circumstances. The red string might get tangled, contracted or stretched, as surely often happens, but it can never break. Essentially, the idea is that although we might not realize it, our lives move in a pre-ordained direction, guided by invisible strings that are woven into the fabric of the Universe itself. And all the while, the red thread connecting us to our distant soulmates is getting shorter.”

“Well it’s an interesting theory kid, but it’s a lot to think about. I mean, we’re in a bar, let loose a little bit. Not every interaction has to be about getting closer to your soulmate. And sure, maybe you’ll meet them one day, maybe even soon. But you’re here now, and just because your one true love may not be, doesn’t mean it’s not worth it to be here.”

Spencer sighed, “You’re right. I don’t even know if I believe in that anyway, maybe I’m just looking for something to explain this all.

Derek patted his friend on the shoulder, “okay pretty ricky, this is how it’s about to go down. I’m going to buy you two drinks. You’re going to take both of them, and go find someone, anyone here to go talk to.”

“Ok, I think I can do that. Who?”

Derek looked around, trying to find who he believed would be the best match for his friend. “How about her?” he asked, pointing at you.

Spencer couldn’t believe it when he looked. There you were, the girl, the one he had met three times before, even if he could only remember two. The woman he knew was some sort of universe sent sign that Saturday he saw you underneath the greenery. The girl he was so close to talking to before he was interrupted by Max’s nephew. The woman who (and he obviously did not know this at the time) he would marry 3 years later. The one who would carefully knit the baby blankets for all of their friends and exes. The one who he would adopt 3 children with. The woman who, he was now sure, was at the other end of his invisible string. The girl he needed to talk to right now.

“Is it just me,” Morgan said, “Or does she look kind of familiar?”

“Yes,” Spencer responded, “yes she does.” He got up quickly and started making strides towards you.

“Wait!” Morgan called, “You forgot your drinks!”

“I don’t need them!” he shouted back. When he sat down next to you, you smiled. It made his heart soar, you had this silly, pure goofy smile that made him want to ask you out right then and there.

Instead he settled on the only conversation starter he could think of.

“Have you ever heard of the invisible string story?”

And you couldn’t help but laugh.

“A string that pulled me Out of all the wrong arms right into that dive bar Something wrapped all of my past mistakes in barbed wire Chains around my demons, wool to brave the seasons One single thread of gold tied me to you”

- Thank you for reading! Please reblog and let me know what you think :))

[cosmicclownboy]

hi- why don't you like Maria?

Oh lord.

Where do I even begin with Maria.

Season 1

Makes a joke about Alex's secret relationship being with Wyatt and finding it funny- (Wyatt who is an abusive racist dude who commits hate crimes and bear in mind she knows Alex was abused for being gay) IT'S GROSS.

Speaks about Alex's secret relationship guy being his home to Alex and literally feels his hopefulness because it is part of her alien ability and continues to pursue Michael in s2.

Maria (straight) outs Michael to Liz. That's not okay on any level.

When Liz tells Maria to speak to Alex before doing anything she ignores the advice and does what she wants.

She's really smug about Michael picking/pursuing her like she won.

Season 2

Pursues Michael at a funeral in front of Alex without talking to him.

Makes Michael's loved ones husband funeral about a relationship status

Slut shames a random woman who makes out with Michael when they were never exclusive

Enters a relationship with Michael where he has to be exclusive but she doesn't because she doesn't believe he could be faithful. That's reeks of harmful biphobia stereotypes.

Ignores Alex the whole time UNTIL she needs something.

When she appears at Alex's door she says they are even. AKA comparing Alex not telling her a secret that wasn't his to share to her pursuing the love of his life in front of him without any empathy and ignoring the whole time.

Bitches to Alex about Liz and wanting fuck all to do with her. Alex has to remind her Liz has a dead boyfriend and is struggling cause Maria only has Maria vision and lacks empathy for her 'best friends'.

Uses her mom's laptop to get the scope on Alex/Michael's relationship which reads 100% manipulative. She even says Michael is pushing you away and then proceeds to encourage the narrative where Michael pushes Alex away because she suddenly wants Michael. And of course Alex is supportive she recognises he lacks self worth and rolls over him.

Beginning of 2x06 she tries to set up Forlex to get Alex away from Michael. Once again manipulative.

Tries to make Alex feel guilty for being gay in 206 because when she was a kid she idealised being with him and had to come up with a whole new plan. He grew up in an abusive household you know that....It's not okay to say that. You know how much internalised homophobia he has.

When saying he's had good relationships provides only examples of relationships with women......................HE IS GAY.

Asks him if he would change being gay.......jfc.

Alex tearfully saying he dissociates with women because he clearly forced himself to out of internalised phobia, Maria takes it to mean she has a chance. She thinks she's the exception since a touch starved abuse victim liked to be touched by her in high school. That doesn't = consent.

When Alex, a whole ass Airforce Captain tells her it's unsafe to stay at the creepo's place she acts all I am feminist about it and this results in Alex being stabbed and Michael getting whacked on the head.

Earlier in the episode she whinges to Alex about Michael kissing another woman in front of her and how cruel it was and then proceeds to kiss Michael in front of Alex KNOWING how he feels for Michael.

In THAT scene it's clear she notices Michael's emotions towards Alex and is insecure about it. She uses Malex's feelings for each other to her advantage. She's chasing the fantasy of getting with Alex. These are two highly traumatised queer men who struggle to say no because they spent their lives in abusive environments.

Neither Michael or Alex were in a position to consent to sex that night Michael is concussed from a whack on the head . Alex has lost a lot of blood and is completely out of it. And neither would ever initiate that situation. Not to mention the assumption Michael would be down because he's bi is so harmful as a stereotype.

"I think she’s cool with her decision. She wanted some answers, so subconsciously there was an emotional comfort she needed. But she also had a little bit of an agenda. She needed some decisions made about the status of their relationships, so she thought, “Let’s throw everything against the wall and see where it lands.” I think she was just wondering if they made any progress on that front. She said it was OK for their feelings to be out in the open, but let’s just voice them for what they are. As we saw, Michael stepped up and was like, “No, I still love you and I’m with you.” Secretly, that’s what Maria was hoping for. By suggesting a threesome, she’s was basically telling Michael, “Make your choice… and I hope it’s me.” this is what Heather said about the scene. So not only was it coercive and such but she used her best friend like that with no care or empathy whatsoever. It's disgraceful.

The next day both Michael and Alex are confused by what the fuck happened. Alex due to his C-PTSD completely dissociates from the situation and Michael attempts to laugh it off despite him being hella confused. The only person who isn't confused is Maria who is listening to them from inside.

When Michael comes in she turns on the tears just in case he does want Alex afterwards. Bear in mind she is a psychic who can feel everything and she assumed Michael was going to go after Alex. Doesn't that say it all. SHE KNOWS MICHAEL IS IN LOVE WITH ALEX AND VICE VERSA. She does not care, because at the end of the day this is what she wants. She wants to win. She wants to treat Michael like this trophy that she can show off to people I got the great Michael Guerin not a relationship guy to date me.

When Michael wants to have emotional conversations she shuts it down for sex. The entirety of the relationship it has to be her way or the high way. She also recognises fairly on his abandonment issues and plays upon it, reads manipulative.

When Michael who has lost his mom and brother in the span of a few months asks Maria to be more careful about her abilities she doesn't listen. And ultimately breaks up with Michael when she can't get what she wants from him which is a yes man who will do what she says and isn't the idealised Michael she wants.

Season 3

Shits on Michael any chance she gets. She's so mean to him and he goes out of his way to look out for her.

Is dismissive of her own health despite the fact that everybody goes out of their way to help her. Liz is in California working on a way to help her. Kyle is risking his job.etc

Is fine with Liz, her best friend losing the love of her life to get a vision to prevent a murder. A vision she's only invested in because apparently in it she blames herself.

Is fine with Max or Kyle dealing with the guilt of her death had Michael not saved her.

Shoves Michael and belittles him because he's stronger then her. Infers he just sits on his ass and does nothing therefore does not care about anything....rude. There's also a weird superiority complex that her power is more important then Michaels or any of pod squad for that matter.

Creates a situation that is so bad that Kyle risks his doctors licence to give her adrenaline. Just take an ice bath or something there are a 1000 ways to give yourself adrenaline without risking your life and risking others.

Doesn't thank or acknowledge what Liz is doing for her honey has spent a FULL YEAR of her life trying to help and your just like yeah I'll let her soulmate die for my visions.

Emotionally guilts Isobel for not hanging out with her despite the fact she's hated her for two seasons and now has just randomly decided she wants to know......okay

This idea that Maria is suddenly lonely when she's the second of the main cast (first being Kyle) to have scenes with all the mains by Monday. Literally everyone is there at her beck and call but Maria is lonely??? IT DOESN'T ADD UP. Everyone's up her arse 9/10 how is she lonely everyone expresses concern and care for her ALL THE DAMN TIME. She's also narratively never had scenes that give the connotation that she is lonely. Michael has scenes that connotate he is lonely. Max and Alex do too. Maria has yet to have scenes that give the connotation of feeling lonely or depressed.

Maria comparing the alien siblings to her and feeling left out when she acts superior to them and they are literally siblings. Literally every character is somewhat left out with Pod Squad they've lived their lives assuming it's just them three against the world it's not a personal attack.

Maria is 1/8 alien at best so diluted genetically it doesn't show up and somehow she believes she has the capability of the aliens who are 100%. Say you have French DNA you don't expect to speak French suddenly.

This whole Maria never does wrong narrative and it's empowering that she's doing all of this just feels like a crock of shit tbh.

She reads like a 2000's movie mean girl.

All of my bullet points are why I don't like h Maria and it's not biased because I'm a so and so fan. Narratively she just wins up doing shitty things to Michael and Alex the most.

[antiloreolympus]

7 Anti LO Asks

1. Do you know what really gets my blood boiling about this comic? Persephone and Demeter's relationship.

In the myths, Demeter and Persephone loved each other more than anything. Their reunion is so important - it marked the coming of spring and growth. A whole cult was dedicated to this for crying out loud. Yes, the myths were far from perfect, but the Persephone and Demeter myth showed the strength of a loving mother-daughter relationship with Demeter searching endlessly to find her child that was ripped away and had her innocence forcibly taken.

Now, RS is not the only author to make Demeter this over-bearing mother type in order to put more positivity onto the Hades-Persephone relationship. However, RS takes this trend to a whole new level - to the point where I would even consider it misogyny.

How is it, she takes this beautiful mother-daughter relationship and makes it out to be an abusive and controlling one, and then takes the Hades-Persephone relationship from a forceful one to a loving, perfect relationship with no problems? How is it ok to ruin one relationship to elevate another?

I understand that many versions of the myth try to downplay Hades' actions, and even make it so Persephone actually falls in love with him and there is no rape. But it doesn't change that this relationship was problematic, and meant to represent the loss of innocence.

Then fans have the gall to claim this comic is feminist and then claim on top of that that Demeter and Persephone's relationship was the same in the myth? These fans clearly don't know the myths, and neither does RS.

Making Hades a good person is fine. Changing it up a bit to make Persephone's loss of innocence something else is also fine. But ruining Demeter and Persephone's relationship? Especially when Persephone has to spend half the year with her? So horrible. 

2. im sorry, but rachel cant introduce KRONOS coming back and then dropping it for several episodes to focus on a stake-less trail and persephone not knowing what lingerie to seduce hades in. like thats too much of an earth shaking development and huge stake plot point to just ignore for months to focus instead on something as minor as hxp's relationship, which only points out a huge flaw: why is hxp's relationship so minor in this? isnt the whole point supposed to be about them?

3. I think LO completely dropped the ball over Hades’ characterization. 

From the first ep I thought ok, this is good, we have some bones to see he’s not that lucky in love and is just tired and lonely, and while ignoring the creepy actions towards Persephone, I thought ok, Artemis hates him, Hestia hates, even Ares hates him, maybe once Persephone finally sees the underworld and probably gets to know him it’ll be a clever twist and they’ll be proven wrong. The underworld will turn out to be fair and just, the citizens will love Hades, he’ll be revealed to be a good leader and king and not like his brothers, it’ll be like everyone saying Hades of myth isn’t actually that bad, and it’ll help reinforce why this sweet and bubbly Persephone wants him, she sees the real him, not the mean rumors and assumptions, this is perfect.

And then it just didn’t happen. The exact opposite happened, actually.

We’re shown the LO underworld is cruel and unjust, where the poor dead are forced into slavery and Hades created a harsh class divide with him and him only on top, the citizens hate him, the underworld gods don’t trust him and openly seem ok if he’s taken out of power, he’s not a good leader and king and doesn’t even want the job yet keeps it for his own ego and grip of power m, and on top of it all he is just like his brothers, if not worse. He loves to get violent over any little slight against him, he hoards wealth and resources to enrich himself while his citizens starve and struggle to survive, he’s corrupt, he controls all the media and laws to bend to his will, sleeps with his brothers wife for centuries behind his back while claiming to be holier than thou, he has sex with his secretaries who are made dependent on him for any way to survive, and now he lusts after his barely legal intern who is also now dependent on him for her way to survive, and that’s only what I remember off the top of my head.

LO perfectly set up to prove Hades isn’t the devil or the false pop culture assumption that he’s evil and to show some actual facts from myth, and yet Rachel only ended up reinforcing exactly that and even making him even worse with her made up ideas, all while thinking having Persephone ignore or excuse it somehow makes it not bad or even a good thing. It’s honestly kind of impressive just how bad of writing that actually is. 

4. Chapter 172 is not that interesting. It’s setup had me excited to see Hephaestus and Hera and learning more about echo, but it’s cut so short. Because again the story can’t leave HXP out for 2 seconds.

I can also see why Zeus is gonna go insane. 

5. i agree w/ other anon. LO should have pulled a PJO or a BoZ and just made up OCs and have them interact with the gods than whatever Rachel thinks shes doing, which is lying she's being accurate and faithful while completely changing all of it, removing what is needed, and adding what isnt so that it lines up with no actual myth besides like, various 50 shades fanfic she read in 2015 and some popular tumblr text posts.

6 . the animation studio behind blood of zeus literally can only draw one face for the men and one face for the women and they were still able to make the gods all look distinct and hot while LO can't even bother to use more than 6 colors and can only have the women look as tiny as possible with the biggest boobs while the men are all just lego men.

7. ////FP SPOILERS////

Okay so like I stopped reading LO way back before season 1 ended, and a majority of my knowledge of the series comes from what I read here on your blog which is enough for me lol and I decided to read the latest 5 chapters just to see what's up (on zahard. I refuse to give the actual series any views)

And I just. Could not take the whole scene with Daphne running from Apollo seriously? The anatomy and art inconsistency was so distracting that i genuinely could not find it serious. Even when Thanatos discovers her hibernated body I couldn't take it seriously because of how she looked?

And when Hades had that call (??? Was it a call? Or his inner dialogue? I couldn't really tell ngl) with Zeus and said he's causing Persephone unnecessary distress, and that she didn't pose any threat. B!tch??? She killed a ton of mortals??? She has no control over her powers???? She's literally a fugitive for the aforementioned things??? She apparently woke Kronos up? (Idk if anyone knows about that, again my knowledge only spans to whatever I read here) Hello????

And I have a lot to say about the chapters starting the trial but I'll only mention one thing; Hades saying "I don't think blindly supporting my little brother would be doing him any favours (as a ruler)" had me cackling. This is coming from a guy blindly supporting a girl he's literally only known for a few weeks, who's like what, only recently turned 20? Sit tf down Hades you're not cool, you creepy ass overgrown smurf.

Overall I still hate this series lmao. Regarding art though I feel like I wouldn't be so miffed about the anatomy much if the character designs were consistent and the story was compelling. They literally change hairstyles and body types frame by frame, and it's distracting.

The timeline from what I read here is laughable. 4 years in publication with almost 200 chapters and you're telling me only like a month has passed canonically. That's wild and such poor writing.

And as someone who literally will sympathise with any lead character pretty quickly, the story makes me hate them. It makes me want to root against them. I also hate the fact this trash is somehow top ranked on webtoons when so many other stories are far better then it.

Anyway, many thanks to this blog for existing and allowing me to dump so much text here to vent out my hate for this series lmao. You the mvp fam, hope you're having a good day 🥂🥂🥂